#homegirl had goals

[demigods-posts]

can we please discuss how percy asks annabeth to kiss him in tlo? and then annabeth tells him that she'll consider it if he survives the war? and then she proceeds to fight to keep him alive? to the point of taking a poison knife in the arm to protect him? and then she goes to find him after the war? and intiates the kiss? homegirl had goals.

[monetilly]

"Who the fuck are you?" "Who the fuck are you?" "I asked you first." "And I asked you second."

A chapter one meme recap for Would That I.

[4milly]

Hi baby! I loveee your writing! I saw you asked for ideas. Can you do inexperienced reader and Roman teaching her how to take the d?

nice & slow — r.r +millytober+

parings: roman reigns x early 20s black!reader

kink: inexperienced kink. (?)

—

warnings: p in v, unprotected sex, inexperienced ≠ virgin, crying, roman being gentle, pet names (18+ MDNI)

“you ready, baby girl?”

your body shuddered under him. your hands clasped together above your head, making sure he had full view of your face— currently filled with fear.

you weren’t the most experienced with sex. with only two previous sexual partners ruining it for everyone. only fucking until they got theirs and leaving you empty handed. you thought, if this is what sex was? you wanted no parts. you wanted to feel good too, and when roman learned your wish, he made it his goal to show you.

you were in your early 20s and the man being near 40; he was so much more experienced than you knew. he’d fuck plenty of pussy before, had numerous adventures with them, even flew a few out for a good time with their homegirls.

but none met more to him right now than you.

“i—i’m nervous, ro.” you squeaked out in a small voice staring into his eyes, adorned with passion “i know it’ll feel good, but you’re just so b—“

“we’re gonna go real gentle, with you alright? you gotta stay with me. m’kay, baby girl?”

you nodded, as he rubbed his dick through your crying folds. the fat mushroomed tip rubbing against your clit. you jolt at the contact and let out a small moan. roman, by any chance wasn’t small—his long, thick, dick splitting your opening wide instantly. he grunted and continued to push; you clamped down onto him as tears prickled your eyes. luckily, he stops once he’s halfway inside, allowing you to prepare yourself for the rest of the length.

he leaned down to kiss away your tears, “lift your legs around my waist, there you go…good girl. open up for me.”

he grunted and pushed through, stretching you open bit by bit; making you gasp at each sudden movement. he wiggled his hips around, helping you get used to his size and pressing further into you. his tip inches away from bottoming out.

“look at you, baby. so fuckin’ pretty & perfect. you can take it, can’t you? my baby can take it.”

he whispered into your ear, before taking the lobe into his mouth. he began to slowly fuck into you. your pussy tightly clamping around his dick and leaking onto the bed sheets. roman could feel your pussy start to mold to his dick, almost like a blanket tightly wrapped around a body.

you let out a whine as you locked your legs around his lower back to signal him that you were ready for more. tears formed in your eyes for a different reason now.

“fuckk, ro—please, fuck me.” you whimpered out thrusting your hips to completely impale yourself onto his dick.

he let out a laugh before letting go of your hands and moving them under your ass to pull your lower body closer, “don’t hold your breath, hike your knees up a bit…push your hips towards mines.” he coached your every move, determined to make this everything you wanted.

his pace quicken, his dick pumping you full force causing your boobs to bounce. his eyes firmly planted on them, before taking one in his mouth.

he pressed his dick deeper inside you, as he felt himself twitch as you fluttered around him. your pussy was warm; it felt like heaven to be inside of. he was nearly losing his mind at the sight of your fucked out face looking at him with such satisfaction. the more he coached you through the experience, the more he wanted to see how far he could go.

you trusted him with your pleasure, a gift he’d treasure forever.

“ughn! right there, please don’t stop, roman! ohh god!” you moaned out into his ear, the sound of your toes popping sounding like firecrackers in the room

“you feel so fuckin’ good, baby. i love this pussy. i’m not stopping till you cum on it. my girl wanna cum? hm?”

unable to form another sentence, you just nodded turning your head into the pillow and feeding it your loud moans, as he roughly fucked. the bed began to hardly knock against the wall as his thrust becoming deeper and harder; the bed springs squeaking beneath you.

you slipped your hand between your bodies to rub at your clit harshly, and it only takes a few touches to have you cumming around him. your ear immediately going deaf at the force from it and your eyes rolling into your head. you squeezed his dick, causing him to growl and your loud cries to fill the room.

“let it out, sweetheart. you did so good, for me. bring your knees to your chest baby, atta girl.” you bring your legs firmly together raising them to your chest, “good girl…keep cummin’ for me, pretty girl. get it all out. that feel good?”

his hips snapped against your ass to chase his own orgasm. with a few more sharp thrust his cum shot out in thick pools into you.

“r—roman. i feel like im gonna p—“ you hiccuped as the sensation triggered you to squirt over his dick, bringing you to your 2nd orgasm of the night.

the sight was mesmerizing; his chest harshly heaving up and down, his head thrown back, and his dick plugging his cum into you making sure nothing spills out.

“you did so good, baby girl. c’mere.” he spread your legs apart leaning down to embrace you into a bear hug and rain kisses across your face

you slipped your tongue into his mouth, hoping you convey how grateful you are for him.

🏷️: @msbigredmachine @harmshake @cyberdejos2 @caramelcleopatraa @angiedawn02 @amandairene88 @queeny23

if you’d like to be tagged in future writings, comment below.

make sure to reblog, comment, and follow! <3

[mahtharula]

✧･ﾟ— nailtech!connie headcanons

starring: nail tech!connie x black!fem!reader wc: 627 cw: purely fluff 🫶🏾

nailtech!connie was the tech all of the girls wanted to book with. yeah, he knew how to get your hands right, but everyone wanted to book simply to get a closer look of the man. from his dyed buzz cut head that always had a different design every time you came into the shop, to his tall, to the tattoos that decorated his arms and hands perfectly and his eyes. oh his hazel eyes is what gets them.. but most importantly, his nails! 

nailtech!connie is both a great listener and conversationalist! Honestly, he should add being a therapist to his qualifications because the amount of advice he has given his clients is insane. most of the time, they complain about their man and his line is, “you too pretty to be dealing with that.” (which have the girls swooning out of their minds).

nailtech!connie who definitely plays music during his appointments. of course, he caters to his clients preference of music and rocks from there, but baby if you give him the aux you will be far from disappointed. his music is so diverse, it ranges from partynextdoor to bossa nova, depending on his mood. his main goal is to make the client comfortable, so when booking with him he has a section where he asks if you want a talkative or silent session.

