#holy shit are their contracts like. magically binding. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stealingyourbones · 2 years

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I posted 4,197 times in 2022

That's 4,179 more posts than 2021!

1,318 posts created (31%)

2,879 posts reblogged (69%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@stealingyourbones

@plotwholls

@bonebrokebuddy

@gilbirda

@edgemcjee

I tagged 3,528 of my posts in 2022

Only 16% of my posts had no tags

#danny phantom - 1,209 posts

#dp x dc - 1,171 posts

#dc comics - 1,065 posts

#writing prompts - 1,006 posts

#dpxdc - 920 posts

#dp x dc prompt - 810 posts

#and the thick plotens - 780 posts

#bones replies - 599 posts

#bones prompts - 491 posts

#dc - 309 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#the “’don’t u tell me u don’t know who i am’ ‘bro i literally have never seen you in my life’ interaction was almost exactly the emotions-

My Top Posts in 2022:

Concept that I feel hasn’t been tapped into with dp x dc:

John Constantine begrudgingly being pals with Danny Phantom. When Danny was just barley ghost king, John summons him in some way to loophole his way out of another deal with a different entity he’s made a contract with. Ya know, a good ol “I’ll sell my soul to multiple entities so they can’t claim my soul or else start a war fighting for it and instead make myself unable to die” for the nth time. Danny doesn’t accept because the concept of owning someone’s soul as unnerving and not morally correct but helps John in whatever situation is needed and John is just bamboozled because he didn’t need to con and loophole his way out of whatever situation he was in and this strange ghost boy is doing it willingly and only asks to stop for some fast food after the fight as payment.

This is the start of a whole bunch of wild circumstances that make John Constantine summon/meet up with phantom to fix some dark magic shenanigans because Danny is one hell of a powerful entity and he doesn’t worry about having to owe back Danny in favors or debts that are magically binding which is a really nice change of pace.

Personally I imagine the vibe that the fandom has decided John and Billy Batson dynamic is like: A Concerned and frankly pitiful attempt of a parental figure with a kid who’s powerful enough to end the world if they felt like it. Added onto that is John freaking out because ‘why did the universe give this freaking child so much power holy shit oh god this could end absolutely terribly what the hell do I do’

Just Constantine and Danny combatting and stopping demons and curses of the hellish variety and just slowly meeting the magic users of the Justice League before meeting everyone as a gradual set up of Constantine, Justice League member, & Danny, stopping smaller arcane based entities/artifacts from causing damage to the world. Ending in Danny meeting the entire Justice League and stopping an insane threat and letting everyone really know just how powerful he is.

OR Constantine calling Danny for some big scale Justice league issue and the magic users freaking the hell out because ‘how the hell does John fuckin Constantine have a leader of an entire dimension/realm in his back pocket for emergency contacts and why do they have a good relationship with eachother’ ?!

3,678 notes - Posted July 25, 2022

Submitted Prompts #5

After Danny became the Ghost King, the entire magic community learned that the King was available for summons again. Slight issue: Danny is different from the previous King. His summoning circle has completely different requirements that everyone is rushing to figure out for their own purpose.

3,848 notes - Posted November 26, 2022

So what if the “No metas in Gotham” thing scared Danny Fenton away from Gotham City?

What if Danny gets a grant or scholarship at Central City University?

What if Danny gets an internship job as an assistant Forensic Scientist at the Central City Police Department?

Ok so hear me out:

The Rouges in Central City are much more chill and jokey than most superhero protected cities and have a good relationship with The Flash and would remind Danny of Amnity in that sense.

Danny’s entire obsession with protection and also a likely mentality of “Police and law enforcement have been horrible to me in the past so I will do everything I can to make sure what happens to me happens to no one else” would make him strive to be an honest protector of the people. He could be a cop and Barry Allen works with him because he knows that Danny isn’t corrupt. A reverse Batman and Jim Gordon if you will. He could also be a Forensic Scientist that recently joined CCPD and Barry Allen is assigned to be his mentor to show him the ropes. Either way The Flash grows to respect and care for this really strange kid who’s eyes sometimes look green as a trick of the light.

Danny using his powers to help solve murders, crimes, and ghostly shenanigans in Central City by talking to the local paranormal entities and recently deceased and pretending that he just is really really good at his job (well he is, but he has a bit of ghostly help.)

The Flash and Kid Flash notice this strange white haired meta zipping around and go to meet him and find out that he’s roughly Wally’s age. The speed force feels a bit strange around this kid, Like he’s been a part of multiple time altering changes. He doesn’t seem malicious though and the kid is really funny so Barry is going to let this ghostly meta do his own thing.

Phantom and The Flash start teaming up. Having an extra person in a battle is always nice. The Flash also notices that this Phantom kid is always DELIGHTED to fight Captain Cold. What The Flash expected to be a long battle that would end in almost frostbite and a long night with little to no sleep ended up being a five minute excursion. The Phantom reveling in the low temperatures and freezing Captain Cold’s cold gun and feet with a more crystalline and shinier type of ice. Instantly ending the battle.

Phantom fights Abra Kadabra and loudly complains to Abra while fighting how stupid Abra’s gimmick is and that it doesn’t look like real magic.

Phantom helps dismantle Weather Wizards plan to blot out the sun by simply turning the giant storm clouds that the Wizard summoned into snow.

The Flash is completely dumbfounded when the Reverse Flash shows up at his work, taunts Barry Allen, when Phantom comes out of nowhere, possesses The Reverse Flash, who then asks the location of the nearest containment facility that’ll house a speedster. Danny/Reverse Flash proceeds to run himself to the location, lock himself in, and exit Thawne’s body. The amount of awe Barry feels can’t even be put to words. Barry Allen’s arch nemesis. Defeated by a ghostly kid who has bi weekly hangouts with his nephew to binge watch D-list horror movies. What the fuck.

Danny has a great relationship with Barry. The two quickly bond over being quippy and aren’t annoyed when the other is consistently late to every possible meet up. Danny is incredibly dexterous and knows his way around the lab and Barry is happy to chat with someone who happily will talk back and ramble on about their life and has a genuine want to help others.

If Barry asks Batman on tips with how to take care of an overworked and constantly exhausted kid that’s between him and the Bat.

Barry mentally adopts this strange coworker and if he spotted the kid behind the CCPD building turning into Phantom? That’s none of his business and for Danny to reveal to him on his own time.

3,898 notes - Posted July 27, 2022

I saw one of your Short DPXDC Prompts and was inspired by this….

I understand that cloning a Kryptonian was not easy for Luthor's people, so they added human DNA…

but I remember that it has been mentioned in some places that treatments/conditions are needed to mix the DNA of the two species and that they are mostly only accessible in Superman's fortress…

So I got to this madness… Somehow, (possibly GIW or even Vlad) Danny's ectoplasm gets to Luthor Corp. and some scientist had the bright idea to use it as a stabilizer, it wasn't enough to stabilize a Kryptonian Clone, but for a Human/Kryptonian hybrid. ..

And of course, nobody knew that said chemical substance was DNA of the new King of the Infinite Realms…

Mikami your MIND-

This is just beautiful. What would that make Connor? 1/4 ghost? 1/8th ghost? Idk but using halfa DNA to bind the two different species DNA together is SO GOOD dude.

Looks like Connor has another Dad and he’ll do anything to find him and get some answers

4,494 notes - Posted October 12, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Danny is walking along in Gotham and trips and falls into a massive puddle. Instead of making a splash or hitting the cold wet floor, he simply goes through the ground and turns invisible as he falls.

Now imagine you are a Gotham vigilante just chilling on the rooftops and you see this scrawny ass black haired kid just eat shit and fall face first toward a puddle and just sink into the puddle with barley even a ripple. Completely vanishing from sight. The bafflement and chaos that would ensue from that… truly marvelous.

5,498 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Bones speaks #ey yo look cool demographics :)

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kromlock · 2 years

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A transcript of my relationship with JK Rowling

Joanne: Hey kid, would you like a decent children’s book? It’s a little dark but it’s also a fun quirky story about a magic school.

Me: Oh hey, I like lots of those things! Hey, this is pretty good for the stuff that’s usually aimed at my age group!

Joanne: Yes, cool. Here’s a sequel. It’s foreshadowing some political intrigue and has a gut wrenching portrayal of the horrors of slavery, but I swear it’s still for kids.

Me: Oh wow, this is even better than the first! Hey, you’re a pretty good mystery writer too.

Joanne: Why, thank you! Now this next one gives Harry some deep backstory.

Me: Wow, I love this! You did a great job shattering the illusion that James was such a great guy!

Joanne: I beg your pardon?

Me: Well, I mean, you kind of outed James as the bully, and like even though it doesn’t excuse his behavior at all, Snape was right about Harry’s dad.

Joanne: ……huh.

Me: And I loved the disability rights theme so much I didn’t notice the part where the central character in the disability metaphor then turns his condition into a deadly liability in a boarding school. Or the skin crawling ideological implications of that.

Joanne: Hold on a second. I have to do something.

