#holy shit I fucking b a l l o o n e d

[stonerbellybabe]

what Taco Bell does to a mf

[denaliwrites]

f i c m a s t e r l i s t

p o l i c i e s (please read before making requests!)

b a d s a m a r i t a n The Best of You, Honey, Belongs to Me Blackthorn Cover Myself in the Ashes of You Dumb Ways To Die Enough of You to Dull the Pain (18+) Hellbent Looking For A Godsend Hit Me With Your Best Shot I Got This Feeling On A Summer Day (18+) I'm Gooey in the Middle Baby Let Me Bake In His Eyes A Flaming Glow Intrigued and Afraid Keep You Like An Oath (18+) Killing Me Softly My Baby Shot Me Down (18+) Not Much Between Despair and Ecstasy (18+) Only Touch That Gets Me Melting (18+) Run Rabbit Run (18+) Say My Name Send a Thousand Kings Away Shia Surprise Something Good to Celebrate Stop, Look and Listen, It's Halloween! Taste of a Poison Paradise Trust in Me, Just in Me With Your Scars and Your Lonely Heart Your Body's a Secret Girl and You're About to Spill It (18+)

t h e b o y s Watch That Butcher Burn

b r o a d c h u r c h Always Leave Me With a Hungry Heart Am I Doing This Right? An Art to Life's Distractions Beating Like A Kick Drum Girls Like Girls Like Boys Do It's Been a Long, Long Time Love's Perfect Ache Now and Again We Try to Just Stay Alive Regale You With A Gourd-geous Tale Say You'll Remember Me Say You'll Remember Me (Denali's Version) Tell Me It's A Nightmare What My Heart Was Worth

d o c t o r w h o Cuddle, Meet Puddle Cute Things Don't Blink (Part 1) Don't Turn Your Back (Part 2) Don't Look Away (Part 3) Dreams See Us Through (Part 4) Hate the Feeling of Falling Have a Holly Jolly Christmas Horrible Things Isn't That Wizard It's How I'm Made Let Me Come Home Little Creepy House Love Letters On the Brave Shit The Origin of (Love Bug) Species What Beautiful Things I'll Wear When the Crypt Doors Creak You Know That I Would Jump Too

d u c k t a l e s Tales of Daring

g o o d o m e n s All I Want For Christmas Aziraphale's Favorite Author Dance on a Tightrope of Weird Free as My Hair His Love is All in Me How the Wine Plays Tricks on My Tongue Lockdown Blues Making Biscuits My Heart's a Stereo Naked in That Garden (18+) Out There Making DuckTales Pickin' Up the Pieces of the Mess You Made Road to Hell Something Meaty For The Main Course Step Too Far Tongue Tied Your Love is Holy (18+)

f a l l o f t h e h o u s e o f u s h e r Tomorrow I Shall Be Fetterless (18+)

f r i g h t n i g h t Emptiness to Melody Everybody Scream in Our Town of Halloween Fixed Up to the Nines Howl Like an Animal in the Darkness I'm So Hot I'd Fuck Myself (18+) I'm Starvin', Darlin', Let Me Put My Lips to Somethin' Late Night Devil Put Your Hands On Me (18+) Make Me Glow Night of Long Fangs (18+) Parade of Dancing Skeletons Talk So Pretty (18+) Who Are You Supposed To Be, Criss Angel? (18+)

h a u n t i n g o f b l y m a n o r ???

j u r a s s i c p a r k / w o r l d Best Behavior The Future Ex Mrs. Malcolm

p r o d i g a l s o n But Then My Stupid Phone Beeps Never Fallen From Quite This High Office Supplies Rude Boy They are the Hunters, We are the Foxes Trigger Happy With a Sense of Poise (18+)

s l o w h o r s e s Imposing Figure Inappropriate

[arcadiabaytornado]

Live Playing Double Exposure First Thoughts:

A: Okay, I do love that you can pick Max’s outfit right away. I chose the rainbow sweater.

B: This sounds over dramatic but it was so intense to see Max’s face again. For a very brief moment I was 13 again watching Max wake up in the storm.

C: Am I insane or all the sounds in this game like…muffled?? I have my audio settings all the way up so it’s not that. Speaking of settings I also took the motion blur off and the graphics look so much now.

More Undercut

D: I’m already finding it super interesting that Max finds comfort in the destruction of old buildings after hell week. That could mean a lot of things but I’ll wait to see if the game tells me before I get analytical.

E: I love Safiya already. PLEASE let her be a love interest.

F: I do love the camera mechanism!!!!

G: Max lost her powers after hell week? That’s also super interesting holy shit. I’d love to know more about that, though my guess is that Max maybe completed her purpose with her power and therefore lost it? I wonder what that would mean for Daniel and Alex….

H: I’m trying to not to think of Chloe to much, but man she would have loved an old abandoned bowling alley.

I: Getting used to older Max is an adjustment. She doesn’t feel out of character per se, but it is weird because I keep expecting her to act like her eighteen year old self and then she doesn’t because she’s older now.

J: Older Max is already coming off as a lot more confident/reckless than younger Max. I like that change a lot!

K: I don’t know how I feel about Max making a one liner every time I examine anything.

L: Ah fuck. Is fate after Safiya or Max this time.

M: Did they really put the “We will :)” flashback right before making us confirm that Max and Chloe broke up. I’m going to fight Decknine.

N: Max is never beating the autism allegations.

O: I know people are upset at the “high school sweetheart” line but in context it seems like Max is trying to deflect the conversation to not talk about what Chloe actually was to her.

P: The texts between Max and Chloe were so uncomfortable to read. I know the storm changed them both, but….i don’t know…it just seems weird that Chloe reacted like that to Max wanting to move in with her permanently. I’m getting the vibe that their relationship was mentally and emotionally over on Chloe’s end way before it was on Max’s end.

Q: Max is ghosting her parents now and that devastates me.

R: Can I have a middle ground option on Amanda? I’m not ready for Max to have a huge crush yet, but I wouldn’t say she’s not Max’s type.

S: Okay, the Chloe/Victoria thing seems like fanfiction. It’s the only thing so far that I’ve gone “ugh” at.

T: The Vortex Club parallel is not lost on me.

U: I’m sorry but Max’s eyes look so bad…she also looks like she had a different model from every other character for some reason??

V: I’m just going for it and saying “A date thing” If Safiya is a romance choice later on I’m going to be so mad. But that’s what other saves are for.

W: Hearing Chloe’s name is a jump-scare at this point lmao.

X: I’m loving Moses. He’s so awkward and seems really sweet. Which makes me scared he’ll be the killer because the LIS franchise does not let us have nice things.

