#how everyone’s like we DO NOT answer to foreman

[silentflashoflightning]

love it when house does that little trick called bailing from work and the office becomes a battle arena

[cosyvelvetorchid]

Bucktommy prompt

Out on a call Buck accidentally says his last name is:

'Kinard. No...wait, BUCK...BUCKLEY!'

and the whole team hears it.

He's super embarrassed because he's only been dating Tommy for a couple of months, and the 118 rib him about it for the rest of the shift.

This one made me laugh so much! Thank you!

You can send any bucktommy, saltommy or Tommy prompts to my ask 🩶

*****

5 months, 14 days and 18 hours. That's how long Evan Buckley had been dating Tommy Kinard. And yes he had counted. It had been both a whirlwind and the calmest relationship he had ever been in. Every day felt like the flirty, giddy honeymoon phase, and simultaneously with the ease of a decade together.

Buck knew he had a tendency to get ahead of himself; to go all in with what he wanted or was passionate about, but Tommy had the, quite frankly magical, ability to pull Buck back down to earth without making him feel like an over excited child. That didn't stop how from secretly imagining a future with Tommy of course.

The 118 arrived on scene of a scaffold collapse to find a construction worker on the ground underneath a large piece of wood.

"Chim, Hen you assess him, I'll speak to the foreman."

"Uh that's me." The portly middle-aged aged man standing above his injured colleague called out. "Colin Denison." He reached out his to shake Bobby's hand.

"Captain Nash." The man then held out his hand to Buck.

"Kinard.. No wait! BUCK! BUCKLEY!"

Bobby, Hen, Chim and Eddie's eyes all shot to Buck, whose face burned with the fire of a thousand sun's. He made a silent prayer for more scaffolding to fall and land directly onto him. Only death could take away this level of embarrassment.

"What did you just say?" Eddie asked with a smirk.

"Nothing" Buck replied quickly.

"Did you just say you're name was-" Chim tried to ask but Buck cut him off.

"Nope." A lie. An obvious, slap in your face, kick you in the crotch lie. He knew it, they knew, God himself knew it. He turned his attention to Bobby and the foreman and tried to ignore the stifled giggles behind him.

"Im just glad the rest of my guys were at lunch. If they have all been up there.." Colin shook his head. "Is Dave gonna be okay?" He fielded the question toward Hen and Chim.

"Couple of lacerations, definitely a broken wrist and he's gonna have some gnarly bruises, but he'll be fine."

"Hey Tomm- sorry Buck.. can you bring the gurney." Hen teased. Buck shot her a glare before walking back to the ambulance, coming back a moment later with the gurney.

"Thanks, Tommy." Chim sang.

"Come on guys." Buck pleaded, wishing another sinkhole would appear and swallow him whole. Or maybe a lightning strike. Hell, being on a capsized cruise ship would be better than being here right now.

"He's stabilised Cap. We just need to get all this crap off of him." Eddie informed him. "You wanna help Tommy?" He added. Buck groaned.

"Hey guys let's keep it professional - we have a job to do."

"THANK YOU Cap." Buck praised narrowing his eyes at everyone. Cap pointed to the large piece of wood covering the man.

"Eddie, Hen, Chimney, you take that side. Kinard you're with me."

"Bobby!"

***

Buck was more grateful than ever for his shift to be done with. Even more so that he was headed straight to Tommy's. He let himself in, kicked off his shoes - stopping to admire how warm it made him feel looking at both his and Tommys shoes sat side by side - and walked into the kitchen where Tommy was busy preparing dinner.

"Hey babe." He was stirring some sauce in pot as Buck walked over and pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. "Good shift?"

"It was fine." Buck answered plainly. He had already humiliated himself enough today.

"Nothing happened?" Tommy asked.

"Nope." Buck said popping the 'P'. Tommy stopped starting and turned to face him.

"Really? Nothing? Nothing at all?" Buck noticed the glint in his eye.

"Who told you?!"

"Who do you think?" Tommy laughed. "I don't think Chims ever texted me that much before. Actually, it was mostly voice notes of him and Hen laughing."

"Oh god." Buck held his head in his hands as embarrassment soared through him. It was bad enough everyone else heard him but now that Tommy knew about it..

Tommy laughed and walked over to him, putting his arms around his waist.

"Hey." He said, wanting Buck to look at him, which he slowly did.

"Look, Evan.. were not near that step quite yet, bu-" Bucks head went down again, and he groaned. "But-" He said louder so Buck would look at him again. "I like that the idea of it doesn't freak you out. It's.. its actually kinda nice."

"Y-Yeah? You don't think I'm an idiot that's going overboard again?"

"Oh I definitely think that," He said with a laugh "but.." He placed soft kisses onto Bucks forehead, cheek, birthmark and finally his lips. "..I happen to love that about you." Buck sighed with relief.

"Although, what if I wanted to be a Buckley?" He asked half teasing.

"Are you kidding? I don't want to be a Buckley, so you're definitely not."

"Oh is that so?" Tommy questioned kissing him on the lips again.

"Yep." Buck smiled kissing him back.

"Noted." Tommy stated. "Now, come taste this sauce." He took Bucks hand and led him to the stove.

[pretending-ican-write]

Cowboy Up - Pt.4

A/n: I think there will be another part after this before the show starts and they will be getting together! I'm currently going through episode by episode and pulling out all the scenes I want to be a part of this. No promises that this won't get abandoned or take forever to write but I do have a mental endgame for it in s5!

Pairing: Ryan (Yellowstone) x Dutton!reader

WC: 871

Previous part - Next part

---

The peace of a still sleeping bunkhouse was disturbed by Rip rushing in and the loud bang of the door against the wall.  

“Lloyd, have you seen y/n?  She didn’t answer the door and the trailer’s locked,” he asked hurriedly scanning the bunkhouse, “Ryan why the fuck are you on the couch?”

Rip looked at the hand under the blankets and connected dots as Lloyd stirred from his own bunk to ask what was going on.  The foreman stormed into the other room to find exactly what he expected, y/n just waking up in Ryan’s bunk.  She rolled over and looked over up at him confused.

Y/n pulled herself up in the bed, “why are you shouting at 4 in the fuckin’ morning Rip?”

In lieu of an answer, he turned back around to where Ryan was waking up and hauled him to his feet to shove against the wall.  Suddenly everyone in the bunkhouse was awake and aware of what was going on.  They all surrounded the pair but nobody was about to get in the middle of whatever was going on, except y/n who was being kept from getting in between them by Jake.

“What the fuck is she doing in your bunk,” he growled.

Y/n shook Jake off her, “the hell Rip!  There’s no heat in the trailer and I was freezing my ass off in the barn so he insisted I come in here.  Stop being such an overprotective asshole!”

“If you even think about laying a finger on her in any capacity I’ll have them,” Rip threatened before releasing him and turned to the rest of them, “that goes for every one of you fuckers.  She’s off limits.”

He didn’t wait for an answer and headed out of the bunkhouse leaving the crew speechless.  Y/n turned to Ryan and checked that he was okay before storming after the foreman.

“What the actual fuck do you think you’re doing Rip!” She yelled at him, “you have no right to do that.”

Rip turned to glare at her, “he’s taking advantage of you.”

“Oh give me a break.  He was being a gentlemen which is more than can be said for most people in there.  I’m not a little girl that needs your protection anymore.  I can make my own decisions and I’m big enough to own my mistakes and Ryan certainly wouldn’t be one.  But I don’t think you need to worry, I’m hardly his first pick,” she finished bitterly.

Y/n went back to the bunkhouse in search of coffee, leaving Rip to wonder what on earth she had meant.

-/-/-

A few years later (like 6 months before the show starts)

After a long day of working the cattle for the spring gather, everyone from the valley was settled around the corral enjoying Gator’s cooking and each other’s company.  Y/n was sat to the side of the crowd having finished her food, just taking in the atmosphere of her favourite day of the year.  Gentle country music filled the air from a speaker Jamie had set up by the grill and some of the hands were showing kids how to rope on the dummy steer.  A smile graced her face as she watched Ryan and one of the newer hands, Colby who had become fast friends with him, helping a young girl swing the lasso above her head.

John watched his daughter from his seat next to Lee and how at peace she seemed with her life back on the ranch.  He picked up his beer and went to join her on the straw bale she’d claimed.  Y/n smiled at her father sat next to her before turning her attention back to the scene in front of her.  They sat in a comfortable silence for a little while, a significant improvement on how they’d been when she returned years ago.

“I think it’s time that we have our annual conversation,” John started, “even if nothing has changed.”

