#honest to god what baffles me more is the fact that HE HAS MOTIVATION TO DO A PAINTING AND FINISHED IT AT EASE??? AND SO QUICKLY TOO??

[soundleer]

drawing eachother🎨

(based on my 1am vc with @cilahax. im, once again, jevin while she's owakcx. owakcx's jevin doodle belongs to her too!)

[inkperch]

What I would change: El

starting off strong with my all around faves (and buying more time for me to actually finish BLs but shh), the Black Eagles.

And swinging right for the fences: Edelgard.

No notes, perfection.

Jokes aside, first thing that comes to mind is getting rid of the stupid joke options in her rat support. Like, god I hated that- I didn't pick either, on my playthrough, and remember that support as one of her more interesting ones, only to see most people remember it for El's scream being cute. Which. Sigh.

Other than that, absolutely give her supports outside of her own house+ Lysithea. Even more than the other Lords, she's the one who needed that, and it baffles me she didn't get it, they would not only allow her to get some juicy conflicting stances on her whole plan, but they would give the game a chance to justify why the other characters are willing to fight and die against their own country. As for the neat character stuff of her only supporting with those in her own house (The whole 'she doesn't let anyone get closer than the mask she wears' thing Edge of Dawn is all about-), just keep all of her other supports locked to post timeskip- hammering home that your actions have allowed her to let down her walls, just a little, and believe that people will follow her even when they know the real her-

Probably for the specifics I'd say the feargus four would need it most on their end of it (to explain why those three would follow her against their actual, genuine, friend in CF) (I'll go into that more when I finish BL when I do the Lions) , Leonie could get a pretty neat one about the fact El is. Kinda sorta absolutely complicit in Jeralts death, and shes going to honour her promise to Jeralt to look out for Byleth, but she's not best pleased with where that path has lead her. And just to even it out between BL and GD, Lorenz would have a fascinating tension with El, given that he'd be aligned with her whether he wanted to be or not, placing him on significantly more shaky ground on whether or not she trusts him-

(Mercedes would also be a good shout for a support, especially seeing as there's a certain someone to motivate you to recruit her on CF, but I feel that would, execution wise, likely end up too similar to Manuela's supports)

Which yeah, just a general aside, I'm absolutely giving all four (yeah four, I'm doing Ashen Wolves too) Lords more supports all around. Lord Supports are like, the place to explore the different routes differing character motives- (not applicable to AW, but doesn't need to be all four of them are getting more supports)

And, one that may be more of a hot take than above: downplay the fuck out of the romantic implications, replace them with Byleth filling the parental void in El's life. This is, to be completely honest, my read of canon anyway, the 'oh look, El's got a crush' moments all read a lot more of a general 'oh look, El's embarrassed to admit she's got a softer side,', and it really enhances the foil status between her and Rhea/Serios to read her relationship with Byleth as her seeing them as a parent and mentor- for. Somewhat self explanatory reasons. Rhea is commiting atrocities to get her mother back, El softens enough to commit far less atrocities because she has someone who can fill that role in her life (and also. She just really needs good parental figures yall-) (I have no doubt I'm gonna feel the same about Dmitri when I'm done with BL, these kids just need parents who aren't dead-)

Also: give her a way to get her hands on Seiros' stuff. Hell, give her only the shield (odds you're using SwordEl are low anyway), tweak Rhea's stats to accommodate and have her always discard it as a sign of just how much she's slipping on a CF route- she's so thoroughly stopped giving a damn about her own safety it's sword only time, get ready to be stabbed-

Let El find it on some routes as like a side quest or a map specific thing (The overall lack of late game optional quests does annoy me a bit overall)

Also on gameplay: pleeeeease let me use El's cool armour look as Wyvern Knight. I wanna see her cool badass armour but I can't because I like being able to move--

One last story note: give us more about El's siblings. Tell us about them, make us feel their absence in the narrative. Probably easier to do through Hubie than through El herself, given her absolute point blank refusal to dwell on the past, but if handled right could work as a show of her character development- she's no longer charging blindly into the future, shes willing to confront the pain of her past. (especially could work if you actually got to fight the Slithers, preferably pre-final-boss, and so get too actually see the part where she finally gets out of her abusers thumb which oh yeah that's a whole chunk of her character I would handle differently that I'm saving for when I get to talking about the Slithers-)

I think that's about it? And yes I did go back to doing these as one per character, it was getting long shh, gonna go through the BE in whatever the hell that order they default too in menus is meant to be, then the Golden Deer, Blue Lions, Ashen Wolves, the church, and then the Slithers (and then probably one or two 'oops I forgot to mention this' posts lol) gonna try and do at least one a day.

[wonwoonlight]

Minghao – only one bed + "It’s impossible to get rid of me.”

900~ words – a thousand starlights event

“You’re a menace, you know that?” Minghao sighs as he scoots himself closer to the wall, pretending like he’s reluctant to share his bed with you as if he doesn’t think about cuddling you to sleep ever since he’s started falling for you.

“You like me anyway,” you shamelessly grin at the guy, daring him to say otherwise. Minghao can’t even deny your words, because you are aware of his feelings towards you.

You’re a little too perceptive for your own good, something that Minghao notices since he’s moved in to rent the empty room in your apartment last semester. You probably notice he’s liked you before he even notices himself. So when you confront him about it because of the telltale he doesn’t even realize he’s been doing, he doesn’t see why he should deny it.

You’ve just coolly said he has the right to like whoever his heart calls to, but you didn’t say anything about whether or not you return his feelings. Minghao doesn’t feel like asking either, because, somehow, you both instead got much closer after that talk.

Minghao no longer has to pretend like he doesn’t hold a romantic affection towards you, and you’re no longer suspicious if the way he treats you well is because he likes you or because he has ulterior motives.

“They’ll go back tomorrow, right?” he asks again, putting his arm over his eyes. Gosh, he wish you can’t hear the way his heart is beating like it’s about to jump out of his chest because of your proximity.

“Yes Hao,” you roll your eyes without taking your eyes off your phone. “I didn’t know they’re gonna stay over too. I thought my sister was going to sleep in her friend’s place, not sleep here with her friend.”

Minghao shakes his head, still a little baffled by the turn of event. You’ve told him your sister is going to visit because her highschool friend is getting married and it’ll be too far if she goes from her place. This was where you get it wrong, you thought she said she was going to drop by and catch up with you then stay at her friend’s place--not drop by and stay here with her friend.

Anyhow, turns out her friend also doesn’t live in this part of Seoul and you can’t exactly kick them off when you’ve okay-ed your sister by mistake. So here you are, getting comfortable in Minghao’s queen sized bed though you fully realize the both of you are way too close compared to the size of his bed.

“Pretty sure I was promised a room for myself as a term for the rent,” he jokingly says, eyeing the way your hair is spread out underneath your head.

“What, you want me to sleep on the sofa?” you answer after you’re done with your phone, putting it on the bedside table.and then turning to fully face Minghao in front of you with a mock pout. “You’d let me sleep in the cold living room when you bed is big enough for both of us?”

“Just because I kind of ike you doesn’t mean I’d let you violate my privacy, you brat,” he flicks your forehead playfully, liking the situation a bit too much.

“Viola--oh God, Xu Minghao, you’re breaking my heart,” you shake your head as you pretend to wipe your nonexistent tear. Minghao watches all this with a fond smile, wondering how on earth did someone as quiet as him end up falling for someone like you. “Is this how you treat someone you kind of like?”

Minghao holds back a chuckle from your blunt words, amazed by how different you are to the people he’s usually attracted to. His past interests have always been more on the quiet side, if he’s being honest, so it’s a breath of fresh air to be falling for someone as cheery and as loud as you are.

“None of your business,” he answers as he turns around to face the wall, hiding the fact that he’s grinning to himself. “Go to sleep. You’re so noisy.”

“How is it none of my business if you literally like me?” you scoot closer to annoy him, shaking him from behind. “I’m not shutting up until you tell me.”

“I don’t like you anymore.”

“Noooooo,” you shake him harder, telling him you don’t believe him even a bit. “You can’t move on that quick. It’s impossible to get rid of me.”

Minghao finally lets out a laugh at this, and when he turns again to look at you, you’re both stunned in silence by how close the two of you are. He didn’t realize how much you scooted closer, but he quickly pulls back when his nose touch yours because of the sudden proximity.

You seem to be frozen, and it’s probably one of the few times Minghao has ever witnessed you being speechless. He can see the tip of your ears getting red too, and when you notice he’s about to tease you, it’s your turn to turn around before he can bother you more.

His soft laughter fills the room once you turn your back to him, and you wonder if you’re imagining the way his warmth feels so close against your back.

“Don’t worry,” he whispers, making chills run through your arms. “I’ve never treated anyone the way I treat you.”

©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved.

Taglist: @winterciella

[angsty-nerd]

Meta: Echo’s Big Fight in 3x09

Let's talk about the Big Echo fight. Because wandering around in the fandom this past week, I’ve seen a lot of very specific conclusions as far as what they were or weren't arguing about, and I’m not sure my take on that scene really aligns with other folks. So let me try to break it down a bit and give y’all an alternative perspective on it.

To start with, the scene opens with Max on edge because they're breaking and entering. Liz is singularly focused on the mission, and he's kinda freaking out. Instead of responding to his concerns, Liz gets straight to business.

"Ooh, ooh, this is interesting. Heath left Genoryx two days after I did. Must have realized he didn't need to be working underneath their corporate thumb."

Liz is kinda projecting here. Heath never once displayed any discomfort with Genoryx as a company the way that she did. He wanted her to stay. He wanted the resources there. We know these things as an audience, and Liz would too if she was thinking through the big picture at this point in time.

Max, on the other hand, doesn't know any of that. Here's what Max hears from Liz: he hears surprise. He hears Liz acknowledge that this is unexpected news. And right as he’s processing this unexpected reveal...Max sees Heath's Wild Pony t-shirt.

Weird coincidence #1 from Max's POV was Heath (the guy who is currently so pissed at Liz that he won't take her calls) supposedly rescuing Liz's science out of the good of his heart so that Genoryx doesn’t get their hands on it? This doesn't add up.

Weird coincidence #2 was Heath quitting Genoryx - a decision Heath made that Liz wasn't expecting.

The Wild Pony t-shirt is now the 3rd thing that doesn't add up. And if the t-shirt clue isn't adding up for you, see my post about it here:

The T-shirt is strike 3 for Max. He can't really pretend that he's not suspicious of Heath anymore. So he broaches the subject with her.

"How much do you know about this guy, Heath? How close were you?"

Max is feeling uncomfortable and looking for more information. He's trying to make the clue make sense. Why would Heath have the T-shirt? Does he have a connection to Roswell that Liz doesn't know about? And Liz doesn’t listen.

"This isn't the time to be jealous about a boy I met."

For all that Liz is clinical and on mission, she jumps very quickly to assuming that Max is NOT on mission. Yes, Max is inherently more emotional than she is. But throughout the episode he's been asking questions about Heath and NOT JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS. That's one of the keys to me here. Max really is trying to give her the benefit of the doubt about him.

At Liz's house, he asked about "the boyfriend" but he wasn't doing it in a jealous or judgy way. If anything it could almost be interpreted as concern. He started with "were you happy" and only when Liz kind of metaphorically admitted that any happiness was a façade...that's when he brought Heath into it. And yeah, Liz says that he impacted her life and helped her grow, but she didn't exactly express romantic feelings that would make Max jealous. So when she basically jumped straight to the jealousy assumption instead of actually discussing this with him, he starts getting worked up. Because she is not hearing him. She is not acknowledging that the facts they have found during this investigation are not adding up. So he is honest and blunt about what he's thinking.

"I'm just saying it's possible that he took your one-of-a-kind alien spores and quit, so that, just like you, he could use the research himself, free of Genoryx."

Max is the one who brings the science into this conversation. Not Liz. And he's not criticizing or questioning HER application of the science. He's questioning the trustworthiness of Heath. Because the lies are starting to jump out at him like a friggin’ neon light.

BUT — now that he's specifically brought up the science, he has her attention. Because Max questioning her science is HER sore spot. So what does she say back to him? Something kinda judgy.

"That grand trust speech certainly had a short shelf life."

Side note: I really don't think there actually was a "grand trust speech" in this episode. I can think of a few scenes where there might have been an opportunity for one. In particular during the milkshake scene when he admits to saving her tapes. But they actually don't talk about trust in that scene. They talk about having hard conversations. They talk about moving forward instead of looking backwards. But they don't talk about trust. My guess is that there might have been content cut for time at some point in this episode, that may have included some grand declaration from Max, but that's really just speculation on my part.

Regardless…Liz's response to Max bringing up the science is to basically accuse him of not trusting her. Which is not what he was saying. He was not questioning her use of the science. He was questioning her trust in Heath through the context of her science. So he elaborates on what he IS saying, and as he does, he's getting more and more worked up...because this does relate directly to his personal fears, and, frankly, his buried trauma that he's never properly addressed.

"I trust you. Okay? But I don't trust some guy I have barely met with a secret that could endanger me, could endanger my family and break the frickin' Internet if it came out."

Max doesn't know Heath, and he doesn't trust Heath with a secret that could endanger Michael and Isobel. His emotions are escalating, because now he's thinking about the science that scares him in the hands of a guy that all signs points to being potentially untrustworthy, and he's triggered.

BUT he doesn't back up his argument. He doesn't point out the very specific evidence he's identified that Heath is probably lying to Liz.

And Liz is inherently reactive and sometimes overly defensive (see 1x09 list of Liz's flaws). So even though he's focused on Heath, she immediately reacts defensively and takes it as a criticism of HER.

"You think I would let myself be conned?"

"No, I think you came out here looking for a partner, and it could blind you."

*deep breath* and this is where it starts to get personal. And rough. Max isn't entirely wrong here. But he also kind of is. Liz didn't choose Genoryx for partnership. She was looking for resources, freedom to do the science she wanted to do, and to save her father from deportation.

But partnership? Yeah, Liz wanted that. But she wanted that from MAX. She was looking for partnership in life, not in science.

And now that Max has thrown that direct criticism out there, Liz is going to throw a bomb right back at him.

"Just because you sabotaged me when I thought you were mine does not mean that Heath would take the same path."

Ouch. This is the hardest line in this whole scene for me to work with. Because it is combative. And purposefully hurtful.

BUT…she is NOT TALKING ABOUT HER SCIENCE. She has not said a single word about her science in this argument. She moved past that. She had the epiphany that she was wrong and she apologized (3x03). That is in the past for her.

This argument, for Liz, is about betrayal. This is about her believing that they were going to be partners and move their lives forward together (2x12), and right when she believed in that future, Max made another massive decision that directly impacted her life (just like he did in 1x13) instead of working with her to make big decisions together.

"And just because you changed the wallpaper doesn't mean you've mended your blind spots."

I really hate this "change the wallpaper" line. It feels like they're mixing metaphors. Liz called her life a commercial. Max is saying that she's changed her decor. Like...pick one and stick with it.

That aside… I think this barb is about her arrogance. Earlier in the scene, she seemed baffled at the idea that Max believes she could have been conned by Heath, because Liz is used to always being the smartest person in the room. She thought she was smarter than Diego and he figured her out. She believed her lab was secure, but Diego (possibly) got in. Sometimes, like most scientists, Liz is so bogged down in the complicated, brilliant details she’s thinking through, that she misses simple things that contribute to the big picture. And I think that's what Max is getting at here. In her arrogance, she believes that she can control the Heath situation. But she's not acknowledging the human factor here - that Heath is a person who may have his own unspoken ulterior motives driving him. Just like Diego did. She's just not seeing what Max is seeing.