nailtech!connie who learned to do nails after watching his aunt  do it for some time. at first, he only learned to expand his creativity as an artist since he dabbled in many mediums, but once he got the hang of it he was hooked. as he continued  perfecting the craft  and posting his work, two  years and a half later he had enough money to rent out a studio and widen his client intake.

nailtech!connie because of the overwhelming number of clients who began booking with him since the opening, trying to squeeze in new clients was a tricky task. most times, connie would be booked for weeks making it hard to even get a taste of his talent on your nails. so when his homegirl was begging for him to do her best friend's nails, all he had to say was that she was lucky one of his regulars canceled. 

nailtech!connie was absolutely floored when you walked into his studio. of course, he catered to many women due to his career, but something about you just had him stuck. from your smooth, dark skin to your locs that ended at the middle of your back, your plump lips that revealed a pearly white, gem decorated smile. you were like a dream personified. As you were explaining your vision for your nails to connie, he was trying his very best to focus but your scent of shea butter and florals was distracting him, “you paying attention, con?” “huh? yeah, yeah, i am!”

nailtech!connie trying to learn everything about you. from your favorite foods to what you do as a career, all of it. when he found out you were a rapper, he only wanted to go harder pulling out some exclusive charms he was saving. something he did love was how despite giving him an idea of what you wanted, you basically gave him freedom to present your idea into his vision, which he absolutely loved.

nailtech!connie who kept refusing to take the full payment and insisted on giving you a discount (because he can). after a few times, you finally convinced him to take the payment, but asked if you could become a regular because his work was so good. it only took a flutter of your lashed extensions for the man to fold,  but he only had one rule: don’t cheat on him.

✧･ﾟ— author’s note • hey y’all!! i hope this was good, i’m super proud of it but please give me feedback 🙏🏾. do y’all want more nailtech!connie? do ya’ll want more connie & y/n 😗? let me know and i appreciate y’all, until next time 🖤

tags : @yourrfavzxri , @theemrsjaeger , @hqkalon , @1h3artm3

[incorrectsibunaquotes]

Senkhara was the worst bad guy ever not because she was a bad villain, but she was just really bad at her villainy. She had one goal: get these kids to get her the mask by any means necessary. And every time they slightly badmouthed her, she was like “That’s it, you’re all dying” like she didn’t need them??? Homegirl would not stop shooting herself in the foot

[pruneunfair]

Ranking OI maids.

23: Dobiella (The villainess maker)

The 20 people in the villainess maker fanbase have already agreed this girl is literally just Dobby as a anime girl from the way she speaks to the fact that their names sound similar. Most maids in OI tend to follow 2 personality traits: either they devoted to the point of nearly being husks or they are mean bullies who pick on their boss. Dobiella though... she takes that to a whole new level, girly isn't even a person she literally needs a purpose to live, even Ayla is creeper out by it, That hairstyle she has is wack too.

22: Lina (the tyrants perfumer)

Similar to Dobiella except it's not to such a concerning degree. She's a decent character but the bar is already quite low given how the characters are simple in TTOP.

21: Ellie (50 tea recipes of the Duchess)

Her design is cute I won't lie, braids and glasses are a classic ill always be a sucker for. But again, she's really not much other than a shy follower to Chloe ready to defend her. Won't change the fact she's still my favorite character in 50 tea recipes of the Duchess.

20: Ruby's maid (how to get my husband on my side)

I honestly cannot remember her name 😞 I can't remember which chapter she debuts in so I kinda just gave up on looking. anyway when it comes to personality she's still a tad dull but she's still got more than the last 3. The design is pretty meh but I can't fault her too much, she was pretty nice for all the times I remember her on screen.

19: Emily (actually I was the real one)

on one she really annoys me for some reason, probably cause she comes across as a real suck up but on the other hand, I can understand her desires for fancy clothes and materials.

18: Mina (Actually I was the real one)

Cosettes maid she had for like.. 5 chapters. I know a lot of people hate her for talking smack about Keira and not being grateful enough but the girl was also a homeless woman with her little brother. Cosette used Mina as a tool for her goals and let her get deported when everything went wrong during the rite arc. Remember the main reason Mina did what she did was because Cosette was using her brother's comfort and safety as leverage.

17: Annie (The villainess turns the hourglass)

Again, can't blame a maid for wanting a little more in life, with that being said it feels a tad weird whenever she acts like a pet whenever Aria offers her gold. Don't really like the fact that she also covered up Annie's freckles, let the Freckles be seen! 😤

16: Urania (From maid to queen)

Her rank might go up or down in the future since I've just started reading maid to queen but I liked the idea of a protagonist who could actually be selfish instead of perfectly kind or badass. Urania gets way too much hate so far in my opinion because she's actually more realistic and the only thing I'm concerned about is that she might become too stupid in her goal to return as a concubine since it's how she died in the first timeline.

15: Rose (Actually I was the real one)

The most iconic it Keiras maids. I preferred her first appearances more but for a maid with another personality dedicated to Keira but she's not as annoying as Emily and shows up more often than Mina. I do like her but there are better ones.

14: Emma (the villainess turns the hourglass)

out of all the evil maids Emma was one of the first who at least did it in a way that wasn't just tampering with food. She was a noble who lost her wealth and suffered a miscarriage so it did explain why a maid would be classist and raise Mielle with a superiority complex. Not bad for a side villain.

13: Anna (Not your typical reincarnation story)

I didn't really care about out her at first, she had a lot of Kuu dere traits and for a while she felt like a robot, thankfully she develops little by little as time went on and I love her for it.

12: Jessie (the villainess turns the hourglass)

Homegirl was just trying to do her job and I love her for it. After what Aria put her through in the first timeline she deserves that extra compensation.

11: The head maid (How to get my husband on my side)

Does this woman even have a name? 💀 I may have said braids+glasses were one of my favorite designs for maids but it's only 2nd to the experienced and almost muscular like designs. Beyond that her personality legit makes sense. She is universally hated for not accepting Ruby and while i do think attacking her for no reason is stupid it makes sense that's she not gonna immediately trust a stranger when she has people like Ellen to take care of. Speaking of that the relationship Ellen had with the head maid for as little of it that is seen is still very wholesome. We love our older ladies.

10: Emily..again (Death is the only ending for the villainess)

Probably the most iconic of OI maids and of course I like Emily but I do wish she had a little more to do with the plot, not bad but there are better ones.

9: Granna (Handmade tales of the handmaid)

Another maid protagonist but her concept is actually unique, a old woman who passed away of natural causes unexpectedly transmigrated as a 15 year old maid and with her experience cleans the mansion she works for with ease. The story is so far amazing and Granna mentally being an old woman instead of a ordinary office worker gets her extra points.