Me: What’s up?

Joanne: Just jotting down notes. Snape…. Was… Right….

Me: Well I didn’t mean it like THAT…

Joanne: Skin crawling… ideological…. Implications…. Okay, all done. By the way, here’s an extra long book!

Me: WHOA HOLY HELL does the shit hit the fan here! The bad guy’s back in action, the government is Fucking Horrible, and the Avengers are assembling. And that gleam of triumph in Dumbledore’s eye! I bet you’re going somewhere great with that! God I can’t wait to find out what happens next. It’s just… umm… a couple things.

Joanne: Yeah?

Me: Why did it have to be so long? And I like plot twists and all but this was just weird and convoluted.

Joanne: No, but you see, more is better.

Me: Huh. I guess I see your reasoning there. But another thing I just realized. This is a bad school.

Joanne: Excuse me?

Me: It’s a death trap and the faculty is incompetent.

Joanne: Dumbledore is a legendary sorcerer, philosopher, and warrior!

Me: But that doesn’t make him a good teacher! That’s a completely different skillset!

Joanne: And about the death trap! That’s because of Voldemort. He does evil things.

Me: Voldemort didn’t resurrect an ancient blood sport for children. The first event was throwing teenagers one by one into an arena with a pissed off dragon to just see what happens.

Joanne: They were all supposed to be of age, and the binding magic contract-

Me: They couldn’t just rewrite the contract? Do they have to use the exact same cursed artifact that they used thousands of years ago, with the only guard around it having easy exploits?

Joanne: ….

Me: Come to think of it, the other books were pretty fucked up too. It’s quicker to list the school years where someone doesn’t die on campus.

Joanne: I-

Me: And I don't mean "Old Professor Giddyfart passed away in his sleep last night. He was 239 years young." I mean "Our star pupil was murdered in cold blood by Wizard Hitler during our international child bloodsport tournament."

Joanne: Technically that was off-campus.

Me: "Last year our students almost had their souls stolen by undead horrors that were posted here -at a fucking school- because that’s a good idea. This was minutes after almost being mauled by our werewolf on staff."

Joanne: They were only there because they thought a convicted-

Me: "Oh, that was also the same day we had a former Nazi combatant come to lop off the head of a hippogriff who actually did maul another student for the dreadful crime of not paying attention in class.”

Joanne:

Me: "Oh and the year before it turned out we just kinda had a basilisk in the plumbing and it kept turning students to stone, it was really annoying, totally disrupted the curriculum”

Joanne: But that was because-

Me: "Oh and the year before that one of our teachers was possessed by the still-living shade of Wizard Hitler. He set a troll loose in the school to try and steal our Bring-Shades-Back-To-Life Macguffin. We just figured it was the safest place because our unhinged headmaster is fucking Hercules, Perseus, and Theseus rolled into one. He could've taken a sabbatical to guard it without putting children in harm’s way, but he's just that quirky!"

Joanne: Well, perhaps Dumbledore isn’t all perfect-

Me: "What's that? Oh yeah, it's guarded by goddamn Cerberus, and a series of challenges even more dangerous than goddamn Cerberus. But don't worry, we sealed the door with a spell that a first year student can unlock."

Joanne: What are you getting at?

Me: Where’s the lawsuits? Absolutely nothing was done to rein Dumbledore in. Well, except for once and it was the one time the danger wasn’t his fault and it was at the behest of the bad guys and swiftly overturned.

Joanne: Government regulation?

Me: And what the fuck was with that “Hermione is an idiot for being against slavery” thing? That made me feel icky.

Joanne: Well, I will be right back!

Me: Oh, okay.

Me: Maybe that was a bit rude. Every story has its flaws.

Me: ….

Me: Wow, Lord of the Rings is really good.

Joanne: Here’s book 5! Harry Potter and the Reason Government Regulation Is Bad

Me: Uh… this is quite a bit longer than the last one.

Joanne: Yes.

Me: The one that I thought was way longer than it had to be.

Joanne: Yes.

Me: And I just read it, and like nothing happened in it. You took the shortest story so far and padded it out with a weird political manifesto.

Joanne: More is bette-

Me: And it’s not even good politics! Anyone but the most Randian hardcore libertarian would want to do something when a school actively contributes to the death of a student.

Joanne: Yeah but the person doing it is juuuuuust a fucking cunt.

Me: I mean, yeah I have to admit she was a pretty good villain. Kinda overshadows Voldemort though, you should really step up the menace in your main antagonist because all he’s done so far is get his ass kicked by a bunch of high school students.

Joanne: Ohhhh just you wait. Okay I’ll be right back.

Me: Oh, okay.

Me: I think we really connected that time.

Me: …..

Me: Huh, Revenge of the Sith was pretty good actually.

Joanne: Okay, this one is all about Voldemort. Also I heard you like Lord of the Rings, so you’re in for some good stuff!

Me: Do tell!

Joanne: So the One Ring was cool right?

Me: Oh yeah, it’s menacing as hell.

Joanne: Well Voldemort made SEVEN One Rings! You can One Ringify any object in this universe.

Me: …please tell me you gave it a name other than One Ring.

Joanne: I sure did! It’s called a Horcrux.

Me: ….Horcrux.

Joanne: You got it!

Me: …….so you can turn anything into a One Ring?

Joanne: You bet! And that diary from book 2 was a One Ring.

Me: Hey that’s a pretty cool retcon.

Joanne: Or maybe… I had it planned all along.

Me: No you didn’t.

Joanne: And just you wait, I have a big twist on those things coming in the next-

Me: It’s that Harry’s scar is a One Ring.

Joanne: …

Me: What? It’s kind of obvious.

Joanne: ….anyway they’re being super careful to make the school safe now so YOU’RE WELCOME. Plot hole fixed.

Me: This book ends with a bunch of Wizard Nazis infiltrating the school, assassinating the headmaster, spray painting a Wizard Swastika in the sky, trashing the place, and just walking out. So yeah, pretty safe. You know what, screw it. The movies are pretty good so I’ve tricked myself into still liking this shit. Hey, if you keep up your writing pace then Harry’s gonna graduate the same year I do! You gonna have the grand finale out in time?

Joanne: I sure am! Here it is, it’s more than worth the wait.

Me: WHOA now this is more like it! The last book was kind of a mess, but this? I love the dystopian setting and the breaking of the formula, and the moral complexity of Dumbledore, and you even managed to do some cool stuff with that Horcrux shit. And ohhh, the schoolgrounds are an actual castle so of course that’s where the final battle takes place, and it’s still fucked up that this is a school but that’s also pretty cool. And here’s the final confrontation, aaaaand…..

Joanne: And? And?

Me: …..what the hell was that ending?

Joanne: Excuse me?

Me: The bad guy dies on a weird wand ownership technicality? Not a whisper about freeing the slaves or undoing any of the other heinous shit the government does and permits? Harry names his son after the greasy incel who blew it with his mom when he shouted slurs at her and never got over it?

Joanne: Severus is a tragic figure who never stopped caring about the woman he loved!

Me: He held on to a creepy obsession with the idea of her while devoting his professional life to tormenting her surviving loved ones.

Joanne: He had to keep up appearances to fool Voldemort.

Me: He tried to poison a sensitive awkward child’s pet in front of his class, just because he could! Well before he was a blip on Voldemort’s radar! You know what, the movies have been doing a pretty good job cleaning up this mess so far, so I guess your job’s done. Oh, one more thing. I still don’t know what the hell was up with that gleam of triumph in Dumbledore’s eye?

Joanne: Oh, that’s a thing to do with his blood and Lily’s protection and the power of love and-

Me: You didn’t have anything planned, got it.

Joanne: Well, I never! I bid you farewell! And by the way, you were wrong! Harry’s scar wasn’t a One Ring! Harry’s SOUL was a One Ring!

Me: …okay, bye

Me: Say, the movies really did clean up that bullshit. You know, I think the series was pretty good after all.

Me: ……

Me: Well the new God of War was a pleasant surprise-

Joanne: BACK BEFORE PLUMBING WIZARDS SHIT THEMSELVES!

Me: Uh, what?

Joanne: THE AMERICAN TERM FOR MUGGLE IS “NO-MAJ”

Me: Is this a troll account?

Joanne: DID I MENTION TRANS PEOPLE ARE A BLIGHT?

Me: Oh no, this is just awful. Please stop tarnishing your weirdly good reputation.

Joanne: I WILL NOT BE SILENCED! MY NEW BOOK IS ABOUT HOW INTERNET TROLLS ARE BEING MEAN TO MEEEEE

Me: You know, maybe I can do without Harry Potter in my life.

Joanne: I’M BEING CANCELLEEEEEEDD

#harry potter #trans rights #literature

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ironwoodwizard · 1 year

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Name: Ezra Cagney

Age: eternally 22 (actually from some sort of age of arcane prevalence, so who knows what his age is!)

Gender: Cis Male

Sexuality: Gay

Race: Tiefling (formerly human)

Appearance: fluffy red/ginger hair, hazel/yellow eyes, freckles, pretty face, slim build, dark red horns and tail hidden by a glamour.

