#honestly i should just straight up replay it

[clownowo]

thought about them too hard and exploded. sorry !

[weepingwillowwonder]

My lovelyyyyyyy~! ✨

Because what else do I do throughout the day whilst I’m supposed to be working than come up with silly little scenarios about our boys 🤔 (Whatever makes the day go faster…)

Please could I request AFAB!Reader with Fizzarozzie (of course) - just a vague idea really totally inspired by your latest fic :3c

Reader is up late and wants to play/be entertained but Fizzy is asleep and Ozzie is busy. Can’t seem to stir Fizzy and doesn’t want to bother Ozzie’s work. Cue sulking/trying to cure boredom/getting into mischief/whatever you feel~ Maybe something will grab their attention?

All reader wants is the boys… (relatable 👀)

All we want is the boys... (T_T)

The way it took me a month and a half to actually get this finished is cray cray (In reality I didn't have any ideas until like a week ago but also wrote most of it in the past 24 hours)...Anyway, soooo sorry for the delay, here ya go!

[NSFW UNDER THE CUT 18+ ONLY]

CW: Dom Fizz/Ozzie , Bratty!AFAB!Sub!Reader, Oz refers to himself as daddy once, Dirty talk (honestly just straight filth, no filter), Overstimulation, Masturbatation, Getting caught in the act, Sex toys

---

Sitting up in bed you took note of the clock on the wall. 12:43am. An exaggerated sigh leaves you as you glance to your side, eyeing your partner resting peacefully beside you. As Fizzarolli slept, you watched his chest rise and fall with his breathing, sounds of his soft snores continually filling the silence in the room. You bit your lip in contemplation as you recalled the day's earlier events:

During the mid-afternoon you desperately fought the urge to rest, but after expressing your need for a nap to your partners, you very quickly lost that battle. Ignoring Asmodeus' warning, you decided to follow your body's wishes and went to lay down to sleep for a short time. Fast forward to your present self, you huff in annoyance as Asmodeus' warning came to fruition: ‘'Babydoll, if ya sleep now, you're gonna have trouble when it's actually time to go to bed. And when you can’t sleep, don’t come crying, cuz I’m gonna tell you I told you so...' 

Naturally you grumpily responded that you would sleep just fine at night and that you didn't need someone telling you what to do....Well apparently you did. Your cheeks warm at the thought of being proved wrong and you turn back to the one laying in bed with you. 

"...Fizz..?" You whisper softly, almost afraid of being too loud. "Fizzy..?" Lifting a finger, you lightly give a poke to his shoulder. "Froggyyyy..." You try gently shaking his arm with a pout, but he only groans softly and rolls over away from you. Well this sucks. It's the middle of the night, you can’t seem to get back to sleep, Fizzarolli is out like a light, and Asmodeus is… 

"Wait..." You whisper to yourself, reaching over to check your phone from the nightstand. Under normal circumstances Asmodeus would accompany both you and Fizzarolli in bed, however, you vaguely remembered him mentioning he had a night work meeting and would be up quite late today. With this in mind, you rose from the bed and threw on an oversized sweatshirt to make yourself somewhat decent should anyone else be out and about at this time. Stepping into the hallway, you quietly make your way towards Asmodeus’ office. 

Turning the corner, you feel a slight flutter in your chest when you find his door slightly ajar with a bright light shining into the hallway. As you approach closer and gently knock to announce your presence, you can hear the slight shuffling of paper stop and someone clearing their throat. 

“Yes? Come in.” Asmodeus’ voice is smooth as honey as he invites you in, continuing to read the document in his hands. Suddenly feeling shy, you push open the door and peek your head inside the room, fingers clutching the door frame. For a moment you don’t say anything and neither does he, keeping you in suspense as his words from earlier in the day replay again in your mind. “You’re up late.” He doesn’t look up at you as he comments his observation, but the small smile he gives lets you know he already knows it’s you and why you’re here. 

“So are you.” You retort, maintaining eye contact defiantly when he finally does look up from his paperwork. He leans back in his chair and regards you with a slight tilt of his head. “You do remember our conversation earlier today, right?” He sighs when you stay silent and his elbow comes to rest on the desk, a fist tucked under his chin. “Daddy’s busy baby, you’re gonna have to entertain yourself for a while.” The tone of Asmodeus’ voice leaves no room for negotiation, and you shift uncomfortably under his gaze.

That definitely was not the answer you wanted, nor expected. Sure you made your bed by disregarding his advice today, but you didn’t expect him to actually make you lie in it…Your body language changes quickly, now slightly agitated at the thought of actually having to keep yourself busy. 

“Who said I was looking for you to entertain me? I was merely walking by and thought I would stop in and say hello.” When you roll your eyes, he raises an eyebrow seeing straight through you.

“Says the person who’s found themselves wandering into my office in the middle of the night when they should be asleep.” Asmodeus responds calmly, still smiling towards you, even as your body stiffens by his words. “Now, be good and go keep yourself busy until I’m finished up here. Oh, and when I’m done, we can talk about that little attitude you've got goin’ on.” His smile only widens when he catches the way your legs shift together slightly. “Go on..” His hand waves playfully in a “shoo” motion and you huff as you turn on your heels to leave. 

~

“Be good and keep myself busy, my ass…” you murmur in a mocking voice, shutting the office door a bit harder than you intended. The sound of the door slamming makes you jump and you scurry back towards the way you came in fear of Asmodeus coming out to say something else.  Initially walking back towards the bedroom, you slow down as you pass a familiar room. Seemingly boring on the outside of the door, your cheeks warm at the thought of what’s hidden on the other side. Holding your breath, you take a quick glance down the hallway and slowly turn the knob to enter the room. Quietly you shut the door behind you with a click, turn on the light, and take in the sight in front of you. 

Along the walls there were a variety of objects on display, some of which you had never seen before, many of them phallic in appearance. Your cheeks quickly warm as you step further into the room, admiring the extensive collection of sex related items that were at your personal disposal. It wasn’t as if you weren’t allowed to be in this area of the residence, but you couldn’t recall ever being in there alone in the past. The idea of being there now by yourself made you nervous, fearful of “getting caught” looking through the museum of different toys. But also, a part of you felt…sneaky. Even if there was a chance of someone walking in, that made it all the more enticing. You feel a slight throbbing between your legs as a thought runs through your head. Asmodeus did say to keep yourself busy after all. 

Instead of just browsing, you now find yourself actively looking for the perfect item to keep yourself entertained. It takes some time to find one to your liking, but once you do, you pull it from the display and glance again at the door. Putting your plan in motion, your feet carry you back to the entrance of the room and crack it open slightly, enough so to pique curiosity should anyone walk by. Finding yourself back in the room, you allow yourself to climb onto the plush comforter of the bed and relax, laying back onto the pillows. 

For a moment you do nothing, taking some time to steadily breathe in an attempt at calming your nerves. When you don’t hear anything out in the hallway, your hands slowly trail under your sweatshirt and along your body. You take your time along your chest, slowly groping yourself and brushing over your nipples. A shaky breath leaves your lips and you continue onward, pinching your nipples gently and rolling them between your fingers. Allowing yourself to take your time feeling the sensations, you pull one of your hands away, sliding it down your stomach and thighs only to draw it back up teasing yourself the same way your partners would.

The moan you let out is low and a whisper of both of your partners’ names leaves your lips as you explore your body. You let the pressure build up only touching yourself directly when you feel your frustrations bubbling over. Looking over to the doorway, your soft sounds raise slightly higher when you make direct contact with your clit. Your fingers smooth over the area, making slow tight circles as you touch yourself. Your free hand pinches harder at your nipples, eliciting a sharp gasp from your lips. 

Biting your lip, you do the action again, this time allowing yourself to let out drastically louder sounds of pleasure. While you definitely felt good, you’ll admit, some of your sounds were a bit exaggerated, in hopes of drawing attention to your actions in the room. The more you think of being caught in the act, the more excited you get, fingers moving faster along your clit as you start to get impatient. 

Quickly grabbing the toy, you drag it along your body and down between your legs, feeling the rubber slide against you. This time, the loud whine is genuine, your body automatically arching up to seek friction from it. When you turn on the toy and lead it to your clit, the vibration has your body jerking in response. Feeling both needy and sensitive, you draw it lower, throwing your head back with a whimper when it easily slides over your folds. 

“A-ah please!” You beg into the open room, legs spreading wide as you press the toy against yourself harder. As your eyes slip close in pleasure, you allow yourself to get lost in your touch, only focused on reaching your release. Your free hand reaches lower between your legs to gather some of the wetness growing there and lift it to your lips, moaning as you taste yourself along your fingers, pulling you closer to your finish.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?” Asmodeus’ voice startles you as it echoes in the room. Your fingers fly out of your mouth and you sit up, closing your legs in an attempt to make yourself less exposed. 

“I-I wasn’t-,” your voice is small when you stammer out an excuse, eyes wide in embarrassment. You spot a grinning Fizzarolli peeking his head around the corner and both of them approach the bed after closing the door. 

“You weren’t what? Playing with your needy little pussy?” Asmodeus grins down at you, taking in every bit of your flustered expression. “Was this your plan all along? To get me riled up so I would come find you in here? You naughty thing~” Asmodeus lifts your chin in his hand as you try to avoid his gaze, feeling the bed shift as Fizzarolli crawls onto it. “Imagine my surprise when Froggy comes into my office after waking up without you and all we can hear are your sweet, sweet sounds coming from our sex dungeon.” Asmodeus purrs out his accusations, distracting you briefly. 

“Oh, what’s this?~” Fizzarolli gruff voice comments, quickly grabbing the forgotten toy and suddenly pressing against your core when his arms wrap around your midsection. With a click, the vibrations start back up, and you immediately start wiggling in the arms around you, yet you’re only able to stay in that position with both sets of hands keeping you in place. Your mouth opens in a silent moan as the overwhelming pleasure shocks your system, your clit being tortured by the strong vibrations of the toy. 

“W-what, no?!” You breathe out as the toy moves against you, almost too much at once but also rapidly bringing you to the edge. “Fuuuuck Fizz, I can’t! You’re gonna make me-!” You exclaim in a high pitched gasp.

“Gonna make you what? Huh? You gonna cum for us?” He coos, continuing to press the toy hard against you, even as you try to jerk away from him. “Do you think you deserve it…?” He whispers in your ear mockingly, nibbling along your neck with a groan. Asmodeus grip tightens on your chin, fingers now squeezing your cheeks as both a sob and a garbled ‘yes!’ comes from your lips. “I dunnoooo, Oz told me you had a real bad attitude earlier. Talking back, slamming doors, and now this…” He trails off, wiggling the toy slightly to change its positioning against you. 

The white hot pleasure of where the toy was now nestled against you almost has your eyes rolling back in your head. An apology flies from your lips, as you teeter the line of your orgasm, trying to look up at Asmodeus with pleading eyes. He leans down to ghost his lips against yours with a teasing grin and a whisper.

“And what if I said no, hm? That you didn’t deserve it?” Your brain doesn't process his words immediately, taken aback by Fizzarolli’s commentary and him grinding his hips into your ass from behind you. 

“Fuck Oz, you’re so mean~” He snickers, when he realizes you’ve caught on, tears now coming down your face. 

“Please Ozzie, please! I need it, need you! Tell me I can, I c-can’t!” You’re so far gone, voice cracking as you beg him to finish. He gives you some more time to feel the weight of his lack of response before responding right before enveloping his lips with yours.

‘Let go for us.’ Your mouth automatically opens submissively and allows him to take control of the kiss as your orgasm suddenly crashes through you. He rewards you by exploring your mouth in the kiss, groaning softly and holding you steady as your body  tenses and trembles from your release. The three of you can hardly comprehend the words leaving your mouth, as it sounded more like a mixture of sounds rather than actual words. 

“Fiiiizz! Fizzy, no please..!” A loud sob leaves your throat as Asmodeus pulls away, his hand reaching down to unbutton his down pants. Fizzarolli’s free hand grips your hip steady as you buck violently against his hold, keeping the toy firmly against you. He continues onward, even when you’re begging him to stop and only lets up when he sees your release dripping down your legs onto the sheets below 

“Oh honey,” Asmodeus pulls his cock from his pants, grinning wolfishly as Fizzarolli whistles behind you. “I hope you know we’re just getting started~”

[band--psycho]

Harvey Specter x Reader - Fight (Part 2)

Just want to say a huge thank you to everyone who read Part 1 of this story!

Please be kind, reblogs are always welcome and greatly appreciated!

Thank you all for the continued support! I hope you all enjoy this! 💛

Requests are open so if you have any ideas/requests, you're more than welcome to send them over.

I do not give permission for any of my works to be copied or translated onto this site or other platforms!

Masterlist / Harvey Specter Masterlist / Join My Taglist

Y/n was angry. 

Angry and hurt. 

She clenched and unclenched her fists continuously for a few moments when she was finally out of the building; Harvey’s words still replaying through her mind.

She knew Harvey was going through a stressful time; but what right did that give him to say those things to her? 

Especially when Harvey himself was the very reason that she didn’t work at his firm…

She stood there outside the office, in the middle of the night, the chill in the air cooling down her heated cheeks, as she tried to work out where she could go. 

Home? 

Back into the office to confront him about what he’d said?

Neither of those options seemed like a good idea right now, not whilst she was this angry. 

Although she was angry and had every right to be, she still loved Harvey, that didn’t just stop because of what he’d said….but returning to his office now after what’d just happened just seemed like a bad idea. 

It wouldn’t help anyone, it would probably just make both hers and Harveys anger’s spiral into another argument. 

No, she needed an outlet for the rage she was feeling. 

Part of her just wanted to go home, have a shower and go straight to bed and try to forget the words that were said.

But she knew sleep would not come easily to her, it rarely did after an argument with anyone, let alone Harvey. 

And his words would just continue to race around in her mind fuelling her own anger. 

She needed a distraction. 

An outlet for her anger.

That’s why she went to the gym. 

The gym wasn’t somewhere Y/n went often, after work she was normally too tired to go or her and Harvey would have plans, so the gym was never a top priority. 

She’d gone with Harvey on the odd occasion when she needed to let off some steam during or after a case; but never on her own. 

But she knew that Harvey probably wasn’t going to be coming out of his office any time soon, so that meant that she’d at least get some time to expel the anger inside of her, uninterrupted.

So she called a cab. 

The cab took her to her and Harvey’s shared apartment first, allowing Y/n the time to quickly change and to dump her work stuff on the sofa, before heading back to the cab and going straight to the gym. 

~~~~~~~~

Harvey was pissed off, more at himself than anyone else.

He hated seeing her hurt, and he certainly hated being the reason why she was hurt. 

He’d allowed his arrogance, rage, stress and exhaustion to blend together and cloud his mind. 

He knew he’d upset pretty much everyone over the course of this case, the one person he hadn’t, was Y/n, and now he’d alienated her as well. 

He knew she’d be angry, and she should be; in all honestly he was surprised she didn’t slap him for what he said.

He deserved it. 

He wanted to call her, he’d got as far as picking up his phone and having his thumb hover over the green call button next to her name. 

He wanted to apologize for what he’d said and how he’d been acting for the past few weeks. 

But an apology was just words; they weren’t going to heal the wound he knew his words had made. 

He knew she’d need some space and some time, so that’s what he was going to give her. 

He sat in his office for a while, trying to figure out what to do with the rest of his evening. 

He assumed she’d be at home so didn’t want to disturb her.

He contemplated calling his client and telling him to find another lawyer, but that could wait until morning. 

What Harvey needed was to calm down, not get more agitated; and he knew calling his client would make him more agitated instead of calm. 

Everyone else at the firm that he’d pissed off would be asleep by now and as much as he was sure they’d answer him if he called, he didn’t want to talk to them, not right now. 

Unfortunately he’d just alienated the only person that he did want to talk to. 

A long sigh left his lips as he rose to his feet, quickly putting on his suit jacket before heading towards the lift.

He didn’t know where he was going. 

All he did know was that he just needed to get out of the office; even if it was just for a short while; then he’d come back, and try to get some sleep before dropping his asshole of a client. 

~~~~~~

Y/n had her music blasting through her over the ear headphones at the highest possible volume she could have. 

It blocked out the noise from the few other people that were in the gym and allowed her to be completely focused on hitting the punching bag in front of her as many times as she physically could, in time to the beat of her music. 

She’d forgotten how good it felt to get her anger out like this, so often she just let it fester away inside of her until she broke down in tears from it. 

Her mind kept wandering to Harvey, no matter how many times she pushed the thought of him away he kept appearing in her mind. 

After five more intense minutes of punching the still bag before her; she stopped, feeling the exhaustion from releasing her anger slowly creeping in. 

As she sat down on the bench beside her to drink some water, she took her headphones out and allowed her eyes to drift to the clock hanging in the center of the gym. 

It was 1:30am.

She needed to go to bed soon, she knew she did, she could feel how drained not only her body was but her mind also. 

But despite her physical and mental fatigue, the words Harvey had spoken earlier in the evening were still running rampant in her mind, fuelling her anger.

A sigh fell from her lips as she rose to her feet, and went back to the punching bag she’d been standing at for the last hour.

