#how does she - someone who has only ever been a wolf - even begin to approach him
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WOLF GAME
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THE WOLF GAME - PART 6
MERRY : Well, would ya look at that~? Seems like a sheep has been killed earlier than expected!
CHIE KOMIYA : Wh-Whoa! Wh-Where did you come from? 
MERRY : So, then in accordance with the rules, the Wolf Trial will begin twelve hours from now! Spend the next twelve hours wisely and find all the clues you can! See ya later~!
The first murder had occured, cementing this as reality. There was no more denying what was happening or hoping that we could all survive. As I stared at the cold dead corpse, my heart was pounding rapidly in my chest...
KOU NIIMURA : You're all acting shocked and confused, when there is no doubt that one of you is the wolf who killed her.
RINTAROU IIDA : The Wolf Game is finally starting~
After a moment of awkward silence, we all agreed to search the room for any clues that might help us win the trial. 
ME : Hm...There are some bath supplies...
ME : Weird, there are children's toys in here too...This rubber duckie looks like it's been used a lot for many years, but it's in pretty good condition...Must have been treasured by it's owner....
ME : Whose could they be...? It's not like a child lives here...Right? I dunno, it's creeping me the fuck out...
Misaki is bent over the sink with tears rolling down her eyes, throwing up into it.
ME : (Misaki seems real messed up by the sight of the body...I should probably leave her alone for now...)
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ME : Huh...There are various different kinds of detergents in here...Why such a large variety? 
He approaches Rintarou who is in the shower happily washing up.
ME : (That Rintarou is a really weird guy...Who would take a shower at a time like this? It's like he doesn't even care about the dead body...He must have nerves of steel...)
He heads to check in the kitchen which is nearby.
ME : Half the shelves in here are empty...There's enough space for a person to fit...And a knife on the sink...I wonder if someone used this for cooking? It's covered in oil...
Osamu approaches him, looking at the knife.
-
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Osamu Nagai, 36 years old.
He teaches Japanese to middle school students. He seems kind, but often times difficult to read. He likes novels and antique knick-knacks. He carries around a journal in which he is always meticulously recording everything that happens. He has wild, unkempt hair. Does he not care about it?
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OSAMU NAGAI : I never thought a murder would actually happen...This has become really serious all of a sudden...
ME : Yes, it has...This is the first time I've ever seen a dead body...
OSAMU NAGAI : It's the first time for me too...Judging by where and how she's bleeding, my bet is she was stabbed with a knife. That's why I came over to get a better look at that knife. It sure is suspicious.
He continues to look around for clues.
ME : Hm...There's a tea set here. It feels so out of place...
ME : I wonder what's in this box...? Huh...Looks like a notebook inside...Is this a recipe or something? It appears to be carefully handwritten...
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ME : What the hell is all of this doing here? Does this mean someone was living here...? 
In the notebook the following is written : "Our favorite hamburgers." "Use plenty of ground meat." "Big sis likes them with cheese." "That cute girl wants a big sunny-side-up egg." "For health, always serve the carrots and green peppers." 
ME : This is so weird...
He approaches Kou who is examining the surroundings.
-
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Kou Niimura, 21 years old.
A young man who is skilled in IT. He taught himself how to program and always carries around a laptop everywhere he goes. He's intelligent and has a sharp intuition. It would be best for us sheep if he never becomes a wolf. He dislikes relying on others. 
-
KOU NIIMURA : Based on the state of the body, I can only assume the murder weapon is a knife. That's why I came to the kitchen to investigate...But, the only knife I could find was covered in oil and clearly used for cooking.
ME : (Does that mean this knife isn't the murder weapon...?)
He continues to look around the room, finding a strange book with a wolf and sheep on the front of it.
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ME : Huh, it's a book titled "The Sheep and The Wolf." Maybe I should read it...
The book reads : "Once upon a time, in a place far far away, there were two good friends called the wolf and the sheep. One day, as they were spending time together in their favorite hang out spot, the sheep noticed a hunter aiming a gun at them from behind the wolf. The sheep tried to shout out to the wolf, 'Run!' But fear consumed her and no words came out. So scared that she'd be killed too, she ran away and left the wolf behind. While hiding and trembling, she watched as the wolf was shot and killed by the hunter before being skinned and turned into a fur coat. Ever since that day, the sheep lived in hiding, always regretting what she'd done. Years passed, and the sheep tried her best to forget the wolf completely. But one day, while walking through the forest, a wolf appeared in front of her. He said, 'I am the son of the wolf who was killed that day. When I was still a child, my father died because you were too scared to save him. You abandoned him.' And then she was slaughtered by the wolf."
ME : The story ends there...What is this book? It's title makes me think it's related to this Wolf Game somehow...
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oflgtfol · 2 years ago
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man i found this wolfwalkers fic from april that is totally unfinished and i never wrote any notes so i have no idea where i was going with it . i know i wanted to explore bill and moll's dynamic but man i dont actually remember how i wanted to do that screams. but anyway i do really enjoy how it started. so here it is i guess cuz idk if it will ever be officially published as completed
it takes place after the final battle but before the final scene of them traveling
That night, as the waning gibbous rises above the burning treeline, Móll urges the children onto the abandoned wagon left behind by Cromwell’s men. The hunter – Robyn’s father, she has to remind herself now – slinks away to go collect his human body, and returns five minutes later on two legs and with a horse in tow. A rivulet of blood runs down the side of his face, stark against pale skin where it must’ve blended into dark fur just moments earlier. Keenly, she’s aware of the sticky moisture still soaked into the front of her dress, the tightness of the recently-healed skin beneath. She turns away from him.
With five-fingered hands, she reaches over and tucks the blankets over each girl’s shoulders; Mebh first, already asleep and breathing heavily, then Robyn next, who blinks up at her blearily. Móll tucks a piece of unruly blonde hair behind her ear.
“Get some rest,” she murmurs. “You two deserve it.”
“Where will we go?” Robyn whispers, not out of any real desire to be quiet, but with the weight of exhaustion from the events of the past few days. Beside her, Mebh steps out of her own human body as a wolf, and immediately flops over snoring once more.
“We’re heading north for now,” Móll says, voice gentle. It had been the only direction she had been able to scout before being captured on her way back. Nonetheless, the region held promise – far from any towns, further still from any English settlers. Once they pass beyond the ridge of the hill, they should be free from the wrath of the Kilkenny soldiers, nothing but unfettered wilderness as far as the eye can see. That kind of liberty, that kind of safety, has been something she’s longed for many years to provide for Mebh and the other wolves; now, she has two more recently-turned Wolfwalkers in her pack to show it to.
For as much as Cromwell’s forces had intruded upon the wolves’ land, Móll could see from her time imprisoned that his poison had infected his own people first. Robyn and her father may have been humans for far longer than they have been Wolfwalkers, but they did not escape their time under Cromwell’s fist unscathed.
“Things will get better from here,” Móll finishes with an assuring smile. Robyn mirrors it, and finally her eyes slip closed. Her breath evens out, and with a soft exhale, her wolf slips out and curls up around Mebh’s sleeping form.
Móll settles down on the opposite side of her daughter, and with practiced ease, falls unconscious. She opens her eyes to find sharp night vision, the chittering of the night’s creatures and the distant flames crackling in her ears, smoke and charred peat burning her nose. Despite her own exhaustion, she stands up on all fours and jumps down onto the ground. She has too much to tend to before she too can rest: a wolfpack to reassure, a journey to plan, and —
As her eyes meet Robyn’s father’s from where he has latched the horse’s harness to the wagon, she thinks, and a hunter to deal with.
#if i continue this i wonder how long i can go without referring to bill by his name LMFAO#he'll just be 'the hunter' and 'robyn's father'#GOD. he and moll are so fucking interesting#i really want to navigate the weirdness that must exist between them after the movie's events#where they both have their own scars - from each other even - but they band together anyway#both out of necessity as two of the four remaining wolfwalkers and protecting the remaining two wolfwalkers. their respective daughters.#but also out of choice too. to purposefully put their bad blood behind them and move on + heal#just. SHAKES MY FIST.#brot posts#delete soon#this is entirely platonic btw. i think they have such an interesting dynamic but its interesting entirely bc its platonic#anyway thats what im getting at by this being moll's pov and referring to bill in these ways#'the hunter' for when shes viewing him negatively from. all That#and 'robyns father' when viewing him . neutrally?#maybe by the end she'll call him his name when shes more positive about him#after they have a nice chat about everything#LIKE FUCK DUDE! HE WAS A WOLF HUNTER!! AND NOW /HE'S A WOLF TOO/#thats what im getting at by having her refer to him as a hunter#LIKE THE WOLF HUNTER HAS BECOME THE WOLF !!!#how does she - someone who has only ever been a wolf - even begin to approach him#like the dude who once hunted her and nearly fucking killed her is now. part of her pack????#sorry these two drive me crazy they have such a cool fucking DYNAMICCCC
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themultifandomgal · 2 years ago
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Temptation Pt28
Temptation Masterlist
2 days later
"Sounds like someone's awake" I comment passing Renesmee over to Rose so I can eat
"Let's hope they won't be like you and Emmett" Jasper comments
"What's up with me and Emmett?"
"Well you're not quiet in the bedroom are you" Alice laughs
"Well then we should give them the keys to their house sooner rather than later" i plop some food in my mouth. Renesmee makes a grabby motion with her hand towards my food. I hand over a chip and she sucks on it before finally eating it
"She's growing way to fast" I sigh looking at the baby
"We will figure out what's going on, don't worry" Carlisle smiles.
Not long later we hear the door open and then close, the footsteps start to approach us
"Welcome to the family" Esme says turning to Bella
"I'd offer you some food but obviously you don't need it anymore" I laugh putting my plate down and hugging Bella
"You look amazing Bella" Alice comments
"Someone's been waiting to meet you" Carlisle moves out of the way to show Rose holding Renesmee. Rose hands the baby over to Bella. Renesmee puts her hand on Bella's cheek
"What was that?" she asks still looking at the baby
"She showed you the first memory she has of you"
"Showed me how?"
"How do I hear thoughts, how does Alice see the future? She's gifted"
"I've only been out for 2 days" Bella now looks nervous
"Her growth rate is unprecedented"
"Alright. That's enough experimenting for one day" Jake moves over to take Renesmee from Bella
"Jacob she's doing great"
"Yeah. Let's not push it" I see Rose smirking knowing that things are about to blow up
"Here we go" I sigh, Emmett chuckles pulling me into his side
"What's your problem?" Bella frowns
"Oh, do tell her Jacob" Rose smiles
"This should be good" Thomas comments smiling
"Let me take Renesmee for a moment" I smile and pick the baby up from Bella's arms
"Look it's a wolf thing"
"What's a wolf thing?" Bella already looking pissed. Rose moves out of the way and over to me
"Ummm.... you know we have no control over it. We can't chose who it happens with and it doesn't mean what you think Bella. I promise"
"Take Renesmee out of the room" Rose takes her from me and walks out. Edward tries to calm Bella but she stops him from touching her "Edward don't touch me right now I don't want to hurt you"
"Oh.." Jake almost whines. Bella takes the back of his neck and walks him outside. The rest of us following them.
"You imprinted on my daughter!" Bella shouts
"It wasn't my choice"
"She's a baby!"
"It's not like that. You think Edward would let me live if it was?"
"I'm still debating it" Edward mutters
"I've held her once. One time Jacob and already you think you have some moronic wolfy claim on her? She's mine!" Bella swings at Jacob pushing him down. Edward and Emmett chuckle. I hit Emmett slightly on the chest and shake my head. Leah and Seth come out of the woods in their wolf form
"It's fine Leah"
"Your going to stay away from her"
"You know I can't do that" once again Bella hits Jacob making him fly into a tree. Seth and Leah growl
"Stop her Edward" Esme pleads
"He said it's fine. She's amazing right?" Edward smiles. Leah and Seth move to stand next to Jacob growling
"Do you remember how much you wanted to be around me 3 days ago? that's gone now right?"
"Long gone"
"Because it was her. From the beginning it was Nessie who wanted me there"
"Nessie? you names my daughter after the Loch Ness Monster!" this makes Bella even more angry. Bella goes for Jacob, but Seth gets in the way and Bella ends up throwing him to a tree. She calms ever so slightly
"Seth are you ok?" Jake and Leah run towards him as his whimpering
"Seth, I'm sorry"
"He'll be alright" Jacob states "Bella you know me better than anyone. All I want is for Ness, Renesmee to be safe, happy. Look, nothing ever made sense before, you me. Any of it. Now I understand why. This was the reason" Bella sighs
"Let's all go back inside, calmly ok?" I suggest "I have a plateful of food that has yet to be eaten. Leah, Seth go phase back and I'll make you a sandwich" they both nod and turn back towards the woods. 
That evening we surprise Bella with a house for her and Edward
"Happy birthday" Alice says smiling
"I stoped aging 3 days ago" Bella looks confused
"Well we're celebrating anyway so suck it up" I laugh at Alice while holding on to Emmett. Alice hands Bella a key
"What's this?" Bella frowns
"Alice why don't you show her" I smirk
"Oh errr don't break anything" Emmett smirks earning an eye roll off me.
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softcallofdutyimagines · 4 years ago
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any safehouse crew x bell!reader headcanons? can be fluffy or angsty, whichever you prefer to write 🥺 i adore your work!
Aw, thank you!! Yeah, I'd love to share to some headcannons! These are sort of a mixed bag regarding fluff/angst, but I think they're mostly nicey-nicey :)
Sorry for your wait, but I hope you enjoy 💖
Adler
His relationship with you is such a tangled mess
He shouldn't even be doing this, not after all he's done to you and is still doing, but...
He just can't help but fall for you
Your memories of being with him during the war may be fake, but to you they're all too real
You know him better then anyone else, maybe even more then Sims
This whole thing started because you wanted to get to know him, to fill in the gaps and to continue growing the bond that only exists in your mind
Every day he struggles with the knowledge that what he's doing is wrong, along with the constant badgering about it from Hudson, Sims, and Park
But he's never felt this close, let alone wanted, by someone in his entire life
There'll come a day when the lid blows right off all this and explodes in his face for sure
Just... Not yet, he hopes
Hudson
If there's one person here who should not be getting involved with you... It's him
Adler and Park may be your handlers, but he's the one overseeing the entire operation
You wouldn't even be here if he hadn't passed down the orders from the higher ups
If there's nothing else you take away from this, he would have you know that there is much, much more at risk here then his mere job if he was found messing around with you
Hudson tried everything to resist you
You and your charming voice
You and your beguiling looks
You and your kindness and patient soul
His will was strong, but the flesh is oh so weak
No one has ever treated him like you do
Just an ounce of respect and a surprising, never ending stream of kindness...
What else is a lonely man to do?
Adler and Park know nothing, this is a term you both agreed on
And they never will, because as soon as your work here is done...
He will stop at nothing to keep you safe
Lazar
He knows, he knows...
He should be doing this
But damn it if you aren't just so... Loveable
Lazar has a big heart that just bursting at the seams with love to give
You'd think such a friendly fellow would be popular in the dating pools, but...
It would seem not so
He'll be honest, he was going to make moves towards Park...
Mostly because, between the two of you, she wasn't strictly off limits
But you were his first choice
And when Helen shut him down, well...
Why not at least try?
He never expected you to actually take to him
He deals with constant reprimands, but he dismisses them every time
No one knows what it's like to be so full of love and have no one to give it too
And now that he has you...
He'll be damned if anyone tries to take you away from him
Mason
Geez... All Mason wants is a stable relationship with someone who loves him and has the grit to see past his flaws
He's been taking his meds and seeing his psych, but the numbers and mind jacking still bother him
In fact, they very well might for the rest of his life
He feels so broken
So unlovable and far too damaged to even be an option for anyone else out there
So... Why are you so interested in him?
At first he brushes it off as a star struck kid, and maybe, at first it was, but then...
Things start to get serious
He meet up with you after work hours
You both get to talking and relating to one another through your memories of warfare and the current mission
You tell him you've seen plenty of things just as crazy as what's going on with him, and people that are twice that bad
He doesn't scare you, not one bit
Acceptance is all he's ever wanted, and to have found it in you feels better then anything he ever could've dreamed of
He falls for you so hard, he rarely let's you out of his sight and tries to get on as many of your missions as possible
Park
This whole op is a well oiled machine and she's the one driving it
Hudson and Adler may act like they're in charge, but they'd be nothing without her helping to hold them and you in line
She's a woman of rules, decorum, and conduct
There's a way to do things and a way not to, simple as that
And yet for all that, she still cannot understand how she's fallen in with you
She should be holding you at arms length at best, and yet here she is stealing kisses and playing with your hair when no one is looking
Maybe she's too much of a sucker for a good forbidden romance story
Or maybe there's always been something in you that's spoken to her from the beginning
A certain way you carry and conduct yourself
So brave and strong...
The kind of person she aspires to be, deep down...
Soon she starts saying things like "what's the worst that could happen" and "no one has to know"
And before long, she knows she could never let you go
When this mission is over, she swears to set you free from the mental prison and living hell she helped put you in, no matter the outcome for your relationship
She loves you too much to see you suffer
Sims
He has the exact same problem as Adler
You know him too damn well
Except... You don't really know him at all, huh?
It takes him so long to wrap his mind around that one...
But the more and more you keep coming to him, asking about things like 'Nam and his time in the war...
The more and more that line becomes muddled
How much have you been programmed to know, and how much did you learn naturally, just from getting to know him?
It's hard being a Vietnam vet you know...
Everyone blames you for the loss of the war, and no one wants much to do with a soldier in general, he guesses
Too much of a headache when you could just get a nice, normal person, right?
But old Vietnam vets get lonely too you know...
So you know what? Who gives a damn
This whole thing with you and mk ultra was screwed from the start, and who knows where the end will take you
If nothing else, if not even for his own benefit, he may as well give you the respect enough to enjoy a little fling
He treats it seriously. Very seriously.
He even grows to truly love you
Maybe that's why he's so scared for you
Woods
Here's a man who'd go his whole life proclaiming he'll never settle down and had no interest in doing so
He's a lone wolf, a life long solider, and far too fucked up for a stable relationship anyhow
At least... That's what he'll say
The truth is he yearns for what Mason and Hudson have
A happy little family and cozy home to protect and care for
He wants to feel needed, wanted even
And he'll never get that from long hours at the practice range and lonely weekend nights spent in his living room
He takes the same approach as Mason would at first
He brushes you off as a starry eyed fan and nothing more
But you know... He's never had anyone care enough to be a "fan" before
Alex laughs at him and keeps saying he's letting his ego get to his head, but what the fuck does he know?
He's got all that shit with the numbers and reznov stuck in his head, and yet he still has someone to go home to each night
So he does it, he gets involved with you
And it's the best damn feeling in the whole world
He loves you relentlessly and soon finds he can't bear to be away from you for too long
Mason will never let him life it down, but you know what?
He's just fine with that
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heliads · 3 years ago
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Second Best
Based on this request: “a Zoya Nazyalensky story where she and the reader are friends and one night they get into a fight and Zoya confesses her love?”
masterlist
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The task before you is simple. All you have to do is use your abilities as a Grisha Squaller to pick up the metal spear before you and launch it across a clearing into the awaiting target. It’s almost offensively easy, something you’ve been training to do since you arrived at the Little Palace all those years ago. It’s very simple, although the fact that you’re now next in line to complete the task makes it seem strangely harder.
However, the eyes of the rest of the Squallers are upon you, so you can’t exactly back down now. You step forward, lifting your hands in the traditional gestures used by the Etherealki whenever they have it in their minds to do something particularly interesting, and the spear lifts before you. You let it hover there, suspended in the air for a second, and then you fling your hands forward, palms facing the target. The spear flies in unison with your movement, burying itself halfway through its length in the target. It’s almost a perfect shot, maybe off by a hair’s breadth. You breathe a quiet sigh of relief.
You can hear applause from behind you, the usual aura of surprise that comes with the feat you’ve just accomplished. With a casual gesture of your fingers, the spear yanks itself out of the target, with only a few sparse pieces of straw falling to the ground as any sort of damage. Well, that and the gaping hole in the center of the target, although that is quickly mended by the Fabrikator kept on hand. You can’t help but grin to yourself as the spear returns to your hand. Let’s see anyone else match that.
You may have spoken a little too soon- seconds after you’ve returned the spear to its awaiting position near the front of the courtyard, it’s hurled again through the air, shooting with the precision of an arrow to land in the direct center of the target. You thought it might be impossible to improve upon the slight difference in your shot, but this latest Squaller has managed it with ease.
Normally, any other blue-garbed Etherealki would be looking around in horror and dismay, upset as to what would cost them the first place spot in the class and curious as to who could land a perfect shot such as that. You, however, are somewhat used to this now, and just keep walking with a grin. You can hear footsteps approaching behind you, and don’t even have to turn around to acknowledge the girl now matching your strides.
“Nice one, Zoya.” The girl beside you smirks. “I should hope so. If I so much as missed the center by a hair, you wouldn’t let me forget it for a week.” You laugh. “Of course not. How could I let go of the chance to not tease Zoya’Best In Class’ Nazyalensky? It would practically be  a crime.” Zoya nods, pretending to be serious. “Absolutely. The Saints might invoke their wrath upon you if you didn’t act upon such an opportunity.” You fling your hand over your heart dramatically. “Here lies Y/N L/N, dead after the Saints wanted to see her make fun of her friend and she let them down.”
Zoya snorts graciously as you pretend to faint on her, shoving your mock limp body aside. “Oh, you consider us friends?” You catch yourself easily, rolling your eyes. “Zoya dear, I know it would bring you no greater pleasure in the world to consider yourself a lone wolf, forever at the front of the pack, but I thought you’d realized by now that you simply can’t get rid of me. We’re friends.” 
You can hear Zoya grumbling, but when you glance over at her, there’s an ill-concealed smile dancing behind her eyes. “That’s an interesting way to convince people to like you, annoy them and make sure you don’t ever leave you alone.” You raise an eyebrow at her. “And did it work, yes or no?” Zoya huffs. “It did, but we’re not talking about that.” You grin. “Of course we’re not.”
You pause by the halls of the Little Palace, ready to part ways as usual. Although the Etherealki and Squallers specifically all have their quarters around the same area, Zoya’s rooms are a ways away from your own. This is typically where you split up, where you go your way and Zoya returns to her own devices, where she’ll most likely plot how to take control of the next lesson and prove herself the best of the students yet again.
However, Zoya shakes her head, continuing to walk next to you. “There are too many people waiting by my doors. I’m staying in yours instead, if that’s alright.” You nod, unable to keep a teasing grin from your face. “Of course it’s alright. It must be so hard, having to deal with suitors and fans so often. I imagine it to be simply exhausting.” You’re expecting Zoya’s vexed scowl and smack on the arm, so you’re able to duck out of the range of both.
This is how it is to be close friends with Zoya Nazyalensky, after all. You laugh with her, develop a thick enough skin to stand the constant scathing remarks that must of course be exchanged, and do your best to keep up with the neverending flow of power and possibility that always seems to come her way. That’s how it has always been, and how it will always be.
