#honestly best advice because i have finals coming up next week

[kittybug99]

tiktok has ruined facebook for me. they always get me with those stupid reels now and every time I got to check to see if my friends/loved ones have posted anything that I want to see I get sucked in by those stupid videos. I'm always like, oh I'll just watch this one that looks silly and cute and then I keep clicking and I realize I've been watching for an hour. SO i say "oh i should stop after this next one" and then I don't and then it's been 2 hours and now I need to start thinking about what to eat for lunch and don't have time to sit down and focus on homework anymore. and then after lunch i start working on homework and then I'm like, oh i just sat down, let me check facebook real quick just catch up if anythings happened. and facebook has gotten very insidious about ads as well these days, i have to scroll through like 10 different ads just to see a single post from someone I actually know/follow on facebook. and of course I will end up scrolling past those stupid reels and click on one. I tried to train myself out of it. I tried to train myself to click on one and then immediately close it. It didn't work. Anyway, i remember during the 2020 election I got paid to participate in a survey that required me to not use facebook for 4 months. and I think that that was like, the happiest I'd been. I mean, I would have my partner check my page to make sure that no one tagged me in anything I should see (family photos, pics of my nibling, important family updates, etc)

anyway, short story long I installed an extension (limit, i think) that will limit you to a preset number of minutes for any website and it has some set in right away like facebook, reddit, etc. the issue with this is that it's wayyyy to easy for me to turn off. Also the presets were un-deletable. and it considered literally anything that wasn't google itself to be a distraction (even Canvas... the school app). so the best I could do was set the limit really high for every website that wasn't a distraction. this failed because all too often i would say "oh i deserve a lil break" and disable to extension to check facebook for "just 5 min" which would immediately turn into 4 hours of reels.

I realize that I should probably state that I deleted facebook from my phone like 2 years ago because this was an issue on my phone. Like I would open my phone and immediately go to facebook, so i deleted it from my phone and from thence forward facebook was exclusively a computer experience.

Anyway, I've looked into countless ways to disable reels from facebook, but every blog claiming solutions says that reels don't exist on desktop mode, so just delete facebook from the phone and only use facebook on your computer. yeah I already did that buddy. years ago. but reels in fact do exist on desktop mode. anyway, i installed a new extension that just fully blocks facebook completely between hours that I set (1am-midnight), and I didn't look into how to change the hours or disable it.

I didn't realize how much of my facebook checking was just muscle memory. every time i even slightly lose focus on my homework i just open a tab and type "f" without thinking

now i get a little blank screen that says "facebook is disabled between the hours of 1-24, which snaps me out of it, and I can usually re-focus pretty quickly.

Anyway, everyone on this planet who has been subjected to whatever dystopian media thing we have going on has had their attention span stolen from them and we deserve better

[kourabiedes]

I'm not here to grind a political or social axe. I'm just here to tell a short story, about a normal person trying to navigate the American medical establishment. Here is some evidence. You may draw your own conclusions.

So I've had a migraine for a month.

That's not hyperbole, mind. It has been a month since this started. A month of the entire side of my head pulsing with pain, worse whenever I look at light which is always because I do digital art and all that.

Now, I've had migraines all my damn life. I know the drill. I have a preventative medicine that keeps me from having more than one a month or so, and I have a "rescue" medicine meant to stop the ones that do start. I have a nice dark room to rest in when it starts, I have blindfolds, I have ice packs -- I know how to handle these, is the point. So, for about the first two weeks, I did just that. I hit this sucker with everything that worked before and did my best to wait it out. Yes, I delayed getting care, because it was a problem I was already familiar with and assumed was normal for me.

Then, a week ago, it stopped responding to my rescue medication. Entirely stopped. Alarmed, I went to the ER. They hit me with a fairly standard migraine cocktail (so they said anyway -- don't ask me what it was because I honestly do not remember). Killed the pain almost right away and they give me some advice about what to do next and sent me home.

It was back in sixteen hours.

ER again. Same cocktail, same result. I'm freaked out now, so I call my PCP and schedule an appointment. She fits me into her schedule because she's alarmed too. She gives me a shot of Toradol and that helps, but she notices my blood pressure is reading a little elevated for me and we decide to try a blood pressure medication. Okay, cool, I'm down, high blood pressure runs in the family and it can definitely give you migraines if untreated. We start this medicine and she prescribes me a new rescue medication, giving me one pill to try while waiting for insurance to okay the prescription. This rescue medicine works, putting me back in control of the pain. Cool, thinks I, I just have to get through a couple weeks while the blood pressure medicine settles in, and if we're right, the migraine will finally let go.

Today, I discover that insurance would only okay ten pills of this medicine, because I have had the other rescue medication refilled recently for... obvious reasons. Ten pills, and if I want more, I have to wait like forty days or something.

Do you know how many of these pills I have to take a day to keep the migraine at bay? Two.

I have five days of relief -- four, now -- before I go right back to the same ER level pain, unless I am exceedingly lucky with this blood pressure medicine.

The ER did no imaging. I'm not sure if they even could. My PCP put in an order for an MRI when I saw her, which was a week ago, and that request has not yet left the insurance company.

A migraine is not just a headache, like you get after overindulging or staying up too late. A migraine alters your mental state. It can come with physical symptoms beyond head pain -- mine likes to manifest itself with dark spots in my vision, for example, which can ruin a day real fast -- and sometimes they even come with nasty mental symptoms.

So... what part of all that upsets you the most? Because, for me, it's knowing I have about four days before I go right back to screaming misery.

Oh, and I have to note, I am considered fairly lucky because the state covers my ass when Medicare won't. Yet here we are all the same.

[bodybahng]

a thousand days with you

seven. red flags 📝

warnings: talks of sa (nothing descriptive), mention of a drunk character, anxiety, cursing, dates and time stamps aren’t important/accurate.

a/n: the emoji is there to remain neutral. in reality it’s a pic with jeongin, but in the au it’s with y/n :)

if you are a minor or an ageless blog and interact with my content, you will be blocked.

main masterlist | au masterlist | prev | next

you paced around the room, your anxiety raising by every second you waited for lino to arrive. he hadn’t said a word about what he needed to tell you, and all different possibilities began swimming in your head.

your overthinking only stopped when he rang the doorbell, and you took a deep breath before walking over and letting him in.

“hey,” he greeted quietly, running a hand through his hair as he sat on your couch. “i really need advice on this.”

“you’re scaring me, what’s going on?” you asked while plopping down next to him, your legs bouncing up and down slightly.

“my ex just texted me,” he started, and you already felt like your whole world was coming apart. “they apologised for everything and want to meet up, but i don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

it honestly shocked you that he came to you with this concern, and not one of his trusting friends that he’s known for longer, specially after the rejection because he liked them instead of you.

he blinked rapidly while starring at you, waiting for any kind of response. he was sure you could see how nervous he was as he swiped his sweaty forehead with the back of his hand. “so?”

“that depends on you, lino. if you still feel something for them, it’s worth a shot. if not, then either meet up to tell them that or say it directly through text. you don’t owe them anything, you’ve been broken up for months.”

he was nodding at your words, brows furrowing as he started pondering. “that’s pretty straightforward thinking, i don’t know why that didn’t occur to me.” he chuckled while looking at you.

you forced a laugh, not really knowing what to say. after a few moments of silence, you saw him getting serious again, this time turning his body more towards you.

“so, do you still not want to tell me about…” he tried, wanting to let you have your own time to decide, but also desperately wanting to get closer to you again and protect you from whatever could have hurt you.

you didn’t know if you were completely ready to tell him, but the look on his face made all doubt go away, and you finally let some of your guards down. “it all happened the night after you told me you liked your ex…”

his expression immediately turned unreadable, almost completely devoid of emotion, and he nodded.

“after that, i downloaded a stupid app and started talking to this person… we really hit it off and i guess i was so touch starved that i looked past all of the red flags.” you paused for a second as the memories came flooding back. “long story short, i got drunk one day, and they were supposed to take care of me. i trusted them, but even after i said i didn’t want to do anything, they kept insisting…”

lino wanted to comfort you, just like he did a couple weeks ago, but he figured it was best not to touch you as you continued your story.

“luckily, something inside of me took over and i was able to push them, get up and run before it went further than a few unwanted kisses and stuff... i ran for so long that eventually i found myself at jinnie’s doorstep.”

“i’m really sorry about that, y/n. that is awful and no one deserves to go through that.”

“i’m just glad it wasn’t worse, even if i can still remember it as if it happened yesterday.” you leaned back into the cushion, taking a deep breath that seemed to release some of the tension in the room. “and that saturday before you picked me up, i was going on a date with a friend of one of my college friends, or at least i thought so.”

“no,” he muttered, hands closing into fists as he guessed the rest. “they lied to you and showed up to the date?”

you only nodded, thumb swiping at a tear that threatened to fall. “that’s why i was scared shitless.”

“i’m really sorry. i know nothing i say can or will make it better, but i’m glad you asked for our help now. do the boys all know about this?”

you shook your head no. “you’re the third person i’ve told. only jinnie and chris know.”

“thank you for trusting me and i’m sorry if i pushed you to talk about it…” he felt guilty, but you shook your head.

“it’s okay, i wanted to tell you, i just… didn’t want you to blame yourself or anything. what happened was that asshole’s fault and not anyone else’s.”

he seemed a little confused at that, but pushed it to the back of his mind. “i know that, don’t worry,” he said with a small, sympathetic smile. “can i…?” he asked with his right arm open, wishing upon every star that you said yes so he could let his hug tell you everything he couldn’t. to his surprise, you tackled him to the ground and held him tightly through tears and giggles.

[goldengleams]

cuddle day | trevor zegras

In which Trevor wants to have a cuddle day.

Some Trevor Zegras fluff to get your week started!

————————————————————————

“Ugh, Trevor let go of me!”

“Why don’t you love me, Y/N?”

“Because you’re a pain in my ass, Z!”

You rolled your eyes at your overdramatic boyfriend, Trevor. He was seated next to you on one of the kitchen barstools, practically in your lap, watching you as you tried to do some work on your laptop. He knew you needed to get work done, but he was having a clingy day where he demanded your cuddles and slouched around in his comfy clothes.

“Z, I gotta do some work, babe,” you said softly. You didn’t get to see this side of Trevor much since he was so busy during the season, so you tried to spend as much time with him as possible.

“Yeah but you’re always working,” Trevor whined.

“Well, that is how I make money, so,” you laughed. “I have to send three more emails and then we can cuddle, okay?”

Trevor just sighed loudly instead of answering you. He trudged off to his bedroom and you could hear him grumbling under his breath about how you should just move into his apartment. Knowing that was a conversation for another day, you went back to typing on your computer.

Jamie made his way into the kitchen to grab a drink from the fridge, having passed Trevor on his way.

“Your boyfriend looks like he needs a cuddle, Y/N,” Jamie teased. He was well aware of Trevor’s moods after living with him for months.

“No, Jamie. Your boyfriend is driving me nuts,” you countered. Jamie just let out a laugh before heading out to the gym.

Typing as fast as you could, you quickly finished up your work and closed your laptop with a relieved sigh. Now, you could finally go cuddle with Trevor.

You grabbed a few snacks from the cupboard and two waters for you and Trevor before heading into his bedroom. He was laying across the bed, scrolling through tik tok when you walked in.

“Oh my god, my girlfriend isn’t just an email machine,” Trevor mused, pushing himself up on his elbows. He had ditched his beanie and his hair was flowing effortlessly. He had his glasses on which made him look even more domestic, and you had to restrain yourself from jumping right at him.

“I wish I didn’t have to be an ‘email machine’, but it’s all for my internship,” you said, setting down all of the snacks and your drinks. “It’ll all be worth it, I think.”

“Yes it will, you’re like, the smartest person I know, babe,” Trevor said. He was the best at reassuring you, all of his compliments and advice rolling off his tongue so easily and honestly.

“Alright, now come cuddle me before I implode.” Trevor rolled onto his back and threw his arms open, waiting for you to climb in next to him.

You obliged, settling in next to him with your head on his chest. He wiggled closer to you, if that was even possible since you were practically on top of each other. His hair started to tickle your face, making you laugh softly.

“Missed you, Y/N,” Trevor sighed. You knew Trevor wanted to spend more time with you, but his schedule in the middle of the season wouldn’t allow it. Any quality time you could get together was spent glued to each other in some activity, whether it be going out or just hanging inside.

“Missed you, too, Z,” you said.

Trevor furrowed his eyebrows, tugging you closer to him. “Well, you should just move in and then you’re always here. Hey, even better, you should just get a job with the Ducks and then you can travel with us!”

