#hope she did better

[basslinegrave]

pin-up

b&w originals

[ricky-mortis]

Portrait practice with Miss Holloway :)

[lured-into-wonderland]

So far and to large extent, her interactions with Roberto were the mixture of misunderstanding and mistrust. But as Nunnally was standing there, almost ready to leave, his words were bringing the much needed consolation. The much needed understanding of her situations. Even if it would be completely understandable if he showed none. After all it was Ravein, who Roberto should care about and -- although that was not a welcomed thought -- Nunnally started to be partially aware that she was (or might have been) a threat to Ravein’s (and Roberto’s alike) well-being. Or perhaps even more importantly their safety.

“I understand…” – she said softly – “I have no plans to enforce myself onto Ravein. I am going to give him all the time and all the space he needs.” – she hesitated a bit unsure if her next words would not get misunderstood. Especially that they were neither well-formulated nor well-thought. Rather a feeling, a small work of intuition, a fear? – “I need to remember that I don't know entirely who I am and I don't understand exactly what that can imply…but...but I understand I might be a problem. Not even with what I do, but what I am. Or what I am not. Or what my family is.” – a smile, but not a happy one; rather a smile that she often used to cover how non-confident, how insecure, she was – “I am sorry. I am not sure myself what I am trying to say.”

“And of course Ravein can text me or contact me in any other way he likes. I…I don’t mind. I would appreciate it either way.” – a small laugh – “I actually think we got on pretty well when neither of us was talking too much. But I guess I cannot keep quiet for too long…” – or at least when I should keep my mouth shut. Nunnally promised herself to do better next time. Both with Ravein (if there was next time with him, which she doubted at that very moment) or more general in her life. She should be more careful. Less open. More secretive. Less trusting. And she should be hiding her thoughts and feelings. Was that what her new life was all about? Hiding and pretending?

That very thought made the tears gathered in the corners of her eyes. But she did not want Roberto to see them. She bowed her head: --

“Thank you for everything.” – and left walking home. She knew she could get admonished for her little escapade and she suddenly felt bad about leaving home at night. Without leaving a proper notice. Probably she got the guards in trouble. Or perhaps no-one noticed and she’d be able to return silently into her bed and her bedroom? She did not know but she was to find out soon…

-- [Time Skip] --

Nunnally was sitting on the bench in the park, feeding the swans still contemplating her meetings with Ravein.  As expected he didn't come. Nor contacted her. But perhaps she shouldn't have expected that within a week? That was probably too short time. She had had no issues sneaking in as well. No-one seemed to notice she was missing or perhaps – as she was more willing to assume at that moment – her father had decided to let it slip and give her a chance to do better. No matter what that was she decided to take a chance she was given (she got her lesson after all, didn’t she?) and simply do better.

It was a nice and a bright day. She was wearing a summer flowery dress and a sweater tied around her hips. When the food she brought for the birds finished, she decided to have walk to the nearby café to grab a drink. She was lazily moving around the pond, and then along another park lane that was close to the street just outside the park, when she noticed him. Ravein. He seemed like reading his book and not noticing her. Or at least pretending he did not. She was sure he did. Nunnally had to fight her urge to simply run to him with a cheerful hello. But this time she knew better. Or was it really better? She stood there a bit undecided to what to do, but she was also confident that she should not be drawing any attention to them. So, she simply pretended she got interested in some plant with beautifully blooming flowers. That would let him time to make him decision to approach her or to ignore her. It was now Ravein’s decision. Unfortunately, in a way. As all she could do was waiting.

She took out her phone and made a photo. Putting the phone back to her purse, she had an idea. An idea that might not the smartest, but Nunnally needed to, wanted to show Ravein that she still cared and was waiting for him to…come back? She took the small bunny (that she was now carrying with her rather often) and waved with it towards Ravein's direction. It would be difficult for the outside viewers – she believed – to recognize if she was waving to him or to any other strollers. And then she simply sat on the nearly bench waiting patiently for Raven to make his decisions.

(“Please come.”) – she was thinking but decided to simply accept it if he decided not to…

It certainly was a lot to take in all at once, to which, Roberto could sympathize. It took him quite some time to let the outcome of his cousin to sink in. He vaguely understood that something was going on with his cousin when he had to live in hiding, and he’d assumed that perhaps his family had been on the run, hence the lacking in contact for years on end. Choosing to stay positive, he waited and waited, but no word ever came. It was hard to pinpoint exactly when it became impossible to ever hear from his cousin again, but he could only hope that wherever he was, he was watching over his son along with his wife in heaven.

Though, given what Ravein had gone through, maybe it was better that they weren’t watching over him. Roberto didn’t have any children of his own, but he could only imagine what it would feel like to watch your child suffer because of you needlessly.