She took her eyes off the wranglers to look at her dad, “everything and nothing has changed dad.  I belong here again.  I finally feel like I’m part of it again.  But Kayce still isn’t here and I don’t see that ever changing.  I love you but you’re a stubborn man and lord knows my brother is too.”

“You set the terms but being back under the roof is where you belong,” he pushed.

Y/n allowed the silence to envelop them again as she thought through what was being put in front of her.  The sun was just beginning to set, casting a golden glow over the valley.  The wranglers had left the kids to the roping in favour of beers by the fence and Ryan winked when they made eye contact.  

“I’ll come back,” she relented, “but you don’t get a say over what I do and when I’m there.  I’m still gonna spend time at the bunkhouse because at the end of the day I’m a wrangler and those are my friends.  It took long enough for them to see me as more than just your daughter and I don’t want them to see me differently again.”

John smiled at her, “I’m just happy you’ll be truly home.”

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#355

“Hey Wilson.  Get over here….  I hear you are a faggot cocksucker.  Are you?...  Don’t bother answering.  I heard from Rebecca that her husband, Deputy Akers, questioned you at the rest stop on the highway.  When she told me that, I was going to talk to my father to get you fired.  We don’t need your kind around here.  I was telling Frank and Burt that I was going to do it, and you know they both told me not to.  Frank said he would quit if I did that.  It seems that you’ve been gobbing their knobs for some time….

“Frank and I go back a long time, to our days in the Corps.  We used to go through whores together, hundreds of them.  When he said you suck better than all of them, I thought no way.  Burt totally agreed.  Frank told me I should give your mouth a try, that your mouth knows how to take care of a big dick.  But unlike the bitches we used back in the days, you can take a good skull fuck.

“That got me thinking.  If my best bud from the Corps and my six-foot six foreman—two of the manliest men I know—can let a faggot swing on their dicks, when they can get any woman they want, you must be that good.  You better be that good. 

“I made sure everyone has left for the day.  It’s just you and me.  If you mention this to anyone, even Frank and Burt, I will personally shove my fist so far into your face that you will have to reach behind your head to pick your nose.  That’s not just a promise, that’s a fucking threat.  Now get on your knees.

“The fuck?... You want another bitch slap?  Then don’t fucking look up at me….  Did you just say, ‘Sorry Sir?’  That’s right you know who’s fucking in charge.  It’s big isn’t it?  It gets thicker at the base.  I know you fags like to know size, that’s eight and a half inches of grade A beef. 

“To the root faggot.  To the fucking root.  Oh fuck.  Oh man.  Damn boy, Burt and Frank were right, you know how to take a cock.  But this isn’t about you bobbin’ my knob.  I’m in control of this fucking blow job.  That’s it, gag on it faggot.  Your throat pussy is sliming up my dick real good…. 

“No, this is no pussy; this is a cunt.  Cunts are meant to be used and tossed aside.  Treat them like shit.  Make them feel that they are nothing.  They are nothing.  You know what?  You are worse than that.  Pull off.  What do you have to say about that, faggot?

“…Jesus fuck.  You want to be treated like a piece of shit?...  Do Frank and Burt treat you like that?...  They do?  And faggot, you were addressing me as ‘Sir’ at the end of each sentence a few moments ago.  I want that to continue. 

“What does Frank do to you to treat you like shit?...  Smacks you around?  Across the face like this?...  Oh yeah.  I like doing that.  Very few bitches know how to take a hand slap and know that it is a man’s right to assert his dominance….  The best part of cunt slapping you is that I don’t have to hold back my strength, and you thank me afterwards.  I’m beginning to get the appeal of you faggot.  What else does Frank do to you?  He probably does your ass….  I knew it….  He also shoves his fist in there?...  How the hell does that work?...  Nevermind.

“What about Burt?  What does he do to you?...  Oh that’s nasty.  You stick your tongue into his ass crack?  Why?...  What the fuck?  What if there’s skid marks?...  You really are disgusting.  You want to eat his ass like that?... And drink his piss?...  Of course you are a piss drinker. 

“In the corps, there were a couple of bitches that Frank and I would fuck before pissing all over them.  Do you drink his piss too?...  What do you mean you drink from ‘all of them’?  How many other guys on my payroll use you?...  Just one?  Who?...

“…No way!  My dad’s best friend Clay Richardson?  The man I have known since I was a boy?  That one?  Wow.  And what does he do to you?...  The entire weekend?...  And when you are not tied up in his basement?...  You are a party whore?  Fuck, I haven’t been to a guy’s night out with a party whore in years, and you do it every weekend?  What do you do there?...  Yup, that’s a party whore’s duty, but you are a faggot.  You probably do a lot more. 

“As disgusting as you are, and you are quite disgusting, my dick is rock hard and leaking.  I can see why Frank and Burt were so protective of you.  You going to Clay’s tonight?...  What time is he expecting you there?...  That’s forty-five minutes from now.  You show up like that?...  OK.  What if you are late?...  He’ll whip you?  Well, my cock stands between you arriving on time and you being whipped. 

“Get that mouth open.  I’m in control of this blowjob.  I don’t care if you gag, puke, or pass out; I’m not going to stop.  Breathe when you can. 

“Fuck yeah.  That face was made to be slammed into my crotch.  Your throat is better than any cunt, bitch, or whore I have been with.  The throat slime is so juicy.  Oh man, I will be using this quite frequently.  It’s not going to be long.  Faggot.  Oh fuck.  I’m going to be fucking brutal to you.  So brutal, that you are going to want to quit.  But I ain’t going to let you quit.  The guys won’t let you quit.  You belong here to be on your faggot knees.  I’m going to enjoy smacking you around.

“I’m getting close.  You ready?  Don’t give a shit if you ain’t.  Here it comes.  Here it comes.  Faggot!  Here it cuuuuuummmmms!  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.  Goddamned!... Whew!  I will be using that throat going forward.

“No. No. Don’t pull off.  I need to piss….  Ahhhh!  That feels so good.  So fuckin’ natural.

“Fag, fag, fag.  You really need to get going if you are not going to be late….  What are you doing?  Get back on your fucking knees.  I’m not done with you.  I want to know what it’s like to have a tongue inside my shithole.

“Of course that will make you late for Clay’s party.  In fact, I’m going to take you there directly from here.  And I am going to ensure you are late.  I want to watch him beat you.  I want to see you servicing Frank and Burt.  I’m fucking crashing that party.

Here’s my ass.  I trust you know what to do….  Oh fuck.  Oh Fuck.  Goddamned.  Man alive!  I’m going to set my watch timer.  You have thirty minutes back there.  I expect your tongue to be active all that time.”

[queerheadcanoncentral]

Request from @gfuudb

"House and Wilson: so its like an episode of house execpt its Wilson treating a patient but he suddenly pukes blood and then collapses and then its a lil time skip of like 10 minutes and its House storming in to his office and raises his voice as he tells everyone what happened to Wilson and that their taking the case so he’s frantically having the team (of your choice whether its the original three or the second ones or a mix) give him ideas ect. And it ends in fluff pls"

(It's my first time writing anything like that so I'm sorry if it's a bit rough. Also all the medical information is from only one article to it's probably not medically accurate)

—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—⁠☆—

It was a slow morning for everyone. Especially for Wilson. No face to face meetings with patients, just some prescription renewals and an email consult or two.

Everything was going great, except a slight cough that didn't seem to want to leave him, even House hasn’t bothered him today yet.

As he was looking over an email a strong coughing fit hit him, when it subsided his stomach was turning, he got up to get another mug of water and the room started to spin, he felt the acidic saliva build up in his mouth and the contents of his stomach emptied out of him. Just for a brief second he managed to notice that the liquid on the floor was a copperish red color, before it all went dark.

“You’ll never guess what cuddy is wearing toda- Wilson?” Whether House walked in at the right moment or not is up for debate, because he did probably save his life but oh boy is he not going to let go of the position that he found Wilson in, with his ass up and his face flat on the carpet.

He promptly walked out of Wilson's office and into his own. “Cutner, Taub. Go help Wilson in his office.” If you didn’t know House you’d probably think that he is an asshole for not immediately running to help his beloved friend. But letting someone else, someone more physically able, take care of Wilson while he figures out what’s wrong with him is the best thing he could do right now. “What’s the differential for vomiting blood and loss of consciousness? Go.” “Wait, is this about Wilson? Shouldn’t we help him?” “Yes, that’s why I sent Taub and Cutner there, and we can help him even more if we figure out what’s wrong with him. Symptoms! Go!” “Could be stomach cancer,” said Thirteen. “Or pancreatic.” added Foreman. "Or esophageal.” “Good test him for cancer markers.”