Y: I don’t even know how Max is SUPPOSED to talk about what she’s running from regardless if she sacrificed Chloe or the Bay.

Z: I wonder if they’re going to give Max’s power a celestial explanation and that’s what’s with all the solar system imagery.

[fishtankwater]

Good morning! could u do kazuichi nsfw alphabet :) gn or fem reader plsss and pref top reader have a nice day :D

OH THANK FUCK I FINALLY GOT A REQUEST

I was getting so bored waiting on one 😭

Uh anyway Tysm to this anon

AND HOLY SHIT I HAVE RSV. I AHVE A BABY VIRUS. A BABY VIRUS. SOBBING

Anyway my bad for ranting

Kazuichi souda x GN!Reader

CW- nsfw shit that’s it idk what to put here anymore 😭🤛🏻

Currently listening- Dumb Dick

A-Aftercare

Bro…Kaz would give so many kisses and praise the SHIT out of you. But if you degraded him he would need praise cuz let’s be honest he would think it’s true and probs cry

Also he’ll probably struggle to know what you want and ask 2663825372 questions. PLEASE shower with him after he wants it. Do it. You know you want to

B-Body part

Him- his muscles 💀

I forget he’s muscular sometimes it’s genuinely so weird to think abt. But PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SQUEEZE HIS BICEPS he loves it sm.

You- let’s be honest. The titties if u have em if not you chest in general

That whole vicinity is just chefs kiss to him If you have tits he will put his hands up ur shirt and squeeze them while cuddling and he’d probs calm them his “best friends” 💀

C- Cum

The first time he came as a kid he probably got scared cuz he didn’t know what it was and called his dad and was like “HELPPP” 😭. Ok I’m sorry for bullying him

His cum is probably sweet with a salty aftertaste if that makes sense and he cums a small amount so uh savor it while you can 😘

D-Dirty secret

Bro has so many pics of you naked in his camera roll he also records your moans/whimpers while y’all fuck tbh

AND HE SAVES EVERY VIDEO OF YOU HE CAN FIND he will become a professional stalker the second y’all become intimate or start dating

E-Experience

Unpopular opinion but I think he has a decent amount of experience like— not with women with the men AND HE WILL STILL DENY TAHT HE IS BISEXUAL “no I only did it because I was bored” AHHAHAHSHSHSJSHSJ

F-Favorite position

Please ride him. Please. Do it

OR SUCK HIM OFF IN THE SHOWER SUDHEHDHDBDJHE

“D-darlin-A-ah!”

STOP I CANT BRWTAHE

G- Goof Off

Depends what mood he’s in like sometimes he’ll be chillin laid back not caring how he acts and sometimes he’ll be stressed and just want to love you n shit

H- Hair

Def dyed his pubes pink LMAO

but there’s little to nonexistent hair

J-Jack off

Always thinks of you when it happens cuz he’s too embarrassed to ask for your help (poor baby)

L- Location

Anywhere anytime you ask he provides 💀

He prefers the bed to shower tho tbh

M-Motivation

Anything you do lol

But specifically seeing ur thighs, ass, or seeing you change or the thought of you showering like you being naked he has a urge to come in there with you tbh

N-Nuhuh

No hurting you bedsides a lil biting and maybe spanking. He also doesn’t wanna degrade you like he loves you and has no reason to think otherwise. Also other than overstim and biting he doesn’t wanna be hurt like bro 😔

O- Oral

Giver 💪🏻

Bro…the only time he will EVER overstim u is during oral like 😍 he loves your taste he can’t help it

When receiving he will buck his hips squirm whimper and cry tbh like out of happiness like it feels so good he can’t help it

P- Pace

Slow and steady wins the race

Bro will edge himself he doesn’t wanna go fast n hurt you to rush for it to be over he lovessss making love to you

Q- Quickies

“NOT HAPPENING!” -kazuichi souda

R-Risk

YES bro if your ok with it he will do it

He loves having public sex sm

S-Stamina

As long as you want him to go he will go

Wanna go for 5 hours? Ok bet he may not have much stamina that’s why he loves riding or cowgirl

T-Toy

Nope nada nee

HE wants to pleasure YOU not some toy

U-Unfair

No he would never but when you tease him he gets so shocked like jaw dropped to the floor but he loves it it’s like OSNHECSHSGHEHBRHEJHEH

V-Volume

WHIMPER-ER

Bro when he does moan he will moan so loudly too like are you trying to get the neighbors to call the cops on us??

W- Wild card

He gets jealous of gundham and pulls you aside to fuck the shit out of you like one of the only times he ever told you is when he’s jealous

X-X-Ray

I watched a video on yt that gives headcannon dog their dick size and tbh it seems kind of accurate his was 5 inches which I think it would maybe like that or 6 inch anywhere between 5-6 inches tbh (6inch= 15.24 centimeters 5inch= 12.7 centimeters for my non American people)

Y-Yearning

He’s horny 24/7/365 ok shut up

Z-ZZZZZZZ

He will be tired but try to stay awake to eat drink take a shower and then he’s out 😘

[pink-bear]

NSFW Alphabet: Rantaro Amami

Pretty boy...what secrets do you hold...

Stuff under the cut. Character is depicted as 18+

THIS IS 18+ ONLY! MINORS DNI!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He likes to bathe after sex, and will happily invite his partner to join him if they are close enough. He makes sure to take care around tender parts, not wanting to hurt them.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes his hands and arms, considering how decorated they are. They can tell many stories both in and out of the bedroom, and he especially loves to paint his nails all pretty 💅

As for his partner, it honestly all depends on the person. Regardless of how they look, he always finds something attractive about them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Cums an average amount, and it tastes…pretty much how you would expect it to lol

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He loves being pegged more than actually getting fucked by a real cock. Partly because pegging can lead to more fantastically shaped dicks, but he also just loves the image of his partner all harnessed up and about to bend him over. Plus he isn’t the biggest fan of having cum inside him, and he doesn’t have to worry about that with pegging.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s had a few partners of both sexes, so he’s pretty knowledgeable. Even with his first time he was a natural, going completely by instincts, and leaving both himself and his partner satisfied.

F = Favourite position (this goes without saying)

He likes doing it sideways, in front of a mirror if possible! He loves watching his cock (or his partner’s) get in nice and deep~

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s not super goofy, but he doesn’t mind a little giggling and silliness if the mood is right.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He usually keeps is very well groomed, or may even shave it for special occasions. And oddly enough, the carpet matches the drapes, albeit slightly darker.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

With flings it’s very straightforward, not having a lot of tenderness and be more about the pleasure. With long time partners he is much more attentive and affectionate.

