#how does that happen. i didnt even start it day of and yet

[crystalpallette]

"Huh? Which one did I like best?"

happy birthday to the girl who started it all!! arle nadja my beloved darling I wish you only the best and only the spiciest of curries on your special day. I'm sorry I couldnt integrate curry into this piece

[acquiescest]

irt the lrb what would you say if i said liam & noel spent new years 2023 together in paris

what would you say if i said liam bought the house in france (the one with noel's name carved into the walls) in march 2023 and that month noel talked about wanting to spend several months in paris

which could mean nothing

[inmirova]

"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(

[venomgender]

required reading .

[iifoundjoy]

BEAR WITH ME.

warning: spoilers for ep 75

i was just scrolling through tiktok and then the thought occurred to me that everyone grew up together (minus ben and aiden) and basically never interacted until the group project. yeah, duh, that's the whole premise of their strange group at first, but it just strikes a cord to think that these kids who have become so inseparable were so close to each other this whole time without even knowing it, without even knowing that they needed each other.

because why now, after all these years, would they? after all, they were just strangers who occasionally saw each other in the hall or during class, strangers that they could never understand, right? they were just too different.

i mean, just think about how taylor says she's always noticed ashlyn since they were kids and how she was always on her own. she didnt understand how ash could be content with that, isn't it lonely?

tyler is most likely, lets face it, pretty popular. when we're introduced to him and taylor they're in this huge group of typical jocks due to tyler being on the baseball team. ashlyn and logan must've known him before due to that, seen them parading through the halls. and seeing as how neither logan nor ash like loud noises or crowds very much they probably wrote him off as a loud jock and went about their day. maybe saw how cold and angry he was with everyone but his sister and thought he must be unpleasant to be around.

as for logan, he, like ash, is pretty obviously very much a background character in everyone else's lives. most likely a loner just like ashlyn, very shy. if the rest of the gang ever noticed him it was probably nothing more than a glance. because logan at the time was nothing more than barrons stereotypical nerd that does his homework because he's scared of what will happen if he doesn't.

it just makes me ILL that these people who would grow to care so much about each other were all so close without knowing it, hell, they probably passed each other in their towns grocery store multiple times before. maybe seen tyler play in one of his games with taylor yelling above everyone else because that's her brother, saw ashlyn perform and dance, saw logan reading in the astronomy section in the library.

and yet they didn't know they'd ever learn to trust these strangers with their lives every night. that they would learn that tyler is more than just a loud, angry jock. he loves and cares about his sister, took up being basically a parent from a very young age, and doesn't truly have any friends because they are just a distraction.

that taylor is every bit as friendly as she let's others believe, but if you mess with her brother or her friends that sun can cloud over so quick.

that ashlyn likes to be alone but given the time and patience, she would love to be alone with you. that she doesn't want to, but if she's needed, she will step up and be the leader you need. sure, she isn't good at "friends" and she'll make mistakes, but she owns up to them because she tries and she cares.

and finally, logan, who at first is so shy and unsure, yet is quick-witted and brave enough to make hard choices and learn where he fits in with a group. to stand up against someone who bullied him and threatened him daily and help someone else from going down the same path he did.

AND PLEASE don't even get me started on ben and aiden.

those two have been practically alone their whole lives until they met each other. all aiden had was the dark room that reeked of molding food and people he hung around just to pass the time because he knew they weren't permanent, nothing ever was with his parents.

and ben's only friend before aiden being the music he could create before it was taken away from him, and all he had left was the broken melodies that he tried to find in every punch he threw.

they were both so, so alone and seeking something that would stay, something that would last because everything else that made them happy seemed to fall just out of reach now.

but just one move away, one final move to a small town in georgia held everything that could hurt and heal them all in one. they were all what everyone needed, even if they didn't know it and it drives me insane that if these kids hadn't been put through hell, they never would have found each other.

and they're more than willing to claw their way out together, not because they have to to survive, but because they want to so that they can live.

red what have you dooone 😭/pos

[simplydnp]

be honest with me. what are the chances of a hard launch in june

anon this question goes back years. and the thing is. we have been right once before.

you ask me this this time last year? fuck no. i might even quip that dapg would come back before dnp would hard launch. well. look at us now.

and even then, you look back on the content they started with in the revival--it honestly kind of felt exactly like where we left off, only a lot more explicitly queer (we stan). and then... trying to see without my glasses 2. and bang, spooky week happened. and that shifted the balance. we suddenly got slo-mo replays of handholds. day, after day, after day, finishing with the absolute masterpiece of halloween baking cinnamon rolls. in all honesty it was so much more than i'd've ever expected from them. truly another post-baking universe.

and it never really slowed down. suddenly we had cat prom photos, catboy butlers, catboy dan w/ phil photography credit, theyre 'wrestling' --running us full throttle into gamingmas, the first since 2017. and every day we had a new thing to freak out over: standing close. golf jokes. and then... pinof reacts. i don't know what compelled them to do it but i do have speculations. genuinely, i think they wanted to defang a lot of their history. we treated pinof 1, especially, with this... reverance. and it wasn't talked about too publicly--and dnp didnt do it either. so if they really wanted to move on, to bring down the walls, open the floodgates, define this new era: they had to throw the first stone. and they did. quite heartily too. suddenly this almost taboo part of their history--almost too intimate to be perceived--was on the table. and we were talking about it. joking about it. giving clear signals of 'we see it, it's okay.' and suddenly we existed in a post-pinof reacts world. of anything, i would've never predicted they would've done that. absolutely wild. follow that with it takes two being so chill and fond. incohearant being so blatant and heartfelt. trombone champ being unhinged and chaotic. the genuine and sweet complimenting of each other in the red carpet video. devan wedding... happilyphoreverafter... we crashed forward in time. never knowing what would be next. where is the line? how far will they go.

they teased us with japhan honeymoon and we knew 2024 would be wild. but we didn't know how much. from wdapteo 2023, to specific reminiscing about japan w/ devan, WAD happening, and phil playing a huge role in it all--from the orange carpet hosting, to 'ive been in *sex noises* with phil from the start!', to 'remote crisis manager phil lester', to dan saying he can stay during the thank you.

one of the biggest videos so far this year was the tiktok likes one. i will be forever haunted by the dog eating cheeseburger and willy wonka tiktoks--theres some things i was never meant to know. and yet. they tell us. explicitly.

every single video on amazingphil since the return of dapg has mentioned or featured dan. there's been a palpable shift in the way they interact. have you seen the way phil has been glowing in videos lately? this guy is on cloud nine all the time. it's really not hard to see why.

the energy of keep or yeet w/ dan... the absolute Lack of pretense of it all. phan twitter... watch your step baby girl...

