#how do you not have a personality built around everything that has ever touched your soul ?
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maxgicalgirl · 4 months ago
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It will never fail to astound me how some people just go through life without hobbies. The fuck you mean you don’t have A Thing that you can’t go 5 minutes without thinking about ?? What do you do with your time ??
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andersonfilms · 1 month ago
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≛ LONELY IS THE MUSE!
❝ ABBY!CENTRIC ONE SHOT ❞
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feat. bodyguard!abby x famous actor!reader
warnings. eighteen+, suggestive nsfw content: reader fell first nd and abby fell harder, some angst, fluff, slightly coded fem reader, personal trainer!abby, just two idiots pining. i saw the discourse for some romance and i wanted to do my part. enjoy friends.
LONELY IS THE MUSE, entangled in an endless web of a high profile life, everyone waiting on you hand and foot, hollywood’s star in their prime — everyone needing a piece for themselves. yet the mysterious blonde who has not a clue to who you are catches the eye of the lonely muse.
wc. 8k
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“You know you don’t have to stand this close to me.” Abby counters, but her words didn’t make you move an inch. Not that she really thought they would. Secretly, she enjoys your gentle touch. She likes how comfortable you feel around her. The downpour in New York has your arm entangled with her own, your hand gripping her bicep as she holds the umbrella.
“Maybe, but I don’t want to ruin my hair.” You replied gently, as you rested your head against her relaxed bicep.
“God, forbid your hair be in ruin, sweet girl.” Abby’s wet lips look inviting, especially when she’s smirking at you. Delectable, enticing, desired seeping underneath your soul as you try your best to keep them at bay. 
“Now that would be positively tragic, wouldn’t it? Just a paparazzi’s wet dream. Need my hair in ruins for them to get a handsome payday.” Abby shakes her head, the budding smile threatening to reveal itself. You can see how it grows, despite the effort she makes to disguise it. 
“I think you do enjoy my company. Paid or not, I bring some light into your life.” You play with the ends of her hair. The blonde feels a tingle pricking at her skin. She ignores it. 
“I can see that smile.” 
Better than anyone, Abby knows the gleam in your eyes is too dangerous to entertain, so she looks forward. It’s what she's paid to do, to keep you safe. Not to entertain some weird crush that will soon pass when you move on to the next actress, artist, or producer. She doesn’t need a reminder of how different your world is, she’s already abundantly clear on where the both of you stand. Worlds apart from each other, even if you’re leaning against her, the greedy hands of the public grab onto you first, mercilessly sucking the life out of anyone who enters your life. 
All it does is isolate you, making your life incredibly lonely. Trapped on the throne you built with your raw talent, but the industry is a double edged sword, as much as it appears to lift you up, it impales any sense of normalcy at a private, peaceful life. You take pride in these little moments you have with her. It’s the only time you get to have a taste of normalcy, even if you did have a bodyguard, which wasn’t entirely normal. Yet, Abby is a gentle reminder of a life she wishes to have. Someone who is kind, and loving; a soul that exists for no selfish gain, greed, or selfishness. 
Sometimes, you take advantage of it. 
Abby knows you crave physical affection. Ever since your messy break up, you’ve been finding any little excuse to justify it. Abby didn’t really mind at all. Even if she tried to deny it in her head, she’d miss it if you stopped. The incessant need you have to be close to her at all times, your essence bleeding on to her, suffocating her with everything she wants, but knows she can’t ever let herself dip into the deepest edges of you. 
Especially, not when you are still attempting to decode the wreckage of your last relationship. 
Abby hates seeing you like this, but she knew there was little she could do to help. All she could do is let you ride the wave of heartbreak, take in the silent tears hitting full cheeks, and hope it would all end soon for you. For now, she would allow immediate proximity.
You’re hurting. You need it.  
The first few weeks, even a couple months after, she expects it. Now it’s month four, and you were still touching her all the time. Lame excuses falling from your lips daily and Abby was sure you didn’t even believe them. She thought about bringing it up to you, establishing healthy boundaries before she crosses a line.
Yet, it feels…nice.
It felt good to be needed. The reason she had taken this job in the first place. It wasn’t what she had imagined for herself – a bodyguard of a famous musician. She jokes about it now, but it's a twisted fate for the two of you. Your eyes shine bright whenever someone asks, and you always take the lead.
Abby has always been more reserved, and your personality is as bright as the sun. She liked Abby the second she laid eyes on her. Not because she was beautiful or the most gorgeous human she’d ever seen.
Which she is.
No.
Her stupid pounding heart, the one she felt beating violently out of her chest, loves you, has no idea who she is.  She had thought possibly the blonde stranger was putting on a front, some did. They liked to conceal their intentions behind greedy eyes and malicious intent.
But Abby turned out to be different.
When a blossoming friendship turned into a job opportunity, it took Abby through a loop. It was the very last thing she was expecting from you. You’d kept her in the dark and when you announced exactly who you were, Abby really didn’t know. Never was she really a fan of social media, didn’t really partake in it unless someone was showing her the latest trend going around. She’s a little old fashioned but she likes it. It worked in her favor when it came to you. Unknowingly, for the first time since your fame struck as quick as lightning, you had the pleasure to befriend someone who had no idea who you were. 
As fresh as breathing your first breath of air, you took pride in the circumstance. Someone enjoying your company for who they are and not just for your social standing, fame, or most importantly the money. Before either of you could really even fully come to it, Abby has become such an influential person in your life, and then you were attempting to entice her with a job opportunity, and she accepted. 
You thought it would take longer and knew from the moment you had asked. But her life was uprooted by you, and she felt guilty about how much it fills her up with glee. 
In the last year, Abby became the only person worthy of your trust, the only one who would keep your confessions confined, not letting the secrets drip like cheap wine down the drain. Rather more as if she was out in the vineyard, carefully hand picking the grapes for the wine as she crafts it herself. Giving it the love, care, and attention it needs to flourish into fine beverage. From one sip alone, knowing she would crave for the taste. 
Getting to know you in ways some would dream of. Often, the mass of the public did, but you’re more selective who you let in your life now. Swiftly, you noticed how easily Abby listened. 
Listening and seeing you for who you are, not some strewed version the media made you out to be.  
She understood why you felt the need to and maybe why you felt comfortable with her. You spent time with her more than anyone. After two years together, she had learned every little detail about you. Where you liked to get your morning coffee, your favorite brunch spot, which bar you like to frequent when you had a night to give, which gym was your favorite, and to not speak with you until you’ve had said coffee. 
It’s these little things Abby remembers, constantly getting her in trouble.
When paparazzi are around, you always accept her hand as she guides you through the swarming crowd. Abby knows you despise it. How inhumane it makes you feel. You feel like an attraction, an object the masses had come to see rather than being viewed as an actual person. In these moments, you cling onto Abby the most. While she’s intimidating to all, there leaves a small exception for you, never has she once been anything to you more than just a sweet, gentle giant she wants close to her at all times. 
Her stature is standing a little over six feet tall. Her arms always looked too good against the tight fabric of her shirt. The one you grip onto as she is navigating through a crowd with you in tow, she’s always focused. The remainder of your team was behind you, while she was always in front of you.
At all times, protecting you.
But it was moments like today, you were grateful for. You blended with the hectic life of the city. You were just two people waiting at a crosswalk, waiting to get to your next destination.
Abby tries not to pay too much attention to how you’re squeezing her bicep, with a strong grip further indication you weren’t letting go anytime soon.
She supposes it’s better than feeling your hand in hers. There were times when Abby deemed it necessary. She would grab it whenever she needed to get you through from point a to point b, quickly. It made you follow her pace instead of lingering behind. She didn’t even know how she was supposed to feel with your head resting against her arm, your body so close to hers.
How was she supposed to act normally?
The rumors were already getting bad. You denied them when asked, and you did gracefully each time.
All Abby could think about if this moment was captured, it would be perceived as intimate. It felt like it was, but she didn’t want the entire world to see. Not when she felt the two of you walking this very nimble line of friends, something professional, and something more. She didn’t need thousands of eyes giving their two senses in a situation she didn’t even fully understand yet. All it took was one person to snap a photo if she gets too close to you. If her touch stayed on you for too long, or if she let the love reach her eyes. The ladder was the most difficult to control. It’s a part of her just as much as the air in her lungs.
This life is new to her. At times, Abby wondered if she’s biting off more than she could chew.
The only reason she’d left was for you. She had a small, quiet life. Abby’s life was very average, a cloud of normalcy hovered above her before the two of you met. A personal trainer full time and she resided in a cabin about half an hour from where she worked. She chopped wood to relieve stress, Her girlfriend liked it at the time, and she did too. She had her two dogs, and a darling kitten. 
She enjoyed the privacy. The isolated countryside her sweet family could reside in. Abby had built this life she was proud of, and it made her happy. For a time, it worked. She was genuinely content with where she was. There wasn’t a need to stress or control where her life was going. It felt like a huge relief. She tended to live inside her own head, not be present in what she has right in front her.
It had been months since she felt like that. It’d felt good and she was proud of herself for not succumbing from within and really coming to terms with what she had built around her. This was the most difficult route for her to take. To allow herself to be open, even if there was a chance of her falling.
Abby really should have felt remorseful for leaving it all behind.
Nora was sweet. The most caring partner she ever had, but there wasn’t much she could compare it to. Besides her, there had only been two, and she didn’t even count Owen. A long misstep until she landed where she needed to be. He did care for her, and he seemed to be more kind-hearted than most men, but the bar was set so low, he should’ve exceeded expectations.
And he did, in some areas.
Others, he fell more than flat but there was little to nothing he could do about it. Abby likes girls and he wasn’t one. Her sexuality shattered their relationship into a million pieces – leaving neither of them any option but to move on.
Nora felt real. This genuine connection she’d never experienced before. Abby knew it one year into their relationship. The pair had built this life together, one where she didn’t feel trapped in, and one Abby could be proud of. She felt acknowledged and loved Nora. There wasn’t a sliver of a doubt in her mind this where she needed to be.
She tells Nora when she needs space, and she isn’t ashamed of it. If she didn’t want to go out, Nora wouldn’t guilt trip her into it. Abby didn’t feel pressured to intertwine her identity with Nora just because they were together. Nora hardly ever gave Abby a reason to be upset. She showed up like partners were supposed to, even when Abby didn’t.
But it was a heavy weight to carry for Nora. Being her first serious queer relationship, Abby was left stunted in areas where Nora had to lend a helping hand. She never made Abby feel bad about it, but the two of them could feel the string keeping them threatening to snap.
Often, it frustrated Abby. To always be the one receiving help and never giving it. She didn't blame her partner, but she was left at a crossroad. 
She never understood Owen more and it really pissed her off.
To no fucking end.
But Nora was far more patient than Abby had ever shown. Maybe it was the testament to love or maybe Nora was just a good person and Abby is shitty. She had more patience than Mother Thersea herself, and it amazed her. Always guiding Abby with a gentle hand, never getting upset with her even when she let her anger shine through.
It makes her feel undeserving of a love she could never earn.
This pure and untainted love had never touched her before, and she’d never fallen this hard. Abby didn’t want to be anywhere but here. She really thought this could be it. Nora could be the one. They could get through those hardships together, right? 
Then you came and overwhelmed her like a tsunami.
She was running late, which was completely out of the ordinary for Abby. Instead of her neat braid, her sun kissed-blonde hair was in a low bun. Underneath her eyes was evidence of her lack of sleep. She hadn’t been getting any as of lately and the bags only seemed to get deeper.
Abby wouldn’t call the fights constant, but it sure did feel like it.
The back and forth, having the same fight consistently. Abby was more than frustrated. The biggest efforts she made were dismissed by Nora, even making her upset at times. She was trying too hard and being annoying, or not doing enough and then it meant she wasn’t present in the relationship.
Abby felt her stuck at a wall, Nora on the other side of it and she couldn’t hear a damn thing.
So, she was running late.
One of the many fights  they’ve had with each other as of late. Nora is tired of dealing with a “baby gay” as she likes to remind her in the heat of their arguments. Abby gets offended, her lips forming into an even deeper pout, her porcelain skin flushed in anger before she gives them both space. 
Contemplating about the future of their relationship in the shower, causing her to be late to work in the process. 
Astronomically behind – her client arrived at the gym she worked at half an hour ago. The most recent argument with Nora plagued her morning. All they seem to do is argue, trapped in what they both need from the relationship, but all the two of them could do is argue, argue, argue.
But neither of them makes a move. They are still as the eerie silence that carries them into questioning. 
It’s when she’s too inside her head, fearing about the future, when she violently bumps into you. Body colliding with yours, Abby’s stone-like build causes you to crash into the pavement, your belongings scatter along with Abby’s. 
“Fuck. Are you alright? Sorry, I’m in such a hurry, I’m sure I wasn’t even paying attention.” You let her pick you from the ground, she does with ease. She looks right through you and you expect the excitement, the excited tears, or to be asked for a picture but it never comes.   
“For a moment I thought I ran into a wall—” You giggle to yourself. “Really, I’m alright.” You spoke softly. You pick up both of your belongings that had slipped from both of your grips, returning it to its owner. 
“Are you sure you’re okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Abby asks again. 
You think it’s cute how much lace of concern is conveyed in her cerulean eyes, full of light and wonder, so beautiful it stops you in your tracks. 
“No no! I’m fine! Really don’t worry about it.” 
Honestly, you’re still in amazement she has no idea who you are. It makes your fondness of her grow even more. The two of you depart quickly, go about your day, and you think nothing of it until you go to unlock your phone to message your manager and it’s not a picture of the moon you’d taken during the eclipse, it’s the mysteriously hot and kind woman you’d run into before. 
Shit. She has my phone. 
Lucky for you, Abby was coming to the same realization. Ready to bring out the workout she had planned out for her first client, opening her phone to access where she had written everything out only to find this isn’t her phone. Well, fuck. 
Abby hollers at Dina to take over the client for a moment, excusing herself for a moment before retreating into the office to call from her direct line. 
Idiot Anderson. Now you get to make an idiot of yourself, twice. 
Way to go. 
She calls her phone and it rings a few times before the familiar voice chimes through the speaker, the one she heard this morning during her fit of anxiety. 
“Please tell me this is the woman I ran into earlier or else I’m going to be even more embarrassed for answering a stranger's phone.” 
“Well you’re in luck.” 
“Oh thank fuck—” You curse yourself before being so vulgar with someone who you didn’t even know. “Sorry! God, this is all my fault. I must have swapped our phones when I picked them up and didn’t even realize.” 
“It’s okay, really, if I was paying attention where I was walking this morning it never would have happened. Did you wanna meet?” 
“No! Let me. Please, this is all my fault. I should at least be the one who makes the drive.” 
“Are you sure? It’s really no trouble. I don’t mind.” 
“I’m really sure.” 
Abby offers the address of work, thinking once after she does if it’s a good idea, a total stranger knowing where she works but she’s already giving the street name and suite number before she can even make her mind. Abby usually doesn’t get nervous but this situation has sent her into a frenzy, thinking about how dumb she could have been. Nora will get a good laugh out of it she thinks, then she is reminded of the fight the two of them were still in. She wonders if she’s even tried to reach out to her yet or if Nora’s just waiting until Abby’s anger rolls over. 
More favorably, the ladder. 
Until the two of them have the comfort of their lives, the cushion they have between their shared friends and the home they share twenty minutes out of the state, until it comes up again and they’ll be contemplating it all over again. Anxiously, the front desk girl, Bevs, the younger girl who has a crush on her, shyly comes up to her. 
Bevs says what she assumes is your name, confusing Abby in the process. 
“You know her?” 
“How could you not? She’s one of the most famous actresses ever.” Abby is stunned to say the least. Truthfully, she had no idea. Her lack of social media keeps her out of the loop and as much as her friends tease her about, if Abby knew who you were the first time around, she’s sure she wouldn’t have been able to say more than two words. Clearly, you’re a fresh face to her. Already, Abby knows Manny is going to have a field day when Bevs lets this information spill in her sheer excitement. 
Great, she thinks. 
“Oh.” 
“I put her in your office. Some of the clients were already starting to have questioning looks, putting the pieces together. Hey! Maybe they're as clueless as you.” 
“Bevs, go back to the front desk.” With a curt nod and realizing she has pushed too far, with a tail between her legs she retreats back to her post. 
Okay, Anderson, let’s get this over with. 
Abby smells you the minute she steps foot in her office. It’s not the usual pinewood scent the candle in her office radiates. There’s a lingering smell of lavender with just a hit of vanilla. It’s sweet as it engulfs her nostrils, she finds herself sniffling slightly, a silent beg for more of it. You’re standing the minute you’re aware of her presence. Painfully, Abby is aware of her lack of clothing. The tight sport jacket is left unopened, her black sweatpants, accompanied with her sports bra, abs on display as she watches your eyes examine her carefully. 
She’s not sure how to feel about it. 
There is a moment, a short one where your eyes go to her chest, the silver barbells constricting against the small fabric, clear as to what lies beneath. 
Abby does smirk at that. She’s only human. 
You keep staring at her for a minute longer, well it feels like one but Abby deems it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds. “Sorry to keep you waiting.” 
“It’s really not a problem.” The more time goes on, the sweeter you are. “It’s pretty close to where I live.” 
Abby didn’t know it then but you were lying straight through your teeth. The trainer didn’t know you moved around your entire day to make the phone swap or the butterflies swarming your stomach from just how attractive and nice she seemed to be. There was something about her that sent your caution flying to the wind, drifting in the leaves with the rest of your pride. 
“Well I appreciate you coming out this way, even if it’s in your area. I really wouldn’t have minded taking the drive.” Abby pulls out your phone as she hands you yours. It’s simple, transactional, and it should have just been left at that but you had a fondness of putting your foot in your mouth. 
“Are you a trainer here?” 
“Uh, yeah. Been doing it for a few years actually. I spent so much time here already, now I get paid for it. Can’t really complain.” 
“Do you ever do private sessions?” 
“Um-” Abby scratches the back of her awkwardly, not sure if you’re asking her genuinely or if you’re trying to insinuate something else entirely. 
“Oh fuck no! I didn’t mean it like that. I just have a….job opportunity I have to get in shape for and you just look like you know what you’re doing.” Abby thought you might as well point to her physique but if anything she was flattered. It was always nice knowing something she’s been working on for years, her longest standing commitment besides Nora, is appreciated. 
“Sure, we could work something out.” You slightly smile before you exchange phones, this time on purpose, to put in the other’s number. Normally, she didn’t give out her number to clients, but Abby makes an exception for you that day. To this day, she’ll never outwardly admit why she did, not even to herself. 
Two years later, she’s single from her life being turned upside down by you. The casualty being her own relationship, leaving Nora behind was one of the hardest decisions she’s made. Nora never agreed on Abby taking the job. As much as Nora wished for Abby to be more open about their endeavors, as soon as she accepted an offer that could drastically expand the trajectory of their life, Nora couldn’t be asked to compromise another thing. 
That was that. Not even two months into Abby working for you and Nora had called it quits. Abby never talked about it, only you knew she had a girlfriend she used to talk about when you began training with her, and then it was just silent. Back then, you didn’t know her well enough to pry, so you didn’t. 
Even as time passed, the two of you became friends through your employment, spending all your time with her during press season for your upcoming film, Lonely Is The Muse, together. Today was the only day you had off, even if it means Abby technically had the day off, you insisted that both of you leave the hotel and go out for the day. It's the most peace you felt during the European leg of the tour. Only one more day of dealing with your sensory issues, people in your face telling you when and where to go, or the distasteful question regarding your past public breakup instead of the work you were promoting. 
Some interviewers were kind enough to let the drama go but some wanted to get their own viral moment, waiting for you to say the wrong thing. As the industry likes to say, any publicity is good publicity. 
When you’re America's sweetheart actress of the century, such luxuries can’t be afforded. 
As your manager likes to remind you, there’s a reputation you have to protect. 
“Would you like to head back now? Long day tomorrow. Last day of interviews and then your flight leaves first thing in the morning.” 
“Did Stassie put you up to this?” 
“Maybe.” 
“I thought you were supposed to be the fun one.” 
“Mhm, your definition of fun is letting you do whatever you want.” 
“And the problem with that is?” 
All Abby can do is chuckle. 
“What do you want to do then?” Abby asks. She takes note of the sparkle in your eyes, as blinding as the sun but obtaining the serenity of the moon. “I’m all ears sweetheart.” 
It’s how the two of you end up here, a rooftop party, a friend of a friend you said. The party was lowkey, more than the typical ones you would get invited. Maybe because you weren’t in Los Angeles, Miami, or New York — but tucked away on another continent — or perhaps everyone here is just discreet. 
There’s only two fans that come up to you instead of twenty. You’re thankful for some sense of normalcy, one night where you can just feel normal. It still never gets old, people coming up to you as they confess the impact you’ve had on their life. It feels unbelievable at times but you’re grateful for the luxury life you’ve been granted. 
“Here. No liquor tonight.” Abby hands you a glass of red wine, your favorite beverage of choice when you couldn’t have tequila. 
“Yes Ma’am.” You playfully salute her. More than anything, you enjoy the not so subtle chuckle. “Not that I don’t love your company but isn’t Stassie supposed to boss me around?” 
“She felt under the weather. Plus, we both know you don’t listen to her.” 
“And I listen to you?” Your hand plays with her loose blonde hair, smoothing out the white button she’s wearing. 
“Yeah, you do. I wonder why that is.” Abby is playing with fire tonight. Possibly due to the fact that you wouldn’t leave her side, not even for a moment, keeping your body close, practically gluing yourself to her. Yes, she’s charged with keeping you safe and protected but it seems you find enjoyment bringing it to another level entirely. 
“You’re much nicer to look at, that’s all.” It’s light, a quiet whisper, not meant to be heard by anyone — not even for Abby to hear. “Don’t wanna make my handsome bodyguard upset.” 
Faking your pout as you let the words leave your lips, Abby chuckles as you get closer to her, her body standing strong as you push your weight onto her. Stoic as always, while you lean on her, she keeps her eyes peeled. Ensuring your safety at all times. 
“Flattery isn’t going to get you a shot tonight.” 
“I’m just stating the obvious.” 
Abby chuckles, again. She’s delighted you’re enjoying yourself, even if it comes at her expense. There’s a soft jazz song playing outside, couples dancing to the music, you zone out for a moment as you look upon one in particular. 
They are older, possibly in their forties, raven hair beginning to gray, fine lines crinkle when they smile at each other but it’s hard to take note of anything else but the way the couple looks at each other. Your mind wonders how long they’ve been together, if it’s been for years, months, a couple weeks. 
It doesn’t really matter. You just want that. 
The feeling isn’t lost on you, especially when you’re in the arms of the woman you love. For her, she’s being protective, doing her job but you wish it was different. A bubbling desire dripping off your tongue, a need to have her close to you but because she wants. Not because she’s paid to. 
“If I can’t have any tequila shots, god forbid, you have to dance with me.” You down the rest of your wine, placing the empty glass on the bar. “C’mon, you can give Stassie an earful later.” 
Pulling her towards the makeshift dance floor, Abby leads as your head rests against her chest. The steady, soft heartbeat soothes you, a reminder of the safety you feel with her. Caught in the riptide of her kind eyes and heart full of gold. It’s what makes her so unique, so loved, so her. With a surprisingly good tone, Abby sings to the music softly before twirling you around and spinning your body back to her. 
“Is there anything you can’t do?” Your hand rubs lovingly on her lower back as she holds you in her arms. You take pride when it doesn’t feel transactional. When she holds you and it feels as if she was meant to. There’s nothing else comparable to it, her frame melting into yours as your soul finds solace in her warm embrace. 
“There’s plenty of things.” Playfully, Abby smirks. 
“Oh yeah. I’m sure.” 
The sarcasm practically drips out of you as her smirk grows wider. 
“Can I ask you something?” You hesitate for a moment as you find her beautiful blue eyes staring into your soul. It’s only then does everything troubling might dissipate while she holds you — secretly hoping it’s forever. 
“You can ask me anything.” 
You give yourself a moment to collect your thoughts as you move to the delicate beat. “Do you ever wish for a life where you could have had a normal life? I wonder if things could be different.” 
