#house husband simon

[sweet-as-an-angel]

Househubby Simon would be better than any thief deterrent out there. But god forbid the poor burglar unfortunate enough to break into Simon’s mini mansion. Instantly went from househusband to Lieutenant mode lol.

Like excuse me?!?? Breaking into MY house??? That my wife worked so hard for??? And trying to steal HER stuff?? *clicks gun. Going dark.*

Also HC Simon spends parts of his allowance money on nice gun/knife collection. He has it stored in an organized basement. That burglar would be stupid to break into your house like that, hes going to be sent to the ICU for sure because Si wouldn’t let it slide like that. The police are more concerned why he has such big gun collection than the poor thief.

🪿

Warnings: Mentions of Break-Ins, Thievery, Simon being an absolute Weapon, Implied Injury, No Pronouns used for Reader Except 'You'.

🪿 Anon, you're so right for that; Simon is the BEST line of defence (not on the market) you can get for your home protection needs. He's a retired SAS soldier, of course he's absolutely goated in the art of protection and preservation.

God forbid the thief tries to steal something you bought for Simon; that's a one-way ticket to A&E - first class at that. Everything you've ever given him is worth more to Simon than its physical value (which, given your profession, is guaranteed to be hefty). Your gifts offer sentimental value; a luxury Simon never had before meeting you.

Sometimes, Simon hopes some poor soul will wander into his path so he has the chance to try out his new collection of weaponry he bought the other day 👀

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)

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[naivegh0ul]

OH SIMON IS SUCH A HUGE LACTATION GUY he'd go so far that he'd get a milk sore in his upper lip that when you go out grocery shopping with him and you bump in to one of your mom-friends who innocently comments on the blister, you'd have to slap a hand over his mouth before he says something preposterous in broad daylight.

can u tell im thinking about dad!simon all the time

Oh my god you are so right. now i'm picturing Simon walking around with a little milk sore on his lip and a chubby baby in his arms oh i'm gonna pass out 😵

He is so foul-mouthed it's unbelievable. He says what he wants, when he wants. It doesn't matter where you are, he'll say what he's thinking. God help you if someone asks about the sore on his lip, wincing and sympathising with Simon, but he just brushes it off and tries to explain that he got it from sucking his beautiful wife's tits.

You shut him up, of course. A hand slapped over his mouth and an awkward chuckle coming out of you. "You know how men are, always getting hurt from the simplest of things." You say with an awkward smile, watching Simon out of the corner of your eye.

You get out of the conversation quickly, ushering Simon away so you can scold him for being so brazen and bold. He just looks at you with that cocky, charming smirk and those loving eyes as he coos, "'S fine, mama, quit y'r worrying an' give me a kiss."

And his hands would snake up your shirt, groping your swollen, sensitive breasts over the fabric, not caring that you're in public and that people might see your devious husband squeezing and fondling your tits until milk spills out and stains your bra.

[shy-sapphic-ace]

List of queer books I read, loved & recommend!

(There isn't any particular order, I wrote these as I remembered them)

Master Of One - Jaida Jones & Dani Bennett (mlm, fantasy, very cool worldbuilding and magic system, funny, cool characters)

Legends & Lattes - Travis Baldree (wlw, fantasy, very soft & chill vibes)

The Priory of the Orange Tree - Samantha Shannon (wlw, high fantasy, cool worldbuilding, kinda reminds me of LOTR but with more dragons and feminism and lesbians)

Even Though I Knew The End - C.L. Polk (wlw, supernatural noir, cool 1930s detective story with angels & demons, I loved this one!)

The Love Interest - Cale Dietrich (mlm, science fiction, very cool concept)

The Darkest Part Of The Forest - Holly Black (side mlm, fantasy, cool fae lore)

The Weight Of The Stars - K. Ancrum (wlw, not quite science fiction but space stuff is involved, lovely and complex characters)

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe - Benjamin Alire Sáenz (mlm, fiction, very nice in general, there is also a sequel)

The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue - Mackenzi Lee (mlm, historical and vaguely fantasy, nice story but I preferred the sequel honestly)

The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy - Mackenzi Lee (wlw, the sequel to the one before, more fantasy elements than the first, asexual main character!!)

Gallant - V.E. Schwab (no romance, but in the background one of the characters(?) uses they/them pronouns, very cool dark fantasy vibe)

Stranger Than Fanfiction - Chris Colfer (gay main character, trans main character, coming-of-age, nice book)

Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda (yes it's the Love, Simon book, mlm, fiction, pretty nice)

They Both Die At The End - Adam Silvera (mlm, sci-fi ish but mostly fiction, cool ideas, but the ending is sad! Very amazing book though, I haven't read the prequel yet)

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo - Taylor Jenkins Reid (wlw, bi main character, historical fiction, cool story, just a neat book in general)

This Is How You Lose The Time War - Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone (wlw, sci-fi, very cool time travel stuff!! and very beautiful, it felt like reading poetry most of the time)

One Last Stop - Casey McQuinston (wlw, background trans & pan & queer characters, sci-fi or fantasy idk, but time travel, I loooved this book, great)