dan and phil fucking crafts. talk about an unexpected return. legacy defining, one might even say. we're still in this tailspin of what everything means and they drop this insanely iconic video on us. from the storytelling to the production to the aesthetic--and its all capped off by explicit handholding. yes, it was part of the sacrifice. but hand in hand, the heart dan ripped from phils chest in one, and the knife that did it in the other... oh boy. we're really in it now. and then they put it on fucking merch. genius. truly no one does it like them.

and the foot has been on the accelerator since. dan and phil connections, shuffleboard & mocktails, getting deep slumber party, acknowledgement & approval of fics (yes previously given but never like this)--hell, even the sims today was wild for 'is their love language horrible banter 👀'.

you didn't ask for an essay but i gave you one. all of this to say, they've been moving the line. quite intentionally so. they intentionally revived their joint branding. they are 'dan and phil' again, and seem happier than ever about it, and i think that means something. they're saying things they never would have before--out of the closet or not.

as for june... 5 years since coming out is a big deal. so is this year being 15 years of dnp. hell, so is this year for being the first out pride month where they're explicitly a duo and regularly making content together. they're sentimental, there will be something.

my craziest idea is reacting to their coming out videos ✌️😔 --but i don't think it'll actually happen. as for more realistic, i could see pride merch. and however that goes will be significant, in my opinion. i'm excited and curious.

i don't know if they'll hard launch. it's hard to put all of the implications, complications, and speculations back into the box once it's opened. dan's talked about it before--wanting to be able to fuck up and not be publically executed, instead, being able to learn and grow and work it out. i think that's a very understandable stance to have. very grounded. we'd have to ask him if tour/dapg has changed that now. i do think he's had some sort of life epiphany--whether it's about that specifically, only he can say. but i think it's there.

even if i portray a lot of level-headedness, i wear my clown nose with pride. sometimes the only option is to go with whatever is funniest at the time. they're both jokesters, so they could commit to a bit like that. but it's also like, it can be too serious for them to want to joke about. i don't know. i think we're in this almost beautiful state right now--the we know you know of it all. there's no expectations, no demands to be met, no obligations of types of content. they're happy. we're happy. it depends on if they feel ready. if they want to. we'll be here, always.

[cheeseceli]

That must be right

Pairing: Min Yoongi × Gn!reader

Genre: fluff, f2l, drabble

Request: can i request a yoongi idolbf! x reader and its just like a fluffy date, they're just dating and didnt really actually confess their feeling yet and like at the end of the date he or reader confesses

Warnings: tzuyu (twice) makes a cameo, suga overthinks a bit, y/n was delulu for a second here, not proofread.

A/n: don't you just love when he smiles | daily click

Yoongi doesn't know what to feel right now.

He should be happy, because oh my God this is happening. But he should also be anxious, because what is he supposed to do now that this is happening? And on top of it, he should be scared, because is this even supposed to be happening?

The way you saved his number as "my love" is a fact that has been spiraling in his head for hours now, since he discovered it. And it is just a silly little detail about your every day life. He wasn't even supposed to know about that. But he does. And now he can't stop thinking about that.

It's also about how you told Tzuyu (who definitely shouldn't have told Suga) you couldn't go out with her since you were having a date with your boyfriend. The boyfriend being Yoongi. And the date being the place you guys should go to in a few hours.

And there's nothing wrong with that, right? Except for the fact that you called him your boyfriend when he is... not your boyfriend. He would love to be, of course! But he is not. Unless he got lost in translation, which he highly doubts, considering how he is always replaying everything you say and do in his mind.

But you called him that. And, in some type of way, you called him your love as well. Never to his face, but you did. And Yoongi has no idea on how much of that he should consider. It could be just a not very funny joke. But you wouldn't joke about it, would you? So maybe he should just behave like nothing happened. Yeah, that's right. He shouldn't even know about those things at all.

So for the rest of the day, he pretends that he didn't discover anything. Everything is exactly as it was. But he can't bring himself to actually forget those. "My boyfriend". "My love". Those sentences were quite harsh to forget about.

You guys are on a date, so why can't you be actually dating? Do you even know that this is a romantic date? Does Yoongi know that? When did the line between friends who are secretly in love and actual lovers blurry itself so hard? It's getting ridiculous at this point. So many questions and very few answers.

He watches as you hold the huge popcorn bucket, trying your best not to drop anything. You were just waiting in line with him, waiting for the movie session to start, but you were so happy. Even when just standing still, your eyes were undeniably full of joy.

Yoongi also didn't miss how you never failed at being close to him. Not on a way to overwhelm him, just to be there. Like you just wanted his company, even if you weren't touching each other. Even if you were in complete silence, even if you didn't even look at each other just yet. You were both there. And that was all that mattered.

Useless to say that he paid absolutely no attention to the movie on the silver screen. He had no idea of who was staring in it, or what it was about. He barely looked at it to be honest. He was looking at you all the time. My boyfriend. My love. You surely acted like there was truth to those words.

For the first time in the past hour or so he looked away from you. He focused his gaze on the movie playing instead, but only because he wanted to reach to hold your hand, and he wouldn't be able to do it if he looked at you while doing so. That was proven particularly correct as he felt you turning your head just to look at him the moment you felt his touch.

He should've looked though. Maybe then he would see how your eyes proved that Yoongi was indeed your love. Maybe just not your boyfriend. Yet. That was soon to be solved, as he was already planning on how to confess the moment the two of you got out of the movie theater.

You were, after all, calling him your boyfriend for a while now. However, now it was time for him to call you his partner. Oh, and he so would do it. It felt right to do so.

And if it feels right, it must be right.

Masterlist | you'll probably like: shut me up

Reminder that this is all fiction! This does not represent the members in real life!

Taglist: @yuyubeans @butnotmontana

Dividers by @sweetmelodygraphics | credits for images 1, 2 and 3

[aliamor]

I just read the case smut headcanons... "Buds thinking of starting a family" ELABORATE??? 👀👀👀 (if you don't mind)

HAHAH I GOT YOU ON THIS ONE, i knew someone was going to question that and IM GLAD TO ANSWER🙈

! Casoh being a dad!

🎀- since the beginning of both of your relationship, the topic of kids was pushed off until things got serious and more time was spent building into the relationship.

🎀- but both of you were okay with have 1-2 kiddos, just waiting for that time to come. (Also if you want more just pretend this sentence doesnt exist)

🎀- when you and case do intimate moments, protection is on, but in the heat of the moment all is case can think is how worth it is to make you a momma to his kids.

“One kid wont hurt us” case loves saying later that day.

🎀- yes there are pregnant scares once and a while but if it came back positive none of you would be disappointed.

