#how do you keep going without thinking of how useless this is?
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celestiamour · 2 days ago
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ft. logan howlett, ororo munroe, laura kinney, wanda wilson, wade wilson, kurt wagner, jean grey, scott summers (separate) x f! reader — xmen, marvel
╰₊✧ how they are when you are on your time of the month┊1k words
contains: some smutty topics for logan & jean, periods and all the complimentary side effects obviously because it’s so generous ahahahahaaaaaaaaa
➤ author's note: oh how i hate being a woman at times, if only some strong mutants could come to life and help ease the suffering…
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let’s get this out of the way— yes, logan howlett can smell it and is able to tell when you’re on our period. in fact, he’s even able to sniff out the difference between the blood from menstruation and the blood from injuries. he’s been… “around the block” to put it lightly, he knows what you are going through, will be nice about it, and will use his experience to help care for you. he won’t be as sassy as he usually is even if you are a bit snappy, he’ll get extra food and put aside snacks for you, and he’ll give you as much or as little space as you want. also very willing to eat you out or cuddle-fuck you during it, being a little messy doesn’t faze him and he’s probably done nastier. 8/10, he’ll help you get through it without any complaint.
ororo munroe knows when your cycle is coming before you do, she keeps track of it and is on duty to take care of you the second you wake up with that uncomfortable feeling in your panties. she’s already inside the bathroom attached to your room running a warm bath completely with bath bombs and flower petals, ready to carry you into the water, and to strip your bedsheets for a wash if they get stained. there’s even a cute little wicker basket full of candies and drinks on your bedside with a stuffed animal she brought from target sitting on your bedside. it may seem excessive to some for something that happens every month, but she believes the effort is worth it if it means easing your pains. 10/10, she’s an angel descended from heaven in your eyes.
both of your dads are pretty useless (worst! logan is less knowledgeable than his original counterpart) on the topic and althea gives you a piece of chocolate at most, so you and laura kinney need to take care of each other when shark weeks come around. so many cuddles, kisses, and movie nights while snacking because cravings are a bitch. she’ll pat you on the back and rub your shoulders, muttering little “i know, princess, i know” as you whine. don’t even think of moving if you’re in a position like that, she’ll run around the house to get you pain relievers and a hot water bottle. 9/10, she’s such a wonderful girlfriend.
not sure why, but i feel like you and wanda wilson’s periods would sync a lot? anyhow, it’s a nightmare dealing with mood swings, cramps, and cravings all while taking care of babypool, so there’s a general rule not to take anything seriously during those days because you’re both sensitive and irritable. once it’s all over though, you’re back in each other’s arms and apologizing for anything that might have been said or done (nothing serious happened, it’s just something like “i’m sorry for saying that in an off tone and making you think i was mad at you”). 5/10, could be a lot better but the days afterward are kinda like honeymoon bliss again.
wade wilson is the biggest shit of them all, he definitely says “and that’s on period” every time he finds out, calls you his little ketchup bottle, sends you period cramp moodboards which are just poorly cropped photos of him in the deadpool suit doubled over in pain from a fight— however, he will make you laugh so hard you’ll cry and forget about the ache in your body. 2/10 in terms of helpfulness but 10/10 in terms of funny jokes and conversations. 
you’ll give poor kurt wagner a heart attack every time you whine out in pain and curl up on the couch, clutching onto your stomach and contorting about to find a comfortable position. despite the promises from yourself and everyone else that you will be fine as the aching feeling is temporary, he can’t help but bite his nails from worry. the suffering of people with a uterus will never cease to shock him, they really have to bleed freely like that for a few days every month? he will not leave you alone and is going to treat your every request like an order from royalty. anything you want, you get, and no amount of assurance is going to convince him he doesn’t have to do all that, so you might as well enjoy it while you’re moody and suffering. 
jean grey is one of those people who just don’t have period cramps and still glows despite it all which you are so fucking jealous of. that being said, she’s the best person to be around when it hits. since she’s basically the mansion’s school nurse, she always has snacks, water, pads/tampons of every variety, and pain relievers on hand with so much bounty that she never seems to run out. as your girlfriend, she’s also willing to be a bit sneaky and write you a doctor’s note to get you out of classes regardless of if you are a teacher or a student. she’s also down to fuck even if you’re on your period since she knows orgasms are proven to lessen the pain and she’ll also massage your tits if they are feeling tender (and because she likes your chest no matter the size). 9/10, she can be a bit busy at times but is perfect aside from that.
please hold hands with scott summers and go with him when picking out pads/tampons, he will get overwhelmed by the amount of options and panic buy one of everything. what are wings? liners? what’s the difference between yellow and green, is it lemon or lime? he might forget that you’re more sensitive during these times and slip a comment into a conversation that would make you cry when it usually makes you laugh, but he’ll remind you to stay hydrated, will go out of his way to buy you brownies from your favorite bakery, and will smother you in cuddles. 
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urno1luv · 2 days ago
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sana x reader
what if you were sana's new manager?
(also if this gets enough attention, i'll make a what-if series with different female idols, mostly pretty dark tho so dni if uncomfy!!)
cw: EXTREMELY ooc sana (she's so sweet, but here? not so much😭), age gap, power imbalance, obsessive/possessive behaviours, implied non-con towards the end
💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋
the moment you were promoted to being her manager, everything changed. sana was beautiful, poised, a fan favorite, and an idol who's been around for so long. naturally, you were really shocked, and slightly scared. imagine being in charge of a member of TWICE?? it was enough pressure to make anyone succumb quickly to stress, but you were dedicated to the job, which caught sana's attention, but not in a good way.
sana was not really pleased to see how... composed you were around her. the amount of compliments she got daily made her rather egotistical, so seeing you this "unbothered" when accompanying her to meetings and events really ticked her off, to put it simply. and when she heard about how old you were... sana's pride was HURT. a woman in charge of what she does, one who was younger than her by a few years? don't piss her off.
the next time you saw her, the mask fell off. sana would laugh at your smallest mistakes, throw away the food you gave her after a music show promotion, RIGHT in front of you, and treat every effort as something to be dismissed or useless. "do you think this is good enough? you were running late, i'm your fucking boss. seriously, what kind of manager are you?" sana scoffed as your face heated up in embarrassment, tears pricking at your eyes. why was she suddenly so mean? she stood closer to you, her tone laced with sadistic amusement. "don't cry, love, if you were more competent, i wouldn't be pissed, but... gotta work with what i got."
sana would sneer at your pathetic attempts to please her, and one night, she dropped all of her makeup brushes, and forced you to pick them up one by one. but what sana didn't expect was to feel.. something for you that very second. the way you always came back to her, still took care of her despite her countless insults towards you... she definitely went home to reflect on that.
the conclusion sana came to was that she really did like you. in her own, cruel way. and we've already established how she was an egotistical maniac who uses her power, so she refused to let you step out of line or get close to anyone else, and she’d punish you in small, petty ways if you tried. schedule changes without warning, "accidentally" spilling rumours that made things harder for you, and reminders that you only had this position because she allowed it. as much as you wanted to push back, the truth was undeniable: sana held your career—and your sanity—in her hands.
sana's fixation on you only seemed to get worse, as the months went by. and she made sure you KNEW it. she knew where you were at all times, texting you constantly, filling your phone with messages that were affectionate one moment and threatening the next. if you so much as glanced at anyone else, sana would go out of her way to isolate you, to sabotage anything that might distract you from her. "you’re mine," she'd whisper, almost tenderly, before tightening her grip on your waist as she pushed you against a wall. every attempt to set boundaries only seemed to feed her obsession. and with every passing day, you realized that she’d do anything, and i mean ANYTHING, to keep you by her side, whether you wanted it or not.
one fateful night, where she had dragged you to her penthouse, you would soon come to the realisation that sana was truly someone that you should've ran away from a loooong time ago. you sat stiffly on the edge of her bed, the dim glow of the bedside lamp casting shadows across the room. sana stood in front of you, close enough that you could feel the weight of her gaze. her hand moved to your shoulder, fingers pressing in with a possessive force that left no doubt who was in control. “don’t even think about leaving,” she whispered, her voice chillingly soft, as if daring you to defy her. sana leaned in, her other hand resting heavily between your legs, pinning you in place. every touch felt like a claim, each movement sending a quiet threat through the air. as her fingers tightened their hold, you realized escape wasn’t an option; you were exactly where she wanted you, and there was no way out.
sana's hands moved back up to your shoulders, firm and unyielding as she guided you back against the pillows, her hot tongue tracing possessively along your neck, the saliva cooling down quickly in the cold air, making your pulse race. she murmured sweet nothings into your ear, calming you down, voice low and commanding as she leaned in, body pressing onto yours. her hand slid down to your wrist, pinning it against the bed as her lips brushed close to your ear, each word a quiet, inescapable claim. the weight of sana's presence left no room for protest, every touch a reminder that here, in this room, you belonged entirely to her.
💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋
when you woke, the room was dark, save for the faint glow of her phone screen, casting eerie shadows across her face as sana sat beside you, watching. you tried to move, but a strange, deep ache reminded you how powerless you were in her world, in her hands. her fingers traced along your arm, and she smiled—a soft, chilling smile that only deepened your sense of dread. "you belong to me," sana whispered, voice filled with a twisted satisfaction. "I told you, no one else could ever love you like I do." you couldn’t remember when you’d fallen asleep, or how long she’d been there, but one thing was certain: there was no part of you sana hadn’t claimed, judging from the pain in your heart, and the bruises and hickeys shamelessly left in obvious areas.
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casteliacityramen · 3 days ago
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Previous post (mini recap)
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"Can we talk?"
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"That depends if you'll yell at me and take off again."
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"Depending on what you say, I just might."
[PART 1 OF 2]
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"... Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't know how to, without... that... happening. It was sheer coincidence that led Ingram’s descendants to keep coming here. I didn't think you'd believe me," Ray responded telepathically.
"I still don't."
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"I have nothing to gain by lying to you."
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She hates that part of him, how he manages to sound so disingenuous while still telling the truth. There's always something underneath the surface, but he never goes there unless she pokes and prods. She could have ended that explanation right then and there, but she continues.
"But not telling me that the Dewott that I've seen every other night was a Matsumoto this entire time? Keeping that to yourself is okay?"
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One of the many problems of an infinite lifespan means that there's no longer agency to anything. There's no immediate need to address any personal matters when they theoretically have all the time left in the world.
He figured that he could have talked to her further down the line, when they both settled down and processed all of their feelings... Or so he thought. 
Touchy subject or not, it was starting to sink in that he should've talked about this sooner. Granted, he never would have guessed that the circumstances would have led them to where they were now. Neither of them imagined that today would���ve gone like this.
"Of course not...
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... But can you blame me when you reacted like you did?"
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"Alright, asshole, I came to apologize but if you’re going to-"
"You scared me."
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"Rio, when you were released, when you found me again, you sat on that seat and you said…”
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“... Nothing.”
The two of them sit still, time grinding to a halt while Ray’s eyes roamed the space underneath his hands–as if the grain in the wooden countertop was magically providing him instructions on how to organize his words.
Gods, he wished.
"You were so quiet, it was unsettling. You’ve never been one to shy away from talking about how you feel, so I know that something went terribly wrong. A Matsumoto stopping by every now and then seemed so inconsequential at the time. But… the more I thought about telling you, the more I second guessed myself.
So I left it unspoken. I had a feeling you would be angry with me and I was right... But I never thought you'd be furious.
We carried on quietly for the past six months because I wanted you to take the first step. I figured that you’d be ready whenever you felt like you it, but I should have told you about this without having to make you dredge up the past by yourself."
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I'm sorry."
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"This is supposed to be my apology about yelling at you, you prick." Rio telepathically mutters, not expecting this level of genuine introspection from him. "How am I supposed to follow that?"
She watches as Ray visibly laughs off the tension in his shoulders. She lets out a short huff in response, turning back to the counter.
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"I thought I was fine. I thought I was better than this–above it all. We went through something like this before, back when we first started. I thought we’d shrug it off like we did last time, but then I snapped like a toothpick today."
Ray watches as her face scrunches up in a cocktail of negative emotions. She seems like she's physically struggling to get anything out, which is an effort that didn't go unnoticed by Ray.
"I think running a ramen stand as a rockruff is exactly how I am now: absolutely useless. I'm not allowed to be useful. I'm not allowed to do my job as a Shepherd.
And that's a good thing, because now I can't stop thinking about all my mistakes--all the people I failed to protect. There's no use in a guardian angel that loses faith in herself."
She turns, facing the street, thankful that it was relatively empty at this time of hour.
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“So... I sat here, on this very stool, watching every day as everybody moved on with their lives without a care in the world. Ordinary people who seem to be doing fine without me.” 
Rio shakes her head at the term "ordinary people,” laughing bitterly as she turns back around.
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“I know I’m being stupid. A carefree life for everyone is what we work so hard for, yet I feel so… so pissed off at them for being none-the-wiser.
Imagine that: being mad that peace is the new ‘ordinary.’ Angry that these people don't know what it's like to live with the constant threat of death, even though none of them deserve it. It makes me feel like a shitty shepherd.
I thought it'd be easier if I slept through those moments, but every other time I fall asleep, I have a nightmare. When I try to think of anything else, all I can think about is how this all started. I thought about all the things we did to get to this point. I couldn't, and still can't, stop thinking about everything I did wrong back then and now.”
Ray heaves a heavy sigh, partly because he feels relieved that she's opening up to him, but another partly because he knows exactly what she's talking about.
“Yeah.”
She didn’t need him to say anything else. She knows that he knows. She'll tell him the full extent of what she went through and what she's going through, but that's for another day. That isn't the purpose of this specific conversation, after all.
She paws the empty glass around on the table sheepishly for a long moment. Finally, she gathers herself and turns to him.
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“I’m sorry I made you cry.” 
“I know.”
“Thanks for putting up with me.”
“You’ve been there for me. I wouldn't have it any other way.”
[Next]
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ultimatebottom69 · 5 hours ago
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You know.
What truly kills me with the pro-palestine bullshit i can call it bullshit because I am donating money to help. I put my mouth where my money is contrary to many of the pro-palestine.
Hum...I am sorry...You were not in accordance with Madam harris...So you did not vote for her. Because you were unhappy about how the Biden Administration was handling the whole thing.
Ok that's fair. Let's look at the opponenent real quick.
"I will finish the job. I will let them finish the job."
Hmmm....I don't know he seems hum...More likely to be worse. Then whatever Harris is going to do.
"You libs only can say that Trump is worse without giving me a better reason-"
See this is why Hitler got hired. I don't think I am entitled to explain to you that maYbe, you should keep the guy who did a whole ass Coup d'etat on you, all out of the White House.
Like. It's like a tumor, this genocide I mean, that is happening you had the choice between someone who will give pain killers which are pretty useless (Harris) or someone who is going to poison the waters and proudly announce it (Trump)
The patient begged you for pain killers.
And you decided after careful consideration. To take the guy who poisons the water...
I am not saying. You are stupid. I am saying...This didn't seem wise.
And now I see some Gen Z like me talking about "Plans" for the future. The same Gen Z who revealed they did not vote for Harris or Third party in fact. Per choice.
Ok. No no that's good that's good...When will you apply the plans and when will they reach the ultimate goal ? Which is to unfuck at least that problem ? Preferably before Palestine gets wiped out of the map would be so cool.
Oh ? Oh ....Oh...Yeah keeping the people informed...Hmhm that didn't seem to work. At all. Oh ? Forming a community...Ok ok. Yeah seems cool. A 20 step plan to make voting easier. That's great when will it reach the White house ?
Because Again may I remind you. Alll that I am saying is this shit gotta reach the white house. Congress is pretty and all but we all know what kind of garbage is in there so I am not hopeful for the socialist future that we all want to happen within 25 years.
All i am saying is. Why was it so fucking hard. To eat your spinach instead of running head first into the fucking bleach.
We all know how bad he is. Yeah we will survive but I rhink I speak for everyone when i say this :
WE DIDN'T NEED HIM BACK !
I AM NOT MAD HARRIS LOST ! I AM MAD TRUMP FUCKING WON !
Everything! Everything this man is saying is so damned true. If you are someone who willingly voted for Trump while knowing what he'll do once he gets in Office again.
Deeply FUCK YOU! If you're a person that refuses to vote against him and didn't do anything to stop him at all than FUCK YA'LL too.
If you are a Muslim or Latino or a Non-Black POC that supported and voted for Trump and are now worried about being deported and banned from the country, I really don't feel sorry for any of ya'll. Some of ya'll non-Black POC countine to showcase that ya'll will always choose White Supremacy and Whiteness at the end of the day while simultaneously voting against your own self interests while still being anti-Black as hell.