8: Lilian (who made me a princess)

Give this woman a raise Claude! That woman did so much for Athy I still consider her the one true parent to the kid.

7: Delice (Remarried empress)

Delice may only be remembered for being mutilated by Rashta but she still holds a special place in my heart. I felt so bad for her when her brother just told her nothing was wrong when Rashta was growing unstable and next thing you know during her next shift she gets framed and tortured ����. Rashta I love you but not cool girl! In another universe Delice got to be spared and run away to start a little flower garden or a toy store with her dream husband.

6: Sancha (Sister I will be the queen in this life)

This little cutie deserves more than what she got. Don't get me wrong the story treats her pretty well when it comes to her new life and Ariande as a friend but at the same time.. I kinda think she exists to be the token homeless girl for Ariande to bring in to look better, she doesn't do much outside of cheer her lady on and I don't really care for her love interest that much. However I have noticed that Sancha is usually at her best when she's away from Ariande meaning she does more then be a cheerleader. Her moments of refusing to forgive Malleta were her best moments for her character. Speaking of which..

5: Malleta (Sister I will be the queen in this life)

one of my most favorite problematic queens though that's not saying much considering most of my favorite characters are toxic women. First of all: the character design, Sancha looks cute and all but she has the same super cute petite and youthful look most OI maids have. I know it's just because SITQITL puts non conventionally attractive characters as villains with exception of Ceasre and Isabella but I still love that Malleta stands out with a plus sized body, freckles, and narrow eyes instead of doe eyes. Her personality while admittedly trashy is still so entertaining given how delulu she can be. Personally I wish there were scenes where she and Isabella would just be gossip girls and talk shit about all Isabellas enemies. God why did she have to die so soon 😔

4: Chuchu (isn't being a maid better than being a princess?)

Pay no attention to the fact that she shares a name with a LOZ monster. Like I said my favorite kinds of maids are the muscular types who could carry a an entire table which is why Chuchu is one the greats. She's a total gentle giant and I'm so glad the series didn't kick her out completely when the FL moved on.

3: Helena (kill the villainess)

Im gonna throw hands with Helena haters cause what did she even do!? She made mistakes and was willing to apologize and make up for them and that still wasn't enough. Istg internalized misogyny did her dirty I tell you. As the 2nd FL I'm glad the author treated her with respect and actually brought up that Helena has feelings too just like Eris. What I loved the most about her was how she realistically handled the usual evil maid when some random maid put sand in Eris's dessert. When Eris slapped her Helena stood up for what was right and told Eris there was no reason to abuse someone else when they could easily just be fired. 👏 thank you Helena, thank you for finally doing what was sensible by firing the maid instead.

2nd: Sienna (isn't being a maid better than being a princess)

It was really hard to decide between Helena and Sienna so even though Sienna is up higher they are actually tied. Just gonna say it, out of all the FL's she beats all of them in terms of character design because that braid combined with green is perfect. The manhwa she's from is pretty short but it's still really wholesome albeit with a few cliches and random sad flashbacks.

1st: Bridgette. (This isekai maid is forming a union)

Reddit can complain about isekai maid villainizing nobles too much but I won't care because Bridgette, like Helena, IS a maid and naturally would be against workplace abuse. It's funny how quick they'll be about complaining that the nobles are one note because they don't have justifiable reasons to slap a maid while they don't bat an eye at the numerous counts of villainized maids in OI beforehand. Back to the point though Bridgette is one of the most complex protagonists I've ever seen. She can be mean, she can be kind, she can rash and she can still be resilient. That's what makes her so relatable she's not a single personality teathered to a ball and chain. Not only that but it's her and the entire story that made me feel comforted knowing I wasn't the only one turned off by the iffy tropes in OI being supported.

These tropes are all shown through flashbacks of Bridgettes past lives and I have to point out how much they still feel so unique even if they are the same soul, each of them making me cry one way or another. (Fawn and Muriel, my babies! 😭)

[gaymars97]

Holy shit i just remembered i never introduced tumblr to Betrayal au im gonna change that

So basically, in betrayal au, Maya doesn’t meet the raiders till much later. Before that happens, she also experiences way more betrayal trauma, assassination/murder attempts and overall discrimination than in canon. In fact, pretty much all she lived from interactions with other people ended up being negative, or at best, neutral, either on the short or long run.

So naturally, instead of being open to form new relationships, she starts to distance herself from others. (Cauz yk. Who would want to try to socialize again after over 27 years of perpetual negativity from people? You try keeping your cool after that) By the time she finally meets the raiders, things are different than in canon…

That was the short version. Long version is under the cut

(I shall post a part 2 on bl3 BAU cauz theres a few important things to say about her and if i cram it in here the post will just be. Interminable.)

When she gets on Pandora, instead of directly joining the raiders, Maya is instead approached by a different group of so called « vault hunters » who offer her to work together to open the vault.

As time passes and she gets to know her teammates, even though the betrayal from the order of the impending storm still deeply affects her emotionally, she learns to trust and care for those new friends.

(For reference, the impending storm plot twist™️ also happens earlier, so she also gets to pandora sooner)

Well surprise! Turns out this was a trap too! The « vh » team lured her into trusting them so they could get their hands on a siren, after all. Plan devised by a commander in Hyperion, fyi.

In an act of self defense, she had to kill the very people she thought she could trust. Once again, it wasn’t her who was welcomed with open arms in a family. This whole time, all they cared about were her powers.

Now, this had happened twice, and this time, she nearly died. A part of her did die that day.

Every time she trusted people, it was used against her.

And how about the strangers she had met so far, well, in her life? Either avoided her, visibly feared her or tried to kill her. At best, they just went on to live their day.

So, she started to believe that maybe she was doomed to be left behind every time she tried to follow others. To get hurt every time she showed vulnerability. To be hunted. Feared. Hated.

And can you blame her?

I mean, after all, when was the last time people genuinely cared about her?

…

Did that ever happen in the first place?

So, as Pandora just seems to keep proving her fears are justified, she learns to become distant.

After making the same mistake twice, she wasn’t going to let people deceive her again. Now she knew that if she wanted to reach her goal to learn about sirens, it wasn’t by entrusting others with her help.

At some point, the crimson raiders offer to team up. But she won’t let her guard down so easily now. She refuses. I mean, what’s stopping them to just take all the info they need from her hands once they don’t need her help anymore?

