#how can someone spout shit without reading basic theory

[anonymouswarriorhumanist]

That is the greatest BULLSHIT someone has ever spouted about Marxism without reading even a page of Das Kapital.

Marxism doesn't aim at making things free for people. It aims that abolishing the factory system altogether that arose as a part of capitalism in around the Industrial Revolution. The factor system deprives the worker of their species being, alienates them from the product they make and from each other.

And who benefits?

The capitalist factory owner pig who starves the workers and deprives them of a living if they don't work for 27 hours in a day.

And that point abt being managers and not builders, like what drugs r u on? Marxism does aim at building a stateless society wherein the government's oppressive control is negated and people can live the fricking life they want without slaving for others. But ofc, some people don't read so why would they get it lol.

Also totalitarian states can never be communist as a communist society legit focuses on being stateless. Do u not read?

And by anyone who builds things, do u mean a factory owner, coz factory owners don't build shit but the workers do. And Marxism focuses on the liberation of the worker from the oppression of the bourgeoisie.

Also people who work in the living world making tangible goods do have a tendency for smth called 'daily resistance. ' It is a concept by Bernard Cohn. Pls read and expand ur pathetic brain by atleast 2 IQ points.

@decemberpdf and @sunder-the-gold , pls learn to read more and not spout ur every brain-fart on this platform.

Peace

Marxists are not found in farms or factories; they are found in colleges or government bureaucracy

Or, like Marx himself, the Marxists are found freeloading on trust-funds, or wealthy family and friends.

People who work for a living to produce tangible goods do not dream of a world in which some nebulous "other" is forced to provide them tangible goods for free.

Laborers dream only of a world in which no one makes their labor harder than it needs to be, and no one takes the fruits of their labor away from them without adequate compensation.

But people who only know how to place obstacles in other people's way and to take resources from others, will necessarily dream only of a world in which they have unlimited power to make life harder for the people they do not like, and to take as many resources as they want from people they do not like.

Marxists want to believe they can "manage" humanity into paradise because they are managers, not builders.

Marxists cannot understand the concept of "building" humanity into paradise. Building things is "beneath" a Marxist; anyone who builds things for a living is an enemy, and all enemies must be forced to build things that the Marxist gets for free.

Because the Marxist always wants for free something that cost someone else to make, they have no reason to ever achieve "true communism" because that would mean they have to get down in the dirt with the hideous factory workers and farmers they hate so much.

And then when their totalitarian state crumbles and falls around them, they dismiss their failure as "not true communism".

[carinyms]

I've scrolled through a lot of discourse on episode 4 of Loki and I need to talk about it

(good lord its a whole essay im sorry)

I gave myself a headache from crying while watching this. (I joined the Loki fandom post-IW so I’ve never had to see him die before while emotionally invested and boy!!! Is it doing things to my fragile psyche!!). But now I’m rehydrated and more stable and ready to party so let’s go

Right off the bat, I loved this episode — loved it loved it loved it. Silly, manic in-shock Loki is gone and shit is getting real. My thought while watching this was truly “wow this is my favorite episode so far” and damn am I in a minority with this opinion lol.

So here’s my perspective on some of the discourse flying around, and just general thoughts

On the whole ‘Narcissist’ thing:

IMO, Mobius saying this means nothing: he’s mad and he’s spouted lies at Loki to push his buttons before (see: every interaction they’ve had since episode 1).

Loki saying this to Sif-- well, Loki is and always has been an unreliable narrator on himself. The major theme of this show is that he doesn’t really know who he is, deep down, and he’s trying to figure it out. The TVA is taking advantage of this, and even though he’s trying to stay above it all throughout the series, he's still in a really impressionable spot and absorbing what others tell him about himself. (not to mention this scene is literal torture and he’s already proven that he’ll say whatever he needs to to get out of it.)

But he does admit one true thing when he says “It’s because I’m scared of being alone.” (And like wow okay same don’t mind my tears) but here’s a big brain idea!

Sif pulls him up and says ‘You are alone, and you always will be’, which is like, WOW that’s cruel after what he said, but it makes me ask wonder: Sif is sentient in this scene, but obviously it’s not really her. Who’s controlling her? And why is it so important for them to make sure Loki thinks he’s alone? I’d go as far as to wager that Sif never even said this to Loki, the big bad made this up. (he admits he forgot about this ever happening, I doubt he’d remember what she said.)

I think the nexus event on Lamentis that caused the branch was two Loki’s joining sides. Or, Loki no longer being alone. Loki insists while talking to Mobius that “she’s not my partner!” but she was, and they were partners from the moment they grabbed hands on Lamentis — right when the timeline broke off. I think Loki variants teaming up is the biggest threat to whoever is pulling the strings here — that’s why the post-credit scene is so significant. (Is Loki the only person who has multiple variants of himself who've escaped the TVA?)

And here’s where I’m gonna get salty--so I apologize but i need to rant about this-- but it’s seriously pissing me off that so many people are intentionally reading this as Loki/Sylvie and then being mad about it when that’s clearly not what’s happening and why is everyone acting like Mobius with one angry jealous brain cell and no critical thinking about the context of the characters.

If people ship it that’s chill, but for the people who are against it—it’s clearly supposed to be platonic, and it’s so upsetting that in the year of our lord 2021 we still can’t have a man and woman hold hands without people saying it’s proof they want to f*ck each other, like what in the misogyny??? STOP. This show was written by a bi woman and Tom the-most-emotionally-sensitive-man-on-this-planet Hiddleston — let them display an intimate loving friendship goddammit. This isn’t romance, this is Loki learning how to admit he cares for someone who cares for him in return — something he hasn’t experienced a whole lot of and clearly doesn’t know how to navigate.

(You have permission to personally come at me if it actually turns out to be romantic by the end of the show—but as of right now I will die on this hill.)

Him putting his hands on her shoulders to me was a clear indication he wanted to hug her, and I’d like to think he would have told her he cares about her, and that they can figure it out together. Because these are two characters who’ve never had anyone else to rely on and trust, and for the first time they’re not alone.

And I have to think about what prompted this from Loki. He just lost Mobius the moment after he called him friend. The way I see it, he’s just realized the true gravity of what they’re up against, and Loki is suddenly very afraid of losing Sylvie too before he tells her cares about her, of dying truly alone because he never told anyone what they meant to him. (Don’t think about this in the context of him also having watched his entire family die knowing he never told Frigga or Thor how much he loved them either don’t think about it—) He’s realized, finally, that he has doesn’t have to be alone, that he can choose to be close to people and have friends. And god it’s so heartbreaking that he never got to hug her or have that moment with her. I really hope they get that in the end. I hope he gets it with Mobius. I hope they have a group hug. I'm upset again.

Okay, deep breath, ANYWAY.

Hopefully this didn’t come off as attacking anyone else’s opinions.

Personally, I love this character so much, I’m just so happy to be seeing him in his own storyline that they can’t go wrong here. Objectively I think the production is amazing, and personally I love they way Loki’s character has been explored so far. (Yea yea, was I HOPING that the bad-memory loop would morph into Sanctuary and Thanos and like a full exploration of his true worst memories? Yes but let’s be honest my whump needs will never be met in canon and I have to accept that lol.)

Honestly I left all my own meta about this character at the door when the series started, because for me the opinions I’ve formed from the hundreds of (amazing) fics and meta I’ve read on this character and what’s true in canon are basically inseparable at this point, and no portrayal is going to live up to the way Loki exists in my head. Canon Loki and fic Loki are two different characters and I can enjoy both at the same time :) I’ve just loved seeing the character get given the different dimensions he deserves, and written by people who care about his story.

Also, it’s not over! If he was dead and this was it I’d be very upset, but this is the rock bottom of the storyline, and I think the whole next two episodes will be the build back up. I trust it’s gonna be worth it. SO hyped for flaming sword Loki. I would die for Sylvie, but I’m excited to see him on his own again.

My current most pressing questions are:

-what was the fallout of Sylvie’s bombing the timeline? (Have we seen that yet, am I just dumb and missing something?)

-Obviously, who’s behind it all? (Kang? Is there a head honcho Very Evil Loki at the top?)

-How much does Ravonna actually know, and to what extent is she just a pawn too? She asked Sylvie to prune her— she’s probably also been duped here.

-Is everything we learned about the sacred timeline BS? How much of what the TVA workers believe is real?

-my favorite theory so far is that the war of the timelines miss minutes talks about hasn’t actually happened yet, maybe making setting that into motion is the true endgame, leading into Multiverse of Madness?

(Side note: holy HELL im so excited for this soundtrack to drop on Spotify. It’s SO AMAZING I had CHILLS in the end credits.)

Open invitation to discuss anything with me if you feel inclined! :)

[is0gild]

Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 20

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 10,096

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

Turns out once you've smooched a guy on the nose, things like holding his hand and other such minor displays of affection no longer seem so daunting.

Sure, even as I reached for his hand now, some small amount of mental self-cheerleading was still required in order to work myself up to it. And okay, the tiny flutter in my chest when my fingers brushed against his almost had me pulling back faster than you could say 'emotion-phobia.' But I didn't. And hey, this was way more than I could have brought myself to do even just a few short days ago. This was kind of huge for me, so I think I'd earned the right to take a little pride in my headway so far. Who knew, I just might pull off my half of this whole pretend dating deal yet.

Lea glanced down at my touch. Then he grinned, pulling my hand up to press a soft kiss to the back of it before setting it back down on the dinner table, his thumb trailing light circles along my knuckles. Picking right back up where he'd left off in the conversation, he said, "Oh yeah, GUMMI ships got all sorts of badass tech going on now, the likes of which would put both Star Trek and Star Wars to shame. Super, ultra, mega-laser cannons, impenetrable force fields, swarms of nanobots that can repair any and all damage just like that," he snapped his fingers. Lea then planted an elbow on the table and leaned forward to add in a conspiratorial whisper, "They even have defense systems in the form of giant, exploding space duckies."

Saïx gave him a flat look from where he sat on the other side of the table from us. "Not true."

"Sure it is!" Lea chirped, straightening back up in his chair. "I mean, how else are they gonna fight all those aliens out there?"

Propping my cheek in my free palm, I cocked an eyebrow at him as I felt an upward tug at one corner of my lips. "Aliens? As in little green men?"

"No, no, that'd just be silly," he waved off with a scoff. "As in lil shadow men. Creepy bastards with big, yellow eyes and twitchy antennae." Still holding my hand, he brought both of his own up to either side of his head, miming said antennae with his index fingers.

Closing his eyes, Saïx gave a low sigh into his wine glass. "Also not true."

Lea shrugged, "Oh sure, they're not all like that. There was that blue one they found over in Hawaii, what was its code name again… Experiment 626? Yeah, the government got that one covered up real fast. And don't even get me started on the total dreadnought that is Schwarzgeist lurking out there somewhere in the night sky that absolutely obliterated the USS Endymion."

"The sheer amount of not true you are spouting off right now is positively staggering," Saïx deadpanned, eyelids drooping as he dabbed his napkin to his mouth. "You really need to stop staying up late every night reading all those conspiracy theories out there on the internet."

Lips curling into an evil smirk, Lea said, "But how else am I gonna royally piss you off so much?"

That earned him a small scowl from his brother.

This was basically it. The whole evening in a nutshell from the moment I'd stepped foot into Lea's apartment. Like me, it seemed that Saïx was not much of a talker, at least not amongst strangers. Unlike me however, it appeared to have less to do with social anxiety and more like he just plain wasn't a fan of the whole talking thing and so only did it when he deemed it absolutely necessary. Which I could totally respect. It was just that between the two of us, it had a tendency to leave a bit of a void in the conversation every now and then. Luckily, it was void that Lea was only too happy to fill.

Saïx had been the one to cook dinner. It seemed that that was part of the breakdown of chores in their living arrangement: he usually handled supper while breakfast was Lea's job. Saïx and I had already emptied our plates by now while Lea was still working on his, seeing as how he was otherwise preoccupied with talking a mile a minute. The meal had been a very nice chicken bruschetta pasta paired with a red wine from a fancy looking bottle. The latter I'd thought to be a bit of an odd choice, as I didn't picture Lea being much of a wine drinker. But there he was, sipping away at it, pinkie raised as he did so for an added bit of flair. I guess he just wasn't picky and would drink whatever was put in front of him. I, on the other hand, had decided not to partake. Would rather keep a clear head during this bit of subterfuge we were playing out in front of Saïx.

The point was, there was wine. And wine equaled a wine tipsy Lea. And a wine tipsy Lea, as I was discovering, equaled a chatty Lea. The boy was already chatty to begin with, but this was an all new level. This was chatty on steroids. Needless to say, he was having no trouble whatsoever keeping the conversation rolling.

"Why are we even discussing the GUMMI space program again?" Saïx asked in his bored monotone.

Lea drove his fork down into his pasta, twirling it around. "You know you're always a total slut for outer space, man. The moon and constellations and all that crap is your jam."

"Yes, but our guest," he gestured towards me, "might not find the topic nearly so interesting."

Trailing a finger along the rim of my still full wine glass, I said, "Actually, I've been fascinated by the research their lead mechanical scientist Cid Highwind has been doing in the field of warping technology. With his help, it might not be long before our ships can travel to other solar systems."

Both men just blinked silently at me for a moment.

What? So I liked to keep up on current events by reading a news article every now and again online. It really was not a big deal.

Saïx was the one to speak up first. "Yes. It's said Highwind is hoping to have a working prototype in less than five years."

Do my eyes deceive me? Was that the hint of a smile ghosting over Saïx's mouth?

Oh wow, I think I'd managed to score some points.

...not that it mattered, of course. Since this was only a fake relationship, after all, so getting in the brother's good graces didn't really mean all that much to me. Not one bit. Nope.

Nuzzling his nose to my ear, Lea beamed, "Hell yeah! My baby knows shit!"

"More than you do at least," Saïx sniffed blandly.

Expression relaxing into a sly grin now, he shot back, "I know enough to know about an astral sea monster whose sheer mass is gargantuan enough to blot out the very sun, the terror of the cosmos, eater of spacecrafts and destroyer of worlds, the dreaded galactic space whale," he paused for dramatic effect before splaying a hand out before him as he intoned in hushed reverence, "...Monstro."

Saïx grumbled under his breath and facepalmed.

"By my count, that's the eighth time he's done that tonight," Lea stage whispered to me. "Just five more and I'll have beat my all-time record."

I gave a low hum of amusement. "I suppose it's important to have goals in life."

He snorted, returning his attention to his food as he scooped a forkful into his mouth. I noticed that he'd incidentally stained one side of his lips in the process and I had a brief flashback to a familiar scene of Sora and Kairi. Of the pair of them sitting in the food court and Kairi kissing away a similarly located blotch on her boyfriend. Now that right there had been a seriously advanced dating technique and one I was in no way ready to try out myself. You kidding me? I was still very much a beginner here and the very idea of trying to pull off such a maneuver already had my ears turning pink. That said, a newbie like me still had some options, especially with my newfound ability to make the first move and actually touch my (fake) boyfriend without completely spazzing out.

I tucked in my lower lip, hesitating briefly as my pulse thudded a little more loudly against my eardrums. But then I slowly lifted my hand.

Lea visibly stiffened as he felt my thumb brush at the corner of his mouth, wiping the smudge away. As I began to retract my arm however, he dropped his fork to snatch my wrist and stop me. I arched an eyebrow at him. He smiled back with hooded eyes. Then he gently tugged my thumb up to his lips and licked the sauce off it.

Breath hitching, I yanked my hand free of his grasp. His smile just turned smug as he winked at me.

Apparently, Wine Tipsy Lea had even less boundaries than usual.

As I wiped my thumb with a napkin and ducked my head to hide my boiling cheeks, I heard Saïx mutter, "One has to wonder what a woman of your obvious intelligence and sophistication even sees in an asinine clown such as my brother."

"Well let me think about it," Lea's eyes danced as he folded his hands together, steepling his index fingers so the joined tips touched his mouth. "Perhaps it's my devilish charm and debonair good looks?"

"Oh come now," he said cooly with another sip of his wine, "if you're going to be making things up, you should attempt to make them at least halfway credible."

"He makes me laugh," I suddenly heard myself saying. As both pairs of eyes turned towards me, I immediately felt self-conscious. I mean seriously, what a stupid, cliché thing to say. But that didn't make it any less true, any less… meaningful. I wasn't someone who laughed a lot. In fact, before I'd run out on my wedding, I could probably count the number of times I'd laughed in the last year on one hand.

Fidgeting with my fingers, I pushed forward, "He's sweet… and thoughtful. And genuine. He's not afraid to be himself. And because of that, I find it easier to be… myself... around him." Another thing that did not come easy to me.

As Lea slipped an arm around my shoulders so he could pull me closer and plant a swift peck to my temple, Saïx gave a soft harrumph, "Well, I guess there's no accounting for taste."

"Psst, Saïx," Lea lowered his voice, bending forward over the table and cupping a hand to his mouth. "The moon landing was faked."

With a heavy sigh through his nose, he merely rose from his chair and started gathering the plates and silverware together. As he reached for mine, I protested, "No, that's okay, I can take care of it."

"You're the guest," he said simply as he swiped it up in one smooth motion.

"Best not argue, otherwise he might unleash his berserker wrath on you," Lea sniggered to me. However, when Saïx next took his plate away (still with food on it), he snapped, "Hey! I wasn't done with that!"

"Then you should have eaten faster," he responded dryly.

He stuck his tongue out at him. "Oh yeah? Well the earth is flat." As Saïx turned towards the kitchen, the plates stacked in his hand "accidentally" smacked into Lea's forehead, forcing a small grunt out of him.

I hid a grin behind my hand as Lea pressed his fingertips to the fresh sore spot with a soft tch. Then he downed the rest of his wine as he stood up himself, gathering the other glasses between his fingers on one hand while balling up napkins together in the other. He looked at me, face brightening, "Why don'tcha go on and take a seat in the living room. I'll join ya after I finish helping Saïx clean up."

"Alright," I nodded. He used a hand (the one stuffed full of napkins) to pull my seat out as I stood and gave him a tiny smile before moving past him. Reaching the blue sofa, I moved some of its mismatched pillows to clear a space and took a seat on the far end, tugging the hem of my dress down to cover my knees as I listened to the sound of running water and clinking dishware coming from the kitchen.

I didn't have to wait long before the boys were rejoining me. Lea came bounding over first, plopping himself unceremoniously down onto the couch with me.

Leaving one whole cushion space between us.

I furrowed my brow over at him. However, I did not have to wonder for long at his unexpected seating choice.

For next thing I knew, he'd flopped over onto his side and was using my lap as a makeshift pillow.

My eyes widened and I jolted, one hand going to my chest. His cheek nestled against my leg as one hand went to my knee, his thumb tracing lightly along its top curve over the fabric. "Mmm… you're comfy!" he sighed contentedly.

It was official. Wine Tipsy Lea had absolutely zero boundaries.

Halfway into taking a seat into a maroon armchair to our right, Saïx stopped. Then he straightened back up to his full height with a tired, drawn-out huff. "Perhaps some coffee would be in order."

I gradually relaxed, my eyes crinkling as I glanced down at Lea with a resigned smile. He was like a kitten cuddling into my lap. A really big kitten. I half expected him to start purring. "Perhaps that might be for the best," I murmured in agreement.

My eyes lifted long enough to follow Saïx as he made his way back over towards their kitchen, long blue hair swaying behind him as he went. When I looked back down, I realized with a tiny start that one of my hands had taken it upon itself to start lightly stroking Lea's hair.

Huh. How did that cheeky little devil get there?

I should stop.

But it was just so very... soft. Softer than I remembered. So soft that it felt like I was doing something wrong, something… forbidden by daring to touch it.

...okay, I really, really needed to stop.

...ten seconds. Just ten more measly, innocent seconds, then I'd stop.

There was a low, pleased hum in Lea's throat as my fingers continued to slowly run through his fiery locks. Then he rolled over onto his back, capturing my hand with his to press a gentle kiss into my palm. It tickled and my heart stuttered as I felt a familiar heat creeping up my neck. He... did know Saïx was no longer nearby to witness this little production he was putting on... right? Then again, maybe Lea was too far gone by now to realize his brother had left the room and so was still on boyfriend autopilot. Cradling my hand to his chest just over his heart, his other came up to start fiddling with the end of my braid from where it hung forward over my shoulder as he grinned up at me. "Wanna know?"

My head tipped to one side, "...know what?"

"You said what you see in me, so now it's my turn. Wanna know what I see in you?"

I blinked at him. Then my eyes briefly flicked over to Saïx just beyond the island counter where he was filling a coffee maker with water. Could he hear us all the way over there? Hopefully… this might be good for show. With a low snort, I planted my elbow on the armrest next to me, propping my cheek against my knuckles as I dropped my gaze back to Lea. "Sure, why not? Go for it."

This should be good.

His grin twitched wider. "You're kooky."

...well I certainly wasn't disappointed.

Though that wasn't quite the word I would have expected out of him. In fact, not the word I would have ever expected out of anyone when used to describe me.

One of my eyebrows quirked. "I'm… kooky?"

He nodded, "Mm-hm! Most people don't know it, but it's there. Way, way deep down in here," he tapped a finger to a spot just below my collarbone before going back to toying with my braid. "Ya try to keep it hidden. Don't like people seeing that side of you for some reason. But I've caught glimpses of it. I like it. Makes me feel like I'm in on a secret no one else is. And you're fun. Hella smart, too. And so goddamn pretty."

"That so?" I muttered, resisting the urge to roll my eyes.

Wine Tipsy Lea was laying it on a bit thick.

Still… I was smiling despite myself.

"And that. Right there," he tapped a finger to my lips. "Your smile is gorgeous. Was the first thing about you that had me head over heels. I love being the one to put it there. Love being the one that can make you laugh."

Did I say a bit thick? Try instead a lot thick. Too thick. Like two metric tons too thick. Jeez, perhaps I'd be better off hoping Saïx couldn't actually hear all this. Even he might think it a bit too much to be believable.

