#how did you get here!! who subbed me to you because I sure af didn’t!!!!!

[nightmareonpeachstreet]

I swear to god I’m like subscribing to youtube channels in my sleep or something cause sometimes I look at a channel in my subs tab and I am so thoroughly like “who ARE you???”

[oneuldoh]

06월 06일 2023년

Life Log — Entry # 03

I almost made a new account here on Tumblr. I deleted it after 5 minutes of signing up. I (again) wanted to make a separate account for personal stuff. I tried doing it four months ago and when I did, I stopped posting all together; thinking no one’s going to read it anyway. But that was the point though? I ended up deleting it and moving back to this account.

I just couldn’t delete this account mainly because I have followers here even though I haven’t interacted with most of them. Anyways! I decided to make a side blog instead so I could still access my main account. I made this private too so I could post at ease without having to worry about getting judged. Guess I’ll never be comfortable spilling my thoughts out in the open.

This week, dad and I are alone at home. Mom went to Japan and will be staying there for a week. Jan is at Boracay with Pau, babysitting. I’m doing my best to do house chores while getting my stuff organized.

These days I am trying to be productive by:

Cleaning up my socials. I set up my Letterboxd account! I also made a new YouTube channel because I felt like separating my fangirling account will make my life seem like it’s organized. I also cleaned up my Twitter accounts.

Applying to jobs. I’ve been applying to jobs since last year but I didn’t took it way too seriously. Now that I’m desperate for money, I’m taking it seriously by answering calls and attending those damned interviews. I really suck at interviews. I stutter a lot and I couldn’t make a cohesive sentence. Maybe it’s one of the reasons why I couldn’t get a job offer. Oh, I have a scheduled interview this Thursday at Makati near my old office. It’s an 8am-5pm job and I’m not sure if I’m ready to commute. I hope there’s a job opportunity where I could work from home.

Listening to kpop boy group discographies! These days I’m into EXO, BTOB, and Seventeen! I’m kinda giddy that I’m discovering these groups like I’m in my teens again. I can’t believe I only liked one boy group since 2007 and that’s Bigbang. There’s news that TOP is no longer with YG and Bigbang. GD’s contract ended, too. Well, Still Life felt like it was a really good bye but I was hoping it was a See You Again type of song. Anyway! I’m listening to all of these boy groups’ albums from their first album release up to present. I want to sincerely enjoy their music. I have been following EXO since 2020 but I haven’t had the chance to discover their old songs so I couldn’t say that I’m a solid fan yet. As for BTOB, I’ve known them because of Sung-Jae BUT it’s just this year that I wanted to dive into their fandom because of Chang-Sub. I would say he’s my bias. I discovered him thru his Youtube segment Jeongwaja in ootb studio’s YouTube channel (I’ve watched all of his videos! This week, he’ll go back to the military as a promise for reaching 500k subscribers haha!) As for Seventeen, I’ve been seeing this member on Twitter and he’s just handsome af haha! His name’s Wonwoo! Although I hate getting into boy groups with more than 10 members (my memory is frail plus I can’t remember who’s singing), this group may be an exception. Their albums and songs are all a bop (although most of it were kinda sound the same). I really liked it!

Here’s a song I recently discovered that I like:

Chanyeol launched his personal YouTube channel! He talked about the meaning behind his channel name and how he got it (thanks to Zzar!). Zzar stole the show here. She knows she’s the boss haha! Hoping to get to know more of Chanyeol through his YouTube! He’s my bias (just look at that face!!!!) and seeing him with Zzar made me fall in love with him more.

I know this is a distraction from SM Ent because of the ongoing lawsuit. I hope all members of EXO leave that shitty company and just make their own company. I’ll support them no matter what happens!

Photo credit of Chanyeol’s drawing

Anyway! I typed a lot which is new. Maybe because no one’s going to read about this? And I didn’t care about whether my sentences made sense or not. I just wanted to post something.

It’s currently 11:30pm and I wake up at 6am to drink meds. Oh, I finally finished all those big pills for treating TB today. I was taking 1200mg of meds in the past two months. I can finally say good bye to those big pills. Tomorrow onwards, I’ll be taking the small pills. Hopefully, my month 2 sputum result is negative. Lately I’ve been coughing again.

Anyways. Bye for now!

[purrincess-chat]

Cat’s Not-All-Encompassing Character Ranking

Okay, so I have to admit that I omitted a lot of characters I don't have strong opinions on. Most of them were one-off akumas, so don't get your panties in a twist, your faves are probably still on here (and ranked lower than you think).

As a preface again, these are just my personal opinions. They can't hurt you. You can still like characters more or less than me. And I don't care how you feel about them. This list is for me. And the person that asked for it. So shut up. Go make your own rank list if you’re so butthurt. 

We're going in reverse order this time, starting from the bottom:

84. Gabriel Agreste- I mean, is anyone surprised? I am not private about how I think Gabriel should go to jail. Or fall off a cliff. Or be erased from existence. Rip to those that like him, but I’m different.

83. Thomas Astruc- Honestly, he’s down here on principle. Self-inserts are generally a no-no, and I just laugh every time I see him on screen because he really put himself in this show and said boohoo no one appreciates me XD

82. Bob Roth- I feel like this one should also be obvious. He’s just a dick. Terrible human. I give him 0 stars.

81. Tomoe Tsurugi- We all collectively hate her, right? It’s not just me?

80. Su Han- This mans has small peepee energy. And he bad mouthed Fu, so get FUCKED, my dude.

79. Rolland Dupain- Listen, I get it, he liked Marinette in the end, but I could do without the racism.

78. Nathalie Sancoeur- My opinion of Nathalie took a nosedive after the s2 finale. I just do not care that she is in love with her boss. Don’t care that she’s dying. Just do not have it in me.

77. XY- Justin Bieber ass wannabe.

76. Nora Cesiare- I didn’t care for Nora. I know Thomas loves her, but the overbearing sibling trope is tired.

75. Anarka Couffaine- I underestimated how much I don’t really like her. Like, it’s not full-on hate, but I just do not care for her.

74. Otis Cesaire- Got akumatized because a kid said he could outrun a panther. I’m still not over it, Otis.

73. Andre Bourgeois- No love for the crooked mayor. I hope your wife divorces you. 

72. Alec Cataldi- The real villain of Stormy Weather. Like fr why is he such an asshole?

71. Roger Raincomprix- Is Officer Roger just doing his best? Sometimes. But like sometimes this mans just needs to take a chill pill.

70. M. D'Argencourt- Please get out of the 1600s

69. Ella/Etta- These two are basically the same character, and I am indifferent to both of them.

68. KnightOwl/Barbara- Listen, I would have liked you more if you were less controlling.

67. Majestia- Same as above, but like I guess I like you more

66. Theo- *Mean Girls principal voice* Stay away from underaged girls!

65. Andre the ice cream man- I just want a scoop of chocolate, Andre. Is that too much to ask??

64. Amelie Graham de Vanily- We haven’t seen much of her, but she seems like a snake bitch.

63. M. Kubdel- I mean, if my son wanted to resurrect an ancient mummy and believed in aliens, I’d give the family heirloom to my daughter too.

62. Jalil Kubdel- Lolol, buddy, pal, dude, my guy. Chill.

61. Vincent (Adrien's photographer)- Head empty. Mom’s spaghetti. Idk he’s alright.

60. Manon- I don’t hate Manon. She just gets on my nerves every time she talks.

59. M. Ramier- This mans got akumatized a billion times because he gets emotional about pigeons. I mean, honestly mood.

58. Mme. Mendeleiev- She doesn’t put up with Chloe’s shit, and we respect her for this.

57. Baby August- Someone just give this mans some food. He’s a growing boy.

56. Santa Claus- If I were Santa, I too would list Ladybug as the best kid in the world.

55. Art Teacher- He doesn’t even have a name, but I vibe with him. He seems like he likes to paint scenes of nature with his pet squirrels.

54. Prince Ali- Lil mans just wanted to have a good time. I can respect that.

53. Duusu- Duusu, I get that your Miraculous was broken, but get with the program, girl. You is a hostage.

52. Other Kwamis- Idk, all the ones we haven’t seen as much. I don’t have real opinions on them yet. Just neutral.

51. Sass- He gives me dad vibes.

50. M. Damocles- You go, you funky owl man

49. Jean (Chloe's Butler)- He deserves a raise. What is your name, sir? We may never know.

48. Mireille Caquet- She’s pretty cute. No complaints.

47. Aurore Beaureal- Baby’s first akuma. I love her design. She’s a cutie.

46. Claudie Kante (Max’s mom)- This womans just wanted to go to space and live her dream. We stan a hardworking queen.

45. Hot Dog Dan- I like him more than Andre the ice cream fraud. Sure, my hotdog might turn me purple, but if I ask for chili on it, I bet he’d oblige.

44. Nadja Chamack- I mean, she’s doing her best.

43. Audrey Bourgeois- So, as I said in the episode ranking, I have a love-hate relationship with Audrey. She’s the worst, but that’s why I love her. I love her ironically. Like, yeah she’s atrocious, but I just want to watch her burn the world.

42. Luka Couffaine- Directly in the middle, like he’s always been.

41. Nathaniel Kurtzberg- My opinion of Nath improved after Reverser surprisingly. I ship it.

40. Chris Lahiffe- I like Chris better than Ella/Etta. He’s just a little mans out here living life wanting to grow up. Don’t believe it, Chris. Stay little forever. Being an adult suuuuucks.

39. Fang the Crocodile- The goodest boy.

38. Nooroo- I just want to give him a hug.

37. Mlle. Bustier- She’s doing her best, but I mean, when ya whole class keeps getting turned into supervillains, I’m surprised she’s not an alcoholic.

36. Penny Rolling- I just like her. I think she’s neat.

35. Ondine- Mermaid queen! She’s so sweet, and I love her with Kim. I hope we see more of her in the future.

34. Marc Anciel- Marc is a little cutie bean. Idc if he’s based off one of Thomas’s irl friends. He can stay.

33. Wayzz- He loves Master Fu so much I cry.

32. Felix Graham de Vanily- I know everyone hates canon Felix, but tbh he exudes massive chaotic neutral gremlin energy, and I actually kinda vibe with that. And he pisses with his uncle which is a whole ass mood.

31. Tikki- Tikki is very cute, but bby please work on the preaching. You don’t always know what’s right, babe.

30. Sabrina Raincomprix- Sabrina deserves better. I hope we see good things happen for her.

29. Lila Rossi- Surprised? I actually like Lila. The first fic I ever wrote for this fandom was a Lila redemption. I think she is a good antagonist and foil to Marinette. I absolutely want to see her get dunked on in canon, but that doesn’t mean I hate her.

28. Wayhem- I don’t know why, but Wayhem makes me laugh. I love him XD

27. Uncle Cheng- He’s just a good mans with a birb who wants to make you tasty food. What’s not to like?

26. Trixx- Trixx shot up after GoS. Chaotic bean make Eiffel Tower go bendy

25. Jess- She’s pretty cool. She’s a vibe.

24. Aeon- The cutest bean!!! She saw Adrien and Marinette and said yep. Those two are meant to be together. Jess, we gotta make it happen.

23. Ivan Bruel- Ivan is such a gentle bean. We love him.

22. Mylene Haprele- Smol

21. Fei Wu- I still have not watched the Shanghai special with subs, but I liked her.

20. Gina Dupain- The grandma I aspire to be.

19. Marianne Lenoir- I love her. She is good. She and Fu are so cute. And she seems like she would have kicked le ass back in the day. (and even now)

18. Rose Lavillant- I am so excited for Pigella!! Rose is too cute. We love her. 

17. Gorilla- aka Adrien’s real dad. If the series doesn’t end with Gabriel getting yeeted into the stratosphere and Gorilla adopting Adrien, I don’t want it.

16. Clara Nightingale- She’s in love with Marinette. You can’t change my mind. 16 is also how old I hc her to be, so don’t nobody come for me.

15. Tom Dupain- Most. Supportive. Dad. Soft bean. Just wants to make you fresh bread.

14. Sabine Cheng- Good mom vibes. We love to see her.

13. Juleka Couffaine- Shy goth bean. Just wants to have her picture taken. Definitely a lesbian. We stan.

12. Nino Lahiffe- The goodest boy. He’s just out here doing his best, loving his friends.

11. Chloe Bourgeois- Chloe is another one I have a love-hate relationship with. Her brattiness is funny to me. We had high hopes for her. Honestly, she ranks this high because I like to play with her in fic.

10. Max Kante- He smol and smort. And I adore his friendship with Kim and the fact that he made an AI himself at 14. What a legend.

9. Alya Cesaire- Rip to Alya salters, but I’m different. Outside of Chameleon, Alya is fine. She’s a supportive bff. All yall people that are mad she doesn’t kiss Marinette’s ass all the time need to go out and make real friends. I said what I said.

8. Alix Kubdel- I love Alix. I love how she is always so done with all the lovey-dovey bullshit. She is tiny queen, and Bunnix, while OP af, is still super cool. We love to see her.

7. Kagami Tsurugi- I will fight anyone who shits on Kagami. She has done nothing wrong, you guys are just haters. All she did was exist, and yall said, wow what a toxic bitch?? Disgraceful.

6. Jagged Stone- We are going to ignore the deadbeat dad trope that canon thrust upon him. He is a Marinette stan, and we love that.

5. Kim Le Chien- I really love Kim, you guys. Does that surprise you? Listen, my favorite male character types are sweet beans and himbos. Kim is both of these.

4. Master Fu- If you didn’t pick up on how much I love Fu from the episodes ranking, then idk what to tell you. I want him to be my grandpa. I would trust this mans with my life. He did his best. You paint those pictures, you funky little man. I love you.

3. Plagg- My galaxy trash man. Love him. 10/10 chefs kisses all around.

2. Adrien Agreste- The biggest Marinette stan there is. I just want him to kiss her on the face. And marry her. Idk, I just think that would be neat if he could do that. I just want good things for them.

1. Marinette Dupain-Cheng- Honestly, are you surprised? I have always been and always will be a Marinette stan. If you expected anyone else to be in this spot, then clown suit rentals are off to the left.

[himbo-buckley]

The Big Buddie for Dummies Guide

Hello party people and welcome to whatever this was supposed to be!

Quite a while ago I got an ask by someone about doing a guide on all the canon indicators for Buddie to explain the ship to non-shippers and about 5 anxiety attacks and four weeks later, I finally did it!

So read, enjoy, reblog, validate, disagree!

Also here are some notes before we get started:

Buddie has been around a while now and there are some incredibly people writing about them and doing meta posts for them, some of which I asked for their opinion which I will link at the end and some of which I am quoting in a way / have been inspired by (Also feel free to send me all and every post related and I will link it in the text as I will try to do the same)

This Guide is organised by the following themes we find in the show with Buddie: trust - coparenting - connection and love life - subtext

I’m not gonna lie, this is incomplete af because tbh? There is so much stuff that can be interpreted as evidence for Buddie but this is too long already so I left some stuff out, I hope ya’ll don’t mind … (also the reblog  option exists for reason, just add on what I missed, I’m not gonna bite!)

I’m gonna assume the person who reads this has a general understanding of the show and its scenes because I cannot explain every scene down to it’s very detail (I mean I can but that’s another 20000 words worth of meta and not sure anyone wants to read that … again) but I will try and link fitting gifsets (again, send them my way if you feel I should include sth.)

I should also add a warning for the fact that I, personally, think I am hilarious but others might not but fellas, Idc! (Also I cuss, some people don’t like that?)

So let’s get this show on the road then, shall we? I call this meta : „We might end up real close.“

(alternate title: „Buddie stans ship hard but canon ships harder“ or „This is Timbo’s story (of becoming more famous than Joss Whedon) and I’m just it’s vessel“)

Trust

We’re gonna start this off strong (I mean all of them are strong themes) by talking about the biggest theme with Buddie which is trust. It goes all the way back to 2.01 and the gym scene and Buck basically telling Eddie he doesn’t trust him (complaining about Eddie’s comfort level, anyone?) and that he needs to earn that - which rude but also I get it.

In fact there are two main themes which I combined into Trust which begin in 2.01:

„You’re my problem“ and „You can have my back any day“ both of which sort of sum up Buddie, because from the get go Buck decides hey, this guy is my problem and then he proceeds to make everything about Eddie his business. Eddie meanwhile tells Buck he’d love to have him watching his back - meaning Eddie trusts him and wants Buck to be his partner.

(Side note: isn’t it beautiful how that is a complete reverse of their usual attitudes? Usually Buck trusts way to easy and Eddie never does but with each other it’s the opposite!)

Let’s look at the episodes in order, okay?

2.01: „I think I’ve seen this happen in porn before“

- „You’re my problem“: I’m gonna talk about the gym scene later a bit more but this sort of establishes the dynamic Buddie has? Because both are fascinated by and focused on each other from the get go. I mean: Eddie got to the 118 and everyone seemed to be nice to him except this one guy and instead of giving him a few days, thinking he’ll come around , Eddie is like: nah, I’ll confront him! Why? Maybe it’s gay, maybe it’s Maybelline, maybe Eddie „I am not enough“ Diaz was just sick and tired of everyone putting trust in him because soldier and craved the vibe check?

- „You can have my back“: Basically what happened was, they got the bomb out (being partners and in sync even when they didn’t like each other yet) and they stood outside and Eddie tries a new approach cause for some reason Eddie decided out of everyone at the 118 he needed Buck to like him specifically and so he pays the guy - who was nothing but rude to him so far but who is also very competent - a compliment and Buck gets all flustered and thankful - and „You’re my problem!“ gets rephrased into „Or you know, you could have mine!“

(Also the look of pure elation on Buck’s face when Eddie compliments him, you know the person Hen has basically said is so awesome and pretty it transcends sexualities? And he picks Buck of all people to have his back? Buck has no choice but to stan!)

- In terms of Trust we also get the pool scene which is our second instance of them being in sync and partners by both jumping into the pool and getting the guy out basically at the same time

2.02 / 2.03: „Why Edmundo Diaz hates earthquakes part 1 and part 2 (of 2)“

- „Where do you want us, Cap?“: Now looking at the timeline of 2.01 they’ve known each other for approximately four days as this is their fourth shift together (we see) and yet Eddie is already comfortable enough to answer for himself and Buck several times. He’s the one who decides they will go in and he answers the roll call later for the both of them. This is our first real instance of them being in sync and just their whole interaction, from Eddie going along with Buck’s plan about the elevator to everything else just shows how much they already trust each other.

- „I, uh, I love kids“: Also Buck in this episode, why was it so important that Eddie knows you like kids? Please share!

- “Eddie, you’re kid is in the safest place he can be.“: Connected to this is a sub-theme I like to call: ‚They know each other better than anyone else does‘ which is established here with Buck realising that Eddie is full of shit when he pretends not to worry about Chris so Buck spends some time trying to assure Eddie Chris is safe at school.

- „Is everything okay?“: Of course, the fact that Buck was the only one to check in with Eddie’s mental state from the truck scene onwards is very telling, because everyone else likes and trusts him but they don’t really care (yet)

- And the episodes end with everyone reuniting with their families, including Eddie - while Buck watches from the car because Buck drove him there because he has his back (also see Subtext)

2.04: „Hearteyes, motherforker“

This whole episode is what made several people ship Buddie and well, I can see it and I will talk about a lot of it with the other themes but for now:

- „I just feel bad for him. (…) Eddie’s working on it“: This episode really leans into the whole „You’re my problem“ with Buck apparently driving Eddie to the hospital (or at least coming along) to Buck clearing Chris coming to the station with Bobby to worrying about them at home until finally he introduces him to Carla.

Mind you, they haven’t known each other that long, yet Buck feels the need to meddle in Eddie’s life and fix his problems for him which, yes, is very Buck thing to do but still: Considering Eddie was introduced to us as this super capable guy, it’s interesting that Buck immediately saw through him and decided: yeah, that guy needs me to take care of him.

Or you know, to have his back.

2.07: „*Tommy Wiseau voice* Oh, hi Shannon!“

- „I needed someone to have my back“: This episode establishes the significance of „You can have my back“ even more because in this episode Shannon comes back and you know what they fight about? Eddie not having her back. Shannon quite literally says „I needed someone to have my back“ which is almost the same exact  Eddie tells Buck in 2.01 and with that wording as well ...

In the same scene Shannon also says how Eddie always knows best and is the one to make the decisions which  is another parallel you can draw to Buddie where Eddie began like that in 2.01 (the scene at the mechanic’s) and then began to follow Buck’s lead (the elevator shaft) / let Buck help him (Carla))

2.10: „It’s all about ‚figured it was none of my business‘“

I love this episode very much because there are several Buddie hints in there.

- “I think it’s none of our business.“: Connected to the topic of Trust is the scene between Chimney and Buck when they buy the Christmas tree and Buck keeps talking about Shannon coming to the station and the fact that Shannon and Eddie hooked up while Chim seems exasperated by this and frankly doesn’t care and he tells Buck as much, saying it’s none of their business. Except it is because Eddie is Buck’s problem, remember?

- „So … not gonna say anything?“: And then the „None of your / my business“ gets repeated in the scene when Buddie sits at the fountain talking about Chris and Shannon and they both say it’s none of Buck’s business. Yet Eddie then still tells Buck all about it sounding all defensive.

- It’s also the first instance of Eddie willingly searching out Buck’s advice about Christopher.

- And related to the topic of knowing each other well, considering how surprised Buck is by all of this, one sort of has to wonder how often they hang out outside of work. Because the way Buck acts makes one assume it’s quite a lot, which is why Buck is so hurt he doesn’t know about it.

- Also the fact that they so casually go somewhere with Christopher and the way Buck talks about him making it clear they have done this before.

- „Trying to protect your kid.“: On the topic of Trust I also wanna mention the fact that Eddie doesn’t trust Shannon with Christopher. Which is a direct parallel to 3.03 when Eddie tells Buck there is no one he trusts more with his son. And also 3.09 when Buck gets to be back in Chris’s life after the lawsuit as soon as Buddie made up yet Shannon needs to really beg for it? I mean, yeah.

2.13: „ Evan *I colour coordinate with bae while my sister is abducted and my brother is dying* Buckley“

- „Oh, no, I know what you were thinking.“: The scene at the hospital between Buck and Eddie does have a bit of subtextual relevance but I do think we should note the fact that this scene was in the show at all like this because wouldn’t Bobby have made a bit more sense? After all they spent one and a half Season before that making him the guy Buck goes to for advice and he has sisters as well, yet here we get Eddie being the one to talk to Buck.

We get Eddie basically telling Buck exactly what he needed to hear and while not exactly condoning his actions, he is also not judging them. Instead Eddie is telling Buck he might have done the same, because Eddie and Buck know each other and see each other.

So I wouldn’t necessarily call that scene Buddie-hinting but it does definitely play into the whole ‚having each other’s backs‘ and ‚knowing each other well‘ thing they got going on.

Also compare it to 3.06 in the way that both times Buck did something wrong and it was Eddie who actually took the time to listen to Buck’s reasoning and be the one to understand him, which is a very important part of their dynamic.

And the line „I wasn’t worried about that.“ in response to how Buck thought he would get away with all of this might be one of the top 10 heartbreaking lines of this show for me and that is saying a lot with 911!

2.14: „‚It’s a miracle… bro #nohomo’“

I am not fully sure if the scene of Buck freaking out about Eddie going back in to save the kid really fits in here, but I’m also very unsure were else to put it, so Trust it is!

- „Eddie, what are you doing?”: It does fit into the whole having each other’s back thing with Buck immediately jumping into action to try and help Eddie

- But in all honesty prior to 3.14 this would have not made the cut as I would have been like: eh, that’s just who Buck is as a person - but as 3.14 will proof / has proven, he can be calm and collected even when his sister, his ACTUAL family is in danger and while I would argue it was in part because there was less he could do to actively help in 3.14, it still deserves to be mentioned now

- Side note: considering 2.13 / 2.14 and 3.14 / 3.15 this marks two occasions were Buck being worried for Maddie’s life was followed by an episode of Buck being worried for Eddie’s life and that too deserves mentioning

2.18: „insert *Jane Austen film*-gif: It’s about the hands!“

- I’m not really sure if this is really connected to Trust but Eddie holds Buck’s hand the whole time, even after he has dragged him out from under the firetruck until they disappear in the ambulance.

- Also the fact that Eddie, who is probably stronger than Chimney, is the one helping Hen drag Buck out from under the fire truck while Chimney helps lift it is … worth a mention.

- Definitely connected to Trust is Buck’s insistence to going to Eddie’s ceremony because this is Eddie and he has his back

3.01: „How you know he no sleep naked?“

Yes, this scene has a lot to unpack. In terms of *trust* / how well they know each other:

- „He’s just sulking, Cap“: Eddie says about Buck. In my opinion the phrasing combined with how before that they were talking about how Maddie can’t get Buck to leave the house and he won’t answer any of Bobby’s calls implies that either a) Eddie too has tried to contact Buck with no success or b) is actually in contact with Buck, has talked to him and has concluded based on what he saw that Buck is sulking - and yes, I am leaning toward b).

- “Maybe you’ll learn something.“: Which brings me to the fact that it’s Eddie who makes the  plan to get Buck out of his funk and prove to him that he still has stuff to live for, despite how dismissive he had been about Buck’s feelings before, calling it sulking and saying Buck should just brush it off. Because Eddie has Buck’s back despite it all and is there for him and trusts him.

- „He’s hanging out with his Buck today“: In terms of actual Trust there is the fact that Buck is very much depressed in this episode - and what does Eddie do? Puts his son in his care, you know, the most important person in Eddie’s life, convinced that Buck will be able to take care of him despite how low and bad he is feeling about himself. One) because it has been the case for Eddie probably. Two) because this is who Buck is as a person even while depressed and Eddie trusts that. And three) because even before the Tsunami Eddie was very sure about how much Buck loved Chris.

- „Honestly I don’t know how to help him.“: This also parallels Maddie with Eddie in an interesting way because Maddie spends the whole episode worried about Buck and thinking he cannot take care of himself, while Eddie trusts in Buck to not only take care of himself but also his son. Which yeah, interesting.

3.02 „Eddie hates earthquakes - the remix“

- The episode sort of proves that while the others may have known what Eddie was gonna do, Operation „Buck up Buck“ was his plan because he is the one who has Buck’s back. (Considering for example Maddie doesn’t know about it as she thinks Buck is home and had Chim been involved he would have told her beforehand meaning this was Eddie’s plan and he executed it and then told the others about it while at work.)

- Also in terms of literal Trust: LA is hit by a Tsunami and Eddie doesn’t worry about his son once because Buck said they are going to the movies next and also because Eddie trusts Buck to protect Chris like he would.

3.03 „‚Do it for the trauma!‘ - Buck-edition“

Once again a subtext-mill but there is some textual evidence as well:

- “How do you tell your best friend that you lost his son?“: At the VA hospital Buck calls Eddie his best friend when he talks to Maddie which I always found weird in this context? Because it should always be hard to tell another person about how you got their child killed (which is not my opinion but the way Buck sees it here, okay?), yet the writers choose to put in a reference to how much Eddie means to Buck.

- Which connects to another subtext and text thing which is the voiceover which has Buck say the lines: „To be seen. To be found. Isn’t that what we’re all looking for?“ after talking to Eddie, which no longer just implies this is about Eddie but actually straight up says it - and it connects to the sub-topic of how well they know each other, cause Buck says in this episode: Eddie is my best friend and he sees me for who I really am. Which, yeah, is stuff one usually finds in connection to a love interest. (Will talk about it more with Subtext though)

- Also before that the voiceover has Buck say „Sometimes being lost is not knowing how to get from where we are to where we wanna be, where we need to be.“ right as Eddie knocks on the door, which basically states that Eddie and Chris might be where Buck wants to be but also how Eddie apparently knows how to get Buck there. Because he knows him so well. (He literally calls Eddie his life raft in the voiceover!)

- „Buck, there is nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you”: Now the Trust theme in regards to the loft scene is interesting in how it compares Buck to two people in Eddie’s eyes / life: Shannon and himself. Shannon, as I already said, we have with 2.07 and 2.10, both of which talked about how she left Chris (and Eddie) and how Eddie no longer trusts her because of this and refuses to let her back into Chris’s life. Which is different to how he always lets Buck back into Chris’s life, even after the lawsuit with virtually no hesitation once they made up as far as we can see. Meaning he trusts Buck more than he trusts Shannon. Who is, you know, his wife?

As for Eddie himself, I’m gonna flashforward a bit to 3.08 and the conversation between Eddie and Bobby. Because in 3.03 Eddie talks about messing up with Chris, yet how he never stops trying and how he knows Buck is the same way - which is interesting considering 3.08 has Eddie basically say that he has not forgiven himself for all those mistakes. Yet he forgives Buck both for the Tsunami and abandoning them during the lawsuit.

And now I wanna say something very controversial and hurtful but also connected to how I read Buddie and Trust which is that in my opinion? Eddie includes himself here. Eddie tells Buck here he trusts him more or at the very least just as much as he trusts himself with his son. Which is pretty big, considering he barely trusted his wife, the mother of said son, who he has known for at the very least about 11 years during Season 2? Someone he himself said he loves? Someone he at one point planned his future with? (Meaning he most definitely plans his future with Buck in it now…)

3.04 „discount!Buck in the house“

- Two things are in this episode, both of which are very much not about Trust in the literal sense but how much time Buddie spends together outside of work:

“Can’t fight city hall.“ Eddie being the only one on board with the fire drill Buck’s leading because he is a boy scout who follows all the rules but also because Buck probably talked to him about his job as fire marshal beforehand and so Eddie knows how important what is happening here is to Buck.

„You don’t know math.“: now, you can think this is another dig at Buck’s intelligence but you also have to acknowledge that at one point Eddie might have either heard someone reference Buck’s math knowledge in front of Eddie or Eddie has seen Buck try doing math and has remembered that well enough to immediately be able to pull out that dig. (Which brings us to a parallel I will talk about later!)

- “Uh, who - who’s that?“: I also firmly believe that Buck would have not been as willing to go along with the lawsuit, despite Bobby’s betrayal, had Eddie not immediately rushed off toward Lena at the firehouse, making Buck think Eddie (his partner) has replaced him. Does no longer need him to have his back.

3.05: „What if we fight like a married couple in a grocery store downtown LA, bro?“

Ah, yes, that episode! Filled with Buddie signs!

- “And if Cap says he’s not ready, he’s not ready.“: What I find interesting in terms of Buddie and Trust is the fact that Eddie apparently trusts Bobby’s judgement more than he trusts Buck’s. Which I find OOC. Or not because Eddie is a soldier and Eddie grew up fairly authoritarian it seems his first instinct will be to follow the chain of command / do as the person in charge tells him to.

- Now everything else that happens after including and specifically the street fighting storyline? That was a direct result of the lawsuit and the deposition in which Buck betrayed Eddie’s trust by revealing the info about Shannon. Which Buck is aware of because up until this point we see him still looking up, yet after this he drops his eyes and doesn’t really look at anyone again during the deposition.

- “And I’m not allowed to talk to Buck.“: Yet. YET despite this massive betrayal in Eddie’s eyes what stops him from calling Buck later is the fact that he wasn’t allowed to do so! Nothing else. Also the phrasing is very interesting as it gives us three entities Eddie considered to call: his abuela, Buck and the 118, meaning Hen, Chim and Bobby - the people he will call his family about 6 episodes later - are an uniformed mass but Buck is his own person - because up to this point Buck always had Eddie’s back. And we all know he still would have had! (Sidenote: this line is what made me an actual shipper and why ya’ll can read posts like this, so maybe say thank you to Lyndsey Beaulieu? Or fuck you, depending on your opinion of me ;P)

- „And now I can’t even talk to you.“: This whole scene gives huge character exposition and I’ve talked a shit ton about the fight in the grocery store before as have a lot of other people, but basically what it boils down to is that Eddie is mad at Buck because he revealed things about them to his lawyer but mostly because Eddie thought they had each others back and trusted each other and apparently Buck doesn’t trust and care about him the same way Eddie does for him because he didn’t even consult Eddie about the lawsuit? And Eddie misses Buck a lot. And Chris misses Buck a lot. And Eddie is already mad because Shannon wanted a divorce despite how hard he tried and then she died, meaning she left him again and now Buck left him as well and why is Eddie never enough for anyone?

And of course, as always, Eddie is mad at himself the most because he wasn’t enough for Shannon and he wasn’t enough for Buck and he’s probably not enough for Chris who is struggling so much and Eddie just feels angry and lost all the time!

I think this is the moment Buck finally understands how much he means to Eddie truly. How Eddie meant every word in 3.03. How for once someone actually trusted him, depended on him - and he let them down. Which was never his intention because Buck never understood that he could (which is not the topic of this post though).

- “Why can’t you see my side of things?“: On Buck’s side, while he isn’t nearly as mad as Eddie, he does raise the question of why Eddie didn’t have his back - which is a very fair question but Eddie is still too mad at Buck here to hear it.

- What is also very interesting about this scene is that no one, not even Bobby who was actually sued by Buck, is as mad at him as Eddie is and no one dares steps between them. Probably because everyone recognises they are closest with each other, so the conversation hits a bit different and also is about a lot more than the „stupid lawsuit“. Yeah.

(Real talk I have been very mad at friends before and I am known to make scenes but damn, this scene does not read platonic at all, it reads ‘married couple fights in grocery store in LA - what happens next will surprise you. News at 11.’)

- In other news, Eddie didn’t come to the rage room in the end and Buck was very very sad about it.

3.06: „*cries about the framing*“

(Sidenote: I feel Eddie so much in this episode, I too would be too embarrassed to talk to Buck had I just screamed at him in a grocery store in full view of all our coworkers. I too would avoid everyone like the plague and maybe join a fight club just so I would not have to deal with those feelings. I get it, my dude!)

- “Whew, dude, are you okay?“: We’ll talk about it with 3.08 as well, but it is very significant and pointed that Buck immediately knows something is wrong with Eddie when no one else at the station had seemed to be aware of that.

- “I don’t know what you want from me, Buck“: The apology scene is very subtext heavy but what it comes down to in the whole having each other’s back / knowing each other well / Trust - column is the fact that after being mad and avoiding him all day Eddie still sticks around and more importantly actually listens to Buck - which, as shitty as that sounds, but considering how he acted before if Eddie hadn’t wanted to still be Buck's friend he could have said something shitty and left or stayed and not actually listened to what Buck had to say - but he didn’t because as hurt as Eddie had been by Buck’s betrayal he still trust him and he wants to understand, which I do think sets Eddie apart from everyone else because Hen and Chim forgive Buck but they don’t ever try to figure out where he is coming from while Bobby is … being Bobby about all of. Eddie meanwhile, who has the most or maybe the only right to actually be mad about the lawsuit, still trusts Buck enough to know that he had his reasons and actually takes the time to listen to them. Even if he is being sassy.

- And on Buck’s side we do have his need to reconnect with Eddie the whole episode and we have him notice stuff about Eddie no one else did and we also have the really beautiful and mature line of Buck saying: „I just want you to talk to me. Even if it’s just to say you’re still mad.“ Which I love very much and tells us a lot about Buck and communication, because Buck values openness so much.

