#how are they going to learn anything if theyre afraid to ask questions in a school setting!

[sam-the-pancake]

New school year is starting so I'm being reminded of this again. Last year when I got my wheelchair I asked my boss if I could send an email to staff before the start of the school year telling them that I'm a part time wheelchair user and to please be normal about it (not literally that but that's why I wanted to). She had to talk to HR and eventually I was told no because "it wouldn't be appropriate to tell everyone you were pregnant" and I'd have to handle it individually. She said they knew my disability/wheelchair wasn't the same as being pregnant but it was the closest example anyone could think of and had experience with. (Also as a trans masc person comparing my wheelchair to a pregnancy feels extra weird)

But it's SO NOT anything like a pregnancy. When you're pregnant people are generally happy for you. When you start showing and people aren't sure if you're actually pregnant it's considered common courtesy to not ask because the pregnant person could be offended if they aren't.

When you're pregnant people don't run up to you and say "Oh my god! Are you gonna be ok? I hope your pregnancy isn't dangerous! Get better soon!" Even though you're excited to be pregnant. Imagine if for 6-7 months, daily, your coworkers told you "I'm sorry you're sick, get well soon" but you have a happy healthy pregnancy. No ones accusing people of faking their pregnancy for??? Attention? The benefits??? Being lazy?? This is the analogy my boss and HR made me come up with because apparently my disability and getting a wheelchair is the same as being pregnant.

Disclaimer that I know not all pregnancies are low risk or something the person is happy about, but that's not what this is about. I was excited and happy that I finally have a wheelchair and was trying to avoid invasive and depressing comments from my coworkers, and was told I can't give people a heads-up that I'm fine just disabled because it would be like announcing a pregnancy.

[agirlwithglam]

how to have an alluring and magnetic aura always?? even when you feel insecure 💞

hi pookie!

ok so first, fix the insecure part. because you shouldn't be wanting to be attractive and appealing to others when you're not even that to yourself! people see and feel the vibe of how you feel about yourself and if you're insecure, then they can see that. how do you expect people to love and accept you if you don't yourself?

so first to have a magnetic aura, grow yourself. become confident, evolve as a person, learn new things, be cultured, etc. learn more about yourself first. anyways, heres some tips;

how to be magnetic and alluring

⭐️magnetic people are charismatic! take an interest in others, make them feel seen and heard. to be honest nowadays its not even so hard to do that because so many people are obsessed with their phone or all they do is always talk about themselves. imagine how appreciated someone would feel if you actually took the time to make them feel seen and appreciated and loved as a person? stop focussing on making you look magnetic and alluring, and start focusing on how you can make other people feel better!

also along with this, be kind. you do not wanna be one of those fake confident people who think theyre confident but are actually really rude. no. instead, ask people about their day, check up on them. be a good person. be empathetic and show sincere interest in others!

⭐️your vibration. below i have put a vibration chart. when you are vibrating at a higher level with joy, love, and peace, you can easily attract much more and much better into your life! but when you're vibrating in the lower end of the spectrum in fear, guild, and anger, then people can also sense that and will stay away from you.

to get your vibration higher, what you can do is do things that make you happy, make you laugh! whether thats spending time with people you love, watching a comedy, dancing all your heart out (dancing is a very good option btw), do it and see how you feel after.

⭐️dont overshare about your life. let there be a bit of mystery around you. let people wonder a bit about you. dont tell theme very single story of your life- and learn that its okay if theres parts in a conversation where you're silent and have nothing to say. pausing to actually take the time to think about what to ask is much better then desperately trying to fill the conversations with meaningless stories about yourself.

⭐️BE AUTHENTIC. if youre trying to be someone else or copy their personality, how they talk their style, etc completely- people can sense that low vibrational energy! they can sense that you dont feel comfortable in the person who you are which then makes you more repulsive to others. always be fully and truly yourself.

not everyone will like or love you for being yourself, but you need to stop seeing that something so bad and scary. its actually good to be disliked because then you will attract so many lovely better people for you who love you wholly for the person you are!

⭐️present yourself in the best way possible. a way that makes you feel confident in yourself. a way that makes you step out into the world and truly believe that you can do anything. i dont mean be super obsessed with your looks, but take care of yourself. have good hygiene. smell nice. wear nice clothes that make you feel better. when people see that you're taking care of yourself and you really care about yourself, they will reflect that to you.

⭐️have an open body style! make eye contact and dont close your body- that will make you look reserved and as if you don't want anyone to come to you because you're too scared. don't be afraid to TAKE UP SPACE!

your to-do list:

when you're having a conversation with someone else, listen to all the words they say, how they say it, how they feel about it, then ask questions about it it will much more naturally come to you when you arent spending the entire time thinking about what to say to please them

go check up on a friend or a love one right now. text them saying how are you? let them know you're thinking of them.

start doing your favourite hobbies, stuff that your younger self loved doing.

actually take care of yourself when you go out. get your nails done, brush your hair, lip gloss, etc.

next time you're in a public space/ an event/ party, have an open body langauge and DON'T cross your arms!

do something that will raise your vibration

[luffyvace]

Tanjiro x male reader<3

Tanjiro x male reader won second place in the poll!! :) enjoy tanjiro stans<3

Starting back at the final selection let’s say that’s when you met

just to clear things up

and you two started dating some time after that

of course eventually making it official

tanjiro was quite flustered when he realized his sexuality might be different from tradition

but he wasn’t afraid to be bi/gay/pan or anything

he just thought- ..! Actually he never really thought of that type of thing..

I mean he was kinda too young

but now that your together!

he has time to figure it all out :)

tanjiro is such a sweet lover!

and helpful!

and caring!

(Really he’s a ball of love)

if you feel tired he carries you

(Even if your both beat up after a mission)

if you need water he’ll spare you some of his or go fetch some

And he’s always down to spar at any type of day!

I will say he’s not thinking about you in that way when you take your shirt off

but when you do he definitely admires you!

you might have abs seeing as though the demon slayer corps has………...harsh (brutal) training 😅

if you do then he sees it as a result of your hard work!

same with scars!

especially with scars<3

he can 100% relate and you two share stories about each one

if you have any—you probably trauma bond

you guys just end up talking all night long about your past, everything that happened, your pain, whether you want revenge or not and so on!

It strengthens your trust and relationship with each other

btw if anyone asks why your together as two males or how you know you actually like men..

tanjiro will humbly and politely educate (lecture) them on how important you are to each other, how you met, why/when you started dating and even if they don’t like it, it’s simple to walk away instead of disrespecting your relationship!

I hope y’all don’t run into uzui..

(y’all do)

that man has THREE wives why wouldn’t he question when he sees you two?? 😬🧍‍♀️

tanjiro had to hit em with the quick fix cuz when I tell you he did not let that slide 😂

especially with how slick uzui mouth be gettin..😒

Tanjiro also has learned to adjust to scavenging for food (he grew crops with his mom)

as well as inosuke (he grew up in the wild) and zenitsu (he used to have crops with his sensei)

so if you can too, great!

if not the 3 of them work together to make the 4 of you meals

and after they learn how to stop burning them

theyre pretty tasty too!!

don’t expect inosuke to share.

do expect inosuke to take

-note to self, m/n.

zenitsu doesn’t see the attraction to males instead of females

he won’t judge but will ask you two if your sure your into males

and after tanjiro gives him that lecture about being respectful-

he doesn’t question it again

LOL

inosuke straight up don’t care

he doesn’t really view relationships in a romantic way

its more so between “they’re beneath me” , “they’re above me, I must beat them”

so no worries about him judging either 😋

if nezuko doesn’t like you

it’s not to say tanjiro won’t date you because of it

but I’ll honestly say it plays a factor

If sweet nezuko doesn’t like you it prob means something..🤨

she has good instincts so tanjiro might start to assume you have ill intent or smth 😬

he’ll try to get her to like you and if she warms up to you he assumes it might’ve been personal 😂🤷‍♀️

but if she doesn’t..

he finds you like 30% less attractive🧍‍♀️

if she does like you from jump, she starts to protect you as well

and loves to spend time with you when she’s outside her box

tanjiro adores this and you three cuddle or play in each other’s hair whenever you have the time

It also makes him happy if you accept nezuko as a demon quickly

after missions tanjiro finds you, nezuko, zenitsu and inosuke

then cries

like your all just a crying mess tbh

i mean unless your like emotionally unavailable..

BC I DON’T SEE HOW YOU COULD NOT CRY AS A MINOR WHO HAS TO KILL LITERAL HORRIFYING BEASTS FOR A LIVING?!?!?!?