Lea's eyes softened as he continued to stare up at me, his hand shifting over from my mouth to lightly graze his curled fingers against my cheek, leaving tiny tingles in their wake. "...I wish we were real."

Insert record screech.

E-E-Excuse me?!

My heart stopped. Like legit full on stopped. There were at least three full seconds there where if a medical examiner had checked my pulse, they would have probably declared me dead.

Lea froze, his whole body locking up. His eyes grew round and his face blanched, his expression now a perfect mirror of what I imagined my own must have looked like in that exact moment as he seemingly and immediately realized his mistake.

Now I definitely hoped Saïx couldn't overhear us! There seemed to be no reaction from over in the kitchen beyond the sound of water beginning to boil. Which was good. Maybe our cover wasn't blown and-

...and so not the point right now! The point was… was…

Ex-friggin'-scuse me?!

Wish we were real? What did that even mean? Real what? Did he mean that he wanted… that he wished he and I… that we were a… an actual, honest to god coupl-

No! No, I must have misheard. Yeah, that had to be it! He hadn't said… er… what I thought he'd said. No, what he'd probably actually said was, uh… was he wished we were… seals. Yeah, that's probably what it was! Seals were neat! And… and cute! I wouldn't blame him for wanting to be one, especially in his less than totally sober state! Or… or… he could have said that he… he fished… for Neil. Who was Neil, one might wonder? Got me! But you know what? Good for Lea, helping his ol' pal Neil out with fishing like that. Nice guy, that Lea. Such a giver, such a-

"TORS!" Lea suddenly shouted, practically making me jump out of my skin as he shot up off my lap and scooted all the way over to sit at the opposite end of the couch. He had a hand clasped over his nose and mouth, doing a poor job of hiding his reddened (wine flushed?) face. "Realtors! I wish we were realtors, is what I was trying to say!" he hastily clarified, shooting a weak chuckle my way.

I stared at him blankly.

Wha…? Realtors…?

Apparently, he wasn't done. "Yeah! You know, one of those power couples you hear about all the time! Partners in everything, from romance to real estate! That's some real lovey-dovey crap right there, don'tcha think? The epitome of passion! The sappiest dream to ever sap! The-"

"What inanity are you babbling on about now?" Saïx returned, causing me for the second time in as many minutes to nearly die of cardiac arrest. He was carrying two steaming mugs, one in each hand.

"Nothing! Not a damn thing! Nope! Total nonsense!" Lea said quickly, snatching up one of the cups and rapidly blowing on the coffee a couple times before knocking back the whole thing in one go. He pulled the cup away from his lips with a wince, probably suffering from a tongue that was now at least mildly burnt. Then he plastered on a grin, "You know how I get when I'm lost in the sauce, man. I start rambling off total bullshit that I don't even mean. Never. Mm-mm, nope, not one bit! Every word of it? Total garbage. Yup! Heh…"

I flinched back from the second warm mug that was suddenly being offered me. I'd barely had a chance to hold up my hand and shake my head before Lea was grabbing that one too, handling this one with smaller, more cautious sips.

...realtors.

Huh.

Okay, sure, why not?

Not like it was any crazier than any of the other explanations I'd come up with myself. Especially when you considered Lea was more than a little buzzed. People said nonsensical things all the time while under the influence. I'd know, I'd seen Anna in a state of three sheets to the wind on more than one occasion. You should have heard half the things she'd blathered on about at the time… adventures through magical winter wonderlands, talking snowmen, singing rock people, whole castles made of-

Shoot, Saïx was talking to me. Or rather, had been talking to me for a while and now seemed to be expecting some sort of reply. Still a little rattled, I scrounged together a flimsy but polite smile, "I'm sorry, what was that?"

One thin eyebrow arched ever so slightly at me as he cradled a fuming mug between his hands. Apparently he'd gone back at some point to get one for himself as well. "...I heard you were present during one of my sleepwalking episodes a couple weeks back. I hope I didn't give you too much of a fright."

"Oh! No! No, it's-" I got distracted as I felt Lea gingerly inching back over to sit beside me. Probably trying to salvage some semblance of the relationship pretense. However, his affections had become somewhat subdued, restricted now to only resting an arm along the sofa cushions behind my head and his knee brushing against mine as he continued to nurse the coffee. Regathering my train of thought, I tried again, "It's, uh… it's alright. Not your fault. Nor was I bothered by it at all. Just had to stay out of your way, is all."

"Still I-"

"Ya know what?" Lea suddenly piped up, plonking the now empty mug down onto the coffee table right next to the first one. "Sorry guys, but I think we gotta call it an early night! I'm beat! And I mean woof! Dog-tired!"

My eyebrows knit together as I glanced over at him. "...but you just chugged two full cups of coffee."

...what are you doing, you fool, shut up! He was probably trying to rescue us by putting a merciful end to what, as of the last five minutes, had officially become one royal disaster of an evening!

He bat a hand through the air, "That? Please, that was just to help sober my drunk ass up! Trust me, caffeine doesn't do jackshit to me when it comes to staying awake."

Saïx's mouth had settled into a flat line as his green gaze shifted back and forth between Lea and me. "Very well," he said finally, closing his eyes as he raised his cup to his lips, "I presume my noise canceling headphones will be a necessity while I work tonight."

I frowned. "Noise canceling…?"

Lea cleared his throat and gave a sheepish chuckle while scratching a spot behind his ear. "He, uh… thinks you're spending the night."

"Oh…" I said slowly before his words had a chance to fully sink in. Then they did. "Oh!" I repeated more loudly, eyes widening as I rocketed up to my feet, "You mean sex!"

...what the actual frick, mouth?!

"Which is a thing!" Apparently, I was only getting started. Panic mode was in full effect now. "A thing d-dating couples do! Which… which we are! Dating, that is. And a couple! Can't, uh… can't forget that part." Dear lord, where's a gag when you need one? "Which, I don't know w-why you would. Because clearly we're a couple. Yup! That's us!" Yeesh, at least when Lea had been yammering off nonsense, he'd had wine coursing through his veins. What was my excuse? "A couple! A couple who, ah…" Oh no. "...who have, er…" Don't you say it. Don't you dare say it. "...who have sex!"

I winced.

Just shoot me. Shoot me now.

"Oh yeah, lots and lots of it!" Oh great. There was more. "All the time! In all s-sorts of, um… places. My room. His room. Oh look," I pointed both my hands towards Lea's door, "there's his room now!" Make an excuse to leave. Any excuse. " I think we'll go in there now and make with all the sex!" Not that excuse! Pause, followed by tiny, nervous laughter from me. "Yup."

Then before I knew it, I'd bolted into said room, door crashing shut behind me. I pressed my back to it, clutching both hands to my mouth as I hyperventilated and trembled, eyes huge and unblinking as I stared off into space, registering absolutely zilch of what was in front of me now.

What.

Did.

I.

Just.

Do?!

You know what, cheeks? I won't even try and stop you this time. You go right on ahead and blush your nonexistent little hearts out. Fry my face to a friggin' crisp, for all I care. I won't judge. You have every right after… that. Whatever the heck that even was just now!

Oh gosh, had I really just gone on and on about, hrm… intimate relations? In front of Lea's brother? That... had to be... the most spectacular case of anxiety-induced word vomit to date from me yet! What was wrong with me? Who does that? No, seriously, I demand answers this instant, what in the everliving-

A soft knock at the door made me yelp and jump away, whipping around to face it, heart trying to jackhammer its way out of my chest. I was greeted by my own frazzled reflection staring back at me from the full-length mirror hanging there. My face could have been mistaken for a ripe, oversized tomato.

"...El?" Lea's muffled voice came through from the other side. "You might've, uh… kinda forgot something."

A crease formed between my eyebrows. Forgot something? No, I don't think so. I glanced down at myself, hands patting over my dress. Phone in pocket? Check. Shoes on feet? Check. No purse, I hadn't used one tonight. No coat, I'd thought it too warm out for it. My gaze settled on the door once more, eyes scrunching. "What did I forget?"

"...me?"

Oh.

Fudge.

After that, ah… stirring speech I'd just given out there a moment ago, it would certainly help drive the point home if I had him in here with me, wouldn't it?

After all, it took two to, ahem... tango.

As I reached a hand towards the doorknob, I realized I hadn't even locked it. Lea must have only been knocking to be considerate. A consideration I greatly appreciated, especially when you take into account that this was in fact his room that I'd taken sanctuary in. Taking a deep breath and expelling it slowly in one last ditch effort to calm my nerves, my still shaking fingers closed around the knob and twisted.

I cracked the door ajar about an inch, just barely enough for me to peek one eye through. Arms crossed and one shoulder propped against the doorframe, Lea tilted his head with a tiny smile, "Hey."

My gaze fell to my feet for a moment before flicking back up to meet his. "...hi."

"Can I come in?"

I hesitated for another heartbeat then nodded, pulling the door open further and taking a couple steps back. He turned his head to one side, calling out a quick, "Night, man!" to Saïx before walking in and closing the door.

Ah, awkward silence. Ye hath returned. Never could stay away from me for long, could you?

"So…" I hugged myself and decided to get into a staring contest with the floor. "...think he likes me?"

Lea snerked, folding one arm behind his back, hand hooking his opposite elbow as he leaned back against the mirror hanging from his door. "You kidding? He adores you. Practically ready to call ya sister-in-law."

I attempted a smile. It came across as more of a grimace. "Even after I was… all…"

"...smooth and cool as a cucumber?" he supplied, his voice chipper. "Absolutely! And you said you couldn't lie," he teased. "You handled that one like a total pro!"

...oh. Wow, he was right. Not about the "pro" part, obviously, but that I had lied. For the first time since this whole charade started, I'd told a straight out, bald-faced lie. It had been a monumental failure, to be sure, but hey… we all had to start somewhere. Guess I had to take my silver linings wherever I could.

"Gah, I should have just made up some sort of… of excuse or something." I started pacing slowly, eyes still downcast as I brought one hand up to chew on my thumbnail. "Said I couldn't stay because I had an opening shift tomorrow."

He shook his head, "Saïx knows you work at the mall with me, so he also knows I woulda happily driven ya over from here, even at the crack of dawn."

Frowning, I tried again, "Well then, I could have said that… ah! That you had an early test tomorrow so I shouldn't be keeping you up late!"

"Nah, he knows me too well," he smirked, waggling his eyebrows. "Knows I'd never let a lil thing like that stop me."

I blinked. Then I buried my face in my hands with a groan. "Oh god, I can never face him again. Not after that." Dragging my palms down to peek out between my fingers, I grumbled, "I'm guessing it's safe to assume he's retracted his 'woman of obvious intelligence and sophistication' comment." Ha. Showed what Saïx knew.

Shrugging one shoulder, he laughed, "I wouldn't worry 'bout it too much. Just another side of your kookiness that I mentioned earlier. 'Sides, he knows what a nervous, jumpy creature you are."

Up quirked one eyebrow. "...he does?"

"Well, he does now."

...fair point.

One that did not make me feel better.

"And look at the bright side," Lea continued. "It's good this happened here rather than in front of your folks! Now you'll be better prepared to handle it the next time it comes up."

My lips twisted sourly, "I guess so." As bad as this already was, it would have spelled utter disaster if that little freakout had occurred during the upcoming weekend with my parents. We're talking one epic catastrophe here, like meteor-taking-out-the-dinosaurs kind of catastrophe. Then again, I didn't particularly see this exact set of circumstances arising while I was around my family. Still… best to be on the safe side. I wrinkled my brow, "Better prepared… how?"

"Ah, well…" he pursed his lips to one side, tapping a finger against his other arm. "For starters… and I'm just spitballing here, but next time you could maybe just, ya know… not say the word sex repeatedly? If at all? I'm thinking this is 'less is more' kinda situation."

"...good call."

"Heh," he paused, rubbing his shoulder. "So... looks like we're bunkmates."

I lowered my gaze once more and brought my curled fingers up to my mouth, covering my deepening frown. "Yeah… looks like…"

I wish we were real.

Gah, why was I still even thinking about that?! Lea had already explained it, hadn't he? Realtors. The word he had actually said, had been in the middle of saying, was realtors. It was nothing. Absolutely nothing. Just the ramblings of a guy who'd had a little too much to drink. Why was I still stuck on this?

My face must have been an open book. "Listen, I… meant what I said earlier," he spoke abruptly and my eyes darted up to lock on his. He averted his gaze and scratched his cheek, "You can't take anything I say too seriously when I've been drinking. Often my brain is just stringing random words together and spitting out the first arbitrary bullshit it can come up with. Like a toddler that's just learned to talk, regurgitating words it doesn't even understand just cuz it heard it from someone else at some point. Half the time, the things I say when I'm liquored up don't even make any sense." His eyes settled on me once more, this time accompanied by a weak smile. "So just don't be too… concerned about any gibberish that came blurting outta my stupid drunk mouth, 'kay? And you won't hear another peep of it tonight. Those two coffees are kicking in fast, so I'm much more clear headed now."

I tugged at my braid before folding my arms tightly together once more. "...okay."

And now onward to Act 1, Scene 2 of the award-winning and critically acclaimed musical: Awkward Silence.

"I have a lizard!"

My head rocked back at Lea's sudden declaration out of nowhere, both eyebrows shooting up my forehead. "...a lizard?"

He nodded eagerly, grinning big now. "Yeah! Wanna see? Come take a look!" He moved off to his left towards one corner of the room and for the first time I realized that there was a large glass terrarium situated on a long, low table in that spot. Lea squatted down next to it, waving me over to join him. I obliged and when I got close enough, he took hold of my hand and tugged me down into a crouch beside him. He squinted into the enclosure for a second, scanning all the rocks and plants inside before, "Ah-ha!" He pointed, tapping his finger against the glass, "There he is!"

And indeed, there he was, curled up inside a small, hollowed out log and blinking back at us. He was a tiny thing, all big eyes and blue skin except for the purple markings running down his back. "Oh wow," I slowly smiled, "you really do have a lizard. Why didn't you say anything last time I was here?"

"Cuz 'come into my bedroom so I can introduce you to my lizard' sounds a lil sketch, don'tcha think?" he chuckled, waggling his pointer finger up and down at his pet in greeting.

A soft snort. "Yeah, that might have earned you a dubious look." The critter crawled out into the open now, giving us a curious look. "Can I hold him?"

Lea flashed some dimple, "Course!" Straightening up, he moved the terrarium's lamps to one side before sliding out the lid and reaching inside, mumbling, "C'mere, Bruni." Picking the reptile up, he then offered him to me, "Now, the lil guy's usually shy at first but warms up quick and can be a bit of a flirt."

I stood as well, holding one hand out. Bruni cautiously put one stubby-toed foot on my fingers, eyeing me warily before fully walking the rest of the way into my palm. He was small enough to fit perfectly in it. Then he cocked his head up at me. I cocked mine back then hummed a low laugh, stroking a finger along the top of his head. That seemed to be all it took to win him over, for he then bellyflopped into a cuddle against my palm before rolling over onto his back.

"Bit of a flirt indeed," I murmured, rubbing his tummy with my fingertip. "What kind is he?"

"Salamander. Which, I know, technically not a lizard. But feels simpler most of the time just telling people that's what he is." He fell silent for a second, eyes crinkling as he watched us. Then he walked past me, saying, "Hey, welcome to my room by the way!"

I turned to face him and for the first time got a real good look at the place. If I had to pick one word to describe it, that word would be pandemonium.

Clothes were strewn about everywhere, covering floor and furniture alike - pretty much anywhere conceivable besides actually inside a dresser. Bookshelves stacked high with no rhyme or reason, textbooks next to movie DVDs (from action thriller to cornball classics) next to game CD cases next to vinyl records. Walls and ceiling plastered with posters, mostly of classic rock bands, but there was the occasional renegade: one here in which a dangerous looking man posed with an Assassin's Creed logo across the bottom, another one there depicting a grim reaper character dual-wielding sickles that looked to be from another video game of some sort. A queen-sized bed with black and red sheets buried beneath a mess of paper and more textbooks, along with a closed laptop and his shoulder bag tossed carelessly on top of it all.

And that was just barely scratching the chaotic surface. Needless to say, it was a lot to take in.

"Pardon the mess," he gave a rueful chuckle, scrambling to snatch clothes up off the carpet here and there to chuck into the laundry basket residing in his open closet, just under a black, full-length coat hanging from the rung in there. "Wasn't expecting any overnight visitors."

"It's, uh…" So many adjectives, so little time. As I searched for a word, I felt Bruni crawling up my sleeve. I kept an eye on him to make sure he didn't slip, but otherwise let him do his own thing. At last, I settled on, "...big."

"Yup! I got the masters! Comes complete with its own bathroom and everything," he jerked a thumb towards a second closed door on the other side of the room. By now, Bruni had found his way onto my shoulder and was snuggling into the crook of my neck. My fingers came up to pet along his spine. Narrowing his eyes on the salamander, Lea went on, "Surprisingly, Saïx prefers the smaller, cozier room. He's a minimalist, so not like he needs all that much space anyhow. Which works out for me, especially since I used to, er… heh, shall we say, host more sleepovers?"

I rolled my eyes and opened my mouth, but whatever I'd been about to say was forever lost.

For that's when Bruni did it.

He took the plunge.

Straight down into the neckline of my dress.

I yelped, arms crossing over my bosom. Lea's eyes widened, "Motherfu-" He lunged forward, hands outstretched before him like he had every intention of going down in there after Bruni. Then Lea froze, seemed to think better of it and instead folded his arms together, shoving his hands into his armpits as he looked away. "You, uh…" he cleared his throat, glancing at me out of the corner of his eye, "...you okay?"

"Yeah. Just tickles a bit," I wrinkled my nose, trying not to squirm as I felt the little guy climbing around against my chest. Thankfully, it wasn't long before he moved over to start making his way down my sleeve. I gave my arm a gentle shake to help speed his progress along and eventually he came tumbling out into my palm.

"Sorry 'bout that," Lea scooped him back out of my hand into his, using the other to ruffle his hair with a tiny, bashful smile. "I know I said he was a flirt, but he's never been this brazenly forward before."

Shaking my head with a snerk, I said, "It's fine, really. Don't worry about it."

Walking back over to the terrarium, he turned a scowl onto the salamander. "And what do you have to say for yourself, young man?" Bruni just answered with a lizard grin, flicking his tongue out to lick his own eyeball. "Smug lil shit," Lea grumbled, setting him back down inside his home.

One corner of my lips twitching up, I turned to take another look around his room. Despite Lea's hasty tidying up, his carpet was still a disaster zone of shirts and other garments. As I began to carefully navigate it, I asked, "So how are we doing this?"

"Doing…?" I could hear the frown in his voice.

I looked back at him. "Sleeping arrangements?"

"Oh! That's easy!" Having now set the lid and lamps back into their rightful places, Lea walked towards me with his grin resurfacing. "You get the bed, I'll take the floor."

My eyelids drooped. "You can't sleep on the floor, that's ridiculous. It's your room."

"Exactly!" he started clearing the papers up off his comforter, gathering them all together and tucking them away inside one of the textbooks. "It's my room, so I'll sleep wherever I want in it! And tonight, the floor's looking pretty damn good!"

I huffed. "Enough with the chivalry already. I'll sleep on the floor."

He picked up his laptop and made his way over to a large mound of clothes. Oh wait. There was a desk hiding under there, or so I realized as soon as he started shoving all the shirts and whatnot aside. Placing the laptop down on top of it, he then shrugged back at me, "Hey, if that'll make ya happy, more power to ya. Doesn't change the fact that I will not be taking my siesta in that bed tonight."

A low harrumph in my throat. "Fine."

"Fine," he agreed, now opposite the bed from me as he hung his bag from a wall hook there. Then he squinted one eye at me, "So it's settled then. We're both sleeping on the floor. Like the couple of rational, mature, grown-ass adults that we are. While the perfectly good bed goes to waste. Cuz that makes total sense."

I shot him a deadpan look. "Alright, fine then. Bruni gets the bed."

He slapped his forehead, dragging his hand down his face with an exasperated laugh. "C'mon, El, will you just take the bed please? I won't be able to fall asleep if I know you're just curled up on the floor."

"Sounds like not my problem," I crossed my arms with a smirk. Oh-ho, that's right. I could be stubborn when I wanted to be.

"Woman! Just take the freaking bed before I throw you in the damn thing!" both his hands gestured in mild annoyance at said bed.

Scoffing, I turned my head to one side. "Please, it's the twenty-first century, your neanderthal tactics won't work on me."

Green eyes flashing, he said in a low, even voice, "They will if I make good on 'em."

My gaze narrowed on him now. "You wouldn't dare."

He bent forward, fists planted on the mattress as he gave me a tiny glare across it. "Wanna bet?"

My legs turned traitor and defected, sitting me down on the bed so quick, you would have missed the motion if you'd blinked.

"There now," his face immediately lit up like the first rays of sunlight at dawn. "Was that so hard?"

I made a little hmph in my throat, tucking my legs beside me as I smoothed my dress over my knees with as much dignity as I could muster. "I'll have you know that I chose of my own free will to take the bed tonight and it had nothing to do with any thinly veiled threats that may or may not have been made on your part." I unzipped my ankle boots, letting them fall to the carpet below with a couple of heavy thuds. "I mean, I am the guest after all, it's only proper etiquette that I sleep in the bed. I'm just making sure you're adequately performing your role as the host."

A soft snerk came from his nose as he kicked off his own shoes and spread his arms wide to give me a mock bow, "Well, thank you, Miss Manners, I dunno what I'd ever do without you."

"You're welcome," I sniffed lightly. It was nice of him to let me have this. I then felt the bed quake beneath me as Lea flopped down beside me, stretching out comfortably and cushioning his head with his arms. I blinked down at him. "...I'm sorry, did that conversation just end differently than I thought it did?"