“Hi Thirteen." “Oh, you’re awake. That’s good. Just need to draw some blood.” “What are you testing me for?” There was a moment of silence. The air was thick and Wilson already knew the answer. “You’re looking for cancer. That would be ironic. Spent my entire life fighting it just to end up dying from it.” “It might not be it. We’re just exploring all the possibilities.” “Yeah, yeah, I know how it goes. I’ve done this a million times.” “Has House visited you?” “No he hasn’t. And he probably won't, at least I hope that he doesn’t, because that would mean that he gave up on me.”

There isn’t much that you can do in a situation like this except sit around and pray that it isn’t the worst.

“It’s negative for all cancer markers.” The atmosphere in House’s office is gloom. The lights are off with the exception of his desk lamp. House caught his ball that he was playing with and looked up at Thirteen. “We need to biopsy. Tell Chase to get the OR ready.”

During the operation the whole team was anxiously waiting in their office. Altho they didn’t talk to or interact with Wilson all that much they still cared about him. Whether it’s because of the proximity of having their offices share a wall or because he was their bosses best friend, it doesn’t seem to matter. So when Case finally walked into their office they shot out of the seats and House came in from his, where he was locked for basically the whole day.

“Did any of you check his stomach before you ordered the biopsy?” “No, we just checked his blood for cancer markers.” answered Thirteen. “It wasn’t cancer. It’s just some peptic ulcers.” with that he left.

There was a stunned silence that was broken by- “YOU IDIOTS! You didn’t check his stomach!?” “You just told us to run a blood panel” “I’m not talking about you! I’m talking about those two idiots who don’t know that when you check in a patient with GI issues the first thing you do is look into their stomach!” “We’re so sorr-” Taub didn’t manage to finish his sentence because House was already out the door on his way to Wilson.

When Wilson woke up after his surgery, the first thing he saw was a pair of extremely blue eyes staring right into his soul… but lovingly? “How are you feeling?” “Good. Like I was hit by a bus... so is it cancer?” “No. It’s just an ulcer. They got it fixed right away.” He breathed a sigh of relief. But he had one more question on his mind. “Then why did I pass out?” “Your body was too weak to handle the strain of vomiting. You weren’t eating enough lately because it felt like something was chewing through your stomach, which it was.” “So I just take some pills and I’ll be fine.” “A while of IV nutrition first but after that,” Wilson felt House's hand on his and he intertwined their fingers with a relaxed smile. “,yeah. You’ll be fine.”

Bonus:

After Wilson gets off the IV and can eat regular food, House always makes sure that he eats a few times a day and asks if he has any symptoms to make check that the ulcer isn't coming back.

If they are hanging out at House’s place, he cooks food for him that won’t upset his stomach.

[all-pacas]

DIAGNOSTIC OLYMPICS, SEASON 1, EPISODES 15-END

part one, part two

Hi! I was curious about who on House (besides House) gets the most diagnoses right. Other folks have already run a tally (it's Chase), but I was curious how other factors would influence the tally — whose ideas get run with, who manages treatment, who screws up… So I thought I'd keep score.

1 point for getting the answer. This is almost always going to be House.

.5 points for Valuable Contribution — stuff that isn't the final answer, but either is thought to be the final answer or is valuable to the solving of the case. Stuff like "noticing something on the MRI" doesn't count; things like "figuring out how to treat" does.

-.5 to -1 for Mistakes — stuff that delays or prevents diagnoses, injuring or killing patients, etc.

HEAVY DIAGNOSES: Cushing’s

+1 House: Figures out it’s Cushing’s. Another episode more about Vogler than medicine.

+0 Chase: Is super gross and awful about the patient all episode, complains non-stop, and is in his Peak Rat Era, but he still works his ass off and doesn’t let it show when in the room with the patient. Probably because he's more worried about getting fired, but. Compare to Foreman in the Rabies episode, who dismissed and refused to look at the patient. It's not a high bar.

ROLE MODEL DIAGNOSES: Epstein-Barr

+1 House: everyone is super busy with drama, but House figures out the case in his spare time. COINCIDENCE STRIKES AGAIN: Chase, for the third time, accidentally says the right diagnosis immediately, only to be shot down because it made no sense at the time. This time he points out he got it right, but House is also right that when he said it it was dumb.

BABIES AND BATHWATER DIAGNOSES: Lung cancer

+1 Team: The patient is diagnosed very quickly; the conflict of the episode is much more about keeping both her and her baby alive. Which, uh. -5 Vogler: Crossing from interfering jerk into “actively killing people,” his stunt with the C-section killed the patient. He could have pulled her from the trial without stopping the delivery. Hope the husband sues!

KIDS DIAGNOSES: Pregnancy

+1 House: Realizes the patient is pregnant, and from there it all falls into place. +.5 Chase: Despite House doing his best to punish him all episode, he comes up with a way to scan the patient without a CT. This is also the second time he’s figured out how to do something with “old fashioned” tech — first x-raying the ham worms in the pilot, and now using an ultrasound to scan a brain. Did he go to med school in the 1950s?

LOVE HURTS DIAGNOSES: Infection under jaw

+1 House: Figures it out fairly quickly once he realizes the tic-tacs are a clue. -.5 Chase: Hiding his knowledge of the patient being into S&M was very much a good move when it comes to workplace bullying, but could have led to delays in treatment/diagnosis. Luckily, not five minutes later, the truth is revealed anyway. -5 COOL POINTS: Chase attempting to dom the patient was terrifying. Why do we give him shit for kissing the 9 year old when this is so much more cringe? +1 Annette: Cares about Harvey, does everything she can to help him, doesn't give up trying to help and support him. Nice to see her portrayed as a caring person and not just Sexy Dom Lady.

THREE STORIES DIAGNOSES: N/A. But also, -5 to House's backstory doctors.

HONEYMOON DIAGNOSES: Intermittent porphyria

+1 House: As is usual for season finales, it is not so much about the medicine. Mark Warner is sick, no one has any idea or good guesses, and the fellows mostly exist in the background for House’s development with Stacy.

FINAL S1 TALLY:

HOUSE: 16.5 TEAM: 4 FOREMAN: 1 CHASE: 2.5 CAMERON: 2.5

Foreman's low score surprised me, but he tends to swing from "being really brilliant" to "being very unprofessional." He does well, but also gets demerits for his mistakes. He gets the most focus and character development, and that's only going to continue next season; I'm pretty sure he's going to pull ahead of the pack at some point.

Cameron essentially tying for second surprised me, because I remember her pulling a lot of dramatic stunts (spoilers, she doesn't start S2 strong), but she actually doesn't make a lot of mistakes that pull her score down. Sort of a "slow and steady" approach. She also, so far, is the only one to come up with a diagnoses (Wilson's Disease) on her own (even if House was only a second behind her).

Chase managed to guess the right diagnoses three times. He doesn't get credit, because they were guesses and he didn't seriously try to prove or fight for them, but it is interesting accidental foreshadowing. I do think Foreman was originally intended to be "House's successor," but there really is a decent case to be made, even in S1, that Chase has a shot.

Not much to say about House; his score is always going to be the highest, particularly in episodes more focused on character drama than "solving the mystery."

[eliotquillon]

meta ask: do you think cameron ever told chase about joe? how does he feel when even the angelic husband didn’t manage to keep her love?

anon this is crazy i was just about to ask people to send me more meta asks. our minds. where do you wanna hold the wedding.

jokes aside…HMM. the cynic in me wants to say no—obviously we only ever see her telling wilson this information, but iirc house never alludes to it either, and if he had known then he 100% would’ve made SOME kind of comment about (even if it was just to throw it in her face while he was detoxing, or say something to chase post-divorce about how things were doomed). foreman clearly doesn’t know either, because he tells her that cameron only ever got the honeymoon period and got to keep her first marriage on a pedestal. so this is clearly far, far more sensitive than the dead husband thing (which cameron does initially keep on lock, but is common enough knowledge by s3 for cameron’s homeless patient in 3x12 to overhear the nurses talking about it). and cameron sits on the sperm bomb until ridiculously late in the relationship, so it’s not like there isn’t precedent for her withholding information about her first marriage from chase, especially when it’s information that she suspects he won’t take well—and chase wouldn’t take this well imo, he has abandonment issues for days. i’m sure he’d be compassionate to her face about it, but it likely would plant a seed of concern internally. and cameron is someone who prides herself on having a good read on people; this is probably something she would herself predict. that said…

i want to believe the answer is yes, she did tell him. both because i am forever fighting for my life as a camchase ‘shipper’ (using this word loosely), but also because like…she told WILSON. it’s like when i was writing meta for time loop fic and mentioned that cameron tells wilson about the time loop before she tells chase and everyone in my notes was like ‘WHAT’ except this is way more serious and also canon (my writeup on wilson and cameron’s dynamic is another post for another day). but i think this was definitely something she told him LATE into the relationship. most likely just after they were married—possibly even as a result of him drawing away from her after dibala (she tries to be vulnerable with him as a way of encouraging him to tell her what’s going on). because this would add such a fascinating dimension to chase’s u-turn decision to dig his heels in and stay in princeton once he realises that cameron doesn’t really recognise what he’s done, doesn’t really forgive him for it because she doesn’t believe it’s his fault. if she could develop feelings for someone else during her first relationship with her perfect, dying husband, then surely the writing is on the wall for chase no matter what he does.