The silence that surrounded her would normally be something that she hated, that’s why she’d been listening to her music so loudly, in an attempt to drown out the world around her and the words echoing in her mind; but hadn’t seemed to work, so she thought she’d try something different and embrace the silence around her. 

She thought about Harvey words; and with every thought she punched the bag in front of her, over and over again. 

She was focused in her own world, that she hadn’t realized she was no longer alone. 

That was until she heard a voice come from behind her saying, “Should I ask who’s face your imagining on that bag?”

The voice made her freeze on the spot and grit her teeth as she attempted to catch her breath. 

Harvey. 

Harvey was here. 

For a split second she contemplated turning around and using him as the punching bag instead, but she knew that would be wrong. 

And she didn’t want to hurt Harvey, no matter how much he’d hurt her with his words.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, her voice clearly displaying her anger and hurt.

“I didn’t know you were here,” Harvey explained honestly and calmly; his voice was a lot softer than when she’d last spoken to him. 

“I’m going to drop the client,” he continued, taking a step closer towards her but also being very aware that she probably didn’t want him too close to her right now, “You were right, I shouldn’t have been snapping at anyone, least of all you, I know you were only trying to help.”

Y/n didn’t say anything for a short while, allowing his words to sink in; she was happy he was dropping his client, it was about time. 

But it didn’t fix what had happened.

And neither did Harvey admitting that he was wrong, or realising that she was only trying to help. 

It didn’t erase what he’d said; nor the pain that it caused her. 

She was a good lawyer, a very good lawyer, and she could’ve gotten a job at his Pearson Hardman, Jessica Pearson had said so herself.

But there was just one problem.

The fact that Y/n was dating Harvey. 

That was why she couldn’t be hired there. 

And Harvey knew that. 

And although he’d offered to argue it with Jessica, Y/n didn’t want that. 

“What I said, about me being a better lawyer than you…I didn’t meant it…I was just…”

His words trailed off as his eyes met Y/ns as she slowly turned her head to look at him. 

“Angry?” She finished coldly, taking her gloves off and throwing them on the bench to her side. 

“You had no right to throw that in my face,” 

Harvey hadn’t thought he could feel anymore remorse and guilt for what he’d said, but then he saw the pain that was still lingering in her eyes and heard the way her voice broke towards the end of her sentence from the tears she was trying to hold back.

He wanted to reach out to her. 

To hold her.

To comfort her. 

In an ideal world, he’d have a Time Machine and he’d take those words back, but that couldn’t happen. 

“Y/n, I am sorry,” he apologised, tentatively taking another step closer to her, “It doesn’t excuse what I said, and I don’t expect you to just suddenly be okay, but I am sorry.”

She watched him, ready to pull away from any attempt of comfort he tried to give her, but thankfully Harvey didn’t come any closer to her, allowing her her space. 

She fought with herself mentally about what to say to him, or whether the best course of action was to just remain silent. 

He was her boyfriend; and she knew how much stress he’d been under. But that didn’t mean that his actions to her and everyone else in the office was acceptable.

He’d been a dick. 

And she couldn’t just forgive him like what he’d said was something small.

It was an attack on her career. 

On the job she’d worked so hard for. 

And he was going to have to do a lot more than just apologise for what he’d said.

That being said….despite all her fury towards him, she still loved him. 

Y/n took a deep breath, calming her beating heart down a little.

“I appreciate your apology, Harvey,” and she did, she knew saying ‘sorry’ wasn’t something Harvey did often so the fact that he was doing it meant a lot to her, “but it doesn’t mean I forgive you,”

“I know,” he acknowledged, trying to hide how heartbroken he was, his mind instantly going to the worst case scenario. 

That they were over. 

“I can stay at the office tonight, and start moving some of my things out during the day whilst you’re at work,” Harvey explained simply, making sure that he didn’t let any emotion show in his voice. 

This was his fault.

He knew that. 

He’d hurt her with what he’d said and it wasn’t okay. 

“What?” Y/n questioned, confusion clear in her voice.

It wasn’t until a few more moments had passed that she’d realised what he was talking about.

“Harvey I’m not breaking up with you,” she stated, taking a few steps towards him, tentatively reaching out to take ahold of his hand. 

“I love you; and yes what you said hurt me and it’ll take time for me to move on from it, but I’m not going to leave you because of it.”

She knew it was because he was stressed and overworked; there wasn’t a person in the world who hadn’t snapped at someone close to them when they were completely exhausted, and although she was still hurt; she also knew that people made mistakes.

And that even Harvey Specter wasn’t perfect.

Relief washed over Harvey as her words sunk in, he’d been so used to people leaving, that he couldn’t help but think that that’s what she was going to do. 

“I love you too,” he said, squeezing her hand softly as his eyes met hers once again, “I really am sorry, baby,” 

“I know,” she replied softly, “and I’ll move on from it, I just need some time,”

“Okay,” he nodded; he’d give her anything she wanted if it meant he didn’t lose her. 

“I think we should go home,” Y/n said, looking at the clock just above Harvey's head; it was close to 2am and she knew that they both needed to sleep. 

‘We should go home’ those words were enough to ease Harvey’s anxious heart. 

“Sounds like a good idea,” he smiled sleepily, and with that the two of them left the gym, their hands intertwined in one anothers. 

Harvey couldn’t believe how lucky he was to not have lost her because of his behaviour; most people wouldn’t give him a second chance, but Y/n did. 

And he wasn’t going to waste it. 

Taglist:

@enjoymyloves @furiouscopshepherduniversity @laurzwrites @rosedpetal @nilly-021 @gublerstylesobrien1238 @reidmymind00 @pear-1206 @beatricee24 @shit-lips @bluebreadenthusiast @little-diable @wild-rose-35 @withmyteeth @theestorm @malfoys-demigod @nd264 @taintedstranger @travelersinister @ttyna5user @v4mp74u @mayans-mc @queenanababy

[crunchystarz]

Runs and trips and falls

(out of breath) may I please request hurt comfort with Idia (gender neutral reader) it doesn't matter what I'm a poor orphaned boy who must be fed

"only you"

Idia Shroud x GN!reader| oneshot

Summary- Idia seems to be avoiding you and you don't know why.

Cw- hurt/comfort, poor communication, Idia is bad with feelings, reader is yuu

Word count: 1622

A/N: we are so back chat, hope you enjoy!

School was taking a huge toll on you. At one point you were just a regular college student, until you were transported to a completely different world. By some “luck” you still had to do school work. However everything was slightly altered here.

Going to Night Naven College was like being a black sheep among a herd of white sheep. Everyone knew what they were doing. You on the other hand were still trying to catch-up. You had no magic and little knowledge of anything that this world had to offer.

On top of that you were living in a run down dorm with just enough money to survive. To say you were tired was an understatement. However there was one light in your life that kept you going.

Idia Shroud. He was socially anxious, shut in who with no doubt could be a little rude sometimes was your best friend. You'd often spend your time at Ignihyde. You'd listen to the guy rant about some game he was playing or other times you two would just sit in a comfortable silence.

You don't know why but being around Idia calmed your mind. If you could describe him he'd be like the eye of a hurricane. The one safe and peaceful point. He was an anchor to you; he grounded you in this unfamiliar place.

You couldn't explain truly he just made you feel…human.

So when he started to ignore you. It hurt…real bad. He'd not pick up or return your calls at first. Not out of the ordinary he sometimes did that. He'd not reply to your texts, even after you clearly saw that he received your message. It honestly made you anxious.

Maybe you were reading way too much into it. That was until you were at a meeting that for some reason required you to be involved.

You smiled when you saw the familiar blue flames of hair. When you went to go talk to him however he just walked away. It shattered your heart in a way you couldn't understand.

He was ignoring you. And it stung so fucking bad. Your safe place was…ignoring you.

Soon that became the only thing you could think about. What could you have done to upset him? Did your usual teasing actually get him mad or upset bim? Did he hate you? You didn't know and it was driving you crazy.

You couldn't find a reason for Idia to just flat out start avoiding you. Seriously, what could you have done? Over time he stopped reading your messages all together.

It felt like a knife straight through your heart. Eventually you just focused on school, letting the work consume you. While you had other friends, yes , they didn't have the same bond you and Idia shared.

You tried to ignore the aching in your heart. The way you'd feel so empty when he wasn't around. It was weird. Felt so odd to not have him talk to you about some new niche anime or have him rest in your lap while you watched him play a game.

Those were moments you cherished. And you'd replay those memories over and over trying to search for where you screwed up , for why he'd start to distance himself

—

You groaned, you didn't know what you were doing. Maybe it's just your sleep deprived brain that dragged you here. You should turn back. But just as you decided of course you were stopped by a hand gripping into your uniform.

“[Name] what a wonderful surprise!” A voice chirped.

Your eyes widened before you turned the other way. “ Hi Ortho, I was actually about to get going sorry” you spoke, patting his head.

“Oh but, it's been so long since I've seen you! I'm sure my brother feels the same way why don't you come In please “

“Ortho wait..” Ah who were you kidding you couldn't resist the way his eyes looked so sad. You let him pull you along even if your insides are screaming to go the other way. Yet that small part of you went along because you missed being there.

“w-what are you doing here?” Squeaked a familiar voice.Your heart basically stopped actually seeing Idia. Your mouth felt dry and your legs started to shake. You didn't know why.

You didn't even realize tears started to fall down your cheeks.

Idia’s golden eyes widened in panic as he saw the tears streaming down your face. He froze, his nervous fidgeting intensifying as his hands gripped the edges of his hoodie like a lifeline. His blue flames flickered.

“I'm sorry— I just” you hiccuped. Embarrassed, you tried to wipe away your tears but they just kept falling.

“W-why the heck are you crying?” he stammered, his voice rising slightly in pitch. His gaze darted everywhere. You couldn't help but cry harder at his words. He awkwardly moved closer to you.

You didn't clock the fact you yourself were moving closer before you latched yourself into his body in a hug. Burying your face into his chest while you continued to sob uncontrollably.

The weight of every stressful event that has happened up until this point finally got to you, just seeing Idia was the tipping point. You were so exhausted truly. You sniffled into his hoodie as he awkwardly wrapped an arm around you. As if you were a fragile piece of glass and if he handled you wrong you'd shatter.

You pulled away enough to look Idia in his eyes, his yellow ones looked concerned and conflicted. “Why- have” you paused for a moment. “Why have you been ignoring me…” your voice cracked and it almost came out like a broken whisper.

“I- uh I… “ The house warden started. His mouth opened and closed but words never left him. He ran a hand through his hair struggling to come up with the right words.

His frown deepened when you started to cry a bit harder, hesitant he went to reach out for you. You let him pull you close to him again.

“Look It's not…you. It's just I thought it would be better if I just…” he mumbled eyes farting everywhere but your form. Your grip on his hoodie tightened.

“Why would that be better, why would ignoring me be better;,do you know how much that hurt me?” You choked. Idia cringed and just sighed. Guilt flashing across his face.

“I know …I know. I hurt you and I'm really really sorry I just…” words seemed to be caught in his throat. He couldn't explain how he felt to you. It was so nerve-wracking and he'd only make things worse. He hurt you, but you deserved to know.

He mumbled something under his breath , something you couldn't make out.

“What was that?”

“I like like you okay, like I want you to be part of my party way, like if we were in a dating sim your hearts would be maxed out time of like— and I just thought I'd never stand a chance and that you deserve someone who isn't so…me, that it would be better if you just would forget about me” He stammered out, pink creeping into his pale cheeks.

You were stunned and for a moment you could just stare at him. He flinched and looked away at your gaze.

“It just thought it would be easier…” he muttered just above a whisper. His golden eyes finally met you when you started to laugh through your tears.

“Idia you idiot! Why would I care about that?” You giggled breathlessly, wiping away your tears and you let out a sigh of relief.

“Well you're just so amazing [Name]! I'm some shut in who can't properly socialize, I'd mess everything up if I -”

Idia’s brain short-circuited when you cut him off by pulling him into a kiss. His hair flashed pink as your soft lips met his blue ones. He didn't know how to react. He could have died right there.

“I like you too you dummy, and I wouldn't have it any other way so…please don't shut me out again “ You said looking him in the eyes, your voice getting quieter at the last few words.

The house warden brought a hand to his lips and nodded. A small smile tugged at your lips and you couldn't help the small laugh that left your throat at his flustered state.

“But…”

“No buts, I don't want any ‘better’ I want you Idia, nothing is going to change that” you spoke softly, hands picking up his own. He opened his mouth but immediately shut it, not trusting himself enough for the right words to leave his mouth.

“Okay…I-I'm sorry for being a coward…” he mumbled the apology. You just smiled and shook your head. Sighing you leaned into him more and rested your head on his chest again.

Slender arms wrapped around you tightly, Idia rested his head on yours as well. You two stayed silent just matching one anothers breathing taking in each other. You were where you belonged. Your safe place. Your anchor.

“I love you” you whispered, but you made sure he could hear. The blush across his face became redder, embarrassed he buried his face in your hair. After a moment he had enough courage to respond.

“I…love you too…could you…kiss me again “ he spoke meekly. You giggled and cupped his face in your hands before pulling him into another kiss. This onez more soft and meaningful. The house warden basically melted in your touch.

“You're so cute, you know that” You teased, pulling away never letting go of his face. His hands rested on yours as his eyes looked around too embarrassed to meet your face.

“You're going to kill me…

MASTERLIST

[mattsfavouritewhore]

Why Her? Part 2 - Mathew Sturniolo

a/n: I heard ya'll loud and clear!!! Here's a part 2. I also know you guys want part 2 of Just Go so that will be out soon too! I got you guys dw!!

Warnings: Swearing, arguing, angst, fluff, tension.

Summary: You and matt decided one last time you'd fuck, but now it seems you miss it... and he does too.

Part 1: why her

It's been a few months since you last saw or even spoke to matt. That didn't stop you from keeping up to date with this life. Recently him and Maria made it public on the internet and safe to say.. the fans weren't having it. It's not because he's taken, it's because they've all noticed the behaviour nick and Chris have been trying desperately to open matt's eyes too.

Currently, you're at home getting ready for the gym when you get a knock on the door. "Matt?" You open the door and he stands there anxiously awaiting your presence. "Oh uh hey.." He doesn't even look like he wants to be here. "Why are you here." You don't hide your cold heartedness. Memories from that night replay in your head, "One more time" "Never again". It hits you like a ton of bricks.

"I umm can i come in?" "does your gf know you're here?" He scoffs and roles his eyes before pushing past you into your house. "We need to talk." "About what" he's silent for a moment. "That night." Your heart starts beating faster and your hands become sweaty, suddenly you feel like you've already been to the gym and ran 10 miles on top of that. "Why."

He starts walking closer. "It meant more to me, YOU mean more to me." Your walls immediately go up. "No. no. you have a gf and you chose her." He grabs your wrist. "Please." "Matt no. You JUST announced her to your fans. Theres nothing to say. Im not staying secret, i'm not fucking you because she cant fulfil your needs. If you want me you pick me."

You can see he's starting to get angry. "You were all i wanted. And you couldn't see it." "How was i supposed to see it matt?! I was too busy wondering if you actually wanted me in that way! you need to be real with yourself and me and stop pussying around!" All of a sudden you were up against the wall, his lips too close for comfort, his arms barricading you in. "You want me to be straight up?! Its you. It always was and it always will be. I tried to move on, yet every night i wish i was wrapping my arms around you. Every dream i have is with you. every time i put my dick inside her i wish it was you. Because i am in love with you."

You stare at him, not knowing if you should say something or kiss him but before you say anything he kisses you, you kiss him back with no hesitation. "I need you. This isn't just a fuck for me. You are the girl i want, the one i need" "You know that i want you the same. But i can't sneak around like this matt. It's me or her." you pray that he chooses you. "Then give me a month. She'll be gone by then. If not, you never have to give me a chance again.. i should go."

He walks out without saying anything. Lets pray she's gone by the end of next month.

A/N: I know this isn't the part 2 you wanted and its short BUT i've been trying to think of what to write for the last couple days and i don't want to overdo smut, sooooo if you guys want a part 3.. i'll definitely make it more smut filled yet have a storyline towards a conclusion, and honestly depending on how well this story does i may turn it into a wattpad story (if anyone even uses wattpad anymore) lmkkkkk

[blueshirtjamie]

"Slut!" // J. Hughes

In which Jack and the reader decide to go public with their blossoming relationship, only to discover that the internet can be a cruel place. Is all of it really worth it? (Inspired by the masterpiece of a vault track Taylor gave us.)

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, insults (the title is slut after all), not proofread so please pardon any small errors!

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: I honestly don't know Jack's personality very well so hopefully I did an okay job of characterizing him. I hope you enjoy this! My requests are always open :)

_____________________________________________

Everyone wants him, that was my crime

You had been dating New Jersey’s star young forward, Jack Hughes, for some time now– but it was a complete secret. Jack was one of the NHL’s biggest names because of his insane talent on the ice. And, much to your chagrin, he was also one of the most crushed-on players in the league. His ocean-blue eyes and sweet smile charmed anyone who laid eyes on him, and you were so afraid of what people would say if they found out that you two were an item. New Jersey Devils fans, and Jack Hughes fans in particular, were nothing if not protective and could be so mean online. You liked Jack a lot–you two had so much fun together, always laughing and doing fun things, and you didn’t want the world to break you two apart. You were afraid to share Jack, something you had shared with him from the start of your relationship. The Tweets, Tumblr posts, and Instagram accounts dedicated to your boy ignited a jealous and protective streak in you, but it was the price you’d have to pay to stay with Jack– and one you’d pay willingly. 