He raised an eyebrow at me, "Hm?"

"Thought you were taking the floor."

"I am, but that's not until lights out. Right now, we're just chilling!" he beamed. But then his expression relaxed and he propped himself up slightly on his elbows, cocking his head at me. "This is okay, right?"

"Er…" I glanced away, gnawing on my bottom lip.

Yeesh, I seriously needed to grow up. This wasn't a big deal. Like, at all. So what if we were sitting in the same bed? Nothing to freak out about. I mean, sure, I'd never shared a bed with a guy before, not even my ex. Come to think of it, I'd never even been in a boy's bedroom before. But hey, there was a first time for everything. This would be fine. I would be fine.

"...yeah, it's okay," I finally responded. He frowned, not looking convinced. I put on my best brave smile and managed a tiny laugh, "Really, it's fine." Or at least it would be once we stopped talking about it. Wanting to move the conversation along to something else, I searched my brain for a new topic. "So… you and Saïx…" I drew my knees up, hugging them to my chest, "...do you always mess with each other like that?"

"Oh yeah, all the time," he chuckled, settling back down into his pillow and folding one arm back behind his head. "Nothing says you care like making the other person's life a constant living hell!"

Settling my chin down onto my knees, I snorted. "Remind me never to let you care about me."

"Too late!" he chirped. My eyeroll belied the tiny cartwheel my stomach was doing. "'Sides, all siblings are like that. I'm sure you and Anna have terrorized the crap outta each other more times than you can even count."

"Well yeah," I turned my head to look over at him, resting my ear to my legs instead, "but that was way back when we were children. We grew out of it a long time ago."

Lea grinned cheekily, "Oh really? I seem to recall a certain someone chasing her sister 'round the living room trying to straight up murder her dead not hardly more than a week ago."

Wow, had that really only been just last week? It felt like eons ago by this point. A soft noise of contempt huffed out through my nose, "Don't exaggerate. I didn't try to murder her."

"How did it go again? ...ah, I believe your exact words to her were, and I quote, 'dip you in liquid nitrogen, snap every frozen limb off your body one by one, and then I'll kill you.' That about sum it up?"

I pursed my lips to the right, "...there were extenuating circumstances."

"Heh," he stared up at the ceiling, "if ya say so."

I lifted my head back up, my arms loosening somewhat around my legs as I considered my next words carefully. "About Saïx… can I ask what happened?" Lea glanced back at me quizzically and I clarified, "I mean with…" I tapped a finger to the bridge of my nose.

"Oh, his scar?" he rolled over onto his side towards me, bracing his head in one hand. "Old battle wound from our time in the foster system. Same shithead who let us two numbskull brats play with a chainsaw. Negligent and abusive. Real winning combo there, huh?"

"You mean a foster parent did that to him? On purpose? That's terrible," I breathed, looking horrified.

"S'okay," he gave a one-shouldered shrug, then smirked wickedly. "I retaliated by burning his house down."

My eyes widened, "Did you really?"

Lea sighed, "Unfortunately, no, but not for lack of trying. Only managed to set a bed ablaze and blacken a few curtains before the fire department showed up."

I stared at him blankly. "I am just... simply amazed that you survived long enough to make it to adulthood. Either of you."

He blew out an amused pft through his teeth. "Yeah, Saïx and I were definitely prime candidates for the Darwin Awards growing up. Told ya, we were lil hellions forged straight from the fiery pits of El Diablo. Hey, speaking of Ol' Bullseye over there..." he trailed off as he suddenly sat himself up.

"Bullseye?" I asked, arching an eyebrow his way while watching him fold his legs beneath himself so he could stand on his knees atop the mattress.

"Ya know. Mr. X-Marks-The-Spot," he tacked on by way of explanation, abruptly shoulder-slamming into the wall behind us just above his pillows and making me jolt.

...the heck?

"...you mean Saïx?" I furrowed my brow, wincing as he followed it up by crashing his elbow against the wall next. "Aren't those nicknames a bit… mean?" My question was punctuated with another loud thump.

Seriously, what on earth…?.

"Nah, he likes it." Whack! "Knows they're terms of endearment." Bang! "Only from me though. Anyone else ever even so much as thought about calling him anything like that, I'd make sure next time they turned up would be in a bodybag." Whump! "'Sides, you should hear half the shit he calls me, especially when he's royally ticked." Thwack! "This one time, he-"

"Wait. Hold it. Stop," I held up my hands, eyes flicking back and forth between him and the wall. "...what exactly is it that you are doing?"

"Huh?" he stilled, blinking at me a couple times. "Oh this?" his shoulder rammed into the surface once more. "This is the wall I share with Saïx's room."

...well okay then, sure, that totally and one hundred percent cleared up my utter confusion and lack of comprehension.

Not.

"Alright," I said, stretching the word out. "And so…?"

"So he's come to expect a certain level of enthusiasm on my part whenever I'm entertaining a lady friend," Lea winked and clicked his tongue before once again striking the wall.

"Oh?" I frowned down at my hands. Then it clicked with another louder, "Oh!" Followed by a slower, more quiet, "Oh…" Cheeks warming now, I looked back over at him, "You mean you… that is, against the wall, you've… oh." A pause while my eyes shifted about in my awkwardness. "But wouldn't the headboard get in the-" I stopped, glancing back over my shoulder and answering my own question. "Oh… oh, I see. No headboard. Got it. How very, er..." I cleared my throat and ducked my head to my knees, muffling into them, "...very practical."

I heard him snerk as the beating the wall was taking continued. "You're funny when you're flustered, ya know that?"

My face cranked up the heat dial even further and I scowled.

If you listened closely, the signs of a very steady, very distinct rhythm to the pounding could be heard beginning to take shape.

...I needed to stop listening so closely.

My eyebrows knit together as I then remembered something. "Wait… didn't Saïx say something about noise canceling headphones?"

"Well yeah, so he's not hearing any of this, but he can still see whenever any of the crap on his shelves or any framed pictures or anything else that might be up against his side o' the wall shakes from the impact," he shrugged, halting to puff out a noisy breath and wipe his forehead with the back of his hand. Apparently, he was working up a sweat. Then he grinned brightly, "This is actually kinda fun! Wanna have a go at it?"

I shot him a flat look. "...I think I'm good, thanks."

"You sure?" Another slam. "It's actually pretty satisfying. One might even say cathartic. Got any pent-up aggression you gotta work out?" And another, this one taking the form of a punch. He immediately regretted that one, eliciting a pained hiss as he shook out his now reddening fingers.

"Yeah, no," I rapidly shook my head, "no pent-up aggression here. Fresh out." Insert weak chuckle at my lame joke that was neither funny nor an actual joke.

"Suit yourself," he laughed, smacking the wall hard with an open palm this time. Then his back snapped straight and his face lit up, "Oh yeah! Before I forget…" he pivoted to his left, reaching into his messenger bag he'd hung up earlier and rooting around in it.

I snorted, "Done already?"

"Just giving that wall a breather," he said, not looking up from his searching. "We've found some other surface to bear the brunt of all our lovemaking for now, but we'll probably be back to this one later."

Oh gosh. Way to go, mouth, you just had to ask, didn't you? Just when my cheeks had begun settling down too.

"Ah! Found it!" he triumphantly pulled something out of the bag. Flopping back down to once more lay flat on the bed beside me, he held it out towards me, "Pour vous, ma petite amie jolie."

I squinted at the booklet in his hand. Or more precisely, a catalog. "Twilight University?" I read the bold lettering as I reached out to take it, staring at the image on the cover of a handful of young adults gathered around in a small circle of desks and looking photogenically excited about education.

"Yup! It's the course listings for next semester at my college. Lookie here," he opened the booklet up, leaving it propped in my hands as he started thumbing through it quickly. "Ah, there!" he stopped on a page, resting his head on my shoulder as he pointed to one of several listings that had been circled here. "They offer a few different introductory drama classes ya might be interested in."

I blinked down at the catalog as vague memories of a conversation I'd had with Lea last time I was here to help him study started coming back to me. "...you remembered?" I asked quietly.

"'Course!" I could feel his cheek pull into a smile against my shoulder. "It seemed important to you, so how could I forget?"

Honestly? I myself had forgotten. But to be fair, I had had a lot on my mind the past couple weeks, what with suddenly having a boyfriend now (pretend or otherwise), trying to figure out how to make a proper show of being a girlfriend, and stressing out over the all too soon to come visit with my parents. Frankly, my life had been turned upside down as of late and had become the very definition of insanity. There had just quite simply been no time to think about childhood fantasies of singing and performing in musicals.

But I guess… right here, right now in Lea's room, I had a bit of a reprieve. I mean, it's not like there was anything exactly pressing at this very moment, nothing that couldn't wait until tomorrow at least. I suppose I had a few seconds I could spare to entertain the thought. It couldn't hurt anything…

"...so where is Twilight University exactly?" I stretched my legs out to lay flat on the mattress, crossing my ankles and resting the open booklet down in my lap. "Is it close to my apartment?"

He hummed low in thought. "Probably a bit too far if you're on foot. But maybe we could carpool there. And hey," he lifted his head to glance over at me, "I still got a free elective course or two that I need to take. I could enroll in the class with ya!"

I felt a grin tugging at one corner of my lips as I looked back down at the catalog, absently trailing my fingers down one of the circled paragraphs. "I think I'd like that…"

"Yeah?" he asked softly and for a second I thought I might have sensed him leaning in a little closer. But it must have just been in my head, for now he was pulling away to flop over onto his back on his side of the bed once again, making a small cough into his fist. "I, uh… talked to my friends too. The ones who run the local community theater. You're in luck! They're between shows at the moment and are actually gonna be holding auditions soon for their next one. Sometime this week, I think. It's a musical too!"

"Really?" I returned my gaze to him, closing the booklet but using a finger to hold the page. A sigh then escaped me as I worried my bottom lip between my teeth, "I don't know… I doubt I'm ready for anything like that."

Lea shook his head with a chuckle, "Ready for what? Just to talk to 'em? It's not like you actually hafta audition or anything. Nah, you can just head down, meet them, get some deets… maybe find out the where and the when so you can go and just watch other people tryout, ya know? Just get a feel for it, if you want."

He made a good point. And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious. I could go and just ask some questions, that's all. Surely, there would be no harm in that. "Maybe…"

"Well if you do decide you wanna drop in for a lil chat with them, their day job is over at Halloween Town in the mall. They should both be on the clock there around noon tomorrow. Ask for Jack or Sally and just tell 'em I sent ya," he jabbed a thumb into his chest with a big grin, "got it memorized?"

"Jack or Sally… okay," I nodded, responding with a small smile of my own. "I might do that. Thanks, Lea."

"Always happy to be of service! Now," he hopped up off the bed and made his way over to one of his shelves that was pure anarchy incarnate, "whaddya think? You up for a movie?"

The corners of my eyes crinkled and I set the catalog aside on the nightstand. "I could be. What are the options?"

He rubbed his chin, scrutinizing the mess crammed into the rack before pulling out a couple DVD cases, one from the top shelf and the other from somewhere in the middle. He held them up in either hand for me, "I'm thinking either Sixteen Candles or The Labyrinth. Thoughts?"

I looked between the two choices. Then my eyes scanned about the room and I frowned. "I'm thinking it's going to be hard to watch either of them without a TV."

"Without a-?" he blinked a couple times, looking over to his right. Then he sighed, "Hang on a sec," as he tossed the movies down onto the foot of the bed and made his way over to another towering pile of clothes against the wall directly across the room from his bed. "Watch and be amazed as I make a flat screen appear outta thin air in three… two…" he whipped the garments aside with a flourish, revealing the television beneath, "Ta-da!"

"Ah," I gave a polite clap and settled more comfortably down into his pillows, "I stand corrected. Though who needs movies when we have your amazing wizardry to keep us entertained?"

He scratched the back of his head, "Heh, it'd be a short magic show. 'Fraid I just got the one trick up my sleeve."

"Too bad." I paused, eyeing the DVD cases. "Make it a double feature?"

He snapped his fingers and snatched them both back up.

"Girl after my own heart. Pure genius."

Author's Note: Ah, yet another classic cliché for the books: our couple encounters one room, one bed for the night xD Also, fun fact: I started out this chapter stumped for what they should be talking about over dinner. Then I asked my bestie, who simply said: "gummi ships." And I just laughed it off at first, all "naw, that wouldn't make sense for this AU." But then it churned in my mind for a few minutes and I was like "wait… no… I think I can make this work…" And thus the Global Union for Multigalactic Mobility Investigation aka GUMMI Space Program aka NASA rip-off was born xD And further thus, Lea being an alien conspiracy-nut JUST for the sake of pissing of his space-loving half-bro was born xP Anyhoo! For those of you who haven't seen Frozen 2 yet (for shame, it's SO good, I demand you go out and watch it THIS INSTANT), Bruni the salamander is from that! He's a fire spirit in the movie with legit fire powers, so I got excited to give the fire boi a fire lizard for a pet! Also, maybe you can start to see the inklings of actual plot starting to sneak back into this story xD Slowly, we'll get back on course, but not before at least one more hijinks-y misadventure takes place… hehehe…

What does the next chapter hold in store for out couple? What new challenges could their budding fake relationship face? Is Elsa really going to pursue any sort of acting class or community theater? Will Lea ever follow his realtor aspirations he seemed so passionate about? Stay tuned!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you who’ve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

[in-tua-deep]

me n a friend have been talking abt how to make a happy au where everything works out for the best and tbh my proposal is: that last time five time travels he doesnt make it to the apocalypse, he jumps right into reginalds funeral and just the fact that their annoying rebellious preteen brother who needs people to look after him is there, they collectively pull their heads out their asses and the apocalypse doesnt happen thru the power of sibling love (+being made more responsible), ur thoughts?

OOH curious, an au where Five travels straight from when he was thirteen to his dad’s funeral? 

Five absolutely doesn’t believe that Dad is dead or that his siblings are his siblings until they PROVE it and then he basically is like what the fuCK luther you’re HUGE and allison your hair!! klaus you got so tall!! why is everyone except vanya tall as fuck!! 

“Hey where’s Ben?” Five asks, all excited and wide-eyed and the rest of the squad is like surprisedpikachu.jpg

When he finds out that Ben is dead he tries to travel back in time to prevent it and that’s when he comes to the realization that moving forwards in time is a whole different kettle of fish than moving backwards in time which sparks its own little breakdown because until that moment he was treating this as sort of a fun vacation with his cool older siblings and didn’t realize that he was stuck there

So the whole squad gets to find out via breakdown that Five hadn’t really meant to run away and was always intending on going back to them and that he just got stuck

Five calls them out on their bullshit regarding Vanya because he literally just came from a time where Vanya used to sneak into his room in tears after Reginald called her useless and ordinary for the nth time so maybe he’s a little protective and he’s just like “holy shit dad is DEAD and y’all are STILL spouting his same bullshit regarding Vanya”

Diego, who hates the fact that he was just compared to Reginald, decides to be a contrary bastard and immediately start treating Vanya nicer because honestly sometimes spite is the best motivator

Seriously how do the siblings not cotton onto the fact that their brother who sees the dead can see their very dead brother?? whatever, Five is from a time where Klaus was just doing weed and not heavy drugs so as soon as he finds out Ben is dead and after he has his subsequent breakdown he turns to Klaus like “hey hey ask Ben where the fuck he put my book on interdimensional theory I need it for reasons” and Klaus is so surprised he just automatically relays the information and then the rest of the family are like “what” as Five jumps to go retrieve it

Five is still conditioned by Reginald to like. Be a good little child soldier. And I’m gonna say the running out wasn’t a common occurrence, so instead Five gets to bug his siblings to take him places because also he’s thirteen and can’t drive

“Dad is DEAD” five says, wide eyed with possibilities, “holy shit. Is griddy’s still open? can we go to griddy’s? in DAYLIGHT? without sneaking out? holy SHIT”

in the face of this excitement over something as small and simple as being able to go to a diner when he wants, it’s not like they can say NO. even luther wavers because honestly griddy’s is a nostalgia trip and a half and he’s been on the moon for four years and… dad’s dead it can wait for like, an hour right?

The commission is like “hmm. fuck. better send some people to get the timeline back on track” except now it’s the whole squad who deal with the Griddy’s Assassin situation and Five helps because this is what’s he trained to do!! taking down armed gunmen! look at them doing their job as a family

meanwhile the others are freaking out internally because five is a BABY and he’s in DANGER also looking back they were ALL BABIES WHAT THE FUCK DAD and five is just smiling while warping around bashing people on the head with diner mugs

Klaus and Vanya are ducked under a table bonding about not being super helpful in fights and Klaus is like “tbh idk why dad let me go on missions and not you like i remember when you got allison to teach you that highkick p sure you’d be more useful than me” and vanya is touched

they don’t come out unscathed and Five is bleeding and everyone is freaking out over it and five is just like “dude i’ve had worse lmao like literally dad has given me worse than this” and everyone is reminded that their dad was a dick and even luther finds his faith shaken because five is so little and he doesn’t remember them being that little,,,

they still make Five get patched up when they get back home as they try to figure out Hey What The Fuck Was That and five is literally getting stitches and he’s still excitedly asking them questions about their lives

and he’s thirteen and so sheltered i cry so he’s very impressed by like, everything

“we should watch some of allison’s movies!! we can watch movies together now, right?? i mean even dad would let us watch a movie if it had one of us in it surely! i want to see!” “!! Luther you went to the MOON? what was it like? were there aliens? did you see the flag? did you bring back moonrocks? can I have one?” “klaus your skirt!! i know dad never let you wear the stuff you wanted and now you just can! you can wear whatever you want! that’s so cool. can i do that? can i wear whatever i want? klaus klaus can you paint my nails? can ben pick out the color?” “vanya you’re in an orchestra!!! and you have a concert! that’s soo cool! does it matter that you aren’t first chair? you’re in an ORCHESTRA. i knew you were gonna be great with the violin!! can we go to your concert?? please? how much are the tickets? I probably still have my piggy bank in my room if no one’s touched it”

(Klaus touched it. Klaus 100% stole that money a long time ago. Allison cuts in and decides that as the wealthiest sibling and the currently most maternal and she is just melting at all this she will buy the whole family tickets to Vanya’s concert and they’re all going to attend as a FAMILY even if she has to drag everyone there by the ear)

everyone is immediately like “i am going to give this child the world and do all the things that we never got to do as children holy shit also now that i’m more distant from the events i never realized just how little autonomy we had and the fact that Five is so excited about being able to wear non-uniform clothes is a little depressing”

luther out here like “but,,, but the murder mystery”

and they all consider that and think that hmm. maybe those mystery griddy gunmen actually had something to do with dad’s death? okay okay, maybe just maybe luther isn’t being an idiot about this

if you think thirteen year old five doesn’t JUMP at the chance to be a part of uncovering a murder mystery you are incorrect and the siblings are immediately like “hmm. five has already gotten hurt. he is child. we should be,,, protective.”

vanya goes back to her apartment and still meets leonard peabody sorry guys but it’s kind of her job and i don’t want to take that away from her

she does still end up going to leonard’s house except five gets really bored of being smother by the rest of the squad (and they’re all WEIRD about the oddest of topics it’s stupid) so he goes off to find her and ends up ALSO at leonard’s house except he find reggie’s notebook and is like “hey i recognize this!! this is dad’s! i saw him writing in it yesterday!” and instead of letting anyone know he just kind of stuffs it up his shirt and steals it (it’s not stealing if it belongs to dad) and bugs Vanya into going home with him

he looks at the journal (he was always too curious for his own good that’s what got him into this situation) and so he reads about vanya’s powers

and immediately busts into the kitchen for family dinner like “GUYS HOLY SHIT”

and so that’s how the family finds out vanya has powers, it’s a big revelation, five is super enthusiastic because now vanya can come on missions with them suck it dad!! because he 100% isn’t aware yet they don’t still go on missions together and five is already like “we gotta train this!!”

idk pogo probably comes by and reveals the whole nanny situation and allison makes that reveal and vanya is fucking DISTRESSED and tries to leave but five latches onto her wrist and is like “vanya’s never been ordinary a day in her life!! have you heard her play the violin!! your rumor didn’t even work!” which is v touching to vanya and calms her down at least to continue the convo

luther is like “clearly she’s on the meds bc she’s dangerous so we can just continue those it’s fine” because it’s not like she’s hurt someone he cares about in this timeline tbh

allison meanwhile is trying to be a better sister in general so she counters back with “she was FOUR she didn’t understand the concept of death, now that she’s older and past the toddler tantrum phase i think it would be fine for her to actually learn about her powers”

but it’s klaus who’s like “hey, maybe we should ask vanya what she wants??”

and vanya is like,, i want to know. it wasn’t nice feeling like a burden back during the diner shootout, and i think i’d like to maybe try and explore this - and if it’s too much then there are always the pills (bc at this point vanya is still on those and doesn’t realize they inhibit her emotions, when she does she ends up not wanting to go back on them)

vanya gets the love and support she needs!! luther gets some validation for his dad was murdered theory bc the squad investigates with him and they find out about reggie faking his murder a lot earlier! allison doesn’t get her throat cut! klaus gets the love and support HE needs!! and decides (with ben’s input) that he needs to at least attempt to be a good role model bc five has already asked him if the drugs are more important than family when klaus tried to duck out of an allison movie night! diego gets to leak his protective instincts all over five and also take out his anger issues on the commission agents being sent after them! five gets to have an actual childhood even if he does chafe sometimes at his siblings being weird and protective!

literally the apocalypse is ended by five gasping and saying “WAIT can we go to the ZOO?” and making them all go on family trips together where everyone is included because!! they’re his siblings! he wants everyone to be there! he’s gonna see a lion motherfuckers! in person!

also a lot of the things five thinks of are things the siblings just,, never had time for. so it’s a first experience for a lot of them, and so no one really has a good reason to say no?? because they kind of want to go, too?

five, literally vibrating in excitement: i want to go on a roller coaster

like i know you said about preteen rebellion but look he’s come out into a world where his dad is dead and so there’s the potential to do ALL the things he’s always wanted to do but knew dad would never let him like holy shit!! family laser tag! paintball! let’s take a roadtrip to the beach guys i’ve never seen the ocean!! let’s go ice skating! go on a ferris wheel! eat ice cream on the couch! throw popcorn at the tv! lets blast abba songs through the house and make a blanket fort!!!

like it’s gonna take a while to get through the exhausting excitement of “LOOK AT ALL THESE FORMERLY FORBIDDEN THINGS I CAN TRY”

and just throughout this they’re dispatching commission agents and fighting hazel and cha-cha and trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with that as well as teaching vanya how to control her powers which everyone is trying to help out with and also dealing with five literally bouncing off the walls one half of the time and the other half of the time being passed out somewhere due to running out of energy

“klaus i want to get a puppy” “we are absolutely doing that, no ben we don’t need to consult anyone else about this” “i’m gonna name him mr. pennycrumb” “you do that buddy why the fuck not”

but yes. what an absolutely blessed and happy au. i love u and tell ur friend that i love them, too

prevent the apocalypse through the power of reconnecting with your inner child and dragging your family along behind you

[danetobelieve]

Lessons In Intent || Ricky and Winston

While Ricky had many things about his home that he liked, he had to admit that his absolute favorite place was his workshop. The guest house that he lived in had a two stall garage out back, but he’d never parked his truck in there, instead opting to renovate it into a place where he could come, blast music, and work on his craft. Recently however, he’d done some more renovating inside of it, condensing his stuff and clearing up about a third of the space for Winston to use. Since they’d started really claiming their magical ability for their own, Ricky had wanted them to have a spot for alchemy or whatever else they were trying, someplace safely away from the home they both lived in. He hardly noticed the lessening of his workspace however, as he had been completely and utterly consumed with his latest project. The fact that Remmy had solved his puzzle box so effortlessly and quickly had cut him in a deep deep part of his soul, and almost all of his spare creative energies were being channelled into making a new one, a better one, a harder one. Taking inspiration from several episodes of a podcast he’d been listening to, this newest design was founded on fractals, and the strange branching paths they took. A dodecahedron by general shape, it was the designs on the sides, laid in white and stained-black wood, that had to be shifted and manipulated to cause the complex locking mechanism to release itself, revealing the velvet lined interior. It had been weeks he’d been working on it, and with the sheaves upon sheaves of schematics drawn in his loving hand laid out in front of him, only about 30% of the actual assembly had been completed. It was his rabid focus, coupled with the loud music playing from the stereo behind him, that caused him to completely not notice Winston entering their shared creative space until he looked up through his curls, “oh hey dude! Sup?” 