- “And I just wanted to…“ - „Punch someone?“: Also while it was important for Buck to explain himself to someone - it was especially important for him to explain himself to Eddie, both because he considers Eddie his best friend and also because the grocery store scene showed him how much he means to Eddie which probably floored Buck because as we learned before and also after: Buck is not used to people needing him as much as he needs them.

3.08: „XOXO gossip (fire)fighters“

- “Whoo. Nice truck.“: One thing about 911 is that it’s a very plot and action driven show, meaning sometimes it will lack the time to actually show us certain things, especially when it comes to relationships, so it relies a lot on telling us things about characters and their relationships and as these scenes here show us they do a good job at it. Buddie talking about Eddie buying a new truck is very casual and banter-y / flirty (this is a Buddie post so I call it like I see it) and light and shows us: hey, they are friends again and close again and they know each other very well - while also showing us: Eddie still keeps stuff from Buck but Buck knows something is off.

- “Eddie too.“: Which brings me to my next point and the thing I love most about this episode aside from Heidi which is Buck running around and going: ‚something is wrong with Eddie‘ while everyone else is like: ‚Eddie? Are you sure? I haven’t noticed anything‘

Which leaves two ways to read this:

Eddie and the rest of the 118 aren’t as close as it seems and they do not care about Eddie that much - which considering all the deep talk between Eddie and Chimney in 3b especially and the fact that he calls them his family would be fucked up and also doesn’t seem like the vibe they are going for OR

BUDDIE! I mean, look at what has been going on with the street fighting storyline, essentially the writers went: okay, so Eddie can't talk to Buck so he goes completely off the rails but no one will know because Eddie hides it so well - EXCEPT Buck will realise sth is wrong the second he looks at Eddie and once the lawsuit is done he will spend two episodes running after Eddie and trying to figure out what is going on

3.09: „#tw: mild adult themes & implied sexual content / #pwp - porn without porn“

- “He’s kind of obsessed with natural disasters.“: Honest question: Is Buck really obsessed with natural disasters or does Eddie have earthquake related trauma and Buck has been googling stuff and telling him facts to calm Eddie down every time the earth vibrates a little because a train or something passes them by?

In any case it’s a very cute scene with Eddie once more revealing how well he knows Buck and the writers confirming to us that yes, these boys spent a lot of time with each other and talking to each other - without needing to show the scenes

- “I could still take you“: AFTER ALL they needed the runtime to do this other little scene this fandom has not talked about at all ever mainly because it is so very straight basically people stopped shipping after.

I’m just kidding, obviously the whole scene was very queer both in subtext but especially in text, I mean, what even was that line about still taking him, Buck? There is a child not even 15 feet away, where is your sense for decency and decorum? DO YOU WANT TO TRAUMATISE HIM EVEN MORE???

A few notes on this scene:

- It’s been pointed out to me that Maddie complains about how everything around there gets shared with the 118 and how Buck … turns around and shares everything about his sister with Eddie, which I love because it seems so normal and comfortable between them like they do that all the time, which is way cute and domestic!

Added to that considering the conversation Eddie had the week before with Bobby about Shannon and the throwaway reference about thinking his marriage having been complicated, I wonder: Did Eddie talk to everyone about the street fighting and Shannon after his talk with Bobby in 3.08? Did he just talk to Buck about it? Did Buck know about Shannon wanting a divorce all along? (Yeah, you know were I am leaning, right?)

- “Especially if you aren’t around to see that they need saving“: As for the apology in and off itself, I’m not gonna talk about the character implications again cause been there done that, send an ask if you wanna know more, but what it comes down to is: Buck acknowledging that he should have been there for Eddie and he didn’t consider the Eddie of it all when he sued Bobby, which is interesting because OFFICIALLY Eddie really is just his best friend and coworker at this point so did he really have to consider his feelings all that much?

Also Buck is saying - and Eddie is not contradicting this - that Eddie street fighting would not have happened if Buck had been around, which, to quote a good friend of mine: Uff!

I think we can admit that while Eddie was mad at Buck, his anger was not primarily about Buck but it was amplified by Buck abandoning him. We can admit that Buck was what ultimately caused Eddie to lose his control and considering everything that Eddie went through in the past year with Shannon and considering everything Buck went through in the past two years: this is as close to unconditional love as these two can manage at the time and that is very beautiful and does support Buddie 100%. They are each other’s anchor and person the one they turn to in a crisis.

Or well, Buck is for Eddie. Buck does have more people like that in his life with his sister there and I do think before the lawsuit he wasn’t fully aware that he could depend on Eddie so fully because Buck always doubts how committed other people are to him because abandonment issues.

3.11: „Bist du single? Nein, eher Album!“

- „This is Eddie’s house. I’m not really a guest.“: Incredibly strong indicator / implications toward how much time these two boys spent with each other, considering how comfortable both of them are in each other’s space (and I don’t mean physical but material space). Eddie has a key to Buck’s apartment and just let’s himself in willy-nilly, while Buck is around in Eddie’s place often enough to not think of himself as a guest there. (And while that might be normal best friend behaviour to some of us, Maddie’s words imply that it is not for her / the Buckleys.)

3.14: „Frank says ‚Thank you, this paid for my new house!‘“ / 3.15: „MY therapist also says ‚Thank you!‘“

I’m gonna group these two together, since 3.14 in itself doesn’t have any relevance considering Eddie isn’t even in the episode but it does become relevant in regards to 3.15!

- Basically what it all comes down to is the contrast between Buck’s reaction to Maddie being in danger and his reaction to Eddie nearly dying!

Now I already said while talking about 2.14 part of it was that Buck was aware he was in no position to help Maddie and might actually make stuff worse if he intervenes while with Eddie he was HIS ACTUAL LIFELINE! He was actually responsible for getting Eddie out of the well and home to his family. BUT (!) it’s still very pointed, especially remembering they apparently changed the order of episodes around? Meaning we are really hit with the contrast and we have to consider the implications of it all!

- Also just Buck’s reaction in general, even with Chimney and Maddie in Season 2 he wasn’t this frantic, he wasn’t freaking out like that! This really seems like all those scene’s shows like that usually do to confirm one person is in love with the other by having them completely loose it at the prospect of the other dying.

And damn, does 911 delivers here, not just with Buck literally trying to dig down to Eddie with his bare hands but also with his conviction for the rest of the episode before going sort of catatonic near the end. Basically Buck was going through the 5 stages of grief over Eddie during the course of this episode and we just? Let him?

- Of course we should mention Buck has Eddie’s back always, so he doesn’t give up on him and doesn’t entertain the notion of Eddie possibly being dead for even a microsecond because this is Eddie and Buck needs him!

- And to add to the list of heartbreaking lines we have Hen saying: „Why? So we have two cut lines?“ because yes, Buck would choose to stay down there rather than let himself be saved if Eddie was already dead - and if Eddie wasn’t he would force Eddie to trade lines with him so Buck could be the one to die because Buck thinks Eddie’s life is more valuable than his and also he is a selfless idiot who loves Eddie more than himself - which frankly is a mutual thing if we look at 3.03

Option #3 btw would be that Hen knows Eddie has a legitimate reason to cut his line and he would explain that to Buck and - considering who they are - Buck would immediately agree and cut his line as well.

Anyways, no matter which option the writers were thinking off this line is heartbreaking and the implication interesting!

To sum it all up, the episode basically said: Buck would die for Eddie and he loves him more than anything else

- The Eddie implications of this episode are mostly Subtext, so we’ll get to them later in case you thought I forgot!

3.16: „The rope was a metaphor after all“

Tbh I do not think that this episode was really about how no person can be happy / live without regrets / not be lonely unless they are in a relationship with someone or they would not have put that much focus on the relationship between Maddie and Buck and the fact that his abandonment issues stem from her leaving.

- “He’s not gonna do it alone“: As for Buddie, the episode goes back to them being partners and in sync with the roof thing and yay, it has a different ending then the reversed situation the episode before but also it features a metaphor we will talk about later

- “Hey, you’re more than welcome to come and celebrate with a bunch of 9 year olds.“: Just like we will talk later about Eddie inviting Buck to the sleepover! Because while I don’t think the invite was all that serious and I don’t think even considering everyone else, Buck would have taken him up on it because celebrating with a bunch of 9 year olds around isn’t what Buck had in mind, it’s very interesting that the first person taken out of the equation is the guy Buck is closest to and probably spends the most time with.

- And now let’s talk about the playing pool scene because it once again shows that 1) Buck and Eddie are very alike, 2) they know each other very well and 3) they care about each other the most!

Because for 1) I do wanna point everyone to the fact that Eddie doesn’t have anyone outside his family and the 911 either or they would have mentioned him staying in contact with his army buddies or something.

2) Eddie is the only one who actually listens to what Buck says and gets what Buck is really asking, while Bobby, Hen and Chim are all too focused on their own experiences to get that the reason Buck tries so hard to help Red is because he thinks he is Red (I mean they do get it, but they don’t really realise how serious this is for Buck - yet)

3) There is also a lot of focus on Eddie in this scene which we will talk about later as well but it picks up the whole ambiguous „us“ from the grocery store which technically refers to the whole firefam but the way it’s said still implies that it is about the two of them especially.

To anticipate a bit: every time the word „Us“ is used in this scene Buddie only looks at each other. When Buck says „I mean that would never happen … to us.“ he looks at everyone else but turns to look at Eddie as he very pointedly says „to us“ and keeps his focus there for a moment. Eddie meanwhile technically turns to the pool table while he says the word „us“ but he only focuses on Buck before this and doesn’t look at anyone else because to him: Buck is the important aspect here. And no one else!

Not to mention the intense look Buck gives Eddie (and only Eddie) when he says „Better not.“. Like damn, in 3 Seasons Buck has never sounded this threatening before!

Basically the way this scene is acted combined with the words that were written it sort of reads like them going: We’re all family here but you and me will most definitely never leave each other!

I mean there is a reason why Buddie used the ambiguous „us“ while everyone else talked about the firefam being friends or being family.

(And yes, that might be a bit of a reach but this is a Buddie guide after all, so we are going with the buddie-est interpretation!)

3.17: „‚Don’t say her name‘-challenge“

- “Uh no, someone else.“: More of a subtext scene but it does seem pointed that Buck refuses to admit that he was thinking about Abby here, considering Bobby most definitely knew that Buck was talking about Abby because he was there for the hot-air balloon date, so even if he did not remember right away he knew the second Buck said he didn’t know from Maddie and since Hen and Chimney weren’t there in the truck (and also, they probably would have known who Buck was talking about as well) the only one Buck was hiding from was Eddie.

Which makes sense, even if you only look at them as best friends, because Eddie only saw the aftermath and what we canonically know that he heard about Abby were things like Buck’s speech in 2.08, so … even as just Buck’s friend he must really dislike her

(Also there is that whole parallel one can draw between Abby and Shannon which I talked about here)

- „Buck invites Eddie“: So I’ve been going back and forth on what to write here for a few hours now and what it comes down to is this: despite being 6500 words deep into a meta on Buddie and knowing full well the writers so far have no intention of actively doing Buddie, I would not accuse 911 of queerbaiting. HOWEVER, if the show ends and Buddie doesn’t happen I will consider this scene queerbaiting because there would have been ways to write this that did not leave the implications it did because the way it has been written the text is:

„If I bring my romantic life-partner to dinner with my best friend he will bring his romantic life-partner who will invite her brother who will invite his best friend and then we have to invite this other couple we are all close with.“ and well, one of them is not like the others, right?

(Well, technically two but Maddie and Buck are most definitely siblings despite that scene in 2.01)

Because essentially what that scene did here was say: If I bring my wife the evening turns into this couples night with all our friends - except Buck and Eddie aren’t a couple.

And sure, just like all great queerbaits there is a reasonable explanation as well as a completely platonic way to read this because of course Buck would not wanna be all alone with two couple so he would bring his best friend and the we’d have to invite the other couple we know as well so they don’t feel left out.

EXCEPT - and this is why it feel pointed and queerbait-ey: We have already seen the 118 hang out without Athena and Bobby at Chimney’s birthday and it was never mentioned to us whether they were invited and didn’t come - or Chimney didn’t invite them. Both explanations sort of make Hen’s point moot because it does proof that they can hang out without their boss slash friend and his wife slash her best friend without it being a big deal meaning especially if this was a make-up dinner for Chimney’s birthday they wouldn’t have needed to be there.

There is also the fact that supposably Alfred is still in town? You know, Chimney’s brother? So if they wanted to avoid the Buddie implication they could have also thrown in how Chim might bring his brother like:

„I invite you, so he invites Maddie, Maddie invites Buck, Buck invites Eddie, Chim might invite Alfred,  and now we gotta invite Athena and Bobby“ - see how that has a completely different feel? Now there are three single guys and two of which are siblings of someone else in the group while the third is friends with the rest of the group, making this sound less like couples night out and more like a group of friends hanging out.

But they didn’t do it like that so now it feels like they are pointedly equating Buddie with the canon couples of the show which is quite queerbait-ey.

3.18: „TrainCRASH? More like train WRECK? *cries*“

Okay, so this episode is a little hard to do because there is so much going on and a lot of it is very hard to categorise! As for the topic of Trust and having each other’s back:

- I do think that a lot of Eddie here come down to having Buck’s back - even when Buck might not think that’s what Eddie’s doing like in the train car, but he probably realised later which is why we see Buck talk about it with Bobby but not with Eddie because they are at this point where you no longer need to have clarifying talks (about stuff like that, once romantic!Buddie hits they’ll have to do all the talking).

And that’s basically it when it comes to Trust because most of what is happening in the episode when it comes to Buddie is Subtext!

Coparenting

I think this theme needs less of an explanation - though I do wanna point out that while I think Buck has fatherly feelings for Chris and Chris loves Buck a lot, Buck is not actually his parent / father. He is slowly getting there and if or when Buddie happens he might become Chris’s other parent but right now he is not. So this theme is about Buck being a honorary member of the Diaz family in general and Eddie’s treatment of him most of all.

Because the way I see Eddie him dating anyone would always be tied to his son. Eddie has been shown to be someone who would do anything for family and his son in particular, so the fact that Buck is tied into this family is important. It also shows how much they are already a family without actually dating and proofs they spent more time with each other than we see and more than with anyone else.

I should also say that there is a very heavy overlap between this and the category of Subtext so some things will be repeated but all of them deserve to be repeated so there is that.

2.02 / 2.03: „Why Edmundo Diaz hates earthquakes part 1 and part 2 (of 2)“

- Like I already said when I discussed Trust Buck is the only one asking who Eddie is trying to reach, he is the only one trying to reassure Eddie and he does so even though Eddie is being sarcastic and pretending he doesn’t need to be comforted - also a staple in their relationship

And I think this is also were their dynamic of Buck being Eddie’s go to person when it came to Chris came from. Buck told Eddie he liked kids and then he proceeded to actually show Eddie he means it and he cares and considering Eddie says the mother isn’t in the picture and Chris has no one else (which as we learn throughout the show is not 100% true because technically Eddie's parents are there, even if they have no idea how to properly raise Chris, but in LA Eddie doesn’t really have anyone (yet) he feels comfortable burdening with his fears about Chris), so that must mean one hell of a lot.

- “Hey. Service.“: There is also the moment at the end of 2.03 when Buck immediately tells Eddie: hey, service is back! and then he drives Eddie to pick up Chris which is a scene that has so much subtext so we’ll talk about it later! It does however give us our first‚ Diazs plus Buck‘-family moment because while we see everyone reuniting with their loved ones, we see Buck with Eddie and Chris and yeah.

2.04: „Hearteyes, motherforker“

- One of my favourite things about Buddie is how they manage to be exactly what the other person needs - or in case of this episode figure out exactly what the other person needs and giving it to them. It’s happening here and again in 3.01 and 3.03 and some other smaller moments as well (see 2.01 honestly).

It’s also interesting that Buck is the one to drive Eddie again because we saw he has a car! So why is that? Maybe because he knows the way better?

As for the coparenting happening here, aside from Buck introducing Eddie to Carla because he knows she is what Eddie needs, we also have Buck clearing Chris coming to the station with Bobby which is something Eddie apparently hadn’t considered but Buck had and instead of telling Eddie he needs to do that - he does it for him! Because that’s who Buck is but also because Buck realised in this episode how much Eddie really needs someone to have his back and just do stuff for him.

2.07: „*Tommy Wiseau voice* Hi Shannon“

- And in terms of having each other’s back this episode really shows the significance of this phrase with Shannon pointing out, like I said before, that from her point of view Eddie didn’t have her back. She needed him to be her husband and her coparent and he wasn’t.

Now we can argue whether that is true or not but it’s still an important parallel and puts Eddie turning toward Buck for advice into a new light.

Because as Shannon points out Eddie was never good at letting other people make decisions for him or with him before yet we continuously see him turning toward Buck for exactly that: sharing the load with him. And to put that even more into perspective: Buck is the youngest from their friend group, he is the one considered immature and he is the one without kids or younger siblings, yet he is the one Eddie choose for helping.

2.10: „It’s all about ‚figured it was none of my business‘“

- The interesting thing here is that Buck as Eddie’s friend really doesn’t have any right to know about what was happening between Shannon and Eddie if Eddie didn’t want him to, but Buck as Eddie’s family does (a little).

But either way this episode gives us another instance of Eddie confiding in Buck about his family problems - problems he again is the one most inexperienced with. In other words Eddie talking to Buck about it was really about Eddie wanting Buck’s opinion specifically.

There is also the fact that Buck came to see Santa with Eddie in the first place which is most definitely a family affair as far as I know US customs? (We don’t do this in Germany / Bavaria, okay? We have the Child of Christ and around the 6th we gather in the town square and shoot at it.)

It’s even brought up in text with the Elf telling Buck they make a beautiful family - and Buck not disagreeing because honestly it’s just easier and he probably knows how they looked. But yeah. That!

- Also not to repeat myself but the topic of trust is important here! Eddie not trusting Shannon in 2.07 / 2.10 with Chris vs. trusting Buck in 3.03 / 3.09 / 3.10 is important!

Yes, sure Shannon is his actual mother so Chris has stronger feelings for her and the potential to get hurt is way bigger. Yes, Buck was only gone from their life for a few weeks while Shannon was gone for about 2 years. Yes, Buck apologised twice while Shannon just played the victim card tbh (even though she did have a point with some of the stuff she said). But still:

Eddie is very hesitant to let Shannon back into his son’s life (and really his as well) while he does have no such qualms about Buck once Buck apologises to him in 3.06. In fact their relationship returns to normal with Eddie asking Buck for help with Chris numerous times while say 2.15 makes it clear Eddie still keeps Shannon at arms’ length and out of a lot of aspects of raising Chris.

Of course, giving advice to Eddie is not the same level of involved as actually parenting the child and part of it is probably growth on Eddie’s side when it comes to Season 3 but right here: it’s a stark contrast and it deserves a mention!

2.17: „*fridges female character for man pain* Haha, we’re so random!“

- „Ice cream? Oh, I do not envy you putting him to sleep tonight!“: There is the scene here where Eddie facetimes with Shannon and she is out and about with Chris and Abuela and they are getting ice cream and Eddie is all like: damn you’ll regret that later - which is the same thing he says about Buck in 3.02

3.01: „How you know he no sleep naked?“

- Buck gets a card from Chris which is a child thing to do but also should be mentioned because Buck does not get a card from Danny or Harry. And considering how much Buck likes children and how good he is with them we do have to mention that we only see Buck interact with Danny once and never with Harry while it’s been implied several times before the tsunami already that Buck does spend a lot of time with Chris. (Of course, in part this is due to how much closer Buck is with Eddie than Hen and especially Athena but still)

After all the season ends with Chris giving a card to his literal father, tying these two scenes together. And pointing out once again how important Buck is for Chris and the Diaz family.

- Also as I mentioned during Trust there is that parallel / contrast between how Maddie and how Eddie see Buck with Maddie sort of treating him like a child who needs to be dealt with while Eddie is basically like: let’s give him something to do so he feels less useless! (Guess who had the right idea! Just guess! And you have one try!)

- „Are we the only one’s without kids?“: There is also the cut from Madney talking about being the only one’s without kids and then remembering Buck to Buck getting woken up by Eddie so he can babysit Chris which I won’t say confirms Buck being a father to Chris but does accentuate everything he does for Chris after and gives the vibe that Buck does indeed have some fatherly feelings for Chris. It does at least place the idea of the Diazs WITH Buck being a family firmly into our heads.

3.02 „Eddie hates earthquakes - the remix“

- „How’s operation Buck up Buck going?“: Buck sending Eddie updates and pictures of Chris and himself hanging out is just really cute

- Also Eddie isn’t worried about his son at all!

- And we do have that tweet from Oliver Stark about jumping into the receding water at the end of 3.02 being basically suicide but Buck still doing it because the director told him, he’d do it for his own kids.

3.03 „Do it for the trauma - Buck-edition“

- I talked about it before with Trust but basically Eddie, who has parents who are still alive and physically able and love his son very much, even if they have different ideas of how to raise his son, and a sister with at least one child not that much older than Chris and a grandma and an aunt and probably some more family in LA AND Carla who he literally pays to take care of his son, literally tells his best friend he is the one he trusts the most with said son. That is fucking meaningful!

3.05: „What if we fight like a married couple in a grocery store downtown LA, bro?“

- „You know how much Chris misses you?“: The fact that Eddie brings Chris up at all and to hurt Buck specifically is - in part about Eddie deflecting from himself but also about Christopher actually missing Buck, which says a lot about the relationship Chris and Buck have and how much time they spent together if that is something Eddie would bring up here.

3.09: „#tw: mild adult themes & implied sexual content / #pwp - porn without porn“

- „I’d rather be at home with my kid, enjoying the one good thing I got going on.“: Eddie says these words during therapy and where do him and his son spent the following evening or at least an evening that same week? With Buck at his loft. Because even though Buck wasn’t mentioned here as part of the family time Eddie would much rather have, apparently he is part of it.

3.10: „Parenttrapping for Beginners“

- „Well, I thought it would be nice to bring the boys together for a playdate.“ - „All three of `em.“: this speaks for itself, Buck being invited in the first place was … an interesting choice? A dig at Buck’s mental age? Exposition? What exactly, Tim? Like what was the vibe in the writers room here?

- „Hey, Buck? (…) Can I spent Christmas with you?”: The fact that Chris would rather spent Christmas with Buck than with his grandma and the rest of their family is interesting as well and again points toward Buck being an integral part of the Diaz family.

- The way Eddie looks at Buck here and the little head shake implied to me that Buck and Eddie had the same conversation Eddie and Hen have right then already.

3.11: „Bist du single? Nein, eher Album!“

- “Well, that’s what the 118 is. The family we chose.“: Again maybe more subtext than text but when Eddie talks about the 118 being his family the camera pans to *drumroll* Chris, his actual blood family, Albert, Chim’s actual blood family - and Buck, who is basically Chim’s little brother and Eddie’s, well, best friend? Coparent? Partner in work and life? SOULMATE?

Yes, it’s a little subtext, but it’s interesting that this scene shows only one character neither of them are related to and it’s Buck, emphasising once more that these two and especially Eddie (because he’s the one talking here) think of Buck as their family.

3.12: „There’s a horse loose in a hos… school“

- “(…) we should try it together”: Again with the emphatic inclusion of Buck in family scenes! (But this time Carla gets to be there as well - though only to record them?)

This episode introduces Ana Flores as a potential love interest for Eddie and then spends the whole episode contrasting and paralleling her with Buck, as one does …

In this episode as well Eddie gets advice about Chris from several people and it’s interesting that the one person whose advice he follows without disagreeing or trying something else first is once again Buck. 

The episode also maybe implies that Buck was the one to built or buy or find out about the skateboard.

But really what matters here is Eddie reaffirming that there is no one he trusts more with his son (because he refused to take Carla’s advice right away but he did listen and think about what Buck had to say right away - despite his joking) and Buck being included in the family scene.

3.15: „MY therapist also says ‚Thank you!‘“

- „I’m always gonna fight to come home to my family.“: I’m not gonna comment on the lack of Shannon in the montage because I do believe part of it was that they didn’t really have scenes that fit and would have had to film them specifically which would then have to fit into the timeline / storyline before and also mostly it was about Shannon already being dead meaning she is no longer part of the family Eddie can come home to, so it makes a hell of a lot of sense for her not to be included, guys!

That being said I do believe Buck being in it quite a lot means something about how much of a part in Eddie’s family he is! Which is a big part and something I love about them a lot!

- Also Buck was so very happy Chris came to visit and then immediately walked over, which doesn’t really have any relevance except I thought it was cute and this is my guide.

3.16: „The rope was a metaphor after all“

- Obviously it was meant jokingly, but Eddie would have loved if Buck came and not just because being alone with a bunch of 9 year olds is no one’s idea of a fun evening and Eddie could probably use the help (still hoping Carla was there with him and still surprised Eddie was in such a good mood during the pool scene after), but because he likes to spend time with Buck and he did wanna celebrate with him - but he was also very aware that spending the evening with 9 year olds was not what Buck envisioned so he said it jokingly.

3.18: „Traincrash? More like train WRECK? *cries*“

- “Whoa! Whoa! Two weeks from home? Isn’t Chris kinda young for that?“: I don’t think I need to say more about that scene really, I think everyone who saw it understood that it confirmed the 118 but especially Buck being fairly involved in Christopher’s life and how that confirms: Buck = part of the Diaz family.

- Also all the interactions between Buck and Chris at the party both with and without Eddie around I mean, yeah, again, meaningful!

- In conclusion: Eddie, Chris and Buck are family and dems the facts!

Connection and love life

Now, this is where we are slowly going subtext and also really interpretation heavy!

The title might be a bit missleading but I didn’t really know how else to sum all aspects up. Basically this theme is about their love live but also about the parallels between their storylines - especially when it comes to their love life!

Also this theme isn’t organised by episode but by subtopics because I summed up so many different aspects here.

Parallels in their storylines:

- 3.15 / 3.16 and the rope metaphor as a metaphor for their dating life:

Technically the rope is a metaphor for their lives and them letting go of things in general but especially about their dating life because for Eddie in my opinion this is when he really fully comes to terms with Shannon’s death while Buck finally admits to his abandonment issues, in part caused by Abby leaving.

(Side note: the fact that Eddie choose to cut his line just like he choose to actually do therapy to deal with his issues for Christopher’s sake while Buck’s burns away and he is literally forced to deal with his issues through being confronted with Red and running into Abby at the train crash is … something.)

Their dating life is being paralleled:

This really isn’t technically something that explains why you should ship them but I do think it’s interesting that from the get go their love lives have been happening in parallels / contrasts to each other? As if they were connected? Magnets?

So yeah, that and also it goes like this:

- 2.01: Eddie references Buck being single

- 2.02 / 2.03: Eddie first mentions Shannon but indicates a break-up / Buck meets Ali and seems to bond with her

- 2.04: both refuse to hook up with any of the girls at the bar and don’t want to date because they consider themselves taken (I know Eddie says it’s about Chris but Buck called bullshit here and text told us to trust Buck on what he says about Eddie)

- 2.06: Buck flirts with Taylor and Eddie acts a bit jealous

- 2.07: While Buck finally comes to term with his break up with Abby in her absence, Shannon returns and we learn that Eddie has sort of been holding out hope so far (they kiss in the end) (Also Eddie and Shannon and Buck and Taylor both happen in parking lots which probably only means they ran out of location money but still!)

- 2.08: Buck hooks up with Taylor, then meets with Ali and begins dating her

- 2.10: it’s revealed that Eddie has been sleeping with Shannon and Buck is miffed

- 2.11 - 2.16: we get a few mentions of Ali and some scenes between Eddie and Shannon reminding us both these relationships are happening and they are growing closer

- 2.17: Shannon thinks she is pregnant, Eddie wonders about their relationship, Shannon wants a divorce but dies before they can go through with it

- 2.18: Buck gets a new apartment because of Ali, their relationship seems ready to become more serious, then Buck gets hurt and Ali is traumatised by this and tells Buck she needs to rethink the relationship

- 3.01: it is revealed that Ali and Buck broke up

- 3a: both of them work through the trauma of the past few months, no references to either of them dating are made, romantic and / or domestic scenes happen between them instead, the ambiguous „us“ happens

- 3.11: they are asked about their relationship-status to remind us about them being single (AND THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER? Wow.)

- 3.12: It’s pointed out again that Buck is single but he says he prefers it that way while Eddie meets Ana and shows some interest in her, then during a call Buck indicates that he might not be as happy being single as he told Madney and Josh while also seeming a bit happy Eddie won’t be dating Ana (probably)

- 3.15: Eddie finally fully comes to terms with his past, including his relationship with Shannon and her dying

- 3.16: Buck reveals he might still be hung up on what happened with Abby and he realises he needs to move on, the ambiguous „Us“ is brought back

- 3.18: Buck runs into Abby and actually moves on

- Side note: considering 2.08 and 2.10 and 3.09 and some remarks made throughout the show, Buck and Eddie are somewhat aware of the relationship struggles the other had which isn’t really relevant but also sort of is

Parallels with canon couples

This is TV and TV and especially shipping lives through tropes and parallels inside the story to subtext tell you something you need to know without actually having to say the words, but just to plant the idea in the viewers head.

For example, and please I am just spitballing here, you are writing a show about Lifeguards. And there are these two characters who are named … Paddie and Tucker. They have amazing chemistry and they are best friends and love each other a lot. Now, you, as the showrunner, are considering making them a romantic item but you need to do it slow cause while you do have queer characters and a queer following this show is fairly mainstream and also the characters have presented as straight in text so far. So you need to do crumbs, right?

Okay, so how do you best do that? Well, Tucker is known as this really caring guy and very open with his feelings and he freaks out when someone he loves is in danger - so you put Paddie in danger, right? Proofs he loves him, right?

But then you want it to have some deeper queer implications, right, in case you do decide on making them romantic? So how do you best do that? Well, lucky for you, Tucker has a sister. And you were planning on putting her in danger as well this season anyways, so you just have Tucker react a bit more subdued here, right?

But then you really want it to hit people, like you need people who are more casual and mainstream and might not have noticed the romantic undertones Tuddie has had to notice that, right? So you put these two episodes back to back.

Except „Paddie Begins“ is set to air first and well, Tucker IS known to lose his shit about people he cares about being in danger, so they might not actually notice anything more. Or they will just consider Tucker not reacting as hard about his sister, Sadie, being in danger bad writing. And you can’t have that!

So how do you fix that? Well, you just change the episode order! Now the episode with Sadie in danger airs first and people will spent a week complaining about how out of character Tucker was and it will be still on their minds when „Paddie Begins“ happens and Tucker goes feral and it will hit EVERYONE! Like damn, apparently Tucker cares more about Paddie than Sadie? Why? What makes Paddie so much more important?

Anyways, this is how you test out an idea in TV and why tropes and parallels are important…

Moving on:

- 2.14: „‚It’s a miracle… bro #nohomo’“: Now I have already written a bit about Buck’s reaction to Eddie potentially dying to safe the kid and while it is fairly tame for Buck it’s still something you usually see a guy do for a love interest (Any of ya’ll watch „Chicago Fire“? Because I watched like the first two Seasons and the main „Will they / won’t they“ - couple had a scene like that about once every three episodes. Cause it’s a trope!)

- 3.02 „Eddie hates earthquakes - the remix“: This is a teeny tiny bit of a stretch and there wasn’t even any nice cuts to anyone in the firefam to indicate they were referenced (which I found odd, considering this would have also fit for Bobby) but the guy who got impaled with his son in law said: „She‘s the love of my life but he‘s her‘s.“ which considering this episode has Buck doing everything to protect Christopher means a lot and I think about it once a day, okay?

- 3.14 vs 3.15 vs. 3.16 vs. 3.17 vs. 3.18 - Losing the love of your life and how to deal with that:

This may be the biggest parallel of all, and maybe I could have included 2.14 as well but I didn’t because it’s a whole season removed. It also seems meaningful that this episodes happen one after the other, making us naturally compare the scenes and see / look for patterns.

But to explain real quick:

In 3.14 Maddie is in danger and Chimney, who is her boyfriend and told her he loves her just one episode earlier, freaks out completely

In 3.15 Eddie might die / is considered dead by several of his friends already and Buck utterly looses it! We are talking frantic screaming and trying to dig Eddie out by hand and running around trying to figure out ways to save Eddie only to turn full on catatonic when none of that works. I mean, his mood turns faster than mine when I am hangry while on my period and that is saying sth!

3.16 could be considered a bit of a stretch but we do see Red lash out a lot when he realises that Cindy, the woman he considered the love of his life and someone he pined after for quite a while doesn’t exist like that anymore.

In 3.17 Athena is put in great danger and Bobby is forced / able to listen to it and while I am not sure if the blank look on Bobby’s face is bad acting, a deliberate but accidental acting choice OR done consciously in a way that mirrors Oliver’s acting in 3.15 - it’s there and it’s a parallel and we can watch it and compare it and see it.

To bring this whole thing home for us they contracted another outside player in the form of Connie Britton playing Buck’s ex-girlfriend Abby, who similarly to Red and Buck, turns frantic upon possibly loosing her fiancé and starts panic and lash out a little, which is fair and also part of a motherforking pattern, ya’ll!

- Another fairly obvious parallel between 3.14 and 3.15 is Buck telling Sue - as the watch Maddie and Chimney hug - that Maddie already has everything she needs when Sue asks him why he didn’t immediately rush toward his sister. Which can be compared to 3.15 were he does immediately rush to Eddie’s side and support and hug him!

-  I’ve already written about 700 words on 3.17 and the line „Buck invites Eddie“ so I’ll just point you back toward that part of the guide where I pointed out that Buddie was actively compared to the three main canon pairings here. Which is a lot and also could have been avoided and probably queerbaiting.

- Again, teeny tiny bit of a stretch maybe but like, we’re here to talk about anything in canon pointing toward Buddie and also this is my guide and I do what I want but in 3.18 we learn that Abby is now engaged to a single father and considering she was only gone for about two years (Season 2 takes place over the course of one year and in 3.13 we learn that Madney has been dating for just under 11 months so unless there was a time jump somewhere in the last 5 episodes we weren’t really told about, we clock in at about 2 years and maybe one or two months, tops, at the end of Season 3), they have been together for less than that time, even if we think Abby already knew him when she was still dating Buck. Which timeline wise puts them meeting maybe around the time Buck met Eddie, maybe a bit after, meaning Abby met and began dating and fell in love with and decided to marry a single father in the same timespan Buddie did … whatever it is they are doing! Which is meaningful because for the viewing of the Abby/Buck relationship which I am glad more and more people are realising was very unbalanced and provides an interesting parallel to Buddie because this means Abby and Buck met and developed feelings for a single father around the same time. Idk, I understand that the whole father thing was to make Buck care even more but damn, it’s a parallel so I mention it!

- Michael and Doctor Hale vs Eddie and Ana (3.17/3.18 vs. 3.12ff.)

Now, of course we need to realise that Eddie and Michael are fairly different characters and Michael has way less relationship related baggage than Eddie has which is why he goes after what he wants way faster (also, carpe diem, he just found out he won’t die). Also of course, there is no moral component to address in Michael dating some doctor vs. Eddie dating his son’s teacher, but still:

Michael and Dr. Hale had one scene together and it wasn’t even overly flirty and yet, we knew where it was heading, we felt the chemistry and everyone ended the episode saying: I ship it, more of that - which they did give us, just one episode later. They had some awkward moments, yet the show never left a single doubt in your mind where this is heading.

