#hope this helps at least one person

[somegrumpynerd]

Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them

[insomnya777]

gem and joel are jily variants send post

[takami-takami]

TRIGGER WARNING: Hawks x reader. Minors DNI. Trauma. Pedophilia/incest. Comfort/support for that. Do not add any harmful comments or tags. Subject matter is not for everyone, so please ONLY read if this will not trigger you, as I will be making no attempt to censor this or any explicitness.

"Is there something wrong with me," you ask.

Those words are the last to leave your lips. Putting your secrets to words feels as if you've allowed the fluid that filled the cavity of your chest to spill; that fluid being a sacrilegious amalgamation of sorts, an unholy blend of suicidal dread and utterly childlike rage.

Keigo catches them. He picks them up like he does your hands in the cradle of his palms. 

You could count the creases in those palms just as easily as you could Keigo's smile lines, or the crinkles at the corners of his eyes when you make him laugh from his belly. You could sketch Keigo's fingerprints from memory, you're positively sure.

"There's something wrong with what happened to you," Keigo answers. "But no. There's nothing wrong with you."

For once, you feel no obligation to correct him. His emphasis on happened is deliberate, and you allow it. After years of gentle coaxing, from the first time he nearly cried the word baby the first time you told him, you feel no need to compare what didn't happen to what did. You feel no desire to hide in shame of what could have been worse. You feel no obligation to inscribe a caveat into your own experience.

You feel no performance in your childhood death.

If anyone understands the intricacies and complexities that line a traumatic past, if there's anyone you can trust, it's him. His voice crackles with empathy like candlelight in the dim of your shared bedroom. 

Try as you might to find it, there is no pity in his words. They are neither rehearsed nor forced. 

Keigo's words are perfect, and they are for you.

"Is this okay," he further asks before he lifts your hand to his cheeks; and it cracks your shell down its center. You nod and you mean it.

Simple, unfamiliar words; finally, finally, finally uttered by someone who should be saying them to you. A person unrelated to you by blood, a man of the appropriate age promises to crawl inside your body and it's so innocent and sweet. His words taste of sugarcane and smell like the pinkest sakura petals, dancing as they fall like stars and landing with a comparable delicateness.

Keigo's words remind you of the morning he tried cooking you pancake stacks with whipped cream and strawberries. They remind you of how the edges of the batter crisped golden brown with char because he was too distracted by the way you laughed at his quips that came to his throat easily.

From your chest, a giggle— another word you can say now, with him. 

Giggle. Neighborhood. One day, when you and Keigo raise your own little ones and watch them tussle and toddle trying to carry the weight of their untainted wings, you're sure you will be able to say the word family again.

For now, his chaste kiss to your bruised yet healing knuckles is enough.

[atthebell]

how to clip (redneck ash atthebell edition aka not the most efficient necessarily)

my best methods for clipping & posting to tumblr

tl;dr use clipr for downloading clips from twitch, other methods vary by mileage

Clip on Twitch & Download using Clipr

IMO, this is the best method for posting clips. Twitch clips don't always display properly on Firefox, and it also means that if the clip ceases to exist on Twitch for whatever reason, it's still uploaded to Tumblr. You can also guarantee the quality you're downloading in, which is usually 1080p unless the streamer has for some reason lowered their stream quality (happens by accident sometimes).

Downsides: 1) You have to be able to download the clip to your computer, and doesn't work on mobile. Well, it could, but it would be way more difficult and I don't know why you would do that to yourself. 2) If the moment you want to clip is longer than 60 seconds, you have to use another method. Twitch only lets you clip something that long. I bemoan this fact every day.

Screen capture on your computer

The pros of this method are that you aren't limited to 60 seconds, and if you're trying to clip something from a YouTube video, it's easier than trying to download a YouTube clip (have never been able to successfully do this myself) or downloading the entire video and then editing it down to the moment you want to clip.

The cons are that you have to make sure you're not screen capturing sensitive shit from your own computer, and you have to turn off all other audio and make sure your volume levels & video quality are at appropriate levels (aka don't have your volume super low, don't have the video on 480p if possible). If you're clipping off YouTube, you have to deal with having the channel's watermark in the corner, but otherwise it's great for when you want to just clip something from Twitch but it's longer than 60 seconds.

How to do this (on Windows):

Remember to put your computer on DND (Discord as well) and put the video on highest quality and decent volume levels. Press Windows key + G (if that's your configuration) and select "Start Recording" on the capture window. Remember to give time for the scrub bar and shit from YouTube or Twitch (or whatever) to go away, so go back a little bit before where you want the clip to start. Record until you've got what you want, then open it in whatever video editing software pleases you. You can find the recording in Captures on your computer (usually in some folder chain in Users) or by just pressing Windows key + G again, it'll let you open the recording in file location. I use Microsoft Clipchamp to edit because Windows Media Player crashes my computer and I'm not going to pay for nice editing software rn. Anyway, edit out the bits with you moving your mouse around and the video player UI and get it to whatever length you like. Save or redownload to your computer, upload to Tumblr.