Tanjiro will help you achieve your goals as you likely help him achieve his

even more so after that night you had where you opened up to each other about your past

(again, only if you have truama)

tanjiro is really grateful for you

before all he had was nezuko

and aside from zenitsu and inosuke

now he has you!! 💗

tanjiro’s love languages are acts of service, quality time, words of affirmation and (shy) physical touch

actually maybe some gift giving when he can too!!

so all?!

such a green flag 💖

for acts of service as I said he’ll genuinely do any sane thing you ask of him

he cares about you that much

he won’t bother to complain about being tired either

he automatically assumes your either doing worse or he’s fine

as for quality time he gets really relieved when he gets sent on missions with you

at least he can be there to see and protect you

(or maybe vice versa 😂)

he’d beat himself up about not being able to protect you more if you get serious injures

tends to your wounds everyday then trains vigorously

to get stronger and protect you as you fight along side him when he fights muzan

if your gonna fight along side him in that battle? He’s gonna need to be strong enough to protect you.

he doesn’t want to loose you.

especially not to that man.

he lost everything to him.

he won’t let it happen again.

💗💕💖🍡♥︎

for quality time outside of missions ✌︎('ω')✌︎

tanjiro likes to train, cuddle, go on walks, go shopping, chit chat :)

All that good stuff <3

with words of affirmation he really just praises you all the time

”you did your best today in training! I could tell! :D”

“You look great today m/n!! I’m glad your wearing the (favorite men’s jewelry piece) I got you!”

”I can definitely tell your getting stronger, m/n!!!”

c:

it can also be

“get a good nights sleep, m/n! I love you!”

”be careful on your mission okay? I love you, m/n!”

“thank goodness we surviveeeeed!!! I love you m/n!! I love you so much!!”

now lastly for (shy) physical touch

he is nervous to touch you

he doesn’t wanna make you uncomfortable, yes that’s the last thing he wants

he doesn’t know how to execute it so he ends up either asking or making it very obvious of what he’s trying to do

that way you can shut him down early on just in case

and you won’t feel pressured to let him if you dislike affection

which mind you he does asks if your okay with it first

so that’s likely not the case

if you did mention your distaste for physical affection, however, it’s duly noted in his mind and will keep it to a minimum

your gonna have to discuss boundaries or else he’s gonna act like you have the plague trying not to upset you 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Tanjiro doesn’t dislike pda or anything

he’s just a bit embarrassed about it

maybe if it’s more subtle like resting your head on his shoulder, then yeah that’s okay!

hugging too!!

but direct kissing or hand holding?

his face is a cherry and he’s apologizing to the passerbyers for disturbing them

even if they don’t mind

he’s self aware when it comes to not disturbing others

tanjiro can be a little flustered/shy about things but he’s certainly isn’t embarrassed about your relationship!

he’s quite proud, actually!

will happily tell/correct anyone that asks or misjudges♡♡♡

It’ll make me happy if you enjoyed this, so hopes to you did!

(apologies for the procrastination, and thank you for your patience lovelies!)

[immoralimmortals]

Thank you for answering my burning character analysis question! I have tons more :D can you tell me about your thought process when you were writing each of the Akatsuki and how you put them together and how their personalities reflect in canon? Hugs

Oh...this is such a big question. I'll do my best! Answers under the cut <3

Honestly a big thing for me is to try to incorporate their actual way of speaking in my head? I try to notice the way they talk, and I think that's a big step into making them more convincing. I reblogged something before that's like...the best advice for writing, ever. Ask less "if" they'd do it and more "how" they'd do it. How, if you want something to happen, would this action be carried out by this character? I think this opens a lot of avenues for the imagination and helps make the story more fun. If you incorporate their manner of speaking, that's a big step into making the character believable (points in favor of you executing the "how")

For specific characters...here's some ideas I got in mind.

Itachi is a walking dead man. He knows he's dying. The thing that drives him is the execution of how he will die. So he keeps moving forward, at least so that how he passes on is the way it's meant to be. I think that makes it hard to enjoy life. I think he still treasures it-- i think he loves the little things like a sip of hot tea, a breeze in the air, the way someone smiles...but he's not exactly a thrill seeker. He doesn't go out of his way to enjoy things, especially if they're more outgoing in nature, unless it's to benefit someone he cares about. When it comes to said someones...he feels a great sense of responsibility. He's very subdued and doesn't intervene often, especially anything harsher than a suggestion, but when he DOES, it's quite controlling. Hence the whole assumption that using his genjutsu to solve problems being the right thing to do without their consent.

He's reflective, he's passive, he's tired...but he has very strong ideals that will cause him to act.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Kisame is a lot like Itachi in the sense that he's very understanding of receiving a poor fate based on his actions. However, it's like Itachi has a 100% assurance about life while Kisame still wavers. He has strong ideals, very much so, and he acts very surely...but he has trouble thinking of himself positively outside of how well he fights. Truth is very important to him, and I think he's always second guessing others' intents. Not always in the direction of "theyre treacherous liars", but also "they mean something besides what they say". Double speak, holding back feelings, that kind of thing. I think despite himself he has a strong sense of chivalry-- which I use less here in regards to gender itself and more as a sense of knightship, of gratitude and servitude to those he believes deserves it. He has rough hands and a monster sword; might as well put them to good use and stand between them and the thing that intends to harm.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

First and foremost about Deidara: he behaves as if someone in his life gave him the advice of "it is essential for your brain and health for you to make sure you are doing and learning new things" and he defined his whole existence around it. He WANTS to know more. He wants to learn, experience, he wants to expand his horizons. He isn't afraid of new information, at least not in itself. What's an artist if not also a critic, absorbing all the world has to give in order to reflect it in their work?

I also think of him-- since he's only 19 in the anime-- as someone who must have been a child prodigy, since he's so powerful and (presumably) feared. Here's a quote from chapter 22:

Being lauded as a genius from a young age is both a blessing and a curse for the clay ninja: a blessing because a lack of confidence is worse than slitting your own throat in the shinobi world. A curse…— ...Because Deidara so often forgets he’s hardly had time on this earth at all, at least not compared to his cohorts. You have to be quick on your feet to win the game. And so...he adapts(...)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Sasori is, predictably, the opposite of Deidara in a lot of ways. He's very self assured in the sense that HE is right and YOU are wrong. He's not very assured at all in regards to new information and other viewpoints. I've described him before-- and I mean this in the most loving way I can-- shallow and painfully self-conscious. He isn't good with criticism, isn't good with seriously considering other's conflicting viewpoints, and it takes him a long time or harsh outcomes to make him change his tune about something. I think he's so impatient despite loving the concept of immortality and eternity because he has inflexible criteria for what he's comfortable spending said immortality with. Time is precious. Don't waste his fucking time!

He's a lot more sensitive than he'll ever admit. That's why he's drawn to aesthetics; that's why he's so regretful of having a human heart. That's why he's so controlling over what exists around him.

"...I know how hard it is to try to talk to people,” the singer confesses. “That...it’s easier to deal with what you like and know and can predict, make that last instead of going through the trouble wasting through things you don’t just in hopes of it being better. I want to help!” Her breath hitches at this sudden reveal, but she takes a deep lungful to quickly correct. “I mean...I want it to be... easy for you.” (...) “I found myself wondering, you know? You know good things are eternal. So why is it so easy for you to feel your time is being spent badly? At first it seemed weird to me...but now it makes sense. You want your time well spent, to be full of things you enjoy or can at least tolerate. I get that.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Kakuzu is...a heartbroken man at the core that's built up layers around him to prevent that from ever happening again. I think he's very pragmatic. He looks at the past, sees his mistakes, and tries to move forward. He's halfway between thinking his past self-- before failing his suicide mission-- is an idiot and halfway to wanting to lock that piece of him in a box and protect it forever. It certainly wasn't *right*! ...But it did happen. So what now?

I think his perspective of money is the most factual, realistic conclusion he could come towards about what's reliable and ultimately matters. I don't think of him as a Scrooge type who's greedy for the sake of being greedy. I think he's very mindful of where money goes on a personal scale, the scale of the Akatsuki, and even up to international politics. He can't singlehandedly fix the way the world works, so he instead weaves through it, finds space and finances to make it work.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Hidan is...absolutely fascinating! He decided the logical conclusion of life is to experiment upon himself (see: torture) until he has received immortality. But that's not the reward in itself, no, he FERVENTLY believes in his god and he's right. He believes that slaughter is important and I think the sociological aspect of that is just so interesting. Because you're supposed to slaughter your neighbor. Is this meant as an extension of "don't trust anyone besides yourself"? Is the extinction of the human race the *intended* result? WHY does Jashin want people to die? What's that all for! Huh!