BUT - again I'll say. Max is also not communicating the scope of the evidence he is collecting. They're both wrong here.

"I have learned my lessons, but you... oh, my God, you sound an awful lot like the guy who blew up my lab. So forgive me, but you're making it perfectly clear why I felt like I had to go and change the wallpaper."

This is the only line where Liz even comes close to talking about her science, but again, she's talking about his betrayal. She's talking about him undermining their partnership. She's talking about her need for a change of scenery from HIM.

And that’s when Max blows out the safe and they put the fight on hold to finish their investigation.

But, to sum it up…the fight was all about trust and betrayal. It was necessary for them to work through it, though frankly? I wish they could have finished the discussion. Because instead of them coming to some sort of peace with their trust in each other, the truth came out about Heath, Liz realized that she was wrong, she apologized, and they moved forward together, on mission.

I can’t help pointing out though…after the fight and Liz's epiphany about Heath, Max and Liz spent at least 15 hours in a car together. And I'm sorry, I refuse to believe that they didn't talk about anything important for 15 hours. Fic writers assemble? 😆

Many thanks to @ober-affen-geil for doing a quick review and checking me on opinions vs facts. Very important.

And for my next trick… road trips, life choices, and Robert Frost! Coming soon to a Tumblr near you…

[sleepynobie]

seelie | childe x reader

(A/N: It's been a while since the last time I write so it takes time to get the feel back but yeah, I'm obsessed with this game so enjoy!)

This isn't what Childe expects on his first hangout with you after being busy for a while.

A sigh escapes his lips as he starts to reminiscing the first time he hung out with you. It all began when Childe happened to meet you during his free time and he decided to invite you to have lunch together. Well, you were suspicious of him at first because you thought he had an ulterior motive. But then when he said he's going to pay for the meal, that thought quickly dissipates as you agree to have lunch with him. That doesn't mean you didn't have your guard up as you didn't fully trust him. But eventually after hundreds of free meals, you begin to loosen up to him.

To conclude, you start to see him as a friend that he doesn't even need to bribe you with a free meal (but he still pays for it anyway), and as much as he doesn't want to admit, he begins to fall for you. So, when he suddenly gets busy with his work and unable to hang out with you, he realises how much he misses hanging out with you. That's why he's so excited about today's hangout.

But then out of nowhere, this so-called 'seelie' appears and steals your attention away from him. For God sake, the entire conversation of this lunch has been about it to the point he starts to get sick of it. Besides, is that really a seelie? Why would this Ulman guy just leave it on your care when he only met you for the first time? Unless he actually knows you and has an ulterior motive?! And what baffles him is how you casually accept it just because it's cute?! Anyway, he'll need to keep an eye on the seelie and start researching about Ulman-

"Aww, isn't (seelie's name) just the cutest?" Childe snaps out of his thought when he notices that your seelie approaches him and tries to gain his attention.

He frowns for a moment and has his guard up because he's still suspicious of your seelie which makes it flinch and flies back to you. But at the same time, he also doesn't miss the opportunity to flirt with you as he smiles at you "Hmm... I think you're the cutest one instead of that, (Name)"

A slight blush starts to appear as you get flustered for a moment. But then you notice how he doesn't call your seelie with its name that you frown at him "It's (seelie's name), call it properly"

"Okay, okay" Childe replies nonchalantly before pouting while looking at your seelie "You know, I'm still not convinced if (seelie's name) is really a seelie and not dangerous at all"

You sigh "Come on Childe, aren't you being overly suspicious? I've been with (seelie's name) for a while and it has been a great companion and comfort whenever I'm down"

"It's not overly suspicious. I'm being cautious for your sake, (Name)" He says in defence before turning his attention to Paimon who has been focusing on eating her food throughout the conversation "and what about Paimon?"

Paimon stops and looks at you with an expectant look as you look at her before replying to him.

"She's an emergency food"

"What?! Paimon is not an emergency food!"

"Ouch. Rest in peace, Paimon" He says and looks at her with pity which makes her look annoyed.

"I'm kidding. Of course, she has been a great companion too" You say before grinning at Paimon which she huffs in response and complains at how you're being mean to her.

"Anyway, I don't trust (seelie's name) alright?" Childe says "It might have been an act to let your guard down so when you're completely defenceless, it definitely uses the opportunity to attack you-"

"Okay, that's just ridiculous" You object before looking at your seelie and patting it "I just can't imagine (seelie's name) is secretly an assassin"

He sighs exasperatedly and starts to feel irked about not only how you're defending your seelie so much, but also the fact that you don't care about how he's trying to look out for you "(Name), just because it's cute, doesn't mean it's completely harmless"

"Well, I have to disagree because (seelie's name) is the proof that it's cute and harmless"

"How do you know it's harmless?"

"Then, how do you know it's harmful?"

"I'm just saying it's highly possible that (seelie's name) is waiting for the right timing to hurt you. Have you learned anything from our first meeting, (Name)?"

"But (seelie's name) is different from you!" You exclaim as your anger has been building up and finally bursts out "You don't even take the time to get to know it and yet you're already assuming that it's dangerous. Did you even notice that it tried to be friend with you?"

Childe looks taken aback at your sudden outburst whereas Paimon and your seelie look terrified. Meanwhile, you try to calm yourself down as you take a deep breath before explaining calmly "To be honest, I was so excited to introduce (seelie's name) to you because I thought you two can be friends so it can remember you. I didn't tell you this but (seelie's name) can detect treasures and now enemies if they're nearby. So, I was thinking if it remembers you, maybe it can let me know if you're nearby"

You start to look slightly embarrassed at how you're basically confessing your feelings but you prefer to be honest about it so you continue "As much as I don't want to admit, I miss hanging out with you alright because you're the only that I can banter with. The more we get to know each other, the more I realise how we're like on the same frequency even though ironically we're enemies. But we've decided to not drag our background into this if we're friends right? So, I'm not going to associate with Fatui"

Childe who has been listening to you, starts to feel guilty and ashamed at how his jealousy takes over his consideration to befriend your seelie. But then, when you begin talking about your feelings about him, that catches him off guard because he never expects you to feel that way.

"Besides, people normally don't try to rebuild their trust to someone because they've been betrayed once and that was me before. But ever since I met your brother and how persistent you were in trying to spend time with me, I got to learn more about you and I just decided to give you a second chance" You say before smiling "Since we're friends now, shouldn't you try to trust me that (seelie's name) is not dangerous? Even if it ends up dangerous, it doesn't hurt you anyway because it's completely my fault for not listening to you-"

You suddenly stop explaining and look surprised when you look at him because Childe's face reddens out of the blue. He quickly looks away when he meets you in the eye which makes you look confused but also thinks that it's cute since you never see this side of him.

"Woah, Childe's face looks like the Jueyun chili" Paimon suddenly says as she has been watching you two because she's too afraid to say anything. That ruins the moment as you stifle a laugh before eventually laughing when you can't hold it anymore. Childe who was feeling guilty, then touched and overwhelmed due to your confession, and now embarrassed because Paimon just had to say that. But thanks to her, the serious atmosphere tones down and he feels a little calmer before looking at you.

"Well umm... I'll start with an apology because like you said, I was being inconsiderate to (seelie's name)" He says and looks at your seelie apologetically before returning his attention to you "Honestly, I was also the same as you because I looked forward to hanging out with you again because I realised how much I miss spending time with you during my free time. It's the only time when I feel like I'm being who I am and how it feels like to hang out with your friends"

Suddenly, he starts to feel embarrassed at what he's going to say as he can't help but look away from you while resting his cheek on his palm "But I just felt disappointed when you only talked about (seelie's name) and care so much about it. I guess I just felt unfair since it takes your attention away from me"

There's an awkward silence for a moment because you still try to understand what he just said while the silence makes Childe even feel more embarrassing.

"So... you're saying that you're jealous of (seelie's name)?" You finally reply and Childe is feeling called out because that's basically what it is.

".... Yeah.." He responds almost inaudible.

"Oh" You merely say for a moment before smirking "You want me to dote on you?"

"That line sounds familiar.." Paimon says to herself while a blush comes up to Childe's face because he gets caught off guard. Again.

"So that's why he likes to flirt huh" You thought to yourself as you find it fun to do before Childe calms himself down by clearing his throat and changes the topic.

"Anyway, it's settled now. Although, I don't think (seelie's name) wants to approach me again"

"I think it will open up to you if you approach it first" You smile and he blushes slightly before trusting your words as he raises his hand forward to try to pat it. Your seelie looks unsure for a moment but you reassure it that Childe doesn't mean anything bad and it trusts you. It lets Childe touch its head and he looks surprised at how soft and squishy it is, similarly to a slime.

"See? How can you say that it's dangerous" You sigh "You're overreacting, like a child"

"Can you stop using my name as a pun?" He starts to look irked which startles your seelie and he quickly apologises to it.

"Aww you two are finally friends" You smile proudly and give a pat to your seelie and to Childe which irks him even more.

"Now, you're treating me like a kid"

"But you want attention right? I give you attention" You smirk mischievously.

He frowns at you and grabs your hand to get it off from his head before he leans closer to you with a smirk "Maybe you can give me something else instead"

You start blushing but you know that he's being a flirt again so this time, you're not gonna back down. Your seelie starts to panic as it thinks that you're gonna fight again but thanks to Paimon, the tension breaks again.

"Are you guys going to kiss or something?"

The two of you blush furiously and immediately say no to her.

"How do you even know about kissing?" You sweatdrop.

"Anyway, I hope we can be friends, (seelie's name)" Childe smiles at your seelie and it looks excited as it suddenly extends its ears before twirling around. You smile happily as you watch the two of them bonding together and thankfully the hangout ends well.

Bonus

"You don't really need to pay for the meal, you know?" Childe sighs since he wants to pay for the meal but you quickly take over to pay.

"It's okay, I mean I almost ruined our hangout so" You grin.

"I thought we're going to get a free meal" Paimon sighs in disappointment "Free meals taste better"

"Paimon..." Your expression immediately changes to the one where you're going to scold her.

Childe chuckles before smiling "I'll treat you guys next time alright?"

"Yes please!" Paimon replies excitedly while you just sweatdrop at her before sighing.

"Anyway, I'm gonna head back to the bank so I'll see you guys again when I see you" He says and pats your seelie which makes you look happy at how they get along.

"Okay" You nod "But before you go, let me tell you something"

"What is it?" He looks confused.

"I said that (seelie's name) is the cutest but just today, I found that you're cuter than (seelie's name)" You smile innocently while Childe looks flustered at the sudden flirt and he's not used to it.

"I still think you're the cutest" He merely replies before turning around to leave "Anyway, I'm going so see ya"

"Alright see ya" You wave your hand before laughing in enjoyment at how you like making Childe get flustered. Now he can relate to how you feel when he flirts with you.

[the-scooby-gang]

Finally watched the Scoob!movie

Here we are in the future! As you guys know I was REALLY EXCITED to see the new movie. Well, here we are, so I will share my thoughts.

This one is a long one, so buck up!

Let’s break the movie down and see its high and low points, shall we? 

One thing that I noticed right out of bat is that the movie is following the typical Hanna-Barbera crossover logic: “Hey audience, you already know these characters and their dynamics, so we will not really focus on them (unless is a plot point on the narrative) and focus more on the adventure”

Which worked for me. But I also know that I’m a 20 years old woman that was a child when Wacky Races, Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines, Scooby-Doo and Captain Caveman was on every day at morning before I went to school.

What I mean is, I already know these characters, so watching the movie was just like watching the crossover episodes. It was fun, not because of the plot, but because the characters that I grew loving were sharing a screen.

But now I think of a new audience that may have NO IDEA who these other characters are and are kinda mislead by the title of the movie because, and lets be honest here, the movie should have being called something like:

Scooby gang and the Falcon Team!

or more precisely

Scooby, Shaggy and the Falcon Team!

That’s the first low point: The opening minutes leads you to believe that, even if Shaggy and Scooby have most of the screen time, after all the plot of the movie is clearly about their bond as best friends, you expect that the whole Scooby Gang are going to have equal screen time. But that is not the case.

They have nice moments of course! One of the first high points is that the gang is really wholesome when they are together! They are good friends that care about each other! What breaks them apart is not some forced antagonism between them, but an outside force (MOTHERFUCKING SIMON COWELL) and, by the way things went, if the plot had not kicked in on the bowling alley, the gang would unite again, hug, call Simon Cowell an idiot, reassure Shaggy and Scooby that they are valid and find a new person to sponsor the expansion of Mystery INC. 

In fact, now that I think about it, the plot could have gone WAAAAAAY different, but that is a talk for another post.

High point one and a half: The movie was funny and cute. Self aware jokes, Muttley and Dick antics, Dick’s disguises, the F-Bomb, Shaggy is a Potterhead, Scooby was animated with “This dog deserves hugs” mentality and I approve.

High point number two: Dick Dastardly. His entire personality, his disguises , his motivation. God his motivation. I too would open the gates of hell to get my dog back (and also some treasure, this is Dastardly we are talking about)

In fact his interactions with Muttley are high point number three. THEY ARE SUCK ASSHOLES BUT THEY CLEARLY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH I LOVE THAT!

But that also opens the gates for Low point number two: Where Dick arc is finished in a satisfactory way (being an asshole that cares for one (1) asshole dog) , Brian’s a.k.a Blue Falcon doesn’t.

You see, in the movie Shaggy clearly sees that Brian acts the way he does because he is NOT Blue Falcon. He is his son. He has the weight of a legacy on his shoulders and he is not coping well with that. This is highlighted by how Dynomutt sees him and his childish ways. (in fact, Dynomutt just being done with Brian shit 95% of the movie is high point number four) And you think “They are going to make a scene were he and Dynomutt are more open with each other. Where Brian says how scared he is and how the pressure of the legacy is maybe too much for him and that he is no hero, and them Dynomutt is going to reassure him that, No. You are a hero. I’m sorry for expecting you to be like your father, instead of doing to you what did for him: guiding you” and we got that! .....Really rushed in the middle of the final action scene with no emotional punch at all as a side effect from the “we expect you to know who these people are” crossover logic. Because I never watched Dynomutt and the Blue Falcon

I don’t how their dynamic was supposed to go. Even more by being the original Dynomutt with a new Falcon. I have no bases of how things used to be to feel anything. Especially because I don't know how the OG blue falcon acted in comparison to his son to see were he was falling short. I don't know how Dynomutt acted with the OG Falcon to see were he was setting the bar for Brian. Without that information, even if Dynomutt being done is entertaining  and fun, it leaves the emotional impacts hollow.

Low point number three is also to blame here: the movie fells INCREDIBLY RUSHED. And I think I know the reason. Hanna-Barbera is no stranger to crossovers, but they never did more them one property + another before, three properties at most. It was always Scooby Doo and The Wacky Race or Scooby Doo and Captain Caveman or Scooby Doo and The Blue Falcon but never Scooby Doo and All of them together. 