Aquamarine, moonlit swimmin' pool// What if all I need is you?

“I think we should go public soon, babe,” Jack said one night as you two were taking a late-night dip in your backyard pool. You swam over to him and put your arms around his neck, planting a small kiss on his lips. 

“ I don’t know, Jack,” you said. “I’m just so scared of what people will say. What if all I need is you? No one else’s opinions and validation, just my boy?” You gave him a small smile. 

“I know you’re scared, baby,” he replied. “But I want to show you off to the world. Everyone deserves to see my pretty girl and learn all about you and your kind heart.”

You blushed, and a sigh escaped you. 

“Okay,” you conceded. “If you’re sure, J, then I trust you.” 

Jack smiled, pulling you in for a long, slow kiss. The kind that made your stomach flutter and your heart melt. 

Got love-struck, went straight to my head// Got lovesick all over my bed

The moonlit swim replayed in your head as you two lay in bed that night. Jack had been sound asleep next to you, softly snoring, for a while now. You, on the other hand, were wide awake, your mind racing. “I want to show you off to the world,” you heard on loop. The sweet facial expression Jack gave you as you said it. The soft kiss that had quickly heated up. God, you loved kissing Jack, and with each kiss, you felt yourself falling deeper and deeper for him. Each sweet word from his pretty lips intensified your feelings. There was no denying it— you were falling in love with Jack Hughes, and he was right. It was time for the world to finally know. 

The next morning, you sat next to Jack in bed as he scrolled through photos of you guys, trying to find the perfect few to post on his Instagram. Finally, you settled on three– a shot of you two post-game, one with the city skyline in the background, and a selfie of you kissing his cheek. Your heart pounded as Jack typed out the caption: “my whole heart ❤️”. He pressed “post” and you took a deep breath. 

“I could throw up,” you said, curling into Jack’s side. He held you close, placing a gentle kiss on your head. 

“Everyone is gonna love you, babe, I don’t know how they couldn’t.” 

And I break down, then he's pullin' me in// In a world of boys, he's a gentleman

As it turns out, the internet was a cruel place, and not everyone loved you. While the comments on Jack’s post were mostly positive, especially the ones from teammates and other players, others were not so nice. The words “slut”, “puck bunny”, “clout chaser”, and “bitch” floated around a lot, and so you found yourself doom scrolling through social media, reading every comment you could find. Your photos were reposted time and time again on various accounts, and it was overwhelming. Tears welled in your eyes and you tried hard to hold them back, but you were unsuccessful. Once they started falling, they just wouldn’t stop. Jack walked around the corner into your bedroom to find you a sobbing mess. He took your phone from your hands, powered it off, and took both of your hands in his. 

“We’re done with that for today, okay?” he said gently. He pulled back the covers on your bed and helped you get in before getting in himself, pulling your body into his. 

“They’re being so mean, Jack,” you said between sobs. “I knew it was a bad idea, I knew it!” 

Jack shushed you gently, wiping your tears with his thumb. 

“Those people don’t matter, love. What matters is that you’re mine, and I’m going to protect you like my life depends on it. You and me, that’s all that matters, okay?”

You nodded as a sob racked through your body. Jack held you like that, whispering reassurances and stroking your hair until you calmed down, your breathing becoming more even and your cries fading out. He handed you a box of tissues from the nightstand and smiled at you as you dabbed at your eyes and blew your nose. 

“I’m sorry baby,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. 

Jack cupped your face with both of his hands, looking you in your eyes. 

“Hey, there’s nothing to apologize for, baby,” he said. “At some point, you get used to any kind of comments about you and block them out. I forgot that not everyone can ignore it like I’ve learned to. I’m gonna protect you, okay? I mean it. I will tell you time and time again how amazing you are, and I’ll make sure they know it too.” He kissed you gently, and you melted into him. 

I said, "It might blow up in your pretty face"// I'm not sayin', "Do it anyway"// But you're going to

After an afternoon spent snuggling up to Jack and watching movies, you were calm, and the comments had drifted from your mind. Let them talk, you thought. As long as I have my boy, that’s all that matters. 

“Let’s go out tonight,” Jack said, looking at you, his face lit up in excitement. 

“Jack…” you started, an air of uncertainty in your voice. 

“No, I mean it. Let’s go out and be seen, show people that their comments don’t matter in the slightest. Let’s go have fun and get your mind off things, ya know?”

You sighed deeply, contemplating. You could dress up, go out, and have some fun with your boy, or you could stay in bed and sulk. Okay, you thought. Let’s do this. 

“Okay,” you said, looking at Jack and smiling. “But if it blows up in your pretty face, don’t say I didn’t warn you, babe.”

His elation visibly grew as his smile widened. 

“Okay!” He said, placing a gentle kiss on your lips. “Let’s get ready, then.”

But if I’m all dressed up, they might as well be lookin' at us// And if they call me a slut, you know it might be worth it for once// And if I'm gonna be drunk, I might as well be drunk in love

So there you were, dressed in a sexy little black dress that hugged your curves and showed off your best assets, your hair and makeup done up. You felt confident, you felt strong, you felt… hot. Jack agreed, whistling at you as you rounded the corner and stepped into his view. 

“Wow, babe,” he said, taking you in. “You are absolutely stunning. I can’t wait to show my girl off,” he smiled, taking your hand and spinning you in a small circle. He pulled you in then, both his hands on your waist, and gave you a long, slow kiss. You melted into him and deepened the kiss. After pulling away, you took in the sight of Jack. Black pants and blazer paired with a crisp white button-down and black tie, hair mussed up in just the right way that you loved on him. 

“You’re not so bad yourself,” you smiled, meeting his eyes with your own. He smiled back, that charming, bright smile that gave you butterflies every time. 

“Ready to go?” he asked. You nodded confidently. 

“We look so good,” you said. “They might as well be looking at us, right?” 

Jack laughed. “That’s my girl.”

The bar was busy on a Friday night, as was expected, so you two were able to grab a drink inconspicuously, blending into the crowd. Jack kept a hand around your waist the entire time, gently guiding you through the sea of people drinking, mingling, and dancing. You two found a table to stand at and people-watched, chatting and laughing together. It felt good to be out, to be dressed up, to feel confident. Your conversation was soon interrupted by a man, clearly already a few drinks in.

“Oh my god,” he shouted over the music. “Jack Hughes!” 

He clapped a firm hand on Jack’s back. 

“Can I take a picture with you?” he asked, more as a warning, as his phone quickly obscured Jack’s face as he leaned in for a selfie. 

Just as soon as he arrived, he was gone. 

“So it begins,” Jack said, a tone of annoyance in his voice. “I bet that picture is already on Twitter.” 

He took his phone out to check social media, and you leaned close to him, peering over his shoulder. He placed a hand on your lower back, scrolling through his mentions with the other hand. Sure enough– a grainy, dimly lit photo of you two in candid conversation had been posted by a hockey “news” account. 

Jack Hughes spotted with his new girlfriend at a Newark bar! (via @jacklukequinn)

Somehow, this didn’t bother you at all. If you were gonna dress up, they should be looking at you. You two were a hot couple, and the world deserved to see. If they called you a slut, or a puck bunny, or a clout chaser, so what? It was worth it. You had Jack– what they all wanted– so it was worth it. You had the boy who melted your heart with his charming smile, made you feel beautiful with his kind compliments, and kissed you like no one else ever had. If you were gonna get drunk, you might as well be drunk in love, too. You took Jack’s hand, looking him in his eyes. 

“Come on baby, I wanna dance,” you said, a smile creeping onto your face. 

Takin’ your time in the tangerine neon light, this is luxury// You're not sayin' you're in love with me// But you're goin' to

You led Jack to the dance floor, throwing your arms around his neck as he placed his hands on your hips. You swayed them to the beat, moving as close to him as you could be. The world around you faded– the words, the people, the thoughts, the insecurity, all fading away as you danced and the alcohol set in. It was just you and Jack, the neon lights of the bar casting his face in a tangerine glow. He looked at you lovingly, his eyes soft and his smile sweet. You laughed, pulling him close to place a kiss on his delicious lips. This, this right here was all you needed. All that mattered. Just you and Jack, falling in love. If they called you a slut, it truly might be worth it for once.

[consistencynevermether]

Ice cold: Astarion x reader

content: ascended Astarion x gn tav, angst, tav is goin through it in this one yall, i give karlach a more hopeful ending in the background bc i just want her to be happy, karlach and tav besties agenda, sfw, cannon typical violence

summary: after breaking it off with ascended Astarion, you meet again at a winter ball

word count: 6k (apparently i cant shut up about this man)

a/n: man i gotta write more happy Astarion content fr i keep putting this man in situations.

How many years had it been since you’d seen Astarion? 3? 5? Maybe more? You try to remember what your last moments with him were like before you decided to break things off. It was definitely after he ascended, but was it before you had gotten rid of the tadpole, or after? Honestly, after a while things had started to blur together really. After so many years, only the painful parts remained clear in your memory. How you, with tears in your eyes, had told him you couldn’t do this anymore. And the look of condescending and uncaring as he stared back. It had shattered you into a million pieces to end things with Astarion, but it would have hurt even more if you had stayed. Whoever he had become after he ascended, it wasn’t your astarion, not really.

Why were you reminiscing about your lost love? Well because after all these years apart, he was now standing about 5 feet away from you. Gods above how did you get yourself in this situation?

Let’s start a few years back after Astarion had left to be the new lord of Baldur’s Gate and you had stayed, shattered. Having to pick up the broken pieces of what you once were, having to figure out who you would be without him. You probably should have taken some time alone, now that you think about it. Processed your emotions, talked to a professional, properly mourned what you had lost before continuing on.

Of course, you had done the opposite and instead had decided to travel with Karlach and Wyll to Avernus. Going to hell is probably not the best way to cope with a breakup, but that was the only option anyone could think of to try and save Karlach from the fate of the engine in her chest. And after what had happened to Astarion you just-

You just couldn’t 

You couldn’t lose someone else, if you did, you felt like you would have been shattered past the point of repair. You couldn’t take losing one of your only friends right after losing your love. So you gathered up the broken pieces of yourself and headed straight into the hells. 

You were down there for a few years probably. 

Maybe? 

Honestly, you didn’t remember. Time became sluggish and foggy after Astarion had left because it kept marching forward, away from your time together with him.

Yet in the end, Karlach had gotten her engine fixed and all 3 of you had climbed out of hell. A few more burn marks and scars, but nothing more than that had changed. Physically at least.

You had somehow managed to put your broken pieces back together, but you weren’t the same as before. You didn’t feel complete, more like a jumble of razor-sharp shards being forcefully welded together trying to imitate what you once were. But now you were jagged, and cracked, and tired

Gods, you were tired. The dark circles under your eyes never left, no matter how much you slept. Or tried to sleep that is.

Sometimes in the dead of night, you would replay Astarion's ascendance in your mind over and over again, wondering what you could have done differently then. Or even before. Where had you gone wrong? Was there another outcome that you failed to make happen? Was there another reality where the two of you were happy together? Gods how that thought hurt. 

 Sometimes, you thought about the what-ifs. You imagined what would have happened if he hadn’t chosen to ascend. What both of you could have been. What you so desperately wanted but could never reach. Eventually, you stopped that line of thought at night. It was too crushing to imagine how things could have been different. What you could have done differently. 

After emerging from hell, you had on and off traveled with some of your previous party. 

You and Wyll had headed to Waterdeep once to help Gale with a sea monster problem 

In an amusing team-up, you had helped Halsin and Lazel find an enchanted bracelet they were both searching for, though they both argued on how to act upon most things during that entire adventure, so you had felt almost like it was a babysitting gig the entire trip. 

There was also that time you helped Minsc dispose of some bandits robbing people near Baldur's gate, but you had dealt with that sorry lot fairly quickly and got far away from Baldur's Gate even quicker. You didn’t want to accidentally run into a certain lord. 

And now you had an entirely new quest, in the bitter cold land of Sossal. A few weeks ago, you met back up with Karlach who apparently had been looking for you.

It’s not that you disliked seeing Karlach at all, in fact, you were both very close, which was part of the problem really. Part of why it stung a little to see her. 

She saw you. She saw how much you hurt even after all this time. Your other friends seemed to have assumed that you had gotten better. That over time you had healed and it had gotten easier for you to come to terms with leaving Astarion. But Karlach knew the truth, She saw right through you, and it was mortifying. That every day the hole inside your heart had just got wider. She feared it would swallow you up one day, and you didn’t blame her. It didn’t help that being around her just made you feel so

Pathetic. 

She had been to literal Hell and back and could still smile and laugh, while you had only lost one person and had cracked and splintered like glass. It hurt to see the light that shined off her while you could only fall deeper into darkness. 

Of course, you knew none of that was her fault, you only had yourself to blame for who you were, so when she came asking for help, you didn’t hesitate to say yes. 

She was having engine troubles again. It wasn’t as bad as before, thank the gods, but it did have a tendency to overheat ever so slightly whenever she felt a strong emotion, and if you didn’t do something one wrong spook could set her ablaze. Luckily she had gone to Gale first and discovered a gem Called the frostbite tear. He could attune the gem to Karlach and make it so that every time her engine began to overheat, the jewel would immediately cool it down, negating the problem before it became a real issue like when you had first met her. Last anyone had heard of the gem it was with some noble in Sossal. 

So here you were. You, Karlach, Shadowheart, and Gale all together at the midwinters ball held here in the capital. Gale had procured the invites for you all, and every noble in Sossal, plus some from other territories, would be here for this celebration. Gale had even been nice enough to give you a beautiful outfit for the ball, made of silvery-white sparking silk. It reminded you of fresh snowfall on a winter's night. Admittedly it wasn’t very practical, and Gale did make you shower before putting it on. (Rude. You didn’t think you smelled t h a t bad.)

You were so focused on helping find this noble (and robbing him of the frostbite tear) that you hadn’t even considered Astarion might be here. 

Not up until the moment that his vibrant red eyes locked onto yours across the room. 

You couldn’t move. Everything was moving too fast and also in slow motion. Your legs felt like lead and your mouth was bone dry. The numbness that had settled in your chest for years now cracked open with new pain, and you weren’t sure which of the sensations you hated more. 

All all this panic and emotions, and yet in your mind all you could think of was how he looked just the same as the day you left. He hadn’t changed. And that made it all the harder. Because now it was easier to forget all the years between you two. He still looked the same as what you saw when you closed your eyes each night. It was Astarion. But on closer examination, not your Astarion. 

There was a coldness to him now. A certain reservation in his smile that made you feel like you would be a mere annoyance to him if you dared to approach. He seemed sharper somehow as well, like a finely honed blade. And his attire was extravagantly beautiful, the white fur-lined cloak he was wearing was probably more expensive than anything you had ever owned, including your current attire. 

You were so busy taking this all in mentally that when you went to glance at him again he was gone. For a split second, you genuinely wondered if you had finally snapped and just hallucinated all of that when an all too familiar hand took yours. 

You hadn't looked away for more than a second and astarion was right there in front of you, kissing your knuckles. The brush of his lips on your skin was nearly enough to bring you to your knees. All these years, and he still had so much power over you with one little motion.

To any outsider, this looked like quite the cute interaction really. The handsome new lord of Baldur's gate spots an incomparable beauty from across the room and is instantly smitten, so he effortlessly woes them the second he steps into the ballroom. But life is no romantic play. 

“Hello darling, it certainly has been a while. We simply must catch up” 

Before you could even attempt to respond, his hands were around your waist, guiding you to the dancefloor as the orchestra began to play, and other couples began to join the dancefloor as well. 

You’d hoped maybe the dance would save you from the conversation, but it seemed the opposite was what occurred, as Astarion leaned closer to your ear to whisper, “So, 7 years without a trace, and suddenly you show up looking positively exquisite. Do tell me what you’ve been up to.” 

Your mouth opens to respond, but you realize you have no idea what to say. What could you possibly say to him, and why would you even say it? 

Luckily you were spared any more torture when you noticed Astarion staring intently at your neck. The sight reminded you of that night you found out he was a vampire spawn, and you had let him drink from you for the first time. But instead of hunger Astarions brown was furrowed with another emotion. Annoyance? Concern? Worry? You couldn’t tell anymore. It had been years since you could tell what Astarion was thinking

His voice broke the silence once again. 

“Is this new?” His long pale fingers brushed across the burn scar near your collarbone.

Ah. So that’s what he was staring at. 

“Well it’s been there a few years, so I wouldn’t really consider it new but-“ you shrug at the end of your sentence, and you both know what you meant. It was only new to him. He may have stayed unchanged all these years, but you certainly hadn’t. And it seemed Astarion was beginning to notice. 

His eyes raked over you, taking in the changes. You were a bit more muscular now, all that constant fighting no doubt. Your new(er) scars were more visible in this outfit, which admittedly was a little revealing and definitely not meant to withstand the harsh outside winter. And the years now showed in the tired look in your eyes. You imagine that your eyes aged you quite a bit honestly, maybe you should be shocked he even recognized you now. 