When he’s taking someone’s virginity (something he’s done several times) he is extremely soft and gentle. You’re in the best of hands with him.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn’t do it too often, since he’s always on the move, but every so often he’ll settle down and do some nice self care. He likes hearing the rain and crickets outside his tent…a peaceful fap :)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He loves dirty talking, and is quite skilled at it. He’ll whisper sweet nothings in your ear, reaching around to play with your nethers in a deliciously low voice…it is quite effective.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

While bedrooms/hotel rooms are nice, Rantaro really enjoys doing it in a tent out in the wilderness away from the hustle and bustle of city life.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Honestly the mood will just randomly strike him, and he’ll start to flirt/get all touchy with his partner until they escalate and make it to the bedroom (or right there on the couch, that’s good too).

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Nothing unhygienic, as always.

He doesn’t like it when his partner scratches his back. One time his partner got a little too overzealous and really scratched his back raw. Not only was it painful, it was rather unsightly, and he had to wear a shirt for the rest of the trip-

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Holy shit does this guy know how to suck cock. I mean he’s a pro at eating pussy too, but MAN does this man suck dick like a champ. He has no gag reflex, and has been able to deepthroat every cock he’s come across without issue.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It depends what the mood is, but he’s pretty consistent with his pacing and roughness.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Quickies are fun! And sometimes that’s all he has time for with how busy he is.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

A little bit of risk can be fun, but he doesn’t like taking stupid ones. If it’s too busy or likely that someone would walk in on them, he’ll politely decline.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He has pretty good stamina overall, and can go three or sometimes more rounds on a good day.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He very much enjoys using toys. His favourite combination is a magic wand (for himself and/or his partner) and prostate massager.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

While it isn’t unbearable, he does enjoy a bit of teasing. Once his partner voices their displeasure, he’ll apologize with a chuckle and get back to work.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

More on the quiet side when it comes to moans, but he is very talkative. Lots of dirty talk and words of encouragement.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Along with his several ear piercings, Rantaro has his bellybutton, nipples, tongue and cock pierced (specifically a Jacob’s latter)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Like everything else about him, his dick is very nice to look at. Average length, uncut, smooth, curves slightly upwards and has a nice pair o balls to go with it.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Not the highest, but still pretty healthy. If he has a stable partner it’s more frequent.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Once he’s all cleaned up, he’s ready for bed. Cuddles are a perfect way to end the night.

🌸🌸🌸

Hope you enjoyed! And if you don’t agree with any of these, that’s fine! These are just my personal headcanons!

Alphabet template

[sparkedblaze]

Hi here's all my favorite things about Livesies as I watch it

92sies

This is fsfs gonna be part 1 of 2 or 3

T/W violence, cursing, ets

The Overture. It plays all these semi-familiar tunes from 92sies with a little funky freshness to it and I love it sm

THE FUCKING PROJECTIONS AHAHHHHH

CRUTCHIE BEING THE ONLY OTHER NEWSIE (BESIDES ALBERT) WITH A BACKWARDS HAT

"I ain't been walkin' so good" 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

"Doyawannabustyaothalegtoo?!" "Uh.. no I wanna go down."

"Ya seein' stars alright."

Their accents and over acting are amazing

A big life in a small town SUCKS Jackson Kelly

Heh heh

*waves hand in front of Crutchie's eyes*

CRUTCHIE ACTUALLY CLOSING HIS EYES AND HIS LIL SMILE WHILE HE'S IMAGINING SANTA FE

DID I MENTION THE PROJECTIONS

yA RIDe it inStyLE FEACHA ME RIDIN IN STILE

"WORK THE LAND CHASE THE SUN SWIM THE W H O L E R I O G R A N D E JUST FOR FUUUUN"

"WATCH ME STAND😄 Watch me run 😀 🙁"

"hey HEY"

THE IDEA THAT THE PROLOGUE IS ACTUALLY A PROLOGUE I THINK IT'S @raggedy-albert 'S HC

RACETRACK MOTHERFUCKING HIGGINS

ALBERT FUCKING DASILVA

"A leg of lamb 🥰"

R A L B E R T

FINCH

BEN COOK SKY FLAHERTY IAIN YOUNG JOSH BURRAGE

MUSH'S HOP LOOKING FOR HIS HAT

MIKE AND IKE TRADING HATS

CRUTCHIE SHINING HIS CRUTCH

BUTTONS' HAND MOVEMENT ON 'FISHES'

JACK NUDGING SMALLS ON 'FISHES'

IAIN YOUNG'S LIL RAT BOY FACE

'Step aside Romeo nothin more concerns u here'

Poisonally

Kath's sass

Darcy pretending he's straight

"I'M CRUSHED"

"Gonna rain?" "Uuuuhhhhhh..... No rain oh-ho partlycloudyclearbyevenin"

"BLIND" "AND MUTE" "AND DEAD"

Jack taking Finch's slingshot

Flip

Tommy's lil hops

"I LIKES LIVIN CHANCEY"

ELMER AND BUTTONS TAKING OFF THEIR HATS WHEN THE NUNS SHOW UP

"I dunno Sister, but it's bound to rain soon'a o' lat'a!"😃

BEN COOK

ANTHONY ZAS

NICK MASSON

JOSH BURRAGE

SKY FLAHERTY

IAIN YOUNG

CHAZ WOLCOTT

AND ALL THE OTHERS WHO I DON'T REMEMBER THE NAMES OF THE ACTORS

Everyone hopping to give their cups back

"I DO TOOOOO SO IT MUST ME TRUUUUUE WHAT A SWITCH, SOON WE'LL ALL BE RICH DON'T KNOW A BETTER WAY TO MAKE A NEWSIES DAYYY"

Their entire lil dancey dance right here

Elmer offended at being whacked with hat

"GOTAFEELINBOUTAHEADLINEISMELLSMEAHEADLINEPAPESAREGONNASELLLIKEWEWASGIVINEMAWAYBETCHADINNERITSADOOZYBOUTAPISTOLPACKINFLOOZYDONTKNOWANYBETTERWAYTOMAKEANEWSIESDAYIWASSTAKINOUTTHECIRCUSANDTHENSOMEONESAIDTHATCONEYSREALLYHOTBUTWHENIGOTTHERETHEREWASSPOTWITHALLHISCRONIESYOIMGONNATAKEWHATLITTLEDOUGHIGOTANDPLAYTHEPONIESWEATLEASTDESERVESAHEADLINEFORTHEHOURSTHATTHEYWORKUSJEEZIBETIFIJUSTSTAYEDALITTLELONGERATTHECIRCUS"

Finch finger guns

Jack taking Finch's hat

Smalls diving under Finch's leg

Finch's face right before they say 'yeah!'

