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â LONELY IS THE MUSE!
â ABBY!CENTRIC ONE SHOT â
feat. bodyguard!abby x famous actor!reader
warnings. eighteen+, suggestive nsfw content: reader fell first nd and abby fell harder, some angst, fluff, slightly coded fem reader, personal trainer!abby, just two idiots pining. i saw the discourse for some romance and i wanted to do my part. enjoy friends.
LONELY IS THE MUSE, entangled in an endless web of a high profile life, everyone waiting on you hand and foot, hollywoodâs star in their prime â everyone needing a piece for themselves. yet the mysterious blonde who has not a clue to who you are catches the eye of the lonely muse.
wc. 8k
âYou know you donât have to stand this close to me.â Abby counters, but her words didnât make you move an inch. Not that she really thought they would. Secretly, she enjoys your gentle touch. She likes how comfortable you feel around her. The downpour in New York has your arm entangled with her own, your hand gripping her bicep as she holds the umbrella.
âMaybe, but I donât want to ruin my hair.â You replied gently, as you rested your head against her relaxed bicep.
âGod, forbid your hair be in ruin, sweet girl.â Abbyâs wet lips look inviting, especially when sheâs smirking at you. Delectable, enticing, desired seeping underneath your soul as you try your best to keep them at bay.Â
âNow that would be positively tragic, wouldnât it? Just a paparazziâs wet dream. Need my hair in ruins for them to get a handsome payday.â Abby shakes her head, the budding smile threatening to reveal itself. You can see how it grows, despite the effort she makes to disguise it.Â
âI think you do enjoy my company. Paid or not, I bring some light into your life.â You play with the ends of her hair. The blonde feels a tingle pricking at her skin. She ignores it.Â
âI can see that smile.âÂ
Better than anyone, Abby knows the gleam in your eyes is too dangerous to entertain, so she looks forward. Itâs what she's paid to do, to keep you safe. Not to entertain some weird crush that will soon pass when you move on to the next actress, artist, or producer. She doesnât need a reminder of how different your world is, sheâs already abundantly clear on where the both of you stand. Worlds apart from each other, even if youâre leaning against her, the greedy hands of the public grab onto you first, mercilessly sucking the life out of anyone who enters your life.Â
All it does is isolate you, making your life incredibly lonely. Trapped on the throne you built with your raw talent, but the industry is a double edged sword, as much as it appears to lift you up, it impales any sense of normalcy at a private, peaceful life. You take pride in these little moments you have with her. Itâs the only time you get to have a taste of normalcy, even if you did have a bodyguard, which wasnât entirely normal. Yet, Abby is a gentle reminder of a life she wishes to have. Someone who is kind, and loving; a soul that exists for no selfish gain, greed, or selfishness.Â
Sometimes, you take advantage of it.Â
Abby knows you crave physical affection. Ever since your messy break up, youâve been finding any little excuse to justify it. Abby didnât really mind at all. Even if she tried to deny it in her head, sheâd miss it if you stopped. The incessant need you have to be close to her at all times, your essence bleeding on to her, suffocating her with everything she wants, but knows she canât ever let herself dip into the deepest edges of you.Â
Especially, not when you are still attempting to decode the wreckage of your last relationship.Â
Abby hates seeing you like this, but she knew there was little she could do to help. All she could do is let you ride the wave of heartbreak, take in the silent tears hitting full cheeks, and hope it would all end soon for you. For now, she would allow immediate proximity.
Youâre hurting. You need it. Â
The first few weeks, even a couple months after, she expects it. Now itâs month four, and you were still touching her all the time. Lame excuses falling from your lips daily and Abby was sure you didnât even believe them. She thought about bringing it up to you, establishing healthy boundaries before she crosses a line.
Yet, it feelsâŠnice.
It felt good to be needed. The reason she had taken this job in the first place. It wasnât what she had imagined for herself â a bodyguard of a famous musician. She jokes about it now, but it's a twisted fate for the two of you. Your eyes shine bright whenever someone asks, and you always take the lead.
Abby has always been more reserved, and your personality is as bright as the sun. She liked Abby the second she laid eyes on her. Not because she was beautiful or the most gorgeous human sheâd ever seen.
Which she is.
No.
Her stupid pounding heart, the one she felt beating violently out of her chest, loves you, has no idea who she is. She had thought possibly the blonde stranger was putting on a front, some did. They liked to conceal their intentions behind greedy eyes and malicious intent.
But Abby turned out to be different.