The House In The Cerulean Sea - TJ Klune (mlm, fantasy, THIS BOOK oh my gosh you should read it!!, just cute and lovely and good)

Under The Whispering Door - TJ Klune (mlm, fantasy, this book is also sooo amazing, great character development and awesome relationships and stuff, it's been a while since I read it but it was so good)

In the Lives of Puppets - TJ Klune (mlm, ace main character!!, sci-fi, now THIS is found family, oughh feelings. argh, tj klune you’ve done it again, a human and his family of funky robots… I love them)

And They Lived... - Steven Salvatore (nblm, fiction, about gender identity and learning to love yourself, read it a while ago but it was very nice)

I Wish You All The Best - Mason Deaver (nblm, fiction, about finding your identity and people who care about you, very cute and sweet)

The Song Of Achilles - Madeleine Miller (mlm, historical, very good in general)

Carry On - Rainbow Rowell (mlm, background wlw in the third book, fantasy, it's a trilogy, basically Harry Potter if it was gay and also better)

Silver In The Wood - Emily Tesh (mlm, fantasy, very pretty, lots of fae stuff and lovely descriptions, it has a really good sequel too)

Pretty much anything by Alice Oseman (all cute and lovely and great, though I've only read Radio Silence so far I hear only good things, Solitaire is on my to-read list)

I Kissed Shara Wheeler - Casey McQuinston (wlw, fiction, it's been a while but I liked this book)

The Falling In Love Montage - Ciara Smyth (wlw, fiction, this book was so cute and funny and deeply emotional it made me Feel way too many things, I'd definitely recommend it)

What Big Teeth - Rose Szabo (a bit of queerness all around, fantasy, werewolves and monsters, this one was pretty cool!, lots of original ideas for the world/character building)

His Quiet Agent - Ada Maria Soto (mlm, asexual, fiction, about like spies but this book was so gentle and sweet I wanted to cry in the best way possible)

Some By Virtue Fall - Alexandra Rowland (wlw, historical fiction(?), theatre drama!! rival romance!! duels!!, a very good read in general)

Don’t Want You Like a Best Friend - Emma R. Alban (wlw, historical fiction, I’m not usually one for regency romances, but I really liked this!!, very cute and lots of drama, and there’s a sequel coming out soon!)

[empresskylo]

I'm dying of food poisoning and pre-menstrual pain but the only thing on my mind is soldier!reader with a 141 house!husband ??? 😶🥺 I can't explain how this works, what do you think?

all i can picture is ghost in a little maid outfit 😭

OK BUT IMAGINE ALL THE DUMB DOMESTIC THINGS THEY'D DO, LIKE PRICE BRINGING YOU LUNCH BECAUSE HE NOTICED YOU DIDN'T PACK IT ONE DAY. or soap facetiming you while you're deployed whining about how much he misses you. or simon always being worried for your safety and how angry he'd get whenever you come home with bruises/wounds. gaz having dinner ready when you get home and somehow always knowing exactly what you were craving. alejandro insiting on driving you every day and getting irritatingly mad when you let it slip that one of your male teammates gets referred to as your work husband. konig sending you photos of his day while you're at work, like him walking the dog, him at the grocery store holding one of your favorite food items in his hand. and all the men would rub your feet or back every night, listening to you rant about your day before you're snoring face down in the pillows.

[ohbo-ohno]

for ypur 1k game can i get a "lady of the house" + ghoap💋

1k game here - no more please!

you said lady so im assuming you meant ghoap x reader <3

2.5k of a kinda historical au ft. flirty stablehand johnny x kinda shy reader x very horny simon (cw for oral sex in a public place, though there's no audience except a few horses)

Your husband's staff seems to have no concept of propriety.

No, no, that's not fair to most of the servants. Your husband's stablehand has no concept of propriety.

You'd complain to Simon, but he's hardly around to find most days. While the two of you share a bedchamber, that's nearly the only time you see him. You're lucky to even share a meal with the man, these days. The housekeeper tells you he's holed up in his office more often than not, and that feels like a clear sign that he would rather not be bothered. You two aren't particularly close, so you're more than content to find other ways of amusing yourself.

You've spent most of your time since moving into the manor with your mare, a gift from husband on your wedding night. She's a lovely beast and you've found great joys on long rides with her, despite the persistent ache in your thighs recently.

But that stablehand... Johnny's too handsome for his own good and he knows it, more than willing to flirt with you even though his own master has a claim, and too skilled for you to really ignore.

You hate that you've become so endeared to him, but it's impossible to ignore his flirtatious remarks. You've been a bit starved for affection since your marriage, and Johnny really isn't bad company by any means.

In fact, as much as you know you shouldn't, you can't help but feel a bit excited as you venture down to the stables to go on your daily ride.

You're halfway there when you're joined by someone new, a large figure suddenly walking shoulder to shoulder with you. He nearly makes you jump out of you skin, but you calm a bit at the sight of your elusive husband.

"Oh!" You gasp, pressing a hand over your chest. "You nearly gave me a heart attack."

He inclines his head a bit, wrapping one hand around your elbow as you continue to walk. "My apologies. I thought I might join you on your ride today."