You both burst into laughter. “You want me to be a Ducks groupie, Z?”

“I mean you could be a groupie for me and we could–”

“Don’t even finish that sentence, Trevor!”

You climbed up onto his lap as he welcomed you easily. You tucked his hair behind his ear and kissed him sweetly. “You’re crazy,” you mused, as he left a kiss down your jawline.

“Yeah, I know,” Trevor said. “But I’m lucky I get to call you mine.”

For the rest of the afternoon, you stayed right in Trevor’s bed, cuddling and watching your comfort movies. Jamie found you a few hours later, both fast asleep, and smiled to himself at his two close friends.

————————————————————————

Hope you enjoy!!

[walkingintheheartbreaksatellite]

I’m Here, Right Here Pt. 1

(Harry Styles x Implied Bi!Fem!reader)

My take from when I first listened to satellite!

Y/N is Jeff's assistant and Harry's best friend. She's been in and out of relationships for one reason or another and is upset. Harry is hopelessly in love with her and she is too blind to see it.

Dating while traveling is not for the weak..

After yet another failed date, I return to my hotel room to find Harry propping himself against my door. He turns his attention to me and smiles when he sees me.

"Hey! Was looking for you. Thought you might want to get some dinner? Sushi and a movie? Haven't done that in a while.."

I sigh and frown, shaking my head as I unlock my door, Harry following me inside.

"That's really sweet, H, but not tonight. I'm honestly exhausted and all I want to do is shower and crash. Rain check? I promise we'll do it tomorrow."

He frowns before nodding.

"Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

I sniffle as I pull off my makeup, trying not to cry.

"I just don't know what I'm doing wrong! Like this guy! His name was Todd... It seemed like we had a lot in common but halfway through dinner, he saw my tattoos and he started scolding me. Then he proceeded to tell me what I was doing wrong in my life, starting with my career choice-."

He lets out a laugh and shakes his head as he collapses on my bed.

"What? You want to be a music producer. I'd say you're heading in the right direction."

I groan and start to pull off my jewelry.

"No, because apparently, that's not a good career for a wife. Like, as if dude! I want things for myself. Im not gonna be some stay at home wife popping out babies, you know? H...Harry, are you listening to me?"

He doesn't answer but he lifts his hand up and gives me a thumbs up. I sigh and change my clothes in the bathroom before coming out and plopping on my stomach next to him.

"What do you think I should do, H?"

He sighs and he's quiet for a minute, his eyes looking anywhere but at me.

"You could stop... Take a break from dating."

I groan and plop my head into the bed.

"I'm not getting any younger! I want things sure, but I want to be happy too!"

He sits up, finally looking down into my eyes, a serious look on his face.

"Aren't you though? You've got all your friends. You've told me time and time again that the perfect one for me will come when I least expect it. So why not try taking your own advice?"

With that, he gets up and heads to the door. I frown, quickly getting up from the bed and chasing after him. I give him a pout and he sighs.

He gives me a small hug and leaves my room, not saying another word.

As promised, the next night, we get sushi and watch some movies. As I stuff my face with California Rolls, Harry continues to ramble.

"You've gone on a date almost every stop we've been on! Who does that?!"

He laughs and I can't help but shrug.

"Someone who just doesn't have any luck, I guess? Every date I've been on... No one really seems to stick out. And it's not like I'm not keeping my options open! But it's just... I don't know."

He nods in understanding before popping a California roll in his mouth.

"Are you gonna sue the dating apps like in that movie? What was it.. Love Guaranteed?"

I snort and choke on my food a little before shaking my head.

"No! That's just a movie! As if I'd meet some attractive lawyer and fall in love! Crazy talk! And what about you, Mr. Pop Star? You've been single for a while. Where's your love life going?"

He doesn't look at me but he shrugs.

"Dunno. Just kind of focusing on my music right now. Figured I've got time, right? No use in worrying."

He drops the topic and we hang out for the rest of the night. For the next week, Harry seems pretty quiet around me, and I'm not really sure why. Mr. Azoff gave me the night off, even though there's a show.

I had originally planned to go on a date, but my date cancelled, so I decide to watch the show. I stand next to Mr. Azoff as I watch Harry go up on stage.

"Why are you still here? Thought you had a hot date?"

I shake my head with a sigh, holding my sweater close to me.

"Cancelled on me. Thought I might enjoy watching him without having to run around for once."

He nods with a small smile. It's quiet for a minute between the two of us, until he says something I wasn't expecting.

"I've noticed you've been going on dates a lot... At least once every stop, if not more."

My eyes widen and I try to defend myself.

"Mr. Azoff-."

He frowns and shakes his head.

"Y/N, I'm not saying this as your boss. I'm saying this as your friend. You do it in your down time but we're all just a bit worried about you. This has to be a lot on you. Just... Talk to someone about it, okay? If you're doing it because you feel alone, don't. You have so many people who care about you. So just... Take it easy, okay?"

I nod and turn my attention back to the stage. Watching Harry up there.. No matter how many times I watch, he's always so captivating. I can't take my eyes off him...

After the show is over, Harry quickly takes a shower. I run out, offering to grab coffee for the band. When I come back, I get echos of thank you's and when I give Harry his coffee, he gives me a look of shock.

"Thought you had a date tonight? What are you doing here?"

He takes the coffee from my hand and I plop down next to him on the sofa, slipping off my heels before resting my feet on the coffee table.

"A bust. Yet again. Maybe next time will work, right? Aren't you the one always telling me to be optimistic?"

He's quiet and he simply stands up before he turns to face me, a look of anger on his face.

"Why are you doing this to yourself, Y/N? You come to me every time, crying for one reason or another how it didn't work out and you're so sad that you're alone! Did you ever think that maybe you're not alone?!"

I stand up and cross my arms, looking straight at him.

"Harry, you don't know what it's like! People like you! I have to work my ass off to make sure I'm appealing to others! I want more! I want love! Don't you get that?"

He shakes his head and walks to the door before turning around to face me again.

"Did you ever stop and think that maybe I might love you?! That watching you go on date after date is killing me?!"

My eyes widen and I stutter.

"H-Harry.."

He shakes his head once again, and stares straight into my eyes.

"It's always round and round with you! Like a fucking satellite! I'm just- I'm done Y/N. I've tried. For months. But I'm done."

He doesn't say another word as he leaves and I fall onto the couch, tears starting to fall down my face.

He was right there?

🚾 1283

Part 2

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[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - There's so much airing even I'm struggling to keep up

That's why I'm late.

Aug 2023 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Sat iQIYI) 6 of 8 - Oh no. I am totally in love with the escaped young master & his smitten bodyguard. How did that happen? (Be careful P’Thee the broken ones are the most tempting. Tin understands.) NO SINGING! Trust Thai BL to destroy any moment of sentiment I might have by picking up a damn guitar. And we finally get Charn’s Batman villain origin story. Good use of back hug! This is a GREAT show. Melodramatic as fuck, but GREAT. Gotta say this pair in NOT Thailand’s best kissers but not everyone can be Zee++. Still I think that + singing + a touch of overacting is likely to keep this out of the 10/10 club.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 1 of 12 - Rich /poor dynamic with characters & set up exactly as expected. Chimon is great. Perth is good too. A real rich-kid bully, Heirs level or Japanese F4 evil. All the teachers are also corrupt (that’s kinda a Thai thing, I think because they can't call out the government). I gotta say, Marc is doing a bang-up job as the jock friend, too. And the kiss twist was fun. All in all, this is good. And you know me, I love a high school BL.

I Feel You Linger in the Air (Sat YT) ep 1 of 12 - The time travel historical romance many of us have been waiting for. Adaption of y-novel by Violet Rain, from the producers of Lovely Writer. Heartbroken architect is transported to the 1930s. Nonkul (actor playing Jom) keeps reminding me of Cho Han Gyeol from Love Mate. It’s a bit slow to start but interesting when it hits its stride. The pacing feels like a Chinese historical (makes me wonder if this with be 4 or 6 act structure). Nonkul is a wonderful actor. They weren’t sharing the screen for long, but the leads seem good together. I’m in. 

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 2 of 10 - Well. It’s entertaining, I'll say that for it. Addiction. Manipulation. Queer as folk & all that jazz. (No jazz for you, Thailand. Oh no! I’m giving them ideas.) I would like it to turn out that Mew is actually manipulating everything. This is his revenge con on Top. Mew is, after all, supposed to be "the smart one." Gotta say, this is darn near perfect casting. But honestly? This show could just be about Ray & Sand. Their story (and them in it) is easily the most riveting. Sand better be careful, the wildly broken ones are always the best in bed, because they don’t care ao they have no shame and that's HOT.

Hidden Agenda (Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 6 of 10 - I like how soft Joke’s version of seme flirting is. It’s mellow, like his voice gets with Zo. I also liked Zo casually chatting to his friends about how he feels about being flirted with. His friends gave good advice & were supportive. Oh no! A boy in a BL went into the rain ALONE. What ON EARTH will happen next? The argument was interesting, because it gave us insight into Zo’s maturity & ability to handle a relationship. I’ve been wondering why anyone would like him, and now I know. Joke & Nita’s backstory is fun. I like the gay boy protecting the straight girl reverse beard action. On a complete aside, I really like Dunk’s makeup in this series. It’s very Kdrama.

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 8 - The house ghosts trying to help are cute. The plot is at least... a plot? I don’t know. Dias Ex Mafia is a new one on me. (COME ON THAT’S A GREAT PUN, PRAISE ME!) I’m ready for this show to be over. 

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 7 of 12 - Honestly, the whole time I’m watching this I’m just thinking I wish JaFirst got better scripts. Speaking of, I don’t object, but these characters sure moved into sex fast. I really don’t quite understand how Daddy & Hot Doc got together so fast either. It feels like their story was meant to be spread out into the other episodes but didn’t get cut in properly, so it ended up all in this one? Or is it just the pacing is particularly bad in this show?

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 8 of 10 eps - I have no idea what is going on. What are all of Dino’s friends doing? What do they want? what’s their point in the story? I’m even annoyed by Peak, and love him. Sex scene which they tried to make sexy. Operative word being tried. Although, there was some interesting after sex discussion about mechanics. And there was a cute bathtub chat about pet names. But this show is a lotta work for very little pay out. 

Wedding Plan (Wed YT & iQIYI) ep 5 of 7 - I like the sunshine sides? PUNCH LOM 2023! Trash watch here!

Love in Translation (Sat iQIYI) ep 1 of 10 - Pushy older bro is Earn from Love Sick, yay! And he’s the hyung of a side couple, which is "best friend’s older brother" trope! My favorite!!!! Have we seen this in BL before? I don't think so. Anyway, DOUBLE YAY! The main couple… eh. You know I loathe stalker characters. And I viscerally HATE this one. Almost as bad as SCOY, not sure I can take it, actually. The squealing of "Tammy!" is worse on my ear than any off-key guitar strumming. I may have to DNF or fast forward through all his parts… but he’s the lead. What to do? I do like the “Chinese” businessman actor. He very cute. (On an aside, I was just reading about commercial real estate as the loophole for foreign property investors in Thailand. Cool plot point.) I’m getting a Taming of the Shrew vibes from this. Just me? For now it's living at the bottom of the list for sheer unadulterated loathing of Phumjai. Not the actor, he was my favorite and only good thing about Our Days. But this character? NO.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Jun & Jun (Korea Thur Viki) ep 5 of 8 - This is basically the gay Boys Over Flowers of my heart. Or as close as I think we’ll get from BL. I like both of the 2nd leads, even though I suspect Simon of actually being into everyone’s fav hyung. Cute to see the Mr Heart boys back on my screen, oh so briefly. Such a Taiwan trick, reusing a beloved couple like that. Nice gimmie to the fans. Meanwhile, Choi Jun - boy sure knows his angles but his motives? Please don’t let this be another arranged marriage beard situation? I can’t take 2 in the same month. 

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 8 of 10 - The boyfriends ep! JC is biggest simp spoiling his baby EVER. Taiwan = the sappiest of saps. “Owning the same key” is such a cute way of putting it. Also I love the "knew all along" twist, made me happy. The angst is silly but that's normal in Taiwanese BL. 

Love Class Season 2 (Korea Fri Viki) eps 3-4 of 10 - Pair 1: Lee Hyun is such a wide-open, bleeding, no-shame romantic. It’s kinda great. Boy has a poet’s soul & NO artifice. J-Min is startlingly good, very nuanced. I know I keep saying that, but I’m v surprised by his skillz. And… add in creepy stalker, goody. Pair 2: The "other student couple" I’m not into, also NO SINGING. Pair 3: The underwear gift was so fucking funny. “I’m going reap the boxers I sewed” is next level script excellence. These two are brilliant at gayest-of-gay flirt-negging, I'm INTO IT. One of my housemates said, in response to my audible cackling, "You seem to be enjoying your shows extra much tonight."  