When a blossoming friendship turned into a job opportunity, it took Abby through a loop. It was the very last thing she was expecting from you. Youâd kept her in the dark and when you announced exactly who you were, Abby really didnât know. Never was she really a fan of social media, didnât really partake in it unless someone was showing her the latest trend going around. Sheâs a little old fashioned but she likes it. It worked in her favor when it came to you. Unknowingly, for the first time since your fame struck as quick as lightning, you had the pleasure to befriend someone who had no idea who you were.Â
As fresh as breathing your first breath of air, you took pride in the circumstance. Someone enjoying your company for who they are and not just for your social standing, fame, or most importantly the money. Before either of you could really even fully come to it, Abby has become such an influential person in your life, and then you were attempting to entice her with a job opportunity, and she accepted.Â
You thought it would take longer and knew from the moment you had asked. But her life was uprooted by you, and she felt guilty about how much it fills her up with glee.Â
In the last year, Abby became the only person worthy of your trust, the only one who would keep your confessions confined, not letting the secrets drip like cheap wine down the drain. Rather more as if she was out in the vineyard, carefully hand picking the grapes for the wine as she crafts it herself. Giving it the love, care, and attention it needs to flourish into fine beverage. From one sip alone, knowing she would crave for the taste.Â
Getting to know you in ways some would dream of. Often, the mass of the public did, but youâre more selective who you let in your life now. Swiftly, you noticed how easily Abby listened.Â
Listening and seeing you for who you are, not some strewed version the media made you out to be. Â
She understood why you felt the need to and maybe why you felt comfortable with her. You spent time with her more than anyone. After two years together, she had learned every little detail about you. Where you liked to get your morning coffee, your favorite brunch spot, which bar you like to frequent when you had a night to give, which gym was your favorite, and to not speak with you until youâve had said coffee.Â
Itâs these little things Abby remembers, constantly getting her in trouble.
When paparazzi are around, you always accept her hand as she guides you through the swarming crowd. Abby knows you despise it. How inhumane it makes you feel. You feel like an attraction, an object the masses had come to see rather than being viewed as an actual person. In these moments, you cling onto Abby the most. While sheâs intimidating to all, there leaves a small exception for you, never has she once been anything to you more than just a sweet, gentle giant she wants close to her at all times.Â
Her stature is standing a little over six feet tall. Her arms always looked too good against the tight fabric of her shirt. The one you grip onto as she is navigating through a crowd with you in tow, sheâs always focused. The remainder of your team was behind you, while she was always in front of you.
At all times, protecting you.
But it was moments like today, you were grateful for. You blended with the hectic life of the city. You were just two people waiting at a crosswalk, waiting to get to your next destination.
Abby tries not to pay too much attention to how youâre squeezing her bicep, with a strong grip further indication you werenât letting go anytime soon.
She supposes itâs better than feeling your hand in hers. There were times when Abby deemed it necessary. She would grab it whenever she needed to get you through from point a to point b, quickly. It made you follow her pace instead of lingering behind. She didnât even know how she was supposed to feel with your head resting against her arm, your body so close to hers.
How was she supposed to act normally?
The rumors were already getting bad. You denied them when asked, and you did gracefully each time.
All Abby could think about if this moment was captured, it would be perceived as intimate. It felt like it was, but she didnât want the entire world to see. Not when she felt the two of you walking this very nimble line of friends, something professional, and something more. She didnât need thousands of eyes giving their two senses in a situation she didnât even fully understand yet. All it took was one person to snap a photo if she gets too close to you. If her touch stayed on you for too long, or if she let the love reach her eyes. The ladder was the most difficult to control. Itâs a part of her just as much as the air in her lungs.
This life is new to her. At times, Abby wondered if sheâs biting off more than she could chew.
The only reason sheâd left was for you. She had a small, quiet life. Abbyâs life was very average, a cloud of normalcy hovered above her before the two of you met. A personal trainer full time and she resided in a cabin about half an hour from where she worked. She chopped wood to relieve stress, Her girlfriend liked it at the time, and she did too. She had her two dogs, and a darling kitten.Â
She enjoyed the privacy. The isolated countryside her sweet family could reside in. Abby had built this life she was proud of, and it made her happy. For a time, it worked. She was genuinely content with where she was. There wasnât a need to stress or control where her life was going. It felt like a huge relief. She tended to live inside her own head, not be present in what she has right in front her.
It had been months since she felt like that. Itâd felt good and she was proud of herself for not succumbing from within and really coming to terms with what she had built around her. This was the most difficult route for her to take. To allow herself to be open, even if there was a chance of her falling.
Abby really should have felt remorseful for leaving it all behind.
Nora was sweet. The most caring partner she ever had, but there wasnât much she could compare it to. Besides her, there had only been two, and she didnât even count Owen. A long misstep until she landed where she needed to be. He did care for her, and he seemed to be more kind-hearted than most men, but the bar was set so low, he shouldâve exceeded expectations.
And he did, in some areas.
Others, he fell more than flat but there was little to nothing he could do about it. Abby likes girls and he wasnât one. Her sexuality shattered their relationship into a million pieces â leaving neither of them any option but to move on.
Nora felt real. This genuine connection sheâd never experienced before. Abby knew it one year into their relationship. The pair had built this life together, one where she didnât feel trapped in, and one Abby could be proud of. She felt acknowledged and loved Nora. There wasnât a sliver of a doubt in her mind this where she needed to be.
She tells Nora when she needs space, and she isnât ashamed of it. If she didnât want to go out, Nora wouldnât guilt trip her into it. Abby didnât feel pressured to intertwine her identity with Nora just because they were together. Nora hardly ever gave Abby a reason to be upset. She showed up like partners were supposed to, even when Abby didnât.
But it was a heavy weight to carry for Nora. Being her first serious queer relationship, Abby was left stunted in areas where Nora had to lend a helping hand. She never made Abby feel bad about it, but the two of them could feel the string keeping them threatening to snap.