Even in the episode of Mystery incorporated “Mystery Solvers Club State Finals” were ALL THE HANNA-BARBERA MYSTERY SOLVER TEAMS WERE TOGETHER UNDER ONE ROOF , they made the mystery about the disappearing of all the mystery solvers except the mascots, which left the cast of characters of the episode more manageable them having all the gangs fighting for screen time, and even them some of the mascots have more dialog and character beats them others.

With so many characters, they had to pic which ones got a full arc or important plot beats, which left all the other character lacking as a side effect.

That brings us to low point number four: THE MYSTERY IS WEAK. It’s weak even for Scooby Doo levels and that is saying something. I saw episodes of Be Cool (that is a really good incarnation character design aside, you should check it out) that had a more well rounded mystery them this. The focus of the movie was divided in so many places that the mystery had no room to breath (Dick, Shaggy and Scooby, Shaggy and Scooby and the Falcon team, Dee Dee and Dynomutt backs aching by having to carry the plot forward, Shaggy and Brian have a heart to heart moments, Captain Caveman fight scene, and finally the mystery gang and the, you know, mystery)

The mystery is about “why the fuck Dick wants Scoob so bad” and the answer is “Because Scooby is descended from Peritas, Alexanders the Great Dog, and he needs him to open the gate to the underworld that Alex and Perry created to protect their treasure, plus save Mutley that is stuck there”

That could have being such a strong mystery!!! They would think that he only has greed in mind by opening the gates, not giving a flying fuck about the giant Cerberus that is going to eat Athens while he fills his pockets, only to discover that, yes there was greed in his actions but there was also a man looking for his best friend stuck on the other side, with would have made such a strong emotional parallel to Shaggy and Scooby final challenge. Missed opportunity. 

Back to the high points to balance thing out, the high point number five: Fred is a himbo that loves his friends and his van. The moment were they hear that Shaggy and Scooby are in danger and he immediately turns the van around nearly launching Velma and Daphne though the window was really good, plus the “Leave Shaggy Alone” and the fact that when the Fake!Fred appears (Dastardly in one of his ultra-realistic disguises) in the island and Shaggy calls his name and they hug in the most wholesome way, the fact that Shaggy doest think that the wholesomeness is out of character implies that the Real Freddie is just as sweet.

High point number six: Daphne gains first an Allie and then an entire robot army for her friends though the power of compassion. This is a nice take on Daphne. They say that Fred is the Brawn, Velma is the Brain and Daphne is the People person, which I take is the fact that she can make fast friends and easy contacts to solve the mysteries + think about why someone would do something, like, Velma sees the logic behind the mystery while Daphne sees the emotion that lead to the mystery in the first place.

Which, unfortunately leads to low point number five: even if I can make all that character analyses from one phrase and this specific moment and its outcome, thanks to Low point number three and four a.e. Lack of character focus and lack of mystery I can't truly see if I’m right or not about Velma's logic and Daphne’s emotional knowledge... BECAUSE I CAN BARELY REMEMBER VELMA AT ALL. Velma is the one that suffered the most by the lack of mystery because there is where she thrives. The moments were Velma piece the clues together is so overshadowed by everything that is going down that you barely notices it. Same thing for Dee Dee. She and Dynomutt are, thanks to the way the plot was build, the only ones that are actually making moves to compel the plot forward, but outside of being the one flying the ship and trying to find were the skulls macguffings are, I can barely remember her besides  a moment were she and Dyno are baffled about Brian thinking that Anonymous was an actual name.

Dee Dee is from Captain Caveman, she was the brains of the group, which we kinda see, but she is apparently in a point in time where she and Cavey don't even know each other. I think if they had removed the Caveman fight scene and instead added dialog of her talking about how she and her friends discovered a caveman on ice and they are planing on defrosting him, you know, THE PLOT OF THE ORIGINAL CAPTAIN CAVEMAN AND THE TEEN ANGELS would have being better.  Or maybe just say that she is just here because she promised the OG Blue Falcon that she would help train his son to replace him and when her work is done she is going back to her team. You know, actually stabilising a more connected world without inflating your cast and making things difficult for yourself and the script writers.

Low point number five and a half : Captain Caveman is completely superfluous. He was a funny beat, but outside of that, the time that they expended getting to his island, finding him, fighting him and losing the skull macguffing anyway  could have being expended on character moments either between the falcon team, or better yet, the Mystery gang. Or put more time on the mystery itself.

Now to high point number seven and the most important of them all, after all it is the plot were the entire movie is set upon: When Shaggy is speaking with Brian about how the pressure of his father shadow over him is beyond overwhelming, Shaggy is so insightful in that scene that it heavily implies that he feels in part in a similar way in the gang and that is one of the reasons he felt offended when Simon Cowell, and later on Dick Dastardly, say that he is virtually insignificant  to the group and them gets jealous of Scoob when he starts to spend more time with the Falcon Team. 

Is one thing to be the scary cat with your best friend, is another thing entirely to be the scary cat alone. AND I LOVE THAT

Shaggy and Scooby bond has being highlighted from the opening scene (high point number eight) and Shaggy’s felling of loneliness. That before Scooby came into his life, he had no one. And even after the gang was united, Scooby remains his first and best friend. The slight idea of losing his friend to something that he can never compare (What is a Shaggy in face of a Blue Falcon Team membership) makes him lash out. We joke about Scooby being Shaggy service dog, but for all effects, Scooby is his emotional support, his light on the end of the tunnel that was his loneliness. The gang are his friends, but they are really different from him. Meanwhile he and Scoob are almost always in the same wave lane. And them suddenly Scoob appears to be changing. Moving away. 

The entire movie is Shaggy dealing with the idea of losing Scooby. Of losing his first friend and scared cat companion. What he ultimately learns is that the power of his friendship with Scoob is way too strong to let simple thing as “going away” or “changing” diminished what they created through the years. That’s why he says he has changed in the final. That he has grow. Because he has come to realise that even if Scoob changes and becomes more brave or something, he has nothing to fear. Because being friends is to know that, even miles apart, dimensions apart, your friendship lives on.

By acknowledging that Scoob can change, or even leave but never truly abandon him, Shaggy himself grows.

That’s why he chooses to be the one stuck on the other side.

Because he knows that he is not alone, not really.

So the final count is:  HIGH points = 7,5 LOW points = 5,5

I liked the film. I was giggling like an idiot the entire time. My inner child was happy, even if my adult brain was not as pleased in many moments after further thought. However both my child heart and my adult brain agree that the movie is far from perfect. Many interesting ideas but poor execution of many of them.  With is fine. We all know that the Scooby movies have already peaked *cough* Legend of the Phantosaur *cough*

This was a long ass review of the Scoob! Movie.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Thrax

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

So I made a poll, a poll to determine who you all wanted to see get the Psycho Analysis treatment for Black History Month. I picked a few myself, but I also put in choices so my fans could pick four villains portrayed by black actors that I would review. I had some truly legendary performances on there, there was Blacula, Dr. Facilier, Audrey II! And yet, somehow, despite all of these fantastic characters… y’all wanted to hear about the dude from Osmosis Jones.

Don’t mistake this for bashing Thrax, the absolute best part of the half incredible work of animation, half miserably dated grossout comedy that is Osmosis Jones; I’m just more baffled people wanted to hear what I thought of this guy, of all characters.

Motivation/Goals: Thrax has one desire, and one desire only: recognition. Specifically, he wishes to be put down in the medical books as an unstoppable, deadly disease, and he goes about this by killing each of his victims faster than the last. He proudly states how he has previously killed a child, as well as killing an old man in 72 hours, so he has quite the impressive resume behind him to the point how it’s amazing he hasn’t been put in the books yet. Still, it’s hard to deny he wouldn’t deserve some fame for ridding the world of a toxic slob like Frank.

Performance: Thrax has pretty much got it all set in terms of personality, animation, and voice acting; he’s scoring tens across the board in all three departments. He’s just so charming, affable, and in the eyes of some very strange individuals, sexy. I mean, I guess it doesn’t hurt that his voice is supplied by Laurence Fishburne, a man who is most definitely a sex god If I’ve ever seen one. Ladies love Cowboy Curtis, or so I’ve been told. Still, for all his outward charm, there’s still nothing that hides the fact he is a brazen, remorseless serial killer who relishes in the suffering he causes his victims before they expire. He’s literally a sick bastard.

Final Fate: Thrax falls into a beaker of alcohol while fighting Osmosis Jones. Befitting a character who is relentlessly dark and jarring in an otherwise goofy buddy cop grossout comedy hybrid, we get to witness him dying in excruciating, agonizing detail that is sure to scar a few children whose parents thought it was a good idea to let them watch this film.

Best Scene: Literally every scene with him is one of the best in the movie. But if you want to know how to perfectly and easily establish a villain, look no further than his introduction scene, where he cooly murders two sanitation workers and then destroys their ship like it’s just another Tuesday for him… and let’s be honest, it probably is.

Best Quote: Again, look no further than his introduction scene. “Careful, I’m contagious,” delivered perfectly by Laurence Fishburne as Thrax murders an innocent white blood cell, is pretty much the entire character wrapped up into a single line dripping with faux affability. I honestly envy that line, it’s just so damn good.

Final Thoughts & Score: Thrax is a villain who is legitimately way too good for the film he’s in. He’s just so wonderfully jarring in tone and personality; while you obviously need a villain in a buddy cop movie, this is a buddy cop movie that is not only animated, by juxtaposed with early 2000s live-action grossout comedy being performed by Bill Murray. Hell, Thrax enters Frank’s body after Frank consumes an egg that fell on the ground at the zoo after being in a monkey’s mouth, and then we are expected to care about what happens to Frank when Thrax starts causing problems.

Honestly, much like the case with Hexxus, this movie makes it way too easy to want to root for the villain here. Let’s look at the facts – Thrax is played by Laurence Fishburne, who we have already established is a sexy hunk of man. He is clearly a walking reference to “The Mask of the Red Death,” and who isn’t a sucker for homages to Edgar Allen Poe? He is dark, terrifying, and far more impressive than the movie around him. He brings comedy to a halt and makes every scene with him in it feel terrifying. And, most importantly, the people he’s going up against are a lot less engaging and impressive than he is. Jones and Drix are fun, sure, but are they as cool as Thrax? And Frank is so utterly worthless Thrax killing him would likely be a mercy, or it would be if he didn’t openly state he was going to kill Frank’s daughter next.

Thrax gets a nice 8/10, sitting alongside fellow “Sexy-voiced and strangely dark villains in cult classic animated films” Joe the fish and Hexxus. He really is a villain way too cool for at least half of the movie he’s in. He really feels like a leftover from when the movie was supposed to be PG-13, and they just totally forgot to tone him down at all when they retooled it into what is ostensibly supposed to be a family comedy. And you know what? That just makes me love him all the more.

[whirlybirdwhat]

Oh I wonder how Katsuki would react to them! If it was an op au he would probably have Zoro's role (wants to be the best and doesn't care about what people think) but I don't know if he would like Zoro if he met him (and I really don't know what he would think of Luffy)

OKAY SO REALLY TINY ANSWER TO YOUR ACTUAL ASK AND THEN UNDER MY CUT MY FEELINGS ABOUT THAT KASUKI AND ZORO OPINION BECAUSE BOY. DID I FIND OUT I HAD EMOTIONS!

So! Kastuki be enraged. here are people who give no fucks about heroes, if bakugo’s better than him, have a drive he can’t match and the ability to cause bigger explosions than he could ever hope (Three Thousand worlds, red hawk, fire bird star... i can go on.) They aren’t bound by science like he is. And they don’t care about heroes, or the government, things that validate Bakugo.

So he’d be enraged. and then maybe ave a lil bit of respect? Because they are, sorry, stronger than bakugo in an objective sense and would wipe the floor with him. Especially since Bakugo wouldn’t have haki. And More, they wouldn’t care about what bakugo thought of them and would just do their thing. I think bakugo would want to be them. And He’d be 100% baffled by luffy who would just think his explosions were cool then show him his red hawk attack lmao.

NOW. Onto my very strong opinions underneath the cut. 

gonna be honest i havent watch bnha since i watched one piece, so its been awhile, but i also feel that Bakugo and Zoro are just. very different characters. especially due to the extremely different themes both medias have. Zoro has a goal, an unbeatable, impossible goal that he will sacrifice anything but his friends to get - and in the beginning, when we first meet luffy, he would have sacrificed him if he got in his way. Zoro, however, supports others - he believes, no, knows that luffy will be the next pirate king. He’s the first mate and steps up when the captain can’t (water 7) and knows what need to be done and what he won’t sacrifice (which quite frankly is only his crew mr “chopping my legs off to win a battle is a good idea” fucking dumbass ily). 

Bakugo, to my understanding as i stopped watching when Bakugo got captured, is literally. Not that. He has a goal yes, but its a goal shared by several other characters - deku, and i believe todoroki wants to be the number one, etc - and we also don’t know why beyond he wants to be the best. Its a baseless goal, as of right now, one that can only be given meaning through fan speculation. Which is in comparison to Zoro, whose goal to be the best is through a promise to a dead sister-figure and for his need not to be weak and to be strong enough for his captain - his crew - not himself, like Bakugo presumably. Additionally, Bakugo has literally stepped on others in a malicious way to get to the top, and while Zoro has done so, it is simply because he doesn’t care; he’s better than them in skill, and in the one piece world its a dog eat dog world. Zoro is staying true to the values he as a swordsman has. Bakugo wants to be a hero. Bakugo has less compassion for citizens than Zoro has, a world class criminal. Who has destroyed several towns and taken down several kings, tyrants, and government officials. 

Too my last point, Bakugo... isn’t really a leader. Zoro isn’t either but Zoro steps up and people listen. Bakugo steps up and yells, and people listen. Its different. 

And Bakugo does cares about what people think - he wouldn’t yell, proclaim he’s the best, be as competitive as he is, bully children, or anything if didn’t. He wouldn’t want to be the best with seemingly no motivation if he didn’t care what people thought.

Zoro has quite literally said that it doesn’t matter if he’s a pirate or a marine, or what people think of him - as long as his name rings across the land as the best swordsman, fufilling his promise to Kuina, he has achieved his dream.  (Chapter 5 -6 I believe.) 

This difference is of course to the themes of both manga. To my Understanding, BNHA is all about being a hero - what does it take to become a hero, what makes a hero, do not give up without trying, help others before yourself, theres a solution to every problem, etc. I looked most of these up because the only one I could think up off the top of my head is what makes a hero/ is it ability or your actions because how bnha handled it esp with its opening line pissed me off but!! thats a story for another time! 

One Piece’s themes disregard heroes. One piece’s themes are first and foremost - dreams, the romantic view of the world,  sticking to your ideals, being selfish, and freedom. I could go on for hours about it. In fact, I have. 

The One Piece world is a lawless place. the government is corrupt, slavery exists, and its heroes are either pirates who saved you only because you were their friend (strawhats, despite not wanting to be called heroes) or marine heroes who are chained to the concept of a ruthless justice and have to let family members die for it (garp). Everything is weird, but only one character in the entire history of one piece has been alienated for being weird - Katakuri, for his mouth, which is fucking absurd considering his brother literally has an oven on his head and his mother is a soul sucking cannibal who wears a polka dot dress.  In one piece your ‘quirks’ aren’t celebrated - its just normal. Fun even. Especially on. the Grand Line where the rule is anything can happen, from rubber boys fighting God or islands made out of food.