Now look at Eddie and Ana:

First of all we learned more about Doctor Hale in the two short scenes than we did about Ana in four scenes. That seems deliberate.

Second, while we do realise Eddie thinks Ana is attractive from the get go she repeatedly shuts him down by pointedly saying „Mr. Diaz“.

Third, every scene between Michael and Doctor Hale was romantically coded and we know where this was heading while aside from the initial scene between Ana and Eddie and maybe the second scene there were no hints of romance between the two. In fact in 3.15, an episode that is about Eddie moving forward in his life and letting go of the past she is both mentioned and actually appears, yet there are no hints of romance and romantic interest, not from Eddie and not in form of teasing from Buck and especially Carla, who pointed out Eddie’s interest in her previously. Soooooo…

Parallels with Love Interests

Now, obviously we also cannot talk Buddie without talking about them dating in general and then relating this to each other. In other news: there are parallels between each and every love interest Eddie ever had and Buck and also between Eddie and Abby.

(Side note: I could probably also find parallels between Eddie and Taylor and Eddie and Ali but tbh both of these barely qualify as love interests, especially Ali, who despite actually being in a relationship with Buck we know nothing about (hi, original Ana! You did good and I am sorry people hate you for having boundaries!))

Eddie paralleling Abby

I mean the truth is we don’t even need Eddie paralleling any other girlfriend of Buck cause there are so many between Abby and Eddie!

- Abby and Carla vs. Eddie and Carla:

The biggest one might be parallel that both employ Carla and why. Which is in part because Buck brought Carla to Eddie but goes deeper than that.

There is that conversation between Bobby and Buck about Abby and her mother in 1.09 when Buck wanted to break up with Abby and Bobby basically said: if you wanna date someone you have to love them baggage and all and should be there for them as well - and while Buck did try doing that with Abby, well, Patricia died before he could fully step into the ring and then Abby left, BUT he showed no hesitation after that to step right into Eddie’s life, into his issues, with him. And he even brought in Carla as a baggage carrier, isn’t that nice?

Also the whole reason why they need Carla around in the first place as both of them are taking care of a family member (plus the fact that Christopher is a literal child so even without CP Eddie would need help taking care of him working the hours he has).

Also tía Pepa quite literally calls Eddie a saint and I am pretty sure Abby was called sth similar by Carla and Bobby in Season 1 though I don’t care enough to check mainly because the implication was there all through the first ten episodes about how Abby was such a great person for taking care of her ailing mother.

But really it comes down to the parallels between Bobby telling Buck that a real relationship is about sharing the load and the conversation between Maddie and Buck as well as anything else in 2.04 where Buck is so desperate to be there for Eddie and help him.

- There is also a definite parallel to be drawn between the conversation Abby and Buck had in the Jeep while looking for her mom about how Abby hasn’t had sex in a year and Buck asking Eddie about dating in 2.04. It’s a little subtextual, but between the expression on his face and the topic and the teasing and the walking shoulder to shoulder it does feel alike to me so I mentioned it.

- street fighting vs. the apology: losing yourself

Now this one I love a lot because while it does happen half a season apart and isn’t explicitly expressed on the show: Eddie’s whole ark in Season 3a is about losing control and by extent losing himself because Buck wasn’t around. Abby meanwhile talks about how she found herself after she left LA and how she would have lost herself again if she returned to Buck (which is absolute bullcrap but not the point).

- There are also some parallels to be drawn between Buck, Eddie, Abby and Shannon (and technically also Maddie) and the whole leaving each other thing, with Eddie leaving Shannon for the army without consulting her about it while Abby left Buck for Ireland and then also the lawsuit where in a way Buck left Eddie like Shannon did, being so caught up in his own feelings he didn’t consider what Eddie (and Christopher) were going through.

But we can also acknowledge how it must have felt to Buck with Lena / Eddie taking Bobby’s side like he was once again replaced / left for someone else, much like Abby left him for Ireland and Maddie left him for Doug.

Buck paralleling Ana, Lena and Shannon

Buck on the other hand side parallels Eddie’s love interest a lot sometimes down to the clothes (and yes, technically Lena isn’t a love interest but Ryan Guzman thought she was and aside from the fact that he’s into women that could beat him up (which for once, not judging you, bro) and considering the parallels with Buck … that means if Buck was a woman, well, ya know?) so let’s talk about that

- Buck and Shannon:

I’ve already talked about that one a lot so I will only mention it here real quick but the whole Eddie not trusting Shannon vs. trusting Buck despite his betrayal again like right away once he apologised (which yes, what Buck did was not as bad and far more justified) and letting him back into Christopher’s life IS a parallel, considering for example how Shannon asks about Chris missing her (though it’s been over two years, at one point children just stop asking as we know Chris did) and Eddie telling Buck Chris misses him in the grocery store scene.

Also Eddie not trusting his wife and Chris’ mother with him fully even after they reconciled and him telling Buck he was the one he trusted most in the world when it came to his son is … something.

There is also a little parallel to be drawn between 2.17 when Shannon goes for ice cream with Christopher and Abuela and Eddie is all like, well, don’t come crying to me when he won’t sleep because sugar high and saying basically the same thing to Hen and Chimney in 3.02 when they ask about „Operation: Buck up Buck“ because Chris ate loads of pancakes.

Also Shannon in 2.07 said she needed Eddie to have her back and Eddie says he always did but Shannon disagrees (which might be a little how Buck felt with the lawsuit) and you know, Buck and him agreed to have each other’s backs just six episodes earlier.

- Buck and Lena:

 Now, with Lena, despite her being most connected to Eddie, the first (and second) time we actually see her is in 3.01/3.02 through Buck, which connects the two from the get go.

Eddie then finds out she was at the pier in 3.02 (before meeting her) just like Buck (though he doesn’t know that) and then meets her in 3.03 and she spends the whole episode running around LA trying to find her Captain while injured, much like Buck is doing in the same episode.

I also mentioned in my meta-series how I think one of the reasons why Eddie likes Buck so much was that Buck wasn’t impressed by his military background like everyone else (or his looks, I mean, it was probably more about his looks tbh) and how when Buck started liking him it was really about Eddie and not whatever he had heard about him - yet Buck was / is still never afraid to call him out bullshit, much like Lena from moment one.

There is also the fact that Eddie goes to her for advice and she literally uses Buck’s locker (and will I ever stop laughing about the tape? Probably not, I think it was hilarious, okay?)?

Then of course we have Buck in 3.04 reacting quite similar to seeing her for the first time as he did with Eddie in 2.01, even saying basically the same thing.

- Buck and Ana

Now, Ana is an interesting case because we see her a total of four times and she is mentioned two more times throughout the show and each and every single moment is connected to Buck somehow and sometimes so very unsubtle to.

In „Fools“ we cut from Buck saying he likes being single to Eddie doing parent-teacher conference and yes, meeting some other teachers first but also Ana, showing us that while Buck is fine with being single - Eddie might not be. And then Eddie introduces himself as Eddie and Ana knows immediately this is short for Edmundo - unlike Buck in 2.01 who guessed Eduardo? Also, Carla’s „big blue eyes“ line which is a little clown-y, so take it with a grain of salt that it could connect us to Buck.

Then of course her next scene is Eddie getting in her face about Christopher being hurt. Later in the episode we see Buck reference this on a call, meaning either Carla or Eddie told Buck about it (I am leaning a little toward Carla making fun of Eddie in front of Buck and Eddie then having to come clean about all of it, because I cannot wrap my head about the idea of Eddie telling Buck about having a crush, I’m sorry.) (And will I ever be over Buck being so gleeful that Eddie will now be dating the teacher after all? Because boy was close to cackling which even if he was in love with Eddie at the time and therefore happy he wasn’t off the market - still quite rude for a best friend if you ask me! Like, sure, do that but in front of strangers?)

Her next scene is Eddie coming to apologise to her and she gives her speech about limitations - which we can of course connect to Buck and Eddie talking about Christopher and his limitations before that and then afterwards going skateboarding with them. (It does feel a little deliberate.)

And then of course we have „Eddie Begins“ and you guys, they could have very very easily have either Carla or Buck make a joke about Mrs. Flores and Eddie’s crush in the firehouse scene, but they didn’t! And then we do get to see her at the end where she has one whole line and Eddie barely looks at her and you know what happens? They have a child ask the same question Buck asked at the beginning about ever just wearing the medal (which sounded very not straight in its delivery, Mr Stark, what were you thinking about?), making us think of Buck. Like, it would have been enough to establish Eddie doesn’t feel like a hero if the question was asked only once - twice in the span of 45 minutes constitutes a callback, meaning we are supposed to think of the other scene and that means thinking about the other person that asked, which was Buck.

Is this … flirting

Now, some of these are quite ambiguous but there are several scenes that imply they consider each other attractive or feel like flirting and here they are:

- 2.01: „I think I’ve seen this in porn before“

Now, we all know Buck’s initial dislike of Eddie was about Eddie being to good at the job and Buck being afraid of being replaced, but considering one of the first things we hear about Eddie is Hen saying that boy is so fine it transcends sexualities and considering they talked about the calendar which chooses them based on hotness just before and then all the references to the calendar throughout, it stands to reason that Buck considers Eddie attractive.

Also their whole conversation during the gym scene, what was any of that? I mean, Buck thinks the pictures of Eddie are professionally done which means he thinks they are good which means, yes, Buck thinks Eddie looks good in those!

Plus the whole scene is riddled with (sexual) tension. From Buck constantly increasing the weight he is lifting, while throwing looks at Eddie as if double checking that he sees he could bench press him and the way he gets in Eddie’s face to Eddie’s veiled barbs about the girlfriend breaking up with him and doing the same thing as a firefighter but he was getting shot at. I mean, what was that if not the beginning of a porno? (And here we have our first parallel between Buck and Eddie as we find out later because Eddie, too, has been left by a woman. Now the real question would be does he consider them broken up?

Not to mention that when Bobby tells him at the end of the episode that he wasn’t chosen Buck immediately assumes Eddie was and also is so very happy for his new friend, because he thinks he’s hot (right?).

- 2.04: „Hearteyes, motherforker“

In 2.08 Buck has a conversation with Chimney about his pick up technique and well, did anyone in production watch this episode because when Buddie walks away from tailpipe-girl-emergency he literally does everything he described.

Also Maddie says the words „Does this man crush on Eddie mean you are finally over Abby?“ to Buck and his only reaction is „Cute.“ meaning one) Maddie has teased him about his Eddie gushing before and two) maybe Buck does have a bit of a crush?

- 2.06: „Bucky Barnes murder strut - 911 edition“

Again with the Maddie and Buck scenes!

Basically what happened was Maddie talked about how cute Chimney was but Buck assumed she meant Eddie because apparently if someone says cute, Buck thinks Eddie. This is just a fact, okay?

- 2.14: „‚It’s a miracle… bro #nohomo’“

Like my name for the episode already says, there is this scene were Buck and Eddie stand next to each other and Eddie says „That was incredible!“ and Buck who is already standing in Eddie’s space leans in further to basically whisper the words „It’s a miracle.“ into Eddie’s ears and then lean back a little and I am not sure if that wouldn’t fit better with Subtext but also Buck looks at Eddie like he wants to eat him alive and Eddie looks like he would let him and say thank you after while still embarrassed because he cries during sex.

You know, acting.

- 3.04 „discount!Buck in the house!“

Listen, I am convinced this is all Ryan considering the reaction of Kenny / Chimney and Aisha / Hen but that doesn’t change the fact that they used a take which had Eddie stare at Oliver / Buck’s butt the whole time and I mean, what horrible things happened in the other takes that made production choose this one unless they want us to see Eddie looking at Buck’s butt while Chimney and Hen stand around looking amused?

- 3.09: „#tw: mild adult themes & implied sexual content / #pwp - porn without porn“

Listen, from the moment Buck says „Cause you would prefer working it out in the ring?“ and then does this dorky thing with his arms while Eddie smirks into his beer about how he fought in a cage not fenced in (which, I’m a little unclear on the distinction I think, but I am nitpicky af so who am I to judge? Probably just stuff getting lost in translation) that whole scene changes vibes, going from apologising to teasing. And I think it’s very interesting that this is when Buck chooses to come closer (and then keep coming closer until he is right in Eddie’s personal space while touching his belt which we all learned by now means he is thinking about sex) and they have this whole conversation about who could take who which happens in sort of half sentences and does not feel like they are talking about fighting each other at all.

I mean, Buck keep coming closer, while Eddie stands there rooted to his spot, leaning against the bar, smirking, like every hot guy in a bar ever who knows one smile and a bit of smolder and they will come to him (which Buck does, playing right into it, I mean, come on, bro, weren’t you once a serial dater? How do you not know how to play hard to get?) and holding the beer (you know, phallic shaped obj- okay, I’ll stop here, it’s a reach), occasionally drinking, like maybe he tries to draw attention to somewhere or he has a very dry throat and honestly: this is how porn starts!

I don’t think my writing (or anyone’s writing really, not that ya’ll aren’t talented af) can properly express how very not platonic and innuendo-heavy this scene felt.

- 3.13: „‚Bro, what if I flirted with you in a bowling alley while out on a call?‘ - ‚Bro, what if I invited you out to lunch after telling a friend to say I love you before it’s too late?‘ - ‚BRO 😍‘“

Again, the title gives everything away but like so many scenes between these boys that moment at the bowling alley when Buck channels Arnie and Eddie is all: you’re a dork and also wrong! and then later when Eddie invites Buck to get lunch (which is sort of Eddie’s thing, remember 2.01?) after earlier telling Chimney to tell Maddie he loves her if he has a chance because he might regret it. And to really drive the point home or maybe make it in the first place, after Eddie asks Buck - and only Buck - to have lunch with him, Buck then declines because of a little blood (Evan, come one, you’ve seen worse! I know I have!) - only for Chimney to consider this the push he needed to invite Maddie for dinner so he can tell her he loves her.

So, you know, platonic.

- 3.16: „The rope was a metaphor after all“

I mean, what was that scene in the locker even with Eddie leaning against the doorway all cheeky and grinning like: yeah, come hang out with me! - obviously it was about Buck never saying yes to babysit a group of nine-year olds when he could be out drinking (as someone who works with kids, I approve), but yeah, that’s not what it felt like? So unless ya’ll cannot act anymore this was deliberately a bit over the top and ambiguous.

Jealousy

Now, no good ship works without jealousy and neither does Buddie so here are some examples of Buddie being jealous.

- 2.06: „Bucky Barnes murder strut - 911 edition“

Now, your probably saying: Bucky Barnes murder strut? That’s a tall order! But damn, Ryan nailed that, okay? Listen, we’ve seen Eddie walk out of uniform several times at this point and NEVER before and never after has he struted this predatory. Eddie walks tall and military, you know, the way he stands, Eddie doesn’t strut!

Yet, here he does! And what I love about this scene is that we see him in the background while Bobby talks to Taylor, working out with no care in the world - and then Buck comes over and flirts with her, suddenly Eddie feels the need to be part of the conversation?

And he doesn’t even wait until he is standing next to them to talk, he calls over while still sitting on the lifting things.

So yeah, that one is him being jealous.

- 2.10: „It’s all about ‚not my business‘“

- Now 2.10 is a great episode for Buddie and in part it is due to Buck’s facial expressions in the background and out of focus of the camera when Shannon comes to the station.

I mean, Oliver always plays Buck very intense and expressive and with his whole face but that was a bit much, you’d think he just found out Eddie broke a vow of chastity or had an affair while being married (which technically is what Buck compares it to later so kinda makes sense he looks like that but also doesn’t, Buckeroo, what’s the big deal? Did Eddie show up at your doorstep a week earlier telling you what a punk ass bitch his wife was, or…?)

- 2.17: „*fridges female character for man pain* Haha, we’re so random!“

„Talk to Bobby. Maybe he can get you guys a discount.“: There is a point to be made about Buck just not liking Shannon considering everything he knows about her and has heard about her, the same way Eddie doesn’t Abby, but still. This scene and this line, Buck does not sound happy for Eddie or truly interested and yeah, it’s off and it seems jealous.

- 3.04 „discount!Buck in the house!“

It’s actually not just my interpretation, it’s actually - between the similarities to 2.01 and everything that happens after with the lawsuit and how Buck explains himself - literal text that Buck was jealous here with Lena. So there!

- 3.09: „#tw: mild adult themes & implied sexual content / #pwp - porn without porn“

Tim Minear please send me over some scripts or have someone call me and explain what they were going for with the „You had sex with your therapist?“-scene because Eddie was so huffy and offended and I need to know!

- 3.12: „There’s a horse loose in a hos… school“

Buck sounds awfully gleeful Eddie will probably not date Christopher’s teacher and while that might just be him making fun of his best friend being so very overprotective and short tempered when it comes to his son (Mr. Control has left the building!), still, it reads a little like jealousy over some unknown pretty woman Chris might have mentioned some time and Carla probably described in great detail when she told Buck all about Eddie losing his cool!

- 3.17: „LegsTM“

It’s technically not really a jealous moment because it’s not Eddie being jealous but Buck simply refusing to mention his ex-girlfriend here, but considering 3.18 and also and most importantly the fact that there are only two other people in the truck, one being an unknown firefighter driving the truck and the other Bobby, who very much knows how Buck was supposed to take a hot air balloon ride with Abby, for who but Eddie was Buck concealing her identity for because Bobby already knows?

There really is only Eddie left, who probably figures out what Buck was about as well because bro may not be Buck and his out of the box thinking smart but he is fucking smart and he can figure shit out as well! Yet Buck refuses to mention Abby’s name and for what? So he can pretend Bobby and Eddie don’t know he is still bitter about her? I mean, fucking hell, send over the motherforking scripts, Minear, I am done with you!

- 3.18: „Traincrash? More like train WRECK? *cries*“

While I think Eddie is being more protective than jealous here, he is awfully involved and he is uncharacteristically out of control and emotional here and I wanna know why? Does Abby being back remind you of Shannon? Is it jealousy? WHAT IS GOING ON??? WHY YOU SO MAD, ARMY BOY???

Subtext

Now, I am first gonna talk about Subtext things in general like clothing choices, music and cuts between scenes and I am gonna be honest, I probably missed quite a few!

- One of my favourite is that while Buck wears the same colours in 3.03 as Shannon does in 2.07, Eddie wears the same exact shirt - and considering the fact that Ryan got buff between Season 2 and 3 that was deliberate, someone bought that shirt again because we are supposed to connect these scenes with each other!

- As I wrote before in 2.10 we can see Buck and his reaction out of focus when Shannon comes to the firehouse to talk to Eddie and ya know, why?

- Tim Minear himself said the elf in 2.10 was an easter egg for us Buddie shippers and he also said we can make out of the fountain in the background what we want, so there, Buddie is talking about Shannon and Eddie having sex and how much that messes shit up while a fountain shoots water in the background and yes, that is an innuendo and subtext and I hate it a little.

- 2.13 has this hospital scene I love a lot and you know what? Buddie is basically dressed the same, because the subtext of this scene is these two are alike and connected and they GET EACH OTHER.

- Another scene I really love is in 3.01 when Buck comes in for the surprise party because not only does he not hug his sister or Athene but runs up to Eddie first, Bobby actually shoves Eddie at Buck so he is the first person Buck hugs (and then the hug itself, what was that? The way they hold onto each other for a moment just looking while their hips are still touching?! Is that how you two hug because I want in!).

- Also they are dressed basically the same, should we discuss this as well?

- And still in 3.01 when Buck thanks Bobby and they talk and Bobby tells Buck he’ll find someone better and then asks him if he is doing okay, the first person the show cuts to is - nope, not Evan Buckley’s sister who is also there but his best friend, Eddie! Jup!

- And still in 3.01 when the firefam talks about helping Buck in the firehouse, Eddie first acts dismissive but the scene ends with Bobby saying Buck has them even though he may not believe that right now and half of that is said while the camera is on Eddie’s face who looks thoughtful - only to cut from them to Maddie and Josh discussing the same thing and mainly how Maddie doesn’t know how to help Buck and what he needs from her. Which you know, the episode ends with Eddie basically giving Buck a swift kick in the butt like she though he might need (and then 3.03 has Eddie basically telling Buck everything is gonna be okay, so we see Maddie talking about helping Buck but never see her doing it and instead we get two scenes of Eddie being there for Buck and also no Maddie in relation to the lawsuit but an extreme focus on Eddie? Writers, I see you and you aren’t wrong!)

- Also worth another mention is the cut between Madney talking about children, saying Buck didn’t have any either - to Eddie waking up Buck so he can babysit Christopher and specifically calling Buck „his Buck“ to make us think on their relationship and let us know how close they are and also to tell us to not trusts everything Maddie says about her brother because she gets shit wrong.

- In 3.03 after Buck tells Eddie he lost Christopher and then Eddie sees Christopher and rushes over and and Buck collapses and while Eddie holds Chris after he checked for injuries and Chim and Hen and Bobby hold Buck and Bobby asks Buck if he is okay, well, this whole time Buck is staring at Chris and Eddie and Eddie is staring back at him and Bobby, if you wanna know about me, gotta tell you, I am not okay?!

- And then we have the loft scene and yeah, okay, this deserves 5000 words of his own, from the fact that they played „Photograph“ by Ed Sheeran which includes lyrics about how they will never be alone and how loving can heal and mend your soul and the fucking song ends on the words „Wait for me to come home“ just as Eddie knocks and brings Christopher over and tells Buck there is no one he trusts more with Christopher than Buck and I am sorry, what are we supposed to think here? This show is from the US, these people speak english, it’s not like these lyrics leave much room for interpretation!

Not to mention the whole monologue Buck did about being lost and not knowing how to get from where you want to be to where you need to be before Eddie showed up and then talking about how a few choice words can sometimes be the life raft one needs to get home and how we are all just searching for someone to see us? I love Maddie and I love the Buckley siblings, but damn, she’s not the one he has been searching for!

(And I keep bringing up Maddie here because as his sister she is the person Buck could feel closest to and should care about the most and be cared about the most by and yet all canon evidence points to Eddie being that person! Also she is the person next to Eddie Buck has the most scenes outside the firehouse with.)

- This one is a bit of a stretch but Buck looks very uncomfortable during the whole deposition in 3.05 but he looks everyone in the eyes until the lawyer mentions Shannon and suddenly his lap is so much more interesting and yes, after is when all of them get asked the really hurtful question but still, this is when Buck stops being despondent and realises, fuck, I went a bit to far

- Someone please find for me where the director talked about purposely framing them as romantic in the apology scene because I cannot find the post for the life of me, but never the less: In 3.06 during the apology, in the beginning of the scene we see Buddie from quite a distance and Eddie has his back turned toward Buck and there is a column in the shot to visually indicate the divide and yeah, the whole framing is quite something and the way the camera angle goes from far away making it seem like unbridgeable distance cutting to closer shots and how we slowly see alongside the words hey, they aren’t actually that far apart, like yeah, this scene was something else!

- Not a direct cut but during therapy Eddie talks about how he wants to be at home with Chris because he is the one good thing he has going for him and the one thing he gets enjoyment out of (because he is so fucking depressed and I cry), yet when we later see Chris and Eddie together it is neither in Eddie’s house nor are they alone, nope Buck is there as well, meaning Buck is considered a part of that one thing even if he wasn’t explicitly mentioned!

- During 3.10 when they take the photo with all of them Buck is grouped between Madney and the Diaz family, like right between and not just next to them. Also earlier when the eat Buck sits next to Christopher who sits next to Eddie and therefore on the opposite side of his sister and her boyfriend.

- Yes, they were probably amused by the meddling mom asking then „Are you boys single?“ in 3.11 but come on! They look at each other and smirk? For real? Hand over the script, Timbo!

- Also as mentioned before the fact that when Chim and Eddie talk about family and the 118 being the family they choose the camera is on Albert, Buck and Christopher, no one else is in the shot. And of course the song that is playing here, another song about home.

- The callback to Buck in 3.12 of Ana immediately guessing Eddie is short for Edmundo unlike Buck as well as Carla saying blue eyes (which Buck has) is also Subtext.

- Said it before but: the scene in 3.13 when they arrive at the hospital and Eddie asks Buck out to eat and then Buck changes his mind but Chimney runs off to call his girlfriend because he wants to have dinner so he can tell her he loves her like Eddie told him to do at the beginning of the episode is … interesting.

- I already explained why I think Shannon wasn’t in that many scenes in the video in 3.15 yet Buck was in most of them but it bears repeating. Also again it’s subtext that Buck is part of Eddie’s family and Buck is very important to Eddie and Eddie loves Buck.

- Also the question about the medal in 3.15 and the little boy at the end repeating the question, sorry, were we not supposed to think of Buck here, Tim???

- Also just in general 3.15 focuses very very heavily on Buck and Buck’s reaction - much like 3.18 later does with Eddie. All the non-Eddie scenes feature Buck and Buck freaking out about Eddie potentially dying and Buck making plans and being frantic and the driving force of hope cause homeboy cannot even for a second entertain any thoughts on Eddie’s passing.

- The rope metaphor in 3.15 / 3.16 is of course also subtext but I already explained that one and don’t have anything to add really.

- This one is a little bit of a stretch but I do think there is a reason Eddie was the first one to be taken out of the equation in 3.16 and because of his son and not a love interest.

- Also the pool playing scene in 3.16 there visually we see Eddie and Buck together in nearly all shots, there are two shots of Eddie without Buck in it but not a single one of Buck without Eddie in it and considering camera angles and actors literally being told were to stand it is deliberate that Buck is only seen with Eddie by his side here.

- I’m repeating a lot of things here but Buck refuses to say Abby’s name in 3.17 even though Bobby clearly knows who he is talking about.

- „No. He stopped waiting for me a long time ago.“ cuts to „Summer Camp?“ I mean sorry, what were we supposed to think here? Because this does imply he really did stop waiting because now he has Christopher and Eddie!

- Not to mention it sort of hammers home what I wrote before how Abby is dating a single father and Buck is sort of dating a single father.

- Also 3.18 puts a lot of focus in general on Eddie and his reaction to everything when say, Bobby, who actually knows Abby and was there for the relationship would have made more sense - unless they are pushing an agenda here!

The first person we have Abby interacting with at the traincrash is Eddie and then Buck joins them and the scene literally goes: Eddie *talking to Abby* > cut to Buck, coming closer > Buck: „Abby?“ > cut to both Abby and *Eddie* > Abby: „Buck?“ while the camera is still on her and Eddie > cut to just Eddie’s face having a realisation > cut to Buck

So sorry, why do we focus so much on Eddie here, Mrs. Lynch? Is there a particular reason, oh director, who art also directed 3.01 and which has also loads of Buddie subtext?

There is also Eddie coming to stand visually between Abby and Buck when Sam is loaded into the ambulance as if he is physically putting himself between them and then Buck running back toward the traincrash and Eddie following him after and all the shots of them and Christopher during the party together and once again having Bobby asking Buck if he is okay visually connected to Eddie, though in reverse this time because the scene goes from Eddie and Chris having fun to Buck and Bobby talking. (And should we talk about how this is the first time Buck actually answers the question because finally he has an answer or are we thinking about that right before sleep today when it’s easier to cry?)

- Also very interesting subtext is the fact that Buck and Eddie wear nearly the exact same colour and a similar cut pullover when Buck talks to Abby at the end and when Eddie says goodbye to Christopher and I mean, thematically both scenes are about saying good bye and letting someone go? But also it connects Buddie with each other and connects these scenes, which Idc, I probably wouldn’t have done without the clothes?

Not sold seperatly

- Also subtext / visual thing is the fact that Buddie is basically always with and next to each other at the firehouse and on calls (and before anyone says: well, they are partners, Hen and Chim aren’t as much), and that is a long list so I am just giving examples: in 2.05 they sit next to each other at the table while in 2.06 they sit next to each other on the couch and in 3.08 they sit next to each other at the table again and then we have 2.02 standing outside and 2.04 walking away from the scene together and Eddie handing Buck a weapon in 3.17 and walking toward the ambulance together in 3.13 and several other times, the point is there are a shit ton of scenes of them being right next to each other in case you thought that was a fanfic thing!

„The Buck lens“ / „The Eddie lens“

I’m pretty sure there is an actual technical term for what I am trying to describe here but basically there are several instances where we see Eddie the way Buck does, meaning while the scene shows us Eddie doing something the focus is on Buck watching this. Sort of POV but not quite I guess? Also the reverse is true as well, even if those scene aren’t as pronounced!

- Let’s talk about 2.01 once again as we have done for most of this meta and finally, finally look at Eddie’s first scene which we all know is sort of gay and the first time we see Ryan shirtless because Tim accidentally wrote a certain quota of shirtless scenes he needed to do into Ryan’s contract and he needed to get started on those right away.

Also please remember while we as well as the core four are watching Eddie get dressed „Watta man“ plays in the background, which, considering we are introduced to Eddie through Buck’s point of view might be the song playing in his head here? Anyways, back to the topic at hand and how we as the viewers don’t see Eddie until Buck turns around and sees him as well. Which is significant because several times through the conversation between Buck, Hen, Bobby and Chimney we see the locker room in the background so they could have filmed that differently.

Instead they had Chim, who stands off centre, noticing something while Buck banters with Bobby about how he will get to represent the 118 in the calendar, then the camera changes angle so we no longer stand between Bobby and Chimney but rather behind Buck, making him centre stage and putting a focus on his reaction to Eddie. In this scene we have Buck framed by two people commenting on Eddie’s attractiveness. Now we don’t get to see Eddie until we have gotten all reactions of the core four to him, with special attention to Buck, both in filming and text with everyone taking a jab at Buck before walking over to introduce themselves to Eddie which leaves Buck alone, watching.

(Now keep in mind this scene also has Hen basically say Eddie is so hot it transcends sexualities while „Whatta man“ plays as Buck slowly turns around and Idk, mate, that does seem shippy to me.)

- Another scene that focuses very heavily on Buck is when Eddie rushes and hugs Chris at the end of 2.03. In fact for most of the scene we see Buck in the car watching them.

- Also, the hospital scene in 2.04 and how once again we see Eddie interact with Chris while Eddie watches them because fuck knows why.

- Similar to the Buck lens we have 3.10 where Eddie talks to Hen about Chris while the two (or rather Eddie since he sits at the centre) watch Buck play with Chris and Danny. This is significant because Buck is also placed in the middle, putting him opposite Eddie and also making him the focus of the camera for most shots when the scene was about Christopher and Eddie feeling guilty. Huh, we say!

- Something similar happens in 3.11, which is the next episode several months removed when Eddie talks to Chimney about the 118 being their family and while this time Chris is the one sitting in the front, Buck once again is in the middle and also in focus in a scene shot from Eddie’s POV.

Other people reacting to them / commenting on them

Now, I am not sure if this is really Subtext but who knows where else it fits in? (This is a rhetorical question, only my opinion counts around here while I write!) So It goes here! And I think the title is self-explanatory enough.

- I’m a little on the fence on the Bobby looks because - no offence to Peter Krause - he doesn’t have that many facial expressions in general, but yeah, at the mechanics Buck watches Eddie and Bobby watches Buck.

- Our first real one of those scene is the truly savage tía Pepa who is a woman after my own heart because she says the mean shit to your face and the nice things behind your back because she loves you but she loves vibe checking egos more! And well, she is understandably confused by Buck’s being there at the hospital and asks Eddie who that is and why he is here and gives one of the best lines of the show by being so sarcastic, because oh, you work together? Damn, wouldn’t have guessed from the fact that both of you wear LAFD t-shirts! (I love her!)

- In the same episode Maddie comments on Buck’s boycrush on Eddie and while I am unsure whether that is supposed to make it sound less gay or it’s Maddie saying: Bro, you sound 12! but oh well! It’s a comment on them!

- I loath a little to include the elf in 2.10 because Tim has said that was an easter egg for Buddie shippers and a tongue in cheek thing but yeah.

- Also Bobby watches the whole „It’s a miracle“ exchange in 2.14 with that look.

- In 2.18 we get some text on the screen when they help instagram girl about how hot the both of them are and also how THEY should be dating which I’m putting into the same box as 2.10.

- The fact that Bobby shoves Eddie at Buck in 3.01, like sorry, why was it so relevant that this is the first hug?

- When Eddie / Ryan stared at Buck’s / Oliver’s ass in 3.04 we see Hen and Chimney grin about it.

- I know I have said myself that Maddie’s reaction in 3.08 was due to the fact that she just said: can ya’ll stop gossiping - and Chim and Buck were like: sure thing! and then started gossiping but still.

- There is Buddie flirting at the bowling alley in 3.13 and once again Bobby gives them the look and yeah.

- In 3.15 everyone seems very worried about Buck especially and they keep reassuring as if he were Eddie’s next of kin.

- Again a Bobby look I am unsure of but in 3.17 we see him giving them the look in the truck and yeah.

Other people’s heartache

Now, as I’ve said in the beginning, I didn’t wanna just include my perspective on Buddie, so I asked a few other people about this and while this isn’t a representative statistical number it’s still interesting, right?

(Also originally this Guide was organised by episode and I would have included the comments when the things came up but alas that didn’t work and I think I turned a little grey because of that)

@buckleysbabe:

When i first watched 9-1-1, I had no idea that Buddie existed (i hadn’t been on tumblr a lot at the time so I hadn’t seen gifs or anything) and when i started s2 I really thought they were just best friends, but then 2x10 and the ”you two have an adorable son” scene happened and Buck’s ”thank you” and the shy smile AND I WAS ON BOARD!! That was really the first moment, then I got the confirmation after 3x03 and the scene where Buck sees Eddie in the tsunami scenery, and then the whole Eddie saying theres nobody in this world....like in that moment I felt like they were seriously in love 😍❤️

About the 2x10: that scene has so many things. Like the water fountain in the back, Chris in the scene with them (like they are a family), then the elf saying what she said, Buck being for a second like ”huh?” and then you see the light bulb going on when he’s like ”ohhhhhhhh yeah” and then he says thank you 😍😍😍 saying HE IS CHRIS’S COPARENT. AND THEN THE SHY SMILE

@theleftboobgrabber

Right off the bat I thought they had chemistry but I think the entirety of 2×04 is when I genuinely started shipping it. Like.... the constant heart eyes, the support, Buck trying so hard to be there for Eddie and Eddie absolutely never questioning it, the look Buck gives Eddie at the fire house was absolute fire (when Bobby tells Eddie Buck asked for Chris to stay with them) like Eddie's like you did this for me??? And Buck has just this massive Big Buck Energy from where he's sitting like "get used to it" and I remember absolutely loosing my mind that Bobby got the hug and not Buck at the end of the scene like in what universe??? And yeah the rest of the episode is just the same but that feeling of 'that's the wrong man you're hugging' was the tipping point

@emotionalsupportfirefam

Okay so mine was kinda two moments?1) when Buck took Eddie to Chris' school after the earthquake and we see his reaction to Eddie's joy and relief as he holds Christopher and then spends the next episode trying to find ways to help Eddie with finding a suitable caregiver/ support for Chris and 2) the fact the took them whole of five minutes to go from 'rivals' to the 'dynamic duo' after the grenade call.