🎀- once on stream caseoh was opening fan mail and got a little shirt and the fan said ‘this is for mini caseoh in the future’ (I believe this actually happened but im not to sure the exact gift was) and he called you in to see it and you thanked the chat, even though you weren’t pregnant, yet.

🎀- if you were to become pregnant, you didnt tell his stream until your bump was filling out. But one day you were about four months pregnant and case started stream the normal way and then saying ‘chat are you ready to be a god parents’. With you walking into frame holding your belly.

🎀- once the baby was there (you can decide if you want it to be a girl or boy) you introduce the baby to chat wearing the gift one of his fans gave him in his fanmail.

🎀- if you dont want your baby being on the internet, you will show a pictures of your baby in outfits but their face blurred.

🎀- caseoh does take off a few streams to help you take care of the little one, hes such a good father. (I could just see it)

🎀- chat loves hearing about the baby 24/7.

Mwah,

Literally this is the cutest one ive done yet. I love yalls ideas smm

🫡

[emmyrosee]

HEYY IM SORRY I DIDNT SEE THE CHARACTER OF YOUR CHOICE PART BUT I WOULD LOVE

53. Take off your shirt

34. Hugging while grabbing butt

With SUNAAAA❤️❤️

AHHHH THIS IS SO CUTE🥹💖

tw// butt grabbing. Ending of the post got a little suggestive, so this is your suggestive content tw

-

Arguably, this is when Suna thinks you look best.

Dopey in your own love for him, gazing at him like he’d sewn the stars in the sky by hand for you. It’s been a long day, a day filled with arcade games and picnics and Polaroid pictures to mark it all; a day out of a shitty, yet craveable romance movie, a date you haven’t been able to have since he started playing for EJP.

But now that you’ve had a day all to yourselves, it’s a mystery how you two could go any length of time without each other.

Even now, clad in his shirt and sleep shorts, pinned between himself and the countertop, your paws can barely keep off each other, a desperate dance over skin and muscle to keep each other as close as possible. You sneak kisses with each other as if to do this in secret, a matter of teasing, and god as if you two weren’t obsessed with each other enough, this has you in a spell that keeps you both in a heat.

“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me,” he mumbles into your skin, sponging kisses over the delicate muscles of your throat. “Don’t know what you’ve done to me, but I love it…”

“Ew,” you tease, caught up in your own affection to come up with any other cheeky response. You nudge your nose with his and cradle his jaw with your hands, the hands he wants to hold forever, and he turns his head slightly to press a kiss to your palm. “Really got you to fall in love with me, didn’t I?”

As if the feeling isn’t mutual.

“You’ve completely ruined me,” he lies, hands traveling down to the curve of your ass before gripping softly, pulling back when you giggle into his mouth.

“Sorry,” you titter. “Tickled.”

“I cannot stand you,” he snorts, but he does grab the meat of your ass firmer, smirking at the soft purr slipping past your lips. “That better?”

“Much,” you assure. The hand cradling his cheeks drags down his body to tug at the loose collar of the tank top he was wearing. He cocks a brow curiously, but makes no moves to still your hands.

“Take off your shirt,” you whisper, teeth sinking into your lip cheekily.

“You take off your shirt,” he says, rolling his eyes at your demand. “What do you think this is?”

“I want to see your stupid, hot, dumb abs.” You tug at the collar again, and prompt it with a gentle bite to his lips. “Besides- don’t you want to take off my shirt for me?”

He grins, grabbing your thighs and tossing you onto the counter, relishing in the squeak you give him.

“Why didn’t you start with that?” He teases, slipping of his tank top and tossing it carelessly on the kitchen floor.

“Love tearing clothes off of you.”

[alcoholfreenayeon]

can you do co worker Irene x fem reader,where Irene secretly has a crush on reader and she waits every time for her.But this day readers ex didnt stop calling reader and ended up waiting for her at work so Irene went to reader and acted like her gf.Later Irene took reader to her home and they made out ,THENN READERS EX CALLED AGAIN.irene told her to answer the call and while they were talking reader couldn't stop moaning (English isn't my first language sorry)

A/N: Well….as I wrote this, I realized it was not so much smut but more fluff that’s a bit suggestive so this will be a bit disappointing for all of you who voted for this expecting smut😭(but also horny jail for you all🚔) anyways, this is probably the last request I’m doing before I finish the Angst April fics unless I get a random burst of creativity.

Stupid Cupid

Irene x fem!reader

CW: Fluff, suggestive

Your phone started ringing, once again, right on time, your ex calling you exactly 5 minutes after your lunch break starts so you have no excuse to not pick up other than that you don’t want to talk.

You sigh and pick up, knowing the calls will continue to come if you don’t pick up. “Hello….”

As you talk with your ex, telling her the same thing you have been for the past month, you are seemingly unaware of an annoyed stare in your direction, albeit from afar. Irene watches you, an exasperated look on her face. ‘The audacity of that stupid woman to keep calling her y/n’, she thought to herself. ‘Well…not her y/n….yet’. She really wanted to walk over, snatch the phone out of your hand, tell your ex to fuck off, block her and then kiss you. But alas, she couldn’t do that. And that annoyed her even more. Regardless, she was about to get on with her work when her ears perked up at something you said.

“What! What do you mean you are on your way here? I don’t want to see you. I already sa-. No, we don’t need to give it another tr-…..fine, whatever”, you sigh and put down your phone, rolling your eyes in irritation, unsure of what will happen next when you feel a gentle tap on your shoulder. You turn and find that it’s Irene, your coworker. Supposedly she’s the scary one but she’s been nothing but sweet to you so you have always chalked it down to her just being more prompt and serious than the rest.

“I, ahem, I did the….”, Irene begins but trails off when you take the sheets of paper from her, your hands lingering on hers for a second. You smile at her and you could have sworn she blushed. “……I couldn’t help it but I overheard you on the phone…”, she says hesitantly.

“Ugh..yea..my ex…it’s just a mess”, you start, “and yeah I know I can just block or her not answer or whatever but like…I think she won’t let up as long as she thinks she can win me back…”

Irene listened to you, a concerned look on her face, a slight frown forming on her face before her expression softened again. “Y/n….maybe…”, she hesitates, you see her cheeks flushing, “you should tell her you are seeing someone else…or something”, she quickly added at the end.

You sigh, “I wish it was that easy, she’ll keep on pressing me even then, who is it, how do they look, why them etc etc. Thanks for the suggestion though”.

Irene stayed quiet, a bit stumped. That’s when you hear a shout, “Y/N there you are!”. And you see your ex walk up and you sigh. This was not going to be pretty….

She walks right up to you and you can’t deny it, she does look really pretty, “Y/n…”, she smiles, “look I’m sorry for being so pushy lately…but I really think we are making a mistake. Like it’s been a little while now and it’s been difficult for me and you said it’s been hard for you too so why don’t we just make out-up, oops”, she giggled.