You're not sure how he knew where you'd be, but you take the new company in stride. "I'd enjoy that."

You're silent for the rest of the walk, not entirely comfortable in this veritable stranger's presence quite yet. Your spouse is an intimidating man, and you've hardly spent any time with him, so there's very little comfort to be found in his presence. What little time you have spent together has been in the bedroom and well... if you think of that for too long you'll go red in the face.

"Ah, the lady of the house!" Johnny calls as you enter the stables, stepping away from your mare. "You're late, my lady."

You giggle a bit at his tease. "My apologies, Johnny, I didn't realize you were on a schedule."

His smile grows and he leans against the gate to one of the stalls. "I simply have certain expectations of you, my lady - you're quite the creature of habit."

"You two have gotten close, then?" Your husband asks, and you're swiftly reminded of his presence. Your face flames at how easily you'd shown your friendship with Johnny off in front of a man you're meant to marry.

"I'm sorry," you demure, glancing up at Simon and feeling relief when you find him looking merely curious, not angry. "Johnny's- Mr. MacTavish has been helping me learn to take care of the mare you gifted me, and we've... developed a bit of a friendship in our afternoons spent together."

Simon hums, nodding to himself as his eyes flick between you and the stablehand. The only sign that Johnny is even the slightest bit fazed is the way he straightens up from where he was leaning, back straight and shoulders rolled back.

"No disrespect meant, sir," he apologizes. "Your wife is a lovely creature, I couldn't resist getting to know her a bit better."

"Yes, she is quite enchanting," Simon says quietly, guiding you a bit closer to Johnny. "You're unmarried, aren't you Johnny?"

He nods, and the two of you share a slightly confused look.

"And do you have any prospects?"

Johnny clears his throat, a tinge of red lighting up his cheeks. "No, sir."

Simon hums again, his thumb stroking over the crook of your elbow.

"Have you been taking care of my wife in my absence, Johnny?"

Now he really does blush, and you feel the same heat race through your own face.

"Only..." he clears his throat again, shifting his weight. "Only in ways entirely appropriate, sir, I promise."

"Oh, I don't doubt that. You're a good worker, a good boy, I can tell."

You're not entirely sure what's going on. The tone of voice Simon has adopted is near salacious, a tone you recognize from the few times the two of you have preformed your marital duties together. The tone sets your heart racing, a slightly uncomfortable awareness settling over you.

"Thank- thank you, sir."

"Do you know how to properly take care of a woman?"

"Simon, I'm not sure-" you try to interrupt, uncomfortable with the direction the conversation seemed to be heading.

"Hush, darling, I'm only asking the boy a question. Well, Johnny?"

Poor Johnny's face is as red as a tomato, and you'd tease him if you weren't sure you looked the same.

"Well, sir, I've... I've never had a woman of my own to take care of, but I try my best."

"Oh I'm sure you do."

Simon's contemplative look is a little concerning, so you tug on his hand just a bit. "I'd like to ride today, Simon, if you're ready?"

"In a moment," he dismisses, giving you a soft pat on the shoulder with his free hand. "Would you like to learn how to take care of a woman, Johnny?"

"Simon," you hiss, sure that he's not implying what you think he is.

He looks down at you with an innocent if slightly confused face. "What, darling? The boy needs to learn at some point."

"Not-" you clear your throat, glancing at a very confused looking Johnny from the corner of your eye. "Simon, not here."

"Oh, come off it," he scoffs, a soft smile tilting up his lips. "Is that truly your only complaint? The location? My dear, no one will see us this far out but the trees and the horses. Well," he glances over to the stablehand. "And our Johnny, of course."

"I'm sure he's familiar with how to... take care of a woman."

"I'm not," Johnny blurts, then clamps his lips shut tightly together. His blush spreads down to his neck, and you worry the poor thing might just explode.

"See? So, Johnny, would you like to learn how to care for a woman? I'm sure my lovely wife would be more than happy to introduce you to the pleasures."

Your blush doesn't calm, but looking at Johnny... the idea isn't entirely off-putting.

Johnny's about as handsome as a man can be, and if Simon has no compunctions to sharing a bit of your pleasure... well, you've always been a bit of a glutton.

Johnny seems about as unbothered by the idea as you are.

"Really, sir? You'd let me... you'd let her teach me?"

Simon laughs a little, stepping closer to Johnny and turning you so you're shoulder to shoulder with him. "Oh, I'll be doing the teaching, boy. She's just out practice doll, yes?"

That makes your breath hitch, the idea of being just a thing between the two handsome men a bit more pleasing than it should be.

"Now," Simon says, gripping you suddenly by the waist and lifting without warning. He sets you onto a wooden table, then spreads your legs. "Women's clothing can be quite annoying to work around, but the end result is more than worth it. Hold your skirts for us, love, thattagirl."

You're silent as you take the layers of clothing from your husband, afraid that if you speak you'll simply burst into flames. Exposing yourself to a man like this is difficult enough in the dark of your bedchamber, it feels near impossible in front of Johnny and in broad daylight.

But you can feel the way your center grows slick, so you obey your husband.

"Now, Johnny, kneel here, in front of me."

