#hope ur leap day was nice

[gawki]

Leap of faith

[miclipse]

IM SCREAMING ur new raf fic with him being a literal fish WAS SO DANG CUTE ugh towards the end where he finally starts to warm up to her i wish he could give her a hug but he is technically a fish so KDKDKD

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ a fish's embrace.

pairing: rafayel x fem! reader

synopsis: how do fishes give hugs? well, this is how rafayel does it.

word count: 1.8k

cw: afab! reader, rafayel is a fish (literally), reader is a princess, slight angst/comfort, fluff, slight mentions of death.

note: hear me out anon... you kept me up at night with this. read this first for context!! comments appreciated <3

“hi fifi, how’s your day?”

the familiar sight of you lowering yourself to sit on the chair and peering into his fishtank caught rafayel’s attention.

rafayel swam out of the coral he usually hid himself in, a trail of bubbles following behind him as his tail flapped left and right.

well, there was only so much rafayel could do everyday in this fishtank. some include performing his everyday underwater stretches and somersaults, as well as gobble up the pellets you would pour into his tank during meal times.

although rafayel does not mind being a domestic pet to a princess, he was a social fish— or what humans would call an extrovert. and isolating him in a fishtank with no other companions really had a toll on his mental health (yes, fishes have them too).

well, he had you. but conversations with you were one-sided. he tried communicating with you verbally, hoping you possessed some sort of special power that allowed you to speak to animals like those fairytales he would read about when he was still a small fry. but to no avail.

all you understood from him was glub glub glub and a couple of bubbles escaping through his mouth.

some fish could easily live in solitude, but rafayel was not one of them. he loved mingling and talking to other fellow fishes. he may not be fond of socializing all the time, but having a fellow fish to talk to occasionally would be nice.

it had been a while since he last had a proper two-way conversation with a fellow fish. those nights where he would be laughing and joking around with his friends was now replaced with being trapped in an enclosure and listening to you complain about royal affairs he doubted he was even supposed to be aware about.

rafayel learnt from you that the problems humans face was a million times more than the problems fishes like him face. his only concern back when he was still in the ocean was whether he would be a shark’s snack.

“do you ever feel lonely in here?” your sad sigh directed rafayel’s attention back to you. your hair was still wet from your recent shower, making it stick to your neck and leave a damp patch on the nightgown you currently had on. you rested your chin on the palm of your hand, staring into rafayel’s aquatic terrarium with a guilty expression.

rafayel responded with a glub and a couple bubbles coming out of his mouth.

“i was thinking of returning you back to your actual home,”

…wait, what did you just say?

suddenly, rafayel was filled with a sense of dread, his mind running a hundred miles per minute. you were planning to abandon him just like that? it had only been approximately two months (almost coming to three).

he was finally able to convince himself that you were far from those spoiled brats he had heard stories about back when he was a baby fish living in the ocean. was that kind nature of yours nothing but a facade? he thought the two of you were close enough to be honest with each other.

how could you be so cruel to make him develop such a strong sense of attachment and reliability towards you, only for you to want to throw him back into the ocean where you had initially found him?

just when rafayel was contemplating about dramatically leaping out from the top of the tank and perishing right then and there on your study table filled with confidential documents, you spoke again.

“but i don't want to be lonely again.” you whispered, now slumping over your desk with your arm as a cushion for your head. your index finger was absentmindedly tracing shapes and letters against the surface of rafayel's tank.

rafayel stayed still, blinking at you behind the glass and impatiently urging you to continue with what you were implying.

sometimes, he hated it whenever you talked in a way that left so much suspense in the air.

seriously, couldn't you just treat him like an inanimate object and just blurt out whatever that was on your mind? you were acting as if you were waiting for his response, and it made him feel annoyed to a certain extent.

it wasn't like you could understand him even if he were to respond to you anyways. all you could hear was glub glub glub.

“you're the only one that i can confide in. if you're gone, i don't know what to do anymore.”

you sounded… pitiful.

everyone would have thought being a princess was full of a life of privileges, fun and riches. but no one ever saw the harsh reality beneath the beautiful facade of your life.

rafayel wasn't sure if this was the life of every princess to exist, but if it really was the case, then every princess definitely led a miserable life.

the only difference between you and other princesses was that not all of them necessarily had a pet fish that they could turn to during times like this.

“you probably think i'm selfish, huh?” you mumbled to rafayel with a small smile, a faint chuckle escaping your lips. “holding you hostage in my tank just so i have someone to talk to.”

you've perfectly read rafayel's mind, the only flaw was that your mind reading seemed to have a two month delay.

two months ago, if you were to say the same exact words as you did just a few seconds ago, rafayel would have agreed with you in a heartbeat.

but things were different now. much, much different.

rafayel was a social fish. he missed being able to talk and have people (or fishes) actually understand what he was saying. he missed spending his nights keeping his fellow fish companions awake as they all told each other stories of what they've encountered while swimming around in the oceans during the day.

but if given the opportunity to choose between a life of solitude in your bedroom and swimming around aimlessly in the oceans, he would choose this life.

rafayel would choose you over and over again in a hundred lifetimes.

occasionally during the day when you were away for your royal duties, rafayel would think about this alot (not that he had anything else to do in here).

he had come to realise that when he were to eventually die one day, he'd much rather die here in this fishtank as compared to dying in the vast abyss of the ocean, where he wouldn't even know what was to happen to his carcass after his heart stopped beating. the most realistic scenario was that he would be eaten up by a shark or another hungry fish in the waters, but even just the thought of that sent shivers down the fish’s spine.

sure, rafayel had fish friends out there in the ocean, but who was to say that they hadn't already been devoured by other sea creatures?

a life out in the wild was always accompanied by danger, and rafayel was at an even greater disadvantage with his size as compared to the other animals living alongside him in the waters.

at least if he died here, he knew he would be remembered by you. he hated to think that he could no longer comfort and be there for you the day you would cry and weep over his passing, but he knew that he would forever live on in your heart at the very least.

the two of you were just a pair of lonely souls trying to heal each other despite your difficulties communicating to each other. rafayel was here for you to vent your frustrations of life as a princess, and you would be here to keep rafayel safe and remembered.

with you, rafayel had an identity. he was no longer a lost and stray fish swimming around in the ocean, worrying constantly of when he would be gobbled up.

he was your biggest treasure, your beloved fifi.

with him, you could put down the invisible crown along with the shackles of your status. you weren’t a princess, you weren’t the girl getting lectured and scolded by your parents for your misconduct. you were just an ordinary girl who absolutely adored her pet fish and cuddled with her plushies.

perhaps the two of you did have some similarities.

despite the many differences the two of you had, it was the small similarities you two shared that made your bond with each other so strong even with the lack of verbal communication.

that's right. the bond between you and rafayel was so strong that you both didn't even need verbal communication to come to a mutual understanding.

“i love you, fifi.”

hearing your declaration of love made rafayel feel all fuzzy inside today. perhaps it was because of how vulnerable the conversation (or monologue) was tonight, but he felt extra affectionate towards you today.

you slowly dipped the pad of your index finger into the tank, putting into careful consideration not to frighten rafayel away with any sudden movements.

rafayel tilted his head up to look at your index finger slowly sinking into the tank. you never moved your index finger towards him, you always left your finger in the middle of the tank to wait for him to approach you if he felt like it.

rafayel greatly respected that about you.

slowly swimming up towards your finger, he could picture the smile slowly growing on your face without even needing to turn to look at you.

although rafayel may be a fish, he would definitely put in an effort to show you that he loves you too.

rafayel used his bottom fins to wrap around your finger as a way to give you a hug.

a soft gasp could be heard, and you tried to contain your excitement but rafayel could feel how your finger was trembling with happiness as you tried not to make any sudden movements that'll frighten him away from you.

the both of you remained in this state for a few moments, enjoying the silence. rafayel was initially unsure of how you would react to him attempting to hug you, but his worries about that dissipated the moment he saw the expression on your face.

rafayel had no way to describe the way you were staring at him, but he could read what was currently in your mind.

thank you for loving me too, fifi.

and a part of him felt satisfied that his mind reading skills was much better than yours, because at least he could beat you at something.

as rafayel’s fins continued hugging your finger, he smiled faintly to himself. so this was how it felt to hug a human, huh?

tonight, he was not rafayel. he was not the fish that lived in the wild, loving freedom and dangerous adventures.

tonight, he was fifi. the princess’s beloved pet fish that she loved immeasurably.

all rights reserved © miclipse 2024. do not repost, plagiarize, copy, modify or translate my works on any platforms.

[babybatss-blog]

OH MY GOODNESS I LOVED UR SAM FICS, PLEASE WRITE ONE ABOUT LIKE HIM X READER IN THE FALL SHARING FLANNELS AND SWEATSHIRTS

BEGIN AGAIN

stardew!sam x reader, 1400 words

a/n: ahhhh omg you’re so sweet! Although it isn’t that important to the story, I based this fic on “begin again” by Taylor Swift. Hope you enjoy!

cw: predeveloped relationship between Sam and reader, confession of love. Mention of adult sexy time 😉 but nothing explicit. Slight angst into sickly sweet fluff. Reader is insecure, with mentions of past relationship and friendship struggles.

You tried to deny it, you really did. But walking hand in hand through town on a cold fall day the realisation hits you that you are inexplicably, irreversably in love with Sam. You’ve been together for a few months now, but honestly it was only really a casual relationship built on messy hookups and an innate need for physical affection. And even if Sam thought it was anything different you never intended to get very far with it after the last few years of your life. You escaped to Stardew valley to forget men, with their stupid player attitudes and outlook on relationships. Truthfully, you were perfectly happy with just becoming some single weirdo for the rest of your life. But this golden retreiver of a man just makes you so happy, blushing like a school girl and heart racing faster than ever before.

The mere thought of how down bad you are for him causes a shiver down your spine, and not just some small one but one that makes you physically shake. “Cold?” He asks, looking down to you with his bushy eyebrows furrowed. Without another word he takes his flannel off and wraps it around your shoulders, patting them with his big hands and grinning like a buffoon before holding your hand once more.

Honestly you didn’t even need it, but the way he thinks he’s some sort of knight in shining armor always stops you from protesting. You arrive at the town’s playground, a shabby swingset attached to a slide that’s cracked and rusted at the joints. It sure isn’t some masterpiece, but it does the job of entertaining the town’s children on the weekends. And Sam apparently, who lets go of your hand and leaps onto the swing. The scoots back in order to get enough momentum as possible and flies into the air, his blonde mop of hair flying off with him.