and obviously the KEY part of cameron’s disclosure is that she never acted on those feelings—you can’t control your feelings, wilson tells her, to which she responds, just your actions—that she never would’ve been able to live with herself if she’d done anything, but i think for chase the emotional aspect matters far more than the physical aspect anyway. it’s why he occasionally gets so caught on cameron having had past feelings for house; realistically, there’s nothing to be jealous of! they had the most chaste, trainwreck sham of a date in the world! house shut that shit down! but the emotional side of it was there, at least for cameron, and that’s what chase cares about. so again, while i think chase would be perfectly capable of having the logical response to cameron telling him—it was natural, he was a shoulder to cry on during the worst time of her life, her husband probably would’ve wanted her to have had some happiness—that definitely wouldn’t have been the ONLY thing he thought about it. ironically enough, i think he probably would’ve handled it better if she told him while they were just friends and way before anything happened between them, but i don’t think she ever would’ve done that.

anyway. i guess my copout answer to this is ‘i can see it either way’, but i lean towards ‘yes she told him, but NOT at a good time’ lol. they were together for three years, after all. i want chase to be normal about it but realistically…he would not have been.

[delinquentbookworm]

thinking about an episode of House MD set in a DnD universe.

So, the patient comes in with nausea, vomiting and weight loss, and the ER healer figures it's some kind of flu-type illness and gives the patient a Lesser Restoration. It doesn't work, which is weird, because Lesser Restoration should eliminate any disease.

So they call in House, who sends his team to get a patient history. And in the patient history, Cameron finds out that the patient recently pissed off a wizard, and when she mentions that to House, House is like "the wizard obviously cursed him. Do Remove Curse."

(While this is going on, the B plot is Wilson is having an ethical dilemma over whether he should help treat a vampire who kills people. House is on the side of 'we treat everyone, regardless of how many people they kill', whereas Wilson is like 'if I save this person's life am I dooming their future victims?')

Back to Cameron, Chase and Foreman - they're telling the patient they're gonna do Remove Curse, and the patient doesn't want them to, but he won't tell them why. Cameron doesn't want to cast the spell if the patient doesn't want it, but Chase is like "that's probably just the curse talking," and casts it anyway. But oh no! That makes the patient worse, and he goes into death saves. Foreman casts Spare the Dying and stabilises the patient, but he's still unconscious and can't answer any more questions.

House is like "you idiots, why didn't you tell me he didn't want the curse removed?" and sends them to break into the patient's house. They find a bunch of calendars that very clearly mark each full moon, and it turns out that the patient had lycanthropy. Remove Curse removed his lycanthropy, turning him back into a regular human - lowering his hit point maximum and his constitution, making his other condition worse. So maybe the patient was under the effect of Lycanthropy and a wizard's curse? Cameron tries Remove Curse again, and nothing happens. The patient is still unconscious and needs Spare the Dying to be cast on him pretty regularly.

So now obviously the answer is to get the patient re-infected with lycanthropy, because otherwise he's going to be stuck in a loop of unconsciousness -> death saves -> spare the dying -> unconsciousness.

So House asks Foreman to go track down another werewolf to bring in to bite the patient, and that's a whole thing. While that's happening, Cameron is trying to figure out what the wizard did, because it had to be something, right? No one gets into a fight with a wizard and then falls ill a day later and those two things not be related. And she's running a bunch of tests for various poisons or spells and they're all coming up negative.

Foreman brings in a werewolf. When the werewolf sees that the patient isn't conscious and can't actively consent to being bitten, they don't want to go through with it. House bullies them into it by implying that the patient dying would be their fault if they don't.

So the patient wakes up and is a werewolf again, but then the second werewolf gets sick too with all the same symptoms. Whatever it is contagious, but no one else feels sick, so it's passed on by bite only.

Cameron finally tracks down the wizard and brings them in like "you need to dispell whatever you cast" and the wizard is insisting they didn't cast anything. Cameron asks what the fight was even about in the first place, and the wizard tells her that when the patient was in his wolf form, he lost control, broke into the wizard's garden, and ate their pet rabbits. Cameron asks if the pet rabbits had the same symptoms the patient first exhibited, and the wizard confirmed they did. So then they're looking for something contagious that passes from animals to humanoids via the consumption of meat that is neither a disease nor a curse nor poison.

Cut back to House and Wilson, who are still talking about whether Wilson should treat this vampire. And House is saying something like "we treat bad people all the time, just because this one is a parasite doesn't mean -" and stops mid-sentence and sprints to the patient's room (which is now housing both werewolves) and announces that the first patient got sick with intestinal worms after eating the rabbit, which got passed onto the second werewolf when they bit him. Parasites aren't affected by Remove Curse or Lesser Restoration, which is why their earlier efforts didn't do anything. Now they know what it is, they can brew up some potions and heal them both. House makes a few insensitive jokes about them being werewolves and telling them they should go to a vet's next time, and then limps away.

Cut back to Wilson, who has offered up his own blood to the vampire to try and prevent them killing anyone else when they get hungry.

Roll credits. Tune in next week to find out why a druid is stuck in Wild Shape! (Spoiler alert, they're high on cat nip and just don't want to turn back)

[whenceful]

AU where House is pregnant and everyone hears about it. House/Wilson/Cuddy but no one really knows they're together. All of House's past and current residents keep asking him about it and he gives all of them different explanations:

House to Masters, who had not asked: I’m pregnant

Masters: Congratulations?

House: You were so cute and I wanted one just like you

Masters: You’re having a girl?

House, scoffing: That’s very heteronormative of you! I’m sure a boy would be just as cute and unwaveringly honest and annoying as you are

Masters: …

Chase: Aren’t you like 40?

House: How dare you? That’s ageist. At least your less prettier half doesn’t judge me like this when she’s doing my prenatal appointments

Chase, who was being generous (he was fairly sure House was nearing 50): Cameron is doing your prenatals? Why?

Cameron, when Chase (and Foreman and Kutner and Thirteen and Taub and Adams and pretty much everyone who has ever worked for House) asks why she’s looking after House’s prenatals: House kind of forced me into it. 

Chase: But you’re not a gynaecologist

Cameron: That’s what I told House! He said that I was better than all of them because I used to work for him.

Chase: I’m sure it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that everyone in gynaecology hates him

Foreman to Cameron: So House is actually pregnant?

Cameron: You think I’d do prenatals for a fake baby?

Foreman: I didn’t think you’d do prenatals for any kind of baby, seeing as you’re not actually an OB-GYN

Cameron: Can I go back to work now?

Foreman: I thought it was some kind of prank on Wilson or Cuddy

Cameron: So did I, but they’re both away on some conference so I’m not even sure if they know

Foreman: This is so weird

Thirteen, who has already deduced the answer: Whose the dad

House: That’s very sexist of you, Thirteen! This is the 21st century! We can do anything! 

Thirteen: Including asexual reproduction

House: I prefer the term parthenogenesis

Thirteen: Like a reptile?

House: That’s the spirit!

Adams, glad that House didn’t ask her to look after his prenatals: I didn’t know you wanted kids

House: You know I didn’t but then Taub made it look so easy 

House: And I’m sure Cuddy will give me maternity leave

Adams: I’m sure you’ll make a great parent

House: I thought i taught you to lie better than that

Taub, to Cameron: House is actually pregnant?

Cameron, tired of being accosted by everyone at PPTH and just trying to do her job: ….Yes?

Taub: And the baby is real?

Cameron: Yes?

Taub: When is House due?

Cameron, who just wants to go home: I can’t discuss my patient with you

Taub: ….