Often, it frustrated Abby. To always be the one receiving help and never giving it. She didn't blame her partner, but she was left at a crossroad.Â
She never understood Owen more and it really pissed her off.
To no fucking end.
But Nora was far more patient than Abby had ever shown. Maybe it was the testament to love or maybe Nora was just a good person and Abby is shitty. She had more patience than Mother Thersea herself, and it amazed her. Always guiding Abby with a gentle hand, never getting upset with her even when she let her anger shine through.
It makes her feel undeserving of a love she could never earn.
This pure and untainted love had never touched her before, and sheâd never fallen this hard. Abby didnât want to be anywhere but here. She really thought this could be it. Nora could be the one. They could get through those hardships together, right?Â
Then you came and overwhelmed her like a tsunami.
She was running late, which was completely out of the ordinary for Abby. Instead of her neat braid, her sun kissed-blonde hair was in a low bun. Underneath her eyes was evidence of her lack of sleep. She hadnât been getting any as of lately and the bags only seemed to get deeper.
Abby wouldnât call the fights constant, but it sure did feel like it.
The back and forth, having the same fight consistently. Abby was more than frustrated. The biggest efforts she made were dismissed by Nora, even making her upset at times. She was trying too hard and being annoying, or not doing enough and then it meant she wasnât present in the relationship.
Abby felt her stuck at a wall, Nora on the other side of it and she couldnât hear a damn thing.
So, she was running late.
One of the many fights theyâve had with each other as of late. Nora is tired of dealing with a âbaby gayâ as she likes to remind her in the heat of their arguments. Abby gets offended, her lips forming into an even deeper pout, her porcelain skin flushed in anger before she gives them both space.Â
Contemplating about the future of their relationship in the shower, causing her to be late to work in the process.Â
Astronomically behind â her client arrived at the gym she worked at half an hour ago. The most recent argument with Nora plagued her morning. All they seem to do is argue, trapped in what they both need from the relationship, but all the two of them could do is argue, argue, argue.
But neither of them makes a move. They are still as the eerie silence that carries them into questioning.Â
Itâs when sheâs too inside her head, fearing about the future, when she violently bumps into you. Body colliding with yours, Abbyâs stone-like build causes you to crash into the pavement, your belongings scatter along with Abbyâs.Â
âFuck. Are you alright? Sorry, Iâm in such a hurry, Iâm sure I wasnât even paying attention.â You let her pick you from the ground, she does with ease. She looks right through you and you expect the excitement, the excited tears, or to be asked for a picture but it never comes.  Â
âFor a moment I thought I ran into a wallââ You giggle to yourself. âReally, Iâm alright.â You spoke softly. You pick up both of your belongings that had slipped from both of your grips, returning it to its owner.Â
âAre you sure youâre okay? I didnât hurt you, did I?â Abby asks again.Â
You think itâs cute how much lace of concern is conveyed in her cerulean eyes, full of light and wonder, so beautiful it stops you in your tracks.Â
âNo no! Iâm fine! Really donât worry about it.âÂ
Honestly, youâre still in amazement she has no idea who you are. It makes your fondness of her grow even more. The two of you depart quickly, go about your day, and you think nothing of it until you go to unlock your phone to message your manager and itâs not a picture of the moon youâd taken during the eclipse, itâs the mysteriously hot and kind woman youâd run into before.Â
Shit. She has my phone.Â
Lucky for you, Abby was coming to the same realization. Ready to bring out the workout she had planned out for her first client, opening her phone to access where she had written everything out only to find this isnât her phone. Well, fuck.Â
Abby hollers at Dina to take over the client for a moment, excusing herself for a moment before retreating into the office to call from her direct line.Â
Idiot Anderson. Now you get to make an idiot of yourself, twice.Â
Way to go.Â
She calls her phone and it rings a few times before the familiar voice chimes through the speaker, the one she heard this morning during her fit of anxiety.Â
âPlease tell me this is the woman I ran into earlier or else Iâm going to be even more embarrassed for answering a stranger's phone.âÂ
âWell youâre in luck.âÂ
âOh thank fuckââ You curse yourself before being so vulgar with someone who you didnât even know. âSorry! God, this is all my fault. I must have swapped our phones when I picked them up and didnât even realize.âÂ
âItâs okay, really, if I was paying attention where I was walking this morning it never would have happened. Did you wanna meet?âÂ
âNo! Let me. Please, this is all my fault. I should at least be the one who makes the drive.âÂ
âAre you sure? Itâs really no trouble. I donât mind.âÂ
âIâm really sure.âÂ
Abby offers the address of work, thinking once after she does if itâs a good idea, a total stranger knowing where she works but sheâs already giving the street name and suite number before she can even make her mind. Abby usually doesnât get nervous but this situation has sent her into a frenzy, thinking about how dumb she could have been. Nora will get a good laugh out of it she thinks, then she is reminded of the fight the two of them were still in. She wonders if sheâs even tried to reach out to her yet or if Noraâs just waiting until Abbyâs anger rolls over.Â