Irene couldn’t believe what she was hearing, no way Y/N would fall for this trap right? Like it was so blatantly obvious.

You stayed silent…yes she was not completely wrong, you had been feeling a bit lonely lately and you did miss intimacy but you had been focusing on your job lately and that made it much easier, like for some reason you didn’t feel like working was such a burden anymore. But did you really want to start over once again?

As you considered your options, your ex took a step closer, smiling, her hands reaching for your cheek.

That’s when Irene suddenly stood up, a determined expression on her face as she got in between you two. “Stop. And leave. She doesn’t want you. How many times does she have to tell you before you understand huh?”, she says calmly but also coldly.

Your ex seems taken aback for a moment before she chuckles, “Who even are yo-”

“I’m her girlfriend.”, Irene says defiantly.

Now your ex looks stunned. She gives Irene a once over, a frown forming on her face and she faces you back again, “Y/N? What is she….”

You look at Irene and then your ex and make up your mind, “Yea, it’s true….”.

“You both are lying, there’s no way, I don’t believe-”, she begins again but is cut off.

“Believe what you want but that’s the truth. And none of your business anymore anyway so just go away”, Irene snaps.

Dumbstruck, your ex just stares at Irene who grabs your hand takes you back to your desk, as soon she’s out of sight, you notice Irene is completely red faced and she lets go of your hand slowly, reluctantly…and then glances at you, unsure of what of say when you hug her, “Thanks for that, you shouldn’t have…now she’ll be after you too…”

“I don’t think I should worry about that too much”, Irene replies, seemingly unbothered.

“No…I mean like…I’m pretty sure she’s gonna be at the parking lot when you leave, watching us to see whether we were lying or not…”, you sigh.

“Oh”, Irene says quietly as she realizes what you mean, “I…I guess maybe we just…just pretend abitlongerthenright?”

“Huh…oh..oh!”, you are a bit surprised Irene is still willing to continue with this facade, “S-sure…I guess that works…maybe it’ll put her off for good? But…what do we do?”

“……maybe….you come with me…you know instead of taking the bus…just pretend I’m dropping you home or something?”, Irene says quietly.

You consider it for moment before nodding in agreement and that was the plan.

Hours later as you get in the passenger seat of Irene’s car, you notice through the side mirror that a familiar car was in the distance, observing. You sigh and point it out to Irene who says nothing and begins to drive in silence.

A couple minutes in, you notice that your ex is still following and you once again tell Irene who suggests maybe you both go to her house for a bit so the ex doesn’t bother you and has no choice but to believe you both are dating.

20 minutes later, you are sitting awkwardly in Irene’s living room while she gets some snacks. You both eat a few biscuits and then Irene suddenly becomes really quiet, she looks at you and takes a deep breath, “Y/N…..I have something to tell you…”

You look at her, perplexed and tilt your head, “what is it?”, however as you say it, you suddenly become very conscious of her hand on top of yours, the way she is looking at you right now, how you yourself look at the moment and why suddenly it feels like there’s so much tension between you both.

She hesitates…and hesitates again and then looks away, moving her hand and shifting away looking frustrated, “Nevermind…it’s nothing…my bad”.

“Huh”, you feel surprised and a bit hurt that it seems like Irene isn’t completely comfortable around you, “Come on, just say it, you’ve already said you are my girlfriend”, you say smiling and nudge her, “What could be-”, you falter when you see Irene look back up at you, nervously biting her lip and then suddenly putting both her arms on your shoulders, pushing you back a little and she starts to lean in, as if you kiss you.

Not knowing what to do you just shut your eyes and a moment later you felt her lips on yours. She kissed you and kissed you again and this time you kissed her back and before you even realized you both had begun to make out. A minute later Irene finally pulled back, both of you red faced and breathless, panting, looking at the other.

Irene clenched her fists and suddenly blurted out, “I meant it when I said I want to be your girlfriend”.

You slowly blinked, “what…..”

She sighs in frustration, looking away, blushing, “don’t make me say it again…..”

Unbelievable, was Irene really saying she liked you? What! Did she always like you? Is that why it always seemed she was nicer to you? Did you like her too? You didn’t think so but…at the same time why did it feel so good when she kissed you, why did your heart pound when she said she was your girlfriend….why couldn’t you take your eyes off her when she drove you here…..did….did you like her too? Maybe…enough atleast to be willing to give it a shot with her.

You look at her and she doesn’t meet your eyes but you feel her tense up, waiting for your reply and then this time, you kiss her. Irene gasps but then leans into it, melting into your arms. She then caresses your cheek and begins to take off her jacket, “Y/N…..I want you”

Even though that makes you want you bury your face and squeal, you manage to stay somewhat calm, smirking at her, “what are you waiting for then?”, you say moving back and leaning against the sofa.

As Irene gets on top of you, her eyes full of desire, suddenly your phone starts ringing loudly completely ruining the mood…you both sigh and you pick up….

“Hello….oh it’s you…what now, honestly you are just being really annoying now”, you say, annoyed now that your ex is still calling you. “No, I don-ah!”, you cover your mouth as you almost moaned because Irene just began to kiss your neck. You try to give her a look to stop but shakes her head, “keep talking”, she says smugly while continuing to kiss your neck while her hands begin to undress you.

A few minutes later, you were shivering, almost completely naked, your neck and shoulders full of hickeys and your ex almost crying on the phone as she cuts the call, realizing what was happening.

You take a deep breath and toss your phone away, ready to jump at Irene but she beats you to it, getting on top of you, her hand clamping your mouth shut, “you were so bad right now, couldn’t even be quiet while on the phone…that can’t happen, so I’m going to test you now”, she whispered as her hands began to sink lower and lower, “if you stay quiet….I’ll let you off or else you are going to be edged again and again until I get what I want from you ok?”…….

[updatingranboo]

ranboo tweet... uh

["This was such a good joke and I am appalled by the fact that it has not gone absolutely bonkers viral. I mean is comedy dead? I just dont understand how a regular human being can read the word "Greans" (A combination of green and jeans) followed by an image of, well, green jeans, and not absolutely evacuate themselves in laughter.

I believe this has something to do with the fact that comedy as we know it is dying. It has become too mainstream in todays media and that is the main problem. Gone are the days where silly little guys in their silly little hop hats are able to go "knock knock" and absolutely change the world. Nowadays you have to have so many things that go into a joke for it to remotely even be funny, setup, punchline the whole ordeal. Whatever happened to just a simple Practicality joke? Whatever happened to just being able to slap someone and be the headlining act?