Voice: light low tenor, has gotten good at mimicking a Texan accent; he could be mistaken for a native if not for the slight Irish lilt that comes out every so often. Most people just assume that the Texan accent is his natural one, and that the Irish one is just the nervous tick of a theater kid. He has a fair singing voice, though he usually only shows it off after a few drinks at karaoke night. His go-to songs are usually either punk rock or southern rock, occasionally classic rock, folk, or country.

FC: Trevor Stines

Personality: Charming, sweet, lonely, helpful, peacekeeper, honestly trying his best, seems shady at first but he’s really not, anxious and hiding it, seems confident but is actually awkward as all heaven and hell, loves a good stupid/ironic joke, dramatic as fuck, just charismatic enough to out-talk a devil without totally losing his shit, highly intelligent and nerdy, very intuitive, a bit of a show-off.

Powers/Abilities: functional immortality, fire magic, fire resistance, glamour, expert mixologist, alchemist, potion brewer.

Flaws/Weaknesses: hubris, holy water, extreme cold, binding contracts, lavender (he’s allergic, breaks out in hives), nearsighted

Nationality: ….American (for now), Irish (originally)

Languages: Too many to count

Education: An insanely long lifetime of various studies.

Style: dapper yet casual. Usually wears a black button down shirt, red vest, and black slacks. Red tie or jeweled bolo if he’s going to a meeting or event of any kind. He often dresses up for theme nights at the tavern, though he always manages to look as classy as possible. Wears black rectangular glasses, and a silver ring in each ear.

Profession: bartender (current), alchemist (former, recently started again), wizard (former, still dabbles), co-owner of the Heavenly Fire Tavern & Grill.

Family: long gone, unless found family counts

Backstory: Ezra has been in Morningstar for at least a couple of decades, probably closer to three. It’s both a haven and a prison for him, though far more so the former. He’d spent centuries on the run, doing whatever good deeds he could along the way, but when he finally found a small town that seemed to be just as weird as he was, he jumped at the chance to settle down for a while. It wasn’t easy. Between the prickly locals and the deal that he’d made for immortality, which he was nearly in breach of, Ezra quickly became overwhelmed. He bounced back, though, opening a tavern with the help of a friendly local mechanic through which he could continue his eternity of servitude in peace. Until, of course, he figured out that he could no longer leave Morningstar. The contract between him and the mechanic had accidentally bound him to remain in town for as long as it remained in effect, and while that did have its drawbacks, he honestly didn’t mind. The devil he’d (mostly) outsmarted so long ago could hardly reach him, and he had a safe place to call home where no one minded the fact that he never aged. Things were great! Aside from the local Chamber of Commerce being mostly full of catty and conniving assholes, Ezra could finally take it easy. Twenty years of peace. Twenty years of finally feeling like he could belong, of having a friend who felt more like a brother, and of prospering like he never had before.

When the old mechanic died, it shattered Ezra to his core. He didn’t open up the tavern for nearly a week, and only left his home to attend the funeral, where he met the mechanic’s grandson, Oleander, formally for the first time. He put on a brave face, much like the one the boy and his widowed grandmother wore, kept his introductions brief, and paid his respects. After the funeral, Ezra’s life became a little more bearable; he reopened the tavern and went about his days as he usually would, though he dreaded the next CoC meeting. It would be quite lonely and anxiety inducing to try and keep the peace on his own. When it finally rolled around Ez was a nervous wreck, but he was pleasantly shocked to see that Ollie had showed up in his grandfather’s stead.

Good.

They needed to talk if Oleander had truly inherited both family businesses, and the meeting would be a good icebreaker. He hoped. Ezra was quick to lay on the charm, introducing Ollie to the other members and trying his best to keep the wolves at bay. Despite his efforts, Ollie remained leery of him and the rest of the Chamber. It took longer than he’d hoped to earn just a little bit of the boy’s trust, even that was only gained because Ezra became a target for attempted murder and came to Ollie for help. He would never forget the look on the boy’s face upon seeing the fresh holy water burns, or the conversation they had as Grandma Rose patched him up.

Their friendship was soon forged in chaos and mutual aid, as they came together to root out and defeat the so-called monster hunters, and solidified when Ollie agreed to renew his grandfather’s contract for co-ownership of the tavern. It wasn’t long before the pair became well known for their arcane prowess. Townsfolk began coming to them for spells and potions, wards and talismans. It was practically something out of a fantasy novel, as if Ezra’s life hadn’t reflected one before.

#🔧 out of spells 🔧 ooc talk #🍷 alchemist and mixologist 🍷 about #🍷 if heaven and hell decide 🍷 aesthetic

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iamcrimelord · 1 year

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Story Time: Shadows of the Collective.

Daigo made his way down the street. It was nighttime in the Abyss and Daigo had just spent an eventful evening wining and dining with the demons down here, watching the clever ones try to trap him in snares and contracts while the more combative ones tried to pick a fight with him. All in all a rather standard night or day really. The air was certainly cool from the dark sea that surrounded the domain he was in now but there were gently wisps of heat that would caress his face every so often from the fires and torches down here. As he walked down the street, he heard someone step out from a corner behind him. "Excuse me sir... Might you be Mr. Belfir?"

Daigo turned to see who was addressing him. Before him was what appeared to be some sort of cleric. Dressed in red and black carrying a symbol of Iomedae. Daigo could not help but chuckle at the sight, being in the abyss as he was. "Something I can do to help you good father?"

The cleric smiled, though it did not touch his eyes, shook his head and stepped out further into the torch light. "No my son. I've come to help you." He said with a very pious and condescending tone.

Daigo knew where this was going and chuckled softly. Gently resting his hand on the medallion he kept on his belt. "Mmm. very generous considering I dont donate to any churches of Iomedae."

The cleric procured a holy knife from his robe and behind him four paladins emerged, all clad in armor showing their alliegance to Iomedae. "Oh I think you know very well what kind of help I'm bringing. We are here to destroy you once and for all, reclaim the heart of the herald that now beats in your breast and at last send you to Pharasma to answer for your crimes." He then gave Daigo a smile that oozed with arrogance and moral superiority.

Daigo cracked his knuckles and then took the medallion off his belt. "Before you do... might I ask how you found me?"

The cleric nodded his head towards him. "The collective made it very clear that you were forbidden to ever enter our lands again. In fact they are forbidden to even speak your name."

Daigo chuckled. "So I am 'He-who-must-not-be-named' eh? I have to admit I must have clearly scared the shit out of Tarek and his goonies for them to taboo me like they did."

The cleric scoffed. "It was for your crimes that you were struck from their records. It is disgust, not fear that stills their tongues."

Daigo gave a smile only a viper could. "Mmm. Well they all wanted me dead so I suppose sugar coating their own crimes to make me look more the villain is to be expected. But here's the real question, I've heard that little toad Lawyer of theirs is ten times the scum I ever was, yet he's still there....in fact he's one of their captains now if I'm not mistaken.... why haven't they nailed him to a tree and left him to die?"

The cleric's face sneered. "Judge not lest ye be judged."

Daigo scoffed at that. "Oh....I judge. Just like they all judged me without ever hearing my side of the story. But I guess when someone like Tarek is surrounded by sycophants more occupied with status than doing the right thing its to be expected. Does that man even realize what a monster he's made?"

The cleric slashed his hand across the air. "SILENCE. You will not speak ill of our founder! It's time to die!!"

The Paladins behind him were armed with special crossbows enchanted to fire magic missiles than crossbow bolts. Daigo quickly tapped into his pyromancy and engaged them in battle.

Daigo dashed to the side as the bolts shot past him. He used the spell burning hands to send out a blast of fire that scorched the group of five before him. The cleric caught fire with his robes but used magic to put them out quickly. The Paladins armor was hot, but blessings kept the damage to a minimum. The cleric cast binding chains on Daigo to hold him in place, the paladins fired again and the shots tore through his shoulders. Daigo roared in pain and used Banshee scream to stun them with fear for a moment. As he was bound he reached for a coin in his pocket and summoned his four phantom elf warriors with the Elven Ferryman's coin. They rushed forward to engage with the paladins who drew short swords to deal with these new threats in melee. Daigo quickly broke free of the chains and then pulled out his two guns and proceeded to shoot all four of them in the head. They fell to their knees and then onto their face. The cleric was then bound by the elf phantoms by holding his hands behind his back with the other two holding their swords to his neck. Daigo was panting a little, but he took out a comb, smoothed down his hair, and then walked over to the little man. "Now then, I will not hold this against Tarek. My opinion of the man is not great but I told him once years ago that I was going to bury the hatchet. And bury it I did. Now, my guess is, he doesn't know you lot came down here. in fact I don't think you're even members of the collective just a couple of clowns who were either trying to get into his good graces or were wanting to make a name for yourself.... or maybe....it was that little piece of shit lawyer..?"