@evaneddie

Honestly? Literally every scene they have is romantically coded. The first scene of them, with Eddie being shirtless and us seeing it from Buck's perspective with „Whatta Man“ playing? That's subtext.

You can have my back any day? Yo.

The scene when the elf Blair(e) said they have an adorable son and Buck just said thank you instead of correcting her before he literally skipped away?

Eddie showing up at Buck's apartment and Buck not even questioning how he got in?

The way Buck is like a second father to Chris and protects him like one in the tsunami?

"THERE'S NOBODY IN THIS WORLD I TRUST WITH MY SON MORE THAN YOU"?! REALLY EDDIE? WHAT ABOUT LITERALLY ANY OF YOUR FAMILY? OR CARLA? Baby, that's love.

THE HALLOWEEN HUG?!

THE KITCHEN SCENE, THE WHOLE SEXUAL TENSION IN THAT SCENE?! BUCK'S HAND ON HIS BELT, THE GLANCES, "I'D STILL TAKE YOU", ON THE COUCH EDDIE LOOKS TO BUCK'S LAP, LIKE COME ON!

"You boys single?" *Looks at each other*

"This is Eddie's house, I'm not really a guest"

Buck's breakdown when he lost Eddie under 40 feet of mud. That was not the breakdown of losing a friend, that was the breakdown on losing someone you love. There's a meta I saw once literally just for this scene alone, the way Buck dug so desperately at the mud with his bare hands, the screams of heartbreak, the way he collapsed into Bobby, the pure dissociation as Bobby was giving instructions later on, Eddie's memories filled mostly with Christopher and Buck. Sure, the others were there, but, it was FILLED with Buck and Chris.

Then the ending scene of the season?! What was he trying to do with the necklaces? Thrusting his hips towards Eddie, hitting him in the face, then that soft touch on his face?

@adamngoodbuck

Hey! Nice question and for me really easy to answer. I started watching the show back in 2018 when it first aired but I was a casual viewer. Very casual. So casual I actually watched everything up to 2x10 and then I thought it was the season finale so I forgot about it. And then season 3 started. And nothing made sense. So I checked and welp, I had to catch up. And I did and something started brewing inside of me. I wasn't part of the fandom yet. And then. The THE SEARCHERS happened. And that scene. The there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you scene. My icon scene. And I was done. Hook, line and sinker.

@the-family-we-choose-118 

My main ones were all the big ones: the kitchen scene, the end of 3x03, the Christmas episode one where Buck is helping Danny and Chris make gingerbread houses and then plans a whole party for the firefam, Buck clawing at the ground in 3x15, Eddie interrupting Taylor Kelly when she came to the station to do the documentary in Dosed, the fact that Eddie was introduced from Buck's POV with „Whatta Man“, the entire earthquake episode where Buck is reassuring Eddie his kid is okay and then drives him to get his kid later on, and the scene where Buck introduces Eddie to Carla in (I'm pretty sure it's) the same episode where Maddie asks him if his boy crush on Eddie means he's over Abby (that was my main one). And I was fully convinced when Eddie walked in Buck's apartment in the beginning of S3 and ripped his blankets off him and was so sure he doesn't sleep naked/wouldn't have anybody over.

And the „official“ part of the guide is done but I do wanna say something else real quick which is:

You have just read about 20.000 words I painstakingly wrote over the course of several weeks and while I get that meta is even more harrowing to reblog than gifsets or fics because meta involves so much opinion and interpretation and what if you disagree with parts of it?

Well, again, I invested a lot of time in this and also: IF YOU DISAGREE TELL ME!!! TELL ME IN THE REBLOG OR IN THE TAGS!!! Because different to fics and gifsets meta is a dialog and I can’t have a dialog unless people talk to me! I’m not here to lecture you on right or wrong, I am here to tell you: okay, this is how the scene looks from my point of view, what do you say? So honestly, please consider liking and reblogging and tagging and maybe talking a little about it with me, because screaming into the void is so very boring

(And also in general: reblog reblog reblog! All these funny posts you see on buzzfeed and instagram screenshoted from tumblr? Half of them were made great by reblogs and all of them were noticed by these sites because of reblogs)

Anyways, before I (REALLY) let you go it would be hypocritical now to not talk about some people who inspired some of this (but ya’ll have to understand I cannot talk about everyone)!

I can however say these four especially helped me write this:

- @diggorypuff , who I have never talked to but whose posts about interesting parallels actually sort of got me into thinking deeper about this show: (X)

- @ingu, who fairly recently did a series of gifsets on Buddie and how Buck is framed as Eddie’s love interest which gave me life: (X)

- @matan4il, who is such an amazing friend and does the most concice and well thought out metas on Buddie without having to watch the show a million times like other people we shall not name have to (me, I am talking about me). Find her buddie metas here: (X) 

- And most importantly my girl, my babe, my love, @chimbuckleys who is the voice of reason between us and always lets me rant about stuff and was the sounding board for this and so much else I have written - I couldn’t do this without you! (ALSO I AM GOING TO BED NOW, BABE!!!)

AND DEAR READER, you made it! Now go have a blessed day and plant some trees because earth is dying and we with it!

[fencer-x]

Fencer’s Big Eva Review

Just got done watching the Eva finale, so it’s time to get out thoughts while they’re fresh! Caveat: Eva is difficult to understand for native speakers, and I’m definitely not a native speaker XD I feel like I got maybe half, and got the rough gist of like 10% of the rest, and the remaining was just no friggin’ clue. Would’ve gone better if there’d at least been JP subs, but you’ll have to deal with what I’ve got for now!

It should be obvious, but there’ll be HELLA MAJOR SPOILERS for the final Evangelion movie. Ready? Let’s go.

The movie very helpfully starts off with a ~2 min recap of the movies thus far. This was great because I didn’t have time to rewatch the previous three before going, and while I’ve seen them a few times, it took me a second the recall what had happened at the very end of Q, so I was glad to get a very brief recap.

The actual movie itself opens on...Paris! Or Paris post-Near-Third-Impact (Third Impact?), which is a red and black wasteland. It seems that Wille has been developing these things that look like Entry Plugs that they shove into the ground and restore everything to pre-all-impacts (so like, blue water and everything); couldn’t get HOW it managed that, but they had them and were attempting to restore Paris.

Would have been a walk in the park except for weird Eva-Angel-Machine hybrids that were trying to prevent them from activating the plugs. Lots of fighting happens, with Mari piloting her Eva to give them cover while the Wille staff set everything up. Eventually they manage it, and Euro Nerv is restored.

Then we switch over to right where Q left off: Asuka, Clone!Rei, and a catatonic Shinji wandering around trying to go who knows where. They eventually get picked up by...Touji! Yes, an older Touji now who lives in a commune of survivors, scraping out a semblance of a life in one of the areas protected by the aforementioned plugs (they had another name but I couldn’t get it).

In this community, Touji is the local doctor--and he’s married with a kid! He married Hikari, and they have an infant daughter named Tsubame. 

Now, let’s check in how our main three do when introduced to this relatively normal life they get to enjoy for a few weeks:

Asuka: Still in ‘fight mode’, ready to go at a moment’s notice. How she thinks she’s gonna fight when she has no Eva idk, but for this entire little bit, she’s either naked or in her plugsuit. She stays with Aida Kensuke, who’s kind of the handyman, and is generally just rude af.

Shinji: For 90% of this bit, he’s totally shut off. He’s incredibly fucked up from having JUST watched Kaworu die, essentially because of him, and Asuka has on a DSS choker, and every time he sees it, he collapses and begins vomiting violently. He stays with the Suzuharas at first but is quickly sent to stay with Asuka and Kensuke because they don’t really know how to deal with him. Kensuke manages to get him to open up a little bit, but eventually it’s Rei who gets him started on the path back to being himself. At one point he runs away and ‘lives’ alone for a while in what I think was either the building where he first met Kaworu playing the piano or one that looked a lot like it. He goes out to do odd jobs with Kensuke a lot, and on one occasion he’s taken to an ‘outdoor lab’ where some workers are experimenting with new gardening techniques. It’s here he’s meets...Kaji Ryouji. No, not that Kaji Ryouji. That Kaji DIED. This is the son he had with Misato (named after him).

Rei: Now, let me say I’ve never been super interested in Rei. I didn’t dislike her, like I did Asuka, but I wasn’t really interested in her either. She was just there. Guys.....I LOVED REI IN THIS MOVIE. I would have watched 2.5 hours of the Rei Learns To Be A Human show and been happy for the $20 I paid. Rei spends her time in the commune learning to be an individual. She stays with the Suzuharas and learns what different words mean, like “Good morning” and “Good night” and “Thank you” and “Goodbye”, she gets super close with a bunch of old ladies who essentially adopt her and teach her how to plant turnips and what a bath is, and she becomes her own person. When she first arrives, the Suzuharas think she’s “Ayanami Rei”, but she explains that she isn’t, so they call her “Sokkuri-san” instead (”Miss Spitting Image” essentially), and the old ladies find it amusing at first but then encourage her to choose her own name, and when she can’t think of one, they tell her to have someone choose one for her, so she asks the Uber-Depressed Shinji to choose one. These interactions are what eventually pull him back to himself, but ultimately he’s unable to come up with one, because “Ayanami is Ayanami”. She thanks him for trying anyway, returns his SD player to him..............................and then dissolves into a pile of LCL fluid, as apparently all clones eventually return to LCL. Fantastic, because Shinji didn’t need EVEN MORE TRAUMA.

Somehow, the above doesn’t break Shinji, and he resolves to go back to Wille and face his father I guess?? I’m not entirely clear on why (gotta go read some reports of my own I guess lol). Back on the ship with Misato et al., Shinji isn’t forced to wear a choker but he’s put in a cell with like explosives in it I guess. He starts having visions of Kaworu helping him accept things.

At this point it’s getting close to the climax, and Wille are going after Nerv/Gendo once and for all. During the final fight, Asuka tried to take out Unit 13′s core, and then she’s not managing it, she rips off her eyepatch, and we see that the patch was keeping the 9th angel bound within her eye, so she decides to throw away her humanity and let it take over to destroy Unit 13. Unfortunately, she’s killed in the end--how? She’s approached by a vision of her ‘original’. Yup, Asuka was a clone herself, like Rei, and she turns back into LCL and she and unit 02 are absorbed by Unit 13.

Eventually the fight comes down to Shinji vs. Gendo, who has thrown away his own humanity and bonded with Unit 13 in the hopes of completing the Human Instrumentality Project. He and Shinji go head to head as Shinji summons (???) Unit 01 from inside Unit 13, and there’s a really REALLY WEIRD final fight between the two that involves some weird animation choices. Lots of storyboards and overly CGI’d CGI, and some bits that seem to take them through the different incarnations of the Eva series.

We also get Gendo backstory by the boatload as he and Shinji have an actual goddamn conversation for once. Mari features prominently in Gendo’s flashbacks so she was definitely one of his classmates it seems, who introduced him to Fuyutsuki. I’m still not entirely clear on who she is/was.

However, through this conversation, Shinji gives the people he’s interacted with most closely/been closest with closure I guess? Gendo, Asuka...Kaworu.

So about Kaworu. Their conversation was VERY VERY WEIRD; it’s made clear that Shinji is also now aware of all the different iterations of their meeting. When they talk, it’s set at the beach where they first met in the TV series, and Shinji says he remembers all the times they’ve met before. Shinji mentions that Kaworu reminds him a lot of his father, and then there are some very strange flashbacks (????) of Kaworu’s that I feel like imply he’s to Gendo as Rei is to Yui. At one point, he’s seen talking to Fuyutsuki, trying to decide on a name for himself and settling on ‘Nagisa’ as it means ‘beach’, where the ocean meets the land. Fuyutsuki later addresses Kaworu, who’s sitting in Gendo’s desk, as “Commander Nagisa”. Kaworu reflects to Shinji that he failed so many times to make Shinji happy, but he’s realized now that that’s because he doesn’t know what would make Shinji happy and it was arrogant to think he knew better. He was looking for his own happiness all along.

In the end, after all these goodbyes, Shinji is left with the decision of what to do with, well, reality. He decides, in a conversation with Rei, that he’ll reset everything--create a ‘neon genesis’--to a world without Eva or Angels.

Our last shot is an older Shinji meeting his (presumed??) girlfriend Mari on a train platform. On the opposite platform waiting for their own train are Kaworu, Asuka, and Rei. Shinji and Mari hold hands and run, laughing, from the train station.

NEON GENESIS EVANGELION GOT A HAPPY ENDING. 2021 REALLY BE OUT HERE WILDING.

My final thoughts:

Okay I’ll say it: the fuck with Shinji/Mari endgame? Believe me, it was completely out of left field even in this movie. They just happened to be the only final survivors. Mari flirted a hell of a lot more with ASUKA and was distraught at her death than she did with Shinji. They were a kind of cute couple in the end, but very ????? 

I’m disappointed Shinji wasn’t the one to give Kaworu his happiness in the end, after Kaworu spent so long and so many lives and realities trying to make him happy and failing. I’m choosing to believe, since these multiple realities/resets are canon now, that he did it in one of them. They all deserve the happiness of their choosing, not just Shinji’s, and Kaworu showed us time and time again that his happiness definitively involves being with Shinji.

I’m sure I missed a lot, because yanno, Eva, and it was long enough as is, but gosh I wish I could’ve understood more of everything that was going on, cause there was SO MUCH WEIRD SHIT.

If I watch this movie again, I will 500% just be watching those “Rei learns to be human with the help of a bunch of old cackling biddies” bits :> Those were THE BEST PARTS OF THE MOVIE.

[luxekook]

trivia love | knj

⇥ pairing: kim namjoon x reader

⇥ genre: non-idol au with fluff and smut

⇥ summary: in which the reader and namjoon become ridiculously attracted to each other over weekly late night trivia sessions

⇥ word count: 5.4k

⇥ warnings: 18+, cursing, dirty talk, terrible trivia team names, namjoon being devastating, low-key exhibitionism, smut in a bar bathroom, oral (f receiving), sub!joon, switch!reader, everyone being nerdy af

Weekly trivia used to be so fun. Your team - The Multiple Scoregasms - used to demolish the competition with ease. You used to be able to think so clearly and answer so correctly. You used to revel in the free drinks earned with your $20 bar credit winnings.

Keywords: used to

For the last two Thursdays, not only had your team lost miserably, you seemed to have lost all recollection past your own name.

The reason? Team Text Us, We're Single.

First of all, their team name was highly deceptive. There was no way that all seven of those beautiful team members were single. It was absolutely ludicrous.

Second of all, only one member of the group seemed to even take trivia seriously. And they still won. Twice.

And last of all, you were high-key attracted to said member. You sighed, thinking back to simpler times before you first saw him two Thursdays ago…

The first thing you saw when you walked into Queenie’s Bar was a squad of middle-aged men debating the merits of Draco Malfoy’s redemption arc.

And the second? Just the cutest smiling boy you’d ever seen in the entirety of your existence. He was tall and deliciously tan, with cute dimples that surfaced suddenly when he smiled at the bartender in thanks.

As you stood in the archway of the bar gaping at this dimpled god, you got jostled from behind by your friend Olivia. “What’s the hold up? Go claim our usual table, (y/n)! I’ll get the drinks.”

You snapped out of your reverie. Cute boy or not, he was likely to be part of tonight’s competition; and, therefore, you needed to annihilate him accordingly.

Nodding inwardly, you stalked past the men who now had moved on from Draco to a heated argument surrounding house-elves and their rights.
 “Hermione just dropped her whole campaign! S.P.E.W. was never mentioned again!” One man thrust his hand through his thinning hair in exasperation, “God, did the campaign buttons mean nothing?”

You cracked a smile as you settled into your usual table in the middle of the crowded bar. You loved Thursday night trivia with everything you had.

Thursdays brought in an eclectic sort of crowd to Queenie’s. The groups scattered throughout the bar represented everyone from middle aged Potterheads to skulking e-boys to nerdy young adults (READ: you) and - apparently - to models (READ: Dimples).

You spotted your roommate Jordan and your friend Marlene hurrying through the door and raised a hand to wave them down. Marlene noticed you first and yelled, “Yo, (y/n)!”

Typically, you would have been embarrassed by this behavior, but it happened each week without fail. So, you just gave a half-assed salute.

The only thing that Marlene, the only extrovert in your circle of friends, loved more than being the center of attention was forcing the rest of you into the spotlight with her.

Her reasoning? Something about comfort zones and shit. Your reasoning? Pure evil.

Jordan rolled his eyes at you and grabbed Marlene, dragging her over to your table. “She needs to be stopped,” Jordan said in lieu of a greeting, “She’s a menace to introverts everywhere.”

“Puh-lease,” Marlene plopped into her seat dramatically, “Y’all love me. Besides, if you got rid of me, who would do speed trivia rounds for you?”

You and Jordan exchanged a panicked look at the mere thought of being put on the spot in front of a large crowd. “You make a convincing argument,” you sighed, “I guess we’ll keep you.”

“Well,” Marlene concentrated on something over your shoulder, “I might leave voluntarily if other teams are out here looking like that.”

You turned, seeking out the team in question, and locked eyes with Dimples. He blushed furiously and ducked his head, blonde hair falling to cover his eyes. His friend to his left, equally as attractive, gave Dimples a weird look and shoved his shoulder. You whipped back around before you got caught staring - again.

“What the fuck?” Jordan whispers-yelled across the table to you, “Do you know that boy, (y/n)?”

“No,” you choked out, already halfway to whipped over someone you’d never even met.

“Well, damn,” Olivia finally arrived, somehow successfully holding four drinks, “What’d I miss?”

“Nothing,” Marlene smirked, “Just a cute boy thirsting over (y/n) from afar.”

“He is not thirsting!” Your disclaimer went by unacknowledged.

“Oooh, we love a thirsty boy,” Olivia slid into her seat next to you and turned around to assess the crowd, “Shit. Which one is he? All the boys at that table are hot.”

“The one with the dimples,” you automatically answered, your mind replaying his squinty-eyed smile in full HD.

“Whoa, hold on a minute,” Marlene whipped out her pen and notepad like she was about to take notes, “Now, how do you know he has dimples?”

“Uh,” you sank low in your seat, “A good guess?”

“Nope, try again,” Jordan cackled, “You twirl your hair when you’re lying, bitch.”

Goddamnit. You released your traitorous hand from your hair immediately. “Fine, because I saw him smiling when I arrived, okay?”

“Interesting,” Marlene scribbled gibberish on her notepad, “And how do you feel about that?”

Now, two long weeks later, you still had no idea how to answer that question. However, you did know that you longed to talk with him for hours and absorb the knowledge he seemed to hold in every crevice of his brain. You did know that a darker part of you wanted to see him kneeling before you, completely at your mercy. You did know that his thighs were distracting, to the point where you accidentally dumped your entire beer down your shirt because you were too gaping at the way he leaned over the bar to order drinks.

And, unfortunately, you did know that he seemed to be equally distracted by you. This bit of knowledge came via your friends; and, therefore, you were in full denial.

“Question nine,” the bartender-turned-announcer cleared her throat, jolting you from your inner thoughts. “Who wrote 1818’s Frankenstein?”

“Mary Shelley!” You whispered across the table to Jordan, who then scrawled the name onto your team’s answer sheet. Satisfied, you shot a furtive glance around the bar and frowned as the surrounding teams all seemed to be confident in their answers as well. Your gaze strategically skipped past the table in the back section of the bar before returning to face your teammates.

From her seat next to Jordan, Marlene spotted something in the very direction you had been avoiding and giggled, “Dimples is staring. Bottoms up, fam.”

“Again?” Olivia rolled her eyes and drank from her dwindling gin and tonic. “He just looked at her, like, thirty seconds ago!”

Your eyes swung to Jordan as he attempted to covertly take a sip of his vodka cranberry.

“Please tell me you all aren’t drinking every time he looks over here,” you groaned, crossing your arms, “How are you even sure that he's looking at me?”

“Maybe because his eyes were glued to your ass when you walked by his table earlier on the way to the bathroom,” Olivia cackled, “I mean, I can’t blame the guy. Those jeans really do make you look thick.”

“And that’s ‘thick’ with at least three C’s and possibly a Q,” Marlene added, shooting you a thumbs up and nod of approval.

Jordan arched an eyebrow slyly, sipped his mixed drink, and drawled,“Well, why do you think she wore them?”

That snake!

“Top ten anime betrayals,” you whispered, eyes wide in the wake of being exposed.

Marlene and Olivia gasped in unison and turned towards you. Olivia hissed, “You bitch. Have you been holding out on us? Have you been seducing him?”

“Question ten,” the announcement blared from the bar’s speakers, saving you briefly from the brewing interrogation you felt was headed your way. “What novel begins with the words 'Call me Ishmael’?”

“Moby Dick,” Marlene answered, “Now, back to the matter at hand. I cannot believe you didn’t tell us this crucial information. We could have been scheming together if we knew you liked him.”

“Like him?!” Your shriek drew the attention of the neighboring table, and you shot them a sheepish smile. When they finally looked away, you immediately reverted back to your murderous state, “I don’t even know his name! And when have you been scheming?”

“Fine,” Jordan acquiesced, stirring his paper straw around his drink, “Maybe you don’t like him yet, but you definitely want to sit on his dick. Am I right or am I right?”

Gleefully, Marlene and Olivia faced you with fierce looks of anticipation.

“Fine,” you sniffed, trying to scrape your shredded dignity off the floor, “Yes, I want to sit on his dick. Is that so wrong?”

“Oh, this is going to be good,” Olivia rubbed her palms together, grinning deviously, "I mean, we already know he's into you. Why can't you just say something to him?"

You looked at her like she had just spoken Latin backwards, "Have you seen him? He’s so sweet. I could ruin him.”

“I don’t think he’d even mind though,” Marlene sighed, gazing over at the boy in question.

Jordan snorted as you buried your head in your hands and audibly prayed for anyone out there to take pity on you.

"We're moving on to our next category, folks," the bar's sound system crackled to life, answering your prayers, "Harry Potter."

"Oh, fuck yeah," You and Marlene - resident Harry Potter dweebs - exchanged high fives. Finally, a category you could probably win with your mind functioning on minimal capacity.

"Question eleven: In the Goblet of Fire, who poses as Mad-Eye Moody, Harry's Defense Against the Dark Arts professor?"

"Barty Crouch," you and Marlene said, pausing for dramatic effect, "Junior."

You cracked up as Jordan and Olivia shook their heads. "I question our friendship every damn day," Olivia joked, gazing off into the metaphorical distance - aka at the wall.

"You love us, bitch-ass," Marlene aimed a kick in Olivia’s direction under the table.

You grinned at their antics and went to take a sip from your beer, only to discover it empty. "Another round?" You ask your friends, standing to head over to the bar.

"Yes, please," Jordan groaned, "Anything to make it through these next four questions."

"Anyone - besides Jordan - want another round?" You revised your original statement aloud.

"Wow, have I mentioned I love Harry Potter lately? Like, yes, ten points to Hogwarts, bitch," Olivia thrust her empty glass in the air.

"That's not even how House Points work, Liv," Marlene sighed, "Solid B- for effort."

You turned to leave. "Wait!" Jordan drew your attention back to your group, "Stick your ass out when you order. He'll be watching." He shot a quick glance in He Who Shall Not Be Named (Because You Don't Know It)'s direction. "Oh, wait. He already is. Go get 'em, Hedwig."

You inwardly screamed at the knowledge that you were being watched by the current focus of your attraction and decided not to comment before leaving.

"Hedwig?" You heard Marlene addressing Jordan as you walked away, "Did you mean Hermione? Hedwig is Harry’s fucking owl. RIP, by the way."

God, you loved your friends.

Arriving at the large wooden bar running the length of the room, you flagged down one of the bartenders and circled a finger in the air to indicate another round. You and your friends came often enough for most of the staff to know your orders by heart. It was awesome.

"Question twelve!" The sound jolted you upright. You hadn't noticed you were standing right next to one of the extra speakers the bar used for trivia. Idiot, you cursed yourself, why must you be like this?

"Why was the Whomping Willow planted?" Cringing again at the volume, you craned your neck and located Marlene, who gave you an affirmative nod of 'I got this, fam.'

"Here you go!" The bartender placed your drinks in front of you, "Same tab?"

"Yes, please," You nodded, attempting to smoothly grab all four drinks, "Thank you!"

"Need some help?" The sweetest voice you had ever heard in your life sounded from your left side. You slowly turned your head to face its source and was equally as stunned by the beautiful boy in front of you.

This was one of Dimples’ teammates - one of the Team Text Us, We're Single boys.

"Um," your brain resembled the scene from Spongebob where he forgot his name. Your eyes darted over the boy's shoulder in a deliberate attempt to avoid his cute scrunched eyes and wide smile. But, you were only faced with something even more devastating.

Six boys openly gaped at you from the back table. When you caught their eyes, three looked away, two grinned shamelessly, and one blushed right to the tips of his ears.

Cute. Your insides turned to mush over how adorable your Dimples was.

"They're the worst, right?” The boy in front of you commanded your attention once more, "So nosy. Now, let me help you. I'm Jimin, by the way, from Team Text--"

"Us, We're Single," you finished, "Yeah, you guys beat us the last two Thursdays. We had such a nice winning streak going, too."

"Well, if it makes you feel any better," Jimin smiled wide, "Most of us don't even care about trivia."

"That makes it even worse," you groaned, sliding two drinks his way, "I'm (y/n), from The Multiple--"

"Scoregasms," Jimin laughed, "Awesome name."

"Thanks!" Your confidence soared at his praise and you smiled genuinely, "It's some of my best work."

"Question thirteen!"

"Oh shit," Jimin muttered, "Let's go before I miss any more questions. Joon will have my ass on a platter."

You nodded, mind whirring to try to determine which team member this 'Joon' was. Maybe the intimidating-looking boy with the bleached blonde hair pushed back in a headband? Or the really muscular one in all black with the doe eyes and long brown hair?

"When Dumbledore and Harry first visit Horace Slughorn, what is he disguised as?"

At the question, you grabbed the two remaining drinks and head back to your table with Jimin following close behind. As soon as you began your journey, you rolled your eyes at the completely obvious way your friends were pretending they hadn’t been watching you and Jimin interact this entire time.

You had never seen them having such an animated conversation about... "Bagels are so good! I love how you can choose from so many different types, like cinnamon raisin, sesame, blueberry, honey wheat--"

"Hi," you forcefully placed the drinks down in front of your friends and succeeded in interrupting Marlene's riveting tirade about bagels, "This is Jimin. He was kind enough to help me."

"Hey, Jimin," Jordan eyed the boy appreciatively, "Decided to scope out the competition, huh?"

"Honestly, sort of," Jimin chuckled. Your eyes narrowed suspiciously, not liking the sly edge his grin took on in the slightest.

"Well, hopefully (y/n) didn't give much away," Olivia giggled, staring up at Jimin with heart eyes, "She's our team leader."

"Damn straight." You plopped back down in your chair, "Want to sit with us? We can grab an extra chair from a nearby table."

"Nah," Jimin glanced over his shoulder at where his teammates were probably still staring, "I should get back. Want to hang out after trivia though? We can merge tables!"

Before you could even answer, Marlene enthused, "Yes! That would be so fun. Don't you think, (y/n)?"

You gave her your most lethal side-eye, catching onto what seemed to be happening here, "Yes... so fun."

"Great!" Jimin ignored your dry tone, "Talk to you later then!"

You all watched as he sauntered away.

"Damn," Olivia sighed, "That boy is fine." You nodded sagely as your eyes stayed glued to Jimin's firm ass as he walked away in those tight jeans.

"So, what's the plan, team?" Jordan clapped, "We have T minus twenty minutes to get 'Operation Get (y/n) Dicked Down' up and running. Let's do this."

God, you hated your friends.

Twenty minutes later, your team had solidly lost. However, unlike the last two weeks, your loss did not come as a surprise or alongside any hard feelings. You four were too busy prepping to hang out with seven intimidatingly hot boys.

You were the only one not excited.

“And that concludes trivia for tonight, folks,” the bartender announced, “Team Text Us, We’re Single wins once again. Please come to the bar to collect your bar credits, lads.”

“Oh my god, okay, it’s happening,” Jordan bounced up and down in his seat as you all watched the bar start to clear out, “Stay calm. Stay fucking calm.”

“I don’t know how you have any room to call (y/n) and I nerds while you straight up quote The Office, Jord,” Marlene laughed.

“The Office is an Emmy award-winning show,” Jordan sniffed, “Come at me when Harry Potter wins a Pulitzer.”

“The Pulitzer is only for American authors,” Marlene cried.

“I rest my case,” Jordan lifted his glass.

“What?” Marlene yelped, “That makes literally no sense.”

“As much as I hate to interrupt this fascinating argument,” Olivia drawled, “We’re being summoned.”

You gulped, glancing behind you. Sure enough, Jimin was flagging you all down from across the bar, while a few of his teammates dragged over an empty table towards their own.

“Shit, I guess this is it,” you sighed.

“Jesus, you’re not going off to war, (y/n),” Jordan rolled his eyes, “You’re literally about to meet the your trivia daddy.”

“Please— and I cannot stress this enough,” you paused, “Never say that again.” With that, you stood, grabbing your drink and sauntering over towards Jimin with all the confidence you could possibly summon.

You heard your friends’ laughter behind you, and you discreetly flashed them the middle finger behind you back.

“Hey, Jimin,” you smiled at the boy as he greeted you and your friends.

“Hi, welcome!” His eyes were completely encompassed by his cheeks, and you internally screeched at his cuteness.

“This is Taehyung,” Jimin gestured to the curly-haired boy to his right. Taehyung greeted you all with a deep ‘Hi’ and a peace sign.

“Yoongi,” Jimin pointed towards the intimidating boy you noticed earlier with the bleached hair and the headband. Yoongi only nodded in your general vicinity as greeting.

“Hi, I’m Jin!” The stunningly handsome boy at the end of the table burst out, evidently unable to wait until he was introduced. Jin blew you all a kiss as his friends groaned.

“Please ignore him,” Jimin rolled his eyes before moving on, “Those two are Hoseok and Jungkook.” Jimin gestures towards the bar where two boys were collecting two pitchers of beer.

“And, last but not least, our trivia leader Namjoon,” Jimin’s grin turned devious as the boy in question raised his hand in greeting and ducked his head back down.

“Please sit,” Jimin gestured towards the scattered empty chairs amongst his group.

“(Y/n)!” Jin called suddenly, his arm flopping frantically in the air, “Come sit next to me!”

Your eyebrows shot all the way up as your heartbeat accelerated. Sitting next to Jin meant sitting next to Namjoon - your Dimples.

Nodding, you made your way over. It would be rude to refuse his request, and you could not help but wonder if Namjoon’s friends were also schemers.

You rounded the corner of the table and plopped down between the two boys. “H-hi,” you offered, eloquent as ever. You sipped your beer to cover up your burning embarrassment.

“Hi,” Jin grinned at you, “Thanks for joining us at the handsome end of the table.”

You choked on your beer, before cracking up, “The handsome end?” You loved this boy already and couldn’t resist the urge to tease him, “Oh, you meant Namjoon.” You shot the boy you just mentioned a sly smile as Jin spluttered.

Namjoon cocked his head slightly as he slowly broke into a shy smile, “Yeah, he definitely did, (y/n).”

Lord Almighty, the way he said your named almost sounded like a confession.

“Oh, this is insane, you fools!” Jin shook with incredulity, “I am worldwide handsome. Not Namjoon. Ugh, I need new friends.”

Jin stood and skulked over to the other side of the table as you all laughed. He was so extra, you could already tell. However, his antics had done wonders for your nerves.

Turning back to Namjoon, you leaned in closer, “Did he just make an Always Sunny reference? Or was that just me?”

Namjoon nodded, eyes glinting in amusement, “He did. You watch that show, too?”

Your conversation delved into your favorite shows, your favorite movies, your favorite meals. You felt like you had known Namjoon forever with how comfortable you already were with each other. Yet, you couldn’t help but notice how his eyes strayed to your lips every so often or how his hands crept closer to your thigh with every parting word.

The boy was into you. You were almost 85% sure of it. So, you decided to test him.

In the middle of Namjoon’s story about the time Jungkook almost burned down his apartment complex, you slid your hand over his. Namjoon paused, and you looked up innocently. He gulped and continued.

You smiled viciously on the inside. Your fingers played with his, intertwining with them, playing with his rings, brushing over his palm.

As Namjoon’s story drew to a close, you tugged his hand onto your thigh and released it. Nonchalantly, you picked up your beer and took a sip.

Shooting the boy a quick glance in your periphery, you found him staring openmouthed at his own hand encompassing your thigh. He gave your thigh a tentative squeeze, and you hummed in content. His eyes shot to yours.

“W-what are you doing?” Namjoon’s pupils were dilated as he blinked at you.

“I just wanted your hand on me, Joon,” you pouted, “You can take it off if you want.”

You moved to shift his hand off you, but his grip tightened. “I like having my hands on you, (y/n),” he said, his voice deeper than ever, “I also like you calling me ‘Joon’.”

“Two more things we can agree on,” you smiled at him, stomach full of butterflies and anticipation. Glancing around you, you realized that your friends were dispersed throughout the bar.

Marlene, Jordan, Hoseok, and Jungkook were dancing wildly in the middle of the bar’s tiny dance-floor. Jimin and Taehyung were bothering the DJ to presumably keep playing an assortment of random songs from the early 2000s. 

Olivia, Yoongi, and Jin sat at the bar, watching the others and laughing as Jungkook kept hitting the whoa no matter what song played. Currently, he was hitting the whoa to Baby Got Back.

Turning back to Namjoon, you find him looking at you with an unreadable expression.

“What?” you questioned, eyes searching his inquisitively.

He shoved a hand through his messy hair. “You’re so intimidating, (y/n). You’re so smart and beautiful, and it messes with my brain.”

“You’re intimidated by me?” You arched an eyebrow before smiling sweetly, “I promise I don’t bite… Unless you want me to.”

“I do,” he answered automatically. You both paused. His eyes widened comically, “F-forget I said that.”

“You want me to bite you, Joonie?” You sighed into his ear, relishing in his shiver, “You want me to mark your pretty skin?”

“Yes,” he breathed out.

“Okay,” your mouth descended to his neck, searching for a weak spot. His breath hitched as your mouth neared his thrumming pulse point. Bingo.

You placed an open-mouthed kiss onto his warm skin before sucking lightly. Namjoon moaned, shifting in his seat. 

You bit down, and his hips bucked instinctively. Pulling back slightly, you licked over the mark that was slowly blooming on his neck.

The clear imprint of your teeth on his neck had you grinning like a fool. You really wanted to own this cute, shy, intelligent boy.

You looked up at Namjoon. He was watching you with his puffy lips parted, his breathing hard. “Can I kiss you?” You asked, eyes focused on his. He nodded frantically, and your lips tugged up in a small smile.

Slowly, you inched your mouth closer towards his. Your breaths mingled. You pressed your lips to his gently and wrapped your arms around his neck.

You kept kissing Namjoon until you finally had to come up for air. Leaning your forehead against his, you locked eyes, breathing each other in.

“Can I sit on your lap, Joon?” You asked in between peppering kisses on his reddened cheeks.