More favorably, the ladder.Â
Until the two of them have the comfort of their lives, the cushion they have between their shared friends and the home they share twenty minutes out of the state, until it comes up again and theyâll be contemplating it all over again. Anxiously, the front desk girl, Bevs, the younger girl who has a crush on her, shyly comes up to her.Â
Bevs says what she assumes is your name, confusing Abby in the process.Â
âYou know her?âÂ
âHow could you not? Sheâs one of the most famous actresses ever.â Abby is stunned to say the least. Truthfully, she had no idea. Her lack of social media keeps her out of the loop and as much as her friends tease her about, if Abby knew who you were the first time around, sheâs sure she wouldnât have been able to say more than two words. Clearly, youâre a fresh face to her. Already, Abby knows Manny is going to have a field day when Bevs lets this information spill in her sheer excitement.Â
Great, she thinks.Â
âOh.âÂ
âI put her in your office. Some of the clients were already starting to have questioning looks, putting the pieces together. Hey! Maybe they're as clueless as you.âÂ
âBevs, go back to the front desk.â With a curt nod and realizing she has pushed too far, with a tail between her legs she retreats back to her post.Â
Okay, Anderson, letâs get this over with.Â
Abby smells you the minute she steps foot in her office. Itâs not the usual pinewood scent the candle in her office radiates. Thereâs a lingering smell of lavender with just a hit of vanilla. Itâs sweet as it engulfs her nostrils, she finds herself sniffling slightly, a silent beg for more of it. Youâre standing the minute youâre aware of her presence. Painfully, Abby is aware of her lack of clothing. The tight sport jacket is left unopened, her black sweatpants, accompanied with her sports bra, abs on display as she watches your eyes examine her carefully.Â
Sheâs not sure how to feel about it.Â
There is a moment, a short one where your eyes go to her chest, the silver barbells constricting against the small fabric, clear as to what lies beneath.Â
Abby does smirk at that. Sheâs only human.Â
You keep staring at her for a minute longer, well it feels like one but Abby deems it couldnât have been more than a few seconds. âSorry to keep you waiting.âÂ
âItâs really not a problem.â The more time goes on, the sweeter you are. âItâs pretty close to where I live.âÂ
Abby didnât know it then but you were lying straight through your teeth. The trainer didnât know you moved around your entire day to make the phone swap or the butterflies swarming your stomach from just how attractive and nice she seemed to be. There was something about her that sent your caution flying to the wind, drifting in the leaves with the rest of your pride.Â
âWell I appreciate you coming out this way, even if itâs in your area. I really wouldnât have minded taking the drive.â Abby pulls out your phone as she hands you yours. Itâs simple, transactional, and it should have just been left at that but you had a fondness of putting your foot in your mouth.Â
âAre you a trainer here?âÂ
âUh, yeah. Been doing it for a few years actually. I spent so much time here already, now I get paid for it. Canât really complain.âÂ
âDo you ever do private sessions?âÂ
âUm-â Abby scratches the back of her awkwardly, not sure if youâre asking her genuinely or if youâre trying to insinuate something else entirely.Â
âOh fuck no! I didnât mean it like that. I just have aâŠ.job opportunity I have to get in shape for and you just look like you know what youâre doing.â Abby thought you might as well point to her physique but if anything she was flattered. It was always nice knowing something sheâs been working on for years, her longest standing commitment besides Nora, is appreciated.Â
âSure, we could work something out.â You slightly smile before you exchange phones, this time on purpose, to put in the otherâs number. Normally, she didnât give out her number to clients, but Abby makes an exception for you that day. To this day, sheâll never outwardly admit why she did, not even to herself.Â
-Â
Two years later, sheâs single from her life being turned upside down by you. The casualty being her own relationship, leaving Nora behind was one of the hardest decisions sheâs made. Nora never agreed on Abby taking the job. As much as Nora wished for Abby to be more open about their endeavors, as soon as she accepted an offer that could drastically expand the trajectory of their life, Nora couldnât be asked to compromise another thing.Â
That was that. Not even two months into Abby working for you and Nora had called it quits. Abby never talked about it, only you knew she had a girlfriend she used to talk about when you began training with her, and then it was just silent. Back then, you didnât know her well enough to pry, so you didnât.Â
Even as time passed, the two of you became friends through your employment, spending all your time with her during press season for your upcoming film, Lonely Is The Muse, together. Today was the only day you had off, even if it means Abby technically had the day off, you insisted that both of you leave the hotel and go out for the day. It's the most peace you felt during the European leg of the tour. Only one more day of dealing with your sensory issues, people in your face telling you when and where to go, or the distasteful question regarding your past public breakup instead of the work you were promoting.Â
Some interviewers were kind enough to let the drama go but some wanted to get their own viral moment, waiting for you to say the wrong thing. As the industry likes to say, any publicity is good publicity.Â
When youâre America's sweetheart actress of the century, such luxuries canât be afforded.Â