You won't get any sympathy from me whatsoever. Ya'll Fuckers wanted this so deal with it.
To the percentage of White Women who yet again let down Black Women & other Women of Color by voting for having less bodily anatomy and less rights than you're great great-grandmother, Ya'll don't deserve any sympathy neither.
Pro-Palestine people, FUCK OFF too. Ya'll are also full of bullshit and have showcased that ya'll truly don't give a Fuck about Palestinians or Gazans lives when you let a raging White supremacist like Trump who have said he'll let Netanyahu " Finish the Job", and will have no remorse or issues Nuking the hell out of both Gaza and Palestine altogether.
Ya'll aren't " activists " of any kind and have shown just how unserious, radicalized, brainwashed extremists ya'll truly are in terms of your so-called " Support ".
To the percentage of brain-dead Black men who also voted for this bastard, I rarely used the N-word in my vocabulary. But ya'll are truly some stupid-ass Nigg*s. You're character as a person is garbage and you are a disgrace to your grandparents and many other Black people of the Civil rights movement who fought and died for your fucking ass and this is how you repay them.
By voting for a White supremacist and beyond racist piece of shit. Ya'll Uncle Tom's or I should say Ruckuses don't deserve any sympathy neither.
The third-party voters and those who wasted their vote on Jill stein as a protest vote, ya'll are the stupidest group of people alive and FUCK ALL OF YA'LL as well.
I've seriously had enough of this shit. I'm tired and sick of being held hostage by the ignorant and stupid and hateful people of this damned country.
I'm just so fucking sick.
Ya'll won't get any sympathy from me if you actually wanted this man in power again or refused to actually vote against him during the election.
You've shown ya'll true characters and how horrible of people ya'll truly are.
Don't expect any sympathy or empathy towards you if you're the one who wanted this to happen.
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arolesbianism · 3 months ago
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Time for more eternal gales isat au, this time featuring Sier as Isabeau, creating a sprite I can never use next to Aris’ because despite my best efforts it would make them look tall
#keese draws#eternal gales#oc#oc art#isat#in stars and time#this one didn’t take nearly as long as the aris one but I think I suffered for it more from the clothes alone#siffrin made me forget I suck at drawing clothes rip#this was also harder because of how much trickier it was to try and adapt siers design to feel fitting enough for my standards#they have a very stylized design compared to most of the others#I kind of took the lazy route out by keeping most of their original shapes in tact but it’s fine#sier in this au would serve the needed role of emotionally intelligent bestie who is also too scared to cross boundaries to do much#but despite this I do think they’d actually get the suspicion quest in this au#mostly because mase is a furry artist not a nerd and sier would be more likely to look at aris and go bro. are you in a fucking timeloop.#it also differs in that aris doesn’t yell at sier abt it instead looping before they can finish because she can’t handle hearing them be#right on the money about this thing that she thought she was handling perfectly#she doesn’t want to fail them she doesn’t want them to realize she’s failed them she doesn’t want to be a burden she doesn’t want them to#‘realize’ they’re better off without her#aris is Incredibly resistant to accepting help on most serious issues because shes convinced that it’s her responsibility to deal with it#by herself and that if she can’t then she’s a failure and worse than useless#I mean in canon eternal gales she literally loses her eye and arm because of that#in this au she just lost them how sif lost his eye but she still has. complexes abt all that.#but yeah sier also differs wildly from isa in many Many other ways as does the rest of the cast from their assigned characters#for sier they rly aren’t the jock of the group at all instead being more of the guy who keeps the mood lighthearted at all times lest they#die of stress because the others haven’t said anything in a whole 30 seconds#aka they’re the self assigned peacekeeper who doesn’t actually need to constantly keep the peace because no one’s fighting but they still#feel like they need to so they dance and dance and dance for their friends until they collapse from exhaustion#metaphorically ofc#this is why they’re both terrified to confront aris when she starts acting a bit fucked up but also why they still do sometimes anyways#they talk abt this a lil bit in their friend quest as they talk abt how they want to change but are scared to
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dnangelic · 5 months ago
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ppl hate that dark always has a pathetic side they dont want to see it they think its ooc they hate that daisuke in all his insecurities, in all his clumsiness and plainness, is, yes, in fact, absolute, 100% him, they refuse to reconcile the truth with the performance they only ever want the facade the charm they don't actually care about dark's feelings and this is why i'll fight to the death for my pathetic dark rights
#*・゚⊰ 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐒. ⊱ ✦ › OUT.#not a single day doesn't go by where i don't think about tainbocualinge's post on POTO#'people are so disappointed that the phantom is just a dude- they're so taken by the phantom's aesthetics that they can't#reconcile them with the person behind the mask and try to make him cooler. competent. more charming. mysterious. even without the crutch#of the mask#that it becomes a very on-brand kind of story bc the whole point. the ENTIRE point was that phantom's aesthetics are so impeccable#bc he's compensating for how much of a pathetic nobody he is'#'the story. the aesthetic stsatement of it all would not be as strong if the person behind the mask was anyone at all.'#LIKE!!!!!!!!!!#IM GOING TO LOSE EVERYTHING#the absolute most painful part is how the anime missed this entirely?? ?it dug its own grave bc it DID try to make dark#the more competent sexy whatever tf one + made daisuke useless/'separate' BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINTTTTTT#ITS LITERALLY NOT DARK IN THERE#IDGAF A BOUT THE ANIME WWHATSOEVER I WISH IT DIDNT EXIST!!!#WHERES MY FREAK WORKING IT SENSITIVE STYLE IN THE CLUB THT HES EXCRUCIATINGLY DETACHED FROM!!!!#this is why i keep saying too you can't separate them!!! you can't have 'just' dark or 'just' daisuke and i hate when people try to do that#YOU CAN'T SEPARATE DARK FROM DAISUKE OR DAISUKE FROM DARK BECAUSE THEY MAKE UP THESE HALVES!! THESE PARTS!!!#THEY'RE INDEPENSIBLE!! THEY'RE EACH OTHER JUST AS THEY'RE EACH OTHER'S EMOTIONAL/THEMATIC PARALLELS#NOT A SINGLE THING DAISUKE'S SAID WASN'T ALSO DARK'S FEELINGS IN THE END!!!
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du-hjarta-skulblaka · 7 months ago
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So yeah avoiding my phone didn't work and also meant I sat on the kitchen floor staring into space for about 3 hours before Alfie woke up but hey at least I didn't break anything
Them being around is helping a little but they're also struggling and it fuckin sucks bc I know we're both just. Rotating money stress in our minds
#like. i went out earlier to get bread#just bread bc we cant afford anything else#got just enough in the bank to cover the work thing but since management stjll hasnt gotten back to me on HOW to pay it its like#our electricity is already in debt lol it has a thing where you can go £10 into debt before it switches off#and it usually wont switch off over weekends#presumably bc all but 1 places nearby thst we can top it up at are shut on weekends but anyway#so we're like. okay. it MIGHT last today and if it does thst SHOULD mean itll last till monday.#but then itll be at least a tenner in debt#then we only have to last till thursday but its. do we keep this money thats for The Thing that is once again unclear on how urgent it is#or do we spend it on the Soon To Be Immdiately Urgent thing#and thats not even CONSIDERING food lmao we. i got 2 loaves of bread so we can at least survive on toast for a few days#we got 3 maybe 4 meals worth of stuff still in the kitchen#like...at this point i dont even care if i have to go a few days without eating at all to make it to thursday but its.#its so fucked up those are the terms im thinking in#and this isnt asking for more donations i really cannot take that today im at the fuckin bottom of my barrel#and already feel hopeless and useless and an active drain to everything around me#but its. like. how. why. why is it still like this. why is it looking extremely unlikely its ever gonna change.#whats the point if its all for a few scattered handful hours of actual peace and comfort never mind happiness#tldr yes i am once again suicidal but small s#like in the sense of i would feel immense relief if a truck came at me on my way to work tomorrow and would not step out of the way but#dont have it in me to actually consciously act upon
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bloodypeachblog · 1 year ago
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This will go amazing with my bathtub that is just full of eyeballs
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sensitivegoblin · 2 months ago
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Vent
Tw: SH and su!c!de
#:(#another day of feeling useless#my life is going by and all i do is rot :(#i just want God to posess me with an Angel so i can be done failing my family#im so broken i need to talk to someone but my dad n sister cant help me :(#im just so fucking lonely and i treat therpy like a drug fix like im in hives waiting for thursday#my sister is too cold and my dad just...cant not say the wrong thing#i think im gonna have to SH to avoid a meltdown :(#i dont like doing it chs i get so fuckin itchy#but i have 0 outlet#....well#my therapist told me to use sex as an outlet#but i really dont wanna do that right now#s-x is about loving yourself and rn i hate myself so badly#sh just lets me open up cus im literally physical breaking at the seams cus of how much i keep to myself#its just not right to unload my stuff onto friends or helpless family#especially since my shit has no answers or hopr#i mostly just wanna be held#the only reason im not attempting to end it all is cus i already know what a burden a failed attempt causes#i xant watch anything or do anything without zoning out minutes later.....#all i can do is spiral and sleep#im just so fucking sad i hate this life i wanna start over i keep failing evrryone around me#i wanna be posessed by an agel so my soul can rest but my body can now actually take care of evrryonr#i dunno what to do :(#my dad says the hospital isnt a good idea but im so fucking sad n tired n wanna die#it feels like no one actually takes me seriously cus ive never sucessfully tried or been to the hospital#feels like my family thinks im lazy depressed imstead of very deeply depressed#everytime my dad says “youre looking for an answer thats not you.” or “i guess i gotta fix things without you” I WANNA FUCKIN DIE#i wanna rip my whole skin off n jjst die....thats how he sees me..#..