It’s not that you mind this, of course. You learned early on that no matter how hard you try, she’s always going to come in first in the class competitions and Grisha displays of strength. Being second out of so many Etherealki is pretty damn good for you, and you can tell that there’s a slight sigh of relief in Zoya’s eyes when you never seem to mind her showing off or ruining what might have been a first place finish for you. Hey- you never came to the Little Palace to always be the best, you came to learn and laugh, and you do that with Zoya. You would never trade what you have with her for fierce competition, even if it meant that you’d start besting her in contests.
This isn’t to say that you wouldn’t change slight aspects of your friendship, of course. For some reason, your heart decided to join the scores of other Grisha and even otkazat’sya that were foolish enough to fall in love with Zoya, and you’re just as hopeless as the rest. It’s just the way that she laughs when she wins, the glimmer of competition and spirit in everything she does, the undeniable thrill in your chest whenever you spot the familiar blue-clad silhouette heading briskly your way. No, you don’t think there was ever a way that you wouldn’t fall under her spell, even if you tried your hardest to fight it.
You could have told her you loved her, you think. You could have mentioned it to Zoya at any point, but you don’t. You’ve seen the way she watches potential friends for their weaknesses, having to always second-guess why they’re talking to her. Is this latest Corporalki approaching her because he truly wants to be her friend, or is it because he instead desires the secrets of her skill in Grisha abilities or as another girl in his bed? For anyone else, you think the constant doubts would drive someone mad, but it doesn’t for Zoya. She’s able to tuck it inside herself, bury it until you wouldn’t even know it was there at all.
She told you once, when the night was dark and long and Zoya couldn’t stop herself from having slightly too much kvas after a hard mission, that she sometimes terrifies herself over the fact that she might always be alone. You can still picture her there, curled up in a chair by your fire, the haunted look in her eyes. You know something happened before she came to the Little Palace, something that made her never trust another soul unless they worked to prove it, but it’s hovering in the back of her mind right now.
So, you nodded at her, and gave her another one of your sapphire blankets to help the way that she won’t stop shivering, and you listen. When Zoya looks up at you again, as if expecting to leave like the others or at least shoo her from your rooms, you simply offer for her to stay the night and not have to go back to her empty quarters. You think that was the moment when she finally accepted that you weren’t going away, when she really started to trust you.
This is precisely why you cannot say a word about how you feel- if Zoya finds out, she’ll begin to wonder if your entire friendship was just borne of a lie, the same as any of the other heartstruck Etherealki who think themselves brave enough to tame Zoya. So, you make sure to direct your lingering glances towards the woods and the scenery around you instead of her, and you force a joking smile instead of a soft look. She would know what you meant if you didn’t hide your heart, so you must do your best to deceive her. 
You’ve arrived in your rooms by now, tossing your outer coats to the side and warming your hands by the fire in the corner. You talk for a while about the class and the other students and the way Marie won’t stop staring at Sergei, a Corpoalki who she most certainly should not be associated with. Zoya stays until the candles burn low, and then she says goodbye with a smile. You return her smile. You always do.
You have a most interesting conversation over the next week. It’s not with Zoya, as it turns out, but General Kirigan. Truth be told, you weren’t expecting it at all. He’d caught you unawares in the library one night, while you were studying the particulars of the making at the heart of the world for a class lecture the next day. He hadn’t been there one second yet appeared the next, looming over your book with a shadow that seemed too tall and menacing to be real.
You had looked up in surprise, but he held up a hand, quelling any doubts that you’d accidentally done something wrong. He spoke to you about a regiment of Grisha in one of the backwater towns, some part of the Second Army that was asking for far too many supplies in exchange for the lackluster job they were doing to protect the potential Grisha in the city. For some reason, he asked your opinion of what to do about them, and you gave it. He thanked you with a smile, then left.
This happened twice more. All three times, he showed up, talked with you for a little bit, and asked a question on what you thought of a particular issue. Sometimes, it was still with the Second Army, and sometimes it was with the opportunities presented to the Grisha at the Little Palace itself. He seemed intrigued to hear what classes were like, saying how he had heard you were one of the best Squallers there were. You had smiled at that, and his eyes had glinted like a hound about to take down his prey.
That was the third visit, the most recent visit. You’re walking back to your quarters now, unable to keep a slight grin from your face. This is it, isn’t it? This is how you make your way from the classrooms of the Little Palace to the battlefield, to a real chance to do something different. When you open your doors, Zoya is propped up in an armchair inside, although this does not surprise you. You’ve long since given her free reign of all that is yours.
She looks up at you, a question already bubbling up in her inquisitive glance. “What’s got you so excited?” She’s never been able to miss a detail, has she? You can’t seem to tuck your smile away. “I’ve been speaking to General Kirigan, three times now. I think he might be on the verge of offering me a job in the Second Army.” You’re not entirely sure what you were expecting from Zoya- an expression of surprise, maybe some congratulatory words. Whatever you thought might happen, you were certainly not expecting her to stand up, face twisted in something that looked almost like fear and anger.
“You can’t do that. You should avoid him as much as possible.” Your feet stall from where you’d been crossing the room to her. “What are you talking about?” Zoya shakes her head, almost manic. “You should stay away from him. What did he tell you?” This, coming from your closest friend when you’d been so excited, is enough to make your happiness start to leach from you, replaced by a cold bewilderment and betrayal. “What does it matter? Zoya, this could be my future.”
Zoya seems unwilling to hear you out. “Tell me what he said, Y/N. You can’t trust a word he says.” You scoff. “I’m not a fool, Zoya. I know what he said, and none of it was a trick. He spoke to me like a friend, and last time he talked to me about potential openings within the Grisha ranks. I could have a position. Isn’t that excellent?” Zoya shakes her head once more. “It’s a trick. He won’t give you anything. Don’t tell me you’re actually going to believe what he says?”
You draw back from her now, all traces of excitement gone from you. “Why are you saying this? Maybe I don’t know if he truly means it or not, but you don’t know anything about this. Saints, I thought you might actually be happy for me.” Zoya almost winces at that. “I’m not- I would be happy for you if I thought this was something real, Y/N, but it’s not. Nothing is with him.” You can feel yourself rising up in anger. “Oh, and you would know about that, wouldn’t you? From all of the time you spent with him? Are you truly doubtful, Zoya, or do you just not want me to be involved with him because you don’t want me to have anything that you hadn’t had first?”
The words are coming out faster now, one after the other. Truth be told, it’s almost good to hear them aloud after so long keeping them inside. “I never had a problem with you being first in class, first in everything. I never will, but I assumed that you would extend that same courtesy to me. Why is it that we’re friends in everything, but the second I seem to get some sort of headway, you have to prove it wrong? Can’t I have anything that isn’t yours already?”
Zoya draws back as if you’ve slapped her. “That’s not how I feel. I’m just trying to keep you safe.” You want to laugh. “This is how you keep me safe? By taking everything away from me until I’m only in your shadow and nowhere else?” Zoya flings her hands in the air. “If it means he doesn’t get his hooks in you, yes! I would rather have you stay here forever than lose you.” You look at her, unbelieving. “And why is that? Because we’re such good friends that you’d trade my future for my complacency?”
Zoya’s voice is soft now, barely there at all. “Because I cannot stand to lose you. Because I love you, Saints damn it, and I’d rather have you hate me than never have you at all.” You stand there for a second, then another, then another. Your breath is sharp and harsh in your chest, but you cannot seem to say a single word. You try for a few, anyway. “You love me?” She nods once. “Yes.”
You do laugh now, incredulous. “Why didn’t you say so, you idiot? I love you too.” She looks almost surprised. “I thought- I thought you just wanted to be friends.” You shrug. All of your anger is receding away from you now, washing back into the banks after a flood. “I did, because I thought that’s all you wanted. I didn’t want to make it seem like I was only your friend because I had feelings for you.” Zoya stands there for a moment, then something almost like a sigh comes from her and she steps forward, wrapping her arms around you. “You generous, impossible fool. I can’t stand you.” You laugh, returning her embrace. “Of course not. You love me.”
requested by @villnella​
grishaverse tag list: someone who would be my squaller bestie @underc0vercryptid​, @darlinggbrekker, @cameronsails​, @aleksanderwh0r3​
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cassanovancats · 3 years ago
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felicitate. nine.
eight < current > ten
Dec. 24, 2017
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You make yourself comfortable on the rooftop, debating if you should go ahead and text your brother. He would be almost as disappointed as you were; Satoru had taken to calling himself the captain of your ship with Yuta and Toge, even coming up with a nickname that incorporated shortened versions of all three names. You sigh, deciding it’s probably best to not text him. He’s likely already worried about leaving you in charge, no need to add a worry about something that isn’t deadly.
A sudden yell disrupts your thoughts and you jump into position, nocking an arrow and aiming towards the scream. You hitch your breath at the sight: Geto is striding into your school alone, leaving a trail of headless assistants behind him. One of the bodies is familiar and you recognize her as the assistant that gave you chocolate with a bright smile after a mission with unfortunate timing left you covered in curse blood and your own. She didn't flinch or offer pity - just a single chocolate kiss. Now she is covered in gore and blood, her previously pristine white shirt coated with her own brain matter.
You feel your resolve hardens. Geto is a curse-user, a human at his core, but he also is a monster. The arrow flies an accurate course but the man dodges, leaving it to embed itself into the wall instead of his torso. He turns to your rooftop, calling out, “Ah, (y/n)! And here I thought your brother would lock you in a tower.” Geto unleashes a grade-one curse that looks similar to a wolf and sends it after you. He is infuriatingly unbothered by your presence and continues his steady gait into the school grounds.
You start running across the rooftops, jumping over gaps and dodging the curse’s attempts to bite you. The rooftop tiles bite into your hands and knees. It faintly registers that a nail broke when you almost missed a jump, narrowly avoiding falling to the ground.
Satoru didn’t say how long to keep this secret, but you assume now is a good time to give Maki and Yuta a heads-up. You spot Maki stepping away from a classroom, so you run there, drawing the curse after you. On the roof next to where she stands, you plant your feet and turn, suddenly drawing your katana and slicing at the wolf. It draws back, avoiding your attack before lunging suddenly. Its claws sink into your leg. You cry out in pain, falling to your knees. When the curse lunges again, this time aiming for your throat, you fall on your back and thrust your blade into its stomach. You force the blade down its body with a grunt, disemboweling the creature. The teeth around your throat loosen, but the dead weight of the curse dropping on you prevents you from getting up immediately. Guts slide out and onto you and you suppress a gag. You feel a lot like Carrie on prom night.
When you finally stagger to your feet, you see Maki has engaged Geto in a fight that she’s obviously losing. You cry her name and rush to her side. She doesn’t get a chance to acknowledge you as Geto, in one fluid moment, breaks her weapon and sends her flying. She falls to the ground as a ragdoll, bleeding heavily from her side and head. You watch her body land, horrified, before you’re snapped back into the fight rudely.
Geto is now the closest to you he’s been since you were a child, frightened and unable to communicate with the people around you. He feels some long-forgotten sense of pity as he slides the blade of his knife further into your stomach. “W-wh-?” You look at the handle sticking out of your body curiously, blood starting to leak from the corner of your mouth. The pain hasn’t begun to register but your body understands that you are unable to fight. You faint, missing the entrance of Panda and Toge by a few precious seconds.
When Yuta comes out from the classroom, he isn’t sure what he’s expecting to find. He felt a few earthquakes and thought it best to find you and Maki to wait out any aftershocks together. Yuta was sure it was to be a little awkward after his rejection, but also wanted to be sure you were okay. He didn’t expect to find you covered in blood, the same cute gym clothing you were wearing that morning when he rejected you ruined. A quick glance around and he sees the rest of his classmates, his friends, in similar form. Inumaki is clinging to consciousness.
Geto, the one who grabbed Yuta months earlier, stands surrounded by the bodies, hardly winded. “I truly wanted you to live, Okkotsu, but this is for the future of jujutsu.” Yuta wonders how he can fight this man. How can he protect his friends, the only ones to give him a chance since Rika, when Geto already destroyed the strongest people he knew. He was so, so weak compared to each of them.
Inumaki desperately calls a slurred version of his name and says, “Run away.” The fact that the command does nothing, that Yuta feels nothing, breaks him from his spiral. He summons Rika in a rage.
“I am going to kill you!” He declares. Yuta doesn’t think he has ever felt such anger and despair, the feeling of watching Rika die now multiplied by four.
Geto simply says, “You are going to die.”
-
A sudden pull on your stomach wakes you harshly. “Shit!” Your eyes snap open, to see a sheepish Panda holding the knife that was previously in your stomach. You automatically go to apply pressure on the wound but your hands find Maki’s already there, dressing the wound. “What happened?”
“The fight’s over, but we need to find Yuta,” Maki explains. “He must have healed all of us, but you still had the blade in you. It needed to be removed before you get up. All of us are going to be fine, (y/n), you can rest now.” She helps you to your feet and you cringe looking at your ruined outfit. Maki catches your pout and smiles, glad some things never change.
Toge comes to your side to take Maki’s place as your crutch. You hug him tightly, unable to express in words how relieved you are. He hugs back, equally overwhelmed after seeing what seemed like your corpse. Toge helps you limp along as you all start tracking Yuta’s residuals. Panda clears his throat and asks, “When did this happen?”
“Only a few days ago. Don’t act like you didn’t see this coming,” you explain with an eye-roll.
“No, I totally did. Just curious who won the bet.”
“If we didn’t just fight for our lives, I would kill you.” You four continue to try to have a light conversation until you come upon Yuta’s unconscious body. Toge helps you sit on the ground and you move his head onto your lap, muttering about checking for a concussion. All of you needed medical attention but you were desperate to help any way you could now.
Yuta begins to blink his eyes open and sits up urgently. “Your wounds… Panda! Your arm!” He seems to be working himself into a frenzy. You place a comforting hand on his shoulder as Panda explains that everyone will be okay. Yuta urgently looks over you, trying to determine how much blood was yours, before he seems satisfied.
“Thank you for saving us,” You whisper. His eyes fill with tears and you wonder how scared he must have been. You maintain eye contact, hoping to communicate how much you admire him, before Rika’s jumbled voice makes the both of you jump. Yuta stands, leaving the circle your class formed around him.
“Sorry to keep you waiting, Rika,” he says, approaching her.
“What’s wrong?” Maki asks, a little fearful at how resigned Yuta looks.
Yuta hums a little before answering, “In exchange for her power, I promised to go with her.”
“What?” You screech and the suddenness of the yell pains your wound. Your classmates join a chorus of disagreement. Panda and Inumaki both grab fistfuls of his shirt to prevent him from walking any closer to Rika. Instead of her usual retaliation for someone restraining Yuta, her form just falls away to reveal a young girl. Four of you are confused but Yuta just mumbles, “Rika?”
A clapping distracts from the drama. You turn as best you can with a hole in your stomach to see your brother without any eye wear approaching your group. “Congrats. You broke the curse,” he continues to clap and stands next to you.
“Who’re you?” Yuta and Maki ask, causing you to snort before you groan at the pain.
Your brother pouts before replying, “Everyone’s favorite good-looking Gojo-sensei. Do you not see the sibling resemblance?” He gestures between your face and his, before carefully putting you on his back. He doesn’t even flinch at the grime covering you transferring onto him as well, relieved to see you awake and alert. You rest your chin on his shoulder and listen to him explain.
“I thought Yuta was interesting, so I looked into his lineage. Apparently, you’re a descendant of Michizane Sugawara. So, super-distant, but we’re relatives!” You groan and hide your face in Satoru’s neck; the teasing to come will be unbearable.
Your classmates look dumbfounded at the information while Yuta just goes, “Who?”
“One of Japan’s big three vengeful spirits.”
“A big-shot sorcerer.”
“Tuna.”
“The annoying side of the family,” you add.
Your brother takes back control of the conversation. “Yuta, you’re right. Rika isn’t cursing you, you cursed her. When the curser severs the bond tying servant to master and the cursed doesn’t desire punishment, the curse is broken. Though it seems you figured that out by yourself.” He gestures at the little girl and Yuta.
“Oh my god,” Yuta collapses in tears. “It’s all my fault…. Hurting so many people, Geto coming after me, it’s all my - all my -” He begins to hyperventilate. Inumaki takes a step to comfort him, but before he can, Rika approaches and hugs his trembling form.
“Thank you, Yuta. For giving me time and letting me be by your side. I’ve been happier these past six years than I ever was alive. Good-bye, be well. And don’t come over too soon, ‘kay?” She gives a bright smile, toothy and pure as she dissolves into bright ashes. Yuta stares at where she stood, long after all the ashes disappeared and everyone else walked away.
“See you,” He says to himself, before getting up to follow his friends to Doctor Ieiri.
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venalier · 2 years ago
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FETTERS FOR FENRIS WOLF.
          when thrice the gods challenged the wolf, he displayed reluctance. “it looks to me as though i will gain no fame if i do tear apart such a slender band,” he said. “if it is made with art and trickery, then even if it does look thin, this band is not going on my legs.” 
          when thrice the gods challenged the wolf, he asked for an exchange. “but rather than you question my courage,” he said, “let someone put his hand in my mouth as a pledge, that this binding is done in good faith.”
                                                           —— ♡ ——
          stone whispers to stone in the deep night hours of garreg mach’s ancient cathedral. each footfall cries out up to soaring buttresses, as though the polished floor were only a reflection, and to walk on it was to walk inverted, steps whispered back from the clerestory.
          mystical a place as fódlan’s vaunted cathedral might be, though, the banality of night patrol necessarily dulls its magnificence. she’s lost count of how many times now she’s circled this perimeter, retracing the same paths and noting the same geometric landmarks engraved along the floor and lower walls, if she was ever counting to begin with. a pointed ochre triangle here, an icon of seiros there, hand outstretched in benediction. and though caeldori has never been one to shirk duty or relax in her responsibilities, she can’t help but wish, in part, to be elsewhere.
          a fable lingers on her mind — the afterimage of a collection of storybook myths she’s been reading lately, of old gods and towering giants, and a beast predestined to shed divine blood at world’s end, and thus who for its power had been feared by the gods, deceived into captivity. it would struggle in these chains until it was foretold to finally break free on the eve of the last great battle, full of malice and rage, and devour its captors.
          it had left her wondering: which had come first?
          the sudden urgent sound of someone — several someones — approaching at a run pull her from her fantastical philosophy debate. “what’s happened?” there’s no point in asking if something had, judging by the pale looks on the other guards’ faces. her hand is already going to her naginata.
          “relic— aubin’s relic— the vault’s empty!” the guardsmen’s first priority isn’t stopping to explain things to her, already rushing past her towards the hall to the east trancept. in the distance, she can hear the boom of doors shutting, closing off the floor’s side and rear exits. “fan out in pairs; it’s only been a minute; they can’t have gotten too far!”
          there weren’t enough people for her to have a pair, but now wasn’t the time to be dicing numbers. she takes off towards the west trancept to cover ground, dimly attempting to assess what kind of person would not only manage, but be bold enough, to take a heroes’ relic from under the church’s very nose.
       ♡   //    @aubins
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unholyplumpprincess · 4 years ago
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Behave
Wanted to write for Eivor desperately bc I love her. Also ty to @mika-aris for being my cheerleader during this!!!
!!!Minors please do not Like or Reblog as this is an adult work, please respect my boundaries!!!
Reblogs > Likes. Please Reblog if you hit Like- and plz do not look respectfully, leaving horny tags fuels me!
Summary: You and Eivor have always had a flirtatious relationship, resulting in many close encounters. As a hunter, you go on trips to feed the settlement, recruiting warriors to come with you. When you offer to Eivor, she offers a counter of a trade. Private lessons to teach you how to fight, and in return she will give you company. What a shock she's in for when you show her you know damned well how to fight- and how to pin a big girl like her. Or. In which you pin Eivor in a spar match and she's Very horny about it.
Fandom: Assassin’s Creed Valhalla
Relationship: Eivor/Reader
Warnings: R18+/NSFT, Eivor is genderfluid and fem presenting atm, Eivor has a penis, Reader is gender neutral and genitalia is ambiguous so all can enjoy, No penetration or anything just dry/clothed humping
Words: 4k
__________
You would always rather be the hunter than the prey. 
You were the hunter of your settlement inside the Raven Clan. Working alongside Petra and Wallace to ensure your entire settlement had the meat necessary for the feasts that were held often. The cattle could only birth so quickly, and the game within the forest could only be hunted so often before they, too, would deplete. Petra and Wallace stuck more to your island and its surroundings, while you preferred to venture off. 
This normally resulted in you recruiting a few others to tag along, not to help with the hunt, but to help with the load you would return with. The furs were turned to furs for beds, the bones turned to weapons or arrow tips. Nothing ever went to waste. 
The others you would recruit were simply to help cart back or boat back the hunts and to set up camp. And, of course, to provide intimidating company. You did not look to be a warrior yourself; You knew this. You did not have the rugged scarring of the others, or how they swung heavy axes over their shoulders and walked with swagger. But you were deadly with a bow, even deadlier with a blade in your hand. Silent, never startling your prey.
~Rest under the cut~
The only one who could hear you was the beloved Wolf-Kissed. Someone you had admired since back in your last settlement. Her braided red hair, all her tattoos, her crooked smile and the cocky prowess in her step. Or how she played with the little ones, chasing them in all her huge glory and her cloak making her appear all the larger. 
You were close enough with the Jarl’s right hand. Enough that Eivor would seek you out, not just for questions or archery tips, but just to sit with you. Like when you were sharpening blades outside in the nice weather, how you’d heard her stalking up to you. She’d make conversation, her eyes watching you sharpen the blade and you looking up at her from under your lashes. 
“Skilled hands.” She’d tell you, watching how you’d spin the knife in your grip with just your fingers. 
You’d smile back up at her, sweet as could be. “Is it the skill that captures your attention, Wolf-Kissed? Or is it the implications beneath said skill that does?” Before you’d flip the knife in your grasp with a little toss and hold the hilt out to her. Always delighting in the smirk on her lips and her dark green eyes looking you up. 
“A question I am sure you would like the answer to, hunter.” She’d tease back, taking the blade from you with her calloused fingers brushing your hand. 
The flirting was heavy between you two. You suspected she merely had a strong sexual appetite, something you could satisfy. Yet, she never acted. An eternal tease. 
Whether she was denying herself for the sake of denial. Or if she truly just had a flirtatious, friendly relationship with you was a question you never thought you’d get an answer to. 
The question that leads to your answer is one asked in the longhouse. 
A feast is going on at the time. Warriors and civilians alike enjoy the night of boosting morale. Someone is singing, someone is playing a lyre, another is telling tales of their battles and memories of the gods aiding them in said battles. Little ones are delighted by all, running about and through legs and giggling up a storm as they chase Mouse around. The large, white, domesticated wolf that seemed keen on staying in Eivor’s room lest it was to play with the children. 
You’re sitting in your own corner on a wooden box, your feet propped up and one leg over the other. You work on your whittling project, carefully carving the raven’s wings with each painstaking feather. You like the noise around you, your own plate of food and mead long since downed. Your journal to your other side, containing details of where you were to hunt next. A rough sketch of a map and location you wanted to go to, and who pledged to help. 