Whatever Al's face is doing ever

*disappointment*

Romeo waving like the little bean he is

"WATCH IT"

"It's honest woik"

"AINCHA FADDA ONE O THA STRIKAS"

Albert and Racer

Ralbert

Whack whack

The Delanceys running into each other

Morris hopping from steps

Everyone getting their bags

ALBERT PUT YOUR FUCKING HAT ON

Big smiles everyone, we just finished the first big number Race: :O

Davey trying to slow Les

"I'll call ya sweetheart if you spot me 50 papes"

"I'M NEW TOO"

Albert, to Jojo: Yo check this shit out. Watch what I'm about to do to this bitch "YOU HAVE A VERRRRY INTERESTING FACE. EVER THOUGHT ABOUT GETTIN' INTO MOVIN' PITCHAS?!"

"BUY A TICKET THEY LET ANYONE IN"

*Does not pay*

Everyone's face when they laugh at Jack making fun of Oscar

"The faymus Jack Kelly"

Ben Cook's dumbass socks

Jack's "holy fuck he can do math" face

Specs laughing at Jack's reaction to Les knowing math

"That's disgusting"

W i b b l e

Specs never using stairs properly

Albert riding in on Pulitzer's desk

FOOTBALL? *whack* VIOLENT? *whack*

"Guess what? He got elected." *runs*

Nunzio.

My roommate and I accidentally mashing cut and slit like twice and so now we say slut instead of either

"-like an army that's marching to war." I mean... He wasn't wrong

Has anyone noticed how similar Hannah and Kath look?

BIG STEP BIG STEP BIG STEP

"buy a pape from a poor orphan boy" *cough cough*

"BORN TO THE BREED"

"THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN SCHOOL" "This kid"

Racetrack hawkin in the background and bolting when Snyder comes

"Doesn't everyone?"

ALL THE CONTINUITY ERRORS IN MEDDA'S THEATER. THE BOYS GOING FROM NEWSIES TO FAKE MUSTACHE MEN AND BACK

LOVEY DOVEY BABY PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND

Jack saying pocket with the same intensity that Draco Malfoy says Potter

MEDDA FUCKING LARKIN

"The only thing I own is the mortgage"

"ARE YOU BLIND SHE GOT NO CLOTHES ON"

The look Jack and Davey share when Medda says she knows the governor

"YOU PICTURED THAT?!"

"Take it easy, it's a bunch of trees."

"Jeez! I never knew no one with a aptitude!"

"I AM?! HOW 'M I DOIN'?!"

'I'm better than you' the song

Jack's lil figure 8 dance with just his head

"And prayers from the Pope"

Devin Lewis as Jack for like two scenes.

"AND. MY. BANK."

Watching Jack recognize Katherine

"Why don't you go find out?" 👀

"You want I should lock the door"

"Doin what?"

It's hard to like a whole lot about the scenes where they're flirting bc Kath is so outwardly uncomfy with it

And also they're both simps for Jacobses

*two finger point*

"sOrry mIss mEddA"

Jack's hesitation before he starts singing

"Girls are nice, once or twice, til I find someone new" You bisexual pining bitch

Does anyone know who does the actual sketch?

T H E P R O J E C T I O N

"-and you lie like a rug!"

"What are you doing?!"

"Hey-hey quiet down there's a show goin' on!"

"Shhhhhhhhh"

"Everr"

HAT TIP AND SMIRK AS JACK IS CLIMBING DOWN

MIKE AND IKE GIVING OFF THE MAJOREST SIBLING EVERGY

"Sirens is like lullabies to me."

DELANCEY DEVASTATION AT "they've got a mother" THEY'RE SO TRASH AND HURT I LOVE THEM

"He traded her for a box o' cigars!" "HEY THEY WAS CORONAS"

"Ain't we the hoi polloi!"

"Ask me after they put up the headline"

"Is that news?" "ITISTOME"

Romeo. R O M E O

"I ain't payin' no sixty."

DEUS SPECS MACHINA

BAMBAM "C'mere fellas"

Henry's pose as he says "AIN'T WE GOT NO RIGHTS?!"

IK THAT EVERYONE SAYS TOMMY LOOKS DOWN BC HE'S CONFUSED WHEN JACK SAYS 'WOULD YOU KEEP YOUR SHIRT ON' BC HE'S WEARING A SHIRT YADDA YADDA BUT HE'S NOT THAT'S HIS UNDERSHIRT. SO HE'S CONFUSED BC HIS SHIRT IS ALREADY OFF. BACK IN THOSE TIMES BEING IN JUST YOUR UNDERSHIRT, YOU MAY AS WELL HAVE NO SHIRT. THX FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK

LES SHOVING PEOPLE

Crutchie desperately trying to hop to keep up

Jojo and Elmer.

"Hey Jack you still thinkin?" "Sure he is. Can't ya smell smoke?"

(I'm out of character limits so this is part 1)

[guardioland]

Pep Guardiola NSFW headcannon

It’s midnight and thoughts are running wild so here’s something I conjured up from the depths of my gutter brain…..

18+ MINORs DNI

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He would be so so caring, completely different from how he was like during the sex itself. He would take care of you and make sure you are okay

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Tbh I think he likes his own body shape, and the fact that he can look extremely good in whatever outfit he wears. I think he’s also a ass man more than a tits man but ok that’s just my vibes about him

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Inside you 100%. Man lowkey would have a breeding kink and would want to see his cum dripping right out of you

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Gotten semi-hard halfway during a game before and had to will it to go away

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

oh just look at this man….good looks + seemingly party boy from barcelona.. bound to have gotten loads on girls back in the days

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

On the desk inside his office is one for sure. Or while he’s seated down on his office chair and you ride him in the seat. But on long days he likes to lie flat down and let you do all the work…..

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s one hell of a passionate guy so probably no jokes during the sex itself and pep being pep would be solely focused on the task at hand

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I would say neatly trimmed, something like his beard

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

I have this theory that he’s a sweetheart outside of bed but once in bed he’s an absolute freak and can be rough as fuck

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Managing barca bayern and city isn’t the most stress free job and would probably have had to rub one out during the pl/ucl away games day where he is away from his partner and feeling stressed about the game. But he defo prefers the sex but when push comes to shove and he really needs to relive stress, he would jerk off but without porn

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Other than the above mentioned breeding kink, I think the whole world kinda knows that he’s into exhibitionism… (have yall seen the way he rubbed his balls on the touchline oh my god sent me to hell for real). For sure into some form of bondage and would want you to call him sir in bed etc … bascially hes a freak and vanilla sex isn’t his thing. Also possibly into spanking and seeing u in a collar with his name on it (holy shit)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He probably fucked a whole lot of times in his office (but isit his favourite? not sure) but for sure he would like to do it in a bed where there’s a bedframe above him (IYKYK HAHAHAH)