When Ricky had suggested that Winston use the space in the workshop as their own, they had been skeptical. But they’d had a spare rig that they’d finally moved from their parents house that they wanted to set up and it gave them a good excuse to spend time with Ricky. Their lives were so full of supernatural shit now that Winston struggled to see their friend regularly. Hanging out adjacent to one another was interesting and after Winston set up that space that had been dedicated to them, they elected to spend time working on a small project. They had some questions about the extents to which enchanting could go, however it seemed to them that the main thing they had to master was the form of the spell. They started with something simple, a locking enchantment on a small cardboard box that would in theory mean that only Winston could open it. They were deep within the prep phase and ready to test out their first time attempting an enchantment. Honestly they weren’t hopeful that it would happen. After all their magic was unreliable at the very best of times and getting it to cooperate in doing something more complex then spontaneous combustion left Winston feeling somewhat skeptical at best. Entering the workshop, they nodded to Ricky. “Not much, just working on this thing.” They nodded towards the shoe box that they were carrying. It seemed prudent not to use anything of sentimental value until they got more competent. 

Winston was a particularly calming influence in Ricky’s life; the young mage/wizard/arcanist always seemed cool and collected during even the most stressful of times, and some of that rubbed off on Ricky, who could veer into the borderline manic without much difficulty. Setting down the tweezers he was using to place tiny pieces of wood onto a purely decorative panel for the box, Ricky took a moment to retie his errant hair back, brushing stray sawdust out of the dark curls as he looked across the workshop at Winston, “On a shoebox? Do you have a dead pet in there? I’m not necessarily against necromancy but it seems like thats some upper tier magic that maybe you shouldn’t fuck around with until you get the basics down. Like time magic, probably should steer clear of that too.” He consulted the plans in front of him as he resumed assembling the panel; this particular face of the twelve-sided figure inspired by the fractal nature of fern fronds. One hand held the tweezers idly as the other traced over the design, muttering measurements and courses of action to himself under his breath, switching from spanish to gaelic to english and back again as his mind plotted out his next moves. He didn’t understand the magic Winston worked but, it seemed to be working out for his friend and that was really all that Ricky cared about, “If you want different music on or need it turned down lemme know. I’ve got earbuds I can put in.”

“The shoebox isn’t actually going to be anything, actually. I just wanted to practice on something without potentially enchanting it into something which isn’t usable again.” Winston replied as they set it down. They’d carried a laptop and a stack of wires for various peripherals they were installing in their work space. Their place of work was still a work in progress but they were beginning to get things closer to the way that they wanted them. Pulling down a screen that they’d mounted on an old adjustable arm they’d borrowed from the scrap pile at the station. The amount of old tech that they were able to salvage from broken or old units was mind blowing and Winston already had several boxes of scrap in their room. “I’m planning on learning how to enchant things, seems to be a lot of adding runes to stuff and then imbuing it with power but I’d be interested in looking at the potential power sources that could be involved and what that would change for the enchantment. But that’s all very theoretical because until I have been able to set up the enchantment, which I haven’t been able to do. The theory of it all is fascinating but actually getting it to work in real life has been more difficult.” Their magic was either feast or famine. They were either setting giant crabs on fire or they were struggling to cause flames to burst into existence. “You’re good dude, the music is fine. Although I think that chronomancy and necromancy are definitely beyond my scope and not something I want to fuck with.”

It had become very evident very early on in their friendship that Ricky and Winston’s minds worked in incredibly different ways, and listening to them talk about magic really drove that point home. Whereas Ricky’s mind dealt mainly in abstracts, thoughts ebbing and flowing as randomly and ephemerally as the waves that had birthed him, Winston’s was sharp and regimented, a cascading series of logical statements and hypotheses that marched onward toward practical solutions. It had never been a point of contention between the two of them, however. In fact Ricky thought that if anything it made them function better together, able to see various parts of problems the other’s mind didn’t arrive at naturally. “Well… that sounds complicated as fuck my dude. But…” the last piece of the panel slid softly into place, gentle susurration of wood on wood marking its arrival, and Ricky gently and carefully set it in front of a neatly labeled placard for the glue to dry before he varnished it, “It also sounds like you’re getting more confident in it all. Couple of weeks ago you didn’t believe your magic existed, let alone be able to spout magical theory like that. You’re coming a long ass way.” Picking up the next page of the schematic he started carefully pulling pieces towards him, humming under his breath as he did. “Work still going well?”

The separation of personality between Ricky and Winston had always had different ways of approaching the problem. They’d gone looking for roommates and found each other. At first there had been some conflict and disagreement as there was in any relationship such as theirs but they had worked through most of it and had found that they were able to live successfully in harmony. They’d learned their habits and moods, when someone needed company and when they just needed to be left alone. “Magic is complicated as fuck,” Winston still felt wildly out of their depth, they’d barely covered the rudimentary fundamentals since they’d began reading up on magic and though they had a basic understand of the core knowledge that they required they were yet to be truly an expert, “although I have made a lot of progress and I understand more, there is more then I would ever be able to cover and I’m quickly running out of resources that I can use to actually learn stuff.” They knew what world they lived in now and now that they did know they found themselves wanting to know more. “It might be new but it is fascinating, I can’t believe that I was ignorant for so long…” they trailed off and shrugged. “Works fine, it’s boring and honestly doesn’t seem valuable when I could be back here. But I still want to help people and this is how I would be able to do that, so gotta keep going.”

Ricky carefully set the tiny wooden gear he was carving before he allowed himself to laugh, “I think that might be the understatement of the century, my dude. Magic seems CRAZY complicated… and I am literally an animal that is sometimes a person. Your shit makes my shit look simple.” He resumed his work, leaning over the table-mounted magnifier that allowed even him, with his terrible vision, to do the tiny minute work this project required. “I’m crazy proud of you dude,” he kept his voice low, willing himself not to breathe too heavily as he talked, “I’m sure when you exhaust your resources here, there’re other places you can get stuff from. I’m sure there’s some like… dark web for magi. Mages? Spellsluts? I dunno what you magically self-identify as.” The music continued on around them as they both worked and as he set down the finished gear, Ricky picked up another piece of wood, its future form sketched on it in pencil, “Well I mean don’t be too hard on yourself, dude. A lot of the not-normal parts of White Crest work pretty hard to keep ourselves under wraps. You probs had to have some like… magical coming of age before you could even be ready to see the stuff that’s lurking behind the scenes here.” His hardened look of concentration softened slightly into a fraction of a smile as Winston kept talking, it was one of the many things that bonded them together, the need to help people and do good, “Life isn’t all magic and monsters. You gotta leave time for the normal stuff too. The helping people stuff.” 

“Magic is crazy complicated but it seems to be so inherent within our world now that I wonder if perhaps there have been examples of scientific observation that is actually just magic,” Winston replied quietly before shrugging, “Is shapeshifting not magic in someway?” They weren’t really expecting an answer but it didn’t exactly seem like it was a natural thing that had evolved. Though Winston was far from sure about that. Ricky's admission of pride made Winston feel happy, they hadn’t heard it like that before and a smile dragged across their face. “Thanks dude, I am crazy proud of you too, I know this has all been … something.” Skylar, magic, cursed chests on a beach, it was all a lot for them to deal with and Ricky has led the charge. “Exactly, I get the impression that we live in an area that has a lot to offer for this sort of thing and I guess I’d just call myself a spell caster for now. Though a spellslut is a good one.” They considered their past ignorance and shrugged. “It’s whatever, I don’t understand how anyone can live in denial about these things after having their first encounter with it, that makes no sense to me, if you’ve had a brush with this then how could you deny it?” Setting the box down, Winston began working on the enchanting circle that they would need to draw before they could do their magic. It was precise work but they had spent a long time practicing it. “Sure, but it is the magic and monsters that I find interesting…” 

“It is, and I’m there’s a lot of overlap between science and magic in ways that we don’t necessarily expect.” Ricky sent the small piece of wood down on the bench, replacing the thin file he’d been using to grind its teeth back in its spot on his tool tray, more engrossed in the conversation than the carving, “Oh it’s absolutely magic. But it’s…. Sorta a loose kind of magic? Like. It happens. It’s a thing. One moment there’s a man, the next there’s a seal, and the sort of in between is less regimented than some other kinds of magic I think. But yet it’s totes magic. Just… involuntary magic. Or at least it’s magic that exists in a way that encompasses me so fully it at least appears involuntary.” Pushing himself back from his work table he moseyed over to the electric kettle and flipped it on, dragging a mug down from the shelf, “You want some tea?” He shrugged as he listened to the water start to heat up, “Denial is a powerful thing,” an unmistakable air of bitterness crept into his voice, “Just look at Skylar. Demonstrably not a human, knows the solution to her problems, refuses to accept that or the fact that she has agency in the level of misery in her life.” Ricky idly watched as Winston started to draw something, that he assumed was in some way tied to the magic he was trying to work on a shoebox of all things, “They are interesting. You know, up until you’re cursed for a month or something wrecks your dining room or a hunter tries to kill you. But. I definitely think just plain old human life would be way too boring for me.” 

“I’m starting to see that a lot in everything that I read, this exchange of energy for magic is interesting, I wonder if it could be harnessed differently.” Winston was thinking out loud, they weren’t expecting an answer yet. There was a lot of hardwork that they still needed to do. “Nah I’m good man,” they said as they looked up at their friend. They moved the marker that they were using in a specific motion, marking the box in the way that they had memorised. “I wonder how that came about,” they said generally curious, “this is all so cool, is it evolution, was it magical, was it a mixture of the two, I doubt we’ll ever actually know but even the possibilities are completely fascinating.” They considered Skylar’s situation quietly, frowning to themselves and shifting somewhat uncomfortably at Ricky’s words. They knew that they were right, but that didn’t make it any less of a bitter pill to swallow. “I hope that she works it out, I’m getting really scared for her.” They paused for a second and gazed at their shoes. “Well, I don’t want to condemn or deny anything here, but I don’t think I would want to go back to not knowing. This is a world with so much potential and it’s almost being wasted by all these people who are too ignorant to engage with it.” 

As the kettle whistled, Ricky turned it off and filled his mug, plopping a tea bag in before moving back to his bench. “I think it’s one of those things where, if there was a distinct point where magic infected or changed evolution, it’s so far in the past and so buried in myth that short of legit time travel or oracular vision you’ll never find the clear point of separation. But it would be interesting, to know exactly how things like me came into being.” He pulled a trap full of tiny and well-labeled gears towards him, and set the schematic where he could easily read it. He’d checked a ton of books on locksmithing and clockwork out from the library, some of which they’d had to call in from other branches, and had given himself a series of progressively worse headaches trying to comprehend everything in them, but they’d all come together to make what he hoped was a diagram on paper that could be accurately mimicked in reality. “Mmmm.” he made a non-commital noise at Winston’s comments, retying his hair before bending to his intricate work, “Well. Me too. But also. Not my problem anymore. I tried being nice and supportive, I tried forcing her hand. She’ll figure it out or she’ll die and nothing I do will change that those are the only two outcomes.” He didn’t have the mental capacity to respond to the tail end of Winston’s comments, as he was entirely and wholly focused on the work of assembling one of the locking portions of the box, “Those people are dumb and will be purged by their own idiocy.”

Honestly, looking back at this with the blessing of hindsight, Winston would realise that things could’ve been left for a minute. Starting a semi complex incantation to enchant something, especially for the first time was a questionable move when you took into consideration the fact that Skylar might well play on their emotions. But they shrugged at Ricky and sat down in front of the box, shutting their eyes and slowly beginning to try and draw upon the well of power that they knew lived inside of them. They slowly and carefully began to chant in Latin, the incantation they had found was originally written in Latin and they’d spent all of their time committing it perfectly to memory. The tune that they had drawn onto the box began to glow faintly as they chanted and though they didn’t realise it at the time, the mixture of emotional turmoil at what could potentially be happening to their friend Skylar and what was some poor Latin pronunciation was enough to send things wrong. The rune glowed brightly and arch’s of arcane energy sparked from its surface. “Uh, Ricky,” Winston said having stopped chanting, “I might have fucked up.” 

Up until this moment, Ricky would have never known that magic had a smell. But it was there, over the smell of sawdust and wood varnish; acrid and ozone and pervasive. He hadn’t really been paying attention when Winston had started chanting, too engrossed in the minute trickery of his own projects. It wasn’t until that smell filled his sensitive nose and he heard them stop chanting that he noticed something was wrong. “Fucked up… how…?” He haltingly got up from his workbench, unable to look at the shoebox across the room, with how blindingly the arcane light sparked and flew off it. “That seems… very very bright. For a shoebox. Is uh…. is it dangerous?” It wasn’t long until Ricky had to press his hand to his eyes, the light too bright, stepping in front of Winston to shield them from… whatever might be about to happen. He could feel the light as an almost physical force, the magic pressing in on and against him and as it rose to a crescendo there was a brief moment where he wondered if he was about to die in a magical accident. Then. As suddenly as it had started it was finished, the room nearly pitch black after the incandescence Of magic gone wrong. “Win?”

“I don’t know how I fucked up, but it definitely is not meant to look anything like that,” Winston replied as they tried to draw the power back into themselves before realising that it was too far gone and whatever happened and they weren’t going to stop it right now. A bolt of arcane energy struck the panels of Ricky’s box and then the light exploded into the room and Winston was knocked off of their feet. Blinking, they managed to get rid of the spots on their eye and saw that the garage that they were in had been entirely encased with the various surfaces of Ricky’s puzzle box. “Uh, this apparently is how I’ve fucked up, I was just trying to put a locking enchantment on the box and it must’ve done something drastically wrong. Winston felt weak. Very weak. As if a good portion of their energy had been sucked from their body. 

“Okay I didn’t want to say anything because I don’t know shit about magic but that definitely didn’t seem like what you were trying to do.” Ricky reached down to offer his hand to Winston to help them up before he looked around at what…. He assumed… was still the garage. “Oh fuck.” Ricky didn’t see the carefully organized shelves and supplies that he was so proud of, instead he saw intricately carved pieces of wood arranged in a hauntingly familiar fractal pattern, and above where the door outside should have been was instead a very familiar set of initials; an R and C carved to look like a stylized wave. “So. Uh. Magic is uh…. About intent? Did I hear that somewhere? Maybe? Does uh… does it have to be your intent? Because… I might have been really fucking focused on the box. Like super focused on the box. Which… might be… why it looks like… the box maybe ate the garage? Or something like that. Either way. We might be in trouble. You’re smart right?”

Winston laughed. “Dude what gave it away that that wasn’t what I wanted to do…” they shook their head as they looked around them, “was it the flash of arcane light or the fact that I’ve turned our workshop into a giant version of your box… this is why you don’t fuck around with magic and I really should have known better but instead I fucked around with it, fuck fuck fuck fuck.” They looked around and moved over to the wall, placing their palms on the smooth surface of the wood. It was soft and well crafted beneath their touch. This was definitely something new. “Magic is definitely about intent and if you’re intent was to make a box and my intent was to lock that box then I am a little worried that we might well just be fucking locked in here,” they looked around the room, no doors or windows or even seams for them to pry open, “so we’ve got to find out a way out of a locked puzzle box.” They were well and truly fucked. They were going to die in here. Sweat beaded on their brow and Winston forced themselves to remain calm. They had to breath. There was a way out of here they just had to find it. “I am definitely not smart.” They looked around, what did they have to work with? 

“To be honest it was the blinding light and the almost 100% assuredness that I was going to die in a magical explosion. That pretty much made me confident that wasn’t your intended use of the spell. I’m pretty confident in the assessment that you don’t want to kill me.” Ricky scratched the back of his neck as he wandered around what was once his workshop. Whatever the spell had done with his box it hadn’t made a perfect copy. That would have been easy enough to solve; he’d spent so long drawing up the plans he could solve his own box in his sleep. But it had at the very least seemed to take the spirit of his box and transfer it into the prison cell they were now locked in “well I’m dumb as a box of bricks. So. That’s not great. But…” he trailed off a little as he looked at the walls, “okay okay okay. So. The original plan. Was about conversion. Take the original design and convert it in order of ascending scale into a different one.” Furrowing his brow he waved his hands around as he tried to explain. “I read a lot of books about fractals and clockwork and locksmithing in the last couple weeks. We just have to figure out what is the base pattern of the new design and that’s a good starting point.”

“I’ll be honest, there’s no way to know we aren’t dead but I plan to continue operating under the assumption I am still living until I know better.” Winston was starting to wonder if it was really safe for them to continue experimenting with magic in the house, they doubted that they had actually taken the proper precautions and if they made it out of this it was important that they took more steps to make sure that something like this didn’t happen again. “I don’t want to kill either of us if that makes you feel any better but of course there is apparently a limit to what I can handle.” They gazed at the array of shapes on the walls around them, they were trying to work out the shape from the lines facing everywhere. “Okay, so we solve the pattern, do you have any idea what the pattern might be?”

“Well… I’ve just been operating under the assumption that because I still have… you know… rational thought and understanding, we’re alive. I don’t believe in any sort of afterlife. But. I could be entirely talking out of my ass.. Because I’ve also never been magically bound in a facsimile of one of my projects before. So. brand new territory all around.” Ricky wandered around the border of the workshop, running his hands over the polished wooden pieces. “It would have been easier if your spell had directly copied my box. That would have been fine. But it just sorta picked up the vibe and went with it.” He pulled a piece of charcoal from a table and drew a box around a section of wood, “This looks like the fractal base. What all my schematics referred to as Pattern Prime. Original plan had three steps. Pattern Prime turns into Pattern Alpha, Pattern Alpha turns a larger section of the box into Pattern Beta, Pattern Beta turns a larger section of the box into Pattern Gamma, and then Pattern Gamma locks into the other panels of the box to finally make Pattern Omega. Only six of the twelve panels actually had moving pieces that connected to gears. The others were dummy panels meant to throw Remmy off the scent. So… yeah. That’s where we’re at with this. I mean I have axes in here. But somehow I think that’ll make it worse.” 

“Plato had a theory that when we die we as humans ascend to a plane of rationality and understanding, maybe we died and went there.” Winston wasn’t trying to be morbid. They didn’t really think that they were dead. But this situation was one of the more absurd ones that they had found themselves in. They couldn’t imagine the level of energy that it must have required for them to make this happen, even if it were accidental. They already felt exhausted. But they knew that it was possible that to resolve this they would have to expend more. Maybe they would have to start carrying an energy bar with them at all time in case they accidentally went too hard with the magic again. “It would have been easier if I could handle the most basic enchantments without locking us within a modified version of your puzzle box,” Winston was frustrated, apparently it didn’t matter what they did to learn they still were far from in control of their magic and there were very real consequences for their actions, “but also know I am judging you for calling them Pattern Prime, Alpha, Beta, Gamma and Omega. Wouldn’t it have been easier to call them pattern one, two, three, four or five?” They smiled gently despite the situation. “I wouldn’t advise axes either, I would like to keep as much of this intact because I don’t know what damaging an incorrect enchantment might do…” they shuddered to think, “Do you think that the actual mechanism could’ve been applied to this?” There was no physical mechanism in their garage normally.