So, led by nothing but bits of info and a mysterious voice in her head (As much as she’s real hesitant to follow the advice of the so called « ai » talking to her somehow, she’s the best lead she’s got.), she leads a one woman hunt for the vault key.

But things don’t go exactly as planned (as always). The moment she’s finally close to get the thing, guess who shows up? That’s right! The crimson fucking raiders, and they want the key too!

Lilith confronts her. She gives her another chance to work together, but Maya just can’t take that kind of risk a third time. So, siren fight ensues, and things seem to be going well, until Lilith decides enough is enough and uses eridium. However, instead of killing the fellow siren, she knocks her out and gets her to sanctuary.

Held captive by the raiders (You can thank Lilith for that btw. Homegirl can’t get herself to kill a fellow siren just yet) a deal is eventually made (working with other people may be the last thing she’d do under normal circumstances, but she has no choice. They caught her.)

So against her own will, she learns to know the people she works with, thinking that after the key is acquired, she’s just get the info she needs and then fuck off. But once again. Didn’t go as planned. These guys are way more loveable than expected-

Goddamn it.

She has one hell of a crisis when she realizes that not only she’s feeling herself starting to care about those people, but that this odd feeling she has whenever she’s with the odd one who screams about meat might be romantic attraction. (And it is)

It takes time, but the raiders eventually prove to her that this time, it’s mutual. Things get better after that 💜

(She’s still more of a bastard than canon tho. All this time of the intimidating distant facade taught her how nice it feels to be a lil mean. As a treat)

Another noticeable trait is the massive scar she has on her face. It was inflicted by one of the members of the fake vh team the day of the betrayal (it still brings a load of bad memories and she hates it) I shall post how the scar looks pretty soon.

(Other note, i would like to thank @rando-lesbo210 because her Fallen Heirs au is what inspired the creation of Betrayal au)

[ria-the-camel]

gotta write down my act 3/ season 2 thoughts while they’re still warm (watched act 3 then slept on it)

okay so.

first things first, Isha. I deeply dislike her character. I can’t really dislike her because homegirl barley has exists as anything other than a plot device

the minute she was introduced she felt like some plot device (plus i don’t like her character design at all), then she started following jinx around and yeah. I knew exactly how she was gonna get used, by dying to break jinx even more.

the main issue have with her is that with sooooo much stuff going on in the show, they didn’t really have time to grow her as a character I could care about, other than Jinx’s little buddy, so it really had no impact, I barely accepted that Jinx cared for her at that point.

And it’s very disappointing when you see a character and all you can think is “oh yeah, that’s a tool that theyll use later” instead of a character I could actually grow attached to.

Plus! she’s entirely irrelevant to act 3, straight up barely mentioned! I personally think they didn’t really need her, I think they could have done something great with just Jinx and Sevika and the rest of the Undercity using her as a symbol. the pieces were there but it didn’t really feel like they delivered.

And in general, I think the biggest gripe I have with season 2 is how unsatisfying their handling of the whole Piltover vs Zaun thing was. That was the main issue in season 1 (along with Vi/Powder, but I’ll get there) and here it took such a background spot. Ngl, it felt bad! the final battle being “there’s a common enemy so let’s put aside our differences and fight these sexy zombie-robots!” was sooooo disappointing. What the fuck??? that was the whole point of the story! Zaun is still oppressed!! oh weaaaow they put sevika in the. council? The right hand man? the brawler? alone in a room filled otherwise with piltover’s rich ass people?

yeah, truly satisfying.

I liked in act 1 how they showed the power vacuum after Silco died, how inadequate the chem barons were, but like, they did not deliver on that storyline either, they let it frizzle out. “sure now theres just a bunch of leaderless gangs, one has blue hair and pronouns”. eh

The other big thing that made me legitimately sad, and i did mention it before, is how dirty they did Cait in act 2. I loved the direction they took her in act 1, dictator Cait,Fascist Cait, after being the fish outta water, the damsel in distress being kidnapped while in the shower, girl got her traumas! The visceral and emotion numbing hatred she had for Jinx was so intresting. she hated her, she feared her, thought everyone was on that same page because she was blinded by her own grief. And she was so so wrong!! and she got manipulated so easily by Ambessa!

And I just wish they’d given her more time to show how that pain and power and relentless hatred eroded at her soul. I had no doubt they would have her go back on her choices (tho a part of me also wanted to see her get dragged so low she couldn’t climb back out. What can I say, I love a tragedy and Cait is one of my favorite characters), get back to Vi, but I wanted it to matter, to really show how fucked up she was.

And it didn’t feel like enough. There were hints of her disagreeing with Ambessa, with her use of power and violence, but never of her changing her goals really, she still seemed to be ready for anything as long as they got Jinx. And then she bumped into Vi and they didn’t show us how they came to that betrayal, only that they did. and uh? I didn’t like it.

In act 3 I liked her a bit more, idk if it’s because i had time to mourn dictator caitlyn and how little of her we actually got to see, or if maybe seeing her and Vi actually talk about how they were still mad placated me a little.

though, fuck me I really disliked the cell sex scene. Not the animation of course! shit was fucking well done, though some shots were so purposely for the camera that they felt kinda like porn, but I mostly laughed at that. No I didn’t like that it was in a jail cell, I didn’t like that it felt kind of outta nowhere? like yeah sure showing them fucking is a good way to hint at them having made up (cos Cait decided Jinx wasn’t so scary after all I guess? Like I can bekieve that, I just wished they’d shown ita bit more, but like I said, I liked it more than act 2), but the timing felt so off, Jinx just ran away to do gods know what, Vi is locked in a prison again, little fucked up?

Also the editing was, uh, a lot. I think of the Jayce/Mel sex scene as one of the best, the music, the cuts with viktor, the was the blood/magic and sex all mixed and crossfaded on screen? Holy shit that scene rules! So this one was… a bit disappointing once again.

(Maybe if season 1 didn’t exist I would have had a better time with s2 as a whole., but it does exist!!!)

anyway I was saying, I feel like a tasteful fade to black would have been better, tho my best choice would have been for them Not To Fuck in that scene, save it for later, or find something that works to make flow it a bit better (that isn’t king princess blasting in the speakers lmao)

I liked the choice to have the sniper lose an eye, girly did some war crimes and the like, a little bit of karma was needed there, plus I love when my faves get scarred forever.

speaking of karma, Maddie. Another. for the “why would they introduce her” pile. first time I saw her, approaching Vi in her drunken pit, it was either she’s a spy or shes gonna die tragically, same “plot device thing” as isha, then she slept with cait and yeah, if she’s not a spy i would have been surprised. what was her purpose tbh? Showing Cait rebounding was eh, didn’t feel that needed but sure alright. she tried to convince her to back out? so that ambessa could fully take over? if that’s the case it wasn’t reaaally clear. why was she there.

