#holy shit lance thats fucked up

[posallys]

all right here is my word vomit live watch

IMMEDIATELY i am slapped in the face by toby stephens as poseidon i am FERAL

THE LUKE AND PERCY PARALLEL “LOOK, YOU DIDN’T WANT TO BE A HALFBLOOD” OH MY FUCKING GOD

THE MISSING LUKE AND PERCY TRAINING SCENES OH DEAR LORD THANK YOU THANK YOU

“When am i ever going to use this” percy i LOVE YOU

“So you can use them against your opponent” OH BOY

Finally some action i love a good sword fight

But where's annabeths necklace imma kill people

Ooh some god strength okay okay tasty

HELL YEAH POSEIDON POWERS FUCK HIS SHIT UPPPPPP 

“I WARNED YOU. IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL, YOU'LL FIND OUT WHO I AM” OH I LOVE THE ENERGY YESSSS FUCK YEAH

GO OFFF PERCY 

“AND YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST A KID”

Ares didn't curse him i hate it here

OH WHAT IS THAT VOICE

OH MY GOD THE CABIN SOMEBODY SEDATE ME

this can go one of two ways

“Violent seismic activity” MMM YUMMY

UH HULLO THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED ALECTO!???

I lied there was a secret 3rd way this could have gone and it happened 

OOP THERE’S THE NECKLACE

“Where's the glory in that” wow tell me you don't understand Percy's character without telling me you don't understand Percy's character 

“I don't have an appointment” THATS SO FUCKING ICONIC OF HIM

Wait i kind of fuck with this olympus i was picture all white and pristine but this FUCKS

“SHOULDN'T THEY BE JUST AS AFRAID OF US AS WE ARE OF THEM” OH MY FUCKING GOD. OH MY GOD. HOLY SHIT 

“you're learning fast” OH MY GODDDDDDDDD

“Things that are small and scary….” BROOOOOOOOOOOO

the show has rights for the luke and percy content and posally and percabeth and that's IT

LANCE REDDICK ❤️❤️❤️ greatest of all time rest in peace ❤️ (you'll always be Cedric daniels to me)

Ohhh king he does a bad ass zeus

Where's poseidon though DONT TAKE HIM FROM ME 😭😭😭

Lance ily

Lance reddick zeus you're perfect to ME

OHHHHH YES GOOD SHIT

percy jackson king of audacity 

AGHHHHHJJJDHH POSEIDON I LOVE YOU BRIAN BROMEN OH FUCK YES IM. SNKDKKWKWJFKMQ3LI4HRND IM VIBRATING NRJNW OHMYGID

IM THROWING UP OH MY GOD

“I SURRENDER” OH BROTHER DO I HAVE THOUGHTS THOUGHTS TOO MANY THOUGHTS FUCKKKKK

OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDD IM GOING TO PUKE

TOBY STEPHENS LOVE OF MY LIFE

I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE UNWELL IN MY ENTIRE LIFE

SHUT UP NOBODY TOUCH ME

“OBEDIENCE DOESNT COME NATURALLY TO YOU DOES IT” ohhhhhhhh brother call me an ambulance 

“I must take some of the blame i suppose” so you CAN read the books you just chose not to for the other 7 episodes….

THE SEA DOES NOT LIKE TO BE RESTRAINED FUCK YEAHHHHHB BROTHER

HIM ONLY UNDERSTANDING THE WORD FATHER IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF IM SOBBING 

POSEIDON SMILE IM DYING 

I DIDN'T LEARN IT FROM CHIRON AND THEN POSEIDONS FACE OH FUCK IM PUKING SHAKING CRYING

IM SO SO SO UNWELL IM LITERALLY INCOHERENT 

“Ares is a moron, as you noticed” STOP I LOVE HIM THERES THAT ASSHAT POSEIDON ENERGY IM LOOKING FOR

“of course we dream, why do you ask” “DO YOU EVER DREAM ABOUT MOM” I AM DEAD I DIED I ASCENDED IM FLOATING LEVITATING FLYING OH DEAR LORD OH MY GOD IM SO SO SO ILL

TOBY STEPHENS THE MAN THAT YOU ARE POSEIDON THE MAN THAT YOU ARE OH MY GOD HIM GOLDING PERCYS HEA DIM VIMITING SHITING MYSELF KILLING DYING DEAD DJFICJJWOKDKDJN FUCK ME FUCK FICK

TOBY TOBY TOBY YOURE PERFECTVTHE PAIN THE FACIAL EXPTESSUINNS IM DYING DEAD

THE PEARL KILL KILL KJAJDJWKKDJJDJDUEJJ2NH3H

I AM HYPERVENTILATING 

Not to be greedy BUT WHERE IS THE QUEEN AMING WOMEN WHERE THE FUCK WAS IT YOU CANNOT GIVE ME ALL OF THAT AND THEN NOT GIVE ME THE MOST FUCKING ICONIC LINE OF ALL TIME WHAT THE ACTUAL ABSOLUTE FUCK I AM GOING THROUGH SO MANY EMOTIONS WHATBTHEFUCK

there's still 20 minutes left taylor breathe it can still happen 

PERCABETH HUG MY RELIGION

annabeth luke percy trio is SOOOOO interesting to me

I hate percy knowing :( ur a bit too perceptive buddy but it's okay 

“I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D GIVE THEM TO GROVER TO WEAR” SHOOT ME IT WOULD PROBABLY FEEL ABOUT THE SAME

THE GODS ARE MY ENEMY, YOU IM HERE TO RECRUIT OHHHHH BROTHER

OH HELLO BACKBITER LORE OKAY

LUKE I GET YOU I UNDERSTAND

I MET YOUR DAD *SLASH* OH THEY GOT HIM THEY GOT HIM GOOD

LUKE PERCY FIGHT MY EYES HAVE BEEN BLESSED IN THIS DAY

PERCY APOLOGIZING HONEY UR TOO SWEET

ANNABETH OH FUCK OH HELLO

So tell me what are the plans for ttc now lol

I HEARD EVERYTHING ANNABETH HONEY COME HERE I NEED TO HUG YOU

I must ask….where the FUCK was this energy the rest of the season this episode is literally so insane it almost makes up for the rest of everything

“How does she feel abt all of this” ooh yummy i like the foreshadowing 

“I imagine she's thrilled” WRONG thalia would stomp freddy chases head in if given the chance

LEAH UR BRAIDS ARE GORGEOUS

stop percy had HEART EYES 24/7 FOR HER IM GOING TO COMBUST

“JUST BE A KID” IM SOBBING

THE SEARCHERS LICENSE IM CRYING SOBBING UR PERFECT GROVER 

“I'LL FIND YOU” FORESHADDDDDDDOWWWINGGGGGGGG

“NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS WE MEET BACK HERE NEXT YEAR”, OH I LOVE THEM IM CRYING SOBBING OH MY BABIES

MONTAUK IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF FUCK DUDE U CANT DO THIS 

i want poseidon to be there i know he wont be but i NEED it

Stop honey percy ilyyyyy you're such a sweetheart im kissing ur forehead and tucking u in

OH HELLO “IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP” WOOOOAHHHHHHHH OKAY

“WE'RE STILL DOING THIS” LMFAOOOOO

“TURNS OUT IM PRETTY GOOD AT THIS….COME FIND ME” CRAZY 

……MOTHERFUCKER if they dont show gabe dying im gonna riot

WHERE WAS THE REST OF MY POSALLY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 YOU CAN'T GIVE ME SOME AND THEN TAKE AWAY THE LITTLE FROM THE BOOKS

WHERE IS SALLY MURDERING GABE HELLO

AHHH END SCENE LOL AH THE BOX

THE IMPLICATION THAT IT WAS ALL POSEIDON……..WHAT IF I DIE OH MY GOD

[wi55iams]

📕More Cruise AU. MORE. <3

Ok FINE. IF YOU INSIST i wanna talk about it so so bad actually please send more asks people ty

Hiding under cut cause its long ahdkdl

As established we have Captain Alonso and Entertainment host Lance. But ofc the entire grid have got to be here

Charles, Carlos and George are all third officers. Which means they take it in turn to stand on the bridge and drive. George is always sucking up to the higher ups cause he wants a promotion really really badly but he also is the best at his job. Carlos and Charles start constant debates about 'interpretation of the colregs' and 'your knowledge of the rules' and spend most of their time passive aggresively flirting and not doing their jobs.