Taub: Since when does House care about doctor-patient confidentiality

Cameron: He may not, but I do, especially when it gets me out of conversations like this

House to Foreman: Rachel wanted a sister

Foreman: I’m sure that Cuddy will be overjoyed to adopt your baby

House: That hurts, you know. Families come in all shapes and sizes

Foreman: So this baby is going to be Cuddy’s daughter’s sister through delusion

House, mockingly: I wonder if delusion is a shape or a size

Kutner, vaguely disappointed that House didn’t ask him to look after his prenatals: My friend is a gynaecologist at Princeton General

House: When you say friend, do you mean a real person? People on the internet lie. Surprisingly a lot more than people in real life

Kutner: I went to med school with him

Kutner: And why surprisingly

House: Ugh, everyone knows that male gynaecologists are just perverts. Someone on the internet told me that

Kutner: Is that why you didn’t ask me to do your prenatals?

House, gravely: You don’t have Cameron’s bedside manner

Wilson, back from his conference: House, why did my assistant just ask me if i fathered your baby?

House: Because there’s a bet going around on the parentage of my baby

Wilson: You’re pregnant

House: No, but I like making money

Wilson: You made up a pregnancy just to win money from a bet about the pregnancy?

House: I also want maternity leave

Wilson: Of course you do

(it takes Wilson a month to realise that House is actually pregnant)

Cuddy: And here I thought you were too old to have a baby

Cuddy: I suppose congratulations are in order

House: For you and me both

Cuddy: What

House: If you adopt this baby

Cuddy: What

House: Foreman thinks that this baby can’t be rachel’s sister because they’re unrelated 

Cuddy, jokingly: Why did I let you hire such a close-minded fellow?

Cuddy: It’s a girl?

House, in mock-disappointment: So heternormative of you

House to Park: I wanted Wilson to spend more time with me

Park: But you live together

House: He works such long hours

Park: At the same hospital as you

House: I miss him

Park: Sure

House: Can’t a guy get pregnant so another guy hangs out with him more often. Platonically, of course

Park: Of course

Cameron: I’m not doing a c-section

House: I would assume that handling a patient’s prenatals means handling their births as well

Cameron: I can get Chase to do it

House: What does he have that you don’t have 

Cameron: A board certification as a surgeon?

House: Any idiot can become a surgeon

Cameron, calling his bluff: If it’s so easy, why don’t you just do it yourself

House: I fully plan on getting all the good drugs

House: It’s why i’m having this baby, you know

Cameron, not backing down: I’ve never done a c-section. Chase has probably done hundreds

House, mockingly: Will you hold my hand at least?

Cameron: I thought that was what Wilson was for

House: I have two hands

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 8 Matsuribayashi pt. 23

I don’t know about the idea of skimming over some of these fragments. They’re all generally important to the overarching narrative, and they’re usually pretty short. Ones like the Ooishi one I guess I could sum up pretty concisely, but I kind of want you to experience it the way that I did. The only difference being I don’t know if I can instill the small feeling of dread that I began to feel midway through the fragments. Dread because of the fact that I was actively enjoying the story as it was being presented by these fragments, and all. But because I was enjoying it, I became paranoid that eventually something would happen to put an end to my enjoyment and drag the chapter down. Would you believe me when I say I do genuinely recommend this series?

The old guy continued

Fun fact, this was actually supposed to be contained entirely within the last part, but I hit the screenshot limit without meaning to, so now The old guy is a split part.

I know that the entire purpose of this fragment is to firmly cement Ooishi’s motivation and grudge against the Sonozaki family. But at the same time it’s just a bit of a skipper.

And that’s how the fragment ends with Ooishi declaring war on anyone who has the last name Sonozaki in his community.

One of the things I didn’t catch for whatever reason upon reading the fragment featuring the manager of the dam constructions death the first, second, or somehow even the third time, was the fact that the manager was the one who instigated the deadly dispute. That he’s the one who flew into a rage, swinging his shovel to attack the construction guys, which led to his demise. Somehow it just didn’t register until I was reading the fragment again for entirely unrelated reasons that it clicked that he was ultimately his own undoing. More to that point, do you suppose the foreman himself was infected with Hinamizawa Syndrome? Or was it the stress of the dam war that led to his fatal fight?

This somewhat recolors Ooishi’s revenge plot, as he is entirely unaware that it was the foreman who led to his own downfall much less the Sonozakis.

The first sacrifice

With this particular fragment we really start delving deeper into some of the larger unanswered mysteries from the series. Answers, are ahead, in this the final chapter of the Answer Arcs.

I wonder why Irie is skeptical of the random chance encounter Takano had with this guy? It hasn’t come up yet in the fragments that he’s suspicious of her research into Hinamizawa Syndrome, so I just wonder why he doubts her. Would it be better for him if she had for whatever reason had the Mountain Dogs or herself stalking this guy on the off-chance he had the terminal levels they need? Does he think Takano and the Mountain Dogs are just cruising around Hinamizawa in their van ready to abduct everyone who might fit the bill? Do you think they use the Okonogi Gardeners van as their kidnapping van?

I might be misremembering, but wasn’t it implied in Onikakushi the other five guys who were compelled into this dismemberment plot dumped their body parts that day? Could you imagine if they decided to do it just a day at a time? What I want to know is what poor bastard had head, or torso disposal duty? That must’ve really sucked for them, at least if I was forced to dispose of a random body part I’d rather get an arm or a leg.

Also, I kind of like the implication that Irie has performed amputations in the past.

The line “I need a medical sacrifice” is such a wonderfully deranged line. Clearly this line of thinking disturbs Irie, but it just really encapsulates his character pretty well I think. He’s done this before, he has willingly dirtied his hands to try to solve the issues with the human brain, but as the passage of time makes people rethink former crazy and harmful individuals he’s having difficulty reconciling with his past. Perhaps it’s a societal thing, the outrage and furor over his previous actions of performing lobotomies without consent instilled him with a feeling of doubt about the correctness of his actions.

I don’t think that Irie’s worries about Takano’s safety are genuine, not fully at least. He might on a subconscious level worry that she might get hurt, but I think he’s really just feeling trepidation over her tests, and the idea that they’re really going to dissect this mans brain while he’s alive.

I love this problematic woman.

I don’t know if manliness is really the problem here. I really do think he’s just being affected by the societal views about the ethics of his research in the past versus the present.

Something that I find odd about all of this is how despite the dam project being shut down in late 1978 to early 1979 is that the ministry of construction kept the foreman on the job. Was he just there to keep an eye on whatever equipment was still on site? Furthermore, why did it take a year for the construction worker to snap and murder him? Was he somehow able to naturally suppress his Hinamizawa Syndrome despite being an L5 terminal patient when he did the deed?

[hazardous-who]

I really enjoy how u portray Kakashi's depression but also how nameless u are with the rest of the clear mental issues he struggles with in To Lose, do u have any specific inspiration with it and do u have any advice for someone who's struggling to describe depression in their own fic without just going "Oh he's depressed"? Love ur fic btw!!!

My inspiration? I'm sorry to say, but it's myself. My beta also suffers with depression, so they're my other end of the tunnel with trying to vocalize feelings since we have vastly different ways to describe and even process things. I'm glad you enjoy my portrayal though, and when it comes to the rest of his 'clear mental issues' as you described, I especially prefer to keep it lacking on naming anything specific so that viewers can make their own connections or theories. Otherwise, I've made it very clear from Kakashi's POV that he has made it a point to not see anyone for help, leaving him and you, the reader, unknown to what's truly going on with him without a proper diagnosis present, though there's something definitely wrong. Speculation is just as fun as a direct answer, if not more in my opinion. When it comes to describing depression, rather than like you said, just saying 'he's depressed' I try to show as much in thought or action. Not everyone has the same reactions, but for me personally, I get drained with the simplest task, even doing things that I love such as talking with others can leave me dropping through the floor. Sometimes it comes in the form of feeling like I'm sick to my stomach or incredible fatigue while other times it's the inability to will myself out of bed- even getting myself to drink a glass of water can be hard. So I'd personally start with describing your character taking what most people may think is a 'simple' action and portraying it with how your character feels with completing the task. Example: One person may see a four step process in making coffee- Fill with water, add grounds, brew, add to cup. Another person can see a twelve step situation- pick up the pot, fill it with water, fill up the coffee maker's tank, put the pot back, find the coffee grounds, get the filters for the pot, put both in, turn it on, wait, get your cup, get any additional thing such as cream, sugar, and a spoon to mix it. So on so forth, you've just extended a process and made it feel so much more exhausting to consider- bam, you just related to someone who probably didn't make coffee this morning because it felt like too much of a hassle. You can do this with a lot of things, such as going into habits such as eating and thus start to portray your character's eating disorders being linked to depression, etc, but doing research about such things is always a good idea. You'll see me do this a lot in Lose/Gain when it comes to describing the hard time Kakashi has with keeping his own space clean or how difficult eating is because -making- the food is too much of a hassle, thus why something as easy as instant mixes or cans of soup hit better with him ( Thanks Kurenai ! ) Another thing is how having some form of reward or 'I'm being watched/expected to do this' system can meanwhile be a kicker to get your character to work, even having another character essentially acting as foreman can help be an easy way to still keep them motivated to do something. Again with Lose/Gain, I do this with Kakashi's job, taking care of Konohaven because it's an obligation for someone other than himself, etc, as well as the expectation of other's such as Guy or Kurenai ( Obito too of course, though his 'motivation' comes with a far different territory and being expunged from this example. ) Hopefully just these explanations of my personal process gives you a little help and some insight on how to tackle any fics ! Thank you for reading, also sorry for the block of text, as I've warned across my blog, I really can't shut up to save my life.