The cleric swallowed and his eyes widened. Daigo smiled. "Oh it was...mm. See that creepy little frog came to my office once a long time ago, and thinking he was some sort of comedian, made some very rude comments. Now.....I will give you this message, and you will take it back to him. If he ever, EVER, comes near me again...I will bring ruin to the whole collective and I will ensure that Tarek deals with him, as he dealt with me. And make no mistake, the one thing that kept me civil all those years is gone. There's no strings on me now my dear friend......"

Daigo Stood up, and his eyes flashed a ruby red as he placed his hands on the Cleric, who began to scream moments later.

From that time forth, in a town some miles away from the collectives head quarters, people stayed clear of a corner house where a zombie was said to live. no one ever entered or left, but they could hear the pitiful cries and prayers of a man saying over and over again, "why have you forsaken me, Iomedae?"

Authors note: This story is a work of fiction, but it is based on previous experiences I had with a certain group on Tumblr. I certainly hope @wearepaladin takes a chance to read this in full, to see where I stand on things. And that he will deal with that little toad Lawyer accordingly. And if not. He can expect me to write quite a few more stories like this. Now I bear no ill will towards the members of the collective who joined after the incident in question but know this, there is more to the story of what happened to me than knight, paladin or lawyer will let on. I would much rather continue to write in peace though. And I would much rather not have to deal with the mess I did before. I will continue to write new stories about Daigo, and if anyone wishes to join me in writing such stories, I welcome you with open arms, and I advise the collective not to punish them unfairly for doing so. After all, you're not their owners. @weareadventurers

~Sincerely The Former Pyromancer.

P.S. If there is any justice in the world, Lawyer will be held to the same standard of judgement that I was. If he's not kicked out of the collective for what quite a few members have told me about him, then Paladin will truly be a hypocrite of the worst sort.

#daigo #daigo belfir #iamcrimelord #weareadventurers #the circle #the collective #wearepaladin #wearenemesis

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pianostarinwonderland · 3 years

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I was looking at the Leech twin's wiki pages and then I kinda realized, what if their unique magic were named after how Ursula died? Cuz like, Ursula got stabbed by a ship, and the sharp part of the ship hit her chest (and I'm assuming the heart is there), and then she also got electrocuted by lightning

Anon.

Anon. Shakes you so fucking hard

You smart alec. You. Youuuuuuuuuuuuu—

It makes so much sense. 😭😭😭 In the movie, Ursula was first pierced at the chest, then electrocuted at the same area (Shock the Heart), and when she sank into the sea, her tentacles caught the ship where Eric was on in a bind (Bind the Heart).

You could also read this in the light of how Ursula was in the beginning of the movie vs the end. She first bound Ariel into her contract (Bind the Heart), and she may have won, but she was killed by Ariel and Eric, the former whom she made a contract with, at the end through a stab and eventually the shock from the lightning (Shock the Heart).

Holy shit dude 🗿 I learned something new today.

#ask #twisted wonderland #twst #jade leech #floyd leech #twst theory

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daveygudgeon · 3 years

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When: 9 April 1980, late evening Where: The Drunken Dragon Who: Davey Gudeon

“So, tell me again, what is it you do…” Delilah’s finger traced a delightful sound around her wine glass’ rim. His eyes stay trained to her perfectly cherry red manicured nails, before drifting to her fair skinned face. Her lipstick matched her nails. Davey appreciated the attention to details she’d put into herself. He also appreciated how interested she seemed to be into him. She’d been showering him in attention all evening, even when he turned the spotlight back to her. It’d always come back to him.

An arm was draped along the backside of her chair, and the more intoxicated the pair got, the closer they leaned in to each other. “I told you twenty minutes ago I can’t tell you, and forty minutes before that.” The distance they were at now, felt like a comfortable secret-sharing distance. The raven haired witch’s smirk matched Davey’s. “What makes you think something’s changed between now and then?”

A challenging brow rose, followed by a nonchalant shrug, “Call it a feeling.”

“A feeling,” he echoed, that smirk still in place.

“Uhuh.”

“Okay, let’s say…” He pretended to think it through and then offered the weakest bargain he could. “You buy my next basket of chips and we call it a deal.”

“A basket of chips?” She laughed loudly. He liked her laugh. “Has anyone ever told you you’re easy, Davey Gudgeon?”

Davey beamed proudly, “Only all of the time.” The more he was told not to speak of work, the more Davey felt the need to shout from the rooftops what he was up to. It was easier when he’d been in Nevada. There’d been no temptations of friends and family. Hell, he’d already spilled the beans to Percy about why he’d come back, and surely Briar and Doc and Regan weren’t far behind. At this point, he’d tell Gladys. Anything to talk about him. Anything to prove he was doing better for himself. The boy who’d almost flunked outta Hogwarts was doing mighty fine on his own. And so, Davey indulged the gorgeous Delilah with every detail he could about the large kelpie also known as the Lochness Monster, and why he’d been batched out to protect her from the dangers of outsiders. A large kelpie could sell for a pretty penny. She needed constant watch.

“Holy shit,” Delilah finally breathed out.

“Crazy, huh?” His eyes shone bright, following the fascinated smile that grew upon her lips.

“Crazy how stupid you are, yes,” she laughed bitterly, pulling something from the front pocket of her leather bag and slapping it to the bar’s counter. The wallet fluttered open, Delilah Watson was printed on a badge, above the seal he knew to be of the Magical Law Enforcement Patrol. “Are you aware you signed a legally binding contract when you took your position here in Scotland?”

“Y-yes,” Davey stammered. He’d been put on the spot many, many times in his juvenile years. But he had read the contract. And knew of the stipulations he’d agreed to. For the love of Merlin, he’d signed his fucking life away, hadn’t he?

“Then you’re aware of what you’ll be fined for breaking said contract, yes?” Davey nodded, licking his dry lips as Delilah carried on. The look on her face was smug. He knew how many zeros followed the number he owed. He knew he didn’t possess that money. “Then you’re also aware, if you cannot pay the agreed upon price, you will be spending six months in a Maximum Security Camp.” Prison, she could have said.

He remained silent, deciding to down the rest of his beer. He’d had loose lips all evening. Perhaps the brew could help him along again. And it did, sorta. “I’m allowed a lawyer. I know that much.”

“You are, that is very true. Until then, I believe you know what it is I have to do. I apologize you couldn’t savor the beer. I have the slightest feeling it will be your last for six long months.” Delilah waved a pair of handcuffs in his face. “Turn around, please, Mr. Gudgeon. I’ll be taking you to the facility outside of Appleby.”

#drabble*

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1ddiscourseoftheday · 5 years

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Wed 21 Aug

Niall posted a meme declaring that he doesn't give instagram the right to use his pictures to make fun of it; everyone rushed to let him know it wouldn't actually protect him legally. Niall, a man with probably a million dollars worth of legal staff whose life has been filled with (real and actually binding) contracts since he was a teenager, who presumably has a pretty good grasp on that concept, metaphorically banged his head against the wall in despair. Tom Holland meanwhile was like oh shit wow okay thanks Niall and reposted it from him, lol. A fan squee-ed about running into Niall and posted a pic of a guy with golf bag from behind and said he'd hugged her and she'd said how much she loved him... let's hope it really was all made up and not some weirdo taking advantage cause Niall chimed in quickly to say, "that's not even me!" Don't you know he's always watching, what did you think was gonna happen? Also, again, not very interesting: make your fake sightings more interesting challenge! If it doesn't involve anyone being sold to the band, I don't wanna hear it! Anyway speaking of golf bags, Niall's autographed one that was the prize of a giveaway has been gaveaway, and Niall made a video announcing and congratulating the winner ("there can be only one!")

Everyone's excited about Harry's RS cover and posting about it, including Anne (aww), and a travel writer who tweeted about getting drunk with Harry in Bangkok in 2015 after the 1D show there. He says Harry had fallen out with Zayn, was upset about it, and the band broke up four days later. Obviously the band breaking up wasn't technically what happened a few days later, but whatever; what's of interest here is the report, if this is accurate, that Harry and Zayn had fought just before Zayn's departure. The show in Bangkok was four days before Zayn's last concert with the band.

The gucci fragrance campaign marches on, now with the spots focused on the other, non-Harry, models being released, with little background Harry glimpses to be seen. And Harris Reed posted a behind the scenes photo of themself with Harry and Jeff. "2 gucci models and Harry!" comments Jeff yes yes very funny Mr Potatohead now shush and get out of my cute picture: me as Harris holding a knife to their own throat and staring dead eyed into the camera. Mr Potatohead also followed the editor of Another Man.

The presenter of the Madrid festival posts about about Louis' upcoming performance ("everything is going great and it will be a great show!") presumably in response to rumors that something was amiss which sprang from some pretty flimsy hearsay yesterday, quickly spreading and sparking panic that he wasn't really going to appear. According to this guy, all is well, and he would know. So unless we actually see reason to worry, not just vague rumors, let's be excited- just think, they're probably well into rehearsals! Of songs we've never heard Louis perform! Possibly never heard at all! Less than one more month!