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 2 of 8 - Oh I love love love them. It’s so old school yaoi and SO JBL. No other country could produce this kind of show. I love this little feminist aspect where the weatherman treats his boy like a 1950s housewife & said boy thinks that makes him an indentured servant. Clocks. But also, the way our weatherman LOOKS at his boy. He is so in love. (It looks like we skip next week for holiday reasons?) 

Sing My Crush (Korea Wed iQIYI) eps 5-6 of 8 - It remains enjoyable. 

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) ep 6 of 12 - At least we know Minato actually desires Shin, he just won’t do anything about it. Also, Minato chose the perfect person to come out to. That's nice for him. Finally, Shu & Asuka are glorious. Sides are winning these days.

Stay Still (Hong Kong Tues YouTube) ep 3 of 5 - A proper faen fatal has entered one of our couples. She won too, since she ended up marrying the boy. Still not sure about this show (and it should have convinced me by now). I definitely like the tattoo couple better than the reunion couple. Still, not a lot happened in this episode and this is short series, they don’t have time to waste. It remains intriguing but not... erm... good.

In case you missed it

River Knows Fish Heart is leaving Gaga soon. It's a decent little bully romance Chinese BL (pulp) - yes, you read that right. Actual CBL. Not great, but if you're into the CBL stuff, especially the early stuff, this has some of that tenor only made in 2018 (I have a feeling it was shot in 2017 and skated through). Anygay, just staying. Catch it before it disappears because with CBL once they gone, often, they gone forever.

Friend. Boy Friend a new Thai BL pulp was supposed to start airing on Aug 19th. I can't find it. Neither can MDL.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Everything from Thailand seems to be dropping on Sat & Sun this month. It's a good thing I got quiet weekends for a while. Also the BL firehose is upon us, so much content.

Starting this week:

8/20 (tomorrow) My Universe series (Sun iQIYI) 24 eps - This is sampler pack BL, 12 pairs, each pair gets 2 eps, not sure on the order they’ll drop. Known couples include EarthBank from Destiny Seeker and KaownahTurbo from Love Stage!!!, fresh faces otherwise. Jane to direct.

8/22 Kisseki: Dear to Me formerly known as Miracle (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) 13 eps - From screenwriter Lin Pei Yu (We Best Love, H3: Trapped) features a student doctor forced to take care of a gangster. I love the premise and like the writer.  

8/23 Why R U? (Korean remake iQIYI) 8 eps - I find everything about this hilarious. I mean if Korea remakes it, we lose all the sexy and then... would we have a story at all? No we would not. Not even for 8 short eps. It’d be like one of those mesh shopping bags.

8/24 Man Suang (Thailand movie, domestic cinema release) - historical drama about Thai burlesque with KP’s MileApo. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Another show reviewing itself. (Dino Love)

Don't insult bastards, Lom. (Wedding trash)

I would like this adorable romcom GMMTV, please and thank you.

See what I mean? Trixy.

Thanks boys. (All Only Friends)

(Last week) 

[ithinkabouttzu]

I need more BoB content! You're the best!

Pls write proposals ideas!

And pls include Speirs ❤️

Easy Co. Proposing to you!

Genre! Romance; fluff

Warnings! Language, suggestive

Description! How the men of easy would propose to you (gn!)

(This is a little christmas gift from me to all of you!! Also this is my first bday on this account and I wanted to treat you guys :) Love you all!! - Mac 💗)

Dick Winters: Him proposing to you would be the most sweet and genuine thing ever. He would spend months just trying to figure out what would be the right way to ask you. He would buy you the prettiest ring ever, I think several months before he would ask you what type of ring like the best and get whichever ring you said you liked. He would wait extra long to propose after asking though just to make sure it’s a complete surprise to you. He definitely is proposing to you somewhere intimate and quiet where you guys can just enjoy each other afterwards. Maybe a quiet spot near the lake, or a pretty hiking trail with gorgeous views. It’s the sweetest thing when he gets down on one knee though, he’s so nervous but still manages to ask you.

Lewis Nixon: I feel like he’s the complete opposite. He doesn’t even realize it himself that he’s proposing to you until like a week before. You guys were sitting on the rooftop just enjoying your time with each other when he finally knew he wanted to marry you. The next day he goes and buys the best shiny ring he can find, one he’s sure that you’ll love. He would be a little nervous but at the end of the day he would just be so excited to surprise you with this. Before proposing to you he would invite your whole family over to the mountain top view that he was going to do it at. Setting out rose petals, and getting a photographer. When you get home from work he’d tell you to get dress as nice as possible, that you guys were going to an amazing dinner. You would be so confused when you guys finally got there. Seeing your loved ones and rose petals all around the scenic view. He goes a bit over the top but it’s adorable nonetheless.

Carwood Lipton: I just know he would come up with such a unique and wonderful idea when it comes to proposing to you. First thing he has to do though is ask your parents for permission before he does. When he gets their blessing is when he can really start planning though. He’d pick out a simple but beautiful ring for you, just a diamond with the band but still it’s gorgeous. The hardest part for him though is trying to pick out where and when to propose to you. He’s not exactly sure if it should be private or public and when would be the best time to actually propose to you. He finally decides to do it during the holiday season while taking you to see all of the pretty lights in the park. At the end of your guys walk to the lights he would take you to a gazebo with lights wrapped all around it with rose pedals (that he set out and planned hours earlier) in the gazebo is when he finally proposes to you.

Joe Toye: He knows for sure that he wants to marry you, but he has absolutely no idea how he’s going to propose. The thought of him having to set up an idea for his proposal is honestly terrifying and stressful. He doesn’t trust himself have as much as he should. So his has the idea to call one of your loved ones for advice on how to do set it all up. When he finally gets their help it’s so much easier, he decides to take you on a little getaway in the mountains and propose to you there. He waits until the last day to propose to you, just because he was so scared you were gonna say no. You could tell that something was up the way he was being so nervous and jittery the entire trip. When he does finally propose it’s perfect. He’s got tears in his eyes at the end of his speech, he honestly didn’t even think he’d get so emotional, but he’s full of love for you and when you said yes it was amazing. He finally knew that he’d have you as his forever and ever 😭

Joe Liebgott: He’d be nervous as shit trying to decide how to propose to you. He makes SURE to keep the ring in his back pocket no matter what. 1st reason being because he doesn’t want you finding it or someone stealing. 2nd reason is because in the back of his mind he definitely would pop the question at any time if he felt the time was right. The proposal would be a little spontaneous, it would be just after a nice dinner date and now you guys were walking around outside where the huge garden was, the sun was setting, the scene was right, it just felt perfect to him so that’s when he popped the question. Honestly it was so cute you could hear the trembling in his voice because of how nervous he was “I love ya’ to death, please marry me” :(

Bill Guarnere: I honestly think it wouldn’t take him that long to figure out that he wanted to marry you. He wanted to marry you right after he met you tbh, so when you bring up the topic a couple months later on marriage and how good you would look with a diamond on your finger he almost immediately buys you a ring. He’s so ready to finally propose to you but it seems like he could never find the right time, it’s like every time that he tries to, something gets in the way. That’s when he just settles for a private proposal at your guys’ place. He makes sure to go extreme though, putting up balloons and rose pedals everywhere WITH and extra bouquet just to give to you, candles lit, music playing softly in the background, with some amazing Italian food. Either way it’s perfect and he couldn’t thank you enough for saying yes.

Eugene Roe: Him proposing would be the best thing ever. He’s so kind and considerate and I know he would makes sure to have everything planned out and decided on when he’d propose and how he’d do it. Of course he’d ask your parents or loved ones for permission to marry you before he goes through with it though and asks if they would want to join in with the surprise. He would want to propose somewhere that’s really pretty and I think it would be somewhere special. A place that both of you really like to go to or hangout at. Maybe somewhere like the beach, or a mountain side that you guys like to go to in y’all’s free time. The ring would also have a nice meaning to it, maybe your and his birthstone on the wedding band and the diamond ring to go along with it or maybe ring that’s been passed down.

George Luz: He really tries to figure out an idea that’s special and creative for you and him but also not too over the top. If you like skiing or snowboarding maybe sometime during that trip, like at the bottom of a run? or maybe even right after you get off the lift, if you’ve never been skiing or snowboarding before he will be glad to show you the ropes lol, either way it would be super cute. I think for a ring he would want to give you something that you really like, before getting the idea to propose to you he would ask you little questions here and there (that you didn’t catch on to thank goodness) about rings and what type of rings you would really like. Before proposing he would be sooo nervous but excited? ughhh he just loves you so much and is ready to spend the rest of his life with you. He’s kinda scared you’ll say no, but when you say yes he gets so happy and excited it’s the cutest thing ever 🥹

Bull Randleman: I think he would propose to you in a very classic way but also very planned and thought out. Maybe after a nice dinner? Like he would talk to the restaurant about setting up a special room there with just you and him and letting the workers know before that he was planning on proposing so he could have the best wine and food possibly (followed with extra candles and roses in the room for the aesthetic) He would be nervous but only a little bit. In the back of his mind he knows that you and him are in love with each other so he’s not so worried that you’ll say no. He makes sure to ask you parents, siblings, any of your loved ones for permission to propose to you first. He’s very family oriented so it’s very important to them to get their approval. The ring would probably be a classic but beautiful diamond ring, one that’s timeless really (like you ;) anyway, his proposal is so sweet and romantic it’s just the best ever.

Floyd Talbert: Okay cute idea: You. Him. At the end of a beautiful hiking trail. One that’s obviously not very hard or strenuous bc he doesn’t want his honey getting sweaty or hurt on the trail before he actually proposes. Makes sure to scope out the area weeks before and finds the perfect area that he wants to propose to you at. Even goes the length of hiding a photographer in the bushes ahead of time. The plan was to get to the very top, and then when you guys got there he would stop because “he wasn’t feeling good” (which is such an obvious lie) and when he’s about to fall down he ends up on one knee and that’s when he pulls out the ring and proposes. It would actually be such a cute and funny idea and the way he planned everything out was so sweet too. Only problem was that the photographer actually scared the crap out of you so bad that you accidentally hit the ring and you guys lost it for like 30 mins 😭 (it’s okay you guys found it afterwards )

Don Malarkey: Okay this sweet boy would be SUPER nervous to propose to you. Like he’s dead set on spending the rest of his life with you but also has no idea how tell you that. He honestly puts so much thought into how he wants to propose to you, when and where. He finally settles for doing something fun, a scavenger hunt around the city. At first when you get there you think it’s just a cute little date idea for your guys’ anniversary. He would make sure to involve your friends and family or anyone you were close to that would be in the scavenger hunt throughout giving you clues and such. When you finally find him he’d be waiting in town square with lights, roses and music playing. Oh and of course the special ring he picked out just for you. He would be so jittery trying to get all of his words out, but he eventually pops the question. It’s adorable and afterwards you guys and your loved ones all celebrate together.

Skip Muck: Tell me why I think him proposing to you would be super random?!? Like just imagine, you and him walking around together, smoking and talking (or just him smoking if you don’t ofc) but just getting into a whole bunch of deep conversations about anything and everything, and when he’s about to take you home he just asks you straight up, “You wanna get married?” It would take you by complete shock but also not? He’s very spontaneous so this isn’t very unusual but, like, he just proposed to you?? When you said yes he’d be surprised, like you actually said yes??? The very next day he would buy you a gorgeous ring and propose to you the right way, making sure that it was official that you and him were engaged. It’s okay though he makes sure to plan out the wedding and honeymoon nicely though.

Shifty Powers: When he realizes he wants to propose to you, his first idea is taking you to the beach and taking a small little trip with you and proposing to you there. He starts setting everything up months in advance, finding the right resort, the right beach, making sure everything is absolutely perfect so that you don’t have to worry at all during the trip. The ring would be so gorgeous, if there’s any specific type of ring you really like he would make SURE to get that one for you, he just loves you so much and wants you to have an amazing proposal. Finally, during the last days on the trip he would take you out to the beach right when the sun was setting, the perfect view to propose. Before hand he would draw out letters in the sand that would say, “Marry me?” When you guys finally get to that spot is when he’d get down on one knee. Honestly the cutest idea ever.