Anyway it really must be a very high tension, radicalizing childhood/life he's had to get him where he is. I think something very important to him is his autonomy. He wants what HE wants and why do YOU get to tell him otherwise? I think this explains why he complains about praying before battle, doing rituals to be forgiven for leaving someone half dead, etc despite being loyal to his faith.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Writing for Konan and Pain/Nagato is going to be really interesting, because a lot of it is going to be me figuring out how I feel about them on a more personal level, interacting emotionally. What I do feel strongly about is that they are both very virtuous, have very strong values. I think you have to in order to do what they're doing.

I think being Konan in particular must be very difficult because I think she is *consciously* very selfless. She isn't a pushover, she isn't uncaring, she doesn't act merely because she has nothing else to do besides what you suggest. She gives herself fully to her role as Pain's angel. How much of yourself do you give away for that? Her own opinions, ideas, wants...she willingly gives it up like she's a saint. Her life's purpose is to carry out the will of whom she perceives as a literal god on earth.

...But that god was once her friend. The body he inhabits is the corpse of the man she fell in love with. I think you HAVE to be broken up over all this, even if you try to put it aside for the greater good.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

I think of Nagato very similarly, in that he's not himself anymore but what he *needs* to be. He's a god. He has to play the role of god. Do things he doesn't want to do, take on responsibilities that perhaps shouldn't be put just on one man. Your autonomy just...whoosh! It's gone. You're an idea now, not a person. You have a goal, that's why you exist. Is it inevitable? Is this the only way he could have made sense of the kind of life he lived? Can someone give this guy a warm blanket and a hug? Holy shit, that's sad.

The flip side is that as a result he's very straightforward and assured. It makes de-personalization from his choices a lot easier.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

I'm going to be honest with you: I haven't fully decided how Zetsu works! I've done extensive roleplay as fusion characters before (think in similar terms as Steven Universe) so I'm not uncomfortable or unfamiliar with the concept. I'm just not...entirely sure...how the concept is carried out? Like if he's always, literally, two people that happen to share a body or if they're one person. The solution in the roleplay I mentioned is that the answer has to be both. So that's how I write him! Sometimes thoughts are from one of them, sometimes thoughts are from another. They, however, have a LOT of common ground and it makes it easy to make him coherent when I write.

Zetsu has such a disconnect from other people. One half has a nearly scientific, detached sort of interest in humans while the other is, as far as I can tell, the personification of hatred for humanity and a desire to start over? I think that makes him a very callous person with a great sense of humor. I also think this makes it very difficult for him to know his feelings when it comes to feeling positively, connectingly towards those around him. Stop that, feelings! I don't like that! Surely what I *really* want is control and to belittle the person! ...Why don't I feel better.

He just stares. There she is, just as he wanted. Scared, desperate, underneath his thumb, remorseful of her actions...and yet. And yet. ...He is not satiated.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Tobi is a caricature of what Obito thinks of his child self, a genre-aware character who he uses to tell the kind of story he thinks life is. He is flagrantly foolish, cheery, useless(?), emotional, and personal. Tobi has all of the traits that Obito thinks he was as a naive kid and turns it up to 11, and THEN he uses the persona to be mean to people. I'm kind of obsessed with it, I think that's hilarious. When I write for him, I constantly think of how he compensates for having a masked face by greatly exaggerating his physical movements and tone of voice. He is, at heart, a performer doing a performance.

Obito himself...so he runs on the assumption that if he succeeds, then everything he's ever done will be justified. Right? I think that results in someone simultaneously so sure of themself while also feeling like he's stepping on nails every step of the way. Something deep in him has to be uncomfortable and hate it. For this reason, as the story develops, I think in the fic he's relieved. He sees purpose in seeing joy and relationships develop when Takara is there because he sees it as a demonstration of sorts. Him learning what it takes to try to make a world worth living in...which is ultimately what he plans to do.

If you want to know anything more specific, do let me know! Thanks for the ask uvu

[the-meadowlarks-cradle]

Aesop Carl Regressor Headcanons

First request of the blog! Apologies this has been a little slow to get out, life got pretty busy (ówò" ) I love aesop and these headcanons were fun to write, thank you anon who requested them!!

Theyre under the cut 🫶 hope you enjoy!

- I think Aesop would regress as a trauma response, first and foremost. It's involuntary, for him, and he finds a lot of parts of his regression to be rooted in his trauma - such as the loss of his mother and how bad of a caretaker Jerry was. As a result, I feel that it's a part of Aesop that he tries to keep hidden away, due to how hard it is to manage - and if he ever were to get a caregiver he would be very clingy toward them as they'd be trusted with such a vulnerable part of him.

- He would find most things tiring and would get super drained from most activities. He would also get overwhelmed by most tasks way easier, due to being autistic on top of being small, which would be another reason why he represses it so much. He would be afraid to ask for help though, he doesn't want to feel like a burden on his CG - and he would need a lot of patience and coaxing into realising he's allowed to ask for help.

- Nap time of course is his favourite time because of this. He would love to pick a story out for his CG to read, he loves being able to wear whatever clothes feel softest and best to him, and he finds nothing more comforting than cuddling up and falling asleep to the sound of his carer's voice as they read him one of his favourite stories... despite the fact he would be more prone to nightmares (but he'd love his carer calming him even more). He'd also really like bath time I think too! He loves being clean, and it's a nice way for him to deal with sensory problems - for some reason the water and bubbles make it easier to ground himself.

- I think Aesop would find talking the hardest thing to do while small honestly. He's already so shy that social situations tend to stress him out and he barely wants to interact with anyone - baby aesop would get so stressed and anxious trying to talk and most of the time it'd come out as soft babbling and fretful whining as he's trying his hardest to communicate. His CG would have to be very good at yes/no questions, they work the best as they require the least strain.

- I don't think Aesop's interest in death would lessen however, I just think it would manifest in more innocent ways. He would be more like a curious child - well, because he is - and I feel Aesop would enjoy still talking about it in a more child friendly manner. He would still like to learn and be told about embalming amd mortuary work, this is his version of learning about dinosaurs in all honesty.

- I also think Aesop is actually Less likely to stim as a kiddo, or show any autistic traits unless he's told that he's allowed to. Since Aesop got extremely shunned and bullied as a kid for his autism, it'd make sense he would be afraid of showing anything that would make him seem "weird" or "different" to other people. It would mean a lot for his caregiver to tell him that being himself is okay, and a lot of being his CG would be helping Aesop be himself in a lot of ways, shapes and forms.

- But once he accepts that help and love, tiny Aesop would be such a loving and close little. As hard as things are to do in his regressed state, he would really go out of his way to make his CG feel important to him - they would be more so shown in the ways of him opening up to them and letting his caregiver get closer, as that is the biggest sacrifice he feels he can give, but it is a gesture of thanks, and how much he appreciates he can trust his carer.

[hetalia-club]

Giving you this bc ur like, the only hetalia blog i still follow that still posts. But like.

Okay back in 2018-2019(?) i had a pretty big hetalia phase, i watched hetafacts videos n every episode that was on YouTube, i listened to the music on repeat. It was a major hyperfixation before i knew that i was autistic.

For the longest time after i stopped, engaging with hetalia for some reason i would. Cringe really hard whenever i saw anything hetalia related. Like. On ao3 when you go to search things it tells you how to search things and one i got (and keep getting) is like "hetalia tag:f/f" or something idk how proper ao3 searches work. Id like screenshot it and go to my friends n say "it haunts me" or some shit.

But like recently ive been. Embracing that part of my past? I guess? Like. Almost like coming to terms with it? Idk i started having a less bad reaction n like, realized it probably one of the more normal fandoms i was in. I was, cringe, as all kids are, but i was. Happy.

And then like. At a sleepover a few weeks ago, one thing leads to another and im telling my friend abt the songs and how ich leibe is. Just a recipe, and how i used to listen to almost all of the songs. I show them the clip of France trying to get England to sign a marriage contract, America ordering fucking condoms from Russia.

It has been at least 2 weeks since, and i can feel the hyperfixation coming back, half the music ive been listening too again is hetalia character songs (theyre so fucking good???) and ive been getting. Urges to watch the show and. I dont know how to feel or what to do?? Like. I'm afraid almost to get back into hetalia? Like i watched black butler a while ago, and i realized how. Theres some weird fucking tension between ceil n sebastian n i think im afraid im going to have that same reaction to hetalia?

Cause like there is shit i just completely forgot about. Like. The Bad Touch Trio. And im scared man.