There was a brief flurry of interest in Zayn's website which has a tour tab and a big 'coming soon' splashed across it (and by 'interest' I definitely don't mean 'I nearly had a heart attack don't fucking do this to me holy shit') but no; it's been like that the whole time, for years. SIGH.

Guitar player Chris Leonard posted a couple of pics of Harry, and Brian Friedman posted the second half of the video of OT5 singing Viva la Vida in a gym on their very first day together at TXF and it's somehow even more tear-jerking and amazing then the first half! How can they be so awkward but still sound so beautiful?! Magic from literally day one. Louis and Harry harmonizing is out of this actual world off the charts gorgeous, how the fuck.

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yusuke-of-valla · 5 years

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Basically the process of Staneal adopting the human kids is this

He can’t technically leave Hell, so he needs humans to help him with that so he can shoot Yaldy in the face

he’s powerful enough to spread his influence though, and lets people know “hey, I will take souls in exchange for wealth and power.” He can also make magically binding contracts

Of course he didn’t have a lawyer look over his contract so while he meant “You give me your soul and I give you power and wealth” Shido, Okumura and Madarame just offer him a seperate soul and take the wealth and power for themselves

And so three kids poof into Hell and Satanael’s like “um you seem a little young to be selling souls.”

So he figures out what happened and as a father himself he’s horrified that anyone would do that and is like “Ren you have human siblings now, don’t let them get eaten”

Ren: Hey dad are humans supposed to be this pale? and sticky

Satanael: shit. shit is hell bad for humans?

Ren: I mean? Probably?

Satanael: hmmm fuck ok I’ve got someone I can ask for help

Satanael, appearing in Leblanc out of nowhere: SOJIRO HOLY SHIT HELP I DON’T KNOW HOW HUMANS WORK I THINK I BROKE THEM

After that is settled Sataneal hires Sae to help him with all future demonic contracts.

#demon fam au #this au is a shitpost #demon fam satanael #demon fam ren

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moonlight-at-dawn · 6 years

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A N Y W A Y S

I hate being so filled with salt, so let’s move on and get back to some lunocts right? Right.

I’ve been slightly active -ish on my new twitter lately, including during the time I wasn’t here on Tumblr. But one thing I kinda rambled very vaguely but often about is wanted to write an Elantris inspired Lunoct AU! I don’t know that I ever *will* cause it’d be *work* and I’m so *lazy* with my writing lmao, but I’ve been thinking about it and what I would do if I did~

So, Elantris, right? In the book, it’s been 10 years since their gods-among-men became diseased instead, and people who are afflicted with what once would’ve granted them great power and prestige, they’re now weakened and sickly, and even the grand magic city of Elantris, where they all lived, has crumbled and decayed like the people quarantined within.

The two main characters are Prince Raoden and Princess Sarene, who are engaged with one another at the start of the book. They’ve never met face-to-face, but they’ve written to one another, and used magic entities known as Seon to speak to each other and see the form of one another’s faces replicated in the Seons.

At the very start of the book. Raoden is taken by the Shaod, becoming an Elantrian. Sarene arrived for their wedding a week early, so they could have time to speak and get to know each other at least a little first, and because she’s a romantic at heart (though a pragmatist in action), just to be told he had passed that very morning, suddenly of illness.

Her marriage contract stated that death before marriage was a legally binding marriage, and so she began her life as a widow to a man she had never met. Meanwhile, her “husband” isn’t actually dead, but trying to save a suffering people, of which he had just joined the ranks of.

And that’s how it begins, and it’s got lots of political intrigue and magic and I fucking loved it holy shit.

But Raoden and Sarene are so cute??? They think of each other fairly often, like “I wonder if [they’re] really the way they seemed? I would’ve liked to find out” and Raoden is so WISTFUL about their letters, and Sarene just wants so badly to know that she can be loved for who she is, and she thought she might’ve been able to find that with Raoden, and then he was taken before she could find out.

The romance isn’t the focus of the book, though it is important, and I just really love how both of them are shown to be romantic of mind but pragmatic in action, it’s just so lovely and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~~~

AND SO THE LUNOCTS

I don’t have a soliiiiid plan yet, I’ve been tweaking it constantly, and it really is only inspired by Elantris, I’ve no mind for trying to make a completely paralleled AU.

Buuut, thinking, what if, similar situation, they didn’t actually get to meet before, everything has been through letter. A political union, like Raoden and Sarene’s was, but with each of them holding romantic hopes and dreams, just like them.

Except Noct will be declared dead, at the hands of a daemon, Starscourge taking him over too swiftly for anything to be done. What he’ll really be is totally healthy and off trying to care for the people he can.

Luna will arrive and be married to a supposedly dead Noct, and eventually she’ll leave the Citadel and travel to do healing stuff, and she’ll run into Noct. He’ll know who she is, she won’t know who he is, and that’ll be the start of that, lol

I haven’t quite decided why this will happen though, cause I don’t wanna make Regis a bad guy, so I would need to figure out why this happened. Might have to be something they decided on doing for separate political reasons. Like the need to do this came at such a terrible time for him, but he made the decision for the good of his people, even though he hated doing that to Luna.

#misha rambles #ffxv #lunoct #noctluna #nokuruna

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stealingyourbones · 2 years

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Concept that I feel hasn’t been tapped into with dp x dc:

#dp x dc #danny phantom #john constantine #batman #justice league #feel free to add to this #I’d love to see what y’all think #fanficton prompt #prompt

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terramythos · 6 years

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My reread commentary on October Daye #8, "The Winter Long" or "more shit goes down in this book than the first 7 combined, holy shit".

I apologize to anyone who reads these cause I literally hit the length limit on this post and had to pare it down lmao

-Good start: Under the Acknowledgements section: "Everything I have done with October's world to this point has been for the sake of getting here". Sooo basically the first 7 books? Setup for this one. We're in for a Ride.

I want to emphasize some of the best meta foreshadowing I've seen:

FOR REFERENCE, Rosemary and Rue is the title of book 1. It's also the only book whose opening Shakespeare quote (from Hamlet) doesn't really match the title. If you know your Shakespeare, you probably would have caught that and figured out that it was from The Winter's Tale instead. Plenty of conclusions you can draw just from that. Since then the series has been chock full of hidden identities, and this book has two BIG ones coming into play. Foreshadowing was here from the very fucking beginning, and it is some next level shit. Very well done.

-If you skipped book 1 you are SO fucked, btw.

- we're going to great lengths to describe Sylvester's physical appearance. Gee I wonder why. I'm sure it's not relevant

- yes Sylvester has FOX COLORED HAIR and YELLOW EYES and his magic smells like DAFFODILS and DOGWOOD FLOWERS. He is Toby's LEIGE and FATHER FIGURE.

Me on a first read: oh it's just beginning book exposition, they all do this

Me on a second read: god fucking damn it

- toby: I should have known Sylvester would never disappoint me.

Me: oh sweetie. Oh honey.

- "He smelled like smoke and rotten oranges.

This man wasn't Sylvester Torquill."

Anyone who read book 1: OHSHIT.AVI

Welcome back, Simon! You know, Sylvester's evil twin? You know, the big bad (so far) of the series? The the one responsible for turning Toby into a fish for 14 years?

-Yet he seems kinda... off, huh? Comments about how he didnt know the spell would last 14 years, how he hates to upset October's mom, of all people? Whatever could he mean? :)))

-New toby power: spell reflection? Hell yeah? Also spell BREAKING, but to be fair she did do that one other time. In, you guessed it, book 1.

- "When I tried to picture Sylvester's face, I kept seeing Simon's instead" ow oof

- Simon calling Amandine "Amy", which we've established is an affectionate nickname (it being what, you know, THE LUIDAEG calls her). Why would Simon, of all people, call her that?

... oh.

-That sure explains a LOT, huh? That sure was set up... this whole time, huh?

-Little "fuck you" lines like "I didn't know Sylvester had a niece" in book 2. Talking about January. Well, uh, he has several actually! You're one of them!

-Explanation for why Sylvester had any inclination to be October's mentor... eventually becoming her liege and father figure... even giving her the Changeling's Choice (something family is supposed to do). It seems mighty convenient that a random noble was involved in the life of a changeling to such an extent. BUT, if he was her uncle, and knew his brother wouldn't step up? Well...

-This isn't even the biggest reveal of the book. Like, we're only a handful of chapters in and this bomb gets dropped.

-Sylvester, every 10 minutes: oh boy I cant wait to see my brother so I can like, completely eviscerate him!

Everyone else: uh,

- Tybalt: and here I thought I was going to have to ask Sylvester for his blessing. Now I technically have to ask SIMON?

Toby: uwotm8

Tybalt: oh god uhh I'm joking yeah uhh I'm just trying to distract you from all this stress :)) yeah (nailed it!)!

-And now we begin the "wow Sylvester is actually not a great person" slide. It's been hinted at that he's pretty unstable and has shitty priorities regarding people he cares about. But Toby glossed over a lot of it because she adored him. Welp.