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ursuguru · 7 months ago
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𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒, fetishes & turn ons . . . 𝐎𝐇 𝐌𝐘 .ᐟ
⭑ SYNOPSIS [ wc﹐893 ] gojo, geto, toji, sukuna & what i think some of their kinks would be.
⭑ CONTENT [ mdni﹐dead dove ] afab! reader. oral (f), overstimulation, p in v, begging, teasing, praise & degrading, cockwarming, slight somnophilia, daddy kink, nippleplay, consensual non con.
GOJO . . . enjoys overstimulation, especially when it comes to giving you head. your clit is already sensitive to the touch, so much so that he cannot place a finger on your bare clit without you gasping and squirming, shooting sensations pulsing from that area. he has to rub you over your clitoral hood, so that there’s at least a soft, cushiony barrier between your most sensitive parts, and his roughened thumb; but when it comes to his mouth, it’s just heavenly. the way he laps you up, tongue peeking into your hole as deep as it will go, pushing in a finger as his mouth works on your clit, sucking and swirling. after a bit, you start to get overwhelmed, the sensations coming from your abdomen making you squirm almost out of his grip. “mmhnnn.” satoru shakes his head slightly, wrapping strong arms around your already shaking thighs. “please, no more, i can’t take it.” you plead with him, just before his mouth releases your clit with a wet and sloppy ‘pop’ before telling you, “you’ll take as much as i want you to. you’re mine.” viciously sucking at you until you’ve came, again and again.
GETO . . . likes cockwarming. sometimes it was while he was on the game, noticing you walking around the house in damn near nothing, whistling to get your attention. he would pull his shorts down just enough, motioning for you to come sit on his lap. of course you had no issue with this, discarding your panties to go sit on his lap, with his cock buried deep inside of you. sometimes you would wiggle around and earn a harsh slap to your ass, or what he could reach of it. other times he was thrusting into you after losing, or even winning a match. you didn’t mind, as long as he was giving you attention. sometimes cockwarmimg geto was a little different, like when he is tired and needy, snuggling with you in bed. he can feel your ass pressed against him, and whether you were trying or not, you made him hard. sometimes he will pull off his shorts, sticking the tip against you and if you’re wet enough, it slides right in. you can hear him hum softly, settling in, feeling the warmth of your walls, he wraps his arms around you to sleep for the night. once he wakes in the morning, and realizes his cock is still hard and inside of you, he fucks you awake.
TOJI . . . has a daddy kink, ironically. it started off as just a joke, him calling himself big daddy, or telling you he was your daddy; and at first, you didn’t know how to feel about it, but weeks of thinking, and possibly some subliminal conditioning from your lovely, perverted boyfriend had changed your mind. “do it, slut.” he was hovered over you, tip of his cock pressed against your slick hole, teasing, but only enough to have you frustrated and almost begging. he wouldn’t put it in until— “say it.” he demanded of you, hand coming up to grip your soft cheeks, keeping your focus on him. you wanted to, but it felt so foreign on your tongue, saying it when you were alone just to get a taste of the word in your mouth. “daddy?” you finally let it slip, your voice light and airy, the word coming out almost as if it were a question. “that’s it, good. say it again, like you mean it.” less demanding this time, but he still wouldn’t put it in until he was satisfied, and he could tell it was bothering you. the way you wiggled your hips and tried your best to push yourself down onto his cock, but it was useless in that position, lying on your back you were helpless beneath him. “daddy please.” this time it sounded better, more natural as the words just fell off of your tongue, begging him to finally wreck you; to which he did, until you were a crying and cumming mess.
SUKUNA . . . likes cnc. he rather enjoys watching you squirm and cry beneath him, begging for him to stop. you’ve already established a safeword, and he always confirms it before going into a scene; knowing that if that word fell from your lips, he would stop immediately. “baby, what’s your safeword?” he asks you, and once you respond he begins to push himself onto you, feeling up your thighs, squishing soft skin and pushing his rough fingers between the warmth of them. “please..” you whimper, knowing it turns him on to hear you beg. he ignores you, his free hand pulling your tank top down to reveal your chest and already budding nipples. with his head dipping down to put one in his mouth, his other hand worked his way up your thighs and right against your panties. “please, stop!” you protest, gasping at the feeling of his teeth, nipping and sucking before releasing their grip, his fingers down below pushing past the fabric of lace, plunging themselves into your sweet dripping hole. “you know you want this, that’s why you don’t fight me.” the man snickered at your obedience, the way your hole clenched around his fingers when he spoke. “relax, enjoy this.” he hums, pumping his fingers in and out until you’re begging for him to let you cum.
© ursuguru 2024. do not copy.
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loveanddeepthroat · 3 months ago
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Baby Blues
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Pairing - Sylus x f!MC
Summary - In the first two weeks of being new parents, the dynamic hasn’t been quite what you and Sylus expected. He’s eager to be involved, but your daughter doesn’t seem to have warmed to him.
Word count - 2.7k
⚠️Warning⚠️ - Mentions of pregnancy and childbirth. Hurt/comfort, fluff, and a little sprinkle of angst.
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Your newborn didn’t like Sylus.
It sounded ridiculous, but you know he was thinking it too. You didn’t have the gall to say it out loud—not that it even needed to be said. The fact was definitely lingering between you both.
You never thought much of why she would wriggle and kick up a storm in your stomach whenever he touched the swell of your belly, but you now had an inclination that it was because she didn’t like his hands there.
It was strange and upsetting, but he didn’t seem too hurt by it so far, only silently helpless as he watched you do everything. You were two weeks postpartum, so your emotions were already all over the place. It seemed as though Sylus was holding his own feelings back to make room for yours, and when you had asked him about it, he simply kissed your forehead and reassured you that he was fine. All while your screaming daughter cried for you against his chest.
Not that he opened up to you all that often. You did manage to get things out of him with a push sometimes, but he was like an unyielding gate, refusing to open to anyone.
Your exhaustion was only adding to the toll on your fragile emotions. The baby only wanted your touch, and sleep was almost impossible for you because of that very reason. Only you could feed her. Only you could soothe her. Only you could touch her.
That was one thing that was really getting to Sylus. The bloodshot whites of your eyes as you rocked the fussy newborn to sleep and fed her at all hours of the morning. The barely touched plates of food that ended up stone cold and in the bin. Not to mention the completely non-existent ten minutes you needed to at least have a wash without having to run out of the shower to her aid.
He must have felt quite useless in the weeks where you should be recovering, but he didn’t want you to worry about his feelings by indulging you in his thoughts. 
Your pregnancy had been smooth, ending with a good twenty-seven hours of rather torturous labour, and pushing that went on for an agonising two hours. It had all been worth it, though. Your little bundle of joy with tufts of platinum hair had finally greeted you both with a piercing wail, but eased her protests once placed against your heaving chest.
You just wished she would settle with both parents.
It was another day of desperate wailing, your arms becoming so heavy with the exertion of having no option but to hold her. You tried to put her in her pram for Sylus to push her around for a while, but her cries only increased to the point of her little face turning purple. You couldn’t sit and just listen to it, and you absolutely would not ignore her—no matter how much Sylus pushed for you to go and get some sleep.