The world of BNHA is the exact opposite. While they have “quirks” which can be anything, its not something anybody can obtain, unlike one piece, where only Conquerors Haki is an unobtainable skill unless you are born with it. BNHA is a world buried deep in laws, heroes, and villains - black and white for the most part to my understanding. It is a world where if you are villain, you are pretty much expected to be evil or out for blood, and if you are a hero, you are generally expected to help people, even if you might be doing it for money or fame. Unlike one piece where each and every character has a dfiferent moral compass. BNHA is also a realistic world in terms of quirks - you won’t be finding islands of candy or the like, and it is pretty much contained in one setting, which shifts characters characterizations a lot. 

How does this affect Bakugo and Zoro?

Well. In a world where dreams and selfishness are valued, you would think Bakugo would flourish. I think he would falter, because of what you pointed out - his willingness to be the best. In BNHA, theres a structure for how you become the best, through school and a career, an official ranking. There’s nothing like that in One Piece, as bounties have been shown to be absolutely fucking worthless, and literally all the top bounties are just puns. fucking puns. I love it. 

If Bakugo went around as he does in BNHA, in one piece, a world where he doesn’t have people protecting him from his actions or not hurting him because he’s a kid, bakugo would honestly probably die. Bakugo’s drive to be the  best and his normality as typically being the best in BNHA would not translate over well.

In One Piece rookies get knocked the fuck out unless you have plot armor which honestly doesn’t always protect you. See the Baratie. Saboady. Fucking Marine Ford. Wano. Big Mom. Fucking FOXY. You can surrvive by staying lucky - Buggy, but it isn’t often.

What would Bakugo even be the best of? The Marines where he has to listen to the Five Elders? He’d be a less hateful Akainu (because no one can be as bad as Akainu) 

In a world without structure, Bakugo would fucking die. 

In comparison, in a BNHA au, Zoro has drive and would probably just be like an accidental villain like I have in my au. 

In the End, Zoro is a pirate, and Bakugo is a hero in training. Bakugo relies on organizations to help him reach the top while Zoro actively destroys them. Bakugo wants to lead but can’t (as of right now) and Zoro can lead but loves his captain, so won’t. Zoro’s goals are seated in concrete ideals, concrete promises that he has to keep. Idek why Bakugo wants to be a hero beyond being the best. 

BNHA could not work in a one piece right down to the fucking morals. Pirates Vs Heroes. The pirates could maybe be the heroes, but could the heroes ever set out to purposefully take down others, obtain land, and be free from responsibility?

Thats just a portion of my thoughts on it. BNHA characters are just... so incompatible with any world that isn’t theirs because their lives revolve around fitting the algorithm of UA and the Hero Career. OP, in its focus on selfishness and disregarding the rules of any place and bringing chaos anywhere, can pretty much go anywhere without being odd because even in their own world they ruin every thing.

Okay. Im done now. Sorry anon you opened a can of worms i didn’t think i  had thoughts on!! guess i do!!

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

Spider-Man 2099 v4 #1 and 2099 Omega Thoughts

This is literally the third time I’ve purchased a comic book called Spider-Man 2099 #1 in 5 years. Technically more if we include reprints. Isn’t that kind of ridiculous?

Fun fact, I wasn’t buying any comics (sans some pre-OMD Spidey and Deadpool Classic trades) between 2009 and 2014. It was the 2014 Spidey 2099 run that got me back into the game, for good or ill.

This issue wasn’t nearly as good at series. And Omega was…lol…it was so bad and essentially an extension of Spidey 2099 I’m covering them together.

I remember fondly my hype when I saw Miguel in ASM v5 #25 and my hype for this one shot, back when I didn’t realize it was just part of a larger event.

Oh boy did this let me down.

Let me start with some superficial praise.

The art for Spidey 2099 and Sandoval on Omega were decent. And there was some interesting ideas pertaining to the world of the future, such as the removal of money and instead having everyone’s value depend upon what they can contribute. A society built upon meritocrisy, albeit with harsh reprisals if you can contribute little. Also the idea of corporations fixing things so only insiders can gain employment speaks to the corporatocracy  of the 2099 universe (one severely undermined when we consider Doom is ultimately in charge anyway…). People intentionally using drugs to keep up their work productivity is another great idea, and a genuinely interesting twist upon the original depiction of the rapture drug from Spidey 2099 v1 #1.  Finally people essentially enabling identity theft in exchange for drugs was an interesting sci-fi concept.

But beyond that…this was bad.

When I began covering this event proper with 2099 Alpha my dominant critique was ‘who is this for’.

A reboot of the 2099 line over 20 years since the original line ended and less than 3 years since the revival of it ended? A reboot intended to modernize the 1990s’ take on the future, a take that frankly proved 99% accurate anyway. And finally a reboot that alternated between doing spotty world building, killing off new characters, tie-ins to modern canon events and most of the time communicated its ideas in confusing and baffling ways.

I put forward that it was doomed to displease the old 2099 fans like me because it was erasing what we knew and loved. But it was also so poorly communicating its rebooted vision that new people were going to be alienated.

I’m only slightly going to backtrack on what I said. Because the Punisher 2099 issue was if you like the greatest argument in favour of the reboot. It wasn’t just the best issue in this mess, it was a bona fide awesome story just in general. It actually dived into an aspect of futuristic sci-fi that the 1990s 2099 series (to my knowledge) would’ve struggled to cover as it pertained so much to 2010s life and technology.

More poignantly though, the problem with this event is that there was no over arching vision between the titles. Not every one shot had the same problems but they all in different ways displayed problems that smacked into the very premise of this event.

F4 2099 was literally pointless as it spent a whole issue introducing a new F4 then killed them.

Conan 2099 could’ve been virtually the same if Conan was like 20 years in the future not this new future we rebooted.

Arguably Punisher 2099 relied upon familiarity with the Jake Galloway Punisher 2099 before it subverted your expectations.

Ghost Rider 2099 was fun but the writer clearly LIKED the original take on the character to the point where he essentially minimized changes to the rebooted version making the act of rebooting the character pointless in the first place and failing the mission statement of the event.

Venom 2099 was a weird tie-in for Cates current Venom mega arc involving Knull that was nonsensical as it proposes that Knull is still en route to Earth and thus in theory there is no tension in Cates’ run. Moreover it wasn’t much of a futuristic take on Venom himself and fundamentally hurt as there was no Spider-Man for Venom to act as a dark reflection of.

Doom 2099 in fairness had a cool twist, but a cool twist that didn’t make sense in and of itself and was also reliant upon familiarity with the original 1990s character.

And then we come to these issues.

These issues I’m sad to say just absolutely fundamentally fail conceptually.

He’s incredibly passive and very bland as a character so newer fans coming in with no knowledge or attachment to the Miguel O’Hara of old are unlikely to warm to him. His defining trait is being someone who cares enough about the suffering of others that he will not actively take part in it, but will also not actively do anything to help like his brother Gabe. This is then set up for his brother to die, cue a less good retread of Peter Parker’s origin story but minus much action of Miggy in costume. On paper the idea of a guy experiencing Peter’s ultimate failure and from this being motivated to OBTAIN super powers is interesting but it’s just not examined all that much in the story. What I’m saying is at a time when there is a sea of Spider-Heroes to read about on the stands this version of Miguel O’Hara is lame, derivative and the execution of his character half-hearted.

Then on the other hand you have the older fans’ perspectives. Obviously old Spidey 2099 fans are unlikely to take to this new version just on principle. But when you realize you lost the old character for THIS guy…oh boy does that sting.

Original recipe Miguel O’Hara was cool because he zigged where Peter zagged. He was kind of an asshole, but one with limits on how little he cared. And he became more heroic over time, but never the same type of hero as Peter. And above all he was a sarcastic, sardonic, cynic who you could tell was thinking ‘I can’t even with this Spider-Shit right now’. Case in point, he was okay with straight up killing opponents. He was more unique and much more compelling than this version, as were his cast. Lyla is basically the Aunt May of this story and not the source of humour that she was even in the first 3 issues of the 1990s run. She also lacks her iconic Monroe look, and isn’t even consistent with how she looked in ASM v5 #35.

Losing a cool character for a lame one would be bad enough but then the story straight up invalidates both itself and the entire goddam event.

It does this by having the rebooted Miggy start to see visions of the pre-rebooted (prebooted?) 2099 timeline, meet an aged version of his prebooted self and then have even more flashes of the prebooted timeline. *

Wow…Just….Wow…

Let’s pretend that the vision of 2099 in this event was a temporary thing, an Age of Apocalypse or a House of M just for 2099 and the plan was always to go back to how it was before when the story wrapped up.

That makes this entire event pointless. See the reason AoA worked (and HoM in theory could have worked) is because it was a temporary change of pace.

That doesn’t apply to the 2099 line, a nostalgic, discontinued line of comics and characters that are unlikely to get a full on revival and who’s last attempt at a revival wrapped up over 2 years ago.

THIS event should’ve been a nostalgia trip for the old fans and a chance to introduce that line to a new generation. Instead it discarded the old in favour of something new which was seemingly intended to go nowhere.

Good job Marvel, any new fans you MIGHT have gotten hooked just got fucked over and people like me who pre-ordered this event thinking we were going to get the characters we knew and loved also got fucked over.

And in fact the entire exercise was an example of intentional redundancy.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Oh and it doesn’t make a lick of sense.

So Miguel was thrown back in time when his timeline was starting to be erased and replaced with the rebooted timeline, then he was erased in ASM v5 #34, which began this new rebooted timeline…but he is alive in it, remembers it, can give his past self visions from the old timeline...

…I’m a Doctor Who fan and that’s not any kind of wibbly wobbley timey whimey nonsense. It’s just regular ass nonsense, just like the Man-Spider monster Miguel encounters who repeats ouroboros to him, the same word ReedDoom said in the Doom 2099 issue. How and why would the Man-Spider creature say that to Miguel. How would prebooted Miguel know it said that? How and why would rebooted Miguel see Spidey 2099 in costume spray painting that?

Shit what the fuck does ouroboros even mean?????????

*one google search later*

A snake eating its tail as a symbol of endless infinity…what the fuck does that mean?

That Miguel makes himself Spider-Man 2099 always?

There was a cool idea in the Omega issue wherein we learn Doom essentially erased everyone’s memories with magic so they’d forget the Age of Heroes altogether, but the rise of the characters in the one shots represented that spell breaking down. Too bad it doesn’t add up given how Venom was always going to exist and existed SINCE the Age of Heroes and people obviously remember Thor as there is an entire tribe dedicated to him!**

However the Omega issue’s biggest sin is showing us how truly pointless most of the issues of this event were. Honest to God you only need to read Doom scenes from Alpha and then Spidey 2099 and Omega. Those are the only plot relevant issues out of this whole event.

Over all, these issues and this event have been a humungous, insulting disappointment. Check out some of the art but literally nothing else sans the Punisher.

*I mean if you want to get technical the 2099 universe has technically been rebooted multiple times. The version of it presented from 2013-2017 actually differed from the original 1990s version in various ways, e.g. Miguel’s love life panned out very differently. When I refer to the pre-rebooted/prebooted timeline I’m referring to the version from 2013-2017, just to be clear.

**There are other contradictions in these 2 issues as well, like how poverty and bad health have been erased but…we see they haven’t as there are multiple examples of both in the one shots.

[centrally-unplanned]

The Phantom of the Opera Movie: How (not) to Adapt Your Fanfic to Stage & Screen

I recently watched the infamously-maligned trainwreck that is the 2004 Phantom of the Opera film adaptation of the stage musical, which lived up to its reputation! Rehashing the atrocious casting of literally-sang-for-the-first-time-two-weeks-before-filming-Music-of-the-Night Gerard Butler as the Phantom is well-trod territory, but I don't think that is the real crux of the film's failings. Instead, I think it serves as a quintessential example of the failure to transition from stage to screen - and how lucky the stage adaptation was.

For the "PotO" uninitiated, despite the endless shipping the titular Phantom and the female deuteragonist Christine do not have a romantic relationship. Oh the Phantom is trying to get down with that, for sure, but she sees him as either a ghost, an angel, or a terrorist at various points, never a credible love interest. In the original novel this is extremely explicit, and it is actually preserved in the stage adaptation - though as you realize with this film not intentionally.

In a stage musical, audiences don't really "suspend disbelief" the way they do for something like movies. There is one or more human beings, right in front of them, being real people in a wooden box with minimalist decour - the artifice is inescapable. Which is fine, actually! Instead of being immersed in the worldbuilding the audience can appreciate the craft of it all, the acting chops of the leads and the high notes they hit and the cool set designs around them. As such strong plots for musicals aren't really required; details are skipped over in exchange for focusing on other aesthetic elements. More importantly for our purposes, in a musical like Phantom of the Opera the audience isn't set up to expect a tight directorial vision, with instead the characters being the a product of the choices of the actors themselves - people even look out for the different interpretations different leads will bring to the same script. Each performance is itself an adaptation.

This lack of verisimilitude does wonders for the musical version of Phantom of the Opera. Honestly, plot-wise and arc-wise? Phantom of the Opera isn’t that great. Christine, one of the supposed leads, has no motivation for like 90% of run-time, instead being buffeted about by the whims of other, more powerful characters (just like early 20th century France ooooh, eat it Leroux), and Raoul, her earnest, wealthy suitor-cum-fiance, is the dried cement of love interests with no arc to speak of. Lots of plot elements are covered quickly and left vague as to their meaning. But really, who cares? You get to watch a tortured, corrupted genius offer a panoply of shadowed delights to a beautiful ingenue in a rock-opera baritone, and Rage Against The System so hard when spurned they drop a God-damn chandelier on the stage - that’s really all you need!

In the stage musical there is often - lets be honest very often - sexual subtext between the Phantom and Christine. But that is the choice of the actors, it's not in the script, it stays subtext. You are there to watch those actors put their spin on it and take it to the limit - let them have fun with the material! On stage it serves a great metaphorical function; to be tempted by music, by the mystery of darkness, has been metaphorical sex for so long it needs no more explication. 

Now, however, we loop back to the movie adaption, with two key points to establish. First, movies do not work like musicals. There is no live person in front of you, every shot is the product of a dozen takes and as many hours of editing choices, and as a viewer you are dragged along lockstep seeing the results of these choices. All of this is in the service of building a cohesive vision that allows the audience to fully suspend disbelief. The price for this immersion is that now every moment of the film is imbued with intent. Everything has to be there for a reason, the way things in reality are - or more accurately the way we want reality to be. To quote Best Girl Mizusaki:

(Just when you thought I was going to write a media essay without being a huge weeb for once, huh?)

What's true for animation is almost as true for film, all of which means that how characters act is no longer an actor on stage doing their spin but the cohesive narrative of a story.

Second, the movie takes all of that fanshipping sexual subtext and cranks it all the way up the nosebleed seats, while changing none of the relevant plot points. In fact, it adds plot details to strip away the musical’s ambiguity! One of Christine's opening scenes, only briefly touched on in the stage musical, explains cleanly that she considers the Phantom the angel of her dead father come down to protect and guide her. Later in the show, as the Phantom's villainy becomes more apparent, when propositioned by Raoul her only objection is to how the Phantom might hurt her if he found out. Well after all of his temptations, rage, and villainy, near the climax of the film, she still sings in a graveyard about her uncertainty over whether or not he is a literal ghost or spirit of her father. So the plot structure is preserved and explicit - Christine is drawn to him due to his musical talent and offerings of instruction, is unsure if he is even human, but realizes his corporeality, villainy, and fundamental pitiable humanity at the end. Raoul throughout is her explicit, engaged-to-be-married romantic partner.