“Not enjoying yourself?” Comes that low, raspy voice in its forever tease. You peek up through your lashes to see Eivor approaching, a sway to her hip. Like a prowling wolf. 
“On the contrary, I am. I like when it gets loud.” You tease back on your last words, flashing her a smile and enjoying the way her eyes narrow in challenge.  
You move, sitting upright and kicking the box over to her that you had been using for your legs. Eivor bows her head politely, taking the seat offered and swinging her cup back to drink her last of mead before setting it to the side. 
“You are recruiting for your next hunt?” She hums to you, glancing over to your journal. You follow her gaze briefly before returning your eye down to the tedious task of carefully carving out feathers. 
“Yes...Why? Are you interested in attending this time?” You speak as you lift the charm in your hand, twisting it about in the light to get a good look at it. You draw it back to your lap when satisfied, looking towards her with a cocked head. “Or do the gods call you out once more, no time for play?” 
Eivor’s sparkle in her eye returns at your playfulness and you like the look she gives you. That slow glance down to your lips, down your neck and body. She gives you a once over, a hum to her throat and leaning back against the wall with crossed arms as she does it. Making herself appear bigger, broader than she already is. A tone of amusement in her voice when she speaks. “Play time is what you call it?” 
“Thought pups like you would call it that. Free to run and wrestle with who you please.” You struggle not to smirk at calling her a pup. Watching her eyes narrow but seeing a slight darken to her cheeks. 
Oh? Perhaps the Wolf-Kissed had something you could dig your teeth into. 
After a moment, you press again. “Are you interested in joining? You would not hunt. I merely request aid in bringing my boon back to camp. Just some muscle and company with a pretty face.” 
“Perhaps. If you would accept a trade.” Eivor replies smoothly, her eyes sweeping you over and making you pause at what she might be implying. You lick your lips, suddenly much more interested in her than your project. You set it in your lap, giving her your full attention and cocking your head to glance her over. 
“Loki kisses your gaze this evening,” You speak with a narrow of your gaze at the smirk playing on her lips. The sparkle in her eye. Gods- any that would hear you- she is deathly beautiful. “But, I shall bite. What limb must I give up to relish in your company, o’ Wolf-Kissed?” 
“You would give a limb for my company, hunter?” It’s spoken as a jest, a light tease. A grin now reaching the apples of her cheeks, her sharp canines on display. 
Gods help you, you wanted her to sink her teeth into your flesh. 
“And you would give up your important duty of establishing alliances just to help me drag back prey,” You quip back quickly, leaning on your knees now so you can lean forward towards her. Your heart stutters when her eyes fall to your lips, but you mock obliviousness. “Seems we are on equal footing of desiring company.” 
There’s a moment of pause where Eivor just looks at you. Her tongue flicking across her lips and a smile playing on her lips. She pushes from the wall, leaning on her own knees. Close enough to you that you can feel her breath when she speaks. 
“I am told that you fight well with a dagger and bow. That your skills put down wild animals with ease- no matter the size. And yet, those around worry you do not know how to fight without your tools.” She speaks quiet, like it was just for you two to hear. You hold back a smile, biting your tongue as you realize where this is going. “Private lessons. I want to train you. Make sure you can hold your own in a fight if you lose your weaponry.” 
“And since when do you believe the local gossip, Eivor?” You murmur, pushing your luck by shifting a bit to lean the tiniest bit closer. Relishing in the way you can hear her breath still, how you watch her pupils dilate for more reasons than just the candlelit hall.  
“I accept your trade,” You say, leaning back and stretching your arms above your head to work out kinks from sitting there for so long. You pretend you do not see the way Eivor’s eyes sweep your frame. A hungry wolf. “When shall we begin this ‘training’ I seem to oh so desperately need?” 
“Tomorrow at dawn. Meet me at the nearby clearing.” She speaks as she moves to stand. You watch her, your eyes following her just as hungry and noting the sway in her step. Even as she joins the others and gets rowdy with them. Slaps on the back or grasping someone’s nape and fondly bumping their heads together.  
You sigh quietly to yourself when your heart flutters. Letting a breath out you didn’t know you had been holding. You’d...always wanted an excuse to get closer to her. Something more meaningful than just conversations. To be able to touch her in some form or another. 
Regardless. You were quite looking forward to seeing Eivor’s face when she realized that you weren’t just some hunter. You knew how to fight, and you did it well. You were ready to protect the settlement and use whatever was on hand. Yes, you fought better with your weaponry. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t know how to knock someone on their ass and the get the upper hand. 
The bigger they are... 
You enjoy the rest of the feast with a feeling of eyes following you. Whenever you casually glance over you can see how her eyes follow you, peeking over her horn with her lips quirking into smirk. 
You wanted to wipe that look right off her face. 
That night, you sleep well. Rising early in the morning like you always did to get a good start of the day. You go through your morning routine of waking Petra and Wallace, which goes about as well as every morning. With both of them grumbling at you and Petra’s hand waving you away. You set about setting everything out for them to remind them of the stuffing of a few heads to be done today before leaving a note saying you’ll be out for the day. 
The clearing was a ten-minute ride on horseback. Your beloved mare, Daffodil Violet Glenda Charolette the First, or merely Daffy for short, carried you there. All the while you lovingly chatted to her about what a good girl she was. Even doing so as you hopped off once you reached the tree line where you’d have to do the rest on foot. Tying her up and patting her side as she nosed at you in a little push. “Yeah, yeah, I’m going. You make a massacre of these flowers- know they’re your favorite, big girl.” 
The walk from there is just a few minutes. You know you’re close when you hear the stream nearby. The break in the tree line revealing a near perfect circle of clearing. Beautiful little yellow and purple flowers in bloom among the wild flowers and grass. Butterflies fluttered about, the warm sun casting a beautiful glow on the world as it raised above the trees to shine its light onto the world. 
In the middle of the clearing was Eivor. Already setting a fur up to the side and deerskins that you assumed were full of water. She shrugs out of her heavy fur and armor, setting that beside the fur. Her weaponry follows, axe and shield lain down cautiously. 
“If I did not know any better, I would assume you were trying to court me.” You speak teasingly as you approach, watching her lift her head to look at you with a sparkle in her eyes. “What? No flowers?” 
“I did not take you as the type to want flowers.” Eivor chuckles softly, standing to greet you. She towers over you when you approach, before she bends down to pluck a wildflower from the ground. Tucking it behind your ear when you are close enough and making your cheeks burn. “Forgive me. I shall remember for next time.” 
You scoff at her, despite your heart’s pounding and your face burning. You lightly shove her, laughing when she catches your arm to tug you closer, leaning down towards your face. A form of intimidation, despite her grin. Her eyes looking down towards your lips... 
You lightly bump your forehead to hers. Just hard enough to hurt to make her let you go before you move away from her. Getting some distance before she can grab you again. It’s worth the headache you’d have later just to see her bewildered expression. Going from startled, shocked, to impressed when Eivor offers you a crooked grin. “So. You do know how to fight. This makes things more fun.” 
“As I told you before, O’ Wolf-Kissed,” Your voice coming low and teasing as you shed yourself of your cloak to give yourself more freedom. “Do not listen to gossip.” 
Eivor is bigger than you, broader. She towers over you. It would be foolish to charge her, even while she’s taken off guard. It would be like hitting a wall. Instead, you stalk around her, letting her eyes watch your every move. You feel like you do when you are hunting, seeing a great bear ready for your dagger to swiftly end its life. 
But there are no weapons here. Only bare hands and violence. 
Eivor’s weakness, as you know, is she is not a patient woman. Seen when her fingers twitch, starting to growl at you when you don’t immediately attack her first. She charges you when you come in front of her, and you assume she expects her sheer size to take you out like a raging bull. You wait to feel the wind brush you to signal her closeness, quickly moving to the side and sweeping out your leg, forcing her to trip over your calf. 
“Oldest trick in the book, Eivor, come on.” You tease. Only to yelp when she grabs your ankle and yanks you down onto the ground. You both laugh as you roll quickly, moving too quick for her to yank you into her grasp. 
Her size and strength should have had you down before you could blink. But the gossip seemed to forget that though you did not raise your blade to man, you knew how to get your grasp out of a raging bear or wolf. And your dearest Wolf-Kissed looking at you with a snarl and laughter in her voice as she lungs for you was no different. 
You two go tumbling on the ground, ending up being locked in a grasp where you can keep slipping just out of her grip. Until she becomes too impatient, losing her sense when you keep slipping. It leaves her open, vulnerable. 
You strike then. 
You force your weight forward to knock against her, hitting your knee into her stomach to make her gasp sharply as her air is knocked from her. It gives you enough time to use her own unbalanced weight against her, knocking her onto her back and climbing quickly on top of her. Straddling her stomach and slamming your knees into her hands to keep them underneath you and at her sides, knowing your leg power was much better than your upper body. You slam both your hands on either side of her head in the grass to keep your balance, caging her. 
You’re both panting. Your breath mingling and your shadow casting over her. It doesn’t stop the sun from reaching her, kissing her tanned flesh. Her cheeks are flushed from exertion, her red hair sprawled around her and giving her the image of a lion. Her gaze is half lidded, her lips parted with each breath and her eyes flickering downwards towards your lips. 
“Caught you.” You huff out, trying to ignore the feeling in your stomach at her gaze. Hungry, wanting, with a subtle tilt of her head back. It lets you see the glow of sweat clinging to her, and your mouth waters with the need to taste the salt of her skin. 
“So you have.” She murmurs, her tone soft and low. It does no favors for how you feel right now. “And what do you plan to do with your caught prey?” Her tone is even lower, that damned smirk playing on her lips. She could fling you off if she wanted to. She was strong enough to. She’s not even struggling.  
“That depends,” You murmur, leaning a bit closer to gauge her reaction. And judging by how she tips her head, her lashes fluttering and her lips parting, you take these all as good signs. You lean closer, close enough your noses brush and you can see her sun kissed freckles and her vivid green irises. “How long will you let me pretend you are prey?” 
“As long as you are atop me? I cannot see myself anywhere else today.” She says a bit too breathily to just be exertion. 
You don’t hesitate to lean forward the rest of the way to press your lips to hers. Eivor meets you with hunger, her hands finally working their way out from under your knees to reach up and cup your face. Your heart stutters, her calloused thumbs brushing against your cheeks as you reach to cup the side of her neck. 
She tastes like berries from this morning, sweet and tart against your tongue. You moan into her mouth, parting your lips and matching her pace as you lick your way into her mouth. She mimics your sound, low and guttural in her throat with one of her hands falling from your cheek to grip onto the nape of your neck instead. 
Eivor’s sighs into your mouth make you shudder at how pliant she’s being. When the kiss is broken, you don’t restrain yourself from kissing down from her mouth, over her cheek, down to her jawline where she willingly tilts her head for you. Allowing you to sink your teeth lightly into the tattooed flesh there and tracing downwards with your tongue.  
Her moan when you sink your teeth into her neck makes your head spin. How her hands slide down your back, over the curves of your side to grip your hips and dragging them downwards. You don’t stop her, letting her hands guide you down from straddling her abdomen to instead her hips. The weight of your ass pressing against her. 
Eivor groans low in her throat, and you move from her neck to kiss her again. Letting her hands guide your hips back and forth, grinding against her and feeling your body tremble with the heat coursing through you. Feeling that vague hardness under your body, slotting directly against you. Vaguely hidden by the thickness of both of your pairs of clothing. 
“Eivor-” You moan as you part the kiss from her. Her hands only grip you harder, her hips starting to come up into you every time she jerks you forward. Hard enough that you can spread your legs a bit more across the broadness of her hips and feeling the friction with her. 
You bite your lip, letting your body fall forward so you can rest your face in her neck. Your arms keep you propped up on your forearms, your fingers sinking into her hair to pull on it. Eivor growls in your ear, turning her head to press her lips to your temple and starting to murmur things to you as her hips come up against you. Like she’s trying to fuck you through your clothes. 
Her deep voice makes you dizzy all the while she murmurs, ‘There you are, I have you.’ ‘Wish these clothes were not upon our bodies.’ ‘Want to taste you, want to make you cum-’ ‘Ambrosia will not taste nearly as good as I know you shall taste.’ 
There’s a wet patch on the front of your clothes as your eyebrows knit and you cling to her. Panting as you feel the fluttering in your abdomen, your hips starting to move in time with her tugs until you’re practically humping her. 
You yelp as you’re rolled over, Eivor’s body like that of a bear in how it can cover yours easily. Her forearm presses into the ground beside your head to keep herself up, her other hand gripping your hip to force you to tilt them upwards so her own can hump against you. Like this, she can get deeper strokes, feeling the muscles in her body flexing when you reach up to loop your arms around her neck and dig your fingers into her hair. 
You cum first, a cry from your lips that is quickly silenced when the hand by your head comes over your mouth. You moan into her hand frantically, your hands moving to grip her wrist as your eyes roll into the back of your head and you’re cumming in your clothes. Your hips stuttering upwards into her frantic, harsh humps against you until she’s snarling like a wolf. Her features scrunching up, eyebrows knitting as her hips stutter and she’s cumming with you. 
You can feel the wetness against the front of her pants, pressed flush against you and allowing you to feel the hard outline of her through her clothes. 
You’re both panting. Eivor moves to press her forehead to yours, her eyes closed while you peek at her through your lidded eyes. It’s quiet, a shared moment between you two until you break it with a small laugh. “You did not actually believe I needed training, did you, Eivor?” You say it accusingly, watching the way her lips quirk into a smile that she hides by turning her face to press into your neck. 
“By the gods- private lessons my arse.” You laugh breathily, the dull thrumming of your heartbeat still felt in your body. You can hear her chuckling into your neck, a kiss pressed there that makes your heart flutter a bit harder. You truly did love her. 
“Private lessons in trade for my company on your hunt,” Eivor murmurs, a reminder of the trade as she kisses up to your ear to nip it. No better than a grinning pup as she speaks low into your ear. “Perhaps you do need training. Shall your silver tongue work better elsewhere than just speaking insults towards me?” 
You flush red, shoving at her and taking advantage of her weakened state to roll her back over. You wrap a hand loose around her neck, straddling her hips and delighting in how she looks at you so hungrily. A wolfish grin upon her lips as you huff, “If anyone needs ‘training’, it is you. Shall I teach you to behave like a good pup, o’ Wolf-Kissed?” 
You delight in the way she bites her lip. How Eivor groans low in her throat like the idea of being made to submit under you was the goal all along. 
You put pressure on her throat, delighting in the shocked, aroused look crossing her features when you growl out low. “I was not made to obey. But you, Eivor? I shall teach you to heel.” 
And oh, you would make this puppy howl. 
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ayuuria · 4 years ago
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Yashahime Translation: Animage Magazine May 2021 Issue
Please do not repost this translation without my consent! This includes screenshots of any type and amount. If you wish to share this translation, simply link to this post.
For more information regarding the use of my translations, click here.
The Yashahimes’ Future
The three Yashahimes who carry both demon and human blood: Towa, Setsuna, and Moroha. The three of them have varying personalities, environments in which they were raised in, and goals for their actions. However, through the shared task of demon slaying, they slowly begin to accept one another. Though they are not a perfect “Close, in sync team”, trust has certainly budded between the girls who, together, have overcome any difficult situation. Even Kirinmaru’s attack that killed Setsuna in one stroke could not sever the bond that connects the three. Towa especially, who received a broken Tenseiga from Sesshōmaru, appears to have not yet given up on Setsuna’s life. Although it looks like the girls will still continue to face hardships in the future, we want them to clear the way to a happy future with their own hands.
“Hanyō no Yashahime” entered a short break, leaving behind many points of interest such as Setsuna’s shocking death, the broken Tenseiga entrusted to Towa, and the continued separation of Moroha and her parents. Let’s consolidate the existing mysteries and wait for the second chapter (season)!
Higurashi Towa
Faced with the death of her beloved little sister, Setsuna, her demonic blood awakens for the first time. Until now, she had been using the demon sword, Kikujūmonji, as her weapon but what is this blade… …? (referring to the promo picture for season 2)
Series Composition: Katsuyuki Sumisawa Q&A
The Yashahimes’ story with continuous ups and downs. In addition to reviewing everything up until now, please tell us about the backstory and hints to the second chapter (season)!
Q. Where do Towa, Setsuna, and Moroha normally spend the night?
A. Towa freeloads at Kaede’s house. Setsuna stays at the demon slayer’s headquarters. It’s just that she can’t sleep so she probably keeps watch outside at night. Moroha lives at the corpse shop.
Q. How far apart is Kaede’s village and the corpse shop?
A. Kaede’s village is in the land of Musashi so in terms of modern geography, imagine around Tokyo’s Nakano and Suginami ward. Compared to that, the corpse shop is in the harbor so around Shinagawa ward or maybe even Yokohama. It seems the three of them frequently met up but there’s actually quite a distance. Each of them had different goals behind their actions too.
Q. When Towa, Setsuna, and Moroha first met, how was Moroha able to figure out that the two of them were Sesshōmaru’s daughters?
A. Probably through “smell”. Sesshōmaru is well known among demons and Moroha knows that Sesshōmaru is her father’s older brother. However, Moroha still doesn’t know that Sesshōmaru is the one who trapped her parents within the black pearl.
Q. Does Moroha know her parents’ names?
A. She does. When Inuyasha and Kagome were approached by Kirinmaru and Sesshōmaru, Awa no Hachiemon (aka Hachi), the racoon dog, took Moroha to the wolf demon tribe where she was raised. That being said, Kōga probably told her.
Q. Doesn’t Moroha want to meet her parents?
A. She thinks her parents are dead. That’s why her thoughts are “There’s no point obsessing over someone who’s dead”. Hachiemon the racoon dog, didn’t watch the details of the incident to the end and assumed that “If Sesshōmaru and Kirinmaru were their opponents, they’re probably not alive now.” That’s what Moroha was told through Kōga.
Q. Why is the instrument that Setsuna plays the violin?
A. When creating the scenario, I wanted some sort of “gift” from the modern era as “something to connect the modern and feudal eras”. Therefore, I decided to give Moroha the giant backpack as Kagome’s daughter and Setsuna an instrument. In addition, an instrument that absolutely didn’t exist in the feudal era was better, so I chose the violin. There of course won’t be violins in Japan and even in the West, it had a different shape than it does now. Plus, before the current story was solidified, I had thought of a plot where the modern era was the setting so it’s a remnant of that.
Q. Did Mama Moe teach Setsuna the song she always plays on her violin?
A. While she learned how to play the violin from Mama Moe, the song was not something she learned (from her). Rather Setsuna is playing a song she once heard based off her memory. Where she heard it… please wait for the second chapter (season)!
Q. With Kanemitsu no Tomoe as a medium for Setsuna and the rouge being suggested for Moroha, each of them has had their demonic blood sealed. What about the seal for Towa’s demonic blood?
A. Towa’s is not sealed. Moreover, her demonic blood had not yet awakened. That’s where in episode 24, her demonic blood awakened for the first time with Setsuna’s death being the trigger. However, that was in an out-of-control state. Going forward, how “Sesshōmaru’s blood” flowing within her will manifest itself will be something worth noting.
Q. Why does everyone call Towa and the others “Yashahime”?
A. Ever since the spirit of the Tree of Ages called them as such in episode 4, everyone started calling them that, no matter who they spoke to. At first, even Towa and the others were like “We’re not Yashahime” or “Are you referring to us?” but as they got addressed that repeatedly, they gradually accepted the name.
Q. Kohaku’s* older sister, Kin’u, is a nun but what does his other older sister, Gyokuto, do?
*Translator’s Note: I think the publisher made a mistake and meant to say Hisui
A. She shoulders the responsibility of helping Sango create the weapons for demon slaying, delivering those weapons to the other slayers, accepting demon slaying requests around the area, and collecting information on demon sightings.
Q. Is Kirinmaru a demon of Japan?
A. No. I think talking like this will be easier to understand. Kirinmaru is one of the few greater demons who is aware that the earth is round. In that era, the only ones who have a sense of this are probably just Kagome, Towa, and Kirinmaru. Having circled the globe many times, Kirinmaru, who had traveled around the world, met the Dog General at the very end in the land at the farthest end (of the earth), Japan. Ever since then, he has remained in Japan so it could be said that he’s a demon of Japan, but his existence is on a bigger scale than that. Kirinmaru frequently reads Western books and he orders those from various places around the world. The one who buys them is Riku. Naturally, I’m sure that not only does Riku secretly read the Western books in the library, but Kirinmaru wouldn’t reproach him for such a small thing either. In episode 7, Riku called the apple a “Forbidden Fruit” but of course, I’m sure Kirinmaru has read the bible before. That’s most likely because he’s been alive since the era of myth so he may have seen Buddha or Jesus Christ in the flesh. There’s probably no way he saw Adam and Eve eat the forbidden fruit though… … (laughs).
Q. Point blank, what is the relationship between Kirinmaru and Riku? In a reflection of the past (200 years ago), it seemed Riku didn’t have any emotions. What exactly was that?
A. This will be revealed in the second chapter (season) as well but to give you a little hint, Riku started taking care of Zero after the Dog General died and as he healed her, he gradually began to have emotions. That’s why Riku’s way of thinking was influenced by Zero, such as “You have to destroy those that you love”.
Q. Zero lost her demonic powers when she created the Rainbow Pearls. Then what was the power she was using when she fought?
A. Zero was using the power of hexes. In this world, there is not only demonic power but all sorts of powers such as spiritual power and Buddhist power and each of them is separate. What she used was a power similar to charms and Inyougogyō**.
** Translator’s Note: Yin and Yang and the five Chinese elements: metal, wood, water, fire, and earth.
Q. Why did someone like Kirinmaru, who values reason, have the Four Perils, who had sleazy personalities, as subordinates?
A. Kirinmaru’s mind is preoccupied with a “certain matter” that’s important so he doesn’t really care about anything else. Hence, he doesn’t remember every single demon that has challenged or served under him and he doesn’t care what kind of person they were.
Q. In episode 21, it was surprising when Towa said “I like you (Riku)!”. To put it frankly, what do Towa and Riku think of each other?
A. Towa thinks Riku is “Riku”. She doesn’t perceive him as being part of Kirinmaru’s group. On the other hand, Riku thinks Towa is “The lady Yashahime that will slay Kirinmaru”. That’s why he addresses her as “Lady Towa”. Currently, there are no romantic feelings between the two of them. Just that, there’s probably “affection” from Riku to Towa.
Q. Why does Riku think “I only kill those I love”?
A. Because “Those who are loved vanish beautifully”. That is what Zero said in episode 23. To Zero, death is sad but to Riku, there’s no difference between dying and living and that they’re the same. Based on that, Riku came to think “You have to destroy those that you love” and he chooses to “kill” as an expression of love. That might be quite difficult to understand.
Q. Why is Sesshōmaru so cold to his daughters?
A. Just as a lion drops its cubs into a bottomless ravine, a demon’s feeling is that they only raise the child that gains strength from hardship. That is the “Rite of Courage and Cowardice”. It’s a little different from the feeling we humans have. That’s why hating his daughters or purposely tormenting them is certainly not the case.
Q. Although, isn’t separating the babies from their mother immediately after birth or having them fight the strongest beast king of the eastern land, Kirinmaru, a little too much?