“She wants me,” you say for what felt like the millionth time that week.
Sylus was evidently reluctant to stop trying, but he wouldn’t keep you from her. He conceded with a defeated huff, watching your every move as you gently lifted your screeching daughter out of the plush pram. Her screams died down quickly as you placed her against your chest, her ear-piercing wails whittling down to soft whimpers.
“Of all the dangerous paths I’ve crossed and violent challenges I’ve encountered, it’s our newborn daughter who finally defeats me,” he mumbles quietly, trying to make a lighthearted joke about it.
You tried to smile at his attempt to add a bit of humour to the situation, but the comment only made you cry. Hard.
“Hey.” He immediately stepped toward you, rubbing a large hand up and down your back soothingly. You had to give it to him, his patience with you in the last two weeks had been immaculate. “Don’t cry, sweetie.”
You couldn’t stop, your ragged breaths and shaking shoulders refusing to relent. “I d-don’t get it,” you bawl. “What are we doing d-differently?”
Sylus sighed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. His hand continued to rub soothing circles against your back to ease your upset. “Well, she did live inside you for nine months. Besides, you didn’t exactly like me either when we first met.”
He smiled faintly, tilting his head down to capture your gaze. Despite the obvious tease, he still seemed to be holding himself back. It was frustrating him more than he wanted to admit to you. You knew he was protecting your feelings, but you wished he would just show some sense of vulnerability.
You don’t dare set your sleeping daughter down in her moses basket, knowing full well that she would just wake straight back up. So the rest of the afternoon is spent with your tiny newborn curled up against your chest, a few feeding and changing breaks in between.
Once the day turned into night, nothing in the world sounded more appealing to you than a hot shower, a hot meal, and a hot cup of tea. But letting her scream and cry while you did that was not an option. It wasn’t fair on her, and it wasn’t fair on Sylus.
He didn’t leave you unless he absolutely had to throughout the day. You watched him every time he heard a little whimper from the baby, his hands flexing and twitching. Every time you had to get up to do something for her, he was either at your back or side.
He wanted to help.
The chef brought through a very large bowl of marinated chicken and pasta for you, upon Sylus’s instruction. As soon as the bowl was set on the little table beside your recliner chair, you almost began drooling. You hadn’t managed to eat much at all in the chaos, and Sylus wasn’t amused when you didn’t even get the chance to finish the two biscuits he’d brought you earlier in the day.
You reached a careful hand over to the fork, not even lifting it before your daughter began to wriggle and whine in your other arm. Dropping it immediately, you retract your hand, only making it halfway back to the fussy newborn before long, slender fingers wrapped themselves around your wrist.
“No,” Sylus says firmly. “Absolutely not.”
Your initial response is to immediately go on the defence. “She’s cry—”
“I know she’s crying,” he interrupted tightly. “I know. But you’re going to eat while your food is hot, and you’re going to do it without our screaming daughter on your chest.”
“But—” 
“No buts.”
He had that commanding look in his eye, the one that would intimidate most, but was only used on you when he was especially adamant on you doing something necessary for yourself. 
You were a little relieved to see him so passionate, if you were being honest. He had been treading on eggshells to not upset you or the baby for fourteen whole days, and it wasn’t good for anyone. You felt the tension on him every time you both managed to get into bed together for more than five minutes. He needed this little outburst.
“This needs to stop now. I’m going to figure her out, and you are going to eat. Alright?” His tone left no room for argument, and the more your daughter protested against your intention to eat, the more hungry and tired you felt.
It wasn’t easy, but you handed her off to him carefully, swallowing a lump in your throat. You couldn’t take your eyes off of her distressed little face as Sylus attempted to cradle her.
You were practically twitching, your legs about to push the footrest of the recliner down to retrieve her in the first thirty seconds she was away from you. Sylus noticed immediately, and pushed it back up with his foot before you could close it down fully.
“She’s not in any danger,” he said calmly, but his whole body was visibly tense. “She’s right here, I won’t leave the room. Just eat, sweetie.”
You wanted to protest further, but he wasn’t going to yield this time. His eyes remained trained on you until you finally sagged back into the chair, and it wasn’t until you picked up your fork that he finally turned away, focusing on the distraught newborn kicking up a storm against his chest.
He held her the way you did, one hand cupped over her head to keep it steady while the other hand softly patted her back. Why she didn’t want to be near him was an utter mystery to you, he wasn’t doing anything incorrectly. 
You couldn’t eat while the two most important people in your life were quite clearly in a distressing situation before you. “Are you alright?” You asked him gently, hoping that he would answer you.
“I will be if you eat,” he quickly responded, not looking at you.
Sighing, you stab a slice of the chicken onto your fork, just looking at it for a moment. Your brain had managed to kick itself into gear as you forged a new approach to his silence. 
This was an opportunity to head in the right direction.
“I’ll eat if you speak to me.”
Blood red eyes shot in your direction, an eyebrow raised. “Blackmail?”
You quickly shook your head. “You were right, this does need to stop. Starting with you shutting yourself off from me.” 
“Eat.”
The forked piece of chicken points straight at his unamused face. “Talk.”
He shook his head a little in clear annoyance, the stress consuming him. Your daughter continued to wail, immune to the warmth and safety of his arms. He was basically trapped after promising to remain in the room with you.
Your bleary eyes held his irises of rubies, neither of you conceding. It was a mental challenge to ignore the fragrant aroma of garlic and fresh basil beneath your nose, but you were not eating until at least one of the two beautiful people before you had calmed down.
Sylus visibly swallowed, finally giving in as he noticed your lack of a bluff. “Do you think she knows?” His voice was quiet, barely heard over your newborn’s cries.
“Knows what?”
He opened his mouth to speak, but shut it again, nodding his head towards the piece of chicken on your fork. You shovel it into your gob, eager for him to continue.
His eyes flicker down to your daughter before he speaks again. “Do you think she knows that I’ve done terrible things? Do you think that’s why she doesn’t like me?”
“I—” you grumble and roll your eyes as he nods to your plate of food again, waiting for you to take another mouthful that you end up having to speak through, “I don’t see how she could. Is that why you’ve been so quiet?”
The corner of his mouth curled upward ever-so-slightly. “Missing my tongue, kitten?”
You couldn’t help your own smile as his shoulders sagged a little from where they were practically touching his ears. It wasn’t often that he opened up to you like this. You almost always had to pry or throw in a proposition to coax him into speaking.
You took another bite of your food, moving the plate from the small table to your lap. “Do you really think she doesn’t like you?”
His smirk faded away quickly, a gentle thumb brushing over your daughter's head. She continued to cry, but the volume had dropped a little. “Do you not think that?” He asked.
You didn’t know how to answer that question. To tell the truth, you did think that, but not for the same reason he was thinking.
“I think she may be a little attached at the moment. We’re very different shapes and sizes. Maybe she feels—”
“Unsafe?” 
His tone had dropped an octave—something you didn’t think was possible considering the already bone-chilling vibrations of his voice. Never before had you witnessed him in a state of such vulnerability. He was insecure about this, and it was finally starting to show.
You went to stand up to be near him, but he immediately stepped forward to halt your movement.
“Eat.”
Not wanting to lose this free-speaking Sylus you had barely met before, you did as he said, twirling a fat mouthful of pasta onto your fork for extra brownie points.
You both remained in silence for a few moments, only your fork scraping against the bowl in your lap marrying with the sounds of your baby’s cries surrounding the small sitting room.
Sylus’s gaze didn’t leave the newborn cradled in his arms, a gentle sway in his hips as he tried to keep her moving. All you could do was study his composure, seeing it as it cracked.
After a moment, he looked back at you. “I don’t want to keep failing you.”
You coughed on the mouthful of the creamy pasta at his words, completely in awe of his confession.
Failing you? How did he get to that conclusion?
“You’ve done everything for her,” he continued, not allowing you to immediately reassure him. “I want to be able to do everything, too. For both of you.”
The all too familiar sting in your wet eyes built in intensity by the second, and you quickly found yourself sniffling.
Not only was he insecure about your daughter not feeling safe in his arms, but he felt that he’d failed you both in the past two weeks. It was heartbreaking for you to hear.
“Don’t cry—”
“You’re…fuck, Sylus. You’re not failing anyone,” you tuck your fork back into the pasta with a loud sniffle, ignoring his glare that silently demanded that you continue to eat. “How the hell did you come to that conclusion?”