Babe Heffron: It all happens during a simple talk over dinner. Both of you, sitting at home laughing and enjoying time with each other. You guys eating dinner until you made the joke “You know, we should get married” His whole face goes blank right when you said that, turning more serious. Did you somehow know he was going to propose to you later that week? Had you found the ring the he was hiding? “Are you okay? Why are you looking at me like that?” You said, a little worried why his expression turned more seriously. “We should” He said, “I’m serious.” That’s when your eye’s completely widen bc what? He was proposing now? “Okay, let’s get married” You reply back happily. Not even realizing he was gonna surprise you with the ring, roses and a proper proposal later the next morning.

Frank Perconte: His proposal to you is simple, cute and sweet. He’d ask one of the shops downtown if he could borrow their rooftop to propose to you at. He’d set up twinkle lights out there for the scenery and rose pedals everywhere beforehand. When the day comes, he would ask you to meet him up at that exact rooftop at the perfect time when the sun started to set. Not telling you why to meet him there but to dress up nicely. You had just assumed maybe it’d be for a small event with friends that he didn’t tell you about? When you get there you’d see him, all nice and dressed up, on one knee with a big ring in his hand. It was absolutely shocking. The ring would be gorgeous, he would make sure to find you the best fashionable ring ever. One that he knows would look perfect on your pretty hand. “What do you say, y/n. I wanna be with you forever. Will you marry me?”

Ronald Speirs: It was so nice. He had taken you out for the day around the city. Going around to different shops together and looking around at all the entertainment from the busy weekend. “Stop here” He’d say, pulling you aside by the prettiest part in town. “What are you doing?” You’d ask him nervously, wondering why people were throwing looks at you and him, until you look back at him and he is on one knee, Opening the small box with the ring in it. “Marry me”, he said in a loud voice, catching attention from people around. You tried pulling him up to stand, anxious by all the people watching you guys now. “Please” He looked up at you. You wanted to say something but you got nervous by everyone staring. All you could do was nod shyly. Being crowded with cheers and applause’s afterwards.

Johnny Martin: Okay he goes a little crazy but I mean who’s he kidding, you’re the love of his life and will be sure to let you know it with his proposal! Calls the Botanical Gardens in the nearest city and asks if they can have the place shut down for just you and him for part of the day (mans is determined for everything to be perfect) Decides he’s going to propose to you by all of the gorgeous tulips. Streamers? check. Ring? Check. A big neon light that says “Marry me”? Check. He’s got it all set up and planned. Luckily the tulips are the end of the walk around the gardens so when you guys are finishing up the trip he can pop the question right there where everything is set up. It’s gorgeous. It’s perfect. It’s beautiful. Honestly you would think that a wedding planner designed and set it up by how nice it looks. Even the ring is somehow perfect just how you’d want it? By the end of the night you are sure this man can completely read your mind by how great everything was. (The cutest thing is - you guys get married in the same spot in the Botanical Gardens where he proposed 😭)

Skinny Sisk: He has the hardest time trying to pick where exactly he should propose. Whenever he does the most casual things he’ll just look around and think, “This would be a great place to propose to Y/N at” it’s so cute how much he thinks of you even in the most simplest places. He takes you on a small trip to a beautiful lake house in the summer time with beautiful window views so you can see the lake from the living room anytime. It would be so fun (personally speaking) riding jet-skis and going on the boat, just sun bathing around and enjoying time with each other. The ring he would pick would be so beautiful too. One with sparkle and light but also one that specifically reminds him of you. He would propose to you on the pier in the early morning after breakfast, the sun lightly shining across the lake water making it look so beautiful, you just had to say yes!

David Webster: He makes sure to incorporate art and culture into his proposal to you. I think he would write it in a sweet, simple poem that would put you to tears, genuinely the sweetest thing you’ve ever heard. He’s so romantic to you. Taking you out to do all of your favorite things, beforehand asking you to make sure that whatever you want to do, you guys do it! He would ask the question later in the day though, at the end of the night just in case you said no. The ring he’d pick out for you would be gorgeous, with small diamonds surrounding the whole band and one huge ring in the middle. And amazingly, he’d propose somewhere crazy, a freakin’ hot air balloon over looking the sunset city. “It would be horrible if you said no right now, but would you give me the biggest blessing, and marry me?”

Chuck Grant: He gets so excited at the thought of being able to marry you. He gets a little over his head like, he just bought a ring and he’s already thinking about what you’d look like in a wedding dress. It’s such a cute and simple idea but he’d definitely go for a picnic proposal. All the food you can eat with wine and beer, and of course, the shiny ring in his back pocket. He would set up the nicest picnics ever. Bringing everything you guys would need (utensils, napkins, blanket if it gets cold, if you want it there’s a 90% chance he’s got it somewhere in the basket) It would be on a beautiful beach looking over the ocean, the wind completely stopping when you guys got there. The weather was amazing too, it’s like everything was almost perfect for your special day. “I’ll love you til’ i’m dead, Y/N, marry me?”

Buck Compton: His proposal happens during a very random domesticated moment between you and him. He always had the idea of proposing to you when it was just you and him. Getting to enjoy you in the privacy of just your home instead of out in the public eye, but he didn’t really expect for him to full out ask you for your hand in marriage while flipping pancakes during breakfast. He didn’t mean to either. He kept the ring in his back pocket at all times (bad choice, we’ve learned) and when he was putting up dishes, the ring feel out of his pocket, and right onto your feet. Of course you picked it up and he has to explain to you who the ring’s for and why, and by then end of explaining and rambling he’s pretty much proposing to you at that point. “Do you like the ring? If you marry me you might just get to keep it ;)”

Thank you for your request!! You’re the best too! Much love to all of you guys, this is my first birthday post on here! 🩷 If you liked this, make sure to like or reblog! 🤍🤍🤍

[queenjunothegreat]

Told you guys I was gonna start posting the random stuff I won't finish and I wasn't lying ( ꒪꒳​꒪ )

Finally, Leo gave in. “What's up with you, Beauty Queen?”

She blinked at him, like she was startled that he addressed her. “Oh! I just thought you told me you were going to dump Jason. I'm a little surprised to see you haven't.”

Leo chuckled nervously. Jason ignored them and just shoved his face deeper in his book like the slimy little coward of a traitor that he was. “Uh, I dunno what you're talking about.”

“Hmm… I suppose it could have been a dream, then,” Piper mused, then she gave Jason a sympathetic look. “You'd better watch out, Jason. I had dreams about Leo dumping all of his previous relationships only days before it happened.”

Without glancing up from his book, Jason said, “Piper, please. We both know Leo doesn't have enough game to bag anyone but me.”

Piper wheezed in laughter and Leo turned on Jason with a furiously betrayed expression and vermilion cheeks. “Dude! What the fuck!”

Jason closed his book and blinked owlishly at him. “I thought you wanted me to try being funnier.”

“That doesn't mean you should clown on me!”

“Oh, I'm sorry,” Jason said earnestly. “I'm just not all that practiced, so I figured I should start with an easy target.”

“Stop, stop, he’s already dead!” Piper howled.

Leo sneered at her. “Yeah, yeah. Just remember that I had enough game to steal your boyfriend.”

“Bestie, you stole a closeted lesbian’s man,” Piper reminded him. “Our whole relationship he was basically wearing a sign around his neck that said ‘Free to a good home.’” She gave Jason an apologetic wince. “No offense.”

“Not sure how I'm supposed to not be at least a little offended by that, but I'll give it my best shot.”

“We are ignoring the real issue here!” Leo interrupted. “Piper! Since when did you know!?”

“Since forever, dummy,” Piper scoffed. “I can't believe you two really thought you could keep this a secret from me. I'm an Aphrodite kid. I can literally smell it on you two like cheap perfume. And, Leo, really? Like really, really? You thought you could hide this from me? You couldn’t even keep your favorite yogurt flavor a secret from me.”

“It's peach, right?” Jason asked, looking at Leo.

Leo laid a sympathetic hand on his knee. “Sorry, bud, but it's actually strawberry banana.”

“He's lying; it's blueberry.”

Jason looked stricken and stared down at his hands. “I don't know what to believe anymore.”

“And you!” Piper pointed her finger at Jason, and he suddenly found the ceiling very interesting. “Next time you need advice for how to hide hickies, maybe don't ask the Aphrodite cabin when you're trying to hide your relationship from an Aphrodite kid!”

Leo frowned at him in disappointment. “You went to the Aphrodite cabin? Really?”

“Who was I supposed to ask?” Jason demanded defensively. “I don't have a cabin full of siblings to help me out. The closest I have are Nico and Percy! Nico's boyfriend can basically kiss bruises away, and Percy literally laughed me out of the Poseidon cabin. I tried to IM Thalia, but she just looked like she was going to be sick when I asked and hung up on me. I tried to call her back, but Iris told me she'd paid thirty drachmas to block me for the rest of the week.”

“Still though! You could have asked anyone else!”

“Maybe I wouldn't have had to ask for help if you actually kept it below the collar like you were supposed to.”

“Oh, so it's my fault now? Big talk coming from the guy who used my shoulders as a chew toy.”

“Oh, dog jokes. Real original, Valdez.”

“It's not a dog joke, it's just an accurate metaphor because you're literally an animal.”

“Honestly, I'm surprised that you didn't already know how to handle them, Jason,” Piper chimed in. “I figured you would have plenty of experience.”

Jason stared at her like she'd grown a second and possibly third head. “Why would you think that? I arguably have less game than Leo. I'm just tall.”

“I think you have game, babe,” Leo said, patting him on the knee. Then his face screwed up. “Wait a minute. No I don't! Fuck you!”

“Anyway. In case you forgot, my one and only girlfriend turned out to be a lesbian who only dated me because my crazy stepmom brainwashed us,” Jason insisted. “The fact that I haven't fumbled Leo is a miracle beyond words.”

“You're trying real hard to fumble right now,” Leo scowled. “Don't even know why I'm dating you, to be honest.”

”Because I'm mildly obsessed with you and you like the ego boost. And I also hold heavy stuff for you.”

“Plus you actually like his mother henning,” Piper added. She shuddered. “God, when we were dating it was like having a second dad. He just hovers all the time. I can't tell you how many times he asked me if I ate dinner while we were on the quest. Like, we were on the ship together. You know if I ate dinner, my guy.”

Jason pouted and crossed his arms. “Fine. See if I offer you any granola bars any time soon.”

“I think it's kinda sweet,” Leo said with a somewhat sheepish grin.

“That's because you—” Piper leaned over and poked him between the eyes, “are incapable of taking care of yourself, so you need someone to do it for you. Where everyone else sees smothering, you see the only feasible way for you to actually eat more than twice a week and get a full night's sleep.”

“Speaking of, it should be dinner soon,” Jason said, checking his watch.

“Babe, this is not how you beat the suburban dad allegations,” Leo clucked. “What kind of teenager wears a wristwatch?”

“Percy literally wears one everyday?”

“His turns into a magic shield that his brother made for him. Plus, he can't read it and even if he could, the time is always wrong.”

“What am I supposed to do then? What do you two do?”

“We just never know the time,” Piper said, rolling her eyes. “Like cool kids. Cool kids never know the time.”

Jason gave them both a very tired look. “I'm asking Percy to drown me and I'm telling Nico to make sure you two never see me in Elysium.”

“Pft, as if,” Leo scoffed. “We're your favorite people. Ever.”

Jason didn't say anything, he just pressed his lips together and furrowed his brow. “Awww!” Piper cooed, pinching his cheek. “We are! Look at that face!”

Jason puffed up his slightly pink cheeks and batted her hand away, getting to his feet. “I'm sitting with the Athena kids at dinner.”

“Yeah? Well, I'm sitting with the Demeter kids!” Leo announced.

“The Demeter kids won't let you anywhere near them after you accidentally set their roof on fire last week,” Piper reminded him.

“Just kidding; I'm sitting with the Hermes kids!”

“Okay, then I'm sitting with the Hephaestus cabin. I'm gonna get Nyssa to tell me any other secrets you're trying to keep from me.”

“Hey, that's not fair!”

“You two aren't allowed to just sit with other cabins,” Jason sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “You have siblings, remember?”

“Boo!” they said in unison.

Jason laughed. “Seriously, come on, you two. We do actually need to eat.”

“Coming, dad,” Leo crooned.

Piper arched her brows. “Kinky.” Leo gagged at her.

Jason ignored them both and left for the Pavilion, Piper and Leo bouncing along in his wake.