“Woo!! Join me?” You just chuckle, but join him nontheless, swinging much softer than he is but with the same pleased expression. The two of you swing in silence for a bit, with him enjoying the moment and you dreading it. How could you have let yourself go back to your old ways? It may seem great now, but in your head you already can see him confessing to cheating or breaking up with you because he’s bored. “So, you know the saying when pigs fly?” he asks. “Do you think we could actually make them fly? Like genetically modify wings on them and teach them like baby birds?” To the normal individual this seems like an idiotic question, but you’re used to his antics so you don’t even blink and respond casually with a “I hope not. Then I’d have to deal with trying to fish mine out of the sky every night when they need to go to the barn.” To this Sam laughs, throwing his head back as if you just said the funniest thing ever.

You don’t really think your very funny, and you never did. In school you were always the quiet kid, not because you are quiet but because you didn’t have many friends. Therefore, you just built yourself up to other things. You may not be funny, but your reasonably pretty. And smart, you did okay in school.

But Sam just makes you feel like the funniest person to ever exist, laughing at your words even when you don’t attempt to be funny. It makes you feel… nice.

Stuck in your thoughts though you unfortunately fail to conceal yourself once more, Sam realising the way you just completely ignore his following statements with a glossy look behind your eyes. “Babe, you alright?” He enquires, ceasing his swinging immediately to return to your level. You look up at him and smile softly, sighing. He had to realise sooner or later, and you couldn’t hide it from him anyways.

“Sam?” You ask, turning in the swing so the chains intertwine and you face him. He mirrors your movements, scooting so your knees are now touching. The warmth makes you uncomfortable in this moment, but you would never pull away from him. “If I say something weird… would you judge me?” Once again his eyebrows crease at your words, fearlessly shaking his head. “Of course not! Why?” That pit in your stomach grows until you feel sick, the words failing you as you look down at his jeans, which is all you can manage at this moment. “Your not breaking up with me are you?” The way his voice cracks almost brings a tear to your eye, internally cursing yourself for paining him so much. How could you do this to such a sweet, innocent man?

“No no no I just…”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No Sam but I need to-“

“If you have an issue just say it I can handle it”

“I know you can its just hard cause-“

“Is this because I ate your pasta  the other day? Cause I thought you wouldn’t mind and I’m happy to-“

“Sam I’m in love with you.” The words rush out of your mouth like daggers, despite the sweetness they’re usually associated with. Every fibre of your being is fighting with one another, some parts happy the secret is out and others despising the pit you’ve fallen into. Yet you continue. “I think I’ve felt this way for a little bit, but I tried to hide it. I hate it, but I can’t anymore. You just make me so happy Sam, and I don’t know whats wrong with me. You drive me mad. I wake up thinking about you, and I fall asleep with the same thoughts. I imagine you moving in with me, marrying me and raising my kids. I feel insane Sam, but I can’t help it anymore. You don’t have to feel the same way, and don’t feel obligated to say anything. But I love you. I really do.”

A silence lingers in the cold air, flowing around like the brown and yellow leaves that fall onto the floor limply. You now get the courage to study his face, and every freckle and imprefection seems like it always has. If this is how the two of you are going to end, you don’t mind. You’ll still have every detail of his body engrained in your mind, along with how his face looks in this very moment. It looks as if he’s brain is about to explode, simultaneously going through every option and pathway that lead to this moment.

His deep blue eyes look up and connect with yours, piercing into your soul as if he’s reading you like a book. Finally he breaks the silence, a sympathetic smile adorning his cheeks. “I love you too.”

It takes you a moment to process his words, and just as it fully sinks in he envelops you in a hug. You begin to beam, heart beating like never before. Did he really just say that? The two of you simultaneously laugh, your hands palming his back and melting into his warmth. “Really?” “Duh! How could you think I didn’t? I literally spent my whole pay check the other day buying you flowers! And you know I hate flowers! And what about the time I wrote a six page card for your birthday, detailing everything about your face? I hate writing!” Despite the tears that threatened to leak out of your eyes previously you now cannot stop laughing, in disbelief of his words.

Sam tucks his head down into the crook of your neck, kissing it over and over again through smooshed words of “I love you” that vibrate on your skin, any prior discomfort flooding away under his touch. You smell like him, feel like him and breath like him, hands digging into his jumper out of pure extacy. Sam lifts you up by the thighs to put you on his lap, arms safely keeping you still ontop of him, and still kissing your neck and collarbone.

“I love you Sam.” “I love you too.” Despite the cold, grey of the sky and the muddy puddles below you everything feels perfect, in a bountiful fall you could never forget.

[saintjosie]

Hey just spent four hours scrolling your blog (adhd)

1) you’re cool

2) if you don’t mind could you talk a bit more about breaking free from religion sometime? If you don’t mind that is. Have a nice day regardless :)

1) ty! glad you think so!

2) and a ure!

first off, i think it’s important to say that there’s nothing wrong with being religious!

BUT. i also i that not enough people take time to understand the impact of their religion as a system of control, as well as a system of belief. and i think that’s one of the biggest mistakes i see when it comes to the first steps of unpacking religion. a lot of people take their first steps into deconstructing religion by observing the differences in what people say they believe vs how that belief actually plays out. and in the midst of that process, i see a lot of people desperately try to rebuild and repair their belief in an old system rather than allow that system to fall apart and understand the world anew.

and tbh that makes perfect sense! there’s this moment of separated disillusionment, where we are craving the comfort of the structure we are deconstructing and it’s only natural to be tempted to latch on to a different structure to help everything make sense.

but to truly break free of religion, you can’t simply take your new understanding of the world and adjust your views on your religion. to move beyond that temptation, to understand that the structure of a religion is itself a system designed to control faith, is a step that a lot of people miss because they just aren’t ready to make that leap.

and believe it or not, i am a big believer in faith! i think faith is an incredibly human trait. to hope for something beyond yourself, whether it be to hope for change, to hope for happiness, or even to hope for the end of suffering. and when religion tells you how to have faith and who to have faith in, you slowly forget how to faith in yourself.

“only god will save you. you are incapable of anything without god. you don’t need anything other than god. you don’t need to better yourself because god forgives you. you don’t need to work on yourself because all you need is more love for god.”

the only way to break free of that cycle for good is to learn how to have faith in yourself again.

you don’t need god to save you, you don’t need god’s forgiveness, and you don’t need gods love.

because you are powerful all on your lonesome.

so own it and leave the rest to crumble.

[thatdeadaquarius]

I have recently come to the conclusion that if my Genshin Impact account was self aware, my Bennet would be slightly even more unlucky than a regular Bennet. This is due to my birthday and since its coming up I've been brainrotting for the past few days. Let me explain:

Bennet's birthday is February 29th, aka Leap Year. This means Benny only has a real birthday once every four years, which is bad enough. But according to canonical game lore, when he doesn't have his actual birthday, he celebrates it on the 28th.

My birthday is February 28th.

Now, I'd like to think that in your typical SAGAU the creator's birthday is a BIG DEAL. I'm talking festivals, parades, feasts, gifts exchanged between friends and family as well as gifts offered to the creator! The whole nine yards! An entire world partying from sunrise to moonset.

So with this in mind, Bennet's birthday would either be celebrated the day after the biggest holiday party in Teyvat (meaning everyone who attends would be all partied out) or during my birthday (meaning that everyone would be focused on ME instead of Bennet, which is just unfair! He can't even take pride in being born the same day as the creator b/c he was born the day after!!!!).

Anyway, if I was isekai'd to Genshin and worshipped as a god, I would simply give Bennet his own holiday. Poor kiddo deserves a win and if it takes me telling my acolytes quote, "Everyone will to celebrate Bennet's holiday. No exceptions, no excuses. And if his holiday party doesn't end up a success, I will destroy all of Teyvat and then myself. :3c" then so be it. That last statement is a joke, but watching everyone try their absolute hardest to give my adopted little brother the best birthday possible would be worth the fear of the vague threat of the world's destruction in the eyes of my worshipers me thinks.

If you add to this brainrot, please feel free to ignore that last part if everyone panicking over the possibility of apocalyptic destruction makes you uncomfortable. Likewise, don't rush this out by my birthday if you don't have time. I'm also in college and have multiple assignments due both before and after my birthday so I know this upcoming week will be hellish in terms of academics. So don't push yourself, okay?

So yeah. Thanks for reading! Hope you have a nice day!

JOKES ON YOU IM DOIN THIS FIRST BC ITS NEAR UR BIRTH WHEN I SAW THIS - HAHAHA (also timezones r wack so hope i timed it good enough for u lmao)

HOPE ALL UR ASSIGNMENTS VANISH / R SUPER EASY AND TAKE NO TIME AT ALL TO DO SO U HAVE MORE FREE TIME TO READ MY BIRTHDAY GIFT TO YOU ANON <3

Have a pretty miku hatsune gif <3

YEAH SO U ENTERED UR BDAY INTO GENSHIN U KNOW THAT RIGHT??

WELL SINCE THAT WAS THE BASICS OF THE GAME/AT THE START-

TEYVAT HAS KNOWN YOUR BIRTHDAY AS LONG AS LIFE HAS LIVED ON TEYVET LOL

◇

So if it's your birthday and you have been isekaied to Teyvat in time for it,

or been there for that long bc how does one un-isekai themselves?? anyway

and its like,, pandemonium.

bc idealistically u surprise these bitches around/close to ur birthday, so everyone's gettin in that festival mood and then BAM- itd be like if the spirits/demons showed up irl for Halloween randomly one year, like- ???!!!

so everyone's just

"well we usually have a lot of fun/praise the highest being anyway, hoping they'll hear us thru whatever barrier's between us (coughstupidcomputercough), but now... we've got to go harder than any century before guys, they're actually here, nobody panic, this isn't a drill- somebody fucking grab the champagne- "

◇

So for a second, imagine the sweetest anyone has ever been to you.

now imagine another person does something just as sweet for you, now add another, now add another, now add-

yeah i hope u got a hoddie so u can go to sweatertown when u get too embarassed/shy, bc the compliments??