KMag, Hulkenberg and Valterri are the higher ranking officers. Kmag and Nico have both been passed over for promotions and are at each others necks in a sexual and violent way. Valterri is the first officer for passage planning. Which means he sits at the computer and draws lines on charts all day and doesnt get involved with that bullshit

I want Max to be a prodigy still so he's Chief officer. He organises all the maintenace and is Fucking Done with the 50 situationships ocurring around him

Saftey and Staff captain... Im gonna make Staff Nico Rosberg because holy shit him being second in command to Fernando is hilarious. And just second in command at all really. Also means he can have a good brocedes dynamic with lewis

Saftey officrr is Mark Webber. Someone has to make sure all the injuries these chucklefucks get are recorded and organise the weekly drills. He and Fernando went through boat school together... they were close... he doesnt like Nandos new boytoy very much

Thats just the deck department im still going

Alex, Lando, Logan, Lance, and Esteban are all entertainers. Lando I imagine would be a dancer doing backflips on stage, Logan a sensual operatic singer, and the remainder hosts for the various events onboard. Lando and Carlos meet up frequently in the crew bar to get drunk after work.

Daniel is the Cruise Director who the passengers fucking love hes hilarious and makes time for anyone who talks to him and his organised entertainment is very good.

Pierre is the DJ/sound technician for the stage and he and Esteban have had. A thing.

Lewis is the Hotel Director. It doesnt sound like an important job but its one of the most important on any cruise ships because hotel = guests = money so the hotel has to be banger. Lewis rules the hotel department with a patient yet iron fist. He and Staff captain Rosberg frequently butt heads.

Zhou I struggled with but I think he'd make a nice nurse in the medical department! Good at remaining well spoken and chill in the face of passengers complaining.

Yuki is absolutely the head chef running his restaurant, he is ordering 3000 cooks around constantly and he NEEDED THAT LAMB DONE FIVE MINUTES AGO-

Oscar is the ETO, which is basically an electrician. Keeps out of the way of the bullshit but has no choice to listen to Carlos whine about Charles while he fixes the screen they broke

Checo is an engineer cause he also doesnt partake in grid drama. He waits for the bridge to call him to tell him to press the on button for the engines. Chats with Osc about how #crazy everyone else is

And finally we have Seb and Kimi... who dont work on the ship. They are retired mariners. Seb now works as an instructor at an academy part time and also a marine pilot for a nearby port. Kimi works on a tugboat at that same port. They are gay married and frequently recieve texts from their good friends Fernando and Mark about what whacky bullshit is happening now

[cheemken]

Knight I had a small angsty vision of the newest AU, while listening to Gods Mercy of all songs lmao

Actually it’s full on angst™️

Just,,,when all the Champions are captured, they get tortured to death instead of, idk, shooting them or something quick and relatively painless

Cause like Team RR is using them both as a show of power, but also what will happen to rebels and traitors if they don’t agree with Team RR

Imagine it being worse that they give E4 and gym leaders a change to join their side, cause they’re all strong trainer, before they label them as traitors, but not the Champions just to rub salt in the wound. Truly letting them know they have 0% chance of finding a way out of dying

Anyways yeah, Giovanni ordering them to stab Lance all over his body in non lethal parts, letting him slowly bleed out and watch the rest, Maxie ordering for Steven to be slowly burnt alive, Archie ordering the grunts to water board Wallace before finally drowning him, Iris being mauled to death by Dragon Types, just horrid deaths they all got

But wait ‼️‼️

What about SilkWing angst, like Giovanni ordering the grunts to kill Iris in front of Diantha and Lance, and both of them have to watch their practically get eaten alive. Them just screaming at the Leaders to let Iris live, saying “she’s only a teenager she doesn’t deserve this” “we don’t care what happens to us just let her go please”

But of course, Diantha’s gonna be next

Just Giovanni being an evil leader and killing Lances family in front of him before he dies himself

Also sorry if this is to much. Feel free to delete if you don’t want to answer this and just let me know so I don’t send something like this again

YOUR HONOUR THATS SO GOOD WHAT CBMDBCMDND

Oh love myself some torture fr fr if you have more concepts like this send em my way, man you don't understand I had like the whumpiest au back then in my old fandom and it low-key broke some people hahahaha the torture and abuse in that au was too much too ig but hey

Ough that's so good tho what the fuck😭😭😭 just bcmxbxmx yo idk this got me excited holy shit hahahah

Like, you know what would be so so fucked up SHIT FUCKING IMAGINE CHMDBXNDND if Lysandre knows just what would really fuck Diantha up, for not joining him, for wasting her beauty, for trying to stop him, is that instead of Dragon types being the ones to kill Iris, it's a pack of Houndoom. Like. She's literally being fed to the Houndoom and Diantha could only watch as she screams and writhes in her confines, screaming at Lysandre, cursing him, and Lysandre could only smirk as she watches her daughter get killed, and soon she'll follow suit

Like cjxncbmxbxsk OUGHHHHH IMAGINE TOO THO LIKE CNDNCBDN once all of the other Champions are dead and Lance is still around, Giovanni's there smirking at him, telling him that he must be missing a few people, he really wants to see just how Lance breaks. As if his daughter and wife wasn't enough fucking imagine Gio calls in the grunts and the other leaders to take Clair and Silver right where Lance is, and got them killed in front of him too cbmxnx like Gio's too deep within that rabbit hole that he had no problems having Silver killed, so Lance had to also watch his cousin and his son die before him man like csxjdmdjdkd

Ough bonus points if Lance is there just basically begging Giovanni to kill him, but for Gio that would be mercy, and why would he ever show him mercy y'know? Imagine if Gio and the other leaders kept him alive, making him watch as they destroy his home, his region, and the next will soon follow, he was forced to watch innocent people die, and Gio's there leaning close to him, forcing him to watch, "see how powerless you are? Are you truly still worthy of being called a Champion?" And he could only laugh as he watches the last bit of hope in Lance's eyes get extinguished, his defences crumbling, he was nothing more than a shell of his former self, and god did Giovanni revel in it.