[beeseverywhen]

White collar workers

When I started work as a civil servant at the London Passport Office 22 years ago I made the terrible mistake of believing I was going up in the world. I arrived at work wearing my best suit (in fact it was my only suit). I got the shock of my life: everyone else was wearing jeans. I ended up being assigned to a huge office, where half the people opened letters all day and the others stuffed envelopes. My job was to stamp the passports with a huge brass embossing machine all day long. I was part of a clerical production line.

The nature of white collar jobs has changed massively over the last 100 years. Clerical workers in the 19th century were regarded as middle class. Their pay, status and even dress made them more akin to managers. A clerical post was seen as a prized job and was usually a lifetime post. It was also a job that required a high level of skill. Very few clerical workers see themselves as that today.

The growth of white collar jobs throughout the last century has been accompanied by a huge growth in the number of women workers. Over the last 40 years office work has become increasingly deskilled and dependent on machinery. Work has become boring and repetitive. The introduction of costly technology (computers, faxes and photocopiers) has changed the pattern of work inside the office. A similar process has gone on in education, banking and local government.

One council housing worker described the drudgery of his work.

"We don’t have to clock in and out like my dad did when he worked in a factory. We now have a computer—I call it the hidden foreman. It is used by management to record and monitor how much work we do. It knows what time I start work, what time I finish, how long it takes me to have a piss. It monitors the number of telephone calls I answer and at a flick of a switch a supervisor can increase the pace of our work."

Investment in machines means that white collar jobs are no longer nine to five. White collar workers are expected to do shift work. Many offices are now open 24 hours a day. Certainly, in terms of pay, a routine clerical worker is part of the working class. A low-grade civil servant earns around £17,000 a year—no more than a manual car worker at Fords does. The growth of a large layer of middle management has accompanied this growth in white collar jobs.

Today the myth that white collar workers are not part of the working class remains as strong as ever. Yet unionisation levels and strikes in this sector refute this myth. The drive to attack the working conditions, skills levels and pay of white collar workers over the last 30 to 40 years has been accompanied by a growth of trade unions in the public sector. Figure 3 below shows the gross weekly pay scales of public sector workers. It demonstrates that the majority of white collar workers’ wages are comparable to manual workers’ wages. It also demonstrates that women workers are predominantly found in the lower paid jobs.

White collar workers such as office workers, many council workers and teachers make up a large section of Britain’s workforce. Today, they are some of the best-organised workers in the country (see Figure 2 above). Just as with their forefathers and mothers in the cotton mills, the mines and car plants, the growth of trade unionism in the white collar sector came about over a relatively long period and as a result of a number of disputes, strikes and campaigns.

Over the past 20 years Britain has witnessed a huge growth in call centres, there are approximately 850,000 workers currently employed in them. Some studies describe the workers in these centres as white collar workers and others as part of the service economy. But they are also commonly described as the new coal miners of the 21st century. If you read most reports in the media you would assume that these workers are completely atomised, have no power and face the constant fear of having their work outsourced to India or Romania. But again that is not a true picture. A series of recent studies shows that most of the companies which run these operations expect the number to keep on growing over the next few years, though not at quite the rate of a few years back. For every story about outsourcing to India, there is one about a new call centre being built in Britain, mostly ignored by the press. In fact a recent report in the Guardian notes that companies like Kwik-Fit Insurance and Powergen, who had outsourced their work to India, are now relocating back to the UK because they can’t find enough staff with the right level of technical skills and knowledge. Ironically, ICICI OneSource, a Mumbai-based outsourcing company, said it was building a new 1,000 person call centre in Belfast because of ‘its highly skilled workforce and relatively cheap property prices’.

Again expanding job opportunities and skills shortages in the industry are giving call centre workers the confidence to demand higher wages and better conditions. Last year I spoke to a call worker from Newcastle. He told me:

"There are five call centres on our industrial park. All of them are constantly advertising for trained staff. You end up meeting workers from other call centres in your lunch break in local cafes and pubs. Of course you find out who has the best hours and who gets the best rates of pay. All you have to do is ask your supervisor for a pay rise or a change in conditions. If they say no you just move to the next call centre across the road. There is a natural levelling up. It’s good old fashioned economics of supply and demand."

It’s also become clear that unions like the CWU, Amicus and Unison are now organising in some of these centres.

[the-hem]

The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard. From Matthew 20:1-16.

The Torah identifies something called a Skilled Worker, the only type that can enter, prepare and operate the Temple. Now, all of us are religious on this planet, all of us know we are not responsible for existence itself, that we are, in various ways taking advantage of something precious and magnificent in defiance of what God told our predecessors was essential for a certain future on this world.

We are buckling under the weight of our doubt and sin. We are unskilled. Psychopaths and freaks are running things and this is not of God. I am revealing these Parables to help us understand how broken our approach is because we donot understand religion, specifically, The Religion, the fishbone of all faiths, Judaism.

Everyone needs to become skilled at Judaism and understand everything the Torah says or life on earth will stop and it will not restart again.

Let's start with what it means to be a Skilled Worker and who the Employer happens to be.

"A tzaddik is an indentured employee, someone accustomed to following orders. He has never tasted independence, never been on his own. Though he honestly and industriously labors in G‑d's service, he has never felt the need to take a gamble, never felt the rush experienced by someone who goes out on a limb—he's always on the straight and steady."

Tzaddiks, or employees are not slaves, they do not work for nothing or in vain. They are the saints of Judaism, the ones that understand the most direct path to civilized life within society, the home and the workplace.

The Employer is the Torah.

How can any of you say you are God's Employee or employ religion in your life while this world suffocates, fries, starves, thirsts, and murders itself? How can you say you know God, and want to be of God while merciless indecent people show up on your ballots and then walk through their presidencies without a care or a damn for anything of value to the human race?

Nearly every child on earth reads the Torah but look at the savage adults they turn into without a single apology? Look at how you eat and dress and cavort yourselves. Do you see yourselves yet? How skilled are you really?

Here begins the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.

Note the parable is broken up by times of day rather than the Four Directions:

20 “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius[a] for the day and sent them into his vineyard.

3 “About nine in the morning he went out and saw others standing in the marketplace doing nothing. 4 He told them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.’ 5 So they went.

“He went out again about noon and about three in the afternoon and did the same thing. 6 About five in the afternoon he went out and found still others standing around. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’

7 “‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered.

“He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’

8 “When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.’

9 “The workers who were hired about five in the afternoon came and each received a denarius. 10 So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. 

11 When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. 

12 ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.’

13 “But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius?

 14 Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. 15 Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

16 “So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

Each section has a specific and separate meaning:

“For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius[a] for the day and sent them into his vineyard.

The Kingdom of Heaven requires the Crown, the Christ and the Subject, who is yoked to Him.

Morning is East, the moment something dawns upon us. As for the vineyard: it represents civilization doing what God said, producing something through collaboration that has no potential for violence or strife, every opportunity for illumination.

Hired workers do what they are told, they get a dividend: the denarius= "life's purposes" are revealed.

3 “About nine in the morning he went out and saw others standing in the marketplace doing nothing. 4 He told them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.’ 5 So they went.

Anything having to do with nine refers to gestation in the womb and the revelation of the Torah. It takes an entire human birth to know the Torah, it is best to get a head start.

Persons spending time in the marketplace, unemployed doing nothing are ripe for temptation. Jesus did not tolerate this and tells them they are meant for bigger and better things, "whatever is right." He tells them to leave Egypt and earn something important that will belong only to them.