Knowing that Nunnally had asked Ravein one of those touchy subject questions, he could understand why Ravein seemed more sensitive tonight, as he was already on edge. “You didn’t know, and it’s understandable that you would be curious about it.” He tries to console her. It was human nature to be curious about things, especially in those around you. He couldn’t deny the fact that if he were in her shoes, he may have asked the same thing. He had the advantage of already having been told what had happened by the young woman that came to find him earlier in the year. It was frightening to know that your cousin and his wife had passed on and that their son was being made to work as an assassin by the Mafia. The emotional and physical scars were evident from the first night he’d seen Ravein.

“Relationships are such that even if it may be difficult if you’ve gotten off on the wrong foot to begin with, but if you continue to try, some good may come of it. Of course, that’s assuming you maintain respectful boundaries.” If the other party didn’t wish to form a connection, persisting would be a further offense. If Ravein chose to not see Nunnally again, it was quite simple for him to avoid her altogether. It was truly up to his mood and his willingness to give another chance that would determine if she’d ever see him again.

Taking the number, he glosses it over. “Ravein is a literal fellow. He’ll take whatever you say to heart, black and white. Can he instead contact via written communication, like texting or email? He’s not much of a talker.” That is, in general. The funny thing being that if you brought up the fact you’d like him to speak verbally, he’d keep that in mind. A truly difficult guy to deal with at times, but he couldn’t fault the young man for how he’d turned out. What socialization did he have when he was younger? What kind of traumas was he fostering? It was hard to blame him for being different.

Despite all that had happened, the fact remained that Roberto and Ravein may not have had the chance to meet if not for Nunnally’s assistance, albeit more of a happenchance than intentional. “Things may not have panned out well tonight, but thank you for helping him that night.” He sees her out the store, and doesn’t go back in until she’s no longer within sight. He cleans up the rest of the store before he goes to check up on Ravein.

-

[Time Skip]

-

After about a week had passed Ravein was outside in his disguise in the park. He didn’t seem to be doing much aside from reading a book, but he’d in fact been keeping an eye on the bustling crowd of people. This part of the park allowed you to see past the park and into the streets. This way, he could see how many people were walking the streets or were taking cars around the town. He was gauging how much mafia activity was going on during the day, and to which famiglia these people belonged. The majority of the people he saw were those that belonged to the old mafia famiglia he was forced to join.

As expected, they were still quite avid about finding him. They’d been going around looking high and low, even going as far as contacting some relatives about his whereabouts. Unfortunately (for them), he didn’t have any real contact with his mother’s side of the family. They had in essence sold her off when the family went bankrupt, and he had suspicions that they’d hand him over as well if the mafia came looking for him. His best bet was staying with the family on his father’s side.

They were low key and there weren’t many of them. He’d never met his grandparents as they had already passed away when his father was young. He lost all contact with his siblings from strained relations. The only one his father kept in somewhat contact with was a distant cousin. Even then they didn’t have direct contact with each other, so the famgilia hadn’t been able to source Roberto yet.

Perhaps it was only a matter of time before they find him and locate Ravein. They were looking to leave the country to start anew elsewhere. Ravein had been waiting for documentation to arrive so he could escape with a different identity. In the daylight hours, he staked out what paths the mafia liked to take in order to formulate the optimal pathing to escape undetected.

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

O my gosh. O my gosh. Ohhhh my gosh. The ratgrinders are sacrificing clerics to bring back a dead god. They killed Lucy. They killed Yolanda. They're probably gonna kill Buddy. Kristen get AWAY please I'm so worried. O my gosh.

[couthbbg]

Bianca Stone, “Artichokes” // x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x

[storge]

The Double (2024)

[folklouire]

You said you were gonna grow up, then you were gonna come find me. Said you were gonna grow up-

Taylor Swift performing Peter at The Eras Tour | Stockholm, Sweden | May 17, 2024 (x)

[dollypopup]

I just need every single person in this fandom who has ever been mean about Luke Newton to know that Nicola Coughlan hates you. Genuinely and wholeheartedly.

She hates you. Sure, she won't say it aloud, because she's a professional who knows her career lives or dies by fans, but please know that she does. She hates you if you've said Colin gave you the ick, especially so if you said it to Luke, she hates you if you've left a rude comment on his social media, she hates you if you acted like she didn't like him or that she was shading him, she hates you if you bullied the people around him, she hates you if you said something disparaging about how he looks or how he acts, she. hates. you.