[knightbugs]

i really feel the need to share this bit from Arms and Armour of the Medieval Joust by Tobias Capwell (from the Royal Armouries Arms and Armour series) about a joust between Gaston de Foix and Philippe de Lenoncourt: In one encounter he faced another great jouster, Philippe de Lenoncourt, and when they crashed together, Gaston's spear went through Lenoncourt's sight, but amazingly missed his head, passing up into the crown of the helm to lift him out of the saddle so that he dangled helplessly from Gaston's lance, in what must be considered one of the strangest and most unexpected of jousting incidents. Undoubtedly he was held aloft for only a brief instant, before the overwhelming load placed on the end of the lance must have forced it to drop down to the ground. Lenoncourt was apparently so confused by what was going on that he did not know whether he was 'in heaven or on earth'. His attendants quite understandably assumed that he was dead and were amazed when he showed himself to be unhurt. But he declined to joust again that day.

thats so fucking funny. imagine witnessing this guy get lifted up with a lance like a cat by the scruff holy shit. he declined to joust again that day

[screechingcheesecakecheesecake]

CH 134

What

The

Fuck

.... Theres so many things to comment I'm just... What the fuck.

My heart broke with how Isolde flinched when he reached his hand out... Go fucking die Leland holy shit.

AND THE TRAINING WITH BLAINE AND LANCE?!? THATS STRAIGHT UP TORTURE?! HELL, EVEN WITH FREDERICK?!? THERES JUST. WHAT THE FUCK???

Yknow the heartbreaking thing about Frederick's? Is that in the book and in his dream, the well has an open hole, but in this chapter, that well has been sealed tight.

... I really hope Lorena's defense works...

By of Lorena, I wonder if she's working on some weapon?

[alloutofgoddesses]

PJO TV THOUGHTS

Season 1, Episode 8

(I have read the books there’s a chance I will talk about them)

I have been cured of my illness from last week let’s gooo

Luke voice over parading the beginning voice over?!?!

LUKE TRAINING PERCY

Damn he’s a really fucking good swordsman 10/10 Charlie

Oh Percy… oh boy oh boy

Ares you’re funny… keep that humour

OH ANNABETH DOESN’T EVEN KNOW YET

She’s not dead though she’s frozen in Hades’ throne room

AND HERE WE GOOOOO

Damn he’s kinda wiping the floor with him

Ope he just kicked him into water it’s so over for him

THE WAVE

“I warned you… if you’re not careful… you’ll find out who I am.” WITH THE WAVE GROWING BEHIND HIM I KNOW THAT’S RIGHT

THAT’S THE MOST POWERFUL DEMIGOD THAT’S EVER LIVED BABEY

Right in the Achilles too oof

That look of awe on Annabeth’s face… girlie is GONE

I’m so excited about the Ares v Percy antagonistic relationship to continue forever (even when Percy had lost his memory)

Hey Alecto

I guess Hades doesn’t need to breathe but damn that helm looks uncomfortable AF

HE SAID PLEASE HE JUST WANTS HIS MOM

Percy I have bad news for you

I’d like to see Zeus try personally

HE’S A GOOD KID

Everyone stay calm it’s happening

IT’S HAPPENING

That fucking look. They’re so gone on each other thank you Walker and Leah

Incredible Percy move 10/10 no notes

Oh my god that’s Olympus… it’s getting me so bad and I don’t know why THATS OLYMPUS

I did in fact rewind because I saw some movement in one of the buildings. I would love to know who that is

OH LUKE’S SMIRK WHEN PERCY SAYS THE GODS SHOULD BE AFRAID OF DEMIGODS

He is SO SURE he has a new recruit. Percy is unknowingly saying everything Luke wants him to say

Why are you airing Annabeth’s shit Luke damn

Or taken outside where they belong

You know Zeus put all those stairs there on purpose. Malicious ass bitch

FIRE! Hi Hestia I love you sweetheart

RIP personalized thrones you’ll always be famous

HI ZEUS HI MR LANCE REDDICK

The way Percy is willing to risk everything to get the message to Zeus oh baby

Also Poseidon bestie these two alone is a VERY bad come quickly

Percy you’re gonna get fried

Girl just because you’re his son doesn’t mean you know him… arguably you know him the least of all your siblings because you were never swallowed and grew up in hiding from him specially

Damn that condescending sigh

Percy please shut the fuck up

PERCY

He’s about to die

OOP

Just in the nick of time Poseidon

HE SURRENDERS OOOOALAJDJSK

“Take your victory. Just spare my son.” NEVER BEATING THE ALLEGATIONS THAT PERCY IS HIS FAVORITE SON

“Your forbidden son” Dude you had TWO by the SAME WOMAN in two different forms don’t be a hypocrite (is the biggest hypocrite ever)

HELL YEAH SPEAK YOUR SHIT POSEIDON DON’T LET HIM GET AWAY WITH IT

And he full named Percy

Oh shit Ancient Greek

Ares and Hermes biggest gossips in the Greek pantheon confirmed

Dude HE SURRENDERED

Zeus I have bad news for you… “this one” is about to earn a Mount Olympus fast pass

OMG IT’S TIME

HE SAID (one of) THE LINE(s)

SALLY TAUGHT HIM ANCIENT GREEK HOLY SHIT I THOUGHT I COULDN’T LOVE HER MORE

“Ares is a moron” I cackled

Poseidon don’t be a pussy hug him

Also the way Walker is already so tall. He might tower over the dude playing his father by the end of this series (I know that’s Toby Stephens)

Baby that’s not a no

OH HE WANTS TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH HIS SON

That tree is person-ing so hard. They had to have built that shit

PERCABETH HUG

Omg hi Clarisse… so sorry you got framed

Luke jumpscare

Like you said anything

OH NO PERCY DON’T

It’s time for smart Percy to come out again

And the helm

Hmm. Who could possibly betray you

Why would he? He had no reason to

Yeah he did. He sure did.

I don’t know how to articulate my feelings on the line delivery of “I didn’t know you’d give them to Grover to wear” but know Charlie is killing me with how good of an actor he is

“None of this was meant to betray you” YOU WANTED TO SEND HIM TO TARTARUS! Did you expect Kronos to just spit him back out?

Luke trying to recruit Percy instead of luring him into the woods to scorpion him is SUCH a a good change I love it so much and it’s such a clear character choice for Luke

AH BACKBITER

(The way I literally jumped when it came on screen that sword is so fucking scary)

Correct reaction Percy

Honestly Percy is 100% correct Luke got manipulated he just hasn’t realised it yet

Shouldn’t have mentioned his dad Percy. ABSOLUTELY the wrong move

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ PERCY THAT FATAL FLAW IS SHOWING

Oh noooo I knew Annabeth was gonna be there but that doesn’t make it hurt any less

Bye bye Luke. Go get your yacht

I love that we know the horse half of Chiron was a literal horse Glynn was riding

Ldjdkslsjak Chiron knows the prophecy so OF COURSE he’s worried about Percy agreeing with Luke

Dionysus it’s Peter Johnson don’t listen to him

“You get out!” Lol

HELLO

FULL STOP

EVERYONE CEASE YOUR ACTIVTIES

LOOK AT ANNABETH’S HAIR!!!!!!!

IT’S SO PRETTY

THAT’S A PRINCESS HAIRSTYLE FOR SURE

She’s going to DisneyWorld 🥺

Percy is so excited for her

What if I cry

Hello Seatcher’s License

THE SEAS!!! See you in Florida Grover

Well you might have to go pick up a certain member of the team

GROUP HUG

He walked to the Montauk cabin? I mean I guess it’s closer than his apartment

SALLY!