A. If you watch the kabuki play “Renjishi” I think you will get it immediately. Anime is fine, but I would like to recommend the traditional arts that have ceaselessly been passed down since ancient Japanese times. Even if going to see them is difficult, researching on the internet is easy. Even the phrase “Rite of Courage and Cowardice” will show up in there. It seems that in this world, there’s no people who love their children more than Japanese people. Perhaps that’s why it can’t be helped that the way Sesshōmaru is raising his children feels very cold. However, those who watched the “Inuyasha” series I think will know but Sesshōmaru’s hearing and smell are exceedingly exceptional. He has the ability to immediately rush in, no matter how far the distance.
Q. Lastly, please tell us how production for the second chapter (season) is going?
A. Currently, we’re writing the second half of the script for the second chapter (season). The whole staff are eagerly working under this difficult Corona crisis. In the second chapter (season), we would like to create a script that is particular on the details as much as possible. In the previous series, there were many self-contained demon slaying stories but for the second chapter (season), we’ve changed the structure of the story so that it progresses with the feelings of the various characters intertwining together, just like in “Inuyasha The Final Act”. Hence, I think the impression of the story will change quite a bit. Please wait until the broadcast to see what kind of story it will be!
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freddyfreebat · 4 years ago
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Jack Dylan Grazer Discovers Who He Is in Luca Guadagnino's “We Are Who We Are”
After supporting roles in the It and Shazam!, the young actor shifts gears with his turn as a capricious army brat in the Call Me By Your Name director's new HBO series.
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by Iana Murray / Photography by Nik Antonio  —  September 14, 2020
A few years ago, Jack Dylan Grazer took a trip to the movie theater. He was in Toronto and it was one of his days off from filming Shazam!, the DC comedy in which he plays the shape-shifting hero’s foster brother. He decided to watch Call Me By Your Name, and he immediately fell for it. Grazer took note of the director’s name that appeared in the credits—Luca Guadagnino—and turned to his mother.
“I want to work with him,” he told her. With eerie prescience, she assured him: “You will.”
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Whether Grazer, now 17, has a knack for manifestation, or it was all just happenstance, his wish came true in the form of We Are Who We Are, Guadagnino’s coming of age drama which follows a group of army brats living on an American military base in Italy. Thematically, the show is something of a spiritual successor to Call Me By Your Name: Grazer plays Fraser, a tempestuous 14-year-old with a pair of headphones constantly plugged in his ears. He’s the new arrival at the base with his mothers (Chloë Sevigny and Alice Braga), and quickly forms a deep bond with his neighbour, Caitlin (Jordan Kristine Seamon), as they both wrestle with their sexuality and identity in the midst of domestic troubles and teenage debauchery.
“He’s an enigma to himself,” Grazer says of his character. “He doesn’t really understand a lot of the things he does but he’s so forthright so he convinces himself that he knows everything. He feels like other people don’t deserve his intelligence. But he’s also very volatile and aggressive at times, and not because he’s coming from an angry place but because he’s constantly questioning who he is.”
If Fraser is just beginning his coming of age when we first meet him, Grazer is inching closer to the end. Starring in enormous blockbusters including IT, he became the Loser Club’s resident hypochondriac at age 12 and a superhero’s sidekick by 15. His films have grossed a combined total of over $1.5 billion. Suddenly the stakes are multiplied tenfold during what are ostensibly, and horrifyingly, the most awkward years of your life. Every misstep is now being monitored, examined through a microscope of millions. (See: His 3.8 million fans on Instagram, to say nothing of the countless stan accounts.) Child fame is a disarming transaction like that: a stable career and all the other perks of being a celebrity, but at the cost of normalcy. That unalleviating pressure forces a kid to mature fast.
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Grazer is acutely aware of this fact, admitting outright that he’s “not a normal person.” But he wouldn’t have it any other way.
“I became 70 when I was 7!” he laughs. “I don’t know if I really had much of a childhood. But I didn’t want to. I wanted to grow up really fast.”
Nevertheless, he’s still 17. When we meet over Zoom, his shoulder length curls are damp and disheveled (he just got out of the shower), his black painted fingernails contrast with his brightly-lit, white bedroom as he rests his face on his hand. It’s a Saturday morning and he looks tired: It’s his first week back at school, which has traded classrooms for hours of video calls reminiscent of the one we’re currently on. “It feels like the days are shorter because the teachers don’t want to torture their students by keeping them on a computer for six hours a day,” he tells me. “You do miss the social aspect of being at school.”
If you were to judge Grazer by what’s out there on the internet, you’d expect an anarchic and relentless bundle of energy. A quick YouTube search brings up results like “jack dylan grazer being a drama queen” and “jack dylan grazer being chaotic in interviews for 4 and a half minutes straight.” He trolled a YouTube gamer on Instagram Live. His TikToks are inscrutable.
But here, he’s incredibly earnest, as he excitedly talks about his skateboarding hobby (a skill he picked up after auditioning for Mid90s) and his attempts to learn the flute (“I need to learn how to read sheet music, but it’s like reading Hebrew!”). He’s calm and thoughtful, as if this project we’re discussing requires a shift in sensibility.
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For Grazer, acting had always simply been fun. While other kids might take up a sport or get hooked on video games, he performed in musical theater with the Adderley School because he “just wanted to play.” His roles so far have been reflective of his carefree approach to the job: Up until now, he’s portrayed best friends with biting one-liners, or the younger version of the protagonist in a flashback. IT is a prime example of both. In the horror franchise, Grazer plays a neurotic germaphobe running from a fear-eating clown, but in reality, the film felt like “summer camp.” Both films never felt like work; he just learned his lines and got to hang out on extravagant sets with his best friends. Likewise, school amounted to being pulled off set by a teacher in between takes to cram in the mandatory hours.
But with We Are Who We Are, he steps into his first leading role, one that required him to convey longing and confusion through Elio-like physicality and subtext. It’s abnormal to talk about the show as a turning point for an actor who isn’t even a legal adult yet, but Grazer explains that the show required him to radically change his approach to acting. He spent six months in Italy (“It felt like I was in Call Me By Your Name.”) and built up the character beyond what was on the page in collaboration with Guadagnino. “His philosophy is that we know our characters better than anyone else—even the writers—because we are the characters essentially,” he explains.
In many ways, Grazer absorbed that philosophy entirely. He describes the experience less as a performance and more like a “rebirth”—perhaps even an attempt at method acting. Over those months in Italy, the distinctions between actor and character gradually became indistinguishable. “I had no other choice but to act and surrender to Fraser entirely and throw Jack Dylan Grazer out the window,” he says. “I would go out and get a coffee as Fraser and walk like Fraser. That was just me trying to get into [character], but then I slipped at some point and just became Fraser.”
One day on set, he looked at himself in the mirror, and the hardened kid standing there with a bleach-blond dye job and oversized shorts was unrecognizable to him. He could only see Fraser. While talking about his character, he seems to unintentionally switch pronouns, from “he” to “I”, as if the two still remain one and the same.
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The process was so transformative that it forced him to re-evaluate himself entirely. “I never really struggled with identity before,” Grazer tells me. “But I think the show opened up my eyes to question myself. Being Fraser forced me to question what I wanted and what I stood for and what I believed in. At some points, the show bled into reality.”
When asked how he has changed, he takes a pause and a pensive swivel in his armchair, unsure of how to answer. “I think I was more ignorant before I did the show,” he says, and he leaves it at that.
Coming of agers are a particularly well-trodden genre, but there’s a naturalistic, raw energy to We Are Who We Are that is distinctive from what we’ve seen before. Each character quietly struggles with their own problems and growing pains—for Fraser, it’s his sexuality. Caught in a fraught relationship with his lesbian mother and an infatuation with another man, his story doesn’t tick off the familiar beats. His personal discovery is instead internal and intimate. "I think every single person born as a boy has this guard. It’s this guard that they don’t even realize they have, where they’re initially like, ‘Being gay? I could never.’ But we’re all born as humans who are attracted to whatever we’re attracted to," he says. "I think that’s how Fraser interprets it as well. Yes, he’s reserved and nervous about it in the beginning because he’s unlocking this new idea for himself. He’s figuring it out, and that’s what you see in the show: him coming to terms with this idea."
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As our conversation winds to a close, I ask him if Martin Scorsese ever visited the set—his daughter, Francesca, plays the confident cool girl of the show’s teen cohort—and his eyes widen. “That was actually a really stressful day,” he divulges. Still, he revels in the memory, speaking so fast it’s like someone has put him on 2.5x speed as he shows off his impersonation of Guadagnino. The director was so nervous about Scorsese’s presence that production halted that day.
“Luca was like, ‘I cannot do this today because Martin Scorsese is on my set. I don’t know what to do, this is not good for me. I will have a panic attack before the day ends,’” Grazer says in his best Italian accent. “It’s like if you’re a painter and Van Gogh shows up.” 
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Admittedly, Grazer is also a self-proclaimed superfan of the Wolf of Wall Street director, and afterwards, he got to spend several days with his idol, as they went on lavish restaurant outings in Italy and talked about anything and everything.
He takes a second to compose himself. A giddy, Cheshire cat smile spreads across his face. The kid in him comes flooding back.
“...Oh my god!” he yells. “I met Martin Scorsese!”
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i-drink-and-i-write-fics · 4 years ago
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The Wolf & The Hound
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Chapter 4: Blessed Name Day
Summary: Ever since your conversation with Sansa, Sandor has disappeared. Was she right?
Notes: First update on the new blog!
The next two weeks were so crazy preparing for Sansa’s coronation that you barely noticed that Sandor wasn’t around as much as before. It crossed your mind as you lied down in bed at the end of the night, but you were so exhausted from the day that you fell asleep before your mind could begin to panic. 
But it was felt, on a subconscious level. Your protective shadow was not there and it left you cold. Maybe Sansa was wrong. Maybe it wasn’t you that he wanted to court, but he told Sansa that to hide his true motives. 
The morning of the ceremony, you were up long before dawn and dressed so you could race to Sansa’s room to help her. As Brienne was the only woman of the Queen’s Guard she met you at the door and entered a step behind.
“Good morning, my lady. Are you ready to begin your day?” You curtsied shortly after you entered the room, Sansa standing next to the window to look out over the courtyard. 
“Good morning, ___. Yes, please. We have a long day ahead of us. Ser Brienne? While ____ tends to me, can you please have the kitchen bring up breakfast for all of us?”
“Yes, my lady,” Brienne bowed and left the room.
While Brienne was gone, you went to work filling Sansa’s bath with hot water, bathing and dressing her, and finally brushing her hair as Brienne returned with a member of the kitchen staff carrying a huge tray of food. Sansa wanted to wear her hair unbound as she wanted all the attention on her new crown and gown. So you gently curled the ends.
You then helped her dress in her dark grey dress that had many representations of the North. From the red leaves of the Weirwood Trees to a sleeve made of crow feathers to the metallic bodice that was a mirror of Weirwood branches. One sleeved looked like fish scales to represent her mother while the collar looked like a dire wolf for her father. She was beautiful.
If she was nervous, Sansa never let on. Holding her head high as you busied yourself getting her ready for the ceremony. You then stepped back so Brienne could escort her to the Great Hall. Normally, you would follow Sansa everywhere, but you wanted to quickly get her room ready so it was more fit for a queen.
You raced to change the sheets on the bed, clean her bathroom, douse the fire and clean out the ashes before creating a fresh fire. The floors were swept and cleaned and windows opened to air out the room. The last thing you did was dash down to the kitchen to make a small bundle of cinnamon and rosemary and ran back to place it in the fireplace to burn, so her room would smell welcoming when she returned.
Then you went to your room to bathe and change into clean clothes before you raced to the Great Hall. The room was packed with representatives of the remaining Northern Houses, her brother, Bran Stark, as well as Sansa’s uncle, Edmure Tulley from Riverrun, and Robin Arryn of the Eyrie. You tucked yourself into a back corner where you could easily see the dais. The normal high table had been removed and replaced with a new Throne of the North, with dire wolves on each end on the back. 
Sansa entered the room and was trailed behind by her new Queen’s Guard. You hadn’t had a chance to admire the new armor this morning. The current five members wore black armor with a grey dire wolf head on the chest plate and grey capes trailing behind them. Sandor looked amazing in the new armor. He had even trimmed his beard to appear less scruffy for his new queen. And like the other guards, he kept his eyes ahead as he escorted Sansa to her new throne.
Once there, the maester placed the new crown upon her head as he announced the new Queen of the North. It was a simple band, molded to look like the Stark pattern with two dire wolves meeting at the front. 
The moment the crown touched her head, the North chanted: “The Queen of the North!”
You could not be more proud of the young woman you had helped raise. She looked every bit the queen that she had planned to be when she was a little girl and promised to that monster, Joffrey.
That night, all of Winterfell filled with loud voices, music, and the distant howling of wolves as everyone celebrated their new queen. You took a moment here and there to drink a glass of ale or wine, but mostly you tried to busy yourself so you wouldn’t focus on the fact that Sandor and Sansa were talking once again.
Yes, Sansa told you that Sandor really wanted you. But seeing them together made it so hard to believe those words. Especially when Sandor had yet to confirm them.
So that night you went to bed early to save your heart.
The next morning you were up early again and off to Sansa’s room, where you got a surprise from Arya in the hall.
“And where are you going?”
You furrowed your eyebrows. “To Queen’s Sansa’s room? I have to get her grace ready for the day.”
“Absolutely not! We know you’ve been lying to the staff about when your name day is, but you forgot we grew up with you. You have today off while the feast is prepared. Now head back to your room, a bath is being drawn and food is being brought up.”
Your jaw dropped in shock. “But Ser, I’m just a handmaid.”
Arya wouldn’t hear it. “You kept by my sister’s side, especially in King’s Landing when I couldn’t. You are family. Now go.”
Confused, but slowly growing happy at the sisters’ insistence of taking care of you, you went back to your room to enjoy a quiet morning. A brand new dress was awaiting you on the bed, no doubt a gift from Sansa and you couldn’t wait to change into it. You took your time, enjoying the warm bath, the good food, and then sitting in front of the fireplace in your room in a towel as you gently dried your hair, using your fingers to break up any tangles. 
After you finally put on the new dress, you left your room to walk the grounds. Fresh snow had fallen during the night and your footsteps were muted as you made your way to the Gods’ Wood. For once, Bran was not parked in front of the giant weirwood tree and so you took a seat at the stone by the trunk. 
You were quietly praying to the Old Gods when a deep voice interrupted your thoughts. 
“Forgive me, Little Wolf. I hope I’m not disturbing you.”
Your heart leaped in your chest at his voice. A voice you had not heard in weeks. Raising your head, a small smile graced your face as you answered. “No. I was merely speaking with the Old Gods. Thanking them for another year and for watching over me so I was able to return home safely.”
Sandor frowned at your words and you wondered what his relationship with religion was. He was from the South, but he never seemed the type to visit the Great Sept while in King’s Landing. 
“You believe in all that?” He slowly approached you.
“I don’t know,” you looked down at your hands as he stopped at your feet. “I did when I was a child, but much of that changed when I traveled South. But I know I cannot turn my back on them completely.”
“And why is that?” Sandor questioned.
“I believe they kept me alive. No one taught me to fight like Arya, no one taught me how to scheme my way to safety like Queen Sansa, and no one was by my side to fight for me. And yet, I not only survived King’s Landing but getting home as well.”
Sandor crouched until he was in your line of sight. Snow was drifting down from the deep red weirwood leaves, dotting hit hair and beard giving him a soft look to his tough face. 
“I believe you are not giving yourself enough credit, Little Wolf. I saw with my own eyes how you can take down a man when cornered.”
Your face grew warm at his praise. “Thank you. But I hope to never have to do that again.”
He cleared his throat and shifted on his feet. “You won’t. Not while I’m here.”
“You promise?”
A small smile graced his lips. “I promise, Little Wolf. I will never leave your side until you command it.”
You let out a shaky breath. “That’s unrealistic. You’re Sansa’s guard.”
“Aye, I am. But you are her handmaid and where she is, you are. I will protect both of you.”
“Thank you, Sandor. That means a great deal to me.”
“Does it?” Doubt crept into his eyes. “Most might be scared off by the idea of my following them around.”
“Aye. There was a time you frightened me as well. But that was before I truly got to know you.” You held a hand up to stop him from interrupting. “Now, that is not to say I don’t know your past. I am well aware of you who were. But any fool can clearly see you are no longer the man who left King’s Landing during the battle against Stannis.”
“I’ve tried. After my fight with Brienne, I was saved by a Septon. He taught me a few things. And before you comment - I can see your curiosity - he was once like me. So he would be the only religious fucker I’d listen to.”
You gave a small laugh. “Yes, that makes sense.”
His face grew serious. “There is something I’ve wanted to speak with you about. Something that has been on my mind for a while. But with the coronation, I haven’t had the time.”
“Well, you’re here now and I have the whole day to myself.”
“Aye, I know. Sansa told me where I could find you.” He ran a hand over his beard, trying to find his next words. “Little Wolf, I know who I am. I’ve done horrible things, things no one should be proud of. I’m no knight and I’m not a rich man. But I’m trying to change so I don’t- so I won’t be someone so frightening. You are a beautiful, quick-witted woman who can survive, even if she may not believe so. Any man would be lucky to court you.”
You took a shaky breath as he forced himself to meet your eyes.
“Would you...allow me to court you?”
The God’s Wood became still at his words and you tried to comprehend what he had asked you. Did Sandor really ask to court you?
“You...want to court me?”
Sandor tried to hide his face falling, mistaking your words for a no. “I know that may not seem something I would do, but I wanted to do right by you and our queen.”
You reached over and took his hand. “Sandor, I would love to court you.”
While his face did not betray any emotions - as was standard for this stoic man - but he reached up with his other hand and cupped your cheek. You placed your free hand over his as you felt yourself smile. Sansa was right! He really did want to court you.
He shifted on his feet and leaned in, the question in his eyes. And the answer was on your lips as you leaned in the remainder of the way to close the gap. It was the first sign of affection Sandor had ever given and he felt no place was more appropriate for a Northern girl than under a weirwood tree. So you would know how serious he was about you.
His large hand moved from your cheek to the back of your head to hold you closer to him and you moved both of your hands around his neck. Sandor pulled away after a few moments and you could feel how warm your face was, despite winter flowing all around. 
“We should get you back inside, Little Wolf. The Queen will have the feast ready soon.”
“You’re right, we shouldn’t keep Her Grace waiting.”
He climbed to his feet and held out a hand to help you up. Then after tucking your hand into the crook of his arm, he lead you out of the God’s Wood and back to Winterfell. You could tell he felt a bit awkward at the formality of courting so you squeezed his arm.
“Sandor, I know you are worried about doing things right for me - for us - with our courting. But perhaps instead of doing what others would expect, we do what truly would work for us?”
“What do you mean?”
“I know you are trying to change yourself, but we both know you are not a romantic man. There will be no vase of Winter Roses awaiting me in my chamber. So instead, let us move forward as us. You will show your affection your own way. And I will do the same.”
You looked up at him and could see the smirk forming. “Aye, that sounds like that path may suit us better.”
Inside the Great Hall, many of the lords and ladies who had traveled for Sansa’s coronation were there and the feast was already set up. All that was missing was you.
Sansa looked up from talking to Arya, a smile growing on her face. “There you are! We were afraid we would have to begin without you two.”
Arya snorted. “Looks like the old shit got some words to share.”
Sandor growled. “No one asked you.”
Sansa smirked. “Are we celebrating two things today?”
Your face grew warm. “Yes, Your Grace. Sandor has asked to court me.”
Arya rolled her eyes. “About damn time. You haven’t kept your eyes off her since we found her in the woods.”
“Shut your mouth, you little shit.”
“Whatever. Let’s get the drinks going.”
“Good idea, Arya.” Sansa turned back to you. “If you wish to announce your courtship tonight, just say the word. Otherwise, the kitchen has made your favorite tonight. Blessed Name Day, ____.”
“Thank you, Your Grace.”
Sansa stepped forward to give you a quick hug before she continued around the room to speak with the other lords. Sandor took this cue to lead you to a table where he poured you a glass of wine. Plates of food were brought over and Sandor took a seat across from you.
“So what will you do?”
A smile graced your face as you picked up your fork. “Tonight, I will just enjoy the food and wine. And perhaps, a few moments alone with you. Tomorrow, we can worry about expressing our news.”
“Moments alone?” He raised an eyebrow. 
“If you feel up for it later.”
“Anything for you, Little Wolf.”
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wh6res · 4 years ago
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taeil — part of the my bloody valentine collection.
prompt. soulmates are connected by a red string.
synopsis. taeil thinks the whole system is bullshit. he needs to take matters into his own hands.
warnings. tread cautiously. swearing, mentions of death, blood, mentions of kidnapping, violence, turning a 'lil dubcon near the end, severe stockholm syndrome, manipulation 
disclaimer. a friendly reminder that i do not, under any circumstance, condone or support any acts like this. this is not love and this is not how a normal relationship should be like. the things i write are all fiction and should be treated as such and if you don’t like it, please do not read it and waste your time hating on it. the 9 members of nct 127 do not act like this in real life and shouldn’t act like this in real life. 
thank you to. sexeh sam @yukwonghei, cutie charlie @dundun-baby, and baby rina @greenish-taro for beta-reading!
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since he was a kid, he’s fantasized about meeting his soulmate. creating scenario after scenario of how he’d meet ‘the one’ as he had cheesily addressed and had absolutely freaked when he finally saw the red string tied around his right wrist on his 20th birthday—courtesy of the soulmate rules of the universe, where one will finally be able to see the string tied around their body once they’ve come of age. 
for years before he met that other soul who’s destined to be with him, taeil would stare at the red thread lying across the floor, disappearing under the gap of his door and out to the world unknown. he’d be so distracted, so aloof and in his own world as he anticipates the long-awaited day until his professor calls him out—“moon! do yourself a favor and stop daydreaming!”
until his friends snap him out of it—“thinking of them again? really?”
until his parents shake him out of his thoughts—“don’t worry, i bet they’ll love you!”
sometimes he just loved staring at the string, it was something so measly as a bunch of threads intricately woven together yet it held such a symbol in today’s world. call him lovesick or stupid but was it really wrong to feel excited? taeil’s even betting the person on the other side of this string is just as excited as he was, if not more. 
in the man’s eyes, the strings are a symbol of something more than love—it symbolized the person the universe has created especially for him and no one else. 
taeil can’t even imagine a world without these strings. how difficult it would be, to love and invest in someone who will only end up breaking your heart? no, the strings also meant reassurance. 
assurance that he won’t get hurt. 
an assurance of faithfulness. 
he had only been a wide-eyed fresh grad looking for some place to intern when it happened. like a scene right out of a cheesy romance movie—he felt the persistent tugs of the string before finally meeting his soulmate. well, using the word meet to describe the whole ordeal is a huge stretch because it was more of a holy shit, is that my soulmate? rather than a hi, i'm your soulmate, taeil!
he merely saw the back of her poised figure but taeil’s heart felt like it wanted to explode, his emotions a mess and feeling everything to the extremes. nervous. scared. anxiety. happiness. excitement—it was all coming at him like bullets. 
as taeil stared at her back, walking away, johnny kept shoving him forward, encouraging him to finally approach the person he’s been waiting for ever since that soulmate string appeared around his pinky. 
but he couldn’t—not because he was so anxious he’d accidentally vomit the 4-cheese whopper he had for lunch but due to the line of people trailing behind his soulmate like a bunch of baby ducks to their mom. the thought of coming up to his soulmate and introducing himself in front of all those people?
romantic, maybe, but taeil doesn’t have the stomach to do that. 
he remembers how much johnny had wolf whistled, unbelieving of the fact his friend managed to snag the possible heir to the company they’re attending an interview in as his soulmate. 