Im sorry to fuckin, give you all of this, but i just. I dont know what to do ig. None of my friends like or used to like hetalia, the one i do info dump hetalia stuff too does not like hetalia and is learning shit about it against their will.

Idk, should i watch the show again? Is it, good? I genuinely can't remember anymore.

Sorry for using ur ask box like a confessional

I mean I’m right there with you man. The sole reason I am still in the Hetalia fandom is because hetalia got me through some real dark chapters and events in my life. I discovered Hetalia years ago in Highschool while with a very abusive ex who had to know everything I was doing at any given time. He wouldn’t let me go anywhere without him there. I tried to break up with him but he actually wouldn’t let me. He would threaten to off himself if I did so I felt bad because his mom was an alcoholic and his houses burned down. I stopped really going anywhere at all because if I did he would come with me and he ruined my relationships with most of my friends just by being ‘the worst’. I stopped cheerleading, I got depression really bad, I started to do terrible in all my classes but I discovered Hetalia while on deviant art and was instantly intrigued. It was like “idk what this is but I will now make it my personality”

Years later while with my most recent abusive Ex that I just broke up with last November I got back into Hetalia when our relationship started to get really bad and hard to cope wit on my own. I needed an escape and something to help me avoid him and no care so much about his insults something that I could think about instead of being sad all the time. Hetalia is something that just brings me joy. Instead of venting to people, getting therapy or increasing my meds Hetalia was just always there to go back to and escape. No idea what it is about it. Won’t go into details about the relationship, it’s irrelevant right now but I’m sure you can guess.

To answer your question, no Hetalia isn’t ‘good’ it makes zero sense and is confusing as hell. But for me it’s fun to use as a spring board for basically any kind of AU I could think up. The characters can fit into any type of situation you want to shove them in.

I would say give it a rewatch, as much as you want anyway. What is the worst that could happen? You continue an interest that brought you joy? Worst case. You are a bit cringe? Who cares if you are cringe if you are happy? Also not encouraging you to live a double life but if you are embarrassed to like Hetalia you don’t actually have to tell anyone how obsessed with it you are. No one but my ex knows how much I like Hetalia and he really has no idea just how deep I am in this shit. But if people knowing about one of your interests humiliates you then just don’t share it. At the end of the day it’s your comfort and it makes you happy it’s no one’s business.

There are a lot of old fandom tropes that have disappears the BTT being one of them. They put them as a group still but I guess they call it ‘bad friends ti’ now. There are still some things that make me side eye. But that’s every fandom I feel. You can choose who you wish to associate with and who you want to block or avoid. It’s your blog you don’t own an explanation to anyone.

Personally I don’t interact much with the people of the fandom itself I got a few people it talk to every now and again but really i just do my own thing. I write my own fics for myself. I got my little tumblr, discord and TikTok, I post about my little AUs and dumb thoughts and continue on. If people want to follow me that’s great, welcome. If they don’t that’s cool to!

Thanks for sticking around with me even after your Interest in Hetalia fizzled out tho haha! That had to be difficult I am very annoying at times I’m sure 😭.

Again worst thing that could happen than if you are a bit cringe. But not being cringe is boring as hell. Irl I’m one of the most normal bitches you could find. Carbon copy white girl. Absolutely no one would guess I were a Hetalia obsessed loser irl. In a line up you could not pick me out and guess my interests. So in February I got my hair done right? I got like. 500 dollar biolage it fades from brown to strawberry blonde. Want to know the reason I got this hair style? Because of Italy that’s why. I wanted red hair like him. Did I tell anyone that? No. When people said they liked my hair and asked me why I went red I would just go “idk just felt like it” but I would be thinking about him knowing the real answer.

Good luck anon, if you stick around welcome back the water is fine. If you don’t can you toss me that life vest up there if you don’t mind? Thank you!

[xl012v]

Vent

I dont have the patience for anyone on twitter I think I might just stop using it forever and ever and ever. My headmates can have fun there but if I have to deal with one more petty self absorbed bitch or another ignorant asshole I think I might start eatjng my own legs

I think I’m only upset about this because I feel that I’m rejected every time I try to reach out to someone

I’m not even reaching out for any of my own reasons either. I’m doing it because I’m told thats the “mentally healthy” thing to do and I’m just fucking obsessed with achieving perfection lately. So many people try to lecture me about how I’m not doing enough to make friends or bond with people when all I’ve ever done my entire life is pour my heart and soul into people only to get the bare minimum in return. I am so so so fucking tired of having to make the first move because everyone else is too insecure or scared to do it on their own. If people really want me then they know where to find me. They just refuse to. I dont mean anything to anyone

I’m also just being crushed by the weight of having to be my system’s new host because the host before me had such a rich social life and now I have to manage it. I do have people who “chase” after me, but they bore me to death because theyre all the old host’s friends. They didnt do anything wrong, honestly theyre all so sweet and I’m grateful to have at least someone but. Theyre just so boring.

I hate having to watch people interact with us less when I’m fronting. I hate seeing people be intimidated by me or afraid of me. I havent done anything wrong and I choose my words so so carefully even when I’m literally enraged. Even when reacting with rage and anger is completely justified, I am still kind and patient to everyone around me. But it means nothing because I talk weird I act weird I look weird. I might as well lash out on anyone and everyone because nobody will ever grow to like me. Why do I hold back every day when I gain nothing from it?

What set off this rant is mostly me being overstimulated and tired but I think I reached my breaking point because of this one person on twitter asking the most idiotic, UNRELATED question under a post I made about substance abuse and my relationship with my ex. Sometimes I’m convinced he acts like this just to piss me off. But if I told him to go learn some manners, or if I took it even further and told him to go fuck himself, I’d be the bad guy! I fucking always am

[shhhhhiminsidesaitamascloset]

what i wish someone told me about the internet in general regarding making friends passed 2010:

- Dont force things on people selfishly. Dont expect everyone to like or accept all of you. Hold dearly to the people who stick up for you and stay with you despite everything (even being "opposites"). The true gems are the ones who are ride or die but also on your level regarding similar beliefs, values, etc. Dont let others convince you to go down a dark path and make you question who you are.

- Dont get close to people who trash on your religion, beliefs, values. Or trash things you enjoy. Dont befriend people who are negative all the time and their self deprication is so concerning you'd have to ask if they need a therapist, God, or both. Not everyone that gravitates to you is for you. and if your beliefs change overtime dont be afraid to part ways with people from that past.

- Be accepting to burn bridges when your boundaries are being disrespected and they have little to no respect to how you feel. Dont perpetuate cycles that set you up for disappointments and depression. We all had that one dad who went to the store to get milk and never came back. And some of us have attachment issues that went unchecked for years because of that. Just block that inconsistent person you call friend and move on.

- When you block or part ways with someone do it with a forgiving heart. Even if everything hasnt been explained and youre hurting, make sure you never part ways with someone on a bad note. It'll follow you to the next person you might need to burn bridges with and can develop into an untreated attachment issue.

Just make yourself forgive them even if they wronged you because when youre not able to forgive it has a lasting effect on you and youre carrying unnecessary baggage from that encounter. its true for online and irl. next time youre in an internet argument with some prick or having issues with a so-called "friend" dont take it personal. yes its the internet. but they are also people behind that screen too. but also learn do what you gotta do for yourself.

-Make sure you dont take what the other person says or does personally during this time . Maybe yall meet again on good terms and become buddies again or better than before. But also accept if theyre gone, they will probably be gone for good. You cant mend all bridges. And you cant accept that all will come back to you. But know that its apart of life and its neither good nor bad when you have to let people go. It just is and mostly for your benefit and happiness in the end. especially if something like hacking, doxxing, or stalking happens. if you are christian, let God handle it. if you believe in karma trust that theyre bad deeds go unpunished. Dont make those things get to you and make you feel worse.

- take any and every information you get with a grain of salt. dont be quick to cancel and drop things because some random person on the internet says so. especially when the benefits outweigh the odds, or the think piece is based on personal bias rather than actual concerns of society. dont be fooled by fancy words (i wasnt) not every person that speaks for the cause is for the cause.

grifters exist. and nowadays its all a popularity contest. and not every leftist and feminist is your friend or ally or speaks for equality, equity, and human rights. and maybe there are somethings you dont agree with. stay away from the hive mind. think for yourself. if your values and beliefs change you are not a "traitor". Be discerning of anything and everything you see and hear and come to your own conclusion of how you feel about it.