As your manager likes to remind you, thereâs a reputation you have to protect.Â
âWould you like to head back now? Long day tomorrow. Last day of interviews and then your flight leaves first thing in the morning.âÂ
âDid Stassie put you up to this?âÂ
âMaybe.âÂ
âI thought you were supposed to be the fun one.âÂ
âMhm, your definition of fun is letting you do whatever you want.âÂ
âAnd the problem with that is?âÂ
All Abby can do is chuckle.Â
âWhat do you want to do then?â Abby asks. She takes note of the sparkle in your eyes, as blinding as the sun but obtaining the serenity of the moon. âIâm all ears sweetheart.âÂ
Itâs how the two of you end up here, a rooftop party, a friend of a friend you said. The party was lowkey, more than the typical ones you would get invited. Maybe because you werenât in Los Angeles, Miami, or New York â but tucked away on another continent â or perhaps everyone here is just discreet.Â
Thereâs only two fans that come up to you instead of twenty. Youâre thankful for some sense of normalcy, one night where you can just feel normal. It still never gets old, people coming up to you as they confess the impact youâve had on their life. It feels unbelievable at times but youâre grateful for the luxury life youâve been granted.Â
âHere. No liquor tonight.â Abby hands you a glass of red wine, your favorite beverage of choice when you couldnât have tequila.Â
âYes Maâam.â You playfully salute her. More than anything, you enjoy the not so subtle chuckle. âNot that I donât love your company but isnât Stassie supposed to boss me around?âÂ
âShe felt under the weather. Plus, we both know you donât listen to her.âÂ
âAnd I listen to you?â Your hand plays with her loose blonde hair, smoothing out the white button sheâs wearing.Â
âYeah, you do. I wonder why that is.â Abby is playing with fire tonight. Possibly due to the fact that you wouldnât leave her side, not even for a moment, keeping your body close, practically gluing yourself to her. Yes, sheâs charged with keeping you safe and protected but it seems you find enjoyment bringing it to another level entirely.Â
âYouâre much nicer to look at, thatâs all.â Itâs light, a quiet whisper, not meant to be heard by anyone â not even for Abby to hear. âDonât wanna make my handsome bodyguard upset.âÂ
Faking your pout as you let the words leave your lips, Abby chuckles as you get closer to her, her body standing strong as you push your weight onto her. Stoic as always, while you lean on her, she keeps her eyes peeled. Ensuring your safety at all times.Â
âFlattery isnât going to get you a shot tonight.âÂ
âIâm just stating the obvious.âÂ
Abby chuckles, again. Sheâs delighted youâre enjoying yourself, even if it comes at her expense. Thereâs a soft jazz song playing outside, couples dancing to the music, you zone out for a moment as you look upon one in particular.Â
They are older, possibly in their forties, raven hair beginning to gray, fine lines crinkle when they smile at each other but itâs hard to take note of anything else but the way the couple looks at each other. Your mind wonders how long theyâve been together, if itâs been for years, months, a couple weeks.Â
It doesnât really matter. You just want that.Â
The feeling isnât lost on you, especially when youâre in the arms of the woman you love. For her, sheâs being protective, doing her job but you wish it was different. A bubbling desire dripping off your tongue, a need to have her close to you but because she wants. Not because sheâs paid to.Â
âIf I canât have any tequila shots, god forbid, you have to dance with me.â You down the rest of your wine, placing the empty glass on the bar. âCâmon, you can give Stassie an earful later.âÂ
Pulling her towards the makeshift dance floor, Abby leads as your head rests against her chest. The steady, soft heartbeat soothes you, a reminder of the safety you feel with her. Caught in the riptide of her kind eyes and heart full of gold. Itâs what makes her so unique, so loved, so her. With a surprisingly good tone, Abby sings to the music softly before twirling you around and spinning your body back to her.Â
âIs there anything you canât do?â Your hand rubs lovingly on her lower back as she holds you in her arms. You take pride when it doesnât feel transactional. When she holds you and it feels as if she was meant to. Thereâs nothing else comparable to it, her frame melting into yours as your soul finds solace in her warm embrace.Â
âThereâs plenty of things.â Playfully, Abby smirks.Â
âOh yeah. Iâm sure.âÂ
The sarcasm practically drips out of you as her smirk grows wider.Â
âCan I ask you something?â You hesitate for a moment as you find her beautiful blue eyes staring into your soul. Itâs only then does everything troubling might dissipate while she holds you â secretly hoping itâs forever.Â
âYou can ask me anything.âÂ
You give yourself a moment to collect your thoughts as you move to the delicate beat. âDo you ever wish for a life where you could have had a normal life? I wonder if things could be different.âÂ
Immediately, Abby answers.Â
âNot anymore, no, not for a second.âÂ
If it was even possible, Abby pulls you closer to her, not urging a word more. Itâs how she is, cold and distant to some but they donât feel the stutter in her breath when youâre near or the soft pad of her thumb rubbing soothingly on the back of your hand. Or the soft words of encouragement when youâre having a difficult day.Â
They hear none of it.Â
She dances with you for a couple more songs, before you find solace on the couch. You lay beneath the moonlight, your body cuddles into her side as you stare up at the sky.Â