The world is so full of so called "comedians" these days it makes me sick. All these people do is spend hours writing and practicing their act in order to try and sway an audience to have a good time listening to their words. For SHAME! Comedy used to be just two people on a stage just slapping eachother and going "knock knock" for twenty hours. Whatever happened to the good ol days where people just laughed at whatever someone said because their brain hadnt fully developed?

This is why I believe that I am going to start performing my comedy acts to a bunch of babies. An absolute hoard of newborns. I will make my jokes to them and they will laugh for they truly understand what humor should be. I will go to a hospital in that little room they have where it is very easy to switch said babies and cause a bit of a ruckus, but instead of doing that (very funny joke) I will simply perform for them and relish in their cheers and guffaws.

It is sad that one has to turn to performing to just babies in order for the world to understand the complexity of ones said humor, but alas if its what I must do its what I must do. Maybe one day we will revert back to absolute comedy anarchy, where the chicken has not yet crossed the road, but until then I will continue to strive and push forward in this dark age of comedy.

Maybe a complete reset of what we find funny is in order, maybe we have lost what humor once was for us. We obviously have considering my VERY FUNNY TWEET does not have a bazillion likes and has not spun off at least 30 million movie deals. (Please note that this joke is satire, and Ranboo stands in solidarity with the SAG-AFTRA strikes. Support actors and writers. -A message from Ranboo)

I spent time and effort making this tweet, I saw the green jeans in front of my eyes (which are very squishy) and my neurons fired and made this absolute gem of a joke. I was excited to share it with the world, I tweeted it nearly right after I saw it, excited to see what new adventures this tweet could bring me. I went to bed all cozy smiling like a child on christmas eve night, excited for the morning. When I woke I turned to check my phone instantly, my eyes racing to see the like total. What would it be? 500k? A million? I was surprised that my dms hadnt blown up with a personal message from every billionaire going "let me give you all of my money I can never make anything as good as your "Greans" tweet" but It must have been a glitch.

I was appalled to see that my tweet had only 30K??? 30K for the pinnacle of all of human achievement? A slap in the face of innovation is what it felt like. Like when that thomas edison guy ate a stolen lightbulb or something idk what he did really but I remember the person who made that lightbulb which he ate probably felt really sad and I felt really sad so I felt a deep connection with that person.

I quickly fell into a great depression, this is what all of my life had lead up to: one sad tweet. I didnt see the outside for years because of this tweet. I thought to myself "why would they do this?", "Isnt humanity supposed to be kind, supportive, and have a sense of humor when it comes to differently colored jean jokes?" (dcjj as I call them), and "Man I should probably have a burger" (I did) (very yummy) but as I ate my burger all I could taste were my TEARS as I chomped into it from the top down. It felt like I couldnt do anything right. Until thats when it hit me.

Im not the problem, EVERYONE ELSE IS! My humor isnt "bad" or "unfunny" or "makes me want to find a microwave and cause it to malfunction so I either become the hulk or die" (Please do not try this. -Another Ranboo message) It has to be that simply I am so far ahead in the world when it comes to comedy that my time has simply just not yet come! My jokes will be funny to a different generation, which will be frowned upon at first but I will quickly be welcomed with open arms, and told that I am an innovator, a true scholar of all that is funny.

And so I wait for that day. I wait for the day that people look back on my Greans tweet and realize, that without a doubt that it is the funniest thing that they have ever seen. The problem is not with my joke, the problem is with the world, and thats what makes humanity beautiful, is that it evolves, it changes, it doesnt stick to its mindset that a tweet that has the word "Greans" followed by a pair of green jeans doesnt get a BAZILLION LIKES! I wait for that day, and for those of you who are with me, I hope you wait patiently as well. Stay strong."]

[grievedeeply]

HEY LAUFEYY!! i saw your requests were open so i wanted to send you one!! could you do headcanons of how you think chishiya and banda would kiss reader?!?! that would be great!!!!!

ZACCCC hey thank you for requesting!!! i love this idea so much sooo i hope i did them justice even though this is kindaaaa short??? LMFAO i dunno i didnt want to get too repetitive. in my mind they can behave very similarly

characters included: chishiya shuntaro and banda sunato

gn!reader | no tws | join my taglist!! | tags: @hawkins-hs @energeticsirens @fiona782

kissing headcanons with..

chishiya shuntaro

this man... when i'm saying he knows exactly what to i'm being completely serious

everything about him is so captivating, and his kisses are no different. he knows that and uses it to his advantage whenever he feels the need to

where he puts his hands depend on where you put yours. if yours are on his chest he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer. if your arms are around his neck his hands rest on your hips

his lips are so soft, too. he takes care of himself really well even though his appearance isn't a priority

chishiya doesn't kiss in public, especially when he was at the beach. if you're together then, expect kissing to be solely in private. it's what he feels okay with

after the ten of hearts game, he starts to warm up to the idea of kissing you in public. it won't ever be too much but he's okay with a quick kiss, sometimes longer ones if the two of you are splitting up

when he kisses you, he's very soft. his touches are gentle, no matter what sort of mood he might be in. he's good at masking his emotions, so you wouldn't have any idea if he's angry unless he tells you

pinning you against the wall to kiss you..... definitely something he does

he loves seeing how embarrassed you get just from his actions. it's a bit of an ego boost, but it makes him feel really good about himself knowing he can make you react that way

really fond of kissing your cheeks and forehead too. it's quick and simple, and a way of showing his love for you in a way he knows you like

he kisses at anything he can reach if you're cuddling. that could be your neck, lips or even your chest depending on the position

he's.... so sweet. very very sweet. whispers his praises against your lips and everything <3

he knows how to get you flustered, but he really does enjoy kissing you. he wasn't too big on it before but he likes it much more with you :)

banda sunato

like chishiya, he knows what to do

he reads you like an open book, knowing exactly what you like just by watching you. it's simple in his mind, but you're blown away by his mind as you usually are

he has experience, but he doesn't really use what he knows from previous partners when he's with you. he learns you. you're different, and he adores it

he loves the way your lips feel on his. it's probably one of— if not his favorite— things to feel. your touch is calming to him and it helps calm his brain after a long day

veryyyy into kissing your neck

he'll come up from behind you, wrap his arms around your waist and just start kissing at your neck. it embarrasses you and he thinks it's the cutest thing in the world

he loves watching how flustered you get from him. it's so simple and yet.. it makes him feel nice. seeing that reaction from you makes him realize how loved he is

your lips are probably his favorite thing to kiss but he will take your hands and kiss your knuckles. it's something he thought was sweet, so he started doing it

he doesn't ever really want to stop kissing, honestly. if he didn't have to breathe, he didn't think he would ever pull away from you

though, when he's angry, frustrated.. really emotional, he's willing to get a bit more rough with you if you say he can

he won't hurt you, but if you explicitly tell him you don't mind helping him take his frustrations out, he jumps at the opportunity whenever he sees fit

he's pretty in control of his emotions though, so it happens pretty rarely

teases you a lot but really big on compliments too. it's 50/50 with him sometimes