“So”, he started, decidedly keeping his hand firmly around your waist so you couldn’t run from the conversation, “when you made my undead heart beat again only to toss it on the ground at my feet again like it was nothing all those years ago, I always imagined how nice it would feel to see you struggle while I thrived as lord of Baldur's Gate.” 

Wow. Impressively bad flirting. Had he gotten worse at this over the years? Or maybe he just detested you so much he didn’t even think there was a point in even pretending to like you anymore. 

“But now that I’m actually here and you look-“

He gestured at you vaguely 

“Well a bit like you’d been the one who got dumped, it doesn’t feel very satisfying.” 

“Mhm,” you responded, in a stroke of pure poetry. 

“Darling, you have to give me more than that. The silent treatment after all this time is just petty, even for me.”

He had a point. And part of you did want to know-

“How have you been, Astarion?” 

His steps faltered a little when you said his name, but he quickly recovered, smoothly continuing the dance 

He smirked, his fangs visible on one side “Well certainly better than you if I had to wager, the stuff under my eyes is eyeliner, not sleep deprivation side effects.”

You close the distance between you two involuntarily to get a closer look at his face. He was wearing some sort of golden liquid as eyeliner on his bottom lids. It was subtle but beautiful, and it shined when the light hit his face just right. On instinct, you began to reach towards his face, but you quickly stopped yourself. You needed to stay focused, damnit. You were here to help Karlach.

Astarion's smooth voice cut in once again. “Still making me do all the talking? Honestly, I don’t ever remember you being this quiet before.” 

You startled and realized you had been staring at his face for a while, and then trying to snap yourself out of it, all while not making a sound

Gods you don’t remember it being this hard to talk to him. But then again, you found it harder to talk to anyone these days. you just-

You just didn’t expect that to also apply to Astarion. Further proof that despite him looking the same, there was distance now. A silent gaping chasm that you had no way to cross. But that is what you wanted, wasn't it? To get away from this Astarion. The one who considered you a pet, or an object to be displayed. Treasured, and loved, but never his equal. Never fully having free will, everything you would have done would have had to be something he approved of. 

You loved him, more than anything. You still did. Deep down you knew you would die for this twisted version of your love, and if he asked you to rip out your own heart and serve it to him, you would. But you couldn’t be with him. Everything else you would do for him, but that was where you drew the line. It hurt too much, to be reminded every day of what you had lost. Of what you have failed to protect. That sweet high elf with a silver tongue and a heart of gold he let so few see. The one who wished for freedom more than anything, but still stuck by your side. Because at some point, he wanted to be free with you. And that was not this Astarion. 

Despite all that, just for this moment, you wanted to forget it all. To be held in his arms once again. Maybe, if the gods blessed you, see a real smile of his. You just wanted this one moment. Then your greedy heart would be satisfied. You could burn this image of the two of you dancing forever in your mind and have it sustain you. You’d gladly take another trip to the hells if it meant just a moment where you could pretend you were with your astarion. The one that lived on in your memories. Though you didn’t dare hope that he was still in there somewhere, you don’t think your heart could take it. 

You inhale deeply and begin to talk. You tell him about the quests you’ve been on, the adventures you’ve had, what you’ve been up to these past years. Including why you were here, and your quest to help Karlach and find the frostbite tear.

Eventually, you get to the point where you tell him why you're here, and what you're looking for. But as you do you see a scowl twist on his face. 

“Astarion?” You question, “What’s bothering you?”

He huffs in reply, and you can’t help but smirk. 

“I’m sorry but I do remember someone just talking about how petty the silent treatment is.” You prod, and lock eyes, a sign for him to tell you what’s on his mind

He rolls his eyes at your persistence, but nonetheless, he begins to speak. 

“Hm. Just seems like you and Karlach are so very happy together. A bit of a downgrade if you ask me, but that’s certainly no fault of hers. I mean, once you’ve had me, all you can do is go down from there.” 

“Karlach and I aren’t dating.” You deadpan. 

She was more like a sister to you than anything, and besides you’re pretty sure she already has eyes for someone. 

“Oh?” Astarions eyebrow raises. “So who have you been shagging all these years then? Wyll? Shadowheart? Surely not Gale. Oh please tell me it’s not Gale, I think that might actually hurt my feelings a little if we both shared being to your tastes.” 

“Be nice. Gales is a good friend. FRIEND. They all are. And to answer your prying question, I’m not with anyone. Not since you.” 

It was true. You hadn’t loved anyone since astarion. It just didn’t feel right. Even the idea of a casual fling didn’t feel at all satisfying. And there was no way you would actually consider dating someone again. Not when Astarion still held your heart. 

You could see a few emotions go across Astarion’s face, but you couldn’t recognize them. You remember when you used to be able to know what he was thinking, when he was lying or not. But not anymore. Maybe it was because he was always putting on some act now. 

As you stared, his hand wrapped around your waist and for a breathless moment, he effortlessly lifted you up into the air, gently twirling you around him. then he put you down and smoothly continued the dance as if that was always part of the steps. 

Your face flushed at the amount of contact, and the smirk once again graced Astarion’s lips.

“So, nobody since me? Seems like someone’s not quite over the Lord of Baldur’s Gate.” He singsonged, taking great pleasure in how momentarily flustered you were. “It's ok if you're not over me darling, I can’t blame you.” 

Clearly, he meant this as a joke, one you were supposed to roll your eyes at and ignore. But there was no point in lying, so you just nodded and continued the steps of the dance. 

Astarion stopped dead in his tracks. 

“I-

Wait what? You're still-

Ah- 

You're not over me?” 

“Astarion, the song isn’t over.” You tried to nudge him back into the dance, but his feet were planted firmly, and he wasn’t going to budge. 

“Answer me.” 

You sigh. He wasn’t going to move. So now you were just standing here. In the middle of a ballroom. With everyone else dancing around you. Great. This was super inconspicuous and undercover. 

“I will only continue to talk if you move your damn feet Astarion. Hells I’m supposed to be blending in not standing out.” You hiss and kick at the side of his shoes to indicate for him to get moving.

He recognizes the determination in your eyes and you can see him deciding mentally that he’ll probably get his answer sooner if he does as you ask, so he picks up the dance once again. His grip on your waist is now like iron though, not painful in any way, but there’s absolutely no way you could get out of his grasp now. Not even if you put all your efforts into trying. 

His eyes never left yours, his intense stare practically commanding you to talk.

Which you did say you would do. 

“I still love you.” You shrug. “Never stopped loving you.”

“Then why did you leave?” The hurt in his voice is evident, and you immediately feel like someone hurled a spear of ice directly into your chest. 

You can barely raise your voice above a whisper without it cracking. “You know why. I already told you when I left.” 

“Bullshit. Because you loved the person that I was? He was pathetic. Only a fool would want the lesser version.” His voice was like ice, you could feel the hatred he held for himself.

And you instantly felt your anger flare up at his words.

“Don’t you ever talk about-

About him like that”

It felt weird referring to past Astarion as someone else. But it was true. They were two completely different people now. And honestly, you didn’t care about the semantics, your blood was practically boiling. 

“He was the love of my life. He was everything to me. So don’t you dare insult him.” You spat, practically seeing red

Astarion's face twisted in rage. 

“Maybe you liked me pathetic, hm? Maybe the only way you could possibly love me was if I was beneath you. A precious pet spawn, entirely dependent on you, living in your shadow to protect me from the sun that I now bask in.” He sneered, meeting your rage with his own.

And just like that, you had shattered all over again. 

It was your turn to stop dancing now, unmoving in the sea of swaying nobles. 

Astarion's rage seemed to have flickered out seeing the look on your face.

What did your face look like? Were you shocked? Were you crying? Somewhere in the back of your mind, you could register the feeling of hot tears down your cheeks, but you paid it no heed. 

Instead, you wrapped your arms around Astarion, putting your face in the crook of his neck. 

Astarion completely froze at the sudden contact, not even taking a breath. Although he probably didn’t need to actually breathe anyways so maybe that was normal.

“I’m sorry. If-

-If you truly believe that I ever thought that way about you, then I messed up beyond repair. I'm so sorry.” 

You tried to continue, to apologize for all the times you had failed him. For making him feel like that. But you realized you couldn’t speak. Your body was silently heaving with sobs, tears flowing down your face and ruining Astarion's nice clothing.

Great. You couldn’t even cry without screwing him over. And this was definitely not inconspicuous. 

You lifted your head, making a move to step away, but as you did you saw a blue glint on one of the lapels of some well-dressed lord.

Holy shit.

The frostbite tear. You had found it. And all it took was sobbing on your ex to spot the damn thing. That didn’t make you feel pathetic at all. Though admittedly this was the perfect distraction from this soul-crushing conversation. Maybe with any luck you wouldn’t even have to address that embarrassing display that no doubt disgusted astarion, he was probably hoping you’d get the hell off him already.

So you did just that, jerking back from the hug and keeping your eyes glued on the gem. 

“Astarion look. It’s the frostbite tear. On that lord.”

But you could tell Astarion’s eyes were firmly glued to your face. 

You tried to slip away, to follow the frostbite tears owner and relieve him from its ownership, whether that be by swiping it, lying, or just straight up threatening the guy. But Astarion held you firmly in place. 

“What are you doing?” You whispered, to not startle your target. “He’s right there. Let go.”

“You can’t just drop that on me and leave” he whisper-yelled back 

“I’m not leaving, I’m just grabbing something real quick. Now let go, it’ll take 5 minutes tops.”

“What if you decide you don’t wanna talk again and run off?” He countered 

“Then you can corner me because you're the vampire ascendant.” 

“What if he catches you and you get arrested?”

“Then you can visit me in jail because you're the vampire ascendant.” 

“What if-“

Oh for fucks sake. 

“Whatever happens, I assure you, you will be able to say whatever you want to me after because you are the vampire ascendant. You made that fact very clear to me when we were together. Now let go.” You cut him off, and then try once again to move towards the target. But his grip remained firm 

You look up at him, now filled with annoyance and desperation. The noble could escape if you didn’t do something now, and yet Astarion seemed insistent on trapping you. 

“Just one more dance, alright?” He bargained.

Unbelievable. That was his priority? You knew it had been a while but you never expected him to disregard a former ally so blatantly. Karlach needed this. 

But upon closer inspection, he almost looked… a little guilty? Worried maybe? That didn’t seem right. What on earth?

Just then, Astarion pushed your face into his chest, wrapping his arms around you, almost protective. Protective but restrictive. You couldn’t move away no matter how much you pushed on his chest or tried to slip out of his hold. 

“Astarion. Let. Go.” You hissed.

But your attempts at breaking free immediately stopped when you heard an ear-piercing screech and the sound of heavy footsteps. 

On instinct, you reached for where your weapon would normally be, but you had nothing on you. Shadowheart had a few small weapons concealed on her in case things got messy, considering her attire was a bit more conservative than yours, but she wasn’t anywhere near you now. 

Damnit. On instinct, you tried to twist around in Astarion's grasp to a more protective stance. Of course, you knew he didn’t need your protection at all, it was just a base instinct kicking in. Unfortunately, he didn’t allow you to move out of his grasp, so all you could do was squirm. 

“What is wrong with you??” You practically shouted. If there was danger, then just standing here like this would leave you both wide open. Had he lost all common sense? 

Unless- 

At that exact point, a guard of the lord of Sossal burst through the doors, covered in blood. 

“Vampire spawn are attacking the gates!” She exclaimed, cradling her arm, which was profusely bleeding. 

“I didn’t know you would be here.” He murmurs, almost as if he’s telling this to himself more than you. 

He wasn’t trying to keep you here, you realize. He was protecting you. None of the spawn would dare come near you if they saw Astarion holding you like this. 

But at this moment you didn’t care. For years you had mourned over the loss of your Astarion. You had tried so hard, attempting to separate him from this ascended Astarion. But you had never been truly able to get over him, to accept he was gone. Because deep, deep down, no matter what you told yourself, you still believed he was in there somewhere. Behind all the silks and sharp gazes.

And you felt that hope die as you heard the hissing of the dozens of spawn outside, mingled with the screams and cries of the guards. He was gone. And your heart was shattered all over again. 

But it was different this time. Before, you had pulled yourself together again, deformed and jagged, but still together. You couldn’t do that this time. There was no coming back from this. You could feel it. This pain wouldn’t fade. But there was something else there that wasn’t there before. Anger.

Astarion was protecting you, yes, but Gale, Shadowheart, and Karlach were here too. If the spawn got into the ballroom, they would be in danger. Not to mention this made procuring the frostbite tear infinitely more difficult. 

Rage burned in your eyes, and for the first time, you saw the great vampire ascendant stumble over his words a little, as he tried to explain something about how the lord of Sossal had insulted him, but you weren’t listening. 

While Astarion was struggling to explain himself, you realized he wasn’t paying as much attention to you. Good.

In one swift movement, you slipped out of his grasp and frantically looked around, searching for your friends. It was nearly impossible to hear anything over the screaming and panic of the nobles. It also wasn’t helping that Astarion was probably going to be right on your heels the second he recovered. Or maybe he’d just leave you to be eaten by his spawn. You didn’t really care. 

After continuing to weave your way past frantic nobles and shouting their names, you were able to see a red hand waving you down from the far left balcony. It was Karlach, and she was with Gale and Shadowheart. Good. With all 3 of them together any spawn that came after them would be screwed. But you still had a mission to complete.

You looked up at Shadowheart and held your hand out for a weapon. You were going to track down that damn gem if it killed you. That noble was about to have a very bad day. Well. A worse day. 

You were focusing all your hurt onto this, all your rage. But you needed to. You needed it because you had no idea what else you could do now. You needed something to focus on. Something to distract you from your shattered heart. 

Shadowheart saw your determination and tossed a short sword down to you. Not your preferred weapon of choice, but it would do.

You whipped around, hand around the short sword at the ready, but also because it felt grounding, to be fighting once again. Now it was time to hunt down your prey.

You quickly ran in the direction you’d last seen, glancing over every lapel for that glowing blue light. It was hard, many of the nobles were dressed in a winter theme, so shades of white, silver, and blue were all too common in the sea of panic. 

You continued to push past nobles, searching for that faint blue glow. You refused to let this go, you would not let Karlach down. You fought for too many years in hell getting the engine in her repaired to go all the way back to square one again. 

You feel yourself tunnel vision on finding a blue light, your head whipping back and forth on the hunt, it felt good to let everything else fade away into numbness as your only thought is tracking down this gem.

A glimmer out of the corner of your eye. A flash of blue. The shine of fine silk. There he was. In a crowd of panicked nobles trying to run into other parts of the castle and hide from Astarion's horde gathering outside. Honestly, it was a pretty understandable reaction, you didn't blame him for running at all, but you needed that gem. You hope he survived honestly.

Survived.

Because Astarion planned to turn this place into a bloodbath. Your Astarion. The one who you had sat under the stars with, and he would teach you all the constellations whose names you didn't know, his silky voice lulling you to sleep when insomnia or worry had hit you. 

You'd rather still be in the hells honestly. 

You took a deep breath, centering yourself back to the present. Get the gem. 

You dashed after the noble, drawing your shortsword and charging at the man. If possible, you'd do this quickly.

Ducking under the other guests, you grab this unfortunate noble by the collar, the moment you do he screeches, clearly fearing the worst. Luckily for him, you were only after his gem, not his blood. With one slice you cut the gem off the cloak, shredding the beautiful white fabric. 

Not even bothering to explain yourself to him, you pocket your prize and turn on your heel, heading back in your friend's direction, when all of a sudden you hear the noble you had just stolen from scream again. But this time it was followed by the screams of a few others 

You look back and that’s when you see her. A vampire spawn. Clearly on her way to the ballroom, but judging by her smile, it was clear she had just found some horderves. 

You could have run. You were the only person with a weapon and the farthest away from her. She definitely wouldn’t pick you as her first target, she’d go for one of the defenseless nobles right next to her. You should have met up with the others and gotten the hells out of this place.

But the noble whose lapel you had just torn apart was so young. They were people. Scared people who got unlucky and were about to die because someone had offended the great vampire ascendant. Maybe you wanted to save them. But more likely, you just wanted something to take your anger out on. Or maybe you were just dumb as a rock.

But regardless you turned around and began to sprint towards the spawn instead of away, angling your weapon so that you would have the perfect angle to go for her collarbone. 

Yet as soon as you locked her on as a target, her eyes went wide with..fear? She was a vampire spawn, surely she’d had a few of her victims fight back yes? Was this her first hunt? 

Soon you realized that wasn’t the case at all as you felt a chill run down your spine. Even now with all his power, it wasn’t hard for you to identify the presence now standing menacingly right behind you. The familiar smell of bergamot filled your senses with the closeness. You could feel his chest pressed against your back. You didn’t know what kind of face Astarion was making right now, but whatever it was, it terrified the vampire spawn, her form now shaking and cowering before her master. 

Funny. Even now after everything, you couldn’t find astarion scary. You probably should, considering how he just appeared behind you. But after everything you still couldn’t. 