“lucky little asshole,” johnny muttered. 
taeil had been experiencing the post-effects of seeing his soulmate that he just weakly punched johnny’s arm for the heck of it. he probably didn’t even hear the name his younger friend had called him. taeil’s mind is clouding over, no thoughts in his head but the white polo shirt she wore, sleeves neatly rolled up, and the black pencil skirt hugging her legs and making her ass look so plump. 
focus. he needs to focus on the interview right now or else he won’t even have the chance to work here and officially meet her. everything the interviewer asked passed through his head like paper planes in a classroom, shamelessly asking the woman sitting before him to repeat the question, too busy reveling about how their soulmate story would be the cliché office-love. not that taeil minds, he’d love going to work together—
two weeks later, johnny receives an email of acceptance. taeil doesn’t.
the man nearly threw his laptop away out of sheer disbelief and anger. okay, sure, maybe he could’ve done better in the interview but he graduated with latin honors in college! and from a prestigious college at that. he shouldn’t even be applying as a mere intern with the skill set he had yet he went with it because he’d always dreamed of working there. 
and now knowing his soulmate is possibly someone who holds a high position in the company? everything just kept getting better and better for moon taeil. 
except for that fucking email—pft, or lack thereof. how can they not accept him when he’s more capable than johnny, anyway? for fuck’s sake! taeil doesn’t even ask that guy for rent and he’s so thick-skinned that he stayed up to this day and freeloaded off taeil’s food and shelter. 
the absolute unfairness of the situation makes taeil’s blood reach a fever point. he’s completely lossed it, leading him to spit “get the fuck out!” to the other male occupant in the apartment with eyes glaring and lips pulled into a nasty sneer. 
johnny’s never seen taeil this upset before and decided that he’d be better off abiding by the older man’s wishes instead of contradicting it. 
no. no. no. this can’t be happening. if taeil doesn’t work there, with her, all his sweet fantasies won’t come true and god forbid she ends up falling for another person in the company. 
anyone would be naturally drawn to taeil’s soulmate. in his eyes, she’s a goddess in the flesh. taeil doesn’t even need to see her face, from the few seconds he saw a glimpse of her, her presence and allure in itself is already eye-catching. the way her low ponytail swished from side to side as she walked, her back straight and head held high. 
taeil needs to see her again. maybe if she finds out he’s her soulmate she’ll put a good word in and he’ll get hired. 
yeah. yeah, that’s a good plan. 
“please get out of my office or i’ll call security.”
or not.
“no, wait. but i just said i’m your soulmate!” to further prove his point, he even raises up his pinky and sure enough the other end of the string is tied around hers. the incessant pull is there and if not for her sharp cold eyes anchoring him to the ground, taeil would’ve long been soaring high in cloud nine. 
“and i said i don’t care,” she snaps just as her fingers sneakily pressed a button in her phone. “i have a fiancé. the whole soulmate bullshit doesn’t apply to rich people. so for the fucking last time, get out of my office.”
“but—”
the double doors of the vice president’s office bounces off the walls when two burly guards barge in. dressed in a white long sleeves and those heavy tinted shades of glasses that taeil hates. the two men waste no time in hooking their arms underneath the smaller, frail man as he thrashes against their arms. 
“how can you not care about your soulmate?!” taeil can feel the beginning licks of the flames eating up his whole world as everything comes crashing down before his very eyes. “i’ve been—i’ve been waiting my whole life for you and this is how you treat me?!” 
he doesn’t know what hurts more, the scratch in his throat as he screamed with all his might or the stoic look written on her face as the guards haul him away. 
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when johnny heard the news he’d never felt so sorry for his friend. rumors that initially circulated only between the executive board members had spread and trickled down to the common folk on the lower levels. johnny making it a mission to find out, had extracted himself from his usual cheery and extroverted self to blend in with the background. taeil has yet to talk to him after he got kicked out, so asking his friend—or ex-friend?—about what happened is out of the question. 
but like any other breed of rumor, the tale of their vice president’s soulmate barging in her office is ever changing through each mouth that tells the story. johnny doesn't know what to believe in. he’s been trying to put off a meeting with the older man ever since he started crashing in taeyong’s apartment instead. not that taeil himself even tried reaching out to johnny, anyway. 
so why should he, when he doesn’t even know what he did wrong?
but there’s a nagging voice at the back of johnny’s head. his conscience isn’t too loud but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s there and it doesn’t need excessive volumes to be heard. all it takes is a second of distraction from the paperwork he does, attention straying from the task at hand, and his body will automatically be wracked with guilt. 
knowing how much taeil had waited for his soulmate to come to his life, knowing how taeil can readily give everything up for his soulmate without even meeting them yet… and now knowing taeil just got the worst ever rejection in his entire life?
johnny can’t possibly imagine the pain he’s going through. is he really going to choose now out of all times to be petty because taeil kicked him out when he didn’t even bother asking johnny for anything in return during his stay in the apartment?
so when taeil finally contacted him, the sketchyness of what he had asked for flew right over johnny’s head. rational thoughts flying out the window because taeil needs him, he should his friend after everything taeil did for him—
“hey, uhm… i need insider’s information, can you do that for me?”
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you shook your head at the long story johnny told you. tuffs of your hair have escaped the intricate pigtails taeil has put your hair up in earlier before he left for work. he’s always hated having your hair messy, but at the moment you couldn’t find yourself to care. 
“i wouldn’t put it past taeil’s original soulmate…” you think aloud, mouth speaking before you can stop yourself as you stare disdainfully at the dulled string wrapped around your pinky—it lost its divine red glow after your captor had cut it off on the same day he whisked you away.
ironic, how easy it was to destroy something so important.
you backtracked, realizing the gravity of what you said before looking up at your captor’s friend. johnny doesn’t look all too impressed and he sighs at the pleading look in your eyes. please, don’t tell him.
“i guess you’re somewhat right…” he gives in, coursing his fingers through his hair. “taeil had been… very passionate on finding his soulmate. but i mean, come on, why’d you even marry someone who isn’t your soulmate? i don’t blame taeil for doing what he did to them.”
johnny ignores the way your breath hitches and your body halts all movement. “what—what did he do?”
“paid them a ‘lil visit after gathering enough resources from someone on the inside,” his face stoic, voice monotone. johnny doesn’t like talking about this one. “he studied their schedules, where they live, where they work, how they get to work, what time they sleep, what time they wake. then just one day…” 
he drags a finger across his neck.
“oh.” 
pathetically, it was all you can say. why did you even bother to ask, anyway? if taeil had been willing to exert force just to keep you in line, then he has the stomach for whatever gruesome deaths he subjected his soulmate and her fiancé to.
you nibble on your lip as you stare at the knot of thread lying on the floor. you don’t see the need to wear the collar wrapped around your neck when that knot is good enough a reminder that you’re now bound to taeil. that he’s fucked around with your destiny and decided he’ll have you out of all people. 
its hard to believe taeil once almost worshipped the soulmate bonds, not when all he’s ever done is look at it like it's the bane of his existence and calling it a curse to humanity.
“do you know that you’re—”
“that i’m the 5th? yeah, i know. i saw all the knots on his string.” you defeatedly say, a vivid image of the knots spaced across his string like tophies. “taeil doesn’t like me staring at them, though.”
and you yourself didn’t like staring at them. you never thought something so small and insignificant can mean something so sinister. the knots on his string acting like a body counter. will he get sick of you one day and you’ll just be another knot on his string?
“you’re nothing like his soulmate—i’m not insulting you or anything, i’m just saying the truth. the past girls all had at least something in common with her but you… nothing. not even your hair shines like hers, and that’s even after taeil has taken good care of you.”
this doesn’t soothe you in any sense and before you can open your mouth to retort, the familiar beeping of the code getting punched into the keypad cuts you off. 
taeil stood in the entrance as he shrugged off his coat, his polo crinkled at some areas and pieces of his hair had escaped that slicked back hairstyle. 
“you’re home early…”
your blood runs cold when he doesn’t even offer you a glance, skipping you out and immediately addressing johnny. “i thought i told you to go home already after delivering the food.”
you admire the way johnny’s eyes roll. must be nice not to be so fucking terrified of the man. “yeah, but your current sweetheart here was lonely and practically begged me to stay.”
the sting of betrayal never grows familiar. 
“i never said anything—”
“you did, have you forgotten already?” you hate the show of lust clouding in johnny’s eyes as he stares you down. this can’t be happening right now. “have you forgotten how you even came unto me? whined like a bitch about how taeil doesn’t even fuck you hard enough and you had to fake orgasms all the time?”
“that’s not true!” your frustration manifests as tears. they sting your eyes as you look at taeil. “i never said anything—”
but you pale when you realize they’re not even listening to you, the two guys fist bumping in the foyer and exchanging a few words like “thanks for telling me,” and “no problem, bro,” were heard before taeil is heatedly storming up to you. 
you feel numb as you look over taeil’s shoulder at the little smirk johnny shoots at you. have fun, he mouths mockingly and then he’s out the door, extracting himself from the mess he created. 
when taeil wordlessly drags you across the hallway, you thought he’ll make a right turn and into the bedroom but imagine your surprise when he pulls you instead towards the bathroom. he wastes no time throwing you against the cold hard tiles as he tells you only one thing. 
“strip.”
“taeil…”
“you don’t want to be replaced.” it doesn’t take a genius to know taeil had hit the nail on the head. all your movements come to a halt, looking up at him with an unreadable look in your face. “that’s your fear, isn’t it? that if you die, if i kill you, i can just look for another girl and you’d be forgotten at the snap of a finger. i’m right, aren’t i?”
you gulp, his words stinging even if he didn’t mean for it to sting. or maybe he did. taeil takes a step closer to you, studying your appearance as he brings a hand up to caress your tear-stained face. 
spots in your clothes are wet due to the splashes of water on the tiles, and the clips in your hair that once looked neat and perfect are now hanging in disarray, falling off in some places. 
“i’m sorry,” you sob. “i’m sorry, john—johnny’s lying. you—you have to—to believe me. please don’t replace me… i’ll be good, i promise…”
truly, there’s no better motivator than fear. and there’s no better way to mess with someone’s head than using their weakness against them. 
“you say you’ll be good but i tell you to strip and you couldn’t even do that?” 
taeil could never imagine replacing you. he finds it stupid, whatever that brought in this fear of yours, but it doesn’t mean he won’t be extracting every little bit he can get out of this.
he can only stare in awe when you start wiggling your way out of your pretty pink clothes, eyes drinking every bit of your skin slowly being exposed to him as he reaches behind you to open the running water, slowly filling the bathtub.
“get in,” he instructs and you waste no time. 
as he sheds his own clothes, he can practically feel the want radiating off you. he knew johnny’s lying, but he humored his friend still. there’s no way you can fake the noises you always make. plus, taeil has seen one too many times the cum dribbling out of your cunt after he’s fucked you into oblivion. he scoffs. harder? then he’ll be breaking you in half already. 
taeil swats your hand away as it reaches for his cock and he hopes you don’t notice it twitching before you when you let out a cute whine. 
“you want it?”
you nod urgently, salavitating at the thought. taeil was more of a giver to his partners, it’s rare for him to take his pleasure first but you’re far from complaining. 
“oh, i don’t know…” he pouts, fisting himself in front of you before giving it a few testing pumps. he swallows the hiss threatening to spill from his lips, chuckling instead at the intense look in your eyes as it follows his hand movements. 
you were by far the most compliant girl he’s ever had, someone who’d rather stay than escape. his methods of forcing someone into submission worked extremely well with you. so really, how can he let go of his glorified little pet?
“you’re not lying to me, aren’t you? i got hurt, you know, with what johnny said… i guess i was doing something wrong.”
“no!” your reply is immediate. “no, that’s not true—”
hands wrap around your throat like a vice. “how about you prove it to me, love? tell me everything i want to hear.”
now, this is easy. you’ve practically memorized everything you need to tell him to boost his ego. it doesn’t even take much of an effort. 
“i love your cock so much that my body hurts. it hits all the right places inside of me and i will never even dream of wanting another man because they won’t be able to fuck me like you do.”
you feel giddy when he smiles that satisfied smile, your toes curling in anticipation as he leans in to give his obedient darling a kiss—
until he shoves your face down the water. 
it doesn’t take much effort to wrestle your limbs down and insert himself into you, groaning at the feeling of your lush and moist walls sucking him in. you’re always so damn wet when he fucks you, oh how much he loves it. loves how tighter your cunt wraps around him as you squirm and fight him to get to the surface of the half-filled tub.
it was only after a few deep thrusts did he relent and pull you up, the few hair clips in your hair floating in the water around as you gasp greedy amounts of air. one look at taeil’s face pulled in ecstasy is enough for you to know it was well worth it.
maybe being rejected by his soulmate was a blessing in disguise. maybe the disobedience of every girl he took before you had been deliberately well-planned. or else he’d never would’ve met you. 
taeil was right. all the soulmate and soulmark shit is utterly useless and stupid. because you are by no means his soulmate, but fuck he’ll never let you go.
not when your destiny is to lay there underneath him, taking whatever it is that he gave you like a good little whore. 
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kingofkingdom-archive · 4 years ago
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Recovery [Ezra (Prospect) x Fem!Reader]
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A/N: Hello all! This is my first Pedro Pascal work and the first to be posted here to this blog. If anyone has any requests, don’t hesitate to send them my way! As always, please read the tags/warnings, you are responsible for the media you choose to consume. Also posted to AO3 under the same username (kingofkingdom). I did not use “y/n” or anything similar in this story.
Rating: Explicit
Summary: You were taken from your younger sister, Cee, ten years ago. When you answered a distress call from the Green, you didn’t expect to be reunited with her, and you certainly didn’t expect to meet a man like Ezra. 
Warnings: mention of past violence/death, discussion of medical procedure, discussion of disability (amputation/loss of limb), family dynamics, abstract discussion of philosophy, small SW universe cameo :)
Tags: considerable amounts of fluff, size kink, daddy kink, hint of dd/lg, copious use of various pet names, p-in-v sex, some breast play/worship, some dom!ezra & sub!reader
Word count: 9552
You hadn't seen Cee since your mother died. 
Her father had taken her and left you in the care of your aunt, a woman you didn't know, a woman who jumped at the chance to send you off to boarding school on the Ephrate the moment you were old enough. Most of your memories consisted of your host family there, with a younger "sister" who reminded you all too much of the one you had lost. In your mind, Cee was still a toddler, all wispy blonde hair and big blue eyes.
Cee's father had never liked you. You were the evidence of his wife's life before him, and you looked too much like your own deceased father for him to have any affection toward you. It didn't surprise you that he left you behind after your mother died, but at ten that didn't make it hurt any less. 
Since then, ten years had passed. Now, your aunt was gone, and your studies on the Ephrate completed. You'd taken to a rather nomadic lifestyle, catching rides from planet to station to planet and picking up odd jobs here and there. It wasn't much, but you'd become a strong woman in your time on your own, and thoughts of your half-sister plagued you only some nights now.
Jobs you took ranged from helping the lone-wolf prospector on an excavation to ship repairs at major stations across the system. In one of your darker moments, you'd even carried out a hit against some low-level merc who'd pissed off the wrong people. Those people paid well, enough to fill your stomach for a few days and cover a ride far away from that moon. The right circles knew you could hold your own, and that's what mattered.
This particular station was on the outskirts of the system, a rough-and-tumble place frequented only by prospectors and the people that paid them. You'd taken a shift at the bar here a few weeks ago, and knew the locals pretty well. In a spot like this, people could often get more information at your humble establishment than they could from the officials. You were lying low, and you itched to get moving again, like the nomad you were.
Hence why you kept the radio channels on all the time during your shifts, quiet and unobtrusive where you stood at the bar.
You were thankful, looking back, that it had been a quiet afternoon, and that you'd been so vigilant in keeping track of job openings.
"This is Kilo-Romeo 12, calling from Green sector 608. In need of assistance pronto, rapid extraction A.S.A.P."
The voice is faint, but frantic - a masculine growl laced with an edge of panic. Your radio isn't the best, and you don't recognize the prospector's callsign, but you know he must be in deep shit. A call like this from the Green is a death sentence if someone doesn't act quickly.
As with most of your decisions, you act entirely on impulse. As you hit the button to close up the bar's doors, the radio is already in your hands.
"This is Juno B-390, responding to Kilo-Romeo 12. Do you copy?"
You're down the hall by now, rushing to your quarters to collect your meager belongings. Everything fits in a single pack, and you're just pulling your helmet onto your head when the radio crackles to life again.
"I copy, Juno B-390," the relief is evident in his voice, even through the static. "We need extraction and medical care."
Well, that wasn't in the initial signal. "We? How many are with you? And what kind of medical care are we talkin' here?"
"Just me and one other. Deep trauma to the abdomen, I'm afraid."
You swear under your breath. Nothing you can't handle, but this guy's timer's really running out. You grab the necessary supplies and dash to your small pod racer, which is just big enough with its three seats.
"Hang on, Kilo-Romeo. I'll be there as soon as I'm able. You'll need to direct me to your exact location, is that clear?"
There's a moment of silence before his voice echoes through your racer one last time.
"Clear."
-
You descend upon the Green as fast as the forces of physics and gravity allow you to. Sector 608, as it says on your map, is a stretch of deep woods and rolling terrain, nearly unexplored save for the last rush. You slow up as you approach, and call out to the prospector over the radio once again.
"Kilo-Romeo 12, this is Juno B-390. I am approaching your location. Do you copy?"
It's quiet. Much too quiet. You slow the racer even more, as your heart begins to race. Just as you begin to worry that you're too late, the radio awakens.
It's not the man, however, whose voice you hear.
"This is Ez-- I mean, this is Kilo-Romeo's... uh... companion. He's gotten worse."
It's a girl. A young teen, from the sound of it. Your heart clenches, thinking of how scared she must be out there.
"Okay, hey there. It's gonna be okay. Can you tell me what landmarks you see? Help me find you."
"Um, yeah. We're in a clearing, there's another ship right nearby. It's not operational, which is wh-- uh, yeah. Clearing, big ship. Also sort of a gulley nearby."
You're about to respond when she speaks again.
"Please, hurry."
"I will, kid. Just keep him alive."
It takes you longer than you would've liked to find this clearing, but once you do you see a scene that brings more questions than answers. Dead bodies litter the field and a half-blown excavation site sits in ruins. Discretion's always been a virtue of yours, though, so you file the information away in your brain and swiftly land your craft. As soon as you exit, you hear the girl's voice not too far away.
"Here! We're over here!"
You grab the field kit and run over to where she stands over a slumped figure. The man you'd spoken to is now unconscious, and not only does he have a nasty looking wound in his chest, he's missing an arm. You look up at the girl. Her brows are furrowed, eyes like steel. You like her already.
"Go to the racer and grab the stretcher that's behind the passenger seat. We'll have to move him onto that and carry him over."
She nods and runs off. Immediately, you turn to the man and take stock of his injuries. The arm has been gone for at least a little while, so that's not of immediate concern. You set to treating the chest wound, making sure to purge it and his suit of dust. Nasty stuff, that which floats around this planet. His filter is as good as gone, so you quickly connect your own.
You drain the wound with the juice the locals here produce, which is generally in stock in the station's field kits. It smells rank, but it works, and the man below you groans. Good, he's still vocal, at least. It doesn't sound like a lung's been punctured. You set up a highly temporary pocket over his wound and torn suit through which you can patch the injury. You take some foaming antiseptic and apply it to the wound before adhering a sticky bio-bandage over the top of it. 
It'll do for now. He'll need further treatment at the station, but this should keep him alive, at least. 
The girl returns with the stretcher then, and places it next to the man. You glance up at her, and see momentarily a young version of yourself. Eager to help. Eager to make things right. 
You shake your head, collecting your thoughts. "Okay, so I'm going to tilt his body towards me, and you slide the stretcher as far as you can under him. Then we'll let him down on top of it and secure him for travel. Can you do that?"
She nods, and you give her a small smile. You hook one arm around the man's waist, the other supporting his neck and shoulder. 
"On three, okay? One... two... three!"
Quickly, you roll him up onto his remaining arm as she slides the stretcher under him. As gently as possible, you let him back down, and just like that he's mostly on the stretcher. You set to arranging him properly and tying straps down. 
The girl fidgets, and you look up to her.
"Do you know how to stow the back seat in a racer like that?" you ask, and she nods.
"Good, go do it."
She runs off, and is back by the time you've gotten the man secured to the stretcher.
"You take the handles at his feet and I'll take his head. We have to be careful not to tilt him too much, to keep the weight on the stretcher even. Did he suffer any head trauma?"
The girl shakes her head. "No, I don't think so."
You probably should have asked that before moving him onto the stretcher, but then again no one's ever known you for your excellence in trauma care. Your knowledge of first aid comes only from what you've picked up in the field, so sometimes the order of operations gets a bit jumbled. 
Whatever. He'll be okay. You can't let yourself think otherwise.
The girl stoops to grab hold of the handles at his feet. You do the same at his head, and again you count backwards from three.
"Up!"
Together you stand, and twin groans echo from both of you. The girl huffs, clearly struggling a bit under the weight.
"Okay, let's go. Slowly, remember."
You walk backwards, feet taking cautious steps so as to keep the same pace as the young girl. Her face is screwed up in focus and concentration, hands in a vice grip on the handles. 
"You're doing good, kid. Just a bit further."
Before you know it, you've reached the ship. Carefully, you set the stretcher in the racer, and then the two of you slide it in. There's just barely enough room for it. You quickly secure it, and then close the hatch.
The girl is looking at you, eyes wide and chest heaving. You reach out a gloved hand and set it on her shoulder, giving a firm squeeze. 
"He'll be okay. I promise. Now go get in the passenger seat and I'll get us back up to the station."
She nods, and seems to relax a bit at that. You can't help but wonder what she's been through, out here in this rough, unforgiving environment. "Thank you."
You smile, and sincerely hope that this young girl finds a way to leave this life of prospecting behind. You don't know how she got here, but it's no place for someone so young. You know that all too well.
"Let's go, kid."
-
The trip was pretty quiet save for a single groan from the man in back. The girl glanced back to him when she heard that, and then looked at you, concerned.
"It's okay. He'll be in and out of consciousness until we get to the station. I'll pull up to the emergency med-bay so the doctors can start treating him properly right away."
You look over to her, and she nods.
"Does he have anyone they can contact? Any family?" you ask. "The doctors will need to know."
She shakes her head. "I'm not sure. I don't think so."
You sigh. "Okay. Well, we'll deal with that when we get there."