Johnny nearly scrambles to where Simon gestures, almost throwing himself to his knees in front of you. He's left between your thighs and Simon's legs, your husband almost stradling his back.

Simon laughs a bit. "Eager, are we?"

"Yes- yes, sir." Johnny pants a bit, staring up at you from the floor. He can't seem to decide whether he'd like to look at your undergarments or your face, eyes flicking between the two.

"Good lad," Simon brushes a hand over the back of Johnny's head, palming it. "Now, you'll have to take off her undergarments before anything else."

You shift a little in your spot as Johnny reaches up tentatively, eyebrows slightly furrowed. His hands brush over your bottom half for several long seconds, and you start to shift a little more, near whining.

"Hurry now, Johnny, you'll drive the poor thing mad."

He adopts an almost determined expression, and a moment later you hear a rip and feel a breeze against your most sensitive parts.

"Johnny!" You scold, leaning far enough forward to glare down at the man.

He flinches a little, sinking away. "I'm sorry, my lady. I didn't know how else to get them off!"

"You never destroy a woman's clothing like that! You're not off to a very good start so far."

You regret the words a bit when Johnny's face drops, his lip poking out in a slight pout.

Simon laughs, shifting to rub a hand over your bared knee. "Let up on him, darling, he's inexperienced. Besides, it's rather easy to make up for a few ripped seams."

You glare lightly at Simon, just to make sure he knows you're unamused, then lean back to relax against the wall. "Well, then you'd better get started."

Johnny looks up at Simon, neck craning back. "How...?"

Another rough chuckle from your husband, and he shoves Johnny forward by the back of the head until his face is buried between your thighs.

"Oh!" You yelp.

"With your mouth, Johnny. Trust me, it's far easier to learn to use your tongue like this than it is to learn how a lady likes her apologies."

You shoot an unimpressed look up to Simon, but it quickly melts off your face when you feel Johnny's lips and nose press to your center. He doesn't really do anything, just sort of stays there.

You shift again, try to press forward.

"Lick her, Johnny," Simon explains, putting a bit more pressure on the back of the stablehand's head. A moment later, there's a tentative brush across your folds.

You jolt a bit at the first tough, then relax into the second. Johnny's clumsy but confident, and you spread your legs a bit wider so he can fully explore you.

"Lift your skirts a bit further, love, I can't see," Simon instructs, leaning over so he's hovering directly above Johnny. You obey, and your husband hums as the view.

"Do you see the little bud at the top there, Johnny? Focus in on that, it's what gives women pleasure."

Johnny's evidently a quick study, as he focuses his attentions onto your clitoris as soon as the instructions are out of Simon's mouth. "Oh!" You gasp, back shooting up from the wall.

It takes him several long minutes to figure out what keeps you moaning in pleasure rather than whining in frustration, but once he does he keeps his tongue stroking in just the right way to make you go boneless.

"Attaboy, there you go," Ghost praises, stroking over the stripe of hair on Johnny's head. "Hear her moanin'? That means you're making' her feel good, so keep going."

He's a good listener, Johnny, and you're nearly brought to a peak with just his tongue alone.

"Add a finger now," Simon says.

Johnny pulls back just far enough for you to see his confusion. "A finger, sir?"

Simon huffs out a laugh, reaching down to grab Johnny's right wrist and pull it to your bared core. "Yes, Johnny, a finger. You put one or two into her hole to stretch her out enough to take you. Now, you won't be fucking my wife today, but the stretch will still feel good for her."

The way he talks about you like you're not even there combined with the sudden slow stretch of Johnny's fingers has you moaning. If you were even slightly more aware of anything but the two men in front of you, you'd worry about being heard. As it is, the attention returning to your clit keeps you suitably distracted.

Simon scoffs in front of you, tugging Johnny's hair a bit in reprimand. "You have to move the finger, boy, you can't just set it in there and do nothing. C'mon, push it in and out a bit."

"Yes, sir," Johnny pants, glancing up at you past all the skirts. "Sorry, my lady."

"That's- that's alright," you excuse, trying to keep your voice steady. Judging by the smirk on your husband's face, you're not particularly successful.

You let yourself float off in the pleasure for a bit, smiling gently at the cautious movements of Johnny's finger - he almost seems scared to hurt you, and you can't help but be endeared to the stablehand all over again.

"Look at that," Simon sighs, his hand moving further up on your thigh. "Hear how wet she is? Means she's ready for another finger. Go on, Johnny. Stretch her out some more."

The two fingers are enough to get you off - all that attention focused right on your clit and just enough of a stretch for you to feel. You come with quiet moans, shifting your hips forward into Johnny's lips as much as you can.

He doesn't slow or change his motions at all, and you ride the orgasm to completion happily. After, though, you can't help but whine at the overstiumlation.

"Alright, pull off now, Johnny. You hear those noises? Those mean she doesn't feel good anymore."

Johnny almost jerks away from you, glancing up at you with wide eyes. "I'm sorry, my lady," he quickly apologizes, rising up on his knees to get closer as you drop your skirts. "I didn't meant to hurt you."

You smile softly at him, reaching down to cup his cheek. "You didn't, Johnny, it's alright. Just a bit too much."