THAT’S THE MAMA’S BOY

what

KRONOS GET OUT OF HERE NASTY ASS

He’s been at this for maybe like three months and he’s already so tired lol

“Turns out I’m pretty good at this” honey you’re kinda the best at this

Did Kronos just mention the prophecy

Seventh grade!! Aaahhhh I’m so excited

Calling him Grandpa is funny though

HE LOVES HIS MOM SO MUCH I’M GONNA SOB

Blue pancakes!

He’s gonna go meet Tyson

Also the voiceover that parallels what he says in the books about how “you might be one of us” I’m inconsolable

Lance Reddick, thank you so much for your performance and I’m heartbroken that this is the last time we’ll see you as Zeus. I hope you’re resting easy

Oh great… he’s still here

DIVORCE YOU SAY

SHE CHANGED THE LOCKS

Get a hotel idiot

Uh oh

Well they’ll come home to a surprise

Also? Sallly doesn’t get to do a little murder? Not even as a treat? She better still get to sell him

[sweetiepeteypie]

Skimming for Stephen Claithorne (Spoilers)

never watched an episode of jonathans creek before but i hear this is a halloween episode so im stoked!! literally all i know about stevie claithorne (not to be confused with stevie daker) is that hes a priest. thats it. otherwise im going in fully blind.

well, helloooooo, father~

always the lil smile 🥹🥹

the father is shocked and appalled (and very on-edge, bless him)

just what is it about men of god thats so breedable....

he has vibes like if campion was a kicked puppy with an even more intense resting bitch face. i love him. (he has such kind eyes....)

not petey but 'ouija world' is such a fun book name holy shit

father claithorne about to make me ACT UP

my love, youre not going to be the killer again, are you? (since lance, i can never tell if youre being perfect and lovely bc thats just what you are or if youre plotting 🤔🤔)*

omL STEVIE SPOONING CONFIRMED YESYESYES

oh hes so cute im gonna barkbarkbarkbark ggrrrrrrrr

he is befuddled and perturbed (but how much do we believe his wife is the killer? and who assisted her if she was?)

blurry anger. also yeah it makes sense that his wife teamed up with her step-dad to kill her mom. only thing is, can stevie forgive her? (also were they fucking or was this not like a romantic thing hmmm)

ohhhh hes angy. sarcasm 100

he said 😐😐

oh hes absolutely going to have a crisis later, bless his little heart

*he wasnt the killer, he really is just adorable and the nicest man to ever live

in summary;

soft boy just wants to help his wife despite not being terribly fond of her mother. tries to help his wife as she grieves and ends up finding that she and his father-in-law were in cahoots to kill his mother-in-law.

he seems to have strong morals but will he put those aside to stay with his wife? (not if i have anything to say about it)

he absolutely needs to do some soul searching

i wanna say hes a very affectionate service top (maybe more experienced than one would give him credit for)

i want to say he was probably a born-again christian? idk i just get the vibe that he wasnt always devout

[gringolet]

hey wait holy shit

while we're talking about ~dark galahad~ i think his grail quest actually killed more people than mordred did, statistically speaking

knights who die on the grail quest:

percival

dinadan

yvain

bademagus

colgrevance

galahad himself

and between 29 and 27 other unnamed knights

knights who die at camlann

arthur, obviously

mordred

lucan? i guess

an unrecorded number of other knights who apparently didn't matter enough to name or count

but neither of those statistics is as impressive as the number of named knights lancelot kills while rescuing guinevere/escaping, holy shit his team kills are insane

agravaine

gaheris

gareth

gingalain

colgrevance

mador de la porte

meloit

petipase

galleron

melion

astamore

gromore

curselaine

florence

lovel

belliance

segwarides

griflet

brandiles

aglovale

tor

gauter

gillimer

damas

priamus

driant

reynolds

kay (but a different kay)

lambergus

herminde

pertilope

perimones

the lesson here is that the road to murdering dozens of your coworkers is paved with good intentions and that people named du loc are 100% more dangerous that the emo bastard destined to kill you

[non-neutoniangender]

Well first of all, what the heck is this ad read!?!?!? What the hell are these costumes, what the hell does this have to do with boy bands. These puns are reeeeeaaaaal bad. Why is everyone a Lance!??!?!?! This is actually really bad but really good ad spot Holy shit.

Anyway reunited part 2 thoughts:

Damn Taliesin popping off with knowing even some amount of a lvl 17 character.

Also this is all gonna be combat huh

The rhymes are good "features and traits"

The Bob bobs are back bby!!!!

I love that now Taliesin is involved in I Would Like To Rage !!!!

Also Yasha has a new sword!!!!!!!!!!!! So cool!!!

Jester casts earthquake!!!!

Counterspell hours!!!! I love counterspell

"What are you?" "A problem" Daaaaaaamn 51 damage hot damn

Also sam what the fuck is this flask, a snack cart?!?!?!

Daaaamn beau what!??!??! Girl is up to some shit

Yo this collapsing temple bit is so rad, like what incredible stakes and also what a great setpeice.

Omg the on the fly editing is so cool!!!! The little pebbles!!

Oh my god Travis not the "I know" like he's talking to an upset kid or pet

Damn the beau Caleb synergy is real cool!!! I love that they've been practicing

What a wack end to a battle, its such a so close but so far situation I love it!!!

Oh my god they're stuck

Make an intimidation check against a betrayer god

"Let's get another god in that body"

Oh my god another sword for fjord. A sword per god this is wild. It's so in theme, it's so...... its great

Is it another vestige?

No!! It's a legendary weapon

Offering the rapier to king!?!? A great idea.

"I'm a glorified librarian" *the entire cast immediately disagrees* "I'm not disagreeing, I just can't get you a ship"

Oh shit the storm is starting

I dont know the history with this sea capitan (God I hate spelling) but she's cool, I like her

"I dont know what I could offer that you dont already have at your disposal, Caleb Widowgast" daaamn yussa

"Dont study too much, you're catching up too quick" daaang I love this dynamic

Like holy shit

Oh I love this Kingsley conversation

Shit I forgot how sincere and good at talking Beau was. I love her!!!

Awww this whole conversation is precious

"A little bit of selfishness is definitely good for survival. A lot of selfishness alienates everyone around you" damn Beau

Oh my god I haven't gushed about this set yet!!! Its amazing!!

Ooo this map!!!! Oooo the boat! Ooooo the lights

Yooooooooo this mini!!!!! (s) THE FOG!!!

Gil!!! I kinda forgot about gil, he's great

The eyes!!! The colors!!!

Such a good fight!

(Also started a new scarf)

I have a lap cat

Liiiaaaaaaammmm you didn't have to pop off with a blue dragon WITH A EYEBROW PEIRCING!?!?!?! Holy shit

Also rogue nat 20!!!!

New Tasha tatoo!!!!!!!

Travis with the cone of cold geometry!!!

Holy shit mass heal!!! Thats everyone almost to full good god!!!

More healing than she did the entire campaign

That 1 dimension door!!!!!

Beau really has a knack for getting out of getting swallowed

Damn that HDYWTDT was really cool!!

Ooooo Fjord with the subtle digs "your lap dog"

Also this set is so cool!!!

The look on Travis' face when Jester says she opens an art studio!!

Also that use of the miraculous paint is a great idea

Caleb takes a teaching position at Soltryce!!!