- It's also an interesting aside that Etienne was kind of a dick to Toby for a reason in the earlier books. He legit thought she had been knighted because she was family, not that she had earned the post. And after the last few books he clearly knows now that that's not the case and they've actually become friends. That's interesting hidden character development.

- ok so The Gang finds out that Simon was telling the truth when he said turning Toby into a fish for 14 years was to save her. Because he had actually been hired to KILL her and didn't want to do it. So it was a loophole-- everyone thought she was dead, and then (as established in book 1) pretty much everyone forgot she existed until the spell broke.

-BUT Simon is bound by a geas (where have we seen that before) and cannot divulge his employer's name. But who had such a grudge against Toby and/or her mom to order a hit on her AND forcibly bind everyone to secrecy?

-who knows? Not toby. So they go to The Luidaeg to maybe get a lead, and she establishes right away that she is ALSO bound under a geas and can't say who did it. So we play some 20 questions, and then...

ULTRA DISTRESSING LUIDAEG LORE :((((

-additional: another month name just came into play. August. Toby's half sister, missing for a century. WHAT IS WITH THE MONTH NAMES

- "please don't mistake villainy for evil." That's an.. interesting quote re:Simon.

- Simon's way of protecting toby from the impending threat is "well maybe you turn into a tree for a few centuries but like. You're safe, right? Why are you mad?"

- The Luidaeg: *is straight up dead*

Toby: hey tybalt remember that time in book 2 when I Resurrected the Dead

Tybalt: yeah, it was fucking terrifying and I didnt speak to you for 6 months

Toby: *finger guns* guess whaaaaaat

-The Luidaeg: *says just. A bunch of Lore*

Toby: Luidaeg dont you dare drop that cryptic shit on me then pass out

Luidaeg: nap time

-"If you so much as whisper the first word of a transformation spell, I'll have your larynx in my hand before the second word can form." DAMN, Tybalt.

-Simon: I am VERY sorry for my bullshit earlier. I can't tell you who my employer is, but I CAN give you this BOUQUET of ICE COLD ROSES. Ice cold, like winter. Winter Roses, if you will. Yeah. Uh have a nice life, bye!

Everyone: well this sure is a mystery

-Simon is definitely a morally grey character. Has done really awful shit, is built up as a major villain... but turns out he had relatively little control over his actions. He does the wrong thing a lot but it's usually not for a truly evil end? If the context is to be believed he got stuck in the geas contract with Unnamed Employer to save his daughter, which explains the bad shit he did that we know of. Which then inadvertently kicked off like the whole series. He seems to genuinely care about Toby in a warped way? It would be so easy to write him off as an evil stepdad or whatever and there's plenty of canon to support that stance (she's an illegitimate CHANGELING child) but he seems like he wants to just be her dad. I hope we explore his character more, is what I'm saying.

-And not to keep rambling about it but Toby is an established unreliable narrator and a horrible (initial) judge of character. So it's not like this is an asspull or off base at all.

Twist of the fucking century here.

-You know... the character who set off the events of the series? The character who was murdered in book 1 and bound October to a geas forcing her to find the culprit or die? Evening fucking Winterrose?

-There were hints, most very subtle unlike the other big twists, but probably the biggest one is SHE NEVER SHOWS UP AS A NIGHT HAUNT. And they're in the story quite a bit, and they ALWAYS feature killed off characters. Except Evening.

-My favorite hints were the ones just piled in book 1. Comments like "no one knows who Evening really is" said with zero self awareness. Because we are actually about to find out who she is... 7 goddamn books later.

-dead meme but "surprise, bitch. Bet you thought you saw the last of me."

-God she's so awful lol

-Toby thinking Quentin died then calling him THE SON SHE NEVER HAD is a BIG OOF right to the HEART. ;-;

-The book also points out that The Luidaeg through the series has ALWAYS referred to Evening in present tense. Even though she "died" in book 1.

-The Luidaeg ALSO never refers to her as Evening. It's always "The Winterrose". You know, a title. Which we have heavily emphasized is something the Firstborn use in place of their true names.

*jazz hands* Surprise!

-We also (finally) have a canon explanation for the... rather remarkable coincidence that Quentin, the fucking Crown Prince (from TORONTO), is in San Francisco at all. It was always weird he got sent to Shadowed Hills, and it's been commented on multiple times... Evening arranged it, of course! For reasons we don't quite know. But as the Daoine Sidhe Firstborn, her descendants couldn't exactly say no. Even though they didn't know who she really was.

-We really are falling all over Firstborn in this series? It sure is.. an odd coincidence, huh?

We got:

The Luidaeg: Roane/Selkie

Amandine: Dochas Sidhe

Acacia: Blodynbryd

Evening: Daoine Sidhe

Blind Michael: ... uh actually I don't think we ever learn what race he's Firstborn of. All his "children" are kidnapping victims forcibly twisted into monsters. Well, except for Luna, but we only know the Blodynbryd side.

But it's weird that for being so rare that we've run into 5 of them in 8 books. There's gotta be a reason for it.. but what?

-Luna starts the series as Toby's Surrogate Mom and is now just straight up an enemy huh

-I made this observation in my book 1 notes, but I find it very interesting that all of Toby's initial friends and allies... aren't by this point. Whereas her current allies are either former enemies or people she initially disliked or distrusted.

Starter allies: Sylvester? Was lying to her the whole time. Luna? Pretty much tried to sacrifice her (+above). Evening? Uhh this whole damn book. Devin? Tried to kill her for personal gain. Lily/Connor? Both killed off for real.

Current allies: Tybalt? Literal former enemy turned lover. Quentin? Kind of a snotty, vaguely racist kid she whips into shape. The Luidaeg? Extremely powerful witch who Toby assumes is True Neutral and wouldn't hesitate to kill her. May? Literal personal walking death omen.

It's just a cool reversal. There's so much really excellent character development in this series and I love it.

-Simon still is a pretty major bastard but.. less outright mustache twirling evil than we were led to believe up to this book. You learn his Backstory and while it really doesn't justify his actions it does...explain them.

-Blink and you miss it Lore: August is missing because she entered a contract with the Luidaeg. She's holding the candle from book 3 :)))

I'm starting to realize I stan The Luidaeg so hard I just have to take a picture every time she shows up and does stuff lmfao. (Best character).

-But... nothing like your inconceivably ancient and powerful aunt suddenly owing you a life debt, I guess???

-Toby. You know, just an ordinary weak changeling who has somehow managed to KILL A FIRSTBORN and RAISE THE DEAD. yikes.

I'm just putting this here cause it's funny as shit. Tybalt really is just... a cat

This book: I heard you like distressing Luidaeg lore??

Me: oh thanks I don't need to feel things

-God Evening is awful. Like, if you didn't know that already, see above.

-It says something about The Luidaeg that despite all that shit their Firstborn did to her she ends up becoming such good friends with Quentin, a Daoine Sidhe?

-BIG LORE with The Luidaeg talking to Maeve??? And Maeve "responding" kind of? This series damn well better explore what the fuck happened to those three it's been built up all series

-Omg the showdown with Evening and The Luidaeg. And Toby managing to break free and realize she deserves so much more than Evening-- all without magic. And Simon showing up for a last minute redemption trying to hit Evening with elf shot? I mean he gets shot in the process, but...

-We now have like, 3 or 4 characters just... asleep indefinitely thanks to elf shot. that's gonna be a Thing isnt it. Rayseline, Evening, Simon, Arden's brother...

WE DID IT BOYS

-This is the last full one I've already read. Most of my reactions in 9-12 are gonna be new. So.

#long post #i mean it's under a cut.. but

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othercat2 · 7 years

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fic: (they flow from form to form) 15/?

==>Karkat: consider the possibility that the dragon is metaphorical

He doesn’t really know what to do with himself once Ms. Pyrope leaves. Is he just staying put, out of danger? Is he technically babysitting Terezi who “isn’t doing too well?” Probably not babysitting, he thinks, even though Si seemed to be implying that when they’d spoken. Latula had been so careful about letting him know that he didn’t have to stay if he didn’t want to.

The Pyrope living room is stuffed full of bookshelves with furniture and an entertainment center shoved in as an afterthought. The books are a mix of mythology, criminology, sociology, mystery, history, fantasy, science fiction novels and roleplaying manuals. He grabs a book at random and settles on the couch. The book turns out to be about a prince who goes off to rescue his boyfriend, also a prince, and has various adventures while trying to unlock his Untapped Powers of Magic. Karkat’s up to the part where the prince rescues a fire elemental from a rainstorm when he feels that he isn’t alone in the room.

He doesn’t see anyone at first. It’s the same nebulous not-quite-there “shape” the other Gods assume when they aren’t bothering with a human form. There’s a sense of presence, limbs and dark green eyes arranged around a central column. His brain kept trying to make sense of what he wasn’t really seeing. One moment he saw a tree with eyes, the next he saw a winged lantern shaped like a skull with coiling tentacles.