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

His passion is football and winning so he gets all worked up and horny after a good game and would seek a good fuck. Or if the game doesn’t go the way he wants it to then he’ll use sex as a way to relieve his anger (aka back to the rough sex again)

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Yea he wouldn’t use sex toys

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

100% loves getting his dick sucked…..under the table while he plans his tactics defo gets him off real quick…

would eat you out occasionally knowing how good his beard would feel against you soooooooooooo

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Oh he’s a control freak … just like how he’s on the pitch wanting his tactics to be perfect and wanting nothing to be out of line, sex would be exactly the same …. And u know how his style of football is fast short passes and lots of possession… yea same for sex I guess rough fast and possessive

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s a busy man so he probably doesn’t mind

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Once again he’s into exhibitionism so he’s not adverse to taking risks…fucking you in places that yall might potentially get caught/seen would be exciting to him

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Obviously used to be able to last much longer in his youth but age is a thing BUT still could go for a decent amount of time

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

No absolutely no toys….pep has a HUGE ego and would like to think that he alone can give the greatest pleasure and no toys are required at all….(ok continuation in the wildcard section)

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Think time is pretty precious for him so he doesn’t like to drag things out and want to just get to the point

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Oh he 100% would dirty talk in Spanish/catalan no doubt about that,,, and I think he would make occasional grunts and “fucks” … and everytime he swears he would throw his head back

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Ok I would like to think that he can sometimes a selfish lover like depending on his mood. So he would sometimes (many times idk) only care about deriving pleasure for himself (aka fucking you without foreplay, getting u to only suck him off and then leaving for the match)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I would say average length and girth although man for sure knows how to use it well

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He’s a freak…I bet sex is always on his mind one way or another…remember that press conference where he says “I prefer the sex” oh my god……

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards

Quite quickly I assume as he would also be tired from the long day of either training/ a match day

[where-are-the-spooky-gays-2]

Have I talked about Skyrim au? Probably. I know I've at least mentioned it. Anywho. I'd say I'll be brief but I'm laughing at myself. Me? Brief? No way

Remus — Remus is a part of the Dark Brotherhood. They are ! assassins ! He specializes in contracts that are meant to send a message to the general public and he's kind of weird. A bit like Cicero but even Cicero says there's something off about him. He fits in extremely well though and it satiates his blood lust enough for him to actually chill the hell out the rest of the time.

Roman — Roman is a part of the Companions! They are a warriors guild and he has proven himself to be one of the best among them. A true shield-brother! He's also a werewolf in the inner circle (a fact of which Remus is extremely jealous) and he always plays the hero for whatever they have to do.. which is good because its the schtick. Clearing bounties, picking bandits off the roads, whatever. He's up for it.

Logan — Logan is a professor at the College Of Winterhold! I'm going to pretend there is more storyline to the College and actual classes because I love mage Logan and he deserves love!! He actually kind of hates that it's freezing there but he wants to learn more magic so he does. I love him and he is babey. I'm on a Logan kick rn.

Patton — Patton attends the Bards College in Solitude. He learns to play instruments and he travels. Why? Honestly, I just really like the idea of someone thinking he's a stupid bard but he has gossip from across Skyrim and will break his lute on someone's head if he needs to. I don't want to push Innocent Useless Patton; he's a deadly bitch. And bards aren't usually deadly in Skyrim so I'm changing things for him <3

Virgil — Virgil is a vampire in Clan Volkihar but he's often on the roads instead. He's not a big fan of the leader of the clan (Harkon when I catch you Harkon) and was actually friends with his daughter Serana before she went missing (to his knowledge). He was originally a member of the Dawnguard (vampire hunters) but he contracted vampirism and couldn't cure it in time. He treats it as a "you ever have one of those days where this might as well happen?" thing.

Janus — Janus is a thief in the Thieves Guild in Riften. I have been waiting for this. He is one of the best thieves they've got and he's cocky about it. He's basically Vex, except that he's actually better at pickpocketing and sneaking into places. He's also a fence, which means anything stolen that he's given he'll turn around and sell for a profit. He's immensely cocky but it's for a good reason.

Thomas — Dragonborn. Just some dude who turned out to be Dragonborn and is now travelling and oh god, why does he have to meet such interesting people?

Anyway they all know each other. Virgil and Janus are exes, Patton and Logan grew up together, the twins see each other like once in a blue moon but Remus occasionally tries to kill Roman for the fun of it (it's practice!), and I love them all dearly. I'm actually replaying Skyrim so !! Yippee !! I have something to base all this on :D

— 👑

Fucking D E V O U R I N G this I L O V E L O V E L O V E it S O fucking much!!! Assassin!Ree, Werewolf!Ro, Mage!Lo, B A D A S S Bard!Patt, Vamp!Vee, Thief!Jan, A N D Character!Thomas in AUs rep??? Sign me the F U C K up holy shit I N E E D it!!!

[pampulonad]

AGHSNAHANWAGAANAHSNA IM SO NORMAL ABOUT YOUR REPLY TO MY ASK,, @^@""""""""""""

also.. yesterday I spent 4. hours hard (/gender neutral) as fuuuuuuc b/c I ate ice cream + applesauce + fiber gummies + multiple glasses of water + fuit gummi (later in) and it made my belly SO. FUCKING. BIG AND ROOOOUND HOLY SHIT I FELT SO SO SO SEXY,,, I took SOOOOO many pictures of myself in tight clothes, different angles and some mirror pics, and I took some like progression photos ? and I am o b s e s s e d with swiping through them and seeing my belly bloat up bigger and bigger and oh my godddd. my belly was just fucking BULGING and felt sooo HEAVY and FULL and in the pics you can see the band of my lower belly puff up bigger and bigger and,,

hHHH I fucking groped and fondled and grabbed at my teenie littl belly roll and hips and thighs and ass for HOURS and I felt so fucking hot holy shittt I am actually in love with my own body bro I cannot lie ;; I've been trying passively lol to put a little weight on for the past few years, since (a) processing that I was underweight and (b) accepting that I am more attracted to big squishy bodies, b/c I realized I wanted a bigger squishier body

but yeah my tummy is still so so smol but I love it SOOOOOOOOO SO MUCH and I kept moaning that I have the sexiest tummy alive and moaning about my yummy roll(s) and squish and @~@"""""""" moaning that I'm so in love with my body as I made love to it and !!!!!! 🏳️‍⚧️ pleasure and self-intimacy (emotional and physical and sexual and mental and textual and medical and) ftw-

oghF and I haven't even gotten to how sloshy i was,, and later on that band of my lower belly got sooo gurgly~ and I recorded its grumbles and t-o-u-c-h-e-d-m-y-s-e-l-f to the playback and nngh..