Downloading off Twitter

Use twittervideodownloader or twdown. Copy the video address from the video and paste it, then download in whatever quality you'd like. Please attribute said clips, particularly if they went through the trouble of adding subtitles or you're using their translation (or just to let people know where they came from-- i.e. is this from a cc's own IG story, or is it a random fan recording them; the latter means you maybe shouldn't be reposting this video). Translation itself is often a thankless project so it's very appreciated to acknowledge translators. Also if someone else went through the trouble of clipping something, it's just nice to acknowledge them for it. Preferably include a link to the original tweet. This method is best for just needing stuff off Twitter, for IG stories that someone else already screen captured, or if the only clip you can find is on Twitter and the original vod/video is gone for whatever reason.

Extra fun tips:

If you are a frequent clipper, get in the habit of naming your files! If you're keeping them all on your computer, for organization's sake, it will save you SO much time and energy if you just have names on your files. It doesn't have to be anything crazy formal; for example, my format is just "oct 12 cellbit scared by sign tts;" date followed by a very short description.

Similar to the above, it also helps to include some amount of context to clips when you're posting them, particularly if you're not liveblogging. Sometimes people rb clips onto my dash and start freaking out about some kind of lore going on and it's like dude this clip is from two months ago, calm down. Please turn on timestamps also for the love of fuck.

You can download videos straight off Tumblr! If someone else already posted a clip you like and want to have on your computer, you can download it off the dash or off their blog and just have it, no extension or screen capture or website needed. One of the very cool things about this website!

Related, if you really want to find a clip that you know was already posted to Tumblr by someone else, use people's archives. They're also one of the actually functional parts of this website. You can filter by post type, month, and tags, which can usually get you closer to finding what you're looking for than searching will.

RoyalArchivist tends to post and reblog a lot of clips, so they're a good resource alongside myself, pix pixiecaps, and jay cellgatinbo, all of whom clip like maniacs. I also just reblog a lot of things and have a pretty extensive tagging system. RA also has a timestamp archive for QSMP with notes about lore and things-- please check that out if you're interested in helping document events or looking to find a certain moment.

MCYT Archive Project has public vods spreadsheets for QSMP as well as other MCYT projects that are incredibly extensive, so if you're looking for a moment and you remember the date, you should be able to find the vod on the sheet. You can also use the vod archives in junction with wiki articles to figure out exactly or approximately when something happened (the QSMP Miraheze wiki includes citations in their articles, which is a massive help for this kind of thing).

Finally, I am a lunatic who figured this all out through trial and error. There are probably other, somewhat more efficient methods, like I said at the start. If you know of any, please (politely) add onto the post.

[swordmaid]

i am wide awake thinking about that post canon jb au again when I should be sleeping …!!! such is the nature of the jbrainrot…

[mgu-h]

the source for this says it was after the brazilian gp and idk man after everything to still take time to sign things for fans says a lot

[herashifts]

if you’ve been in the shifting community for a while, you’ve probably noticed the common thread of positivity and keeping a positive/optimistic mindset. while that 100% works for some people, sometimes you’re not positive. sometimes you’re just angry. and why not use that to shift?

so, introducing……

⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆ 𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℝ𝔸𝔾𝔼 𝕄𝔼𝕋ℍ𝕆𝔻 ⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺

get comfortable.

take some deep breaths, count, or anything that gets you into that calm, relaxed meditative state before shifting.

visualize yourself standing in the void.

you have claws on your fingers and are so strong. you are an unstoppable force.

remember where you want to go. remember the people, experiences, and feelings connected to that reality.

know that it’s yours already, you just have to get there.

begin to move forward.

there is resistance, ropes and chains of energy tugging at you like spider webs, but your claws are sharp and your arms are strong.

scream and weep and howl. your fury gives you strength.

visualize tethers connected to you to something far behind you. these are your ties to your OR. sever them. you don’t need them anymore. you are free.

move forward. cut and destroy anything trying to stop your progress. you are unshakable. your will is indomitable. keep moving.

rip into the veil with your claws. slice it to ribbons. make clear the path.

keep moving forward. do not stop.

scream as much as you want. here, your anger is a blessing and your determination is unshakable.

your sorrow and grief can be your fuel just as your rage is.

keep going until you either fall asleep or feel yourself in your DR.

rip and tear until it’s done.

[fruitybashir]

this is probably the weirdest compliment a writer can get, but i started taking my depression meds and they literally killed my abilitity to cum, and your fic... did miracles

SCREAM????!????@????? hiii :3

[harbingersecho]

Lasombra fashion show?

Now how did you know I've been meaning to draw fashion 'shows' for all the clans…?

But! Here's some Lasombra fashion stuff for you!

