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Ranking the Veilguard companions Hookup Potential based on the kind of bed situation they have going on in the Lighthouse
(im in early act 2 so have no idea what further romance scenes are actually like, this is just jokin time without any romance spoilers. just pics of how their respective rooms in the lighthouse look and some basic characterization we know about them)
Taash: 8/10
In another game or the real world I would only rate this a 5 because they have no pillows or addition blankets. however they do have a real bedframe AND it's big enough for 2 which means the they are doing better than 90% of the rest of the Veilguard so this score gets boosted. And while there's not many blankets, there are plenty of braziers around the room to keep you warm, and Taash is probably their own miniature furnace to cuddle up to. Crucially, they also have a whole wheel of cheese next to the bed, which means you don't even have to leave the covers to get a snack after.
Lucanis: 1/10
Oh no. I'm not even going to comment on the pantry angle because everyone else asks him about that to begin with, so this is just about the bed. Unfortunately the bed is a cot made of uneven wooden planks with some blankets on top of it, and is only wide enough for 1. This is because Lucanis hates sleeping and doesn't want to do it, so the less tempting his bed is, the better for him. Unfortunately this means sleepover potential is dreadful and you will have to find alternate solutions. He does at least have another blanket to go over him and one that's presumably being used as a pillow, so, he gets a 1 instead of a 0, but I am still planning on gifting him coupons for a back massage for Satinalia.
Bellara: 4/10
This setup is perfectly fine for sleeping. It's the lighthouse standard little bed couch thing, has a mattress/cushion, is elevated off the floor, has a pillow, and she's got her blankets folded below. Perfectly serviceable for getting a good night's rest which we know Bellara is not because she forgot to sleep again. However, it's very much a one person sized setup. You might be able to cuddle for a while but if one of you unconsciously tries to roll over you are going right to the floor. Ouch.
Lace Harding: 5/10
You might be wondring "why is sleeping on the floor rated higher than bellara's" and the answer is because this means you are not rolling off the bed onto the floor. it's not going to be comfy but we are not ranking comfort here we're ranking sleepover potential. Harding has managed to make this space look homey and the canopy gives the illusion of being in a tent or canopy bed to help with that illusion. There are rugs down on the floor plus the blankets and pillows--we know Harding is used to sleeping on the ground due to her career as a scout, and I'm sure she can scrounge up more blankets to make the cushioning big enough for the both of you. Your back WILL hurt in the morning but you'll get to have a fun night first.
Neve: 3/10
Girl I know you can do better than this. Which means you're not trying to on purpose, so, live your life I guess. I will say this cot IS bounds nicer than Lucanis's--you can see its a stretched canvas or hide on a frame rather than wooden planks, so it will have a little more give. However they are not THAT much comfier which I know having slept on this modern equivalent many times. Neve also apparently has 0 pillows or blankets so you're out of luck there, as well as the problem of it only being wide enough for 1 again. This woman has too many other things going on to think about romance so your Rook is going to be the one improvising on that matter I think.
Davrin: 10/10
Now here is a man who has his life together. Double or queen size mattress, rustic bed frame he probably lovingly carved and assembled himself by hand, and not only are there sheets AND blankets AND pillows, they are are full on matching set and this knight in shining armor dutifully makes the bed every morning. There's also enough pillows for two! While the remains of a giant corpse is hanging above you all night, the spacing of the ribs still gives you lots of room above to manouver, so just don't worry about that. As a bonus you'll probably even have a baby griffon come to cuddle in the night which is such a cute thought we're going to ignore how much worse getting stepped on by a griffon foot would be than even the biggest fattest housecat trying to stand on your stomach at 4:30am. My one criticism of the setup here is that due to the bed's positioning if the person on the inside needs to get up in the night they'll have to awkwardly crawl over the person on the outside, however everyone else's bed situation is so dismal I'm not even going to subtract a point for that. Great work Davrin.
Emmrich: ???/10
Where... does this man sleep. Peepaw I KNOW you can't be sitting in that armchair all night you need your beauty rest!!! There are 0 beds or cots or floor blankets in this man's room. HOW am I supposed to break his pelvis if he has nowhere for us to lie down??? We can't risk that old man's spine on the cobblestone.