So then why are her and the Phantom fucking??

Seriously, I cannot undersell how sexual their scenes are.They are all over each other, fingers gliding over skin, and the next scene after this one is her in his bed with sex-hair all over the place! This subtext is continued in every scene they have together, long after he has been revealed as a murderer. At one point he confronts her in public, with her fiance watching, and it's still played like he is the Tuxedo Mask to her Sailor Moon. Even the scene where she takes off his mask is shot like it was foreplay-gone-wrong, and the Phantom just forgets to say his safeword in time (This is why you pre-negotiate about your kinks, all!).

Any movie-goer understands what the intent of scenes like these are, why a director would choose these actions & shots; they want us to know that they are getting busy off camera, even if only by implication. We know they don't actually do that because there is a book to refer back to but damn does this movie want us to forget that...in these scenes. Which is the problem, of course - the rest of the movie operates as normal! In the above scene Christine thinks the Phantom is, again I must emphasize this, the ghost of her father; apparently she is going for the reverse-Oedipus achievement but no one told the rest of the script. Is she lying to Raoul about her love and her reasons? Is she actually tempted? Stop telling me you are unlovable via haunted monologues Gerard Butler, you look like testosterone on a stick and y'all boned literally five minutes ago, I am not buying it!

The subtext and the text are at war with each other - and given that, as we established, the dynamic between the Phantom & Christine is really the only interesting part about this story, strip that down to a muddled mess and you really have nothing left. And in a movie, subtext like this is just another form of text - the director chose these shots, it's intended. Beyond the terrible vocal performances and sometimes baffling shot direction, the movie's biggest failing is this schizophrenic mismatch between the script and the actions on screen which is a problem the stage musical honestly didn't have to worry about. These scenes are not set up like this, and the ability to add subtext by the actors is just fundamentally limited by the medium; it cannot touch the story itself, which isn't even the focus of the audiences. Even if these contradictions did exist more in the stage musical, they wouldn't doom it due to the nature of said medium.

Which is very, very fortunate, because there is one final point to make - Andrew Lloyd Weber, the creator of the stage musical, wholeheartedly approved of this direction for the movie. He produced the film, wrote the screenplay, chose the director, the works - this is his film. And, as is apparently from interviews and a...not fondly remembered stage sequel to the musical that he wrote, he ships the Phantom and Christine hard. Not in the "oh I love their dynamic on screen way", but in the Ao3 sort-by-fetish-tags "they are my Trash'' way. And I would never begrudge a man his ships, but apparently he was not content to keep it away from the canon. He absolutely reads the stage musical this way as well!  It's just one of those interesting ironies of life - one of the most successful adaptations of a book to a stage musical was made by someone who, in my opinion, did not grasp the fundamentals of the story he was adapting. We just didn't notice because the medium didn't care, and also damn can he write a score that slaps.

I would not be the first person to say that this movie for Andrew Lloyd Weber is something of a George Lucas moment for him, a creator completely missing the appeal of his own work; but after seeing it the comparison rang deeply true. The Phantom of the Opera movie is truly the Phantom Menace of musicals.

No, I don't feel bad for that last line, why do you ask?

[babyitsacrime]

1, 22, 23, and 43 for the OC asks.

First off, I apologize for my absolutely atrocious grammar here and also the fact that I just can’t seem to put things into words.

Secondly I wrote this in a different app and then copy pasted so the formatting is a little whack.

1. Your first OC ever?

Oh gosh this one is a little hard to answer. I think Natalia’s my first OC that I ever fully wrote well but me and my friends used to write a lot of stories/fanfiction in middle school so I have some characters from there too that might be older than Nat. Also there’s like three different versions of Nat (Quizup, Next Gen, and the Nat I have now) , and again the one I have right now is by far the most developed/closest to a whole character.

Okay but I talk about Nat a lot so even though I’m not sure which one actually came first I’ll talk about a character I had in the Homestuck fanfiction my friends and I wrote in middle school. (before you ask, yes it’s the 100 page one I’m pretty sure) (also I’m ignoring the self inserts me n my friends made for our other stories bc those don’t count as ocs and I refuse to accept them as characters dhdksjdjs) But basically she’s a troll named Ninmah Aurora. She was heavily based off of Kanaya Maryam, the iconic Homestuck vampire fashion designer lesbian character so that was interesting. And even though I didn’t actually write that much for her she’s one of my favorite characters because I had so much fun writing her with my friends. Anyways can’t believe I just exposed myself as a Homestuck stan on main but you know what it’s fine.

22. Is there any OC of yours that people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how?

Okay there’s a couple and most of them are small things so I’ll just go by character.

Natalia -

let me just start by saying this: it still baffles me why y’all think she’s cool cshdjsj. She’s kinda a dumb bitch if I’m being honest. Like, don’t get me wrong, she’s super smart and could easily outwit me and honestly any of us, but she’s also plain stupid sometimes in other ways. But like, on the other side of the coin I feel like she almost doesn’t get taken seriously sometimes? I feel like that’s a little on me for usually making jokes at her expense but while she is clueless as to how people function she’s also not plain dumb. A lot of what she says and does is well calculated and even when she does something in the spur of the moment it’s always something logical to her. Hn I don’t know if I’m explaining this right but 🤷♀️. But basically she’s not really cool but also she’s not stupid. (Okay ig being good at Quidditch is pretty cool but that’s not my point)

Also I don’t know why but some people (very few people but it’s still annoying to me) seem to think that her being bi is a huge part of her personality when it’s really not. While she is bi, not everything she does is motivated by that fact if that makes any sense. Like for example, if she’s wearing be a rainbow dress it’s not because she’s (and I quote) "team gay" it’s because she liked the damn dress. Okay I’m rambling now but all I’m saying is that it kinda annoys me when people see her being bi as a hugely defining personality trait. Also she isn’t the only character I notice this happens to.

Ishaan -

Similarly to Nat, whole he does enjoy pranking and such, he’s actually a serious person most of the time. Think of him as more of like a serious and skeptical person who also has a good sense of humor. Although I will say that he does sometimes go out of his way to make a joke sometimes, that’s only sometimes and mostly just to annoy Priya.

Lysander -

Another case of the being gay isn’t his personality. Also??? He’s not gay??? I don’t really know where that came from (like I know who mentioned it to me but I have no clue where she got that from aside from just assuming?) for the record, he is also bi and has a slight preference for girls (mostly bc he likes having an s/o shorter than him but we won’t go into that rn). *slams fists on table* jUST BECAUSE HES FUNNY DOESNT MEAN HES THE TOKEN GAY FRIEND OKAY (okay okay I’m done ranting time to continue)

I also feel like his joking nature is often seen as a sign of him not being as a lack of intellect, but that is in no way true. While he isn’t a genius or anything, he’s a little smarter than average, yet still prone to making dumb decisions because he is still a child. But with more life experience he’ll make smarter decisions while still retaining a joking demeanor.

Priya -

I’m going to keep this one short, but she isn’t as cold and cruel as I sometimes make her seem when I talk about her. I feel like this one’s mostly on me but yeah, she’s a caring person for the most part, just a little misguided and/or dramatic at times.

~I think that’s all of them but I might be wrong? Also none of those explanations make a lot of sense I’m sorry 😔~

23. Introduce an OC that has changed from what your first idea considering what the character would be like.

*drags Nat out again* Here you go.

So I mentioned earlier that there’s like three different versions of her, but in all reality they almost feel like different characters with the same name. However I will say that Next Gen Nat and the Nat I have now (I like to call it her final form bc I think I’m finally happy with her) are similar in many many aspects. But I’ll talk about this Nat because I like her the best and she’s the only Nat I actively use. She was originally intended to be a lot colder/closed off than she is. (Think a lot closer to Aster, but I think pep also had a similar thing with him.) She just ended up becoming a lot softer and a little friendlier than I intended her to be. I’m not exactly unhappy with that though, I feel like this actually added a bit more dimension to her character and it actually gave me a little more room to improve her. It was also bound to happen anyways, especially with the characters she’s friends with/will be friends with. So yeah, it’s interesting and honestly I feel like I’m happy with the changes from what I originally intended her to be.

Hm while I’m here I guess I should also talk about Taemoon.

I don’t know that his personality changed much from my original intent, but his story and intent definitely did. He started as a character that exuded a lack of hope. I don’t know if that sentence makes a lot of sense, but he was originally going to have no chance at happiness in the end. He was supposed to let all of his anger and hurt consume him, making him hell bent on revenge, which would only push him further from anything that could make him happy, but I feel like the end of his story is a lot more hopeful now. I don’t know exactly what it is, but ever since pep asked if Jae Hong could adopt him Taemoon’s life story has become something a lot less disheartening. Now I’ve given him a lot more to live for, and a lot more to make him happy. First off, instead of being alone he now has a family that he quickly grows to trust, and a group of friends with similar experiences that basically become family as well. While he is still very revenge driven, he has a lot more to his life than just that; most importantly he has people he trusts that will keep him from becoming consumed by all of his anger. But yeah, he has become a much more hopeful character as a whole and honestly. I feel like that’s what I really needed. Idk about everyone else but I feel like changing his story to the way it is now really has helped me to feel a lot better in general.

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favor certain traits or looks?

Oh god it’s time to confess 😔🤙

So, as most of you have figured out, most of my ocs tend to be very attractive and very capable (and willing) to step on me. If they’re not that then they’re in the minority.

Aside from being physically attractive as a whole, I’d say that in regards to looks, the more they look like they haven’t slept in weeks and are ready to kill a man, the better. If not that, then it’s an oc that looks like I could cuddle with them for hours on end. There’s no in between.

As for traits I tend to favor, probably the most popular is a bad attitude. If you take a look at some of my most used and/or favorite characters, you’ll find that in most cases the snarkier the better. Honestly this is true of characters that aren’t even mine, I just really have a type. At the same time though, I like these characters to have a secret soft side even if it’s only for one other character they care about. On the flip side, I also like writing characters that are genuinely the nicest people you’ll ever meet. I don’t know why but I just love them so much they are truly my children.

Also. Characters that grin in the face of danger? *chefs kiss* I like characters where you question if what they’re doing is out of courage or a death wish. For this reason so many of my characters play some kind of dangerous sport or enjoy dueling, you get what I mean. This goes for both my Edgy™️ characters as well as my soft characters.

Additionally, I do have a lot of characters that are wealthy. Uh. I think that mostly speaks for itself so I’m not going to comment on it any further than this.

Also. Flowers. For some reason I go for faceclaims that eat flowers. It’s not even something I actively seek out??? Like I’ll find someone cute and I’ll be scrolling through pictures and there they are. Eating a flower. This mostly goes for my guy fcs but yeah. Idk how it happens but it just does and I’ve come to accept it.

[ghoultyrant]

FoZ Notes 22

Okay, here we go, final volume of the series. Not likely to be much added value here, but I took these notes regardless, so I’m posting them.

---------------------------------

We open with a bit about Brimir and Sasha, showing he put the Lífþrasir rune on her to potentially avert catastrophe while really hoping he didn't have to do so. It seems to be implied he doesn't want to get Sasha killed, but it's ambiguous and could be taken as him not wanting to nuke the Elves or something of the sort. Looking back after reading the rest of the volume... I honestly have no idea how this is meant to be taken.

The narrative refers to Colbert as being one of the 'rare realists' of Halkegina. That's... morbidly comedic in how grossly wrong it is, but there you go: Colbert is supposed to be a realist in the pessimistic sense of 'that sounds too good to be true, so it probably isn't true'.

Vitorrio apparently already knows that the place Saito comes from is 'the holy land'. I... have far too many questions...

Vitorrio dumps on us a backstory about how Brimir being God or Jesus-analogue is a lie and actually Brimir came from Earth and all magical nobles come from Earth having fled from the technology-using humans who are our ancestors. This is dumb nonsense, but foreshadowed dumb nonsense. Much worse is Vitorrio randomly claiming commoners haven't awakened to their magical power as an inevitable consequence of 'the blood thinning', where returning to Earth is supposed to be a solution. HOW???

If magic is a genetically inherited thing where breeding with non-mages is 'diluting' magical blood and reducing the portion of the population who can do magic, going back to Earth with it's technophile non-mage population is the OPPOSITE of a solution to magic power fading. Furthermore, how did we end up with mages in a minority in the first place? Did the original mages actually run away with a massive population of non-mages? If so, why? Were they slaves? SO MANY slaves that Halkeginia is predominantly non-mages? 'cause if so I have zero sympathy for the population that became Halkeginians.

Furthermore, Halkeginia is FILLED with magical races! If Vittorio wants to make magical humans the default form of human and the narrative is going to invoke magical eugenics while making Vitorrio entirely amoral in pursuit of his goals, the correct solution is to fight to overcome human prejudice against elves and orcs and other demihumans and in fact attempt to institutionally encourage cross-species breeding between commoners and assorted magical species. It's not like this series has been shy about sexualizing eg Tabitha's dragon when she's in human form, so you can’t tell me the series is shying away from bestiality undertones!

But no, Vitorrio's True Plan For Real This Time is literally to conquer Earth in some insane, nonsensical attempt to Get Magic Back. And of course nobody calls him on this being utterly insane nonsense that cannot POSSIBLY accomplish his stated goal.

Okay, and he also wants to conquer Earth to escape the Wind Stone-based catastrophe, with eyebrow-raising logic about how surely nobles will survive it just fine and only commoners will die, but seriously the magic genetics bit is blatant, horrifying nonsense, and it’s Vittorio’s inner thoughts so there’s no room to headcanon it as a lie or something else that would excuse this awfulness.

Also Vitorrio magically gets to drain Saito's life force as a side effect of opening the door. No explanation or justification provided. Just... loldrama.

This conveniently causes Saito to go into an Expositional Flashback™ in which he meets Brimir again and Brimir conveys that he's trying to kill all elves everywhere because "we can't understand each other", with this somehow supposed to be connected to magic stone catastrophe stuff. So, you know, stuff we already knew that doesn't make any more sense than last time.

When we cut back to Louise and company, we learn they immediately screwed off to wring their hands over Saito's unconscious form, instead of fighting Vitorrio’s horrible plan. Really?

Louise is explicitly willing to DIE to prevent Earth from being invaded... but no one entertains the notion of eg killing Vitorrio to stop his nonsense. Nah, they're going to try to talk him out of his insane plan. Really?

Henrietta is now using -dono when referring to Saito. Are you kidding me?

Henrietta and Vitorrio magically recognize a relatively modern pistol as being better than Halkeginian firearms... by just looking at the pistol laying around. Not testing it and seeing it has superior performance, or even remarking on something like it being made of parts too fine for a smith to pull together so precisely. Just... magically knowing it's good on sight.

Vitorrio also reveals that Earthlings have somehow invaded Halkeginian in ages past via a never-before-established natural portal between the world's, and now claims he wants to hit Earth before Earth figures out how to harness the Void (Why he thinks non-mages will be ABLE to do so goes unexplained) and attacks Halkeginian. This is ALMOST like a sensible, coherent motivation, but requires ignoring how contradictory and insane the premise is.