And sure, it's not all people who are in her or Pen's fanbase, in fact a lot of people have been cruel about him outside of the Polin fandom, but a LOT of people are Pen fans, and hearing her talking about how defensive she gets over him when people say something rude about him? And knowing there are SO many stupid opinion blogs and youtubers and tiktokers who say they're Pen fans and Nicola fans but are mean as fuck about Luke?

I need every single one of them, in particular those who have been out here making up stupid shit to be mad at him about 'on her behalf' to know that when you say something mean about the man she gushed to her Mum about, and who her Mum was so excited to meet because she just knew he was kind, the man she introduced to her entire family, the man she is always reaching for and hugging and snuggling up to and calling wonderful and giggling around and saying how she wouldn't want to do such vulnerable intimate scenes without and complimenting and leaning on and having fun with and calling a special person in her life, she is taking off her earrings and ready to meet you outside in his honor

because she hates you for being a dick about him. hope that clears things up

[theblacktiecacti]

jay went to clown school. let’s talk about that

[oneluckydragon]

"Suddenly the world was gray and dull and my heart was so heavy I felt like I couldn’t move, let alone make it back to Treasure Town. But because of Echo’s last wish… I was able to keep living.”

--- --- --- --- ---

SORA : (Partner)

Abilities: Justified / Inner Focus

Nature: Gentle / Hardy

Moveset: Aura Sphere / Metal Claw / Poison Jab / Dragon Pulse

[natasha-in-space]

Unironically, I think that Saeyoung would enjoy carrying his S/O around in his arms the most out of all mysmes characters. Take a moment to think about it. He knows he's in good physical shape. But nobody else does. He avoids talking about it or showing it off. It's a rather big contrast compared to his other skills and accomplishments he loves bragging about in the chatrooms, even if he often muddies the truth to keep everyone safe from his true identity. And when someone does notice the defined muscle in his arms, he's rather dismissive of it. A strange: 'Oh, yeah, I got some muscle' attitude, before he casually switches the subject. I kind of feel like he has very negative connotations about his own physical strength.

Saeyoung is a protector. It's his best AND he's worst quality simultaneously. As a child, he was too weak to protect Saeran. He used his brain, not his muscle. Now, he's a grown man. A strong, grown man who's probably much more capable of protecting someone physically when push comes to shove. But instead that strength is utilized by him for shady jobs at best, and downright horrible crimes at worst. His strength does no good for him. But he's forced to maintain it nonetheless. To remain alive. In order to protect Saeran, he needs to remain alive. To protect his brother not with his muscle. But with his brain.

Now, imagine this. His perspective on himself changes greatly when you come into his life. You help him believe in himself, to fight for what he thinks is right, to have hope into the bright future where he actually deserves to be happy and free, along with his family. He has viewed himself as nothing but a fraud, a forever tainted fallen angel, but you make him see the good and earnest man inside him that has always been there.

And with you, he can use his muscles for good, for the first time in his life. He can make you smile, squeal, and giggle in delight as he effortlessly sweeps you off your feet and twirls you around, joining you in your fit of laughter. He can help you carry the groceries on the way to his car, such a simple and mundane gesture, but one he finds himself enjoying almost too much. He can make you feel safe as he carries you up to your shared bedroom, since you can just relax and nuzzle into him without any worry in the world.

Because he's got you.

I'm skeptical that Saeyoung will stick to the same workout routine he had to follow while being an informant. Once his father is out of the picture and he knows his family is safe, he can allow himself to relax. Indulge a little. But I do think he'll maintain some of his muscle mass, specifically in his arms. As time passes and you settle into the quiet life of domestic bliss he's always dreamed of, his shape will become more supple and round, but his arms will always be there to remind you that he'll forever be your anchor.

And for him to remember that his strength can now be used to make someone happy.

[dykedvonte]

RE: Your post on the AU of Jimmy being in the cockpit rather than Curly.

I think that Curly would think that Jimmy was reaping what he had sown, but in a way would feel a twisted sense of relief that Jimmy was brought down by his own actions rather than Curly himself having to be the "executioner" in the situation, so to speak.

With "taking responsibility" and the fix-it mentality that he and Jimmy share being the overarching theme, compounded with Jimmy flat out insinuating that all of his crimes on the Tulpar will be "Curly's tragedy" in that one scene, I think Curly would almost find comfort in the irony that the choice was forcibly taken away from him. Which in itself is messed up, but it might be a bit cathartic. There's an interesting polarizing dynamic within Curly's relationship to his own responsibility in that it's his greatest burden and the thing he, too, avoids the most.

I don't think Curly would find any relief in this actually. While Curly didn't/doesn't like the responsibility he had, he defiantly doesn't avoid it, he just goes about it in a weird way.