“I’m sorry you’re gonna judge me for pattern prime and then sit here and Plato it up? You’re making it smell like nerd in here.” Ricky stuck his tongue out at his roommate and shrugged “that’s what some of the books called them so I just went with it. Also. I’m not human. So. I dunno if your Plato thing applies” seeing no other immediate recourse, Ricky wiped his charcoal covered fingers on a rag and set about making himself another cup of tea. “To be fair to you, dude, we don’t know how magic reacts to the presence of a non-human. I mean. I’m at least in some way magic, just not in any way with practical applications. That doesn’t seem like it’s setting up a good controlled environment for you to test your abilities in. You’re just starting out. Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Looking around he idly bobbed the tea bag in his mug; sharp smell of citrus filling the air. “I mean. Confinement aside. This is honestly super fucking impressive. You turned a whole building into a magical prison! That’s awesome! If we weren’t inside it would be more awesome but hey. Beggars can’t be choosers.” Carrying his mug he moved to a section of the wall, pressing his ear against it as he attempted to slide a bit of paneling. “It doesn’t sound like there are gears behind it. This might just be a purely visual lock”

A wry smile danced its way across Winston’s face. “Yes that is exactly what I am going to do and if you have a problem with the stench of intellect then I can’t help you because that isn’t me.” At least they could still have a good time even if they were potentially going to die in this room. They looked at Ricky and nodded. “That is a very good point, I forgot that you were a seal, you look remarkably human for a seal you know that?” They looked around the room. They knew that Ricky was trying to make them feel a bit better by offering them the possibility of a way out of responsibility but they didn’t think that they could blame this on them. “I don’t think that the presence of a non human would have really affected it, maybe it did, but it might as likely been a problem with concentration or an error in the enchantment that I physically drew onto the box.” They would have to design a template to ensure that this was mitigated as much as possible in the future. They looked around the room as more energy drained from them and pulled open one of their draws and pulling out a protein bar in an attempt to refuel with something that would battle the energy drain they were experiencing. Rubbing their eyes free of tiredness, Winston adjusted their lenses. “Impressive sure, concerning that I am capable of doing either barely anything or fundamentally changing the reality of a situation… this is not what I had meant to do and honestly the fact that it turned out like this is somewhat worrying, although at least we know that we can create something like this in case we need it.” They reached out and placed their palm on the wall, and took a step back as they were staggered by the experience they felt. “I can’t find physical gears, but there seem to magical like, lines, almost as if we could line them up like the original puzzle box…” they looked at the panel Ricky was examining. “Turn that ninety degrees, that way the line will line up with the panel to the left and right and then turn the panel above it 270 degrees and that will complete a shape.” 

“It’s certainly not me. I am a confirmed and notorious moron. Any stench of intellect therefore has to be coming from you.” Winking, Ricky took another sip of his tea, “well that’s the point isn’t it. That I look human. Have to confuse all you landlubbers. Hide in plain site and all of that.” Being trapped in a magical box that may or may not contain just their souls since they may or may not have been dead already was surprisingly relaxing since he was stuck there with Winston. “If I ever need a magical prison, which, given the concentration of Hunters in town I might, I’m going to come to you because this is impressive.” He put his hands where Winston indicated and made the directed changes, watching as the dark and pale wood morphed into a different pattern “okay now you do to the same thing on the panel over there by the belt sander. The way mine worked you have to do each transformation on each panel as a group. So they all get the final switch at the same time.” Now that Winston had figured out the base pattern they were meant to be changing on the walls, Ricky felt a lot better about their chances. He was definitely more useful in the action portions of a plan, and now that he had action to do he could finally be helpful, “see. You’re the smart one.”

“You know that you’re quite literally studying art..” Winston pointed out with a frown, “I know that you don’t think you’re an intellectual or anything but you’re smart. I can’t do half of the things that you can…” they shrugged gently and nodded, “you do a very convincing job of looking human and acting human…” they smiled, “I was fooled for a long time and I lived with you. In hindsight the signs were all there.” They laughed and shook their head. “I wouldn’t expect anything more like this from me, this is something that is way beyond me, entirely accidental, not what I wanted at all and I wouldn’t want to even attempt something like this without more guarantees, this trial and effort escape isn’t something I ever want to risk repeating.” Winston followed Ricky’s instructions and began rearranging the panels of the walls. It was good that Ricky was there to help them otherwise the actual practical application of the changing of the panels would’ve certainly escaped them for much longer then it had Ricky. With their help however they were able to make the prescribed changes. “I’m the one who can cast spells, it is a little different.”

“I’m plenty talented, don’t get me wrong. I’m an incredibly skilled craftsman, as evidenced at least in part by this fucking prison we’re in. This spell is a little bit both of us I think. But one of my students explained it in a super nerdy dungeons and dragons way once. I’ve got shit intelligence, but plenty of points in wisdom. I’m not book smart for damn sure. But. I’m intelligent in other ways.” Ricky couldn’t help but laugh a little, “a lot of the supernatural is right there if you know what signs to look for. But.That’s the problem. Humans don’t know what to look for. So. It’s pretty easy for us to slip between the cracks” he vaulted a low bench to get to the other side of the shop and mimic the change they’d affected on the first two panels on a section half hidden behind a bookshelf. “Bah. That’s just you selling yourself short, draoi. It’s beyond you now. It’s accidental now. That does not mean it’ll be accidental or beyond you forever. You think I started out making boxes like this? Statues like that?” He gestured to the other side of the shop where a half-finished statue of icarus, wings melting as he fell, stood on a bench, “hours and hours and hours and hours of practice. Shitty duck after shitty duck until they became less shitty.” He stood on a bench to reach a higher portion of the wall, shifting and twisting panels until the second iteration of the design fell into place. “Mimic this on your wall. This is one of your shitty ducks. You just need to put in more hours. Don’t forget that you’re fundamentally altering the fabric of the universe. That’s gonna take some fucking practice.”

“Ricky, as much as this might amaze you, we don’t actually live within a dungeons and dragons game. Now I know that might indeed be somewhat mind blowing.” Winston laughed gently and shook their head. “I’m fucking with you, I think that you’re right. We don’t know what we’re looking for, but you guys seem to and that is where we compliment each other. But unfortunately I do think that you’re right and that this is an amalgamation of this stuff. A combination of both my magic and your magic too. Not necessarily in the most ta but it is still there.” They shrugged gently and sighed, feeling a little deflated. “I know that it is something that has to keep going, I know that it is something that is going to take time to learn, but I can see all of these amazing possibilities, I can see all of these amazing things and feats that I could be doing to help people and I can’t because I have only just found out about this.” They sometimes wished that they were like Penelope or Morgan, they both knew exactly what they were doing and how they were going to do it. Winston would give almost anything to have that kind of courage and confidence. 

“You know I really hope we’re not dead because this is a lot of sass to spend eternity with. If this was dnd I’d have some dope armor and as I currently don’t have dope armor I’m unfortunately very aware this isn’t a fun fantasy magical world.” Ricky looked at the walls, eyes following the patterns until he saw the crossroads he was looking for. Unfortunately they were nearly at the ceiling, which meant he was standing on his tiptoes on top of a workbench trying to shift the panels “you’ve got time dude. You’re 24. You’ve got years to get good and do all the amazing and helpful bits of magic you’re dreaming of. There’s no doubt in my mind that you’ll be capable of it one day.” He jumped to get the last piece in place before clambering down and moving to the other side of the workshop to do the same on another panel. “Just use them as stretch goals. Some people keep pictures of what they want to look like on the mirror. You can just keep spell descriptions.” Finishing the panel he was working on he looked around the prison, “there should just be one more mutation. Then we find out if we’re dead or not!”

“I really hope that we’re not dead because I’ve yet to fulfil my dream of actually owning dope D&D armour,” Winston quipped back in reply, “not to mention that dying in a bizarro prison box realm isn’t exactly my idea of fun.” Nervously, Winston watched Ricky stretch as they adjusted the ceiling panels and did their best to help out. Their balance was much less adept then Ricky’s so they took it much slower. But they were determined to help. “I know, I know, everyone always says that there is time for everything but inherently isn’t that a lie, there won’t be time for everything. There’ll definitely be time for new magic don’t get me wrong, but what if I don’t get to do everything I want?” It had always been a fear. They didn’t want to leave White Crest but they also knew that if they stayed forever they might miss out on some stuff. Looking around them, Winston looked for the final thing that they would have to change. “Any idea what we’re looking for?” they said as they scanned the room through their glasses. 

“I made a joke to Deidre about having cool ass armor and now I have the distinct impression it’s gonna show up at our door one day. I think she has entirely too much disposable income on her hands.” Ricky couldn’t help but grin as he looked around the room to try to figure out the last set of steps to unlock their magical prison. “Hey. This was a bizarro prison realm house but we made it a bizarro prison realm home.” Ricky let his eyes drift out of focus slightly as he wandered the room, trying not to see the details but only focus on the big picture, “well that’s just part of being alive. Not even human. Just alive and mortal. The fear that you won’t have time to do all the things you want to do, accomplish all the goals you want to accomplish. But there’s really no way to plan or prep for the great vastness of possibilities that life is. You can’t prepare for every outcome. So. I guess you just do what you can and try not to regret anything else.” His strange erratic orbit of the room stopped abruptly as he saw what he was looking for. “There!” He pushed a stack of notebooks aside and started to rearrange the pattern on one of the walls “it’s gotta be that. Do that on your wall and I’ll get the third one and that should, fingers crossed, be the final pattern.”

“Deirdre is weird, I don’t know why she would have an excess of income but she is definitely the type of person to spend an absurd amount of money on something like armour, but i think that fae cultures — which is a phrase I NEVER thought that I would say — anyway fae cultures are kind of different to ours, which is why Deirdre is y'know Deirdre.” Winston had a knot in their stomach and was far from convinced that they weren’t dead. But this was their mess to clean up and they were determined to do it. At least that way they would know about the fate of their own mortality. “There is no one that I wish I could get stuck in bizarro realms with more then you.” 

Winston was kind of curious as to what was real and what was fiction. How did you actually tell these things apart? It wasn’t like there was an encyclopedia monster book or anything. Ricky seemed to have spotted something that he thought was important and Winston was quick to follow his instructions, slotting his part of the wall into the allotted spot that Ricky had suggested. “Okay, it is in place, now we have to do the third one right?” 

“Oh thank god you know about her. It’s getting really hard to keep track of who knows who is what. But yes. If I remember stories my mom told me about them, bestowing favors upon mere mortals… like me and you… in the form of spectacular armor is right up her alley, as a fae.” He cast his gaze around the room as Winston moved and changed the wall they were near to align the patterns into what Ricky hoped was the final and correct position, “That’s the nicest thing anyone’s said to me in awhile, dude. I appreciate that. We’re bizarro prison realm buddies for… well… I sure as fuck hope not for life but for as long as it takes to get out of there.” Finding the last spot on the wall behind a bench, Ricky dragged the heavy set of shelves laboriously out of the way, fingers shaking slightly as he moved the wall into the final piece of the puzzle. As the last piece slid into place he heard, and felt in the pit of his chest, a click, and turned to see exactly what he had hoped for; a panel sliding back onto itself, revealing a button on the wall roughly where the door should have been, “That… should, and I”m really going out on a hopeful limb here, be the button to unlock this enchantment. We did everything like the box operates, and it revealed a button like the box does. So. It’s your spell dude… you wanna do the honors?”

“Honestly, I know exactly what you mean, the number of times I’ve almost ‘outted’ someone in a supernatural sense is ridiculous. And it’s not like you can act as if you know or it’s a normal thing because then all the normies will get their pitchforks and torches out and I can’t be bothered with a literal witch hunt.” Winston laughed at their own comment before continuing their train of thought. “Though I will admit that I’m hopeful for the armour, for your sake. Not that you’d ever use it. It’d be good furniture.” Winston turned and looked at Ricky before shrugging. “I mean it dude, I don’t know that there are many people that I would happily keep living with, ironically you being a seal hasn’t really changed that.” Looking as Ricky activated the next section, Winston was amazed as a panel of the wall slid backwards and revealed a button. “Well,” Winston replied swallowing nervously, “I guess here goes nothing.” They took a step forward and pressed the button on the wall, watching it compress and click into place and nervously waiting for their potential and inevitable death as the room was enveloped in a bright magic light.

“God I know exactly what you mean. I’m always just like… oh god…. Who knows what. I feel like I need a super complicated spreadsheet just to try to keep track of who knows what identity, my own included.” Ricky beamed over at his roommate, “Oh come on man. You know I would wear that shit all the time at home. Making brunch? Wearing my armor. Sorting the mail? Wearing the armor. Vacuuming? Wearing the armor.” Ricky couldn’t help but laugh at that, shaking his head, “At least with a seal man hybrid I’m not leaving fish guts around. I’ve got some human sensibilities.” Ricky would be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t shaking a little as Winston approached the button and pressed it, another blinding flash of magic he could feel in his bones filling his field of vision as he hoped the spell that bound them in the garage was unravelling. When the bright light faded he was overjoyed to see the garage back to its normal state, and the door showed the trees outside the garage, “FUCK YES!!!!” He shouted, vaulting a table and throwing the door open, “We’re not dead!! We solved the puzzle spell and we’re not fucking dead!!!!”

“I’ve just resorted to always being incredibly vague and hoping that I never say anything that needs too much explaining. It’s like living a million falsehoods all at once and not knowing which one you have to resort to next.” Winston was pleased that they weren’t the only one struggling with it. “That seems like it would be incredibly inconvenient and potentially uncomfortable to be constantly wearing a suit of armour. Especially whilst vacuuming.” They paused and shrugged. “I can deal.” Winston blinked several times at the light as it enveloped them and then as quickly as it had come it was gone. Winston stood there for a moment, dazed and confused by the entire situation. Then they realised that they had made it and for the moment were in fact very much alive. Sighing a very deep relief, Winston slumped backwards into their desk chair and grinned. “Ahaha!” they hooted with glee, “Fuck dude we actually solved it, I don’t think your puzzle box is hard enough dude.” They grinned and looked at the very mundane shoe box that they had failed to enchant, pulling their glasses off and rubbing their eyes exhaustedly. “I think I’m done with enchanting shit for today.” 

[otomeshistarlight-blog]

And so, the real questions begin! 

12:  Who would you kill? Yikes, coming right out of the gate swinging, huh? Okay, so, if I was hard pressed to actually choose someone to eliminate from the story, I’d have to go with either Mineta or Aoyama. Partially because neither of them play a big enough role to really effect the story much plot-wise and also because that would open up a spot in class 1-A for Shinso! Look, I don’t even stan Shinso like that but there is a very real problem with the entrance exam if Toru managed to pass but he couldn’t. Also I’m about 90% sure that he’d work harder/take his hero courses more seriously than Mineta and Aoyama combined! The point is that there are more deserving people other than those two who should be in those seats and thats all I’m saying.

13: Who would you like to marry? Hng, this is gonna’ be hard because I have a great harem to choose from and no one really stands out as the one among all these best boys. Endeavor is a great choice because, duh. Rich, famous and powerful. Can’t go wrong there. However, that would require him to divorce his current wife and I don’t know if thats something he’d ever do. Dabi doesn’t seem like the marriage type (not in the traditional sense, anyway) and I’m honestly pretty on the fence about how Mirio and I would even get along on a basic level despite the fact I do love him. Bakugou as he is now probably couldn’t handle a relationship let alone a marriage so that would definitely be something to look forward to in the future. Of course I’d be happy to help him grow and become a more grounded person but it would be quite the rocky road. So, that leaves Fat Gum and, truthfully, I think he might be the unexpected winner. Somehow the thought of meeting in our late twenties and promptly settling down into a routine with one another that is both comfortable and passionate just ... *sigh* it just sounds really fucking nice, kthx.

14: Date with? Uh, all of them. Thanks, but I know what I’m about.

15: Gaze at the stars with? Honestly? Dabi. I think he seems like the type to spout some introspective, existential-crisis-inducing shit and then follow it up with a goofy remark that brings you back to the moment. A spooky date to be sure, but a pleasant one nonetheless. 

16: Fave BNHA theory? I bet everyone and their mom has the same answer as me but the Dabi-is-a-Torodoki theory has me fucking shook.The exact words out of my mouth when I first heard this was a thing was “that sounds like bullshit fanwank”. But then I read what people had to say on the matter and I was like okay, okay. They actually gave this some thought. And then I read the manga and I am just completely sold. There are simply too many little hints and coincidences for me not to subscribe to theory so here we are. If it ends up not being true, I’ll probably be the one crying the loudest tbh.

17: Fave Arc in BNHA? Geez, I don’t even know. The sports festival was pretty damn good. The rescue Bakugou arc was mind blowingly explosive. The provisional license exam was fun. I really don’t think I can pick one above the rest which is a testament to Horikoshi’s storytelling abilities.

18: Stranded on an island with? My harem of course. What kind of question even is this?

19:  Fave student in Class 1-A? Bakugou. Hands down.

20: Fave student in Class 1-B? Monoma and Kendo in equal measure, I’d say.

21:  Best boy? Ugh. Stop doing this to me. Three-way tie between Bakugou, Endeavor and Fat Gum.

22: Best girl? Toga and Cammie are tied for me. 

23: Fave animal-related quirk? I don’t know why but Tora’s pliabody quirk just really tickles me. Of all the (at this point) cliche feline traits he could’ve gotten, it was the ability to contort his body in ridiculous ways and I just really gotta’ give Horikoshi credit for thinking outside the box.

24: Flaws of BNHA that you hate? Hmm. I suppose the only legitimate complaint I have is that, being serialized in Weekly Shounen Jump, it follows a very typical story line for this type of manga. That is to say, I think the culture festival arc would’ve been just fine without Gentle and La Barva making a shoehorned appearance. Let the kids be kids every once in a while. Each arc doesn’t have to feature a sudden villain attack of one kind or another because, at that point, it stops being a jarring event and its just a part of the status quo. I would’ve enjoyed this arc a lot more if it had focused on the actual festival and the students instead of spending so much time on a pair of villains that I, quite frankly, did not give a shit about. But its published in one of the most competitive magazines in Japan so putting the brakes on the action to shift to a more SOL pace isn’t really feasible and I get that. It still kind of sucks though.

25: Most fave class? If this is asking what I think it is, then class 1-A is the clear winner for obvious reasons.

26: Department/Team? Bakusquad is my favorite team. : p 

27: Fave non-hero/villain character (civilian)? Toga with Dabi as a very close second. But considering how the fandom villainizes him, I think Endeavor is also an applicable answer to this question. 

Okay, this is a lot longer than I’d anticipated so look out for part three of Otomeshi’s Shitty Opinion Corner! Coming soon!

[littlemisssquiggles]

RWBY Remarks: Did Summer kill Spring?

mrssolfjkimblee reblogged your post and added:

Ok. 1. I love this theory.

TL;DR: Vernal was the previous Spring’s daughter, Raven and Spring were friends, Spring died in a grimm attack, Raven was given power. Raven chose to give Yang back to Tai bc she couldn’t be a leader, maiden, and mother to 2 kids at once. (and then Yang will receive it upon Raven’s death, but I’m not really discussing that point)

2. I think I can one-up it. Also I developed my theory by reading this one, sooo… citation.

For some reason I was always under the impression that Raven left STRQ/Ozpin AFTER Yang was born. Going along with that theory, Spring would still have to pass off her powers to Raven, a relative stranger, upon her death. Now, despite this maiden being relatively untrained, I find it a bit hard to believe that the Branwen tribe, complete with Raven, a badass, and a maiden, not to mention the rest of the tribe, could be completely run over by grimm enough to actually kill a maiden. (perhaps with the exception of the nuckelavee, but i’d still argue the maiden wouldn’t die. Just too much power.

SO the question becomes, how could the previous Spring Maiden have died? Well, what is the one weakness we know they have? Silver Eyed Warriors.

Summer.

Now, I would hope that Summer at least mostly had a grasp on these powers, and Ozpin had sent her and a team out to bring the maiden back. If Summer didn’t have a decent handle on it, idk if Oz would have risked sending such a person in, who could obviously kill the maiden. (then again, maybe he would, maybe it was “join us or die”- kind of ruthless for the Oz we know, but he did say he made a shit ton of mistakes)

So if Summer had a handle on her powers, then in theory, only something super crazy would have made her release her powers and ultimately kill the maiden.  So far when Ruby does it, it’s been when a dear friend has been majorly injured/killed. Who else is in Oz’s faction, that has been super crazy injured?

James Ironwood. Half of his body is robot.

So, if we know that Summer and James were on a team, likely to contain other members of Oz’s faction, and team names refer to colors, who else could be on that team? Leo and Raven. Team SLJR (Soldier- referring to a soldier blue). (Qrow is not on this team bc he’s already become jaded from his bad luck)

This would put both Raven and Leo (both members of Oz’s faction who ended up leaving/betraying him) in the same location as this maiden vs. silver eyes fight (with debatable moral purpose).  

My theory is, Summer tries to convince Spring to come back, Spring starts spouting off some really good points, Raven is on the fence, especially with Oz’s moral ambiguity for this mission, and probably gets convinced by Spring, that Oz is not someone she should be following. Raven starts arguing Summer and Ironwood on Spring’s behalf. Maybe someone says something to spark physicality, but it occurs.  Spring, being untrained, starts losing her shit, Ironwood foolishly tries to take her on, and gets his ass blasted. Which freaks Summer out, and she releases her silver eyes, effectively killing Spring.

Now, the original post theorized that Vernal was Spring’s daughter. (It would make sense, right, how else would she have a name that literally means spring?) I’m all for this, super on board with the original theory that Spring wouldn’t want to curse her daughter with this, so why not this lady here, who is clearly a good fighter and has just taken her side.

We don’t know how maiden powers transfer when they aren’t being forced. I would think that it would be natural enough that Raven could cover up the fact that she just got a bunch of powers by the fact that she was so upset over the whole situation.  Raven would probably transform and fly for help, while Leo (and possibly Summer, possibly not- maybe silver eyes always knock you out) takes care of Ironwood. So she would have that time without people scrutinizing her to hide it.  