After getting a nod in confirmation, you straddled his lap and returned your lips to his. The small part of your brain still thinking rationally reminded you that you were in a very public bar. The much larger and irrational part of your brain urged you on as your hips shamelessly grind onto Namjoon’s. The hardened cock that you felt through his jeans was too tempting. And, besides, exhibitionism was fun, right?

You bit down on Namjoon’s bottom lip, and he thrust against you.

You broke away and turned your head to the side, needing another moment to breathe. Namjoon began to kiss your neck, and you let out a small laugh as he nipped at your skin. He was marking you right back.

Namjoon lifted his head again as your lips parted. His face was inches away from yours. He stared at you like a starving man.

“Fuck, baby,” Namjoon said lowly, “I’m beginning to think you might be the devil, because you just snatched my soul.”

You stared at him. “That was so goddamned cheesy.” Your giggles made him turn an interesting shade of maroon.

“I knew I shouldn’t have listened to Jin-hyung,” you heard him mutter before you captured his lips once more.

As you kissed, his fingers slowly inched downwards, caressing you. You decided then and there that you would have this boy.

“Undo my jeans,” you commanded after pulling away from his mouth. His eager fingers dropped to your zipper, fumbling in their haste. Once your jeans were undone, you felt him hesitate. You instructed him, “I need your fingers.”

He thrust a finger into you. “Mm, Joon,” you dropped your head into the crevice of his neck as he pumped another one in, stretching you. His fingers curled inside you, as you shifted your hips.

“Rub my clit,” You demanded, and he pulled his fingers out and circled it immediately. You moaned at both the new sensation and at the loss of his fingers inside you. “Keep your fingers in me, use your thumb.” You gripped onto the back of his head, pulling on his hair in punishment.

His fingers thrust back into you without warning as his thumb circled your clit. You felt yourself clenching around him, so close to coming just from his hands. Still, you needed more. You were definitely a greedy bitch.

You pulled his hand from your pants, and he stared at his fingers, which were sticky with you. You watched enraptured as he lifted his wet fingers to his lips and sucked.

His eyes widened, “Fuck, (y/n), you taste so good. You have to let me eat you out. You need to let me put my head between your thighs. Please.”

“Bathroom,” you gasped out, “Now.” You shimmied off of Namjoon’s lap and onto shaky legs.

“Follow me in one minute,” you kissed his cheek and tried your best to casually make your way to the bathroom. However, you were pretty sure you had already blown all efforts to be casual as soon as you sat on Namjoon.

Finally, you entered the empty single-stall bathroom and let out a sigh of relief.

Two seconds later, a knock sounded. You barely opened the door wide enough before Namjoon was all over you. His hands gripped your ass as he backed you against the wall next to the sink.

He gazed down at you with hooded eyes, “You still want this, right?”

“Yes, Joon,” you leaned up to kiss him one more time.

Namjoon sank to his knees before you.

You audibly moaned at the sight. Quickly, you tugged your jeans down your legs and kicked them to the side. Your underwear followed suit.

Namjoon cursed lowly as you lifted a leg onto the ledge of the sink, baring everything to him. “Well,” you smirked, “You wanted to put that smart mouth on me.”

“You are going to kill me,” he muttered. His hot mouth closed over your clit. Parting your lips, he caressed you as he sucked and licked. His fingers thrust into you once more, pulling out slowly then pummeling back in.

“Harder,” you moaned. He fucked you faster, adding another finger, stretching you.

He pulled his mouth away from you, his lips swollen and pink. “How the fuck can you taste this good?” He panted as he carried on fucking you with his fingers, grabbing at your ass with his free hand.

His mouth returned to your pussy, circling your clit with his tongue and moaning against it. His fingers continued to push into you relentlessly.

You felt your toes curl as your orgasm approached at a maddening rate. “J-Joon,” you cried his name, your back arching as the pleasure built up with each stroke of his tongue and movement of his fingers.

Without warning, he sucked on your clit harshly, and you came, clenching around his fingers. Namjoon continued to pump them in and out of you, carrying you through your orgasm. He licked your pussy, lapping up everything you gave him with his tongue. After a bit, your fingers wound into his hair and pulled. “Stop,” you begged, legs shaking with overstimulation.

He pulled back immediately and lifted his head, looking thoroughly fucked-out. His lips were more swollen than ever. His hair was a tangled mess. You had never seen anything better. “God, you look so sexy right now,” you mused, reaching a hand to stroke at his cheek.

“Are you guys finally done in there?” You cringed as Jordan’s amused voice shouted at you through the bathroom door, “You have work tomorrow, (y/n).”

“Jesus H. Christ, Jordan! Go away!” You screamed back at your infuriating roommate.

“…I’m going to take that as a ‘yes’,” he replied, laughing, “See you out there, champ.”

“I’m going to murder him,” you seethed, accepting your jeans from Namjoon who held them silently out to you.

You scanned the floor of the bathroom, “Wait, where’s my underwear?”

Namjoon’s cheeks flooded with color as he lifted a hand to rub at the back of his neck, “I needed some form of reminder of tonight.”

You shrugged, giggling as you tugged on your jeans, “Let’s make a trade.”

“I’m listening,” he grinned, goddamned dimples popping out and making you want to kiss him forever.

“You keep my panties; I keep you,” you grinned back at him.

He blinked rapidly, “Keep me?” You nodded, nerves erupting. Had you misread the situation? Did he just want this to be a one-time thing? Shit, had you royally fucked this up already?

He kissed you suddenly, and you relaxed.

“Please keep me,” he mumbled, “I’m a mess, but I can be your mess if you’d let me.”

“We can be messy together,” you gripped his hand in yours, “Now, come on. We have to go face our friends.”

Namjoon gulped, looking rightfully terrified at that prospect. “Or we could sneak out the back?”

A smirk wound its way onto your face, “I really do like the way you think, Joonie. Let’s go.”

With that, the two of you snuck out of the bathroom and out the backdoor of the bar.

“I knew it!” Marlene and Jimin greeted the two of you with triumphant fists thrust high in the air. Jimin whipped his phone out before you or Namjoon could even say a word. “Hey, hyung? Yeah. They’re out here.”

Ignoring the gloating pair, you turned to Namjoon, “We could still make a run for it?”

He met your eyes; and, without a word, you both took off.

Shouts of your names followed you down the dark alley as you both cracked up. This was definitely not how you had pictured your typical Thursday trivia night to go down, but you were not disappointed. No, you shot the boy running beside you an affectionate look, you weren’t disappointed at all.

© luxekook. please do not repost, modify, edit or translate.

[normal-thoughts-official]

With a little help from your friends (the help is praise kink and the friend is your boyfriend)

Who would have thought that fucking your boyfriend senseless cures dysphoria.

Alternatively: being a dom is actually something that can be so gender,

Fandom: It Lives (Visual Novels)

Pairing: Andy Kang/Tom Sato

Additional tags: let's see, mild mentions of transphobic and racist comments, Comfort Sex, the filthiest comfort sex uve ever seen but WHATEVER, dom andy kang, sub tom sato, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Dom/sub Play, Collars, Praise Kink, basically someone says transphobic shit and then tom rides him and talks about how wonderful andy is, except tom has also been in denial for a few days and he's super horny, and andy gets in domspace and everything is great and nothing hurts, Fluff and Smut, Humor, cuz u know these two are incapable of taking anything too seriously, Established Relationship, oh they're both in college and they go to the same college cuz i said so, set after the events of it lives beneath, that's it I think, trans author if that matters to you

Read it on Ao3

Andy isn't having a great day. It's not a terrible, clawing-at-his-chest-trying-to-deal-with-dysphoria kind of day, but he's been trying out this "not comparing everything to the worst possible scenario" thing his therapist has been talking about, so still, not a great day.

The thing is, he thought college would be easier. And it is, in a lot of ways. For starters, there is no evil monster spectre trying to kill him, which gives college at least 5 points over high school. And his uni has a pretty solid queer club, so he knows other trans people there. Some of them are even non-white. Some of them he even actually, truly likes. And most of the time, he feels like he has a place to turn to, and people to support him. He's not alone. He has people who get him. And that makes all the difference.

But basketball is still a nightmare, and his knee still hurts when it's cold, and winter is officially starting now.

People still hesitate to pass the ball to him, and it's frustrating, because Andy fought so hard to earn his old team's trust and now he's back at square zero. And well, Andy has been gaining this team's trust, because he's good, goddamn it, and his team owes at least the last three victories to him. He's not hesitant to say that, especially because otherwise no one will. And he can see that they look at him differently now - nod at him in the hallways, at least, talk to him in the locker room, pass him the fucking ball if his position is very, very open.

But if he weren't trans and Asian, he wouldn't have had to work so hard to get all of that - or well, just that, really. He has a full sports scholarship despite the fact that he had a broken leg, had to retake his last year of high school, and doesn't even have the body type for basketball. If he weren't Asian, if he weren't trans, his team would have assumed his greatness from day one. Instead, he has to show it to them time and time again only to get them to reluctantly admit maybe he's not bad. No one calls him "triple threat" anymore, but he still has to work three times harder than anyone else, and it's frustrating.

And usually Andy can deal with it, but right now his knee hurts, and he can't afford that because he'll lose everything he's worked for if his teammates know that his fucking knee hurts. So, he braved training and then he got the fuck out of there without even changing so no one would see him wince. Which means he's still in basketball shorts, which are short, in the cold, which means his leg hurts more.

At times like these, he's thankful he never got the chance to go through with his promise to break his other leg kicking Noah's ass. Because he would have, and then both his legs would be hurting right now, and two legs that hurt every time it's cold is just too many legs.

No comparing to the worst possible scenario, he tells himself. Therapy is so hard. If he had known there would be homework, he would have thought twice about going.

And that's, apparently, the cue for his phone to go off. Andy smiles, knowing who it is even before he opens the message, because only one person messages him during class, and it's the only person he wants to hear from right now.

Tom <3 sent you a message

Grinning like a fool, he opens it.

Tom <3: dude, im horny af rn. the fuck

Finally, good news, Andy thinks, smiling. Then he remembers why Tom is so horny, and suddenly this day is great, actually.

He quickly types a reply.

You: who wouldve thought that 3 days of denial would make this happen

Tom <3: ill have u kno i was very good at holding it together before today

You: yeah, dw. soon u wont have to hold it anymore ;)

Tom <3: that flirt was terrible, dude

You: said the guy whos calling me dude for the second time in this conversation

Tom <3: what else should i call u? ��

Andy thinks for a second. Tom and him do longer-term denial every once in a while, but they aren't in a 24/7 relationship. Does Andy really want to go there right now? Yes. Well, that was fast. Okay then.

You: how about "sir"

Tom's reply comes fast as lightning.

Tom <3: Yes, Sir.

Andy smirks at himself.

You: uve been hoping that id say that, havent u?

Tom types for just a little longer this time.

Tom <3: Yes, Sir.

----

Many things are wrong with the world, and Andy doesn't mean to make light of the other things, but the fact that Andy can't simply go and fuck his boyfriend whenever he wants is definitely one of them. It should be, like, financial compensation or something. We're so sorry the school environment is transphobic, here, have a free sex pass. Sounds fair to him. But instead, he still has two hours of classes to go through, and Andy is a better guy than he wishes he was, so he tells Tom to pay attention to class instead of sexting him, because he doesn't want Tom to struggle even more with his course when he had already had to leave it once. God damn true love or whatever.

The point is, by the time classes are finally over, his day is back to not being that great; he's tired, and his leg hurts. He gets to their car after Tom does, and Tom takes one look at him, and says, "I'm driving".

Andy crosses his arms. "Why?"

"Because your leg hurts," Tom answers, rolling his eyes and taking Andy's bag from him and putting it in the trunk.

Andy looks down at his legs. He wasn't limping. There aren't any bruises. How the hell-

"It's cold and you're in shorts. I'm not an idiot, dude."

Right. Yeah. Right. Of course. Tom knows. It's… It's alright.

"Bad day at training?" Tom asks, slowly, sympathetically, and Andy feels himself settle in his skin a little bit.

"The usual," he answers, getting inside, and, as always, Tom gets the hint.

---

Their uni's dorms are gender-segregated because these guys have still not gotten the memo that people of the same gender fuck; and Andy wasn't willing to deal with cis college guys' bullshit, much less cis college girls' bullshit; and the uni wouldn't let him simply pick Tom as his roommate. So, they rented out a beat up apartment right next to it instead. It took a little longer to get there, but it wasn't a lot longer, and well, it was worth it.

Tom gets inside, still carrying Andy's bag because he's transphobic and unfair and had taken it and bolted up running so Andy wouldn't have a chance to argue with him. And Andy can't run after him with his leg hurting, which kind of proves Tom's point that he should carry Andy's bag. All in all, Tom is the worst, and he turns up the heat as soon as he gets inside and sits Andy down on the bed, kneeling in front of him to take a look at Andy's knee.

He's silent for a while, massaging his knee until Andy sighs and throws his head back, before Tom plants a little kiss on his knee and looks up at him. Andy's knee always stops hurting when Tom kisses it better. It's a little embarrassing, if Andy is being honest, but still- nice. Really nice.

They stay for a little longer like this, Tom humming and massaging his knee and Andy not meeting his eyes, until the question inevitably comes.

"What happened?" Tom asks, not letting up with the smooth movements of his hands, his eyes big and sincere with worry.

"Nothing. Just the cold. You know how my knee gets."

"I meant, for you to leave practice without putting some warmer clothes on."

Andy looks away. "It was nothing."

"Dude, are you expecting me to go, 'okay, yeah, that totally makes sense and I believe you', or…?"

Andy laughs, despite himself, and throws his good leg up in an almost-kick to pretend he's retaliating. "Don't be an ass."

"I'm not. Come on, Andy. You know you can tell me."

"It's nothing, it's just- Kyle-"

"Oh boy."

Andy laughs. "Yeah." But then he grows serious, "the thing is, he doesn't mean any harm, you know? I know he's not saying it to hurt me, and so that just means that, like... that it's true."

Tom's hands stop their movements, rubbing soothing circles around his knee instead. "What did he say?"

Andy doesn't look at him. "He asked me why I didn't stay on the women's team. Said that I could have an advantage, cuz Asian people are androgynous anyway, so no one would notice that I was taking hormones."

Tom just stares at him in shock for a moment.

"And I was like, 'dude, I've been on T for three years, I'm pretty sure they would notice the changes'. And he was like, 'yeah, but you still look like a lot of Asian girls with short hair, you could write it off if you wanted', and I just…" He trails off.

Tom waits in silence for a second, seeing if Andy finds his words, before asking, "Is Kyle, like, okay?"

Andy scoffs. "I didn't try and fight him, if that's what you're asking."

"No, I mean, does this dude have a screw loose or something?"

"He's very bad at figuring out what is or isn't offensive, yeah, but it's not like he really cares, he just won't go out of his way to antagonize me."

"No, I just- Andy, even when you were a little kid with huge pigtails, anyone would have to be crazy to see you as a girl."

Andy bites the inside of his lip. "You're just saying that."

"I'm not. It's just wrong, man. It was so obvious that it was wrong. Anyone could tell. There's nothing about you that says 'girl' to anyone who's looking."

Andy sighs, finally risking looking at Tom's eyes. There's overwhelming sincerity there, and Andy instinctively looks away. "I guess. Maybe. I don't know. It just got me thinking... Maybe T didn't change anything. Maybe I look exactly the same, maybe it was just hopeful thinking that had me thinking it would change anything, maybe it's just- pointless to even try-"

"No, no, come on," Tom says, and the interruption is so sudden it makes Andy look at him again, just in time to see Tom shaking his head vigorously. "There's no way you believe that. What about this bad boy over here?" He smiles, reaching out softly to caress Andy's neck. "You have more of an Adam's Apple than me, dude. And we both know you don't need T to be a guy, but thinking it made no difference is just crazy and you know it. What about those dry pecs? These broad shoulders of yours? Your voice, I mean, come on. You even smell different, man. How can it be pointless, if even your scent is different?"

Andy looks to the side again, but he can feel himself smile. "Well, when you put it like that..."

Tom gets up, but stays close, putting his hand on Andy's cheek, slowly, as if testing the waters, before turning him slightly to look at him. "Andy. Kyle is an idiot and a transphobic racist who's too damn lazy to realize how fucked up he is. And you shouldn't have to deal with that, and I'm sorry, and I will set him on fire."

Andy laughs. "You can't keep threatening to set every shitty teammate I have on fire."

"I can, because it keeps making you laugh," Tom says, smiling. Well. Andy can't argue with that. "My point is, you wouldn't listen to a word this dude says if it were about anyone else, so don't listen to him when he talks about you, okay? T or no T, you're no girl, and you don't look like a girl, and regardless of whether or not Kyle's dumb ass noticed it, your transition has been doing you good. Remember when your voice started to crack and get all weird? I've never seen anyone be that happy about it."

Andy laughs. "It was pretty awful."

"No, it was great, 'cause you loved it. Do you want me to pull out the 'before' pictures we took in case this happened? Look at yourself, dude. You fit so much better in your own skin, you know? And like, you've always been gorgeous, but-"

"Come here," Andy interrupts, pulling him down because Tom is standing and Andy is sitting and Andy is already height-challenged. And Tom goes willingly, carefully straddling Andy's lap and meeting him in a kiss. Finally, Andy thinks.

Tom kisses him softly, slowly, one hand resting on the back of Andy's head and the other draped lazily over his shoulder, as he usually does, all gentle and a little hesitant, and Andy is having none of that. So he grabs Tom's hair and deepens the kiss, bringing him closer until their chests are flushed together and he can feel Tom's hips mindlessly making little circles against Andy's belly.

They separate - or well, stop kissing, really, because Tom is still as close to Andy as physically possible, and Andy feels about ready to shoot anyone who tries to push him further away. Tom's a little breathless, and his hips are still making these almost imperceptible movements against Andy, and Andy realizes that he's still grabbing Tom's hair and that he's a little breathless, too.

Tom looks down at him for a second, as if debating something with himself, before saying, "and like, not to be horny during a serious moment, but since we're talking about the effects of T... Andy. Andy. Your clit. Fuck. It's so huge now, and it's got a visible head and you can fuck my face and everything, and I could sing it praises for a week and probably will if you don't stop me right now."

"Hmm, but I like it when you sing me praises," he smiles. "Keep going."

"God, I was hoping you'd say that. Do you have any idea how much I've been thinking about it today? I didn't hear a single word anyone said to me, all I could think about was you fucking my face, pulling my hair, making me worship you and beg to be allowed to suck you off, I wanna serve you like you're my God." Tom's hips start to jerk up, more visibly this time, shameless, and see, this is why Andy's been really, really liking this whole denial thing - Tom has only started to explore his subby side recently, a little ashamed of it to admit it to anyone, even himself. But when he's horny enough, he gets shameless and desperate about what he wants, and god, nothing is more beautiful than Tom when he asks for what he wants. He feels something growing inside of him, not sure if it's warmth or heat, but seeing Tom like that, wanting him, needing him, definitely makes him feel so much better.

"Yeah?" Andy asks, tracing a finger over Tom's shoulder, close to his neck, just to give him goosebumps.

"Fuck yes, I want it so bad, and you deserve it too, Andy… Sir. You're the best Sir I could ask for, I just want… Want you to use me, want you to cum on me, want to kiss you all over and worship you and pleasure you, you're so gorgeous..." He hides his face in Andy's shoulder for a bit, but his hips don't stop moving. He whines, "Andy..."

"Address me properly," Andy snaps, feeling the edges of worry clear from his mind and giving way to that wonderful feeling of clear-mindedness, of power, where nothing matters but his own pleasure. "And maybe I'll give you what you want, if you earn it."

Tom nods, hips full on thrusting now, and Andy snaps again. "Stay still."

And he does, immediately, without question, biting his lip and keeping his eyes shut with effort. Andy can feel his thighs clenching and spasming over his, trying to keep himself from moving, trying to be good. He hums in appreciation, but doesn't praise him for it, not yet.

"I'll get you ready," Andy explains, before reaching to Tom's hair, and starts to undo his bun, as slow as possible, just to watch him squirm. He gets so impatient when Andy undresses him, which is why Andy never misses a chance to drag it out.

He begins by removing Tom's jacket, sliding his hands slowly over his shoulders, then down his back, feeling the firm muscle there, digging his nails just a little bit so he can see Tom's eyes flutter in bliss. When the jacket falls to the floor, Andy begins circling the hem of his shirt, sliding until his hands are back on front, fingers just close enough to Tom's cock for him to feel Tom tense in his hands, so damn sensitive to his touch, so needy. God, he can't get enough of this, but he pretends that he doesn't notice, lets Tom try and keep himself together as Andy's hands slide over his belly, then chest, over the shirt, collarbone, wrapping and resting on Tom's throat just so he feels the threat of it, before Andy finally grabs the back of the shirt's collar and tugs, taking it off. Then he slides his hands back down, making sure to run a finger just over the sensitive spot where his pecs end, then lower, over his ribcage, belly, hips, next to the bruises where Andy had grabbed him the night before, then back to the middle, just over the bulge in his pants, and Tom finally breaks and jerks up slightly, letting out a little moan.

"Sir," he whines, "please, please, I-" Andy continues to circle the head of his cock with his finger, "please!"

"Patience," is all he says, before going back to his painfully light movements, imagining Tom's needy cock twitching under his fingers, imagining the effort Tom makes not to thrust up or keep begging for more, just because Andy told him not to. "You know how much I like playing with your pretty little cock. You said you wanted to serve me, didn't you?"

"Yes- yes, Sir."

He hums, noncommittally, not looking at him. "Good." He teases the tip of his clothed cock some more, enjoying the way his mind zeroes on that, the way he feels like he has all the power and the time in the world. Finally, he pats Tom's thigh once. "Get off, and take off the rest of your clothes. Get the lube and a condom."

Tom gets up, a little shaky, and does as instructed, while Andy reaches down to the drawer under the bed where he keeps his dick's spine and a few of their toys. He gets the spine, then adjusts his packer briefs so he can put it on - best purchase of his life, really, those briefs. So much easier to use than a regular strap-on and it makes the packer sit over his clit just right, making a little suction and pressure. Andy couldn't be happier that he was already wearing them.

Tom gets back with everything he asked right in time for Andy to finish making his dick hard, and goes on to put the condom on and cover Andy's cock in lube with the kind of attention that makes Andy hold his breath. Tom's so careful, yet eager, and adoring, about it. Andy feels like the hottest guy in the world.

Once he gets permission, Tom sits on his cock, slowly, getting adjusted to it - admittedly, Andy went a little overboard when he bought his first cock. Andy waits until Tom is fully seated, littering his neck with little kisses and praise for how well he's taking him, how pretty he looks, until Tom looks fully comfortable and ready to start complaining if Andy doesn't start fucking him in earnest soon. That's when Andy shows him the other item he pulled from the drawer - Tom's favorite collar.

Tom's reaction is instantaneous. He throws his head back, moving over Andy's cock as he lets out a breathless, almost choked moan; the hands he had resting on Andy's shoulders suddenly squeezing full force in his need.

"God, you're such a whore," Andy says, casually, and Tom nods, even as he flushes. The collar is just a simple black one, with a little hoop for the leash, but inside they had it engraved with the words Andy's whore, and it left visible marks that could be seen for a few hours after they took it off. It never failed to drive Tom crazy, so it always drove Andy crazy, too. "Stay still," he warns, and Tom nods, breathing heavily, gripping Andy's shoulder as tight as he can as he stays frozen in place. Andy slowly puts it around his neck, checking with his finger to make sure it's not too tight, and the second he clasps it in place, Tom's whole body relaxes, a content little sigh escaping his lips, his face slack and blissed out. He likes being owned, so much. Andy can't get enough of it. "Good?" he asks, just to make sure it's not too tight.

"Perfect," Tom answers, the words leaving him in a sigh. Andy then ties the leash to the headboard, making sure that they're just far enough from it that he'll be feeling its pull the whole time. Tom lets out a moan. "Thank you, Sir."

Andy smirks. "Now, here's what I want you to do," he says, "you're going to ride me, just like that, and you're not going to come until I tell you to. You're definitely not going to come before I do. If you come close, you'll have to tell me. I want to hear you scream, so make as much noise as you want. Do you understand?"

Tom nods again, almost dizzyingly quick. "Yes, Sir."

"Good, then get to it."

Tom doesn't need to be told twice. He starts riding him, slowly at first, trying to find the perfect angle for Andy - not himself, Andy notices, pleased. Once it's perfect, Andy orders, "faster, slut,” and Tom obeys, as always, working up speed as he tries to keep himself upright, feeling the tug of his leash with every movement, moaning the whole time. “Good boy,” Andy says, and Tom’s responding whine is high pitched, embarrassing, needy. He gets even faster then, starting to babble as he keeps on working, and Andy just stays casually in place, not having to do a single thing while Tom works to give him pleasure.

"Fuck, you're so perfect, did you know that?" Tom asks, quickly sliding down on Andy's cock, making sure he puts all this weight in the end so Andy's cock will press down against his clit just the way he likes, making sure to go as deep as possible, "I've been dreaming of your cock for days, god, Sir, nothing's better than this," he hides his face in Andy's shoulder, speeding up even more, thighs shaking with the effort, and Andy puts a fist in his hair and pulls, watching as Tom throws his head back and lets out a scream, working even faster on Andy's cock. "Sir!," he whines, "oh, thank you, thank you, feels so good, oh my god, please, I'm gonna-"

"No, you won't," Andy interrupts, "I'm not even close to coming yet. Keep working, slut."

"Y-yes, Sir," he whines, going faster, deeper, and Andy makes it harder for him, keeps pulling at his hair to expose his neck, litters kisses and bites on his exposed throat, grabs his thigh and squeezes hard enough to bruise so Tom remembers he's his, his whore, his toy.

"I love it when you get like this," Andy says, doing his best to keep his tone even, even as he's a little breathless from pleasure, from power, "I bet you want to come so bad, don't you? If I'd just give you the word, you'd be making a mess of yourself, coming on my cock right now-"

"Fuck! Yes, yes, Sir, please, I'm so close."

Andy smiles. "No."

Tom whines, so cute, adorable, and Andy is nice enough to leave a little kiss on his shoulder, grounding, calming him down. Before going right back to torturing him, "no, you don't get to come for a long time yet. I want you just like this, on edge, tasting it…" Andy grins. "Tell me how close you are, baby."

"I'm- I'm so close-"

Andy slaps him in the face. "You can do better than that."

"Fuck, I feel like I'm going to explode, I'm so close, I want it so bad, and you feel so good, God, you have no idea what you do to me, Sir, your cock is so perfect, it hurts, I need it- need to cum on your cock, Sir, please-"

"No."

Tom chokes on a moan, and starts to go even faster. He lets out a little whine, something Andy thinks was supposed to be a word, but doesn't come close.

"See," Andy says, "this is why I won't let you come. Look at you - every time I tell you no, you get so desperate, so obedient - it's what you want, isn't it? You want me to keep telling you no, you want to know your pleasure doesn't matter, that you're just here to serve me."

"Yes! Yes, yes, yes-"

"Good, then keep going. And beg all you want- I like telling you no, too."

Tom does. He begs, and he says thank you when Andy denies him, again and again and again. Thank you, Sir, thank you for using me, for putting me in my place, I'm yours, I'm yours. And he keeps on praising Andy, praising his cock, his body, the way he fucks him and uses him, no one else makes me feel like this, no one deserves to be worshipped and served like you, Sir, I want to make you feel good-... Until even the clear-minded state of domspace begins to crumble and Andy feels nothing but pleasure, and confidence, and power, and he cums to the sound of Tom praising him and begging, once, twice, three times, until his head is clear again and everything, even the need to chase his own pleasure, is gone, and he just feels perfect.

"Stop," he orders Tom, who's still babbling more and more incoherently, endless praise and worship, and Andy finds that he worships Tom right back. "I want you to get my cock as deep inside you as you can, and stay still. I'm going to play with your dick for a while, and when I tell you to, you can come. You did well today, baby."

Tom nods, suddenly struggling to use his words. "T-thank you, Sir," he says, already frozen in place, thighs clenching with the effort not to move and also shaking with all the effort he did before.

Andy coos. "Poor baby. You were so good to me today. Let me take care of you."

"You always- always do, Sir," Tom replies, and Andy smiles.

He gives Tom a long, slow handjob, making sure Tom stays still through it, enjoying the way his thighs shake on top of Andy's, the pressure of Tom sitting tight on his cock, the way his arms also shake with effort where they rest around Andy's neck; Tom's pretty, exposed throat all marked up around his collar, his breathless little whines as Andy makes sure to do it just the way he likes it, makes his cock turn red with need; watches Tom bite his lip, because when he has to keep still he becomes so quiet and needy, even as the little whines go through his lips… Until Andy finally says, "come for me, baby," and Tom screams through an orgasm that lasts almost a minute, hanging on to Andy as tightly as he can to keep himself anchored through the pleasure.

And then Andy holds him, and Tom holds him back, and they hold each other.

----

A while later, they've cleaned up Tom's cum so it doesn't get all sticky on Andy's chest, and Andy's finally taken off those damn briefs - they're great for sex, but get pretty tight when you wear them for a long time - and Andy holds Tom against his chest. He's humming, contently, and if anyone had told him at the beginning of the day that he'd be comfortable enough to have someone close to him while he's fully naked, he'd - well, probably assume they meant Tom, but still be skeptical.

"How do you feel?" Tom asks after a little while, finally opening up his eyes and saying hello to the world.

"That's supposed to be my line," Andy laughs.

"I feel great. Perfect. Next time, I wanna do it for longer. A week? Let's try a week. Or two weeks…?"

Andy laughs. "Let's not make too big of a leap yet."

"Fine. A week sounds good. Great. And now that we've established that denial is totally bomb for me, how are you feeling?"

"Honestly? I'm feeling great, too," Andy admits, playing with a little stray of Tom's hair, swirling it around his finger, "I think I needed that, a little bit. Who'd have thought that having you ride me and praise my cock cures dysphoria."

"Every trans top on every forum I've ever visited."

"Let me have my moment of realization," Andy mumbles, faux-annoyed. Tom just laughs, holding him closer.

"I'm just glad I could help," he says.

"Please tell me you didn't ride my cock just to help."

"Well, no, in case you hadn't noticed, I was horny as fuck. I just tried to, you know. Use that to give you a little push. Since you wanted to. Y'know. Also, it was all true. So..."

"Thanks, love," Andy says, earnestly. "I love you."

"I love you more."

They bicker about it, and Andy's smiling the rest of the day.

[fizzingwizard]

So I’m sure you’re ALL on tenterhooks to find out what I thought of episode 36... the answer is.... LOVED IT!!!! No I really did. If you like Taishiro friendship, this is an essential episode to watch. Doesn’t blow me out of the water, but still just good.

Although Taichi has a big something to do as usual, it’s still very much a Koushirou episode. FREAKING YAY. I have a dozen thoughts about it, and what bugs me the most, of course, is how we needed this episode AGES ago ugh. But we’ve now had two or three episodes in a row that have actually felt like Digimon Adventure, so perhaps all that finger-crossing is working?

They could unravel all that good work in a minute by never addressing it again... or not letting Koushirou show his personality unless it’s his “turn” for an episode from here on... but you know, I will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Pic of the day:

“I don’t like people. But they are occasionally useful.” - 2020 Izumi Koushirou’s life lesson, lmao

*The red strip at the top is about the big earthquake that hit Eastern Japan yesterday. It’s annoying to have it there for the entire episode - usually they only stick around for a couple minutes - but this WAS a large earthquake. It caused many people to lose power. So making sure everyone knows what’s going takes precedence over Sunday morning cartoons. (I’m in Osaka and didn’t even feel it, but my friends in Tokyo prefecture very much did.)

Lots and LOTS of ranting from a rabid Taishiro fan under the cut!

(also I didn’t check for typos so. yeah)

The episode starts right off by assuring us this is a Koushirou episode. We get the trademark Izumi Koushirou floating in the void of space sequence, which is excellent and very encouraging framing.

Koushirou Kenobi: “Use the force, Taichi.”

Taichi: “Use it yourself.”

(the episode in a nutshell)

The initial thing that bugged me - okay, so the kids got separated for the umpteenth time many episodes ago, and since then we’ve stuck to Taichi like barnacles. The only glimpses we’d get of the other kids showed: Yamato running towards something, Koushirou flying towards something while researching the satellite malfunction, Jou in the hot springs, and Mimi at the crystal caves. For Jou and Mimi, I don’t care, because they never tried to move, but Yamato and Koushirou were constantly moving. Yet, in the end, it’s Taichi’s group that catches up with Koushirou, rather than the other way around. It DOES make sense - it seems like Koushirou told them to “meet at the giant gold pillar” because that’s where they needed to be to save the world, so it became the rendezvous point. But it just bugs me because, once again, all the activity is on Taichi’s side. But that’s a minor quibble. The end result is still THIS:

More of the team is together!!! Taichi and Koushirou are together!!! Yaaayy!!!

... the betting pool for how long it will be till the next separation is now open >.>

Poor Komodomon’s long mop dog fur is so dirty. “Fizz his fur always looks like that.” He’s tracking mud everywhere. “Fizz look at his ears his fur is supposed to look that way.” Next episode - everyone gives Komondomon a bath.

So the start of this episode is just a bunch of talking about how dire things are with the satellite situation. I’m not gonna bother translating. Watch the sub when it’s out if you really want to know :P The important thing is, the gold pillar is directly causing the malfunction, no one on Earth can stop the satellite from plummeting to Tokyo, the city is being evacuated, and there are only 20 minutes till impact.

Koushirou has an elaborate plan which Sora adorably sums up as “So, we’re gonna shoot it out of the sky *makes punching motion*”

The crux of Koushirou’s plan hinges on a repeat of how Omegamon saved Tokyo from the missile way back in like, episode 2 or 3. Taichi says, “Yeah, but I barely remember how we did that.” Which is hilarious because I don’t remember either because it was 30 EPISODES AGO. Once again this episode feels like it was meant to happen WAY EARLIER THAN IT DID. It’s just weird to be referencing something that happened 30 episodes ago after everything else that’s happened, AND on top of that, there are many references in this episode and none from later than like, episode 10 or 12. Making this all seem very oddly timed.

I’m not quite sure if, within the story itself, it matters that Taichi “doesn’t remember well.” He also doesn’t remember the Devimon battle where he and Agumon were infected with dark energy. That one makes sense for him not to remember. If that hadn’t happened, I would just take his “I don’t remember how we stopped the missile” to just mean it was so long ago. But together, it’s making me wonder if something else is going on.

Or maybe Taichi’s just been hit on the head one too many times (okay, that seems the most likely of all, haha)

People of Tokyo: Is it Godzilla again? I heard he’s itching to fight King Kong. You know, given how often our city is attacked by kaiju, some might wonder why we haven’t moved away by now. But home is home, ya know?

The group sets up to fly to the peak of the gold pillar. Obviously, without Yamato, there’s no Omegamon. No one points this out, but Koushirou seems very stressed with his plan, and it seems that he contacted Taichi in the first place because he thought “Taichi’s the one who can pull this off.”