I didn’t get why Loris was so prominent at all. Sure use him as a sort of Vander stand in but also. They didn’t really??? It almost felt like they had ideas for a deeper story but they had to cut them for time and all that was left was this discount Vander who would sometimes pop up.

I just don’t feel like we really needed the fascist police squad to have names and relevance tbh, unless they were gonna be given some time, which they weren’t, because there was sooo much shit going on!!!

Now Vi, I have a more difficult time decoding how I feel about her, the line about whatever choice she makes being wrong kind encapsulates her character perfectly tbh. And I love that for her, absolute disaster woman with a heart as big as the sun. I wished they’d given more space to her choice to join the enforcers, explored that conflict more deeply, and also her feelings after the timeskip, but I have to admit I probably was only disappointed because I had seen the teaser of her emo phase in the pit, I feel like i would have enjoyed that sequence more if it hadn’t been shown already! I was thinking there was gonna be more but nope, just jinx showing up about Vander. And that’s again a core aspect of her, she fights Jinx about it for like, two seconds, before giving in. She loves her, she loves Vander, she wants to believe hes there, that their family could finally get back together, as broken and bruised as it is. And yeah I liked ep 5 the most out of that batch, because I did like how they dealt with their family (only gripe was isha, who had no real reason to be there but sure)

I hate her longer hair tho. I get thats its a bit more LoL accurate and that just makes me dislike it even more lmao. in the finale she was kinda there, punching and stuff, good for her. I didn’t reaaaally like her ending though, she lost everything, again, and she just goes to Piltover to live wth her rich cop gf? What about Zaun? Is the “you’re never getting rid of me” meant to say she’s joining the cops again? Cos I know she’s always a cop in LoL, but man, does that Not feel like the right move. All she seems to have left is Cait, is that supposed to mean she’s renounce her identity too? Cos if that’s the case it sucks ngl.

With Jinx, I have mixed feelings aswell. Like I said I wish they hadn’t used Isha. I don’t think she was needed, she’s broken, she’s hopeless, but she still wants to fuck shit up. Give more space to her and Sevika!!! Show her recognizing something of Silco in her!

Idk I need to think on her some more. I enjoyed the shot of her in the cell with her hair loose, got an honest gasp outta me. All she wanted at the end was to stop the bad feelings, save her sister and stop her father from suffering, and I guess she did! We’ll see her again for sure.

Vander/Warwick felt so underutilized, just missing parts of what would have made a great story. He didn’t even get to ball and cause much damage 😔 I wanted him to maim and destroy more shit even before the Viktor switch. I kinda wanted him to really hurt Vi or Jinx or someone they cared about. Tbh the show could have worked if they straight up not had him in it. He would have been perfect if season 2 had continued on the Piltover/Zaun and Vi/Jinx, but it did not, so he just felt like another loose thread flapping about.

Jayce and Victor are the people that in the overarchinseason I liked the most. It became their story, and it shows, even through hiccups and the many many things still going on. I’m unsure as to why Viktor agreed to ally with Ambessa, I probably gotta rewatch a few of his scenes. Was it to get help from Singed? idk.

Loved when Jayce showed up and killed Viktor in 6, and loved his Annihilation jaunt through bad ending Piltover, (ep 7 in general was amazing). I called the mage being Viktor and I liked that Jayce stayed consistent to his character from the very beginning, in that all he really wants is for his partner and him to help people and each other. Love wins! win for the yaoi fans. And I mean that truly, an ending so tragic and impactful, that ruled for them.

Mel… oh Mell… how they butchered you… It makes me so sad. The black rose plot was so egh. Unnecessary, took away time and for what? Mel and Ambessa already had reasons for conflict! no need to throw a new party into the mix. and so she spent most of the season in storage. Sad!

And then, she shows up and gets magic powers? That whole sequence with the magic lady whatever felt like a high value trailer for the new LoL champion!! coming soon to console and pc(tm). Didn’t feel like they let it breathe enough. Oh she got magic now, and people think thats bad for… reasons. That’s never been the point of Arcane, idk if it’s bigger in the game, but again, irrelevant. reminded me of that episode of Adventure Time where a dude who hates dark magic tries to kill Peppermint Butler, but instead Pep just turns all his children into monsters and the children are delighted and the dude just walks away with his monster kids. Which is to say, a bit silly, since in AT monsters and magic are just, everywhere.

I thought her design was still cool as hell, my roommate disliked it, I agree that her season 1 look was better tbh.

But the main thing is that she was so cool because she was just a very smart normal woman! That was amazing in a world filled with freaks who do freak shit! She was a political manipulator, ambitious but cautious, her character was so interesting and prone to mistakes because she was surrounded by freaks! and she was too normal to predict their shenanigans.

I can’t even remember the scene where she reunites with Ambessa rn, how is that possible? It must have been important, c’mon.

I did enjoy Cait and Mel being the ones to fight her together, though the choreography wasn’t too exciting (it felt a bit static with ambessa practically standing still as the girls threw themselves at her, though it did work in showing just how strong Ambessa was), I liked that Cait got at least a little bit of recognition from Ambessa, and got to show her why she was more than a tool.

Heimerdinger fucking exploded, funniest shit I’ve ever seen. He’s also probably still out there somewhere, being tossed around in the multiversus.

Ekko was so good. His only problem was the fact that he was missing for all of act 2. ep 7 like I said was one of the best of the series, Probably my fave of the season, but it was so unrelated to it that it’s difficult to put it on the same plane. I did roll my eyes at him building his time device from LoL, but they did manage to integrate it pretty seamlessly! (unlike the gloves and hammer in s1, but you gotta accept some shit) And it’s forgiven because he blows it up in Viktor’s face almost immediately ahahah

I’m a sucker for alternate realities in stories, the What ifs are always so intresting to me. Also, Vi is dead, is Jayce also dead in this universe? I didn’t catch any hints he is if they showed them.

I’d love to play in that reality a bit more tbh, I might read some fics in it if I find them. Like what’s Cait doing? Is Viktor dead? How did Zaun get to be almost as rich as Piltover just by having Vi be dead? It’s fun!

general thoughts are: wished they’d stayed with the relatively smaller scale of season 1, focused on piltover-Zaun, on Vi-Jinx, on Caitlyn dealing with that shit, made Ambessa stay a secondary villain character, have Mel stay a normal motherfucker dealing with just so much shit, explored the undercity unrest more, Viktor and Jayce could have still had their big confrontation in the last ep cause it worked so well imo!