"I really like your voice btw, this may sound strange but it was always so comforting pulling those all nighter for another akademiya project, and just hearing you joking around or humming, what felt like only for me or to keep me company ;) " - Lisa

"I hope you don't mind me doing this, as I wasn't trying to invade you privacy when I came upon this knowledge, but I thought it would make a useful gift. I know you were frustrated when you came here that there wasn't as much cosmetics so I used alchemy to aid your cause, this is some color changing nail polish-"

-Albedo has gotten u ur exact foundation shade, concealer, a skin clearing serum that works 100x better than any skincare routine u had going/or not lol, and if you dont really wear makeup or do skin care, he has a backup of all ur fav perfumes/colognes that u wish u had in ur old world (he heard u ranting abt wanting those scents/stuff u liked like cherries or sandalwood etc.)

◇

bc even if ur not the type to feel that way when ppl do things like that for u, i promise u will be by the end of your birthday week.

everyone in teyvat wants your first in person birthday to be perfect,

ESPECIALLY the allogenes, or the playable characters

doesn't even matter if your FTP and dont have a single character outside of the beginners,

(they all had access to things like your voice, your actions, your social media, yae miko may or may not have personally printed off enough copies of a book full of any selfies/pics with you in it to reach every corner of teyvat ahem, she means what- nothing at all my beautiful god-)

anyway that is to say, your birthday month is generally really bountiful, both in festivals and teyvat itself, regardless if its dead winter or scorching summer

◇

but for the sake of ANON'S BIRTHDAY-

You have now been forcibly converted into a Pisces - gasp - from this moment on,

ik tragic im an aquarius 😔,

Bc this is anon's Teyvat rn and we're just living in it

(genshincharactersaboutyoubelike-)

◇

You don't know which authority figure to thank first for helping organize your week so you can go to a different city's festival for you every day of your bday week, it must have been hell to make 💀

(rip ningguang alhaitham jean and ayaka/ayato yall will be missed 💧🙏)

U kind of worked ur way backwards actually from game release country's dates, like Sumeru, Inazuma, Liyue, Mondstadt

Bc when they asked if u had a preference u whole heartedly spoke up in front of a room full of arguably the most influential and powerful people on the continent, in the world really- well besides you-

"Mondstadt would be a great festival to have on my actual birthday! After all one of my best boys Bennett, also has his birthday that day too!" :)

...

.....somewhere in the Wolvendom wilds Bennett shivers with a bolt of anxiety,

Razor is confused and asks if he's ok, he gives a shaky thumbs up,

"yeah i just... got the scariest feeling.. like something bad's gonna happen on my birthday this week... haha probably nothing!... probably..."

◇

So everyone's been pretty chill and happy for Benny to be so favored/spoiled by you, esp since ur sharing ur bday (most ppl think ur a saint bc of this)

But for some pretentious assholes, who think traditions should be adhered to, they kinda dont even like the stuff ur changing-

"Oh well, if you don't just celebrate Benett's birthday with mine, and really anyone else who's bday is also mine, I'll just ruin your country ;) "

...

Some ppl get ur joking, like alhaitham would never believe u,

But these poor old fools, coughsagescough,

R just like-

"...an eldritch god is angry with us."

Needless to say u get ur way,

And poor Benny is just like, shaking in the corner, he can't tell if this is more unlucky or the luckiest he's been lol

(He's also one of the allogenes who did not rlly get ur joke lmao,,, also Itto💀)

◇

If your somehow not overhwhlemed by gifts and acts of service on ur birthday,

Benny is.

Benny is for you.

Lol, he's like gonna make himself sick bc he cant just say "No thanks" to all the ppl giving you food, but end up giving him some too by proxy

He cant even count how many candies and baked goods are weighing down his pockets

Oh did i mention you've just like, linked arms with the little guy and dragged him wherever Mond's citizens r dragging you for the birthday festivities :)

◇

While he was mostly just in shock all day, Benny does take the time to tear up and thank you for sharing your birthday*

(*both of your birthdays, u correct him all day)

Jean, Barabra, Diluc, Kaeya, Amber, Traveler, Razor Sucrose Fischl and Klee (and Varka + older adventurers/his dads)

are all super happy to finally see the poor kid get the biggest break ever for his birthday finally

Esp after they saw the last few... yknow... non-existant ones... bc he only has a bday every 4 years lol

◇

Nearly starts sobbing publicly when u give him a present for his bday too :')

And after you all do a big toast for an evening bday dinner, u hug him and he actually cries a little, and he squeezes u back super hard

"I always thought I was too unlucky to get a birthday like this, but I guess if even a god like you hasn't given up on me, I shouldn't give up on me either, thank you for the best birthday I've ever had Your Majesty!"

:')

♡

(Tho Klee did sneakily give u and him some of her best and brightest bombs as a bday gift, so he did get a little singed but he barely noticed lmao)

♡

I hope my ass writing/ideas was a decent bday gift anon! :0

I love Pisces sm, i hope ur bday was/will be incredible anon!! :) <33

Safe Travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[jay8ashes]

{~וAngels Lament•×~}

All lyrics based of the song Noel's Lament!!!

WARNING: Angst, swearing, language, abuse references, drinking etc.

Hope you enjoy!!!

More info at the end-!//

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

``A hooker with a heart of black charcoal...``

Angel Dust heaved heavily as he read Valentino's message.

``U FUCKING WHORE!!! DO U ACTUALLY THINK U CAN GET AWAY FROM THE STUDIO AND ME? UR WRONG U FUCKIN PUSSY! I OWN U AND DONT U FORGET IT!``

He shivered. He had been staying away from the studio for a while now, spending most his time at the hotel. Charlie and everyone else had surprisingly managed to accept him, trying their best to make him feel at home. It was nice, spending time with people who actually enjoyed his company, not just his dick.

But Valentino didn't see it that way. He was content on Angel coming back to the studio, every day spamming voice messages and vicious texts. He had promised Angel consequences for disappearence, and fuck, who knows what Val could make up this time.

He threw his blanket over himself, and fumed by himself. Fuck Valentino! Always ruining every good thing that ever happened to him!

He felt himself grit his teeth at the thought of the contract he had signed. How had he been so fucking stupid? He didnt even think about the consequences, he just signed, thinking it was a nice gig! Of course he did! He was just a fucking whore, who noone cared about!

He felt his anger blow up, as bright as a bomb fire.

Picking up his chair, he threw it across the room, screaming. His eyes flaming with pure fire, he completely smashed his mirror, throwing it on the floor, blinded by fury and misery. Make-up supplies scattered across the room as he pushed his shelves over,his chandelier getting ripped off the ceiling, landing on the floor with a loud clatter.

Tears rolled down his cheeks as he wrecked his room, but he didn't wipe them away, he only continued his rampage. He even flung his secret supply of drugs across the room, his crack scattering across the carpet.

Charlie tried to suppress a whimper as she heard Angels screams and the sound of everything being thrown and wrecked. Despite the urge to go comfort him, she knew her presence would only make him fume even more, so she decided to let him fight this on his own.

``I write poems to burn by firelight...``

``FUCKING IDIO-``

Angel stopped mid sentence as he heard A terrified squeal come from the corner of his room. His pet pig, Fat Nuggets, gapped at him, his eyes widened and completely horrified. The animal was shaking, his meaty legs looking as if they were about to give way. Despite seeing Angel act like this before, he hadn't ever seen him THIS upset and furious.

Angel felt a sharp pain stab at his heart as he saw the traumised look on his pigs face.

``Shh. It's okay, Nuggets, mommy's here.``he cooed to the pig, cuddling up to his beloved animal. ``Im so sorry...I promise, Nuggs, it'll never happen again.``

The pig only let out a loud oink, and Angel took that as an 'apology accepted'.

He smiled at Nuggets, and leaped over the remains of his furniture, climbing onto his bed, patting the blanket, signalling for the pig to jump up. Nuggets obeyed, and snuggled up to Angel as the spider laid under his sheets, pulling out a notebook from under his pillow.

``Hm, you got any ideas for tonight's poem?`` he questioned his pet, glancing at Nuggets. Nuggs let out another oink, and Angel snorted. ``Fine then. Looks like it's up to me then!``

Every night Angel wrote a poem to try and get his mind off things, whether it was a bitchy one about Valentino, or maybe a peaceful one, about a warm summers day or whatever shit he came up with. It was first suggested by Charlie, as she said writing helps her get her mind off things. Not like he had ever admitted it, but Charlie's suggestion had fairly helped. Writing made him peaceful, and it let him use his creativity as much as he wanted.

``Andddddddd ta da!!!``he finished off his sentence, and presented it to Fat Nuggets. He let out a squeal of approval.

``Drink Champagne and guzzle gin...``

``Its great, ain't it Husky-?`` Angel said proudly, taking the paper back from Husk.

The Bartender let out a grunt. ``Its alright.``

He hadn't particularly enjoyed Angels poem, but from what he heard upstairs several minutes ago, he didn't dare piss off his boyfriend. He knew about all the shit Valentino caused Angel, and he was willing to listen to Angels complaints and help him through it, despite the fact that Angel protested it was fine.

``Surely it's better than just alrighttt~`` Angel smirked, playing with Husks bow tie. The cat rolled his eyes and let the spider plant a kiss on his cheek as he went get some champagne as well as gin from his storage.

``Hows work been?`` the bartender raised a brow at the spider, putting down the bottles, and pouring them each a shot.

``Ya know, the usual. Val's plannin' a new movie.``Angel shrugged, taking a sip.

Husk sighed, not getting the answer he wanted. He wanted Angel to be honest with him, instead of being fake about his feelings.

``You know, you can tell me if-``

``Yeah, yeah, I know! Nothings wrong!``Angel responded stubbornly. He took a large chug at his beverage, and pleaded for more. Before he knew it, he was madly drunk, and was soon spitting out random nonsense.

``Shit, Angel.``Husk muttered under his breath.

``Good girls call me "the town bicycle"..``

``I knowwwww, but maybe we can plan out some yoga and mindfulness classes!``Charlie squealed, taking Vaggies hands.

``Hun-``The Moth demoness tried to interrupt, but the princess went on.

``It would definitely help! He'd be able to talk about his feelings, and we could avoid any more disasters! And,if he ever lost his temper, we could get a few punching bags, so he could use them to get his anger out on, instead of his room...and Oo! We could have scented candles everywhere, and cute little furry animals-!``she beamed, her eyes lighting up.