[keenzinemugstudent]

Clark Kent x Black reader

⚠️bit of a make out scene at the end no Minors!⚠️

Clark starts to notice how much he loves you

You had an amazing smile. How did he not see it until now? I mean you were always pretty he wasn't going to deny that maybe it was because she was his best friend that he didn't really see it until now when he made a joke which he didn't think was funny until you laughed giving him a beautiful smile it made his heart beat fast wow did you make his heart beat so fast

"Clark? Clark? Hey Kent!"

"Hm? Yeah?"

"Are you okay hon? You space out in me for second there."

He blushed as you placed a warm hand on his cheek

"I'm fine just uh just thinking "

"About?"

"Nothing important?"

"Well than as long as your okay love."

'Love' oh he absolutely love when you called him that! How it rolled off your lips was to much for him to bare why was he feeling like this now? He's been friends with you since highschool and he has Lois the woman he cares about and was even considering marrying.

"Oh come on Clark you should be happy for me I finally got a date!"

"I am happy."

"Liar!"

"I'm not lying!"

"Your making that face love."

"What face?"

"The face you make whenever you look worried. I'll be fine." There you go again with that smile once again making his heart beat faster than usual it was insane that a single smile could make his heart go wild.

Later that night he gotten a phone call from you he picked up and he could hear it in your voice that you had been crying he dropped everything he was doing and rushed over to your apartment when he got there you were sitting on the sofa holding the stuffed teddy bear he had given you on you birthday when she heard him enter she run over and gave him a hug crying into his chest. Your date had never showed up at the restaurant leaving you sitting there all night like a fool it took a lot to make Clark angry but seeing the tears rolling down your face made him want to find the idiot and make him apologize but he had to be here for you. So the whole night they sat on the sofa hugging enough other she fell asleep in his arms he moved a bit if curly hair out of your face he hated seeing you upset but was happy he could always be there for comfort.

The next morning he had gotten into a fight with Lois about how he spent more time with you than with her and how he wasn't putting the effort to make up for lost time in their relationship. He would apologize and tell her that he didn't mean to make her feel less important but there was an emergency and he needed to be there for you he didn't know he'd fall asleep with her (he wasn't going to tell her that if course) that's when Lois made him choose you or her she gave him a week to think it over so that's what he did he went to Bruce for advice and he gave it to him straight that his relationship wasn't anything of his concern but could understand where Lois was coming from not wanting to be second in their relationship which honestly made Clark frown he never made Lois second place yes you were important but did it really seem that way? That's when thought about the night he died the last person he thought of was you how your reaction to his dead fighting a monster for people who didn't deserve him.

"Bruce I honestly don't know what to do."

"You have to pick Clark. Lois or Y/n you can't have both."

"I love Lois and she knows that why is she making me choose?!"

"Because she knows that you have feelings towards Y/n and that you will always love her more Clark."

He wanted to deny it but he stayed quiet because in his heart he knew that Bruce was right. He did live Lois but when ever they kissed his thoughts would go straight to thinking about you and how it would feel to kiss you instead of Lois he always felt bad for having no thoughts but he couldn't help it. He made his decision the next day he was at your apartment eating breakfast.

"You broke up with Lois? Why I thought you were planning to propose!"

"We...we were having issues."

"Issues? What kind of issues Clark I don't understand I thought you loved her?"

"I did but not the way I thought I did...i guess when I died the feelings for her also died."

"Wow that's sad Clark I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing? You had nothing to do with me messing up my own relationship."

he was partly lying but he did not want to tell her the main reason why his relationship with Lois had ended was partly because of his feelings towards you but obviously he was not going to ever ever tell you that!

"Hmp okay sure."

"What's with that sarcastic remark."

"Okay I was going to say anything but pretty sure you guys broke up because of me right?"

"I wouldn't say it like that."

"But that is what happened right?"

"She tried to make me choose between you or her and I didn't want to pick who I can and cannot hang around with.."

"Okay I understand but if your partner is telling you that she feels unhappy that you're always with your female friend instead of her and maybe you guys should have talked about it."

"We did talk about it Y/n. But she still wanted me to stop seeing you she even wanted me to stop being around Diana! All because of that stupid rumor about us dating!" He says putting his head in his hands.

She just pats him on the shoulder which made him quickly relax even the slightly touch from you could calm him down.

"And besides...I thought you didn't like Lois?"

"I wouldn't say I didn't like her but I could understand where she's coming from."

"I guess..."

"Also I could definitely tell she did not like me the minute we were introduced."

"What do you mean?"

"You mean to tell me you had no idea that your girlfriend hated my guts?"

He looked at you surprised he wouldn't say that Lois hated your guts but she was slightly jealous of the attention that he was always giving you. Especially that one time you had been put in a hostage situation (thankfully he was close by) and he didn't leave your side for weeks something he hardly ever did towards Lois not like he didn't always comfort her but sometimes she's kind of just shrug it all make it seem like it wasn't a big deal didn't want to be called or seen like as some weak woman her words not his.

"Even so I can't just stop being your friend."

"You don't have too but boundaries need to be set Clark."

she set hand on top of his your hand was always so warm to the touch sometimes when he would hold your hand he was scared he would beat it it was so soft. He entwined your hands together giving a small smile at you.

"I love you..."

You gave a big smile squeezing his hands.

"I love you too Clark."

A couple of months and he was ignored by Lois at work people in the office noticed and asked him what happened he explain that their relationship was over obviously they wanted more details but he just walked away he was annoyed though when one of his coworkers had pointed out that they saw you and him at a restaurant downtown that the woman he was with was his new lover and cause of his relationship ending it took everything in him not to snap at the person but his thoughts went to back to you and your sweet smile. He had all night to think about his decision on how he felt so he sent you a text to meet him on the roof top you answered with an okay and kiss emoji which made him blush when night came he flew over to your apartment and saw you holding a gift basket.

"Thought you might need a little pick me up after all the hard work you've done."

"Thanks."

there goes that smile again his heart was beating fast from nervousness but you took a deep breath and stared you straight in the eye.

"Yaknow you might want to be careful people might get the wrong idea if they see the Man of steel with a random woman might think we're doing something naughty." She grins making him even more flustered he took a deep breath.

"I um had a reason for wanted to meet you here."

"Oh really?"

"i have something to ask you."

"Okay than ask away Kent."

"What do you feel for me?" She gave him a confused look.

"Huh?"

"What are your feelings towards me?"

"Um your my best friend."

Well that sure broke his heart.

"Clark? Did I say something wrong."

"No...its just not something I was expecting.."

"What were you expecting me to say."

That you liked me more than just a friend."

"O-oh well I mean you are most dearest person to me you should already know that."

"That's it?"

"What else is there?"

For once he wished someone was out crying for his help so this wouldn't be even more awkward.

"I broke up with Lois because I feel out of love for her."

"Yes you told me that but what does that have to do with-"

"She wanted me to stop hanging around you not because she was jealous of our friendship but because she knew that I had feelings towards you."

"Feelings towards me?"

"The day I died do you know that last person I could think of in that very moment?"

He took a step closer standing in front of you putting a hand to your warm cheek.

"You. The only person I thought in that very moment was you. Y/n I love you more than anything in this world."

You didn't say anything but look up at him face getting warm from shock and embarrassment which caused him to frown

"Clark...you can't love me."

"Why not?"

"Because you r my best friend and you just got out of a relationship with Lois! What will people think?!"

"Its none of anyone's business what happens between you or me. Certainly not Lois!"

"Clark..."

"Please Y/n just tell me how you feel." He grabs your cheeks he needed an answer from you but you reach up and gently remove his hands from your face looking towards the ground.

"I-i need to go."

She ran towards the door slamming it close behind her he could hear you crying. He just ruined his relationship with you he shouldn't have said anything. Weeks turned to months you didn't call or text him he wanted worried about you Diana told him that you just needed space after he begged her to check in on you he really was an idiot. He was at home just got out the shower wearing nothing but sweatpants that was when there was a knock at the door he answered it and was surprised to see you standing there wearing a raincoat you walked from your apartment too his in the rain which was pouring.

"Y/n what are you-."

"I-i needed to see you..."

He quickly bring you inside rushed to the bathroom to get some towels taking off you coat he saw that you were in you nightclothes which was a Superman Tshirt and shorts if things were different he'd be flustered but all he wanted to do was see if you were okay. He sat you down on the sofa drying your hair.

"You didn't have to come in the middle of the night to see me Y/n you could get sick!"

"I know..."

"Than why?"

I-i have an answer about how I feel."

She looked down at her shaken hands he wrapped a bigger towel around your small form that's when she looked up at him you face was red and you had tears in your eyes.

"Y/n-"

Before he could finish he was cut off by you kissing him on the lips he froze your lips were so soft and fit against his perfectly. He responded back eyes closing hands on your hips he was in cloud nine. You pulled away starring at him with a shy smile.

"I love you Clark Kent." She touches his cheeks pulling him in for a deeper kiss which he of course answered too by pull her to his lap laying her back on the sofa removing his lips from hers to stare into her eyes he smiles moving hair from your face.

"I love you too."

That's when they went back to kissing her hands going through his hair and his hands on her body removing her wet clothes, he didn't want to let her go not ever all these months of not seeing you he definitely was gonna make up for lost times.

[interestinglittlerelationship]

We Should Kiss Like Real People Do

It’s finally time! This was so much fun! @jatpfebfanfest

This is for @princessmuk

“Wait, wait, wait, explain this to me again?” Julie says, tilting her head at him in confusion.

“Aragagh,” Alex groans, “I’ve explained it twice already,” he tilts his head at her, “Shouldn’t you know all about this, already? Willie is basically your brother.”  

Julie flings herself down next to him, “I know about the stupid family reunion thing, yeah, but why are you going?”

“Because Willie doesn’t want to go alone,” Alex supplies.

“Right, but…” and then she seems to stop herself, “You know what? Never mind. So, Willie asked you to be his fake boyfriend, and you said yes?”

Alex face plants into Julie’s pile of pillows, “Yes,” he mutters. This does nothing to block out the sound of Julie’s giggles, “I hate you,” he adds, rolling over and hugging a pillow to his chest.

After a moment he feels Julie’s arm press up against his side, “I’m sorry, Lexi,” she says seriously, “this is just a situation so ridiculous only you could have managed to end up in it.”

“Thanks, that just make me feel loads better.” 

Julie sighs, “It’s really going to be okay, Alex.”

“You think? Because I think I’m gonna get my heart broken.”

“I’m fairly confident that’s not going to happen, besides you already said yes,” she points out.

“I know,” he whispers.

“So, what are you going to do?”

And that’s the thing, isn’t it? There’s nothing he can do. Willie is his best friend and he needs help. Alex has to do this even if it destroys him, “I’m going to be Willie’s fake boyfriend.”

The time of his demise is delayed slightly by the fact this “favor” Willie asked him for is actually a week away. For someone with a normally functioning brain that might be a good thing, but Alex is far too anxious, and simply comes up with ten new ways it could go horribly wrong with each passing day.

His friends are unsurprisingly the opposite of helpful. Bobby straight up laughs in his face when he finds out, pats him on the shoulder, and says, “Good luck with that.” Reggie gets really excited and insists that this is the start of Alex’s very own rom-com, and then goes on a long-winded tangent about movies where the two main characters start fake dating and end up falling in actual love. Luke, at least, seems properly sympathetic but offers exactly zero practical advice.

Willie, for his part seems remarkably unconcerned about the many possible ramifications of this deal of theirs. Then again, Willie seems remarkably unconcerned about most things. It’s part of the reason Alex likes him so much, Willie balances him out somehow. Calms the whirlwind in his brain.

Willie is holding his hand.

Honestly, he’s having a hard time focusing on anything other than that fact. And he knows it’s for show, that they’re walking up Willie’s uncle’s driveway and someone might see, but none of that matters because Willie is holding his hand.

“This is going to be easy. You already know everything about me and they know practically nothing. You probably won’t even have to lie that much,” Willie is saying and Alex is nodding like a bobble head even though he’s only half listening, “Besides,” Willie adds, “it’s only for the day anyway.”

And that snaps Alex right back to reality. Because tomorrow he’s going to have to go back to pretending like he isn’t in love with his best friend. And he’s going to have to pretend like that fact isn’t slowly killing him. And none of this is real and Alex sort of wants to cry.

Instead, he says, “Right, no big deal.”

Willie yanks them to a stop on the bottom step, tugging his lip between his teeth for a second, “Seriously, Lexi, thank you for doing this.” And then he does the most unbelievable thing and reaches up to tuck a strand of hair behind Alex’s ear. It does absolutely nothing since his hair is not actually long enough to stay put, but Alex melts anyway.

“Hey,” he says, squeezing Willie’s hand, “anytime.”