There was no point in delaying this any further. You turn around, and as you do his eyes immediately move from the spawn back to you. And his gaze softened. Before this whole ordeal that single action probably would have caused you to melt. But now it was different. You had already resigned yourself to being without him. You couldn’t turn back time. You couldn’t save him. All you could do now was try and find a way forward. And you certainly wouldn’t find that staring into his crimson eyes. 

This felt awful. You felt awful. Walking away from him now didn’t feel like closure, it felt like someone had just stopped writing on the page mid-sentence. But you had to stop. Just stop. You couldn’t spend the rest of your life like this, mourning what you lost. Astarion would have an eternity to forget about you, but you only had this one life. And for the first time in a long time, you finally felt like you wanted to move forward with your life. To start living again. You were still mad. And upset. And it still hurt. But you wanted to get better. 

So you turned around, not looking at Astarion, and left. Walked right past him without saying a word. You didn’t know what he would do. Let you leave and forget you ever existed? Grab your arm and try to talk again? Decide he had had enough and just drain you dry? You honestly had no idea anymore. But you knew one thing.

You wouldn’t be the one to look back.

[honeyedmiller]

Shotgun | Joel Miller

pairing: dbf!joel miller x f!reader

warnings: very poorly written smut (literally just high sex), usage of marijuana, smoking, dbf!Joel, no outbreak!Joel, age gap (reader is in late 20’s; Joel mid 40’s), explicit language, Joel has stronger feelings for reader than he can admit… like it’s so much pining omg, no use of y/n, tiny bit of a plot. 18+, minors do not interact.

word count: 2.3k

synopsis: you and Joel smoke together for the first time.

You knew it was wrong—both of you did. But did that stop you?

Absolutely not.

You see, Joel should be completely off-limits. He was your dad’s best friend, after all. But, you couldn’t help yourself. Neither could he. After one drunken evening about a month back, both of you gave in to satisfy your cravings for each other. No one had to know, and they were never going to know.

Messing around in secret was exhilarating and honestly, pretty fucking hot. Joel Miller has fucked you like no man ever has before or ever will, and he made sure you were aware of that. He satisfied all your needs which kept you craving more of him. That explains why you’re sitting on the couch on his back porch at nearly midnight.

The cool night breeze wrapped around your body in comfort. You winced at the pain between your legs, having just gotten the life fucked out of you by said hottest middle aged man you’ve ever laid your eyes on.

“Here darlin’.” Joel steps outside in nothing but his boxers while you sport his oversized t-shirt with nothing underneath.

Joel hands you a water bottle and you thank him, uncapping it and taking a few much needed sips. He sat beside you on the loveseat, spreading his legs as he rested his head on the back of the couch. He closed his eyes for a brief second as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

His tan skin glowed under the moonlight, muscles outlined by the shadows the light cast. Joel opened his eyes again and looked at you, eyes dark and seemingly hungry for more.

“Look better in my shirt than I do, baby.” He chuckles, sitting straight up before reaching for something on the table beside him. He pulled out a small tin box, opening it swiftly before taking out its contents. It took you a second to register what exactly it was, and when you did, your eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“You smoke, Miller?” You laugh as you eyed the joint between his thumb and index finger.

“Only sometimes. You?”

“Mhm.” You nod, pursing your lips.

“Here.” Joel held the joint up so you could take it between your lips, which you accept gingerly. He grabbed the lighter from the tin box before flicking it on, the soft glow of the orange flame illuminating his features. He brought the lighter to the end of the joint, lighting it for you before flicking it off as the end of the joint crackled.

You inhaled deeply, taking the joint from your lips before handing it to Joel. You exhaled as he took a hit, taking the time to look at him. He looked freshly fucked, but peaceful. You smirk at the thought as the sounds of his moans replay in your head, arousing you once more. You squirm in your seat, and Joel notices.

He looks at you with a quirked eyebrow but doesn’t say a word as he hands you the joint again. You take it and move closer to him, inhaling before grabbing his jaw softly so he had to open his mouth. Your face was mere inches from his when you blew the smoke into his mouth. His warm hand grasped your bare thigh, giving it a squeeze. He took one more hit before he leaned forward to stub the half finished joint in the tin box.

He leans back and looks at you, tongue poking out to wet his lips. The tension was thick and god, you just wanted him to fuck you again.

You don’t know if it was the way he was looking at you or the weed (hell, could’ve been both), but you took the initiative to straddle his lap and kiss him hungrily. He chuckled into the kiss at first before moving his hands over your ass, giving it a firm squeeze. You moaned into the kiss, bucking your hips down onto his now half-hard cock.

You pulled away for a quick breather, and Joel had a shit-eating grin on his face.

“Insatiable little thing, aren’t ya?” He tsked.

“Don’t act like you don’t like it, Miller.” You retorted, grinding your hips down onto him. He could feel how wet you were through the thin fabric of his boxers, and he groaned softly.

“Fuck, angel. You’re gonna be the death of me.” Joel brought his lips back to yours and you both kissed each other with such fervor. Your hands tangled in his hair as you rocked your hips back and forth, the friction from the cloth of his boxers catching your clit just right. You separated your lips from Joel’s and trailed soft kisses down his jawline, taking your time as you moved down to that one spot on his neck that you knew drove him wild.

You nipped at the spot, licking it to soothe the bite as his fingers dug into your flesh. Your kisses trailed even further to his collarbones and dragged your lips back up to his. You separated from him for a second, staring into his dark eyes as you felt the high consume your body. You lazily smiled at him before toying with his hair.

“Need you, Joel.” Your voice is a soft purr, and he grips your hips in response.

“Guess I can’t keep you waitin’ then, huh baby?” He teases. His eyes were hooded as they stared over your features, not giving one damn in the whole world in that moment that you were his best friend’s daughter.

You made him feel things he hadn’t felt in a very long time, but he’d take those feelings to his grave before he ever admitted that to you.

Wordlessly, Joel picked you up by your thighs and brought you both into the house, back door slamming shut as he made his way upstairs with you. You littered his neck with slow, wet, sloppy kisses in the meantime. When he got to his bedroom, he laid you down on his bed. He couldn’t help but admire you from above, taking his time to soak in the view of you in his t-shirt.

You whined softly, bringing yourself up on your elbows so you could pout at him playfully. “Don’t keep me waiting Mr. Miller.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He slots himself between your legs, holding himself up by his forearms. He could feel the weed taking its affect on his body as his mind begins to become hazy. He feels elated and all he wants to do is kiss you and fuck you slowly. It was his way of showing you how much you actually meant to him without saying a single word.

So, he did just that. He leaned down to capture your lips with his, cradling your face softly with one hand as the other cupped your heat, sliding his fingers against the slickness that had once again gathered.

He went slow. Gentle. Like you were a precious doll made of porcelain and if he made any sudden movements, you’d crack. He doesn’t know how he got tangled into this, how he fell for his best friend’s daughter. It was unfair. Unfair that he couldn’t like a woman his age, nonetheless a woman that wasn’t his best friend’s daughter. Unfair that you were perfect to him and everything he’s ever wanted. It was so fucking unfair.

Your wanton moans broke him from his heavier thoughts, ones that clenched at his heart in the slightest. He moved down your body, leaving sloppy kisses along the way until he was faced with your slick, aching cunt. You shivered as his hot breath hit your core, silently begging the man to use his skilled tongue on you.

Luckily he didn’t keep you waiting much longer. He delved his tongue into your heat, starting with precision as he flicked over your clit multiple times. You inhaled sharply at the sensitivity already there, but bliss soon took over and you tangled your fingers through his already disheveled hair, pushing his face into you more. He moaned at the action, completely blissed out while he was eating you out like a man starved.

He was sloppy with it this time, not caring that your arousal was on his bed sheets and all over the bottom half of his face. He took two fingers and sunk them into you, curling them up to find that spongy spot that drove you wild. Your hips were writhing beneath him, and he looked up at you with an adoring stare.

He loved to see the way he made you feel, at least physically. You never really spoke of your feelings or emotions toward him, if you had any in the first place. Maybe this was just sex for you. An experienced, older man knowing what makes your body tick. What you like, and how you like it. The thought made his heart sink a little but he always had to pull himself back to the reality of it all: you two were never going to happen.

Joel admits he’s a bit delusional for having such thoughts, and he wishes he could whisk them away and forget he ever even had them. But, the more time he spend with you, the harder he found to do so.

Your unraveling is what pulled him from his nagging thoughts. You moaned loudly, cumming hard around his fingers and mouth. He made sure to clean every drop you gave him, like the gentleman he is.

He moved up your body again and pressed kisses against your abdomen, sliding his shirt on you up with his hands so he could envelope the soft flesh of your breasts into his mouth. You whined at the feeling, his hot tongue making you flutter around nothing once again.

“Need you, Joel. Please.” You repeat, voice much more coarse post-release, but who could blame you? Joel Miller was a man who knew how to give earth-shattering orgasms.

“Need you too, baby.” In more ways than one.

He slid his boxers off to free his painfully hard erection, sliding the tip of his cock against your folds before pushing into you slowly. No matter how aroused you were, you always found yourself having to adjust to his girthy size. You two’ve fucked countless times before in the past month and the sheer size of him astonishes you every single time.

You gasp softly as he sank to the hilt, bottoming out into you with a low groan. You lazily wrapped your legs around his waist, breath ragged as you focused on the pure pleasure that is Joel Miller. His pace was slow and his lips were tentative. He made sure to kiss you all over your face and neck as he slid in and out of you languidly.

The room was a mix full of moans and skin on skin and the smell of sex. It was impressive how Joel’s libido really was. But, then again, you never took into account that it was just you that drove him wild. Your eyes fluttered open for a second and you saw Joel staring down at you with a look in his dark eyes that you couldn’t quite decipher. It was one you’d never seen before, but it was soft and full of emotion. You batted your lashes before bringing him down by his neck gently to kiss him, and in that moment, it felt so intimate. His slow pace, the passionate kiss, the unsaid words and the look in his eyes was telling you that this was more to him than just sex.

But why you? Fuck. Maybe it was just your stoned mind overthinking everything. Yeah—that’s it. This meant nothing more than just a casual fuck, as you two’ve been doing all along.

Joel’s pace got slightly faster, but not by much. If you were completely sober you’d be well aware of the fact that this was like him making love to you. Sober you would’ve stopped this from the jump. Sober you would’ve told him to fuck you until you saw stars. But, intoxicated you secretly enjoyed the slowness and fullness of the man above you, rocking in and out of you with such tenderness.

Joel’s hand moved down to your already aching and swollen clit, rubbing small circles around it. You clenched around him which caused him to groan, and you knew you both were close.

“‘M close.” Joel choked out the words, and you nodded in accordance.

“Me too.” You meekly uttered, head tossed back onto his pillow as your jaw fell slack. The burning heat in your core rushed throughout your body, and Joel came undone at your undoing. You both moaned loudly in unison, thanking the heavens above that Sarah was at a friend’s house tonight.

Joel plopped down beside you on the bed, both of you breathless and fucked out. You noticed that your high was sadly starting to waver, but you got the munchies. You sat up slowly, brushing your hair out of your face before turning your head to look down at Joel. He was already looking at you with curiosity, and you offered him a small smile.

“Got any snacks?” You ask, and he laughs.

“C’mon darlin’, let’s satisfy those cravings.” Joel’s cheeky innuendo didn’t go unnoticed as his shirt fell down your bare body once again. You both went downstairs after he put his boxers on again and raided the cupboards for the good snacks, which were indeed Sarah’s. Joel made a mental note to replace them later.

He looked at you as you munched on some chips ahoy cookies from a small bag. This felt way too domestic, but a part of him didn’t mind it.

Maybe in another life, in another universe, you wouldn’t be off limits. You’d be his, and you’d both be happy.

Maybe in another life, in another universe, you felt the same way about him as he did for you.

Just maybe.

i don’t really have a tag list but as promised i’d tag you @cool-iguana i hope you enjoyed this <3

[whatusername00]

Which Baldur's Gate Characters Know How To Lace Up Their Clothing - Others

Other people I've run into that lace some part of their outfit. This might be the last part, it might not, it just depends on if I find more as I replay the game. On we go.

Starting with the man who put this in my brain, Lord Enver Gortash. Couldn't even be bothered to lace his shirt properly at his ceremony to become Archduke. Did he lace it while wearing his gloves? That's fun to imagine. This man is just straight up skipping eyelets while doing up his shirt. There's also a bit of lacing missing that should come from the third eyelet from the bottom right, and some lacing that should come from the bottom of the eyelet above that. I can't believe I didn't notice this monstrosity until my 7th playthrough. 0/10 get your shit together.

Nine-Fingers has the same lacing on her arm that Lakrissa and Zorru have, so my gripes are the same. One side laces over while the under laces under, when they should match. Why did she use two separate lacing strings? At least there are visible knots. 7/10.

I really hate this man, so it irks me that Lorroakan's lacing is really good. I feel like it would fit his character if it was just a little off. But really, the only thing off I can say is that there's no knot. I will begrudgingly give him a 9/10.

Barcus wears the same outfit that Cal wears. He's perfect, everything is beautiful, 10/10. Oh, 10/10 on the lacing too.

The shoulder lacing still bugs me because the ends aren't even, so 8/10. And honestly, the more I think about it, the more I feel like I would constantly feel the weird gap even over whatever he's wearing underneath. Maybe that's just me.

Omeluum and Blurg both wear the same undershirt that Asharak, Danis, and Kanon wear. And this lacing just isn't possible without tacking it into place, which would defeat the purpose of lacing at the neckline. It's not possible because threading into and then out of the same eyelet just pulls the lacing back out. So I love these two, but 0/10.

And finally we have Helsik. I almost didn't include her because her gauntlets don't lace through eyelets, they lace through these little loops, but look. The rare, elusive knot. And the lacing is physically possible. Also, I didn't notice the lack of eyelets until I put the picture on this post. But listen. Maybe I'm sick of eyelets after putting 120 into a pair of pants earlier this year. And putting some into two corsets on top of that. Maybe I need a break. 10/10.

Like I said earlier, this is probably it for now unless I notice lacing on someone else. I'll be starting a new playthrough when the next patch drops, so we'll see. Bye for now!

Camp Companions

Tieflings

[dizzy-after-dark]

Cauterized | Steve Rogers

BOOM MIC DROP: SMUT FOR THE END OF THE YEAR! Y'all didn't think I would not post once this year, did you. Well, here it is. I TRIED! Mwah; see you in 2024!

Tags: Angst (not really but yeah), SMUT, fluff

Pairing: Nomad!Steve Rogers x F!Reader (Third Person)

Notes: UHHHHH 18+ BUCKOS; this is a continuation of Ignorant, which is the first part and angsty as FUCK but a personal fave of mine if I do say so myself; been really thinking about finishing my requests from over a year ago for Dinner At Dizzy's on my other account, @dizzydancingdreamer (masterlist linked if you're feeling peckish)

Warnings (what to expect, ig): oral (f recieving), fingering, sex (???), uhhhm lack of descriptive writing from a rusty author, sappiness, swearing, bad metaphors, shower sex, alcohol consumption (BARELY), size kink, over-use of the word "Stevie"

Word Count: 4.6k

She pushes the door closed, turning the shower on lazily. Her muscles ache as she twists the knob all the way to the left. Somewhere, sometime she was told about cauterization. You can seal wounds closed with fire— forcibly fuse the skin back together. She has no cuts. Nothing to fuse. And only hot water. However, maybe stepping into the scalding stream might fix the part of her brain that keeps replaying it all, over and over. 

Baby I— 

If anything, it might numb her. She would take that too right now. Hence the bottle on the counter, partially drunk and already open. She takes the first swig, the liquid like fuel to the inferno raging in her stomach, burning the rest of her in the process. The taste is acrid— she’s never been much of a drinker. She just wants to forget it all. Setting it down with a clunk, she strips out of grimey shirt, letting it puddle at her feet. 

Looking at the material, which at one point was a stark white but will now forever be a dingy gray, she laughs. Not really but, yeah, kind of— one of those half amused huffs, anyway. A pity laugh, for the state of her life. That shirt is practically trash. Even if she had the time, energy, or resources to wash it, there’s no way it’ll ever be the same. 

She should just throw it out. 

Is she even talking about the shirt anymore?

She kicks it into the corner, hands falling to the button of her jeans, swollen knuckles screaming as she fails a few times to push the little metal circle through the loop.

“Goddamnit,” she mutters to herself, and to the ghosts, and the spider she saw in the corner when she came in but didn’t have the heart to make the latter as well. 

She’s already made too many ghosts. 

“I, uh, I can help?”

None of those ghosts have ever answered before, though. 

Whirling around, fists balling in front of her face, she readies herself in less than a breaths time to send said ghost straight back to the grave—

“Woah, easy there, baby—”

Only to find Steve, his baby blues wide and a tad panicked but his hand nevertheless peeking through the crack of the door, reaching for her. Mind glazing over with confusion and, well, a fair bit of something russian and label-less, she blinks up at him and the damn door. She closed that— she remembers closing it… right? 

Her eyes flick down and the fire in her belly kindles a little more. 

“Are you kidding me?” She groans, the exhaustion an unwelcome guest in the cavern of her chest.  

His boot, right there in the doorway, holding the measly wooden traitor open. She never heard the damn click. Didn’t even bother to listen for it. Rookie mistake, honestly. She can’t even be mad, really. 