Caleb starts Mighty Nein reuinion tour

Essek!!!! "Xorhasian good looks"

"Dear" 🥺🥺🥺🥺

A kiss!!!!!!!!

Aaaaaa this is exactly the kind of relationship I wanted to be cannon!!!

This is so exciting!!!!! :D

What a good episode.

Last scarf update, progress on scarf 1, like 10 inches on scarf 2!

[wulfhalls]

cannibalism?? during the crusades???

oh yeah yeah yeah. so. the boys were rocking up at antioch like. lets do some proper good siege warfare on this bitch ass city. but then. a realisation! wait up! we don't have any resources here to back this well thought-out meticulously planned venture up? like no means to fashion siege engines hardly any food a bunch of the boys already died on the way here? so they were stretched THIN. they were camping out in front of the very well fortified walls thinking. my brothers in christ this isn't like burning man at all. ANYWAYS they get word a fucking 40k strong Muslim army is on the way to this very location!!!! and they're like well shit!!! Its getting too hot here so they casually insanely do the impossible and actually conquer the city?? and are like?? fuck yes chaps we done did it #blessed #godisgood so. they in this bitch ass city now and realise well well well if it's not the consequence of our actions :/we've been besieging this city so long they got no resources left either so we're still super fucked :/ and now the Muslim army is here so we're super duper extra fucked :/// so they're like we should surrender this is so fucked. fuck us. but then. A Prophet enters stage left. some random ass peasant is like. fret no more I, the voice of God, am here. he's like God Our Lord In Heaven has bestowed upon me the knowledge to ascertain the resting place of His Holy Lance. its in that random ditch! and the boys are like well shit we ain't got nothing to lose so. might as well. when in rome and all that. and then they just find the fucking thing (well they found Something anyways which. statistically not that improbable given the extensive lance usage in the 1000+ years since but.) anyways resounding rejoicing all around! merriment! excitement! religious fervor rushing thru the streets people praising The Lord Jesus Christ And God Above In Heaven thinking by god we are sooo back its unreal. god is back on their side and #blessed their crusades religion is sexi again and hope is back!! so they do the impossible AGAIN and defeat the enemy army immediately because GOD (jk for like 2 weeks after the lance was found fuck all happened and they were like so desperate at that point cause they only had 2 options either starve to death inside the city or do a sexi hail mary last stand religion is so hot type suicide attack and ofc they went with that cause thats just how catholics are like) ANYWAYS so they done did it again. exultations. ect ect Until. still no fucking food ☹ and like they are starving at this point right like they were starving 2 months ago but now they're STARVING starving. so they look around and are like......... hey....... chaps..... do u see all those dead enemy soldiers laying about here...... and the others are like..... no.. dont.... dont even think about it. and the others are like..... bro..... humans are like made of meat..... just a thought tho.... like just putting it out there..... just something to marinade on I guess... 🤭 anyways they eat a bunch of their dead enemies and word gets around to the local Muslim Lords and they are like these white people fucking crazy son we do not wanna fuck with that. new crusader state: UNLOCKED! and thats how far sheer desperation will get u!

[haruhey]

chronological thoughts of THE WALKING DEAD FINALE???

- im literally SO EXCITED

- SOMEONE HELP JUDITH SHES LIKE 3

- NOOO THE STORM TROOPERS

- lmaooo daryl got got

- omg judith doing the absolute most rn

- im sorry passed out daryl is such a funny shot

- if i dont see rick i will throw a fit

- OMG first girl off my list

- CAROL LEADING THEM IKTR ❤️

- OMG JUST A HARD CUT??

- aw omg i feel so bad for him

- NOO 5 MINUTES IN AND IM SOBBING BYEEEEE

- NOO I LIKED HIM A LOT

- I HAD FAITH IN HIM

- they r really going thru it

- OMG MY HEADCANON OF HIS BLOOD TYPE WAS RIGHT???? im publishing that fic rn

- stop sharing looks ur gonna make me scream

- judith if u die im gonna kill u

- PRINCESS SAVUNG UR MAN FRRRRR THIS SHIT IS VALID ASF !!!

- NEGAN GET AWAY FROM MAGGIE GET AWAY BACK

- THAT TRUCK IS MASSIVE

- COCO IS SAFE COCO IS SAFE IM GONNA SCREAMMMMMMM THIS SHOW IS SO AWESOME

- omg judith is alive thats so legendary

- she had plot armour anyways

- tender daryl ik he slayed ❤️❤️

- JUST KEEP HER BARRICADED

- omg ik it

- omg who tf was that that died

- UMMM they’re fucked

- i would simply die i could not survive this sorry to daryl but im different

- CLIMB FASTER ROSITA’S GONNA DIE

- SHES GONNA DIE

- ROSITA SLAY ROSITA SLAY

- my heart is literally beating out of my fucking chest holy shit

- omg i forgot about tomi i hope he survives

- tomi is kinda…

- hey tomi….?

- I CANT BELIEVE THEY DID THAT TO MY GIRL LYDIA

- NO JERRY IS GONNA BE FINE HE HAS SO MANY KIDS HE’LL BE OKAY IF HE DIES I’M GONNA THROW A FIT

- MAGGIE DOESNT NEED SHIT FROM YOU NEGAN

- whatever negan i hate you i hate yoy i hate you so much i hate you sooooo much

- at least he’s apologizing genuinely now

- ok coco is so cute

- EUGENE IS SO CUTE MY PATHETIC BABY

- look at how far he’s come

- NOOO SHE GOT BIT NOOOO

- ur really cramping her vibe rn eugene get over urself

- I LOVE THEM SO MUCH UR HONOR PLEASE 😭😭😭

- rosita it should have been gabriel ik im so sorry it should have been ME

- CARYL PARENTS 🫶🫶🫶🫶

- THEYRE KILLING PEOPLE????

- ummmm

- EZEKIEL SLAY ily ily

- omg caryl just radio silent

- OOOO BIG BAD FIGHT BIG BAD FIGHT SLAYYYY

- OMG THAT GIRL FROM THE KINGDOM IS STILL HERE thats so awesome i love her

- YOU SHOT A CHILD LMAOOOOOO

- HOLY SHIT THAT IS SO MANY WALKERS

- slay gabriel

- omg daryl gained consciousness

- JUST ALL FIGHT THE WALKERS I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY WERE FIGHTING EACH OTHER YALL HAVE A COMMON ENEMY

- SLAY DARYL SLAY

- KILL HERRRR KILL HERERR

- JERRY IS ALIVE IK MY MAN WOULD MAKE IT IK IT JERRY I LOVE YOUUUUUU

- lmao lance

- she fucked him ik she did

- sniper on the rooftop

- OMG A ROCK DIVERSION

- i just know @belatalbotgf is getting flashbacks

- omg they have little codenames thats awesome

- OMG THEYRE BLOWING THEM UP

- simply a rick parallel

- OH MY GOD THEY BLEW UP EVERYTHING

- carol looks so hot rn im sorry im distracted

- SHE IS SO PETTY I LOVE HERRRR

- omg leaving w her boytoy in tow that’s such a power move

- i wish maggie would just be toxic and kill him

- GLENN WAS BEAUTIFUL I WILL NEVER LOVE ANYONE LIKE THAT AGAIN SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP UR CRAZY FOR THIS MAGGIE

- MAGGIE SLAY DONT FORGIVE HIM

- BECAUSE ALL I HAVE ARE MEMORIES AND I DONT WANT TO REMEMBER GLENN LIKE THAT SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UPPPPPP