Itâs lost on you how youâve ended with her, someone as kind and untainted as her, wanting to spend her free time with you, but youâre grateful for it. Whatever god you have to thank, youâll get on your knees to praise their alter for bringing Abby into your life. Sheâs the best thing to ever happen to you and she doesnât even know it. Albeit, she hardly knows the extent of how wonderful she is.Â
âWhy here?âÂ
âItâs a good night, nice weather. Why not?âÂ
A question with a question. Itâs the most straightforward answer youâll ever give her. Innuendos for the sweet girl to piece together, but with the soft circles being drawn her stomach with the pad of your finger leaves little to nothing to decode.Â
âItâs nice, yeah.âÂ
Abby always has so little to say but her mind swarms with a thousand reasons why this is a bad idea and a million of why this is where the constellations in the jaded sky have led to you. Straight into the pits of innocence, a heart thatâs been hurt more times than she can count but still as golden and whole as one could be.Â
âWhat do you think of Italy?âÂ
âItâs nice.âÂ
âNice? Thatâs all I get?âÂ
Abby smirks but her body stills when you play with the waistband of her trousers before gliding back to the security of her abdomen, carving the liner of her defined abs. The ones she tries so hard to cover up, but you saw on the very first day you met her.Â
âDo you want more?â You ask, an eyebrow raising in suggestion. Abby knows itâs a double edged sword, one she doesnât want to be injured with.Â
âYouâre playing a very dangerous game.â Cautiously, Abby warns. âIâm not sure that last drink was a great idea.âÂ
You rest your head on her sternum, sapphire eyes looking down at you as her hand finds home on your waist, the blunt of your nails scratching softly at her stomach.Â
âThey always seem like a great idea at the time, donât they?â With a gentle hand, you caress her scarred cheek, the pad of your thumb gently tenderly kissing the freckled skin. Outlining the softness of her jaw with your left, while your right one refuses to leave her stomach.Â
âI donât see how anyone would ever want to leave you.â Abby hums, not giving you much to go off of, tight lipped as sheâs always been. The Nora situation has always been on your mind. One day, Abbyâs speaking of her like sheâs the love of her life and the next? Abby stiffens so tight when you bring up her name you promise yourself to never speak of it again. Until now, almost two years later, youâre more curious than you have ever been. The fatal ending, not belonging to you, but still you paw for the answers with your greedy palms.Â
âYou can just ask me if you want to know. I can see the look in your eyes.âÂ
âWhat look? I donât have aââÂ
Abby tilts your chin with your palm, leaning into her touch as you often do.Â
âYes, you do.âÂ
âHow do you know this look?âÂ
âHm.â Her thumb pulls at your bottom lip, âYouâre just trying to get me in trouble now.âÂ
Your tone shifts, your eyes become transcendent, more crystal clear than theyâd been all night.Â
âWhat happened between you and Nora?â You ask, treading lightly on the ground youâre skating upon, in fear the ground beneath you might just crack if you apply too much pressure.Â
âWhy is it so important to you?âÂ
âItâs not that itâsââ You face plant into her chest, giving yourself a moment to breathe. Fuck, even her chest smells good.Â
âYou donât ask about anything unless itâs of value to anyone. You donât waste time, youâre very adamant about it. Painfully so.â Blonde eyebrows relax as she closes her eyes for a moment, but her touch on you soothes you. Itâs gentle; a somber comfort bleeding into blissful joy.Â
âBut Iâve spent a lot of time with you.âÂ
âYes, youâve spent a lot of your time with me.
Abby opens her eyes to see you, your head tilted to the right, as you look upon each carve of her angelic face, the one that could only be carved by the gods above, resembling an angel on earth. As pure as the snow with the biggest heart of gold you ever have had the pleasure of knowing.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âI didnât say a thing.â You smile slyly.Â
âWe didnât break up because of you, if thatâs what youâre asking.â Abby sighs, âYouâre not some homewrecker. My home with Nora was already wrecked before we met.âÂ
âAre you just saying it to make me feel better?âÂ
âNo, Iâm not.â You play with the ends of her golden hair, it hurts to be this close to what you want but knowing itâs so clearly out of your reach, league even, all of it will end the same. âNora wasnât fond of her being my first relationship with a woman. It caused a ripple effect, me feeling like I wasnât good enough and her feeling like she has to carry me in the relationship, emotionally anyway.âÂ
âIs that why you broke up?âÂ
âNo.âÂ
âIt was because of me.â You state, as a matter of fact, knowing there is no other truth to be known. With tears welling up in your eyes, an ache in your heart, one that made you ache all over. The dread of the guilt weighing heavily on your heart, time and distance still isnât enough for you to run from it.Â
âIt was a job that was a great opportunity. Alright? It wasnât you, even if I hadnât, we both wanted different things. I didnât even realize it until after but I wasnât happy. I promise, it has nothing to do with you.âÂ
What Abby didnât know, you needed to hear her say those words. In the back of your head, a monstrous demon unleashes in your mind, telling you crashed her relationship. You were the problem and her inevitable doom, but sheâs assuring you it wasnât the case.Â
âWe hardly knew each other back then.âÂ
As pathetic as it sounds, Abby canât imagine her life without you.Â
âYeah hardly.âÂ
Thereâs that look again, pouring into Abbyâs soul as it eats her up whole, the gleam in your eyes begging for more. Itâll complicate things if Abby gets involved, she knows this, but it already seems like she is despite her best efforts not to be.Â