“Please just let me help.” Steve pushes past the door, both arms now extended towards her, but he doesn’t touch her yet. 

He’s waiting. She stays silent. Partly because she has no idea what to say— or what she wants— and partly because he hates it. He absolutely, agonizingly hates when she gives him the silent treatment. She watches his jaw tick, lips pressing together until they go white, and there’s a sick part of her that relishes in the cool satisfaction rushing down her spine. 

You made me like this.

But there’s also a part of her that mourns with him when he clears his throat, crystal eyes flooding over, liquid and glassy, and lowers his arms slightly. Not all the way. He’s hopeful, maybe. America’s sweetheart is always hopeful, that’s one of the things she fell in love with him for. 

That’s still Steve— her Steve. 

“I know—” Steve swallows, “I messed up. I just— you’re hurt, baby. Lemme’ help.”  

She huffs— why is it so fucking complicated? Why can’t they just be normal?

She is hurt. Nothing needs cauterizing but there’s no denying her mottled skin, blue-ish under the crappy motel bathroom lights. Her hands throb, joints screaming at her— when she turns to the mirror, she almost gags at the slight bald patch behind her right ear— fuck, that one had really stung. Absolutely ridiculous the way some people fight these days. 

Her silence is deafening. 

She wants to sob. It’s right there, in the hollow of her throat— she wants to scream. Maybe not at him but in general. She used to live in a penthouse, with all her friends, and the love of her life. Now what? She used to get hurt like this back then too but now it feels purposeless— what are they even doing this for if they have nothing. Have no one. It made sense when she still had him. 

Meeting his gaze in the mirror— disappearing a bit into fogged up glass but there regardless— she still has him. Kind of. But she still doesn’t say anything when she turns back to face him. The frown carved into her face feels vile— deep and disgusting and entirely real— but she can’t make it go away. She can’t stop the sniffle, either. Why can’t she just tell him she misses him?

“Fuck.” 

It’s mumbled under his breath. The Captain America, standing in some rundown wreck of a place off some lonely highway, is swearing. Because of her. Is this hell? It feels like hell. 

But, no, it can’t be, because his hands are so, so gentle as they cup her cheeks, thumbs softly dancing over the bruises, half assessing, half trying. Trying to do what, she doesn’t know. Wipe them away? Commit them to memory? She leans into his touch regardless, conceding ever so slightly. She won’t say it, but he can help. There isn’t a universe in which she would truly deny him. 

The first tear that falls isn’t hers, but his, landing on her forehead right before he buries his face in her hair, wrapping those supersoldier arms around her, trying and, well, failing not to crush her in the process. The tenderness in her broken body is worth it, though, because he smells like home, even if tinged with gunpowder and war. 

“I am so sorry—” he whispers, heartbeat erratic under her ear, chest heaving for breath— “I am so sorry I brought this on you. You’re hurt and it’s my fault.”  

Complicated. She fists his t-shirt as hard as she can— fists in until her hands go numb. It’s not fair how complicated it has to be for them. 

Steve didn’t throw her into the fight, didn’t slam his fist into her eye, or rip her hair out by the handful. Steve didn’t even make her come with him when he left; that was entirely her choice. But he did lose his mind a little bit. Power tripped a little too hard. Focused so much on keeping them all safe that he missed the part where he was just supposed to hug her— and that’s what sucked most— but he is now, right?

That has to count for something? 

He pulls back and her fingers tighten, steeling, tensing. He can’t go, even if she isn’t sure what they are anymore. 

The agony in his eyes when he draws the line from her balled fists holding on for dear fucking life to her own, misty gaze is indescribable. “Baby I don’t know how to fix this. I want to, I—” he clears his throat again and her frown carves even further into her skin, eyebrows drawing together— “I want to so fucking bad.”

He plants his forehead against hers and it aches, the warmth of his skin. “I don’t want to make it worse. I need you to tell me how to help.” 

There’s a stinging in her throat where the words simply don’t manifest. What the fuck is she supposed to say? Nothing, at all, really, because she doesn’t even know how to fix her and she’s not mad so there’s nothing to fix… but isn’t there? Isn’t there something between them that desperately needs mending? Isn’t she mad? 

Is it anger? 

Or is it something much more primal. 

No, there are no words she can tell him. She could show him, though. Maybe that will work.

Letting his shirt go, she watches the breath catch in his chest, stuck and frantic. She knows that feeling well— that icy desperation to keep holding on no matter what. But she’s only grabbing his hands, not leaving him, and he’ll see that soon so she continues to drag him towards the stupid, little button that her useless fingers couldn’t seem to undo. In hindsight, maybe they were just waiting for him. 

Realizing, his forehead is off hers quickly, eyes seeking hers. “What? I don’t—” She flattens his palms against her stomach, engulfing the button, and he breathes the last word out— “understand.” 

Her brows raise, cheeks still on fire but now also burning— yes you do. 

“Are you sure?” He asks but there’s a little click— the same one she hadn’t heard earlier— as his boot clad foot kicks the door properly shut, and she’s pretty sure he knows just how sure she is.

All it takes is her thumbs on his, prodding them towards her arch nemesis— damn you, Levi jeans— and the soldier is moving, not rough in his quick actions, but determined. The button is no match for Steve Rogers on a regular day, but today? Now that he has a goal? A starting place? The button may as well have disintegrated under his fingers. 

Her own hands fly to his shoulders, clinging to him as he tugs the blasted jeans off her legs, trying the best she can not to topple over with the sheer force of him. Material pooling at her feet, his palms smooth so slowly back up her now bare legs, rising goosebumps in their wake. She hasn’t been touched in ages— she feels kind of like an animal waking up from hibernation, disorientated and hungry. 

Grabbing at her hips suddenly, her ass is on the cool countertop before she even has the chance to get dizzy. Spreading her thighs with his own, he works on her bra next— this faded, hole ridden thing that if she wasn’t so engulfed in searing, licking desire, she’d probably be embarrassed about. But it’s gone so soon that she doesn’t have a chance and replaced instead with two, bulky hands that entirely engulf her breasts. 

They squeeze her skillfully— with purpose. Thumbs swiping delicious circles around her nipples, flicking this way and that, exactly how he knows she likes it— exactly the way that should have her as a mewling heap in his hold. But she’s not— she’s contained, even as her very skin thrums alive with anticipation. Is this revenge or is it just fucking complicated?

She can’t decide so instead she bites the moan clawing at her throat into small enough pieces to swallow, all the while tuning into something dark that sparks in his ever watchful gaze. 

She’s caught— he gets it now. 

“Really, baby?” He muses, palming her, squeezing just hard enough to give the touch a slight bite. His tone has her feeling like a deer in his headlights— like a freight train is barrelling directly at her and there’s nowhere to go— and she squeezes her thighs around him, welcoming the collision. “You think I won’t work for it?” 

She only blinks at him. Once… twice… 

Her panties are dropped somewhere into the abyss, long forgotten with the rest of her clothes, and his knees thud heavily against the tiled floor. Replacing his body, his head now hovers right in front of a different button, golden hair tickling her sensitive skin as he pulls her legs over his thick shoulders. His skin is warm but not as much as his balmy breath which hits her clit, teasing her into a mess, hands curling around the edge of the counter. 

Come on, Steve. 

But, no, he doesn’t give in to her just yet. First, he turns to her inner thigh, sucking her skin into his mouth with bruising pressure before letting it go with a pop. He peers up— nothing. Moving to the other one, he whispers quick kisses over her sex but never lingers, only biting into her flesh once more once across her mound, teeth almost teasing a whimper from her this time but no, she’s not budging. 

That doesn’t mean he isn’t driving her crazy. Inside, she screams— she craves. C’mon baby just give it to me. Outwardly, her hands drunkenly find his hair, tugging at his soft locks. Now, now, now she chants furiously.

He unseals his lips from her thigh, peering up, less dangerous and back to being her ever hopeful boyfriend— is her her boyf— He kisses her folds, spongy lips lingering a moment, rendering her blank and feverish. Angelic— he’s angelic. From under his long lashes he all but begs her, his dark eyes starving and wanting, but his hands are so soft on her hips, massaging deep into her. It’s this mixture of puppy dog pleading and a knowing of sorts— he knows she’s going to cave eventually.

How does he do that? 

“Words? Please?”

She only pouts and, again, the switch flips. “Fine.”

The word is punctuated with the warm, wet stripe he licks up her center, flicking his tongue languidly over her clit. For as rushed as he’d started this mission, he’s truly never been one to speed through his meals, preferring instead to devour her slowly— expertly— tasting her thoroughly like he has all the time in the world. Meanwhile her body pulses, teetering dangerously already on the knife-sharp edge of too much and too little as he masterfully carves her out. 

Her hands, which had moments ago tried to pull him closer, now use his hair as handles to keep herself from toppling off the counter when he slides her closer to him, burying his face fully into her heat. Heels digging into his back, she watches the spot where his shirt rides up intently, consumed not only by the harsh sucking on her clit but also the tanned, muscled skin peeking out and then disappearing below his own jeans, taunting her. Why hadn’t she taken it off him first? 

She doesn’t have time to think much more about it though because he’s ravenous and she may as well be ice cream, sweet and sticky, melting all over him, dripping down the sides of his face and fingers as they begin prodding against her. They tease, pushing into her but not quite far enough— hard enough.  

His gaze on her is overpowering— it’s deliberate. 

“Y’know,” he speaks against her, the vibrations making her tense, “you can just tell me what you want ‘and I'll do it.”

Her mouth is like sandpaper— her brain, uncooperative. This push and pull is becoming lethal, the next few pokes of his tongue honey slow and spine jolting. Please— she wants to beg. She’s so empty. So, so, achingly empty. Would his fingers even be enough? At this point, it’s as though he would need to crawl into her very chest to fill her up the way she needs to be. How could her words even convey something so needy? 

“Anything, baby. Whatever you want.” 

They can’t, so they don’t, but for the sounds she refuses to make, he doubles in his own, moaning his frustrations right against her. If he can’t make her say anything, he damn sure is going to make her do something. That’s probably why he finally caves, pushing his fingers in to the hilt, and she was stupid to think they couldn’t fill her, the slight burn of them not at all foreign but definitely intense. 

As they bury themselves in her over and over and over again, she bucks against his hand, chasing the start of a little ball of electricity growing in the pit of her stomach, getting higher and higher with every twist of his fingers. Combined with the incessant flick of his tongue— she’s a goner. Stifling the moan, her teeth find home in her lip, biting so hard her mouth gains a slight tang that excites her even more. What’s she even doing? 

Wouldn’t it be more fun if she just let loose? Isn’t that what’s been missing the whole time? The fun? 

When she sees the glint in his piercing stare— impish despite everything they’ve been through— she gets it. It’s hopeless— she is and they are but they’re together and the fun isn’t gone— she’s done. He earned it.

“Stevie—”  she finally cries, animalistic; it doesn’t sound like his name but he must know it is because, even with the intense throbbing consuming her entire body, she can feel his shoulders soften under her thighs— “please don’t stop, I’m so close!”

“That’s it baby,” he coos against her clit, voice raw, compliant as he continues to pump his fingers in time to her squirming, “that’s my girl. I missed that pretty voice of yours.” 

At what point the first orgasm turns into a second, she isn’t sure. It’s all one big blur of her whiny moans, wanton and liquid body, and his hushed prayers against her flushed skin, tongue lapping relentlessly against her. More baby; I know you can give me more. She doesn’t so much hear them as she does become them, absorbing them into her skin. That’s it angel— so good, so good for me.

She can feel him drinking in her mumbled, jagged noises, some words but others mere syllables, coaxed out of her by tongue and fingers all the same. Steve— honey— mmph, fuck, right there— oh my— the words pour out now, dam broken beyond repair, and for some reason, or maybe a lack thereof, it spurs her on even more, a freed woman if ever there was one— 

“Oh my god, Stevie!”

It’s maddening— he’s maddening. 

He’s relentless. 

It isn’t until she yanks his still-eager mouth away from her, stomach iron-tense from way too much overstimulation, does he slowly draw his hand reluctantly back from her shuddering body. His other arm unwinds from where it’s been snaked around her knee, anchoring her to him throughout the duration of his worship. Now pushing him upright, holding him just near enough to where she can hear his labored breaths but not feel them, she shivers, cold as ice without his heat. 

He stares down at her, unmoving, and her heart jumps in her chest. She doesn’t understand— he’s just standing there while she shudders, breathless. His shirt is stretched, no doubt from her pulling at it, and in noticing the damage she remembers how she’s completely naked and he’s completely not. Exposed doesn’t even begin to touch how she feels. 

She wraps her arms around her chest, knees drawing up to tuck under her chin. “Steve?” 

She’d forgotten what it felt like to constantly have him next to her— to have his furnace like warmth melting into her skin almost every minute. Now that she’s had her first real taste of him again, she’s de-acclimated to being alone. She needs him.

“C’mere,” she begs, shaking and a bit confused, why isn’t he touching her still, “please, Stevie, come back.” 

When her fingers finally swipe against his shirt, barely snagging it, he flinches, coming back to her. “Sorry baby, I didn’t mean—” 

She flings herself at him, heart off kilter and erratic in her chest as her lips press against his, swallowing his apologies and hoping beyond anything else that he just catches her, like he always does. He does, kissing her back fervently— reverently. His tongue, tinted with her essence, scoops into her mouth the same way he had been between her thighs. She welcomes the way he takes charge, knowing he holds her against him with every ounce of strength he has.

“—’m sorry,” he pants into her mouth, clearly not satisfied with the success of her attack, “so, so sorry baby.” 

He repeats the words deliriously. Presses them into her hair and against her temple, on her chin and both her cheeks. He especially feeds them to her, word for word, against her lips, soft at first and then rough, frenzied. He’s not talking about right now. He’s still back in that apartment; the fallen angel amongst the rubble, wings too broken to just leave it. 

It’s not complicated. And it’s not revenge, because she could never make him feel worse than he already does, nor would she want to. So, in between kisses and apologies, she answers.

“I know, Stevie.”   

“It’s ok— we’re ok, Stevie.” 

“Steve, stop— I love you!”

He stops. He sets her down, bare feet planting unsteady against the ground. He steps back. What?

“Stevie?” She questions, already moving forward, but his arms, sweeping over his head, towing his shirt up and off, halt her in her tracks. 

Oh.  

 Oh. 

This time, when she says his name it's only a breathy moan, fingers searching for his belt loops and hooking him towards her. In the time it takes for her hands to find the button— this one, thankfully, popping open immediately— there must be a god somewhere who didn’t abandon them in the rubble— he’s back on her, one hand carefully threading through her hair, dragging her mouth back to his, while the other pushes the rest of his clothes to the ground.

“I love you, I love— ah, fuck,” he hisses as her hand wraps around him, thumb brushing over his velvety tip.

For the first time, she smiles against his mouth, calm. “Language, Rogers.”

He pulls back, one neat eyebrow flicked up, but there’s humor in his eyes— no more tension. No more worry. Just fun. He leans down, nuzzling his chin down the side of her face, breath fanning her ear. Her hand stutters as it tugs on him, dragging up and down. He’s so hard— it’s been so damn long. 

“Thought I was Stevie, baby?” It’s an absent minded tease, blush lips parted even after the fact, glued to the way she touches him. 

In turn she watches his face, crowned in a mussed up halo of gold, some of which sticks to his forehead but most falling at every which angle, a product of her thighs sealing themselves around him. She can’t say that she’s never seen him this disheveled but she’ll never get used to it. He’s perfect— she makes him so messy. 

Clearly, she hadn’t been the only one enjoying herself, though, if the heaviness of him between her fingers, rutting into her palm is anything to go by. She squeezes harder, testing something, and he groans something almost inhuman against her neck. Guttural. He’s so close already. It fuels her like nothing else, tickling the part of her that just wants to please. She’s making reparations, too. Speeding up, she works him faster. Come on, honey.  

“Stevie—” she echoes and the next thing she knows, he’s pulling her off him, pushing her towards the steam which billows out from behind the curtain. 

From the moment her feet touch the warm, wet surface of the shower floor, everything is a blur. The water sprays over her harshly, but only for a moment, before he overpowers it with his own, massive body, just as searing against her skin. She registers the slick splat of her back against the wall, a grunt— missed this, baby, and her own feral howl as he slams into her. There’s no waiting, no tiptoeing, only his cock sealing them together furiously once more. 

One of her legs is hiked up impossibly far, hinging near his hip where his hand crushes her to him. The other leg holds her up— barely— heel raised, toes splaying for grip as she reaches higher. He’s just so big— so tall and so thick. So impossible to adequately open herself to without him fully lifting her but she wants to try so she does her best to meet his brutal pace, clinging around his neck desperately. 

If his fingers had filled her entirely, his cock is almost unbearable. She relishes it, though, the way she can almost feel him in her damn throat with each and every drag. It’s mesmerizing, the way there’s no need for adjustment— for remembering. He knows her body like it’s his own and it makes her drool with pleasure.   

The slapping of their skin together proves to be louder than the rush of the water, but not more so than Steve whose mouth is working over time, ladeling praises directly into her ear, soaked, stubbly chin grating deliciously against her temple.

“You look so pretty baby,” he hums, staring mesmerized at their bodies to where he slips in and out of her, “ look at you taking me so well.”  