After hearing the plan, Taichi shoots him through the heart with another “Koushirou, you’re so awesome!” and YAY I MISSED THIS SO MUCH!!!!!! *sobs*

Then he does his best to reassure Koushirou by remaining positive and determined that they can and will do this no matter how much Koushirou waves. The majority of the episode is them flying up the pillar while being assaulted by enemies trying to stop them, so it’s not like they get to talk about their feelings (lol). But at least we get a bunch of close ups of Koushirou’s and Taichi’s expressions, and that’s how we see this dynamic in play. Yes, Koushirou is the brainy one who made the plan, but he doesn’t have the confidence to take the lead, so he handed the reins to Taichi. As for Taichi - yes he has the confidence, yes he can do it... but he also has absolute faith in Koushirou. So that’s why this episode makes my little Koushirou fanatic heart skip a beat.

First of the enemies is this guy, aptly named BladeKuwagamon.

They’re actually pretty scary! They do real damage. (Blood in Digimon word is glowy unicorn-like stuff haha). Birdramon gets stabbed, but before Sora can get too upset, she just yanks the blade out of her chest...

... and then crushes it into dust with her beak.

Sora: Holy crap, my partner is metal AF.

Forgot to mention earlier but 5 whole minutes of the 20 minute countdown are used up just by digivolving apparently xD Taichi keeps asking Koushirou “how much time is left” and Koushirou’s panic grows more visible with each passing second...

MetaLiffeKuwagemon looks cooler than he is. Supposedly he’s there to bring out the big guns, but to be honest...

... the BladeKuwagamon don’t seem to need the help :P The enemy’s strategy is obvious: isolate each member of the team to prevent anyone from getting to the top. This is why Koushirou’s so stressed: he’s got a plan that is totally reliant on there being a leader strong enough to pull it off AND there being enough backup to protect that leader from the large number of enemies. And Koushirou doesn’t like these odds.

Garudamon gets stabbed AGAIN

Sora: Go on, we’ll be fine.

Taichi: Are you sure??

Garudamon: *DESTROYS EVERYTHING WITH FIRE*

I MEAN HONESTLY! Garudamon is not only my favorite of Piyomon’s evolutions, it’s pretty much my favorite Adventure evolution. Always has been since I was 11 years old. And she (and Sora) NEVER get that credit. Like. Growing up, with US dub Adventure, I interpreted Sora as more of a straight up tomboy than she is in the original. That’s okay, that’s whatever, but what was most important to me was that I saw her as the third “strong” member along with Taichi and Yamato. Those two were clearly in a class above her, but I saw her as being in the same “Taiorato” league. Garudamon seemed to prove that: she was so cool, so powerful, and... yeah, I just always thought she had so much potential to be awesome and never got why it wasn’t used. That’s also why I was disappointed in Tri - like, I liked Soushitsu, but I just wanted more from Sora’s arc. Same thing in Kizuna: I understand Sora’s arc, I don’t hate it or anything - I think it makes sense for her. But since I wanted something different for her all those years ago, it just left me feeling a bit flat.

but enough about other Digimon series :P Garudamon gets to be super cool here and I only hope we get to see more of it in this reboot. I’ll forgive it some of its other mistakes if we do :D

With Takeru/Hikari and Sora isolated by the BladeKuwagamon, it’s up to Taichi and Koushirou alone to race against the clock! Their teeth are clenched, sweat runs in rivulets down their skin, their hearts are pounding in desperation...

Koushirou: Taichi-san! If we don’t get to the top soon it’ll be too late!

Taichi: Just don’t call me late for dinner!

Koushirou: ASDFGHJKL;’ DAD JOKES NOW?? REALLY????????

MetaLiffeKuwagamon makes life that much harder by knocking them against the pillar. However, this is a pillar of data, which enabled the BladeKuwagamon to evolve into MetaLiffeKuwagamon in the first place. Bugs aren’t that bright.

Taichi and MetalGreymon are nearly submerged inside the pillar as a result, and then we get this sequence of red and black. The pillar had been emitting dark lightning, so I started to think... omg... is MetalGreymon gonna get a Dark Evolution???????

.... Nah. That would have made sense, but.... nah :P

Overall I’m glad though, because that would really have turned this into a Taichi episode instead of a Koushirou one.

I’m not personally certain what the point of bringing BlitzGreymon out was. I had figured he would be like, a super fast evolution that would enable them to make it to the top. That would also have turned this into a Taichi episode. But...

... Taichi tells Koushirou that he will have to go divert the satellite because Taichi has to deal with MetaLiffeKuwagamon.

I was both really pleased and really surprised. Because, again, now what’s the point of BlitzGreymon...? Why did we need a new Agumon evolution? There’s no particular reason why they couldn’t have just isolated Taichi with the enemy the same way the others were and had him tell Koushirou to keep going on his own then. They did do that, but first they gave him a new evolution. Why? Just because it’s cool?? I assume that must be the reason but we don’t even see BlitzGreymon fight xD It’s... it’s weird. But whatever.

Taichi: Go, Koushirou!!!!! You can do it!!!!!

Fiz: *dies a thousand brilliant deaths*

So, Koushirou tells Taichi that he can’t do it - he can support Taichi, but he can’t take the lead. Taichi’s just like that’s wack, dude, of course you can do it. What I LOVE about Taichi and Koushirou’s dynamic is just that: Taichi never sees Koushirou as a weakling. The fact that he’s small, or that he’s brains over brawn, or even that he’s kinda antisocial - those are all reasons an energetic, extroverted kid like Taichi might bully, or at least think poorly, of Koushirou.

But Taichi values Koushirou. He knows how hard he works and is impressed both by that hard work and his talent. What’s more, he doesn’t see Koushirou’s brains as his support system. The whole time Koushirou’s thinking he’s there to support Taichi with his plan, Taichi was thinking, “I’m here to support Koushirou’s plan.” That is SO, SO important. And that’s why I LOVE this episode. The one thing the reboot seemed to really understand, that hooked me from the start, was the way it just GOT Taichi and Koushirou. They each support and follow each other, while each feeling like the other is better than them. Ugh I could like, cry over Taishiro now... omg....

Taichi is successful in pushing Koushirou to go on, but of course Koushirou himself is still plagued with doubts. He reflects on how he’s always been fine being alone. He hasn’t particularly wanted friends and didn’t mind not having them, even though adults worried.

(Side note: this is a normal, if kinda rare, personality trait. I have it too. I always score Koushirou on “what Digimon character are you?” tests too lmao. Just like some people feel the need to be surrounded by others at all times, there are those whose social needs are very very low. I’m one of them. There’s nothing wrong with it except that even those people can get lonely and it’s easy to misunderstand them as shy or snobby. So what I love about Koushirou is, yes he learns to value his relationships more, but also learns to value himself. He is Koushirou: a brainy kid who’s happy on his own, but also happy with friends. While some people, like Mimi, struggle with that aspect of his personality, others, like Taichi, just accept it. To me that’s the best life lesson there is: there are always people who can and will be friends with you. Yes, I’ve lost friends because I just wasn’t social enough for them. But I have other friends who I’ve known for literal decades now. And I REALLY love those friends.)

Koushirou feels grateful that he has AlturKabuterimon, and also that he has Taichi. So... here he is, reflecting on the last time he had meaningful interaction with that great friend Taichi... back in episode three. -____________-

Seriously, this would mean a lot more if this dynamic had been built on continually until this episode...

Koushirou then briefly reflects on each of the other Chosen. Notably, every single solo image of them is from an episode that Koushirou either wasn’t in or wasn’t with them at the moment. Then we get this group image. It’s from EPISODE 12. (I’m actually not sure of the episode number but the point is, it’s from A LONG LONG TIME AGO. I think it’s the swamp episode??) That drives me NUTS. We shouldn’t have to reach soooo far back to find meaningful moments!!! Urk.

Koushirou makes it to the peak of the pillar and AlturKabuterimon attacks the satellite to drive it off course. We see the impression of what looks to be HerculesKabuterimon and I really thought we’d get an evolution - it seemed way more appropriate than freaking BlitzGreymon - but nope.

Oh well. Koushirou still saves the day. The people at home get to see the Crest of Knowledge take over their screens, hopefully giving rise to the idea that a nerd superhero is protecting them. Koushirou is the hero we deserve.

The satellite falls into the water. I was like, shouldn’t that cause a tsunami lol?

... be careful what you wish for >_>;

fortunately people were evacuated soooo things will be okay.

He did it!! He’s so happy! AlturKabuterimon’s triumphant holler is adorable.

Taichi and BlitzGreymon fought hard OFF SCREEN!! OFF SCREEN!! HIP HIP HOORAY! And then we get to see him leaning on Sora T_T could this episode give me any more perfect moments?? Looooove it

So yeah, if you can’t tell, I’m thrilled with this episode. There are just a couple things I would have liked to improve: better animation, at least one palpable heart to heart between Taichi and Koushirou, or just a bit more time spent explictly in Koushirou’s head - but honestly we got something that is pretty darn good, especially for this reboot. I hope we do get more like this, both for Koushirou and for the others. I hope the growth here isn’t forgotten moving forward. I really, REALLY want to see more of that “I lead, you support me - you lead, I support you” mutually beneficial relationship that is the foundation of Taishiro <3

So next week! Mimi’s back and the heads are gonna roll!

Lmao!

My theory that she’s finding crystals to make Crests seems unlikely to be the case now that we know the rocks constract the rock Digimon. But... hey, we’ll find out next week.

Also Taichi’s gonna make this face after talking with Mimi bahahahaha. I can’t wait.

[the-fiction-witch]

Meow p2

TV SHOW THE QUEENS GAMBIT

COUPLE BENNY WATTS X READER

RATING SMUT AF

“As my master asks so nicely” I smiled undoing his jeans pulling them quickly down his legs revealing his hard erection as he hadn't bothered with underwear today I licked my lips as I looked at him eagerly “Just relax master” I smiled gently kissing up his throbbing shaft he smirked biting his bottom lip and leaning his head against his chair relaxing into the comfy chair and pleasure of what I was doing to him, I smiled more kitten licking his head 

“Umm you're getting good at that '' He groans. I smirked, taking as much as I could gently sucking as my tongue toyed with his head “Uhh… Kitten. Come on… More!” He groans and I smiled slowly my sucking even more “Ummm kitten." He moans rolling his head against the chair his eyes often rolling back "Ouh oooohh kitten" he groans slightly shifting and sliding his bare feet on the floor his hands moving aloy from being gripped on me to gripped on the chair, to running across his black shirt, to fiddling with his chains, to playing with hair hair almost as if his hands and mouth was his way of expressing the pleasure he felt "uughhhhhh kitten, kitten!" He groans 

There was a knock at the door which puzzled me I didn't want to move or so anything frozen as it stopped knocking

"Wh- who is it?" Benny asked trying not to moan as I continued to gently suck 

"Mr lancet!" A voice called back

"Ohh fuck… that's my landlord" he whispered I smiled innocently and continued hard sucking and licking all over him "uummmm- I uhh give me a sec just got out the shower!" He yelled back

"Take your time" the man behind the door replied 

"Ummm I'm not sure I can kitten," he gasped quietly "not before he gets mad" I simply have him my most cute innocent eyes moving my head up and down "ummmmm kitten, stop. Master has to go do...master things" he warns "uhh just let me go and I'll come right back to my kitten I promise" 

I speed up pumping what I couldn't fit into my mouth

"Uhh uughhh… ughh okay! Your past the point of no return, uughhh make master cum kitten" he whispered biting hard on his bottom lip moving his hips and chest around the chair running his hands all over himself and me shutting his eyes in pleasure as he tries so hard not to be loud until his his bucked deep inside my mouth filling my mouth with his seed and collapsing against the chair "ummmm good girl kitten, now. Master has stuff to do" he says getting up pulling his pants up so I swallowed and wiped my mouth sitting in the chair nuzzling with it as he went to the door letting the older man in "sorry mr lancet, you uhhh caught me at a bad moment" Benny answered trying not to blush 

"It's no problem, the rents due Mr watts" he says 

"Course yeah, I'll grab it for you" Benny answered going to sort it out 

"Who is Young lady?' he asked 

"Oohh uhhh that's my… freind" Benny answered

"Does she have a name?"

"Y/n, Mr lancet, mr lancet y/n" Benny explained 

"Need I clarify about subletting Mr Watts?"

"Sub let- oohh no no no she doesn't live here. She just stays over some nights and hangs out every so often" 

"A believe the word your looking for is girlfriend"

"Yeah… she's my girlfriend" Benny blushed "I was uhh thinking about possibly adding her" he said rather quietly "you where thinking about it right y/n?"

"I was" I smiled

"Update me if you do" he says taking the rent and heading out so Benny quickly locked the door 

"cosy?" Benny asks coming over and I nodded he pulled me off the seat and sat down himself pulling me back to sit on his lap "Maybe I should let you live with me… Maybe I should keep you as my little pet” He smirked 

"Maybe you should," I smiled nuzzling close to him 

"Pass me my notebook kitty cat, I had a thought about the last tournament" he says so I passed him the book 

"Do you always get chess revolutions after you cum?"

"Usually yeah" he shrugs 

"Maybe I should make you cum more often then" I smiled 

"Well I wouldn't be apposed kitten" he smirked putting his book down having noted what he needed to wrapping his arms around me tighly so not an inch of us was apart 

"Meow" I smiled innocently rubbing my nose in his own he then did something that puzzled me he made a sound not to unlike a growling cat but it didn't sound right before giving my lips a kiss 

"What?"

"What the hell kinda noise was that?" I asked 

"... I thought I'd make like a sexy cat noise back to your meow. I thought I was on to something with that?'

"No Benny. You where not"

"Oh, why do you act like a cat? For sexy stuff? Is that a weird fetish or something?"

"You tell me I meow and lick you and you get a Bonner so" I shrug 

"I don't know there's something innocent and cute about calling you kitten and you meowing at me when you wanna play with me" he explained "do you like me being your master?"

"Very much master" I smiled wrapping my arms around his neck 

"Ummm say it again kitten" he smirked 

"I like my master very much" I smiled rubbing my nose on his own 

"Umm I like my kitten very much" he smirked pulling my lips to his aggressively kissing me I kissed back in our lustfull state for what felt like hours of making out on his chair "ummmm I wanna be inside you so bad kitten" he groans running his hand across the curve of my arse 

"Well why don't you?" I smiled giving his lips little kisses 

"You know why not, I don't have any protection. I wouldn't wanna get my kitten pregnant now would I?"

"But kitten wants masters cock inside her"

"Umm does she, next time I go out. I'll get some, I promise' he says 

I had borderline moved in with Benny at this point and I enjoyed it very much he was out doing something I wasn't sure what he hasn't said he was already gone when I got up so I had tidied up and sorted out until I heard the door open

"Aww good morning kitty cat" he smiled as he shut the door going over to the kitchen to put some bags down 

"Good morning Benny" I whine 

"What's the matter?"

"I got all sad when I got up and you weren't here" I whine cuddling him

"Awww I know, I'm sorry kitty cat. I had to get off early and I didn't want to wake you. I kinda hoped I'd be back before you woke up but shopping took longer then I thought" he explained going and getting off his jacket and hat and such "you know I don't like leaving without a good morning kiss kitty" he says so I smiled giving him a little kiss "and without something else I usually get in the morning" he smirked grinding his hips against me a little 

"Ohh?"

"Umm you've spoilt me kitten, every morning he gets excited thinking his Kitty's going to come play with him' he smirked leaning against the kitchen counter "uhh I've been hard all day for you kitten" he groans undoing his jeans exposing his rock hard erection 

"Would my master like his usual attention?"

"Very much so kitten" he smirked so I smiled 

"Meow" I giggled licking his nose he licked my nose back making me giggle before I moved to my knees trying to look as sexy as I could kissing up and down his shaft

"Uuuhhh uuummm Give master what he needs kitten" he groans I innocently giggled before taking as much of him as I could pumping what wouldn't fit swirling my tounge and sucking hard "uughhh uuuuhuhh ughh kitten! Uhhh I'm already close… ummmm thinking about your sexy mouth all day, throbbing with how much I've missed you kitten" he groans "kitten… do that thing master likes" he begs playing with my hair "you know what" he smirked so I hollow my cheeks and move my head back and forth sucking each time he was deep in my mouth "ooohhh yeah that's my girl" he groans "uuuuuhhh uuughhhhh uhh uuuummmm uuhh!" He groans in his desperation "fuck yes! Kitten!" He moaned pushing as deep in my mouth as he could filling me with his seed before he pulled out my mouth not even giving me time to lick him clean as he did his jeans back up "ummmm let me see" he growled

I innocently looked up at Benny my legs slightly apart my hand on my thigh gracing under my skirt to tease him more, opening my mouth letting him see his cum on my tounge "uuummm such a good little kitten okay. Go on swallow" he smirked so I swallowed every last drop "bedroom. Now" he orders picking me up to my feet pressing himself completely against me

"Why benny?" I giggled

"Because" he smirked getting something from his pocket "masters gonna fuck his kitten" he smirked showing the handful of condoms "go on pet. Master will be there in a minute" he smirked slapping my butt and pushing me towards the bedroom

"meow" I smiled wiggling my butt at him as I headed into the bedroom...

[bihansthot]

I’m not going to lie lovelies, I’m pretty discouraged, I used to post a fic and get anywhere between 40-90 likes on it, the lower number being on Bi-Han solo fics and the higher number on fics that include Kuai Liang too. After receiving only two likes on this the first time I posted it I’m posting it again, this time with a Kuai Liang version too. Just an FYI the versions are identical except for the name, so if Kuai Liang seems OOC AF it’s because it was originally written as Bi-Han. I’m hoping that maybe you guys will show some interest in it now, if not I’m probably going to just stop posting things I write over here, if I do write more it will most likely end up on AO3 exclusively. I’m not trying to come off as overdramatic or needy, but if there’s no interest here anymore, then there’s just no interest here anymore and I don’t need to make myself feel like shit constantly because there’s no one to like things on Tumblr anymore. So, I’m genuinely asking you lovelies to like, comment, reblog, give me some sort of feedback (positive or negative is fine, I just want to know your honest thoughts on it).

 Alright so here we go. My new style OG Sub-Zero (Bi-Han) x F!Reader and/or Sub-Zero (Kuai Liang) x F!Reader a little background on it, it’s set about 4 years before the first Mortal Kombat tournament takes place so Bi-Han is around 28 in it and Kuai Liang is about 25.It’s not explicitly stated though so if you like sexy, older bearded Kuai Liang better then is sexy, older bearded Kuai Liang. It’s flexible. You (the reader) have recently moved to China (because ya know the Sub-Zero Brothers are CHINESE contrary to idiotic Adam Driver opinion) to teach English, as fate would have it the company sends you to the remote village at the base of the Lin Kuei temple. I might do a first encounter story at some point but this particular story is set about 6-7 months after meeting the cryomancer. You only know him as Sub-Zero, but don’t know he’s Lin Kuei, or what the Lin Kuei is, you know he’s cold but don’t know why he’s cold, he likes keeping you in the dark. The relationship has been totally casual up until this point, but things start to get a little more serious as Sub-Zero decides it’s time to take your relationship to the next level. 

Kuai Liang Version:

              You lean back in your chair, stretching your stiff arms above your head as you let out a triumphant sigh. You had just finished up grading the small mountain of tests that laid neatly stacked in the corner of your desk. The week always seemed to last a little longer when you had to grade tests, you didn’t really like giving written exams in the first place, they seem impractical to you. It was more important to you that the kids could speak the language properly rather than be able to diagram a sentence, who the hell needs to know how to diagram a sentence, you think to yourself shaking your head in annoyance. You had moved to China about ten months ago after graduating college, you hadn’t planned on being an English teacher, but you quickly jumped on the opportunity as it meant an escape from your miserable home life. The company that hired you did warn you it would be in a rural area, but conveniently left out the fact that you would be in the absolute middle of nowhere. Surrounded by a sea of endless clouds, rugged snowcapped pillars of stone that were unlike anything you had ever seen and a tiny village nestled at the base of said mountains with a slow, steady river running through it that they claimed was still in Hunan Province.

              When you first arrived, you were pretty sure you had stepped back in time, the beautiful little town looked like it was from the Ming Dynasty, it was like living out a childhood fantasy. Adjusting to life here had been difficult at first, you didn’t miss your life back in America but at the same time you didn’t speak a word of Chinese, you didn’t know a single person aside from the school’s principal and you were most certainly the first foreigner most of the village folks had ever laid eyes on which made navigating your new life a challenge to say the least. You gradually made friends with the other teachers and learned a few simple phrases to get by, but with the language barrier is was difficult and often times lonely, or it was until he showed up. There was one person you met about six or seven months ago that had turned your life upside down even more so than moving half-way across the world ever could, someone who made your cheeks feel hot just thinking about him. You smile to yourself as you think about him before hastily clipping all the tests together and dropping them into your filing cabinet as you grab your belongings and head for the door looking forward to spending the weekend relaxing.

              You make your way home from work, along the bustling stone streets, exhausted from your long week of trying to teach energetic, Chinese pre-teens English. You love your job now, and the kids are terrific most of the time, a couple of the boys still like to tease you every now and then but it had its down sides too like the long hours and tedious, repetitive grading. You slump against the railing of the rickety wooden stairway leading up the hill to your small, quaint home overlooking the gorgeous river flowing through town. From the outside it appeared ancient and picturesque, matching the landscape of the unchanged little village but the inside was updated enough that you never missed the modern comforts of your forgotten life in America. You heave a long sigh before trudging up the precarious steps, “I’ve been here nearly a year you’d think I’d be used to these by now,” you grumble to yourself before unlocking the door. You are greeted with a wall of cold as you step inside, and all your fatigue seems to melt away as a delicious shiver runs through your body. He’s here, you bite your lip as you feel your heart begin to race.

               Cold lips steal your breath away before you’re even able to get your shoes off as even colder hands grip your hair roughly. You part your lips as a startled little whimper escapes you before being swallowed by the cryomancer’s demanding lips. You can’t help but shiver and whine loudly as his cold tongue plunges into your warm mouth and his tall, muscular frame cages your small body against the front door. You stand on your tiptoes as your fingers claw and scratch at the shorn hair of his undercut before tangling themselves in the short ebony locks on top. There are never any slow, gentle kisses like the ones you’ve seen in movies with Sub-Zero, it was always all encompassing and all consuming. You feel like you’re drowning in an ice-cold sea as his incessant tongue twists and curls around your own. You gasp in slight pain and you feel the familiar heat of arousal pooling between your thighs as his sharp teeth tug your lower lip open in his haste.

               The groan he lets out when the coppery liquid hits his tongue makes your stomach tighten in the most delicious way possible. He had been gone for a few days now, off on another one of his “business trips” as he liked to call them. It was evident he had missed you from his obvious erection grinding against your clothed core. You weren’t exactly sure what he did for a living, he was very secretive and evasive about it. You had heard whispers from your coworkers and the villagers about him. Accusations anywhere from him being a member of the notorious Triads to something more ancient, more deadly, something the locals refused to talk about freely. You don’t know much Chinese yet, but you knew enough to piece together the words “forest” and “ghost”, but it means nothing to you. You tended to favor the thoughts about Sub-Zero being involved with the Triads mainly because he refused to tell you his actual name. He always said things like it was for your own good or if he told you he’d have to kill you which you were sure he was just joking about.

              None of it really bothered you that much you didn’t really care; things hadn’t been serious enough for you to worry about it. Not until recently at least, things were supposed to be casual, no strings attached, just good sex whenever he graced you with his presence. You fucked up and caught feelings though and found yourself falling hard for the cryomancer. It wasn’t entirely your fault though, he was the only man you had ever been with, ever kissed, you weren’t exactly noticed back in the states, it was practically inevitable that you would fall for him. The way he makes you feel, wanted and worthwhile was too intoxicating to resist, being with him just felt right. You aren’t stupid enough to ruin a good thing though, so you play along, you don’t pester him for his name, you don’t ask him to stay the night when you know he won’t and you certainly haven’t told him how you feel. You shiver as his teeth graze your neck brining you back to the present and he yanks your pants and panties down in one fluid motion before hoisting you up against the door easily. Whatever he was or wasn’t, he was strong.

               You feel your cheeks flush as you’re suddenly eye to eye with him, bared before his icy gaze, you tremble in anticipation as he licks his lips. He smirks, that cold, confident expression causing your hips to jerk involuntarily as he pulls his massive, dripping cock from the confines of his pants. You cry out as you feel the soft head of his cock rubbing teasingly along your dripping slit smearing pre-cum all over your glistening folds. He flashes his teeth again as his length sinks into your quivering, hot cunt in one swift movement, causing your breath to hitch as you feel his cock stretching you open, and you revel in the addictive discomfort. “S-Sub-Zero,” you start, eyes widening in realization. You try and continue but you’re so torn between the delicious sensation of the cryomancer’s dick filling your tight hole so completely and the burn and discomfort of him entering you so roughly the words escape you momentarily.

               He grunts in response as he buries himself deeper in your delicious heat, clearly not interested in your protesting, “fuck, how are you always so tight?” Sub-Zero mutters before silencing your protests with a quick, sloppy kiss before pulling away to curse softly again.

               You moan as you feel him filling you to the brim, stretching you to your limit as you’re so full you feel like you can barely breathe, you let out a shaky cry as you try and relax and adjust to the intrusion. “C-condom,” you manage to croak out, “you-you forgot.” You squeeze experimentally around his thick cock despite your dismay, immediately aware of how much colder his cock feels without the thin layer of latex to protect you. Your cheeks flush immediately as you’re suddenly very much aware of each twitch and every little pulse of the cryomancer’s long, thick cock as he works it deeper inside your dripping canal.  

               He growls as he holds himself deeply inside you, relishing in the intoxicating tightness your fluttering walls provide as your pussy enrobes his dick almost entirely. “You’re mine,” he states, upper lip curling into a slight snarl as the words make you tighten painfully around his length.

  ��            The words make your head swim with pride and pleasure. “Yes,” is all you can manage to whimper out as your fingernails bite into his muscular back as he pulls out only to slam himself inside you making you shout with delight. There’s a slight twinge of pain as your body adjusts to the harsh action, but you barely notice due to the delicious pleasure and satisfaction you feel being filled so completely by his cold length.

               “It wasn’t a question,” the cryomancer counters as he begins to fuck you, his slow but deep, controlled thrusts opening you up and making your toes curl. “You belong to me, and it’s about time you realize that I can fuck you however I want, whenever I want,” his teeth nip and bite at your tender neck as his cold cock brushes against your sweet spot with practiced precision from each nudge of his hips. He thrusts into you patiently, with deep slow strokes driving you crazy as he pulls out entirely, only to press his thick cock all the way into your velveteen heat once more.

               Your back arches against the door as you rock your hips in time with Sub-Zero’s teasing thrusts. He shifts slightly to pin your arms above your head and bends his knees slightly to thrust up into your wet heat, driving his cock even deeper inside you. “F-fuck,” you sigh shakily, your exhalation hanging in front of you in a condensed puff brought on by the cold rolling off the cryomancer’s body. You bite your lip as you feel every inch of his cock sliding in and out of your body at a lazy, maddening pace. Despite the aggressive kiss this encounter began with it was clear that Sub-Zero had calculated and complete control over the situation. You can’t help but whimper softly as he continues to thrust slowly, driving himself harder inside of you with each stroke as your walls hug and squeeze his cock.

               His arrogant expression only grows as your eyes squeeze close and your pussy flutters around his throbbing cock. He gives you no warning before switching up the pace to start pounding into your dripping cunt. “Look at what a mess you are y/n,” he pauses to lick a cold stripe along your exposed neck, “getting so worked up over me stating a simple fact.” The cold tip of his tongue sends shivers down your spine as it traces along the shell of your ear as his voice drops to a low, throaty whisper, “or maybe you can’t wait for me to use your tight little hole however I want and fill you to the brim with my seed.” The cryomancer doesn’t miss a beat, each word falling from his cold lips punctuated by sharp thrusts focused entirely on your sweet spot.

               The words hit you like a punch to your gut and your flush bright red and let out a pitiful whine as an embarrassing amount of moisture gushes from your already sopping cunt as your unexpected orgasm crashes through your body. You thrash and tremble in his hold as stars dance before your eyes, unable to silence your quiet cries as each thrust prolongs your pleasure. “Sub-Sub-Zero please,” you pant weakly as your cunt flutters and quivers around his cock and you find yourself desperate for him to make good on his word.

               “Oh?” he raises an eyebrow at your sudden orgasm before letting out a low chuckle. “What am I going to do with you? I haven’t even finished yet and already you’ve made such a mess of yourself creaming all over my pants like that,” he groans as he fucks you through your release, your want soaking through his pants as you watch him force his cock in and out of your sloppy hole. The cryomancer grips your hip tighter, continuing to piston his thick cock inside your unforgiving cunt, his icy eyes practically glowing in the dimly lit entry way.

               Your back bows as you grit your teeth in delicious discomfort as his dick pounds into your cervix, rearranging your insides to make room for his enormous length. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes as you shout loudly while the cryomancer slams into you, his thrusts quickly becoming brutal and animalistic. You finally wrap your legs tightly around his waist to have something to hold onto. Your arms begin to burn from his icy hold, but it only adds to your pleasure, “fill me up,” you whisper not entirely aware of what you’re begging for.

               “Hm? What was that?” Sub-Zero flashes you a cock-sure grin as he fucks you hard enough to make your ass smack loudly against the door.

               Heat floods your face and despite the proximity of his glacial body you feel feverish and overheated. You’re so close to cumming again you aren’t even sure what you’re saying as the words leave your lips in a jumbled mess, “please Sub-Zero, cum inside me. Mark me as your own. I-I need it! I need to feel your cum filling me up! Oh fuck! Nng! Please!” You squeal, hips thrashing wildly in his ironclad grip, as you feel that delicious heat pooling in your stomach about to bubble over as each powerful thrust of the cryomancer’s hips brings you closer and closer to completion.

               The cryomancer smiles cruelly as he stops thrusting entirely, just leaving his icy cock buried in your throbbing heat. The hand binding your wrists weaves its way into your hair as he pulls it sharply. “Keep this up and I might let you bare my heir,” he hums the words temptingly as his punishing thrusts resume. “You’d like that wouldn’t you?” his ethereal blue eyes narrow as his cold fingertips trail lightly over your flat stomach as if to accentuate the question.

               Your mind races at his words, as foolish and naïve as it sounds you had never even considered the possibility of the cryomancer knocking you up. He had always used a condom in the past, but the feeling of skin on skin magnified the sensation of his cold, velvety cock invading every inch of your pussy. The idea of him cumming raw inside your unprotected pussy made your brain short-circuit. On some baser, primal level you wanted nothing more than to be used by him, reduced to nothing more than a tool for his pleasure. You hair strains against his grip as you try to thrash your head side to side, suddenly so eager to agree to whatever he wants in the heat of the moment, needing to give him anything and everything he desired. “Ah! Sub-Zero! Please! Mark me, claim me! I need to feel you cum inside me” you beg and plead with the cryomancer as your heels dig into his back as if you were strong enough to keep him buried in your fluttering cunt if he didn’t want it.

               His deep voice rumbles your name as he bites down on your ear lobe, bucking up into your velvety pussy harder, more frantically than before, reading the telltale signs of your body. He bares his teeth at you as you clamp down around his thick length, “Kuai Liang,” he growls, his thrusts seem labored now. Your cunt is so wet, Sub-Zero has to struggle to keep his length inside your squirming body, but it was a problem he was more than happy to have.                

                 You blink back tears as he edges you closer and closer to your orgasm and you try and process what he just said, “what?”

               “My name” he groans fucking into you deeply, his balls drawn up tightly as frost creeps along your hip and his rhythm starts to falter. “You belong to me; I want to hear you scream my name as I shoot my icy load into your hot little cunt.”

               Your breath catches momentarily in your throat as your hips roll and buck in time with his thrusts. “Kuai Liang,” you whisper feeling positively giddy at the new revelation as your thighs tremble and quiver with your impending orgasm. You squeeze your eyes shut tightly as the first jolt of pleasure races up your spine. “K-Kuai Liang!” you shriek hoarsely as the cryomancer’s cock slams into your sweet spot a few more times as you tumble hard over the edge. You can see your breath hanging in the cold air as you sob his name over and over as pleasure wracks your body. Your legs tremble and jerk as your orgasm tears through your body, the intensity of it forcing you to squeeze your eyes close tightly as your small body continues to thrash against the cryomancer’s large toned one.

                 “You like how that feels huh? Can’t get enough of having my bare cock stuffed in your tight little hole, ready to burst. Tch. Shit, I’m going to pump you so full of my cum your pussy will be overflowing with my cock still inside it,” he grits out as his hips finally still and he forces his cock painfully inside the deepest recesses of your cunt as pumps his icy load inside your unprotected womb trying to keep his guttural growl contained. “G-good girl,” he practically purrs against your ear as his cock floods your waiting pussy with spurt after spurt of thick, sticky, freezing cold cum.

               You moan loud and long as you feel the thick pulses of icy cum painting your insides white. You can’t help but dig your nails frantically into his perfectly bulging biceps, needing to ground yourself as your pussy convulses around his length. The sensation of Kuai Liang cumming deep inside your trembling, over sensitive pussy, pushes you over the edge one last time. As you cum again you scream his name so loudly, you’re sure the neighbors hear your cries as your cunt tenses and your silky walls grip and massage his still twitching cock. Tears of relief stream down your face as your tight walls clamp down on his cock, determined to keep him inside you as you rock shamelessly against him a moment or two before you find yourself overwhelmed with the force of your third orgasm. Your vision blurs as jolt after jolt of pleasure shoots through your body, you can’t breathe as he reduces you to a panting mess. Your body feels boneless as you continue to cling to the cryomancer to keep yourself from blacking out entirely. You shake from exertion and the all-consuming cold as your greedy pussy milks every drop of cum from the cryomancer’s spent cock. You’re left shivering, with your teeth chattering as you feel frozen from the inside out, but the cold is as addicting as it is comforting. You crave more of it as your head lulls forward with content exhaustion, falling on the cryomancer’s shoulder as his unyielding grip on your hair finally relaxes.

                 He grins at you, looking entirely satisfied, messy hair falling into his handsome face, “you want me to order something for dinner? You’ll need to keep your strength up for round two.”

               You smile at him softly as he eases out of your aching pussy his gaze predatory and possessive as you pussy can’t contain the amount of cum the cryomancer has filled it with, He watches intently as his release trickles down your thigh as his cold, strong arms steady you. “Yeah, delivery sounds perfect, I don’t think I can walk to the night market after that, Kuai Liang,” you lower your eyes shyly, still trying to get used to his name.

               “I like the way my name sounds coming from your lips,” he smirks, running his thumb over your lower lip before easily hefting you over his shoulder and carrying you inside your home.

Original Bi-Han Version:

              You lean back in your chair, stretching your stiff arms above your head as you let out a triumphant sigh. You had just finished up grading the small mountain of tests that laid neatly stacked in the corner of your desk. The week always seemed to last a little longer when you had to grade tests, you didn’t really like giving written exams in the first place, they seem impractical to you. It was more important to you that the kids could speak the language properly rather than be able to diagram a sentence, who the hell needs to know how to diagram a sentence, you think to yourself shaking your head in annoyance. You had moved to China about ten months ago after graduating college, you hadn’t planned on being an English teacher, but you quickly jumped on the opportunity as it meant an escape from your miserable home life. The company that hired you did warn you it would be in a rural area, but conveniently left out the fact that you would be in the absolute middle of nowhere. Surrounded by a sea of endless clouds, rugged snowcapped pillars of stone that were unlike anything you had ever seen and a tiny village nestled at the base of said mountains with a slow, steady river running through it that they claimed was still in Hunan Province.