âDid I do good? You always say you miss stargazing with your brother back home. I know itâs not as quiet as the cabin you have, but I thought it would be okay for now.âÂ
âThe view isnât bad, not one bit.â She admits as she lets you rub her abdomen, the goosebumps crawling upon her skin the more Abby lets you touch her as if sheâs yours to hold. âLev would like it. Iâm convinced the kid likes you more than me now.âÂ
âAs he should. Iâm pretty damn amazing.âÂ
âHe asks too many questions though.âÂ
âAbout what?âÂ
âI dunnoâŠ..things.â Abby retreats back into her shell, the layer of protection she uses to protect herself from getting hurt. Most of all, out of everyone the gods could torture her to be confused about, of course it has to be you. Everyone in your life is always begging for pieces of your time, pieces of your affection and bits of your time to suck you dry. Abby has always wondered how you juggle it all. It feels cruel to even think you would put her in the mix.Â
Painfully, thereâs nights like tonight, where she sees the desire swarming in your eyes â every part of her pleads to give in to the temptation. Give into something sheâs never even let herself think about until the last few months. As thick as drywall, there was a barrier keeping her heart from you, one she kept to protect you and herself even.Â
The absolute last thing she wanted was to wreck everything this has to offer. If she makes the wrong move, all of it can come crashing down on youâŠitâs the last thing she wants. Make you a martyr in her story, one she thinks and dreams of often but knows youâre too big for her to exist in your life. The circles you run in donât even exist in the same planet, the same fucking universe if Abbyâs being honest.Â
âWhat things?â You pout, your hand traveling south, caressing her thigh with a familiarity Abby wishes you didnât have. She wishes for a lot but they never come true, thatâs all you can be, a dying wish Abby curses upon a fading star. Â
âItâs just stupid shit, not worth mentioning.âÂ
âAbbyâŠâÂ
âYeah?âÂ
âIââ You take a deep breath, your voice already shaky and you havenât even told her yet. âI donât think you even know how much you mean to me.â Abby isnât sure where youâre going with this, terrifying her instantly.Â
Have you finally had your fill of her? Were you gonna fire her? Now?Â
âLev doesnât just talk to you about us.âÂ
âUs?â Nervously, Abby stomach clenches, unprepared for where this conversation is heading.Â
âWhy are you so scared?âÂ
Abby visibly and loudly gulps, almost making you giggle slightly.Â
âI-Iâm not.âÂ
The stonewall she attempts to hide behind but you wonât let her, not tonight. Slumping in the shadows, waiting for you to find someone else to love as she watches your happiness from a far, thatâs what she allows herself. Nothing more and nothing less.Â
âAbs, look at me.â She meets your eyes, away from the constellations in the sky, afraid if she looks for a moment too long sheâll be stuck here forever. âTalk to me, mâright here, not going anywhere unless you want me to.âÂ
Instantly, Abby grips your hips, keeping you in your place.Â
âNo, thatâs notââÂ
âWhat?âÂ
âIâm not what you want. Iâm surely not what anyone needs. Hell, Iâve only been with one woman which is deemed to be for not being enough, right? Iâm the girl who came out too late, who doesnât have enough experience but because Iâm built like some fucking adonis I need to know whatever the fuck Iâm doing but I donât. I never know what Iâm doing. The only thing I know how to do is protect you, thatâs all Iâm good for and Iâm not gonna screw that up just because IââÂ
âBecause what?â Your pelvis is on top of hers, your face coming closer to Abbyâs, watching as you are irrevocably close to her, closer than youâve ever been, wet lips ghosting over her pouty pink lips. Abby doesnât even know when you moved, how you got so close, too lost in her own head to register your movements.Â
âIt doesnât matter.â Abby puffs out.Â
âIt matters to me.â You sink into her, further, if it's even possible. âNo one matters more than you, alright?âÂ
âBut thereâs people.â Abby looks for an excuse to get up, she comes up enough so sheâs sitting up against the armrest of the patio couch, holding your lower back as she does so, leaving you straddling her hips.Â
âI donât care. All that matters is you.â You push a piece of blonde hair away, seeing her beautiful cheeks more clearly, her shining blue eyes finding its unique path to your heart, the one especially made for her. âHere just let me talk, alright? You donât have to say anything. Just listen.âÂ
Abby is nearly crying, practically purring as you run your fingers through her cascading blonde hair. Itâs too much but not enough. Although she is sure of one thing, the one thing she wants more than anything.Â
âIâve always been one for pretty girls. I had a reputation around Hollywood, always chasing one after the next, never reaching my fill or as the tabloids like to say.â You chuckled half-heartedly; the wound cutting deeper than you would have liked. âMy publicist having to pay paparazzi an obscene amount of money to get these photos from ever hitting online, month after month, it was pathetic really. Just trying to fill a hole, one I didnât even know how to fill.âÂ
âI didnât know that.âÂ
âItâs not something Iâm proud of and I never wanted you to see me differently but Iâm not ashamed anymore though. Iâm not that person anymore. I havenât been since I met you.â Abby falls silent, her cheeks turning crimson before she can try to hide it âYou not knowing how I was, it's just the humbling I needed. Not to mention you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seenâ you still areâ but you had a girlfriend so I kept my feelings silent. Something just felt different with you and then you were single and I was afraid of you.âÂ