Willie blushes, “Yeah,” he breathes, turning away, “um, ready to do this?”

Alex shrugs, “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

As Willie introduces him around, Alex starts to relax. Really, pretending to be Willie’s boyfriend is not nearly as hard as he thought it would be. They hold hands and when anyone asks how they met, they tell the truth, “We were friends first.” Willie calls him truly ridiculous pet names like, “Hotdog” and “Honeyboo” which make some of his aunts coo at them.

Willie had basically said that he didn’t want to go to this party alone because all his relatives were awful, but that he’d only be allowed to bring someone if they were dating.

And yeah, Willie’s aunts and uncles are all a little distant and awkward, but seems mostly unbothered by their snubs.

His cousins, on the other hand are admittedly sort of awful, the kind of spoiled rich kids who think their money entitles them to look down on everyone else, but they pretty much leave the two of them alone too.

Willie’s mom had been the black sheep of the family, a free-spirit artist, who had run off with Willie’s dad right out of high school. Willie had never seen his mom’s family growing up, but after she and his dad died in a car accident, his attendance at these yearly reunions had become mandatory out of some twisted sense of duty or something. The rest of the year, Willie lives with his dad’s best friend, Ray, who is apparently not allowed to attend either.

Alex isn’t quite sure how to help, but Willie never once lets go of his hand, so maybe just being there is enough.

It’s a long afternoon, but only slightly painful, and then suddenly they’re climbing back into the car.

It takes a few seconds for Alex to realize that Willie hasn’t actually put the key into the ignition, or for that matter, let go of Alex’s hand.

“Hey,” Alex murmurs, “you okay?”

Willie drops his head onto Alex’s shoulder, “It’s just so exhausting, you know?”

Alex hums, because he doesn’t really.

“They’re all so fake, being all polite, and acting like they want to know me, but they didn’t fucking want me.”

Alex realizes then that Willie is crying, and he tries to shift so he can pull him into a hug, but Willie won’t let go of his hand.

“And I love Ray, I do, and it’s not like I want to live with them, but they spent my whole childhood pretending I didn’t exist and then when they were forced to acknowledge me, they still didn’t want me. And I lied to you. Ray usually goes with me and they wouldn’t have cared if I’d brought a friend as long as they could put on their little ‘happy family show,’ but I wanted you, and I wanted to be able to hold your hand, and now I don’t want to let go because I love you so much, but you probably don’t want me either.”

And Alex is, well, Alex is trying to wrap his head around the fact that his whole entire world just got rewritten. Because even if that was a bunch of heartbreaking word salad, he’s pretty sure Willie just said he loved him.

And this is why he doesn’t respond nearly fast enough, giving Willie the time to realize what he just said and freak out about it. Honestly, it’s all very Alex of him.

He tries to pull away, but this time, it’s Alex who won’t let go.

“Hey,” he says softly, and when Willie just keeps fighting against him, he says it louder, “Hey!” Willie freezes, staring at him, wide-eyed, “I’m, like, stupid in love with you too.”

Willie blinks, and Alex has a feeling his whole world is rewriting itself too.

“Oh,” he says, “Well, that’s convenient.”

Alex smiles at him, “Yeah, it is, isn’t it?”

The sit there smiling at each other, and they’re both crying still too, but none of that matters because Willie loves him.

“So, um, I’m gonna kiss you now,” Willie whispers.

“Okay,” Alex whispers back.

[prettygirluriel777]

this one's a little long oopsie

day twenty to twenty-six

sorry for not posting in like a week 😭 i wanted to have significant news to share instead of just "haven't tapped in yet" and while it's true that i haven't,, i've discovered a method that i'm really comfortable with and i honestly believe tonight is the night !!

so i start off w this meditation which is meant to make you feel like you're floating (sound familiar ?) and then i have this theta track queued to play right after !! i do my best to maintain the feeling i got from the meditation while the track is playing and the next part is arguably the most important for me.

i'm someone who,, by nature,, is always looking into the deeper meaning of things and possible results / effects and how things tie into other things so it's always been a little difficult to affirm stuff like "i am pure consciousness" to help tap into the void bc my mind automatically starts bringing up a bunch of questions,, so i brought states into it.

i'm not sure how it happened,, i kind of just ended up there and i can say without a doubt that i'm really glad i did. i believe in the idea that we are all pure consciousness expressing ourselves in a human form and because of that affirming that i was pure consciousness always made me a bit skeptical bc what exactly was the difference between being pure consciousness while tapping into the void and being pure consciousness in my everyday life ? (and yes you could say that the word 'pure' was capable of being a differentiator but that didn't really do it for me). this brought me back to a conversation i had w myself yesterday that really helped me have a strong position on the nature of my being.

to myself,, i am everything and to others,, i am human but regardless of all that,, i am in truth pure consciousness (take a shot every time i use this phrase 😭). i remembered coming to this conclusion and after that,, this edward art post came to mind (i've literally never read his stuff before LMAO). specifically the part where he mentions that when neville was imagining himself back in new york the outer world didn't exist (or smth along those lines). this really resonated w me and i couldn't help but draw a connection between forgetting about the outer world and the void.

now this is where states come in. armed with everything i'd learned the previous day i was finally able to create the difference i'd been searching for; as opposed to affirming "i am pure consciousness" i began to affirm "i am in the state of pure consciousness" which,, for me,, entailed not only completely disregarding the outer world but also truly embodying the truth of my existence. in addition to this,, i now think my day-to-day can be summarized by the affirmation "i am in the state of pure consciousness in human form".

this might sound silly and look like overcomplicating to a lot of people but to me it actually really simplified things for me and helped me create peace w so much. this isn't really meant to be an advice post so i'm sorry if you don't get what i'm saying. i'm just putting my personal experience out there but i'd be glad to talk about it in dms w any of you !!

one way or another,, my next post will be my success story so look out for that 💪🏼

[capriclonus]

I am in awe of your writing Cap. I can't believe how deftly you shift the emotional compass from sentence to sentence in a way that is totally honest and believable. It's absolutely mesmerising.

I'm new to fanfiction writing, and I'm just grateful that there are folks like yourself to learn from and inspire both to write and hopefully become better at the craft.

Do you have any advice for someone posting a smut scene for the very first time? I've known it's been coming up in my fic for a long time and next week is the week it'll finally be posted - and I'm already that anxious!

oh my god i am---------oh my god???????

oh my goodness gracious------

(my tiny gay heart cant take this)

Seriously, I don't know what to say to this. I don't know what I can say to this. This has blown my brains out. Thank you? Thank you. Oh my goodness gracious gay god, thank you!!!!

Okay, so *ahem* I honestly don't know how good I am at giving writing advice, but I will do my best for you. I'm going to put it beneath a cut off because, fuck me, can I waffle.

First off, let me say that if your writing is as eloquent as this ask is (and I'd bet my mother it is) then I'm sure your writing is already wonderful. Everything that we post is ultimately a learning experience and the more we write the more we find our style.

As for smut, well, that's always a daunting thing. It's a very vulnerable experience, and every single person who posts it is commendable. I know every single writer goes through the ball of anxiety that is first-time smut posting. Stupid as it sounds, the only way to do it is to do it. But I also find it very helpful to have someone I trust - a friend or a beta who understands my writing style and headspace - read it through first and offer their opinion. Nothing too critical because I find that doing that with an experience as scary and vulnerable as first-time smut can really put the writer off posting anything at all related to it. Also, don't be afraid to admit that nervousness to your readers; a lot of readers are really kind-hearted and, if they hear you are nervous about the scene, I am sure they will make extra effort to bolster your confidence in the comments. And if they don't, come get me, and I will smash their face across the keyboard until something positive comes out (I'm joking. Sort of.)

Ultimately (and this is the oldest line in the book I'm really not original), we write for ourselves. The advice I offer now is the same whether it's smut or not: if you are happy with what you've written, if you like what you've written, you've nailed it. That's all that matters. Obviously, we all love the crazed dopamine hit we get from comments and kudos and I won't feed you a line that they don't matter because they do to a lot of people, myself included. As fanfic writers we want people to like our writing, and we do what we do out of a passion that we want to share and a desire to connect to others that share that passion. I find that, at the end of the day, even if a fic of mine has low engagement, I can walk away happy because I am proud to have written it. That's what matters.

If you are lacking someone you trust enough to read it and be vulnerable with, then I hope you know I am happy to take that space, should you want me to. I'm always happy to help put more smut in the world lmfao! Also, if you want to dm me your fic when you've posted the smut, please do, because I will be there with an outpour of support in your comments.

(I am sorry if this wasn't overly helpful, I am writing this at 1am following a caffeine-fuelled writing spree. But I do find smut is one of those experiences where you just have to fuckin go for it, ass out. That confidence grows with time, and it starts with publishing your first piece.)

[ladyantiheroine]

I’m Hers Now

Summary: Renfield is in love, and Dracula is not happy about it.

Pairing: Renfield x fem!reader

Requested by @kpopgirlbtssvt

You’re walking a dangerous line, Renfield.

Two days had past and Renfield still smelled the blood of Matthew Ryder. He’d been feeding mortals to Dracula long enough that he learned to forget people once they were gone. Exorcise their ghosts before they had a chance to haunt him. But the memories of his most recent kill were still fresh to him.

Because that kill’s girlfriend was weeping right in front of him.

“I just don’t know what’s up with me,” Y/N said. “I mean…I know I’ve talked about him a lot, and I know I haven’t always said the best things about him, but…that doesn’t mean I want to feel happy about his disappearance, right?”

Y/N had attended the support group as long as Renfield had. The common thread in all her stories were the same: Her boyfriend, Matthew. While Renfield didn’t like to judge, none of Y/N’s stories suggested the young man was much a prince. Gaslighting, manipulation, narcissism, every abusive boyfriend cliche wrapped into one man.

And just like Caitlyn’s boyfriend weeks before, Renfield decided he was just the kind of man to feed to the world’s most infamous vampire.

But while Caitlyn seemed happy at her boyfriend’s sudden disappearance, Y/N seemed more torn up. It spoke to the young lady’s good heart that she felt pity even for someone who had hurt her.

It was part of why Renfield was so drawn to her. After living with the lord of darkness for so long, he was drawn to anyone with a spark of light in them.

Y/N sniffled and rubbed her face on her sleeve. Renfield reached into his pocket, pulled out a handkerchief, and offered it to her. She turned to face him, round eyes shimmering.

“Thank you,” she said. She took the handkerchief and blew her nose. “I don’t know, it’s just…I’m not a bad person, right? That I don’t feel terrible that he’s gone?”

“Of course not, Y/N,” Mark said. Everyone else in the group nodded. “You clearly care that he’s okay. His disappearance had nothing to do with you.”

Well, it technically did. If Y/N hadn’t spent weeks telling stories about her boyfriend’s latest assholery, Renfield would have never found Dracula’s next meal.

“Maybe this is an opportunity,” Renfield said.

Everyone in the group turned to him, including Y/N. Despite all the faces, it was Y/N’s that made Renfield feel shy to speak.

“I mean, maybe this is a sign,” he said. “If you feel happier when he’s not around…maybe that’s the final sign that he’s not for you. Move on. Let the authorities deal with his disappearance. Take this time to make plans going forward.”

He shyly brought his gaze to Y/N’s. She was looking at him with soft, soothed sort of gaze.

“That’s excellent advice, Mr. Renfield,” Mark said. “Sometimes, it takes a sudden disruption for us to realize what we need. Sometimes, you need distance from a relationship in order to heal from it.”

Mark glanced down at his watch.

“Well, I’m afraid that’s all the time we have for now,” he said. “Thank you so much to everyone for coming. Same time next week.”

As everyone stood up to leave, Y/N approached Renfield. Despite them being the group for weeks, the two had never spoke one-on-one before.

“Hey,” she said. “I just wanted to say…thanks for the advice,”

“Oh,” Renfield said. “Of course. I’m glad it helps.”

“Honestly, knowing Matthew, he’s probably doing something illegal. If the cops find him, they’ll probably just take him to jail. Then I won’t even have to try breaking up with him.”

Renfield gave a shaky smile.

“Silver-lining to everything, I guess,” he said.

“Yeah.”

A small smile sprouted on Y/N’s face.

“By the way,” she said. “I know it’s a bit late in the afternoon, but…do you wanna get coffee right now?”

~

What the fuck are you doing, Renfield?

It was a real he had set for himself early on: Don’t get close to those close to the target. Murders are often comitted by those close to the victim, so befriending Matthew Ryder’s girlfriend would be like Ted Bundy befriending his latest victim’s sibling. The goal to stay away from the crime scene, not tapdance around it.