Immediately, Abby answers. 
“Not anymore, no, not for a second.” 
If it was even possible, Abby pulls you closer to her, not urging a word more. It’s how she is, cold and distant to some but they don’t feel the stutter in her breath when you’re near or the soft pad of her thumb rubbing soothingly on the back of your hand. Or the soft words of encouragement when you’re having a difficult day. 
They hear none of it. 
She dances with you for a couple more songs, before you find solace on the couch. You lay beneath the moonlight, your body cuddles into her side as you stare up at the sky. 
It’s lost on you how you’ve ended  with her, someone as kind and untainted as her, wanting to spend her free time with you, but you’re grateful for it. Whatever god you have to thank, you’ll get on your knees to praise their alter for bringing Abby into your life. She’s the best thing to ever happen to you and she doesn’t even know it. Albeit, she hardly knows the extent of how wonderful she is. 
“Why here?” 
“It’s a good night, nice weather. Why not?” 
A question with a question. It’s the most straightforward answer you’ll ever give her. Innuendos for the sweet girl to piece together, but with the soft circles being drawn her stomach with the pad of your finger leaves little to nothing to decode. 
“It’s nice, yeah.” 
Abby always has so little to say but her mind swarms with a thousand reasons why this is a bad idea and a million of why this is where the constellations in the jaded sky have led to you. Straight into the pits of innocence, a heart that’s been hurt more times than she can count but still as golden and whole as one could be. 
“What do you think of Italy?” 
“It’s nice.” 
“Nice? That’s all I get?” 
Abby smirks but her body stills when you play with the waistband of her trousers before gliding back to the security of her abdomen, carving the liner of her defined abs. The ones she tries so hard to cover up, but you saw on the very first day you met her. 
“Do you want more?” You ask, an eyebrow raising in suggestion. Abby knows it’s a double edged sword, one she doesn’t want to be injured with. 
“You’re playing a very dangerous game.” Cautiously, Abby warns. “I’m not sure that last drink was a great idea.” 
You rest your head on her sternum, sapphire eyes looking down at you as her hand finds home on your waist, the blunt of your nails scratching softly at her stomach. 
“They always seem like a great idea at the time, don’t they?” With a gentle hand, you caress her scarred cheek, the pad of your thumb gently tenderly kissing the freckled skin. Outlining the softness of her jaw with your left, while your right one refuses to leave her stomach. 
“I don’t see how anyone would ever want to leave you.” Abby hums, not giving you much to go off of, tight lipped as she’s always been. The Nora situation has always been on your mind. One day, Abby’s speaking of her like she’s the love of her life and the next? Abby stiffens so tight when you bring up her name you promise yourself to never speak of it again. Until now, almost two years later, you’re more curious than you have ever been. The fatal ending, not belonging to you, but still you paw for the answers with your greedy palms. 
“You can just ask me if you want to know. I can see the look in your eyes.” 
“What look? I don’t have a—” 
Abby tilts your chin with your palm, leaning into her touch as you often do. 
“Yes, you do.” 
“How do you know this look?” 
“Hm.” Her thumb pulls at your bottom lip, “You’re just trying to get me in trouble now.” 
Your tone shifts, your eyes become transcendent, more crystal clear than they’d been all night. 
“What happened between you and Nora?” You ask, treading lightly on the ground you’re skating upon, in fear the ground beneath you might just crack if you apply too much pressure. 
“Why is it so important to you?” 
“It’s not that it’s—” You face plant into her chest, giving yourself a moment to breathe. Fuck, even her chest smells good. 
“You don’t ask about anything unless it’s of value to anyone. You don’t waste time, you’re very adamant about it. Painfully so.” Blonde eyebrows relax as she closes her eyes for a moment, but her touch on you soothes you. It’s gentle; a somber comfort bleeding into blissful joy. 
“But I’ve spent a lot of time with you.” 
“Yes, you’ve spent a lot of your time with me.
Abby opens her eyes to see you, your head tilted to the right, as you look upon each carve of her angelic face, the one that could only be carved by the gods above, resembling an angel on earth. As pure as the snow with the biggest heart of gold you ever have had the pleasure of knowing. 
“What?” 
“I didn’t say a thing.” You smile slyly. 
“We didn’t break up because of you, if that’s what you’re asking.” Abby sighs, “You’re not some homewrecker. My home with Nora was already wrecked before we met.” 
“Are you just saying it to make me feel better?” 
“No, I’m not.” You play with the ends of her golden hair, it hurts to be this close to what you want but knowing it’s so clearly out of your reach, league even, all of it will end the same. “Nora wasn’t fond of her being my first relationship with a woman. It caused a ripple effect, me feeling like I wasn’t good enough and her feeling like she has to carry me in the relationship, emotionally anyway.” 
“Is that why you broke up?” 
“No.” 
“It was because of me.” You state, as a matter of fact, knowing there is no other truth to be known. With tears welling up in your eyes, an ache  in your heart, one that made you ache all over. The dread of the guilt weighing heavily on your heart, time and distance still isn’t enough for you to run from it. 
“It was a job that was a great opportunity. Alright? It wasn’t you, even if I hadn’t, we both wanted different things. I didn’t even realize it until after but I wasn’t happy. I promise, it has nothing to do with you.” 
What Abby didn’t know, you needed to hear her say those words. In the back of your head, a monstrous demon unleashes in your mind, telling you crashed her relationship. You were the problem and her inevitable doom, but she’s assuring you it wasn’t the case. 
“We hardly knew each other back then.” 
As pathetic as it sounds, Abby can’t imagine her life without you. 
“Yeah hardly.” 
There’s that look again, pouring into Abby’s soul as it eats her up whole, the gleam in your eyes begging for more. It’ll complicate things if Abby gets involved, she knows this, but it already seems like she is despite her best efforts not to be. 
“Did I do good? You always say you miss stargazing with your brother back home. I know it’s not as quiet as the cabin you have, but I thought it would be okay for now.” 
“The view isn’t bad, not one bit.” She admits as she lets you rub her abdomen, the goosebumps crawling upon her skin the more Abby lets you touch her as if she’s yours to hold. “Lev would like it. I’m convinced the kid likes you more than me now.” 
“As he should. I’m pretty damn amazing.” 
“He asks too many questions though.” 
“About what?” 
“I dunno…..things.” Abby retreats back into her shell, the layer of protection she uses to protect herself from getting hurt. Most of all, out of everyone the gods could torture her to be confused about, of course it has to be you. Everyone in your life is always begging for pieces of your time, pieces of your affection and bits of your time to suck you dry. Abby has always wondered how you juggle it all. It feels cruel to even think you would put her in the mix. 
Painfully, there’s nights like tonight, where she sees the desire swarming in your eyes — every part of her pleads to give in to the temptation. Give into something she’s never even let herself think about until the last few months. As thick as drywall, there was a barrier keeping her heart from you, one she kept to protect you and herself even. 
The absolute last thing she wanted was to wreck everything this has to offer. If she makes the wrong move, all of it can come crashing down on you…it’s the last thing she wants. Make you a martyr in her story, one she thinks and dreams of often but knows you’re too big for her to exist in your life. The circles you run in don’t even exist in the same planet, the same fucking universe if Abby’s being honest. 
“What things?” You pout, your hand traveling south, caressing her thigh with a familiarity Abby wishes you didn��t have. She wishes for a lot but they never come true, that’s all you can be, a dying wish Abby curses upon a fading star.  
“It’s just stupid shit, not worth mentioning.” 
“Abby…” 
“Yeah?” 
“I—” You take a deep breath, your voice already shaky and you haven’t even told her yet. “I don’t think you even know how much you mean to me.” Abby isn’t sure where you’re going with this, terrifying her instantly. 
Have you finally had your fill of her? Were you gonna fire her? Now? 
“Lev doesn’t just talk to you about us.” 
“Us?” Nervously, Abby stomach clenches, unprepared for where this conversation is heading. 
“Why are you so scared?” 
Abby visibly and loudly gulps, almost making you giggle slightly. 
“I-I’m not.” 
The stonewall she attempts to hide behind but you won’t let her, not tonight. Slumping in the shadows, waiting for you to find someone else to love as she watches your happiness from a far, that’s what she allows herself. Nothing more and nothing less. 
“Abs, look at me.” She meets your eyes, away from the constellations in the sky, afraid if she looks for a moment too long she’ll be stuck here forever. “Talk to me, m’right here, not going anywhere unless you want me to.” 
Instantly, Abby grips your hips, keeping you in your place. 
“No, that’s not—” 
“What?” 
“I’m not what you want. I’m surely not what anyone needs. Hell, I’ve only been with one woman which is deemed to be for not being enough, right? I’m the girl who came out too late, who doesn’t have enough experience but because I’m built like some fucking adonis I need to know whatever the fuck I’m doing but I don’t. I never know what I’m doing. The only thing I know how to do is protect you, that’s all I’m good for and I’m not gonna screw that up just because I—” 
“Because what?” Your pelvis is on top of hers, your face coming closer to Abby’s, watching as you are irrevocably close to her, closer than you’ve ever been, wet lips ghosting over her pouty pink lips. Abby doesn’t even know when you moved, how you got so close, too lost in her own head to register your movements. 
“It doesn’t matter.” Abby puffs out. 
“It matters to me.” You sink into her, further, if it's even possible. “No one matters more than you, alright?” 
“But there’s people.” Abby looks for an excuse to get up, she comes up enough so she’s sitting up against the armrest of the patio couch, holding your lower back as she does so, leaving you straddling her hips. 
“I don’t care. All that matters is you.” You push a piece of blonde hair away, seeing her beautiful cheeks more clearly, her shining blue eyes finding its unique path to your heart, the one especially made for her. “Here just let me talk, alright? You don’t have to say anything. Just listen.” 
Abby is nearly crying, practically purring as you run your fingers through her cascading blonde hair. It’s too much but not enough. Although she is sure of one thing, the one thing she wants more than anything. 
“I’ve always been one for pretty girls. I had a reputation around Hollywood, always chasing one after the next, never reaching my fill or as the tabloids like to say.” You chuckled half-heartedly; the wound cutting deeper than you would have liked. “My publicist having to pay paparazzi an obscene amount of money to get these photos from ever hitting online, month after month, it was pathetic really. Just trying to fill a hole, one I didn’t even know how to fill.” 
“I didn’t know that.” 
“It’s not something I’m proud of and I never wanted you to see me differently but I’m not ashamed anymore though. I’m not that person anymore. I haven’t been since I met you.” Abby falls silent, her cheeks turning crimson before she can try to hide it “You not knowing how I was, it's just the humbling I needed. Not to mention you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen— you still are— but you had a girlfriend so I kept my feelings silent. Something just felt different with you and then you were single and I was afraid of you.” 
“Why?” 
“Because I didn’t want to ruin you so I made a promise to myself. I would never start anything with you, not unless I was in love with you.” 
“You love me?” 
“It’s impossible not to.” You sigh into her, forehead pressed against hers, her strong hold not letting go. “You don’t have to say anything or do anything. I don’t expect anything in return. I just can’t live in a world where you think because you’re not experienced as some, you think you’re less than people who are.” 
“It’s true, I’m not there with everyone else and it shows.” 
“Abby, you’re not getting it.” 
“Well, no shit. I’m not good enough for any of this, you especially.” 
“It’s not…” You bite your lip as you reach for her hands on your waist, intertwining them with your own. “Abs, it would’ve saved me a lot of trouble.” Your lips ghost over her lips again, but this time Abby inches closer, her breath warm as it hits your mouth. 
“What?” 
“If I was a patient person and waited for you.” 
More than before, Abby’s breath is heavy as the rise and fall of her chest is rapid, trying to calm herself down but it’s impossible when you’re this close. It’s a lot for her, maybe she’s overly sensitive, but your touch is practically lighting her on fire. Abby wonders if it will ever be able to be put out or if your magnetic touch will leave her scorned. 
Puppy eyes inwardly pleading for an ounce of your touch, so sweet as she supports your weight with her strong thighs, anchoring you to her — never quite letting go. A single glance detrimental to the layer of protection she built around herself. 
“There’s no more waiting, m’right here.” Abby closes the gap indefinitely, lips connecting with yours as they move in perfect harmony, as if this is what she was made for. Involuntarily, she whimpers in your mouth as you gently tug at her bottom nibble at her bottom lip, your tongue sliding in as it dominates her own. It happens too quickly — the way her very being melts into you. 
Like honey to a bee, there’s nothing that’s ever been so sweet. 
This is all you need. 
“Abby?” 
“Yeah, angel?” 
“Let’s get out of here.”
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novaursa · 2 months ago
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The Broken Crown (2/2)
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- Summary: Aegon the Conqueror's youngest sister, Y/N Targaryen, once bethrohed to Torrhen Stark, is forced into a marriage with her brother after he calls off her engagement out of jealousy. Struggling with her lost future and the life she never wanted, she repeatedly refuses Aegon's attempts to consummate the marriage. When she tries to escape to Essos on her dragon, Visenya intercepts her, and Aegon, in an act of control, chains her dragon to prevent any further rebellion, leaving her feeling trapped and broken.
- Paring: sister!reader/Aegon I Targaryen
- Rating: Explicit 18+ (just to be safe)
- Previous part: 1
- Word count: 9 900+
- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @alyssa-dayne @oxymakestheworldgoround @fiction-fanfic-reader @fireandblood-mharmie @poisonedsultana
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The light of late afternoon spills into your chambers at Aegonfort. The fire in the hearth crackles quietly, but the warmth it offers feels distant, barely touching the chill that has settled deep within you. You sit by the window, staring out at the courtyard below, where the life of the castle continues as if nothing has changed.
But everything has changed.
It has been weeks since Tesaerix’s cries were last heard, her roars of frustration and anguish fading into silence, replaced by the eerie stillness of acceptance. Chained to the ground, her spirit broken, she no longer fights against her captivity. And yet, the anguish that grips your heart is as strong as ever, a constant, gnawing presence that refuses to loosen its hold. It is as if a part of you has been chained alongside her, and no matter how many days pass, the weight does not lift.
The door creaks open behind you, but you do not turn. You know who it is—there is only one person who would come to your chambers unannounced.
Aegon steps inside, his presence filling the room, though he lingers by the door, as if uncertain of his welcome. You hear the soft sound of his boots against the stone floor as he moves closer, and still, you do not turn to face him. Your eyes remain on the distant horizon, though your mind is far away, lost in the echo of memories and dreams that will never come to pass.
"Y/N," he says quietly, his voice cautious, as if he fears your reaction. "Your nameday is approaching. I’ve arranged a celebration in your honor."
His words hang in the air, but they barely register. A grand celebration—another event meant to remind you of your place, of the crown that sits on your head like a lead weight. It is as though he believes that feasts and dances, the laughter of courtiers, and the lavish display of power might somehow ease the pain that lingers in your heart.
You force a smile, though it does not reach your eyes, and nod slightly. "Thank you," you murmur, your voice distant, detached. "It is kind of you."
Silence falls between you, heavy and suffocating. You can feel his gaze on you, searching for something—some sign that you might be softening, that the wall you have built around yourself might be cracking. But it remains firmly in place, unyielding.
Aegon takes a step closer, but his movements are slow, hesitant. He is not the same conqueror in this room, not the king who has united the Seven Kingdoms. Here, in your presence, he seems uncertain, unsure of himself. His hands hang at his sides, restless as if he doesn’t know what to do with them.
"I wanted it to be special for you," he says, his voice quieter now. "Everything I’ve done… it’s been for you."
You finally turn your gaze away from the window, meeting his eyes for the first time since he entered the room. His expression is conflicted—his usual mask of authority replaced by something more vulnerable, more human. It is a rare thing to see Aegon uncertain, and for a moment, you almost feel a flicker of sympathy for him. Almost.
But the weight of what has happened between you, the chains that bind not only Tesaerix but also your spirit, is too heavy. The wounds are still fresh, too deep to be soothed by soft words or grand gestures.
"Special," you echo, the word tasting hollow on your tongue. "I see."
He opens his mouth to say something more, but no words come. Instead, he stands there, a man lost in the silence of his own making. You can see the hope in his eyes, the faint flicker of desire that perhaps you will change your mind—that you will ask him to stay, to be by your side, to share in some moment of closeness that has long been absent between you.
But you don’t. The invitation he silently waits for never comes.
You turn your gaze back to the window, the sky outside darkening as the sun sinks lower, casting the world in shades of gold and shadow. Your heart remains cold, your soul untouched by his presence. Whatever he is waiting for, you cannot give it to him. Not anymore.
Aegon lingers for another long moment, the silence between you stretching until it feels almost unbearable. And then, finally, he steps back, his movements slow and reluctant, as though each step away from you is a struggle. He pauses at the threshold, turning back one last time, as if hoping that you will stop him, that you will call him back.
But you say nothing. Your silence is its own answer.
Without another word, he leaves, the door closing softly behind him, the sound barely a whisper in the quiet room.
You are left alone once more, the distant hum of the castle’s life continuing outside, but it feels far removed from your own. You sit in the stillness, the ache in your chest as sharp as ever, the weight of the world pressing down on you as you stare into the darkening sky, wondering when—if ever—this feeling will fade.
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The sound of trumpets fills the air, their bright, brassy notes cutting through the din of the crowd gathered in the tournament grounds outside Aegonfort. Banners snap in the wind, the vibrant colors of the Targaryen sigil—red and black—mingling with your own, the gold and crimson of the standard Aegon created for you. The noise of the people is a constant hum, their excitement visible as they gather for the grand tourney, held in honor of your nameday.
You sit in the royal seat, placed high above the jousting field on a raised platform. The elaborate wooden structure is draped with silks and banners, casting an air of regality over the event. The weight of the eyes below is heavy on you, but your expression remains composed, practiced. This is your moment, after all, though it feels more like a display of duty than celebration.
Your gown gleams in the midday sun, the fabric shimmering with every movement. It is a deep red, the color of blood and fire, with gold embroidery swirling around the hem and sleeves, symbolizing the flames of your house. The rich silk clings to your form, the neckline modest but elegant, the material flowing down your figure in a cascade of crimson and gold. Around your waist is a finely braided belt, studded with small rubies that catch the light, drawing attention to the dragon motif woven into the threads.
Aegon had made sure you were dressed in the colors of the banner he gave you, a reminder that you are his queen—separate yet still bound by his will. The crown he gifted you, delicate but unmistakably regal, rests atop your head. It is a circlet of pale gold, with small crimson stones set into it, matching the colors of your banner. It feels heavy, a constant weight that you have yet to grow accustomed to, a symbol of a power you never sought.
Your hair, long and shining like polished silver, is braided intricately, the locks woven into a style fitting your station, adorned with golden pins that glitter in the light. A single lock has been left loose, curling over your shoulder, a softer touch against the formal stiffness of your attire.
Beside you sits Aegon, his violet eyes ever watchful, always keenly aware of your presence. He wears his usual armor, dark and imposing, trimmed with gold and red. You can feel his pride radiating off him like heat from dragonfire. His gaze lingers on you for a moment too long, as if to ensure you have not only embraced your role as his queen but that you look the part. The crown, the colors, the throne at his side—everything has been chosen with care.
"Do you not think she is radiant?" Aegon remarks to no one in particular, his voice carrying over the din, but his words are meant for the crowd. His smile is tight, meant to dazzle, but you know him well enough to see the strain behind it. You nod politely, offering a small smile in return, though it does not reach your eyes.
On Aegon’s other side sit Visenya and Rhaenys, both dressed in their own regal attire. Visenya, severe and cold as ever, wears black, her armor gleaming beneath her cloak, a silent reminder that she is the sword of your family. Rhaenys, in contrast, is draped in lighter colors, her violet eyes warm and playful, though even her smile seems dimmed by the undercurrents that swirl through the family.
The crowd roars as the herald steps forward, raising his hands to signal the start of the tournament. The cheers grow louder, echoing across the field as knights in shining armor ride out, their horses snorting and pawing at the ground, eager for the competition. The joust is about to begin, a display of power, skill, and loyalty—all in your honor.
Aegon rises from his seat, his imposing figure drawing the attention of everyone present. His armor clinks softly as he moves, and he raises his hand, signaling for silence. The crowd quiets almost instantly, all eyes on the Conqueror.
"In honor of my queen," he begins, his voice strong, carrying over the vast sea of spectators, "we celebrate her nameday with a display of the finest knights in the realm. Let this tourney show our strength, our unity, and our devotion." He pauses, glancing down at you, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "But before the joust begins, I wish to honor her in another way."
The murmurs from the crowd grow louder as Aegon steps down from his platform, making his way to his waiting horse. His squire rushes to his side, handing him his helmet, the dragon sigil gleaming in the sunlight. He mounts the large, black stallion with practiced ease, turning to face the royal stand.
"I will compete in this joust," Aegon announces, his voice filled with confidence, "in honor of my queen, Y/N, who has graced us with her beauty, strength, and loyalty."
Your heart clenches at the words. His declaration, his participation in the tournament, is all for show—a grand gesture to prove his devotion to you. Yet all you feel is the tightening grip of duty around your chest. The crowd erupts in cheers, and you force another smile, nodding at him as though this is exactly what you wanted.
Aegon’s gaze remains fixed on you for a moment longer, as if waiting for something more—perhaps a sign of approval, an invitation for him to return to your side after his victory. But the emptiness within you, the lingering ache that no crown or grand display can mend, keeps you silent. Your smile falters slightly, but still, you say nothing.
The crowd’s cheers continue as Aegon turns his horse toward the jousting lanes, ready to prove his prowess on the field. As he rides away, the space beside you feels colder, and the weight of the crown on your head presses down harder than ever.
...
The thundering hooves of horses echo across the field as the first knights prepare for the joust. Banners ripple in the wind, bright colors dancing against the azure sky as the crowd cheers, eager for the spectacle. You sit in your royal seat, your hands folded in your lap, eyes drifting over the tournament grounds. Lances gleam in the sunlight, and the clinking of armor fills the air as the first challengers ready themselves at the end of the lists.
But your thoughts are far from the cheers and excitement of the crowd. The weight of your crown feels suffocating, and your gaze strays, not to the knights or the lances, but to the far-off silhouette of Tesaerix. Chained, grounded, a shadow of her former glory. From this distance, you can barely make out the flicker of her golden and crimson scales in the sunlight, but you know she is there, tethered to the earth as you are tethered to your fate.
Rhaenys leans toward you, her voice soft as she attempts to draw you back into the present. "It’s quite the sight, isn’t it?" she says, her tone gentle, almost coaxing. "These knights would give anything for a chance to win favor from the queen of the day."
You nod politely, but your smile is forced, your mind not on the tournament or the gallant knights. Rhaenys, ever perceptive, catches your distraction, her brows furrowing slightly. "You seem distant, Y/N," she murmurs, her voice laced with concern. "Is something troubling you?"
Your response dies in your throat as your gaze flickers back to the horizon where your dragon is held captive. The ache in your chest deepens, a quiet fury simmering beneath your outward calm. "Tesaerix," you finally whisper, your voice soft but heavy with meaning. "I cannot stop thinking of her, chained there while we celebrate."
Rhaenys follows your gaze and falls silent, perhaps sensing the gravity of your pain, but before she can respond, Visenya, ever sharp and vigilant, leans forward from her place beside Aegon. Her voice is cold, a warning cloaked in authority. "Do not even entertain the thought, Y/N," she says, her violet eyes narrowing as they lock onto yours. "You will not free her, nor will you make a spectacle of defiance here."
Your blood runs hot at her words, and you turn to face her, your gaze hardening. "And what would you do, Visenya, if Vhagar were bound in chains?" you ask, your voice low, the words slipping out before you can stop them. "Do you think you would sit there so calmly if she were made to suffer like Tesaerix? I would see her miserable as you’ve made my dragon."
The insult hangs in the air like a sharp blade. For a moment, the tension between you and Visenya is palpable, her lips pressing into a thin, dangerous line as she regards you with something between anger and cold resolve. Her hand twitches as if she might grip the hilt of the sword always at her side, her eyes flashing with a silent warning.