Turns out Vitorrio somehow knows for a fact that Louise can cancel the Wind Stone catastrophe, but is withholding this information from everyone to try to force people into going with the Conquer Earth plan. This is dumb, but plausible human dumb. Much dumber is the narrative talking directly to the audience to reveal that Julio is being left out because he's totally unsuited to deception and is actually a naive innocent sort... in utter contravention of literally EVERY prior scene Julio was in.

The Romalian church steals a nuke from under the sea, and Julio magically surmises its principles and informs Vitorrio that it's operating on Void principles. So... Void magic is now supposed to just be atomic shenanigans? I'm pretty sure the narrative previously heavily implied they're quantum shenanigans and regular magic is somehow atomic shenanigans. Consistency!

Pegasi are apparently a thing in Halkeginia. I don't think such came up before and it feels like a poor fit, but it's been a while since I last read so I might be forgetting something is all.

It's now being retconned in that Saito being the Lífþrasir familiar means that A: ANYONE using Void magic will tap Saito's life, and B: he will die in a matter of days for no good reason even if nobody taps his life force any further. Really? That admittedly makes the earlier bit of Saito collapsing into an Expositional Flashback™ a part of this retcon instead of pure arbitrariness, but this is a blatant, stupid retcon that cannot possibly be reconciled with prior events.

Derflinger is continuing to absorb magic while 'asleep', which I'm pretty sure contradicts what happened in prior volumes.

Also, Saito is perfectly willing to attack Romalian forces in an attempt to stop them from using nukes... but people continue to completely ignore any possibility of attacking Vitorrio himself. What is this garbage?

We get introduced to the Vysendal, Tristan's royal flagship built to carry dragons for the fight with Albion... which we somehow never heard about the many volumes ago it should've cropped up in. It’s basically a fantasy aircraft carrier airship.

Three loud knocks followed by two quiet knocks is how Agnes announces herself to Henrietta, apparently, and it's apparently forbidden for anyone else in the Tristainian palace to use this knock. O...Kay?

Bizarrely, Henrietta is of the opinion Saito would never cause trouble without a good reason. Attempted-rapist Saito, you mean? The Saito who has picked fights with people over issues of ego? That Saito? Mind, she barely knows him to be honest, but that just shifts the issue elsewhere. Hell, she even describes him as 'not hot-blooded', which is just laughably wrong.

We get introduced to Château d'If, which is an Elven prison. This is a little confusing given Elves have always solved these kinds of problems with exile or murder historically, but okay. Really, I'm more baffled by the French-sounding name, given Gallia is Not-France and the Elves haven't previously had Frenchness to them. In any event, it's an island prison off the shore of Eumenes, which... seems unlikely...

Also, it's directly named after a real place. Oh, and the narrative draws attention to the French naming, saying the name means 'prison island's in Gallian... but doesn't explain WHY it's named in a language Elves sneer at.

We get explicitly told only Elves that have committed serious crimes, such as treason, get locked up here. You know, the kinds of crimes we previously got told got Elves exiled. We also get told the island has been nearly totally abandoned by the Great Will (for some reason...) so Elves can't use Ancient Magic on it... except apparently the guards can due to making contracts of some sort, in contravention of prior Ancient Magic mechanics.

... and now Guiche is joining in on the 'Saito wouldn't make trouble without a good reason' nonsense train. He actually kind of knows Saito! Not only that but he's repeatedly projected his own shitty behavior onto Saito! He's very nearly the last character I'd buy this belief from!

The 'Great Will' is supposedly a giant chunk of magic rock (I forget if this already came up or if I’m getting mixed up by having run across some spoilers in earlier note-taking), and it grounding arbitrarily accumulating spiritual energy periodically is what causes the Wind Stone disaster stuff. We get this info from Brimir, with no explanation of how he drew this conclusion.

The story also throws in a line about how even blowing up the Wind Stones with Void magic isn't a valid answer because yadda yadda exhaustion. Honestly, this looks like a Suspiciously Specific Denial, like readers raised exactly this possibility, and the author is going 'shit, that's a really good point, but I can't have my intended drama if that's a valid answer so I've gotta invent a reason why it isn't'. Because seriously, with the scale of destructiveness Void magic is capable of, particularly considering how much the story is playing it up... yeah, blowing the Wind Stones up really ought to be a valid answer.

Compounding this is that Brimir explains his plan to prevent the Wind Stone disaster was... to blew up the Great Will. And it apparently worked. So the story is just contradicting itself; which is it? Explosions aren’t helpful, or explosions are helpful? It can’t be both.

Oh, and there's drama about how Brimir tried to explain his plan to the Elves, but they refused to move their city away from the Great Will so he could nuke it without killing them, with Elven leaders saying that if the Great Will wants the world destroyed then so be it and Brimir also remarking arbitrarily that the city at the foot of the Great Will would be the only place safe from the Wind Stone disaster so the story is kind of implying the Elves are actually going 'well, we'll be fine, so we don't care if you all die'.

Anyway, Brimir was pushed over the edge into nuking the area because his home village was slaughtered by Elves while he was trying to talk the Elves into letting him nuke the Great Will. So honestly this is revenge in part. (No explanation is ever offered for why they slaughtered his village, incidentally)

We also learn Sasha killing Brimir was in response to nuking the Elven city, and that Brimir let himself be killed, at least in part to free Sasha of her Familiar runes so the arbitrary death-by-being Lífþrasir won't kick in.

A recurring thing in this final volume is that the Gandalfr boost for just holding a weapon lets Saito function in spite of being heavily weakened. As in, he literally cannot stand, and then holding a weapon let's him walk, and in fact fight athletically.

There's a surprisingly clever moment during Tabitha and Saito's escape where she summons some water to use it as a reflective surface to check around a corner. It's just a variation on using a hand mirror to check around corners, but if characters had been using magic in this kind of way the whole time I'd be a lot more willing to overlook the series' many, many flaws.

We get told the Knights of Parterre are good at casting spells undetected... no explanation for how this works... and that Tabitha has mastered this skill, too. Ambush spellcasting is a neat idea, admittedly, but the context this is being invoked in is just confusing to invoke it in.

There's a bit about Elves being helpless if they can't complete magical chants. It's been a while, but I'm pretty sure previously part of what made Elves scary-powerful was that Markey needed to chant and Elves did not. Certainly, I remember for sure that Markey were chanters the whole time, which is conspicuously failing to be mentioned in this volume...

Aaaand now the story is saying Saito being emotionally moved by his rescuers (Louise not being among them, note) is helping to power his Gandalfr abilities, trampling on that whole 'powered by love' thing. Really? Like, it’s a dumb plotpoint, but undermining it by making emotions-in-general provide power has a lot of thematic and practical problems.

Vittorio's other name is Serevare, apparently. I presume that's his personal name, though it's not actually clear. I don't think this has been alluded to before. In any event, him spending a night praying is able to make mountains rise from underwater. 'cause Void magic. The exact justification provided is that he's specifically manipulating the magic Stone with Void magic, but this just raises obvious questions about the potential to use this capability to address the Wind Stone catastrophe, since those are also magic stones of the exact same sort. Sure, Vitorrio is lying about being unable to deal with the crisis, but nobody within the story notices this. Even with how low my opinion is of the intelligence of these characters, I can't suspend disbelief over this. It's a gaping hole in the argument Vitorrio is using to coerce Louise into helping him invade Earth. The story HAS to address this, and it doesn’t, instead stacking on drama scene after drama scene even as it rips out their foundations as they’re being pushed.

We get told Gandalfr powers can't actually compensate for lost vitality (even though that's exactly what Saito has been doing for a while now), but Derflinger can do so. (Never mind that he was re-acquired only minutes before this claim) Gandalfr powers can 'only' make Saito light as a feather. Yeah, just ignore this nonsense, it's just a crappy attempt to say Saito is even closer to death than ever before without actually impairing him in combat scenes any.

You remember how Derflinger has Convenient Magical Memory Loss? Yeah, while he was 'asleep' he got rid of that. Gosh. How convenient. And no, the story isn't going to try to explain why he didn't do this sooner, or explain how he knew how to do it now. Admittedly it's completely in-character for Derflinger to create problems for no actual reason while claiming to be helping... with the qualifier that's clearly not meant to be part of his character.

This is dumb and arbitrary, is what I'm getting at.

"Wow, even swords can cry." "No I won't, because then I'd rust." Wow, that's actually a great exchange that legit got me to laugh.

Holy crap, the story also remembered about crow familiars being used as serial scouts. That last showed up, what, 15 volumes ago?

Vitorrio apparently deliberately aims the portal at a US army base. At least, that's how Saito's internal narration presents it, but I'm pretty sure this is just the writer talking directly at the audience. This is presented as a sensible and intelligent course of action, which is confusing given I'd think Vitorrio would want to get his entire army on the other side before they had to face resistance. Even considering how intrinsically dumb his entire plan is, this is just confusing.

Turns out the Gandalfr killing their master makes Void magic go away. Because Reasons. So naturally Louise has committed suicide-by-Saito, to save his life. I cannot express in words how thoroughly I hate this stupid, monstrous, lazy culmination.

Then the story doubles down on the stupid, lazy, monstrous writing by having Derflinger commit suicide to revive Louise.

Bafflingly, Louise mourns Derflinger. I honestly cannot think of a single even marginally positive interaction the two had to justify this response. Like sure fine I can buy her feeling grateful for his sacrifice -ignoring how garbage everything about the sacrifice and its leadup is- but the story has her reminiscing about how he was 'always helping' and all. Conspicuously, where Saito flashbacks to a bunch of Actual Prior Events when mourning Louise's death, Louise doesn't name even a single incident in which Derflinger was helpful. So the writer can't remember any such moment either, and just hopes readers won't notice the lack.

Also, in literally the final volume, the place Saito was originally summoned finally has a name: Austri Plaza. Uh. Sure?

Cattleya gets convenient 'secret Elf medicine's to cure her incurable condition. So never mind that bit of respect I had for the series.

Louise permanently awakens to wind magic, because of course she does.

The elemental siblings show up, and we get told they're... vampire-human hybrids??? What? Did that crop up before and I just totally forgot?...

Oh, and Louise and Saito go live Happily Ever After in Japan after a bunch of drama is wrung out of Saito intending to first stay in Halkeginia and then more drama was wrung out of him deciding to go home even though it meant being separated from Louise. The story conspicuously fails to address how this could possibly work out well; Louise has pink hair, and is unlikely to completely avoid using her magic. She’s going to end up on an MiB dissection table in no time flat, frankly, not live happily ever after. This isn’t even touching on how messed-up it is for Louise to throw away her life in Halkeginia to follow Saito back; she has responsibilities of myriad sorts in Halkeginia. Heck, so does Saito at this point! Whereas back in Japan, the story has consistently indicated Saito’s parents are literally the only people who will notice or care about him going missing.

For that matter, there was this whole thing with Siesta, Louise, and Saito working out a three-person relationship, and while I found it cringe-y and was dubious because of the likely motives, this is just throwing that out by summarily cutting out Siesta. And also trashing the creepy, stupid crap with Tabitha and Henrietta loving Saito for no actual reason.

This ending is awful and antithetical to what lead up to it on so many levels.

-----------------------------------------------

So that’s it, I’m done taking notes on this series. I have a few things I’ll be saying in the coming weeks, but the note-taking is done, finally.

[chippedteakettle]

GOT rant

I think the most wildly frustrating thing about this ENTIRE game of thrones debacle is that I can’t even remember the last time I felt this thoroughly invalidated about the way I feel.

I am a writer and I love stories, but most of all I love CHARACTERS. I have a passion for editing stories and smoothing things out to make character arcs feel believable and like the dialogue and choices ring true and feel as natural them as possible. And as such, I feel like I have a good eye and solid intuition about when things feel a bit off the rails, but every single time I have spoken up about the dissonance within season 8, I have been hushed.

I have been told that I can’t say the show is making incorrect or “wrong” choices because it’s not my creation- that I therefore am being unreasonable in my own right if I critique the writing or say it seems lazy or poorly fleshed out or straight up bizarre. That I am a hater for using my ability to employ critical thinking.I have been tossed the age old insult that I am both too invested and also somehow clearly missing things. I have been told that others are “even more on dany’s side than me” or that they “love her just as much as me, but this was the only obvious outcome and it’s clear through the entire series.” Wanting something that simply made sense means I am being an ignorant thrones fan who just wants a “happy ending.” “BS. If everyone including dany dies in the end for a justifiable, believable reason and its how the entire show ends, I wouldn’t enjoy it but I could understand it and that’s truly all I’m asking for. I am so sick of being shushed and silenced....

And it’s ALL by my peers who are MALE fans of the show. Every woman I know who loves this franchise LOVES the dimension of dany and feels robbed. But every man I’ve spoken to personally in my small corner of the world is perfectly content with the crazy ex girlfriend logic being implemented in this show and I find it both invalidating and absolutely bonkers. To have my sound logic rebutted with flat, non dimensional absolutes that dany is just an angry emotional woman who’s lost everything and this was unavoidable because of her Targaryen blood is absolutely staggering. I have never been so heartbroken- not only for her, but for myself and the women I love that this is readily acceptable. Like what the actual heck?

And I am sick and tired of being told over and over and over again that this seasons ONLY issue was being rushed. I am completely over some of the smartest people I know repeating the rationale they were spoonfed by D&D as if they are valid factors behind the character’s choices and motivations. I am BEYOND baffled by the amount of smart, intellectual men that I have seen who fully accept this atrocity of a season at face value and BELIEVE that every choice Danaerys made in the last two episodes was fully validated, justified and foreshadowed and made apparent in a clear, obvious way throughout the entire series. That is garbage.

What was FORESHADOWED was the battle against the dead. What was FORESHADOWED was the power of the three eyed raven. What was FORESHADOWED was the prince who was promised and the intervention of the lord of light. What was FORESHADOWED was Jon’s Targaryen lineage and ultimate legitimacy and how it would eventually affect him.

And all of these legitimately foreshadowed things were all chucked out with the rubbish to pick up these random threads that they tried to weave into something that ultimately fell apart.... now I will concede that Dany was made increasingly cold and absolute in both her decision making and emotions approaching season 8. Dany is depicted as ruthless when exacting justice with the potential to go too far. That is very valid. There are hints of her potentially going too far and it having dire ramifications and potentially little remorse. I did not like this choice but it IS plausible. But what she does to Kings landing and the scale in which she does it has nothing to do with vengeance , retribution or justice- It’s just illogical. And that’s why it doesn’t fit....

a monarch who intends to protect the downtrodden suddenly becoming an intentional blind mass murderer of innocents who have already surrendered to her because her council betrays her and she decides to rule a dead city by fear MAKES NO SENSE! call it foreshadowing all you want but it’s an inconsistent plot point within a well established character.