I am glad I enjoyed the last act a bit more than the second, it means when I do my rewatch I will probably be more optimistic about the stuff that bothered me.

Anyway fascist Cait deserved more screen time committing atrocities RIP to a queen.

[beanfanclub]

that vietnamese keeper CARRIED her team. without her we would’ve had easily like 5 more goals. homegirl was on absolute fire. i hope she’s really proud of her performance. being a keeper on a mid team is so disheartening and difficult so i hope she walks away with her head held high as fuck dude.

[allisluv]

Remember that part 1 of an analysis of Annie and careers with marinas are you satisfied with the help of genius and my honor?? Well, I didn't, until I found the sheet I thought I lost while moving (because homegirl can't express her thoughts on the motherfucking notes app)

I'm sorry for repeating the first part I just can't find it so here's the whole thing or maybe I'm gonna send it in 2 parts idk

"I was pulling out my hair, the day I got the deal, chemically calm, was I meant to feel happy that my life, was just about to change" it's about the reaping day, chemically calm is for her smoking and the change is that she's either gonna die or achieve what she trained for her entire life. "One life pretending to be, the cat who got the cream" she got what she wanted, but unlike the others she couldn't pretend that she was liking it. "And I don't give a damn if you don't believe My problem is my problem that I never am happy It's my problem, it's my problem on how fast I will succeed" she slowly starts to disregard what others say about her going mad and for the pressure her parents had put into her before the games. She is angry that for them being broken from all the pressure put into her means that she's crazy. Because when you add more weight to the rope (like a rope holding things idk) it will break at some point. Shes stopping to believe this, both the career ideology and the her being "crazy" shit. She also doesn't care about their words after she comes back and how they talk about her to others and shell fight for herself. Before she needed more, but now she just wants peace, and shell fight for, even if the battle is against herself.

"Are you satisfied with an avarage life?" This us something more all career and people who didn't join the rebellion, so here my logic might break, even though we both know that there are not enough braincells for logic. The avarage life is being safe, under the wing of the Capitol, and not trying to make a change. Maybe because you're scared that if you do it'll get worse. "Do I need to lie to make my way in life?" The tributes needing to look "sexier", more confident and interesting to gain sponsors. Peetas fear of the Capitol changing him. It can also be changing lie to kill, which is obvious, to make it to the goal you have to kill.

"High achiever don't you see? Baby nothing comes for free they say I'm a control freak driven by a greed to succeed nobody can stop me" Annie fighting so much to succeed that she breaks from the pressure, effort, her victory and her "reward". She "burns" herself, nothing can stop her from succeeding, even her knowing her district partner all too well. In the end, even his death didn't stop her from winning.

"Cause it's my problem if I wanna pack up and run away it's my business if I feel the need to smoke and drink and sway. It's my problem, it's my problem if I feel the need to hide and it's my problem if I have no friends and feel I want to die" It's her problem that she finds escape in cigarettes drugs and sex. It's her problem that she hides after her district partners death and after her victory. It's her problem if she wants to die, nobody cares about the mad girl anyway. She shouldn't be alive right now. All those other kids should be. Finnick shouldn't be concerned with her, she is way too weak and evil and pointless, and now even ugly and out of the shape she had with the training (because everyone knows that you don't deserve or earn sympathy without a pretty face). And with someone helping her she feels even weaker. So she pushes the little people left away and is left alone.

I'm so sorry this is so long and old so it probably doesn't make sense but hey at least I... Don't know ok I'm sorry again

-🎸

nonnie never ever apologise for sending me in these rambles! i love to read them! on that note, this is so beyond perfect that i actually need this injected into my veins. please feel free to send in song requests with a character and we can analyse them together!! <3

[churchyardgrim]

3e ravenloft’s greatest hits: lady edition

ASK AND YE SHALL RECIEVE 

Natalia Vhorishkova

so we know and love the Weathermay-Foxgrove sisters, 5e actually kept them more or less the same, BUT. what 5e neglected to give much detail on was Natalia, and as soon as i read the dread possibilities in Van Richten’s Arsenal i was obsessed. holy shit! fucknasty sadomasochist werewolf lady, locked in a deadly game of cat and mouse with the hunter she seduced and betrayed and who has now made it his life’s goal to hunt her down?? give me 40k words about her right now immediately.

Perseyus Lathenna

holy shit yall, i didn’t even know about this character until i went looking, but she’s? amazing?? a tiny-ass grandma wizard who got the goodness traumatized out of her, and was then inspired to try again years later and ended up reclaiming that drive to help people? a disabled woman who innovates a new method of spellcasting that doesn’t need somatic gestures? a respected scholar who keeps her identity close to her chest, as a way to bypass the systematic inequality of the cultures she’s working in? holy shit i love her. put her in your game so help me god.

Tara Kolyana

listen i know we all love Ireena but 5e did her so so dirty, and 3e for all its faults gave us Tara. homegirl’s parents saw the writing on the wall and got the fuck out of dodge, and it fucking? worked?? she’s free? mostly. mostly free. the narrative tugs and tugs like an undertow but she’s had time to grow now, time to become a wholeass person outside of Barovia, outside of her destiny, and who knows what she could do now? who knows what kind of power she could have if she went back to Barovia as an adult, a full-fledged cleric with a solid sense of her self and her duty.

Ebb

literally who doesn’t love a fuckmassive shadow dragon. she’s fantastic, she’s goth, her best friend is a wizard, what more can i say? 

Lyssa von Zarovich

light of my life, girlboss of my heart, this list would not be complete without Lyssa. Strahd’s direct grandniece by way of the oft-forgotten middle brother Sturm, her goals are simple; reduce Strahd to a fine ash for the crime of piledriving the family’s history and reputation, and do some actually functional governing in Barovia. and she’s a genius! she not only found out about Strahd’s Big Oopsie entirely independently of anyone else in the know, she then looked at what uncle dearest had done and said “yeah i’ll have what he’s having” and fuckign followed through. and then! discovered a way to speedrun vampire power levels via a ghost booty call! and then invented vampire mindflayers, just bc she hadn’t broken enough records that week. 

she’s an excellent foil for Strahd, an ambitious, intelligent, and politically savvy woman who took the vampirism deal (literally the only other character to do so besides Strahd) with the full knowledge of what it entailed; as a means to an end, not an impulsive sacrifice. most of the material she’s got (and even in older editions there isn’t much) positions her as a middle-strength villain, but honestly i want to see her as a lesser-of-many-evils ally.