I’d think that maybe Spring had told the group that she had a daughter in a nearby village or something, so Raven would be able to slip away in all the confusion of getting James help, and go get Vernal.  Raven doesn’t return, effectively leaving her team and daughter, and eventually joins back up with her birth tribe.

Later, one of the group would probably tell Oz about the daughter, but they wouldn’t be able to get to her before Raven did, and thus, the only clue they might have had on the next Spring maiden would have slipped away.

This last thought is a bit of a stretch, and likely wouldn’t work if Vernal were Spring’s daughter, but I also desperately want Hazel’s sister to have been a maiden.  Which would emphasize Hazel’s anger with Oz. Keep in mind, Hazel never said anything about her, basically just said she was a child, and that she died, under Ozpin’s watch.  Oz is the only one who said anything about her dying on a training mission. Which could still be true, but a lie of omission.  Idk. Hazel’s sister doesn’t really work so well with the whole theory, but maybe she was a different maiden? …I want her to have been a maiden.

Squiggles Answers:

Alrighty then. Okay, firstly, thank you so much! I’m glad you loved my theory. Much appreciated m’dude!

Secondly, I love your theory. I really dig the idea of Summer Rose essentially being the one not only responsible for the death of a Maiden but also the cause of Raven’s unintentional ascent to maidenhood.

We’ve learnt thus far that a Maiden’s power is easily susceptible to that of a Silver-Eyed Warrior, not to mention the amount of harm once can inflict on them if their power is unleashed at full blast.

If Ruby unleashing, let’s say, only a portion of her power was enough to extremely incapacitate Cinder.

Then it is very much possible for a Maiden to die by the hands of a Silver Eyed Warrior.

It just has yet to be confirmed in the show.

But I do very much like this hunch of yours because not only will it make perfect sense if proven canon but it’ll also bring meaning to certain things already revealed in the show.

One of those things would be what Raven said to Ruby in Chapter 11 of Volume 5.

“...You sound just like your mother...”

 At first I figured that Raven making that kind of retort towards Ruby possibly hinted that she had a part to play in Summer’s eventual death. Maybe she still did. But now I’m also thinking the same as you now. That this retort was made because Raven remembered Summer Rose spouting the same schlick when she tried convincing either Spring to return to her training so many years ago...and/or Raven to hand over Spring.

If Spring and Raven did share a friendship like we assumed, then I can see Raven being unwilling to give up her friend that easily even if it was to another friend; especially if the girl didn’t want to go with said friend.

Check this out.

 What if...

Raven befriended the last Spring and was keeping her safe in her camp when Summer showed up. A fight breaks out which results in Summer accidentally using her power on the Spring Maiden. This forces Raven to take the wounded Spring and flee while Summer is left unconscious after using too much of her power. Raven tries to take Spring to where she might be able to receive medical attention (like back at the Branwen Tribe campsite). However by the time she returns to her camp, it was already too late. 

Spring succumbs to the Power of the Silver Eyes and dies tragically in Raven’s arms, leaving the power to be transferred to her as the last person she saw...the last fleeting thought in her mind (besides her beloved daughter she now left behind) before passing away.

With the now limp body of her former friend in her arms and a taste of anger and regret on her lips, Raven could do nothing but weep shamelessly; only stopping when she feels an unforeseen magical essence enter her body from the late Spring as she become the new Spring Maiden.

Reading through your theory, also got me pondering some other things.

What if...Raven and her tribe just picked up this random girl and decide to take under her wing and the two form a bond. Shortly after that, things turn Grimm when Ozpin sends Summer to Raven’s camp to retrieve said new girl who is revealed as the missing Spring Maiden upon intel that she was with them. I’d like to think that Oz would’ve probably sent Summer alone on this mission, seeing her more than capable to handle the job on her own especially since Raven was one of her teammates.

I’m not sure about Ironwood being present for that though. While I do like your explanation of an undisciplined Spring Maiden accidentally unleashing her powers and scarring Ironwood for life, that’s something I’ll need proof from the show with cause, it’s a terrific possibility but at the same time, Ironwood’s injuries could also be completely unrelated to the Maidens, not to mention the fact that he probably must’ve been handling his own affairs in Atlas at the time when Spring went missing...maybe?

 I don’t think Lionheart was present either. Of all of Ozpin’s lieutenants who could’ve accompanied Summer, Lionheart isn’t the one. I say this going on the evidence from Chapter 1 of Volume 5. Remember when Leo was giving RNJR the low-down on what became of the Spring Maiden; he was only able to provide details up to the point where she ran away. This gives me the impression that Leo only knew the details about Spring only up until the point of her disappearance, not to mention of how sincerely surprised he was to find out that she was picked up by the Branwen Tribe.

If Leo had gone with Summer to find Spring, he would’ve known already known this info.

 One other theory I wanted to play around with was the original Spring Maiden abandoning her training because she got pregnant at a very young age and left to have her baby. In nature, spring time is often a period where many animals have their young. So it would make perfect sense if a baby was Spring’s motive for disappearing because it would tie into her season.

 We both agree that Vernal is probably the daughter of the last Spring Maiden. Perhaps when Spring discovered her pregnancy, she panicked and figured giving up her training was what was best.

 At first, Lionheart and everyone figured she left because she was overwhelmed by her newfound responsibilities. But in actuality, she left for the sake of her child because she couldn’t be both a Maiden and a Mother.

Perhaps, in the beginning after the discovery of Spring being gone was first made, Ozpin and everyone had only been looking for her for almost a year when she was discovered again---enough time for her to have her baby.

Perhaps when Spring first ran away, she was later found lost somewhere and taken in by Raven. Usually a maiden’s identity is kept secret as a means of ensuring her safety, right?

So suppose Spring was first found by Raven but since Raven wasn’t informed of the true identity of Spring, she merely saw this girl as a normal person. What if...Raven found Spring when she was already pregnant and lost and took her into her care.

Cause let’s say, Spring was an orphan. Had no family nor anywhere to stay so taking pity on the young girl, Raven permits her to stay with her and her Tribe at least until she has her baby.

At first it was only meant to be a temporary thing but during her time she spent with Branwen, Raven befriended the girl and especially bonded with her following the birth of her child: a beautiful bouncing baby girl who she christened Vernal.

While I justified my reasons for Raven possibly having Yang before she left Oz’s circle in my last post, once more I find myself liking your idea of her leaving after she had Yang (which would make Yang one year older than Vernal but still at a young age where she’d be too young to comprehend her mother leaving her behind).

If Raven was already a mother herself by the time she found the pregnant Spring, she would probably be more emotionally inclined to help the poor girl given her delicate situation. After all, she knew what it was like to be a first time mother intimidated by the prospect of parenthood and childbirth. Raven probably saw a lot of herself in Spring which made it a lot easier for her to understand her situation and take her under her wing; so to speak, forming a bond.

Now this is mostly just me adding more hunches based on your theory. Most of it might not piece that well all together like my last musing or yours. Nevertheless I just wanted to share the new thoughts I had after reading your musing based on mind.

This was less about producing theories that piece things together and more so on simply just tossing out potential ideas, y’know what I mean? So forgive me if it any of it sounds like complete gibberish in the context of RWBY.

To close, I’ll answer your last point on Gretchen Rainart being a Maiden. Admittedly I could see that further justifying Hazel’s rage towards Ozpin; certainly making it a lot more convincible than just Hazel holding Ozpin accountable for something that was obviously his sister’s choice.

As Oscar so rightfully pointed out, Gretchen knew the risks of being a huntress and chose the path regardless. While her death was an unfortunate tragedy especially to those personally involved, no one was at fault because at the end of the day it was something Gretchen decided of her own free will.

I’d like to believe that there is more to Hazel’s story than what Ozpin revealed to Oscar. However, I don’t think any of it had to do with Maiden candidacy.

The only connection I can think of is if Oz once considered Gretchen as a successor to the Fall Maiden before Amber became the final choice.

Not sure what the timeline was when Gretchen attended Beacon but let’s just assume it was before Amber’s time since she was a young Maiden herself.

Perhaps Ozpin saw something special in Gretchen when they first met and had planned to pay very close attention to her development, similar to how it was for Team STQR, Team RWBY and essentially Pyrrha Nikos.

Maybe Ozpin did once consider Gretchen to Maiden-worthy but she died before she got the chance. However Ozpin’s explanation to Oscar made it sound as if Gretchen died on her very first training mission; y’know the one that he daringly sent Ruby and the entire huntsman in her year back in Volume 1.

I’d like to think that Gretchen lost her life after this on another future training mission. Otherwise, how much of an ass does Ozpin have to be to send kids on a mission that claimed the life of one of his students years ago. Sure, he can argue that it comes with the job training.

But still man...y’think he’d learn.

Then again...more mistakes than any man, woman and child comes into play.

If Gretchen attended Beacon then she would’ve been looked at as a contender to become the Fall Maiden and not Spring since Ozpin was in charge of guarding the Relic associated with the Fall Maiden. That’s my 2cents on that.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2018)

[knightofbalance-13]

The Troll Flees!

http://xenodweeb.tumblr.com/post/160575550572/knightofbalance-13-xenodweeb

“Calling the poorly written and only example of civil rights groups in the show ‘terrorists’ simply for not being total pacifists and not because they were poorly written and calling anyone who thinks they were poorly written ‘terrorists’ isn’t racist, but making a joke about me saying racist things isn’t. uwu“

Holy shit, I don’t know what I did to make you this mad at me that you resort to spouting ad hominems that would make a 12-year-old cringe, but like since you’re asking for receipts that aren’t literally what you just said.

Ah yes and I remember you saying

“I’m a pathetic little shit that can’t argue worth a crap, my dick is the size of an atom, it is illegal for me or anyone remotely sharing a genepool. I can’t spell my own name without the assistance of my mommy and daddy and I compensate by trolling everyone on the internet and spreading annoyance and mild disgust because I hate myself deep down inside and I laugh at this because I laugh at my self like the worthless piece of shit I am.” (Lie used to illistrate a point which is coming up next)

Of course I’m lying and this never happened seeing as this is our only conversation together so i must be a complete moron for thinking this would prove anything or anger anyone (This is what I am saying about you since you have the IQ of a caterpillar apparently).

@sssn-neptune-vasilias @bluepulserjaime @rwby-rants-and-theories@rwbycriticism Care to share any other reciepts receipts showing KoBby’s other racist statements? He’s asking for them so nicely. ;^)

Ah yes, call for help little troll. We all know you’re making a fool of yourself trying to act like you stand anything of a chance against me in a fair argument. 

While we’re at it, how about I bring up the fact that SSSN there directly said taht unless you do exactly as he says and put LGBT representation in shows or else he’ll harass you and bully you?

Or how about RWBY rants blocked me for daring to think that RWBY isn’t the worst written thing in the world when My Immortal, Twilight and Prayer Warriors still exist?

Or how about when RWBYcriticism tried to act like I ahrrassing him when he openly invited me to reblog him directly?

Or how about when Blusepulserjamie there called my friend a coon for not think Jaune is evil?

I can take all you, I’m willing for a boss rush.

“I posted four sentences so that mean’s I’m not mad.”

“You’re treating me like a joke so I can act as childish as I want”

???

You will shove words down my throat to seem intellectually superior, but me not taking “STOP CRITICIZING MUH SHOW!!!!!!” seriously is “not having an attention span?” Eat shit, Green KoBlin.

I made four sentences. Four. That is taking too long huh? So you have teh attention span of a fruit fly. Explains why you can’t understand good writing or conceive of an argument besides “me right.”

Oh and you call me out on a taking a joke seriously…then immediately take a joke seriously. And the said part is, I knew you were trolling me so I just snarked right back. So all you did was shoot yourself in your unused genitals aiming for my head right in front of you.

So uh, how’s that fact manipulation going? Terrible I bet since you tried to misinform me on my own words.

“ How about you read that response again, except imagine Kirito from SAO Abrigded is saying it. “

Hey, uh quick question… Are you 12? Only children would think this was a clever come back.

Apparently you are because a 12 year old would say that, not realizing that I was informing you i was being snarky. Kirito From SAO Abridged was the snarkiest character I could think of. Only a 12 year old would think that was a comeback.

“ In fact, considering the fact that I was able to make a response actually addressing what you said instead of being a whiny little troll, I was doing a better job.”

“ And don’t try whining about this later: All i’m doing is treating you as you wanted. As a troll. “

And that is contradictory...how? I never said I was acting like a troll, all I said was that I was treating you as one. My method of dealing with trolls is to stuff them until they gargle to death on their own bile. Apparently that worked.

Yes, Pogs for KoBlins, making a textwall in response to a “vile cyberbully troll” is the best course of action and isn’t the exact thing they want.

Oh so you identify as such. Because I never called you that before and quotes means you are taking that from a source and this thread is the only source you have on me relating to you. That or you’re trying to aggrivate me in which case: HA!

“ Oh so calling you out on you treating your subjective opinion as absolute, undeniable fact despite it going against the general and critical consensus “

You know, for someone who whines about how autistic people deserve better representation more than LGBT+ people, you sure love to say terms like “brain dead.”

Nice self portrait, really captures your psychological defense. Now if only it were made out of shit, it’d be identical.

Yeah, all I said in THAT post was that LGBT people have it better than I do and I don’t complain so nice try there.

“ You fail arguing.”

at* :^)

At isn’t a sentence.

“ (nevermind said fictional group is considered terrorists by members of the same race) “

Ah yes… People of the same race… Of the fictional group… of the fictional world… That was written… And could have been written differently… Because they’re fictional.

Okay then, not good enough. The KKK is considered terrorists and bullies and horrible people even by other white people. The Black Panthers at their lowest are basically disowned by black people and, moving away from race, my LGBT friends hate RWDE arguing for LGBT characters more than I do;

“No, you see, I was actually INTENTIONALLY acting like the ass I’ve always been because I was actually the REAL troll. The textwall I made? It’s actually bait to fool you into thinking I was feeding you. Because it’s only not serious when it suits my needs. Doesn’t that troggle your bloggles????”

SO sad that the only points you can actually argue against are the oens in your five celled brain and even then you suck at it.

And what do I have to do? Label what I say as sarcasm? Tried that, you people ignored it.

Holy shit, you really do think you’re this Sherlock Holmes of the fandom and RWDE’s this group of Moriarties, don’t you?

Well you’re not. You’re simply a roach to us that simply won’t die. If simply criticizing Miles senpai is oppressing him to you, then you do you, but in reality you’re just as much of an obsessed, bottomfeeding maggot as Digital Homicide was, and god knows how much their tantrum helped them.

One day, you’ll realize this, and you’ll learn that I am the Jim Motherfucking Sterling son in this argument.

And in that day, you will thank god for me.

Then why did you delete the original post? Why run away if you’re Jim Sterling? Why censor and manipulate and lie and cheat and act just like Digital homicide?

Welp, because you are just like them. And this post will forever exist as your shame.

[idealisticrealism]

Blindspot 2x12 recap

(Aka the one where Roman gets to go on an outing, the show rights a bunch of wrongs, and Weller develops new fantasies regarding Jane and motorbikes)

So this is the first episode I’ve been able to/have chosen to watch live since seeing the pilot at Comic Con-- thanks to the triple miracles of live online streaming, a deserted office in a currently unused part of the hospital, and a rare patient-free afternoon-- and man am I so glad I did. Lbr I rode the high from this ep for the rest of the damn day (okay, week) lol.

Which, naturally, means that there is a ridiculous amount of flailing waiting below the cut. Enjoy.

So Weller seems to be regretting his boss-role rn as he is badgered by an assistant lol-- one named either Brianna or Rihanna (seriously Weller you need to enunciate more clearly sometimes), which is a fact that apparently either Weller briefly forgot, or Sully did, since there was just a fraction of a pause before he said her name haha. And okay Weller I know you are sad about the whole bye-bye baby thing (goddammit now I have Bay City Rollers in my head), but seriously, someone in your position should NOT be signing anything without reading it first! Like, who is this ‘new analyst’, who is being tested for drugs, who is getting security credentials for the deputies committee, and exactly what's in the departmental budget?? What if the ‘budget’ you just signed cuts all the funding to the Sandstorm taskforce? Or if any of the security passes you just approved are going to Sandstorm moles?? Dude. As a sidenote, though, I like Weller's signature, and it entertains me because its style is literally exactly the same as Sully's signature. Which is hardly surprising, obviously, but cute all the same. Man we really need them to get a new Assistant Director though-- Weller never seems happy behind a desk, as demonstrated by the fact he literally ran when he got the message from Patterson lol. The boy needs to be out in the field, needs to be running free with a gun in his hand and his wifey beside him, saving the world

Loolllll I love Zapata teasing Reade about his hookup last night. He tries to act all affronted and reminds her that the girl has a name, only for it to immediately backfire when she challenges him to tell her what it is because he doesn't know either. Oh, you really backed yourself right into that corner, buddy. And then in very sibling-esque fashion he's just like 'argh I don’t have a comeback to that so just leave me alone alright' lol. And omg speaking of siblings, Jane is proudly telling everyone how Roman solved the leopard tattoo, while Patterson mutters little corrections from the background, a tiny bit put out that Roman is getting all the credit for her discovery and analysis. Shhh, it's okay, baby. They all know you're the smartest one in the room, not to mention that you've cracked like 90% of the tattoos. Let Jane have her moment of being a doting big sister haha. But anyhow Patterson still has the kicker-- not only does the tattoo point to the biker gang (okay so we call them 'bikies' in Australia, so you have no idea how hard I have to concentrate to type ‘biker gang’ each time) but anyway it actually revolved around a government agent that was running guns over the border for them, and he was already caught just before the tattooing happened, which could be why Sandstorm scrapped the leopard tattoo. Jane is all for using the photo of the biker girl to help jog Roman's memory, whereas Nas (and her pet shrink) are against triggering any more memories on the belief that it will also trigger his 'antisocial behaviour'. Hey does anyone remember that scene in the movie iRobot, where Will Smith sneezes and apologises for being allergic to bullshit? I wanna put him in a room with Nas and her shrink and watch him dissolve into a marathon of constant sneezing fits every time either of them opens their mouth. But hey, maybe they're actually totally right, like remember how Jane's memory of shooting a nun made her go on a killing spree in every church she could find? Oh, wait... 

But anyhow, thankfully Weller is seeing a bit more sense this week, and immediately backs up his wifey, leading he, Nas and Jane to stand in the next room and watch as the shrink prompts Roman with the photo. I have to say, using the motorbike sounds was a good move, and clearly it worked. I'm excited to see him having real memories of his adult life, especially ones that could give us more clues to Sandstorm’s plans. And in the memory, Kat's teasing concern about him driving over potholes definitely implies that he's transporting explosives. But then again, this is Sandstorm, and they collect explosives like birds collect shiny things, so it’s hardly a revelation. And ughhh Weller and Jane share a meaningful look (with Nas again forgotten in the background, my second-favourite way for her to be, the first being absent altogether) and then Roman looks to Jane, who gives him an approving smile and a nod and my baBY SmiLES baCK and ugh just look at this puppy. Look at him. He's adorable and we need to keep him, even if he used to bite people and chew everything and pee on the rug. We'll train him up and he will be a Good Boy, I swear. 