But before she can retort, the rumble of hooves draws your attention to the lists. Aegon rides forward on his black steed, his armor glinting in the sun like dark steel, his helm adorned with the sigil of the dragon. The sight of him, proud and commanding, steals the air from your lungs, if only for a moment. The crowd erupts into cheers as the king takes his place for his first tilt.
Aegon rides past the royal stand, his eyes catching yours for a brief second. There is something unreadable in his gaze—pride, perhaps, or a plea for recognition—but you do not hold it for long. He wheels his horse around and lowers his lance, ready to compete, the first challenger already in position across the field.
You shift uncomfortably in your seat, the pressure between you and Visenya still lingering, but your eyes are now fixed on Aegon. His horse stamps impatiently, nostrils flaring as it waits for the signal to charge. You cannot help but feel the weight of what this moment represents. He is not just jousting for sport; he is jousting for you, for your approval, though you find it difficult to offer anything more than cold indifference.
The herald raises his flag, and the trumpets blare again. Aegon spurs his horse forward, charging down the lists with deadly precision. The opposing knight, though skilled, seems small compared to your brother’s imposing presence. The ground trembles beneath the weight of their charge, the clattering of armor and hooves filling the air.
Aegon’s lance strikes true, shattering against the other knight’s shield with a thunderous crack, sending his opponent crashing to the ground in a cloud of dust. The crowd roars its approval, but the sound washes over you, distant and hollow.
He circles back, his horse kicking up dirt as he passes you again, his gaze seeking yours once more, waiting for your reaction. But all you can think of is Tesaerix, grounded and silent, far from this spectacle. The chains that bind her feel like chains around your own heart, and no matter how grand this celebration, no matter how skilled Aegon is in his displays of strength, it does nothing to free you from the cage you find yourself in.
You offer Aegon a small nod, nothing more, and he rides on, returning to the field for his next challenge. The cheers rise again, but in the quiet of your mind, there is only the sound of chains, rattling against the earth.
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The Great Hall of Aegonfort is alive with light and sound, the towering stone walls adorned with tapestries depicting the dragons of House Targaryen. Tables laden with rich foods—roast meats, fruits, and fine breads—stretch the length of the hall, and the clatter of goblets and the murmur of excited conversation fill the air. Musicians play in one corner, their tunes light and festive, attempting to match the celebratory mood of the evening.
At the center of it all sits Aegon, victorious from the day’s tourney, his head held high and a satisfied smile playing at his lips. He now wears a simple crown of dark iron, his armor exchanged for a fine tunic of black and red, the sigil of the three-headed dragon emblazoned proudly on his chest. His eyes, however, are on you.
You sit beside him at the high table, still adorned in your colors of gold and crimson, though the joy of the evening seems lost on you. Despite the merriment around you, a tight knot of frustration coils in your chest, one that has only grown since the tourney’s end.
The feast is in full swing, and yet the animosity between you and Aegon is seen by all around you. He notices your coldness, the way your gaze barely meets his, and the way you’ve hardly touched your food. You’re an island of silence in a sea of celebration, and the strain between you grows more obvious with every passing moment.
Aegon turns to you, leaning in slightly, his voice low so as not to draw attention from those around you. "Is something wrong, Y/N?" His words are careful, but there is a slight edge to them, a hint of irritation beneath his outward concern.
You finally turn to look at him, your expression tight. "Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?" you say, your tone sharper than you intended. "Why would the King of Westeros compete in his own tourney?"
His brow furrows, clearly taken aback by your criticism. "It was in your honor," he replies, his voice firm but measured. "I wanted to show—"
"You wanted to show off, Aegon," you interrupt, your voice quiet but biting. "You’ve already conquered Westeros. Must you also conquer a tournament that was meant to be a gift to me?"
He blinks, clearly not expecting such a reaction. "I was honoring you. Showing the realm your importance, your—"
"No," you cut in, your gaze hardening. "You were showing the realm your power. You didn’t let the knights fight for glory or honor. You took that from them, just as you’ve taken everything else. It wasn’t fair to them."
The tension between you sharpens, and the warmth of the hall seems to dim, at least in the space between the two of you. Aegon’s jaw tightens, his fingers drumming against the table as he processes your words. "You think I should’ve let them win," he says, disbelief lacing his tone. "As if they deserved it more than me."
You lean in slightly, keeping your voice low, though your frustration is clear. "Yes, Aegon, I think you should’ve let them win. You already have the Seven Kingdoms. Why take this from them too? The knights came here hoping for glory, for a chance to win your favor—or mine. But they were never going to, not with you in the lists. They had no chance."
Aegon’s gaze darkens, his fingers stopping their rhythmic drumming. "You wanted me to lose," he says, his voice soft but dangerous.
"It’s not about losing," you reply, struggling to keep your voice steady as the simmering anger within you rises. "It’s about fairness. What was the point of them competing if the outcome was already decided the moment you took the field?"
Aegon’s expression grows colder, his pride clearly stung. "I did this for you, Y/N," he says, his voice harder now. "For you."
"And that’s precisely the problem," you say, your voice trembling slightly, not with fear but with the weight of everything unsaid. "You think everything you do is a gift to me, but you never ask me what I want. You never stop to think about what I might need."
Aegon’s eyes narrow, and for a moment, the weight of his gaze is unbearable, like staring into dragonfire. He takes a slow breath, clearly trying to rein in his temper. "What would you have me do, then?" he asks, his voice dangerously quiet. "Step aside? Watch others take what I’ve built?"
You stare back at him, unflinching. "What you’ve built is already yours, Aegon. You don’t need to prove it to anyone. But maybe... maybe you could let someone else have a moment. Just once."
Aegon’s face tightens, his frustration clear, but he says nothing. His silence feels heavy, pressing down on you both like a smothering weight. The noise of the feast around you continues, but it feels distant, almost hollow, as if you are both cut off from the rest of the hall.
Finally, after a long, tense moment, Aegon rises from the table, drawing the attention of those around you. His expression is unreadable, his eyes hard as they sweep over the hall. "I need air," he mutters, his voice clipped. Without waiting for a response, he strides out of the hall, his departure swift and silent, but leaving a wave of discomfort in his wake.
The guests glance in your direction, curious whispers rippling through the crowd. You sit there, your hands gripping the edge of the table, your heart pounding in your chest as you watch him leave. The weight of your words lingers, hanging in the air between you, but now he is gone, and you are left with the aftermath of your confrontation.
Rhaenys, ever perceptive, leans in slightly, her voice soft as she tries to ease the tension. "You speak the truth, Y/N," she says, her tone gentle but understanding. "But Aegon... He is not one who takes criticism easily."
"I know," you murmur, your voice distant as you stare at the empty space where Aegon once sat. "But someone has to tell him."
Visenya, sitting quietly at the far end of the table, glances at you but says nothing, her expression unreadable. She has always been loyal to Aegon above all else, and though she may agree with you in silence, she would never speak it aloud.
The feast continues, but for you, the victory Aegon claimed in your name feels hollow, like everything else he’s given you—a gift wrapped in chains.
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Aegon pushes through the grand doors of the hall, his movements sharp and purposeful, though inside, his heart is a storm. The warmth and noise of the feast fade into the background as he steps into the cool night air, the silence wrapping around him like a cloak. The torches lining the walls cast flickering specters across the stone courtyard, but Aegon hardly notices. His thoughts are too loud, too chaotic, drowning out everything else.
Servants and lords alike part in his path, their eyes darting nervously away as he strides through the corridors of Aegonfort, his jaw clenched, his fists tight at his sides. They sense his anger, his turmoil, and none dare to stand in his way. Even the guards lower their gazes, unwilling to meet the eyes of the king when he is like this—when the Conqueror wears his crown of fire.
Aegon’s mind races, replaying the confrontation with you over and over again. Your words had cut him deeper than any lance could. He had wanted to honor you, to show the realm your importance, but instead, you had seen only pride, only selfishness. He had fought for you, but all you had seen was a king who took what he wanted, again and again.
He walks with no clear destination, but his feet carry him toward the outer edge of the fortress, where the dragons are kept. It is instinct, perhaps, that draws him there—a need to be near the creatures that have always been his strength, his power. Yet as he approaches the dragon stables, a familiar sight meets his eyes outside them, one that still stirs unease in his chest.
Tesaerix.
The dragon lies chained to the ground, her once-majestic wings folded tightly against her body, her neck bound with heavy iron links that glint in the torchlight. Her deep crimson eyes, fierce and sharp, stare directly at him as he approaches, burning with a silent accusation.
Aegon stops a few paces away, his breath hitching as their gazes lock. Tesaerix does not roar or thrash as she once did when first bound—there is only a quiet, simmering fury in the way she looks at him now. The fire in her eyes, though dimmed, is far from extinguished.
He stands there for a long moment, staring at the dragon, the creature that had been bound because of you. Because of what you had tried to do. And now, here she lies—chained, just as you were, in a way, trapped by decisions neither of you had wanted.
"She hates me," Aegon mutters aloud, his voice barely above a whisper. It is not a question. He can see the loathing in the dragon’s gaze, the way her chest rises and falls with each slow, measured breath, as if restraining the full force of her anger. It is a mirror of the feelings he senses in you every time you look at him now.
He takes a step closer, though the chains rattling softly in the wind serve as a stark reminder of the distance between him and the creature. He should feel satisfaction at seeing Tesaerix subdued, knowing that she cannot be used against him again, that you cannot take her and flee to the ends of the earth. But instead, standing before her now, he feels... hollow.
The dragon’s crimson eyes bore into him, and for a fleeting moment, Aegon wonders if she knows what you feel, if she shares in the same grief and fury. Tesaerix has been chained, grounded—stripped of her freedom just as you have been. And now, here he stands, the man responsible for it all.
"You aren’t the only one who hates me," Aegon says bitterly, his voice hoarse. "She hates me too." He rubs a hand across his face, wiping away the tension etched there, though it does nothing to ease the storm in his chest.
Tesaerix lets out a low, rumbling sound, not quite a growl, but enough to make Aegon take another step back. The dragon shifts slightly, her chains clinking with the movement, and her eyes narrow as if daring him to come any closer. She does not trust him, not after what he has done. Just like you.
"I did what I had to," Aegon mutters, his voice quieter now, as if trying to convince himself as much as the dragon. "She would have left. Left me."
But the words feel empty, even to him. He had acted out of fear, out of a need to control what he could not bear to lose. But now, standing here before the chained dragon, watching her watch him with those blood-red eyes, he wonders if he has only made things worse—if the cost of keeping you with him has been too high.
The night air grows colder, but Aegon doesn’t move. He stands there, rooted in place, staring at the dragon who will never be free, who will never forgive him. The silence between them is thick, broken only by the occasional snap of the chains as Tesaerix shifts her weight.
Aegon exhales slowly, the weight of everything pressing down on him. He has won Westeros, but what has he truly gained? A kingdom at his feet, yet the one thing he wanted—your love, your acceptance—remains out of reach.
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The sky above Aegonfort is a pale blue, streaked with thin clouds that drift lazily in the wind. Below, in the courtyard, the dragons are being readied for flight, their massive forms casting long shadows over the stone. Balerion, Vhagar, and Meraxes stand tall, their wings rustling, eager for the skies. Aegon, Visenya, and Rhaenys are already mounting their dragons, their expressions focused, their movements practiced and sure.
You stand back, lingering near the edge of the courtyard, your eyes fixed on Tesaerix. She rests at the far end, still chained to the ground, though her posture seems less resigned today. There’s a spark of anticipation in her deep red eyes, a flicker of life you haven't seen in weeks. As your siblings prepare for their flight, you hesitate, your heart heavy as you approach her.
Tesaerix watches you with a quiet intensity as you draw near, her cream-and-crimson scales gleaming in the morning light. The iron chains that bind her wings and limbs seem smaller than they once did, though the weight of them still hangs heavily on her. You place your hand gently on her snout, your fingers brushing the warm, smooth surface of her scales. She rumbles softly, a deep, thrumming sound that reverberates through the ground beneath you. It’s a sound of recognition, of trust, and your heart clenches painfully at the thought of her continued imprisonment.
"I’m sorry," you whisper, pressing your forehead to her head, the words thick with guilt. "I failed you."
Tesaerix shifts beneath your touch, her tail curling slightly, as if she’s trying to reassure you in her own way. The warmth of her breath on your skin, the way she leans into your hand—it’s a small comfort, but it’s not enough to ease the ache in your chest.
The sound of heavy wings beating the air pulls your attention away, and you glance toward your siblings. Aegon is already on Balerion, the Black Dread shifting impatiently, ready to take to the skies. Rhaenys sits astride Meraxes, her face calm, her dark hair lifting in the breeze. Visenya, cold and commanding as always, mounts Vhagar with the ease of someone who has done this a thousand times before.
But it is Visenya who surprises you.
Just as you think she will signal for the dragons to take off, she turns her head, her sharp violet eyes locking onto you and Tesaerix. Her expression is hard to read, as always, but there’s something different in her gaze today—something that isn’t purely cold calculation.
"Tesaerix will be unchained," Visenya says, her voice carrying across the courtyard, firm but not cruel. You blink, stunned, as her words sink in. "She will be allowed to fly."
You stare at her, hardly believing what you’ve heard. For a moment, you think you’ve misunderstood, but Visenya’s gaze does not waver. She looks at you as if she knows exactly what you’re thinking, as if she has anticipated every protest, every question.
"Dragons are not meant to be grounded," Visenya continues, her tone clipped, as though stating an obvious fact. "If she remains chained, she will wither. Grow weak. That is not something we can afford."
Her words are logical, practical, but you can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to it. You meet her gaze, searching for any sign of softness, of understanding. There is none—only the cold, unyielding presence of the warrior who has always put duty above all else.
Still, the relief you feel is undeniable.
"She… she will fly again?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper, as if speaking it aloud might break the fragile possibility of freedom.
"Yes," Visenya replies simply, already turning her attention back to Vhagar. "For now."
The weight in your chest loosens slightly, and you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. You turn back to Tesaerix, your fingers brushing along her snout once more, your heart swelling with the thought of her finally being free from the chains that have held her for so long. She seems to sense it, the change in the air, and her body shifts eagerly beneath the heavy chains.
"Thank you," you whisper again, but this time, the words are not for her alone.
Aegon, having overheard the exchange, looks at you from atop Balerion, his expression unreadable. For once, he says nothing, perhaps choosing not to interfere in this moment. The three of you have been at odds for so long, the air thick with unspoken grievances, but for now, he holds his tongue.
The chains are unlatched, the heavy iron falling away from Tesaerix’s limbs and wings, the sound of it loud in the quiet courtyard. For the first time in weeks, she stretches her wings fully, the golden and crimson membrane catching the light, glimmering like blood and flame. She lets out a deep, triumphant roar, her voice rising above the fortress walls, echoing across the land.
You smile—an involuntary, fleeting thing—watching as Tesaerix shakes off the last remnants of her confinement. She looks at you, and for a moment, there is a connection between you both, something pure and powerful, something that reminds you that you are not as alone as you have felt.
Aegon signals for the flight to begin, his hand lifting in a silent command. Balerion takes to the skies with a powerful sweep of his wings, followed closely by Meraxes and Vhagar. You watch them ascend, their forms growing smaller as they soar higher into the sky.
You mount Tesaerix, feeling the familiar warmth of her beneath you. With a single word, she launches herself into the air, her wings slicing through the sky, unbound, free. The wind rushes past you, lifting your hair, filling your lungs with the crisp air of the open sky.
For the first time in weeks, you feel a sense of freedom—not just for your dragon, but for yourself.
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The sky is darkening as the four of you descend from the clouds, the distant glow of the setting sun casting the horizon in hues of gold and violet. The air is cooler now, and the wind that once rushed past you in exhilarating gusts begins to calm as your dragons lower themselves back toward the ground. Tesaerix lands gracefully, her wings beating only a few times before she touches down, her massive form folding into the familiar courtyard. The echo of her powerful roar, given just before your descent, still lingers in the air.
Vhagar and Meraxes land nearby, their massive bodies kicking up dust and loose stone as they settle. Visenya and Rhaenys dismount smoothly, their faces impassive as they slide from their dragons' backs and make their way toward the entrance of the fortress. They exchange a few quiet words between them, their long cloaks trailing behind as they move inside. There is an ease in their movements, a sense of routine and familiarity. They have done this countless times before, and tonight is no different.
But Aegon lingers.
He remains mounted on Balerion, watching as you dismount from Tesaerix, your fingers brushing the dragon’s warm hide before you step away. Her wings shift slightly, and she lets out a contented huff, clearly enjoying her brief return to the skies. Your connection with her, after all the time apart, feels more solid than it has in weeks. The bond between dragon and rider, though strained, has never fully broken. And now, as you stand beside her, it feels as though some part of you is healing.
Aegon watches from a distance, his expression unreadable. The towering figure of Balerion stands still behind him, the great dragon’s eyes half-closed as if bored by the day’s events. But Aegon’s attention is fixed on you. His gaze follows your movements as you move closer to Tesaerix’s snout, resting your hand on her once more. The quiet affection between you and the dragon is unmistakable, and for a moment, Aegon looks as though he is wrestling with something—an emotion he cannot quite name.
He dismounts slowly, his armored boots hitting the ground with a dull thud. As he steps forward, he does not call out to you, nor does he try to interrupt your moment with your dragon. Instead, he simply watches, his usual confidence replaced by something quieter, more introspective. There’s a chasm between you, but it feels different tonight—less heated, less full of the bitterness that has tainted so many of your recent interactions.
You sense his presence before you hear him, your head lifting slightly as Tesaerix rumbles softly, her large eyes flickering in Aegon’s direction. She is calm now, her anger toward him seemingly subdued after the freedom of flight. But you can feel the unspoken tension in the air as your brother approaches, the weight of the past weeks hanging between you.
“You’re staying behind?” you ask, your voice low but without the usual bite. There’s no accusation in your tone, just curiosity.
Aegon stops a few paces away, his hands resting at his sides, fingers brushing the leather of his gloves. He looks at Tesaerix for a moment before his eyes return to you. “I wanted to see how she fared,” he says, his voice measured, quieter than usual. “After being chained for so long.”
You glance at him, searching his face for any sign of insincerity. But for once, Aegon doesn’t seem to be playing the king, the conqueror. His words feel honest, unvarnished. His gaze shifts to Tesaerix, who meets his eyes for a brief moment before turning her attention back to you, her focus unshaken by the presence of the man who once imprisoned her.
“She’s strong,” you reply, your voice soft. “Stronger than I gave her credit for.”
Aegon nods, his eyes lingering on Tesaerix’s folded wings, the glow of her golden scales dimming with the falling night. “Dragons aren’t meant to be chained,” he says quietly, more to himself than to you. His words carry a weight that you know isn’t just about Tesaerix. He’s speaking of more than dragons now.
You feel something unspoken between you both—he knows what he did was wrong, but admitting it outright is something Aegon rarely does. Still, this moment feels different. It’s not an apology, but it’s close enough.
You look away from him, your gaze returning to Tesaerix, who lets out a soft rumble as you run your hand along her snout once more. “She missed the skies,” you murmur. “Just like I did.”
The silence stretches between you, thick but not uncomfortable. For the first time in weeks, Aegon seems unsure of himself, as if he doesn’t know how to breach the distance between you, even as he stands only a few feet away. He opens his mouth as if to speak, but the words falter before they leave his lips.
You can feel him hesitating, lingering on the edge of something unsaid. Finally, he steps forward, his gaze softening as he watches you with Tesaerix. “I wanted to give you something today,” he says, his voice low. “I thought… I thought letting her fly would show you that I’m trying.”
You pause, turning your head slightly to look at him, the surprise evident in your eyes. It isn’t like Aegon to admit such things. He’s always been the conqueror, the king who takes what he wants. Vulnerability isn’t something you’ve come to expect from him.
“She deserves to be free,” you reply, your tone neutral, though a flicker of something warmer slips into your words. “As do we all.”
Aegon looks at you, his gaze searching, but whatever he’s hoping to find, he doesn’t ask for. He nods, a brief but telling gesture. “Perhaps,” he murmurs, though his tone suggests that freedom is a concept he still struggles with.
For a long moment, neither of you speaks. The only sound is the distant murmur of the wind and the occasional rustle of Tesaerix’s wings. Finally, Aegon takes a step back, turning his gaze toward the fortress. “We’ll be flying again in the morning,” he says, though his voice lacks the command it usually holds.
“I know,” you reply softly.
He looks at you one last time, as if he wants to say more but knows there are no easy words for what lies between you. Then, with a final nod, he turns and walks away, his footsteps echoing against the stone as he disappears into the shadows of the fortress.
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The days have grown quieter in the weeks since Tesaerix was freed from her chains, and the anger that once filled the air between you and Aegon has begun to ease, though the distance between your hearts remains vast. The nights are cooler now, the winds carrying the scent of the sea as they sweep through the towers of Aegonfort. The sound of dragons is ever-present, their cries echoing through the stone walls, a reminder of the power your family holds.
You stand by the fire in your chambers, staring into the flames as they flicker and dance. Your thoughts drift, as they often do, to the life you could have had. Winterfell, the snow-covered plains of the North, and Torrhen Stark’s quiet strength. The ache is still there, a dull, constant pain that you have grown accustomed to, though it never truly fades.
A soft knock at the door pulls you from your thoughts, and you turn, already knowing who it is before you see him. Aegon steps into the room, his movements slow and unhurried, his gaze settling on you with a strange mix of determination and hesitation. He has been visiting you more often as of late, his presence less forceful, less commanding than it once was. He no longer brings gifts or demands anything from you, but simply... comes.
“You’ve been quiet tonight,” he says, closing the door behind him, his voice low and cautious. He’s always careful now, as if each word could set off an unseen tremor between you both.
“I’ve had much on my mind,” you reply, turning back to the fire, though you know he can read the truth in your silence.
He crosses the room and stands beside you, the warmth of the fire washing over both of you. The heat of his presence, so close yet still restrained, is something you’ve slowly come to tolerate, even accept, though the bitterness of your lost future never fully leaves you.
“You’re thinking of him,” Aegon says after a long pause, his voice soft but heavy with understanding. “Of the Stark.”
You stiffen slightly, your eyes still fixed on the flames. It is rare that he speaks of Torrhen. You’ve both avoided the subject for the most part, as if not naming it could keep it from being real, from haunting what little peace you’ve managed to find. But Aegon is nothing if not perceptive, and tonight, it seems, he is unwilling to let it lie.
“Yes,” you admit, the word slipping from your lips before you can stop it. There is no point in denying it—Torrhen is always there, lingering in the corners of your mind, a shadow of what could have been. “I think of him often.”
Aegon nods, though the movement is barely noticeable, his gaze distant now, as if he too is grappling with something he cannot fully understand. “I know,” he says quietly, his tone carrying no anger, no jealousy—only resignation.
You turn to face him, surprised by his lack of hostility. For so long, you had expected rage, had anticipated that his possessiveness would rear its head whenever you so much as mentioned the man who had once been your future. But Aegon has changed, in subtle ways, since you returned to each other’s orbit.
“I tried to take everything from you,” he continues, his voice rough with the weight of the admission. “But I could never take him from your heart, could I?”
The vulnerability in his words surprises you, catches you off guard. Aegon has never been one to admit weakness, and yet here he stands, acknowledging the one thing he cannot conquer—your love for Torrhen Stark.
“No,” you say softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “You can’t.”
He sighs, and for a moment, he looks almost weary, as though the weight of his victories, his crowns, his conquests have finally taken their toll. “I’ve conquered kingdoms, united the Seven, but when it comes to you, there’s always... something I can’t reach.”
You meet his gaze then, your eyes locking with his. There is something raw in his expression, something fragile and unguarded. And for the first time, you see not the conqueror, not the king, but the man beneath all that—the man who, despite his power, is haunted by the one thing he cannot command.
“You have me now,” you murmur, though the words feel like a compromise, a truth that does not tell the whole story.
He steps closer, his hand brushing yours lightly, as if testing the boundaries of your comfort. “But I don’t have all of you, do I?” His voice is soft, tinged with a sadness that you have rarely heard from him.