[vacantgodling]

may i perhaps know about whisper of the fire?

oh whisper. gaslight, gatekeep, experiment on your sister and have karma smack you to all hell for it girlboss (debatable)

(as an aside i’m not putting any of the historical characters as “spoilers” because as of the main canon, the history characters are several centuries removed so shit’s been happened pff)

n e way

whisper idanly was born as the younger twin between herself and her sister twilight. they were the children of the 2nd prince of the 5th ruler of argos, neiko. neiko was always jealous and bitter than his elder brother yazan was chosen by the oracle of muinens (OOMI) to succeed their father to the throne of argos and brought his daughters up with that same hatred. whisper took to it readily; a constant instigator among her cousins especially young mitică. however she and twilight never truly got along because of twilight’s more soft spoken and demure nature.

after the city of argos where they all lived was overrun during the summer of 477 by an overwhelming amount of chaos energy, both her father and mitică’s father (as well as their mothers and all of mitică’s siblings sans pinella) were killed. the OOMI chose mitică as the next ruler decreed by the goddess MUINENS, despite the fact that he was only 18 and most rulers are chosen at 30. as his first decree as king, mitică decided that they should as a people flee argos and the hastily thrown together stronghold of eros because the chaos in argos would threaten to overrun them at any moment. whisper saw this as an opportunity to seize power, and she quickly refuted this—stating that a true king would stand against this calamity and reclaim the kingdom for himself.

though not much of the population, a sizable number of denizens of the kingdom agreed with her and split into two factions, eventually called the nomads and the aegeans, who would stay in eros and strive to reclaim argos instead of traveling into the lands beyond and unknown. to signify this separation, whisper threw down oil and lit it ablaze with fire to separate the two factions, and earning herself the name whisper of the fire, first chieftain of aegos. (which is a combination of argos and eros’s names, at the time considering itself one nation. even in current history many extreme aegeans will call eros, aegos)

the goddess YLENE was born from these flames, her first role being the goddess of strife. this day also became known as the day of fissures.

from this incident she quickly got to work organizing those under her command. her cunning and ability to rally those under her name wasn’t to be understated and they quickly threw themselves into trying to reclaim their home capital of argos. at the same time, whisper began to work with scientists to create the HWM (or hunters with magic) research facility. its main goal was to transform the magic vis, which was born alongside YLENE, it into a darker, more depraved form that we would eventually come to call tenom. this led to the creation of the hunter class, as well as dark hunters, with the first dark hunter being the very unwilling participant twilight, eventually becoming known as twilightsorrow or the beast.

(whisper also had a weird chemistry with head researcher at the hwm, tenoma for whom tenom is named after. very uh. toxic girlboss shit going on there)

as things progress in eros, and it becomes a full fledged fortress amid the drastically fluctuating populous, whisper appoints 4 families to manage districts within the fort as well as specific aspects of ruling. that’s for another time but this is one of the aspects that leads to homegirl’s downfall. she becomes increasingly paranoid that the other families are plotting against her to overthrow her (she’s not entirely wrong but she can’t prove it type situation) and her erratic behavior causes her to start losing favor with the denizens.

some above her head shit happens (among the gods) and when whisper goes to seek counsel from YLENE’s oracle (or champion of honor) hyla, the oracle kills her. this was ordained by the gods.

her death however, sparks a civil war among the families under her vying for control and its a whole fucking MESS.

—

all of that plot and backstory aside, if you were reading this and thinking kinda azula energy? you aren’t wrong, azula was definitely an inspo for miss ma’am. whisper is a very ambitious person and mean spirited, but for a good while during her reign eros was perhaps the strongest that it ever had been; more laser focused on its goals to reclaim argos and operated more like a militia than an actual home. she even had programs in place beginning the aegean tradition of having children start learning sword play as young as 3 years old to be prepared for the inevitable sacrifice of going into argos and dying for the cause.

much of the things she implemented and her attitude towards weakness, power, and the duty of society still linger in eros like an echo chamber. while much of terranean history would look upon her as a fanatical dictator with little regard for those under her, aegeans of current day eros still worship her as a hero (and it also helps that the darker things she did such as the experimentation on twilight were purposefully destroyed; quite literally no one knows the true origins of the wind goddess, and whisper never learned that that was her sister’s fate either).

so in many centuries of separation she’s responsible for san’s inferiority complex and clear being disowned 💛

[the-pale-goddess]

Did Ethan or Tiffany have sex with anyone else after they met each other?

Thank you for this ask, lovely Anon! As per usual, I apologize for the delay in replying ❤️

No, they did not. Some context below the cut…👀

I know I’m in the minority here, but I can’t picture Ethan as a ONS/random flings kind of guy. I HC that he had his experience with casual sex when he was mending the wounds inflicted by the infamous med school lover. As intense as that period was, it also happened to be short-lived: he quickly realized that it’s not his cup of tea. He requires some deeper emotional connection with the partner to make the encounter meaningful, and Ethan Ramsey has no time or patience for meaningless things or people he doesn’t care about. He’s far too focused on his career to look for companionship—he doesn’t need it and doesn’t force it. People with demanding jobs go down that road quite often; it’s perfectly fine and doesn’t mean that we’re antisocial or anything of the sort.

Moreover, I don’t think that he’d ever want to distract himself by dipping into the dating pool after learning the truth about Naveen’s condition. Then Tiffany barged into his life and he found himself badly in need of her company 🥰

Tiffany is dedicated to achieving her ultimate goal: becoming the best doctor she can be. Casual dating seemed to be an unnecessary distraction and a waste of her precious energy. The internship and its hardships took up most of her time and attention, so she used the remaining scraps for relieving the stress in the most effective way through recharging her batteries alone or with her friends.

Prior to Miami, Tiffany went on two dates with one of her ex patients, but she ended things with Wayne before they had a chance to get steamy. Homegirl decided to fully embrace the fact that she was in love with her boss ksbkdbdkbd

[valleynix]

and like it felt the same like end goal wise. Miranda once again wants to use rose as a vessel for Eva. you already did that once can we have a different goal, like idk maybe Miranda trying to get a new physical body, or trying to escape the consciousness?????