[simplyreveries]

Can I request dorm leaders x reader whos Sam's younger sibling and its just chaotic at times with them and their partner but its sweet and adorable yet they also see a protective sam nearby or his friends on the other side watching them

You can ignore this if you don't want to or its a bother,have a lovely day/night

thats so cute what😭

riddle rosehearts

he finds how sweat you are to be endearing — it truly is what won him over with you… even though you get into trouble and chaos with ace, grim, and deuce a lot even when you're at heartslabyul to see him you find yourself attracting some sort of crazy situation to occur. nevertheless… riddle is a little bit more lenient with you and he does give you special treatment that the heartslabyul students have a love-hate relationship with because that means riddle wont exactly be Harsh on them either.

he was in the gardens with you one day showing you the pretty flamingos and cute hedgehogs that live there. he thought it was sweet to see as you held them in your hands, he watches you with a loving gaze only to be like utterly surprised when he catches a little shadow friend come and just disappear??? and you didnt even bat an eye when that happened too, just placing a hand on his arm giving him a reassuring laugh of “classic sam”... SAM??

riddle is a bit nervous to talk to your brother now whenever he comes by his mystery shop for something, but he tries his best to look and act his absolute best! sam chuckles because it's clear that he's trying to be exceptionally better in his eyes. though he does appreciate it when riddle does come up to him and ask him for advice on things that you would like as he peers around his shop looking for the perfect gift for you and such.

leona kingscholar

imagine having a good relationship with your brother, leona doesn't seem like he minds or cares much of sam or his little protective tendencies he may have over you. he'll shrug it off, thinking it’s more of annoyance when he's catches his friend finding the two of you together, like can't he see it's his time to sleep and rest on your lap right now... his ears always quirk at the faint noises of the shadow, and he huffs in irritation.

he's already used to a lot of chaotic behavior from a lot of people in this school and his own rowdy dormmates as well, so he doesn't really bat an eye when that sometimes gets yourself into trouble to which you would just playfully shrug off with a grin.

leona does think you are cute; your attitude comes to be very surprising for an all-villains school. but you've got him impressed with some of your own talents you've learned with sam, heavily within the business world- whenever you drag him into his mystery shop to say 'hi' to sam when walking through the campus. he does catch glimpse and hear your own inputs and even crazy but helpful ideas.

azul ashengrotto

it's a bit tough considering sam is basically his business rival... they have their own "battles" if you will with their businesses, like in their dorm ssr vignette where azul successful got customers back from sam by getting rights of his "mystery drink". he may or may not try to get some info out of you in terms of what ideas sam has for his store, but you just shut that down quickly haha.

azul does try to convince you that working at the mostro lounge is so much better for you. he keeps it as just a mere lighthearted suggestion - but you can tell he means it. he can't help it, i mean, your personality would be just great for customers! your chaotic energy would only just match floyds. azul would much rather have you around him more anyways.

sam wouldn't be the most trusting of azul, especially when it comes to you for more obvious reasons. so, it's going to take a while for him to start liking the idea of azul or let alone any of those untrustworthy octavinelle students, he knows what they're mostly about— he's been working at this school for a looong time. he says that like he isn't as well though….

he internally freaked out though when he notices sams shadow come and leave to just check up on you?? during one time when he was sharing a meal, small dessert and a moment with you during the calm after hours in the mostro lounge. he kept a cool and collected look, but this guy was sweating BULLETS.

kalim al-asim

he loves your energy, as kalim can always match it. he is just like you in many ways- you two are a perfect pair. he also gets along great, (at least he thinks) with sam as well. i mean, sam really doesn't worry much about kalim anyways, because its kalim. if he happens to notice sams little shadow friend on the off chance he'll happily wave and call out "hey! look who it is (name)!".

kalim straight up goes to sam all the time whenever he wants to know something like what he thinks he should get you as a gift or what kind of activities and dates would you like... but that sometimes just ends with kalim rambling about you to your own brother hehe. but hey, he also does want to be on sams good side!!

sam gave his approval though when kalim came in worriedly during near closing hours of the shop and literally bought anything and everything treat, chocolate, jewelry— things he thought you’d like and what. when sam was asking him what's this all for he’ll exclaim something is wrong with you and that you're clearly upset about something! (you only hugged him twice that day).

vil schoenheit

he thinks your relationship with your brother is endearing… he always been an only child so he wouldn't completely understand but he does value family a lot, which in his case, his father who he has a good relationship with

he believed he had a pretty solid relationship with sam, he does work there as a part timer during the new year's event. so, surely sam does have a good idea on the kind of person vil seems to be and believes he's a diligent person. not to mention he does have a popular and famous rep so surely; he's heard people talking about vil.

vil lowkey takes it personally when he notices sams shadow friends…. like theres no way he doesnt trust him?! he’ll have his brows furrowed, his hands on his hips and huff, and like riddle he’ll put on the best and most charismatic side of him to gain that brother of yours trust. like he did with the mostro lounge drink once, he’ll do the same for sam and promote a something new in his shop on his magicam-! plus you’ll like that too so it's easily a win-win for him.

idia shroud

he and sam have an interesting relationship considering they've once made some secret deal so idia could lowkey cheat in the beanfest event. so, they're both kind of chill together- well, sam was definitely a little... unsure when you happily came up to him you were dating idia.

besides that, one instance he hardly sees idia unless it's during the night to buy instant meals and recently released manga. but even then, it's the quickest in and out interaction with him. sam will always tell you finds that boy so strange, but then again everyone is here at this school, he’ll shrug it off… for the most part.

idia probably gets more nervous around him too though knowing he's an older sibling, as idia is older sibling himself he knows how overly protective they can be. he does like your relationship together as he likes that you two have something to relate with by having siblinhs. but he nearly freaks out when he catches glimpse of one of sams shadow friends. his eyes go wide and you're just like “oh…! my brother is so silly” and he's so confused?? as you just brush it off used to your brother??

malleus draconia

sam would be a little surprised needless to say when you happily come to him one day and excitedly tell him that you've been confessed to, confessed to by the malleus draconia…! he is quite used to hearing other students from various dorms gossip and nasty rumors, talking mostly ill about him, but he doesn't feel as if there’s a real threat or anything with him even when it comes to you… like anyone can see from a mile away that he is the epitome of a “gentle giant” with you.

like during the off chance that sam did send out his shadow… merely out of slight concern once it was literally when you were just making malleus a flower crown and placing it on his head and gently around his horns… literally nothing to worry about.

whenever malleus catches your more mischievous side come out when with your brother, he thinks it is quite amusing. you seem to take a lot from him,,, and not to mention he finds your relationship with him to be sweet. he in fact appreciates sams watchful eye over you, because it just means you're extra safe, you know?