He nods as he leans into your hold, and the three of you rest in silence for a few moments.

Eventually Simon tugs you off of the table, pulling both you and Johnny into his arms for a half-hug. It's nice - your husband isn't too much of a fan of physical contact, so you relish in it when you can.

Johnny coughs a bit with a blush when you all three finally seperate. "So... when's my next lesson?"

You smirk as you loop arms with Simon, both of you sharing an amused glance.

"Come to our chambers anytime, Johnny," you offer, patting him on the chest before stepping away. "I'm sure my husband wouldn't mind giving a longer demonstration on how to fully pleasure a woman."

You leave a red-faced Johnny in the stables with tented pants, both you and Simon chuckling to yourselves as you head back to the manor.

[bizarreshiz]

Heehee :3 (this will either reach the right people or im getting judged 😭)

(Template under cut)

[nobodiesheartlessshitblog45]

Men I am attracted to.

[snorlax-bubbles]

HAAAAIIII I WANT HOUSE HUSBAND GHOST, LIKE LIKE RETIRED GHOST (cough cough dad bod ghost cough)

I hope i did this prompt justice :’) (ALSO HIII TO YOU TOO)

Also the context, is i feel like if Ghost was retired he would wanna live in a small town away from so many people, cause i feel like he would feel safer that way, and that small town would have a bakery, where he loves to eat at.. He would definitely either be a black coffee drinker, nice tea, or a sugary drink (im thinking a mocha) (depends on how people headcanon him). And hes a regular there, so that cafes baked goods have definitely caused him to have a constant sweet tooth!! Which without having to keep up with his fitness for the military, he allows himself the luxury of sweet treats!

[ilikebooksmoviesseriesandanime]

“i wouldn’t marry “i’d marry you

me either” w paper rings”

(we can all agree the lyrics are about & for them)

[finedinereception]

ice king is the one who cooks most of the meals. either because magic queen isnt home or because shes spending the night in the library doing research. theyll just sit together, have dinner, and she’ll be writing up a draft for her next book while hes writing fanfiction.

[sweet-as-an-angel]

Housewifey Simon would be so proud and giggly when he see the wedding photo placed next to reader’s diplomas/degrees. Med school is hard and some people choose to do a master’s before applying. Residency is competitive to match, I heard some people even squeeze in 1 or 2 PhD’s in between that time.

So imagine Simon seeing his picture placed next to reader’s multiple degrees and it always makes him perk his chest a little becausec he feels so proud.

TROPHY HOUSEHUSBAND SIMON YA’LL🪿💕

Because he absolutely WOULD- he's just so proud of you for achieving as much as you have, and the fact that he gets to support you on your journey to occupational greatness is the greatest gift he can ask for 💕.

He definitely gloats (not-so-subtly) to the rest of the 141 that you're academically and professionally goated, that you're the best in your field in such-and-such. He just can't help himself - the look on Johnny's face as Simon recounts for the fifth time how you've attained the very heights of grandeur by being the best at your craft is too great to pass up.

And the fact that the photo of you and him sits so close to them - so close to the evidence of your achievements - makes him feel loved. Cherished. He feels as if this marriage is your conjoined achievement. One that he holds as his highest and brightest honour <3

[solivagantingrebel]

I didn't realise how much my soul ™️ needed to write domestic fluff until I started working on the wip again. Ghoap fluff can fix me.

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

anyway back to thinking about fionna and cake for the night because simon compels me

[mercerislandbooks]

50 Years of Island Books: Our Sales Reps

In this installment, we’re seeing Island Books through the eyes of our sales reps. Dan Christiaens, Christine Foye, David Glenn and Kurtis Lowe all have decades-long relationships with Island Books, with lots of stories to share.

Miriam: Welcome Dan, Christine, David, and Kurtis! I'm excited to talk to all of you. As key sales reps for the big publishing houses, you've all had long-standing relationships with Island Books, and we wouldn't be the place we are today without your contributions. Tell me some stories! It can be about your first impression of the store, how you came to work with us, a particular title that did well at Island Books, or any other fond memories.

Dan Christiaens (Norton): I’ll start off. It was around 20 years ago that I started covering accounts in the PNW. I was still living in SoCal. Island Books was on my account list so on my first trip I stopped by and met Roger. He was pretty terse, made it clear that he didn’t see reps, but would review my stuff and send me an order for anything that he wanted. The store was lovely, well curated, with the typewriters all over and a small music section featuring CD’s, which caught my attention. I would stop by the store when I was in town, say hello, and always buy a CD or two.

When I moved up here in 2004, I started visiting the store more regularly, chatting with Cindy or Nancy, or even Roger—and would buy a CD or order some music that I wanted that they didn’t carry, and began to suggest music they should be aware of. Then our books became the topic of conversation, and I started recommending various books of ours. Roger slowly came to respect my knowledge of our books—and we became friendly, and then MAGIC HAPPENED! And he started ordering from me!

Christine Foye (Simon & Schuster): Here's one of my favorite photos of all time, a picture of Laurie, Taylor Jenkins Reid, and me on tour for the hardcover of The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Which leads me to.... 