You don’t answer right away, because you don’t need to. The silence between you speaks volumes. He already knows the answer, and so do you. No matter how much time passes, no matter how close you become, a part of you will always belong to Torrhen Stark—a part that Aegon, for all his might, will never possess.
Still, you allow his fingers to lace with yours, a small gesture of acceptance. You do not love him, not in the way he wants, but there is a quiet understanding growing between you, a shared sense of loss that binds you in a way you hadn’t expected.
“I’ll never be him,” Aegon says softly, his thumb brushing lightly over your knuckles. “But I’ll try to be what you need.”
The words hang in the air between you, a promise that feels both hopeful and tragic. You look up at him, searching his face for any hint of deceit, but there is none. He is being truthful, as much as he can be. Aegon may never be the man you dreamed of sharing your life with, but perhaps, in his own way, he is trying to build something out of the wreckage of what he destroyed.
“I know,” you whisper, your voice barely audible.
He leans in slightly, his forehead resting gently against yours, and for the first time, there is a sense of peace between you. The fire crackles softly behind you, the warmth of it surrounding you both as the night deepens. Aegon may never truly understand the depth of your love for Torrhen, but in this moment, he doesn’t need to. What matters now is the quiet bond forming between you—a bond not of passion, but of shared wounds and quiet resolve.
And though the ache for what was lost still lingers, for the first time, you wonder if perhaps, in this strange, broken way, you and Aegon might find a path forward together. Not as lovers, but as something else—something more complicated, but no less real.
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Ending Where Y/N Stays
The night sky is a deep velvet blanket above Aegonfort, scattered with stars that twinkle faintly against the vast expanse. 
You stand by the window, staring out at the dark horizon, lost in thought. It has been a full moon since the quiet understanding between you and Aegon began to grow, since the edges of your shared pain started to blur. The walls you had built around yourself, brick by painful brick, have not crumbled, but they’ve begun to weaken, piece by piece. And tonight, something feels different. Something inside you has shifted, though you can’t name it.
The sound of the door opening behind you breaks the silence, and you don’t need to turn to know it is Aegon. His presence is familiar now, though it still stirs a flutter of uncertainty in your chest. His footsteps are slow as he crosses the room, stopping just a few paces away. The air between you is charged, not of hostility but of something else, lingering in the space between you.
“You’ve been distant today,” Aegon says softly, his voice carrying a note of hesitation, though his usual confidence remains. He stands just behind you, close enough that you can feel the warmth of his body, though he doesn’t touch you.
You don’t answer immediately, still staring out at the night, your fingers lightly gripping the stone ledge of the window. After a long pause, you turn to face him. His violet eyes meet yours, searching for something he cannot yet name, and for the first time in a long while, you don’t look away.
“I’ve been thinking,” you finally say, your voice quiet but steady. The weight of what you are about to say rests heavily on your shoulders, but there is no fear in it—only the calm that comes with acceptance.
Aegon’s brow furrows slightly, his gaze questioning, but he says nothing, waiting for you to continue.
“For so long, I’ve kept you at arm’s length,” you say, taking a slow breath. “I’ve pushed you away because I couldn’t bear the thought of... letting you in.” You pause, your chest tightening with the weight of the truth you’ve kept buried for so long. “But I can’t keep living like this, Aegon. Neither of us can.”
The silence that follows is thick, filled with all the things neither of you have said, all the things you’ve left unspoken. Aegon’s eyes soften as he steps closer, his hand lifting slowly to rest gently on your arm. His touch is light, almost tentative, as if he’s afraid of crossing some unseen boundary.
“What are you saying, Y/N?” he asks, his voice low, barely more than a whisper.
You meet his gaze, your heart pounding in your chest, though not with fear. You take a step closer, closing the distance between you until you can feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, the heat of his body radiating through the small space that remains.
“I’m saying that I’m tired of fighting,” you murmur, your voice trembling slightly. “I’m tired of denying what’s right in front of me.”
For a moment, Aegon says nothing. His eyes search your face, as if trying to understand the full meaning of your words, to grasp the depth of what you are offering. And then, slowly, his fingers slide down your arm, tracing a path to your hand, where he intertwines his fingers with yours. His touch is gentle, but there is a quiet urgency in it, a need that has been simmering between you for far too long.
“Are you sure?” he asks, his voice barely audible, a note of vulnerability slipping through the cracks of his usual bravado.
You nod, the tension in your chest easing slightly as you look up at him, your heart no longer weighed down by hesitation. “Yes,” you whisper, the word carrying with it the weight of your decision.
Aegon’s breath catches, and for a moment, he simply looks at you, as if trying to commit this moment to memory. Then, without another word, he lifts his free hand to your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly across your skin. The touch is soft, almost reverent, and the tenderness of it sends a shiver down your spine.
He leans in slowly, giving you the chance to pull away, to stop this before it begins, but you don’t. You close the distance, your lips meeting his in a kiss that is tentative at first, testing the boundaries of what you are ready to give. But as the moments pass, the kiss deepens, growing in intensity, the pent-up emotions between you spilling over, unchecked and unguarded.
Aegon’s hands slide to your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss becomes more insistent, more desperate. Your fingers curl into the fabric of his tunic, holding onto him as if he is the only thing grounding you to the world in that moment. The heat between you rises, and before long, the space that once separated you has vanished entirely.
He pulls away just enough to catch his breath, his forehead resting against yours as his hands cup your face, his eyes searching yours. “If you want to stop...” he begins, his voice rough with desire, but you silence him with another kiss, your answer clear.
The rest of the night passes in a blur of heat and whispered promises. His hands move across your skin with a gentleness you hadn’t expected, but there is an urgency in the way he touches you, as if he’s afraid this moment might slip away if he doesn’t hold on tightly enough. You match his pace, your body responding to his with a need that surprises even you.
When the last barriers fall, when you finally allow him to take you, there is no hesitation. No more fear. The weight of the past is still there, lingering in the shadows of the room, but for the first time, it doesn’t define you. In that moment, with Aegon’s arms wrapped around you, with his body pressed against yours, the pain and anger that have haunted you for so long feel distant, like a memory you’ve chosen to let fade.
When it’s over, you lie together in the quiet of the night, the fire in the hearth casting a soft glow over your entwined forms. Aegon’s breath is slow and steady beside you, his hand resting lightly on your waist, his touch still gentle even in sleep. You close your eyes, exhaustion pulling at you, but your thoughts linger on the moment that just passed.
You know he loves you, and in some strange, broken way, you love him too. But the part of you that still belongs to Torrhen Stark remains untouched, a quiet, persistent ache that will never fully leave you. Aegon may have you now, but he knows—as you do—that he will never have all of you. And in the end, perhaps that’s enough.
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Ending Where Y/N Leaves
The moon hangs low in the night sky, casting a pale, silvery light over Aegonfort. The fortress is still, the only sounds the distant crash of the waves and the occasional rustling of leaves in the wind. Inside, the corridors are quiet, the courtiers and guards long retired to their quarters. But sleep does not come for you tonight.
The decision has been growing inside you for days, a quiet resolve that started as a whisper and has now become impossible to ignore. The weight of it presses heavily on your chest as you stand in your chambers, your gaze drifting toward the window where the faintest glimmer of stars can be seen.
You cannot stay.
The walls of Aegonfort feel like a cage, closing in around you, and no amount of quiet moments or tender gestures from Aegon can change that. The love he seeks, the connection he so desperately craves, is not something you can give him. You have tried—gods, you’ve tried—but the life he built for you, the crown he placed on your head, is not the one you wanted.
And so, you’ve made your choice.
You move through your chambers with quiet purpose, pulling on a cloak and gathering only what you need for the journey ahead. Your heart races in your chest, not with fear but with a strange sense of calm. This is right. This is the only way. The only way to reclaim a piece of the freedom you lost.
Slipping through the silent halls of the fortress, you avoid the gaze of the few guards posted along the corridors, your movements careful and deliberate. The heavy stone walls seem to press in around you as you descend the steps that lead to the stables. Tesaerix is there, waiting for you, as if she can sense what is about to happen.
The air grows colder as you approach the courtyard, the scent of the sea strong in the night breeze. The dragon stables loom ahead, dark and silent, and for a moment, you pause, your heart hammering in your chest. But there is no turning back now. Not after everything.
Tesaerix stirs as you step into the open space, her golden and crimson scales catching the moonlight as she shifts her massive wings. She is restless, and her eyes gleam in the dim light, locking onto you the moment you approach. There’s a flicker of understanding in her gaze, and as you reach her, she lowers her head, letting out a low, rumbling sound.
You press your hand to her warm scales, your fingers trembling slightly. "It’s time," you whisper, the words barely audible in the stillness. Tesaerix’s breath huffs against your skin, her body tensing as if she, too, has been waiting for this moment.
The saddling is quick, your hands moving through the motions with practiced ease. You pull yourself up onto her back, settling into the familiar seat between her powerful wings. For a brief moment, you glance back at Aegonfort, the towering structure outlined against the night sky. The place that has been your prison, the place where you have been both queen and captive.
You take a deep breath, steadying yourself, and with a quiet command, Tesaerix lifts into the sky. Her wings beat powerfully, carrying you higher and higher, the ground falling away beneath you as you ascend. The rush of the wind in your ears drowns out the last remnants of hesitation, and for the first time in what feels like an eternity, you feel free.
The stars stretch out above you, vast and endless, and the open sky welcomes you like an old friend. Tesaerix soars with grace, her wings cutting through the cool night air, and you urge her eastward, away from Westeros, toward the horizon where the distant lands of Essos await.
You do not look back.
The sea below stretches out in endless darkness, the waves crashing silently against the shores you are leaving behind. The life you once dreamed of—Winterfell, Torrhen, a future filled with love and quiet moments—feels distant now, like a memory from a different life. And Aegon, for all his power and his efforts to keep you by his side, cannot follow you here. Not this time.
The night passes slowly, the rhythm of Tesaerix’s flight steady and constant as she carries you farther and farther from the world you once knew. The stars shift above you, guiding you onward, and the distant lights of ships below seem small and insignificant compared to the vastness of the sky.
You do not know where you will land, or what lies ahead in Essos, but for now, that uncertainty is a comfort. It is a reminder that you still have choices, that your fate is still your own to shape.
As the first light of dawn begins to break on the horizon, you feel a strange sense of peace. The path before you is unknown, but it is yours. 
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locomoqo · 13 days ago
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Could we get something related to gun trying to convince the reader who he loves to stay with him. Reader is conflicted with her feelings because she loves him but she’s aware of his job and how dangerous it is for the both of them. Angst & comfort please!
love me like a sailor
— gun park x reader
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details: angst with comfort, established relationship
A/N: 1.2k words whewww, also i hope i did gun's personality justice here🥹 i rlly do believe he'd soften around someone he loves (i have a feeling this didnt come off as angsty as i wanted it to be bleh)
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The room is dimly lit, shadows stretching long across the floor as the evening light fades behind heavy curtains. Gun stands in front of you, his usually impassive face softened by an emotion he rarely shows—vulnerability. The tension between you both is almost suffocating, a thick silence hanging between breaths. Your heart is heavy with the weight of a decision you don’t want to make.
“I don’t know if I can keep doing this,” you murmur, your voice barely a whisper. You clutch your arms, holding yourself together because you’re afraid that if you let go, you’ll fall apart. You look up at him, eyes filled with the conflict that’s been tearing at you for weeks. He’s been distant lately, lost in the chaos of his work, and you can’t pretend any longer that it doesn’t scare you.
Gun’s jaw tightens, his usually stoic expression cracking for a brief second. There's a flicker of something fragile in his eyes. He steps forward, a little too quickly, as if he's scared you might vanish. “I’m here now, aren’t I?” he says, his voice quiet and distant—just like it always is.
You meet his gaze, your eyes brimming with unshed tears, hating that he makes it sound so simple. “But for how long?” you ask, your voice breaking. “You’re always chasing danger, always fighting, always risking everything. I can’t... I can’t keep pretending it doesn’t tear me apart every time you walk out that door.” The words spill out of you, each one a stab to your own heart. You hate how weak you sound, how vulnerable. But you can’t help it. You can’t stop loving him.
Gun’s brows furrow, his usual mask slipping as he takes a step closer. He towers over you, but there’s a gentleness in his eyes that contradicts his imposing presence. His hands tremble slightly as he reaches for you but stops, hovering with uncertainty as if he’s not sure he has the right to touch you anymore. “I don’t know how to be different,” he admits, his voice raw and low, twisting your heart. It's true, fighting has become part of who he is, it's all he's ever known. “This is who I am. But if it means losing you, I’ll—”
“No,” you interrupt, shaking your head, feeling tears sting at the corners of your eyes. “I don’t want to be the reason you lose your edge. I don’t want to be your weakness.”
You see frustration flare in his eyes, the helplessness he fights so hard to conceal. His hands drop to his sides, curling into fists as he takes a shaky breath. “Do you think I want to be this way?” he asks, his voice suddenly fierce, desperation cutting through his words. “Do you think I don’t know what it does to you every time I leave? I’m trying, damn it, but I can’t just walk away from who I am. I’ve built my life around this, and I can’t change it, not overnight.”
He stretches his hand out, catching yours before you can pull away. There's an urgency in his grip—an unspoken plea hidden beneath his cold facade. The anger fades from his face, replaced by something hollow and broken. “You’re not my weakness,” he insists, his hold firm but gentle. “You never have been. You’re the only person who makes me want to be better. For you.” He swallows, eyes locked on yours. “I know it’s dangerous. I won’t lie to you about that. But I can protect you. I will protect you.”
Your heart aches at the sincerity in his voice, but you know it’s not enough. You pull your hand back, wiping away a tear before it can fall. “What if something happens to you?” you ask, your voice cracking. “What if I lose you?”
Gun’s expression tightens, and he reaches for you again, his hands settling on your shoulders with surprising gentleness. “Nothing’s going to happen to me,” he says firmly, his voice steady, as if daring fate to contradict him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
He almost adds, “Not if it means leaving you,” but the words die in his throat.
“...I don’t want to leave,” you say, your voice hoarse, and it’s the truth. You don’t want to lose him. You don’t want to be without the man who’s somehow become the most important part of your life, the one who knows you better than anyone else. “But I don’t want to watch you destroy yourself either.” Your voice wavers, and you turn away as a sob escapes before you can choke it down.
Gun’s fingers gently tilt your chin back, his touch tender in a way that takes you by surprise. “Look at me,” he commands, his tone softer than you’ve ever heard. You meet his gaze, and for the first time, you see the raw fear in his eyes—the fear of losing you. “I’m not asking you to ignore the danger. I’m asking you to stay with me.”
Your chest tightens, and you shake your head as tears finally spill over. “I don’t know if I’m strong enough for this,” you admit, your voice barely audible.
Gun’s hands come up to cup your face, and this time, he doesn’t hesitate. His touch is achingly gentle, his thumb brushing away the tears that fall down your cheeks. “Then don’t watch,” he says, his voice teetering on desperation. “Let me be the one who takes the risks. I’ll handle it. I’ll handle everything if it means I can keep you by my side.” His voice is so soft, so uncharacteristically vulnerable.
“Isn’t that enough?” His eyes, usually so cold and distant, search yours, desperate for any sign that you might stay.
For a moment, all you can hear is the pounding of your own heartbeat, each thud echoing in your ears. The tears come faster now, and you let yourself lean into his touch, feeling the warmth of his palms against your skin. There’s a sadness in his gaze that cuts you to the core, but there’s also hope—a fragile, flickering flame that refuses to die.
Your hands tremble as you cling to the fabric of his shirt, your fingers curling into the material. “I love you,” you whisper, your voice breaking, “but I’m scared, Gun. I’m so scared.”
His arms wrap around you, pulling you against his chest. His hold is firm and unwavering, like he’s trying to shield you from the world itself. “Then be scared,” he whispers into your hair, his breath warm against your temple, “but don’t go.”
It's the first time you’ve ever heard him beg, and it shatters something inside you. You stay there, wrapped in the security of his embrace. He’s far from perfect, and so are you, but in this moment, you find a sort of peace—a hope that, maybe, love is enough.
Gun pulls back slightly, his hands still cradling your face as he stares at you with an intensity that steals your breath. “Stay,” he whispers, his voice rough and desperate. “I promise I won’t let anything happen to us.”
You don’t know what the future holds, or if his promise is one he can keep, but in this moment, as his thumb gently brushes your cheek, you find yourself nodding, your resolve crumbling in the face of the man you love. Gun exhales shakily, a soft, relieved sound, and pulls you closer, burying his face in the crook of your neck. For the first time in a long while, you feel like maybe—just maybe—everything will be okay.
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the-blind-bard · 8 months ago
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Parasite Shigaraki x Reader Pt. 2
|Part 1 | Part 3 (Soon) | Masterlist |
Synopsis: [Strangers/Lovers, Smut, Loser!Obsessive! Shigaraki] - |Shigaraki x Reader| Your family called your quirk "parasite", able to feed off of someone's quirk and make it temporarily your own. Luckily, the only other person on the subway happens to have the most powerful quirk you've ever seen and zero experience with women.
Content: MDNI, stalking, voyeurism, mention of masturbation, mutual obsession, reader has a quirk, submissive Shigaraki
You hadn’t heard from him at all.
Nights were spent pacing around your shitty excuse of an apartment, bitter curses leaving your lips and hands itching to destroy everything around you. 
You were irreparably mad that your lust for power must have -understandably- scared him off. 
For fucks sake, (Y/n). You killed a guy in front of him.
That might have been the most impulsive thing you’d ever done.
If only you had stuck to the friendly and cute act, not showing him the power-hungry monster that lives beneath your skin.
He would have been so easy. 
You could tell the minute you touched him that he would do anything you asked, clumsy and blushing. 
You were sure if you hadn’t scared him but instead had just pressed your lips to his and let your fingers pull his hair like pretty, blue ribbons, he would have been yours.
He was meant to be yours.
You could have both built him up and broken him down.
And now you sit in the silence of knowing what could have been.
What you could have been.
It threw you into a fit of rage at first. 
When a couple of days had passed without a single text or call, you thought surely you might run into him again on the subway.
Nothing. 
You got more and more desperate.
Taking long walks that were way out of your way, hoping to find out which direction he lived in. 
You were trying so hard to push down the obsession of finding Shigaraki, but every time you remembered the feeling of absolute destruction on the tips of your fingers, you took another hour-long detour home.
It had been a little over a week when you noticed it.
You were walking home from work, feet sore and not looking forward to the purgatory state of being on that subway. Today you were wondering if you should once again try to take some random stops home and seek Shigaraki out, but you were too tired for that today.
Good thing.
It had been another particularly bad day, leaving you with depths of unresolvable anger and an itch in your blood.
But things weren’t all bad.
 At least now you were comforted by the gentle footsteps lingering in the shadows behind you.
Leaving work, you noticed the feeling of eyes lurking in dark spaces. 
Red. 
Like you were being watched by a starved animal.
Flashes of blue.
Poor shy, pretty boy.
You were so sure he would either get on the subway and sit by you or he would approach you on the street, feigning coincidence. 
When you reached the subway, you weren’t so sure anymore.
You walked slowly to the subway stop, hands retreating from the cold and into your pockets. 
You could hear the softest patter of feet behind you. 
How cute.
The destructive little street cat wasn’t aware that he was chasing a panther.
And you let him think he was getting away with it too. 
You did for a couple of days, playing the role of the ignorant airhead, acting entirely unaware of the rapid increase in time he spent “with” you. 
Throughout the day and night, footsteps always echo from not too far behind you. 
You let him believe he had the power. 
You wanted him to get hooked to you like you were the memory of his quirk, unable to chase after anything else. 
When there were a couple of consecutive days where you were sure he’d been following you from morning till deep in the night, you decided he was ready.
Leaving work, Shigaraki was there.
Walking home, Shigaraki was there.
Dead of the night, purposefully leaving your bedroom curtain cracked open, Shigaraki was there.
Leaving for work in the morning?
Depends.
Looks like even he had limits on how persistent he could be. It made you wonder what else he did throughout his days.
What was he sacrificing in his daily life as he spent his time muffling whines in his throat as he peeked through your windows? 
On this day, though, he was there. His footsteps were a little more reckless. Sleep-deprived and dazed by you, he was far from stealthy. 
At this point in allowing him to follow you, Shigaraki is over-confident. 
He thought his girl needed him now more than ever. If she was too stupid to notice someone following her for this long, what would she do without him ever again? He couldn’t trust you to walk home alone. 
Not after that pretty but reckless mouth almost had that guy and his friends come at you like that. 
Tomura wasn’t sure of the extent of your quirk, but he hadn’t seen you use a quirk at all since that night. He was so sure now that you needed him as much as he needed to feel your hands caress his face again. Fuck, touch anywhere. He just needs you-
Tomura’s lethal confidence. 
He seemed to be a little bit bolder than you gave him credit for and it was obvious to you that he wasn’t as innocent either. You’d still grant him shy, but hearing him fail to stifle those pretty noises at night derailed some notions of innocence. 
No, you decided Tomura Shigaraki must be a closeted freak, perverted and nasty in the privacy of his mind and wherever he called home. 
That, you could certainly work with to your advantage. 
It was a little warmer today than usual, a murky and humid heat. 
Even the slight chill of the night did little to stop the sticky feeling of sweat on your skin. 
You dressed appropriately, clothes a little bit more revealing than usual. 
To anyone else, you were just a normal person dressing for the weather. 
But to the footsteps behind you, Tomura couldn’t decide if he loved the feeling of seeing you like this more than how disgusted he was when anyone else looked at you. 
You could hear every step of his, smiling to yourself.
You were near the part of the street where Shigaraki would stay hidden and watch -waiting to make sure you got on the subway- when you suddenly stopped walking. 
Your back was turned to him, but your smile never faltered. This was a drastic risk to take, but you had to do something.
“Would you like to walk with me instead of taking the subway today?”
You didn’t turn around, not wanting to startle the lurking man with sudden movement. For a while, you didn’t hear any response aside from the initial gasp at your question and the approaching sound of nails scratching angry skin.
A shadow was cast on the pavement from right beside you. Illuminated by the glowing street light, his shadow loomed over yours. 
Turning your head to him with a sweet smile, you could see the wild look in his eyes, fingers tearing at his skin with his other hand clutched in the pocket of his hoodie. 
Feral.
“Thank you, Shigaraki.” You started back on your course of walking.
It was odd. 
The two of you had been walking for a decent amount of time and no one made a move towards speaking. You tried to read his body language, but you were too worried about enacting his need to run. 
Meanwhile, he didn’t see anything wrong with the silence at all. He was reveling in your presence.
He was bitter about you finding him out, wondering how long you’d known, but he couldn’t find it in him to care now that you asked for him to walk next to you. God, he missed the smell of you. 
To be able to see every detail of you up close. 
This beats fogging up the window of your room, hand traveling dangerously low as he tries to justify the disgusting way your name leaves his lips in a pathetic prayer for mercy. 
How sweet and peaceful you looked, blissfully sleeping.
His angel. 
Surely angels were forgiving, right? 
You could forgive him as he relentlessly fucks into his own fist, brought to euphoria just by seeing you and remembering what your hand felt like on his skin.
“Join the league,” he mumbled to you so lowly your brows scrunched in confusion. 
“I’m sorry, what was that?” You kept walking, leaning in towards him to hear better.
His breath hitched slightly. Every inch closer you were to him the more alive he felt. 
“League of Villians. I saw you dust that fuckin’ guy the other day. But you’re not shit on your own, so you’d be a dumbass to not join us.” Perfect. Tomura was sure those words perfectly reflected that he simply wants you to come live with him, help him take over the world, fuck him stupid…
You were stunned by how boldly he spoke. This wasn’t the same whimpering man that sticks to shadows. Seems like when Shigaraki wasn’t needy, he was rude. 
Is it bad that it kind of excited you? That you felt goosebumps rise on your flesh in the middle of a summer night? That you like how unpredictable he’s proving to be? 
You like how he has the potential to be destruction embodied and maybe you can pave a path to being the only thing he wants to keep whole and to himself?
Hm. But he was proving unpredictable. 
League of Villians? Who the fuck is this guy?
Looks like you might have to be careful to not get attached to the boy more than the power.