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Catching up! So today we’re mostly having replies related to all the stuff we posted recently.

Starting with the most important question.

Anonymous asked:

Wait, Idia got called a brocon? When?

He did! Grim called him a brocon in 5-13 right after we saw Ortho for the first time :3 (timestamp on 5:42 just in case)

Anonymous asked:

How does that smoke beer donut taste?

(this is about this drawing)

Very smoky! And like something Gidel isn’t supposed to eat…

Anonymous asked:

I wanna see some of your traditional art

Actually, Anon, you’re looking at it…

The majority of things that we post daily was originally drawn traditionally, and then coloured digitally. I really want to do more art that is 100% traditional, but never get a chance to for a bunch of reasons :(

Anonymous asked:

I love your analysis holy cow! see its because of Book 5 that i cant stop seeing Vil and Rook as mom and dad. i love this ship mind you, (they are my comfort ship and it gives me life whenever you draw them you beautiful soul) but even if some didnt see them as a romantic couple--in my opinion they still have that VIBE you know? Like whenever they're there you just cant help but feel like BRO THEY WOULD BEAT UP YOUR BULLIES AND THEN GROUND YOU AND SEND YOU TO YOUR ROOM FOR FIGHTING IN THE FIRST PLACE LOL is it just a me feeling?

(this is related to this post)

Thank you for your kind words, Anon! I am very happy you enjoyed the analysis and that you like my RookVil art <3

Yeah, I think these two being very parental is pretty obvious and pretty intentional! All jokes aside, Pomefiore trio really feels like it was written in a way that they would read as a family. We don’t usually like this trope because characters playing house could get pretty boring, and a lot of family-related tropes don’t resonate with us at all. So I am surprised to this day that we love Pomefiore’s vibes so much. I’m guessing that it’s because of how unusual of a family they are, how Epel actually fights with Vil a lot, and how he grows from being a little brat to being a little brat that is eager to grow and excited to show his senpais his new cool magic tricks, while they tease him but still are very proud and excited for him. Like, they’re strict and would smack him (well, Vil would) but they also want him to grow. Woah, that sounds way too wholesome ew lol

Anyways! Even if we exclude Epel, and this is another thing I’ve talked about a lot, I genuinely feel like Rook and Vil were intentionally written as a couple that has been together for quite some time, at least coding-wise. There are just too many tropes and situations that they have that are usually used for couples… Alright I’ll stop myself or I’ll rant about them again even though I just did a couple of weeks ago.

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

I just love baby Vil so much, makes me wonder what happened

(this is about this drawing)

Adults with shitty opinions + kids that can’t separate reality from fiction happened… truly, two of the worst things that could happen to a possible friendship between actors.

A couple of asks about this drawing:

Anonymous asked:

Oh oh! I saw! Che'nya art! We (smiley kitty fans) are starving! Thank you for the food! It is delicious! May we have another plate, please?

Poor smiley kitty fans! :( I am so sorry you’re starving! Please enjoy your food.

Unfortunately I don’t have any more smiley catfood for you…….. yet.

Anonymous asked:

*see Chenya *

*starts biting at the bars of my containment*

Better question for him..... What that tongue do??? 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

What that tongue doesn’t do, Anon? Wink

Anonymous asked:

Question. How much of Riddle's body do you think Che'nya would lick to clean him?

In theory, he’d probably get bored pretty quickly, but I kind of want him to just keep licking… Riddle thought it would be over 15 minutes ago, but Che’nya’s still licking… The moment he would be done with his face, ears and head (cat saliva in Riddle’s hair…), Riddle would realise that Che’nya is determined to lick him all over. Time to call Trey…

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

Riddle gets licked my Chenya often in my lil delulu ass world

Sometimes Che’nya randomly appears, licks his cheek and disappears again.

Anonymous asked:

Bro I gotta know, what do the tweel's dick(s) look like on their merform? I was scrolling on ur bluesky and saw this one with jade and idia and something between idia's legs and I was like "is that his dick?" If so DAYUM! May that bussy rest in peace

Love your art and speedpaints btw💗

Thank you for enjoying my art and especially my speedpaints! I am very happy to hear that <3

Hehe I’m glad you liked that one! I had a lot of fun with that piece.

I feel like I draw merpeen differently every single time lol but I love the design we came up with for that Jade/Idia drawing, and in fact I do have a post in which I talk about how it probably works! There aren’t any pictures there, but there are some interesting thoughts…

[quodekash]

FUUUUUUUUUUUCKing hell theyre gonna kiss today????

hes so grumpy already I love this so much

the silent conversations chain and toey are having with their eyes oml I cant

pls this is so funny

theyre both deeply in love with someone else so it's jsut so unnatural to them

BUT ALSO id like to mention that the first thing chain did when he had to pretend to be hitting on toey was put his arm around his shoulders and rest his hand there. which is what he's literally ALWAYS doing with pun, no matter when it is, he's always standing next to pun with his hand resting on one of his shoulders

its like he associates his time with pun as being in a romantic relationship 👀

THESE FUCKIN BASTARDS 😭

JUST KISS IM BEGGING YOU

theyre lost in their own little world 🥺

kiIIIIIS

this is too funny, the cuts from "chain. chain what happened next." to ✨soulful dramatic guitar music✨

im sad they didnt actually kiss but also im not surprised

LOOK AT THEM, DUDE

THEYRE SO NATURAL WITH EACH OTHER

I FUCKIN LOVE FRIENDS TO LOVERS SO SO MUCH

half convinced theyre already dating, they just cant be bothered saying anything so theyre waiting for others to ask them about it

PUN IS SO CUTE DUDE I ADORE HIM HES FUCKING ADORABLE

I LOVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH THEYRE SOIMPORTANT TO ME

if I ever have a romantic partner, this is what I want

I cant explain it, I just wanna run up to them with pure joy and excitement, and for them to hold me back by just pushing against my skull

it just seems perfect, idk why

GB4JHERGB

THE FRIENDSHIP OF ALL TIME

genuinely think I might be more invested in their friendship than all the romantic relationships in this show

im fucking CRYING

my king matt, this was so unnecessary and I love everything about it

why does it suit him so well tho

they should kiss again I think

I feel everything about this image on a spiritual level

THIS ENTIRE AMUSEMENT PARK SEQUENCE BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY AND DOPAMINE IM IN LOVE WITH THSI EPUSODE