A book that did especially well at the store and why—The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo! Laurie and Victor came to the prepub dinner that I had for TJR in Seattle. Laurie immediately embraced the book and shared it and hyped it and talked nonstop about it until finally pub day came and by gum, Island Books was outselling all of my other accounts within a month. This was the perfect storm of great book, passionate reader and responsive customer base. It's wonderful to find a book one can really get behind, and Laurie and the whole staff did that with this marvelous novel. Also, don't we look lovely in green? 

Remembering my first days selling to Island Books—I started selling to Roger in 1993. I knew nothing about anything, I was fresh out of the St. Martin's Press office in New York, selling trade paperbacks and mass markets and children's books and perfectly confident in my ignorance. Roger made short work of my inexperience but was kind about it, and commented on how I tidied up the store shelves and faced out titles. Had I worked in a bookstore, he asked. I sure had, and after that things were always affectionate between us in the Roger way. Which is to say, he let me sit and chatter for probably 10 minutes longer than he would have otherwise. And often I got a laugh out of him, which was wondrous. We did bond over having both been to Newfoundland — did you know he co-edited a book about it titled Outport: Reflections from the Newfoundland Coast? He did. (It's out of print.) I always loved Island Books, it was a pleasure to visit and see what kind of books Roger had decided to buy for the community. What a lucky community. 

David Glenn (Penguin Random House): Durn, my first visit to the store was so long ago I’m not sure I can even dredge it up from my addled brain. If I had to guess, I’d say it was probably way back in the mid-90s? Of course that was back in the “Roger Days,” and I think it’s fair to say that, within our tightly-knit rep community, Roger was known as kind of a tough buyer. He relied a lot on jobbers and didn’t particularly like being “sold,” especially if it was by someone he felt perhaps didn’t necessarily measure up, or wasn’t sufficiently prepared to defend a title if questioned about it. Roger did not, as they say, suffer fools gladly and, quite honestly, I was pretty intimidated by him at first. He gave me a bit of a rough few seasons there at the beginning—always good-naturedly, for sure, but also making sure I understood who the buyer/owner was. Early on, though, I decided that I was going to do whatever it took to win Roger over. I was gonna get a belly laugh outta that guy one way or the other. So every season I made sure to bring my A-game, and began my campaign to be “welcomed” by Roger. It took me a lot longer than I thought it would—at least a couple years—but eventually, the respect I had for Roger as an owner and businessperson, was replaced by just the simple goodness of the man. I loved his dry sense of humor, and if you could coax it out of him, he had a truly impish grin. So Island Books at that point became one of my favorite stores to visit.

When Roger decided he’d had enough and it was time to sell, I was pretty bummed. And in what was an odd quirk of fate, the fellow that helped Laurie come to a decision about buying the store was an old fraternity brother of mine who lives on the island. Happily, Laurie and Victor have been the ideal stewards to move Island Books along, post-Roger. The store has always had a wonderful vibe, a superb staff, a great location, and a tremendously supportive community.

As far as books go, I have to mention a title I feel is perhaps the finest novel any of my imprints have published during my 34-odd years with Penguin Random House: The Heart’s Invisible Furies, by John Boyne. Full disclosure: Island Books has sold a solid, if unspectacular 40-plus copies of it since it came out in August of 2017. So, not a real barn-burner. But more than the “zero” it would have sold had Laurie not been willing to take a chance, and an example of the fruits of the give-and-take between a rep and a buyer. It may not have set the world afire, but my fervent hope is that it will remain a staple at the store for years to come.

In January of 2018, I hosted a dinner for three PRH authors: veteran Amy Bloom, and newcomers Tara Westover and Karen Cleveland. Both Laurie and Victor attended that dinner and, at one point, Victor noticed that while nearly everyone was chatting away left and right, Karen Cleveland was looking a little lost and forlorn (whoever the rep host was that night should have been paying more attention). So he marched right over and began chatting her up. Well, cutting to the chase, Victor read her debut thriller Need To Know (based on the author’s own experiences as a former CIA counterterrorism analyst) and made it his own personal crusade to make it an IB bestseller. In short order, IB sold over 70 hardcovers, and another 100+ more in paperback, which is just an outstanding result for a debut novel. Tara Westover’s singular memoir, Educated, also struck a chord with Laurie and Victor that night. And while it’s true the book was a massive bestseller for nearly every bookstore in America (spending over two years on the NYT hardcover bestseller list in hardcover no less), IB more than held their own and, in fact, really punched above their weight, selling nearly 600 copies in hardcover alone. This is the power of the independent bookstore in general, and the superpower of a store like Island Books. Every community in America should be so lucky to have such a store, and I can’t help but believe that if this were actually the case, the country would be a far less frightening and chaotic place.