- there are alot of scary things on the internet just like it is in life. i been knew this and for years i never let things like cybersecurity risks and doxxing get to me. because it can and will happen somehow some way. like your nudes being leaked. something you said at a younger age being taken completely out of context. and nobody cares if youre mentally ill or disabled with no guidance. if its meme-able or lolcw worthy the internet will make sure you remember that moment for the rest ot your life.

but something someone told me that made this specific thing less daunting to me. people will talk about you for the rest of your life. and these things i also mentioned are a harsh reality we have to accept. doesnt mean we cant set up precautions to prevent it. But it also doesnt mean we shouldnt use the internet. thats the same logic as saying we cant go outside because a million things could happen if we do. be aware but dont be scared

- if youre young, mentally disabled, suffer from mental illness, or havent been on the internet long enough to know things. please tell your parents, guardians, caregivers, etc who you are talking to. You can choose to not say anything. but if someone is asking you for money, asking for nudes and sexual favors, or is trying to get you to come meet them somewhere way too soon and you have no idea who they are irl, please tell them!

Also try to use discernment and know when someone is out to harm you or just dont do meetups at all if you dont know them like that. if youre in danger, reach out if possible! Make sure you get help locally before branching out to random people from another state. Be careful, be weary, and if you can talk to your parents about the people you speak to online.

-be patient and dont worry about likes, comments, and interactions. dont try to monetize or get popular with something that brings you joy and happiness. because depending on popularity and interactions will only kill your love and passion for that thing. itll probably take decades or a few years for things to go the way you want. just keep posting like youre talking to a wall and someone will eventually see it.

i think that's all i got. Also MINORS (Includes 17 and under). DO NOT POST NSFW OR NUDES ONLINE! its illegal! Anybody who has that content you put out there w/o knowing your age can get in trouble! So please dont be dumb.

i hope all i said was beneficial. ill add at least three tags and edit this later. stay blessed and drink plenty water. ily ✌️❤️🙏

also if someone says you should make adult content or do onlyfans: DONT!!

they only want free stuff from you and dont care about you all that much. from experience. ✌️

[lilchicknugg]

things that make me happy:

- reading romance books…oh how i love love love my books! theyre the best part of my day.

- listening to nice songs as i lay in bed or go about my day. there are just some songs that i love more than myself.

- halloween themes

- jumping around

- dancing in the shower with cold water blasting on me

- spending time with my family…sometimes

- the idea that one day i’ll fulfill my super fucking awesome bucket list!

- being alone/ not talking to anyone

- talking to myself

- cold temperatures + cozy clothes and blankets

- when my bed feels like a hotel bed. sometimes i just really need those vibes

- fresh air

- smelling good/feeling soft after showers. i dont know but it just makes me so happy.

- nice hair days. need i say more.

- lighters. something about holding it and igniting the flame is so comforting to me

- building legos! i love legos so much. my biggest set as of now is the hogwarts castle from harry potter with exactly 6,020 pieces. i have yet to build it but when my family’s new house gets finished building i’ll finally have the space to build the hundreds of lego sets my dad bought.

- learning spanish (when im not tired)

- sending/receiving emails. there’s something so special about it that makes me love it so much but no one uses email for personal matters anymore which i find so sad.

- organizing. in a way it makes me feel like i have control over some aspects of my life.

- taking walks around my ginormous school…but only when im alone

- drinking tea in my living room as the sun’s out and it’s windy. it makes me feel as though im actually living and enjoying life.

- physical touch (only from people i like). even though im deathly afraid of it, to me, physical touch in any way in so intimate and loving that it makes me feel all warm inside when it does happen.

- people who i can talk to without constantly having to filter myself or give great thought into what im about to say

- chocolate cake. i am obsessed with chocolate cake i’ll eat it any form or shape. they make me so indescribably happy.

- receiving (unexpected) compliments. as u can tell, im extremely attention deprived so any compliment really just makes my day.

- chicky! my emotional support stuffed duck who i hug every night as i go to sleep

- my website!! a while back i made a simple html coded website that acts as a journal of all the books i have ever read along with my rating for it and nothing beats the feeling of adding another book into the roster. as of now, my review/thoughts about my books are up on a twitter account i made specifically to talk about my books but one day (when im not lazy) i’ll create a page layout where i can insert my reviews about books.

- grilled cheese sandwiches. wowowowow how i loove grilled cheeses. theyre an all time favorite food!

- living rooms! no matter what house im staying in, i always always hang out in the living room and theyre especially great in afternoon bc i love the atmosphere where the sun is shining and its slightly warm out

- pool/beach days :) i love everything about them—the sun, the water, swimming. if i could live in the water, i would!

- the feeling of sun shining on me

- sushi. i am actually obsessed with sushi and will eat it for every single meal if left unchecked.

- anything fuzzy really. fuzzy blankets, socks, shoes, headbands. despite what everyone says about it being too hot, its my favorite material!

- fandoms. i love seeing other people geek around and be equally excited about certain tv shows and movies as me. its such a nice feeling and makes me feel bonded to them especially when its about a rather niche fandom.

- freshly baked cookies

- when people ask the right questions about me

- random acts of kindness. not just to me, but experiencing it around me as well is such a beautiful thing

- tumblr and reddit :) i love anonymous apps and how everyone is so real about themselves. there aren’t any facades and pretentiousness.

July 2, 2023 (Sunday)

[gin-no-g]

Is it just me or are you able to hear the high-pitched ringing that comes from outlets until you turn them off?

Sorry, I was going to ask you a Haikyuu question about "who would you put on your dream nationals-winning team" but I got distracted and now I need to know if this is just a me thing or something else?

my first ever (random/not a specific prompt) ask on this account!!!! <33 I love you anonymous stranger 💖💖💖

(edited because I did in fact get a bingo ask that I loved and appreciated but my mind blanked lol)

i Am able to hear electricity noises!! there are some quieter outlets and electrical devices but some are.. quite loudㅠㅠ (ive heard that its a common neurodivergent thing?? but im not diagnosed with anything nor did I do research so take that as you will) (also dont be sorry it was a fun question!)

also dream nationals winning team.... Below the cut because its long

ohfhcb I cant chooseㅠㅠㅠㅠ

(we are going to ignore how making/not making it to nationals has impacted the characters and just go with vibes only)

Setters

-oikawa.. because he! deserves it..

-kageyama (would be SO chaotic with oikawa as hinata mentions during the all stars match, but I do feel like they both want the same thing--to play volleyball/stay on the court--so I feel like they could do it....??)

Middle Blockers

-hinata! I would LOVE to see more oikawa and hinata interactions (sorry kageyama..) I think theyre great!

-aone! my baby

-matsukawa I just want him and hinata to play on the same side of the net

Wings/Hitters

-kita!!! Main wrangler of the team tbh, i think hes level header, good at defense, kinda the all rounder thats needed, also super chill with watching and helping the others improve

-sakusa.

Libero

-yaku! I LOVE his vibes and he isnt afraid to punch people which I value (he would get along with sugawara so much imo)

Pinch Hitter

-semi, my freedom man my guy who found a way to fit in the team he didnt really fit into my musician and muse (I dont show appreciation enough for him but hes awesome)

people I genuinely wanted to add but didnt:

-goshiki and shirabu.. as a pair.. (look I just cant keep adding setters to this team but they!! would learn so much!! and also Teach so much too!!!)

-bokuto and konoha.. they are my babies.. but not really the vibe I was going for I guess?

-nishinoya and motoya, i feel like one libero on a team is average and I already put yaku... SO SORRY BABES liberos are so sooo cool ㅠㅠ

-yamaguchi (he is me)

[southislandwren]

.

[dreams-of-klag]

THOughTs on the Green brothers. (spoiler alert, these thoughts are highly positive)

been seeing posts recently about the time john green was bullied off of tumblr like its something to laugh about-- i even reblogged one of them that was talking about how tr*mp should try to join tumblr and see how it goes (which was, admittedly, funny)-- but i just want to throw it out there that john green gets a bunch of shit that he doesnt deserve and i am tired of hearing it.

So heres my incomplete list of great things John and Hank Green have done that dont mean that theyre perfect people but just mean that for FUCKS SAKE people need to lay off and actually recognize that they are good people and actually making the world a better place. 

1. in their podcast, where listeners write in with questions, they always refer to people asking the questions with gender neutral pronouns unless the person specifically expresses a gender in the text of the email. They dont talk about it, its just a thing that quietly happens.