``Charlie, you know how he is...``Vaggie mumbled as she continued brainstorming about ways she could help Angel. ``You really think we can help him? Maybe he enjoys being the town bicycle...``

``Lighten up Vaggie! Anyone can be redeemed! Angels just a bit broken on the inside, and it's our job to help him!``Charlie put her hands on her girlfriend's shoulders, smiling warmly at her.

``If you think it's a good idea then...I guess we can try...maybe Angel can-``

``Sumone say sumthin bout me..??!?!!?!!``A drunken Angel stumbled off towards them , his arms grasping onto their shoulders for balance.

``Oh! ANGEL-! Y-youve been drinking, huh?`` Charlie smiled awkwardly.

``FUCKKKKKKK YEs-!`` Angel drawled. ``Andd, ya know, I'm up for a nice lil' session if ya want~`` He smirked drunkingly.

``Oh, erm, ha, I think it'd be better if you went to bed... alone today, Angel! Off we go! I'll help you up the stairs-!`` Charlie offered.

Angel Dust groaned loudly as she tried helping him up the stairs. ``But I wanna ha' sum fun wi' Huskypoo~!!!" He grumbled, pointing to the bar, where Husk still sat. The cat shrugged, pouring himself some more of his drink.

``Husk! Why'd you let him get this fucking drunk after his fucking BREAKDOWN-?! He needs a cool down!`` Vaggie hissed at him.

``Dont fucking blame me! He wanted a drink, I gave him a drink! Ain't that my whole fucking job?" Husk rolled his eyes.

``Youre also his boyfriend! You're supposed to protect him, and make sure he's not fucking himself up!`` Vaggie replied harshly, glancing back at her girlfriend attempting to bring Angel back up the stairs.

``Look, if he wants to fuck himself up like this, there's no way I can convince him! Val puts him through tons of shit, and drinking helps him forget about all that for a bit! Even though I'm his fucking boyfriend, I can't help him with everything! Ofcourse I fucking love him, he's an angel when he wants to be, but your fucking out of your mind if you think he can actually get better. The only thing that will help him, is getting rid of that good for nothing pimp of his!" Husk replied sharply, turning his back on her.

Vaggies shoulders slightly sagged, and she let out a long, deep sigh.

Charlie will help him. She'll find a way to help him.

She thought, leaving Husk to his drink, and going off the help Charlie.

This is my first fanfiction!!! I hope you enjoyed, this was mainly based off of the song lyrics, but I enjoyed experimenting with all the characters different personalities! If you have any fanfiction suggestions, you can leave an ask, I'll make sure I reply to your suggestion!

[joesjunkyard]

Total price of all binders mentioned: $263(usd)

The girlfriend collective

Dylan tank bra $56 4x (black)

I got this one specifically for the high neck, I use it as it's own top as well as under things.

Readjust level: medium

The elastic band around the ribs keeps most things in place with minimal side boob.

Comfort level: high

It has has a racer back like most sports bras and I could wear it longer then most but it's relieving when I take it off.

~

tomboyx

Compression tank $49 4x (black)

This one was more for my personal comfort then strictly binding.

Readjust level: high

The body of the tank rides up on my belly of not properly tucked in after a rest room break. It's the second loosest binder that I have and one I could wear for long periods of time.

Comfort level: medium

It's ass to try and Readjust if you're doing something else. I've tested all of these binders in and out of work and this one was worse in work then out in the public. This one is definitely for more personal use.

~

For them

Binder all day $110 illusion (navy)

This is the tightest binder I own and the most binder esque of all of them. It makes me the flat-est of all of them.

Readjust level: low

Side boob is high with the only other option being monoboob but it does not move. I don't have to pull it down or move anyone around inside.

Comfort level: low

I made the mistake of wearing it for the first time on an outing where we ate a big meal. DO NOT DO THIS. I had it take it off in the middle of the meal because I felt like I couldn't breathe. I have since learned and use it in smaller time periods. Now that I am more comfortable with it I would say my Comfort level is higher but taking it off is usually top priority.

~

Ur body

Half tank cotton compression top $48 3x (sand)

The daily binder. The only nude one I got and I'm still uncomfortable wearing white shirts so I think it's the shirts at this point. This is the loosest binder I own but it also makes me feel the most masc.

Readjust level: high

I'm constantly having to lift the guys up and put them back in place. I have to pull the binder down and if you're wearing more then 2 shirts this is AWFUL. It's nice for longer outings and in the right shirts I feel the most confident in this binder.

Comfort level: high

It's very soft with no hard seems or tags. I could honestly wear this one for days on end and would highly recommend it for a beginner binder.

~

I haven't washed them yet so I'll update when I do unless I'm gross and lazy and just never wash them. I do not bind every day. I am usually in my trusty sports bra. When I do bind I look at how I decided to bind previously, how long I did it for and if the next occasion/outfit requires it. IF I DO NOT FEEL PHYSICALLY WELL IN ANYWAY I DO NOT BIND.

I go long periods of not binding all together and letting the girls hang free. I use binding as an expression of how I want myself to look. This has been a long time coming because I've been researching binders for ages. I finally got a big kid job so I made the leap and got them finally. I hope once I put this on the internet it somehow reaches someone else. This is what I was looking for when I was doing the research myself and I hope it helps!! <3

[fawnforgold]

happy new years friends and followers! i remember doing one of these when i first joined fanfic tumblr and i’m feeling nostalgic so i thought i’d make one since it’s been awhile and i have some (positive) things to say!!

okay here goes!! putting everything under a readmore to not clog the dash <3

@tighnarly — hi baby. my princess, cupcake, gum drop, bunny baby <3 i’m so happy and grateful to have you as my future wife and i can’t wait for the day we get married. i know i mostly post about my fictional fav (albedo :p) but you’re truly all i want and need 🫶🏻 everytime i write a fanfic i’m thinking of you and me. every word i write is a love letter to you from me. i know i’m not the best with words but i hope one day you’ll be able to see you the way i see you. trust me when i say you are the most beautiful and kind human i have ever met in my life, and i’m gonna personally fight everyone and anyone who hurts you 😗 anywaysss hehe i love you sunshine 💖🫶🏻

@neuvillettes — bestieeeeeee my bestie from the westie 🫶🏻 i’m so glad we met and connected online bc now we legit our roommates and it’s so fun ��🤚🏻 like i legit dont know how to tell you how much our friendship means to me. ur fr that one person that just GETS me. you’re so kind and funny and fun to be around, but i also love that ur not afraid to be honest with me, especially when i need that tough love approach. i love you oh so much bestie 💖 oh and thank you for the art tablet i literally am still screaming over it hehe.

@suyacho — my beloved bestie 🫶🏻 there is no one i love rambling about my selfship thots about more than you. i love how i can talk to you about anything and everything 🥹🫶🏻 i especially love how patient and supportive you’ve been of me this year, because it meant the entire world to me. i’m so glad we’re besties and i can’t wait for the day i meet you irl 🫶🏻💖mwah ily bestie hehe me, kaeya, and albedo are smoochin u rn 💖 (platonic)

@auphelia — mootie sweet sweet mootie. it always makes me happy seeing you on the dash, and i especially smile whenever i see u in my tags whether it’s a fic or just a regular old post. i get so giddy whenever i talk to u bc u are fr one cool pal!! i’m so glad we’re mooties! and i have to say i can’t wait to see what more you write because you are very talented 💖

@fleur-de-leap — leap!! i know i am very sporadic with my messages but i legit get so happy to interact with you and even more so when i see/read ur art/writing! you’re so fucking talented in so many ways and every day it truly impresses me! when we made the server together that day it made me SO happy and i get so happy seeing i get messages from you 💖 thank you for being my friend through all these years, truly it’s been a blessing.

@shig-a-shig-ah — bestie!!!!! my BESTIEEEE 🥹🫶🏻 i hope u know u mean the entire world to me. i can’t believe we’ve been friends since the beginning of my writing journey, it’s wild! istg ONE DAY BESTIE, ONE DAY we will meet and it will be the best day ever 🥹🫶🏻 ily bestie mwah

@blkladyelle — elle!! my beloved!! it’s so nice whenever i see you on the dash, and i’m always especially happy whenever i get a dm from you! i hope you feel loved and happy this upcoming year and that it holds so much positivity for you. because fuck i need you to have a good year!!! i love you sm and wanted to let you know my dm’s are always open for you 🫶🏻💖

@nc-vb — mootie aka my fellow albedo lover i get so happy whenever i see u interact with me, and i want you to know i’m always rooting for you! you’re writing is so good and honestly you’ve been such a joy to talk to in dm’s, and you’re so easy to talk to. i hope this year good things happen to you, because you truly deserve the world bub 🫶🏻

@4izawas — bestie cas!! i know we just became mutuals but u are legit one of the coolest people on this app! ur writing is fucking god tier and you are legit one of the funniest fuckers i know 😭💖 can’t count the amount of times u’ve made me giggle from something u said 🤭 i’m manifesting that aizawa confesses his love to u this year!!! 💖

if you’re not listed here it’s purely either because i forgot or we didn’t talk too much this year. so, please don’t take it personally if i didn’t include you!! i love all me mooties 🫶🏻💖

[uhohdad]

Hi its the feral petty konig anin (can i be 🧸anon?)

I just love ur delulu konig sm. Hell stomp and trample everyone just to get to u💕💕. And he takes everything u do TOO seriously to the point its kinda funny.