A character having the potential for a poor decision based on their flaws is NOT the same thing as telling us it was the unavoidable conclusion to her tale. You cannot make a human character without giving them flaws. The existence of those flaws is not proof that the flaws will inevitably undo them. It only shows that there is a chance for something to happens.... not a direct indicator. The characters code of ethics, core beliefs, and level of self awareness still dictate how much power their shortcomings will have over them and how much they will indulge in their weakness. And with danaerys, despite her temper and despite her “divine right of kings” mentality that the iron throne should belong to a a Targaryen, there is SO MUCH MORE EVIDENCE to the validity of her good nature overruling her darker inclinations. At this point, she has been failed by her advisors, but she still wishes to make Westeros a better safer place, take back her birthright, avenge her fallen children and friends and be a better Targaryen than those before her. So it makes no sense for her to hurt civilians....Because Danaerys above all, wants to be a good ruler. She wants to be ruler who inspires love and deserves it. This is clear when she told Jon point blank in season 7 that she hopes she deserves the gift of both his faith in her and the faith of the north backing her. She makes this incredibly genuine confession even in the wake of handling the heart crushing loss of her first dragon and child. This is something that would typically consume her with grief, but she is instead concerned with the world at large and hoping she is worthy of the trust bestowed upon her.

This is not the sentiment of a cruel unreasonable tyrant. It is the true heart of Danaerys Targaryen. It is an indicator of humility, objectivity and positive potential. It is an indicator of the fact that she DOES deserve love and loyalty. That caring about whether or not she deserves the sacrifices others make for her will drive her to make wise, good choices that benefit those who support her and ultimately benefit the world at large because she considers the ramifications of her actions and how they affect the people while none of the other rulers of Westeros have.

The complete abandonment of her prior sense of justice and self awareness in her dialogue in the throne room in episode 6 is inconsistent with a ruler who never wanted to be her father. Her logic is tyrannical then and *out of character*- then she dips back into being madly in love with Jon : not because she is crazy but because this monologue is incohesive and needs revision!

As a woman who has been sweet and soft her entire life, I am so done with being trampled on by boys and their incoherent rhetoric. I was abused my entire life and sexually taken advantage of by a man I called my husband at the time. I am not as sweet and delicate as I used to be prior to that. I’ve had seasons where I lost absolutely everything and it devastated me. And at my core I am the same girl, but I have more grit now. I stand up for myself and I have more strength to assert myself and stand up for those around me. Not because of my abuse (Sansa), but in spite of it. I get walked over less and am honest and driven while still being idealistic...But none of that makes me ”MAD”. Those are not symptoms of insanity or depravity. Nor are they evidence that should I systematically lose everything all over again that I would commit mass murder. No, Madness is not what danaerys suffers from. Danaerys suffered from being written in a short sighted, poorly plotted way that was inconsistent with her heart and narrative.

Danaerys was being tipped in a direction that certainly contained much more chilling absoluteness, but that DOES NOT justify ANYTHING. If that is the rationale alone, then Sansa is the same character! Other characters, including female characters in this show, have done heinous things but there is NO other character who was labeled as entirely beyond salvation after a *single* choice. And that is another nail in the coffin of this backwards logic!!

Tyrion betrayed her and undermined and redirected her so many times but still lived to tell jon to kill her BECAUSE SHE WAS LOYAL ENOUGH TO HIM TO LET HIM LIVE EVEN AFTER TELLING HIM HIS NEXT BETRAYAL WOULD BE HIS LAST! if dany is truly “mad,” then there should be nothing at all holding her back from slaughtering him where he stands on the stone steps of kings landing when he insults and disrespects her in front of her entire army-but she doesn’t! She civiliy has him removed and chained and allows him visitors!!!! Yeah, what a completely irrational despot.

And even if she DID kill him, it would be because it was EARNED! He committed treason more than once and prioritized her enemies over her despite being HER hand. This was the FIRST Thing she does that is out of whack and they suddenly think she’s going to murder Jon snow because of a fear of his legitimacy? She’s never so much as raised her voice at him! So why in God’s name would she kills him?

She’s begged him, she’s shown him her desperation and vulnerability and fear and desire to connect with him, and shown him in every way she can that SHE is still on HIS side but after a single (albeit brutal) action, she is only bad and purely unsalvagable? What? Even Theon Greyjoy got a better redemption arc than that and he literally burned two little boys to death!

Can we also address the fact that Dany knew of John’s bloodline for nearly the ENTIRE season and does not breathe a word of it to anyone, even when her back is against the wall at dragonstone and everyone she trusts has failed her. It has not even occurred to her to betray him because regardless of what anyone else may say or think, danaerys is LOYAL, almost to a fault. She never treats John any differently outside of being shocked the moment it’s revealed and still continues to love and seek him out, desiring closeness with him as he pushes her out, because she still wishes to be with him regardless. Because she is not petty or terrified that he will steal people’s love from her. Even if she realizes she is out of place in the north, it never occurs to her to betray his confidence.

While goddang Sansa can’t even keep her petty sharp tongued mouth shut for a whole thirty minutes before she rats out his secret for her own short sighted benefit because she’s what?jealous of danaerys and thinks she’s smarter than John?

But sansa is openly praised in the aftermath of this series as our queen in the north !? For what? For being a snake? For ruining John’s life and getting the brother she wished to hold close exiled beyond the wall and suddenly being unable to form a single word to defend him in that council when she knows good and well that she started this and it’s her fault but she’s articulate enough not one breath later to ask for the north’s independence???? For seceding from Westeros when her own brother is king just so the whole world knows for sure just how racist and xenophobic the north is- not by tradition but by choice? For being an unoriginal, unclever mean girl who hates danaerys because she’s different and is jealous that she’s a queen and then Sansa gets her way and ruins her in the least strategic, most sloppy, pettiness fueled way ever? But Sansa is considered a beloved character by most men in the end while Dany is fed to the absolute wolves???? What?!

Danaerys has never lied or betrayed her word. She has always had a reason for every action she did. And in the world of game of thrones, she is not surrounded by innocent lambs. Tyrion is a murderer who’s gone free more than once. Jon broke his vows to the nights watch. Varys has hatched more murderous plots than can be counted- including plots aimed at Dany’s own life. Sansa was stone faced as she watched Ramsay die just as dany was at the death of Viserys. Arya has murders countless people- even to the depravity of feeding someone their own children in a pie. Tywin Lannister was calculating, cruel, vicious and treacherous and was a part of countless battles, rebellions and murders- including the red wedding. JAMIE LANNISTER PUSHED A SMALL CHILD OUT A GODDANG WINDOW AND CRIPPLED HIM FOR LIFE just so he could go back to rutting into his own sister in peace. Excuse me? what?? But none of these characters were killed after their FIRST offense. None of them had their internal motivations chocked up to a lazy shoulder shrug of “eh, grief, man. Never know what a woman will do. B*tches be crazy man. Guess I should’ve seen it coming. Signs were probably there all along-she did kill all those evil men tho.” Nor were ANY- not a single one of them- labeled “mad.”

“Mad” is someone like Craster who was beyond all morality and consistently showed a horrific lack of care for human life. “Mad” is someone like Ramsay Bolton who caused dismemberment, torture and rape for FUN. Danaerys Targaryen is not even close to being in this eschalon for a single choice. “Madness” in this particular universe is based on a series of repetitive, consistent patterns that continually choose the inhumane option because of no justifiable reason other than “because they want to”, and that’s just not what we’re working with here.

Dany has a temper. Dany can threaten fire and blood all she wants, but at the end of the day, she doesn’t blindly swing her axe. She is strategic and intentional. And above all else, she does not want to be queen of the ashes- she does not wish to be the next Targaryen to perpetuate crimes of cruelty. She’s already lived with an abusive brother and been haunted by the stories of her seemingly unhinged, possibly schizophrenic father. She shapes each choice she makes to help her become a ruler who only encites fear in the heart of those who wish to do evil, not in the common man. She wishes to liberate and free those who have been oppressed like her- like she is still being crushed, misused and mistreated by the people around her in season 8, episode 5.

So for her to suddenly snap and just take the choice of life away from thousands of innocent people and children in an instant to prove that what- she can if she wants to? MAKES NO SENSE. She wouldn’t harm innocents ESPECIALLY WHEN IT IS AVOIDABLE AND SERVES NO PURPOSE!!! how does she risk everything she’s worked for to save all of humanity only to decimate the entire city she wishes to rule from in the span of 2 episodes??? Because what? she’s pouty that John won’t kiss her back? THAT IS NONSENSE. And it doesn’t even touch on the fact that CERSEI IS STILL IN THE CASTLE ! So if rage and grief are the “motivators” then why in the heck would she burn down the civilians of the city she wishes to rule and the leave the red keep virtually untouched while woman responsible for murdering missandei is still inside if vengeance is her game at this point? TELL ME HOW THAT MAKES SENSE. Oh you can’t? You know why? Because it doesn’t!

Either you make her full tilt crazy or let her be Dany, but don’t you dare mix the two and tell me it made a lick of sense. Or tell me that I’m being unreasonable just because I’m a girl who related to dany’s original arc. That’s nonsense. If this is a case of hereditary mental instability then where the heck are the signs?? Because even her fathers descent into madness was GRADUAL. He didn’t just wake up one day and light half the city on fire because he felt consumed by a certain mood- even psychotic breaks don’t work that way. If we’re looking at facts like they keep asking me to, targaryen madness was a long, grueling, arduous descent into chaos that broke Jamie Lannisters heart to watch.

So don’t you dare turn around and suddenly make Tyrion instigate her death just so you can a shitty parallel of both Targaryen monarchs being taken out by Lannisters they trusted or try to tell me that Dany being stabbed in a way she wasn’t suspecting by someone she loved is some kind of Targaryen poetic justice allusion to her father being run through the back when his chaos had reached its apex. Don’t you dare make me look her in the eye while her loving gaze collapses into confusion, hurt and disbelief as John plunges that stupid dishonorable knife in her. That was wrong. Just plain wrong. And none of us should have had to see it.

The “turn” of danaerys Targaryen was unfounded, unwarranted and sloppily executed, and I am tired of being spoken down to like I’m a dumb little girl for believing in this character and despising where they took her and how she got there.

Mic drop

[takaraphoenix]

Shadowhunters Finale Review

...I can’t even summarize my thoughts properly right now because I am just so wildly exhausted and disappointed and frustrated, so here’s the unfiltered running commentary I made during the two-parter, sorted by characters and due to length beneath the cut:

On Jonathan:

Jonathan back at it again, killing flowers. ~puuure eeeviiil~ (Sorry. Still not over Jocelyn being a fucking dickhead who is ready to murder her son over one dead flower he killed as a toddler...)

...I just... I'm so tired of what they did with Jonathan? When they set him up as Sebastian Verlac, he seemed to layered, but this season, they are completely reducing him to the Incest Boi whose only motivation is “Clary doesn't love me enough!” and absolutely no one has even half a fuck to give about everything he has suffered...? Every abuse that is driving him and forged him...?

He could have been such a layered character. I'm not even talking redemption wise, to use the abuse to make him A Good Boi, but he could have been such an interesting villain, there could have been so much to him. This is stupid and sad.

But I am chocking on my laughter at the Seelie Queen literally teaching him WHAT HE COULDA BEEN TAUGHT FROM THE GET GO. To channel his powers. Granted, she channels them into killing Shadowhunters. But they could have been channeled into killing demons.

With the right parent, the right training, without living in hell and being tortured, he could have been an exceptional Shadowhunter. But let's pretend that he is Truly Inherently Evil only because of his demon blood and hey it's legit because he wants to bang his sister so who cares about this guy LOL.

HOLY SHIT THEY REALLY MADE CLARY MURDER HIM WITH A HUG. What a fucking way to go. I don't... I don't even know what to say to that to be honest.

On Clary:

WHAT THE FUCK HAS SHE DONE??

“How do I come back after everything I've done”. What. What line is that. That's the line they could have given Jace in the first episode of 3B. You know, the guy who saw his own body commit 30+ murders, among them the murder of his own grandmother.

What... What's that everything Clary has done? Dress hotter than usual? Go to a rave? Try some Seelie drugs? Sure she killed Lenaia, but that was also a chick she didn't even know and so far she's not been very traumatized by like – killing her own biological father (seriously, the writers never bothered to give her a genuine reaction to that). Way to be overdramatic, writers.

Shitty Ex Machina Rune's existence aside; WHY does the Ex Machina Rune work?? RUNES DON'T WORK ON DOWNWORLDERS. That was like a whole thing in season 1. They kill mundies and they don't work on Downworlders?? Why the fuck is Clary allowed to play – not just an angel but an actual god at this point.

(But y'all know I am going to use this shitty dumb stupid rune in so many fanfiction.)

...But like holy shit. It is so callous to have her say that she wouldn't trade the Shadow World for anything and that “and I met Jace” like he brought all light into her life when the Shadow World killed her mother. Have the writers just completely forgotten that a month ago she lost her mother, her only biological family left?? Ah but it's totally fine because she has Jace now!!! And even though we literally started the episode off with her being devastated and wondering how she will ever come back after everything she has done, they are now only half an hour later already forgetting that she has just gone through major trauma, that she murdered her own father, that she lost her mother? But oh the Shadow World is super awesome, wouldn't wanna trade those past two, utterly traumatizing months for anything!!! Not even for my mom being alive LOL! Just... do the writers even care about the characters? At all?

HOLY FUCKING GODS THEY REMEMBERED JOCELYN. FUCK THIS IS RIDICULOUS ESPECIALLY AFTER HER CONVERSATION WITH SIMON IN EDOM. I am baffled. But I am 100% behind Jocelyn's message because Clary has been a scary motherfucker all this season now with all the things she has done and the rule-breaking. Fuck yeah she shouldn't be allowed to play God, which she DOES at this point.

But like, on a scale of 1 to 10 how dumb did they have to make Clary? Out of all of the ways she could have killed Jonathan, they decided “Nah man she is totally giving up her Shadowhunter self to hug her brother to death” instead of having Miss Stabby-Stab-Stab pull out a dagger and stab him to death? She literallly just got the warning and decides “LOL nope this is how I go out”. What---

There is a huge difference between a character sacrificing themselves for the greater good because there was 100% no other way and a character somehow turning a completely manageable situation into a self-sacrifice that is completely unnecessary... She could have just stabbed him. Or, you know, captured him with a trick instead of murdering. She could have stayed a Shadowhunter without using the Deus Ex Machina runes, living like a normal Shadowhunter. But they really made her go “If I can't play god, I'd rather give up the Shadow World”.

What the fuck even was that “One Year Later”. They literally just wasted a whole year since C/ace reuniting had zero negative effect on her? She didn't combust or anything. They could have literally went after her the day of the wedding, explained amnesia to her and brought her back. But the writers had to be dramatic bitches that put Jace through hell again, huh.

And what exactly did she believe happened? Like, Jocelyn and Luke and Simon?? Basically everyone she ever knew? What did she think happened to them and to herself? She just decided to go back to art school or what? Did they even think about this ending?

Honestly. It'd have been better had they actually Donna Nobled her and said she can never remember and has to be a mundie. But this? This year gap and bullshit and C/ace looking at each other and she suddenly remembers his name because True Love Wins? That makes it even dumber.

On Jace & Meliorn: (I'm trying to give each character their own for the finale, but... I can't separate those two in this case)

THAT STARTLED LITTLE BACKING OFF JACE DOES WHEN MELIORN TAKES IT TO THE BEDROOM. If that wasn't a coming on from Meliorn, I don't know what is. I am definitely living for this little bit of Jeliorn because that was a ship I was sure I'd never get to see proper interactions of. So, small blessings.

Hng. Jace can't lie. How pretty. Seriously his bond with Meliorn is like the saving grace from all of this. And how much fun Meliorn is having with this. Oh my gods my shipper heart is soaring.