NEW COMFORT EPISODE UNLOCKED

look its really funny but I do feel bad cos this day is not even a little bit fun for him

like q is having a complete shit time

poor chain doesn't love amusement parks but he has to go on the rides with toey to keep up the facade cos toey loves these rides 😭

and its even worse realising Q also seems to love amusement parks, so he would be having a fucking amazing time if he could just go on all the rides next to Q cos they both love it so much 😭😭

fuckin FINALLY

LMAO WHAT

THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I JUST SCREECHED WITH LAUGHTER SO LOUD AND ITS MIDNIGHT

THE PURE COMICAL SHOCK AS HE REALISDE WHAT HE SAID, THE EXCITEMENT FROM EVERYONE ELSE AS THEYR EALISE WHAT HE SAID

I mean to be fair it was REALLY obvious

im surprised no one noticed earlier but also its a bl so im not at all surprised to find out theyre all fuckin dumbasses

SERIOUSLY THO TANFANG IS WHAT I WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP HOLY SHIT

a lot of the time watching bls ill be like "I want that" but its usually as a joke

but THIS?? the fucking adhd bastard (me) who just wants to be near their partner and compliment and always stimming and just having a swell fucking time while the other one loves them but is mildly tired but also in adoration? FUCKIN GIMME

also how the fuck has Q not realised, theyre all so fucking obvious

also also I cant explain it it just feels deeply as though pun and chain are for real dating they just havent told anyone yet

ill make a post about it all at some point maybe (I definitely wont)

PHYSICAL TOUCH IS HIS LOVE LANGUAGE 😭😭😭

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HE DOESNT HAVE TO HOLD HIM SECRETLY ANYMORE THEY CAN JUST WALK HAND IN ARM NATURALLY NOW

hear me out tho, this gets even funnier if he's actually already in a committed relationship that no one knows about yet

I dont think it's secret dating, it's just 'not super obvious dating to try and see JUST how oblivious all our friends are. its been three years at this point and still no one's said anything. we're starting to lose all hope.'

I love tan so much, the little wave

what the FUCK

what the FUCK FUCK???

THE SOUNDWIN LINE????

HERE IT IS ITS FUCKIN COMIN GUYS

HE SAID IT

HE FUCKIN SAID IT

[insert that gif of the crowd of people in the bar going insane]

holy fucking shit dude holy fucking shit

my legs are literally shaking idk if I can do this

FUCK TO THE YES, FUCKING EXPLICIT ASK FOR CONSENT HOLY FUCKING SHIT

WHAT THE FUCK

AND THE FUCKING SONG IN THE BACKGROUND !!!!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT DUDE

im gonna be here all day

I dont even need to watch the rest of the episode now

I can just go to bed if I want and watch the rest later or smth

dude I cant wait for q to realise that toey is milk frappe guy

HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT JUST PROCESSED IN MY MIND THAT THEY KISSED

WHAT THE FUCK

omg making out in a haunted house, what a dream

the workers watching on the security cameras probably had a blast that day

how funny would it be if there'd been a scare actor in the shadows in that room with them and they'd been about to scare them but they were too shocked with that tender kiss to remember they have a job

he needs to lie on his bed and just stare at his roof and think about that for a while

tbh same

look at him 🥺 he's so lost in that memory

thEY FUCKIN MADE OUT HOLY FUCK

welp on that note I think im done for now

I might finish the ep with my silly thoughts+screenshots later but for now tis the time for sleep

[preciadosbass]

31/7/24

woke up at 10 and had my breakfast [blehh] while looking at r/scene. also, heard about and saw the GERARD WAY SIGHTING??? RAA I LITERALLY WENT FERAL. HES SO COOL — my dad immediately started talking about my ARFID appointment today and i said that i didn’t know whether i was going yet. [which is what i’ve been saying for weeks.] but he said that id said yes to going. i love my parents, but they [mostly always my mum] do/does switch my words a lot and tend to think things happened/didn’t happen when they did/didnt.

i ended up going to my room after saying good morning to boris because he [my dad] started raising his voice and getting defensive even though i’d already explained that i’m scared to go and that i wont know how to tell the truth. my mum recommended me going and just listening to what the dietitian has to say but i didn’t see the point in listening to my parents talk about my ARFID and get everything wrong. [which isn’t entirely their fault, because i don’t talk about it — it’d just be triggering. especially because i cant speak for myself to a total adult stranger and if i did i’d expose my restrictive eating.]

he followed me into my room and started shouting so we got into an argument and when i verified i wasn’t going because everyone was being pushy he caved in and told me that i’m not allowed any of my safe foods and walked off. which i genuinely don’t understand as the whole appointment is about trying to get me to eat and he’s ultimately banning that for when i am willing to eat. i know my parents try their best but they don’t always have the best ways of putting it across. i get it, though. i know going to meetings is annoying for them but they’re always talking about how useless it is and how they can’t be bothered etc but if i confront them they say that they’ve never said such things.

after all that they’d already left and i obviously felt unmotivated to do anything for the rest of the day. my parents also told me that i’m not allowed to go on a walk today because i wasn’t deciding if i was going to go [even though they know i do terribly making decisions under pressure and they were rushing me and shouting] so that sucks. a lot. i cant eat now incase i go over my cals because i wont be able to burn it off. i feel so guilty about getting upset at my parents because it must be so hard to have a kid like me, genuinely.

i went back off to my room after checking boris is okay and started reading heartstopper again. i haven’t read the books since i was in school and i much prefer them to the series. i listening to my sad-ish playlist while reading because it’s more calming and easier to concentrate with. i finished the first book within around 13 minutes and then went on my phone for a bit. i was just scrolling aimlessly so i had a nap for 2/3 hours.

after waking up a had a bit of food and sat outside on the driveway with boris while playing ‘better music?’ on roblox because i had nothing better to do on my phone. then i did literally nothing up until 10:50 when i got boris inside and started listening to blur [cuz i’m bri’sh innit]. i started playing roblox again at around 11 and was on it for a short while until my mum came into my room and said that her and my dad are ready for me to ask my questions about boris.

i did it decently quickly although my dad did talk about me going through it quite fast today because he has the hospital tomorrow and i immediately felt even worse about putting them through this every night and the altercation we had earlier today. i know he’s going through so much and i wish i could be a better kid so badly. i wish i was better at expressing how i feel so they don’t mistaken me for being frustrated at them all the time. i love them so much. i know he was probably just pushy this morning because he’s stressed and he’s trying to show me he cares.

i then came down to say goodnight to boris first thing because ive once again had a headache all day supposedly cuz of my eating and i was falling asleep. its a little awkward to cuddle him when his new favourite spot is on the windowsill as there’s tons of stuff in the way, but i still managed to do what i needed to do. i went to sleep early at 1:40 after boris came into my room and i listened to some of slipknots’ the gray chapter. im going to embarrass myself and say i technically went over my cals today because i didn’t go on a walk.

have a good day/night -_<