If we follow the logic of the Parable, Jesus is telling them to be in front of their personal prosperities. The Gematria of 7887 yields זח‎חז‎, zahaz, "to be a seer or visionary."

חזה

The verb חזה (haza) means to see or behold. Noun חזה (hozeh) means seer or visionary. Nouns חזות (hazot), חזות (hazut), חזיון (hizzayon) and מחזה (mahazeh) mean vision, anything between the mere act of seeing to experiencing a prophetic apparition. The noun מחזה (meheza) literally describes a place or instrument of vision and is the word for window.

It may be that the verb חזה (haza) originated in the idea of being or looking forward, which would explain the noun חזה (hazeh), which describes the breast of an animal. It may also be that this noun derives from a second verb חזה (haza), to be in front.

“He went out again about noon and about three in the afternoon and did the same thing. 6 About five in the afternoon he went out and found still others standing around. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’

7 “‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered.

“He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’

While dawn is amazing, noon is better:

"we can see that, actually, the "sweet" or "light-filled" hours actually begin exactly at midnight and commence at high noon. That moment of transformation from when the harshest of spiritual forces of the daily clock dominate to the beginning of the shining of the light of the coming day takes place exactly at the midpoint of the night. Simply put, being awake and actively engaged in divine service from this time through the dawn allows us to tap into the incredible potential manifest by this spiritual phenomenon."

The five times of dawn 9, 12, 3, 5, are called APEST, a fivefold framework, or topology, is sometimes referred to as Apostle, Prophet, Evangelist, Shepherd and Teacher, all the types of Skilled Workers.

Each of them received a denarius and this cranked a few of them off, but Jesus said the work of each one contributes somehow to the completion of the work in the vineyard which adds knowledge and value to the concept of the soul.

As Jesus said, if one is standing there doing nothing, so is the soul. If one is at work in one of the capacities mentioned then one is earning value for the soul. What is the evidence of this?

The Gematria says strength of character and "ornaments for the clothes" are signs one has earned the denarius, from 16748, או‎‎זדח‎‎‎, ozadah:

The masculine noun עז ('oz), meaning strength (Isaiah 26:1, Psalm 8:2). This word is used primarily for God, particularly in the Psalms.

עדד

Root עדד ('adad) describes a repeated passing by or over, or a repeated encountering. Noun עדה ('idda) describes any well-worn item.

Verb עדה ('ada I) means to advance or pass on. Nouns עד ('ad) and ועד (w'ad) describe the difficult concept of a future era advancing upon the now, or else the prey or booty upon which a predator advances. The conjunction עד ('ad) or עדי ('ady) means "as far as" or until.

The same verb, namely עדה ('ada II) is used to mean to adorn or ornament oneself — that is: to have items approach the canvas of one's bulk in order to testify of some social rank or perhaps the trade or order one belongs to. Noun עדי ('adi) means ornamentation: fancy or declarative things worn on one's body or clothes.

The Ornaments separate us from the animules and they are found in Parsha Mattot:

Animals vs. Ornaments.

48 Then the officers who were over the units of the army—the commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds—went to Moses 49 and said to him, “Your servants have counted the soldiers under our command, and not one is missing. 50 So we have brought as an offering to the Lord the gold articles each of us acquired—armlets, bracelets, signet rings, earrings and necklaces—to make atonement for ourselves before the Lord.”

Gold is the color of enlightenment. Ornaments are reminders. Those made of gold are revisited from the Torah, and bind the limb or faculty to the principals contained there. They include:

Armlets: arms mobilize what happens in the head.

Bracelets/Wrists are for masturbating. Be sure to remember God and the Torah each time.

Actually bracelets reinforce what we are to desire and what we choose to take- weapons or instruments.

Signets are national tenets.

Earrings remind us what is appropriate to listen to.

Necklaces: remind us of what is proper to say.

Atonements therefore are made using the limbs, ears, mouth, etc. are done by reminding ourselves through study of the torahs, tzavs, edoms, etc.

Tefillin, boxes containing scrolls which are attached to leather bondage tape and wrapped around little kids, are prescribed for the same purposes...

The boxes represent the process of Chabad, as it doubles the various concepts of reality back in on itself within the mind, the leather bondage straps are the Devarim, which bind the mind to its tasks of analyzing the Instructions contained in the Torah.

Chief amongst the Ornaments is called Sukkoth, "self-esteem" which is different from Rameses, "self-aggrandizement.'

So, we work in the Vineyard for the purposes of the former, and not the latter. And when animal men are in charge, telling people to do weird things instead of their jobs, this is just not possible.

The same is true with regards to work. Work without pay is forbidden, and so is sacrifice without happiness.

Thus ends the Parable.

[thinkingaboutbetterdays]

a winning bet. ( robert chase x reader )

It was apparent to those who paid enough attention that Chase had feelings for you. Whenever he was distracted or particularly quiet during a diagnosis House would tease him about the 'sexy trauma surgeon,' and Chase would refrain from saying anything while Cameron and Foreman snickered. Neither could believe that you would ever date him.

Two months ago, neither did he, but here you were, enjoying lunch at a restaurant a short distance from the hospital. You covered your mouth as you laughed, placing your glass on the table.

Chase shook his head, "I'm serious! It's constant. I'm sick and tired of hearing about how we would never work out."

You took his hand, smiling softly. "We're working out great, aren't we? Who cares what other people think?"

Chase smiled slowly, "Well, yes, but - don't you think we should, you know? Tell people? It's been two months."

"Then they'll be cracking jokes and making innuendoes." You told him.

Chase moved his hand away, and you sighed when he sat straighter in his chair. "You don't want to tell them."

"Of course I do - "

"Then what's the problem?" He leaned forward, arms resting on the table.

"What if things don't work out? What if we let the world affect this little bubble, it bursts, and we hate each other? I don't want to hate you. I love you."

His eyes widened, a smile forming on his lips. It was the first time you had ever said I love you. And although he felt the same, he was worried that you wouldn't. House had a habit of getting into his head at the worst of times, and lately, he was living there rent-free.

"I love you too." He said, holding your hand. "And I want to be able to show it without the sneaking around."

You smiled bashfully, "I thought you were ashamed of me or something. I didn't want to lose this."

Chase looked at you seriously, "I would never be ashamed of you. And it was nice. Just us. But I want more." He squeezed your hand, and you smiled.

"Me too."

The following Monday, you entered the hospital, hand in hand, and you smiled when he kissed your hand, feeling your grip tighten due to the stares. "I'll see you at lunch." He told you. You smiled when he kissed your cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too." You headed in opposite directions, knowing that everyone would be gossiping about you and Chase within the hour. But as you changed into scrubs, you realized there was an even greater thrill in outing your relationship than hiding it. You knew every nurse who gawked over him daily was envious of you, but you knew they only cared about his looks. Chase saved everything else for you.

You looked up from your paperwork, your smile turning into a confused frown when House took your pudding. "I lost fifty bucks because of you."

Your eyebrows furrowed, looking at Chase for answers when he appeared. "They made bets on whether we got together or not."

You nodded, looking at House with a grin. "Only fifty?"

He glared at you, though you knew he was amused as he walked away. Chase shook his head as he sat down. "Do you want to go for dinner? It's on me." He held up at least a hundred and fifty in bills, a smirk on his lips.

"You bet on us too?"

"Yeah. After we got together." He said, making you laugh.

Chase smiled, pocketing the money and taking your hands across the table. "How about dinner, wine, and a movie?"

You smiled, "Perfect." You told him.

"Just like you."

"Cheeseball." You smiled when he kissed your hand, smiling fondly as you tried to remember what you had been so worried about before.

[ris-multi-fandom]

Here’s day 1 of Housevember22, it’s supposed to be an art thing but I can’t draw for shit so have a fic instead:

Fandom: House

Pairing: House x Wilson

Characters: Gregory House, James Wilson, Lisa Cuddy, Eric Foreman, Alison Cameron, Robert Chase

November 1st: Formal wear

“House! Are you nearly ready? We’re gonna be late! Cuddy said she wanted all the department heads at this fundraising event first!” Wilson shouted across the apartment that he shared with House.

“Just got to find the right cane to go with my outfit!” He heard house shout back. He walked through to the bedroom and chuckled as he saw a vast array of canes laying on the bed, “which one do you think brings out the colour in my eyes?” He asked fluttering his lashes at Wilson who just laughed slightly.

“You already know which cane you’re going to use, stop messing around,” Wilson grumbled, picking up a navy blue cane and handing it to the other man. The two walked over to the full length mirror that was on the wall.