Was this a joke? No way he could be this fucking perfect. 
“Villian, huh?” You smirked at him. “That’s why you’ve been my personal shadow lately? They have you on recruitment?” 
Shigaraku scoffed, but his heart picked up pace, anxiety prickling at being called out for following you. 
“I’m not some idiot lackey, side character. I’m the leader of the league. I also just had to make sure you weren’t some crazy bitch after being stupid enough to kill a guy in front of two witnesses and a stranger and not finish off everyone else.”
Fair enough. That wasn’t your brightest moment, but you could hardly be blamed for that when you were running off of the adrenaline of meeting someone like Tomura Shigaraki. 
“I didn’t want to scare you off.”
Shigaraki felt his heart physically pound, throbbing. Was this a fucking heart attack? God, you were going to kill him. 
You were holding back for him? Why the fuck did you care about a stranger like that? He’d never. 
It was all for him. You’re all for him. You’re his.
“Whatever.” Shigaraki shrugged, but the blush creeping up his pale skin told you enough.
Shigaraki tried to instinctively curl in on himself in flustered embarrassment. His shoulders were hunched forward, hands in his pockets, and his hair shielded his face from your view. 
You reveled in knowing all of his attitude was just a front. 
Carefully, you moved a hand towards him to tuck some of those loose, blue strands behind his ear. 
When his face was exposed to you once more, his eyes were blown wide, looking at you. You were the only person to ever reach out and touch him so boldly, and he thought there couldn’t be a sweeter feeling in this world. 
He couldn’t speak even if he wanted to. Anything would come out as an embarrassing noise or he might not be able to stop himself from simply begging you to touch him again. 
Anywhere.
 However you’d like. 
A deep content flooded your chest like the warmth of an ignited fire. 
“Are there more members of this league?”
He nods. You hum, pretending to weigh a decision you’d already made. 
“Take me there.”
Who was he to not follow a command from you? His feet set forward on the familiar path to the decrepit bar he called home and headquarters. 
tag list: @milolooooong @shiggysgf890 @raccoonc0re @faithyinnitt @nymeriiiia @koreluvsspring @fudo-aki @tomura-complex @lovelylyana07 @chxrrybobaby-sin @confused-smol-fan
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nicarnelian · 5 months ago
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furever with kaji!
₊˚⊹ featuring: kaji ren x gn! reader
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₊˚⊹ summary: when you bring a cat to kaji’s apartment and ask his help in making a decent home for the feline, every request must come with an equivalent reward. for kaji, he thinks kisses are sufficient compensations to your requisition.
₊˚⊹ word count: 1.5k
₊˚⊹ warnings: tooth-rotting cringe fluff, grammar errors!
₊˚⊹ author’s note: binged frieren yesterday, and himmel and frieren occupied my mind, lived on it, rent free 24/7 for the past days! i’m also rewatching 86, bc shinlena are my ogs! anw, enjoy this kaji fic w cats bc i love cats (this is a shameless self-insert fic, if i think abt it) ;)))
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kaji ren finds cats tolerable. well, actually, he considers them insignificant to his daily life, so he does not particularly hate them. the only moments where he would come into interaction with those little felines are when the townspeople would either ask him a favor, such as by catching them or feeding them, or when those cats would rub themselves on his feet and legs.
he doesn’t find them annoying though; he actually consider cats something that helps him calm down, shifting his attention to the little furry animals begging for rubs and pats, rather than the rowdy environment that encircled him. but, there were also times when the cats bite him out of affection, and kaji, knowing the person that he is, screams at the animal. afterwards, kaji would flinch as he watches the cat run away from him, feeling guilty as he looks down at the small strands of fur left on his pants.
after a couple of cat interactions, it would take probably another month or two when he would interact or touch a cat properly. all of these cat memories of kaji were brought up by the current situation between the two of you.
the second you knock on his apartment’s wood door, kaji unlocks it, knowing that you would be visiting him. he missed you, even though you do see each other after classes and during weekends. kaji has gotten clingy with you — the type of clingy that continues to seek the presence of the other, the type that opt to hear your voice rather than casual texts on the flat surface of his phone. but now, he kinda regrets opening the door for you. his gaze travels all around your figure, until it stops at a pint-sized, black and white animal that you hug near your chest.
he looks directly at your eyes, “why the hell is that in your arms?”
the both of you stand motionless, as no one dared to break eye contact. you wear a dumb smile on your lips as you giggle at your boyfriend’s statement. you lightly pet the small animal that leans into your touch. “it’s a kitten!”
“i know it’s a damned cat, but why the hell are you here, bringing a kitten in my apartment?!” kaji could not control the volume of his voice properly, causing him to step back as he realizes what he had done to you. you see the guilt in his eyes spreading, as if afraid of the possibility that he might have hurt you from his words. you quickly give a light smile to reassure him, letting him know it’s alright and he didn’t hurt you in any way with his words.
“well, i didn’t know where to bring it! the landlady at my place doesn’t like pets, so here i am!” you continue giving him that beaming grin of yours. kaji finds you insufferable — the way these walls he had built since he was a child quickly dwindle into nothingness when you forced yourself into his life, with that stupid, witless, yet stunningly delicate smile.
kaji notices how your face contorts to ever single emotion possible — from how your eyebrows furrow in seriousness to annoyance whenever you do your assignments , and how they quickly crumple to relief whenever he says the simplest of motivational quotes that he most probably looked up online since he was new to interacting like this.
in months of dating you, he wanted to know everything about you albeit being impossible — but, he was the type to make any possibility a reality. months into your relationship, he has put into immense effort into knowing you, and you reciprocated such actions from your boyfriend. and, it’s safe to say that both of you are still staying strong after almost a year of being with him.
you welcome yourself into his room, which kaji did not mind since he will always think that whatever that is his is also yours. you settle the cat on his chair, much to his dismay though. “hey! it’ll leave random fur!”
you pout at him, “i just need a box and some discarded fabric to make him a home for the meantime. you have some?” kaji knows how much you love cats, which is why he completely abides by your requests. but, of course, every request comes with a equal reward.
“i have some boxes and i plan to throw away some of my clothes…” he mumbles. you extend your hands at him, like a child asking for candy. kaji smirks.
he walks towards your direction, closing the distance as he draws his face near yours. you flinch at his actions due to how sudden and unpredictable kaji has become. you place your hands on his chest involuntarily, as your eyes lock on his pair of gray eyes as well. “w-what is it…?”
kaji doesn’t crack a smile, but instead, pouts. his index finger points towards the skin of his right cheek. you watch him tilt his head, as if showing the skin to you, and the words he uttered were something you had not even expect to hear in a thousand years. “k-kiss.”
you blink at him, as you could see the tips of his ears reddening from what he asked. he just asked… for a kiss? kaji ren? the boy who had always told you that you were insufferable was asking for a kiss?
“w-what?”
kaji’s face fumes into a shade of red, “n-nothing! never mind what i said, c’mere! as f-far as i remember, some of the b-boxes were underneath my bed! i’ll search for—“ kaji blabbers and stammers all over his words. am i going crazy? he, himself, could not believe he had just asked that from you.
kaji gasps when you clasp his entire face with your hands and peck the location of his cheeks that he was pointing earlier. he grabs your wrists as you continue littering his face with soft kisses. kaji feels like his world is spinning, his mind cloudy, his heart thumping so fast and his face burning red already.
you give him a final peck on his lips and smirk, “awww… are you perhaps kiss-deprived, ren? but don’t worry, i’ll kiss you anytime you want!” you beam at him, after seeing his flushed face. kaji doesn’t respond, which makes you somewhat worried.
“ren?”
his eyes stare at his room’s wooden floor, shoulders moving up and down. his bangs cover his eyes, leading you to simply call out his name multiple times until he slowly brings his gaze upwards to yours. you nervously chuckle at him, trying to break the silence between you both as he bores his eyes into you. “ren…?” you smile cautiously.
“you’re insufferable.” and, he closes the distance between your faces, kissing you harshly. it’s certainly not comparable to this kisses you’ve given him earlier, soft and teasing — his kiss is hungry, as if he’s deprived of water and your mouth is the sole salvation. it’s filthy and rough, but you fondle his lips with equal greediness.
you place your hands on both of his shoulders, balancing yourself at the height of the moment between you and kaji. you feel his tongue grazing your lips. he wraps his arms around your waist, one hand casually roaming your body until his fingers tangle with your hair and push you closer to him. it feels like forever — kissing him in a room that just encapsulates who he is: his scent, his mark, his hands that hold you tightly but not too tight, his eyes that only look at you. the entirety of kaji ren being yours and you being his feels like forever to you.
“meow!”
the both of you stop, heads snapping at the cat already purring at your entangled limbs. it’s almost involuntary how both you and kaji stare at each other and laugh as you wrap your arms around his neck. you feel his forehead press against yours as he whispers, “‘m sorry.”
“for what?” you lean your forehead against his. “nothing, just felt like it. since, you know, accidentally raised my voice on you earlier.” kaji smiles as his head finally drops to the intersection of your neck and shoulders, planting soft kisses on the bare skin.
you ruffle his head, “‘s fine. i know you didn’t mean it.” he hums in response to you.
“but for now, you have to help me make this cat’s home! i’ve given you lotsa kisses earlier, so i expect more help from you!” you poke his cheek, trying to force him to look at you. you wriggle away from his embrace, and kaji finally whispers in response to your statement.
“���m willing to do anything for your kisses. i’m glad to do more even.” kaji smirks at you, causing you to smack his shoulder and ultimately breaking the hug. you’re glad that he’s finally trying to open up more, to talk more. you watch as he kneel towards the cat and let the cat sniff his fingers — a small introduction between kaji and the cat.
you want to savor the moment, and sure you do, because being with kaji ren feels like forever.
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littlemissshoei · 4 months ago
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DARLIN' CAN I BE YOUR FAVORITE?
RENSUKE KUNIGAMI X FEM READER
18+ ; character has been aged up.
story synopsis: Your oh-so cherished friendship with Kunigami fell into shambles the moment he returned from wildcard, discarding everything you guys had built until now into the trash. He visits his home during his two week break, and you're determined to give the boy a piece of your mind.
CONTENT WARNING: friends to "strangers" to lovers, conflict, argument, talking it out, post!wildcard kunigami, kunigami has a soft spot for you, consent check in, manhandling, marking, rough, dirty talk, degradation and praise, breeding kink, creampie, angst with happy ending, aftercare, confessions. characters have been aged up.
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HE WAS SUCH A sweet boy. You had never a guy like Rensuke Kunigami before. A nature as gentle as his wasn't something the world deserved. Ever since he was little, the boy had struggled standing up to bullies. While he never said something back, the effect their words had on him didn't go unnoticed. Slowlyy but surely, he became quieter, more reserved. That once with smiles adorned faced had a somber gloom to it, and it was eating him alive.
That was until a little girl his age said a piece of her mind, yelling at the group from the top of her lungs. In all his life, he had never expected such kindness from a total stranger, it made him feel loved and seen.
Ever since that day, the two of you became unseperable, doing everything you could together. Playdates, school projects, hanging out, it was always the two of you against the world, and you wouldn't have wanted it in any other way.
A friendship like you had with him was something you had never experienced before. Being around him felt comforting — the boy felt like home. You enjoyed talking to him about everything was was on your mind, from the most trivial things to serious issues, and he always sat there, oh so prettily, listening to your soothing voice. The way you opened up to him was one of the many things he admired about you, there were just so many to count!
He loved the way your hair looked every time the soft, summer breeze blew through it, the way your eyes sparkled whenever you got excited. He loved the change in your tone whenever you'd talk to his younger sisters, playing with them so adorably, it almost made his mind wander to scenarios of you being a mom. He loved the way you smelled, the way your touch sent shivers down his spine, and most importantly, he loved you for staying true to yourself, not caring about what others said.
There was definitely something there between the two of you. The issue was that neither dared to cross the line between friends and lovers, scared of what it might result in. Both of your parents teased you about it, alongside Kunigami's sisters who absolutely adored you, but you were afraid, and nothing could be done about it.
Atleast, that's what you thought
KUNIGAMI HAS ALWAYS HAD a passion for football, and he was good at it too. Despite his kind spirit always making him the target of his teammate's outbursts, he happily accepted it as long as he felt the rush of victory.
When he told you about being accepted into a programme to create the perfect striker you weren't surprised, supporting his dream as much as you could. It was exciting at first, and you listened to his stories in awe. He finally managed to make some new friends, and things were going well.
That was until one day, he stopped messaging you. He was online, yet no trace of his presence in your dust catching conversations. It was strange, he usually replied at all times. It went on for a while, until he finally did. When he did though, his words were short and to the point. This wasn't the same Kunigami you knew. Every time you tried confronting him he ignored it, and little by little you had enough.
You remembered oh so vividly how you asked him what he was doing, just for him to tell you to "Stop prying into his personal business because you were annoying." — alongside that, most of his replies were the same. Uninterested and rude.
Months had passed since the last time you had spoken to your so called best friend — who was more like a stranger at the moment — and even though it hurt, life moved on without uncertainity. It wasn't worth crying over spoiler milk, after all, you still had his sisters by your side who also took notice of his strange behaviour.
Today you decided to visit his house again. The girls had been nagging you all week about visiting them again, and you couldn't say no. You got ready and finally made your way towards the Kunigami household, where you were met by a strange surprise.
ONCE YOU OPENED THE the door, you walked straight into the firm, muscular back of a tall figure. You stepped back and looked up, noticing a familiar haircut. Your eyes widened as you muttered a simple "sorry" before walking past him into the living room, not even daring to look him in the eyes.
Kunigami's little sister was happily waiting for you in the livingroom with a tea set and two tiaras, one resting on her head while the other awaited to be seated on yours. A warm smile tugged at your lips as you sat down next to her, listening to the etiqettue she had prepared for the two of you as you placed the tiara on top of your head.
You didn't notice the tall male spying on the two of you from the corner of the door, an unreadable expression on his face as watched you take care of her as if she was your own kid. So kind, so caring.. He tried to surpress the feeling bubbling inside his chest, but it grew the longer he stared at you. He walked away, leaving the two of you enjoy the rest of your time together.
After a while, Kunigami's parents rushed downstairs, gesturing for the little girl to follow them.
"Oh? Do you have to go somewhere? I'll ge—"
"Oh, no! You can stay here [name] we'll be back in a second, just wait a little." The other sister replied as she put her coat on and waved her goodbye.
You weren't even able to complain before the door closed and you were left alone in the livingroom. Shrugging, you got comfortable on the couch, deciding to let the time pass by scrolling endlessly on your phone.
Great plan, but not waterproof. You happened to forget to charge your phone earlier today and your charger was not in your jacket's pocket. Just great! Luckily, you remembered about the spare charger you left here for situations like this. Your fingers flew over the keyboard as you typed out a message to Kunigami's sister, asking where it was. She replied fast, and your face took a sour turn when she told you it was in the boy's room.
Just what you needed, a confrontation with Rensuke. You groaned, standing up almost hesitantly before making your way towards the stairs.
You knew your way to his room, it was where the two of you spent your most time together. With one last, deep breath you opened the door and gasped when you saw the scene in front of you. Out of all possible times you walked into him getting changed. Shirtless. He seemed to have gotten more muscular, and you couldn't stop your mind from wondering how his back would look like full of scratches. Your face reddened as you looked down and you could hear a faint scoffing. It took everything in your power to not slap some sense into him. Instead, you looked up to face him again, a smile tugging at your lips.
"Hey, Ren. Have you seen my charger?"
He looked at you, almost confused before he turned his back to you. The audacity this boy had right now.
"What the.. Hey! What the hell man. Just tell me where the charger is, dammit."
You were met with the same quietness.
And that was enough to make you snap.
YOUR HAND GRASPED HIS shoulder and turned him around. You could see that he was caught off guard, but simply couldn't care less.
"You fucking idiot what the hell happened to you?? why are you acting the way you are, are you crazy?!" You said, tone raising the more worked up you became. Ultimately, once you started talking, nothing could stop you any longer from pouring you heart out to him. Your yelling was followed by tears and franctic hand movements, waving around as you told him just how much his behaviour was hurting you.
"You're doing it again and again, treating me like shit, as if I mean nothing to you! Is that what it is Rensuke? Have you gotten tired of me, does nothing what I did for you have any meanings?! What the fuck happened to you, what made you become a total asshole?!"
Finally, everything came to an end, and as you were about to walk out, having given up on obtaining the charger, Kunigami pushed you against the door, slamming it shut as he towered over you. Your eyes widened in surprise, heart beating out of your chest as you looked up to meet him face. He didn't say anything, just inched closer and closer until your faces were only milimeters away. The boy's breath was fanning over your lips, the room filled with the sound of heavy breathing.
"R..re—"
Before you could finish your sentence his lips crashed into yours, meeting them in a fierce, passionate kiss. His tongue ghosted over your lower lip and entered your mouth once he felt you gasp. You were more than surprised. You should be mad at him, push him away, reject him even. But the heart wants what it wants, and right now it craves to cross the line you never dared to cross.
Your hands found their way in his hair, causing a stiffled moan to escape his lips once you started tugging at it. The kiss made you dizzy and breathless, and once you finally parted to catch your breath, Kunigami snaked his arm around your waist and dragged you towards the bed, pushing you down before hovering over you and resuming his attack on your lips.
He knew that he did not deserve your kindness, and that you should've walked away, but if there was one thing the male learned while attending Blue Lock was that you wouldn't get anywhere without being selfish.
Being a little egoistical wouldn't hurt now, would it?
Without breaking the kiss he spread your legs open, getting in between them as his hand slid down your body, sneakily creeping under your shirt.
Kunigami broke the kiss, distancing himself to look at your face. You were a mess, panting, eyes half lidded, lips bruised because of how he kissed you. You were stunning.
"Rensuke..."
You breathed out, watching his expression soften as his calloused hand cupped your cheek.
"We can stop right now." The male said firmly. No matter how badly he wanted you, he didn't want to hurt you in the process.
"No." You replied, standing your ground. Something in his eyes seemed to have change, lust flickering in them.
"No backing out now."
Your body felt on fire with the way his hands worked on it, touch as electrifying as it could be. Your shirt was discarded of the moment you said no, and his rough hands had a hard time unbuttoning your bra. Once he managed to do so, it was thrown across his room.
You had never seen this side of Kunigami before. He was like an animal in heat. Yet, you couldn't deny how much it turned you on. You didn't even notice it until you realized you were grinding up against him, but he didn't seem to mind. With one hand hand he groped your breast, while the other was being attacked by his mouth, tongue swirling around your now hardened nipple. You felt overwhelmingly good, whines and moans escaping your lips. After he finished up ravaging your chest, his breath ghosted over your body as he left marks in its wake, both in visible and invisible places, almost strategically.
The rest went like a whirlwind. The sounds of clothes ruffling accompanied by heavy breaths and beating hearts caught your attention, and soon you found yourself staring at his massive, throbbing cock, standing up with precum leaking from the reddened tip.
HIS FINGER SLID DOWN from your stomach to your exposed cunt, experimentally sliding two digits in while his thumb worked its way with your clit. All you could do was blabber his name, feeling yourself grind against his fingers that were pumping in and out of you. This wasn't enough, no. He needed more. YOU needed more, and he was happy to oblige.
Once he pulled them out, you felt empty and cold, but that feeling was soon replaced by the sensation of his tip rubbing in between your wet folds.
" 'M gonna fuck you like the whore you are, hm?"
All you could do was nod, gripping onto the matress as he started sliding his thick member into your tight hole. You had never experienced something like this, it hurt so bad yet felt so good, the burning sensation sending shivers down your spine. Once he was completely in he didn't hesitate in the slightest, instead he started thrusting in and out at a merciless pace, sliding his lenght all the way out before ramming it inside.
His tongue dragged across your neck, hands groping your tits as he bullied his cock into your needy cunt. The way your ways fluttered and clenched around him, eagerly forming themselves in his shape. It was something to die for, something he had craved for so long.
"You like that hm? When I'm all rough with you. Fucking filthy."
He spat out as his arms hooked around your legs, spreading them wider for better access. His balls slapped against your ass as he continued going, overstimulating you to the point your brain felt like nothing more mushy sponge.
You felt your orgasm nearing, and so did he. Kunigami smirked, picking up his pace.
"Come on, cream all over that cock, won'tcha? You seem so eager to get me all dirty anyway."
That was enough to make you come, his pace never slowing down as you rode out your orgasm.
"Now you're gonna be a good girl for me and make me cum too, won't you?"
You franctically nodded, his tip kissing your cervix with each thrust.
The closer he got to his orgasm, the more images of you with his little sister flashed before his mind, and he knew what he had to do.
" 'M gonna fuck a baby into you. You'd make such a good mommy, so, so pretty with my cum all stuffed into you."
"Fuck.. yes please!"
"You want that?" He cooed.
"I do, please Ren!" You moaned out as he pressed up against you, chest flush against yours as he kissed your cheek.
"Then so be it."
And with that he released inside you, your eager cunt milking his cock dry until all his seed was inside. His sloppy thrusts fucked everything in deeper, making sure no drop was wasted.
His forehead leaned against yours, eyes watching you as you slowly recovered from the wild ride.
Kunigami pulled out and stood up. You were wondering where he went until he came back with a towel and helped you get cleaned up. He tenderly kissed your stomach and wrapped the blanket around you.
"Uhm.. Ren. I think I should get dressed maybe..?"
You suggested, remembering his parents could be back at any minute.
"Right."
You quickly found your clothes — all except for your shirt that seemed to have dissapeared into thin air. —
"Have you seen my shirt?"
He shook his head, instead throwing another shirt in your direction.
"Wear this."
"Your.. jersey?"
"Yeah."
Your cheeks reddened as you put it on. It smelled like him, and the material felt so good.
Now it was time to talk about what happened.
"Ren.. would you mind explaining what the hell was going on? Do you hate me?"
He sat down next to you and sighed, grimacing slightly.
"Ofcourse I don't, [name]. I love you too much for that."
"I love you too Ren.. I think it's obvious in what way too."
"Yeah.. same here."
"So if we both feel the same.."
"I want you to be my girlfriend yeah."
"I'd love that. But don't try and dodge the topic we were discussing earlier."
He sighed but ultimately gave up, explaining in heavy detailed what happened in blue lock. Your face twisted in sadness and you pulled him into a tight hug after he finished speaking.
"What?"
"I just felt like you needed a hug. Did you not?"
"I did. Thank you. I'm sorry for everything."
The way his voice broke made your heart ache and you smiled, cupping his cheek.
"It's okay. Just, please. Talk to me next time. I'd never leave you, you know that right?"
"I do, yeah. You're right."
He pulled you back onto the bed, wrapping his arms around you as he planted a kiss on your head.
"I love you, [name]"
"I love you too, Ren"
You didn't know when you started becoming sleepy, yet soon enough the both of you drifted off to sleep, and when his sister walked in to ask him where you went, she fistbumped the air when she saw the two of you cuddled up in his bed.
"WE DID IT!"
She cheered once she rushed downstairs, highfiving her parents as they all snickered.
"I knew we'd get them to confess. This plan was bulletproof."
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greynatomy · 8 months ago
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confessions and accidental meetings
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ona batlle x reader
prequel to soft launch. requested here
———
Arriving at your favorite coffee shop, you swing the door open only to feel some resistance on the other side.
“Oh my god! I am so sorry!” You’ve not even looked at the person, but grabbed as many napkins as you could to start wiping her down. “I am such a klutz.”
What you don’t notice is the person smiling widely at you, entertained at how you’re wiping her down and apologizing nonstop. She reaches out to grab one of your wrists to stop your panick.
“It is okay.” She tells you once your eyes reach hers.
You swear you could’ve melted right there and there. The hand she isn’t holding is stilled on her shirt over her stomach where you were absolutely sure you felt some indentations.
You couldn’t look away, opting to just nod as words aren’t able to properly come out of your mouth.
Ona was loving every second of this interaction, loving how you melt to her touch, a complete stranger’s.
Despite being soaking wet, Ona sat down with you at a table, attentively listening to to whatever you had to say. It was a bit difficult to understand, but all she knew was that she didn’t want to stop talking to you.