2. Their books are fucking good

John uses his books to subvert common harmful tropes that affect the way people view women and people dealing with chronic illness. “Looking For Alaska” and “Paper Towns” are absolute refusals of the MPDG trope and absolutely condemn the main (male) characters for seeing Alaska and Margot as less than full human beings. “The Fault In Our Stars” is all about how illness in general but cancer specifically doesnt mean anything, its just a horrific thing that happens to people, and how nothing you learn from having cancer is valuable enough to be worth it, and how romanticizing illness hurts people who are dealing with it. “Turtles All The Way Down” is about OCD, about feeling like a burden on people around you, and sometimes actually being hard to be around and actually hard to deal with, but how that doesnt make you less of a person, and doesnt make you any less loved, and how “getting better” or being “cured” is not the end goal of mental illness narratives, sometimes you just need to be able to get through the day and that is OK. 

Hanks books are a trip and a half. “An Absolutely Remarkable Thing” and “A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor” are simultaneously the books that have made me the most afraid of the future, and the most hopeful for the future. I dont know how else to say it. Also. well. written. queer. women. HOLY FUCK. WELL WRITTEN QUEER WOMEN. WRITTEN BY A STRAIGHT WHITE GUY. How?? you ask??? because he fucking talked to queer women, hired sensitivity readers, and actually values the input of marginalized people and wants to represent them well. Read these books. 

3. This isnt even touching on all of the charity work that they do in which they NEVER CENTER THEMSELVES so im going to do it for them because they deserve some recognition for this. They are so generous with their time, attention, platform, and money in a way that i hope becomes more common, but damn, they are making concrete change in the world in a way that most people only talk about. and theyre DOING IT. 

4. THEIR FREE EDUCATIONAL CHANNELS. FREE EDUCATIONAL RESOURCES. FREE. EDUCATIONAL. RESOURCES. and thats not even close to all of them. They also make really great explainer videos on their main channel  about really difficult topics and they break them down into something you can understand. 

They are just earnest, silly, and interesting people who are committed to experiencing the world with curiosity and i could go on and on with the just-- fucking GOOD things both of them have done and people choose to ignore those in favor of laughing about the john green c*ck monologue and making up twitter style canceling manifestos based on not having read any of their books or having engaged with any of their content in any way and straight up garbage. I just think they deserve better than that. 

tldr: stop talking shit about the green brothers. ready for a keanu reeves style green brothers renaissance on this hellsite. 

[sad-brunnettee]

!!could i request a fic where rockstar eddie is dating hispanic popstar reader (like selena vibes) and theyre just a power couple despite how different they are style/music wise

A/n: OH MY GOD YES! When I read this I automatically thought of Selena and Chris!!!

The Rockstar & the Popstar

Eddie Munson x hispanic! Popstar! reader

—

Your personality was what really got Eddie’s attention. You weren’t afraid to speak your mind and dressed how you felt most comfortable. It got you some weird looks from people but it never bothered you. Not just that but there were many who judged your music. You had some listeners who complained about you singing in Spanish, while others complained for your songs in English. You’ve learned that you could never do anything to please others, so you have decided to do things for your own entertainment.

Eddie, your boyfriend was the same, which is why the two of you clicked. Although, that didn’t mean the two of you shared any differences. For example, you wore bright colors and clothing that some may classify as ‘inappropriate’. Eddie, wore dark clothes that made him look scary. Most of your music was about love while others were made to get people to dance to at parties. While Eddie’s music, was loud. It caused heads to bop while increasing the volume, making the bass vibrate everything around them. Regardless, parents thought the same thing, you two were terrible role models for their kids.

Wherever the two of you went, heads will turn. Many weren’t sure how the two of you clicked. You just wished that people would see how great he treats you. Luckily, neither one of you seem to mind the stares or the critics.

Even though there are many people against the two of you, there are others who love you both. You’re not sure how many letters you’ve received from little kids, teenagers and even adults who told you the way your music helped them. Same thing has happened to Eddie, he has been told that he helped them gain confidence.

You just wish the two of you had more time to see each other. Performing concerts has gotten in the way but you two have made it work. You’ve sent one another gifts before their performance, called one another and when either of you could, you’ll go to each others concerts.

You were sitting on the chair in your reading room, you looked through a clothing magazine while a young lady styled your hair. You were invited to be interviewed and there were five minutes left before you had to go on set.

“What do you think of this dress?” You lifted up the magazine allowing, Lisa to see it. She only shook her head with a smile.

“I think…you could style it better y/n.” She responded truthfully, your outfits were always perfect.

“You think so?” You asked surprised.

She was taken aback by your genuine surprise, she would’ve never expected for you to be this down to earth. Yet it warmed her heart knowing that you didn’t let fame get to your head.

“I know so, now let’s go ahead and go to the set. It’s almost time.” She set down her stuff and walked over to open the door for you.

You got up from the chair and shook your hands, “I’m so nervous.” You said while walking towards the door. No matter how many times you’ve done interviews, you could never get used to it. The sound of applause set your brain on autopilot, without thinking you walked into set and waved at the audience with a big smile.

—

The interview was like any other, they’d mix Spanish with English. You think it’s their way to publicly humiliate you if you weren’t able to understand some words. Yet you were able to answer all questions thrown at you.

“So y/n, before our interview is over. Is there anything you’d like to tell the audience?” He asked as he pointed you to the right camera.

“Yes, my new single, Beso, will be out this Friday I hope you enjoy it… and speaking of besos. I’d like to send one to my boyfriend, Eddie. I miss you!” Even if you did sound corny, you wanted to show Eddie some appreciation. Your way of letting him know that nothing will get between you two.

Eddie taglist 🏷️: @hellomyweirdos @lubsana @satsuri3su @n39ro-chann @kenzi-woycehoski @yookayur @wittleespur

[senacal]

Hello! Could you do a jealous! Erik Lensherr x Reader. Theyre both professors and all btw. Thanks!

Assumptions

Request: Requested by a lovely Anon 💕

Pairing: Erik Lehnsherr x Gender Neutral Reader

Prompt: Hello! Could you do a jealous!Erik Lensherr x Reader. They’re both professors and all btw. Thanks!

Warnings: Misunderstandings, jealousy 

Abbreviations: (Y/F/N)- your full name, (Y/N)- your name

Author’s Note: 😬 Sorry this took so long to get out, I had a little bit of writer’s block and of course my dear friend, no motivation. The reader is gender-neutral cause I wasn’t sure what was wanted.

As always, Requests Are Open!

(Not my Gif)

(Y/F/N) loved their job. They couldn’t explain what had convinced them to teach at Charles Xavier’s school for gifted youngsters; perhaps it was Charles Xavier himself, or more likely, the student’s enthusiasm to learn from them. (Y/N) never expected to be a teacher, considering their high school and college experiences weren’t the most exciting or thrilling. They were almost convinced Teachers hated them, which is why it was ironic that they had become a teacher. 

It was a year after (Y/N) had begun teaching that they had met Erik Lehnsherr. He was… different. Not in a bad way, but he was closed off. And he only ever talked to Charles, Raven, and occasionally Hank. For a month, (Y/N) thought he didn’t speak. There was nothing wrong with that either; a few of their students preferred to remain mute, and some students preferred to use Sign Language over speaking to communicate with (Y/N). So, if Erik was mute, it wasn’t an issue. (Y/N) wanted to get to know him better. Which was why they had attempted to be Erik’s friend.

Whenever Erik would enter a room, (Y/N) would casually make their way to him and make small talk. Most of the time they were met with silence. (Y/N) could have sworn Erik smiled the last time they talked to him, so they knew they were getting somewhere. Soon enough, Erik would start responding to them, small-short answers at first, but it was still something. (Y/N) even asked him if they were bugging him when the short answers continued. (He said no, but (Y/N) wasn’t so sure). Sometimes they wished they were an empath so they could get a read on Erik’s feelings, but alas, they were only able to heal an object’s physical wounds. But it was okay because they were a valued member of the team and Charles, Raven, and Hank loved them for them. 

(Y/N) was almost worried Erik would never open up to them, but as soon as he joined the staff of Charles Xavier’s school, (Y/N) noticed Erik lingering near their classroom. It was almost as if he was seeking them out. (Y/N)’s heart fluttered in giddiness at the mere thought. Whenever they saw Erik in the halls, Erik would greet them with a hello and a kind smile. It was the best part of their day. 

It got to the point where (Y/N) would expect to see Erik before they both went to their respective classes, (Y/N) to anatomy, and Erik to physics. This was why they found it disappointing that Erik was nowhere to be found. They wouldn’t have been too worried because even mutants got the flu and needed a vacation, but it was now the fourth day that (Y/N) hadn’t seen Erik and it was very concerning. Did something happen? Did Erik get hurt? Was he seriously ill? Did he leave again? Did he just not want to see (Y/N)? (Y/N) couldn’t stop their mind from jumping to conclusions. It even distracted them from their teaching, so they would often dismiss their class early. Why waste their’s and their student’s time if they couldn’t concentrate? In fact, with the constant short classes, (Y/N) shouldn’t have been surprised to see Charles stroll into their classroom. 