And she does. 

It’s a lewd notion, the way she can see exactly where he is inside her by the way her belly ripples with his plunges, but one that makes her gasp nonetheless, spasming around him which is also visible to both of them. Loosening one of her hands from its vice grip on his shoulder, he places it on the exact spot, urging her to feel just how big he is. With every sloppy push and pull, she does feel it, and it sends her reeling.

“See that?” He rasps, and she can only nod, mouth agape enough for some of the water falling off his hair to drip into it. 

She swallows it, tongue somehow so, so dry despite everything. Her nerves are on fire, everything so much slower than it should be. 

The agonizing pull of his hand on hers, dragging her own fingers under his to toy with her clit. 

The little circles that take hours to complete but nurture the current running through her veins regardless. 

The fucking torturous in and out of his cock— taunting her, languidly pounding her for what feels like an eternity— she can’t think. She’s in the water but she feels under it, too, foggy and pent up. She just wants to cum—

“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna—” 

“—Stevie!” 

She breaks through the sluggish pleasure into electric and all consuming waves, head falling against the wall as his hips stutter against hers, pumping once, then twice, before falling still. Each time, she clenches harder, babbling something gritty and foul and incomprehensible. Something along the lines of holy fucking shit baby but its blurred with searing, pulsing pleasure.

There’s stars behind her eyes and steam in her nose as he falls against her chest, sopping hair tickling her hypersensitive skin. Him pulling feels like what two exposed wires touching must— all sparky and hot. It’s too much. 

“Mmm, careful baby,” she mumbles and he chuckles. 

“Of course.” 

The rest is truly a lull. Steve doesn’t bother gathering their clothes, only her, carrying her limp body to the bed and carefully setting her under the covers, dripping and all, before joining her. If she weren’t so sleepy, she would have scolded him. But she is and her eyes are refusing to stay open, let alone give him that look. It’s all she can do = to seek his warm skin once more, slithering against his body and rooting herself there. 

Cauterized, or something like it. 

[herotome]

Hello!! I hope you're having a wonderful day and that you're taking care of yourself! I discovered Herotome like...I'd say a little under a week now? And I love it! It's been so fun replaying it and trying to get all the achievements. But honestly, it also got me out of my art block that I've had for months now???? It's been fun drawing my own MC portrait and it just...idk it feels nice, so thank you!

I do have one question which I'm not 100% sure its been touched on or if it goes into spoiler territory buuuuuut. In the scene where we meet Dart for the first time we have the option to say "Don't talk back to Griffin!" (Or something like that) to which Dart goes "She knows?" I was just curious if we'll ever get to find out what they both meant!! I'm so curious...

But!! On the off chance this could be a spoiler then I have a second question! How would the ROs respond to MC (established relationship) if she sent a pic of animals being cute (like two cats cuddling) and being like "us?"

Once again I hope you have an amazing day/afternoon/night if you aren't already. I'm looking forward to this game's journey!

Omg pleaseeee show me your MC, I wanna see everyone's MCs, I'll put it in #Herotome MC 😭😭😭

I was just curious if we'll ever get to find out what they both meant!

Ah... yes and no. It's one of those things where.. after a certain reveal, you might connect some dots while replaying the game to figure out what they meant. But if you ask me again after the reveal (which won't be for quite some time) I'll tell you straight up lol.

It should come up in Griffin's route.

Now, as for two animals cuddling....

Warden: "Which one am I"

Griffin: Replies with two lions going at it and says "us"

Then double texts with "unless?"

Mia: "omggggg" sends hearts and vomiting emojis and then reciprocates with a similarly adorable picture of two cuddling animals.

Dart: "lol"

Jade: photoshops both your faces on top of the animals', like this

[marchiveeee]

HSL episode 12 is so unhinged/chaotic (?) [a long post with many screenshots yayyy]

As you guys might know, we can get up to 6 illustrations on episode 12, so A LOT happens. Some of those things are very laughable, but others are not so much... I'll talk about everything in order of occurrence.

!!!: I'm sorry if "unhinged" or "chaotic" is not the right word for what I'm trying to say. although I'm confident enough in English, it's still not my 1st language. btw, i tried to post this 3 times and something always goes wrong, I'm stressed, so I'll be really happy with an interaction

btw again, if you're brazilian and would like to see this in Portuguese on Twitter or here, please let me know!!!

Mrs. Shermansky being toxic af and the exact opposite of how a good educator should act [in my opinion]

So... I get that she was worried about Candy and Castiel getting lost. But if you really think telling a teenager that the only thing they have ever done is to cause trouble is a good way to advert/encourage them to do the right thing next time is the best approach, please rethink your ways.

2. Mr. Faraize being a sweetheart, he is such a nice teacher

I'm not saying that to be a nice teacher you have to sugarcoat everything all the time and just not scold your students at all. But Mr. Faraize was so nice about it all, he just seemed happy/relieved to know his students were well and safe.

Side [angry] comment about episode 11: Bro, that race was so unorganized!!!! The least the school should have done was provide extra maps in case of accidents like the one that happened with Candy and the LI. Mr. Faraize was wrong too, he shouldn't have let Candy and the LI [in my case, Castiel] proceed after hearing that we had been fkn lost bc we lost the map and we were just wandering until we found the right track. UGH... If that happened irl with my little brother or idk any kid that happens to be in my life, I'd be so furious... ANYWAYS!

3. Born to be a star

He is loving the attention!

4. Violet, as always, being the most precious being in that school. [I'm sorry about the screenshot I used, I forgot to take others]

She's just so sweet and adorable, I want to hug her. YOU'RE NOT DUMB, BABYYYY.

4. Armin's reaction to Alexy's secret admirer

before the declaration:

after the declaration:

Honestly, I was just so happy to see that Armin didn't out his brother when he heard that a girl was interested on him. I didn't remember the details of this scene bc I was probably 12 y/o when i first played it.

5. Candy being paranoid that half of the boys at SA will turn out to be gay/not straight

This girl cracks me up istg... and why the fuck

she was just so worried to ask Castiel bc she thought he would get angry. Girl, we don't do fragile masculinity here.

6. Candy goes completely sidetracked on her CasLys fanfic just to check Lys's tattoo and witnessing one of the biggest bombs of MCL

I didn't get many screenshots from this part, because it's just sad when you know what it's all about in the end... but yeah instead of spying on Lys, Candy ends up seeing Nath's bruised body and is also caught by him.

Someone has probably done this already idrk, but I'm gathering some screenshots of moments that foreshadowed that something was just not right at Nath's and Amber's house... It'll probably take a while for me to post, but I'll try.

7. Nath being for real

He was so right for calling her dumb!!!! I think I was ranting about this on Twitter recently when I replayed the beach episode…

8. Lys’s reaction to the whole story [an icon]

I regret not taking screenshots sooner, but I was just too distracted laughing my ass off! There literally was about 2/3 scenes of just: 

Lys: 🤨[...] Candy: [Doesn’t know what to say/says something stupid] Lys: 🤨[...] Candy: [Doesn’t know what to say/says something stupid

Again, she doesn’t say anything [to get the image you need to go for this choice]

And then he shoes you his tattoo! Bro, he was SO COOL about it! If Candy had just asked nicely… But no, she has to complicate everything omg istg 

I still laughed a lot tho, I think at some point in this episode Cas said that this trait of Candy and her need to know and talk about everything is what makes her fun. I agree with him. She is annoying sometimes but definitely entertaining for the gossipers.

9. May the fanfic continue

Insert some dialogues here: Basically Cas sees Candy near them listening to their conversation and he asks what’s up. Candy approaches them and is like “uhhh…. Are you……….?” Then Castiel says:

For my mind’s sake let’s just imagine that the “offended” was not for “I’m offended you thought I was gay”, but for “I’m offended that you thought I’m dating Castiel when he’s not on my level of gentlemanliness and when I deserve so much more than this grumpy angsty tomato head” (don’t get me wrong, I love Castiel and I’d die for him, but it’s either that or think of a homophobic Lys, which I don’t think it’s the case for him)

10. Castiel shoots his 29482904 shot with Candy, but she’s stupid

Actually, one thing that I like about this scene is that it leaves open the interpretation of Castiel’s sexuality. Saying that he likes girls doesn’t necessarily mean that he is straight. I love to see that. And disclaimer: if you prefer to think that Cas is, in fact, straight, go ahead. That’s not a problem. He is not a real person and we’re allowed to imagine and speculate things, so this is just a headcanon of mine that he might be bi/pan or just simply not straight.

11. Amber and Kentin kiss

That alone is just unhinged and chaotic. I don’t need to say much. 

BUT I’M SO GLAD HE IS BACK!!! He’s gonna be a little shit for a while, because I think my Candy lost some points with him bc of a wrong choice after he left, but that’s fine! I MISSED HIM!!!

----

I hope you had fun with this little throwback!

[witchysquirrel]

Epiphany

Chapter Thirteen

Ravenna found her way to her room, immediately ridding herself of the gown that felt restrictive and hot now that she was at home. She changed into a pair of black lounge pants and a black sweater, leaving her jewelry in place out of laziness. The healer felt like she could hardly keep her head on straight. At least she’d have good news to give Rhysand if Fetrin had indeed told her the truth about his stance on the slavery happening on the Continent. 

Maybe she’d ask Rhys about her dynamic with Cassian, too. She trusted his opinion… most of the time.

The anxiety lost out to the exhaustion at some point, and Ravenna slept long and hard. She stayed in bed the entire next day in addition, just because she couldn’t bring herself to leave her bedroom. 

She awoke the next morning with a decent headache, and dragged herself to the bathroom. Beginning to draw a bath, she turned the faucet all the way right, then moved to the medicine cabinet above the sink. She poured herself a small plastic cup full of a tonic she kept on hand for this type of headache, and threw it back. It left a metallic taste in her mouth, but worked nearly 100% of the time. Stripping from her clothes, Ravenna settled into the warmth of the tub and closed her eyes.

Her mind wandered back to the night prior, flashing from Fetrin’s words, how sure he had been in what he’d told her; then to Cassian, the image of him spinning her around with the biggest smile on his face etched in her memory forever. She’d prefer to just replay the last image over and over again, and avoid thinking about any other context. She resolved to ask Rhys his opinion when she saw him later today. She needed someone else’s perspective to even everything out.

-

Ravenna wore a black velvet gown that fell just above her ankles, inky curls falling loose behind her shoulders. She made her way quickly to Rhysand’s study, hoping to avoid talking to anyone else on her way there. When she arrived, he glanced up at her from where he sat at his desk, puzzling over a lengthy piece of correspondence, which he set aside as she hastily closed the door behind her. 

“How did your night end up going, my spy in training?”

She took a seat in the plush armchair across from his desk. “It was mostly good, honestly,” she said. “I don’t think we need to worry about the Dawn Court, if everything he told me was true.”

Rhys nodded. “Good. You held up okay emotionally?”

“Mostly, yeah,” Ravenna answered, biting the inside of her cheek.

“Mostly,” Rhys repeated, looking at her with curiosity.

“Fetrin said something that kind of threw me for a loop,” she said, quietly. Rhys continued looking at her, waiting for her to fill the silence that followed. He narrowed his eyes.

“Spit it out, Ravenna.”

“He thought Cassian and I were mates.”

Another weighty silence followed, Ravenna attempting to read the expressions on her friend's angled face. 

“What made him say that?” Rhys asked.

“He said it after watching us dance together,” she said plainly. “And he seemed very sure about it.” 

“That’s interesting,” he replied, eyes trained to his desk once again.

“I thought so too,” she said, watching him.

“Well? Have you felt the bond?” he asked, resting an elbow on the surface in front of him and looking at her carefully.

Ravenna blinked. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” 

“I don’t know what it’s supposed to feel like,” Ravenna replied curtly. 

“I suppose I don’t either,” he answered. She rolled her eyes.

“You’re being weird. Tell me what you know,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest.

“I think you should talk to Cassian about it, not me. I really don’t know anything,” he said, shrugging smugly. 

“I brought it up because I wanted your opinion, actually,” Ravenna shot back, leaning forward in her chair. 

“I mean I will say, it has seemed like you guys have gotten closer recently,” Rhys answered, hands raised in surrender.

“Was that so hard?” she half-joked. “I feel like we’ve gotten closer too, since we started speaking mind to mind.”

“Since you started speaking –” Rhys cut himself off, just before the point of clapping a hand over his open mouth like a cartoon character. “No, you know, that’s really interesting. My honest opinion, Ravenna, as your friend and High Lord, is that you should talk to Cassian.”

“What if I don’t want to… ruin things? And he has Celeste. I just don’t know.”

Rhys paused, gaze returning to Ravenna. “He and Celeste broke up last week. I thought you knew already.”

Ravenna felt her stomach drop. “I didn’t know,” she said, quietly, looking back to Rhys. She shook her head. “That doesn’t change anything.” And with that she rose, leaving the way she came, the door swinging in her wake. Rhys rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, impressed with himself for not giving in to her questions, allowing it to be Cassian’s responsibility.

Ravenna left, heading straight for Mor’s side of the house. She flung open the door of Mor’s suite to find it in complete disarray, with Mor in the center of it all snoring softly. Ravenna stepped over out of place furniture and a stray glass bottle, until she reached Mor, shaking her awake. Mor jolted awake, but relaxed when she realized it was Ravenna. 

“I need your companionship,” Ravenna huffed, resting back on her knees. “I was going to say I need someone to get drunk with, but you look like you don’t need that right now.”

“No, no! Those bottles are from the night of the ball. I honestly just haven’t cleaned up yet,” she snorted, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, although it was nearly 6pm. “I’ll never turn down the proposition of Rita’s.”

Mor changed into a casual midnight blue gown that plunged so low, Ravenna actually checked to make sure everything was covered. Ravenna put on light makeup, flipped her hair a few times, and called it good. Rhys offered to fly them into town, which they gladly accepted, and Ravenna wondered if he was pitying her. They arrived at Rita’s, each ordering a glass of wine, and picked a couple of seats at the end of the bar. 

“Tell me everything about the ball,” Mor said, bringing her elbow to the bar and resting her chin in her hand. 

Ravenna sipped from her glass slowly. “It was fine,” she said. “I actually had a fine time with Fetrin, it was nice to talk with him again.”

“Oh good! So he wasn’t a complete asshole?” 

“Surprisingly no! Only a slight asshole.” The two laughed in unison.

“Well that’s great, Rav. I’m glad it wasn’t entirely awful,” she replied, her features soft. 

“Speaking of which, I didn’t see you at all after the first twenty minutes of the ball,” Ravenna said, sitting up slightly and raising an eyebrow at her friend. 

“I was around,” she reassured. “I did bring someone home fairly early but I was mostly there.”

Ravenna giggled. “So you had a good night, I take it?”

Mor nodded, taking another huge gulp from her glass of red wine, before something caught her eye behind Ravenna, towards the front door. “Oh there’s Cassian, let me-“

“No!” Ravenna yell-whispered, eyes wide as she smacked down the hand Mor was raising to wave him over. Mor’s eyes widened at Ravenna’s behavior, but she stopped what she was doing. Mor was surprised at her outburst, as was Ravenna herself, and she covered her face with her hands. 

“Do you wanna tell me what in the hell that was about?” Mor asked, brows raised at her friend. 

“I really don’t want to talk about it, but I know I should,” Ravenna replied, grimacing slightly. 

“Okay… spill then,” Mor answered, and flagged down the bartender. “We’ll take a bottle of Merlot to share.” Mor joked about wondering if they had any larger wine glasses, and Ravenna offered to ask for her. 

“So anyways,” Ravenna finally said over the din. “Fetrin was convinced that Cassian and I are mates.” She said it all in one breath, letting the words hang weightless in the air. Mor’s eyebrows raised once more, her face morphing into a huge smile. Ravenna immediately began shaking her head.

“Oh come on! This is a best case scenario, Ravenna,” Mor mused excitedly, as Ravenna continued shaking her head. 

“No.”

“Why not?! I love the idea of you two together, I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of it before! Ravenna. Please.”

“I have no idea if he’s actually my mate,” Ravenna answered. “Or if he feels anything even remotely for me.”

“I mean you did tell me about his voice in your head,” Mor shrugged. “That’s not very common for someone who’s not entirely Daemati. Could be the mating bond.”

Ravenna hadn’t considered it that way, her chest feeling tight as she realized the truth to Mor’s words. She drank more wine and tried to take a deep breath, to calm down. 

“I’m telling you, this is such a good thing. Why are you so scared?”

“We have such a good friendship. I don’t want to ruin everything.”

“Ravenna. The friendship part doesn’t have to end,” Mor said, “you get to be friends and have crazy sex. It’s the best of both worlds. And I’m sorry to say this about your potential mate, but also, happy for you when I say that their little ‘wingspan’ jokes are absolutely true.”

Ravenna couldn’t help but crack at that, laughing with Mor and taking another gulp of wine. 

“Maybe you’re right,” Ravenna replied, sighing. “I guess I’m scared of all these hypotheticals I’ve created in my head. They’re all hypotheticals where I get hurt.”

“You’re scared of getting hurt,” Mor repeated back to her. “I don’t think it’s unreasonable. I just don’t want you to miss out for fear of something that hasn’t happened yet.”