and yeah this all took place over 5-6 hours @_@""

mMphhhhhhfUCK I am HORNIEE all over again for how fucking full I felt and how fucking sexy I was and the audio I captured and holy fuckkk I forgor to mention I recorded myself c-u-m-m-i-n-g for the first time (have never captured that before) and it is m e s m e r i z i n g ,, ? ?? I've never actually seen or heard what I'm like when I c-u-m and umhh.. to put it simply itttt VALIDATES the data is collected for 4 hours leading up to it so to summarize the results: in conclusion i am SOOOOOOOOO fucking sexyy,,,, I literally g-o-t off AGAIN to the video of me c-u-m-m-i-n-g in which I ram my fingers into my stomach to make my belly slosh all heavy and =@~@=""" in sync with myself just 30 minutes after..

but umhhh yea I wanted to share,,,, @~@""" I am still thinking about it and sweating profusely-

,.. ps I had some post c-o-i-t-a-l dysphoria afterward that I just distracted from eventually, but y'all got any advice or resources for handling that post-nut clarity? for me i know it's goin to involve some self acceptance, this is my kink and this is what I g-e-t-o-f-f to... i did some soothing affirmative self-talk that it's okay this is what I like and it's okay for me to love myself like this but. yeah if you or anyone has some words of wisdom I'd. take them

~ 💚💛

being comfortable with and loving your body? we love that here. i can confidently say that even with my intense voice dysphoria i still really find myself flushing hard at audios of myself when i jack off.

it’s poetic in a way to know how you sound during such an intimate moment because once you’re able to think and hear it for yourself, it feels so. idk? sexy???? mesmerizing as you put it

also for the last part: if you’re talking like “oh god i got off to this thing” i mostly just go “what the hell. everyone’s got weird shit they get off to and it ain’t right to be shaming others so why shame myself? bit of a double standard buddy” and then move on to whatever i want to do.

i don’t really bathe in the afterglow because my brain is quick to get distracted. the best i can say for handling it is that you are your own worst critic… just fuck yourself safely LOL

[blakeswritingimagines]

Kink list with Solomon

Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He wasn't use to it at all but after some time being with you he'll understand your needs and help the best he can (holding you, praising you, snacks or drinks) didn't like it at first but learned to care for you.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His fucking hands. holy SHIT like whenever you’re giving him head he pulls you away from his cock and he just sticks his fingers in your mouth, like he thinks you’re so fucking attractive sucking on his fingers, then he’ll let you go back to his dick.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Absolutely obsessed with cumming on your face and chest, something about it gets him going again.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He really wants to trying exhibition/voyeurism but with him only watching you and giving you orders he doesn't know if he wants anybody apart of it yet.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

A couple of one night stands but nothing ever actually serious until you do, Pretty much knows what he likes.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Likes to hit it from behind, likes how animalistic and primal it feels and just loves tightly holding your hips.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He's not really goofy per say but when he's trying to fuck you in public he chuckle with you or if your freaking out that someone could catch you he'll laugh.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Due to his own personal likes he's decently groomed and will do the up keep and yes it matches his hair color.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

If it's a special occasion or you ask it of him he'll head on deliver it to you on a sliver platter but on his own time once in a red moon he'll purposely choose a more easy-going time with you.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

When single every once in a while however upon meeting you he'll jerk it to the thought of something you did or wore and normally at his desk or on his bed.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Honestly I think he'd be super into shibari and learns how to make the prettiest ropes, loves seeing you tied up like that and at his mercy

Consensual voyeurism/mutual masturbation watching you get off if he's in the room or not he loves it.

Okay loves fucking you in public and covering your mouth to keep you quite while he absolutely destroys you.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

His room, empty class room, in public, somewhere in Lord Diavolo's castle.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Certain kinda touches he'll give you (his hand on your lower back, wiping off your lower lip).

Listening to you beg and nearly cry for him to touch you.

You trying to make him jealous just gives him all the more reason to go harder on you pretty baby.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Daddy kink, he personally doesn't like it he's more of a sir or master kinda man but if you really like it he'll let you moan it under him.

Scat and oddly enough food play.

Him being the sub or without power while yes you can be on top but you'll never be in charge of him.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Will go down on you and do A damn good job of course but mostly prefers you going down on him especially if your under his desk or under a table where nobody can see you.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He's very in the moment so typically fast and rough he can't help but love how you feel around him but of course if the moment calls for it he can be super sweet and slow.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

After a enough time in devildom and talking to Asmodeus he soon enough learns all the amazing options he has to fuck you in public not just your guys dorm room and will take every chance you give him.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

This is Solomon...of course he wants to take risks however the most risky thing so far was playing around with each other during a movie night with the demon bros.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

I'd like to think 5 rounds some up against the wall, the bed, his desk, in the shower.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Yes things much like rope, ribbons, candles, wands, vibes, everything and more under the non existing sun.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He's relentless on teasing you and gets a sick pleasure at reducing you to a whimpering and crying mess either with him doing too much or not enough.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He's not extremely loud or anything but he will groan, curse, and softly growl under his breath if he's not talking dirty in your ear.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He wants to make a few sex tapes with you especially when you both have to go back home and don't live near each other but he's also thought about making a sex account with you.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

7 and a half inches no more no less and he knows what he's doing.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Pretty well controlled and will/has used his magic to make it lower considering he wasn't interested or with anyone before he didn't see a point for it.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Will take care of you but after that and if your good he'll hold you in his arms and close his eyes unless you tell him that you need something he's not moving.

[arcadiabaytornado]

Live Playing Double Exposure Chapter 1 Part 2 (Except I’m not live playing because I forgot to post this when I was live playing. 😅)

A: Theory: It’s an alternative universe version of Max leaving the polaroids around.

B: I hate the owl imagery given the last time we got owl imagery it was during the barn in the first game.

C: The sound design on this game is great. I don’t know how I feel about the actual songs, but the sound design is great.

D: Safi just…sitting slumped over like that after getting shot was super fucking eerie holy shit.

E: Man. They’re really rubbing Chloe and Max’s “forever” in our noses huh.

F: It’s so sad to know that Chloe and Max were never the same after the storm. I mean, you know they wouldn’t be, but it seemed like they were doing okay in LIS 2. :(

G: “If I could undo your death I would do it without a second thought” I’m going to analyze the hell out of this line later because holy shit it’s crazy for Max to say that.

H: Max’s avoidant tendencies are stressing me out. Don't get wrong they make perfect sense for her characters, but I'm still stressed all the same. Like, PLEASE let people share in your grief. PLEASE talk to Safi's Mother.