“Can-can I get your, uh, number?”
You gave it to her without hesitation, telling her that you’d be her tour guide of Manchester. You brought her to your favorite places, Ona making a mental note about everything you’ve said and shown her.
In the three months since you’ve met, your jobs never came up, relishing in the bubble you two have built around yourselves. There was an understanding that you both very much liked each other more than friend’s, it was just a matter of who has the guts to take it to the next level.
Seeing as you weren’t going to do it, Ona dragged you out of your apartment, taking you to all of your favorite places. You loved how she remembered everything you’ve told her, everything being highlighted on this day.
Last but not least, you’ve both made it to the coffee shop you’ve both met at, always feeling nostalgic whenever you step foot in it.
“I, uh, wanted to ask you something and I thought it’s good to come back here to do it.” You nod, telling her to continue. Ona squirmed in her seat, avoiding eye contact, she stammered, “Um, so, I’ve been thinking… I mean not-not that I think about this all the time, but uh.”
You raise an eyebrow, curiosity peaked. “It’s just me Ona. Spill it.”
Ona took a deep breath, “Well, when we are together, I-I have this weird feeling in my stomach. Not like, not like a tummy ache, but what is it people say? Cockroaches?”
“Butterflies?” You correct her.
“Yes! Uh, yes, butterflies. And I-I like you. More than a friend.”
You blinked, trying to process her words, then broke into a bright smile. “That was the most awkward and adorable thing I have ever experienced. And I also have butterflies in my stomach whenever we hang out. How could I not?”
“Really? Uh, wow.”
“Well, first, let’s stop being awkward and acknowledge that we both like each other. And then… maybe you could come over here and kiss me.”
Ona, seemingly getting all her confidence back, walks around the table to where you sat. Hands cupping both sides of your face, she dips her head down, pulling you into a passionate kiss.
You’ve been together for a good six months now and everyday has been full of laughs, adventure and comfortability. When she found out who your sister was though, she looked like she’s seen a ghost.
“You don’t have to be scared of her, baby. She’s just a big giant teddy bear.”
“She could probably beat me up.”
“Don’t say that! She’s all soft and cuddly.”
Ona didn’t believe you. She’s played against Lucy before and it’s safe to say your sister scares her a bit.
One day, Ona had just finished training and decided to go and surprise you after not seeing each other for a week with both of your busy schedules. She picked up your favorite flowers and favorite take away and made the journey to you apartment.
She doesn’t bother to knock, using the spare key you’ve given her.
“Mi amore!” She calls out, taking her shoes off by the front door. walking further into the apartment, she’s met with one Lucy Bronze sitting on your couch. “Uh, hello.”
“Ah. So you’re the one my sister is seeing.” Lucy gets up from where she sat, stalking closer to Ona.
“Uh, sí. It is nice to meet you.” Ona gulps, nervous say how Lucy was looking down at her.
“You’re technically the enemy, so I wouldn’t say this is anything but nice.”
They were both staring down at each other, unaware that you’ve walked back into the living room.
“What are you guys doing?”
They whip their head towards you, like they’ve been caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar.
“Just getting acquainted with your girlfriend here.” Lucy says, placing a hand on Ona’s shoulder, squeezing a bit making Ona wince, but tries to hide.
“Lucy, don’t scare my girlfriend please.” You grab Ona’s arm, pulling her away from your sister. “I would like to keep her alive forever.”
“Fine. But just know, I’m keeping a close eye on you. Hurt my sister and I hurt you.” Lucy flexes her bicep, making you let out a laugh.
“You are always flexing, I swear.”
“I promise to not hurt your sister, at least intentionally.” Ona pulls you close, placing a kiss on the side of your head.
“Good. Good. Now, what kind of take out did you bring? I’m hungry.”
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valentine-writes · 1 year ago
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hii!! i was wondering if you could write headcanons for like the main four spider-kids (miles, gwen, pavitr and hobie) with a reader who like smacks people when they laugh really hard? preferably w/ a reader thats a spider-person but its up to you! :3
aggressive affection!
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「 tws + notes: no tws, unedited, dude used once in a gender neutral way, mentions of bruising and minor injuries (but nothing crazy), spider-person reader, reader forgetting that being a spider-person makes them stronger,,, um. (°ー°〃) oops!!! 」
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「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」
↳ ft. gwen stacy, hobie brown/spider-punk, miles morales, and pavitr prabhakar
author's note: YES I CAN YES I CAN!! this prompt iz so funny AUWWUDH I HOPE I DID IT JUSTICE!!! つ﹏⊂ also super excited 2 get to write more of them becuz AWUDGWAAHWGHWAGUAGH I LOVE THESE CHARACTERZ SMM,,, also excuse me if there's more repetition or typos than usual,,, im eepy ( つ᷄ ‸・ )
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GWEN STACY headcanons
▸ the first one to fall victim to your little habit. she doesn't mind in the slightest, mainly because she's generally pretty welcome to friendly touches- even if it is slightly more aggressive than she had expected. frankly, you could've literally bitten her and she probably would've reacted the same.
she's a little awkward about it at first, pausing mid laughter as you deliver playful hits to her shoulder and bicep. she playfully shoves you away at first, like, "haha– what– what are you doing–" but quickly warms up to it
▸ here's the thing though. she 100% will do it back. if you're both joking around and losing it over something, you end up hitting each other through laughter. and it'll INTENSIFY. at some points, everyone's wondering if you two are actually beefing or not ur not. itz the way u show affection 2 one another,,, in the strangest manner
when you're assigned on missions with her, you usually end up chatting– and then you find something hilarious to giggle abt and everything goes off the rails
y'all will return to HQ bruised asf like "nah man the anomaly didn't even touch us."
jessica and miguel DEF pick up the fact y'all goof off and beat each other up before even locating the anomaly HWJEJNDNE
unfortunately– gwen is slowly paired less with you on missions becuz of this. they can't have you distracting one another a girl can never have fun fr </3
nothing that some good behaviour can't fix! just try not to give each other a complete smackdown while on duty and you'll be paired together again in no time! hopefully...
▸ both you and gwen forget that being spider-people involves super strength. and though you're both used to taking a blow or two, it stands plain and obvious that the two of you can get carried away. gwen especially. she's just a little rough sometimes– not like she means to be.
sometimes, the dull ache from the bruises she left leave you wondering if you're both a little too funny for your own good. at least she makes sure to take care of it and hold back,, when she can.
when it's your turn to get carried away, she sees your eyes widen as you splutter a million apologies to her. but every time you deliver one hit too hard, she insists it never hurts much as you think.
"dude, it's okay. you can chill out." gwen reassures. "besides, i'm built tougher than that."
she flashes a grin at you, and it's almost convincing. like she didn't even feel a thing. you know better though– gwen definitely has days where she's more sore than she'd like to be because of you. not like she'd ever admit. she likes the random play fights between the two of you.
though, you will admit that the amount of trips to the infirmary in search of ice packs is getting just the teeniest bit absurd. people are starting to ask questions at HQ-- which is fine. the frozen bag of peas gwen offers to you for your injuries works just as good as any ice pack ...it's been sitting in the bottom of her freezer for God Knows How Long but you don't need to know that
HOBIE BROWN headcanons:
▸ you see how this guy interacts with people???
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hobie's used to friendly touches, and initiates physical contact without overthinking it. that little shoulder shake he does w/ miles makes me smile everytime i heart hobie. ALSO AAUWHEHWH LEBRON AND DWAYNE'S HANDSHAKE BEING HOBIE'S AND PAV'S?? I ADORE.
you really think something as little as a few friendly punches and hits bothers hobie "forehead-kissing-the-homies-goodnight" brown??? /lh + /hj but man platonic physical affection hobie. like. hear me on this one.
▸ he's 100% cool with it– actually initiated it before you did. nothing crazy, a light smack on your back or arm as he laughed with
eventually, while joking around with you, realized you had the same habit
you end up hitting each other quite a bit– but he's not as accidentally aggressive as gwen is. laughing with hobie won't get you hospitalized, he's cognizant enough with his strength to know how much to hold back.
▸ then again, there are times where you get carried away. hobie's quick to shake it off, not feeling the effect of the hit until later– if you notice and apologize, he'll just shake his head and shrug
"nah, nah– it's fine." he insists, chuckling a bit as he rubs the spot where you smacked him. "there's been worse."
and yes, objectively, you know that's true– but you both fight villains in your everyday life. of course there's going to be worse than just a hit too hard. he won't accept an ice pack– but will joke that you could just kiss it better instead
that earns a groan from you, smacking him again in the arm for good measure as he snickers
MILES MORALES headcanons:
▸ doesn't hate it!! not against it!!! find it surprising at first. he didn't expect a playful punch to his arm in response to his little joke, but watching as you giggled uncontrollably, hitting him lightly– he decided that he didn't mind too much
he knows you don't mean any harm, so it's cool with him! he's rolling with the punches literally every time you two are losing it
▸ if you land a smack on him that ends up being a little too hard, he'll definitely try to play it off awkwardly, rubbing it and nervously laughing when you ask if he's okay
"oh sh–" you promptly stop, your smile fading as concern floods your face. he winced slightly at your last hit and it was much to obvious to ignore. "you good, miles? i am so sorry–"
"me? yeah, yeah– it's cool!" he replies dismissively, giving you the lightest punch back. miles laughs nervously at your completely unconvinced expression.
"bro. cmon. be real."
"that? hah– nahh. barely felt it." spoilers!!! he felt it
you keep it in mind to dial it back a bit when with miles, because he barely hits back and hates admitting when it actually hurts.
you'll get an occasional "ow–" with a little chuckle, but he refuses to acknowledge that you might be a bit too rough. he jus doesn't wanna hurt feelings man :(
you're his friend who gets a little too carried away sometimes– and that's fine!!! besides, he can't let gwen and hobie have all the fun.
"you holding back on me?" he asks you, noticing your hits have gotten weaker.
"what's it to you?"
"i can handle it. 's fine!! really!" miles says. there's a beat of silence as you stare at him incredulously.
"and you didn't bruise last time?." you ask, raising an eyebrow.
"yeah."
"...say swear."
miles raises his hands, sighing. "ok, look–" HE WANTZ 2 ROUGHHOUSE W/ HIS FRIEND TOO OK (*ノε`*) besides. u and gwen and hobie seem to have so much fun w/ it,,
▸ because of his stubbornness, you oblige, pulling your punches just a little less when having a little laughing fit with him.
as a result, miles develops a habit deflecting your hits while absolutely losing it. gently shoving your hands away as you smack him, both of you doubling over laughter
miles will say sumn he knows you'll find a lil too funny and just,,, *cue continuous hitting and blocking as he predicts literally Every Movement you make* he's literally learned to parry becuz of u HAJWBDKDNEN
PAVITR PRABHAKAR headcanons:
▸ the type to pretend to beat up his friends while making punching noises when he's bored
he's just lightly tapping u with his knuckles going "pow– pow pow– bam–" under his breath HANWJENDN IM SORRY I FIND THIS FUNNY. i also. do this. (���・・。).
and ur like "...uh. ok."
he's def not opposed to it!! when he has the energy, he's all for it!!! pavitr's playfully hitting, shoving you away, gasping for air as the two of you giggle over something that's only really funny to the two of you.
he's pretty energetic most of the time, and it manifests as you "brawl" with each other as you laugh over some stupid joke.
▸ when you hit him a little too hard, most of the time, he doesn't even notice until the aftermath manifests as a bruise or two on his arms– but even then he doesn't care.
however,,, there are occasions where he initiates it, laughing and smacking you– and when you're laughing with him, raising your hand to hit back, he'll gasp dramatically, recoil instantly and get all dramatic about it i'm projecting all the things i do onto pav i bet u cant tell /sarc
pav the minute you decide to try and get him back– bar for bar, word for word:
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he's just a little guy,, a little guyy,,, nooo,,, itz also his birthday,, he's a little birthday boy– HWJWBDN SORRY THIS IS SO UNSERIOUS
this is a bit that he drags on FOREVERRR like itz the funniest thing in the world
▸ ALL of his hits are a little too hard. he does the fake beat up thing a lot but when you two are roughhousing, you're the one reminding him to chill out through stifled laughs
he'll immediately soften the blows quickly at your request, knowing it's probably best for you to remain as uninjured as possible when not doing mission. can't have your shit rocked before you even face a villain!!! his hits end up somewhere between hobie's and gwen's– an almost perfect middle (*´꒳`*)
almost.
occasionally, he'll literally just... take the hits. not like miles where he's deflecting. he's jus standing there laughing while you smack him. which is a concerning sight for anyone who isn't used to your antics!!!
this happened in hq once and peter b, who happened to be walking by, lowkey thought you were straight up attacking pav
upon hearing the two of you giggling though, he figured that he wasn't witnessing an act of violence and didn't have to step in
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joelalorian · 6 months ago
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Petals of Affection - Part III
A floral mystery in three parts, featuring Jackson!Joel x f!reader
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Summary: A secret admirer gifts you a different flower and a riddle ten times before you put the clues together and discover that he's been right in front of your face the whole time.
Written for @morallyinept's Flora & Fauna challenge. Please check out all the wonderful works created in Jett's honor!
Word count: 3,049
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, fluff, kissing, f!oral, unprotected p in v (it's 20 years into the fucking apocalypse), it's not stated, but I envision Joel having been snipped pre-outbreak, terms of endearment. POV flops around like petals in the wind. Reader has no established age or physical description aside from having hair that gets frizzy with humidity and often dirt-covered hands, because greenhouses, ya know? No use of y/n, none whatsoever.
Dividers courtesy of the wonderful @saradika-graphics. Gif chosen because of the wonderful floral wallpaper ;)
And this sweet little love story has come to an end. Thank you all for coming along for the ride! Your comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated more than I could ever say.
Part I | Part II | Masterlist
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Jasmine Orchid Eustoma Lavender Magnolia Iris Lily Lilac Eucalyptus Rose
JOEL MILLER
Joyful moments shared; the answer lies in the air.
Overwhelmed by your grace, the answer hides in this place.
Endless thoughts of you, the answer is in the view.
Lost in your scent, the answer is present.
Moments with you, the answer rings true.
In your eyes, the answer lies.
Lost in your beauty, the answer is a duty.
Longing for your touch, the answer means so much.
Evergreen thoughts of you, the answer is in the dew.
Remember my love for you, the answer is in you.
JOEL MILLER!
Maria’s eyes roved over your scribbled notes, a broad smile slowly spreading across her face at the underline beneath Joel’s name. “Took you long enough. I was beginning to question your intelligence, girl!”
Heat warmed your cheeks as you laughed, though you weren’t sure if it was due to embarrassment or the wine. “The answer was right in front of my face this whole time, I just couldn’t see it.”
Flopping back on the couch, you felt a bit overwhelmed. Ducking your head between your knees as you leant forward, you sucked in a few deep breaths before baring your soul to your best friend. “I wanted it to be him. I longed for it to be him. But I didn’t dare to hope that it would be him. Do you know what I mean?”
“I do.” Maria’s voice held nothing but understanding. “Hope could lead to despair if not met.”
“Exactly!” you exclaimed, poking your head up to meet her dark eyes. “I couldn’t handle the despair, so I couldn’t dare to hope.”
Maria settled onto the soft cushion next to you, one arm reaching out to rub your back soothingly. “You have nothing to fear now. Joel did all this, for you.” Her free hand gestured at the flowers and notes scattered across the table. “His feelings for you are so deep, so true, that he came up with this elaborate plan to show you instead of just telling you, like any normal person would.”
Pausing, Maria waited until you met her gaze again with a watery smile, wanting to make sure you understood the point she was making. Her eyes earnest and smile broad, she added, “He was afraid to hope, too. But he did and look what has come of it.”
Tears built up, threatening to spill over as you absorbed everything. Joel loved you, just as you loved him, his grand gesture proving it beyond a shadow of a doubt. He dared to hope when you didn’t and thank goodness he did. You two would still be dancing around each other for who the fuck knows how long otherwise.
You stood suddenly, feeling revived and eager to see Joel at once. “I need to see Joel. I need to tell him I feel the same way.”
“Well let’s go then! He’s probably at my house with Tommy.” Maria led the way out of your house after you both scrambled to put shoes on, marching with purpose down the quiet road under the cover of a clear, starry sky.
Despite the late hour, you needed to see Joel, to return his declaration of love now that he bared his heart and soul to you in such a clever, romantic way. Crisp air filling your lungs as you walked, you felt the effects of the wine wear off. You never felt so clear-headed, so full of promise, so full of love.
“Do you know what you’re going to say to him?” Maria asked as you neared her house. Bright lights shining through the curtains showcased the shadowy movements inside of the two men inside.
“Not a clue,” you admitted, suddenly nervous. “My brain hasn’t gotten that far yet. Fuck! What am I gonna say?”
“Well, you could always just walk in and kiss him. Just lay a big wet one right on his lips,” Maria suggested, the nearly full moon reflecting mischievously in her dark brown eyes. As your mouth dropped open, she added, “Yes! That’s exactly what you should do!”
“Well, in the absence of anything better…”
Laughter still bubbled from your bellies as you followed Maria up the front steps and into her home. Nearing sensory overload, every cell of your body vibrated with the burning need to lay eyes, hands, lips on Joel.
“Is that you, honey?” Tommy called from the living room. The two of you turned the corner into the room, and Maria made a beeline right to her husband.
Ignoring the married couple, your attention focused on the other occupant of the room. Joel sat on the couch, leant back in a relaxed pose, one arm slung across the back cushions. His thick thighs spread wide, just begging for you to step between them.
Wide and unblinking, his burnt umber eyes watched as you stepped further into the room. Head tilting quizzically, he licked his lips as you approached with an impossible slowness. Neither of you could look anywhere else, gazes locked, bodies pulling together like magnets.
Joel’s pouty lips parted in surprise when you didn’t seat yourself next to him, electing instead to climb onto his lap. He blinked owlishly at you as your face moved closer, centimeter by centimeter, until your lips met his in a delicate first kiss. However brief, that initial press of your lips against his ignited an inferno within you both. You mouths came together urgently the second time, as lips, teeth, and tongues clashed. Your fingers carded through his silky soft, thick curls, nails tenderly scratching itches on his scalp he didn’t even know he had. He preened under your touch.
So absorbed in each other after months and months of longing and pining, dancing around feelings you hid for each other, the rest of the room blurred to nonexistence. Your ears picked up soft murmuring from Maria and Tommy, but you ignored it. Your world revolved around Joel, and Joel only, at that moment. You shifted, trying in vain to bury beneath every layer of his skin, until you straddled his lap.
At long last, you pulled back as the need for oxygen became unbearable. You and Joel had been pressed so close together, noses smushed as you kissed, that neither of you could even breathe.
“I take it you figured it out.” Joel’s eyes searched your face, voice rumbling from deep in his chest, the sound like velvety chocolate to your ears.
You nodded, lost for words at first and his lips slowly tilted upwards at the corners until his smile reached its limit and the precious dimple in his cheek poked through. “The flowers and notes were so beautiful, Joel. I’m sorry I didn’t figure it out sooner, your riddles were just too good,” you grinned. Tears pricked at the back of your eyes at the look of complete adoration on his handsome face. Sincere happiness welled within you. “The notes, each one more beautiful than the last, I read them over and over. I feel all of that, too.”
Joel’s eyes took on a different shine at your confession, the fire from the hearth glinted in the sudden wetness glazing over them.
“Can I take you home?” he asked gruffly, the need evident in his glossy gaze.
“Fuck yes,” you breathed, giggling as he shifted you both to your feet and practically dragged you from his brother’s house. Neither of you had the wherewithal to say goodbye to Tommy and Maria. They watched the two of you leave with matching satisfied grins before locking up behind you.
“Yours or mine?” Joel questioned urgently as his large hand grasped yours.
“I don’t care,” you replied breathlessly, “whichever is closer.”
“Yours then.” His long legs led you down the deserted street, boots crunching on the hard ground, stopping only once you reached your front porch. He stared into your wide eyes, taking in the vision of your blown pupils and pursed lips. “Are you sure about this?”
“Joel,” you drew his name out in a long sigh, one hand caressing the scruff on his cheek. “I have never been surer of anything in my entire life. Take me inside and make love to me. Please.”
The pitch of your plea shot straight to his cock as he once again nearly dragged you behind him. Grateful that you forgot to lock the front door, there were no impediments to your journey into the house and straight up the stairs to your bedroom.
The urgency slowed once the both of you reached the center of your bedroom. Facing each other as you stood next to the large bed, Joel’s gaze tangibly seared your skin with the absolute heat of it.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, one thick fingertip tracing the ridge of your brow and down the slope of your nose. His bedroom eyes captivating as he pulled at your plump bottom lip with his thumb, lips twitching when your tongue darted out to taste the salt on his skin. “I think I fell in love with you the day we met.”
“Me, too.” Mesmerized by Joel’s touch and thoughtful words, you leant forward, slanting your mouth against his. The kiss tender yet scalding hot as your hands began to slowly undress one another. Part of you could not believe this was happening, while another part of you kept repeating fucking finally.
Once you were both fully stripped of clothing, Joel eased you back onto the bed. The broadness of him hovered over you, legs entangled, and he caressed your skin with one large hand. There was no piece of you he left untouched. Your own hands were drawn to his luscious curls, fingers threading through the locks and massaging his scalp.
Joel soon replaced his hands with his mouth, placing soft, open-mouthed kisses down your body. He paid special attention to your breasts, pausing to lave and nip at the hardened peaks of your nipples. A surprised gasp flew from your mouth when he settled his face between your legs, darting his tongue out to taste your sweetness.
He feasted on you like a starving man, tongue laving at your clit before dipping inside to slurp at your juices. You were so wet for him. Only him. His mouth a form of heaven you didn’t know existed, you mewled and squirmed, muscles twitching as he drew you closer and closer to the cliff’s edge.
“Fuck, you are so good at this, Joel.” The half-moaned words fell from your lips when he slipped a thick finger inside you, quickly followed by another. His mouth continued to work at your clit, licking and sucking as you writhed beneath his ministrations.
A man possessed; Joel drew two orgasms from you before letting up. Easing back, he grinned at you, his facial hair glossy with your juices. “You taste fucking delicious. I could stay down here all night.”
A dewy sheen of sweat covered your entire body from being worked over so well. “Any other time, I wouldn’t stop you. But I want your cock inside me, right now.”
“Is that so?” Joel smirked at you, climbing up your body to settle his hips between your legs. Of their own accord, your hands soothed over the warm skin of his back and down to his ass, where you grabbed handfuls of the meaty flesh.
“Fuck, yes. Please, I need you.”
His eyes sparkled at your plea, but he didn’t move an inch. Your right hand reached between the two of you, grasping hold of his cock and gasping at the sheer size of him. Long and thick in your hand, your mouth watered at the thought of tasting him sometime. Joel grinned again, his expression quickly going slack as you tugged once, twice at his hardened length, running the head between your folds before lining him up with your entrance.
Dark eyes hooded with lust; Joel met your gaze. “You want this?” he questioned one last time, needing confirmation of your consent. The last thing he’d ever want to do is push you too far, too fast. He wanted this to last forever.
“Joel, I promise. I have never wanted someone more than I want you, and only you, right now.” You poured every emotion, every feeling for Joel through your eyes as you pulled him impossibly closer. Angling your hips up, he finally started feeding you his cock, inch by delectable inch. Your mouth dropped open at the stretch when he bottomed out.
“You’re taking me so well, pretty girl.” Joel began to move his hips in a slow, steady rhythm, his arms bracketing your head.
“Ahhh, I’ve never felt so full before. Please don’t stop.”
Soon enough, the only sounds in the room were the gentle slap of skin against skin, your breathy moans, and Joel’s rumbling grunts. Joel kissed you passionately as he fucked into you with deep thrusts, his eyes remaining locked on yours.
Your orgasm built as his cock grazed that perfect spot inside you with each thrust, and the words you’d been too afraid to admit to finally fell from your lips. “I love you, Joel. I love every single piece of the puzzle that you are.”
“And I love you, my angel,” Joel replied, voice gravelly. His hips snapped harder, throwing you both over the cliff. His deep moans were music to your ears as you pulsed around him, drawing every drop of cum from him until he settled heavily half atop you, breathless and sated.