And yet, despite all better judgements, Renfield agreed to accompany Y/N to the new coffee shop down the block from the church. More than that, he ended up chatting with her to closing time and nibbling through several croissants in the process. Then, he ended the evening walking her home to her apartment.

He tried to rationalize it. She was still hurt afte losing Matthew, and he of all people owed it to comfort her, right? Not to mention protecting her in case any more trouble came her way. Eventually, she’d move on from Matthew and the two would have no reason to speak to each other again.

That’s what he told himself the first time.

~

Before long, Renfield lost count of how many coffee chats he’d had with Y/N. It became a ritual for them after every support group meeting. From there, coffee chats turned into movie night and trips to the zoo and weekend spent viciously annhilating each other in Mario Kart.

It was official. Renfield and Y/N were friends now.

Best friends, possibly. The first one Renfield had in centuries. It felt so strange. For the longest time, Dracula was only deep relationship he had. The constant travel and surveillance from the vampiric count meant Renfield could never get close to anyone. Lest he risk putting his human companion in danger.

But Renfield ahd managed to keep Dracula fed for the weeks following Matthew’s death. This kept him satisfied enough to not go hunting after Renfield, which was the onyl way Renfield cold justify all the time spent with Y/N. As long as Dracula was appeased, he could separate the two enough for no problems.

It was a risk. But it was one Renfield couldn’t resist. Because he enjoyed his time with Y/N too much to stop, and he couldn’t bare the thought of returning to life of lonely servitude to a cruel master.

So that’s what his life was. Wandering through aquariums after support group with Y/N by day, and hunting and killing innocent people by night for Dracula.

~

Renfield didn’t know when he got off-balance. At what point he started neglecting Dracula in favor of spending more and more time with Y/N. But in what felt like the blink of an eye, weeks more had past and he hadn’t fed Dracula a single drop.

And the worst part? His friendship with Y/N hadn’t faded.

It got worse.

And by worse, he meant he was falling in love with her.

And even worse, she seemed to reciprocate.

One afternoon after group, Renfield and Y/N decided to go watch a movie at his apartment. It was the first time he was letting her see his place, and the occasion felt more momentous than it should have been.

“I didn’t have time to clean the place,” Renfield said. “So, apologies if it’s a tad messy.”

“I doubt you could be messier than me,” Y/N said.

Renfield chuckled, and as they continued to walk, hs fingers brushed against hers. He didn’t mean to, but in the next second, Y/N thread her fingers between his. Her hand was soft and warm and it made her heart flutter. He looked at Y/N, and she gave him a soft smile.

“Is this okay?” she asked.

No. It wasn’t. Do you not know what you’re getting yourself into?

“Yes, it’s good,” Renfield said.

The two reached his door and Renfield slid his room key inside. As soon as he opened the door, he knew something was wrong. There was a scent in the air. A rotten, decaying scent that only came from one person.

Renfield let go of Y/N’s hand. He turned to her.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“I…umm…” Renfield said.

He glanced down at the welcome mat by the door. Fuck, the mat. The bastard got in because fo the god damn mat.

Renfield was even stupider than he thought.

“Listen,” he whispered. “I’m sorry, I know this is sudden, but I need you to leave right now.”

“Why?” Y/N asked, her eyes confused and a little hurt. “What about our movie night?”

It crushed Renfield’s heart to see her looking at him like that. But he had to protect her. He’d endangered her enough just getting close. He needed her gone before she joined Matthew in the same gaping maw.

“Y/N,” Renfield said, trying to stay calm. “Listen, you have to trust me, it’s not safe here right now.”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Why?”

“It’s a lot to explain and…you don’t believe me…”

Y/N looked even more hurt.

“Why would you think that? We’ve told each other everything, right?” She grabbed his shoulders. “Robby, what’s going on? Why can’t you just let me inside? Why--”

Suddenly, there was a gust of wind that pushed Renfield backwards into the apartment and shut the door behind him. He quickly rushed to his feet and and flew open the door. He glanced down the hall just in time to see Dracula, Y/N flung over his shoulders, as he skittered away.

“No!” Renfield cried. “Stop!”

Dracula paused, and turned to face him. His eyes glowed red and his mouth spread into a wicked, toothy smile.

“Such pretty prey you’ve found me, Renfield,” he said. “This will make up for your weeks of neglect.”

With that, the count disappeared into the distance.

~

Maybe she’d been asleep for minutes. Maybe she’d been asleep for days. All Y/N knew was that her whole body ached when he eyes finally fluttered open. The first thing she saw was a window, showing a black sky. She turned her head to see orange walls covered in inspiration posters and a soft pillow under her head.

“What…” she mumbled.

“Oh, thank god.”

Y/N turned her head. Renfield was seated by the bed beside her, his sweater and face splattered with red. Her heart leapt in her throat and she seat up quick.

“Renfield!” she said. “What the--”

Before she could finished, Renfield threw his arms around her. He squeezed her tight, his eyes tearing up and staining the sleeve of her shirt.

“You’re okay,” he whimpered. “You’re okay…I thought he killed you…”

“Who…”

Y/N groped her brain for memories. She remembered arriving at Renfield’s apartment for a movie night. Then, all of sudden, he started panicking and telling her to leave. After that, she saw the wisp of a black shadow and she was floaitng above the air right before she passed out.

Renfield released her and gripped her hands in his.

“Y/N,” he said. “I’m…I’m so, so sorry. This is all my fault.” He inhaled a deep breath, then let it out. “I have a lot to explain.”

~

It was past midnight and on top of being exhausted, your brain was fuzzy from everything you’d been told.

“Dracula,” you said. “As in…the Dracula?”

Renfield pursed his lips and nodded.

“I’ve served him for centuries,” he said. “But I never had the strength to vanquish him until now.” He glanced down at his bloody sweater. “As you can tell it was…a messy process.”

“You killed a vampire,” Y/N said. “That’s…incredible.”

“Well, my good friend Rebecca certainly helped,” he said. He squeezed your hands tight. Despite his pale skin, his touch was warm. “I was afraid to befriend you, because I didn’t want you to get hurt. But really, I should have just been honest from the start. And more so, I should have killed that bastard a long time ago.”

He bit his lower lip.

“Y/N,” he said. “After so long, I thought I had forgotten what it was like to really love someone. Not fear, and not just serve them, but love them.” He lifted his eyes to hers. “You reminded me that’s there’s still something in this cold body of mine. If you hadn’t, I would still be a slave to Dracula for centuries more.”

Y/N’s face burned hot. She was feeling so much as once it was almost overwhelming.

“Renfield,” she said.

He pursed his lips and tugged at his sweater.

“I should change,” he said. He wiped the crimson, copepry smear on his mouth. “This bloody blood isn’t helping, is it?”

Before he could get up and leave, Y/N stopped him. She grabbed him by the font of his blood-stained sweater and pulled his blood-stained lips to her. She tasted the copper on his mouth, but she didn’t care. They sunk into each other, time melting into wax around. When they separated, Y/N pressed her forehead to his.

“I love you too, Renfield,” she said. “And I’m happy Dracula is gone.”

Renfield smiled. A smile of disbelief, of joy, of relief.

“I’m not his anymore,” he said. “I’m yours.

[polyamorouspunk]

So I (24, nonbinary) have been casually seeing this guy (38) that I've know for quite some time; I lost my virginity to him and it was fun and easy and honestly things had been great.

And then I was a little bit too high and confessed that I love him and he was super sweet in the moment and just held me and told me he's not comfortable saying the same because he's not sure

That was a couple weeks ago, the last time I spent the weekend. A few days ago I asked if he wanted to hang out again soon, but he didn't respond until today. He had a lot going on and also had to put his thoughts in coherent order, which I can respect. But reading his texts this morning has fucked up my whole day.

He's been really gentle in trying to let me down easy, I know he's still fucked up over his last relationship, and he's got two kids (both under 16) to think about; not to mention that I know he's worried about the age gap (he mentioned that I have so many possibilities ahead of me and I wanted to throw my phone).

I've got issues so I'm taking it really hard. Like this is definitely something I expected and yet I'm still super hurt. I don't really have anyone I'm comfortable talking about this with, and I'm sorry for dumping it all on you but I saw your little sleepover post and I could honestly use a hug and some positive vibes right now.

Okay okay okay so I know you know this is a LOT to unpack.

Mkay so I am 24 also (hi) some form of not cis (hi) and do have a crush on someone a fair bit older than me (33, not 38 though).

I love the idea of being with older men. The last guy I was seeing was 2 years older than me so like 26 now. Loved it. Love when older guys are interested in me. He was also going through a divorce and his son had just been born. It was a lot. I liveblogged the whole thing on here.

Dating older men comes with issues like that. And I have bpd so as soon as I FP someone yeah I’m instantly in love with them.

Dating older men can be hard when they say things about your future and shit like that- and I GET it, like it IS good advice even if you don’t want to hear it. I mean, when WE were under 16 how many people gave US good advice we didn’t want to hear at the time.

It sucks when you fuck up a good thing you had by confessing that you’re in love with someone who is not mutually in love with you. It reeeeally fucking sucks. Because either you hold that inside of you and you push it down and push it down and push it down, or you finally release it, let it go, and it fucks everything up.

There is no reason for you not to be hurt/upset about it even if you did expect it. Grieve. Let yourself grieve. Come into my inbox and dump all of this on me. Let people around you help you heal. Let me send you some love. I am holding your hand. I am telling you to some degree I have been there. To some degree I am there. And I know it gets better. Some day you’ll be like me, and you’ll be driving to work, and you’ll put on a new Fall Out Boy album that just came out, and you’ll cry, and you’ll realize through all the bad things, through all the shit and the hurt, this is why you stayed alive. You lived to be 23 so that you can hear Fall Out Boy put out new music.

And then you’ll be 24 and you’ll meet someone and they’ll change your world. And you think about how amazing it is that someone like this touched your life in some way, and that you can touch yours back. And you’ll meet up with old friends and make new ones.

And we’re so young, we’re SO young. It’s fucking wild to imagine this year (or next year) we’ll be half way to 50. That’s batshit insane. But like oh my god. The healing process that I’m going through is beautiful. Sure, there is a lot of stress. I’m failing the last class I need to graduate. My job stress is through the roof. I’m chronically ill. But outside of that I truly am continuing to live my best life every day.

I don’t know if you plan to try and keep on seeing him casually or if this really is the end for you. Either way this is just a bump in the road. 38 is so young too. We’re going to be okay. It’s a bad day. It’s gonna be a bad week. It might even be a bad month. Hell it might even be a bad year. But goddamn it if they don’t mean it when they say it’s not a bad life. It’s supposed to be almost 70 later today. I’m going to go work outside in the sun. My heartbreaks can’t stop me from creating art that I love. I saw a butterfly yesterday. Life is beautiful. Love is beautiful. Emotions are messy. They are disgusting. I hate them. But they’re poetic too.

Hell maybe this is all some Kumbaya bullshit I’m spouting. Idk. But I believe it. I really do. It takes work to believe in this shit. But it feels so much better when you do. Probably why cults work so well. Anyway!

It’s amazing that you got a chance to be with someone who is 38! I hope you look back on it fondly in a few years. And if you don’t then you’ll look back on yourself with kind eyes and think that at least in that moment you were happy and felt like it was what was best for you.

[salt-pepper-jolex]

No Matter What

A sequel to Powdered Donuts, Princess Crowns, and Bubbles; in which Jo has a nervous breakdown about having this baby and has a scare, but it ends up okay.

Side note: I'm sorry for this roller-coaster. I promise there's happiness eventually. New chapter coming soon! Okay, I'm done, enjoy!

Jo's entire body shook as her thumb hovered over Alex's number, tears falling uncontrollably from her eyes. After a moment, she decided to just press the call button. Then, the familiar voice message rang in her ears. "You've reached the voicemail of Dr. Alex Karev. Sorry I couldn't come to the phone. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."

Despite the exciting week before, Jo couldn't shake the worry and unsteadiness that came with welcoming a baby into the world.

She chose to hang up the phone, not wanting to bother him. She scrolled up to find Meredith's number, and pressed the call button again, putting Mer on speaker. One ring. Two. Three. Finally, on the fourth ring, a familiar voice filled the room.

"Jo?" Mer's voice, filled with an even mix of concern and worry, rang out.

"Hey. I need to talk to you. It wouldn't hurt if Pierce and Shepherd were there too."

Meredith, sensing the pain in her voice, offered for Jo to come over.