Wait... unless. No, surly not. I mean--jk. Unless...? 😳😳😳
is daddy necromancer gonna fuck me on the sacrifice slab... 😳😳😳🥵🥵🥵
Bonus:
Solas 11/10
does not matter where he actually slept bc once my inquisitor Gets Him again they WILL be fucking on top of the piano in front of the mural in his Yearning Room
#i know rook has their own couch thing however this post was funnier without it. also they have 0 pillows/blankets so a 5/10 also.#ramblings#dragon age: veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard#dav shitposts#lucanis dellamorte#taash#lucanis#lace harding#harding#bellara#bellara lutare#neve#neve gallus#davrin#emmrich#emmrich volkarin#solas#solavellan#rook#full disclosure after i thought of this and took all these pics i Did get a cutscene where emmrich has a corpse on the table so. not a bed#but for a few days of running around i WAS like... i mean theres nowhere else... what if...#i still think itd be hot#jade plays dav#juniper aldwir#juniper rook#datv#veilguard#also plrease note i made this before i got taash’s Gender Quest… i edited the pronouns after#but the old reblogs that got popular still show ‘she’ sorry
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Breaking news!! Local mall teens loiter and buy NOTHING.
Bonus bg pic bc Steph’s hair covered it all lol (I didn’t put a whole lotta effort in the bg lines but the lighting was fun and I wanted to show it off <3)
#they scrounged for tokens under the machines and played like two games b4 dipping to go get slurpies#superwholock cameo 🤭#see if you can find all 10 alternate media references lol#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#batgirl#batgirls#black bat dc#spoiler dc#y2k aesthetic#hot topic#digital art#my art#fan art#artists on tumblr#dc#dc comics#digital drawing#batman#only in gotham#stephcass
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Hoyo games badly summarised
Honkai impact 3rd: a very stressed lesbian's unrequited love for the universe she might destroy
Genshin impact: a series of side quests so elaborate they became the main quest
Honkai star rail: travelling the stars, running from criminal exes, killing God. the family business
Zenless zone zero: The job market is tough in the apocalypse
#i doint play zzz and everything i know after the first 10 chapters of hi3 is second hand so take it with a grain of salt#and tot: man my clients are HOT#hoyoverse#genshin impact#honkai#honkai star rail#honkai impact 3rd#hi3#hi3rd#hsr#genshin#zzz#zzzero#zenless zone zero#shitpost
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Tumblr keeps popping up to sell me ad free dashboard. But what it doesn't understand is that me and the ads have a sort of symbiosis at this point.
The guys from the fake gameplay trailers for a predatory mobile app are my blorbos
#the kings return to do WHAT?#oh my god they put him in a situation#last year he was solving fake puzzles and this year he is shooting hordes of zombies while trying to chokse#which gate that looks like all the other gates in all the other shooting hordes of zombies games#ooh whats my little phoenix wright up to?#begging to be drooled on by a giant cyclops with gianter boobs?#hell yeah you go little pheonix knight#endure or divorce! what will she pick! blond bimbo and boo monstersinc freeze to death in the cold water#my heart will go on#after their nasty dad ate all the food! the tragedy#oh heres another trailer with that same nasty dad! hes snorkling? where is my daccoon eyed woman WHAT THE FUC#SOMEONE POURED (POOP?) INTO HIS SNORKLE THATS SO TERRIBLE#theyre running away wherre is the bimbo oh its all frozen#everythign froze so fast and now nasty dad is in a winter coat and also changed his entire physique#now hes gathering logs now hes buikding a settlement#damn guess we know what happened after the divorce!#and thats how you know the winter log game is by the same company as (one of many) repair the house game#thry got nasty dad model#and he is GOING places#if yiu ever hear 'i finally found a game that is exactly what they show in the ads!' no you didnt#i would love to play the fat guy fighting a horse for the last drop of water#hes like me fr#but hes too busy building underground rooms with the hot chick who may or may not die#SPEAKING OF HOT CHICKS i love that game where you romance a level 10 babe#not a crook or informant thats her whole job description#level 10 babe#she cqn be romanced by picking her off the ground or by showing her money (which you dont have)#but the other guy does!#i wonder what halpens to her#oh good shes upgraded to mafia wife! good for her and she has some buns in the oven too she must be so happOH NO
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This has probably been already said but what about Raven!Neil in an AU where he escapes with Jean. They are on the run for a little while and amidst the chaos of two Ravens missing, Kevin's hand is broken.
Nathaniel gets word that Kevin is taking sanctuary with the Foxes' very own Coach Wymack. Nathaniel, being the shit he is, concocts the plan to get Wymack to sign him and Jean to make it look like their disappearance was intentional.
Jean hates the plan. Kevin hates that he can't get away from Nathaniel. Nathaniel doesn't give a shit at long as he is away from Riko and is on a court.