Karkat set his book on the arm of the couch, open and face down to mark his place. “Hope,” Karkat says. “Hello.” He might have said “hey,” but he wasn’t sure how that would go over. He’d seen and spoken to Hope before, but only briefly. (And the last time he’d been pretty snarky so it might be a good idea to tone that down a little bit this time around.)

“Hello yourself,” Hope says in a voice that sounds like a smile. “I didn’t mean to interrupt your reading. I probably shouldn’t have been watching you so closely. I only meant to take a peek.”

“Why were you?” Karkat asks.

“I could hear you being uncomfortable and unhappy,” Hope says. “And well, you’re here.”

“Is that a problem?” Karkat asks, frowning.

“Oh no,” Hope says, brightening in an uncomfortably literal way. Karkat feels a sense of cheerfulness radiating from Hope, as if all the morning people in the world hopped out of bed and flung open the curtains and wished all of the songbirds good morning. “Quite the opposite, really. It’s good that you’re here, though the reason leaves much to be desired.”

“Yeah,” Karkat says. “So you’re here because I am?”

There was another sense that Hope was smiling. “That should go without saying. I may not be as forward as other members of my family, but rest assured we are all much taken with you, Mister Vantas.”

“As usual I have no idea of what to say to something like that,” Karkat says. “It’s kind of terrifying.” Karkat was willing to admit to something the Gods probably already knew.

“Due to circumstances, we weren’t able to reveal ourselves in a more gentle way,” Hope says. The column-shape pulses and contracts, then folds up into a dark haired boy with glasses wearing a yellow long sleeved shirt and green short pants with suspenders. Hope’s feet are bare and strangely shaped, more like paws than feet, with sharp claws.

“Circumstances involving me being chained up in a freezing cold cave,” Karkat says.

“Not the most romantic first meeting,” Hope says, sitting on the other end of the couch. “I would have preferred, oh, to be some strange and mysterious creature you followed into the woods or a stalwart chap drawing you into strange adventures.” He smiles. “Or you brought to Us as an offering instead of for judgment.”

Karkat can see what He means; Hope is showing him what He means. A gaudy and brilliant temple, and Karkat in gold chains and not much else, chained to an altar. The Gods appear in almost human forms to surround him on the altar. They bend to kiss him, Their hands sliding over skin that feels heated, electric as an aching urgency begins to build within him. He can’t stop himself from arching up, from making soft needy little sounds, begging for more.

Then he’s out of it, back in the living room and shivering with left over sensations and a sense of acute embarrassment. He’s breathless for a second, the sound of his heart beating loud and fast in his ears. “Is that how the wedding thing usually goes?” Karkat snaps when he can speak. It feels as if his entire body is blushing; a rush of embarrassed and aggravated heat.

Hope laughs. “No. But it might be fun to play at.”

“I think that’s a little too kinky for me just yet,” Karkat mutters. “Holy shit.”

“The marriage would take place in the Temple, that part’s true,” Hope says. “You walk to the altar, which is up on a little stage. You say your piece, and the High Priestess says her piece, and then there’s a party.”

“Do You say anything? Any of You?” Karkat asks. No one had really brought up the wedding yet. Not in any kind of detail.

“Not really. The ceremony is acknowledgement and blessing for the people, not the part that binds.” Hope wiggles his eyebrows. “We’re there for the wedding nights of course.”

“Nights?” Karkat asks, not able to help himself. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know about “wedding nights,” plural. At the same time, if he didn’t it would just be kind of lurking there in the background.

“Nights,” Hope says. “At least eight. Maybe more. Like a honeymoon!”

He can’t help wondering how that would go. Would it be one of Them each night, or all at once? He’d really like to ask Kanaya or Si about what it was like. (This was in no way going to happen. He’d die of embarrassment before a word got out.) Where exactly would this “honeymoon” be taking place? His face heats as he thinks of the “temple,” image Hope showed him. The “temple” reminded him of old sword and sorcery movies from the eighties; villains with slave girls hanging off of them, or lounging around on cushions.

Then he finds himself in a big room with fountains, huge arched windows and a bed that’s mostly pillows and furs that he’s lounging in the middle of, naked except for an elaborate gold and ruby necklace, gold bracelets, and two panels of bright red fabric embroidered with gold thread, held in place by a jeweled belt. There’s also something resting on his brow, wrapped around his head. He takes it off and sees it’s a circlet set with diamonds and rubies, the Blood symbol suspended from thin beaded wires between the arches of stylized thorny branches. He blinks and he’s back in the living room. “The hell?”

Hope gives him a look that would be almost innocent if not for the thin, wicked grin that stretches his mouth a little too wide. “People who make virginity sacrifice and harem jokes shouldn’t be surprised to find that their words were inspirational.”

“So my honeymoon is going to be on the set of Conan the Barbarian?” Karkat asks, face heating up.

“It could be on the moon, if you wanted,” Hope says with a brilliant smile.

“What if I don’t want a honeymoon, or a wedding?” Karkat asks. “What if I don’t want any of this?”

“I’m afraid you’re a bit stuck with us,” Hope says. “As We’re a bit stuck on you. You could leave, but we’d follow after you.”

“That kind of showed up a lot in the spell Dad cast,” Karkat says. “You following us if we managed to leave.”

“Even if you wanted nothing to do with Us, never spoke to Us again, never touched Us or allowed Us to touch you, We would follow you,” Hope says.

“Is that even an option though?” Karkat asks. “The no contact thing.”

“It’s an option, though it would be unpleasant for both sides,” Hope admits. “Is that what you want?”

Karkat thinks about it. It wouldn’t be as if everything had gone back to normal. They’d still be there, and he’d be aware of Them. There’d still be figuring out his “Blood” powers. “What I want is that we hadn’t gone camping in the crow woods,” Karkat says carefully.

“Not ‘I wish’?” Hope asks with a grin. “I’m not a monkey’s paw, you know.”

“Yeah, I’m not taking any chances,” Karkat says understanding the reference after a second. He read the story in junior high. Wishing seemed to be something that was inherently dangerous. At least it was in stories.

“‘I want’ could be just as dangerous,” Hope says. “And we would have noticed you eventually, even if you hadn’t gone camping and stumbled onto an initiation.”

“Yeah but it would have been a completely different pile of bullshit. Not the pile of bullshit where--” Karkat breaks off, voice shaking. He scrubs at his eyes, which were watering now. “Someone I’m friends with leaves me tied to a rock so I can get ‘judged.’ She just left me. Like that was an okay thing to do. Like we weren’t friends at all.”

There’s a noise from the hallway then, a sound like a sob or gasp, and then a couple of thumps. Terezi. She had heard him, had been listening for who knows how long. Karkat scrambles off the couch, heart thumping away in his ears. It’s half guilt that she heard him, and half embarrassed that she heard him almost start crying that makes him head for the hallway. He gets there just in time to see Terezi running for her bedroom door in a blur of white robes and bare feet. She slams the door behind her, and shouts something incomprehensible, a series of sounds that he can’t chop up into individual words.

“She says, well, it would translate loosely, ‘he shouldn’t be here, why did you bring him?’ ” Hope says, coming up behind Karkat.

Karkat feels a chill at that, like ice down his spine. He knows how careful and respectful the Believers are about their Gods from what he’s studied so far. A flat “why did you bring him?” like that should have been unthinkable. Karkat glances back at Hope, more than a little worried about Terezi.

“She’s a bearcat, isn’t she?” Hope asks cheerfully. He doesn’t sound angry or the least bit insulted.

“So, no smiting?” Karkat asks cautiously. “Could smiting be a thing that doesn’t happen?”

“Why would there be smiting?” Hope asks with a sort of wide eyed innocence Karkat immediately doesn’t trust.

“It seemed kind of blunt. And from what I’ve read that kind of blunt usually results in someone becoming a greasy smear on the pavement,” Karkat says.

“There are a few who can get away with being ‘blunt,’” Hope says, a spark of amusement in His green eyes. “Or even irascible!”

Karkat stops himself before he can respond to the teasing. Hope is talking about him, Karkat’s pretty sure of that. He’s also pretty obviously hinting at something. It isn’t hard to figure out what He’s hinting at. Who generally gets away with being blunt? “Is.” Karkat pauses for a moment. “Is Terezi like me? A chosen bride or whatever?”

“You’re a bridegroom, not a bride. Well, if you identify as masculine you’re a bridegroom,” Hope says.

“How do you acknowledge transgender identity and still use the term ‘mongoloid’?” Karkat asks, distractedly.

There’s an odd sense of confusion coming from Hope, paired with a frown. “What you wear doesn’t have much to do with whether you’re masculine, feminine, both or neither. It’s an Outsider notion that Our People can’t help but be at least a little influenced by, but really it doesn’t matter.”

Karkat rubs his face with one hand. He had a strong feeling Hope was conflating terms, and if he tried to explain (when he wasn’t exactly an expert) things would just get more confusing. “Okay,” he says. “Is Terezi a bride?”

“We’ve been courting her,” Hope says. Hope looks toward the closed door, radiating affection and concern. “She and my priest found you, you know. She was ready to grieve, but you were alive, surrounded by flowers and marked by Our Favor.”