+ bonus because I love bullying Lasombra abt their tech issues (:

[tidepoolalgae]

hello spones nation (insp)

[ganondoodle]

hope everyone had alright holidays!

a few days ago when we were driving home in the dark in windy and rainy weather after getting two of my siblings from the train we, for the first time in my lifetime im pretty sure, hit a deer that was crossing the street, none of us saw them before they got caught in the headlights and the first one made it over but we werent yet slow enough to not hit the second one ...

the deer lived but was kinda stunned, my dad pushed it off the street and while we were still on the phone with police it got up and ran away but my parents car got damaged and while its still drivable there are several parts that got bent and since its an older model too it might be hard to get it repaired

anyway, i didnt know deer fur was that grey until i saw it stuck to our bumper :(

merry crisis

[hi-note]

angel? but not quite. not quite alive, not quite dead, they became something else on the basis of taking a form where they could help people out with their struggles, and observe what goes on in a day-to day life, not to record any info, but just for amusement’s sake.

i made this character because i just started a playthrough of animal crossing and got maple in my town, and also the fact i heard this track in the background of a video:

also i just made a ref but at the VEEERY end i just said “i dont have to make a background for this, but like, i honestly kindof wanna” and that was the right choice because i watched 1 (one) cloud tutorial, which made this piece, and it also is just very pretty visually, like, this nearly came out how i envisioned it in my head-

[kyojuuros]

knowing communication is vital to a healthy relationship but never knowing how to start a conversation or holding back because you don't want to burden them with your emotions or say/do something that will push them away and just generally being socially inadept is such a fun time! :)

[thejoyofdeduction]

hi, i have been searching for a way to purchase the "new" edition of the 221 BBC book by bert coules but i can only find it on gasogene books who only ship within the US. does anyone in europe own this book and/or can give me a suggestion on how to buy it? i wouldn't even mind shipping fees...

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

going through a really difficult time right now, because the texas pharmacy chain that has been reliably filling my opioid prescription for years suddenly decided they would no longer accept prescriptions from my doctor because she isn't a pain specialist.

they did not give any of her patients any warning about this, only informed us when we called to refill that they couldn't fill the prescription.

(she's a well-respected internist and addiction specialist who handles a lot of chronic pain patients, she's furious and organizing a lawsuit against them for patient abandonment and slander, as they falsely claimed she'd had her licensed revoked.)

that was a week ago, and i cannot find any fucking pharmacy that will accept an opioid prescription from someone who isn't a pain specialist, and in fact, many of them refuse to carry opioids at all. i'm trying to get an appointment with a pain specialist, but it's not as if you can stroll into a doctor's office whenever you like. i have no fucking idea how long it will take me to get seen, or if they'll even give me a prescription at all.

daily opioids are the only tether i have to any quality of life whatsoever. i have serious fibromyalgia on top of half a dozen other serious diagnoses, and as a result i am in pain every minute of every day. over the counter medications are a fucking joke at treating this kind of pain, and i cannot get out of bed without pain relief. i can't sleep, i can't shower, i can't cook for myself, i can't do anything but think about the pain.

i understand that for a lot of these pharmacists, the decision is made above their head and there's nothing they can do. but i can't explain the depth of rage i feel towards the pharmacists who condescendingly tell me they're "not comfortable" filling my prescription. it is not your fucking job to decide what medication a person should or shouldn't receive; that's what doctors are for. it is deeply fucking dehumanizing to have to beg complete strangers to care about your quality of life, and have to do so in a calm, polite way so they don't flag you in the system.

i have a few pills left, and i'm stretching them out as far as i can without going into withdrawal or losing my mind completely because i have no idea how long this will last. i'm genuinely looking at drinking as my only available option to cope, which makes me want to fucking scream.

this isn't about what's best for patients, it's not about preventing addiction. it's just about not getting sued, and the corporations don't give a fuck if we end up killing ourselves directly or indirectly as a result.

[burningfaith]

next month me and my grandma are going to visit my godfather who lives in Spain, but instead of being excited (it's gonna be my second time abroad in my life) I'm anxious af, because even though I'm an adult I live with my parents and I need to tell my father about it. normal parents would - y'know - be happy that their children have opportunity to visit another country, but instead he's gonna be insufferable about it, because it's my mom's side of family and he despises my uncle. but what is he gonna do? kick me out of the house even though he promised that as long as I'm studying or working I don't need to worry about such thing, humiliate me as usual, tell me that I'm childish and spoiled or make my mom's life a living hell again? I'm aware of the fact that the longer I'm putting it off the worse his reaction is gonna be, but I'm just not mentally able to tell him that, because I don't know how he will react. I don't need any money from him, I don't have to use my phone during this trip (I dunno how the roaming and stuff work), I just want to be sure he's gonna behave like a proper human being towards my mom and my siblings when I won't be at home and not act like a total asshole while talking with me about it.