S/o, minding their business, just casually singing: a hopeless romantic all my lifeee surrounded by couples all the time.~~~ im feeling lonely, o i wish i could find—”

Konig, immediately jumping out of his hiding bush, trampling over everyone, pushing poor ghosty to the ground: IM HERE IM COMMING I— 🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻

hi 🧸 liebe ilysm 💕💕

no bc it’s actually hilarious like you’re just doing normal human things. like yeah, getting a beer with the co-workers might be fun :) and he is just foaming at the mouth because of your betrayal to him

it’s a hot day so you pick out a summer dress to keep you cool, and he’s convinced you dressed up for him. no, wait, you’re in the same building as another man? you dressed up for him. whore.

and you’re just like sir i’ve never met you in my life :) i have no idea who you are :) i am just trying to air out my sweaty asscheeks :)

getting possessive of your laughs? jealous about others causing you joy? boy it’s not that serious.

you’re a trained killer and soldier and he’s like you’re so soft. so fragile and delicate. i have to watch out for you and protect you. meanwhile you’re crushing grown men’s skulls with your thighs and mowing the enemies down like your name is rambina.

you’re talking to ghost, your supervisor, about todays mission. something totally normal and expected of you to do. and you’re just thinking oh boy i hope i don’t fuck up too bad on todays mission :) hope i don’t friendly fire again :) and konig is convinced you two are about to rip each other’s gear off and fuck in front of everyone.

soap is just trying to be nice to the new kid on the team and konig has totally rewritten his personality to be some sleazy creep who wants to take advantage of you. and cannot make the mental leap that it actually, he, who is the sleazy creep who wants to take advantage of you.

and he’s losing his mind because hes convinced you’re doing it on purpose. that you’re some scheming mastermind and you’re torturing him and pulling his strings. and you’re like :) what should i eat for lunch today :) sammich :)

and he’s just

[aranarumei]

the stranger in the hall

hey @dirtbra1n I’ve been thinking abt ur dating sim au recently so I wrote smthing. under the cut as usual

shirahama’s gotten used to looking around while he walks. by now, it’s a comfortable rhythm—he glanced through windows, into shadows and dilapidated corners, catches passing expressions on the faces of strangers.

he’s not obvious enough for the people he’s watching to notice—or, well, more accurately, he’s not important enough for them to care—but he’s pretty sure tashiro has figured out why he seems zoned out lately. recently it seems like he’s been looking out for something, too, and it’s pulled shirahama’s attention back to the point that they end up hazily conversing whenever they’re walking together. recently it’s been about the injustice of sports clubs.

it’s a delicate balance. shirahama can’t ask if tashiro’s started having feelings—he can just hope against all odds. miyano seems to like him well enough, a fact which sometimes makes shirahama vindictively think, tashiro’s my friend, and then stew in misery.

he’d been his friend back when shirahama had played his character route, too. it was a nice route in hindsight—barely romantic and with a large focus on just learning about the ensemble cast. tashiro had been a comforting, reassuring presence amongst a cast of strange characters.

shirahama wasn’t a faceless protagonist anymore—he was a might-as-well-be-faceless side character, which wasn’t better or worse—but his relationship with tashiro had stayed.

he’s on his lonesome today, though. judging by how deserted the hallways are, he’s definitely late for class, but since he can’t remember a single thing about exams in the game, he figures he’s safe.

well, hirano talked about exams constantly. they’d had so many study dates used as blatant excuses to flirt instead of doing math. but shirahama hadn’t even cared much when he was… well. he didn’t know if he was still alive or not.

the other reason why the hallways are so deserted is that there’s an Event, and the moment shirahama recognizes this possibility is also when he sees a hunched over figure leaning against the hallway wall, face obscured. shirahama’s gotten so used to these kinds of situations happening that the first thing he checks for is the sound of miyano’s footsteps approaching.

…why does he know that?

the halls are silent. in a split second, shirahama watches the guy in front of him go almost deathly still, before his knees buckle and—

there’s a strangled voice pressed against his chest. shirahama leaps back on instinct, and the person who’d almost taken a dive two seconds ago squints at him with unfocused emotion. finally he slowly lowers himself into a sitting position on the floor and offers shirahama a wan smile. “you also late for class?”

he looks around even though he already know there’s no one in sight, and then plops down next to him. “you okay?” he asks, wondering if it’s something he’s allowed to ask. the guy may not have noticed him until now, but shirahama had spent a solid minute watching him sway around without moving.

“yeah,” the stranger breathes. “I’ve just got a weak stomach.”

“ah.”

they sit in silence for a bit. shirahama watches as the stranger tangles his fingers together in awkward patterns. he’s never seen him before, but that’s not unusual. “what’s your name?” he asks.

“you can call me ichinose. you?”

“…shirahama.” it’s been a while since he’s introduced himself to others. tashiro had already known his name, and most other people hadn’t been around him long enough to find out.

“…you should probably head to class, you know,” ichinose says. “I’ll be fine here.”

“oh, um, it’s fine,” shirahama says, unsure how to clarify that he’d just been zoning out instead of looking after him. “I’m not too excited to go, anyways…”

ichinose frowns. “well, as long as it’s not an exam I guess it’s okay,” he says. “I always end up getting really sick on those days and it’s—“ he shakes his head. “it’s not a big deal. I hope whatever’s bothering you… stops doing that, I guess.”

“random question,” shirahama says. “do you know… there’s this first year. some guy named… miyano?” the name rests oddly in his mouth. he wonders if he’s been able to say it correctly this time—without feeling.

“who?”

“random question. don’t worry about it.” his shoulders relax just a bit. “it’s… I don’t know. it’s like it’s not one thing that bothers me. it’s a bunch of really small things that feel weird to say out loud, because all of them are really just… one thing.”

ichinose snorts. “here I thought I was being vague.”

despite himself, shirahama smiles. “like I said, it’s weird to say out loud.”

he’d have to explain the reason why he’s learned to recognize footsteps. the strange kind of sickness he’d felt when running into ichinose. knowing the limits of what could and could happen to him. it was never a simple thing.

the glassy tone to ichinose’s gaze has abruptly sharpened. when he turns his head to look at shirahama it’s piercing, and he stares at him like he’s seen a ghost. his lips part in surprise. “you like someone.”

he gets chills so violent it feels like his back could snap. “what?”

ichinose has turned his gaze to the floor. “well,” he says, “since I’m graduating this year and I really doubt we’ll run into each other after that… like recognizes like, or whatever.”

nice, shirahama thinks, the game never had any love interests that are third years when you’re a first year. then he feels mortified. “and it’s a…” he trails off.

“um. yeah,” ichinose says, picking the dirt out of his fingernails. “it’s not really a—even if he wasn’t… it’s kind of a hopeless effort, you know? but I still…”

a tightness abruptly seizes shirahama’s throat. “yeah,” he manages to get out. “I know.”

[senditcolton]

I would give u my first and second borns to read a second part of the chris blurb where they confess their feelings that was beautifully written and I adore u hope ur day is lovely

as a very belated continuation of my Trinity of Terror birthday blurbs and another little 'glad to be back bonus'; here you all are. I hope you love it. continuation of this blurb.

“There’s so much beauty when your eyes lay lost in all the city lights.”

You take a deep breath, attempting to calm yourself and all the nerves that were thrumming through your body as you sit in your car in the hotel parking lot.

Part of you still couldn’t believe that this was happening. That Chris Kreider was in the city you called home. That you two met again after all these months. That he still wanted you.

Or, at least, you hope he did.

You shake your head, another effort to rest your racing heart. Even if tonight didn’t mean anything, or if it just meant that you got to reconnect with a friend, you weren’t going to spend the entirety of it twisted in your thoughts and anxieties. With one last huff of breath, you swing open your car door and start to make your way up to the hotel entrance.

As you step into the lobby, you start to make your way towards the attached restaurant, the place where Chris suggested you two dine, assuming that he was most likely waiting for you there. Your journey is stopped short when you hear your name bouncing off the tiled floors. And when you turn towards the noise, you see Chris lifting himself up off of one of the couches.

He was wearing one of his game-day suits and he looked… handsome. As handsome as you remember him always looking. You stand in place as he makes his way over to you and when he is within earshot, you finally speak.

“I thought you would be waiting in the restaurant,” you explain.

“And what type of person would I be if I didn’t escort you?” Chris says, that dimpled smile shining brightly on his face.

“Escort me? Very fancy of you, Christopher,” you laugh as he finally settles in front of you.

“Well, it’s a pretty nice place and I figured I might as well spend as much time with you as I can,” he explains, so casually you would think that he’s talking about the weather. But a part of you leaps at his words and you find yourself once again hoping for some deeper meaning hidden beneath them.

However, Chris’ face gives away nothing as he extends his arm towards you.

“Shall we?”

The soft smile sneaks on your face before you can stop it as you loop your arm in his.

“We shall.”

With that, the two of you walk arm-in-arm into the restaurant.

You are pleasantly surprised to hear that Chris did make reservations – didn’t want to risk it – and are surprised as well at how beautiful the restaurant is. Heavy white tablecloths, candles in the center of the table, large windows opening the city to you. Your heart flutters again when Chris pulls out the chair for you and waits for you to settle before looping around the table and sitting across from you.

“Always the gentleman,” you muse, looking at him, his dark eyes reflecting the candlelight between you. He doesn’t give a response except for another smile. The two of you take a moment, looking over the menu as Chris orders a bottle of red wine for you to share.

It isn’t until you’ve placed your orders do you finally look at each other, the smiles mirrored on your faces. Although, it does take all your might not to turn away from Chris’ heavy gaze.

“How have you been?” Chris asks you.

“I’ve been good. You?”

“Pretty good.”

“That’s good to hear,” you reply, a small pause falling between you and a part of you hates it. Literally yesterday, you and Chris were chatting in a café like nothing had changed between the two of you. What was the difference now? You shake it off, focusing back on him. “I see New York City is still treating you well.”

“It is. I mean, not as well as it used to but, I’m making it work.”

“What do you mean? The Rangers are doing much better. A lot of people think you have a shot this year.”

“Not everything is about hockey, you know,” he explains gently. “The city has just… changed, that’s all.” his eyes burning into you and you can almost feel him begging for you to understand the silent message laid heavy in his words.

Because if you really thought about it, what had changed about the city from the last time you two saw each other? Nothing.

Except for the fact that you weren’t there anymore.

“How about you?” Chris asks, breaking the silence and the tension between you. “Minnesota. You haven’t become a Wild fan, have you?”

“Not yet but never say never,” you tease, causing a small chuckle to fall from Chris’ lips. “No, in reality I’ve been a little preoccupied with work. But the city itself is starting to feel like home. Which is good, I suppose.”

“That’s really good to hear. I’m glad you’re happy here.”

“I’m glad you’re here. I know I’ve mentioned this before but… it’s good to see you again.”

“You too.”

Eventually, the conversation shifts back to more casual topics. He tells you about his new dog, you tell him about some random work drama, he mentions a little bit about how the hockey season is going (even though he stated earlier in the conversation that he didn’t really want to focus on hockey), you talk about the books you’ve been reading. The conversation flows again, just like it did back at the café.

You didn’t even realize how late it had gotten, how long the two of you had been talking until there is a pause and you take the moment to look around when you realize that the restaurant was almost empty. When you turn your gaze back towards Chris, you are hit with another realization of the passage of time when you notice the wax from the candles dripping down, spilling over the golden holders and onto the dish beneath.