- OMG A MEAL LIKE RICK’S DREAM SEQUENCE

- CAROL LAUGHING SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL 🫶🫶🫶

- omg negan giggling and blushing after daryl nodded to him

- YES A SAPPHIC COUPLE

- NO ROSITA PLEASE

- NOOOO ROSITA

- oh judith knows what’s up

- MY GIRLIES PLEASE 😭😭😭 THEY DONT DESERVE THIS IM SORRY ROSITA IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MEEEEE

- ARE YOU KIDDING ME PLEASE ROSITA YOU DIDNT DESERVE THIS

- THE SHOT OF HER SHAKING HAND WHEN GABE GRABBED COCO THIS SHOW IS SICK AND TWISTED

- TIMESKIP

- omg he named his kid after risita

- EZEKIEL IS THE GOVERNER SLAYYYYYY

- MICHAEL MERCER LOOKS SO HAPPY PLEASE THIS IS SO CUTE

- CONNIE AND DARYL ARE SO CUTE

- STOP WAIT JUDITH R U KIDDING ME NO WAY

- fuck its negan nvm i thought it was rick whatever

- CAROL SHORT HAIR AGAIN IM IN LOVE

- EVERYONE LOOKS SO HAPPY SHUT UPPPPP

- carol is so gorgeous beautiful and show-stopping im gonna cry

- omg maggie sent daryl to france

- STOP STARING AT HER LIKE THAT IF YOURE NOT GONNA KISS HER DARYL

- I WISH YOU WERE COMING WITH ME

- SHUT UP??? THIS IS??

- no i can FEEL this sadness shut up

- STOPPPPP

- JUST KISS GUYS

- JUST KISS

- STOPPPP THE CUDDLE BY THE LAKE???

- A HAPPY ENDING WITH CAROL SHUT UP GUYS

- THE FUCKING I LOVE YOU NO FUCKING WAY

- THE WAY HE LEANT INTO THE KISS

- THEY SAID I LOVE YOU

- HE CANT STOP STARING THIS IS CRAZY

- WHAT WE COULD HAVE HAD WHAT WE COULD HAVE HAD WHAT WE COULD HAVE HAD 😭😭😭😭

- THEY SAID I LOVE YOU TO EACH OTHER

- RICK AND MICHONNE SHUT UP

- RICK GRIMES RICK GRIMES MICHONNE GRIMES MICHONNE GRIMES

- HERSHELLLLL

- michonne hello??? she looks so??? good???

- RICK GRIMES PUT THOSE DOGS AWAY

- CALLBACK TO HER INTRO

- LEAVE RICK ALONE LEAVE HIM ALONE HES GOT PLACES TO BE

- WE’RE THE ONES WHO LIVE

- leave him alone 😭😭😭

- that was crazy i cant believe it’s over (i will not be watching the daryl spinoff)

- maggie looks so good in dead city????

- i have now fallen back in love w the walking dead this is the best show ever

[cheemken]

I highly doubt Iris wants to fight the other Champions, at least not at first because they’re her family. But if another region is in danger and the current champion needs help or they can’t/won’t protect the people of their region, then they have to step in to take down the person causing the danger

Even if that person is their little sister/daughter

Idk when the Champions show up after watching the live, but they show up ready to protect the people of Unova

And OUUGH they’re all devastated. Devastated that they couldn’t see the signs, that they listened to Iris when she said she could handle Team Plasma, that if they had helped Iris more when the words got to much for her to handle, she might not have turned out like this. But they know their jobs as Champions, and what to do to protect Unova

I imagine they’re trying to reason with Iris. To convince her to peacefully renounce her tittle as Ruler of Unova, and to turn herself in. That when she became Champion she took an oath to protect Unova and the people living there, so if she wants to fulfil her duties faithfully then she’d do just that. And Iris asking why she’d protect a region full of people who take and never give back? They always demanded more from her but never showed their appreciation towards her actions

Ckskcksjdks just Lance stepping forward to tell Iris that he’s seen people who’ve let power get to their head, and how it always leads to a terrible path. That he can’t bear to see the same happen to his daughter her. And o u g h Iris asking Lance if he thinks her fate is set in stone, that she’ll end up dying just like the rest of the people he’s seen. And when he doesn’t answer she reveals to the others that she won’t ever die, because it’s her Fate to rule over Unova, to rule over other regions. Because she’s The Hero of Fate, she decides the fate of those who bring harm to her. She was the one person who was chosen by Kyurem

Chosen to be a God, chosen to be The God of Fate

How can I fucking write my essay now with this in mind holy shit😭😭 that's so fucking dope😭

OUUGGGHHHH THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT CJDNDBS OF THAT THING W DABI AGAIN HAHAH

Like, Dabi's dance, God imagine if that's how the reveal went tho OUGH SHIT NOW IM REELING IMAGINE THATS HOW THE REVEAL WENT CJKDBDJD

But ough Iris is fucking vibing, she's like losing her mind, she's there looking down on the champions from the frigate, she's laughing like crazy, swaying here and there like she's dancing, going on how she knows better now, knows to not let the people of Unova step all over her again, knows that she's powerful, of course she was, she's a god

And god just jcmdnd Lance hearing it first hand now tho, hearing what was bothering her, hearing at how poorly the Unovan people treated his daughter, how he never made an effort to reach out to her. But he tried, he really tried, but he should've tried harder. He could hear Diantha now, her voice wavering w each word, calling out for Iris, almost pleading for their daughter to hear them, crying out their apologies, her hands were trembling.

Lance was looking back up at Iris, watching puffs of smoke leave her lips with each breath. Those eyes were staring at them, it petrified them, they two of them just stood there as Iris was grinning at them, a low chuckle left her lips. Her eyes looked manic, her grin was wide, she was laughing at them, going on how they already tried, and they already failed, and they're too late

"you honestly think I'd go back to that life?!" She laughed, swaying a bit as she stretched out her arms, "they finally know what it feels like! They finally know the pain! And you want me to go back to those days they'd run me ragged and complain about everything I do?!"

Diantha and Lance could only look at her, fear taking over their bodies, they couldn't move. They could hear the other Champions telling them to snap out of it, to move, to do something, but god they can't, they fucking can't, they could only watch their daughter from the frigate looking down on them with a crazed look in her eyes.

Iris laughed, a broken thing, almost choking out, "if I'm going to hell, then why won't you join me! You two will join me, right?! Mom! Dad! Why don't you join your daughter in hell!" She snapped her fingers, Kyurem appeared, "if you won't, then share their fate!" She pointed towards them, w Kyurem readying Glaciate, and Lance and Diantha are there, petrified still, watching as Iris' eyes glowed amidst the cold mist.

[bellamyblakru]

omg ok so idk how many im allowed to ask for the otp ask game thingy BUT if this is too many just do the ones you really want:D (SORRY I GOT EXCITED)

merthur & 2, 6, 7, 13, 24, 29, 30

oh my god roya i went ham on these. i apologize in advance 💀i got so excited too siskksksksks thank you so much for this holy shit, it was literally so much fun

2. Big spoon/Little spoon?

omg i think it depends on who got the drama arc that day ajclajfefkafn i would say normally merlin is 100% the big spoon LOL he just has that “need to comfort and protect” vibe, you feel?