Kurtis Lowe (Imprint Group): When I started as a commission rep back in 1997, I did not work with publishers that ranked for a meeting with Roger Page. However, in early 2001, I joined Book Travelers West, so Roger was ready to meet with me to scrutinize the lists of Workman, Ten Speed Press, Running Press, Watson-Guptill, and more. As I pitched book after book (only the best), Roger would pause before a title, pen hovering over the printed catalog page… sometimes he would he would score a one, for one copy... saved! It would have a chance. Two copies. Looking good! Three copies… just about as high as he would go with me. That is because local wholesalers had no better indie partner than Island Books when it came to restocking a title if it worked, and the high shelves were too full displaying vintage typewriters to make room for overstock.  Roger’s team could be on the phone minutes before the deadline and receive a shipment by the end of the day. An initial order of one, two or three copies of could become 20, 50, or 100s sold over time.

When a title did not make the grade, Roger was not cruel, as he slashed a diagonal across the page, but at least he was definitive: “Not quite,” he would state, and often add a helpful comment of feedback for the publisher.  Perhaps the greatest feeling of triumph as a rep was to throw a Hail Mary, one more point to get that book on the shelf, and Roger would page back, look again, squiggle out the slash and enter a number and circle it for order entry.

The times that Roger really went for a book were beautiful, and he was ready to do something a little special. Back in 2014, Island Books picked The Storied Life of A. J. Fikry for their April store pick. I committed to touring Gabrielle Zevin to 27 Pacific Northwest bookstores in three days to celebrate this gift to the bookselling (and rep) community. Roger loved the idea; he set up a display in front and gave a little speech to the the late morning gathering. 

(Photo Credit: Kurtis Lowe / Roger Page introducing Gabrielle Zevin /The Storied Life of A. J. Fikry (Algonquin Books of Chapel Hill) / April 2014 Book of the Month Pick for Island Books / April 7th, 2014)

I’ve observed many bookstore succession stories. Laurie Raisys taking over, respecting traditions, and creating new ones, while bringing her own experience and energy to the store has clearly been a great success. Lillian Welch is my buyer now, and she eerily brings some of that challenging scrutiny that reminds me of Roger, but also a new and vibrant commitment to the best books for all readers in challenging times. Thank you to the many booksellers at Island Books who carry on your great tradition and congratulations to Island Books for 50 years as a shining literary light on Mercer Island!

Thank you to Dan, Christine, David and Kurtis, for giving us a glimpse into how those books get on the shelves at Island Books!

To our Island Books community: In the next 50 Years of Island Books installment, I’ll be talking to Cindy Corujo, who has been a bookseller for 36 years and has the longest tenure of any Island Books employee.

—Miriam

[jackgoodfellow]

Did you know Samo has a big brother?? It's true! He picks them up after class sometimes. Of course, Hikari insists that everything he says sounds "incredibly threatening," but he really is just a wonderful big bro!!

[fandom]

Ships

Love is in the air (in hell).

Billford Bill Cipher & Stanford Pines, Gravity Falls

Farcille Falin Touden & Marcille Donato, Dungeon Meshi

Poolverine Wade Wilson & Logan Howlett, the Marvel universe

Ineffable Husbands -3 Aziraphale & Crowley, Good Omens

Destiel -2 Dean Winchester & Castiel, Supernatural

Radioapple Lucifer Morningstar & Alastor, Hazbin Hotel

Buddie +3 Evan Buckley & Edmundo Diaz, 9-1-1

Phan Daniel Howell & Phil Lester, YouTubers

Polin Penelope Featherington & Colin Bridgerton, Bridgerton

Satosugu +16 Gojo Satoru & Geto Suguru, Jujutsu Kaisen

Percabeth +76 Percy Jackson & Annabeth Chase, the Percy Jackson universe

Bucktommy Evan Buckley & Tommy Kinard, 9-1-1

Hannigram -4 Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham, Hannibal

Labru Laios Touden & Kabru, Dungeon Meshi

Zosan +18 Roronoa Zoro & Vinsmoke Sanji, One Piece

Narilamb Narinder & the Lamb, Cult of the Lamb

Huskerdust Husk & Angel Dust, Hazbin Hotel

Steddie -16 Steve Harrington & Eddie Munson, Stranger Things

Sonadow +27 Sonic & Shadow, Sonic the Hedgehog

Ghostsoap -6 Simon “Ghost” Riley & John “Soap” MacTavish, the Call of Duty franchise

Jegulus -3 James Potter & Regulus Black, the Harry Potter universe

Fiddauthor Fiddleford McGucket & Stanford Pines, Gravity Falls

Byler -19 Will Byers & Mike Wheeler, Stranger Things

Wolfstar -8 Remus Lupin & Sirius Black, the Harry Potter universe

Soukoku -3 Nakahara Chuuya & Dazai Osamu, Bungou Stray Dogs

Bakudeku -6 Bakugou Katsuki & Midoriya Izuku, Boku no Hero Academia

Loustat +5 Louis de Pointe du Lac & Lestat de Lioncourt, Interview with the Vampire

Hualian +30 Hua Cheng & Xie Lian, Tian Guan Ci Fu

Chaggie Charlie Morningstar & Vaggie, Hazbin Hotel

Lestappen +37 Charles Leclerc & Max Verstappen, Formula 1 drivers

Hilson James Wilson & Gregory House, House

Narumitsu +13 Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth, Ace Attorney