“I can’t wait to do that again,” you blurted, chest heaving, drawing a chuckle from Joel.
“Imma need some time before I can do that again, angel. I’m not a young stud anymore.”
For the first time in many months, you fell asleep in your bed, the vastness of it decreased by Joel’s warm body cuddled up against you.
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“You have everything you need, brother?” Tommy asked, helping Joel load up the saddlebags. “Maria tucked a bottle of wine and some glasses in here for you.”
Doublechecking the supplies, Joel nodded. “I think that’s all of it. Thank your wife for me. None of this would be happening right now without you, Maria, and Ellie.”
Tommy patted his older brother on the shoulder. “Being in love has really softened your edges. I actually like this version of you.”
Joel scowled back at Tommy’s teasing for a moment before his face transformed into a glowing, warm smile at the sight of you. Backpack slung over one shoulder, you wore fitted jeans, a tee shirt, and boots with Joel’s green flannel tied around your waist. To Joel, you’d never looked sexier.
“Hi boys,” you greeted, eyes lingering on the older Miller brother as he winked at you. Turning to Tommy, you batted your eye lashes. “Any chance you’ll tell me where he’s taking me?”
Tommy guffawed. “Not a chance in hell, doll. I don’t wanna get my ass kicked by this lug.”
Oh well, you had to try. Shrugging your shoulders, you climbed up into the saddle of a light brown colored horse. “Fine then. You better make sure my greenhouses are still in one piece when we get back.”
“Yeah, yeah. Off you go lovebirds.” Tommy patted your horse’s hind quarter once Joel mounted his horse and led the way through the town gate.
The horses settled into a canter, covering the landscape at a good clip. “It’s a couple hours ride, but I promise you’ll love it, angel.”
“I trust you, Joel,” you replied, lips pressed into a small smile. “I’m just happy to spend time with you.”
The pair of you chatted about anything and everything as you rode, sharing stories about your pre-outbreak past and the struggles faced since. You already knew about Sarah and how hard Joel took the loss of his beloved baby girl, but Joel felt comfortable sharing more stories of her with you. The conversations were interspersed with occasional comfortable silences as you took in the landscape and kept an eye out for trouble. The hours and miles passed in no time and Joel led you to a stop in front of a rusted-over fence. Dismounting the horse, you swiped a hand over a warped sign which indicated the property was a botanical garden in its former life.
“Joel,” you breathed, touched that he thought of taking you to such a place for your first official date. You had no idea it even existed.
“It’s rundown, obviously, but nature has completely taken over in a way that I think you’ll love. There were flowers everywhere when I first discovered the place. This is where I found some of the ones I gave you,” he explained. Pulling a section of fence open, he led you and the horses onto the property before closing it behind you.
“Tommy and I cleared the placed a while ago, but there may still be some cordyceps lingering around. Keep an eye out.” Joel handed you a pistol, checking first to make sure it was locked and loaded, and swung the rifle from his shoulder.
The grounds were quiet except for birdsong and the rustle of leaves in the breeze. Plentiful flora grew in every direction you turned, overtaking dilapidated benches and buildings alike. The grounds were a vibrant sea of colorful flowers and plants, and a mix of floral fragrances nearly overwhelmed your senses. Joel led the horses into a small area cordoned off on three sides, leaving them to graze while the two of you explored.
Joel reached for your hand, entwining your fingers as you walked the grounds. Even overgrown and unkempt as it was, the garden left you in awe. You strolled, recounting information about every flower you recognized. Joel listened, enraptured, as you spoke about their meanings, falling in love with you even more with every brilliant word that came out of your mouth.
He surprised you with a late lunch in a field of wildflowers on the way back to Jackson, gathering a small bouquet in his hands while you ate. Joel tucked a bright yellow flower with long, thin petals into your hair before handing over the bouquet.
“When you’re ready, I’m going to ask you to marry me, my beautiful wildflower.”
fin
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pumpkin-bats · 5 months ago
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What's Important - Daiki Aomine x Reader
a/n: The poll has spoken! And tbh the results genuinely surprised me. Since Aomine and Akashi tied, I’m gonna do them both! KEEP IN MIND THAT ALL CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP. Thank you. I hope you all enjoy!
summary: He shows up for something important to you that you thought he'd skip.
contains: sfw topics, a bit of personal space invasion, gentle above the neck touching, gender neutral terms for the reader.
wc: 1k+
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It wasn't a date or an anniversary, but you'd be lying if you said it didn't feel equally as important.
The thing that set you on the path for your particular set of career goals was a very specific internship. Ever since your third year of college began, you've focused all your energy and efforts towards trying to get said internship. And you had to learn the hard way that it was a high competition, low acceptance, and extremely difficult to qualify for type gig. Yet you made it.
You'd gotten the news earlier that morning as Daiki was getting ready to head out. In your excitement, you'd nearly burned your hand on the stove.
Thanks to your blatant level of enthusiasm, you ended up explaining the situation to your boyfriend before you could accidentally launch an egg at his face trying to silently contain yourself. And with some huffing and puffing, you both settled on plans to celebrate later in the evening.
At the time, you were too blinded by the pure, utter joy that overcame you that you'd forgotten. Now, as you sit on the couch with food spread across the coffee table along with a few other things, you remembered.
The thing is, Daiki isn't the most... timely person. Not to say he didn't treat you well, he did, he just has an issue with showing up to certain events on time, if at all.
The both of you met in your second year of high school. Things started as a tentative friendship, bordering on arch enemies, before it developed into something more around your third year. And over the years you learned a thing or two about his track record in terms of attendance. Namely, how he'd built a bad habit of skipping basketball practice or any other event he deemed unimportant.
As much as you'd like to say it was something you didn't have to worry about anymore, he still had a tendency to miss or skip out on plans the two of you have made. You'll never forget how one time, during the earlier parts of your budding relationship, he bailed on a date for something he refused to specify. That was also the first time you had your first major fight.
All that to say, as the seconds ticked by and it became a good half hour or so past the agreed upon meetup time, you realized this might just be one of those events he deemed unimportant.
You held out hope, but it was a brittle thing. After all, you knew that getting the internship had a bigger effect on you than it did him. Still... you waited a bit longer.
When it was creeping toward a full hour after what you planned for, you slowly stood up and shuffled forward to start putting the food away. It was when you reached for a large bowl of chips, fingertips barely grazing over the rim, that you heard the lock to the front door click before the telltale squeak of it opening.
"Hey, practice ran late so-" You stand there, arm stretched out in midair, staring like a deer caught in the headlights at your boyfriend who'd just stepped into the living room. A towel was slung loosely over the back of his neck and he'd been using one end to scrub at the back of his hair, but paused when his eyes met yours.
"Why do you look so surprised? It's just me." He asked, lowering the towel and raising a brow at your frozen figure.
"You're back," you answered, quite dumbly in fact.
"I live here. And we have the whole-" he gestured vaguely at everything you'd set up and had yet to put away, "Celebration thing for you internship thing."
"Yeah, but... you're actually gonna celebrate it with me." His brows furrowed, a frown creeping onto his face at the baffled way you said it.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Oh, well, no, because I thought- I just-" it took you a second to kick your brain back into gear and unfreeze long enough to spit out a coherent sentence. "I didn't know if you really would. Not to be rude but... you don't have the best track record when it comes to going through with plans."
"What?" His expression soured for a moment, voice dipping low and biting. It lasted for all but a second as he clearly forced himself to relax. 
Daiki stepped into the room, dumping his bag on a nearby chair before moving closer to you. His steps were heavy but they didn't thunder as he approached you. A faint smell of sweat drifted from him and you're suddenly reminded of how, despite his complex with the sport since high school, he continued to play and practice.
"I'm here, aren't I?" In a few strides he stood toe to toe with you, your neck aching from how far back you had to pull your head in order to look up at him. "No way I'd miss something you talked my ear off about all morning."
"That's because it means a lot to me."
"That's why I'm here."
There was a moment where the two of you stared at one another in silence. The deep blue of his eyes glinted under the lamplight, sharp enough to cut. His gaze was intense enough that you needed to fight the urge to take a step back. It felt like electricity snapping and dancing across your skin with the way it prickled under the full weight of his attention.
To help diffuse some of the charged energy in the room, you let a nervous chuckle slip out and poke playfully at his stomach. Though it clearly did nothing when it felt like poking straight concrete.
"I thought you'd say something like 'the only one who can tell me when to do things is me.'" You chuckled weakly at yourself,  pitching your voice a bit lower to mimic his voice. His eye twitched and it's all the warning you get before he moves.
His fingers reached out to glide along your jawline and settled gently on your cheek. Not a caress, but similar enough to it that your breath hitched at the touch. He bent down to be as level with you as his monstrous height allowed him to be. 
There was no escaping the oceanic chasm in his eyes, swallowing in the sight of you and holding you firmly in place. A soft smirk played at his lips when he leaned in close, nose nearly brushing yours.
"The only thing that's more important to me than me, is you."
{Fin!} Thank you for reading ^o^/
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cloudcountry · 2 months ago
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a broken symbol ⤿ you bring toshinori out of his mind
comments: i have nothing to say...hello mha fandom...are we still here...
tags: sir nighteye is mentioned, fluff, established relationship, toshinori is whipped, retired toshinori, insecurities.
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These days, it doesn’t take much for Toshinori to collapse. He’s been retired for quite a while now but still helps out behind the scenes, always the hero even though he deserves nothing but rest. He ends up excusing himself from his work every hour, only to run to the nearest bathroom and crumple over the first drain he can reach.
His side flares up with pain and he clutches the flesh, feeling the stretched and scarred skin that caused his health to decline so rapidly as he hacks up far too much blood. Despite everything—the scar and the blood he spits up and the way he really doesn’t have a quirk anymore and the way he can’t maintain his muscular form even if he wanted to—he still works.
And at the end of the day, his gnarled, gangly form drags its way over to you, the person he is finally able to love just a little bit, because the public knows he is All Might and he is still very much a target, and he knows he can still protect you but he’d rather not have it come to that.
Each day was harder than the last, more taxing on his broken and battered body. Even simple tasks like getting out of bed were becoming difficult, the scars and residual pain a constant reminder of just how beaten he truly was.
Why were you with a man like him?
What could he give you, really? He wasn’t young anymore, nor was he muscular or flashy. He couldn’t give you the life you deserved, with a partner the same age as you, in top condition, ready to spoil you relentlessly. Instead you got a run down, broken man, his muscles and glory gone. The only thing he could possibly offer you was his smile.
(Not the well trained one for the press, or the one he saved for victims during and after he saved them. The one that only his colleagues and his students have seen, the awkward one that droops a little on the right, the one that makes his eyes shut with peace he hasn’t known in forever, the one that accompanies a nervous laugh.)
He doesn’t notice your presence when he steps through the front door, muttering a soft “I’m home,” as he takes his shoes off in the doorway. You stand there, waiting for him with a ladle in hand, a cute apron wrapped around you. Your touch feels like an anchor when it reaches him, brushing his snarled hair away from his eyes. You look so concerned and it punches him right in the gut, guilt seeping into his expression. He feels so frail in front of you, like a giant skinny bug. Why do you treat him so gently?
Toshinori’s heart squeezes. He doesn’t deserve you. He’s pathetic, a broken symbol of peace, a reminder that he couldn’t do more for the people he wanted to protect, for his Master who bet everything on him, for young Midoriya who looked up at him with stars in his eyes.
You ask him if he’s getting in his own head again. Your words swim around his skull, only barely making sense as he ducks his head, lanky arms pulling you into his chest and holding you close. He doesn’t cry, it’s rare that he ever does, but he doesn’t stop the single tear that falls down his cheek. You hug him back immediately, pressing your hands into his back, and it feels so soft and warm.
What did he do to deserve something—someone—as soft as this?
“You’ve done everything.” you scold, holding him a little tighter.
How can you sound so gentle even when berating him for being pathetic?
No, that’s not what you were doing. You were just loving him.
“You’ve saved millions. You fought for them for decades. You stopped All for One time and time again. You’ve saved the world over and over. You’ve built society from the ground up.” you reprimand him for each mean thought he has about him, piecing him together from the ashes of his legacy.
He doesn’t say anything, slumped over on your shoulder, taking in your words like they’re the softest, sweetest thing he’s heard his whole life.
Everyone else wanted All Might. He was so, so lucky to find the person who loved Toshinori.
“I understand that the world isn’t safe yet, and I get that you will always be a hero at heart. It’s one of the many things I love about you.” you pick and choose your words carefully, he can hear it in your tone, “This is the life you chose and I won’t try to take it away from you. Just let me support you. And for the sake of the world, stop being so harsh on yourself.”
As he gazes at you, he can’t help but think that his world has narrowed down considerably since he retired. He entrusted the Earth to his students and colleagues, putting blood, sweat, and tears into the staircase he built for them, just so they could reach the highest peak and succeed in protecting everyone they cared for. He is, no matter how he feels about it, just a man now. And his world became you a while ago.
It feels selfish for him to admit that to himself. He will never stop caring about the public, the people who put their hopes and dreams on his shoulders and allowed him to carry their burdens for him, but you’re the only one who has ever really taken his burdens.
Maybe it’s because he never allowed anyone else to. He holds you just a little bit tighter, memories of friends long gone who pleaded with him not to go flashing through his mind.
“You will always be a hero, love.” you sigh, brushing his cheek with the back of your hand, “You will forever be my hero. But right now, I want you to just be you.”
That’s right. He shudders in your arms, a remnant of what once was, but this remnant loves you with every shattered bit of him.
“Right.” he says, voice low and soft.
He hardly has the energy to say anything else, but he knows he doesn’t have to.
Not when it’s you.
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cantalouupe · 1 year ago
Note
having majorrrrrr itto brainrot …. thinking about size difference because you know this man is fucking huge …. he knows u r smaller than him and he tries to b gentle at first but he can’t for long!!!! he goes crazy rough like balls deep ….. and he’s so vocal, like babbling almost, just constantly telling u how good ur pussy feels on his cock while noting how good he’s fucking u….. mmmmmmmmmm i want this man SO BADLY LOLLLL
golly
nsfw!!! itto x gn!reader
giant cock itto, dirty talk?
You knew it would be like this—Itto was huge, towering over every single person he’s ever crossed paths with—and yet you still can’t believe just how big he really is. Despite having been fucked before, you felt like you were in the midst of your first time; unfamiliar, daunting territory. 
“There’s no way.” You scramble back on the bed, sheets bunching uncomfortably beneath you. Itto rubs his cock against you, pressing the head just until you gasp from the pressure. There would be no amount of prepping or foreplay to ever prepare you for this—he'd tried to train you to take more, first fucking one, two, three fingers in until you were squirming and needy, but comfortable. He was so big, though, so long and thick and intimidating in size that there would be nothing that could properly amount to it; he would carve out his own space inside you, fill you so deep that you’ll be able to feel him in your stomach. 
“Come on,” he encourages, voice taking on a desperate note, as though he couldn’t handle another second being outside you. He’s restrained himself well until this point, taking things slowly in fear of hurting you, lasting with only fevered grinding, touching, and kissing. This would open a door, a flood gate that would release all his built-up desires of bending you over any surface he can find, fucking you, breeding you.  
He brings his hand to your side, touch hot but reassuring, and you try your best to relax your body. When the tip pushes in you let out a curse, and a small, relieved whimper. He’s so thick, wide enough to make you feel like you were being split in two, but he doesn’t stop, not when he finally has you around him, smooth and inviting and tight around the new intrusion.   
“Almost all the way in,” he comments, eyes trained on the spot where he’s stretching you open. Inch by inch, until you can feel the presence of his hips close behind you, just shy of meeting the plush of your ass. 
“Shit, you’re-” He heaves out a breath, unable to find the words as his hand grabs the flesh of your cheek to spread it, “Shit.” 
Everything is still for a moment. He stays seated inside you, letting you grow used to the feeling of him, body clenching around him, brain fogged up from him around you, behind you, inside you. Through the haze, you hear his voice, and you’re sure that he’s ready to absolutely destroy you, as soon as you say to. 
“Look at that. I told you it would fit.” His large hand slips along your stomach, pressing down slightly. “Do you feel me in here?” 
You aren’t sure you can speak, so overwhelmed by him and all he was giving you. Itto doesn’t mind though, never minds having to fill the quiet with his talking, his hushed rambles and loud babbles of pleasure. He loved to talk, and he knew you loved to listen, so he talks, telling you how good you were, how perfect you felt, how he would fuck you next; all while slowly shifting his body, pulling out of you to then push back in, forming a steady, leisurely pace.  
“You’re never going to need anyone else after this,” he grunts, “only I will be able to satisfy you.”  
He tries to keep his thrusts gentle, but at the first show of movement from you, relaxing into your space below him and moaning with every stroke, he gives up restraint, letting himself fall into a frenzy. It was only a matter of time before he’d finally get to have you just how he wanted, and now that it’s here, you relish in it, letting him dig his nails into your hips and fuck you until your body felt like it was buzzing with electricity, each meeting of your hips a shock. 
Grown weak and shaky, your arms give out from under you, chest collapsing into the bed. As your body sinks further into the mattress, melting with the touch of his hands against you, your knees slip further apart, back arching further. Itto makes a desperate noise and doubles down on you, a silent promise to take you apart.  
“Perfect,” he growls. His voice paired with the wet squelch and the slap of skin on skin is an erotic dream come true, a symphony of sounds that you wish you could bottle and keep forever. How many times would you come before he reached his end? He didn’t seem the least bit tired, but you were already reaching that peak that you’ve been wanting, been waiting for. You would come soon, and he knew it, not letting up for even a moment, allowing you no time to think or speak or breathe. 
When he leans forward into your space you choke out a moan, a demonic sound that gets ripped from your throat as he brings himself closer to you. The angle changes, movement changing to a harsh rolling jerk of his hips, pressing deep inside over and over again. His hot panting breath can be felt against your hair and the side of your face, and you suddenly wish he had taken you on your back so you would have unrestricted access to his face; you want to see his face, what expression he was wearing as he fucked you into the mattress, and you wanted to kiss him, to let him claim your mouth with the same animalistic force he fucks you with.  
“Are you going to come like this? I know you’re getting close,” he speaks in a hurried voice, as if the words will run away if he doesn’t say them quick enough. “I can feel it. You're so perfect, the best fuck I’ve ever had. I knew you would feel this good; I’ve fucked my hand so many times while thinking of this.” 
There’s no way you’d make it out of this alive, not with him crowding close, hitting you so deep inside, murmuring filth while he does it. You’ll die from the heat, the molten lava flowing through you, burning you from the inside out. His voice gets garbled while you burst and melt away, nerves alight and body shaking; he talks you through it still, voice shaky while he says everything he thinks of, filter nonexistent. He tells you that he needs to see it again, to witness you coming on his cock, feel you shivering with the aftershocks of it. He won’t stop—can't stop—until he’s had his fill, and until you have nothing more to give. 
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sequinsmile-x · 4 months ago
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Aftertaste
Everything changes in an instant. The pleasant warmth she’d been feeling, the arousal burning in her veins, immediately replaced by ice, panic washing over her at the combination of the whiskey on his breath and the compliment that had once belonged to another man.
Emily has a panic attack.
-x-
Hi friends,
This is another one of those ideas that kind of came to me on a night when I couldn't sleep. (I'm currently doing the very grown up thing of buying my first home and the anxiety is crippling so your gal isn't sleeping.) So, welcome to another part of the insomnia chronicles.
Please let me know what you think <3
-x-
Words: 4.5k
Warnings: Trauma, PTSD, panic attack
Read over on Ao3, or below the cut
He was even softer than she thought he’d be. 
She’d known him long enough to have seen it. To see the tender way he treated his son, how he’d been the same with Haley during the few times Emily had seen them as a couple. For years she allowed herself the fantasy of how he’d be with her, how he’d be gentle in a way no one else would ever know she wanted or needed. He’d exceeded her expectations over the last few weeks, treating her like she was made of something precious but never tripping over into treating her like she was fragile. 
She already knew she was in love with him, had known it for much longer than she cared to admit even to herself, but she couldn’t say it yet. The words trapped in her chest, buried under the rubble of all those that came before him, all those who had helped forge the walls she’d built around herself, the tools first handed to her by her mother before she was old enough to understand. 
She can’t bring herself to let go of him, her arms wrapped around him from behind, her cheek pressed against his shoulder as he digs through his pockets for the key to his apartment. 
“You said Jack is with Jess tonight?” She murmurs, kissing him through his jacket, breathing in the comforting scent of him, the vibration of his response passing back from his chest into hers. 
“Yes, she’s bringing him home in the morning,” he replies, pushing the door open before he turns in her arms, his smile soft as he presses it against hers, his hands on her lower back as he spins them, gently pushing her into the apartment first, “He said he’s excited for breakfast with you tomorrow,” he kisses her cheek before he unwraps himself from around her to lock his front door, “I told him we’d go to that diner he likes.”
Emily smiles nervously, an uncharacteristic shake to it, “And you’re sure-”
“Em,” he says, cutting her off with an understanding grin. He’d assured her more than once that Jack loved her, that he always wanted to spend time with her, especially now she was his father’s girlfriend, “I think you’re his favourite person on the planet. He loves spending time with you.” 
She presses her lips together to try to contain her smile, her cheeks warm with love for both of them, “I love spending time with him too.”
He hums, his hands on her hips as he tugs her closer, “Just him?”
Her smile turns teasing, her tongue pressed against the back of her teeth as she shrugs, “You too I guess.” 
He swallows her yelp as he pulls her into a kiss, his hands moving to her back as they lose themselves in each other. When he breaks the kiss he rests his forehead against hers, “Drink?” 
She nods, her tongue peeking out to lick her lower lip, chasing the taste of him whilst he grabs her hand and leads her towards the couch. As soon as she’s sitting down he tries to move, his hand slipping out of hers, but she stops him, the thought of not touching him too much to bear. She kisses him, a hand on each of his cheeks as he leans over the couch, holding him in place as he boxes her in. She stamps another kiss against his lower lip as he pulls away, smiling as she nips at the plushness of it, “I’ll take that drink now.”
He smiles, his dimples forming under her touch, the perfect size for her thumbs to sit, and he nods, “Do you want anything in particular or shall I surprise you?” 
She hums as she lets him go, feeling oddly bereft when he steps away, leaving coolness in his place as he walks the short distance to the bar cart, “What have you got?” 
“Well, Dave got me some whiskey for my birthday last year that I’ve never opened,” he says, reaching past the bottles neatly lined up on the front of the cart, “It always seemed too nice to drink alone, but…”
She stops hearing him when he shows her the bottle. The red glass momentarily makes her freeze, and the small gold bird on the label pulls her back in time. Aaron’s deep honey-coloured eyes are briefly replaced with icy blue ones, a flash of the past in between blinks that makes her breath catch in her chest. 
“Em, are you okay?”
She swallows thickly and looks at him, already nodding before she’s really sure, “I’m fine,” she says as she forces a smile, carrying on before he can ask again, “That’s an expensive bottle. Dave must have dropped at least a $1,000 on it.” 
He nods as he pulls the tag in the red foil around the neck of the bottle, “He told me it was $1,150,” he smiles wryly, “He likes to tell me how expensive things are in an attempt to make me feel uncomfortable,” his smile gets wider as she laughs, some of the tension in her chest easing, “I didn’t know you knew anything about speciality whiskeys.” 
Her mouth goes dry, her tongue heavy as she tries and fails to think of a way to respond. She didn’t know about whiskey, not really, but she knew this one. It was Ian’s favourite, something she was sure had everything to do with the price tag attached to it rather than the taste of the liquor itself. He’d always loved the finer things in life, always wanted the most expensive looking thing possible to improve his image. She knew she had counted as one of those things. It was why he’d bought her only the best clothes, never asking once if she liked any of them before he presented her with them, dressing her up as if she belonged to him. 
The scar on her chest aches, burning as if it were fresh, the smell of charred flesh briefly filling her senses before Aaron sinks on the couch next to her, passing her one of the glasses in his hand - a generous measure of whiskey in each. 