“Ready to grieve,” Karkat echoes. He remembers Terezi and Eridan taking him to the Temple. The way they talked about what was going to happen to him. Eridan trying to be sinister and the matter of fact way Terezi made sure he knew he couldn’t escape. He remembers hoping that Terezi would help him, and her saying, “You committed a spiritual crime, and the only way your soul can be cleansed is through sacrifice and the blessed intervention of the Gods.”

“You were friends, and she had to send you to judgment,” Hope says. “She did what she had to, and blames herself for what happened.”

“It wasn’t her fault,” Karkat says immediately. “It’s the fault of whoever set me and Dad up.” It felt strange to defend her so automatically. He was still angry--still felt the sting of betrayal--but he couldn’t help defending her. It wasn’t her fault, and she hadn’t come to school or said anything to him since, but he hadn’t said anything to her either. Hadn’t tried talking to her, hadn’t even called her up to yell at her. (He wasn’t going to feel guilty about that. He wasn’t.)

“You could tell her that,” Hope says. (Hopefully?)

“I don’t think she wants me to talk to her,” Karkat says. Despite his words, he finds himself moving toward the closed door. Hope follows after him, silent now. As he gets closer to the door he can sense where Terezi is, in the room. She’s sitting on the floor in front of her bedroom door, leaning against it. He puts his hand on the door. “Hey Terezi. Um. Dad tried to cast a spell and it kind of backfired. Si sent me here while he and your mom fix things. Ms. Pyrope didn’t tell you?”

There’s a silence, stretching into several minutes. “I was asleep. I didn’t know you were here until I heard voices,” Terezi says, her voice muffled by the door.

“Yeah,” Karkat says. “Are you okay?” It was a stupid question to ask. Obviously she wasn’t okay. “I mean, do you want to talk, or should I go away?”

“You want to talk to me after what happened?” Terezi asks in return.

Karkat presses his forehead against the door. “Yeah. I mean, I’m still talking to Sollux after all.”

“Sollux didn’t leave you chained up in the dark,” Terezi says.

“But if he’d been there instead of you, he would have done the same, right?”

Terezi says “yes,” so quietly Karkat almost couldn’t hear it.

“Sollux was pretty sure I’d hate him, you know? Just because he was one of you guys. But I didn’t. I told him were still friends.”

Karkat hears a soft thump against the door. “But I actually did leave you for judgement, which could have killed you or worse,” Terezi says.

“Worse being hallucinations, dementia and permanent brain damage, which you don’t really try treating. Give me a minute; I can come up with a Dad-style rant about ableism,” Karkat says.

There’s another thump, a little louder against the door. “I don’t want to hear it.”

Karkat sighs. “Yeah, I’m not sure I could really manage it. I’m tired and apparently had a really weird Groundhog Day weekend.”

“Groundhog Day?” Terezi asks, as if she can’t help herself.

“Have you seen the movie? The main character keeps repeating the same day over and over. Dad tried some kind of ‘scrying’ thing I guess? It didn’t go so well. Breath pulled me out and I called Si and he sent me to get your mom. I could have gone to Sollux’s house I guess but…I wanted to see you.”

“Even after what happened?” Terezi asks.

Karkat swallows, throat suddenly dry. “Yeah.”

“That’s not what you said before,” Terezi says. “I heard what you said.”

“I figured,” Karkat says. He thumps the door. “Let me in? I don’t want to talk to the door.”

There is a pause, and then he could hear Terezi get up. Karkat steps back as the door opens with a click. Terezi looks pale, her eyes bloodshot and tired, her hair tangled and sticking up. She is wearing the same kind of clothes that Feferi had worn when she’d gotten back from the Temple, and her feet were bare. She stepped out of the doorway to let him in.

Karkat enters and looks around. Terezi’s bed is unmade, and her room was a mess of schoolbooks and looseleaf paper and binders. Karkat sits down at her computer desk, and Terezi sits down on the edge of her bed. Hope enters as well, a diffuse sort of presence that somehow seems to indicate both concern and a desire to not interfere. (Terezi’s shoulders hunch, and her fingers tangle and twist as she stares down at her feet.)

“I’m sorry I didn’t come see you sooner,” Karkat says after a silence that felt long, but might have only been a minute. “I was angry, and then I was trying to figure things out. There was too much happening all at once, and then psychic kaiju are looming over me and crows are screaming ‘Blood for the Blood God,’ at me.”

Terezi chokes on a thin little laugh. “So you’re okay with me almost getting you killed?” Terezi asks, her voice tired and brittle.

“No, that was pretty messed up,” Karkat says. “But it wasn’t your fault. You got set up.”

“I should have seen it,” Terezi says sharply. She look up, and her blood shot eyes are vivid, tear bright teal-green. “I should have seen you! I should have known!”

“You got set up, Terezi,” Karkat repeats. “Me and my Dad got set up. Neither of us blame you for what happened.”

“You should,” Terezi said. “I didn’t See anything about you. Even if a more powerful priest or adept interfered with the ritual and set you up, I should have known about you.”

“About me?” Karkat asks, a little surprised.

“If I’d known, if I’d realized what I was sensing from you, I would have told Feferi and she would have made contact, and this wouldn’t have happened,” Terezi says. “You and your Dad wouldn’t have gone up to the crow woods, and I wouldn’t have had to leave you for judgment.”

“Feferi’s enemies would have just done something else to try discrediting her,” Hope says. “They would have set someone up who wouldn’t have survived judgment at all, and that would have been worse.”

Terezi hunches her shoulders again and the words But I wouldn’t have hurt Karkat! ring in Karkat’s ears. For a moment he sees the line connecting him and Terezi, it pulses with a rapid, almost painful beat. She’s twisting it, it’s hurting her. (It’s hurting him.)

Karkat touches the line--

--he slips out of the chair settling on his knees between Terezi’s feet. He reaches out and catches Terezi’s hands. “Terezi,” Karkat says. “You know I’d be just as freaked out as I was when you left me.”

“I thought about it. I thought about it a lot,” Terezi says, her voice broken into pieces and full of tears. “I could have made it work. You wouldn’t have known.”

“Want to bet I wouldn’t have?” Karkat says. “I’m seeing a lot, just from here.” There was so much. Terezi’s mind was ticking along in tightly wound circles, trying to figure out where she went wrong. She saw him, over and over again, in the Temple, taking him to the Chamber of Repentance. In her mind she had ruined everything, destroyed the sacred marriage before it could even happen. Karkat would never come to love the Gods (the way she did). She had done the unforgivable; she was a false Seer, a false Beloved. She tried to pull away from him, wanting to escape him (her thought).

“Terezi. Terezi no,” Karkat says. “Terezi, stop it!” His throat ached with the force of the words. Terezi froze, wide eyed, staring. (There’s a sense that she’s fighting him. He has a sense that teeth are bared and wings mantled at him, a fierce and terrible something-that-is-her-and-not-her.)

“Please, Terezi, it’s okay. Stop beating yourself up. You already did all the penance crap. You don’t need to do more.”

Terezi drew in a breath to start protesting, but Karkat squeezes her hands--

--and runs right over her with his own words.

“I mean it Terezi. You don’t need to fix me. You don’t need to fix whatever mess you think you made between me and your Gods. I probably would have been just as freaked out if Light gave me a tentaclehorror Valentine’s Day card, or I don’t know Hope put Green Mansions in my Netflix queue. I don’t hate you, I don’t hate Them, okay? What happened was fucked up and weird and I am not okay with it but I am also not okay with you holing up in your room like this because of me. I mean, you can hole up if you think you need to, but it’s been a long time and I’m worried and confused and I can feel how bad you feel about what happened.” He tries a spell, a small one, sending calm through the connection while he talks, half begging half bullying. He shows her how he feels. He visualizes the frantic pulse slowing, the tangles coming out smooth and straight. It was slow, very slow going, but he saw/felt the tension and misery fade, go hazy and blunt.

“I’m so sorry,” Terezi says finally in a small, miserable voice.

“I know,” Karkat says. He rises to sit beside her on the bed, and pulls her into a hug. “You want to get something to eat?” he asks.

“Yeah,” Terezi says.

She doesn’t move to get up, and he doesn’t move either for several minutes.

<==

==>

Books referenced: I make a reference to Karkat reading Diane Duane’s The Door Into Fire. It is a very good book.

I also make a reference to Green Mansions which is a book that has been thrown across the room because the ending is sad and I want to kick the protagonist in the balls until he walks with a permanent stoop for the rest of his miserable life. It’s also a movie. I have not seen the movie due to my antipathy for the novel. (And the protagonist. Who I despise.) Hope would like the movie because it’s ~~Romantic~~

I have a Patreon! If you like my writing, please consider becoming a patron! Or you could buy me a coffee! Donation links are in the sidebar of my blogs! I am having a Continuing Financial Crisis and could use the help as being homeless = no writing.

#homestuck #eldergodstuck #karkat vantas #fan fic #writing

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