SERIOUSLY I AM LIVING FOR THIS. “A serious question. How handsome do you think I am?” WHY WOULD YOU EVEN ASK THAT. Because you want to let my shipper-heart beat some. Thank you, Meliorn, personally, for my life. (Not to mention the answer. A NINE?? Jace. You so pansexual and into handsome Downworlders. It's canon now and I am blessed.)

I'm just absolutely living for Jace getting to interact with a non-Clary and a non-Alec (especially since all of his Alec-interactions this half-season have only been about Ma/ec...). It's... so refreshing to see them use Jace as... a character... instead of a prop. Even if he's played as a comic relief, I am taking so much more from this.

(ALSO: Jimon sparring! Jimon sparring and JACE BOOPING SIMON'S NOSE WHAT THE FUCK.)

On Alec:

What's with Maryse telling him to “take time to mourn”? What the fuck is that? XD He has literally been in Edom and gone back too. There's always been ways in and out. You're sure fast to bury him.

But also, maybe Alec should focus on the way to bring Magnus back instead of planning this fucking stupid wedding. You'd need your groom first.

Tonight. They're literally... I am weeping at how stupid this is. They got engaged yesterday and are getting married today. I had... actual, dumb hopes that the wedding would happen after a time skip. But I forgot this show doesn't know what time is. Ahahaha. Hilarious.

But holy shit am I angry about him being all dodgy and asking Maryse's permission to invite his own father to his wedding. Like. I am very rationally angry about the fact that all the kids sided with their abusive mother over their father, but that they are really all just treating him like that now is insane. Sure, he cheated on their mother, but he is still their father?? He has still been their father and he has been the good parent. If you can forgive Maryse's abuse just like that, how do you hold Robert cheating on Maryse over him like that? This is absolutely insane. What kind of priorities do those writers have to fuck it up this badly? Like the “oh no dad cheated on you let us all comfort you and totally forget the shitty way you have been treating your children!!!” wasn't bad enough on its own, but that they are completely acting like Robert was not just the cheating husband but somehow also the bad parent now? If this is where the show wanted to end it, they should have from the get-go also written him as the bad parent and her as the good parent, then I'd understand this, I'd understand the taking sides thing, the way they all completely turned away from Robert, the way Maryse blossomed and turned into an entirely different character. That ALL would make sense IF they hadn't decided in the first season and in 2B to write Robert as the warm rather and Maryse as the cold and abusive mother. The starting points and end points don't match.

On Magnus:

Magnus. On that throne. In that light. Now that's a look, to be honest.

Also, awkward conversations with the stepmother are very amusing. :D” (But, honestly, Anna and Harry playing off each other is really great. They play the power-dynamic really fascinating.)

Magnus being like “Well no need to close the door if we burn down the place right?” is a mood. It's so stupid and ridiculous, but like it's right. XD”

I'm glad Magnus at least said thank you to Lorenzo and even invited him to the wedding.

I genuinely don't know how to react to “High Warlock of Alicante” to be honest. Like. I don'T know what to say to that.

On Maia:

...I'd like to live in the alternate reality where Maia was more than just her relationships to boys. I'm still let down by the fact that the one (1) badass shot she got in the trailer was literally her walking away from Jordan's funeral fire, with her other ex and her future boyfriend flanking her from either side. If that doesn't summarize this show, I don't know what does.

And while I admire her decision to reconnect with her parents, it also seems rather messed up considering she literally just decided to be The Alpha. So let's leave the pack that has suffered so many recent losses... all alone. That's... not exactly Alpha behavior, even if it is the right thing for her as an individual at that point.

I mean like yeah sure she came back to become an Alpha, but still it's—a weird choice.

BAT BAT EXISTS BAT IS THERE I LOVE BAT HE GOT TO SPEAK. I am so so salty that he didn't get developed properly, that his relationship with Maia didn't get fully fleshed out.

On Isabelle & Simon:

Isabelle as the Human Torch is sure a very nice visual, to be honest.

(ALSO HELEN! HELEN! HELEN! I am 200% sure I can ship Aline/Helen/Isabelle in peace now. Don't @ me.) Though explain to me why Helen doesn't get the fuck away from Isabelle ASAP after realizing that Downworlders turn Isabelle into basically a bomb? I mean, she is half-Seelie.

...and can everyone maybe focus on “Izzy now catches fire when she is touching Downworlders” instead of “SHE WAS KISSING SIMON!!!”...? Like, priorities, dudes?

And how did she conclude “I explore when I touch demon blood. I should totally go to Edom! The place where demons live!”... and act like that should totally “”shield”” her from the atmosphere? What... logic goes into that? I'm serious, someone explain to me why “I explode when I come in contact with demonic stuff” leads to “but I'ma be extra safe in hell where all demonic things live and the very atmosphere should be demonic!!!”...

And Simon and Isabelle... kiss once... like... literally once and the next time they get a moment of being shown alone they literally already fucked. This show... knows that... you can actually go on dates and have a relationship with... oh no never mind this show has never heard the word “pacing” before I forgot sorry LOL

On Luke:

...But like why did his runes return though. I mean, getting turned into a Downworlder like... burned the runes away. They were gone. Why would him no longer being a Downworlder also immediately reapply all of his runes.

I don't know if I really like this, to be quite honest. I don't feel like we know enough about Luke for me to know what to feel about this? Like, he said he didn't want to be alpha and he's been turned against his will sure, but he's been a wolf for like 20 years now. It's... I don't know what to feel on this. Like, he seems really happy about this, but it also feels incredibly cheap due to the show never actually focusing on his thoughts and feelings??

Okay no now that I'm through with it I actually actively hate it. He should have become mundie. Erase it all. Let him live a mundie life with Clary.

On Lorenzo:

I love how Lorenzo brings up the Downworld Council. SOMETHING I HAVE BEEN WONDERING ABOUT TOO. What the fuck happened to that. But nope, SoRrY Lorenzo you are just here to save Magnus. Again. (Others too, but still. It's once again for selfish reasons of helping the Shadowhunters with shit.)

I really like where they took his character. I thought he was just going to be a shallow prop to take Magnus down. Petty and empty. But that they actually give him growth and personality and a personal goal and that they also made him rekindle with Magnus after admitting what he truly wants? That was... actually good. That was more than I ever expected from those writers. Huh.

ALSO FUCK ME I AM 100% BEHIND LORENZO/UNDERHILL.

On Max:

MAAAAX!!! MAX WITH GLASSES! MAX BEING PRECIOUS! He is literally the only thing about episode 22 that I liked. Like that entire final episode was a fucking shit-show.

On Raphael:

Honestly at this point just fuck this show. It is his father’s wedding and he is a mundane. But let’s just have him interact with his ex and her new guy so he can give them his blessing instead of having him actually interact with Magnus.

[bookmawkish]

Some bits of writing

I’m having real problems with finishing even short chapters at the moment, unfortunately. My brain’s all over the place and I need to sort it out. in the meantime, have some bits and pieces of what’s going on in my development folder right now. Any feedback or votes for continuation welcome, I need the motivation. 

Just a patient (bit of Chapter 7)

If pressed (and you’d have to be pressed - talking about yourself is not your favourite occupation) you’d always have described yourself as down-to-earth. When the other kids were daring each other to say bloody mary bloody mary, you were staring yourself down in the mirror, learning to meet your own eyes without flinching. When people blessed each other for sneezing or threw salt over their shoulders, you just watched, marvelling at the superstition and the inherent gullibility of humanity. You’re not at all religious, and there’s a reason for that. To you, religion has always been the largest branch of superstition: the biggest Bloody Mary game of all.

The fact that you seem to have fallen into the arms of a god in some kind of metaphysical star-studded hinterland infuriates you almost beyond measure. How dare this be happening. How dare you be in this - this non-place outside your known reality, where your body seems both there and not there in a baffling and enraging duplicity.

And particularly, how dare Loki be staring down at you in a supercilious manner that you just know has to be as fake as the whirling constellations that seem to surround you both. For some reason you’re currently unclear on, you’re absolutely certain that he has no more fucking idea what’s happening than you have.

Drunk (rambling continuation of previous piece)

It’s fairly dark inside, but Chase can see, by the street lights coming in through the room’s single window, a hunched figure sat on a table. He breathes out, trying to prepare himself, gives Ivan a glance for reassurance, then says, in as normal a voice as he can manage: “Hey, Heckyl.”

“Go away,” Heckyl responds, immediately. His voice is low and growling, and he sounds very irritable. Everything Chase was worried about, to be honest.

“Nope,” he says. “Sorry. You’re stuck with me.”

Heckyl turns slightly, raises a hand, and Chase sees the tell-tale glow of blue light beginning to gather. Ivan grabs his arm, pulls him aside, but the action proves unnecessary. Heckyl’s lightning, when it comes, goes wildly off course and misses Chase by a very wide margin. Of course - drunk. Heckyl has about as much co-ordination as a three-day-old kitten.

It takes Heckyl a moment or two to realise he’s missed his target, and when he does he grumbles loudly, but doesn’t show any inclination towards taking another shot. Instead his attention seems to have been caught by his own boots, which he starts trying to unlace. Chase and Ivan exchange a look, then risk coming a few steps closer, peering around their erstwhile enemy’s shoulder in the dim light.  

Anger management (vent fic)

“Well I guess we have to know where we stand with him. For sure,” says Tyler, and they nod at each other decisively before standing up together.

Heckyl is less than six feet away from them, half-crouched, power gathered in his palms ready to throw. His face is twisted into a furious snarl, and at the sight of them he actually growls, an utterly inhuman, barely sentient sound.

Tyler holds his hands up, palms flat, in a placatory gesture. Ivan at his side stands in as relaxed a position as possible in an attempt to look non-threatening.

“Heckyl, wait, please,” Tyler says, trying to strike a balance between being loud enough to get through to the man and calm enough not to set him off. “Can we - look, I just wanna talk to you -”

They throw themselves flat again just in time, as Heckyl attacks with a roar.

“Yeah, he’s crazy,” Tyler gasps, as they pick themselves up slowly.

“Then we must not harm him,” Ivan says, firmly. “He is not himself. It is unfair.”

“Ivan, he’s trying to kill us.”

“He is enraged,” says Ivan, calmly. “I think he would try to kill anything that moved. We are just in the way. No, friend Tyler. We must get through to him, help him before he hurts himself.”

Loki Didn’t Do It (failed prompt piece snippet)

“I didn’t do it,” says Loki, and being that you can practically hear the sound of conclusions being jumped to all around the rest of the room, you feel this was possibly a poor choice on his part. Oh dear. Another day, another death, and yet another opportunity for Loki to take the fall for it.

Loki’s got that look on his face that you recognise (you spend a lot of time looking at him: and that’s nobody’s business but your own) as genuine. He’s guilty a lot. Nobody could deny this.

“Pretty much any time you see Loki, he‘s guilty of something,” Clint once said.

[cicadacreativemag]

I Miss Being a Kid

Casey Forest, Creative Team Member

Sometimes college is the place where we lose it—it not referring to virginity, house keys, parental respect, or mental stability. Hard as it is to admit, I myself have lost it more than once here, despite the fact that I’ve spent a lot of money to become an undergrad and curate it, in hopes of making it marketable. This month we were asked to talk about creative coping, and I’m here to announce that I have been doing no such thing—not in the pandemic, not in the summer, not even at any point in my college career. I have had tunnel vision since maybe Antiquity.

There is an indefinable creative quality that lives its life very gently, very quietly in that back of our heads. It is slippery and shy as an eggshell in cake batter. It’s kind of an asshole: it doesn’t care that you haven’t written in three months or that a residency application deadline is tonight. To get it to clock in, everything must be just right, it has to feel safe; the stars must align, the to-do list must be full (but not too full), the head must be clear. I do not encounter these conditions very often. So it is often absent for me now.

This is the point where being able to define it might be important. I am not talking about happiness, or creativity, or passion, or motivation, or even the want to make something. In my mind, it is something that cohabitated with my brain, happily, until I graduated high school. For me, it was an organic, almost frenzied connection to writing. I would come home from school every day (every! day! it baffles me now) and sit at my dad’s old white computer to write for hours, with no desire to pause or snack or do anything other than write. This is the period in my life that defined me as a writer; even when I stopped being able to do that, I still considered myself one. In retrospect, it was probably still lurking in the back of my head, refusing to surface, waiting for me to forget about it so it could come back, unnoticed, to rekindle something.

This is super specific. I do not expect anyone to be able to relate to it. But for the sake of making someone feel seen, I have compiled a checklist to help us recognize it, since I believe it bops around and manifests itself in different ways; ways which might reassure you that it has not left you, even if you’re having a hard time creating right now; or might remind you of the park you went to as a child; or that might make your eyes glaze over until you hit the end of the list or, god forbid, click back to your Instagram feed.

You will sit down and pick a movie. It will not take you eighty years to do it.

When there were still theaters, you would walk out, sneakers muffled on the carpet, shocked that it was still daytime.

Reading Artist Animal makes you want to swim to the bottom of the ocean, immediately.

Last year, when a friend got up from the café table to refill their coffee, you doodled something on the back of the dirty napkin. It was a poem or a honeybee or an exceptionally straight line. You felt the need to put it in your pocket, and now it lives in some drawer somewhere, and if you went to find it right now you would feel alarmed at how brutally honest it is.

Your Pinterest boards are clustered. You cling to Mori Kei skirts or Swedish interior decorating until you don’t.

You could not separate the fire from the heat, even if you tried.

While you’re falling asleep, while your mind is doing whatever minds do in the forty minutes it takes you to start dreaming, you could be jolted back awake by remembering you haven’t wished your uncle a happy Friday, even though it is Tuesday and you haven’t spoken to him since he tagged you in a post about nephews he found on the Cows are Angels in Disguise Facebook page.

Clearly, what I’m rambling on about is a sense of presence that precedes an ability to create. Personally, I do not think higher education (or pandemics, or unruly elections, or natural disasters) is all that conducive to the kind of presence that offers a place for the spontaneous content that is easiest to make. Understand that I am not saying it is impossible to make something non-academic without it; I am merely trying to articulate something that’s been bothering me since my daily word count became my monthly word count.

In our present moment, which is terrible, we need every support we can get to create something external. My fiction workshop professor would implore you to write (or draw, or needle-felt, whatever) what needs to be written (drawn, felted, whatever), especially now; to offer that space to someone else who might need it, or even to offer it to yourself.

But trying to create right now is really hard. It is really hard to sit down and stare at a blank page and remember how easy it used to be. It’s hard to come to terms with the fact that all your creating goes into files for school which you might not ever look at again, that you’ve run out of energy, that everyone is telling you how important it is to keep making in a time when the most organic parts of us are hibernating. It’s hard to pivot an entire identity on creation and exist in a time where it’s impossible to process what’s going on, and more impossible still to face the guilt of distracting yourself.

I’m only here to tell you that coping looks very different depending on the day, the hour. Sometimes it’s great to force out something creative and be proud that you can, even with the absence of it; sometimes all we can do is browse the Documentary section on Netflix unfeelingly and be a little inspired but mostly jealous that someone created such a pretty film in a time like this. I’m also here to remind you to look for it; to not be upset that it might be hiding again; to console it, and console yourself. It is not gone; it couldn’t possibly be, it loves you too much; and if you can’t create right now, okay, then maybe you have the time to roll out a welcome mat and dust the curtains should it decide to tiptoe back some morning soon.