#shut up capt#callum rumbles#aftg#i am aware of the amount of holes this concept has in it but *waves hands* look at them#nathaniel having little empathy for kevin besides the fact that his hand prevents him from playing#and being more focused on Jean#andrew coming in later and still taking in Kevin#eventually andrew figures out that his deal with kevin means little when nathaniel has all the resources to keep riko away from them#andrew and nathaniel fighting for a hot moment before realizing theres something more to their bickering#jean becoming very close to renee and by extension the upperclassmen and eventually andrew#nathaniel and jean learning that they can survive being apart and deviating from the buddy system#nathaniel embracing his new number 10 instead of his 3#but jean feeling ill when he realizes he has to be 11 instead of 4 now#thats enough rambling#aftg au#the perfect court#neil josten#kevin day#jean moreau#coach wymack#riko moriyama
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Nicola Coughlan is probably one of the few white women I'll go up for. Love her down.
#blue blabber 🗣️#she's so freaking fine#like body ody ody#I wish the man that played Collin was finer tho#how unfortunate#my mom is watching the new part on the tv#I haven't watched since season one#I fear if I start back watching I'll start writing a Miguel Bridgerton AU#KATE AND ANTHONY....BUT MIGUEL AND READER#PENELOPE AND COLLIN WITH BETTER WRITING.....#AUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH#QUEEN CHARLOTTE.....#like if I watch the Kate and Anthony mmbop scenes that I know are there....it's keys for me#Miguel as a hot candidate for the reader diamond of the season#STOP MY BRAIN FROM WANDERING#I DON'T NEED ANOTHER WIP#I HAVE LIKE....AT LEAST 10#just counted#12.5#it's keys#adhd is my gift and my curse
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Wake up! it's wilmon's season! 🍂
#all to well (taylor's version)(10 minutes version) starts playing*#scarfs! brown leaves! red noses! hot chocolate nights at hillerska!#young royals#wilmon#young royals season 2#edvin ryding#omar rudberg#prince wilhelm#simon eriksson#simon x wilhelm#wilhelm x simon
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I feel like you love piss a lil bit too much 📸🤨
PISS KINK ALLEGATIONS????????
#ask#anon#jkjk this is not to kinkshame or anything#piss is p cool#id say im not actively into it but if it comes down to it id be willing to play into it#like i see the appeal but its not like im specifically going for it#but it can defo be pretty hot#so. 8/10 👍#sillydoods
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Narrowing my petty, bitch eyes at the fandom giving more notes to human nosed gith than normal looking gith.
#why tho like just play an elf you boring ass people#play your barbie dolls and leave the hot aliens to the people that appreciate them#it's exhausting when the gith tag is so much human nose#and there's fucking amazing artists drawing actual gith and they get like ten notes#i don't mean me btw i mean actual good artists#48 notes for a gith that looks like a love island contestant#10 to an actual gith looking gith
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Very VERY self indulgent yuri kafyuan cause M DESPERATE FOR SOME CONTENT
#my art#aratribow#LESBIAN KAFYUAN ARE SOOOO HOT RED FLAG YANDER3 CODED#i love that#i love women that can just kill me😔#they 10/10 play psychological games for foreplay#honkai star rail#hsr kafka#hsr jingyuan#kafyuan#jing yuan#fem!jing yuan
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i know what you are
#he's insufferable i hate him so much#great ace attorney#update on Thoughts: second game feels different#it plays more streamlined. there's no more wasting time repeating the same points fifty times#but i don't know. i think they set themselves up for too many inconsistencies by leaving so much unresolved in the first one#the vibe is different. the first one was more Layton-esque. this one is more Ace Attorney proper#some of the unanswered questions are reiterated differently as well and i'm like “well that's not how you phrased it in the first game..."#this is all most evident in the flashback case which is like inconsistency central. one of my least favourites of the entire franchise#but the first case is easily top 10 if not top 5 cases from the franchise for me. by no means do i hate this game#Raiten Menimemo is hot and i can say it because i don't give a fuck anymore#i'm going to sound like such a brat (and not like 360 BRAT summer. like an actual brat) but... i kinda miss the first game#... even though it took me literally three years to finish and threw multiple tirades about hating it#i think it's because i've recently finished an entire year of playing the Layton games and in my head it's reminiscent of those...#anyway..... if i find out Kazuma WASN'T topping Van Zieks i'll be very angry
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dead Boy Detectives (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne/Charles Rowland Characters: Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne, Charles Rowland (DCU) Additional Tags: Angst, Only At The Begining, video games - Freeform, They acquire a nintendo switch, Then cannot get it to work, then there is smut, Orgasm Control, Anal Sex, Biting Summary:
After fighting through the horrors of Port Townsend, Charles feels the urge to modernise. Edwin and Charles angst about the unceasing march of time, while attempting to figure out how to operate a Nintendo Switch. Feelings emerge, smut ensues.