So with this fresh intel, the team reconvenes in the meeting room, and tbh despite Weller being the one standing at the end of the table, Jane is totally the one running this show, and he's literally just watching her in rapt attention haha. And as she poses the theory that the tattoo was removed by Sandstorm because it might link too closely back to them, everyone actually listens, with not even a skeptical glance from Reade of a snarky comment from Zapata. Jane might not be entirely forgiven yet, but she's finally no longer a scapegoat, and I LOVE IT. And you know who has noticed this change too? Nas. She's definitely seeing the old team start to knit back together, and in particular the old partnership reforming between Weller and Jane, and she knows it doesn't bode well for her. Damn straight, lady. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it. (Or, as you do with everything else, just pretend to and then lie about it). But anyway here comes the real kicker of the ep-- the biker gang is notorious for never snitching, which means they need someone on the inside, and I love how straightforward and 'in the box' the team's thinking can sometimes be, because the moment Jane suggests sending Roman in, they're all like "whaaaaaaa????" as if that option had never even had the possibility of occurring to them. Like yes, fair enough he's kinda a 'prisoner of war' at the moment, but he's also their only current choice, so...? But ugh, I love that even though Weller is taken aback by her suggestion, he lets her make her case, his eyes never leaving hers even for a second. (Be still my bruised little shipper heart.) And then they seemingly get the shrink to come in to give her opinion, and I like that Weller is now sitting down at the table rather than standing like before, as if putting them all on even ground. Everyone gets a chance to have input. And then ugh: "He's a terrorist"//"So was I". Wow, Jane, that's a big statement. Just look at my baby taking responsibility for what her past self has done, even if she is now a completely different person and would never do the things Remi did. And lil Patterson next to her raises the point that they didn't know that she was a terrorist, and I love that after she says this, she keeps her eyes locked with Jane's even as Nas is saying her piece (lbr Nas isn't worth her attention anyway) but ugh I just love how expressive that look is? Is she thinking about Borden, and how they never knew HE was a terrorist? Or is it a look of apology, like 'I'm sorry we considered you a terrorist for a while', or both, or...? Honestly I really want to see more of the relationship between these two, especially if it involves seeing Jane supporting Patterson in her grief/betrayal over Borden. But anyway Nas raises the point that they know nothing about Roman's past interactions with the gang, so they'd essentially be going in there blind, and the shrink chimes in that in that setting he might suddenly lash out and become violent. God, she sounds like a broken record. And then when Jane says she can keep him in line because of their relationship, the shrink insists (after spending literally like 15 mins total with him) that he is completely incapable of love or human connection and therefore Jane won't be able to handle him. Geeeezzzz, lady, if anyone with any psych training overheard you spouting this crap, you'd probably get deregistered. Psychology might not be an ‘exact’ science but that still doesn't mean you can just make up whatever shit you want!!! Ugh. But anyway, what's this???? My son has finally found both his common sense and his spine, and firmly states that they need to do whatever it takes to stop Phase 2, and that includes taking this chance on Roman. Which basically just translates to "I trust my wifey so now you all better as well". Nas looks understandably bummed at this, because clearly she's watching the tight leash she had on Weller fray and snap, and she knows she'll never reel him back in again. Whereas my precious Jane can barely believe her ears-- she's so used to all her ideas and suggestions being ignored or smacked down, and her feelings disregarded, but not anymore. All that's changing now that Weller's head has been freed from his ass, and I absolutely love the resigned looks from all the others like 'oh we're back to this then, the Weller and Jane show" lol (but for real hallelujah)

Nawww Roman, so desperate to get out but then asking uncertainly if she's sure that letting him out is actually a good idea.  And ugh she's so supportive and encouraging and assures him that she trusts him when he's worried that he'll hurt people. See that concern for the well-being of others?? That alone literally DISQUALIFIES him for a diagnosis of Antisocial Personality Disorder. Ugh. I literally want to find the biggest psych textbook I can find, open it to the page on APD, and then throw it at the shrink's face. But anyway omg-- this moment in the bullpen. I can’t. The team’s all right there; Patterson slowly pacing with an ‘I don't know if this is a good ideaaaa...’ expression on her face, Reade with his hand shoved in his pockets and a ‘This is totally a bad idea’ expression (and Zapata doing pretty much the same, except with arms crossed), and Nas standing off to the side fidgeting with her phone and looking vaguely guilty. Although lbr that's probably just her shadiness manifesting physically, so meh. But then there's freakin' Weller standing there in his nice suit looking like he's doing a practice run for when he's at the altar and Roman walks Jane down the aisle toward him. I literally cannot deal rn. And ugh then Jane gently guides Roman through the bullpen, reassuring him that though he may not have many supporters among the FBI right now, she will always support him. And lbr she knows what it's like to walk through this bullpen and have everyone eyeing you with dislike and distrust. But she was able to rise above it and earn her place back, and Roman will earn his. But aaaahhhhh Weller greets him by name and thanks (!!) him for helping them and ugh I'm really emotional about it. Though lbr he's gotta be on his best behaviour, I mean this is his future brother-in-law, after all. Patterson follows his polite lead, though is clearly uncomfortable. But I'm actually impressed with how the team rallies, putting aside their discomfort and getting down to business. (Gotta defeat those Huns). But come on, guys, don't give those looks when he mentions a gun. Literally anyone would be wanting to know if they're going to have any protection when walking in to a possible deathtrap. Of course, Jane smoothly handles the situation, throwing a brief look of gratitude at Weller as she leads Roman out to get some clothes. A look which Nas definitely doesn't miss, nor does she miss the way Weller himself watches the siblings walk away.... 

Speaking of this brother-sister team, damn are they looking both badass and fine as they walk into the bar. And ugh Jane is so supportive of him. Which is kinda the opposite of Remi, apparently, who is being pretty damn harsh to him in this memory while she unpacks a whole heap of C4. (Good thing New Roman knows that Jane was wiped too, and is nothing like his sister used to be!). But oh boy, this memory has just taught us that Roman and Kat were a lot more than strangers. Which is kinda sweet, but definitely not good for them right now. His "We have a problem" is so cute haha. And then Kat (who is stunning, by the way, good taste Roman) comes over and punches him in the face. And well, at least we know he doesn't immediately flip into violent mode when attacked? Also tbh he's actually doing a really good job at being out in the field, reading the situation and thinking on his feet just like Jane does. I feel so proud. And now they've managed to score a meeting with the big boss-- who we know is Bad and Dangerous bc he's beating the crap out of some guy the moment we meet him. Also Jane said earlier she'd have a gun on her but the dudes didn't say anything when they searched her-- did they just take it, or did she not have one? Idk I'm just curious. But ugh then my babies cleverly construct a story using just enough truth to be believable, giving an excuse for both his absence and any future 'unusual' behaviour. Then they broker a deal where if the bikers set up a sale and draw Shepherd out, the gang will get to keep both the money and the fancy explosives that Shepherd apparently wants. And ugh I'm so proud of my baby Roman, bluffing that he knows where to get the explosives and agreeing to the bikers coming along to steal it. My puppy is doing so well. And then just to remind us again how Scary this biker dude is, he shoots the unconscious form of the dude he's been beating. Better keep working on those poker faces, guys, because I saw the utter empathy from both of you just then ugh

Back at the lab, the team is chastising Roman for doing things the way he did, and while I'm kinda like ‘leave him alone guys he did his best’, I do appreciate that one of their main arguments is that he could have gotten Jane killed. Because they CARE. They don't want to see anything happen to her because she's one of them and I'm so emotional about it. Anyway Zapata raises a very good point, one that I've been waiting for someone to mention-- basically that Shepherd herself probably won't show for the sale anyway, but Weller points out that capturing any Sandstorm operative would be a huge help to them. I like that Roman is kind of excluded from that category, and I know it's pretty much only bc he has no memories of it, but still. And then Patterson makes it clear that the only way to get this military-grade explosive is to steal it, and Nas is all ‘meh so they'll steal it’ and walks out to start some shady dealings, and pretty much everyone stares after her like she's just grown another head. Are you really surprised, guys?? Nas doesn't exactly give a shit about doing things by the rules... rules other than her own, anyway. And then Patterson and Zapata are all 'we can't give real explosives to a biker gang and a terrorist group' but Weller knows Jane's right when she says they’ll test whatever they do get and won’t react well to fakes, so they need to use the real stuff.

Reade admits to Zapata about Freddy's ex and how both of them were feeling guilty, and as usual she immediately defends what he did and tries to convince him to let it go, bc she knows that if he’s not careful, he'll let his guilt grow into a self-destructiveness that could have huge consequences. And speaking of that kind of guilt, Patterson approaches Nas about wanting to be present for the Sandstorm trap, and her guilt over Borden and ughhhh my baby is hurting so much (damn you Borden!!!) but it's interesting how her words kind of describe the S1 Weller/Jane situation a tiny bit (Weller's feelings for Jane clouding his judgement, blinding him to reality, and vice versa) and apparently also describe Nas's experience at the NSA. So the Sandstorm mole in her department was her lover? Interesting. I wonder if the shrink worked with her there too, and that's how she got her injury? But anyway yaaaasss Patterson getting (rightfully) angry at Nas for being blind to Borden's betrayal bc she was too busy spying on the rest of them-- finally someone calls her on it! You go, Patterson. 

Oooooh I am so here for Weller calling Jane aside, his hand lingering unnecessarily at her back as he draws her away from Roman, the sad-hearteyes fixed on her as he tells her to be careful, not to let her guard down around Roman. And then ugh "I know you want Roman to be something different, but you have to treat him like any dangerous asset, the same way I treated you when I found out who you were". Ugh, I love the implication here that he didn't really want to treat her like he did, but treated her how he felt he had to. (After she came back, I mean. That night he arrested her he wasn't really thinking through his actions at all). And then ugh she calls him Kurt and insists that Roman wouldn't hurt her and that he is capable of love and I love how balanced their exchanges are now? They're totally on the same level, no bitterness or pain between them. Just two people who know each other as well as they know themselves. And aaahhh Weller is honest about his concerns that Roman is manipulating her and manipulated Kat, too, the way ‘she manipulated Jeffrey Cantor’, aka using his feelings for her to get what she wanted. I LOVE that he knows that wasn't the case with him. Everything between them was real, he knows that now. But ugh I love the look Roman throws at Weller as he and Jane get in the elevator. Lbr, he knows Weller is in love with her-- he doesn't need his memories to know that, not when it’s written all over Weller’s face.

Nawww Roman telling the bikers the plan and answering all their questions so confidently and ugh I am so proud of my lil puppy. Also lol I love the fact that Mr Scary Biker Man is scared of Shepherd. And then aaahhh they all head off and Kat rides with Roman, and "How come you never came back for me?"//"You ever came looking". Damn, boy, you're smooth! Also uh oh she just gave him a gun, hope he won't need to use it... but duuuuude this whole bike-to-truck thing is crazy! How did he know he'd even be able to do that??? I can't believe he didn't lose his balance and splat on the road lol. And then omg the drivers are Weller and Reade????? Oh geeeezzzzz this can't go well. Jane doesn't look surprised at all to see them, though, so I'm guessing it was part of the plan? And so the bikers now have the explosives, but in a shocking-- lbr not all that shocking-- twist, Roman now has to kill Weller and Reade. Sigh guys, are you really telling me you didn't think this miiiight happen if you were witnesses to this whole thing? The two of them look shocked, but that just might be their acting (nice work boys) whereas Jane's pokerface definitely slips into genuine fear for them both, before she quickly covers and tries to talk the bikers out of it without making it too obvious that she's trying to protect them. But my puppy Roman knows that if he doesn't kill them, the bikers will kill all four of them, so he takes a chance, the only one that will ensure his sister survives and hopefully that he and Weller and Reade do as well. I'd like to think that he noticed their puffy-looking jackets and realised that they had vests on underneath, but maybe it was just a solid guess. And ugh I just want to hug my baby Jane, because while she doesn't make a sound I can practically see the anguished scream echoing behind her eyes as the two of them fall to the ground. In that moment, she thinks she's lost both the man she loves and a man who's like family to her, plus she thinks that it's her fault and that she was wrong about Roman, and is now still in danger of losing her own life, and on top of that, will be shunned by the rest of her FBI family. Basically, if that moment had been real, Jane would have literally just lost everything. Ugh, can we give her a hug yet? She's still staring at Weller's body when Roman grabs her and pulls her away, and I bet he didn't miss the way she flinched when he touched her. Ugh my baby, it's all okay, he would never hurt your family unless he had no choice, he's just doing what he has to do to protect you! Ngl tho, when he first shot them I was like WHAT!?!?? and then my immediate thought was ‘maybe blanks??’ and then I was like wait no that's not possible bc it was a real gun and then honestly my brain was still freaking out by the time they started picking themselves off the floor and then I was finally like ohhhh rigggghhttt, vests exist haha. I love Reade's "He knew we were wearing vests, right??" Yeah just go with that, Reade, because that's probably the more comforting option. Oooooohh but now Jane is super pissed at Roman, but she can't deny the sense in his words when he said that it was better to risk shooting them in the vest than hesitating too long and having all four of them get shot in the head. Apparently their little ruse worked, too, because the bikers have set up a meeting with Shepherd for later that night. Kat pulls Roman away for a second, and ugh he's sweet with her and honestly even though I'm super hopeful (aka trash) for Roman/Zapata, I'm really kinda shipping these two rn. Like they clearly really cared about each other?? I love seeing more Roman backstory. I wonder what happened that morning that he was supposed to come meet her? Did Remi stop him, or Shepherd? 

They’re back at the FBI now and tbh I’m bummed that we didn’t get to see the scene where Jane and Roman arrive and see Weller and Reade alive and (mostly) unharmed. Is someone gonna fic it, or?? (Please don’t make me do it lol). But anyway aww Jane takes Roman back to his cell, and she knows that he remembered something, and oohhh there's a little bit of tension between them bc he's still got the memory of Remi's treatment of him in his head, plus he feels like the team is still viewing him as the enemy. "You still trust me, right?" Ugh. I really hope he believes that she's being honest when she says yes...

Lol Weller sitting at his desk in a shirt with two bulletholes in it. And ugh Jane watches him through the glass for a second and it's clear she's so guilty that he got hurt and worried that he'll be angry at her or Roman for it and ughhh she's so apologetic as she comes in and then ugh "I'm so thankful that you’re both okay-- when he shot you, I thought--" SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD. SHE THOUGHT SHE'D JUST LOST THE MAN SHE LOVES. HELP ME. But thankfully he instantly assures her that Roman made the right call, and that must also be a relief, knowing that her brother wasn't going to face a lynchmob for kinda gambling with their lives. But ugh then the ever-perceptive Jane (who also is just very attuned to Weller, lbr) asks if something else is going on, bc she can tell there's something upsetting him. And for a moment he brushes it off just like he would have earlier this season, and in that time she's learned to obey the dismissal when it's given, so she’s about to leave but then (hallelujah) Weller gives in and confides in her like he used to, admitting that Allie's moving to Colorado. And ughhhh you can see the instant panic and distress in Jane's eyes as she stumbles through asking him whether he's going too, because no no no no please no-- and then ugh the way she lets out a tiny relieved  breath when he says he's staying. She was seriously terrified for a second there that he was going to leave and she'd never see him again. And then as he admits that his place sudenly feels really empty now that there's not gonna be a baby in it, the Jane hearteyes come out, and ugh honestly I think I love them even more than the Weller hearteyes. They're very different, more of a 'I know you will never be mine but I love you with everything that I am and I always will and I would sell my soul in a heartbeat if it meant you would be happy'. UGHHHH SHE JUST LOVES HIM SO MUCH. SO FREAKIN MUUUUUCHHHHH. And she's halfway through saying something sweet and genuine to comfort him and suddenly Zapata's interrupting (what, were Patterson and Nas too busy to perform their usual interrupting duties???) and so now the Feels wil have to wait bc the sting is onnn

Is it just me or is Weller looking very tense?? You know, almost like the woman he loves is walking straight into a potentially deadly situation?? Oh wait... But lol lbr he'd be in there in a heartbeat if there was any sign of anything going wrong. You can bet that he placed himself and Reade-- aka the two big tough men-- at the position closest to be able to get in there and provide help quickly, while Nas and Zapata are sentries around the back or whatever. I'm pleased that there has been very little Nas/Weller teaming up lately, and this time there's not even the potential explanation of Zapata and Reade avoiding each other to account for this split, bc they're all cool now. Maybe it’s because the use that Weller and Nas had for each other has passed... But anyway oh boy, this deserted bar is not a good sign for the amnesiac siblings. And Kat looks piiiissed, even more so when she raises a gun. Ooooh boy the jig really is up. Kat knows Roman's off, apparently because he didn't want to shoot the guys earlier, and because he held her hand. Idk about you, lady, but that kinda seems like an improvement overall?? And Jane agrees: "He's different now, ever since he got shot. He's better." Ugh but that little look Roman gives her when she says it-- I mean, it's kind of praise but also not? Like a 'yay she likes who I am but wow how little did she think of me before?' kinda thing? And then Roman spills the beans about the FBI while Jane is there beside him like 'oh shit', and meanwhile outside Nas is saying they need to go in now-- but Weller (rightly) waves her off without even a moment's pause because "Jane knows what she's doing". Hell yeah, look at all that beautiful support from hubby. And lol devil lady don't think I didn't see that expression on your face. Your witchy words used to have power over Weller, but not anymore. Jane is his talisman, and his love for her not only makes him better in every way, it makes him immune to you as well. To quote King Theoden: You have no power here! lol. But anyway as we're watching the inexorable crumbling of one pairing (I refuse to say 'ship' in regards to them bc imo they don’t qualify) we’re watching another one teeter on the edge-- Roman is all puppy-eyed and spouting ‘I love yous’ and Kat is wavering in her determination to kill them, and Jane is basically in the background trying to be as unobtrusive as possible bc she knows even one wrong look could get them both shot and god I hope she’s picturing Weller in that moment and hoping that she’ll one day get to tell him how she feels and then the scene switches to the other room and BAM there's the gunshots and lol I love all the biker dudes just chillin' and sipping their beer. And then aaaaaah Kat comes out and turns on her own gang for Roman and ughhhhhh I feel like this means things are about to go really badly for her. Ugh, the poor girl. Seems like this show really has a theme about suffering for the ones we love. Anyway lol at the mayhem twins being sprawled over various bits of furniture, like good work guys you're so convincing haha. And then omg they're fighting the guys (lucky only two came in) and I don't think I appreciated this the first time round (literally how do you people deal with watching live?? And only once?? I'm constantly pausing and rewinding when I watch) but anyway Jane pulls a flag off the wall and then uses it as a weapon against her opponent??? Like damn, that was badass. And then Kat literally kills a guy that she's probably known for years to prevent him from going in to join the fight??? Dude. Of course Weller sees the gunfire from outside and is immediately into his MUST SAVE WIFEY mode. Have to say though, said wifey is doing just fine at taking care of herself-- and of her brother-- given that she literally just smashed a chair over a guy to protect an incapacitated Roman. PROTECTIVE SIBLINGS UGHHHHH. But nooooo Kat's been shot (told you she would suffer for loooovee) and Roman doesn’t even notice the presence of the final shooter as he runs to her side-- but thankfully bro-in-law is not about to let anything happen to his wifey's favourite brother, and bursts in and takes the guy out before he can shoot Roman. Jane's in the room seconds later, locking eyes with hubby over the barrels of their guns (well, at least they've got protection for all that intense eye-sexing) and ugh my baby Roman is reassuring Kat and idc if he feels like a fraud, I'm glad she died believing he loved her. And tbh I don't think he was as unaffected as his abrupt turnaround made him seem. I like that he immediately hands off his gun to Weller, and Weller just accepts his determination to get the job done and rolls with it while Jane is still mentally (or rather, emotionally) catching up. Ugh, this trio is going to be the death of me, I just know it.

As they race to the meet point, the invaluable Patterson gives Weller the lowdown while Jane stares at Roman, and then as soon as there's a quiet moment, she checks if he's okay-- with Weller intently listening in. Honestly no one can see how much Jane cares about Roman without instantly becoming a little bit more smitten with her, so it must wreak havoc on Weller’s already Jane-owned heart lol.  Roman then mentions his need to ask Shepherd why she erased his memory, leading to some intense Jeller eye contact in the rear-view. I love that it's not like a guilty glance between co-conspirators; it's more her saying 'I hate that I did this thing and I can't get through it without your support' and him being like 'I know you did this thing because I asked you to and I promise I won't let you carry the weight alone'. Literally no one can convince me it was otherwise lol. Anyway the whole FBI team arrives at the meet point-- SWAT guys and all-- but do we all notice who is front and center, making the calls? Weller... and Jane. Zapata, Reade, and Nas are all a couple of steps back, and the Mere Mortals are even further behind them. And then when everyone fans out, Nas is with Jeller, but still stuck behind as they move together, side by side. As they flank the door, they realise simultaneously that it hasn't been opened in years, and then-- dun dun dun-- they discover that they're too late and Sandstorm has already been and gone, taking the explosive and leaving all the dead bikers. If this ain’t a ‘well, shit’ moment, idk what is lol

Back at the lab, the team is not having a happy time, but I am very much enjoying watching frustrated Weller in his bullet-riddled shirt (dear god please keep the shirt for posterity reasons. Bring it out on holidays/family occasions when you and Roman are arguing about which football team is better or something and be all like "Remember when you shot me?? You don't get to have an opinion!" lol) I mean idk, I'm just really attached to this shirt. I'm sentimental about things like that... bullet riddled shirts, Jane-sized duffelbags, etc... But anyway, damn, Jane is leaning against some pillar thing and even in her dejected state she still looks damn good. Though I do prefer her more natural look, she has really been rocking the dark lipstick and all-black/leather outfit. Damn. But anyhow now the team is debating how Sandstorm could be staying one step ahead of them, and lol literally everyone in the team gets to have input (Patterson's being particularly sad, about how she sweeps for bugs every morning and that maybe there's another mole in the NYO) and then it finally gets to Nas' turn and Weller just totally cuts her off before she even gets three words out. Heheheh that's right, Lady Wormtongue doesn't deserve to have an opinion. And then when she eventually gets to speak-- telling them all that they'll get the explosives back and somehow find Sandstorm, she gets nothing but chilly silence haha. Yaaaassss team. FREEZE HER OUT. DO IT.

Oooooh Mr Grumpy has headed to his office for some Serious Brooding Time (there's even teeth-gnashing and furniture-abusing involved) and we all cross our fingers, hoping for Jane to appear and soothe him as only she can... aaaand instead Nas appears. Boooooo. We’re treated to some insincere apologies and a flimsy explanation of them clouding each others' judgement, and lol I love that she thinks he used the HMX as bait bc she asked him to. Oh, honey, I thought you were supposed to be perceptive??? Literally everyone could see he did that for Jane, just as he let Roman out in the field for Jane. He's back on Jane's side now, and let’s be real now, you know it. Which means you know that being in a relationship* (*term used very lightly) with him is no longer of use to you, because it is no longer an effective means of controlling him. Don't even try to deny that you created this entanglement solely to prevent him getting re-involved with Jane (and also probably to get some good sex out of the deal, lbr here) and now that it is completely failing in its original purpose, you're cutting ties. That's just smart resources management, and you’re nothing if not methodical. But oh man I’m getting a good chuckle out of the line "we have feelings for each other, of course we do". Mmmmm-hmmm. That was so convincing. But loooollll Weller's like 'So that's it then' and literally does nothing to fight it, doesn't offer up any argument, actually almost looks pleased?? Lbr I would have rathered Weller be the one to break things off but this way works for me just fine, bc it's clear that he broke things off emotionally (if they ever even existed emotionally) quite some time ago... 