It's not long after that you arrive at the med-bay. It's a whirlwind of nurses and questions and forms, most of which you have to leave blank, since you don't know the guy and the girl seems not to know much more. She does, however, give you a name.
"His name's Ezra," she offers, when she sees you pause at the line on the top of the screen.
You look over at her. "Ezra? Spelled E-Z-R-A?"
She nods. "Never told me a last name though."
"That's alright. A first name's enough."
She sits next to you and helps where she can as you fill out the form. Once you're done, you go up to hand the tablet back to the receptionist. You then sit back down next to her, crossing your arms over your flight suit. The girl's fiddling with her fingers, bag tucked between her feet.
"Do you think we'll be able to see him when they're done?" she asks, clearly trying not to sound as worried as she is.
You shrug. "Probably. It might be a while, though. Do you want something to eat while we wait?"
She nods, and when you look over at her, she's smiling. 
As it turns out, it does take a pretty long time for them to complete the operation. It feels like hours that you two are sitting there. You watch the people come and go from the waiting room while the girl writes in some notebook, headphones secure over her ears, absently eating a chocolate bar.
She can't be more than 13 or 14. You think back to when you were that age - in the middle of your time at the Ephrate, moody and angsty like all young teens. It makes you think of Cee. She'd be about that age by now. You look over to the girl sitting next to you, wondering what ever became of your sister. Maybe she's at the Ephrate by now, or perhaps her father has taken her to some peaceful planet with beaches and a nice home, a few pets running around. 
Hopefully a better life than the one you've led. Somewhere far from thrower blasts and gemstones.
This girl seems nice enough, and you're sure she's seen her fair share of shit. It's clear this guy's not only not her father, but that they haven't known each other long at all. You can't help but wonder how they ended up traveling together. 
Images of the clearing littered with bodies flashes in your mind. Something went down there, and it clearly got ugly fast. It's amazing that the girl emerged relatively unscathed. You've seen a fair share of shootouts and fights, and never did you escape completely uninjured. It takes cleverness and a strong sense of self-preservation, the latter of which you don't often have.
You're ruminating on the mystery sitting next to you when the doors to the operating rooms swing open. A nurse steps out and looks at both of you. You stand, and she follows suit.
"He's awake, and asking for you," the nurse says. You nudge the girl slightly with your elbow.
"Go on, go see hi--"
The nurse cuts in. "He's asking for both of you."
Oh. You're surprised. He doesn't even know you, so there's no reason he should be asking to see you. Despite your confusion, you follow behind the girl as she follows the nurse to his room.
The hallways are sterile and white, cleaner than anything you've seen in months. The doorway is the last on the right, and inside is a single bed, with a small window looking out to the stars.
The young girl enters first as the nurse stands to the side, and you hover in the doorway to watch, still not quite feeling entirely welcome. You can just see the man's - Ezra's - hair behind the girl, with an unusual shock of blonde in otherwise dark brown curls.
"I was wondering where you went, birdie. One minute I was on the ground and next thing I know I'm sitting here like a babe in a bassinet, right as rain," he says, voice melodic with an accent you can't quite place.
"Do you feel better, Ezra?" the girl asks, voice wavering just slightly.
"I do. Are you faring alright yourself?"
She nods, and crosses her arms. Silence fills the room for a moment, then Ezra speaks again.
"Who was so kind as to bring us here, birdie?" he asks. The girl turns to you and steps aside so Ezra can see you.
"She did," she replies, a soft look on her face.
You step forward and look at Ezra properly for the first time. You hadn't really paid much attention to his facial features back on the Green, so concerned as you were with getting him out of there.
His dark brown eyes are kind, and his lips tease at a smile. He's got stubble growing on his chin and a mustache on his lip. There's a thin white line in the shape of a crescent underneath his left eye, the silvery remnant of a deep cut sustained long ago. He's older than you, maybe 40 or so. For some reason, you feel butterflies erupt in your stomach, but you're quick to snuff those out best you can. Mirroring the girl, you cross your arms, and flip your braid over your shoulder.
"Yeah, that would be me," you say, as nonchalantly as you can manage.
"I recognize that voice from the radio," he notes, looking at you intently. "I can't hardly give you enough thanks for getting the two of us out of that... sticky situation. You really are somethin' else, sugar."
You shrug, unused to such praise, such immediate kindness. You feel your face heat up with a blush, and you clear your throat.
"Well, it sure sounded like you were in need of some help. I'm happy to see you're doing better."
Your voice is softer than you intend. Spending even three minutes with this guy seems to have thrown you off balance. You haven't met anyone that talks like him since you were in school, and it's like a breath of fresh air.
His face turns serious at your words. Ezra's gaze is as intense as it is gentle, burning into your own.
"Oh, much better," he assures you, giving you a look you can't quite decipher. A smile quickly returns to his features. "It's a shame they couldn't get my arm to grow back."
You laugh a little at that, happy to see that he's in good spirits. The nurse steps forward then, tablet in hand. The three of you turn to her.
"Ezra will likely be discharged tomorrow morning, given how much progress he's made just today. He will need somewhere to rest, however, for the next week or so. We can help to make boarding arrangeme--"
"No," you interrupt, surprising even yourself. "No, he can stay with me. I have quarters in the 4th wing." You turn to the girl. "You can stay with me too, if you'd like." You don't know what's come over yourself, but you find yourself drawn to this unlikely pair.
The girl nods once, just as Ezra speaks up. "You're too kind, sugar. Your hospitality and generosity are appreciated beyond measure. Do let us know if there's any way at all we can show our gratitude."
You shake your head immediately, waving a hand as if to wave away the notion.
"No need for that. Consider it a celebratory gift for parting with the Green."
Everyone laughs at that - even the nurse, who hides her grin behind her tablet.
-
The next morning, you and the girl - whose name you still don't know, and who still does not know yours - visit the med-bay first thing after breakfast. Your quarters are small, enough to fit two comfortably and three at most. The girl has decided to take the sofa, since Ezra will need to rest, and a bed is most ideal for that. It seems you both tend to rise early, so you gave her some oatmeal and a cup of coffee. She took both without hesitation, and it warmed your heart to see her eat after however long she and Ezra had been out there.
When you two arrive, Ezra is waiting in his room, dressed in clean loungewear with a bag on his lap. He is seated in a wheelchair. You and the girl greet him, happy to see that he is rested and ready to leave.
"I told the kind folks that I am more than able to walk unaided," he comments when you begin to push the chair from behind. "They insisted, however, and I am not one to ignore the advice and orders of my physicians."
You see the girl try to hide a smile. It seems as though he's grown on her, and she struggles to admit that to herself. Before you can think better of it, you give Ezra a pat on the right shoulder, a small attempt at reassurance.
"You'll be walking in no time, I'm sure," you reply.
You feel his left hand cover your own, and you nearly stumble as you push him along through the hallway. His palm is rough and callused, a signature trait of most prospectors. It's large, too, covering your own entirely. Its warmth soaks through the back of your hand and into your stomach.
"With kindness as bright as yours to guide me, that will certainly be the case."
You don't know what to say to that, so you give his shoulder a squeeze and retract your hand.
The 4th wing is not too far from the med-bay; the station itself is smaller than most, so the distance is blessedly short. Ezra does most of the talking while the three of you walk.
"It would suit me just perfectly to never see that god-forsaken moon again so long as I live," he comments just as you reach the door to your quarters. You scan your ID card and the panel slides open, revealing a small but comfortable dwelling. "Forget the gems, forget the money. Prospecting is surely the most foolish endeavor of them all."
"The lust for wealth is stronger than the fear of death," you reply, almost without thinking.
Ezra looks up at you, smiling, a curious look on his face. "Asmolea. Ruminations, chapter seven. Color me impressed, sugar."
You look back, equally surprised. "You recognize that quote?"
"Why, yes, in fact, I do," he responds, and you notice the girl watching the two of you out of the corner of your eye. "I was an admirer of the great thinkers, long ago. When I was younger, and more -- well, more curious about such things, I suppose."
You wheel him into the small sitting area, arranged around a holo-screen. The walls are bare, lack of personality belying a short-lived residence here. You engage the wheelchair's brakes and take a seat yourself, across from him on an armchair. The girl sits on the sofa, where she slept last night.
"Philosophy is the sustenance of the mind," he continues, kicking his feet up to rest on the coffee table. He winces slightly at the motion, but keeps speaking nevertheless. "Without it, we decay. We risk succumbing to trivial errors of man. It is the sharpening stone to the blade of our intellect."
"What about literature?" the girl asks, her eyes firey and brow set. "I think that's much more valuable than what some ancient guy thought about a world we don't even know anymore."
You smile, pleased at this contribution. "I think great literature can convey philosophical ideas in the form of a modern narrative. You just have to keep an eye out for it, and understand its relevance to the story."
Ezra nods along. "I agree. Where did you read Asmolea, sugar?"
"At the Ephrate," you reply, and you see the girl perk up. You smile at her, hoping the two of you will have a chance to discuss that later. She seems entirely intrigued by you now. "I studied there for seven years, until I was eighteen."
"Why did you leave?" the girl asks.
You sigh, and bring your foot up to rest on the chair, so your thigh is pressed against your front. "Life there didn't suit me. I'm much happier on my own, not surrounded by stuffy academics and pretentious businessmen. The only ones I could stand there were the monks."
Ezra laughs at that. "The Neo-Carthusians?"
You nod, grinning. "Yeah. Considered joining, for about a month or so. I admire their lives of solitude and contemplation, but I couldn't imagine staying in one place for so long."
The conversation flows between the three of you so naturally you hardly notice the time flying by. They ask questions about you, and you return the favor by inquiring about their lives. The girl is quiet when it comes to her past, but you find out her father died on the Green. Both she and Ezra are hesitant to talk about it, which tells you all that you need to know.
Night falls quickly, or at least night according to standard time - on the station, there is no night or day, just a constant darkness visible out the windows interrupted by pinpricks of light. Everyone follows the standard clock, which runs according to time on the Ephrate. 
You show Ezra to his room after the three of you have eaten dinner. It's a small space, just enough for a bed and a dresser. Carefully, he stands from the wheelchair, tosses his bag on the bed, and turns to look at you.
He's much taller than you are. The butterflies return as you look up at him, and a warm feeling radiates through the area below your stomach.
"Thank you again for the hospitality, sugar," he murmurs, voice low and deep. He moves the wheelchair out from between you, so there's nothing but air separating the two of you. "As I said, don't hesitate to ask if there is anything I can do to repay you. Anything at all."
You nod, at a loss for words. His hand comes up and gently brushes a loose strand of hair away from your face and tucks it behind your ear. You positively melt. This man is going to be the death of you.
"I'm just glad to see you safe, Ezra," you reply, and your eyes flutter at the way his fingers linger over the apple of your cheek. His lips look so soft, his eyes full of promises he intends to keep. You can feel yourself falling, as if in a dream.
You blink and lean back, away from him. This is a bad idea. For what reason, you can't say, but you dart to your room as soon as you begin to doubt yourself.
You shut the door and lean against it. There's no way, your mind whispers to you. He feels indebted. That's the only reason. You're too young, he just sees you as a kid.
In your haste, you didn't see the look in his eyes as you left so suddenly, or the way he stared at the door long after you shut it.
-
In the night, you dream of him. Dark eyes above you, heavenly, filthy moans filling the air around you, something thick and perfect filling the empty space inside you. His musical voice murmurs sweet words in your ear, and you hear the sound of your passion just as much as you feel it. Your hands grip his hair as he thrusts, your body trembling underneath him.
Your peak startles you awake, and you find your bedsheets soaked with the evidence of your fantasy.
Your bedside clock tells you it is the early hours of the morning. With a sigh, you toss back the blankets and emerge from your room quietly. 
After a quick shower in the refresher, you step out and wrap a towel around yourself. You stare into the mirror, thinking about him.
You've never felt such an instant attraction to anyone before in your life. Sure, his looks contribute quite a bit, but it's much more than that. You and he seem to have a similar intellect, his passion and aptitude for prose matching your own knowledge and understanding of philosophy and the humanities. The girl is also equally respected by him as she is by you, and you both share a common want to see her thrive. You've known them both barely a day and a half, but they already feel more like family than anyone you've ever known.
You wonder if you're imagining his affections toward you. That could just be him, his way of communicating. You desperately hope it's more than that, but you also can't get your hopes up because of a silly dream.
A silly, beautiful dream.
Water drips from your hair, down your chest, and into the towel. As you begin to shiver, you decide to return to bed and try again for some uninterrupted sleep. You'll have to change the sheets, unfortunately, but that shouldn't take more than a few minutes.
You open the door and tiptoe back out into the hallway, quiet as a mouse. Just as you're about to sneak back into your room, towel clutched tightly in your fingers, you're startled by the door opposite your own sliding open.
And there he is. Dressed in little more than a pair of grey shorts, hair tousled and eyes weary with sleep.
He blinks a few times, and then his eyes widen, suddenly much more awake. You see him glance down, and his mouth parts ever so slightly before his gaze returns to your face.
You are frozen in place. Somewhere in your mind, you will your feet to dart away again, but the remnants of your dream still echo in your muscles, preventing you from leaving. Your hands tighten on your towel and despite yourself, you make note of his chest, his abdomen - the wound, which is an angry red line, held together with clear stitching, and which makes your heart clench at the thought of what would've happened had you not arrived - and finally, a rapid glance at his shorts, his thighs, before you find your sense and look back up at his face.
There's that intensity again, with considerably less gentleness. You inhale sharply, and spare a glance towards the sitting area, where the girl sleeps.
"She's quite the light sleeper, I'm afraid. I'd be mightily surprised if she didn't already hear --"
His voice is low, nearly inaudible to your ears as you look back at him. The tone of it causes the insides of your thighs to tremble, and your chest to heave with silent breaths. Ezra cuts himself off, clearly not having meant to say as much as he did.
Maybe it's the early hour that makes the words escape your lips with ease. Maybe it's the dream, the visions of which you can still see in your mind's eye as you look at him. Perhaps there's just something about Ezra that makes you bold, standing there with nothing more than thin terrycloth protecting your modesty.
"Hear what, Ezra?" you whisper, and set your jaw when his eyes widen ever so slightly.
Ezra reaches out, and his hand comes up to grip the back of your neck. His thumb strokes your jawline, behind your ear, and he steps forward. He's so close that you can feel the heat from his body on your own.
His lips press softly against your forehead, a surprisingly intimate gesture that makes you shiver. The hand that isn't clutching your towel moves to rest on his waist, golden skin warm under your cold fingers.
"Hear this, sweet thing," he murmurs against your skin, lips still pressed against you. "How strongly I feel for you. How deeply I know that it was divine providence that brought you to me. The ways I want to repay you for saving my life.”
His words are like molten gold, shimmering and hot as they slip over your skin and into your heart. You shiver, and your fingers curl gently into his side.
”I don’t - I don’t want you to feel obligated to... to do anything. With me. For me,” you whisper back, eyes closed, basking in the feeling of this quiet moment. 
Ezra hums in dissent against your worries. “No... no...” he says, as his fingers slowly thread their way into your hair. “It isn't like that —“
He’s interrupted by a shuffling sound from the sitting room. You both freeze, wide-eyed, and look toward the room where the girl sleeps.
A moment passes, and then two. Enough that you know she is still asleep and there isn’t any risk of her finding you two like this.
It‘s like ice water thrown over you, the reminder of where and who you are. You look back up to Ezra, whose eyes are soft and knowing as they stare at you. His hand gently caresses the back of your neck, and then he brings it back to rest at his side.
"Go to bed, sweetheart," he murmurs, and then steps around you. He enters the refresher without another word.
You do as he says, but you find yourself struggling to fall back asleep once you return to clean, cool sheets. You watch the stars inch past outside your window as your mind races at the memory of his lips.
-
The next morning, you wake to sounds of movement coming from outside your door. For a moment you panic, before you remember your two visitors. And then you remember your encounter with one of those visitors last night, and the hushed words exchanged between you and him.
Beside you, the clock reads barely past 06:00, which is usually the time you wake up anyway. Today you have another shift at the bar, assuming you still have a job there after you ditched it the other day. With a groan, you pull yourself out from under the warm, soft covers and dress yourself. 
The noise becomes more decipherable as you make your way down the hallway. Ezra and the girl are making small talk while something sizzles. You turn the corner and see Ezra standing at the stove with the girl sitting at the counter, the pleasing aromatic smell of pork bacon wafting through the air. You lean against the wall and watch the pair with a small smile, happy to see someone making use of a space normally reserved for microwave rations and alcohol snuck from the bar.
No one's ever accused you of being a particularly good bartender, that's for sure.
Ezra turns to look at you when he hears your footsteps, a bright smile lighting up his face. 
"Good morning, sleepyhead," he teases, and pushes the bacon around with a spatula. "I cannot emphasize enough how divine it was to wake up with a soft cushion beneath me rather than dirt. I could much too easily let myself get used to this, and I think Cee here agrees with me on that account. Don't you, birdie?"
The girl nods, but you don't notice it. The color has drained from your face and you feel a frantic, sinking feeling in your chest.
"What did you say?" you ask, pushing yourself off the wall and looking at Ezra with wide eyes.
He looks back, brow furrowed, confused. "I believe I said that I could get used to this...?"
You turn away from him and look at the girl. She's looking at you too, now, concern evident in her eyes.
"What did he say your name is?"
She blinks. "My name's Cee."
Your hand flies up to your mouth, and you feel tears gather at the corners of your eyes. It can't be. But she's the right age, and her hair's the same, and...
"What was your father's name?"
She looks even more confused now. "Um, it was Damon."
Oh my god. "Oh my god. You're Cee."
The two of them stare at you like you've grown a second head. You laugh, realizing how foolish you look.
And then you give her your name.
Cee's eyes light up like nothing you've ever seen before, and she nearly launches herself off of the counter stool to wrap you in the tightest hug you've ever been given. You laugh again, a loud and boisterous thing, as happy tears spring unbidden and flow onto your cheeks. Her hands grip the back of your shirt as you hold her head to your chest with both hands.
"I never thought I'd see you again," you mutter through the tears, pressing your nose against her hair. It's her. It's really her. Suddenly you think Ezra was right about divine providence, that the three of you were meant to find each other, the event arranged by some mighty cosmic force.
"Dad told me you were dead," she cries, as the two of you collapse to the floor. Propriety suddenly no longer concerns you, not now that you're cradling your long-lost little sister.
"I'm so sorry, Cee. I'm so sorry."
You can't say much more than that. There are simultaneously too many and not enough things to say to the last family you have left in the universe, to this girl who was so much like you even in the first moments of knowing one another. 
Above you, Ezra clears his throat.
"While this is clearly an unexpected but happy reunion that I hate to interrupt, I do have to ask how you girls know one another, so that I might not be kept in the dark about your relation?"
You look up at him as you move backwards to rest your shoulders against the wall. His dark eyes look down at you from above, and though you've never felt so small, you've also never felt happier in your life.
"She's my sister," you answer with a smile. "Same mother, different father. We were separated when our mother died. She was hardly more than a baby."
Ezra's eyes grow soft at that, and he nods. You begin to think that maybe now you both have something to thank the other for. You may have saved his life, but his radio transmission brought you Cee.
You tighten your arms around her, and place a kiss on the crown of her head. You aren't sure how long you sit there - long enough to have surely lost your job when you don't show up for your shift, but you can't find it within yourself to care. This is all that matters to you right now.
-
The day passes with you and Cee doing most of the talking, for once. Ezra seems content to just sit and listen, though you catch him a few times looking at you like he did in the darkened hallway last night.
After lunch, he makes a point to sit next to you on the couch, arm draped across the cushions behind you.
If Cee notices, she doesn't say anything. You still aren't sure where your relationship with Ezra stands, but in the midst of sharing stories with Cee and learning about her life, you don't find time to sort that out.
Dinner comes and goes again, and the topic of the future comes up.
"When do you think you'll be healed enough to travel again, Ezra?" you ask, as the three of you work on cleaning the dishes.
He shrugs. "I'm fit to travel right now," he answers, and you give him a look. No, he isn't. He chuckles. "Alright, sugar. Maybe another day or so. The serum they gave me to apply daily has been working wonders, I must admit."
You nod, and look over at Cee. "Where do you want to go? The Ephrate? I have no doubt you could get into the school there."
She perks up at that. "You think so? Would you bring me?"
"Why not? I'm a traveler anyway, and I think it's high time I got out of this station. Ezra?" You look over to him, but he's already looking at you.
You feel his hand ghost over the small of your back. "I would be most honored to accompany you both to the Ephrate, if you'll have me."
"Yes, of course," you reply, leaning into his touch, and you turn back to the task at hand.
Later on, when Cee is in bed listening to her music, and Ezra's in his room, you sit on your bed thinking about what's to come. In order to apply to the school, Cee will need a guardian contact, and a record of education. You hope she can pass the entrance exam and submit a writing sample, and that that will be enough. Maybe you can talk some of your former professors into considering her.
It’s a pretty long trip from the station to the Ephrate, even with a ship that can travel at hyper speed. You can’t help but wonder what will become of Ezra after you get Cee set up in school. 
The man captivates you, to put it plainly. His poetic manner of speaking and the gentle fire of his passion, when directed at you, gives you a feeling unlike any other you’ve experienced before. You’ve met plenty of men in your life. None have ever made you feel such a way. 
Before you can think better of it, while the desire to see his sleep-ruffled hair still sits at the forefront of your mind, you get out of bed and leave your room. Quietly, so as to not disturb Cee, you knock on his door.
”Come in!” he calls out from somewhere within.
You slide the door open, slip inside, and close the door behind you. Ezra is sitting up in bed, looking at you.
”To what do I owe the pleasure of seeing such a beautiful woman enter my chamber in the night?” The question is teasing, good-natured, but the compliment still makes your stomach swoop.
You smile, and walk to where he lies in bed, leaning against the dresses. “I wanted to thank you, Ezra. You brought my sister back to me, which is something I’ll never be able to repay you for. Can we call it even?” 
He laughs at that. “Sure we can, sweet thing. You know, when I first saw you in that recovery room, I thought I recognized you from somewhere, and that my brain had done me the disservice of erasing all memory of you. I now realize it was because you and Cee are so much alike. I haven’t known her for much longer than I’ve known you, and it remains a miracle that she has given me even a modicum of trust, but I see the relation between you clear as a bell now.”
You have to smile at that. It warms your heart to know you didn’t imagine it, that someone else noticed it too.
Ezra reaches out then, in the dim light, and you step forward. Thinking he's reaching for your hand, you extend yours - but he bypasses it completely and wraps his hand around the back of your upper thigh, thumb brushing against your sleep shorts. A giggle escapes your lips as he pulls you in even closer to him. Ezra leans forward and presses his face against your midsection, nose just next to your belly button.
Confused, but certainly pleasantly surprised, you place your hands on his head and thread your fingers through his dark curls. Gently you massage his scalp, not quite understanding this sudden show of affection. It's different than last night, though you can't exactly express how. 
You decide you're really enjoying seeing these different sides of Ezra when the two of you are alone.
When you happen to massage a certain spot right behind his ear, Ezra groans, a low sound that ripples through your bones. His grip tightens, and you feel his next words more than you hear them.