6. What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

oooo so interesting, like physical features? id wanna say merlin loves arthur’s hands the most. like he can just sit for hours watching arthur signing documents and writing speeches and all that shit, plus arthur is definitely a hands on man (since he was touched starved to the max) so merlin always craves those little moments where arthur’s hand lingers on his own, or on his neck, or on his chest. the first thing to come to my mind for arthur is that he absolutely adores merlin’s hair. like when he forgets to cut it short and it gets a bit longer and more curly, the wildness just fits merlin so nicely. his hair in the morning is just so messy and perfect and the way the light hits it makes merlin feel more ethereal--its in those moments, right before merlin wakes up, where arthur just stares at this magical king and wonders what god he should thank for giving him someone so lovely.

7. What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

OH GOD. dude, the first thing that changes for merlin is what he thinks about as he helps arthur dress for the day. now, he notices the subtle way arthur leans into his touch, the way arthur smiles softly when merlin fixes his collar, the way his own hands tremble, ever-so slightly, as he smooths out arthur’s shirt. ARTHUR. man, the first thing that changes for arthur when he realized he has feelings for merlin is EVERYTHING. my mans tries to not change a fucking thing about the routine or day--but he tries way too fucking hard and its painfully noticeable that something is happening in his mind. merlin notices it, of course, but thinks arthur is stressed about something kingly. you know who tells him to fucking stop? LANCELOT. that man walks up to arthur, drags his ass aside, and gently, but not weakly, says “you suck at this” and helps him understand that merlin is already head over heels for him wjsjjsksksks

13. Who reaches for the other’s hand first?

arthur. 100%. touch is his thingggg™️. merlin has probably ached to hold arthur’s hand for years, but arthur does it first. i imagine two different scenarios: one, its fucking chaos out. there is some bad guy or some shit they are fighting, the knights are scattered, they are bloodied, bruised, and tired, but merlin hasn’t left his side for even a moment. the warlock’s back is still straight, his chin is still high, the defiance burning so brightly in those eyes that arthur cant help but reach over and grab the man’s hand to try to gain some of his resilience and passion and strength. two, it could be the laziest fucking day of the year. the knights of the roundtable are laughing and eating in arthur’s chambers, lance and gwen are making doe-eyes at one another, gwaine and percy are stealin little glances, and arthur is just so fucking content. like he looks around to smiles, and laughing, and happiness, and he turns his head to see merlin staring at him in concern. and he cant help it, man, he just reaches over and squeezes his hand. merlin’s eyes widen, but a soft smile grows there. arthur just doesn’t let go though, so merlin leans over and puts his head on arthur’s shoulder being completely beautifully content together.

24. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear during inappropriate times?

BRUH THIS SCREAMS MERLIN. I'M LAUGHING SO MUCH FKHNNSKNR. dudee. imagine it?? they are seated at a Very Important Dinner™️ with some Very Important People™️ and arthur is just about to make a toast and BAM-merlin whispers something outrageously fucking dirty. ARTHUR SPLUTTERS AND TURNS SO FUCKING RED ASDFGHHJK. merlin just smiles (his most regal smile) and turns away to talk to Very Important Someone™️ and arthur has to wait a few more minutes to compose himself and vows to get back at merlin later (he never does because merlin always beats him to it). OR LIKE DURING AUDIENCES? like this fucking farmer is complaining that he thinks his neighbor stole his chicken named Clucky and merlin just walks up to arthur and Says Something™️ that makes arthur cough...violently...and merlin turns around, solves the farmer’s problem, and goes back to his spot like nothing happened. arthur stares at him for much longer than he is suppose to before leon steps in and taps arthur’s shoulder to continue LOLLL

29. one headcanon about this OTP that breaks your heart

oh lord,,, where to start? im not sure if this is a common headcanon or not, but that merlin actually could have saved arthur. he is the most powerful warlock to ever fucking exist, and he couldn’t save him? i call bullshit. i think he had the power to, and i think deep down he realizes that when its too late (like arthur’s eyes fluttering shut too late) and thats what breaks him. what haunts him for literal centuries. the simple fact that he could have saved him. i think he didn’t know enough about his magic yet, or that he refused to acknowledge that kind of power simmering under his skin, or that he just didn’t believe enough in himself because of how many times shit had hit the fan when merlin did magic near arthur. so..yeah…yikes

30. one headcanon about this OTP that mends it

LOL im full of angsty headcanons so hmmm. during arthur’s reign, they used to stay up late at night in arthur’s chambers. it didn’t matter what they did: whether it was arthur teaching merlin how to play chess as merlin complained the entire time that strategy at midnight was a cruel and unnecessary punishment, or arthur helped merlin clean his chambers as merlin hummed an old song his mother used to sing to him before bed, or just the two of them sitting in front of the fireplace with two glasses of wine talking about everything and nothing all at once. but once the quiet hits, its never, ever, uncomfortable. they can sit in silence for hours and never be bored or scared to break it. they just sit there, side by side, leaning on one another like they do in everything in life.

thank you again😭💖💖 akakakakak i might have gotten too excited?😂

otp ask game

[paintedwarpony]

C2E123 HIGHLIGHTS OF THE NIGHT

Nathaniel Nat20: Dodeca Heal Yourself

Marisha saying right away that she hates Nathaniel Nat20

"Just the appearance... for now."

Veth immediately resolving to use acid to solve the problem

Yasha JUMPING to stop Beau from letting herself be burned with acid

Travis: THAT WAS THE BIG FIX THAT WE HAD AND IT DIDN'T WORK

Aliooping acid

Matt: YOU SHOULD PROBABLY BE CARRYING AROUND A BASE IF YOU'RE CARRYING AROUND ACIDS

Midnight waffles

So much Travis

Exhaustion Point Gimme on Beau

"Its not a Wish..."

Yasha suggesting everyone of the Nein read the book 'a little bit'

*Om nom nom nom

Rolling an 8 on a d8

*D R A G O N

THE DRAGON BEING FUCKING GELIDON

The cataclysm bolt being a "ice arrow" on a white dragon

Travis vibing, just living his best life

Re-emergence of the Fastball Special

Dry Fart Battlecry

Re-emergence of Pathfinder rules

*NO MIND WHAMMIES FOR YASHA

Lucien legendary actions

SMITE

The awesome strategy work of the Nein as a team supporting each other

Lone mini camera angle shot

Meta Pigeon conversion

"I only have a ring of FIRE RESISTANCE!!!"

*New Spell: HARM

"From my angle your dice are very sparkly."

Mustach Shaming

"ARE YOU WATCHING YASHA?!"

"I'm a one wolf wolf pack"

The cast making their own music when it crashed

Otis and Veth fighting over hiding behind Fjord and ending up stacking on top of each other

*Jester casting HEAL on Fjord

Gelidon fleeing but the Nein STILL fight chasing her

Yasha’s lance

Comedic timing on Beau getting smacked with the tail

Snow angel landing

Fjord's little public kiss plus Jester’s and Veth chat: "That was the first time..."

Curtain of fire so Jester can 'pee', then Sending while actually peeing.