#rexrevri fic rec#this fic is the most well written and well characterized that I have read in a very long time#it's sad#it's angsty#and its so hot#the way these characters are written is so well done#and I'm obsessed with a little edwardian ghost playing video games out of pure spite#10/10 will be thinking about this one forever#dead boy detectives#Charles Rowland#Edwin Payne#Payneland#dead boy detectives fanfiction#ao3 link#dbda#dbda fanfiction
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#dan and phil#weed#besties i am so high rn i am losing it#i took like one too many bong hits#started playing flight rising on the desktop computer bc it loads so much faster than my chromebook#opened youtube to have something on the second monitor#found dan and phil's fuckin lofi album???#lost my absolute shit about it#went to post about it from tumblr mobile but wanted to make this meme to do it justice so pulled up a meme editor on my desktop#(the meme editor had so many advanced text options since when have meme editors come this far??)#anyway made the meme realized my phone is at super low battery so decided to just log on to tumblr to post it directly from the desktop#even though i'm nearly exclusively a mobile user now and have been for years#so i have to log in to tumblr and now i'm experiencing making a post from the desktop site while still pretty blitzed#is it firefox that allows me to edit the tags after i've typed them or is that a desktop thing now#oh shit do i have any extensions on#depending on what imported from chrome when i changed my browser like six months ago this may be some sort of extension#whatever it is im okay with it this is great#i'm having such a good time right now genuinely#also watched chappell roan's hot to go music video for the first time during an interlude in the whole meme making process#there is currently a restoration video playing in the other tab that's been going for 10 minutes while i've been making this post#this is me living my best life honestly#i need at least one person to acknowledge the journey of tags on this post if only so i know I'm not alone in knowing my experience
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#so i just posted a “new” art on my twitter#not really new#i just havent posted it because of shadowban#its the gator art#i feel so good about that art bcs not only its my own character its also just reallll hot i love it so much#buti#i just lost 10 followers from posting it#its now sitting on 100 likes#literally everyone hates it#and now my confidence is just so low about it#this happens a lot for some reason#i like the art#people dont like it#and its sad bcs that one is a hit here and in bluesky and in FA#but for some reason on twitter its just#everybody just fucking hate it#if nobody interacts with it im like its fine that means shadowban or whatever#but losing followers?? over a drawing of a muscle fat gator??? that just fucking sucks#i fucking hate this place#i used to be good on playing with twitter but now im just so fucking bad at it#people say its because of algorithm but almost every artist thats good enough are able to post and always get a good reach#anyway i also just found out another EX-friend unfollowed me there as he reach 100k#he started learning to draw after me btw so....#this sucks
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Everyone posts about how Stardew Valley is a cozy LGBT+ inclusive game but NO ONE mentions the lack of a platonic option for the bachelors/bachelorettes. Which would be good for aspec people and also just more pleasant for many casual players I believe but that's not even the point. I just want to become best friends with everyone and not only does that require me dating everyone at once and feeling like a sleazebag because of it (ik the bad cutscene can be avoided but I know in my heart they'd be hurt if they knew) BUT it also means the women flirt with me!!!!! Constantly!!!!!!! It makes me sick to my stomach. Truly ruining the characters I liked
#this post is not that serious or meant to be an Analysis or a Discourse Post or a Hot Take or whatever#i just think the dating thing needs to be handled differently#i should be able to Not Date characters and still get 10 hearts with them#also ive never made it far enough in stardew valley to marry someone and this is the first time i could even date someone#and ive heard that the flirtatious comments dont stop once you're married which is. really awkward for me#i mean i could probably handle the guys flirting with me while im married but id hope being married would be an off switch for it#its just awkward to have ppl im not actually dating and only gave a bouquet to so i can be their friend be called my bf/gf when. they're Not#i seriously need to find some kind of mod to fix this once i finish getting all the girls up to ten hearts#i will deal with the stomach churning grossness of the flirting for a while so i can see everything#but then I'm DONE!!! I'm DONE!!!! I just want my friends back!!!!#maru and abigail and haley !!! my buds!!!#NOT emily shes scary and NOT leah because we just didn't click and DEFINITELY not penny because i fucking hate her#penny sucks. penny dni#but yeah the flirting feels gross because im gay and repulsed by women romantically/sexually#and even though i did open myself up to this by playing the game. because i dont want it it feels like its being forced on me#which makes it feel even WORSE than normal#and its like. not only do i feel like I'm stringing along these characters#but i feel like my friendship with my favourites is ruined :(
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Dragon Quest 4 is pretty good but I still stand firm in my belief that 7-9 are the best ones
#spitblaze says things#dragon quest#granted i havent played 10#and also 4 is uh. hm.#well. its got noticably more racism than the others#some of it is affectionate#some of it is minstrel enemies called 'hoodoo voodoo'#i get that its of a different era#they still maybe couldve. amended it a bit for the remake#by 2007 they absolutely shouldve known better#anyway. dq4 is fine lol#i havent played 5 in a hot minute so hopefully that will not have any racism jumpscares that i forgot about
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