He looked entirely reluctant to answer, his head dropping back down to stare at his tiny twin. You didn’t want him to stop speaking again, so you quietly picked your fork back up, hoping it would capture his attention.
The silence stretched between you as you made the effort to eat for his sake. Even your daughter's cries became a little weaker—like she was pitying him.
He didn’t look at you as he said, “I’m the bad guy. The boogie man. The kind of monster that parents threaten their kids with visits from in the middle of the night if they don’t brush their teeth before bed.”
“Not in our story, you’re not,” you quickly reassured him earnestly. “You’re the husband and father who keeps the monsters away from your family. That’s the only Sylus she will ever know. The real one.”
He still didn’t look up from the newborn, now almost completely silent in his arms, but you catch a subtle bob in his throat. You didn’t need him to respond to you. You knew you had said the right words to soothe that self-deprecating thought in his complicated mind. You could see it.
“Have I told you how perfect you were two weeks ago,” he asked, knowing full well that he’d told her every day since then.
Your mouth curled into a soft smile. Even after all these years together—after welcoming your first child into this scary, yet beautiful world—Sylus had no trouble giving you butterflies.
“I think you might’ve mentioned it,” you hummed softly.
And on that very note, the baby was fast asleep in his hold for the very first time in two whole weeks. His face didn’t reveal anything, but you knew he was relieved. All he wanted to do was make this easier for the both of you.
Finally, you had managed to figure out what the problem had been all this time.
“You were too tense,” you point out quietly, noticing how openly at ease he now was. “That’s what she didn’t like.”
He hummed in response, unable to tear his gaze away from the sleeping babe in his arms. You didn’t say anything further, letting him enjoy that special moment in peace while you proceeded to enjoy the rest of your meal.
Despite the challenges of becoming new parents, things were going to be alright from that point onwards.
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A/N - Hello! I hope you enjoyed this oneshot, thank you so much for reading. Just to let you know, I do take requests ❤️
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lov-3-rs · 2 months ago
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Let’s be Honest
Simon Riley (Bodyguard) x Reader!!
(mdni 18+)
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Your father is an undercover investigator working a dangerous case on a human trafficking ring. Unfortunately, they somehow discovered his intentions, and now they're out for revenge. So, they’ve put a bounty on your head, claiming you’re worth millions to whoever is able to find you and sell you to the best bidder. Despite the danger, your father can’t abandon his mission as there were other lives on the line. He’s too close to cracking the case, rescuing the victims. To protect you, he hired someone no one would see coming for them and that was going to be protecting you. He hired a Ghost.
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The moment you saw the brute, you couldn’t believe it. This 6’3”, 220lb, constantly masked man was supposed to be by your side for who knows how long. The sheer size of him was intimidating enough, but the mask? It kept you wondering what kind of man was beneath it.
You couldn’t argue with your father, though. He wanted you safe, and you weren’t about to be taken and sold off to some creep. So, you dealt with it. But now it’s been two months too long. Two damn months of constant monitoring, endless rules, and the same warnings: 'You need to listen to me Y/n,' 'Stay by my side,' or ‘It’s not safe.' It was honestly getting sickening at the fact he had complete control over your day to day life now.
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
“I was thinking of going shopping today, get some fresh air,” you say, taking a bite of your breakfast. He stands near the window, eyes scanning the street outside like he always does. “Maybe,” he says, his voice low, almost disinterested. You roll your eyes. “Jesus Christ, why not? It’s just us walking down the street, Simon.”
You started using his real name after weeks of pestering him to tell you. It felt weird calling him “Ghost” all the time—like something out of a video game. What good was being around someone this long if you didn’t even know their name?
He glances back at you, his expression unreadable behind the mask—if there’s an expression at all. Then, just as silently, he turns back to the window. “You never know.” You put your fork down and stop eating, “Simon, I can’t keep going days without stepping foot outside, i’m literally going insane”, he steps away from the window and pulls a chair out to sit beside you. “Everything I do and everything I say is to protect you, that is the whole reason I am here”. you looked into his hauntingly dead eyes. “Please you can’t keep me trapped in these walls”. You say with hesitation in your voice wondering if this will be another useless plea to let him agree for you to get out the house. He paused for a moment before nodding his head in agreement. You smile, “oh my gosh really? we can go?!” you say quickly standing from your chair in excitement. “yes. but the moment I feel something is off we leave, immediately” he says sternly. You were already putting your plate away and running to your room to get ready.
You visited a few of your favorite stores near your house, picking up small items here and there. Simon stayed close, as usual, walking silently beside you. As you stepped out of another shop, he leaned in slightly, his voice low. “We’re going to one more store, then we’re heading home. Do you understand?” You shot him a side-eye but nodded, not in the mood for another argument.
The last stop was the lingerie shop—you had been eyeing their new fall line for weeks. You grabbed a few panties and bras before something else caught your eye: the most stunning, sexy set you’d ever seen. You had to try it on. Walking into the dressing room, you slipped out of your clothes and into the delicate lace set. The fabric felt luxurious against your skin. You peeked your head out, only seeing Simon waiting, his posture as stoic as ever. You stepped out to check yourself in the mirror, admiring the way the set hugged your curves. From the corner of his eye, Simon caught sight of you. His jaw clenched almost immediately as he tried to keep his focus elsewhere, but it was impossible. He’d been around you every day for two months, and he had seen plenty—your tight shirts with no bra, shorts that barely covered anything. He’d always kept his cool, reminding himself that you were off-limits, and he took care of himself whenever you were asleep or when he took a shower. But seeing you now, in something so revealing, stirred something deeper in him that made his jeans tighten. He forced himself to remain still, but the tension in his body betrayed his thoughts. Respect for your father, the job—those were the only things keeping him from acting on what he felt. And he had to keep it that way, or at least he was trying to.
You caught Simon’s gaze in the mirror, and for a moment, the air between you seemed to shift. His eyes were unreadable behind the mask, but you could feel something he wasn’t saying. You quickly looked away, clearing your throat. “What do you think?” you asked casually, but your pulse quickened. You didn’t know why you even asked—it wasn’t like you cared what he thought about lingerie. Or did you?
He blinked, caught off guard. “About what?”
“The lingerie,” you teased, crossing your arms. “I thought I’d get a professional opinion.” His jaw tightened more, but you caught the flicker of something in his eyes. “You don’t need my opinion.” You stepped a little closer, testing his boundaries. “Maybe I do.” He stayed still, but you could see the tension in his stance. His voice, when he spoke, was low. “You’re making this harder than it needs to be.” You laughed lightly. “What? Shopping?” His eyes met yours, and for a second, there was nothing but silence between you. “No,” he said softly, almost reluctantly. “This.” The weight of his words hung in the air. For a moment, neither of you moved. His response was a beat too slow. “You should hurry up,” he muttered, his voice deeper than usual. You rolled your eyes, but his tone made your skin tingle. There was something about the way he held himself that made you wonder—did he see you the way you were starting to see him? You slipped back into the dressing room to change, but the tension lingered, thick in the air. When you came out, dressed again, Simon stood up immediately, his shoulders tense. “Let’s go.” The rest of the walk home was quiet, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that something between you had shifted.
You walked into the house, setting your bags down and slipping off your shoes. Simon followed closely behind, immediately locking the door and heading to the windows like he always did, scanning the outside for any sign of danger. But your mind was elsewhere, replaying that one word—this—over and over again.
What did ‘it’ mean? You had to know.
“Simon,” you called out softly, still unable to meet his eyes. “What did you mean earlier?” He stiffened immediately, turning to face you. He knew exactly what you were talking about, but he’d been hoping you would let it go. He didn’t mean to let that word slip out, and now he was trying to think of a way around it. “What do you mean?” His tone was even, but there was a slight edge to it, a hint of tension. You swallowed, gathering your courage. “You said I was making this hard. I’m not sure what that means… I want you to tell me.” Finally, you looked up at him, meeting his gaze. For a moment, Simon just stared at you, his jaw clenching and unclenching like he was fighting with himself. His silence hung in the air, thick and heavy, as though he was weighing whether or not to tell you the truth. He turned back to the window, staring outside as if it would give him the answer he needed. “You’re making my job harder,” he said after a long pause, but there was something in his voice—a hesitation. But you had a smirk on your face knowing exactly what it was, “it was the set wasn’t it?” there was a pause, “you thought I looked good, too good right?” you stepped closer to him testing his limits wanting more reaction out of him. “I think you should keep this fantasy shit to yourself” he said quickly snapping back at you, but you kept pushing, “I don’t blame you Simon, I bet it’s been months since you got laid and I won’t lie it’s been a hot minute for me too with you being around me all the time, having me cooped in this house” you can see his brows furrowing. “you’re crossing the god damn line” that’s what he was saying but the raging boner in his pants said completely different about your attitude.