Spirk +15 Spock & James T. Kirk, Star Trek

Stolitz Stolas & Blitzo, Helluva Boss

Lokius +43 Loki Laufeyson & Mobius M. Mobius, Loki

Merthur -19 Merlin & Arthur Pendragon, Merlin

Payneland Edwin Payne & Charles Rowland, Dead Boy Detectives

Chilshi Chilchuck Tims & Senshi, Dungeon Meshi

Rhaenicent +61 Rhaenyra Targaryen & Alicent Hightower, House of the Dragon

Astarion x Tav +48 Astarion & Tav, Baldur's Gate 3

Armandaniel Armand & Daniel Molloy, Interview with the Vampire

Griddlehark -2 Gideon Nav & Harrowhark Nonagesimus, The Locked Tomb series

Superbat +12 Superman & Batman, the DC universe

Zolu Roronoa Zoro & Monkey D. Luffy, One Piece

Zelink -33 Zelda & Link, The Legend of Zelda

Jonmartin +5 Jonathan Sims & Martin Blackwood, The Magnus Archives

Vashwood -36 Vash the Stampede & Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Trigun

Zukka +20 Zuko & Sokka, Avatar: The Last Airbender

Staticradio Alastor & Vox, Hazbin Hotel

Ratiorine Dr. Ratio & Aventurine, Honkai: Star Rail

Blackbonnet -36 Edward "Blackbeard" Teach & Stede Bonnet, Our Flag Means Death

Hanamusa -9 Jessie & Delia Ketchum, the Pokémon franchise

Wangxian -28 Lan Wangji & Wei Wuxian, Mo Dao Zu Shi

Pearlina Pearl Houzuki & Marina Ida, Splatoon

Firstprince -32 Alex Claremont-Diaz & Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Red, White & Royal Blue

Shuake Kurusu Akira & Goro Akechi, Persona 5

Drarry +6 Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter, the Harry Potter universe

Landoscar Lando Norris & Oscar Piastri, Formula 1 drivers

Bingqiu Luo Binghe & Shen Qingqiu, The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System

Shadowpeach +2 Sun Wukong & the Six-Eared Macaque, Lego Monkie Kid

Zutara Zuko & Katara, Avatar: The Last Airbender

Itafushi Itadori Yuji & Fushiguro Megumi, Jujustu Kaisen

Loumand Louis de Pointe du Lac & Armand, Interview with the Vampire

Timkon +25 Tim Drake & Conner Kent, Young Justice

Klance +18 Keith & Lance, Voltron: Legendary Defender

Nuzi N & Uzi Doorman, Murder Drones

Durgetash The Dark Urge & Enver Gortash, Baldur's Gate 3

Cherik Charles Xavier & Erik Lehnsherr, the Marvel universe

Kathony Kate Sharma & Anthony Bridgerton, Bridgerton

Staticmoth Vox & Valentino, Hazbin Hotel

Shin Soukoku Akutagawa Ryunnosuke & Nakajima Atsushi, Bungou Stray Dogs

Huntlow -65 Hunter & Willow Park, The Owl House

Haikaveh Kaveh & Alhaitham, Genshin Impact

Chainshipping Lawrence Gordon & Adam Stanheight, Saw

ButtonBlossom Ragatha & Pomni, The Amazing Digital Circus

Agathario Agatha Harkness & Rio Vidal, the Marvel universe

Broppy Branch & Poppy, the Trolls franchise

Lumity -65 Luz Noceda & Amity Blight, The Owl House

Radiorose Alastor & Rosie, Hazbin Hotel

Imodna -53 Imogen Temult & Laudna, Critical Role

Rosekiller Barty Crouch Jr. & Evan Rosier, the Harry Potter universe

Everlark Katniss Everdeen & Peeta Mellark, The Hunger Games

Wenclair -78 Wednesday Addams & Enid Sinclair, Wednesday

Kataang Katara & Aang, Avatar: The Last Airbender

Caitvi -5 Caitlyn Kiramman & Vi, Arcane

Adrienette -50 Adrien Agreste & Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir

Davekat +3 Dave Strider & Karkat Vantas, Homestuck

Adamsapple Adam & Lucifer Morningstar, Hazbin Hotel

Twiyor -58 Loid Forger & Yor Forger, SPY x FAMILY

Shuggy Shanks & Buggy, One Piece

Scollace Scott Pilgrim & Wallace Wells, the Scott Pilgrim franchise

Madohomu Kaname Madoka & Homura Akemi, Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Solangelo -23 Will Solace & Nico di Angelo, the Percy Jackson universe

Kimharry Kim Kitsuragi & Harry Du Bois, Disco Elysium

Klapollo -2 Apollo Justice & Klavier Gavin, Ace Attorney

Maxley Max Goof & Bradley Uppercrust III, An Extremely Goofy Movie

Megop Megatron & Optimus Prime, Transformers

Wilmon -34 Prince Wilhelm & Simon Eriksson, Young Royals

Johnshi Johnny Cage & Kenshi Takahashi, Mortal Kombat

Korrasami -5 Korra & Asami Sato, The Legend of Korra

The number in italics indicates how many spots a ship moved up or down from the previous year. Bolded ships weren’t on the list last year.

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