I: Max having a dark room made my stomach drop. I know it’s perfectly normal for a photographer to have a room like that, but to see the words “dark room” in a LIS game made my stomach flip. It sure is a character note that it's not a "dark room" "dark room" though, it's more of a laundry room.

J: What??? So Max just saw her friend get murdered and now she's getting dressed up cute for her crush??? I'm glad we get to see Max's house...but that was a...weird scene transition.

K: I have so much to say about the journal, but I'm going to have to make a full post on it because I just can't quickly sum up my feelings here.

L: Okay. So Chloe broke up with Max due to storm trauma basically. Because that’s what I’m taking from this.

M: YEARS. Max and Chloe have been broken up for YEARS?? I can’t think clearly about the timelines right now but does that mean they broke up not to long after LIS 2?

N: “You need to eat Max” I’m won over.

O: “Friend?” The way Max says that is devastating.

P: There’s celestial stuff all over the box! That seems relevant.

Q: I feel Reggie on a spiritual level.

R: I love that you can decide if Max is a tea or coffee drinker. I choose tea!

S: “You’re the real storm.” Max flashbacking to her nightmare. :((((((

T: It feels so cool to see Max’s work around campus. But seeing that Max’s first photo outside of Arcadia was one of a ruined dinner kills me considering she was likely thinking of Joyce and Warren.

U: Did Max just say “chucklefucks” LMAO

V: I feel like this game is going to age poorly given the amount of meme references.

W: Does Max have some chemistry with Vinh or am I insane??

X: Already love Gwen. In fact I’m so in love with her that I found her book in the library immediately, but decided to pick the lock to impress her.

Y: I’m also down to romance Vinh, and I think he’s a love interest? If he is then I’m going with Amanda in this save, but Vinh will get a flirty Max in the other one!

Z: It makes me laugh so hard that you can choose whether Max is ACAB or not.

[nempthis]

Life Update 2023 summary

First of all, last year was complete shit and it's a torture to remember it again right now but for the sake of this blog well, I'm gonna endure it.

J A N U A R Y

- I got accepted at this BPO company that I've been talking about. I worked there for a month until I got sick and was terminated afterwards. Your girl was unemployed for months.

F E B R U A R Y

- After I recovered from being sick, Gek and I went to Pasacao beach for the first time and spent quality time together.

- Also DJ from high school suddenly hit me up but I just ignored it.

- started my online business, sold some pre-loved clothes and Carbonara. It was fun but really challenging

M A R C H

- Van my best friend went for a trip to Europe for 3 months so Gek, Mak and I had to stay together in one apartment without my dad knowing about it. I had to make up a lot of excuses for my dad cuz he's not gonna approve that I was living with 2 men.

- Holy Week? not sure but we got rat infestation here for the first time and ticks from Boris too.

A P R I L

- I started applying for a job and was scheduled for an interview like 2 jobs reached out to me (ADNU and Jollibee) but I didn't show up cuz I got cold feet. (not sure if this was in april, I might be tripping)

- Can't remember shit from this month

- Also started dieting and fasting this month onwards because of you know...

M A Y

- I got hired for a job!!! I went to work on my first day and I didn't feel like working there so after my lunch break, I didn't go back.

- also this might happen in april? I'm tripping again.

- Damn, the apartment got chaotic and awkward because my bff cheated on her man when she was in Europe and I was kinda involved with the drama. That shit was messy, had to deal with it until the both of them moved out.

J U N E

- my bff went back from Europe and she talked with her man and they were fine again but I was left on red notice still and it hasn't been the same for months to come

- I got a job again at this start up company that my bff and I both applied for but spoiler alert, I didn't last long either

J U L Y

- because... I got bullied in this company and my bff told me I was just overreacting but it was so obvious that these fuckers were coming at me. Long story short I lasted for 2 weeks there but I still got paid. Fuck those assholes and C U R S E T H E M.

- took so long to get my period and I was anxious!!! Didn't do it with Gek or anyone but shit was scary when my period was late. Longest cycle ever and it actually affected my performance when I was still working.

A U G U S T

- just unemployed. I barely remember what happened the month.

- probably stayed home ALL THE TIME.

S E P T E M B E R

- Peñafrancia festival just got sad because I had no friends to spend it with unlike the previous year when I used to ride the Vikings with them, this year just hit different.

- Bff and her man finally moved out so my man and I started living together, just the 2 of us.

- Stressed because how the fuck am I gonna pay the rent and bills in my apartment if I was unemployed? but I got it so I am fucking broke right now as we speak.

- Bf resigned from his job to become a delivery man and his schedule was flexible so we spent a lot of time together.

O C T O B E R

- worst fucking month of the year ever

- got a new job again but I lasted for 2 weeks only because I fucked shit up and this experience was probably the worst fucking one cuz literally it broke the remaining spirit I had and paralyzed me to go back in the field again.

- Don't wanna talk about it anymore just FUCK. THIS. MONTH.

N O V E M B E R

- 24th birthday?!?!?! wtf I am old and unemployed again

- still recovering from that hell of experience 💀

- also fuck everyone in that workplace especially Mae Ann fucking fat bitch and Jo soggy tits cunt 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

D E C E M B E R

- Sad Christmas but I bought a round cake and it was the best decision I made the entire year.

- the remaining days of the year were blank and sad and boring. Barely even remember shit

- lol I went shopping for my self-care thing as a gift for myself this Christmas cuz I've had enough bullshit for the entire fucking year.

- and I also binge-watched HxH the entire month on Muse Asia because it was playing on loop so I guess it was a good end of this awful year.

Glad that was over.

That's it. That was my entire year. I got severely sick at the beginning of the year, got unemployed a number of times, got caught up in a drama, relationship with my friends isn't the same anymore, traumatized as fuck and still here. Fuck 2023 and some of the people I met this year. Officially the worst year of my life.

Damn, who would have thought that 2023 was gonna be hell for me? at least the previous year was sort of okay but 2023? NOPE.

[dirtyoldroshi]

20 Twitter mutuals Horny Edition

I figured I'd hornypost about my mutuals on birb app simply because I tend to be horny,, a lot. This is a random order with no numbers so no one can snitch on me

A: The tentacles might be popular with some, but I'll pass.

B: Do not know you well, so no comment

C: Your alter ego is mah buddy! No horny! In RL I know you are taken, so I respecc silently

D Since your partner will likely see this, truth is all I know is a voice. so no thirst.

E. Considering what I now know, no wonder you were a ladies' man back in the day. I do not blame you one bit,

F. Yep, I would subscribe to your OF if i was not so abysmally poor.

G. From the few pics I have seen, you seem quite attractive , though I do not consider myself a potential partner. (I do take spice from all genders though if I know you.. ijs

H. Holy Fuck! I seriously doubt I am your type, but gah-dayum! Curvier than an overly ostentatious 17th century letter writer more thiccer than a snickers. I am glad you do not overly tease in the selfies you post.