Before you knew it, he was stepping toward you, his hand gripping your arm firmly. “You’re pushing me too far,” he said, his voice low and rough. You met his gaze, feeling a mix of fear and excitement. “Maybe I need you to push back,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. The moment was charged, and without warning, one of his hands let go from your arm to lift up his mask above his nose exposing his lips. your eyes widen never seeing anything but his eyes for the last few months. Before you knew it his lips were on yours, It was intense and consuming, leaving both of you breathless and more entangled than before.
He picked you up and put you on the dining table. the kiss became more passionate with his hands tangled in your hair, you could feel your core throb waiting to be touched. Simon pulled away from you and looked into your eyes, “you don’t understand how long i’ve wanted to touch you” he says breathing heavily. “all those times you walked around with no bra and I could see your fucking nipples through your shirt and the times you walked around with your ass out, god I wanted to bend you over, i’d fuck you right there and don’t even forget about the times I could here you moaning in the shower doing god knows what to that pussy, ya fuckin minx” your cunt was practically dripping at his words, your breathing became more heavier, “Then do it Simon, bend me over and fuck me” before you could say anymore he already was turning you over on the counter and pulling your pants down. “already planning on it love”. Simon pulled your pants down then slowly pulled your panties down revealing your wet pussy. he bent down to get eye level with it bring his fingers up to your folds and playing with your clit. You moaned at his touched, “fuh-fuck”. Simon pulled his fingers away and replaced it with his tongue, licking your throbbing clit and making you squirm.
He ate you out till you came on his mouth, “Si please”. Simon got up and looked at your bent over form while he started unbuckling his pants, “please what love?” he already knew what you wanted and he wanted it just as bad. “fuck me hard” he smiled at your words taking his hard cock in his hand rubbing his pre cum all over the top of his head giving it extra lubricant. He aligned his cocked to your hole and slammed into you making you jump, “Shhhhhhhit” you hiss out the word from the painful pleasure. He started to thrust in and out of you hearing your moans made him want to cum already but he couldn’t, it felt too damn good to stop now. Simon bent down to your ear, “All those fuckin times you were playing with this tight cunt in the shower, who were you thinkin about huh?”. You didn’t want to answer out of embarrassment but you did it anyways, “y-you si, I thought about sucking your cock and you cumming all over my tits” that snapped something in him when you said that, his pace picked up he started fucking you harder, his balls slapping against your clit. “what would ya daddy think of the man he hired to protect you fucking your pussy raw?”. You could feel your self about to cum, “Si I’m gonna cum on your cock” his thrust became sloppier feeling himself about to finish too, “cum baby, cum”. Simon thrusted harder into your cunt making your back arch more and your ass jiggle against his hips the sight was pushing him over the edge, “god damn baby i’m gonna to cum” his hands gripped into your hips harder. “Simon cum inside me god please”. He busted a load in you, pushing his cock feel in you making sure nothing came out, “fuckin hell”.
After the intensity of the moment subsided, Simon and you lay there in the aftermath, the room now quiet except for your shared breathing. He gently brushed a strand of hair from your face, his touch tender. “I didn’t plan for this,” Simon said softly, his voice filled with a mixture of regret and affection. “I never wanted to cross that line.” You turned to face him, your own emotions swirling. “Neither did I, but… it felt right in the moment. I just want to know what this means for us.” Simon looked at you with a conflicted expression. “I don’t have all the answers. This situation is complicated, and I’m still trying to figure out how to balance my feelings with my responsibilities.” he says lowly “I understand,” you replied, taking his hand in yours. “I just need to know where we stand. Do you want to try and make this work, or is this something we need to move past?” There was a pause as Simon considered his words. “I care about you more than I should,” he admitted. “But I also need to focus on keeping you safe. We’ll have to navigate this carefully.” You nodded, feeling a mix of relief and uncertainty. “We’ll figure it out together,” you said, squeezing his hand.
“As long as we’re honest with each other.”
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scap34 · 2 months ago
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bottom! sub! virgin! Toji x clan leader! top! sadistic! male reader
Turning your hired gun into your partner <3
warning: cussing, dirty talk, degradation, mild manipulation, loss of virginity, sex
The Zenin elders are stupid. You think idly as you look down. 
Dumb fucks that obviously didn’t notice a gem. You think as you thrust into Toji’s tight hole roughly. The man under you gasped, gritting his teeth, his face scrunched into a twisted expression of pain and pleasure. 
He squirmed away from you, unconsciously. You grabbed his bruised ankle and pulled him closer, a strangled moan left his throat, when your cock fully entered him. 
He clenched the sheets under him, with a white knuckle grip. The corner of his eyes reddened and shiny with tears. His eyes refused to meet your gaze as you leaned down, smirking. 
“Too much? Should I stop?” As expected he shook his head, too stubborn to quit halfway. His body trembled under you.
You leaned back grinning. Your hips rocking into his ass, as you took in every soft whimper and moan that left Toji’s mouth. 
It took all your effort not to hold him down and fuck into his tight virgin hole roughly, leaving your claim on him. To watch him fall apart under you, the big man, so small under you. 
Instead you steeled your will. You wouldn’t let this be a one time thing. From the minute you saw Toji. You need him. Under you, sobbing as you fucked him senseless. 
You knew about Toji. Of course you did. Everyone did, even your clan did. The black sheep of the Zenin family, Toji, was a taboo. 
Fucking stupid idiots. 
When you saw him first, he was trying to steal from you. The darkness had barely let you see the man. But when he stepped into the moonlight you could immediately tell. So you did nothing and watched as he snuck out without a single person noticing. 
After he left you pulled up your phone and placed a hit on a man. 
The next day he walked in through the front door instead of the window. More accurately he burst into your room, and tossed a head at your foot. 
Unseeing eyes met your own. It was the man you placed the hit on. A small-time sorcerer that was looking to go big in the wrong places. You looked up at him amused, crushing the head under your foot. Toji glared at you. 
“Pay up.” He said curtly, tossing the scrolls he stole back to you. You caught them and smiled at him. 
“I have a job for you. Sit down.” You said smirking. He gave you a suspicious glare, but you could see his weary shoulders, the grease in his hair, and the desperation in his eyes. Young and desperate. A perfect combination. “It pays a lot.” 
He sat down. 
It was absurdly easy to keep him close to you. A bodyguard post you said to him. He didn’t question it. No one in your clan questioned it. No one would. Other than your brother, you were the strongest. Being a clan leader had its benefits.
It was even easier to seduce him. A few gentle touches, soft glances and forgotten towels, and he was wrapped around your finger. All but crawling into your lap when you called pretty and selling his body to you with false reluctance. 
You hadn’t had the heart to tell him how his eyes betrayed his words. When he looked at you with such trust craving validation, all you wanted to do was to fuck him until you were all he could think about. 
So here you were, pinning the poor man to the bed, taking his virginity. You pulled your cock halfway out and thrust it into his hole. Toji bit his lip and whimpered, muscular thigh flexing like he wanted to break free. But he wouldn’t, they stayed in place, calves hooked on your shoulder exposing his pretty pink hole.
You leaned down, hovering over him. Kissing his tits, you licked his nipple. He arched into your mouth, moaning. His useless cock twitched against his stomach. 
“I’m gonna fuck you now.” You muttered against his chest, pulling out your cock and slamming it into his hole before he could respond. 
He let out a strangled moan, pretty face scrunched up as he let out muffled sobs. You could take it slower, let him adjust before you fucked him, but you wouldn’t.
It wouldn’t change the way his cock hardened, leaking pre-cum against his stomach. You rolled your hips, watching him twitch and clutch down on your cock with a moan. Large hands gripping your sheets tightly as he whined, so sweetly.
Face flushed, with moans slipping from swollen pink lips, he was a sight. Your sight. Yours to toy with, yours to protect, and yours to fuck. 
His body was so perfectly slutty despite being a virgin. his greedy hole sucking you in, begging for you. He was meant for you, to be yours. And now he is all yours now. All for a measly 50,000 yen. What a steal.