“Thanks,” she says, smiling as she takes it, staring at the amber liquid, “You know, I would have been happy with a normal $40 bottle of whiskey. They all taste the same over that price point anyway.” 
“I know,” he replies as he leans in to kiss her, the scent of his cologne washing over her, replacing anything else as she sinks into it, turning so she curls into his side, her hand on his thigh. His eyebrows knit together as he pulls back, a flicker of concern thrumming under his skin as she practically clings to him, her grip on his leg tight, “Are you sure you’re okay?” 
She nods, watching as he takes a swig of his drink, her gaze fixed on his Adam's apple when it shifts as he swallows. She doesn’t want to get into it, doesn’t want Ian to ruin what had been a perfect date with her boyfriend by bringing him up, his presence already having inevitably wormed into their very first one just a few weeks ago when Aaron saw her naked for the first time. He swore he only saw her, his touch gentle and kind as he skimmed his fingers over her scars. She hadn’t believed him until he took off his shirt and she saw his, Foyet the furthest thing from her mind as she took in how beautiful he was. 
She’s moving before she thinks about it, grabbing the glass from him and placing it down with hers on the coffee table. Before he can question what she’s doing she’s straddling him, her knees bracketing his hips as she sinks into his lap. She wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him before he can say anything else, sighing contentedly when he wraps his arms around her, his fingertips from his spanned-out hands almost touching each other over her spine.  She can taste the whiskey on his tongue but it’s chased by him, the final notes of it something she was already used to and aching to have for the rest of her life. 
He encourages her upwards, his hands squeezing her hips as they stand together, moving in tandem as he ends up behind her, his chest against her back, “Bedroom.” 
She’s so focused on him, on the way his palm is warm through the material of her dress, on his lips pressing against her collarbone, that she simply nods in response. Sure her voice would give away how much she wanted him, her desire lodged in her throat. When they make it to his room he turns her, his touch gentle yet insistent as he tugs her dress over her head, his pupils blown wide as he looks her up and down. 
“Beautiful,” he mumbles, the word half pressed against her lips as he encourages her backwards, the back of her knees hitting the bed as he guides her down, his hands on her back as she arches up into him, “So beautiful.” 
She’d always been complimented on her appearance. It started before she was old enough to understand the currency of it. Men her mother was friends with telling her she was pretty before she knew how her face and her body would be both something she could weaponise as well as something that could be used against her. Ian had always called her gorgeous. The word spat out amongst curse words whenever they fucked, the compliment she’s sure he meant lost somewhere along the way. 
Aaron always called her beautiful. It made her skin flush, warmth spreading from her cheeks down her neck whenever he said it, and something about the way he looked at her made her believe him every time. A sense of awe shining back at her as if he was looking at a piece of priceless art in a museum, hidden behind glass she’d placed in front of herself after one too many people had tried to ruin her. 
She smiles and pulls him in for a kiss, spreading her legs so he can settle between them, the weight of him against her as much of a comfort as anything else. She hooks a leg around him, smirking as their kiss breaks and he ruts his hips against hers, her teeth sinking into her lower lip as their eyes meet, 
“Do you like the lingerie?” She asks, even though she knows the answer, the heavy weight of him against her hip obvious even through his pants, “I bought it for you.” 
He growls at the admission as he looks her up and down, taking in the forest green lace cupping her breasts and hugging her hips, and pride pulses through her. The fact she could do this to him, the most controlled man she’d ever met, enough to make her burst. He leans in, his kiss more passionate this time, forceful in a way that makes her moan, and she holds him closer. He pulls back just enough to speak, his breath skipping across her face. 
“You’re gorgeous.” 
Everything changes in an instant. The pleasant warmth she’d been feeling, the arousal burning in her veins, immediately replaced by ice, panic washing over her at the combination of the whiskey on his breath and the compliment that had once belonged to another man. She can smell smoke and fear and burned flesh and she feels herself folding inwards, her chest collapsing as Aaron’s weight above her is suddenly oppressive. She’s brought back the moment he kisses her neck, a shiver passing through her for all the wrong reasons as she shies away from it, her hands forceful on his shoulders, her foot now pushing at his hip, as she tries to get free. 
“Stop,” she chokes out, her voice sounding nothing like her own, “Aaron, stop.” 
She needn’t have asked the second time, he was already moving, but she does. She barely looks at him as she scrambles off the bed, her chest tight as she tries to breathe. 
“Em? Are you okay? What’s wrong?” 
She ignores his questions and looks for an exit, her eyes land on the door to the en-suite and she’s moving before she can think about it, her legs carrying her of her own accord. She slams the door shut behind her and locks it, the heavy wood muffling his continued attempts to talk to her. She turns and leans against it, her head hitting it with a heavy thunk before she sinks to the floor, the cool tile against her ass and thighs a stark reminder she was only wearing her lingerie. 
She hugs her legs to her chest and rests her forehead on her knees as she encourages herself to breathe. 
“Em?” 
A shaky breath rattles in her chest, “Aaron.”
She can hear how it sounds as close to begging as she’s ever come to with him, desperation laced into every syllable. She knows he hears it too as he replies, his voice soft and even as if he’s purposely trying to make himself small to not intimidate her, even through the door. 
“I’m not going to force my way in or make you talk to me, I just need to know if you’re hurt, sweetheart.” 
Guilt swells in her chest, the fear and concern leaking from him makes its way to the door between them, causing it to swell and warp to the point she’s briefly worried she’ll never get out, stuck on this side of the space she’s forced between them.
She swallows thickly, “I’m not hurt.” 
There’s a beat of silence that draws out around her, almost long enough that she thinks he’s left until he speaks, “I’ll leave something for you to wear out here. I’ll be in the living room when you’re ready.” 
She doesn’t respond, doesn’t know how to, his kindness almost cutting, making her feel worse for a reaction to something she hadn’t known would trigger her. She doesn’t know how long she sits there on his bathroom floor, the coolness of the tile against her skin something she hangs on to, an anchor in reality, as she reminds herself that Ian is gone. She’d watched him die. That he’d lost and she’d won and now she had this. A man she knew loved her even though neither of them had said it yet. A man who had looked devastated at the thought of hurting her, his pained expression something she’d caught even in the height of her panic. 
She eventually scrambles off of the floor, her legs slightly shaky beneath her, and she unlocks the door and steps out into the bedroom. She walks over to the bed and sees her discarded dress folded neatly next to a pair of his boxers and her favourite shirt of his. It makes her ache that he’s given her options even in this - the comfort of him or herself - when he doesn’t understand what has happened. She slips on his clothes, taking the time to bury her face against the collar of his shirt, breathing him in, letting it wash over her before she leaves the bedroom. 
He’s sitting on the couch when she makes it to the living room, the bottle of whiskey no longer on the table, hidden away back in it’s place on the bar cart. The glasses are gone too, and she spots them on the draining board. She briefly wonders if he drank any more of the whiskey, but then she smells the coffee in the air and then she sees the half drunk mug of it in front of him. She can picture him cleaning to keep himself busy whilst she sat on his bathroom floor, spurred on by worry for her that stopped him from sitting still, deciding to make coffee that she hopes is decaf just to pass more time. 
He looks over at her, his elbows resting on his knees. He looks wrung out, stress painted into the fine lines on his face, and she watches as he tries to force himself to relax, rolling his shoulders as he tries to shrink his frame. She blows out a breath and walks over, the cuffs of his shirt wrapped around her hands as she sits on the coffee table, his knees bracketing hers as she wraps her arms around herself, her mouth opening and closing a few times before she finds the words she’s looking for.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, “I…I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head and his hand twitches, reaching out for her before he stops himself, his hand forming a fist by his side, “You have nothing to apologise for, Em,” he says, his voice rough, “I just…what happened?” 
She knows if she said she didn’t want to talk about it that he’d drop it, that he’d let it go at least for now, and for a moment she’s tempted. Old habits that died hard calling her back, the empty promises the always offered her a lure she could never quite say no to, somehow never learning that the loneliness they brought weren’t worth the independence they gave her. She shakes it off because she doesn’t want to do that. She wants to tell him, wants him to know this part of her, to let him learn with her the parts of the new version of herself with her. 
She reaches out and grabs his hand, smiling softly as she links their fingers together, “I need you to understand this wasn’t your fault,” she starts with, squeezing his hand tighter when he frowns before he forces a tight nod, “The whiskey?” She says, biting the inside of her cheek, “It was Ian’s favourite. He drank it most nights.” 
Aaron’s hand loosens it grip on hers, the his shoulders slump no longer a conscious attempt to make himself small and unimposing, but his natural reaction to causing her any kind of discomfort. 
“Em,” he breathes out, her name like oxygen he can’t afford to lose as he shakes his head, “Why didn’t you tell me before I opened it? I never would have-”
“I know,” she assures him, wrapping both of her hands around his, “I know, but I didn’t think it would…” she presses her lips together and shakes her head, “I didn’t know that would happen.” She almost doesn’t tell him the rest of it, his reaction to just the whiskey itself enough to break her heart, to cause fractures he had healed to split back open. She knows she has to if she wants this to work, that she doesn’t want to put either of them in this position again, “He…he always called me gorgeous when we were…” she closes her eyes, embarrassment she knows she shouldn’t feel colouring her cheeks, “When we had sex. He’d always call me that. And-”
“I called you gorgeous,” he says, only remembering that he had as she says it, something he’d mumbled against her skin in the heat of the moment.
She nods, her gaze meeting his again, “I think that mixed in with the smell of the whiskey triggered something in my brain,” she hates that she can feel tears burning in her eyes, that this makes her feel so vulnerable in front of a man she’d already been intimate with, but she doesn’t try and stop it, disconnecting one of her hands from around his to wipe her cheek as the tears fall. 
“Sweetheart, I am so sorry,” he rasps, sounding close to tears himself, and she moves forward, sitting on the edge of the table so her knees are jammed up against the couch, her forehead against his, the last bit of tension in her chest dissipating at the smell of coffee on his breath, “I didn’t know.”
“You have nothing to apologise for, honey,” she assures him, “I didn’t know that was going to happen, so how could you?”
He kisses her forehead, the first time he’s touched her of his own accord since she’d walked into the living room, and then he pulls her as close as he can in the strange embrace they’d found themselves in, “We know now.” 
She smiles softly at the firmness in his tone, as if he was determined to remove the word gorgeous from his vocabulary entirely and swear he’d never drink expensive whiskey again. 
She captures his lips in a quick kiss, “Yeah, we know now,” she kisses him again before she stands, encouraging him backwards until she can sit in his lap, her knees on either side of his hips, a position they’d been in just before this all started. Instead of initiating a kiss she curls herself up, her cheek against his chest as she wraps herself around him, intent on being as close as possible. “Thank you for…stopping so quickly,” she says, her smile tight as she pulls away just enough to look up at him, unsure why she feels something close to embarrassed, “I appreciate it.” 
He frowns, the line between his eyebrows so deep she can’t help but reach out and soothe it, her thumb pressed against the bridge of his nose, “You don’t have to thank me for that.”
She thinks she somehow falls even more in love with him because of how incredulous he looks, and she stops herself from telling him, already feeling far too exposed for one evening, “Aaron, honey, you remember what we do for a living right?” She runs her fingers through his hair, “Not everyone stops.” 
He tightens his hold on her, questions she knows he won’t ask now pressed against her skin through the thin material of the shirt that she is wearing, “If there is ever anything else…” he says, his jaw tight, a ripple of self hatred passing through it, “You’ll tell me?” 
She nods pushing her fingers through his hair again, “Unless you take up smoking and dealing in the illegal weapons trade, I think we’ll be okay,” she jokes, her smile faltering when his lips barely twitch with it, the heaviness of what had happened dragging the corners of it down, “I’ll tell you,” she assures him, her lips catching the edge of his jaw as she leans in, determined to remove the tension from it, “I promise.” 
He kisses the top of her head, holding her close, touching her like she was made of glass, “Shall we get some sleep?” 
She knows this isn’t the end of this, that there is more to discuss beyond what had happened tonight, things they still had to learn about each other, but for now she wants it to be over. Wants to fall asleep in his arms, her face pressed against his neck. Comforted by the knowledge that even if her blue eyed monster visited her in her dreams, the smell of whiskey and danger the harbinger she may never truly be free from, that she’d wake up to Aaron and the love he gave her so freely. A debt she’d always repay without question, taking it in turns to be each other’s solid ground. 
“Yeah,” she says, kissing him, “Let’s get some sleep.” 
___
When she wakes up in the morning, she’s alone in bed, the coolness of the sheets only improved by the smell of him lingering on them. 
She wanders out into the apartment, bleary eyed and confused when it’s cold, every window open and letting in the cool morning air. She finds him in the kitchen, the now empty whiskey bottle disappearing from view almost immediately as he throws it into the recycling bin, the thick, expensive glass thunking against the bottom of it. She understands now why he’d opened all the windows in the early spring, the usual warmth of his apartment nowhere to be found. He hadn’t wanted her to smell the liquor in the air, had made sure to remove every reminder of it and she knew if she hadn’t woken up when she had he would have taken the recycling out too. 
“Aaron,” she exclaims, her eyes wide as he turns to look at her, unaware she’d even walked into the room, the sound of the street outside having drowned out her footsteps, “That was worth over $1,000.” 
She isn’t sure why she’s saying it, her gaze still fixed on the now empty bottle, the red neck of it peeking out from the recycling. She only realises he’s in front of her when he hooks his thumb under her chin, encouraging her to look up at him. 
“I don’t care about that,” he says, sounding so sure she can’t think of one reason to argue with him, “I care about you. I never want to…” 
He trails off, his hands tight on her hips as they migrate there as if magnetised, and she nods, wrapping her arms around his neck, her body pressed against his, seeking out his warmth in the cold, “I know,” she replies, stamping her lips against his, “I…thank you.”
It’s not lost on her that he’s thrown away something that was a gift, something he’d kept in the back of his bar cart for a special occasion, and that he’d done it without a second thought. So sure of her, of them, that he hadn’t considered anything else. 
“You don’t have to thank me, sweetheart,” he says, his eyebrows furrowed as if it was ridiculous, as if it wasn’t one of the kindest things anyone had ever done for her, past partner’s resistance to even pick up a box of tampons for her on their way home even more absurd than before, “It’s what you do for someone you lo…”
She fights a smile when he trails off, catching himself before he says it, panic she finds adorable flashing in his eyes. She kisses him, drawn forward as she cups the back of his head, holding him in place when she breaks the kiss. Her nose nudging against his as she says the thing that suddenly didn’t feel as revealing any more. Empowerment found in three words that she once saw only vulnerability in. 
“I love you.” 
His smile is answer enough, but he says it back, the words skipping across her skin as he repeats them, the smell of fresh coffee and her future lingering on his breath as he presses his lips against hers. 
77 notes · View notes
angelstate · 11 months ago
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InfatuatedBoyfriend!Konig x Wandering!Reader.
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InfatuatedBoyfriend!Konig who holds you dearly in his heart, has never loved anything or anyone as much as he loves you. You are the epitome of his existence, the sole reason he wakes up every day and doesn’t dread the passing of time, the getting older, the living a fulfilling life outside of the battlefield, away from violence and death.
and he doesn’t think you know the extent his love goes for you, he doesn’t think you are aware of just how deeply he feels for you to the point sometimes the pressure in his heart from all the love he has for you makes him feel like his chest it’s about to burst. 
you love him, he knows you do. And it feels like being loved by a God, like the creator of his purpose in life is continuously reinforcing he is living correctly, how he is meant to live, and it’s as gratifying as it is scary because there is so much to life and all he sees is you. and he knows he would die a happy man only having met you, but he fears your gaze won’t meet enough places and be amazed by enough things to feel as fullied as he feels when looking at you.
you have an insatiable sense of wonder and he knows he (as big as he is) isn’t enough to satiate your senses, and your eyes will continue to fall onto everything that calls out to you to be discovered, it’s never other people, but is things, places, is everything, is nothing. 
InfatuatedBoyfriend!Konig sometimes can't help but overthink, finding himself imagining that maybe one day, without even meaning to, you will meet someone else, someone more fitting, someone as outgoing as you are, someone who doesn’t have social anxiety and feels electrifying fear every time he has to enter crowded places.
He fears that “inevitable” day as much as he feared the dark when he was a kid. Irrationally hard yet so ground-shaking it torns to shreds every piece of bravery he built when the lights were on, When you are in his arms. 
And then, you come back to him, you always do. Like a catholic person always finds a way into their church, like Virgin Mary memorized her way into his son’s tomb for years after his death. you love him and you come back every day out of devotion for him. He can’t help but ask why you do, Why do you come back to him? why not let your eyes wander and find someone who has the same excitement to discover the world as you do, he truly doesn't understand yet sighs in relief at your continuous presence.
“Love you, kö” he hears you whisper next to him, the room dark yet the light in your eyes still visible, even in the darkness you find a way to shine and observe what doesn’t want to be seen, are you the most beautiful human being to ever exist. “I love you too” he mutters, voice shaky, because he loves you so much that the word “love” falls short, it isn’t quantifying enough to summarize his feelings for you, he feels sorry there isn’t a word fitting to tell you how he feels.
“Sleep well, kö” Your voice slowly fades, quieter and slower but you managed to wish him a good night's rest, aren’t you just so lovely, so caring even when falling into unconsciousness, even in your fading awakeness having him in mind “Schlaf gut” (sleep well) he whispers, not wanting to disturb you.
InfatuatedBoyfriend!Konig doesn’t sleep much when he’s with you, too busy breathing in your smell, the warmth of your arm wrapped around his waist and the heaviness of your head on his chest keeping his heartbeat erratic with love. it borderlines as an obsession about your presence and existence around him.
He perceives you in ways that make him feel at ease, you are what he lacks. you are everything he could’ve been if life had been kinder, and he is everything that you could’ve become if life hadn’t been kind. It’s a difference so parallel he feels like he shouldn’t be capable of touching you.
It feels sinful for someone like him, with hands stained with people’s blood to touch someone like you, with hands pristine from the violence you have never committed. He holds the pureness in which you live like one of the most prized parts of you he guards.
InfatuatedBoyfriend!Konig knows he isn’t a holy man, and has never stepped into a church after killing someone for the first time, not wanting to bring his sins into a place too holy to forgive him, he knows he doesn’t deserve forgiveness for what he’s done.
Yet, he still dreams of marrying you, of you in a white dress, walking towards the altar where he awaits for you, ready to vow his life and soul to you, even till death do the two of you apart. Because if the afterlife exists, he knows he’ll love you then and in whatever comes next.
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sweetiewrites · 1 year ago
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𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙘'𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙤𝙗𝙞𝙚
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𝙎𝙔𝙉𝙊𝙋𝙎𝙄𝙎: the sfw abc's of hobie!
𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂: mostly just fluff !!! gender neutral reader !!!
𝘼𝙐𝙏𝙃𝙊𝙍𝙎 𝙉𝙊𝙏𝙀: i just decided to answer all of them because uhm uhh i got a lot of asks for them and i dont feel like answering them individually (´ ε ` )♡
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A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) hobie is a super affectionate partner. if you two are together he usually wants to have some kind hand on you or arm around you; kisses are literally his weakness. he also shows affection through acts of service so expect him to do literally anything and everything for you.
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) hobie is a great best friend. he's one of the types that says they'll do anything for you and genuinely means it. he would do just about anything for his friends and most of his friendships start because he's at shows causing trouble.
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?) oh my goodness hobie is a cuddle monster. he loves cuddling and any time you ask him to cuddle he will happily do so. also he isn't really picky on how you two cuddle, big spoon, little spoon; just touch him please.
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) being a spider person (and a punk star) hobie will never really properly settle down. the closes he gets is more falling into a comfortable routine (and even that's difficult). hobie cooks decently well. it's not the best food you've ever had but he definitely tries. cleaning for him kinda falls off the way side just because he can be pretty busy with life.
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) honest and open conversation. hobie would sit them down and have a conversation with them about it. above all else he appreciates genuineness so there wouldn't be any built up resentment, or miscommunication or anything like that. for a break up it's very not dramatic on his part.
F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) hobie feels like marriage isn't needed when you're committed to someone already. he's ready to commit with you, but the only reason he would really want to get married is for tax benefits.
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) despite popular opinion (and appearance); hobie is actually a big gentle giant. physically whenever he holds you it's always very sweet and soft and emotionally he's very in touch with other peoples feelings. unless he doesn't like you then he's pretty soft and sweet.
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) hobie is the best hugger alive. i don't care what anyone says. he gives the best hugs and they're so gentle yet so reassuring. hobie doesn't usually hug his friends it's usually reserved for you (partner) so whenever you want a hug or he's feeling particularly touch starved he's hugging you so much.
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) it takes him a very long time to say it. he has a lot of conflicting feelings on that word and most of his affection is non verbal. so when he finally does say i love you then it's an event that should be celebrated.
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) ehh... hobie is not the jealous type despite popular belief. he's very confident that if someone is flirting with you then you'll tell them to fuck off and he doesn't really compare himself to people.
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?) amazing. hobie's kisses are just amazing. each one is filled with passion even if it's just a little peck. his lips are nice and full and that lip ring is perfect. hobie's favourite place to kiss you (besides your lips) would be your neck, he's always planting kisses on your neck. his favourite place to be smooched is his knuckles.
L = Little ones (How are they around children?) we've all seen it. he's great with children. the best uncle/god parent.
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) hobie is not a morning person in the slightest. most of his mornings are spent holding you and listening to the radio (if you have a phone he's watching youtube). he isn't even that interested in breakfast, his appetite doesn't pick up till later in the day around lunch time. morning's are especially lazy.
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) on the other hand, hobie is a night person. if he isn't being spider man than he's usually exploring the city, going to show, putting on shows, making music or working on his own projects on the houseboat. hobie is most active during the night so hopefully you'll stay up with him or at the very least you'll snuggle up to him in the night.
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) hobie drops pieces of lore about himself very randomly. he's not an open book in the slightest so he'll know everything about you long before you know things about him. the key is don't rush him to open up, ask questions if you're interested, and pay attention to what he does say.
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) he doesn't get angry easily at all. there are very few things that will make him angry. usually when he's upset it's because of grander things like the government or society, not usually at individual people. he's a very patient man.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) hobie remembers everything about you, literally every little detail. he can be quite forgetful, but when it comes to you it sticks to his head like glue.
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?) the first time you spent the night on his houseboat. he still remembers you snuggled up to him, your arms latched around his body. he remembers it so vividly because he's never had someone spend the night in his bed before (gwen tried and she promptly got kicked to the couch), but you just fit so naturally into his life that he had no problems sleeping with you.
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) if you're a spider person he isn't too protective but if you're not then he's kinda always on edge around you. hobie attracts trouble and he's well aware of that so he's kinda always ready to fight for you if need be. and hobie doesn't need to be protected but he does feel appreciated when you get a little over protective; it's cute and he feels special.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) SO MUCH EFFORT. my god, sometimes his date plans are chill but usually since he doesn't want to spend too much money he's doing everything from scratch and he's making the things that need to be made on his own. even if it's just a picnic he's doing his absolute best to make everything absolutely perfect.
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?) there are so many. hobie always forgets to do dishes, not to the point where it'll create mold or maggots but he just doesn't remember. if there's a partner that will clean while he cooks or vice versa than it'll balance out.
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) not too vain. he cares about his appearance to the capacity of he wants to look good for himself. his piercings, clothing style, hair, all of it is for himself. also he knows he looks hot.
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?) no not necessarily. hobie doesn't believe in people completing each other, you should be whole enough to stand on your own. that isn't to say he wouldn't be incredibly depressed if something happened to you.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.) hobie is so queer coded to me. he chooses not to label himself (obviously), but he would date anyone regardless of gender or sex as long as your morals align.
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?) a partner that expects him to change who he is as a person or change his morals, don't try to pressure him into being someone he's not. also loyalty, if you're disloyal that's a huge ick.
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) his sleeping schedule is erratic, but when he's gotten into a rhythm he stays up late and he wakes up late. he likes to hold things when he's sleeping even before he met you so he may have a stuffed animal or two. even though you're not supposed to he loves eating a big meal before he sleeps.
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