Aaaaand speaking of nonsensical and emotionless pairings, Reade-- who just happens to have his damn fine chest on display at this moment-- has an unexpected visitor. Freddy's ex (do we have a name for her yet? Calling her Freddy's ex makes me uncomfortable) comes in, while valiantly keeping her eyes up top. Well, mostly. Dw girl, no one is perfect. But anyhow as she cries about being afraid Freddy is dead and having contributed to it, Reade tells half-truths and tries to assuage his own guilt by reassuring her. Following which she becomes VERY concerned with the state of his chest, fussing over bruises that tbh could just be very determined hickeys. But then she touches the ~bare chest~ and seals the Coital Prophecy-- you know, the one where two characters (generally) of opposite genders, regardless of actual connection to one another, become powerless to resist getting it on after one of them touches the other in an area usually covered by clothes? But well, there's just no going back now, because he basically told her ‘you're not a nuisance’ and we all know that's actually code for ‘why aren't we already naked’. But for real dude, I hope you washed your sheets after last night's romp with bar girl... and don't forget that little talk we had about protection! Safety first!!! (please I can’t handle any more baby drama)

Thankfully the next scene is already 50000000x more enjoyable, and so far all it involves is Jane standing in a doorway. I am very supportive of this, and of literally anything she does. And then ugh she goes and joins Roman on the floor, and he instantly admits that he lied to Kat about being in love with her, and seems dejected at the thought that he might never have really felt anything for her and asks what's wrong with him. Oh, honey. A person without empathy or emotions would never even think to ask those questions in the first place, or be worried about the answers. And Jane, speaking from experience, tells him that feelings can't just appear like memories; they have to develop. And may I just send a big kudos to whichever brilliant person in the sound-editing department put a tiny snippet of the Jeller theme in there at that moment?? Bless you, you subtle geniuses. This conversation also says a lot about her relationship with the team vs her 'relationship' with Oscar (which I still believe was devoid of any feelings other than Jane needing to get comfort from SOMEWHERE while also needing to get info out of Oscar. Two birds, one stone, so they say). But oh man am I so relieved that Roman actually tells her that Remi was the reason he and Kat were separated, because it gives her a chance to show that she's not like Remi-- she doesn't want the same things for him that Remi did, and she is constantly trying to make up for the things that Remi is responsible for. Much like he will have to make up for what Old Roman did. And then ughhhhh she tells him not to stay fixated on who he was, but to try to embrace who he is now-- and ugh it literally seems like she's telling him what she wishes she could go back and tell herself the night she met Oscar. Chasing the past nearly cost her her future, and now that she's getting another chance at it, she's not going to let anything stop her. And ugh she promises to get him out and tells him she really believes he loved Kat and ughhh my babies I love you both so much

Damn, dark-side Borden is still pressing my buttons. I can’t help it! But anyway I’m intrigued by this increasing screen-time for this Parker guy-- who tells Borden he's there to see this country burn, aka just basically regurgitating Sandstorm's tagline-- it makes me wonder if he's actually not all he seems? Maybe he has managed to infiltrate Sandstorm (anyone notice that their name shortens to SS??) in a way Jane wasn't able to, and is secretly working against them. Either way, I'm intrigued to see what his future role will be. I'm also appreciative that he and Borden are filling in the scenes that would otherwise require Shepherd in them. Any ep that I don’t have to look at her face is a good one imo

AaaaaaaahhhhhHHHHH. I'd already seen the spoiler pics before watching this ep; had already been waiting all episode for Jane to show up at Weller's door. But for a moment when he opens it, I’m still struggling to believe it’s really happening. Jeller. Happily hanging out, alone, after work hours. Oh how I have missed this dynamic. But lbr even before we see Jane's face, we know it's her at the door, because his eyes go from surprise to HEARTS HEARTS HEARTS in like 0.00001 of a second lol. And Jane's leaning there, looking all casual, acting like her heart isn't racing and stomach isn't swirling with butterflies over the fact that it's been a long time since they had this kind of interaction and she can't be sure she's allowed to step into this territory (both figurative and literal) again and ugh just think how much guts it would have to take to reach out like this when he'd rejected her or frozen her out so many times since she'd been back?? But lbr she's always been pretty in tune with this thing between then and she can tell, now, that it's different again, that it's back to how it used to be. Or maybe even better than it was then, because there's no 'Taylor' in her that's making the focus of his affections unclear. And of course, the Assistant Director of the Jane Fanclub (the director being me, obviously) would never dream of turning her away, not anymore or ever again, and he's showering her with those heart eyes while she shyly finishes her sentence from their conversation hours ago-- because she's precious and adorable and wants to support him and reassure him ughhhh-- and then ugh in literally one of the bravest acts we've seen her do (and lbr ‘Brave’ is practically Jane's middle name) she brings him his favourite beers-- which she would have OBVIOUSLY have had to go out and buy for THIS VERY SPECIFIC PURPOSE, since it's not like New Yorkers have Pennsylvanian beer just lying around-- and ughhhh this is the best olive branch (slash date-invitation??) ever and oh man I seriously need to know how long she's had those beers and how long she's been wanting to do this and aaaaahhhhh Weller must be like 'thank GOD that foolishness with Nas is over' (I know we are) and ughhh he invites her right in and omg they're finally getting to have those 'drinks' they owed each other (technically didn't he owe her? Like you said last season, you’re racking up the debt, buddy). But aaahhhhh someone save me bc they both look so HAPPY and relaxed but also a little excited and Jane's hearteyes are killing me because legit I have never seen anyone be such a literal manifestation of 'to gaze adoringly'?? I feel like she's been suppressing these heart eyes as best she could during this last two weeks since she got back from Sandstorm-- since Weller realised what a jackass he'd been and started showing her that he really does care about her-- and she just can't hold them back anymore and ugh it's so beautiful. And then ugh my big silly baby totally overplays his 'bullet wounds' (too bad he didn't have his shirt unbuttoned like Reade, eh??) leading to some sweet little flirty banter and ughhhhhh now it's his turn to gaze adoringly as she asks him to give Roman a window or let him go for a walk or something, and lbr if he could, he would do literally anything she asked just because he wants to make her happyyyyyy. I'm so glad our big stupid son finally made it back to this point. And ughhh I am so upset at these two idiots and the way they're smiling at each other all goofily while they drink their dumb beer and then OMG SHE SEES THE FILES THAT SANDSTORM HAS ON WELLER. FINALLY. I think we've literally all been yelling "WHY AREN'T YOU SHOWING THIS SHIT TO JANE?????" ever since he found out about its existence. And then they move over to the table together and she gets adorably excited to see his yearbook thing (this literally feels like looking at your boyfriend's baby photos lol) and within two seconds she has found him. Because of course she has, she's been seeing that face in both her waking life and dreams ever since she came out of the bag (and apparently long before that, in her previous life), so of course she'd know him anywhere. He’s her person. And ugh he jokes that he could have gone pro with ball and she actually giggles and then gazes up at him as he talks about the game, the heart eyes so intense that she's practically glowing with it (you know that fuzzy glow around the sun on really hot days? Yeah, picture that) and then she looks back down at the page and BAM. Shepherd is in the crowd. And Weller REMEMBERS her. And just like that, the connection between these two has given them a HUGE break in their fight against Sandstorm. (Which lbr we all knew was going to happen and was exactly why the writers never had Jane look at this stuff before now.) Also don't even get me started on the fact that he and Jane achieved together in moments what he and Nas hadn't been able to do in weeks. Symbolism, much??????? 

But anyway that's pretty much all the rambling I have for today because all the rest is just incoherent screaming about having my show and beloved characters back lol so see you next time for more Jeller perfection aaaahhhhhh

[gyromitra-esculenta]

So, upon returning home, I thought to myself, hey, the new X-Com DLC was announced, and that got me thinking in general about the X-Com series (fuck you, Terror from the Deep or whatever were you called). Especially, the cool resistance sniper looking chick.

But it all began with me looking at the trailer of the ‘War of the Chosen’ and thinking, cool, there’s the evil alien sniper, lanky full stealth alien assassin, and a big guy that seems the most reasonable out of them, and they are all purply-violet-bluish… *squints at the screen* *squints more* Holy f*ck! TEAM TALON!?! …and they all hate one another?

I started to think that the new X-Com general storyline would incorporate well into Overwatch, especially if you take into the account the fact that the new X-Coms are a reboot in a way, but you could maybe possibly make the old games into things that did happen – Alien Crisis, not Omnic Crisis.

Following stuff is deeply inaccurate lore, a bunch of headcanons and an AU. @drift-ed This is what happens when you leave me to my own devices :| This is your fault.

So, the basic premise of X-Com is just that, killing aliens. You win, and that’s it. But with the second one, the storyline goes into ‘alternate’ reality in which the Commander was captured and Earth was benevolently taken over by Advent. Which makes X-Com into a successful organization that is toppled by a single ‘surgical’ strike and in its place a new world order has risen – but things are FAR from good.

The Commander then is rescued from Advent during the first mission in X-Com 2 where he was used as a kind of ‘strategic’ commander for Advent troops, but that’s not exactly that clear. Then you have the Avatar project which supposedly was to create vessels for Ethereals (current top-of-the-food-chain aliens).

But, psych!, apparently the Commander can ‘drive’ an Avatar and at least one Avatar was operational before the end of the game.

Which is of course, in my not-so-humble opinion, a very significant thing (and me reading way too much into a hack storyline for a strategy game), because Avatars are in a way psychic powerhouses, but… that’s supposedly because Ethereals are using them as vessels. But the Commander has a full use of the Avatar’s powers and during the ending is shown doing stuff with psychic energy.

So… one. There are no psychic powers before aliens invade. And then you can only develop your units in that tree because they have a predisposition towards it and you have the alien tech to make it usable (lore-wise, I think). Or there’s even a possibility that predisposition is only there because of the aliens and some kind of contamination/experimentation.

Two. The Commander is never mentioned having psychic powers if I remember correctly, and then he uses the Avatar by a way of forced ‘synchronization’.

Three. Avatars are made from people. As in, they are genetic scrambled eggs? At least that’s how I remember that.

Four. The Bureau – and the end mission of X-Com 2. You know, in the Bureau it’s canon that Ethereal can attach to or take over a human. During the end mission, there are at least two different Ethereals talking and they sometimes say some conflicting things, which, coupled with the Commander taking advantage of the whole psychic powerhouse Avatar thing, lends to a theory that the Commander has an Ethereal attached to him.

So…

The first X-Com leading character team is a rag-tag bunch of weirdos. The second X-Com team is a rag-tag bunch of weirdos. The trailer for the new DLC shows three different additional resistance groups and hints at least at one character being a weirdo.

So. Imagine this. Overwatch, successful in repelling beginning stages of the alien invasion, is taken down by a surgical strike (haha, doesn’t look like that from the cutscene really), loses a part of its core team, including the Commander Gabriel Reyes. The New World Order arises under the benevolent rule of the Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*) and everybody loves them.

After several years the resistance made up partially by the remnants of the core Overwatch group takes out small Advent training/recruitment center in some city, and, lo and behold!, they rescue Gabriel, who, unbeknownst to them, has an Ethereal attached to him (maybe possibly). And then, having their Commander back, they start to really fight back. As much as I like keeping faithful to the thematic roles of the characters, Gabriel makes much more sense as the new Commander (even if we assume the original Commander was Jack) since X-Com now pretty much wages a guerilla war against the Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*). And Gabriel does want to wreck some shit up.

Now, the Ethereal thing is optional here, since it’s assumed the Commander doesn’t go on field missions, but then it’s really how you headcanon your troops there if you do. But, once in a month or something, there are rumors of unknown resistance group or operative that pulls something impossible, infiltrating Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*), blowing something up, and it/he starts to garner some individual attention, even is given a name: Reaper(s). And from what’s known, they are more than bordering on supernatural.

But there are also small pockets of resistance disappearing overnight without trace. Sympathizers in the cities snatched away without notice.

And then, Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*) presents their new Speaker, taking over for the one killed by the X-Com. Charismatic, white-haired, of course it’s Jack, and everybody and their grandma knows it’s a blatant trap. And Jack, as a leader of previous X-Com, is more believable for people, when spouting Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*) propaganda.

Even if it’s an obvious trap, they take the bait and prepare, which leads to an epic showdown that culminates in Ethereal on Ethereal violence and some explosions. Well, they take out the new Speaker, at least the Ethereal attached to Jack, but Jack himself couldn’t have survived, which makes it a bittersweet victory, but not an unexpected outcome.

Since then more Avatars (like 3 or 4, separately) appear, and every each one they go after is not Jack. But maybe sometimes it feels like *someone* is helping them during those missions – some other missions too.

So, the end-game. The mission itself is pretty interesting, let’s just say that it’s a suicide mission with win condition that only the Commander has to survive, every other soldier is expendable, and all Avatars must be killed. Avatars arrive through gates with alien helpers, and alien helpers also arrive by themselves (or something like that).

So the whole squad is getting pretty much pummeled, under fire from all sides, and the last gate comes online and out steps another Avatar with his helpers. So it’s just as well they have like zero chance survival with those odds, but god help them, they are going to take down the whole undersea facility with them while the Ethereals prattle on about the worse threat towards everything and stuff, only…

Welp, the last pod of aliens starts to attack their brethren and the newly arrived Avatar goes all psychic maelstrom on the closest enemy Avatar, so much in fact that you can literally see and hear the Ethereal possessing him go squish.

And Gabriel KNOWS. Fuck the humanity, he couldn’t care less at that exact moment, he’s about to get up and cross the whole distance to the other side of the chamber regardless of the barrage of fire from the both resistance and aliens, and deck that fucker that let him think he’s dead.

‘I know. Later.’ He hears Jack in his mind. So they make the last push, kill the last load-bearing Avatar, and Jack basically throws them through the collapsing gate.

And a moment later gets decked on the other side just as he steps out of the gate.

Then Team Talon comes in to recover two important Advent (*cough*Talon*cough*) assets. And apparently, they hate one another *shrugs*. I’m pretty hyped for the story side of the DLC even if I know it will be a hack storyline. STILL, BETTER LOVE STORY THAN…

Oh yeah, and freaky psychic sex with an Ethereal voyeur.

There’s a lot that could be done with xcom plot :|

And seriously, the Chosen Ones could be, like, holding a big sign with ‘we’re team talon’ on it.

[c7thetumbler]

Life Update Notes: January 7th 2017

Look at that banner! MMM. Get it? It’s like, Update notes. For like a video game. But it’s built into that heartbeat thing I like that I keep using.

So it like, a LIFE UPDATE NOTES. GET IT?!?!

You get it. You’re smart.

And while I do like to hide little easter eggs in some of my banners, the “notes” don’t directly translate to like Morse or Binary or anything like that so don’t bother trying to decode it.

So yeah, I gave up on the State of the Epic posts halfway through 2016 because of.... reasons, but given our politics recently I figured I’d take that concept out of any sort of presidential context and kinda tie it in with the themes I’ve been using for a couple years now; the sort of minimalist programmer art with green/blue accents-

Wait, you didn’t notice I’ve been using this theme for over a year? ... Have you not seen my Twitter or my Twitch or some other banners I’ve been- forget it, it’s fine.You’re fine.

Let’s get started.

Projects

This section’s gone.

“But C!” you begin to inquire with your stunned expression, having nearly averted fainting from reading some random guy’s blogpost, “This was the most important part of your posts! And didn’t you just say in that other post you did almost exactly a week ago you were gonna do a project a month? HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME! I TRUSTED YOU!”

Fear not, person whose behavior is indicative of someone who almost certainly exists, I am holding myself to that. But these projects are going to be so important that I am in fact putting them in their own post. After each week of the month, I will create a post about my project up until the day after the month ends, where I will be posting my thoughts on it and, hopefully, begin the next project, or continue expanding on the current one if it all works out. So that will be coming tomorrow!

What will instead take this place will be a rant or my opinion or outlook on something or other, keeping the in-formalities to this while the more interesting stuff to its own deal.

Let’s rant about facts and skepticism

So let’s kick off this whole deal with something very important to me. Facts. This past year was rife with headlines, news, and opinions that were spouted in the face of actual provable facts and data, and because of how modern society has streamlined everything, everyone just ate that shit up.

Now my outlook on these sorts of things, and almost everything is a healthy skepticism. That is, question claims that seem bizarre, unusual, outlandish, or contrary to things you previously looked into, but do you really have to question every mundane thing? Of course not; no one has the time for that. Now, that’s not to say don’t question the things you believe in; quite the contrary! The things you believe in should always be on your mind, and therefore be the most subject to criticism. But do you really need to start an argument with family members over how they got that flat tire? Nah. Not the point. It’s said and gone.

So basically, scrutinize things people claim. This is the rant. Right here.

You remember all those fucking lessons about making a bibliography, referencing which books and page numbers you used, and making sure you got the quotation exactly right during your 12+ years of education? There’s a reason for that; it’s how you call out bullshit. Any news site worth their salt should be citing a source that undeniably proves that what their reporting on actually happened, and then make it clear to you what parts are their opinions, if any. When a news site doesn’t do this, or even worse, cites another news article that leads to an infinite regress of bullshit sources or is an opinion piece, you can safely throw it out, because it’s not journalism, and nor is it important.

This is incredibly important to me; I’ve seen so many claims recently that have no backing in reality, and it’s really starting to unnerve me. What benefit is there to come up with conspiracy theories that fail a shave with Occam's Razor? Why would you chose to be ignorant of the truth and ignore evidence; wouldn’t you rather be right and have your thoughts form around things that are real over being wrong about everything?

And this source citing is especially important, not just in news headlines but other things as well. You know how many times anonymous game leaks have been believed and then completely falsified? How many time I’ve looked up rules or things with games and seen an answer that claims to be an authority, but has no backing (D&D rulings are especially guilty of this in places like reddit)? So here’s what I propose; it’s of course not that important to quote sources on everything you can think of. But at least think of how you know it. Where was the source? Have you checked it? If you’re having a discussion and need to bring out a fact the other person hadn’t heard of, where’s the harm in trying to find a source for it?

And don’t be afraid to say you’re unsure or that you don’t know; this is fine! It’s better to say you don’t know something and be open to information rather than make up something and then be closed to it. 

... But mainly if you try and have a discussion in, say, the comments section on common ruling in /r/dndnext, make a point to say what page or book the rule your referencing is on. 

Games I played this week

Normally the weeks after the Holidays are filled with me joyously going through all the neat games I got, but unfortunately the Holidays were a bit.... Different, this year, and that wasn’t the case. I ended up splurging and getting a few games anyway, and here’s what I played this week.

Paper Mario: Color Splash

I already covered this in my big WiiU retrospective, but I’m going to go a bit further. This game is a mechanical mess. Sure, the writing’s good, but it makes so many design choices that just don’t work, and it’s worth looking into.

The card combat system was clearly the biggest issue, and the designers knew that. They added in several aspects to make it less stressful and more tactical; A solid number of max cards, with no “big cards,” paint in order to power up cards, and a battle wheel to ensure you don’t completely run out, turning the focus from making moves that preserve your attacks to making moves that make the most effective use of your turns. Basically, you never *really* run out of options.

However, this MASSIVELY misses the point. What is the purpose of having a limited attack selection if you’re going to supply the player with the means to attack regularly anyway, and have cards pop out of EVERYTHING? Why not just go to a normal RPG battle system again; it accomplishes the same thing with turning into an item management simulator. They also didn’t fix the core problem I had with Sticker Star, which is that you’re actively encouraged not to engage in battle, as it would waste resources for at best the cards you lost and some “paint hammer badges” (become pointless halfway through the game even without actively fighting). You should never, ever, ever, encourage your players not to use or to actively avoid a core mechanic.

Additionally, the real worlds objects, or Things, return, which would be fine if every boss fight but the final wasn’t reliant on you finding and guessing what you needed before the fight and using it at exactly the right moment. How should I have known I’d need the balloons to pull a submarine out of the water, when I didn’t even know there would be a submarine? Well... They knew this issue as well: you ask the toad who tells you what you need before you enter the next level. It’s a cheap solution, and a waste of time to continually need to run back to the “hub” to check to make sure you have the right thing- sorry, Thing. It’s not exactly clear organically either. You find an ice pick. What do you use it on? Ice of course! Not really though; you melt ice with a hair dryer. Using the ice pick actually has its own text saying it doesn’t work. It’s an artificial wall that just serves as a waste of time.

What I will say, however, is they did a good job with having optional side-content. There are loads of things I know I didn’t find; alternate exits, Luigi’s, a couple Things, and there’s an achievement banner system as well. So there’s a lot of work to be done, but it’s not all bad. I still can’t recommend it though.

Mario Party Star Rush

.... This is really good. Like, the best Mario Party I’ve played since Gamecube days good; maybe even better. The main game mode actually feels like a board game, but makes clever use of the fact that each player has their own system. Sure, there’s still that crazy MP luck thrown in, but it feels fun. I feel like me playing well actually has an effect on the game, without feeling like all hope is lost if I’m losing or getting too comfortable with my lead. There’s loads of fun minigames, and even though it’s got the normal Mario environments and look, it’s made them feel fresh and fun.

I can’t recommend this enough. It’s really good game design with the traditional feel of a Mario Party game with fresh new game modes, rather than MP9/IT/10′s destruction of the formula in favor of random chance.

DOOM

Man this game!... Runs at 17 fps on my computer on low settings =(

Pony Island

Pretty fun sort of Anti-game so far. It’s got me interested, and its mix of actual gameplay with a creepy possessed 90′s computer and messing with the way code runs. It makes you think out of the box a lot, and I like that, though I probably should’ve suspected when the... “antagonist”? Asked if I wanted to leave to take a break so it can work on making more content that saying yes would close the whole game

Touché, Pony Island.

No judgement yet, but so far it’s positive so far

What I’m looking forward to next week

Awesome Games Done Quick Starts tomorrow!

Keewy’s attending that, and I’m excited for him! It’s always fun to tune into every once in a while, and it’s an awesome way to raise money for charity as well as show off some cool games and speedruns. I’m specifically looking forward to Miles’ MP2 run (always a fun watch), The Mario Sunshine Race, Ori and the Blind Forest, Mighty Number 9 (just out of curiosity), The Sonic block is almost always a fun time, And of course the TAS block. But honestly, I’ll tune in randomly, because I always find one or two really good runs and commentators on games I never previously had any interest int. Check it out!

The Nintendo Switch Direct is on the 12th, 8:00 PST

Everyone got their bingo cards? I’m personally excited to see what the launch lineup is, as well as how well it runs docked and undocked, which will be easy to see since they’re doing a treehouse stream I believe immediately after it, so that’s going to clear up a lot of things. 

... And that’s it! I’ll get to the project post tomorrow