A thing I noticed is that its less about taking responsibility with Curly and really what that responsibility meant objectively and then subjectively to Curly. The leniency that he applies to Jimmy also applies a bit to the others as well. He thinks his responsibility is more towards keeping the peace and things in order more than dolling out punishment. He has even more choices to make and responsibilities as he literally has to make sure they survive/ration long enough to be saved. Or figure out how to save them himself. The correct issue with Curly and responsibility is the prioritization in his head. He sees the big picture and prioritizes that. He doesn't notice the little things that he should but it's not a active dismissal, perhaps not even conscious despite how dismissive he seemed. He takes too much responsibility, espcially in regards to Jimmy, and I think this situation is when he realizes that is also a bad thing as he can't "fix" all of his wrongs.

I think he'd regret not making a choice, because in the end this happened because he wouldn't directly choose who to comfort and help. He tried to help both and ended up doing nothing for either and letting Jimmy fuck them all over. In this scenario/au he's thinking about all the times he let Jimmy inadvertently make his choice, and how he chose to let it happen. He regrets all of it and would be so bitter that he was giving his choice up for so long. He chose wrong and it affected everyone. The only thing he'd find cathartic is the fucked up truth it will never happen again, not with Jimmy at least.

But he's not happy he's getting joy from that. I think it's a point not a single character other than Jimmy is depicted at deriving joy from another's pain. Even Swansea is being more sarcastic when he cheers on Curly about crashing the ship and ending his sobriety. He's happy Jimmy was forced to take responsibility, but this? He wanted him to learn a lesson and do something with himself, this is hollow in a way it's just embittering. Jimmy didn't get what he wanted, he can be happy about that but no one else did. This isn't justice or closure for Anya, he's stuck in a place he was so desperate to leave with even more pressure on his shoulders. Daisuke is just a kid and Swansea doesn't deserve this after all his year making himself a better man.

Like in his sections, Curly is preoccupied thinking about all the responsibilities he has, taking on things he shouldn't have to and trying to keep the peace when he doesn't have peace in his own mind.

[potatounicoorn]

As if Kuruk being claimed as the worst Avatar in history, while he cleaned up Yanchens mess, dedicating his life to slaying bad spirits while getting no reward but only hatred towards him, losing his wife on the wedding day in progress AND his own life at the early age of THIRTY THREE by literally rotting from spirit powers was not enough suffering for a lifetime. Hah. NooOOOo!

Apparently universe does not want to give this man a fucking break because his "team Avatar" his "best friends", keep being the absolute assholes even after his death AND LITERALLY BETRAY HIM IN HIS NEXT LIFE. AND THEN KEEP MAKING HIS RECARNATION'S LIFE MISERABLE. WHY WAS NOT ONE LIFETIME ENOUGH, WHY??

[muscariii]

G... Guys... It's over for me...

Coloring this thing almost killed me. But I did it and I hope you enjoy it. I'm not really sure where I was going with it but I guess I was just thinking about Nerevar reincarnating or something. I dunno, my head is very empty today.

( you can click for better quality, as usual )

Also a bunch of Rasha doodles, as always. I like to imagine that her feathers/hair gets fluffed up while she sleeps and she wakes up all poofy. For now I'm just trying to get a better understanding of what her personality is -w-

Also also, should I just keep drawing Nerevar? I kinda really enjoy drawing him right now but maybe I should draw someone else like Vivec for example. Suggestions maybe? :3

[littlebittyhollowbugs]

Time to think about how alone the pale king was when he died. He had lost everything. His kingdom yes, but even his closest relationships.

His trusted friends, who became dreamers, gave up their lives and all for a hopeless cause. His wife was driven away by her guilt and her grief. His child who he had learned to love, he sacrificed for nothing.

Almost every character that we know of who had a personal relationship with PK had either been sacrificed or had left him.

And of course all of it was his own doing. (At least largely his own doing.)

Still he sat completely alone in that throne room when he died there.

[dariusaurs]

i think dinostar is such an interesting ship right now even if i've kind of turned away from it after this season. the problem is that it's complicated, and fandoms historically don't like nuanced situations or takes. i don't think it's fair to say darius is putting brooklynn on a pedestal, since from his perspective, she hasn't done anything wrong, and kenji has been framed as this unfair partner to her. it does feel like his feelings are very immature and more of an infatuation right now ("if he loved you half as much.."/"unless?"), especially when you compare them to kenji's own feelings for brooklynn - his girlfriend who he's loved for 6 years - but that isn't a horrible thing, it's just different. i do completely understand if people dislike the ship right now, and even criticize darius' way of handling the accidental confession, but i just think people have been way too harsh on all three of them without being willing to see that all of their perspectives are different