“Shit, I didn’t realize how late it was getting,” you say and it seems that it is your words that make Chris come to a similar realization as you had just seconds prior.

“Oh, wow. I guess we have been here for a while,” he muses, glancing around the room before focusing his gaze back on you.

There is a small pause and you can tell that neither of you really wants to leave or want this night to end. But the question is, who will be brave enough to voice that desire? After a moment, you decide to take the lead.

“Well,” you start off slowly. “There is that small park right across the street from here. Maybe we could wander around there for a while. Walk off the wine. Make sure that I’m good to drive home.”

The concern of your sobriety was just an excuse – you had only one glass and were perfectly coherent. But if Chris realized that, he didn’t call you out on it. He simply ushered over the waiter and handed off his card to pay for your dinner before the two of you remove yourselves from the restaurant and waltz out of the hotel and across the street.

The park is nice, albeit a little cold. But you couldn’t blame anyone for that – that’s just what Novembers in Minnesota are like. And if it also means that maybe you and Chris walk a little closer together while you continue to talk about everything and nothing, that was just a small bonus.

You barely even notice when it starts to snow.

It’s nothing too crazy – just a light flurry. You first noticed it when you felt the snowflakes falling on your face and then saw the small white flecks had started to dot Chris’ jacket. Chris notices at about the same time you do and you both turn you face towards the sky to watch the snow come down.

“This is one thing I miss about New York,” you muse, eyes following the small flakes as they blow in the wind, sparkling as they catch the light of the lampposts that lined the sidewalk.

“You miss when it snowed? Most people hate it.”

“That’s because they are so concerned about convenience that they don’t even stop to look at how beautiful it is. The way the snow catches all of the neon lights in Time Square. Or how magical Central Park looks after a storm,” you continue, wandering away from Chris, your eyes still trained to the sky.

“You have that here, though. Don’t you?” Chris asks, following a few steps behind you.

“Yeah but… it’s just not the same,” you sigh, your hand reaching out for the nearest lamppost. “This city isn’t the same.”

Chris is silent behind you but you know he’s still there, listening to you, like he always does. Another heavy breath escapes you, the cloud of it puffing up into the air above you. You watch the snowflakes dance in the wind for a moment longer before your eyes close as you lean your weight forward, spinning around the lamppost.

You don’t expect your momentum to suddenly be stopped by a pair of hands. You open your eyes to see Chris standing in front of you, one hand resting on your waist, his body so close to you that you can feel the warmth coming off of him. His free hand lifts up to gently cup your face as his eyes stare into you and you swear you can see every unsaid word written behind his irises.

“New York City isn’t the same without you,” he whispers.

You don’t have time to respond before Chris’ hand falls to the base of your skull, pulling you closer, his lips pressing against yours.

To say it catches you off guard is… somewhat of a lie. You had hoped it would happen. Based on how close he was to you; you could see it happening. But it had never happened before so you wouldn’t have been surprised if it didn’t happen now.

But it did. It was. Chris was kissing you. After all these years, after all these intimate moments, after all this building anticipation… he was kissing you. And it took you a minute to fully realize that. And it took you another moment before you were kissing him back. But as soon as you start to relax, to melt into his arms, Chris pulls away.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that without asking. I –“

You don’t let him get another word out, pulling him back into you, crashing your lips against his. A silent confirmation that you wanted this. Thankfully, it doesn’t take Chris as long as it took you to start kissing you back. His hands wrap around your waist, pulling your body flush against his while your arms are tossed over his shoulders.

And it was perfect. Just like everyone had told you it would be back in New York. Just like you believed since the first time you met him. Just like that voice had been saying ever since you saw him again in Café Astoria.

Perfect.

[stuckinapril]

Hey !! I don’t normally send asks but you getting an asinine one made me wanna contribute to the good vibes outta spite. If u see this in ur inbox I hope ur doin good !! I don’t really use tumblr much anymore but I started following u recently actually and it’s nice seeing u post about ur life and chatting to randos like me !! I’ve personally been struggling with the mental block of putting my thoughts/feelings/creations/general self out there for Others to see, I’m not sure why. I guess I just don’t like when I can’t control or predict the outcome/reactions to things u know? Anyways I hope u have a lovely day and the universe is givin u some good things rn :-)

you are so kind omg… people like you are why i keep this blog & don’t just drop off the face of earth hahaha. but thank you! stuff like this doesn’t affect me anymore, anon hate is pretty much a given BUT i do balk at the audacity sometimes. like at one point books literally saved my life & you’re trying to tell me i don’t read??? 😭 but you must be deeply unhappy to send anon hate to begin w so there’s no point rationalizing it.

i’m doing pretty good otherwise!! most of my time has been consumed studying as of late, but i do still have time to read & take walks & go to the gym & listen to magic hour by jhene aiko on repeat. and i really recommend you do!! you never know. & also who cares what people think. like actually who cares. if you like what you’re putting out, that should be all that matters. but i do get that validation (or the lack thereof) does affect us. i hope u get to take that leap of faith and do what u want!

[chi-haku]

its 5-star day!!!! which means i get to do my fave thing and rank the album based exclusively on my first listen. ive only heard all of these once with the exception of the title so these are just first thoughts. my rankings always change insanely after like a week (looking at my maxident rankings im always like …weird!!)

rankings of the album below the cut!

1. fnf - oh my god i cant believe theyre singing abt five nights at freddys… this song is genuinely so good though; it makes me feel the same joy as i cant stop or the view does upon first listen. its emotional but its danceable, its got everything.

2. collision - THIS SONG WASNT EVEN RLLY ON MY RADAR AS A POTENTIAL FAVORITE?? (talk abt a collision haha!!) but dare i say it is actually my favorite?? (edit: its actually my second favorite) its a really fun track; this is one i would hope would get a dance tbh bcuz i think itd look really cool

3. topline - this song is such an ear worm its been stuck in my head before it even came out; it simultaneously serves cunt and bad ass at the same time; tiger jks verse eats. love the vocals in it too, and the BOM DIGGY DIGGY BOM BOM BOM BOM. its a rlly fun enjoyable song def gonna be on my list of faves

3. youtiful - i thought it was gonna be cringe which it kinda is but its also heartwarming and a bit sad. it would probably rank a bit higher if it didnt have some tough competition but ‘the universe in ur eyes’??? UGH IM BASHING MY HEAD INTO A WALL SCREAMING OK ITS CHEESY BUT ITS ALSO GREAT. our first tie because in making this these two kept switching ranks over and over

4. DLC - ok dlc standing for dance like crazy is so cute. this song makes me wanna just vibe and have a great time; just dont listen to the lyrics they make me a bit sad just a little bit. also the pre chorus whisper with a harmony right underneath? YES PLZ. eating this for breakfast this is so good

5. hall of fame - WOAH! early on i was like oh its nice but maybe not my fave until the kinda tron-ish break down before the chorus its kinda hypnotic—ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND made me giggle lol—the instrumental of this song is v interesting i like it a lot (this was actually below #6 for a hot second before i made a last minute call)

6. superbowl - you whisper in a song and thats it for me it kills me sorry!! someone said this is god menu pt 2 and it is its so good (i dont care that the lyrics are goofy i love it) this ones rank was shakey until the end that rlly sold it for me. noticing a trend of rlly strong outros on this album

6. get lit - i rlly struggled with this and superbowls ranks so theyre getting the same rank. skz knows how to make an amazing party song fr. i love a lil edm moment i wish they would do even more like side effects level breakdown

7. s-class - okay this song is a bit all over the place but kind of in a way that fucks; like its a mess in a way that if would blow my mind to play a shooter too! i do love IN’s breakdown he gets i LOOOOVE his voice. also the last bit before the end starting at like 2:35 to the end kinda reminds me of og skz in a way i rlly enjoy

8. item - really like the instrumentals they r playing w this album. im kinda predicting that this will be the song on the album that grows on me a lot; i really enjoy the breakdown towards the end and the videogame core of it all

honorable mentions (i dont rank previously released songs!!):

the sound - i didnt like this song like at all when it came out but it IS better in korean.

time out - we know her, we love her, she cant be in the rankings because she would top them and im biased cuz i listen to it all the time!

[lighthouseas]

💌?

CADYYYYYY YES YES YES I CAN TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH I ADORE U HEHEHEHE

anyways u are so sosososso nice and i love !!!!! talking to u ur seriously so sweet and one of the mutuals of all time <333 i love all of your writing ideas, you have a super creative mind . i love all of your byclair takes and fics, you make me love their dynamic so so much whereas i'd never really thought about it before. anywayssss i hope u have the loveliest day. leaps onto you and hugs you

[doyouknowhoyouare]

Omg have fun in Japan! I wish I had the guts to go on a solo trip!!

thank u! and i hope u find the courage to do so!! or just grab a friend and go with them hehe i’m currently with a lil group but we’re actually here visiting my cousin who took the leap to live out here alone so truly, if ur set on going solo it’s v much possible!! also i’ve only been here a few days but i can say it’s not too hard to get around + the people are v nice so!! manifesting a future trip to japan for u <333

[thesewordsareallihavetogive]

ch. 5: A Safe Place to Land - Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x nurse!reader

Summary: 4.6k words. After an unexpected breakup with her long-term boyfriend, y/n had one goal: to keep her head down and finish her travel nursing contract as soon as possible. That was until Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw derailed her plan entirely. Just as y/n finished picking up the pieces of her broken heart, Rooster came along and showed y/n what it’s like to be loved again–if only she’ll let him in.

chapter playlist: “Never Til Now” by Ashley Cooke and Brett Young, “You Matter to Me” from Waitress

Warnings: nothing crazy! lots of fluff, several pinches of angst, some cursing. multiple allusions to 18+ content & smut, but nothing graphic. i’m too much of a wimp to write smut but one day i’ll get there

a/n: hello hello! this chapter was a long time coming, but i’m so happy with how it turned out. i hope you guys like it!! thank u for ur patience & support xx

series master list | master list

The phrase “distance makes the heart grow fonder” is nice in theory. It’s a mantra y/n repeated to herself several times over the years when she missed her family and friends while traveling. She now found out that this mantra didn’t work as well when her not-boyfriend was somewhere on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the ocean. 