“I think we’re going to have the best costumes there,” House commented as they looked at themselves. They were dressed up as Alexander Hamilton and John Laurens, of course the Musical adaptation of the two.

“I still don’t see how this is gonna let people know that we’re together, it’s not exactly the typical couple’s costume,” Wilson said.

“Oh please, those two men were very obviously in love, and if people don’t get it then they’re just too stupid to know,” Wilson rolled his eyes at House’s comment.

“C’mon, we’ve got to get going,” he told his boyfriend, before they both headed out of the door.

————

House and Wilson stepped through the doors of the hospital and stopped dead in their tracks, the entrance had been cleared out and the nurses station was turned into a bar but this wasn’t what had shocked them, they looked around the room and saw everyone else in tuxedos and fancy dresses.

“I thought you said this was a fancy dress party,” Wilson said.

“That’s what Cuddy told me,” House replied, “speaking of,” he trailed off as the woman in question headed over to them.

“What the hell are you two wearing?” She asked, she was smiling but both men could tell this was a front she was putting on, there was no mistaking the anger in her eyes.

“You told me that this was a fancy dress party,” House said.

“I told you to dress fancy, as in formal wear, not fancy dress!” She let some of her anger out before correcting her face to the smile she was putting on for the investors.

“Ohhh,�� both men sighed out in unison.

“As it’s near Halloween and House had told me it was fancy dress I just assumed it was some sort of Halloween party,” Wilson explained.

“For two of the smartest doctors I know, you’re both idiots,” Cuddy replied before walking off.

“You’re a dumbass,” Wilson said, “we’re gonna be the laughing stock of the hospital.”

“Don’t worry, I told Chase, Cameron and Foreman that it was fancy dress too,” House told him, “so at least we won’t be the only ones looking like idiots,” Wilson looked over to him and the two burst out laughing which drew many pairs of eyes to begin staring at them. Once they had stopped laughing they headed over to the makeshift bar and ordered a couple of drinks.

————

“So who are you meant to be?” House questioned Chase as he came in and joined him, Wilson, Foreman, who was dressed as a ghost buster, and Cameron, who came as Wonder Woman.

“No one else is in fancy dress,” Chase replied looking around.

“That doesn’t answer my question,” House said.

“I’m Steve Irwin,” the younger man told him, “Why is no one else in fancy dress?”

“Ah of course, an Aussie legend,” House exclaimed.

“We think house was messing with us but he won’t say for sure,” Cameron said.

“If he was messing with us he wouldn’t have come in fancy dress too,” Foreman retorted, “but what I want to know more is wether you two planned to wear the same costume or if it was accidental?”

“It’s not the same costume you idiot,” House rolled his eyes, “I’m Alexander Hamilton and Wilson is John Laurens.”

“Oh from that musical!” Cameron said.

“They’re not just from a musical, one was one of our founding fathers Cameron,” House replied.

“I know that, I’m just saying there’s now a popular musical about them,” she muttered.

“What’s with the couple’s costume anyway, something you’re trying to tell us?” Chase joked. Foreman and Cameron chuckled as well but the other two men didn’t say anything.

“Oh my God!” The three younger doctors exclaimed in unison as the other two men looked at them and smiled.

“So you’re not messing with us?” Foreman asked.

“Nope,” Wilson replied.

“How long have you two been together?” Chase questioned.

“About 6 months,” House answered.

“The costumes make so much more sense now!” Cameron gasped out, “There’s been a lot of debate about wether Hamilton and Laurens were in love with each other because of some letters between the two.”

“See someone gets it!” House yelled out, startling a few people around them. Foreman and Chase were still in shock when Cuddy came to join them.

“Ok, who’s coming to dance with me?” She asked, they all looked at her with an eyebrow raised, “I have been having to keep investors amused since I got here and I need a break, only way to do that is to seem busy, so who’s coming to dance?” They all looked at each other and Cuddy rolled her eyes, “Foreman, you’ve drawn the short straw, let’s go.”

“But I’m not a very good dancer,” he protested.

“Too bad, you were closest so now you’re my dance partner, let’s go,” Foreman considered arguing but gave in instead. “I expect to see the rest of you on that dance floor too,” Cuddy looked at them, Chase and Cameron got up and headed to the dance floor.

“My leg’s in a lot of pain tonight,” House told her and she just let out a huff before walking away, Foreman following close behind.

“So you don’t want to dance with me?” Wilson asked.

“Did you want to dance?” House queried.

“Well it’s one way to let the whole hospital know that we’re together,” Wilson commented.

“That’s true,” House considered, “alright,” he said, suddenly standing up, “but you might have to help me get to the dance floor, not very easy to dance with a cane in your hand,” Wilson smiled at him and stood up, he held out his elbow and House linked arms with him. They made their way to the dance floor as a slow song began to play, they wrapped their arms around each other and swayed to the music. House was looking past Wilson and the shorter man raised an eyebrow.

“What are you looking at?” Wilson asked.

“Cuddy, she’s staring at us with a look of shock on her face, I think Foreman might have broken the news to her,” House grinned. Wilson lifted his hand and guided House’s face so he was looking at him.

“Why don’t we give her something to really stare at?” He said, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“And what do you suggest?” House asked. Wilson put his hand behind Houses neck and pulled his face to his. Their lips found each other and they shared a passionate kiss in front of their coworkers. They thought to themselves about the sight they must have been, two middle aged men in fancy dress making out in the middle of a dance floor filled with important people in their formal wear. When they separated they could feel other people’s eyes on them but that didn’t bother them, they continued to dance and look into each other’s eyes, grinning to themselves, they knew that they would remember this moment forever.

[warsofasoiaf]

Please share some Soviet Union jokes.

Not a problem. There were plenty of great jokes from throughout the Soviet Union. Perhaps the oldest one, told from 1917 to 1991, was the classic standby: "They pretend to pay us, we pretend to work." Here's a couple of my favorite more long-form ones.

***

There was a fire at the KGB building in Arkhangelsk, and most of the building burns down, only the front desk is left, but the phone still works. The desk gets a call and an officer answers.

"Hello, is this the KGB?" asks the man over the phone.

"Yes it is, comrade," the officer answers, "but I'm afraid the KGB has burned down." The officer then hangs up the phone. Two minutes later, the phone rings again.

"Hello, is this the KGB?" comes the voice over the phone, it's the same voice as before.

"Ah comrade, perhaps the damage made it hard to hear, the KGB has burned down." The officer answers before hanging up again. Another two minutes pass, phone rings again, it's the same guy.

"Comrade, are you deaf? I said that the KGB has burned down!" The officer shouts.

"I know," came the voice over the phone, "I just like hearing it."

***

A man is sentenced to the gulag, and at this particular camp, the zeks (gulag inmates) have a tradition - one inmate will always like to make the joke: "How long will you be staying with us?" Sure enough, when the man is brought into the courtyard to meet the rest of the camp, and they ask the question.

"Oh, I was sentenced to ten years," the new arrival answers.

"Oh, what did you do?" the first inmate asks.

"Nothing, I didn't do anything," the new arrival offers.

"Don't lie to me, nothing only gets you five years!"

***

A drunk is in Red Square, screaming at the top of his lungs: "Brezhnev durak! Brezhnev durak! (Brezhnev is a fool!)" When the police finally booked him, they gave him thirty days for drunk and disorderly...and ten years for leaking state secrets.

***

A factory foreman is giving a presentation to the Chairman of the State Planning Commission of the Soviet Union, who has been told that this is the most productive factory in the entire Soviet Union.

"Ah, comrade Chairman, it is a great year. In the time of the tsar, we produced only 500 units. Last year, we produced 2,000 units. This year, we are on track to produce 3,000 units!" The foreman proudly exclaims.

The Chairman is overjoyed to hear it. "You are truly a model for the entire Soviet Union. Tell me comrade, what do you make?"

The foreman happily says: "Excuses, comrade!"

***

Gorbachev actually told this joke on an American talk show during his visit - it isn't hard to see why he was absolutely beloved in the United States and charmed everyone he met during his trip to the USA.

Because of Gorbachev's anti-alcoholism campaign, the lines for vodka were very long. Two men are standing in the queue, increasingly getting fed up with the wait, when one of them shouts: "This is intolerable! I'm going to the Kremlin right now to kill Gorbachev! Hold my place!"

The man leaves and comes back in an hour. His friend asks him: "So did you do it? Did you kill Gorbachev?"

The man sighs. "No...the queue there was even longer."

***

Thanks for the question, Publius. Hopefully you and everyone who read them got a good chuckle out of it.

SomethingLikeALawyer, Hand of the King