Life, it turned out, was hard without skills other than fighting. He’d gotten kicked out of 4 jobs within a week of leaving the clan. Living on the streets left him feeling more exhausted and dirty. 
If he couldn’t find a job outside jujustu, he’d find one within it. He’d be a killer, a hired gun. 
The offer came from a man who claimed to be a handler with promises of money if he joined. He accepted.
Money, was the fucking leading cause of all things shitty. He decided he needed a fuck ton of it. 
His first job was supposed to be simple: sneak into the Gojo clan and steal a scroll. 
But as it was, nothing would ever work out for him. A man was in the room.  A strong sorcerer too. Toji’s body was tense, expecting an attack at any minute as he took the scroll. 
None came. Instead, the man watched him leave. Curious. He didn’t care. 
His phone rang a few minutes from the meeting spot, in the morning. It was the handler, there was a hit placed on the man who asked him to steal the scrolls. 100,000 yen to kill him and return the scrolls. 
He’d known exactly who’d placed that hit. In the cold morning light, he strolled towards the man and cut off his head and delivered it to you. 
You were crazy or bored. He decided when you offered him a job. The rumors about him weren’t pleasant. He knew that. But here you were, smiling at him with that cunning light in your eyes. You, a sorcerer, that was strong enough to probably kill him. 
He hesitated for a second and thought about his life if he left. He’d probably go to the handler and take more jobs. Lose all the money with his shitty luck and end up living in shitty apartments eating cheap noodles. 
“It pays a lot.” You continued.
He sat down. 
He didn’t even realize when he got so invested in you. 
You were beautiful. It wasn’t just your face, your body was slender compared to him. Soft hands, and lean fingers that seemed to have never touched a weapon. Even the way you dressed was elegant, traditional kimonos and long sleeved shirts. 
He had fallen for you. You, the Gojo heir, a man he should hate. And yet when you brushed your long hair out the way looking frustrated he could do nothing but pull out a clip he brought with his own money and clip it back. 
The smile you gave him, washed away all the coldness he’d felt since his birth. Like all the cold words, sneers and abuse he’d received was gone, healed by a single glance from you. You were a spring waterfall, cold and bottomless, ethereal in the light, beckoning him to you.  
You, and your stupid mind games were all he wanted. So when you gave him a slutry smile and called him pretty, he immediately gave in, offering his body to you for 50,000 yen. He was worth less than that. He thought, distantly, as your hands settled in his hips. But he could never afford you. 
You were priceless and he needed you. So he played along. You were stupid to think he was the prize when he clearly won you.
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tuesdayisfordancing · 10 months ago
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“Communicate” is almost entirely meaningless advice 90% of the time so here’s a few slightly more specific but still pretty general ideas:
You might be making assumptions you don’t realize you’re making about what another party knows, remembers, or understands. Saying “obvious” things helps clear some of these up. Of course even while making an effort to do this you still might not notice things you’re assuming go without saying; don’t beat yourself up when you discover one of these, discovering it means you’re improving! It’s like playing Zelda: the more you uncover the more you get a sense for where and how to look for things. (Disclaimer: I’ve never played Zelda.)
You can take breaks. I’m thinking of personal relationships here but there’s probably a way to apply a similar concept to other relationships. You can say talking more is too much right now, that you’re tired, that you need to process, that you won’t be at your best if you keep going. One thing that can be really great in a personal relationship is asking if the other person is up for hitting pause and doing something you enjoy together for a while (they might not be up for it, be prepared). You can also hit pause and take some time to yourself.
Communication isn’t just for problems! Tell people when you like and appreciate what they’re doing!
Okay this one is probably as useless or at least almost as “communicate” but: contextualize but don’t over-contextualize. I have made people think something is a bigger or more urgent deal than it is by not starting with “overall this is fine/I like X/whatever” and I have had people entirely mentally reverse my point because I spent longer on the disclaimer than the point.
Anyway. Communication is an actual set of skills that you don’t just magically improve by hearing that “communication is key” often enough. It doesn’t just take effort it also takes learning, trial and error, examples! And best practices for communication vary among people, cultures, specific relationships, etc. This has been Pet Peeves With Tuesday.
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arolesbianism · 3 months ago
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Eternal gales isat au except Bloom is the one looping and she never fucking escapes due to the curse of being 9 years old. Oh and also the middle aged woman actively sabotaging her at every step of the way ig
#rat rambles#eternal gales#for context in the main version of the au I have au aris as loop and as such in any swapped looper hypotheticals their loops would be their#au antag counterpart and just so happens bloom has by far the worst one to be stuck with#all the other au antags would play varying degrees of nice but au bloom very much Would Not.#au bloom's whole motivation in canon eg was kickstarted by their original universe being destroyed after all#and to have that happen after being stuck in timeloop hell? she would Not be ready to let the universe fuck her over without a fight#and this is only one drop in the bucket of many Many reasons that bloom would have a unquely fucked up and horrific time if she was looping#fydd wouldn't have a great time either but I do think au fydd would be nicer to him no matter how low that bar is#au fydd would be incredibly unstable and angry but he wouldn't necessarily blame fydd for that I think#seeing his literal younger self go through what had broken him as a teenager would probably get him to try to keep it together#he'd understand theyre both victims that got massively fucked over#au sier would probably get closest to loop in terms of helpfulness but probably still less helpful if that gives you any idea of how#useless these fuckers would be like even the ones who would legitimately try would just sorta suck at it I think#owl in particular would probably be Way too stuck in the playing mysterious zone to be very helpful#au fydd just wouldn't know shit nor know how to go about explaining shit#au aris would be very very distant with their advice and take a very mia appreach to things (take a clost look at your evidence esc)#au mase would be dead silent 99% of the time#and as said au bloom would be actively sabotaging everything at any chance she could get#now aris and sier are so nicies to me by having au antags that already have easy loop names#owl already altered her name in canon after all and while uni isnt here au aris can still borrow their name#thank god sier isnt the main character here if the act 6 twist was revealed with sier awf owl full name drop thatd be horrible lol#isat spoilers#justttt realized that I should add that. thats what happens when you post at 4 am ig#speaking of time to pass out
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vanillesprincess · 5 months ago
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how to fix being "ugly" once and for all
hello loves! I have just discovered Mae Alice Suzuki's youtube channel and I fear it is already changing my life!
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I was watching her video and I decided to take a few notes so that I could make a blog post and read her tips whenever I needed it + share them
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In the video, Mae explains how to stop being "ugly", and become a more beautiful person. Being "ugly" is not only about physical looks. First of all, I personally believe no one is actually ugly, but everyone has the potential, the right and the capability of reaching the best version of themselves!
Being "ugly" is about not feeling beautiful mentally, and it affects our physical body, environment and behavior. If you hate yourself, hate other people, engage in useless drama and you're always complaining about life and others, this might be for you.
Dear, you have to realize than if instead of improving yourself, you keep hating others... this is going against you. Beautiful people have a beautiful personality, first of all. This is what makes them beautiful.
the body attracts and reflects the ugly vibes, desperation, hatred you put out in the world
if you are convinced that you are ugly, you're realizing that assumption. this is no magic: if you're convinced of it, you probably will never even consider yourself potentially beautiful, you won't consider your body worthy of care, and you will never improve
So... time to change!
In order to change reality, you need to change your thoughts, which will help changing your habits.
Change your "I AM" mindset and speech: don't absorb negative energy of others and do not put out negative energy
Branding yourself as beautiful: you are BEAUTIFUL. own it. most people are not born ugly or beautiful, but people "brand" themselves as ugly or beautiful. believe you're beautiful and ACT LIKE IT!
Caring about yourself: this involves hygiene, diet. it's easy and simple. this is the basis
Own your natural self: think that you're beautiful, own it, and you will become beautiful without implementing unnatural change that is not authentic for you. being unnatural means you are insecure and afraid of yourself. the beauty standards change all the time, so you only actually need to be authentic and take care of yourself. this also means you will naturally become confident
Understand what works best for you: a lot of people that are attractive don't appear like so because they do not know what works best for them, they wear whatever is trendy even when it doesn't make them feel good by reflecting their personal style. Use, consume and wear what makes you feel good + fits you
You just need to learn: learn how to put make up on in strategic points, learn your best angles for pics, what works best for your body and face shapes
most importantly, looks are not everything. if you are not attracted to yourself, doesn't mean that people don't find you pretty. you just need to appreciate yourself more, really!
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