In Rooster’s absence, y/n returned to her hermit ways. On her days off from work, she’d spend countless hours reading, binge-watching shows, online shopping, and her favorite activity of all: napping. She ventured to the beach a few times but found that it wasn’t nearly as enjoyable without Bradley by her side. y/n reminisced about Rooster spinning her around until they both got dizzy or dunking her in the water, just for her to pull him in after her until they were both soaked and sore from laughing.

Over the course of the three-week mission, y/n wore Rooster’s clothes more than she wore her own. The hoodie she stole was a staple of her nightly Netflix sessions and she often fell asleep in the shirts Bradley ‘accidentally’ left at her house.

The only thing that could tempt y/n off the couch in the evenings were the sporadic calls she shared with Bradley. She jumped every time her phone rang, leaping over the coffee table and sprinting towards the counter her phone was on, only to be disappointed when it wasn’t Bradley. The few times that he was on the other end of the phone talking to her made her forget all her woes.

There were a couple times y/n missed Rooster’s calls because she was at work. Aside from the sad sinking feeling inside, she felt like shit. Bradley always made sure to leave a voicemail. Though he did miss hearing her voice, he was never bitter when y/n missed his calls; she had a job to do, just like him.

y/n was comforted by the way her bed sheets still smelled like Rooster. Old spice and jet fuel and safety. She desperately clung to the remnants of Bradley’s lingering presence in her home. The night she felt the most alone was the same night her sheets stopped smelling like him. Despite her desire to hang on to any trace of Rooster, she was overdue to wash her bedding. She laid awake that night, tossing and turning in her fresh clean sheets. Had her bed always been this cold?

Instead of being lulled to sleep as she inhaled the comforting aroma as she’d done for the past two weeks, y/n found herself turning to Bradley’s voice for comfort. She had three months' worth of random voicemails he’d left her. 

His morning voice drifted from the speakers–the voicemail in question was delivered before 6 a.m. a little over a month ago. Rooster wanted to call to say good morning before a god-awfully early training session, but y/n was still fast asleep.

“Hey, baby. Just wanted to say good morning. It’s…” Rooster paused to look at the clock on his dash. “5:29 a.m. So you’re probably still asleep. Which is a good thing, because this is way too fucking early to be up and moving,” he cleared some of the morning grog from his throat. “Anyway… I’ll talk to you later. Have a good day, darlin’.”

y/n smiled warmly as his words rolled over her. She remembered how they spent the evening after his training. Bradley and y/n had planned to watch a movie or two at home, but they both fell asleep against each other on the couch by 8:30 p.m.

The next voicemail featured a very tipsy Rooster. y/n would dare to say drunk, but Rooster prided himself on not getting drunk because he was a self-proclaimed heavyweight. Lively chatter from The Hard Deck could be heard in the background. Bradley didn’t go out with his coworkers nearly as much as he did before he met y/n, so on the rare occasion that y/n worked night shifts, Bradley distracted himself from his loneliness by hanging around his old stomping ground.

“Hey! y/n! Oh, shit, you’re working,” Bradley pouted, suddenly remembering the reason he went to the bar in the first place. “I miss you. Pool isn’t nearly as fun without you,” he cut himself off with a chuckle then a heavy sigh. He wasn’t wasted, but he definitely wouldn’t remember this in the morning.

The rest of his words weren't quite intelligible. y/n suspected Bradley got roped into a game of darts or was handed another shot based on the groan he let out before the message ended.

The final voicemail y/n listened to before drifting off to sleep was from just a few days ago, directly from the aircraft carrier’s satellite phone.

“Hi, baby. It’s me.” y/n could tell from his voice alone that he was exhausted. The communications room on the ship was mostly quiet. Rooster all but sprinted there to be first in line to make a phone call home. There was a brief pause of silence before Bradley spoke again. “God, I miss you so much. I can’t wait to get back home to you… take care of yourself for me, okay?” Rooster sighed heavily.

At the end of the message, Rooster let out a deep exhale–like there was something else to say, but the words couldn’t quite escape his lips.

Bradley Bradshaw had been holding himself back from saying three little words since the day he was deployed. He almost told y/n he loved her right before he left her house the morning of his mission. In the peaceful quiet of the early morning darkness, Bradley realized he was irrevocably and unequivocally in love with y/n y/l/n.

He convinced himself that it would’ve been cruel to tell y/n he loved her for the first time just before he left for a mission. What if he didn’t come back? Not only would she be left grieving Rooster, but she’d also be stuck mourning everything that could’ve been. Bradley couldn’t bear to burden her with that.

So the words were left unsaid for the time being. Every time Rooster and y/n spoke on the phone, I love you was perched on the tip of his tongue. With each passing day, the words rattled around his brain and begged to be said out loud.

That all changed after a close call during one of the mission flights. Rooster toed the line between risky and deadly a little too haphazardly. He noticed the enemy missiles soaring towards him far later than he should’ve, but just in the knick of time to launch his own flares and avoid the fiery explosion. The aftermath of the missile attack sent Bradley into a mental tailspin.

Rooster concluded that dying without ever having told y/n he loved her simply wasn’t an option. A world in which y/n never knew just how much she meant to Bradley was unfathomable.

But she deserved better than being told I love you for the first time from a satellite phone with spotty reception. No, Rooster needed to be sure she heard every word he was saying. He needed her to see just how much he meant it; how his words were the absolute truth. He wanted–no, craved–to hold y/n in his arms and hold her gaze with his own when he finally confessed his feelings.

On the other side of the world y/n mindlessly scrolled through her email while one of Rooster’s vinyl records played softly in the background.

A few weeks ago, y/n got a record player for her house because Rooster stated that vinyl “just sounds better.” She rarely touched the record player; it was pretty much reserved for Rooster’s use exclusively whenever he was at her house. Of course, the compromise wasn’t one-sided. Rooster caved and bought a bluetooth speaker so y/n could play her seemingly countless playlists.

“Why listen to one album at a time when you could listen to a hundred different songs on shuffle?!” y/n argued enthusiastically. She was over the moon about Rooster’s latest purchase. The small speaker sitting on the kitchen counter had y/n pulling Bradley off the couch and into an uncoordinated dance.

“This is so stressful,” Rooster whined when there was an abrupt shift from Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” to “You Outta Know” by Alanis Morissette. If it weren’t for y/n’s wide grin and bright eyes, Rooster might’ve second guessed the purchase.

In Bradley’s absence, the record player was the only thing she’d been listening to music on. In fact, she was listening to Rooster’s albums exclusively. Less than a day had passed after y/n bought and set up the record player when he brought over a box of vinyl records. y/n sat on Bradley’s lap on her living room floor, his arms wrapped around her waist, as she thumbed through the box. Her eyebrows knitted together when she saw that more than half of the box was full of his favorite records.

“Roos, these are your favorites,” y/n said, confusion in her tone as she pulled out a Jerry Lee Lewis album to prove her point. “Why are you leaving them here?” Bradley nestled his head further into her neck and pressed a gentle kiss against her pulse point.

“So you can develop taste,” he teased jokingly. y/n scoffed and lightly swatted his arm with her free hand. A soft smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he turned y/n around in his lap to face him. “I’m over here a lot anyways. We can listen to them together,” he suggested before pressing a sweet kiss against her lips.

y/n’s reminiscing was cut short when three new emails stopped her in her tracks. Her stomach dropped when she realized they were all new contract offers from the travel healthcare agencies she worked with. Each of the contracts she was sent were in one of her ‘bucket list’ cities. One in particular was a contract she’d been hoping for for years–it was a specialty trauma center job in Boston. The other two contracts nearly made her eyes bug out of her head; the salary was almost double what she was currently making at the base hospital.

Three months ago, signing any of the offered contracts would’ve been a no-brainer.

When y/n was with Ethan, she factored his deployments and where he’d be stationed into deciding what contracts she would accept. But she never held back or hesitated to sign a dream contract thousands of miles away, even if it meant they wouldn’t see each other for quite a while.

From the very first moment y/n arrived at the Navy base, she couldn’t wait to leave. She was desperate to erase any trace of Ethan from her life.

Now? Her chest tightened just thinking about how far away each of the jobs were.

y/n had a wanderlust soul for as long as she could remember. She was happiest when she was on the move, jumping from city to city, coast to coast. It could be a lonely lifestyle, but it was something of her own. Something she could control. 

y/n wasn’t averse to commitment; she had a wedding board on Pinterest up until three months ago. Staying in one place and setting down roots never seemed to interest her though.

Not until now.

Now, she had something to stick around for. y/n couldn’t remember the last time she felt like she had a true home. The Navy base wasn’t her home, not by a long shot, but Bradley Bradshaw sure as hell felt like one.

For the first time, she considered staying.

The thought of her contract ending soon had been eating y/n alive for the past few weeks. The realization that staying at North Island, staying with Rooster, was an option threw her for a loop. She’d been on the go for so long that she forgot what it felt like to settle down. After that revelation, all of y/n’s missing pieces seemed to fall into place. The relief she felt was unmatched by anything she’d ever felt before. The weight of the world and her heavy heart vanished, replaced by a feeling of wholeness. Unfortunately, it was short-lived; killed off by a dark thought creeping into her mind.

What if Rooster didn’t want her to stay?

After pulling into y/n’s driveway, Rooster shut the door of his bronco as quietly as he could. He fished the front door’s spare key from underneath a potted plant, unlocked the door, and shut it silently behind him. He found his quiet movements weren’t really necessary when he heard one of his ‘80s vinyl records playing loudly. The electric guitar riffs and heavy drum solos all but blocked out every other noise—save for y/n’s loud singing and the clanging of pots and pans in the kitchen as she cooked dinner.

Rooster came to the end of the hall and leaned against the door frame of the kitchen, watching y/n dance around while she used a spatula as a microphone. She looked so happy and carefree; Bradley almost felt bad for interrupting her solo dance party. Almost, but not enough to stop himself.

When there’s a brief pause in between tracks, punctuated by crackling from the record player, Bradley cleared his throat. y/n shrieked and jumped, her eyes shooting wide open as she flung the spatula in her hand with the force of an Olympic javelin thrower toward the source of the noise. Rooster narrowly dodged the projectile metal utensil flying past his head.

Bradley turned to y/n with a surprised smirk, impressed by her aim. Once she registered that it was Rooster standing in her kitchen and not an intruder (she’d been watching a lot of Criminal Minds to pass the time), her jaw dropped and she stood frozen in place.