"Come here, little one," he murmurs into your stomach, nosing at the hem of your shirt. The pet name makes you clench, desire flooding through your center. 
He pulls you closer, shifting his face away so he can guide you down onto the bed. You swing one leg over his waist just as he slides his hand up to grip your ass, turning you further so you're on your back next to him. He's on his side, propped up by his elbow, leaning over you.
You're breathless, staring up into those infinite brown eyes.
"You have consumed my every waking thought since the moment I first saw you" he says softly, his voice a low purr that awakens some unknown part of yourself. You turn into him, resting a hand on his side, and he presses his nose against your cheek.
"I must have been a saint in a previous life to have earned this sweet embrace," he continues, breath warm against your face. "I want to learn you, to study you with the same vigor the ancients studied and examined the mind. I want to know you, sweet girl, in every way possible.
"But I must be truthful with you, because I could no longer live with myself if I were not. I am not a good man. I have lived a long life of violence and amorality, and death and deceit seem to follow me hand-in-hand. You are so young, little one, full of life and vitality, future bright ahead of you. I do not deserve you, and you certainly deserve better than me."
His words are like needles piercing your heart. You slide your hand up his chest to cup his face, tenderly stroking his cheekbone. You draw him away ever so slightly so you can look him in the eye.
"You and I are not so different, Ezra," you hum, making sure that he keeps the eye contact. "I have been on that same path, of death and violence, for years. I've lived for none but myself."
You slide your thumb across his lower lip, soft and pink and tempting.
"Let me live for you." 
You punctuate your whispered plea by drawing him back down and pressing your lips to his. He gasps into the kiss before returning it with passion amplified twofold. His leg slides over your midsection to stabilize himself, knees pushing in between your own so your thighs stretch open around his.
Ezra deepens the kiss almost immediately. You surrender to his lips, one hand gripping his shoulder while the other tangles again in his hair. His mouth is hot, tasting faintly of mint but mostly a sweet flavor you attribute only to him. You let out a soft moan at the feeling building in your cunt, wet and warm and yearning for him, and he uses the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. Ezra licks at your teeth, seemingly in an attempt to map out every part of you that he can.
All you're able to do is moan, melting into him like a candle to a flame.
You feel Ezra shift a little, followed by profanity muttered softly against your lips. He draws away, and you open your eyes to see him clenching his jaw.
"'M still not fully adjusted to not having a kriffing arm," he grumbles, frustration evident in his eyes. You hum, hurting for him, wanting to take his pain away.
"What do you need, Ezra?" you ask. "What can I do?"
He presses his forehead against yours and sighs. "I want to see you, sweet thing. I want to touch you."
You flush, understanding the meaning of his words and feeling your panties grow wetter at the implication. 
"Yes," you breathe. "Yes." You push at his shoulders, urging him to sit back. He does so, sitting back. You rearrange your legs so that yours rest outside of his, and sit up. Your thighs are tucked against his hips in a position that feels much closer than before - you can just barely feel the heat of his groin against your own. A breath stumbles its way out of your lungs, chest heaving.
Before you can think any further on your insecurities, you grasp the hem of your shirt and draw it up and over your head. Ezra's eyes light up, glance at your face, darken considerably as he looks down again, and then he's on you once more.
His arm wraps around you tightly, hand pressing firmly into your ribs, and it's then that you really take in the size difference between you and him. As his head dips to press his lips against your breasts and nipples, you can't help but shudder at the way his body curls over your own. You feel distinctly small, in a way that would usually frighten you but instead makes you shiver.
This position is clearly more comfortable for Ezra, because he becomes more vocal as he lavishes your tits with attention.
"Gods, little one," he murmurs against the top of one of your breasts, tongue darting out to taste your peaked bud, "your body is divine, the sweetest fruit in the universe." He pauses to suck at your nipple, drawing it into his mouth, and the sight of it forces a whine from your throat. Something about it is so perfect, so perverse, for a man who's always been so sweet, that you can't help but press your clothed cunt down on his cock, the shape of which you can feel burning and hard like an iron through your clothes.
Ezra lets out a choked growl at that, a deep rumbling sound that you immediately commit to memory, in case of the unfortunate event that you're not blessed to ever hear it again. He releases your teat, now spit-soaked and throbbing, and looks at you with eyes so dark you hardly recognize them. His brows are drawn together, teeth bared like a feral animal.
"That's what you do to me," he growls, moving his hand down to cup your ass, squeezing harshly. You gasp, and press into him, bare chest to bare chest. "Feel my dick against your little pussy, baby? Think it can fit?"
You nod frantically, knowing your shorts are soaked through, as his filthy words send your mind reeling. You're not capable of thoughts beyond him and this any longer.
Ezra uses his grip on your ass to press your cunt against him once more, and he rolls his hips up into you in a mimicry of what he'd like to do you. You moan, completely unashamed, and drop your head to tuck your face against his shoulder.
"Please," you whine, nearly unaware of the words coming out of your mouth. It's quiet, hushed, this next utterance, and it's passed through your lips before you can think twice about it.
"Please fuck me, daddy."
Ezra freezes. It takes you a moment too long to realize what you've said.
"What did you say?" Ezra asks, the words rumbling from somewhere in his chest.
You get a frantic feeling in your limbs, panic crawling up your throat. Great, you think, I've messed it all up. He probably thinks I'm some freak, screwed up in the head.
You're broken from your spiraling thoughts by the feeling of his lips on your neck, teeth digging into the space beneath your jawline.
"I asked you a question, sweet girl."
You tremble in his grasp. He's not going to let it go. "Daddy..." you whimper, and he groans.
"You really are a perfect little girl for me," he mutters as his hand slides around from your ass to the front of your shorts. You tighten your grip on the back of his neck and lean forward, thinking he intends to pull your remaining clothes down your legs.
Instead, he clenches his fist and tears them, both your shorts and your panties, from your pussy. You yelp as he does so, and watch as the fabric goes flying somewhere off to the side.
"There you are, sweet thing," he murmurs, leaning back to look at you, hand back in position on your bare ass. "Look at you. Filthy and perfect for daddy, aren't you? A fantasy come to life, placed in my lap by the gods themselves."
You moan once more, pressing your bare cunt against the outline of his cock in his thin sleep pants. He reaches down to pull it free, and as you keep your balance against him, you look down and see perhaps the biggest dick you've ever laid eyes on. Ezra chuckles, watching your reaction.
"You ready, baby? Want me to fill you up, fuck you like you need?"
You nod, and lean in to press your face against the crook of his neck again. "Please," you whine. "I need your big cock in my pussy."
The words are completely unlike you - something about Ezra has awoken a completely submissive, unfiltered side of yourself you didn't know existed before. Sure, you knew you wanted him, and weren't a stranger to sex, but this is an entirely new personality, focused entirely on being his. It's almost like a dream, and for a moment you feel as though you're floating, with how relaxed you are in anticipation for --
Oh.
He's guided the head of his cock to your entrance, and is using his leverage on your ass to guide you slowly, slowly down. You gasp - he's certainly the biggest you've ever had, and the stretch is delicious. Ezra's restraining himself, going slow so he doesn't hurt you, but you have no such qualms.
You drop down in one fell swoop, and the way he fills you makes your eyes roll back in your head. His hand moves from your ass to around your waist, nearly encircling it entirely. He groans, loudly and deeply.
"You'll kill me like this, little one. You're just wrapped around my cock, aren't you? Desperate for it?"
You nod frantically. "Yes, daddy. Yes!"
Ezra moans at that. His hand grips your waist, teeth biting and sucking at your neck, as you push up on your thighs to lift off of him. The drag of his dick against the walls of your cunt is incredible, the head of it catching and pushing on hidden, sensitive ridges within you.
You drop down again, and begin to fuck yourself on Ezra's cock.
His hips piston up as you do so, finding and matching your rhythm with ease. His melodic voice mutters the dirtiest things you've ever heard as he slams his hips up into you.
"...That's it, sweet thing. You were made to fit on my cock, weren't you?..."
"...Wanted to do this that night in the hallway, take you right up against the wall..."
"...My strong, sweet girl, bouncing like a whore on daddy’s cock -- gods, look at your tits..."
You feel your climax building, rising like a fire about to consume you from the inside out. Ezra is close, too, from the way his hips stutter and his breathing becomes ragged.
"Sweet thing..." he groans, slowing his thrusts. "I can't... inside you..."
You shake your head. You know he's clean, since he was tested at the med-bay when he went in for the operation. And besides...
"I've got the implant, daddy. Come in me, please."
Ezra finishes with the most beautiful moan you've ever heard, and you come nearly at the same moment. It's an ethereal, heavenly experience, like the two of you have ascended and joined the gods who so graciously brought you together.
You fall asleep tucked into his chest, warm under his blanket, with the smell of him and you and both of you lulling you into the most peaceful sleep you've had in your life.
-
A month later, you and Ezra and Cee sit at a mahogany wood table, filling out a holo-tablet with the form for Cee's entrance into your alma mater on the Ephrate. Your sister is already taken with the place, and you couldn't be happier for her. 
"Now it wants me to put in a parent or guardian's name," she says, stylus hovering over that section. The cursor blinks as it waits.
You're about to tell her to skip it, but Ezra speaks up before you can.
"Put my name down," he offers, and she looks over at him. "Is that okay with you?"
Cee nods, a genuine smile brightening her features. She turns back to the screen with haste.
"Ezra Stallard," he adds simply.
You look over to him, pleased with this revelation. 
As you watch Cee enter Ezra's full name into the blank and select Guardian, you get a chill up your spine. Despite yourself, you think back to that night, and you know Ezra's thinking the same when his hand moves over to rest on your thigh.
You can't wait to have your ship to yourselves; the joy of seeing your sister thrive in a new setting is followed only by the anticipation of what is to come. You and Ezra have made no plans for the future yet - all you know is that he will be with you, and that's the only guarantee you need.
For the first time in a very long time, your heart sings.
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all-about-remadora · 4 years ago
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200 followers!
So here’s a list of One shots for celebrate✨
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Everyone Deserves A Someone by LoquaciousLupin
With nothing better to do during the holidays at Grimmauld Place, Hermione and Ginny wonder whether their former Professor has a special someone - with no other ideas, they do the only thing they can and ask him. With a little help from Tonks, Remus answers their questions as honestly... as he can. Remus and Tonks fluff.
A Beautiful Tune by SweetDeamon
I'm...not coming." he said, reaching to shove his hands deep into his pockets. "On the mission. With you." Tonks stared at him in confusion. "Why not?" she asked, grip upon the cloak in her hand going limp. Remus struggled to come up with a convincing lie. "Because I...I..." Because I'm dying. Because you've struck me dead in the heart.
The Unspeakable Girl by SweetDeamon
"She makes me feel so on top of this world that I wish I'd never been born into it in the first place! So I can't stand to talk about her, Dad! I simply can't!" In which Remus Lupin visits his father and confesses something quite extraordinary. Based on information from POTTERMORE. Consider yourselves warned. RLNT.
The Future's Not Ours To See by Gilpin
Remus Lupin has a lot on his mind; his current undertaking for the Order of the Phoenix, and how to obtain questionable potions from an unhelpful Apothecary owner. Can he bring both to a satisfactory conclusion?
Rhapsody in Blue by copperbadg
Remus has decided it's time to cure Tonks of her awkwardness, the only way he knows how.
Kissing It Better by Lady Bracknell
On her first date with Remus, Tonks discovers that spilt beer on wooden floors is the enemy of the less than surefooted everywhere. Will she die of embarrassment, or will Remus find a way to make it all better?
Kiss and tell by Lady Bracknell
For all his supposed genius, Sirius Black had always had rather a blind spot for the patently obvious.
What To Make Of Him by Lady Bracknell
Neither Ted nor Andromeda know quite what to make of their daughter's boyfriend. Can he win them round over Sunday lunch?
On First Impressions by  cafei-au-lei
"'You know,' Sirius said, 'it's kind of funny. For someone who thinks Remus is so annoying, you sure can't seem to stop talking about him.'" A series of moments in Remus and Tonks' developing relationship as they get to know each other and learn that maybe first impressions aren't necessarily everything. OOTP. Fluffy oneshot.
The Order's Most Eligible Bachelors by cafei-au-lei
The Order's Most Eligible Bachelors, or: the ladies indulge in some firewhiskey and gossip. Sirius and Remus stumble upon a game they're not sure they want to be privy to (okay, maybe Sirius does.) The results lead to some necessary conversation and introspection for a few of the parties involved. Oneshot.
The Talk, Or: The (Lighthearted) Trauma of Teddy R Lupin by cafei-au-lei
Teddy knew when Dad brought out the firewhiskey that something was suspicious. Then again, maybe he wasn't giving Dad enough credit for being the cool parent. AU. Remus and Tonks survive to raise their son and give him The Dreaded Talk. Oneshot.
Movement by MrsTater
Things appear to have changed. One shot, RLNT
Retrograde by MrsTater
Sequel to Movement: Tonks strongly suspected, though she hadn't much experience, that it wasn't normal for adults who fancied other adults to do what she was doing now.
Kernels by MrsTater
A Transfigured Hearts outtake: a cosy night in with Remus takes an unexpected turn when popcorn finds its way into odd places and leads Tonks to make an important discovery.
Party till the wolf comes by MrsTater
Fatherhood doesn't send Remus on a pub crawl, but announcing the birth of his son to his closest friends turns out to be the next best thing.
Overheard by MrsTater
Sirius tries to play matchmaker for an ambivalent Remus and Tonks, but when everyone keeps overhearing everyone else's conversations, things get a little complicated as shapeshifters prove to be anything but predictable... Updated Sept 3, 2007
The Honeymooners by MrsTater
Two years after their wedding, Remus and Tonks finally make it on their honeymoon. But now they've got something they didn't when they first married, will they be able to stop thinking about it long enough to enjoy themselves? AU
A Conversation That’s Not About Veela by starfishstar
Harry and Professor Lupin talk about women, and other things. During Christmas of HBP. (A gen story, but with very strong hints of Remus/Tonks and Harry/Ginny.)
Sleeping by starfishstar
Tonks sleeps; Remus muses
Precisely What I Mean by starfishstar
Remus with Teddy was easily the sweetest thing Tonks had ever seen. It seemed Remus couldn't ever hold Teddy without gazing down at his son with a huge, helpless, delighted grin. "Don't your cheeks ever get tired?" Tonks couldn't help teasing him once, and he'd glanced up, bewildered by the question – he didn't even realise he was doing it.
A Slow and Stopping Curve by aegle
Concerning Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks. Set during Order of the Phoenix and Half-Blood Prince.
St. Margaret's by aegle
Remus, Tonks, a Muggle automobile, and a slightly disappointing beach adventure
On Bethlehem Down by aegle
Remus Lupin finds himself at Nymphadora Tonks' flat on Christmas Eve, 1996
The poem which i do not write by aegle
So, it has come to London with them, whatever it is.
The Watch by Sirussly
He'd grown so used to her endless chatter and relentless questions, a burning ball of energy with a laugh like her mother's. Some nights Tonks would listen to him instead, to stories of war and the price one pays for being a soldier in the middle of it. Occasionally neither of them would speak, but once her hand found his and stayed there until the sunrise coloured the sky.
Flame by Eat a Taco
It's strange what the soft light of a candle can do to someone.RLNT, sometime during HBP
Cover Me by Maggiemaye
Remus and Tonks embark on a mission that tests their well-established partnership to its limits. Even while surrounded by Death Eaters hidden in plain sight, they find that their greatest threats may come from within.
Expecto Patronum by Shimotsuki
Remus and Tonks have dinner at the Potters' after seeing Teddy off on the Hogwarts Express. James and Al are full of questions, including one that not even Harry knows the answer to.
Meet the Reindeer by SweetDeamon 
Nothing untoward had happened since Teddy had arrived home from Hogwarts for the holidays this year. So far there had been no manically jingling elves, no traumatised Santa Claus, no mass snowball fights, no exploding cans of fake snow and as of yet nothing had come hurtling down the chimney or splattered anything or anybody with ammunition of the culinary kind. So far. RLNT AU.
Meet the Teacher by SweetDeamon 
In which Remus and Dora receive word from Hogwarts that their son's homework has been completed in a far from satisfactory manner. The subject? Defence Against the Dark Arts. The topic? Werewolves. They've been expecting trouble since the beginning of term...but who feels less prepared? Teddy's parents or Teddy's teacher? Neville has a hunch... AU. RLNT. Rated for mild language.
A Study In Pink by SweetDeamon 
"He isn't entirely sure how it is that a certain pink haired witch came to be lying snugly in the bed beside him yet again, or indeed why such a thing had ever occurred the first time around..." RLNT.
A Piece of Cake by SweetDeamon 
"How long does it take to make a bloody sponge cake!" "You can't rush art, Sirius." Tonks attempts to bake Remus a birthday cake. "Attempts to" being the key phrase here... RLNT. Happy Birthday Gelly Bean!
The Christmas Waltz by Lady Bracknell 
As Christmas approaches, Remus and Tonks dance around the idea of togetherness, wondering if either of them is leading, or know where they're going at all.
Mistletoe and Wine by Lady Bracknell 
Remus falls foul of the mistletoe. Twice. RL/LP, RL/NT, LP/JP, rated for language.
Afraid of the Dark by Lady Bracknell 
Remus had always been ill at ease in the forest, but when a mission for Dumbledore sends him into the heart of the place with Tonks by his side, he finds his apprehension harder than usual to shake off.
The Luck of the Draw by Lady Bracknell 
She sits on the carpet, shuffles the cards, then deals them out. She came here with the hope of forcing the issue, because she just knows they shouldn't be about can't and won't.
Chione by: cafei-au-lei
Remus has confirmation that Tonks may return his feelings - now all that's left is to decide what to do with this rather exciting and terrifying information. And although it's been a strange year, this year's Christmas could shape up to be one of the best Remus has ever had. Takes place after "The Order's Most Eligible Bachelors." RLNT OotP holiday fluff.
The First Night by: cafei-au-lei 
Most major events in Remus' life have done nothing but reinforce the crushing inevitability of his condition and the life that it has condemned him to. But maybe there is hope to be had, after all.
amare by: cafei-au-lei 
At first, the idea that Tonks and Professor Lupin could be together was equal parts baffling and absurd. But then, maybe it did make a tiny bit of sense, Ginny thought, as she watched the way Professor Lupin looked at Tonks over the breakfast table. But she still couldn't help but think that this love and relationships thing was far too complicated. RLNT.
War Baby by MrsTater 
It's time for Teddy's first outing, and for Tonks to make peace with a noble great idiot. Set during Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.
Perchance To Dream by: MrsTater
A dream leads to an argument and an unexpected quest to seek out the meaning. Will Remus and Tonks kiss and make up? More importantly, who will come out on top? RLNT, Deathly Hallows, Mature.
Like a Cat in the Sun by starfishstar 
Remus is in a house full of women.
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chayacat · 3 years ago
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Devil’s Sweet Star (42)
Fandom: Dead by Daylight
Ghostface x Female Reader  
Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  
***
Ah... that expression of shock on your face, that lack of reaction... Or at least that frail voice that is yours. Danny couldn't have dreamed of a better reaction from you. We would think we were in a movie, where the girl discovers a terrible secret about her boyfriend. This is actually the case, with one exception: We are not in a movie. Danny watched you, his sneaky smile on his lips, like a cat watching the little mouse in his cage, the lion watching the gazelle, or the wolf devouring the poor little doe that will soon serve as his meal. He was slowly moving towards you, but you backed up against the wall, causing him to stop.
“Surprise, Honey. Happy to see me?” He said with a provocative smile.
“J-Jed? No... I don't believe it. It's a nightmare... or a prank! You can't...” you start to say.  
“Can’t what? Being the one who since all this time harasses you every night making you doubt about your loyalty to your boyfriend? I can tell you my sweet little star, that all this is real. But... let's redo the presentations. Jed... never existed. My real name is Danny, Danny Johnson, to serve you.”
“You've been lying to me all this time... But why??”
“Think twice Sherlock. I am... quite wanted in other states. I wasn't going to swing my true identity, to a complete stranger I had just met. And then... there was a good chance... that you have heard of me. But luckily for me... that was not the case.”
“Your office...”
“Want to take a look? since the time you wish to enter it, now that you know the truth, I can show you. Follow me.”
Danny walked past you, while looking behind him to see if you were following him. He unlocked the door of his office and opened it so that you could finally enter it. He saw this expression of surprise on your face again, and this temporary absence of voice made him shudder. Everything went as he had imagined. It remains more than to know how all this would end.
“It's you who... who did all these murders... these innocent people... McKellan and... Hoggins.” You said finally.
“Nice deduction Sherlock. This is me. All those nights when I was inventing an excuse to go out... it was only for that. Spying, stalking... and kill.” Respond Danny leaning against the door.
“And also, to see me as Ghostface. You... you tried... you tried to rape me... and you pretended nothing had happened the next day.”
“And I apologize for that. But I had to... play my role. You would have suspected me too soon otherwise. I had to dissuade you from Jed. Let you accept me as I am. More confident, more... Enterprising then Jed." Replied Danny.
“From the beginning you lied to me. On everything. Your identity, your past, your work... I'm sure this story about this Carla is not real! You invented it or stole it from someone!” you said a little angry.
“Everything I told you about my past... is true. My parents were real assholes. Treating me like a dog. And as for my life with Carla... everything is true. Except one thing: When I learned that Dr. Pheels, the one who cared for her, had let her die, I went to see him one night. I entered through the window. He was in his office. I confronted him with his actions and he... he has denied everything.  *You won't be able to prove anything Johnson. No one will believe you, you're wasting your time, Johnson. You'd better leave and find yourself another jug to fill your nights. And if she's sick... think of me. You can touch a small part. * At that time... I took out a knife that I had taken from home... and I slaughtered him like never before. My first murder, the one that made me who I am today. This is where Jed Olsen was born as well.”  
“And I would still be there. You won't get rid of me as easily. I've told you before: I'm a part of you now.” said Jed in Danny’s mind.  
“That night. You could have killed me. You could have made me yet another victim of your massacres. And yet you left me alive, you played with me, you... persuaded me to kill Hoggins. At least to let you kill him. Why? Why didn't you kill me that night?” you ask calmly.  
It's true. He could have killed you that night. It would have made you just another victim and move on after hiding your corpse somewhere. He could have done it so many times... But he didn't. On the contrary, he lets you live, he spends time with you, shares his life and his past as you did with him. By curiosity? that's what he's always said to himself so far... but in the end isn't it for another reason? Isn't it more because he has found, or at least he thinks he has found something he thought was lost forever? And that he wanted to protect at all costs?
“Lying to her won't do much good here Danny. We both know that. Be honest with her. Like she was with you. And be honest with yourself. Believe me.” said Jed in Danny’s mind, leaning in front of him.  
“I could have. At first, I confess that I did it out of curiosity, to see how far you could amuse me and I would have killed you as soon as you bore me. But... you were... so innocent. But just as fierce. Like Carla. She was like you, dreams full of heads, with punchlines when it was necessary. And a heart of gold, always ready to help people and do good around her. And the more time I spent with you, the more I felt like I was reliving my life before.” responds Danny sincerely to you.  