âWhy?âÂ
âBecause I didnât want to ruin you so I made a promise to myself. I would never start anything with you, not unless I was in love with you.âÂ
âYou love me?âÂ
âItâs impossible not to.â You sigh into her, forehead pressed against hers, her strong hold not letting go. âYou donât have to say anything or do anything. I donât expect anything in return. I just canât live in a world where you think because youâre not experienced as some, you think youâre less than people who are.âÂ
âItâs true, Iâm not there with everyone else and it shows.âÂ
âAbby, youâre not getting it.âÂ
âWell, no shit. Iâm not good enough for any of this, you especially.âÂ
âItâs notâŠâ You bite your lip as you reach for her hands on your waist, intertwining them with your own. âAbs, it wouldâve saved me a lot of trouble.â Your lips ghost over her lips again, but this time Abby inches closer, her breath warm as it hits your mouth.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âIf I was a patient person and waited for you.âÂ
More than before, Abbyâs breath is heavy as the rise and fall of her chest is rapid, trying to calm herself down but itâs impossible when youâre this close. Itâs a lot for her, maybe sheâs overly sensitive, but your touch is practically lighting her on fire. Abby wonders if it will ever be able to be put out or if your magnetic touch will leave her scorned.Â
Puppy eyes inwardly pleading for an ounce of your touch, so sweet as she supports your weight with her strong thighs, anchoring you to her â never quite letting go. A single glance detrimental to the layer of protection she built around herself.Â
âThereâs no more waiting, mâright here.â Abby closes the gap indefinitely, lips connecting with yours as they move in perfect harmony, as if this is what she was made for. Involuntarily, she whimpers in your mouth as you gently tug at her bottom nibble at her bottom lip, your tongue sliding in as it dominates her own. It happens too quickly â the way her very being melts into you.Â
Like honey to a bee, thereâs nothing thatâs ever been so sweet.Â
This is all you need.Â
âAbby?âÂ
âYeah, angel?âÂ
âLetâs get out of here.â
taglist: @brackishkittie @only4theweeknd @tlouloser @marvelwomenarehot0 @grey-jedi12 @r3starttt @bittersu1te @pxgeturner @maxinephobia @marsworldd @aouiaa @twopeoplee @i-lov3-w0men @lvlymicha @half-of-a-gay @pa-co @rkivedpages @abbyspup @lucidfairies @lizzygrant @yourfriendlyneighborhoodeden @iluvme9 @skzhoiic @angelynn-nicole @hearts4joongie @moonyvs4 @loveyru @imdrowningindispair @random-fag @swinesb @spacewlf
#THIS SHIT BEEN IN MY DRAFTS SINCE MARCH.#MARCH!#anyways lmk if you guys like it!#more to come from me soon#i've been very motivated lately âĄ#abby anderson#abby anderson angst#abby anderson fluff#abby anderson x reader#abby anderson x fem!reader#abby anderson x masc reader#abby anderson x female reader#abby x reader#abby x y/n#abby anderson x you#abby anderson x y/n#abby anderson fanfiction
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If King Charles dies on or before March 25th, 2024, he will technically be the shortest-reigning king in English history.
Anyway, like to charge, reblog to cast.
#king charles#king charles iii#king edward#king edward viii#march 25#the royal leech#royal family#britain#lmao#like to charge#reblog to cast
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i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:
1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.
2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.
60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.
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we've done it again folks
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ATTENTION TUMBLR
CHOCOLATE GUY'S BIRTHDAY IS IDES OF MARCH
#amaury guichon#chocolate guy#ides of march#cor speaks#WHY ISNT ANYONE LOSING THEIR MIND OVER THIS!#MARCH 15#!!#julius caesar#The chocolate guy#*10k#*20k#*30K#*40K#*50K#*60K#*70k
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Ok now we have a booping feature I propose to tumblr next ides of March we have a stabbing counter and the person with the most stabs gets crowned Caesar and the blog with the most stabbings gets crowned Brutus
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Like to STAB
Reblog to STAB AGAIN
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all of tumblr tomorrow, march 15th:
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#ides of march#julius caesar#caesar#brutus#knives out#*muffled laughter*#you can't tell me it's not like that#happy ides of march eve
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There was a new LGBT+ acronym, and it was twig etc. (it had to be in lowercase for some reason). It stood for trans, Welsh, intersex, and gay. Everyone else was etc. It was very controversial.
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Submitted by @retrocausality
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I wanted to meme before the big day.
Not yet, Brutus.. not yet..
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My take on unicorns! I'd really love to make a mythical creature field guide someday, since the Spiderwick Field Guide is what inspired me to start drawing in the first place đ„°
#also I actually drew this in like. March lmao#I just kept telling myself I was gonna do a full painting of them in their natural environment and then I kept putting it off#until I realized I didn't actually wanna do that đ maybe someday if I get a chance to make that book then I'll do it#my art#unicorn#junicorn#speculative biology#unicorn art
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