Bradley and y/n hadn’t spoken in several days. With the mission coming to its end, Rooster was busier than ever. When he wasn’t flying, in briefings, or going over flight plans and strategies until his brain turned to mush, he was savoring every spare moment he could get to scarf down a meal in mere minutes or sleep.

Bradley told y/n he’d be back in North Island on a Friday. That was true at the time. Just over a week into the mission, plans changed. The timeline was moved up, making the crew substantially busier, but it also meant they’d be back to the base on Thursday, a full day earlier. Rooster might have left out this development during the brief phone calls he shared with y/n.

When the shock wore off, y/n launched herself at Bradley, nearly knocking him backward in the process. Her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms were linked behind his neck, clinging to him like her life depended on it. If it were anyone else, Rooster might’ve protested the way y/n’s limbs constricted around him tighter than he thought possible, making his muscles ache and his lungs strain for air. But it wasn’t anyone else, it was y/n.

So, the aviator held her just as tight, burying his face into her hair and pressing gentle kisses throughout. Bradley hoped that the hug could tell y/n everything his words couldn’t.

y/n let up from squeezing Rooster to pull back and look at him. Her eyes dotted across his face in disbelief, like she wasn’t sure he was real. Her fingers traced across his sun-kissed cheeks, memorizing each new freckle, before ghosting her thumb over his bottom lip. The heavy beating of his heart against her chest and his calloused hands rubbing the bottoms of her thighs let her know he was really there. Bradley delivered a pinch to her ass with a smirk, further solidifying that she wasn’t dreaming.

She was still at a loss for words, so she did the next best thing. y/n kissed Bradley hard and deep, mustering as much of the three weeks’ worth of longing as she possibly could into a single kiss. She was quick to take charge as their tongues danced together, but Rooster soon gained dominance. He backed y/n up against a wall, his muscled thigh holding her weight as one hand tangled in her hair and the other explored the curves he’d missed so dearly. 

Their lips stayed locked until they damn near turned blue. Both of their eyes were wild as they pulled apart. Few words were exchanged before they began stumbling towards y/n’s bedroom, only making it halfway before they collapsed onto the couch.

The dinner on the stove was long forgotten.

Bradley laid in a daze on the couch, chest rising and falling as y/n grabbed water from the kitchen for them. He propped himself up on his elbows just in time to see y/n sauntering back in wearing his old Navy t-shirt with a glass in each hand. He licked his lips as he took in her appearance. Her hair was a mess, thanks to him, yet it still framed her face in breathtaking trusses. Her swollen red lips were almost as gorgeous as the mischievous grin she wore, her eyes glimmering as she took Bradley in.

He sat back in awe, his lips parted in the dopey grin y/n occasionally teased him for. This is it, he thought. Rooster hadn’t had a serious girlfriend since his days at UVA, and even then they were few and far between. Technically, he and y/n weren’t dating, but he was ready to spend the rest of forever with her.

Once Bradley’s haze wore away, he remembered one of the many things he’d been planning to ask y/n once he got back. His fingers brushed against hers as she handed him the glass of water before she curled into the other end of the couch with her feet resting in Bradley’s lap.

“So… I’ve been meaning to ask you,” Bradley began while he gently massaged her calves. “The Navy ball is in three weeks. I honestly don’t like going to these events, but I’m in the running to win an award so I have to at least show my face. I was wondering… if you’d like to go with me? As my date?” he asked hesitantly. Rooster hoped y/n didn’t catch the way he nervously gulped in between sentences.

y/n looked like a deer caught in headlights. She was hoping to delay this conversation for another day at least. She just wanted one night to exist in their happy little bubble. But reality was bound to set in, whether she liked it or not.

Maybe this is when the other shoe drops, y/n thought. Things had been so good, maybe even too good, for the past few months. All good things come to an end, and she feared this was it.

So, she sucked in a breath and put on a brave face. She’d gotten pretty skilled at masking her emotions over the years, but Bradley saw right through her. He was always able to, right from the beginning.

“Roos, I would love to, it’s just um… my contract, it uh- it ends in a week,” y/n finished meekly, rushing the words out. It got really quiet then.

More emotions than y/n could count flashed across Rooster’s face before he finally sat up straight to look at her, his eyes never wavering from her face. His heartbroken look had her regretting every second she didn’t let him know she’d be leaving soon.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Bradley asked, his voice quiet. y/n couldn’t meet his eyes. She looked down at her hands twisted in her lap and willed the water rimming her eyes to go away. When her tears started to fall, Bradley moved down the couch and held her face, gently wiping the tears away with his thumbs.

y/n sniffled and met his eyes, placing her hand over his against her cheek.

“I didn’t want you to worry about me while you were away,” she smiled sadly. “I didn’t want to distract you, and I didn’t want to mess up what we have going here. I don’t want to mess up what we have,” y/n emphasized at the end, holding Bradley’s gaze and making sure he heard her. She was bound to cry harder if she stayed on the same train of thought, so she switched to the facts.

She told Bradley about her contract, its duration and her official end date. She told him what her options were going forward and about the three new contracts she’d already been offered. Rooster heard what she said, but it wasn’t all processing. He was lost in his head and maybe caught every three words. y/n took a deep breath before she spoke again.

“I was thinking about-“

“Stay.” Bradley blurted out, eyes wide once he realized what he said out loud.

“-staying,” y/n finished with a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips. He took the words right out of her mouth.

Bradley, whose mind was still running a mile a minute, hadn’t processed y/n’s admission yet and dove into an on-the-fly plan to talk y/n into staying.

“You could find another contract around here! Or extend the one on base? You could take some time off. You could stay with me for a bit! Or I can help you with rent if you’re worried about that when you’re not working. Shit, that’s a lot, but the point is-” Bradley continued, bordering on manic, his hands waving around as he spoke mostly to himself.

y/n shushed him and cupped his face in her palms, just like he had moments ago.

“Bradley, did you hear me?” y/n asks slowly, enunciating every word. Rooster huffs.

“Unfortunately, yes. Your contract is almost over and you’re leaving,” he left out the “me” at the end, but there was an unspoken understanding that it belonged there. The typically confident and bright-eyed aviator looked heartbroken and lost. y/n hated that she made him feel like that, even for a second.

“No, Brad. I mean yeah, my contract is almost up, but I’m thinking about staying. If you’ll tolerate me hanging around,” y/n said with a wink, biting her lip in anticipation.

“Are you serious?” Rooster’s face is void of emotion, just wide eyes and a slack jaw as he waited for her answer.

“Yeah, if that’s oka-” before y/n could finish, Bradley jumped off the couch and scooped her up with him. He spun them around in a dizzying circle, pressing his lips against hers with a force that almost rivaled their earlier kiss in the kitchen.

y/n laughed as Rooster peppered kisses across her face when he finally put her down, keeping his hands planted firmly on her hips even after he was sure she had a stable footing.

“That’s okay with you? If I stay?” y/n asked with a hesitant grin, her eyes searching his for any sign of doubt. She found none.

“That’s more than okay. That’s- that’s everything,” Bradley chuckled breathlessly, pulling y/n into him by her hips. With her face mere inches from his, he rested his forehead against hers. “Please don’t go,” he whispered, eyes shut as he held his breath.

“I think I can manage that,” y/n said with a cheeky smile. Bradley chuckled again; deep and full and happy. He pulled her against him and locked his lips with hers until his lungs ached.

The burning reminded him of his brush with death on the mission and all the things he would’ve never been able to say. When their lips finally pulled apart, Bradley held y/n at arm's length so he could look her in the eye.

“I love you,” Bradley stated like it was a fact. Because it was. y/n gasped, one hand gripping his arm tight as she took a step back in shock. His chest rose and fell as he tried to catch his breath, but his head was absolutely clear. Bradley recognized the shock and maybe even a hint of fear on y/n’s face and he understood. Hell, he was scared out of his mind when he first realized just how in love with y/n he was. He smiled and shook his head, tracing his fingers soothingly along her exposed skin. “You don’t have to say it back, but I just need you to know. I love you, y/n.”

Tears brimmed y/n’s eyes and her face cracked into a wide smile.

“Take me to bed, Bradshaw.”

Rooster and y/n’s legs were tangled together underneath her sheets as they came down from their respective highs, both deeply sated.

y/n was absolutely spent—it had been a rollercoaster of an evening. Her eyes were on the verge of fluttering shut, her hair was wildly spread across the pillow, and a thin layer of sweat covered most of her skin. Rooster was certain she’d never looked more beautiful. y/n would’ve scoffed at him if he said that out loud. Moonlight streamed through the open window blinds, highlighting y/n’s features. It also illuminated a hickey Bradley was sure she’d give him shit about later, but for now, he enjoyed the sight.

Bradley ran his fingers through y/n’s hair and kissed her temple before speaking softly.

“y/n, baby,” he cooed quietly to get her attention. In her tired state, y/n simply offered him a small hum and turned into his chest, giving him what remained of her attention.

“How would you feel about making things official?” Rooster asked as casually as he could, poorly veiling his anxiousness. y/n laughed breathlessly and entwined her fingers with his before rolling halfway on top of him. She reached up to caress his jaw with her free hand, finally opening her tired eyes to meet his.

Bradley was nervous. He was holding his breath; y/n knew this because his chest wasn’t moving anymore, she could only feel the steady thump thump of his heart beating against hers. Whether y/n knew it or not, she held Bradley’s heart in her hands. It was hers to break or have forever, and this was the deciding moment.

“I’d like that a lot,” y/n whispered, a sleepy smile spread across her face before she closed the gap between them.

“Good,” Rooster said gruffly against y/n’s lips before he flipped her over, pinning her beneath his body once again. y/n’s contagious laughter cut through the darkness as Bradley’s mustached lip traced down the side of her body.

Three months after the most fateful ER trip of his life, Rooster had never been so happy to have his arm sliced open and get stitches. He’d been on the run for most of his adult life; he forgot what it was like to have a home. For the first time in a long time, staying still didn’t terrify him. Bradley thanked his lucky stars that the woman wrapped in his arms decided to stick around and settle down with him.

After flying solo for so long, Bradley Bradshaw finally found a safe place to land.

a/n: AHHH?!? pls lmk what y'all think!! there's one final part for this series -- the ✨epilogue✨ i'm so excited about it omg. have a good day & stay safe luvs <33