“Good choice. It's a bit late, but better late than never.” replied Jed smiling.
“Now, that's the question everyone is asking. You know everything. What are you going to do?” Asks Danny to you.  
Danny looked you straight in the eye, his smile having sag to make way for a more serious face. He had his knife in hand, ready to use it if you ever try to play the heroes or warn the police. He would like to not do that, but his secret has to come first. Even if it means killing you. He doesn't want to, but he won't have a choice. He no longer has a choice, and neither do you. You could have stopped before, avoided this relationship. It would have been easier for him. But here... it will be the first time for him that he will have to kill someone reluctantly. There is no turning back now. For both of you. This is where everything will play out.
Deep in his mind... Danny knows how it's going to end. There is no chance that you will accept all this. Even if you have shown flaws, he knows that you will denounce him, or try to stop him. If that really happens, so be it. But he can't help but hope. What a stupid spirit of humanity. And yet, what was not his surprise, when he saw you approaching him hugging him. For a few minutes, he waited for you to take out a knife or a weapon of some kind to attack him. But nothing. Absolutely nothing. Just... a normal hug. As if none of this had happened. Nothing had been said.
“Well... I... I didn't expect that. Unless this is a ruse on your part.” said Danny suspicious.
“What good would it be now that I try anything against you? You said it: if you fall, I will fall too. And... you may be an assassin... you've always been there when I needed... you listened to me, you protected me. You could have killed me a long time ago... and you didn't. And all those moments we spent together... I could never forget them. Never.” You respond without letting him go.  
“Me neither.”
“I guess you've made it. You have succeeded in making me your accomplice. That's what you wanted. You wanted me to enter your world.”
“It won't be easy... but I would teach you to get ready for this new life. Lie... Keep one's mouth shut... Trick... As long as you are with me, nothing will happen to you.”
Danny gently took your face with his gloved hand before placing a quick kiss on your lips. But before he can back off, you kiss him passionately, hugging him a little more. He is not a doctor, or even a psychologist, but he could easily conclude that he caused you to have Stockholm syndrome. Or at least something close to it. However, he will have to be careful in the early days. He doesn't know if all this is real... or if you cheat. It's in Danny's mentality, he was betrayed too often in his youth, he will not let himself be fooled so easily.
“We're going to have to put ... two three little things to the point. First, outside of these walls, and when someone comes here, I'm Jed. no one should know my true identity. Not even Mattew and Melina.” starts Danny.  
“It's horrible... to have to lie to them. They're friends, I'm sure they would understand.” you respond.  
“They will especially warn the cops. At least after researching me. Journalistic curiosity, honey, can wreak a lot of havoc. Especially at the level of the closest people. Second, if the police come to ask you about Hoggins, you say you don't know anything. You tell them that the last time you saw him was when he threatened you in your café. Your employees will be able to confirm this.”
“Because I have to use them as an excuse now?” you replied.  
“Everyone around you can serve as an alibi. I've done it often... very often during all these years.” responds Danny shrugging his shoulders.
“Anything else to know?”
“Even if you know about my office, I'd appreciate not seeing you inside. Everyone has their own business. Was I clear enough?”
“Yeah.”  
“Good. So, how was your day?” Danny asks as if nothing had happened.
“As usual... I had two calls. For the succession, it is settled. And my aunt can't wait to meet you one of these days. But other than that, nothing very extraordinary. I'm exhausted.” you respond sighing.  
“I know exactly what you need to... relax.”
Danny slowly lowered his hands until he reached your ass, putting a small slap. You jump slightly before looking at him, biting your lips slightly. A smirk comes to his face, provoking you just with the look. His piercing blue eyes, the secret of his charm. And it is in a fiery kiss that you both direct in the room, undressing each other before finding yourself on the bed, completely naked. The kiss continued, more sensual, and Danny finally entered you, making you moan with pleasure. He waited for you to relax before he began to move, and every move caused the two of you an insatiable pleasure.
No need to hide, no need to live under Jed's identity, no need to be Ghostface to satisfy his fantasies. Now that you know everything, now that you know who he is, he can finally be himself. He will continue to "play" Jed outside his walls because it is not necessary to arouse the suspicions of either office colleagues or the police. And even less of Wilhelm. This guy is a real leech.  
Now with you he can finally be himself. You are the sweet little star of the devil. And no one will be able to approach you. In every sense of the word... the beast has been released. And nothing can stop it.
Not even himself.
***
(And it's done! This chapter was quite quick to write because since it is the continuation of the previous chapter, the ideas came to me quite quickly. Well, it's true that almost the entire chapter is mostly dialogue between Danny and the reader, but really, I didn't see how I could write it other than that. I don't forget the fic RE8 and the little teasing I talked about! By the way, if at the moment you do not know what to play, whether on Switch or PC, I recommend Road 96, a real surprise that I love! I hope you’ll like this chapter like the others ones! Well, it's time for my brain to rest! Have a great weekend to you all!  See ya!)
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justcallmenikki7 · 5 years ago
Text
Love at first Sight
BTS!Twilight!Au & Supernatural!Au
Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader
Summary: Trying to be a good college student, you decide to study with your best friend in the universities library. But all it takes is one look at the bunny like boy to find your soulmate. 
Warnings: FLUUUF, Jungkook trying to be patient with you but all he wants is for you to accept him and the imprint bond, angst, minor character death, Werewolf!Jungkook, BTS in general, reader nervous and trying to decide what’s right
W.C.: 4k
Notes: So, I have had this in my drafts for so long, and I was wanting to stick with the headcanons, but I was wanting to get this out so badly so I am doing just that. I will have Jungkook’s HC posted soon!!
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Ever since you met Lisa Manoban at the age of sixteen, you entered the world of the supernatural. At first, you had no clue about the supernatural, even though you were friends with a vampire for a year, Lisa had kept her identity hidden from you. You were oblivious, never catching onto how she would stay up all night, not once being tired, how she was constantly cold, and how she had talked about history as if she lived in it. In your defense, you believed that she was a huge history geek.
But that was all washed away when you walked in on her sucking blood from a human. Looking back on it, the both of you laugh about the situation. But in that moment, you believed that you were somehow drugged on your way to her house. In honesty, you were very calm about the whole situation, minus the dead body on the ground fifteen feet away from you.
Two years later, you believe that you are a genius when it comes to the supernatural. Having a best friend who is a three-hundred-year-old vampire who has told you everything about the supernatural world is cool. Learning about demons, ghosts, werewolves, vampires, and even Gods is handy.
“Why can’t the dogs stay outside where they belong?” Your best friend, Lisa, groaned.
“Why are you even breathing? You don’t need to breathe,” you commented, not looking up from your textbook.
“Because I enjoy the smell of old books, but the dogs are tainting it with their wet dog smell,” she countered back, knowing that the werewolves themselves can hear her. A growl ripping through the air was a tell-tale sign that they did, only to be answered by a smirk from Lisa.
Lisa, in short, can be considered as a sadistic person because she loved messing with people, especially the wolves. You knew that she could defend herself, being alive for 300 years has given here plenty of experience to take care of herself.
“Can you stop tormenting the wolves and help me study?” You asked, looking up at her.
Pouting, “I guess.”
Movement from the other side of the room caught your attention. Looking over, your eyes were met with a pair of doe like eyes. That was when you felt like everything was put together – as if you found the one thing that you have been searching for your entire life.
“Oh, hell no,” you heard Lisa protest, standing up, collecting both of yours books, shaking you out of your trance.
The sound of a primal, possessive growl cut through the air, making a shiver of familiarity and want go down your spine. But then you also wanted to calm down them and make sure that they are okay.
“What’s going on? Why are we leaving?”
Before your questions could be answered, you felt a warm presence behind you. All you wanted to do was fall back into them, to be able to soak up their warmth and hide away in what you would consider to be home.
“Back away from my mate, blood sucker.” The person behind you demanded, leaving no room for questions.
“Blood sucker? Oh, that’s fucking rich.” Lisa gave out a sarcastic laugh, stepping around the table to get closer to the wolf that you have yet to put a name too.
Turning around, you were met with the one and only, Jeon Jungkook. You were at first confused on why he was so close to you, and even associating with you guys. But once his eyes met yours, you put the pieces together.
You are Jeon Jungkook’s imprint.
Lisa has told you stories about how only a select group of supernatural creatures have an imprint. She told you about how since the beginning of time, werewolves had a mate for life, or imprint, given to them. If that werewolf was rejected, then they were to become physically, mentally, and emotionally empty because they have lost their other half. In some rare cases, they die from depression. Nothing, no one, could heal them and bring them back to normal. They literally cannot move on.
“That is why I am very happy that vampires do not have an imprint because I’d rather die than be rejected by the one person I am made for,” Lisa admitted.
That is why he called you his mate, you added.
That is why you were in that trance.
Oh shit. Mentally you are face palming yourself for being slow.
Standing up from your chair, you stepped in between the two angry supernatural beings.
“Hold on,” you began.
“There’s no holding on. He just called me a fucking blood sucker.” Lisa practically screamed, hating that title.
“Lisa,” you said calmly, knowing how to handle her. “Go wait for me outside and we can go back to my place and study, okay?”
“You’re not going with her.” Jungkook jumped in, stepping closer to you.
Turning towards him, eyes narrowed. “And you do not have the ability, or say, or right, to tell me what I can and cannot do.” Your voice was stern, showing where you draw the line. Even though the look of hurt and defeat on his face made your heart clench sadly, you were not going to allow yourself to be in a position where you were bossed around.
“But she’s dangerous,” Jungkook tried to reason, desperateness evident his voice, both his inner wolf and him dreading the thought of you leaving with the vampire girl.
A scoff from Lisa confirmed that she did not go outside like you asked her too. “And you’re not?”
“She’s my imprint,” Jungkook growled, eyes turning to an almost charcoal black, hands shaking from anger.
Not knowing what to do, you stepped closer to Jungkook. Your actions seemed to have calmed him down slightly, and you could see movement behind him, alerting you that he has his pack behind him. “I know that I am your imprint, but that does not mean that you can tell me what I can and cannot do. I am going to leave with Lisa and that is final.”
Your words seemed to have broken him, and you could understand why because of how rejecting it sounded.
“You’re rejecting me?” He choked out, voice cracking and he looked so torn. The sight breaking your heart, something inside of you feels like it has died.
“No, but I need time to process this.” Your confirmation relaxed him and you, along with his pack who let out a breath that they have been holding this whole time.
Nodding his head reluctantly, he stepped away from you, something similar to a whine of sadness coming from his throat. Never has Jeon Jungkook felt so small in his life.
Giving him a sad smile, “Just give me time, please.” 
“Okay, I can do that.”
*****************************************************************************
You have to admit, Jungkook does not give up.
He has allowed you time to think about it, but you did not realize how many classes you had with him. Jungkook and his friends were rumored to be a gang called BTS, Kim Namjoon being the supposed leader. And they were not the only ‘gang’ to be at the university. There was ‘GOT7,’ ‘Seventeen’ and even ‘NCT,’ which so happened to be friends with BTS. You knew of them, having seen them around campus, but never have talked to them, besides Jung Hoseok, Jungkook’s pack member. The two of you were lab partners in Astronomy last semester.
But ever since you found out that Jungkook was your mate, he began to show up to class now. Of course, he did show up every now and then, probably three times a week. Now, he is showing up everyday and is now sitting behind you. His presence both overwhelms you and brings you a sense of security. You can feel his stare on you in class and around campus. You know that he is close by when you get a tingly feeling in your chest, a tell tale sign that tells you that your imprint is near. The both of you have yet to talk because each time he approaches you, you freak out and run away, dragging Lisa with you. You know that your actions hurt him when you do this. The tightness and longing in your chest is a sign that Jungkook is hurting. 
Every night you talk to Lisa about your situation. You have not put it off at all, something that you know that Jungkook is assuming that you are doing when Hoseok stopped you in the hallway. The thing is, you are terrified. You are terrified because you are nineteen with zero experience in the dating field. Being single your whole life is backfiring on you right now. You do not know what to expect or even know what to do. Plus, what if Jungkook is only feeling this way because you are his mate and he only wants to live? Is he just using you because you are his imprint, or does he seriously want to be with you and be committed?
Those questions earned you a slap from Lisa. “Dumbass, did you not listen to me when I explained to you how imprinting works? When a person imprints on someone, all that they see and want is them. Everyone else becomes irrelevant. Their loyalty stands with you, and their pack. Nothing and no one can break the bond that they have with you. It is said that the Moon Goddess herself made the bond not even break in death. Loyalty is the most important thing in the wolf world. I can bet my life that Jungkook is thinking about you right now. Well, I know he is because Kim Namjoon came up to me and asked me to talk to you, which is funny because he thinks that I haven’t, and gets you to talk to Jungkook. Supposedly Jungkook is acting like a scolded puppy and is pouting because you keep avoiding him.”
That is why you were not surprised when Jungkook cornered you one day (the day Lisa had to miss class) in the hallway. The distressed look on Jungkook’s face told you that he in fact is panicking. “I’m sorry, I know that I promised you that I would give you space, but I cannot stop thinking about you and needing to be in your presence. Both my wolf and I are freaking out. All we need is an answer, or at least a hint so we can calm down. I am so sorry for pressuring you.” He rushed out, leaning back to give you space. Running a hand through his hair, you could see how nervous he is.
“I’m sorry for being slow on getting back to you, I didn’t realize how badly this has been affecting you. I should’ve thought about that instead of being ignorant.”
Shaking his head violently, “No, no! Don’t apologize, I totally understand why you are taking a while. I just, my instincts were taking over because my wolf and I were needing to have some sort of contact with you to help calm down.”
“What fur color is your wolf?” You asked randomly, surprising Jungkook.
Smiling, “Black. Midnight black to be more specific,” he answered.
“That’s cool! Are you the only one with the fur color in your pack, or?”
“Yoongi-hyung has the same fur color, but his has a much darker tent than mine. Even though I have incredible sight, sometimes I can’t see him because of how well he blends in with his surroundings at night.”
“That’s really cool!” You boasted, becoming very intrigued with what you are learning about.
Jungkook flashed you a smile, making you smile back at him by how contagious it was. Clearing his throat, “So, uh, does this mean that like…”
“Yes,” you began, trying to calm your racing heart from the hopeful look on Jungkook’s face, “But, I don’t want to jump right into a relationship. I’ve never had a relationship before, and I don’t want to jump into one right yet.”
Trying to keep the sad look from showing, Jungkook still smiled brightly. “Of course! I don’t want you to be in a position where you feel uncomfortable.”
“Thanks for being understanding!”
And understanding he is.
After your guys talk, the both of you swapped phone numbers and even each other’s social media. Jungkook was determined to start a streak with you on snapchat and become your number one best friend on it, something you found funny. From then on out Jungkook became a constant in your life, a constant that Lisa does not like – mainly because she is not a fan of wolves. She, though, is happy to see how happy you have become, especially after your mother’s death. She could not deny how lovesick Jungkook is for you and how attentive he is with you. Her and the rest of BTS laugh with each other on how alert Jungkook becomes when you are doing something.
“Hey, I’m going to go and get some more ketchup.” You got up from the table and headed straight towards the counter that held the ketchup.
Lisa watched Jungkook stare at you as you walked off, never once taking his eyes off you. It was like a foreshadowing moment that Jungkook had – jumping up from his chair, he made his way towards you, tugging your arm towards him before you turned around and slipped in the puddle that was right below your feet. Lisa must admit that she did not even notice the puddle that was below your feet. Being a vampire, her eyesight and hearing are very advanced. So, seeing that Jungkook noticed it and prevented a scene of you falling, she could not deny the fondness that she is beginning to have towards the wolf.
But she believes that Jungkook has a sixth sense when it comes to you. And Jungkook does. The moment he woke up he could feel that there was something wrong with you. He does not know what, but the heavy feeling that him and his wolf felt was a sign that you were not okay.
And you are not.
Today marks the two-year death anniversary of your mom. Of course, everyday since that day has been hell, but knowing that two years ago, just a few hours before her death was the last time you got to hear her voice, feel her touch, and be with her. You hate yourself for not staying any longer with her, for not taking her with you when you had that ability.
You heard your phone buzzing like crazy, but you did not even bother with picking it up. All you did was stare at the wall in a void like state. You ignored Lisa’s knocking on your door, her calls, and worried voice. She knew what day this was, and she knew that it was going to be a difficult and long day. She was worried that you were going to relapse, worried that you will drift off into that dark place that took her months to get you out of.
That is why at 9:53 a.m. she was not that surprised to open the door to find a panicking Jeon Jungkook.
“Where is Y/N? Why is she not answering my calls?” He asked quickly, only to pause once he could sense that you were close. “What’s wrong with Y/N?”
The vampire sighed, “Jungkook, I hate that I have to say this, but Y/N may not want to see you right now. Today is a very bad day for her.”
“Please let me in.” Jungkook begged, distressed that he cannot comfort you. With that, the statement that Lisa said made Jungkook and his wolf even more distressed, if that was even possible. “I just need to be with her, help her. I won’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t.”
Running her hand down her face, Lisa sighed and allowed the wolf in after a few minutes of thinking. “Second door on the right, the door is unlocked.”
As if he was a dog chasing after a ball, Jungkook charged towards your door. Being cautious, he opened the door quietly, being met with the smell of regret, longing, and sadness. His wolf whimpered at the sight of their mate in such a depressed state. Walking in quietly, Jungkook took off his shoes and did the one thing that he knows that will work.
 Lifting the covers, he caught your attention, “Jung—”
“-Hey,” he smiled at you, not believing that he was in front of a goddess. No matter what state you are in, you will always look beautiful in his eyes.
“Why are you here and not asleep? You usually wake up at 2 in the afternoon on the weekends?”
“I could sense something is wrong.”
“I-I’m okay,” you tried to lie, but the glassy look in your eyes was forming tears. Lip wobbling, “I’m not okay,” and that was when you felt yourself break down and seek out the comfort that only your imprint could give you. Throwing yourself into his hold, you gave up on trying to keep that barrier that you have created when it comes to physical contact with the wolf.
Jungkook had a million questions that he wanted to ask you, to find out who or what has hurt you. His wolf wanted to seek out the person who has hurt his mate, to kill or torture that person that dared to mess with his mate. Jungkook felt the primal need to do so, just to make you happy. But he wanted you to be okay first, to smile again, to be happy and yourself.
For the next hour, you relished in the comfort that only Jungkook could give you. With him holding you felt like a part of you felt better, but the knowledge that your mom is still gone and that she will not be back still haunts you. Jungkook could sense that, he could sense your distress and his wolf whimpered inside of him. Running his hands through your hair (something he has been wanting to do for three months now), he could tell that it is something that helps you calm down.
“My mother passed away two years ago today,” you began. Jungkook’s hold on you tightened, encouraging you to go on. “I should’ve taken her with me instead of leaving her there by myself. I should’ve dragged her with me instead of leaving her there at that stupid mall so she could get those dumb pair of shoes that she was waiting for. I tried to convince her to wait and get them later on, but she was adamant on getting them.” You gritted out, becoming angry at yourself. “And then there was a robbery during the sale, and she was…” and you clung onto him as if he was your lifeline, nose nuzzled into his neck, finding comfort in his natural, woodsy scent.
“It’s not your fault, Y/N. You did not know, it is not your fault that your mom died, and she knows that. Blaming yourself for something that was way out of control is going to continue to make you miserable and eventually will kill you.” Jungkook said after a while. “Please stop beating yourself up over this is leading you down that road.”
You did not say anything, but when you squeezed Jungkook tightly for a minute and then released, he knew that was you acknowledging what you said. For the rest of the day the two of you spent the day in your bed, holding onto one another, talking about anything and everything. Eventually the both of you fell asleep without noticing it. Waking up the next morning entangled with one another, it felt normal. It was as if this was normal.
You realized that Jungkook is permanent and that he is not leaving you, that he is not making this all for show. So, that is why you began to stop stressing and worrying. You allowed yourself to fall, and you fell.
Ever since that day, you and Jungkook became what you call closer. You began to become physically affectionate with him and accept his affectionate ways. Jungkook obviously did sit next to you, or at least be six feet away from you in the beginning because him and his wolf needed that sense of relaxation to know that you were nearby. Now, though, Jungkook and you are touching one another in some sort of way now, whether that be your arms touching, knees touching, or him standing very close to you. You did not mind this one bit, the feeling of his body warmth had you feeling safe.
In class, now, Jungkook sits beside you, kicking the class nerd, AJ, out of his spot. His actions resulted in the silent treatment from how rude he was to the scrawny kid. During class Jungkook would whine and basically paw at your arm, wanting you to forgive him. After class, he went up to AJ and apologized, well, tried too, which earned Jungkook a please smile from you. 
The boy loves your praises and attention. But sometimes, he could not handle it when you and Lisa talk about guys right in front of him. 
You were out with Lisa, Jungkook, and Jungkook’s pack, having dinner at the new restaurant in town. All of you were seated around the large, round table, you being sat in between Jungkook and Lisa. Jungkook had scooted his chair to where it made your chair and his almost like a two-seater, arm around your shoulder as he had you leaned into him. You, obviously, did not mind this, finding yourself relaxed into his body. The two of you were looking at the menu together, trying to figure out what you both would want.
“I think I’ll just stick with a salad as an appetizer and have chicken alfredo as my dinner,” you concluded, looking at Jungkook.
“That sounds good baby,” Jungkook agreed with what you wanted. “I’ll take Spicy Kimchi Stew,” Jungkook concluded after a few minutes later, finalizing what he wanted right before the waiter came to the table.
Lisa kicked your leg, catching your attention. Raising her eyebrows suggestively at you when you realized that she found the waiter cute. Giggling, you nodded in confirmation, not denying the waiter was cute. But they would never beat Jungkook in attractiveness in your opinion.
Not knowing that Jungkook watched the interaction between you and Lisa, a low predatory growl rumbled in Jungkook’s chest. Tightening his arms around you, he sat up straighter in his chair and glared daggers into the waiter, nerving the poor boy.
“Jungkook.” You scolded at his rudeness when he told the boy what you two would like.
Losing his composure, Jungkook frowned down at you, “What?” He asked, trying to play innocent.
“Don’t be rude,” you said, giving Jungkook a look.
Jungkook pouted, “I’m sorry,” he apologized, wanting to get back on your good side. He hates being scolded by you.
“It’s okay, Kookie. Just go easy on the poor lad, he did no harm.”
“But you thought he was cute,” Jungkook grumbled, taking a sip of his water, jealousy evident in his tone and body language. 
Catching on to what he was saying, you giggled, finding his jealousy cute. Finding some confidence, “He has nothing on you.” A huge blush covered your face after you said that, “you have nothing to worry about.”
Jungkook was silent for a moment, body going stiff. You were nervous that you messed up, but those thoughts disappeared once you felt a pair of lips pressing to the side of your head and his arms pulling you closer (if possible) to his side, body trying to cover you with his. For the rest of the night, it felt as if you and Jungkook were on a new level. Jungkook was extra clingy and you were wanting Jungkook’s attention. You assume that your words had hit the both of you in a deeper meaning, a silent way of saying that you both belong to one another. 
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