“(Y/N), may I speak with you?” Charles asked once it was apparent that (Y/N) was too wrapped up in their thoughts to notice Charles.

“Hmm? Oh, sorry Charles, I’m just a bit distracted, what’s up?” They asked. (Y/N) sat at their desk hoping the steady position will get them to focus on Charles.

“It’s come to my attention that you’ve been letting the students out of class early the past few days, is anything the matter?” Charles asked. 

“Oh, uh, no, I just, I’ve been distracted lately is all,” (Y/N)’s cheeks flushed in shame. They couldn’t let this issue affect their job any more than it already has.

“Distracted… by anything in particular?” He moved his wheelchair closer to (Y/N).

(Y/N) shifted so they could face Charles, “Is Erik okay?”

Charles raised his brows, “Why wouldn’t he be?” 

“No reason, I just haven’t seen him is all, I was concerned,” (Y/N) shrugged. Maybe Erik really was avoiding them.

“He’s fine. I mean he was acting odd around me as well, but he said he was distracted. Seems to be a lot of that going on around here these days,” Charles nudged (Y/N)’s hand with a teasing smile.

(Y/N) huffed a small laugh, “I suppose I’m not the only one,” they drummed their fingers on their lap, “Don’t laugh, but I think Erik might be avoiding me and I’m kind of afraid that it might actually be true.”

“I won’t laugh at that, but Erik is a complex person. Sometimes he feels the need to isolate himself when he’s troubled, that could be why he’s been staying away,” Charles shrugged.

Charles had a point, Erik didn’t seem the type to confide in someone if something was troubling him. 

Charles grabbed (Y/N)’s hand, “I hope everything works itself out, can’t have my best teacher struggling.”

(Y/N) smiled gratefully at Charles’s blatant concern. He was their best friend and they knew he was merely concerned for them. Before they could respond with reassurance, however, Erik stepped into the classroom.

“Oh, sorry, I- sorry,” Erik ran his hand through his hair, “Can I ask,” He pointed from Charles to (Y/N) “are you… do you two- Anything happening here?” 

(Y/N)’s brows furrowed at the question, “anything like what?”

Charles snorted with laughter next to them. He waved his hand as if to apologize but the laughter bubbling from his lips made it hard to believe. “What?” (Y/N) frowned.

Charles dropped (Y/N)’s hand and huffed softly, “Nothing, darling. Erik, a word if  you please?” Charles maneuvered his wheelchair outside of (Y/N)’s classroom. 

(Y/N) watched as Erik walked out after Charles with a look of confusion. Was there something they weren’t getting?

_____________________________________________________________

Erik has had a rough couple of days. Before, Erik would usually brush off any inconvenience and continue with his day. But ever since he met (Y/N) it’s been a little more difficult to ignore the problem at hand. And that problem came in the form of one Charles Xavier. Erik knew someone as wonderful as (Y/N) had to be taken, but taken by Charles? Not that Charles wasn’t a good person, he was the best person Erik knew, he just really hated that of all people, (Y/N) was dating Charles; his best friend.  

When Erik first met (Y/N) he knew there was something special about them, and not just because of their power. No, (Y/N) was the most caring, funny, and charming person he has ever had the pleasure of meeting. They always made sure to include Erik when he first arrived, and they made sure that he wasn’t feeling neglected. These small acts of kindness were enough to make Erik fall for them. But again, (Y/N) was with Charles. 

At first, Erik thought he could ignore his feelings and simply brush them aside. But that was easier said than done. (Y/N) was always on his mind. Whenever he was in class, in the danger room, driving. There was no escaping (Y/N). So, Erik accepted his fate and became their friend; Only now he’d see Charles around more often, and he’d feel guilty for even fantasizing about (Y/N). Erik was living in hell.

The other day, Erik had the intention of telling Charles how he felt about (Y/N). When he walked into the living room, both (Y/N) and Charles were sat by the fireplace, talking and laughing. He realized he couldn’t get in the way of their relationship. He couldn’t leave again though, it didn’t sit well with him. Instead, Erik chose to avoid both Charles and (Y/N). Whenever he would see (Y/N), he’d turn the other way and pretend like they weren’t there. He altered his route so he wouldn’t run the risk of running into them. When he saw Charles, Erik would find a way out of the conversation and avoid him as well. 

This had been going on for a week now. But even avoiding (Y/N) was like torture; he missed them. He wanted to see them smile when he said hello; he wanted to see them laugh when he told a joke. He missed them. So he went to find them. But when he did, they were with Charles. He didn’t know why he felt so disappointed. He had foolishly hoped to get some alone time with (Y/N). 

It got to the point where Erik had finally asked if (Y/N) and Charles were in fact in a relationship; It sure seemed like it. He shifted nervously in place, avoiding Charles’s eyes. He wished he was using his helmet right now. 

“Erik, tell me, do you like (Y/N)?” Charles asked casually.

“What would make you think that?” He mumbled.

“Oh, I don’t know, perhaps it’s the disappearing act you seem to pull whenever we’re together or the fact that you haven’t spoken to me or them in days?” Charles raised his brows accusingly. He obviously wasn’t as in the dark as Erik had hoped.

“Maybe I just don’t like talking to you?” Erik shrugged.

Charles rolled his eyes, “Please if that were true I’d have known long ago.”

Erik ran his hand through his hair, “What if I did? There’s no chance for me, I know that. And I would never do anything to jeopardize our friendship.”

Charles smiled, “Well, I’m glad to hear that, but there is something you should know. (Y/N) and I aren’t together.”

Erik frowned, “Did you two break up?”

Charles chuckled, “No, you git, we were never together. We’re just friends. I promise. And if it helps, I’m pretty sure they like you too.”

“Really?” Erik grinned. It seemed he could only string together unintelligent answers now that he knew (Y/N) was single.

“Would I lie to you?” At Erik’s look, Charles rolled his eyes, “When it counts?”

“No, I suppose not,” Erik cleared his throat and finally met Charles’s eyes, “Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s someone I should talk to,” He pointed to (Y/N)’s classroom door behind him with his thumb.

“Definitely. I’d wish you luck, but I am positive this will go well for you both,” Charles winked and left Erik to talk to (Y/N).

Erik took a deep breath and re-entered the classroom.

(Y/N) looked up from fiddling with their fingers when he walked in. They smiled when they saw it was him. It was a pleasant surprise. They had expected Charles to come in. “Erik, it’s been a minute.”

Erik shrugged, “Yeah, I wanted to apologize for that. I uh, may I sit?” He motioned to the seat near their desk.

(Y/N) nodded seeming eager.

Erik pulled the chair closer to (Y/N) and took a seat. “First off, I wanted to apologize for my behavior. I shouldn’t have been avoiding you.”

“So you were avoiding me?” (Y/N) asked. 

“Yes, but not because I don’t like you,” Erik rushed when he noticed the disappointed look on their face, “I like you a lot actually. That’s why I’ve been avoiding you.”

“That makes absolutely no sense.” (Y/N) crossed their arms over their chest, “You don’t avoid people you claim to like.”

“That’s a good point, but in my defense, I thought you were dating my best friend.” He drummed his fingers on his thighs, “I know it seems stupid now. I feel stupid, but it only seemed logical at the time.”

(Y/N) smiled and shifted closer to Erik so their knees were touching, “You were jealous of Charles?” 

“I know, I know. I’m an idiot, but you had to see how close you two are,” Erik defended.

(Y/N) laughed but nodded in agreement, “Okay, I forgive you.” They took Erik’s fidgeting hands into their own, “And if it helps, I like you too.”

Erik beamed, “It does.”

“Good,” (Y/N) let go of one hand and laced their fingers together with the hand they still held, “Now, ask me on a date so we can stop being idiots.”

Erik laughed happily, “very well. (Y/N), would you like to go on a date with me?”

“Erik, this is so sudden,” (Y/N) teased.

Erik rolled his eyes fondly, “Yeah, only took me a couple of months to get the courage to ask you out.”

(Y/N) bit their lip, “I’d love to go out Erik.” They leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Erik’s cheek. 

“It’s about damn time,” Charles’s voice echoed in both mutant’s minds. 