              When you first arrived, you were pretty sure you had stepped back in time, the beautiful little town looked like it was from the Ming Dynasty, it was like living out a childhood fantasy. Adjusting to life here had been difficult at first, you didn’t miss your life back in America but at the same time you didn’t speak a word of Chinese, you didn’t know a single person aside from the school’s principal and you were most certainly the first foreigner most of the village folks had ever laid eyes on which made navigating your new life a challenge to say the least. You gradually made friends with the other teachers and learned a few simple phrases to get by, but with the language barrier is was difficult and often times lonely, or it was until he showed up. There was one person you met about six or seven months ago that had turned your life upside down even more so than moving half-way across the world ever could, someone who made your cheeks feel hot just thinking about him. You smile to yourself as you think about him before hastily clipping all the tests together and dropping them into your filing cabinet as you grab your belongings and head for the door looking forward to spending the weekend relaxing.

              You make your way home from work, along the bustling stone streets, exhausted from your long week of trying to teach energetic, Chinese pre-teens English. You love your job now, and the kids are terrific most of the time, a couple of the boys still like to tease you every now and then but it had its down sides too like the long hours and tedious, repetitive grading. You slump against the railing of the rickety wooden stairway leading up the hill to your small, quaint home overlooking the gorgeous river flowing through town. From the outside it appeared ancient and picturesque, matching the landscape of the unchanged little village but the inside was updated enough that you never missed the modern comforts of your forgotten life in America. You heave a long sigh before trudging up the precarious steps, “I’ve been here nearly a year you’d think I’d be used to these by now,” you grumble to yourself before unlocking the door. You are greeted with a wall of cold as you step inside, and all your fatigue seems to melt away as a delicious shiver runs through your body. He’s here, you bite your lip as you feel your heart begin to race.

               Cold lips steal your breath away before you’re even able to get your shoes off as even colder hands grip your hair roughly. You part your lips as a startled little whimper escapes you before being swallowed by the cryomancer’s demanding lips. You can’t help but shiver and whine loudly as his cold tongue plunges into your warm mouth and his tall, muscular frame cages your small body against the front door. You stand on your tiptoes as your fingers claw and scratch at the shorn hair of his undercut before tangling themselves in the short ebony locks on top. There are never any slow, gentle kisses like the ones you’ve seen in movies with Sub-Zero, it was always all encompassing and all consuming. You feel like you’re drowning in an ice-cold sea as his incessant tongue twists and curls around your own. You gasp in slight pain and you feel the familiar heat of arousal pooling between your thighs as his sharp teeth tug your lower lip open in his haste.

               The groan he lets out when the coppery liquid hits his tongue makes your stomach tighten in the most delicious way possible. He had been gone for a few days now, off on another one of his “business trips” as he liked to call them. It was evident he had missed you from his obvious erection grinding against your clothed core. You weren’t exactly sure what he did for a living, he was very secretive and evasive about it. You had heard whispers from your coworkers and the villagers about him. Accusations anywhere from him being a member of the notorious Triads to something more ancient, more deadly, something the locals refused to talk about freely. You don’t know much Chinese yet, but you knew enough to piece together the words “forest” and “ghost”, but it means nothing to you. You tended to favor the thoughts about Sub-Zero being involved with the Triads mainly because he refused to tell you his actual name. He always said things like it was for your own good or if he told you he’d have to kill you which you were sure he was just joking about.

              None of it really bothered you that much you didn’t really care; things hadn’t been serious enough for you to worry about it. Not until recently at least, things were supposed to be casual, no strings attached, just good sex whenever he graced you with his presence. You fucked up and caught feelings though and found yourself falling hard for the cryomancer. It wasn’t entirely your fault though, he was the only man you had ever been with, ever kissed, you weren’t exactly noticed back in the states, it was practically inevitable that you would fall for him. The way he makes you feel, wanted and worthwhile was too intoxicating to resist, being with him just felt right. You aren’t stupid enough to ruin a good thing though, so you play along, you don’t pester him for his name, you don’t ask him to stay the night when you know he won’t and you certainly haven’t told him how you feel. You shiver as his teeth graze your neck bringing you back to the present and he yanks your pants and panties down in one fluid motion before hoisting you up against the door easily. Whatever he was or wasn’t, he was strong.

               You feel your cheeks flush as you’re suddenly eye to eye with him, bared before his icy gaze, you tremble in anticipation as he licks his lips. He smirks, that cold, confident expression causing your hips to jerk involuntarily as he pulls his massive, dripping cock from the confines of his pants. You cry out as you feel the soft head of his cock rubbing teasingly along your dripping slit smearing pre-cum all over your glistening folds. He flashes his teeth again as his length sinks into your quivering, hot cunt in one swift movement, causing your breath to hitch as you feel his cock stretching you open, and you revel in the addictive discomfort. “S-Sub-Zero,” you start, eyes widening in realization. You try and continue but you’re so torn between the delicious sensation of the cryomancer’s dick filling your tight hole so completely and the burn and discomfort of him entering you so roughly the words escape you momentarily.

               He grunts in response as he buries himself deeper in your delicious heat, clearly not interested in your protesting, “fuck, how are you always so tight?” Sub-Zero mutters before silencing your protests with a quick, sloppy kiss before pulling away to curse softly again.

               You moan as you feel him filling you to the brim, stretching you to your limit as you’re so full you feel like you can barely breathe, you let out a shaky cry as you try and relax and adjust to the intrusion. “C-condom,” you manage to croak out, “you-you forgot.” You squeeze experimentally around his thick cock despite your dismay, immediately aware of how much colder his cock feels without the thin layer of latex to protect you. Your cheeks flush immediately as you’re suddenly very much aware of each twitch and every little pulse of the cryomancer’s long, thick cock as he works it deeper inside your dripping canal.  

               He growls as he holds himself deeply inside you, relishing in the intoxicating tightness your fluttering walls provide as your pussy enrobes his dick almost entirely. “You’re mine,” he states, upper lip curling into a slight snarl as the words make you tighten painfully around his length.

               The words make your head swim with pride and pleasure. “Yes,” is all you can manage to whimper out as your fingernails bite into his muscular back as he pulls out only to slam himself inside you making you shout with delight. There’s a slight twinge of pain as your body adjusts to the harsh action, but you barely notice due to the delicious pleasure and satisfaction you feel being filled so completely by his cold length.

               “It wasn’t a question,” the cryomancer counters as he begins to fuck you, his slow but deep, controlled thrusts opening you up and making your toes curl. “You belong to me, and it’s about time you realize that I can fuck you however I want, whenever I want,” his teeth nip and bite at your tender neck as his cold cock brushes against your sweet spot with practiced precision from each nudge of his hips. He thrusts into you patiently, with deep slow strokes driving you crazy as he pulls out entirely, only to press his thick cock all the way into your velveteen heat once more.

               Your back arches against the door as you rock your hips in time with Sub-Zero’s teasing thrusts. He shifts slightly to pin your arms above your head and bends his knees deeply to thrust up into your wet heat, driving his cock even deeper inside you. “F-fuck,” you sigh shakily, your exhalation hanging in front of you in a condensed puff brought on by the cold rolling off the cryomancer’s body. You bite your lip as you feel every inch of his cock sliding in and out of your body at a lazy, maddening pace. Despite the aggressive kiss this encounter began with it was clear that Sub-Zero had calculated and complete control over the situation. You can’t help but whimper softly as he continues to thrust slowly, driving himself harder inside of you with each stroke as your walls hug and squeeze his cock.

               His arrogant expression only grows as your eyes squeeze close and your pussy flutters around his throbbing cock. He gives you no warning before switching up the pace to start pounding into your dripping cunt. “Look at what a mess you are y/n,” he pauses to lick a cold stripe along your exposed neck, “getting so worked up over me stating a simple fact.” The cold tip of his tongue sends shivers down your spine as it traces along the shell of your ear as his voice drops to a low, throaty whisper, “or maybe you can’t wait for me to use your tight little hole however I want and fill you to the brim with my seed.” The cryomancer doesn’t miss a beat, each word falling from his cold lips punctuated by sharp thrusts focused entirely on your sweet spot.

               The words hit you like a punch to your gut and your flush bright red and let out a pitiful whine as an embarrassing amount of moisture gushes from your already sopping cunt as your unexpected orgasm crashes through your body. You thrash and tremble in his hold as stars dance before your eyes, unable to silence your quiet cries as each thrust prolongs your pleasure. “Sub-Sub-Zero please,” you pant weakly as your cunt flutters and quivers around his cock and you find yourself desperate for him to make good on his word.

               “Oh?” he raises an eyebrow at your sudden orgasm before letting out a low chuckle. “What am I going to do with you? I haven’t even finished yet and already you’ve made such a mess of yourself creaming all over my pants like that,” he groans as he fucks you through your release, your want soaking through his pants as you watch him force his cock in and out of your sloppy hole. The cryomancer grips your hip tighter, continuing to piston his thick cock inside your unforgiving cunt, his icy eyes practically glowing in the dimly lit entry way.

               Your back bows as you grit your teeth in delicious discomfort as his dick pounds into your cervix, rearranging your insides to make room for his enormous length. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes as you shout loudly while the cryomancer slams into you, his thrusts quickly becoming brutal and animalistic. You finally wrap your legs tightly around his waist to have something to hold onto. Your arms begin to burn from his icy hold, but it only adds to your pleasure, “fill me up,” you whisper not entirely aware of what you’re begging for.

               “Hm? What was that?” Sub-Zero flashes you a cock-sure grin as he fucks you hard enough to make your ass smack loudly against the door.

               Heat floods your face and despite the proximity of his glacial body you feel feverish and overheated. You’re so close to cumming again you aren’t even sure what you’re saying as the words leave your lips in a jumbled mess, “please Sub-Zero, cum inside me. Mark me as your own. I-I need it! I need to feel your cum filling me up! Oh fuck! Nng! Please!” You squeal, hips thrashing wildly in his ironclad grip, as you feel that delicious heat pooling in your stomach about to bubble over as each powerful thrust of the cryomancer’s hips brings you closer and closer to completion.

               The cryomancer smiles cruelly as he stops thrusting entirely, just leaving his icy cock buried in your throbbing heat. The hand binding your wrists weaves its way into your hair as he pulls it sharply. “Keep this up and I might let you bare my heir,” he hums the words temptingly as his punishing thrusts resume. “You’d like that wouldn’t you?” his ethereal blue eyes narrow as his cold fingertips trail lightly over your flat stomach as if to accentuate the question.

               Your mind races at his words, as foolish and naïve as it sounds you had never even considered the possibility of the cryomancer knocking you up. He had always used a condom in the past, but the feeling of skin on skin magnified the sensation of his cold, velvety cock invading every inch of your pussy. The idea of him cumming raw inside your unprotected pussy made your brain short-circuit. On some baser, primal level you wanted nothing more than to be used by him, reduced to nothing more than a tool for his pleasure. Your hair strains against his grip as you try to thrash your head side to side, suddenly so eager to agree to whatever he wants in the heat of the moment, needing to give him anything and everything he desired. “Ah! Sub-Zero! Please! Mark me, claim me! I need to feel you cum inside me” you beg and plead with the cryomancer as your heels dig into his back as if you were strong enough to keep him buried in your fluttering cunt if he didn’t want it.

               His deep voice rumbles your name as he bites down on your ear lobe, bucking up into your velvety pussy harder, more frantically than before, reading the telltale signs of your body. He bares his teeth at you as you clamp down around his thick length, “Bi-Han,” he growls, his thrusts seem labored now. Your cunt is so wet, Sub-Zero has to struggle to keep his length inside your squirming body, but it was a problem he was more than happy to have.    

                 You blink back tears as he edges you closer and closer to your orgasm and you try and process what he just said, “what?”

               “My name” he groans fucking into you deeply, his balls drawn up tightly as frost creeps along your hip and his rhythm starts to falter. “You belong to me; I want to hear you scream my name as I shoot my icy load into your hot little cunt.”

               Your breath catches momentarily in your throat as your hips roll and buck in time with his thrusts. “Bi-Han,” you whisper feeling positively giddy at the new revelation as your thighs tremble and quiver with your impending orgasm. Your eyes flutter shut as the first jolt of pleasure races up your spine. “B-Bi-Han!” you shriek hoarsely as the cryomancer’s cock slams into your sweet spot a few more times as you tumble hard over the edge. You can see your breath hanging in the cold air as you sob his name over and over as pleasure wracks your body. Your legs tremble and jerk as your orgasm tears through your body, the intensity of it forcing you to squeeze your eyes close tightly as your small body continues to thrash against the cryomancer’s large toned one.

                 “You like how that feels huh? Can’t get enough of having my bare cock stuffed in your tight little hole, ready to burst. Tch. Tā mā de, I’m going to pump you so full of my cum your pussy will be overflowing with my cock still inside it,” he grits out as his hips finally still and he forces his cock painfully inside the deepest recesses of your cunt as pumps his icy load inside your unprotected womb trying to keep his guttural growl contained. “G-good girl,” he practically purrs against your ear as his cock floods your waiting pussy with spurt after spurt of thick, sticky, freezing cold cum.

               You moan loud and long as you feel the thick pulses of icy cum painting your insides white. You can’t help but dig your nails frantically into his perfectly bulging biceps, needing to ground yourself as your pussy convulses around his length. The sensation of Bi-Han cumming deep inside your trembling, over sensitive pussy, pushes you over the edge one last time. As you cum again you scream his name so loudly, you’re sure the neighbors hear your cries as your cunt tenses and your silky walls grip and massage his still twitching cock. Tears of relief stream down your face as your tight walls clamp down on his cock, determined to keep him inside you as you rock shamelessly against him a moment or two before you find yourself overwhelmed with the force of your third orgasm. Your vision blurs as jolt after jolt of pleasure shoots through your body, you can’t breathe as he reduces you to a panting mess. Your body feels boneless as you continue to cling to the cryomancer to keep yourself from blacking out entirely. You shake from exertion and the all-consuming cold as your greedy pussy milks every drop of cum from the cryomancer’s spent cock. You’re left shivering, with your teeth chattering as you feel frozen from the inside out, but the cold is as addicting as it is comforting. You crave more of it as your head lulls forward with content exhaustion, falling on the cryomancer’s shoulder as his unyielding grip on your hair finally relaxes.

                 He grins at you, looking entirely satisfied, messy hair falling into his handsome face, “you want me to order something for dinner? You’ll need to keep your strength up for round two.”

               You smile at him softly as he eases out of your aching pussy his gaze predatory and possessive as you pussy can’t contain the amount of cum the cryomancer has filled it with. He watches intently as his release trickles down your thigh as his cold, strong arms steady you. “Yeah, delivery sounds perfect, I don’t think I can walk to the night market after that, Bi-Han,” you lower your eyes shyly, still trying to get used to his name.

               “I like the way my name sounds coming from your lips,” he smirks, running his thumb over your lower lip before easily hefting you over his shoulder and carrying you inside your home.

[snarkwrites]

"I learned so much more just being out in the world, you know, and a little bit in jail." This quote made me laugh, and now I wonder what kind of headcanons you'd come up with on that theme. (Maybe something with Rick & Shane?) 🌻

I had so much time to think about this whilst sick, my darling sunflower anon and... This is what I came up with. No real appearances of my original character Evie here, btw, so I’m sorry in advance if you were hoping for that? Anyway... This is merely a what if... What if Shane hadn’t gone into law enforcement? What if he’d given into the dark side much much earlier?

If you’ve ever found yourself wondering that, by all means, keep reading.

Is it wrong that I’m tempted to write an AU of walking dead where like... it starts out like this? Maaybe.. But I doubt I do it, lmao.

WARNING:

Heavy on the angst. Mentions of Rick being shot, a bank robbery, several wrong choices in life made by Shane.. Possibly OOC, idk though.. ANGSTY AF.

TAGGING:

@rampagewriting - I guess maybe you’d wanna see this idk? @chasingeverybreakingwave - bc I know you like Shane so I thought maybe this would be of interest... @missjennferb - i thought you might like this idk... 

If anyone wants to be tagged, add yourself to my multifandom doc, otherwise I don’t tag.

OTHER STUFF:

[ masterlist - about - tag list doc ] 

Everyone always told them both “You’re going places, kid.” For Rick, it was surprisingly simple. The world, for whatever reason, deemed him as someone who had great things ahead in life. Rick seemed to rise above and beyond everyone’s expectations. Even those of his father, which were astronomical because the old man was nothing if not a perfectionist. A trait which was definitely passed down to Rick in spades...

-- Shane, not so much. Having a rough around the edges drunk burn out former football star for a daddy only means one thing... Either you get out of his footsteps and you do better, you go farther than the old man, or you succumb to all the pressure and the negativity the old man feeds you and you wind up crushed under it’s weight. 

-- At first, it certainly seemed as if Shane Walsh were destined for great things like Rick, his chosen ‘brother’ from another mother. All-Star on their high school’s football team, took them all the way to state two or three years on the team... But even having that damn State Championship ring wasn’t enough. The harder Shane Walsh pushed the world, the harder the world pushed back until that fateful game day senior year when Shane Walsh finally pushed too fucking hard. The end result was an injury that left his football aspirations shattered on the ground. 

-- Rick did everything he could to keep his best friend uplifted. He was at every single procedure and every single therapy session but Shane was really starting to give up. To lose any shred of hope that he ever held. As a result, he started to resent Rick’s success (and the fact that Rick was the one that their coach chose to fill Shane’s spot didn’t help matters any)... Shane’s father didn’t help either, what with the constant remarks about Shane having never been anything but trash, destined for the same life he lead.

-- Rick went on to the police academy after his own injuries put a stop to his dream of playing college ball. His father was more encouraging. Caring... Despite neither man being able to show emotions all that well. Rick knew he had the love and support of his family, this is something that Shane probably never knew the feeling of.

-- I firmly believe that if Evie were an actual character during this whole universe, she would’ve TRIED and fought like hell for Shane but ultimately, Shane would’ve pushed her away just as he did Rick. I know, I know... This is the only mention I intend of putting about Evie in here though. Anyway, yeah...

Shane goes career military. And at first, he’s fine with it. But he’s sent overseas and he’s exposed to nightmarish conditions, he’s forced to choose between his humanity or caving, giving into darkness and corruption even further. Doesn’t help that during this time, a high ranking officer takes the young man under his wing and basically turns him into a glorified killing machine, puts him into situations that will later spell disaster for the young man.

-- Shane goes awol after a mission goes wrong and he’s left with mild PTSD in the days and weeks following. 

-- I know this wouldn’t happen IRL, but.. for whatever reason, the government chooses not to pursue the rogue officer Shane Walsh. Shane goes back home to King County and he’s a changed man... Darker... More cynical.. Angrier. With time, this grows and festers to a point where Shane is now living an almost sub-human life, taunted by the lives he’s taken and seen taken in front of him. He turns to a life of crime.

This, of course, all comes to a head when Shane’s accepted into a group of known thieves. The bank heist nearly goes off without a hitch until Shane is face to face with his old pal Rick... He freezes, which is a stupid.. stupid.. thing to do. He has to choose between shooting a friend that he still very much cares about and losing that last shred of humanity or running for it, knowing Rick will find him and he will take him into custody. 

-- I say he has to choose but it turns out that he doesn’t. See, one of the guys, a guy named One Hand Fred... He makes the choice for SHane. Shoots Rick in the chest. Shane is then torn between leaving with their score and his ‘crew’ or staying to make sure Rick sees safety.

-- Shane chooses to stay. This is how Shane’s story ends, with him taking the fall for the entirety of the bank heist and being sentenced to prison. Rick knows the truth. Rick TRIES to fight for a better deal, a fairer sentence.. Doesn’t work. Rick asks for one last favor from his co-workers, and that’s that he gets to be the one who escorts Shane to prison... On the way in, the two have a long and deep conversation in which your quote comes into play. Rick asks Shane if he’s really learned anything at all about the path he’s taken in life and all Shane can do is throw up those walls again and shrug it off. “Dunno, Grimes. Ask me again in 15 to 25 years, man.”

[silver-wield]

If you don't yet have an analysis of when Cloud saves Tifa from the collapsing staircase, I'd like to hear it!

Sorry this one took awhile, Nonny, I was gonna do it yesterday, but I got super tired and then I was gonna do it earlier but I got pissed off and had to walk away from the internet before I threw my computer through a window.

So, the collapsing staircase aka the cloti hand grab. Bring it!

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be long and awesome! Because I saw things and I have suspicions!

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx

Let's mosey!

Recap time!

Let's backtrack a tiny bit first. Cloud's making his way up the pillar, had his bro moment with Biggs – damn you Square – and he's heading up to where Barret is on the top level.

Reno and Rude are in their chopper, throwing shade at Shinra while doing their jobs. I love how idgaf Reno is during this bit. Like, honey, you not even trying.

As Cloud comes into view on the staircase, Reno spots him and it's time for revenge! Nothing personal, bitch!

Ok, nothing very special here. SOLDIER!Cloud taking a look about for whatever resources he has to hand – none – and we've got Reno in the background waiting for him to get in range. (Yall also almost ended up with my gif of Nyx Ulric loool he pretty but Cloud’s prettier)

Reno's impatient. He fusses with the joy stick, drums his fingers, then puts his arms behind his head. The fact he's done this last move suggests he has no doubt he'll be gunning Cloud down sooner or later. We can see Rude keeping his eyes front – you can just catch the direction of his gaze behind the left lens of his sunglasses.

HOLY SHIT! Rude blinked! Like several times in quick succession! (gotta slow the frames down to 0.25 to catch it btw) Now, this could be nothing since Rude is very hard to read and has even smaller micro-expressions than Cloud does, but when someone blinks like that it usually means they recognise the person they're looking at. He's seen Tifa running up the stairs. I don't know why he might recognise her, aside from having a headcanon about it, but I'm telling you, I saw him do several rapid blinks when he caught sight of her, then draw Reno's attention to her. His eyes behind those sunglasses are ever so slightly wider than usual btw. It's really hard to see, but there seems to be a definite look of “I know you” about him.

Reno shooting at her might have been a mistake on Rude’s part. He could have forgotten himself in that moment of recognition and didn't mean to direct Reno to a new target. That would explain why he pulled away from the attack and made up an excuse about his hand slipping.

This makes me excited to find out if Rude knows her and what the deal is with that OG crush. My headcanon? He's a former student of Zangan too and helped get Tifa to Midgar when she was injured. She doesn't remember it since she was at death's door for most of the trip. I saw a bit saying Zangan had to use a lot of healing materia on her and she stayed in the hospital too, so it's reasonable she wouldn't recall Rude. But, we don't know for sure yet, which is why headcanon.

Still exciting though!

Cloud's heard footsteps on the stairwell, so turns to see who it is and you can just catch a glimpse of Tifa appearing through the metal slats. This is the first time Cloud spots her. The camera then pans up to the helicopter again where Reno prepares to shoot Tifa.

I don't wanna say for sure that Rude's jaw clenched here. The lighting is suspect because of the angle it strikes his face. He did something. I noticed something, but it's so utterly subtle I can't tell what. He either clenched his jaw for a brief second or his lips firmed, again for a brief second. It's probably easier to catch if you slow the frames down then don't look at Rude and rely on your peripheral vision to see it. That's how I end up replaying things a million times because I saw something and then have to spend half an hour trying to find it again lol

Reno definitely smirked, I caught that no problem.

So yeah, moving on from Rude's super micro-expressions, before Reno's even finished speaking he's pulling the helicopter away from Tifa. Like, Reno's still saying “bullets” when it happens. That's a very snap decision, especially with how fast Reno talks usually. And the entire time Reno's speaking Rude is looking at Tifa. I mean, he's expressionless – he could give Cloud lessons – but there's also emotion coming from him. I kinda feel a bit sad looking at him in this screen.  

Guess we'll get more Rude backstory in part 2!

Reno bangs his head and I always laugh at that part. Get rekt!

Cloud's all da fuq? since it's so very obvious Reno was lined up to shoot and then suddenly not. But there's no time to think about why because Tifa's still running up the stairs.

Omg I'm so good I even impress myself sometimes! Check either side of the screen. Tifa at one edge and Cloud at the other, already in motion to save her as the first bullets from Reno's miss start destroying the staircase. You could not get closer to the start of this catch!

Tifa's foot is on the second step here. That's not even a second after the last screen. Her sub isn't even fully solid that's how soon she yelled for Cloud. Going by common sense, the staircase is collapsing to her right and she needs to get up another 12 steps? In a couple of seconds? Yeah, she knew that wasn't happening. She needed him. I question how she knew he was there. She couldn't see him from where she was. Maybe she guessed the chopper was shooting at him, but it could've been anyone from Avalanche. She's not looking up the stairs, her eyes are at her feet.

I think she yelled for Cloud because that's who she wanted. Like Aerith said to follow her heart, Tifa's heart cried out for Cloud when she was in danger.

Well, if that isn't a look of surprise right there. She really didn't expect him to be right there at that moment. She was screaming for him, hoping he'd save her and there he was. Her face goes from this tense “I'm about to die” look, to this wide eyed shock that there he is, right in front of her, reaching for her. Right when she needed him most. If he wasn't there she'd have been shot and the last thing she said would've been his name. That's how important it is that she screamed for him there. It wasn't that she knew he was waiting for her. She didn't know he was there at all. She just wanted him to be the one to save her so desperately and he came through.

So I bet a lot of people have looked at this so romantically that he's reaching for her. Hell yeah in a way, but what makes it even better is when you remember you're looking at Cloud through Tifa's eyes. This is how she sees Cloud looking at her in this moment, all heroic and brave and just right there for her. That confident stance, totally out from behind any kind of cover, just waiting and reaching for her. It's funny she never calls him a hero in the game, except as a motivator at the end when he's dangling off a building, because he absolutely is pulling off the hero moment here. She called his name and he appeared to save her. It's exactly how she said during their promise.

He is taking her hand. That's his fingers wrapping around hers, while hers lay open against his palm. She is the passive party in this hold, while Cloud is the active one. She could've mutually grabbed him, but she didn't. This is him saving her. This is not an equal grab. This is Cloud grabbing Tifa. Only after his fingers close over her hand do hers do the same back.

Cloud backs up, dragging Tifa up the last of the stairs to safety, while keeping himself safe as well. There, he spins her around and puts his free hand on her back, while keeping hold of her other hand in his. He doesn't let her go at all during that move. In fact, you can also see that Tifa now has both hands on Cloud. The one he took is still holding his and she's put her other hand on his arm. She was likely very scared during that moment he saved her and she's holding onto him as an anchor to feel safe. Cloud saved her and she feels safe with him.

Cloud's expression is wary and alert, since he's focused on the danger, while Tifa's is scared. Just because she can fight, doesn't make her a fighter.

Cloud lets got of Tifa's hand so he can lean out from behind their safe spot and check on the danger, but he's left his other hand on her back. During this moment, Tifa actually leans back which would increase that contact.

Her face is quite blurred since we're focusing on Cloud in the foreground, but her expression seems to hint at a “thank god I have you” look.

Oh look, the camera refocused. Definitely a “thank god I have you” look, not to mention the tears in her eyes. She was terrified.

Also, that hand is still on her back.

But, she can't be weak in front of Cloud. She wants to prove she's his equal, that she doesn't need a hero. She just wants him. I mean, before he turns to look at her, she's staring at him like he set the stars in the sky for her.

As he takes his hand off her back and pulls out his “what the hell?” line, which is clearly him mad at her for being so reckless and almost dying on him, she gives him a brave smile and puts on her own persona as someone who can totally handle all this chaos. Scared? Tifa? Noooo.

She says “nice catch” all casual like she wasn't petrified and screaming his name less than thirty seconds ago and he is not impressed by this one bit. He's unconvinced Tifa's as blasé about this as she's acting, which is why he continues to challenge her. Which isn’t the first time he’s done it. He doesn’t let her bullshit him.

Basically, she's trying to be brave and support him, but he doesn't want her to put herself in danger because he wants to protect her. They're both trying to prove they're worthy of each other and doing stupid shit in the process.

This is actually a very good moment for them because we know Cloud pretty much does whatever Tifa wants because he wants to make her happy, but this shows he's not above arguing with her or challenging her when she's being reckless and endangering herself. He's not got her on a pedestal. She's not some unobtainable dream woman. She's real to him and he feels comfortable getting mad and showing negative emotions to her. That's why he can call her crazy without worrying it'll sour her opinion of him.

Remember, Tifa is non-confrontational by nature. She doesn't like fighting and will usually agree or let things go for the sake of an easy life. But, she disagrees with Cloud or tells him off several times throughout the game. This shows she's comfortable having confrontations with him. She's not worried about upsetting him and being rejected during a typical interaction. She worries about scaring him away when she’s unsure he’ll stay, but once he’s said he’ll stick around she relaxes and doesn’t seem as worried about him leaving her. It was only when she tried to move their relationship from friendship to more during alone at last that she worried about rejection. 

Tifa accepts Cloud's feelings, even the negative ones and deals with them in a mature way. She doesn't dismiss him or ignore how he feels. She just relates her feelings to his and points out that he's still going up the pillar, so she will too. She wants to stay by his side. Her heart led her to him. If he's going, then so is she. Her expression is earnest here. There's nothing more than what she says. She's not leaving. Nothing can change her mind.

OK WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, RUDE?! DO YOU KNOW TIFA?!

He swallowed! His mouth tensed and he swallowed! Lips pulled down. Behind those sunglasses I caught movement. There's definitely something going on with Rude here and it's something that Reno doesn't know about since he doesn't recognise Tifa and he has no idea why Rude did that.

Ok, one last quick shot of yet more unnecessary touching between Cloud and Tifa. Why is he doing that? Literally to keep her within arm's reach. She said she's not leaving, so he's gonna keep her safe no matter what. To do that, he needs to know exactly how far away from him she is. Also, he wants to touch her lol

Conclusion

Well, there was lots of good stuff hidden in there and I'm even more convinced that Rude knows Tifa after I caught some of his micro-expressions. I'm excited to see if it's true in part 2, but more so the fact that we're gonna get the Turks characters' fleshed out compared to OG. We've already learned that Reno while not giving a fuck, also actually really gives a fuck. I love him. He's such a snarky butt.

But, this was about Cloud and Tifa, not Rude.

Yeah, she literally couldn't see him at any point when she was running up that staircase. She screamed his name because that's who she wanted in that moment to appear and save her. The surprise on her face is genuine. She didn't know he was there. Cloud's in full “I must save Tifa” mode, so it's real!Cloud motivating SOLDIER!Cloud to do what he doesn't think he's capable of. They then have a lover's spat about Tifa being reckless and show the healthy disagreement side to their relationship by not screaming and shouting at each other or being sarcastic – like Cloud is with someone else. While Cloud might not like Tifa going with, he understands her need to. She's also put it in terms that he can understand, but part of him is very unhappy about it, which is why in that last shot we see him with his hand on her arm ready to protect her at a moment's notice. He's not letting her out of sight or arm's reach.

It's some damn good solid relationship building from them during a tense moment.

[chemicalarospec]

Genuinely Don’t Say Anything Interesting Here But I Like Talking So Thus I’m Posting This

okay I did like nothing productive today but have a ramble on youtube fanbases, specifically the new gen of mcyt. This was two posts and then I made it one so sorry when I repeat myself. I did edit it tho lol. But that means I also inserted more, so this is just all over the place now. 

me from the future: oh god. all over the place. wait wtf this is so long. I don’t even have much to say I just like writing the same sentence three different ways and refusing to cut any of them. I’m sorry; I don’t know how to edit; this is informal AF. (can I use three semicolons? at least one of those is wrong anyways lol.)

edit: I’m so sorry I forgot about having a “read more” last night laksjdflksjad. Also idk if I even agree with myself lmao.

it’s so funny how mcyt is like The Thing now. It’s not cool to like it anymore lol, cuz everybody does. (This is a me thing. I like being special lol. I also self-define “cool” so you should not take it to heart when I say it’s not cool.)

I mean, just thinking about the Dream SMP as something I *do* want to get into, it doesn’t feel like “our thing” -- it’s has the feel of a HUGE fandom. Seriously, I’m in the phandom, which ngl has been dead since 2018, and the fanbase for the SMP has a much different, bigger feel. Idk what i’m getting at, it feels imposing? looking at the Dream SMP fandom seems similar in scope and slightly in atmosphere to pre-2019 phandom, at least to me, and it’s actually making me grateful that I joined now and not all that time ago.

Also I brought up the “our thing” bit because of the mcr post that goes “funny how MCR seems like our little secret and the biggest thing in the world at the same time” and I kinda thought that was just how all fandoms worked? idk I was going to assert that the truth is different but I thought some more and now I’m not sure.

but yeah I like the “our little secret” feel and somehow the phandom has (re)gained that while technoblade (and the new gen of mcyt as a whole) is loosing it.

I mean, I’ve been watching Technoblade since the bedwars winstreak. He had less than a millions subs but most people I brought him up to actually did know who he was. He was big but he wasn’t *famous* -- we all knew about him and we all cared. Like the only person who knew who he was and didn’t care had a little brother(s?) that loved him (wait why is this all in past tense this is all still true). (Yes AFC this has become a callout post for you mocking techno lol.) (If you’re still reading my miNeCRaFT yOuTuBeR fAnBaSe MEta. cringe culture is dead tho; I don’t have to say it like that.) 

Anyways, I didn’t follow Technoblade’s Dream SMP streams and now I feel like I’d just be tagging along if I did get into it. (also didn’t watch SMP Earth lol.) This is because I’m a gate-keeping jerk. Or hate missing out. One of those two things. 

(awkward transition where I don’t know how to make my tangent meaningful and have to make it back to the original train of thought I violently interrupted)

As a long time Techno fan, I’m really proud of the growth he’s experiencing, but a little sad too as the community is being -- well, I don’t want to say “infiltrated,” as I don’t want to shade anyone who was simply late to the party -- perhaps diluted? overwhelmed? yeah, overwhelmed by newer fans, and becoming “unmanageable” in a sense; it feels like we’ve lost a bit of our sense of community with the influx of new fans -- no shade to any new fans! This is just the way fandoms work. When the crowd is larger, it becomes harder recognize each member as a person, even if everything else is the same. (”The death of one man is a tragedy, the death of millions is a statistic.”) (look this is how my brain works deal with it)

I just really like this small community feel, and it’s a bit daunting looking at the smp fandom. 

Also the growth Dream experienced this year is genuinely ludicrous. I mean, the wide appeal of shipping is part of it, not going to beat around that bush, but there’s just so much and I wanna read an essay from a long-time fan who saw it on why he’s got so much growth. 

I really hate to shame fans and stuff, but part of it, at least for me, is that most of these new fans probably aren’t “minecrafters” like we were. I doubt the majority of them grew up on Stampy, DanTDM, and whatever the other ones I didn’t watch were. I mean, some of this is because Child. For them, the distinction is really pre-quarantine post-quarantine i guess? Really, whether they played Minecraft or not. Again, I know it’s bad to shame fans, but apparently I’m just a terrible person and I feel like it’s more shallow or disingenuous to get into MCYT when it’s popular without already being into Minecraft. 