Roll for bags

*Tiger Blood gift from Veth resulting in a Matt Mercer gigglefit

Dagen headed off to meet Essek

Mind Palace Forest

Essek = Distant twinkling star of safety and familiarity WILDMOM APPROVED

Double Commune

ARTIE!!! All that sass and beautifully, perfectly useless

Laura's dinosaur sweater and Marisha assuming the chair perched pose

FRUMPKIN'S MISSION IMPOSSIBLE

THEY MIGHTY NEINED US

Stealth Team Owls GO

Clutch Caduceus perception with Beau’s goggles

Cool Monk Shit

Zorgon

Taliesin arguing about Lucien's bloodhunter abilities

*Owl!Yasha diving and saving Beau right out of Lucien's literal grip

'Arms of the Angels' sung for the second time

Lucien vs Caduceus

Matt freaking out over how much damage Lucien did or could have done to Caduceus: Shit got real after that

Stress Level Midnight on the party and cast during the standoff

Referencing Campaign One in a time of severe stress: Raishan Fight after Thordak Fight when most of Vox Machina was Level 16 and two characters were killed

Referencing the Home Game in a time of severe stress

F U B A R (for those who are unfamiliar FUBAR is an anagram that stands for 'Fucked Up Beyond All Reason')

Being able to tell how stressful the situation is by how hard the cast gets on hammering the rules and strategy

"Thats Matt being worried for us as friends..."

YASHA’S CLUTCH WING BAMF

Veth's Phantasmal Force spell and Caduceus' Shield of Retribution

"We're together now. No matter what happens at least we're together."

Matt's "Oh God" whenever he knocks over a mini

COUNTERSPELL COUNTERSPELL COUNTERSPELL

Mammoth Owl Halfling Padlock mad dash retreat

The anti-magic cone barely hitting the mammoth's butt

Major Image Gelidon

The whole party's new hatred for Otis

"Twig boy in a barbarian's arms..."

THEY LIVED

*Empire Kids managed to keep their aquired Eyes secret from Lucien

NUMBER CHECKED OFF ON MANIFEST LIST: 6.5

I'm only gonna count the breakfast 'Om nom noms' as a half cause it wasn't described what was for breakfast beyond the waffles

Jester casting HEAL on Fjord and Owl!Yasha saving Beau both count towards ship partners protecting each other in battle

I called that fucking dragon. But I pretty much have had dragon on the manifest list for awhile...

HARM is technically a 6th level spell but it can be cast as a 7th so I'm counting it.

Holy heck what an episode. . .

. . .

Hey. . . hey you guys. . . Guess where we're going?

Vurmas Outpost

Dare I hope. . . Dare I dream. . .

[scatterpatter]

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

*VIBRATES* FIRST IMPRESSIONS ANALYSIS LETS G O

ARTHUR NOT DEAD ARTHUR NOT DEAD

LEWIS WAS GONNA SAVE ARTHUR BUT THANK U UNCLE LANCE FOR PROTECTING UR BOI

Lance: pew pew! Lewis: SO YOU HAVE CHOSEN DEATH

Real talk tho? The animation was masterful. Holy shit I wasn’t expecting to be so floored but the crew really outdid themselves again im- m u a h

POOR VIVI ;_;

VIVI MEETS HER ANCESTOR AND BORROWS HER POWERS HELL YEAH

LEWIS’ FACE WHEN ARTHUR PICKS UP HIS HEART AKJBSKBSFKBS

THE FACT THAT THE LOCKET CHANGES FROM JUST LEW AND VI TO THE FOUR OF THEM,,, SHOWING LEWIS CARED FOR ALL OF THEM,,, HHHNG

THE TAR TEARS!!!! MY EDGELORD HEART LIVES FOR THIS!!!

ARTHUR AND LEWIS BEING DISASTER NERDS WHILE SHIROMORI FUCKS SHIT UP... I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

LEWIS ACTUALLY FIGHTING THE VINES WHILE ARTHUR IS JUST TRYING TO CARRY LANCE AROUND IM SKFBDKJBFS

MYSTERY TRYING TO DEFEND SHIROMORI,,, ;_;

OH- Just realized on the second watch: When Vivi gets hurt, Mystery’s heart starts gushing that blue... hmmmmmmm... Can’t wait for the theorists to get their hands on this one >:3

SUPER VIVI

THE SINGLE TEAR SIGNIFYING SHIROMORI REGRETS HURTING MYSTERY,,,

Shiromori’s heart... 1: looks like a tree seed, nice. 2: looks like its an actual heart thats encased in something cold and exterior, maybe? Like frozen over almost? Encased in amber? Idk it looks something like that- 3: I MEAN THE HEART IS YEETED, NEVER DESTROYED, SHIROMORI CAN THEORETICALLY COME BACK

Till then can we get an F in the chat for plant lady

Going back to Shiro! That makes Mystery’s heart gush white... hmmm

POOR MYSTERY MAN ;_;

OH FUCK GREEN MYSTERY

POOR VI IS TRYING NOT TO DIE, LEW IS HAVING EMOTIONAL TURMOIL, ARTHUR IS JUST TRYING TO KEEP HIS ARM FROM SPAZZING, THESE POOR BEANS

THE WAY LEWIS AND ARTHUR BOTH RUSH TO HELP VIVI BUT ARTHUR’S ARM SPAZZES BEFORE HE CAN REACH THEM BOTH.... MY HEART

OH GOD ITS MORE LIKE SOME BLACK OPAL MYSTERY... TAR/OIL MYSTERY? ... I LIKE BLACK OPAL

MYSTERY’S HEART COLORS: YELLOW, ORANGE(Arthur?), WHITE(Shiro), BLACK, BLUE(Vivi), GREEN, PINK, PURPLE(Lewis?). THEORISTS, GO GET EM

THAT GREEN HANDED MOTHERFUCKER

We get our first voice acting and its Vivi: What the f- Arthur: *sCREAMS* AND TBH??? MOOD???

YALL I CANT,,, I CANT,,,

[cannotgiveafuck]

What would be the reactions to the heroes realizing they've probably said some inappropriate things to a ten year old? I know billy is not ten but he's so small.

Aahh I love these asks! Thanks so much!

Okay, after finally settling down from their initial shock and dismay that Captain Marvel is literally a Small Child, the reactions upon realizing that they have said some Unsavory and Inappropriate Things around/to him are:

1) “Oh sweet christmas, I am so sorry, my parents would wash my mouth with soap, please dont ever repeat what I said. I am going to try my darnest to be a very good role model” - Clark Kent, Barry Allen, Dick Grayson

2) “Holy shit, Ive said some fucked up shit, no wait crap, is crap okay? You probably know that one, sorry kid, wait can I call you kid when you’re Marvel? ah fuck” - Hal Jordan, Arthur Curry, Roy Harper, Oliver Queen

3) “Yeah, Ive said dumb shit, but honestly, you probably already knew all that or youre gonna learn it someday, might as well be from me” - John Constantine, Arthur Curry, Jason Todd

4) “I am very disappointed in everyone else’s behavior, including my own, you deserve so much better, please do not repeat what Hal or Arthur or Constantine say” - Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, John Stewart, Dinah Lance, Zatanna Zatara

5) “I realize you are a human child, however I dont understand the others reactions, as you are a very knowledgeable and dependable person and are a part of this team, wait what did they say to you?” - Diana Prince, J’onn J’onzz, Koriand’r, Shayera Hol

6) “I am not so much sorry that I tried to kill you, as I am so fucking furious at the Wizard and Gods for claiming another innocent soul, it is their fault, give me your powers immediately you small child” - Teth Adam

Thats all I got right, now but honestly yall feel free to add your own bc this is hilarious.