It felt like lazy writing as well. Come up with a new idea we don’t need to see Miranda trying to resurrect her daughter from the grave. It would have felt like the stakes were higher if we had to stop her from escaping you know. It was just a little disappointing because like ‘oh guess I’m stopping this shit again a whole generation later’

right?? like it was kinda pointless imo 😭 we go through basically the same thing once more, similar concepts, oh look cameos, and like... idk, i feel like there was a better way to go about Rose and Ethan seeing each other again that didn't involve a really stupid reason of Miranda just being dumbed down to a cliché villain

idk how to articulate my thoughts well enough bc i'm running off of two red bulls rn, but it had a lot of potential to be threatening and scary and it was just... eh. didn't really make a whole lot of sense for this extremely intelligent scientist to go through the exact same process sixteen years later

the other thing i kinda thought was annoying was that they made Miranda just play with Ethan instead of getting rid of him so she could, yknow... get the crystal with Rose's powers... which is why she lured Rose there to begin with... but homegirl really just stood there and watched like ">:o" while Rose had her angsty teen moment 😭

i still loved the DLC but idk. there was so much wasted potential for the game and the DLC that i'll forever be mad about

[shoot1ng-stars]

This take is like everywhere and with really bad grammar, you need to read it like your a teenage girl who says like all the time

Okay so I need to let people know this like I just need this to be out there. The ending was lowkey ass So like why did signed and Caitlyn get their happy ending first I feel like the singed one explains itself. But like hear me out on Caitlyn’s, season one she was classist heavy and like shit talked all that vi holds dear to her (unknowingly ig) then looked at echo and told him his people were animals and continued to deny the damage Piltover does to the undercity, then had the audacity to defend the enforcers doing the damage “if they got more “aggressive “ then that’s why” oh my god SICK TO MY STOMACH FAM !! then yk after the bridge she’s talking to her mom and then starts telling them about the undercity, homegirls doing that just To rebel against them, also two seconds later turned in to said government, I feel like that says enough. Second season the whole her trying get kill jinx then she becoming a fashist? Talking about “those animals”, having the audacity get vi to be an enforcer, And yk what when vi was all like “do you know how that feels” and she was all “yes i do” hold up wait a minute no finding both your parents under rubble like looking your dead mom straight in her face just after she was killed by the people who are meant to protect them and then growing up knowing you will always be seen as the shit on their shoes and still continuing to be treated as such (even by your rich girlfriend) is nothing compared you’re politician mother who has done one good deed for said people, Jinx being dead and her being with vi is totally her happy ending and you can’t be like” well it’s vi’s too” not it not. her happy ending is with her sister. I don’t care what you guys say she is not choosing some coo over her sister (even tho like on the surface she has like her becoming and enforcer is crazy) time and time again she’s chose her sister. Which lead to vi and Cait basically breaking up. And ik it like foreshadowed with Isha “saving” jinx but like this whole time her goal was to either save her sister or find her. So you’re going to look me in the eye and put this shit on my screen.

I’m poor so all I see is rich classist nepo baby who constantly does bad things and no one says anything and who also hates poor people

Also her saying “I thought you were one of the good ones” immediately y’all should have been hating, but you didn’t? Literally Why?

but like we got go a wlw love story and one didn’t die so like a win but lowkey I don’t care I still would have preferred to see jinx and vi get their happy ending

[diaryofawhimsicalmaniac]

September 1st, 2024 [2:34 AM]

A friend had asked for my help with her resume. I had many friends resumes before, and frankly I enjoy the editing process. I know how to bullshit and make things sound fancy like I know what I'm talking about. Not lying on paper but certain words can make someone stand out and really highlight their experience and skills. I'm better at doing that for people than for myself. I have a solid friend group at this stage of my life and I am confident in their skills and capabilities. I want nothing more for them to shine and pursue the life they desire for themselves. I'm so happy to know such amazing and loving people...and more importantly I'm grateful for having these people who love me whole heartly and truly support me. Even despite my annoyances and flaws, they know who I am and how I operate.

When my friend sent me an old copy of her resume, I simply downloaded it and when I got the chance to work on after work. I just finished it now and when I was going to send, I actually read her previous email, and it stated that she needed it that night...which was yesterday. Whoops. I sent it to her anyways because regardless I know she could use the new revised resume. For a moment I felt bad that I didn't read her email correctly however I know that there was only so much I could do on my own time. Homegirl and I talked about me helping her a week or so prior... but we tend to both leave things to the last minute. One of the many quirks we share and have a mutual understanding about each other. In the past, I would have been guilt ridden...beating myself up for not doing all that I could have for a friend. Overlooking their responsibility in their own matter and shouldering the blame. Or the worst part...younger me possibly wouldn't have even followed thru to help at all...I would have been in my mind, not acknowledge my capabilities and panic about not doing things correctly and face rejection...so instead of trying and put my best efforts forward, I would have ignored the texts and situation all together. Pretend I never got the message...

I would let my insecurities get the best of me and out of stress, I would detached myself. I did this often when I was younger...it didn't make me a good friend or reliable person..

I was highly aware of this

it torn me apart

I was reminded of all these feeling when I was helping my friend. We had we worked together on her resume a few years before, and I had just came across a saved copy recently on my computer! So I had looked thru several thumb drives and folders to find it. Came across files that I had saved from college when I was 19/20 years old. Photography and Philosophy essays, word docs with links to YouTube videos and Tumblr pages that don't exist anymore. Fanfiction idea pages. Still pretty solid story ideas if I do say so myself. Among these docs were journal entries that I wrote to myself...some were reflections of the year and what I did, what goals I didn't reach for myself or even where I had traveled to that year. It was such a time capsule to see where I was at that time and what I doing...or how I was feeling...

There was one file in particular that was rather...I don't know how I would categorize it...Sad? Concerning? Insightful??

Eye Opening and Depressing for sure tho...

It was a letter I wrote to myself when I was 20. I forgot how much I hated myself...how unhappy with the person I was. The language I used towards myself really reflected how much pain I was in...I had this grand vision of the type of person I wanted to be however my insecurities and coping mechanisms were playing their part in my self-sabotage. I was disgusted with what I saw in the mirror and was no near of the type of person I wanted to be... When I talk about my early 20's, I refer it to a dark time of my life...a period of being stagnant and unhappy. Heavy shit...my mental now is lighter in comparison to how I was back then.

Perseverance, Boundaries, Faith, Good Friends and Weed really does make a difference.

Currently, I am 30 years old.

I am happy with the person I've become. I still have a version of myself in my head that I make comparisons to but I'm better at reminding myself to enjoy the person that currently exists. It helps that I have my friends who I tend to and they in return tend to me. Healthy boundaries with myself and others and acceptance for my flaws and the motivation to continue to grow and thrive. I don't wish to live my life in dread anymore, I'm living my life and I am here to enjoy the journey for as long as I'm able to.

I hope my friend gets that job she wants. Her resume is quite impressive...if I do say so myself

.