[seravph]

Hi, I didn't really know who to reach out for this question, but do you have any tips on how to find your own unique fashion style? I'm not really looking to hop on popular clothing trends on social media e.g. eboy/girl or cottagecore, so I'm not exactly sure where to start! I come to consult you because I've seen some of your posts and you look very well versed in fashion and you seem to know your own personal style. My wardrobe is very outdated and I would like to update it to reflect the truest expression of myself. Thank you 😊 You don't have to answer this if you don't feel like doing so btw 😅

EEEE more fashion asks i love these thank you!!!! warning this got a lil (very) long so its under the cut :^)

so first and foremost the most important part about curating your own style is to learn more about your body and what flatters/doesnt flatter it. it's learning some basic fashion 'rules' pertaining to proportions, cuts, etc. there are plenty of resources on this if you dont know where to start (kibbe body test, video, video) but keep in mind this step has nothing to do with your weight!!!! i could talk wayyy more about this but at the end of the day, some clothing is just more flattering for specific body shapes - that doesnt mean you cant wear something that isnt perfectly flattering, but knowing your body and knowing what flatters it will make you understand your own style and help guide the pieces you buy. fashion 'rules' arent necessarily meant to be followed, but just understood so that 'breaking' them is a conscious choice. (it also really helped with my insecurities???? like this step is basically recognizing that its not your body thats unflattering, its the clothing, if that makes sense???)

also remember that every 'style' works for every body type. i.e if you want to be a 60s vibe but youre too curvy for shift dresses, there are plenty of clothes in a similar style that would look great on you <3 basically, if you dont like the way a piece looks on you, you can still achieve the same vibe with a different article of clothing thats more flattering. but also umm.... you can just wear the unflattering thing if you want LOL if it makes you happy... then it becomes your own controlled decision <3 live love laugh follow your heart

okay. now that you have that out of the way. there are a million ways to develop a sense of style, and no particular order in which i recommend them. what i love doing is creating pinterest boards for the spring/summer or fall/winter seasons and just filling them with pieces i would wear in a perfect world. i dont mean like cottagecore aesthetic boards, just boards full of runway looks and clothing pngs that i like. i also love making little outfits for characters which can influence my own style. everyone thinks of their style differently; i think of my own outfits as little vignettes with narratives behind them, but other people are more concerned with just wearing things they think are pretty, other people view it as an expression of art or their identity, and other people just want to feel comfortable!!! its all up to you and what youre drawn to!!

one thing that tan france mentioned once was to go online window shopping by going onto the website for a brand you like (regardless of whether its affordable or realistic!) and just adding things to your cart that youre interested in. dont worry about how expensive they are or anything, and when youre done, remove all the items you like the least. and then keep reviewing and removing until you have just a handful of really nice items you really like, and keep doing this with other brands until you can identify common threads between the pieces you like. you dont have to buy them!! in fact maybe its better if you dont!!! and the websites dont have to be like zara or h&m ... go on balmain or chanel if you want, play pretend and have fun!!

re: the last bullet point, i think a big turn off for people in terms of fashion is the idea that you need to wear something palatable and 'appropriate.' its like looking at a runway and thinking "its nice, but i would never wear that in real life." but honestly????? in a perfect world i would be wearing full gowns to the supermarket!!!! if your ideal style is imaginative but unattainable, your style in practice will be a microcosm of it. basically... dream big... dont be afraid to 'overdress' if its what you like!! one of the best pieces of advice i ever got was from my aunt, who offered to by me a plastic tiara. i asked her when i was ever going to wear it irl, and she just looked at me and said "??? you can wear it whenever you want to!!" so true!!! wear a tutu to mcdonalds. wear a bedazzled tux to prom. who cares

accessories, nail polish, hair, jewelry, perfume and makeup goes a long way in developing style. i dont wear a ton of makeup, but just putting some color on my cheeks achieves a kind of sunkissed lovestruck vibe that i strive for. i paint my nails red because i think its chic or bright colors so they contrast with a toned down outfit. even wearing no accessories is an accessory in itself. accessorizing (or specifically not accessorizing) is like adding texture to an outfit imo

anything that advises you about 'absolutely necessary essentials everyone needs' is entirely wrong. there is no one size fits all; i.e everyone says you need one good pair of denim jeans, but i havent worn jeans in two years!!! an essential for ME is a pair of neutral wool shorts, but an essential for another person could be a thick knit sweater or for another person, a flannel. the idea that everyone needs a 'little black dress' or a 'basic white t shirt' is preposterous. YOUR essentials depend entirely on YOUR style. a pair of denim jeans is useless if you hate wearing jeans!!!!

as for my personal style, im mostly influenced by movies, books, songs, characters, feelings, colors, high fashion, and costumes. ultimately, you should worry less about what you want to be and worry more about what you already like. every piece i have kind of plays into some narrative ive constructed, or otherwise theyre all special to me :) if you want to update your wardrobe, dont feel the need to over consume fast fashion (or any fashion for that matter) to do so. if you take it slow and buy pieces you really love, every item will have a story and you'll begin to develop a more stable internal style and they'll last longer :)

let me know if you have questions or want me to talk more about any of this because i really love answering these kinds of questions!!!!!! especially the body type thing because thats such an important but long winded thing i couldnt really fit it all LOL

some more videos + resources about style and fashion i think are interesting:

deep dive into kibbe body types

pinterest aesthetics, fatphobia, and white washing

lies about clothes to unlearn in your twenties

studio ghibli: how clothing shapes identity

breakfast at tiffanys style analysis: the reinvention of onself with fashion

will the millennial aesthetic ever end?

go viral, post #spon, get canceled: how social media transformed fashion in the 2010s

analyzing the "is it a cute outfit or is she just skinny?" meme

[mallowstep]

(insurance claim)

Mistyfoot paces in their bedroom, waiting for someone to pick up her call. The first hints of dawn show below their curtains, and Mistyfoot finds herself peeking through them as she waits.

The phone finally picks up.

* * *

"I'll be fine," Feathertail says. "Shadepelt will watch the kids and I feel fine enough."

Mistyfoot sighs. "Are you sure? I can--"

"I'm sure. Stonefur is here most of today, and if things get worse, I'll call you, I promise."

Mistyfoot searches Feathertail's face. She's being sincere, but Mistyfoot walked her to the bathroom and she sat down to brush her teeth. Mistyfoot wants to stay home with her, because she wants to, because Feathertail doesn't tell the others when she needs something, because Mistyfoot is always afraid of comining home and finding Feathertail worse, but she doesn't have enough days off to stay home every time Feathertail has a bad day, and she can read between the lines. Tomorrow might be worse.

"You'll tell them if you need something?"

Feathertail nods. "Promise."

Mistyfoot sighs, kissing her forehead. "Okay. I'll try to come home early."

* * *

One more month, and then it's been a year, and she can request more time.

* * *

Stonefur is hiding something from her.

Mistyfoot waits until it's just the two of them, Feathertail and Stormheart playing outside with the triplets, and then she confronts him about it.

"I'm not hiding anything."

"You are." She raises her eyebrows. "I've known you your whole life, Stonefur, I know you."

Stonefur sighs. "Misty -- I'm not hiding anything. I just...it's complicated."

"You're literally refusing to talk about something."

He looks away from her, then rolls his shoulders. "Leopardstar called me a few weeks ago. I've -- I went...I don't know." He sighs. "We got coffee. That's all."

Mistyfoot nods. "How was it?"

"I don't know. It's a lot, Mistyfoot, and I don't...I'm not ready to talk about this, okay?" He puts his hand to his chest, and Mistyfoot knows he's looking for a ring that isn't there. She hasn't asked him why.

"You know you can talk to me, right?"

"I...it's not about that." He sighs. "Look, I don't -- I don't know, and I can't..." Stonefur looks back at her. "I need to figure this out for myself first, okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

"Okay," Stormheart says, "so normally, this joystick does walking, and this one is the cursor. But we can switch them."

"Well, you're going to do the cursor, right?"

"Yeah, unless you want to. And then we'd switch them."

Feathertail shrugs. "Keep explaining."

"Okay, this button is the one that does an action -- you'll see, when we get going. And that one is the menu, and..."

Mistyfoot smiles. She has no idea what game they're playing, but Greystripe bought them it, and Stormheart spent this morning learning how to play.

"This is your character -- we can change it later, though."

"I want it to look like me."

"Yeah, you can do that. Do you want me to put in your name and stuff first?"

Feathertail nods.

Stormheart fiddles with his controller, asking Feathertail a few more questions, and Mistyfoot takes a quick photo, sending it to Greystripe.

i think theyre having fun

His typing bubble pops up almost immediately.

I'm glad. Thanks for letting me know.