WAIT that’s it -- Minecraft community, as a whole, is special. It’s a LARGE umbrella of fandoms in general, but that’s the thing: they’re all more communities than fandoms -- from the casual builders to the pro parkour players to those who watched the og youtubers to those who followed the Great Potato War, there was Minecraft Culture. 

And the expanded fandom that’s sprung up around the Dream SMP and possibly Dream in general (???) is more of fandom. It feels like a fandom. People treat it like a fandom, they talk about it in fandom spaces, it is fandom, a modern fandom. Not a quaint “little” Minecraft community. 

I’m not going to say it’s because of the shipping, but... I have no data but at least I can say that it certainly creates an appeal for Fandom People as opposed to Minecraft People. And then also it’s just a fandom thing so it makes the space more fandom. 

Also I realized this is all based upon a feeling, so where did the feeling come from? I was reading in-fandom texts a lot today, and I think the storyline actually might have something to do with it. Also maybe the “talking behind their backs”? I can’t be bothered to remember what I’m comparing to what at this point but that’s definitely done in a lot of other spaces I’m in, so idk.

OH FRICK I’ve mostly been *in* the fandom spaces for real things lmao. (Read: I’m 100% making up everything at this point.) 

(awkward transition because I inserted the last two paragraphs later on)

And really, I played minecraft today for the first time in months. But it’s still with me, you know? The memories of being introduced to it, growing up with it. Going to the Nether with my cousins, my uncle’s giant survival mode cathedral. Mojang being bought by Microsoft and everybody hating it. (... me, my brother, my two friends, essentially... how did we even know??)

[I had part about the minecraft.net writers here but it was completely unrelated so it became it’s own post. I should do that more.]

(With every sentence the target audience of this post gets smaller.)

What was I saying? I’ll just wrap up. 

TL;DR: Dream SMP fandom feels like a fandom and not a Minecraft community and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, I’ve realized I prefer a community feel, which makes me grateful I joined the phandom now. Also I shouldn’t be allowed to post things past 9:00pm. 

Oh my god I’m so sorry to all my mutrals. My tired loquacious reflex has kicked in. This is essentially a dan and phil stan blog, and though I know a few of you know what I’m going on about, I’m so sorry to the rest of you. 

Well, at least *I* think I’m a fascinating person with interesting things to say hahahahha. 

This is like a diary post. Should I post this? Yeah, other people should share my thoughts lol. OH NO: Late-night Tumblr fandom ramble posts are the new social-justice tirade/generally useless blog-like Goodreads reviews. At least it’s what Tumblr’s made for :P. 

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

BTS as FWB

Maknae Line

Warnings: smut, angst, fluff, alcohol tw

Word Count: 2,585

Taehyung (V)

Look, in his mind you're his gf he doesn't understand fwb

He likes you so much and when you suggest an arrangement he's stoked but really he just thinks you're dating

You are definitely the one who's afraid of commitment this boy would marry you in a month if you were down

So many pet names: baby, honey, Jagiya, beautiful, darling you wonder if he knows your actual name

Confused puppy "I can't text you so much? But we have a thing."

"Not a serious thing."

Pouty boi

Sweet in bed, generous lover, will eat you out for HOURS if you'd let him (you find out real quick about his oral fixation)

You absolutely know he will freak if he knows you're seeing someone else

He takes it a lot better than you thought

He's just kinda quiet, nodding

"You can see other people too, you know."

"Sure, sure." He waves you off.

He's not usually the jealous type but since things are certain between you he is salty

Oh boy the first time you have sex after he finds out

IT'S ON

Rough, pulling your hair, dirty talk in his deep ass voice, marks all over your neck, chest, thighs

You: shook. Your panties: flooded

A little cocky afterward when your legs are still shaking he leaves, which is way unusual he usually stays to cuddle

He's only obviously mad about it if he finds out you're going on actual dates with some guy

Gets STUPID drunk with his friends

They definitely text you to warn you he's feeling some type of way

Crying on your voicemail at 2am

Ubers to your house

"Is he here?" Looking around your place suspiciously

So sloppy drunk omg

Like falling down drunk you gotta all but carry his heavy ass to the bed

You can't help but stroke his hair after he pukes in your wastebasket he's so pitiful

Babbles incoherently about how amazing you are

"You know I'm in love with you, right?"

Will literally break your heart by being the sweetest boy alive

When you wake up the next morning though he's goneBarely responds to your texts

Starts calling you y/n instead of pet names so you know he's pissed

Says petty shit like "Aren't you busy with your bf?" When you ask to hang out

Turns on a dime bc he feels pathetic for liking you so much when you obviously don't care. His pride is hurt

Definitely tries to make you jealous when you end up at a mutual party

All over this girl, making out with her in the kitchen

You act unaffected (you are not)

You end up drunk af and dirty dancing with Hobi when Tae snatches your arm and hauls you to an empty bedroom

Passionate kissing, he's trying to show you what you're missing

He's still mad but he's drunk enough to be honest

"Why him? Why won't you date me? You know how I feel about you."

You tell him you're scared, girls are all over him just look at that bitch from earlier

"I only did that because you broke my heart, Jagi."

When you finally tell him you love him too he is the happiest boy

Boxy smile for days

Will propose to you after three months max

Jimin

He doesn't know you that well when you suggest an arrangement but you're hot and nice and he's a busy man so he's all for it

He falls in love with you about 30 seconds after you start hanging out regularly

He's ALL talk, when you finally get him alone in your bed he's shy, blushing when you touch him

Takes him a while to get comfortable with you but oh man when he does

Also a switch look he's the switchiest switch to ever switch next to Hobi

You get whiplash bc one minute he's begging you in whiny moans to let him inside you and the next minute you're begging him to let you come

Such a tease, oh my God

Foreplay for HOURS

Will just ever so lightly run his fingers up and down your legs while you're doing Netflix and chill

Stops just when you get worked up giving you a sheepish grin

Mostly teases you until you jump his bones

But gets so whiny when you do it to him (he loves it)

You walk around in booty shorts and no bra but won't let him touch you and he's SALIVATING

He is always touching you, in private or public he lives for skinship

It makes him shiver when you reciprocate though, just a hand in the hair at the nape of his neck and he's hard

You love doing that to him when you're out to lunch or watching Game of Thrones with the boys and he gives you such an evil eye

Y'all fucking everywhere, all the time

Once he gets comfortable with you this boy will not stop

You have very little time for anything else when he's not physically there he's sending you sexts and pics of his abs

Brags about you to literally everyone, his friends, his mom, strangers on the street

He will literally put "it's complicated" on his FB relationship status

BTW you're all over his social media everybody knows what's up

tons of pictures together

His phone background is a selfie of him kissing you

Begs for nudes on the daily until you send him a bunch while he's at dance practice and he opens it when Tae is standing behind him, getting a free show

Jimin is big mad when Tae lets out a low wolf whistle

Will definitely not so playfully wrestle him to the ground if he keeps it up

Never asks you for nudes again but saves the ones you send to use when youre unavailable

Is the happiest boy ever when you call him a pet name like "Jiminie" or "baby"

Huge flirt when he's drunk but always makes his way back to you

God help you if you show even the slightest bit of attention to another guy (guy, girl, pet, houseplant) when he's around

The poutiest jealous baby in the world

He's had feelings since day one and everyone knows but he's too insecure to actually say it

When you blow him off to hang out with another guy he's a MESS, similar to Tae

He is literally crying in the club when the guys take him out to cheer him up

One drop of alcohol and he drunk dials and texts you but this time it's bad

His friends have to physically take his phone bc you're not answering and he's getting more and more drunk

When you finally call back after you get home a very exasperated Namjoon all but carries Jimin to your apartment. "You did this. He's your problem now."

Namjoon doesn't like you much already bc he knows how Jimin feels about you and he's d o n e

Jimin almost knocks you to the ground throwing his arms around you, smelling like a bottle of tequila, sloppy kisses

"Jimin what the fuck-"

"I missed you, baby. Where you been?"

"Jimin I told you I was hanging out with Chanyeol-"

Suddenly his drunk ass remembers why he's such a mess

He's not even mad at first this insecure baby just asks you ten million questions

He'll start casual but he's fucked up so it isn't long before the questions turn

"Did you have fun?"

"Sure, we-"

"Is he better looking than me? Did he fuck you better? Is he bigger than me? Why won't you answer me?"

You have to force him to the bedroom and then he refuses to get on the bed

"I'm not sleeping where you fucked someone else."

"Oh my GOD, Jimin, I didn't-"

"You didn't fuck him?"

"Not here, I didn't!" You're exasperated by this point he is being so difficult

But then you see his pouty bottom lip trembling

"Jimin, are you crying?"

Well if he wasn't before he is now (we all know this soft baby boy)

You end up holding him all night thinking that when he wakes up he'll calm down and be embarrassed you are no stranger to crying while you were fucked up

Jokes on you he's still crying when you wake up the next morning, clinging to you like a koala bear

"I know I'm not enough for you baby but I can't take it when you're out with other guys!"

You spend an hour praising him and telling him he's definitely enough and he preens like a goddamn cockatoo (this boy's praise kink is a mile wide we all know)

You tell him how good he is and he fucks you into next week before he's clinging to you all over again

"Tell me you won't do that again, baby. Tell me you're only mine."

You give in bc he's so fucking adorable and tell him you'll think about it

He's persistent af

Every morning you crack open one eye and read "how about now?" from his needy ass

You finally text back "FINE" after three days

He shows up at your door with flowers and a big grin

He's cute or whatever

Maybe you're in love

Jungkook

You really have to talk him into this arrangement

You had hooked up with him at a party after you'd been friends for a couple of weeks and you may or may not have been thirsty

But he's hesitant

"This shit never works out well. Someone always gets hurt."

You're all whiny like "I'm a big girl I won't catch feelings get over yourself."

He just tucks his tongue into his cheek bc he's not worried about YOU catching feelings

Low-key a soft boi

You basically just sext him and send him nudes to appeal to his hormones and it works

About a week after you talked about it he comes to your place after the club

At first you only fuck when he's been drinking it's a guarantee that you're getting the D when he's had a drop of alcohol

I've said this once and I'll say it again put it on my gravestone

Jeon Jungkook is NOT A DOM

He's not a sub either but he is not having a daddy kink you'll have to find that shit in porn ok

At first even when he's shitfaced he's hesitant with you, asking permission before he touches you

Good Lord this boy loves getting head

Seeing you on your knees is his ultimate weakness

And he will ALWAYS reciprocate

And fuck you right after bc he's up again in ten minutes

Look I know I said he's not a Dom but he loves the way you look with come on your face

You've never had a guy be so fucking sweet to you right after saying the dirtiest shit

He'll bring you a towel and wash your hair if he's missed the aim

He hasn't been with many girls and nobody long term

So after a few weeks he learns your body and he will fuck you everywhere

On the kitchen table

Bent over the couch

Once in the elevator of your apartment

He gets so hard when you tease him and won't let him touch you it's ridiculous

He ain't too proud to beg, that's for sure

Low-key loves to cuddle but won't initiate it

Is not shy about asking for sex will be like "Wanna fuck?" after you get done eating burritos or something

He doesn't stay the night until after one night when you both were really drunk after the club and he was too hungover to leave

You took care of him and bought him greasy food and watched him play Overwatch

He kept meaning to leave but you were so sweet and cute

Next thing he knows you're riding him on your bed and it's really during sex that he realizes he's fucked, in more ways than one

You flip your hair back and brace your hands on his chest and you just look so beautiful and he's like oh no

He leaves right after but you shrug it off since he's been so hungover

But then he's shady and rarely texts you for a couple weeks

You're starting to think he's found a girl he likes bc he's been out a lot according to his friends

He's partying his troubles away

He does NOT want to tell you he's caught feelings especially since you had to literally talk him into this

And the more he's around you the more he wants to cuff you so he avoids you and fucks around, trying not to compare every girl to you

You're the first girl he's been with more than a handful of times and he is Jungshook at the possibility that he's fallen in love

He's a dick to his friends, snapping at them about nothing bc he misses you

"God, just call her already." Jimin fumes after he bites his head off for leaving dishes in the sink.

Jungkook shakes his head.

"I saw her out with her friends the other night, you know."

Jungkook sets his jaw but otherwise doesn't react

"Ok, but she's too hot to wait forever."

Jungkook shrugs but he starts going to bars you might frequent, telling himself he wasn't looking for you

You do start going out with other guys, since the arrangement seems over and you were never exclusive anyway

You're making out with a guy after a wild night with your girlfriends and while he's kissing your neck you see Jungkook over his shoulder, staring at you, beer in hand

He. Looks. Livid.

You shrug it off as male ego and end up taking the guy home

When you look at your phone after an hour or so Jungkook is blowing you the fuck up

First it's casual "hey it's been a while wyd"

"who's the nerd?"

"u up?"

"let me come over"

You know he's still drinking when at 5am he texts you "wake up I miss you"

He shows up looking a whole mess just as the guy is leaving

He smells like a brewery and he's got lipstick stains on his collar

You smirk at him

"Missed me, huh?"

"Maybe."

He sees the guy leaving and suddenly he has absolute murder in his eyes, literally cracking his knuckles

The poor guy fucking books it without even getting your number

"So," he says, leaning against your doorjamb as if trying to look sexy (he does) but you figure he just really can't stand up straight (also true)

"So?"

"Did you fuck that loser?" He's got his tongue working his cheek again.

"Oh, so now you're talking to me again and that's the first thing you ask? You jealous, Kookie?"

He grabs you suddenly and pulls you into his arms and now he's not trying to be tough anymore

He kisses your shoulder

"Yeah, I'm jealous."

"Why?"

He pulls away and kisses you real sweet

"Maybe I like you."

"Yeah?" You need more than that.

"A little."

"Uh huh. Well he said he liked me a lot so maybe I'll call him-"

He grabs you around the waist and kisses you harder this time

"Don't you dare," he growls.

He puts his forehead to yours.

"Maybe I love you."

"Why didn't you just say that? Maybe I love you too, dork."

Sweetest bunny smile

Jungkook is the world's best boyfriend, don't @me

[shesawriter39049]

|OUR GIRL |M|PT 6 |

(BTW I JUST ADORE THIS GIF..BUT PHYSICALLY THE BOYS LOOKS HOW THEY DO NOW..LONG SHAGGY HAIR..TAN SKIN..A WHOLE ASS THIRST TRAP) 

VHOPE X OC (Taehyung x OC/ HOSEOK X OC) 

***YOUR BOYS FINALLY PUT THAT SPARE KEY TO USE AND SURPRISE YOU WHILE THERE ON BREAK***

AN ESTABLISHED FWB SITUATION…..

IDOL BTS X FAN-ISH OC 

 PURE SMUT NO PLOT...your boys are both whipped AF

Hoseok’s a whole daddy....(The kink itself is light but the traits are strong AF) 

Tae’s your baby boy...more so because he’s the youngest of the threesum

Switch Tae...typically the OC is also a switch but she’s kinda being a sub tonight..she’s feelin a little needy! 

2.5K

Also Tae’s a little snitch lol ...

WARNINGS: Dirty talk, light spit play, light cum play, teasing, a slight pain/choking kink,oral (F receiving) light daddy kink, soft dom Hoseok, mentions of bondage, drawn out foreplay if you will….

Very light MxM they kiss towards the end...but I mean it’s clear this FWB situation goes in both directions! 

“Babyyy” Cooed past his lips, brushing against the side of your neck, you could literally feel the need in his voice. Faint airy kisses being painted along your skin had your eyes fluttering open, vision still hazy amongst the darkness. To be fair you felt the bed shift..you also felt hands roaming down your body, but you knew who it was..you knew his touch! 

Yet you didn't wake up right away...to be honest you thought you were dreaming, considering it’s been damn near 3 months since you've seen your boys. Your dreams had become very ...Vivid will say.. Sucking on the sweetpost at the base of your neck, grinding his hips against your own, the only barrier between the two of you was the rough fabric of his jeans. The warmth from his skin flush against your own “Taee…” his name fell you your lips in nothing more than a moan, you were already panting and he barely touched you, nuzzling your nose into his hair, needing to take in his natural scent! 

Nothing but the humm of the fan buzzing through your ears,kissing his way down your body, until he was buried between your thighs. Placing soft languid kisses against your clit before sucking it between his lips . Every flick of the tongue damn near had you running up the bed you were so sensitive, it’s been way too long since someone besides yourself has made you come.

“Hi baby….”No matter how dark it was you could see the smirk on his face clear as day, lips moving over to nuzzle against your thigh. Leaving open mouth kisses against your flesh, sucking the sensitive skin between his teeth. Letting his tongue take a lap around your bikini line until you were practically throbbing for him to come back to your core. You could feel yourself starting to clench around NOTHING just because you needed some sort of stimulation...

Laying a couple kitten licks against the hood of your clit, body jolting at every end , Instinctively your hands roamed down your stomach and nestled into his hair,letting them get lost in the long wavy mane that’s formed along his scalp. “Tae, babyyy” This time when the words fell from your lips it was desperate,frantic, needy. There was just something about feeling his hair tickle your thighs as he unraveled you nerve by nerve that made this seem...real! Suddenly you needed so much, nothing felt like enough, you needed to feel his man every damn were because it’s felt like years since you’ve had him! Your entire body was tingling as your heart thumped rapidly in your chest. 

Caressing his cheek in your hand, stroking it fondly, loving how soft, and warm he felt! “Missed you” vibrated against your folds as he dove back in, not wasting any time giving you everything you needed and then some! Tongue taking its time to explore every niche within your folds as if it was his first time tasting you. Allowing himself to get reacquainted with your body all over again, deep breathy moans zipped through every nerve in your body as he tasted you. “Hmm, your soo good baby, you taste so fuckin good…” 

“Tae-fuck…” Your were already so gone , mind in a haze, as your nails alternated between his back and his scalp, stroking every inch of skin you could reach . Almost as if you thought if you let go you’d wake up and realize this was all just a dream!

No matter how immersed you were it didn't take you long to snap out of it upon realizing someone was missing. Propping yourself up on your elbows,  stroking his hair out of his face “T-Tae, wheres-” Neck rolling back on your shoulders as your muscles tightened, thighs shaking, as he sucked your clit between his lips, at a relentless pace. Grazing the budd between his teeth, eliciting  just the right amount of pain! Clearly he had no intentions of letting up until you came all over his face. “Go easy on me baby-fuckkk-...” The last syllable hanging off your tongue for longer than you intended. The grip you held on his hair only got tighter as your body jerked and seized under his hold. Completely ignoring your cries and pleads, only making him dig his nails even deeper into your thighs so you couldn’t wiggle away!You could feel him smiling against your heat, as you panted out desperately just needed a moment….shit!

“I’m right here...be a good girl for Tae baby….”Fuck, there he was, you could feel the control in his voice,in true Jung Hosoek fashion, it was never a question..always a statment. Frame resting against the door, strolling in your direction far to slow for your liking. “Let baby boy have his fun...all he could talk about was how bad he needed to taste you..let Tae make you come baby…..let him give you what you need” The emphines on the word “Need” set every nerve on your body ablaze in combination with the pure lust the rolled off his tongue, as he oh so calmly told you what to do. 

“Your looking at me like you wanna fuck the shit outta me…”  Hoseok  breathed out with an airy chuckle discarding his shirt in the process, pulling it over his head in one clean sweep.  You couldn't take your eyes off of him if you wanted too, thankful they’d adjusted to the pure darkness that surrounded the three of you. 

“Fuck, I do, I just wanna touch you..c’mere…” lacking all patience as you tugged on his pants, earning an arrogant chuckle that you couldn't even be mad about because you needed him.

Hands soothing up the youngers back slowly, letting his fingers met yours as they got tangled in his hair. “Did you miss it baby?Miss how good daddy’s cock fills you up? ” The implied question was more than rhetorical as he cupped the outline of his length, stroking himself until the imprint of his dick was engraved into his sweats! Grabbing your hand, replacing it with his as you worked him, his length was hard enough for you to fully be able to grip him even though the gabric. Thumb pressed firm against his tip, the slight wetness let your know he was already dripping. 

His eyes were burning into your own as he started grinding his hips into our palm, soft grunts, and moans lipped past his lips as he laid his hand over yours. Guiding your movements slightly, head lulling on his shoulder as you added pressure to the base..almsot enough to make it hurt..but Hoseok liked pain...at least when it cam to sex. “Fuck yes...just like that...harder baby...you know what  I need…...” Not hesitating to give him what he wanted,  it was so easy to become addicted to the sounds that slipped past Hoseok's lips.

He hasn't touched you yet and you craved it..you were aching for it actually arching up into nothing hoping he’d take the hint “Hoseokkkk” Whined from your lips and the smile that tugged on his cheeks let you know this little shit already knew what you wanted…

“Hmm?” Cocking his head to the side slightly, tongue grazing along his bottom lip “ What do you need baby?” 

Gripping his hand, bring it over to take a firm grip on your breast, squeezing yours over his own as you held his hand in place so there was NO room for debate. “Fucking touch me!” 

“Wanna try that again?” Still not a question..a command…you were pouting but he could give less than a damn

“Please...daddy please...I need you to touch meee” You were already falling apart considering what was going on between your thighs. All of these taunting, painfully teasing strokes of the tongue that Taehyun kept swiping along your heat! Far needier than usual but you were too far gone to care! Slowly sliding his hand up your chest, taking a firm grip around your neck, pulling a sharp breath from your lungs as you arched up slightly. Giving him more access...leaning down so his lips could hover over yours tugging your bottom lip between his teeth, sucking it between his own. Mouth gaping open at a particularly deep stroke of the tongue from Taehyung, eyes fluttering to the back of your head. “Tae-fuckkkk” 

“God your so fucking sexy….you gonna come? Hmm is baby boy gonna make you come?”

Excepting a breathy whine as a response before llicking his way into your mouth, only tightening the hold he had around your neck in the process, bringing his opposite hand down your stomach. Damn near growling at the way your muscles tensed beneath him, loving how easily he got to you now, an amused smirk tugged on his lips as he pulled back bringing his fingers over to your mouth. Not hesitating to lap your tongue around the digits, sucking them back with a moan. Making sure to take him knuckle deep, eyes locked with his as his fingers disappeared between your lips. The feeling of Hosoek’s  dick twitching in his pants at every flick of your tongue, had you moaning even louder. Teeth sinking into his bottom lip, as his eyes fluttered down at you  “Our girls such a little cock tease…Tae” Massaging the youngers neck as he rolled it against your core. You could hear a hint of frustration laced within the moan that crept past his throat, he needed to be inside you so damn bad! 

 Freeing himself from your hold bringing his fingers down to twist and flick at your nipples...making sure they were nice and wet thanks to your tongue. Leaning down to blow against the already overly sensitive buds making your entire body shudder around them. “ Your not the only one who can tease baby…” Hoseok looked like...a whole damn problem,wearing nothing but a pair of sweats that were sitting unnecessarily low,no underwear in site!  A couple thin chains dangling from his neck, while his gold AP dusted his wrist, hair still long and wavy, falling in his face slightly….

“Hyunggg” Whined from Taehyung’s lips and vibrated against your clit and you already knew you were in trouble. He’s slapped your thigh at least 5 times as you kept trying to lock them around his head. 

A hum leaving his lips as he observed the two of you, positioning himself behind you so your back was resting against his chest. Stroking his hand up and down the youngers spine gently, bringing it up to cradle the hair at the nape of his neck “I thought daddy told you to be a good girl for Tae….” Teeth sinking into the base of your neck until you damn near screamed. Hands coming down to spread your legs apart, placing them on either side of his thighs, thumbs digging into your flesh they’d without a doubt leave bruises. “Is that betterTae?” You could already hear the smirk in his voice as his eyes fluttered down in Taehyung’s direction who only offered a low moan in response.

Nudging your cheek with his nose until you looked at him, ghosting his lips over yours until you were chasing after them, it’s been too long since you've tasted him!  Mouth gaping open from how  consumed you were from Taehyung, with this new angel he had full exposure to everything! Ficking at the roof of your mouth with his tongue..easing his way past your lips. Reclining your neck on his shoulder so he could deepen the kiss, sucking your tongue against his own, swallowing every moan that escaped your lips while his fingers kneaded at your inner thighs! Yours moving up to get tangled in his hair….

 “Fuck you don’t know how long ive been waiting to do this...how many times I thought about this while I got myself off….I missed you so.damn.much” Everything pourded out in a slurr of moans, hearing Hoseok sound this...needy had you almost pliant on top of him!  Between that, and what’s  going on between your thighs you felt like you could pass out already! 

Neck reclining against Hoseok’s shoulder as you broke away from the kiss, feeling almost as though you couldn't breathe your chest was getting so tight.  Taehyung sucked harder and harder, pulling back slightly, the lack of stimulation had your eyes fluttering down to meet his. Teasingly letting his tongue roll from his jaw, leaving long, slow drags against your pussy, licking from top to bottom. Flicking at your entrance with the wet muscle before pursing his lips to blow over every surface he just thoroughly licked. The sensation had you trying to run away no matter how restaried you were, earning a smack against your clit from the younger.

“You move one more time and I’m tying you to this damn bed!Try me!” Hissed into your ear as he nipped at the side of your jaw.  A whine leaving your lips in response, as you felt one of his hands leave your thigh..disappearing between them instead…  In attempts to Join Taehyung. Once the younger felt Hoseok’s fingers tease down your folds he pulled back, flicking the tips of his fingers with his tongue. “Taehyung” Slipped past his lips in a combination of a growl and a moan as the younger teased Hoseok’s fingers between his pouty lips before retreating back to your clit.Going three strong, in one motion,filling you knuckle deep. “Goddammit Y/N” He almost sounds winded, as if he could already feel you around his length just from how tight you are around his fingers! 

“Fuckk- fuck-fuck-” all it took was a Hoseok joing Tae for your body to compeltely collapse on itself, you almsot screamed from the amount of pressure pooling at the pit of your stomach. Your release came crashing into your body at hyper speed and everything went  dark! Pumping his fingers in and out at a relentless pace the sound of your juices sloshing in and out as he worked you open. Nails dug into Taehyung's back, you probably broke skin at some point. Hoseok’s free had coming up to grip your hair, yanking your head back on his shoulders, Forcing you to gaze up at him with heavy lids, as your entire body started shaking, thighs instinctively attempting to close around Taehyung’s head.You felt his nails dig into your thighs as he pried them apart, taking back full control. 

“Yes...fuck yes…” Moaned from his lips as he dropped his foreaded to yours, sucking your tongue back into his mouth as you came..hard. A silent cry ripped from your throat while your walls almost violently contracted around his fingers, milking them for everything he had. “That’s it, come baby, fuck..your pussys soo fucking wet” slowing his fingers immensely as your body jerked on his lap nails clawing at his scalp as whimpered against his tongue. “God, you look so damn good when you come” His fingers took deep slow strokes, as the maneuvered in and out, you could feel how rock hard he was against your back, mouth already watering no matter how exhausted you already were!  Sliding his fingers up your lips  spreading them slightly Tae continued his attack on your clit, purposely licking Hoseok's fingers in the process. 

Hoseok eased up first flicking his tongue around his fingers sucking them clean, the sight of that alone had you ready to come all over again! “Oh god please, please I can’t...Tae baby...fuck it’s too much…”  Voice horse, chest raising and crashing against itself! You found yourself pulling at Taehyung’s head thankful neither of the two seemed to try and stop you. 

Chin glistening, while the smuggest smirk imaginable spread across his face, trickling his fingers up your folds. “Taste yourself princess…” an exasperated chuckle left your lips before sucking his fingers between your lips, pulling back to grip his jaw between your palms. 

“Did I taste good?” 

“Always...” Brushed against his lips as snaked your way into his mouth, finally getting to kiss him... deep, somewhat sloppy actually but you both loved the feeling of your tongues getting tangled together. There was always a tight for control, tonight he let you have it, moaning at the taste of yourself along his tongue. Sucking his bottom lip into your mouth “Take these fucking pants off and fuck me ….now…” A whiney tigne hit Taehyung throat as he pulled back. Eyes flickering up to his hyung, who grabbed his face, efforeslly parting the seams of Taehyung’s lips with his tounge,needing to taste you again “Fuck her good Tae, you already know how our baby likes it...give her what she wants…”  

You could see the two of them smirking into the kiss which let you know you were in for a long fucking night  “MmmHmm...slow, deep, so fucking deep until she can’t take it anymore…” Brushed past Taehyung tongue and onto Hoseok’s,the grip he held on the youngers jaw got tighter, more possessive if you will as he deepened the kiss. 

“Fuck yes,until her thighs are shaking…. and she’s trying to squirm away-” Breaking away from the kiss to let his eyes flutter over in your direction. “You think you can be a good girl for Tae this time baby or should I just tie you to the bed before we even get started?” 

Completely thrown off by the question to be honest your mind was still hazy from watching the little show the two of them just put on. Clearly the lack of response was a response in Hoseok’s eyes “Hmm..go get my bag for me baby…” Eyes flickering in the youngers direction who just offered a smirk before crawling of the bed… 

Yup...you were fucked literally and figuratively..luckily for you..you had a long weekend……

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THAT’S ALL SHE WROTE! YEAH IDK WHERE THIS CAME FROM! LOL BUT I HADN'T WRITTEN IN A COUPLE DAYS AND THIS JUST POURED OUT!

IF YOU LIKED IT “LIKE IT” COME LEMME KNOW...AND I will continue doing these whenever I feel inspired to do sooo…

P.S...I think if I do another one..I’ll actually finally add some backstory so you guys know how this all came about… 

Everytime I do these I mention that they only see each other once every 2-3 months...so I  feel like this “situation” is going on close to a year now....

Love you as always,

Rocki

[longinglook]

I’m answering a bunch of asks about this episode under a read more to avoid spoilers/spamming everyone’s dash with a ton of posts, so if you’ve sent me an ask and I haven’t answered it yet, it’s probably down here!!!!

angry fighter looks hot af but at what cost 😔

they could have kept it. i’m ready to give up angry fighter and naked showering fighter if they take back what they did

not at how i'm more invested in fighter and tutor's relationship than my own but to be fair me and my boyfriend have been together for like 6 years lol and thankfully we know how to communicate

goals omg... where do i get a long lasting relationship with someone who can communicate and is okay with me caring more about a fictional couple than anything else please tell me your secrets

"i don't love you anymore" hurt us more please

I felt so numb at that point I didn’t even register the pain... 

The LineTV version will be worse but we saw how it will end so I can finally breathe a sigh of relief I knew Tutor would push him away at least they got that right and his response hurts so much but after what Fighter did in that scene it makes sense "If you ask me rn I don't love you anymore"

Yup the linetv version was indeed worse. I found it interesting how Fighter stopped because of Tutor’s words and not because he was pushed away. Apart from the whole bed scene which I hated and I will talk about it more in a different post, I also disliked A LOT how Fighter doesn’t apologize. He cries sure, but he’s crying about the breakup, he doesn’t seem to regret or realize how bad what he just did is.

tutor gave him the necklace back but he still has the nametag and string maybe it was a mistake to watch the episode after all

honestly nothing of this episode made sense from a narrative standpoint

electric chair for fight's dad i don't even care at this point just k word him

agreed, it’s all his fault he deserves to rot but also make sure he hasn’t disowned Fighter yet before he d words

Right, I'm sitting down with a large, very strong margarita (which my girlfriend made me, rolling her eyes and saying "what the hell is it with you and these Thai boys"?) and opening the LineTV subbed link. See you on the other side!!

[adele voice] hello from the other side! I wish I had alcohol or a girlfriend to keep me company thoughout this mess

now that deleted scene makes more sense, it explains a bit more why fighter would completely lose it when tutor uses that kid to make him jealous. tutor's plan and the whole scene following it was bullshit but series add some random shit for drama all the time so why am i even surprised. at least he stopped, they talked and tutor told him off. still don't get why it was necessary. him just breaking down in front of tutor would have been enough.

IT WAS COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY!!!!!!!! THIS IS WHAT MAKES ME MAD THE MOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS CLEARLY JUST AN EXCUSE TO CREATE MORE DRAMA IN A CHEAP TASTELESS WAY! oh my god you guys I am so upset, I will write more in another post but. I can’t believe they thought this would be a good idea. It completely ruined the rest of the episode for me. The conversation they have right after could have worked just fine without the ab*se, it was a good conversation, Fighter telling Tutor that he has liked him since day one, that it took him a lot to take down his walls and come to terms with his feelings. ALL THAT SHIT BEFORE WAS NOT NECESSARY. NOT GOOD. 

let's be real zee deserves a fuckin' oscar for his performance in the last episodes and todays saint too i was crying like a baby

zee was incredible. last week saint was mvp for me, but this week zee was insane. the scene with his father was so well done. I dodn’t cry because I was extremely upset, and still am, and I didn’t enjoy the episode at all. But I can recognize the amazing performances that Saint and Zee gave us today

the author said she talked to the director and he wants to re-shoot many scenes because he want to emphasize on more pain for both couples??? sir i think we had enough pain thank you very much

the only thing that I want them to shoot is a fucking apology video for thinking this was a good idea

fighter telling his father he sucks at love and that his wife literally ran away from him to be with another man made my day lol like why are you trying to judge someone's else love life when you suck at your own dude

that was amazing! while I was watching the unsubbed broadcast I was praying he’d come out or use the word gay. This wasn’t exactly it, but it still was a very very good conversation that I would have enjoyed more if part 1 hadn’t happened.

zee's acting was so good but i still hate they took that route for fighter like i'm super glad it wasn't romanticized and tutor did kiss him back at some point but that scene could have had the same impact if they just talked istg

yup! zee you’re doing amazing sweetie i’m sure it’s not your fault they made fighter do this. the scene was so incredibly pointless. no words

I know many people are talking about Part 1 as they should for obvious reasons but let's also talk about Part 2 because that was FighterTutor I know and love. Plus Saint was acting so cute like a cat it was adorable and all the little touches between them I just want them to be happy.

I... hated that scene I’m so sorry to disappoint. It felt so out of place after part 1, it made zero sense to have Tutor act that way after what he had said to Fighter and what had just happened. I’ve noticed that fevers tend to be used a lot in bls to show the sick character that this other person is sweet and caring and it’s just so out of the blue and a clear plot device to get Tutor to rethink... It honestly was so unnecessary considering that Zon talks to him after and I’d like to believe that’s what convinces Tutor to maybe fight some more for his happiness. Idk I found the whole chest rub insanely uncomfortable after everything that happened, Tutor was sick and feverish, idk. Also the joke at the start of that scene about Fighter taking advantage of him was AWFUL. WHAT THE FUCK.

no you are right the part with zon was kinda weirdly translated plus the whole text conversation which fighter was reading on part 2 (or was part 3?) isn't translated

the texts say something along the lines of “How are you? I saw you were very sick. I thought about P’Fight’s father. Can I suggest something? I say talk to Fight about his father. There should be a better soultion” (provided by google translate)

fighter reminds me of that one friend i had in college he would just suddenly disappear for days and then come back just to disappear again

I was that friend in college... you can’t just be emotionally available all the time, sometimes you gotta bounce

whyru season 2 with dew and his boyfriend but this time dew will run off all the time leaving fighter on his own

I agree with this