"That'd be nice. I'll be there in twenty." She replied, a wave of relief crashing over her. She'd needed to tell someone about...whatever this was.

When she got there, she noticed Mer, Maggie, and Amelia waiting.

"Thank you for doing this." Jo's voice held so much pain and grief that no one else but the three women in front of her could fix. She looked up to them, like a little girl to her big sisters.

"What's going on?" Amelia spoke gently as they all sat down across from Jo, careful not to sound like they were interrogating her because they knew she had asked them to hear her and listen.

"I'm, um, pregnant," Jo said, her voice soft and small, laced with sadness and panic.

"Does Alex know?" Maggie asked, careful not to assume anything.

Jo only nodded her head, as if speaking would surface emotions that she had spent her whole life suppressing.

"How do you feel about it?" Meredith asked, noticing the way Jo picked at her nails, and fidgeted with her ring.

Jo shrugged. "Honestly, I don't know. This is the first time I've been pregnant in 12 years. And Alex doesn't know because the day I planned to tell him, I lost it. I shut him out, but we worked hard, and got here. Now, I don't know what to tell him. Because I know I can't put him, or us for that matter, through that again."

Amelia moved next to Jo, wrapping her arms around the woman that felt like a fragile little girl in that moment.

Knowing the women would listen, she kept going, "It'll break Alex's heart. And the worst part is Luna was so happy, and I don't know how to tell her that she might not get a little sister or brother."

"Jo, don't think for a second that he won't support you in whatever you choose to do. And yes, Luna's young. But she's also smart. She gets that from you and Alex. She'll understand."

In that moment, Amelia gave Jo strength through words no one else could find to tell her. They'd all had losses, Maggie had been broken before, and Meredith knew her pain better than anyone, but Amelia gave Jo the best possible advice, and the strength she needed right then and there.

Suddenly, everyone went quiet, with small smiles. Jo looks behind her to find Alex.

"Hi. What are you doing here?" Jo's voice was impossibly tiny, but only Alex could see the fear in her eyes.

"You weren't home, so I came here. Luna's with Robbins and Torres."

"I know, thank you for that." She laughs, humorlessly, and Alex picked up on it. "How much did you hear?"

"I heard most of it, but that doesn't matter. C'mere." He holds her hands before pulling her into a tight hug.

"I want Luna."

"I know you do, babe. What do you say we go get her and then, we can talk about our options over ice cream. What do you say?"

"I'm lucky to have you, baby."

"I love you. More than everything else in this world. I love you. And Luna. And this baby, but you need to hear me when I say this. I am in your corner. No matter what. Okay?"

"Okay." Jo said, knowing Alex's words were sincere.

"Let's go get our girl. We have sundaes to make."

After a series of thank yous, hugs, and heartfelt see you laters, Jo and Alex left. Mer and Maggie listened as Amelia started.

"We're lifelines now. We have to be there for them."

"I have surgery with Alex, I'll see what I can find out." Maggie offered before Meredith informed the both of them.

"I'll make sure Jo stays awake because that baby will be exhausting, knowing Alex."

Mer turns to see Zola, Bailey, and Ellis on the stairs.

"Auntie Jojo and Uncle Alex are having a baby?" Ellis asks.

"Well, we don't know, honey." Mer says, kind of stunned.

Maggie continues for her, "That's up to them."

"But, no matter what, you cannot say anything to anyone about this, okay?" Amelia says firmly.

All three kids nod in response and scatter to get ready for bed.

Back at the loft, Alex and Jo talked.

"I finally got her down. Can we talk now?" Jo whispered, her voice laced with nerves and panic.

"Of course. Hey, you have nothing to worry about. I promise, whatever you choose, you got me. I'm here for you, and if it comes down to it, we'll figure out what to tell to Luna." He moves to wrap his arm around her, then pulling the both of them up to do dishes.

"Thank you." She said as she started the water, although Alex tilts his head, a puzzled expression littering his face.

"For what?" He asked, his curiosity genuine as he scrubbed a plate.

"For being so understanding about it, and being so good to me."

"Of course. I love you, and I'm there for you. Always."

"Good, because I'm keeping this baby. If you're up for a mini-me." Jo's face lit up with a fragile smile that morphed into a solid one as she saw Alex's eyes light up.

"Really?" He asked, his eyes glittering with happy tears.

"We're gonna have a baby, baby."

The next morning, Amelia, Maggie, and Mer gather at work. They pass by Alex, who normally would be grumpy by now, but had a lightness to his walk as he checked on patients.

Jo had been wobbly and tired all morning due to morning sickness. But happy, nonetheless.

"Blech, this baby will not give me a break." Jo said, her face a touch pale as she leaned against the wall.

Amelia saw the sweat beading on Jo's forehead.

"Here," Amelia handed her ginger cough drops. "Trust me."

Jo wrapped her in a hug before falling to the ground.

"Jo! Hey, stay with me!" Amelia shouted, her voice tense. "I need some help here! Pulse is thready, breathing is shallow," she announced to a nearby Maggie.

"Let's get her on a gurney, page Hunt and Bailey," Maggie announced.

In the chaos, they hadn't seen Alex exit the patient room next to them.

"What happened?" Alex asked, his question soft.

"We're not sure yet. Bailey and Owen are running tests in there for now."

"Okay." Alex's body was rigid, his demeanor instantly changed.

"Hey, go see Luna. We'll page you when they're done." Maggie said calmly as Amelia got paged.

Alex nodded as he walked away to go see his Moonshine.

20 minutes later, Jo's eyes flickered as she woke up to bright lights and rails surrounding her on both sides. Alex, attuned to his wife, sat tall, informing her of the situation.

"Hey. You fainted in the hall. Your pressure was low and you had a thready pulse. Don't worry. You're okay." He held her hand, kissing it lightly.

But still, Jo's eyes shined with an unanswered question.

Alex, ever inclined, answered quietly, his eyes red and puffy. "Baby is fine, Robbins and DeLuca made sure."

"I'm glad, but that's not what I meant. How are you? I know that was scary." Jo asked, her voice raw.

"Honestly? That scared the hell out of me, but you're strong. I had a good feeling you'd be okay." His voice hung with a tone Jo couldn't quite place.

"Why does your voice sound like that? What's wrong with me?" Jo asks, her tone loaded with despair as her voice broke seeing Bailey walk in.

"Jo, after you fell, we did a work-up, and you were severely dehydrated, but we repleted your electrolytes and gave you fluids. You are okay. Your baby is okay. But, the surgery was hard on you. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to ask you to stay out of work for a few hours." Bailey's voice was heavy.

"Can I see Luna?"

"Of course."

"I'll go get her," Alex offered, his hand slipping away.

Bailey rushed to Jo's side as she saw the tears in Jo's eyes.

"Honey, what do you need? What can I do?" Bailey's response wasn't 'What's wrong?' and Jo was immensely grateful for it.

"All I did was work a shift, one shift. I didn't think to stop and take care of myself, and my baby almost paid the price for it." Jo's voice was filled with a grief Bailey completely understood.

"Look. I'm not gonna lie. You pushed the limits of your body. That cannot happen again. If you promise to take care of your body and let us watch you, you can work so long as you listen to your body."

A smile broke out on Jo's face. "Deal."

"Mommy!" Luna squealed, because she hadn't seen her mom in nearly 4 hours.

"We'll leave you be." Bailey said, Alex and Jo eternally grateful.

"We owe her." Alex started, leaning his head on Jo's shoulder as he climbed into the bed with her.

"Big time," Jo said before focusing her attention to Luna.

"Hey, Moonshine." Jo used the nickname Luna knew only from Alex and her, motioning for Luna to come closer.

Soon after, Luna whimpered, hesitantly curling further into Jo's body.

"What is it, Luna-bug?" Jo said before mouthing a 'What happened?' to Alex, who only shrugged in response.

"Mama, you left me." Luna said, her big, bright eyes filled with unspilled tears.

"What are you talking about, baby girl?" Alex asks, coming closer to the loves of his life.

"You left me because you love the baby more than me."

"Oh, honey. Never. Never, ever, ever will Mommy and Daddy love anybody more than you. We love you and your baby brother or sister so, so much, and nobody can match that." Jo's words suddenly filled Luna with joy, evident by the smile on the little girl's face.

Two weeks later, and Jo was fully recovered.

"Promise me you'll take it easy today?"

"Obviously." Jo knew her husband was just being careful, but even she noticed the involuntary sharpness in her voice. "Sorry."

"Hey, don't worry about it. I get it." And he truly did. The words, seemingly insignificant, made her melt.

Through shaky breaths and watery smiles, she spoke.

"Thank you."

"Of course."

"No, Alex. I mean it. Thank you. For this, for Luna, for- for giving me a chance at having a baby again. For all of it."

"Jo. You know I'd do anything for you. Getting to give you a baby was just an added bonus," he smirked, waggling his eyebrows.

"You are terrible."

"But you love me anyway. I love you, Jo." He bridged the space between them, putting his forehead to hers.

"I love you. I can't believe we're having a baby," Jo spoke mesmerized as awe filled her voice.

That night, the excitement wouldn't wear off, and if Jo was honest, she didn't want it to. And neither did Alex. They were the happiest people on earth, and nothing could take that away.

fin.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you so, so, so much to everyone who reads this, reblogs, or even looks at it. Put prompts in comments, and tell me what you think!

xo, Nikki.

Also, here's chapter 2!

https://www.tumblr.com/salt-pepper-jolex/759121165155516416/mo-matter-what?source=share

[medicallymercury]

Just seen the Casualty spoilers for next week, I don't know how to describe my feelings. The first Teddy-related spoiler made me so physically excited I had to start jumping around my living room to be able to keep reading. The second one made me throw my phone across the room. Mixed feelings and general nausea.

The first one? More than I even hoped for from this episode. I honestly just expected that this episode would be him in his feelings, maybe telling Paige about it but probably Jodie (I'LL GET TO THAT). Instead, Jan asking him to come collect the ashes? How interesting it is for his characterisation that he still hasn't forgiven her enough for that? Paige finding out he only proposed because of Gethin? The role of family in Teddy's entire existence? MOST IMPORTANTLY: SAH TRYING TO GIVE HIM ADVICE. We're finally getting a Teddy and Sah scene, and it might go horribly but I honestly thought he'd just never talk to them again and the writers would try and pretend they'd resolved that storyline so I genuinely will cry about this. Expect so many edits. I am so fucking excited to see them interact again, I am shaking like one of those little dogs. I am foaming at the mouth. You will never shut me up.

The second one? Exactly what I dreaded would happen in this episode. I'm not happy about the Teddy/Jodie storyline and I don't shut up about that. I've said before that if I ship something I usually ship it forever and in the case of Teddy that means being very tied to Sah/Teddy/Paige for the good times and Sah/Teddy (no Paige) for the bad times, so I'll never really want to see him with anyone else (I'm not even really very big on Teddy/Paige with no Sah). To be fair, I can objectively see why this does kind of make sense in the moment if not on a whole. Teddy and Jodie are the hospital's nepo-babies and I say that as a joke but I do think it can put them in somewhat similar situations. On top of that, Teddy has just lost Gethin, Jodie has been kinda actively losing Max - I don't think their situations are that similar but I think they have more common ground with each other than they do with a lot of other people. So I see why this works but I don't care, I don’t have to be rational or reasonable about the medical drama if I don’t want to. (And incredibly subjectively? There is no main character in the show whose family life makes for more interesting comparsion with Teddy's than Sah's, even with this storyline.)

I'm not gonna lie and pretend I'll accept it as a plot choice because we've known about it for months now and I still don't like it. But I might've found a way to ignore it if they hadn't decided to make it happen this quickly. I always knew that the Gethin stuff would lead to the infidelity somehow, but I wanted an episode of Teddy grieving that didn't feature that. I wanted them to give Teddy and Jan a little time before they went that way. Just to properly establish things before rushing into a very new storyline, if anything. Even a brief acknowlegement in today's episode would've been better than this. I think I'm getting too into it because personal life things, there's a reason why Teddy is so me and let's keep it at that.

Oh and, yeah, I guess technically he does it under the assumption that he and Paige aren't together so it's kind of not cheating. But it is cheating, isn't it? And he's gonna keep at it. So I feel like even if it kind of isn't cheating now, it will be cheating eventually.

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

mixed mixed mixed feelings.

(Also, I forget how much I disagree with Casualty Twitter and then Teddy does anything and the response reminds me. I’m not saying he’s not done anything wrong, but the stuff he’s done wrong is so interesting and people there seem to just want him to disappear entirely if he won’t play the role of “Sah’s Best Friend” for them.)