The healer looked at the blonde next to her with gratitude. She was so thankful for Mor; her ability to level out Ravenna’s anxieties was nearly unmatched. Ravenna needed Mor’s confidence, more of her willingness to believe she deserved something good. 

“I still don’t know what to do next,” Ravenna said. “I’m not sure what the bond snapping is meant to feel like... There has been one time… or maybe a couple times, that I thought I felt something, when I’d been, uhm, close to him. But I got scared, and I left.”

“Replicate the conditions,” Mor said with a devious smile. “And then give into the feeling instead of running away from it.”

“You’re right, I guess. I should talk to him.”

“Good thing he is quite literally across the room.”

Ravenna sighed. “I was thinking more like tomorrow, the next day, something like that.”

“Just do it! He’s literally right there.”

Ravenna chugged the rest of her wine, took a deep breath and then turned from the bar to face the rest of Rita’s. Her vision was slightly fuzzy in the dim lighting, but she made out familiar wings across from where she and Mor sat, but to the left. 

“I don’t know if I can do it,” she said, face wrought with worry. 

“You can!” Mor urged with a smile, nudging her off of her barstool and onto her feet. It was the push she needed to propel her in Cassian’s direction. Before she knew it she was crossing the floor, black velvet swishing at her ankles as she walked. Cassian was standing against a far wall, arms mostly crossed in front of him, holding a beer in one hand as he mostly listened to the males around him talk. His eyes softened when he saw her approaching, and a small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. 

“Hi,” she said.

“Hey,” he echoed. 

“Can we talk for a second?” 

“Yeah, of course.”

Cassian followed her through Rita’s until they reached the corridor where the bathrooms were, and then they branched off into another hallway adjacent, stopping before a door marked ‘Employees Only’. 

Cassian almost looked amused, watching her as she turned to face him again, waiting for her to speak first. She looked up towards the cracks in the ceiling to avoid his face as she started talking. 

“I feel like our relationship has changed, recently,” she started, attempting to keep her voice steady. “I feel closer to you.”

He hummed a little, contemplating her words. “I agree,” he said, swallowing. Ravenna watched his adam’s apple bob as he did so. 

“I think…” she began, taking another breath. “I don’t know..” she said again, stuttering. “I just wondered what you thought about that, I guess.”

“About the fact that we’re mates,” he said bluntly, Ravenna shocked to hear him voice what she hadn’t been able to. 

“So you know,” she replied, quietly, cheeks flushing. 

“I suspected, for a while there. Until the bond snapped for me,” he added. “Then I really knew.” She met his eyes then, their soft hazel burning into her with an intensity she hadn’t expected. She wet her lips with her tongue, heartbeat pounding in her ears. 

“I’m worried,” she said, after a moment. “I really love our friendship. I don’t want to change anything.”

He took a half-step closer to her. “We’re still friends,” he said, quieter than before. “We’ll always be friends.”

She bit the inside of her cheek, heart continuing to flutter madly in her chest. “What did it feel like?” She asked him. “When the bond snapped?”

He smiled a little bit. “It felt like something opened up in me,” he began, touching the base of his sternum. “Like deep inside, and it wanted to reach out for you. I ignored it the first time, I don’t think I realized what it was. I accepted it the second time, fell into it, that’s an entirely different feeling.”

Ravenna was quiet. “I think I’ve felt it,” she said softly. “But I’ve been too scared to accept it.”

“I know it’s scary, and I know I’m acting really normal right now but I absolutely fucking freaked out at first, too,” Cassian said.

“What did it feel like once you accepted it?”

He broke his gaze from her, flushing just slightly in the cheeks as he scratched the back of his neck. “There’s no way for me to say it nicely, honestly. I wanted to take you right there, and everywhere.”

She turned pink at his words, laughing nervously. “I shouldn’t have asked, truly, I knew the answer.” Cassian chuckled, shoving his hands in his pockets. Ravenna took another deep breath in through her nose, exhaling slowly before looking back at him again. “I’m willing to take the risk,” she said. “It’s really hard to ignore this thing, believe it or not.”

Cassian took another step closer to her, close enough that she had to look up at him a little. “Are you sure?” Her heart pounding in her chest, Ravenna hesitantly closed the distance between them, lifting her arms and snaking them around his neck. His hands found her waist, settling in lightly. She looked up at him, breathing in the scent of him, that feeling beginning to grow in her chest once more, spreading its warmth through her. She nodded, a shiver of warmth traveling down her spine. “Positive? Once we start I’m not going to be able to resist you anymore.” 

She nodded a second time.

-

Epiphany Masterlist

[miilkyrolls]

okay fine, Murder at homecoming, YOU WIN

so i finally finished MaH after putting off continuing past chapter 1 since like...february and, i almost used this book as a diamond mine cause i preemptively was like "this looks lame 😒"

... i came, i laughed, i gasped, i yelled, i cried and i left... then i CAME BACK BECAUSE HOLY MOTHER OF REPLAY-ABILITY BATMAN🥲

but no this book hits right where it needed too. I know one of the biggest upsets people have with MaH is A) the villain being guessable and B) not solving Perdita's disappearance and sorta C/ B.2) it being a standalone. and imo for A, that's up to you to feel that way. imo cause choices is a visual form of content, it's kinda hard to have genuinely surprising "twist" villains cause the visuals already clue you into who done-did it unless they pull the twist straight out they ass(i feel this way about movies and shows too. the only way surprises genuinely get me is in books or podcasts, so non visual entertainment)

and B/C, i actually think NOT solving perdita's story AND making it a standalone was actually very mature of PB (first and possibly last time i'll ever say that in this day and age 💀). it's possible they might've made it their next teen drama series if they had the budget. But unfortunately it's honestly realistic. unfortunately a lot of women go missing and rarely do they get found alive and in a short amount of time (esp if you have as a bipoc mc/ perdita). it's an extremely tragic cookie crumble that unfortunately a lot of mysteries in our lives often take us our entire lives to solve and a lot of them we'll never solve in our lifetime. it's a great paradox / parallel to gabbie's death. it took us all of say 4/5 months (cause in the US, most schools go on winter break in late December) to solve with justice being fairly swift, fair, and harsh but unfortunately a lot of victims don't get their day for a long while, if ever. it's a healthy ying and yang of enjoying fictional justice but it being unrealistic with acknowledging the devastation of losing real victims while acknowledging those lost and their unsung stories that we should never completely give up on their days to come. (ofc however, i hc that perdita is still alive and uncovered corruption in the city and knew that making her family deal with legal repercussions would make their lives more difficult and be ostracized by the elites of Beachwood, so she just left and changed her identity. i like to think she did it also cause MC deserved to have a normal teenhood and not be ousted for her actions)

also i love the open and candid conversations around the treatment of queer children, bipoc mistreatment , misogyny, sa and grief. idk why but the ability to choose if you'd experienced homophobia/ transphobia based on your pronouns and who you've romanced, and tyler talking about thinking he was straight before meeting us (i had a masc body) idk why but i like that touch. i feel like PB kinda grazes over the aspect of being queer / trans and the concept of love, coming out, and society acceptance when your same sex romancing/ nonbinary so it's real shocking when they actually..idk address that thing😭. it's nice to have characters acknowledging their sexuality rather then just be automatically playersexual and everyone around them is just immediately accepting/ suddenly bigotry just seems to evaporate for mc's life/ society

also also, WE CAN BE POLY AND LIKE ITS CALLED POLY AND EVERYONE IS HAPPY AND THE LI WE DON'T CHOOSE AREN'T FORCED ONTO US/ GIVEN AS A OPTION

smaller things: i like the heavy usage of sound effects, idk why but i do. i like the flashbacks into mc's and perdita's relationship, the mix of free and paid clues that are non linear, STEVIE (yes she needs her own category)

overall: 9.2/10. i really like this book, it's going on my personal shelf next to the likes of crimes of passion (minus proposal...), Queen B, big sky country, blood bound, immortal desires 1, and with every heartbeat for my good book shelf

[trumai-jpg]

A Beginners Guide to Night 8 in FNAF 1

Hi! Okay so recently with the movie and Help Wanted 2 I've been sorta coming back into my old FNAF phase, so me and a friend decided to replay the older games - 1-6 mainly and then maybe the others if we were up to it idk - but after beating Night 6 in the first game I was talking to my friend about the night Scott added after FNAF 3 released and apparently people just don't know about this...?

Honestly I'm surprised people aren't more aware of this (they even done a GT live stream about it) but it makes sense since nit a lot of Big YouTubers went back to play it. You can unlock Night 8 by inputting '2023' in the custom night selection screen. From there it'll take you to a normal 'Custom Night' but with the addition of Springtrap from the third game and none of the other animatronics!

Springtrap will always start the night just out of sight from Cam 7. His AI is set to around 11-13 at the start of the night but by the end will reach 20. The gimmick with him is he's (typically) hiding somewhere in the camera but luckily I went into the files and got the images without any of the UI or static! He can go other directions (for example: Cam 7 to Cam 18) but this is usually how it goes.

What's important about going against Springtrap is you need to keep a constant watch on him. If you hold a camera open that he's on for 3-4 seconds you'll be able to either hold him back or straight up make him go back to a previous camera. (if you choose to just do nothing and wait by the doors he'll rush to you and jumpscare you after about 40 seconds of inactivity.)

CAM 7 - Restrooms

You can usually point Springtrap out by his eyes, and with this usually being his starting point you should Hopfully be able to catch him in Cam 7 hiding in the boys bathroom. His eyes will usually point him out but the static can make it difficult.

CAM 4A - Right Hallway

This is probably one of the hardest spots to find him in. It's practically impossible to see him in here under normal means BUT he'll always make his way through the kitchen first, and like Chica he'll make some noise when he does, so if you're quick to it you can catch him here after and push him back.

CAM 4B - Right Corner

If you see Springtrap here then he'll be just one stop outside of your office, and he doesn't give you much time to breath either. At his first movement opportunity he'll make his way to your office but I'll get to that in a bit.

CAM 5 - Workroom

After reaching one of your doors, Springtrap's position will reset to either the restrooms, or here. There's actually two positions he can have in this room. Catching him in the doorframe will send him back inside the room at his next movement opportunity but he barely stays there for even a couple seconds so it's pretty hard to catch him.

CAM 1B - Dining Area

He's pretty hard to miss here, but what's important is that he can move here from either the Restrooms or the Work Room and ge can change his route from either of them.

CAM 3 - Supply Closet

This one isn't that complicated. He'll come here after leaving the dining room if he decides to come to your left door.

CAM 2B - Left Corner

Springtrap will up and ignore CAM 2A, and go straight to the corner. If he's here you should follow the same advice as the Right Corner since it's pretty straight forward from here.

The Office

Sooner or later you're going to stumble and he'll make his way to your office, but fortunately because of his glowing eyes you technically never have to use lights to see Springtrap. that aside, you should close the door immediately if you see him through either window.

If you don't manage to notice him or close your doors, then you'll have one more opportunity (albeit an easy one to miss.) If you put your cameras down and see Springtrap's eyes then close the door straight away. Any other movement like lights or the camera will cause him to jumpscare you and end your night.

Past that you should be all set! Just manage your power and try to get through the night. I should say, although the other animatronics are out of commission for the night, there's still a minor chance that Yellow Bear or Sparky can make an appearance on certain cameras. Just don't stare at them too long or put your camera down too quick, so have fun and good luck beating Night 8!

[basu-shokikita]

Dethentines 2024 Day 2

Inspired by a Classic Romance Movie

I was having a hard time coming up with a movie for today's prompt because I'm not much for romantic movies...until my friend reminded me of Twilight, which is both cursed and a formative movie for me. Additionally, I had already thought of a Skwistok Twilight AU so this was the perfect chance for it. 😜

I'm doing a re-imagining of Bella and Edward's infamous first meeting because it's straight up one of my favorite scenes of the movie, it's just too funny. So, anyway, enjoy whatever this is!! 😂😂

Toki reluctantly walked into the classroom, unsure if he had the right one. When he saw the tubes and all the other scientific parafernalia, he let out a sigh of relief. This was definitely biology class.

“Oh, hey!” A middle-aged balding man approached him. He looked friendly and shook his hand right away. “You’re the new kid, right? I’m Mr. Ramirez, your new biology teacher.”

“Ah!” Toki didn’t expect the physical contact, though he wasn’t against it. Mr. Ramirez had a warm hand. “Nice to meets you Mrs. Raysmires, ams Toki-”

“We saved you a spot, Toki!” Mr. Ramirez pointed at an empty . “You can sit right next to Mr. Skwigelf, I’m sure he’ll be friendly. Right, Mr. Skwigelf?” Before receiving any kind of response, he turned to Toki. “Welcome to the class, Mr. Wartooth.” He said and finally let go of Toki.

When Toki glanced at his table partner with hesitation, the words from earlier replayed in his mind.

That’s Skwisgaar Skwigelf. Hottest boy at the school. Probably the most arrogant one, too. He is completely unfriendly and won’t let anyone that isn’t one of his weird little friends approach him. Don’t even try being nice to him, he’ll totally ignore you.

Toki bit his bottom lip, self-absorbed in rumination. Suddenly, he felt a breeze from behind him and turned to look at the fan pointing at him. When he returned his attention to the table, he saw that the Skwisgaar guy had covered his nose and mouth, glaring at Toki with unbridled anger. His free hand was tightly clenched on the table, and he looked away with a deep frown.

Panicked, Toki sniffed his own armpit, wondering if he smelled bad. Okay, he should’ve probably remembered to use deodorant before leaving for school, but it wasn’t so bad. He still remembered to shower this morning and everything. Maybe this person was a neat freak or something.

Trying not to feel affected, Toki walked to his table without paying too much attention. However, the minute he sat on his chair, the guy recoiled against his corner. As if Toki’s presence was too much to bear. That was kind of rude and honestly pretty uncalled for, even for a neat freak.

And yet, when he turned to at least give a judgemental stare to his table partner, he found him scowling back at him. Pitch black eyes pierced into his soul, trembling so faintly that Toki wouldn’t have noticed if it wasn’t for the shaking fingers on the table. His lips, his nose, his eyebrows, even his sharp cheeks…every feature on his face was filled with pure disgust towards Toki. The disheveled golden hair only served as some kind of curtain to present the most disdainful stare Toki had received in his life. 

Despite his better efforts, Toki felt his eyes sting a little. Everyone had been pretty nice to him so far, nobody had bullied him or made fun of his looks, so he should be happy. He should be happy his first day had been going so well. And yet, this hostility was tearing him apart. What had he done to this man he didn’t even know to elicit such a reaction from him? Should he look for another table? Should he leave this class? Should he…

And then, the blond pushed the paper sheet towards Toki. Carefully, as if he was trying his best not to come in contact with Toki, but still. Somehow, that gesture made him relieved. At least, he wasn’t being kicked out, no matter how much this guy seemed to despise him.

“Thank yous…” He said quietly and the guy just closed his eyes almost dramatically in response. It was a little funny, but maybe he needed help. “Um…” Toki tried to move closer. “Ams you okays?”

Skwisgrab opened his eyes at once and stared at Toki like he was crazy, shrinking against his corner like a wounded animal. He opened his mouth but no seconds came out for a few seconds. Then, he tried again. “Don’ts.” His voice was deep, serious and honestly pretty attractive.

“Okays!” Toki said before moving back with his chair. 

“Alright, kids, settle down!” Mr. Ramirez exclaimed, clasping his hands together. “Class is about to begin! Today, we’re studying…”

Toki tried to pay attention for a good whole minute before all the scientific terms got lost on him. He had never been the best with biology anyway. As subtle as he could, he took another glance at Skwisargs. 

The guy was still evidently repulsed, although he was making an effort to conceal it while he listened to the class. And it made Toki be able to see his face better. They weren’t kidding, Skwisgarp was really attractive with the rockstar mane, the long eyelashes, sharp features and full lips. Even his white teeth slightly peeking from under his upper lip were pearly white and…was that a fang?

Skwisgruel glared at him and Toki turned away, feeling his cheeks heat up. He tried to listen to the teacher, but the way Skwisgare crumpled the paper was infinitely more interesting and he couldn’t help stealing another glance at him. Long and slender fingers were wrapped around the abused paper sheet and Toki wondered how someone's skin could be so pale.

When he raised his eyes, he found the guy grimacing at him though it wasn’t just disgust in his eyes anymore, the confusion was apparent too. Whereas before he seemed intimidating and almost menacing, now he appeared weirdly cornered by Toki’s curiosity. And, in all fairness, it’s not like Toki could explain it either, so he pretended to pay attention to some random spot on his table.

The class went excruciatingly slow, with Toki fighting, and repeatedly failing, not to gaze at the handsome and bizarre stranger next to him and said stranger looking off put by him. By the time the bell rang, it felt like a million years had gone by, and Skwisgark dashed away with his bag in a hurry without even letting Mr. Ramirez finish. Toki observed the worn out black boots he was wearing, as his heels disappeared through the door frame. By the time he stood outside the door to take a peak, Skwisgerm’s silhouette was nowhere in sight.

Dangerous, was the first word Toki thought of, when trying to define this person. Like this was the kind of guy his parents would warn him against. And, yet, Toki felt an unshakeable need to know more about him.

Just who was he?