I. Yips are a no go. sorry friend

J. Once you spoke of getting a breast job done, if you ever do I want to see them before they are altered and let your husband have exclusive rights to the new ones. I can say this because there is zero chance the showing will happen,

K. All i will say is holy shit I wish I could lewd your avatar.

L. You have stated no lewd and I will honor your wishes

M. You are quite nice looking, Don't let brain goblins convince you otherwise. Roshi likes seeing hooters and owls as well.

N. I wish the affairs of your heart would have gone better for you. You deserve to be happy in that respect

O. The seemingly more serious twin, I felt like I annoyed her somehow. I have no proof of it though. I miss ya.

P. She doesn't know I am weak to eyeglasses. I have quite a bit of thirst for her as I have seen some selfies of her. She states she is aroace so I have no real shot. Even at that I keep my emotions comfy warm toward her. I do genuinely like her.

Q, I only know her from others, no lewdness,

R. I think of her more as a younger sibling. No lewd

S. An artistic hobby mutual

T. Have not seen her face, but the hidden face selfies look nice.

I'm done.

I now await my judgement day.

[asfdhgsdkjhgb]

hello fellow tubbo lore enthusiasts how are we feeling

[starry-blue-echoes]

B R O

WIEUHFBVJAEHBFJAWBHFJBAHWFBCAUWFBCUAWFUAWNFUANWUBCFAUJVBCAJUBVUAHSZ CHAAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA SRGKJVBSEKJFBAKWF O U GH THEY ESFJNAJKWNFJNWQ

I WILL JAVE YOU KNOW IM STIMNG WAY TO MUCH TO TYPE RIGTHA WEHJZGSBFJWHAEBGJKBGFJKE

THEY'RE SO FUCKING BE A UT I FU L AND THE COLORS AND THE SQUAD AND THE HGS AND KISSES AND THE W E D D I NG RINGS AND OUT IF TS

holy shit this is absolutel incredible, I'm grinning like ana bsolute madman right now this has 100% made my day it's GORGOUS and you're now getting my exact thoughts on every single picture because I'm so mentally ill about this

first off, I'm in LOVE with Hol's design. You've blended his origional deisgn so well with the new elements and I'm positively smitten with the coat you gave him, and I can only guess you somehow managed to make your way into my draft notes because I was also thinking of giving him a coat. All the details are so pretty and nice and go together, and I went just a little more insane when I realized you gave him one of Pol's wrist bands

anD WITH THE SECOND HO FUCKING BOY IT? IS SO SOFT??? AND WHOLESOME?????? THE WAY THEY'RE HOLDING EACHOTHER???????? Not to mention the R I N G S and the way their pinkies are linked, he's just his silly little cabbage and also that's canon now as well, and I'm getting cavities just looking at it. And ofc, the beautiful addition of bruabba in the bottom <3

third off FUCK YEAH THAT'S HIS DAUGHTER :DDDDD Trish looks gorous as always <3 and the doodles with the Pistols are also perfect, they're just silly little guys who Hol probably gets attached to, and if he wants to lend them the Emperor well then who's he to stop them from causing insanity. And erjbvsjrbv the nicotine thing with Bucciarati is hilarious, and the collection of everybody is adorable

AND THE FUCKING. O U GH. THE WEDDING CLOTHES. JRBGEJABGEBGV R A W GH IM PUTTING THEM IN MY MOUTH AND BITTING THEM, I WANT TO EAT YOUR ART STYLE IT'S SO PRETTY AND HAPPY AND WHOLESOME AND THEY FUCKING LOVE EACHOTHER AND O U G H

okay. I'm normal now :> I hope your day is as good as mine has become upon seeing this art :>

ELEMENT OF SURPRISE- 💥

Even more au doodles because I have way too much free time.

This time around 🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁 Anti-Power Couple Au 🎉🎉🎉🎉 (by @starry-blue-echoes)

I think my Hol Horse bias is showing-

Anyway cute Holpol nonsense YIPPEEEE (click for better quality)

I simultaneously love and hate the design I made for him. Cause on one hand I think he looks cool as hell but on the other he has so many details the amount of times I forgot his ear piercing/braid/stubble/bullet necklace/strings on his hat/wedding ring/which side the wrist bands went on is low-key ridiculous and completely my own fault 💀/silly

These are the best hands I've ever drawn in my life ngl.

Fun fact: "Mon petit chou" with no context means "my little cabbage" when directly translated to English. Because you know if Polnareff is gonna call Hol a French pet name it's gonna be something simultaneously rly sweet in French but wack in English NSNDNNDD

There's more context than that behind why "my little cabbage" is considered a French term of endearment but that's an info dump for another day 😭

I don't have much to say for this one other than the doddle of one of the Sex Pistols holding Emperor is one of my favorite things and I'm using it as a reaction image now.

HOLPOL WEDDING

I wish I could have done more with their outfits but I just didn't have the time to design anything rly unique 😭.

I genuinely hope the random huge drops of fanart aren't overwhelming or anything for ya- I just get in a flow of doin em and don't realize how much I've done until I've ran out of scenarios to draw :') wish ya the best ✌️/gen

[inkyquince]

Always hated the term work husband but...

content warning. cucking, cheating, general backstabbing your spouse. Distant spouses, m a r r i e d t o l e i g h t o n, age gap, saucy photo taking, free use pc for bailey.

Married to Remy but work husband Avery likes to take you out for long dinners to discuss the business in the first half but whispering in your ear with his hand on your thigh in the latter half. Books a hotel room while you're on the phone to Remy that it's too dark and you'll stay in town that night.

Or even the reverse. Married to Avery whose married to his job so you spend more and more time at your own job, helping out at the riding school until you get your own work husband in Remy. Stablehands giggle that it's not the dogs spooking the horses up in the hayloft.

Also, just saying, flirty Wren complimenting his boss' spouse and cheekily inviting them to his card games, just because when Remy ain't at the ranch, then he's at his farm, and when he's not at either, his face down sleeping. Wren is gonna get shot for ogling you and smugly leading you to your shared room with Remy just to make your bed a bit messy, but yknow, if he's not dying hard, he's not dying.

This will be a punch to the balls, but husband Leighton (Ew. I'd fuck him, wouldn't marry him) and work husband Daryl. The club owner didn't even start all of this because your husband was their abuser, and most probably yours too by the age gap, but you're so sweet and nice and wanted to invest in his club. Also punching perverts does make Daryl flustered. You're just too nice, too soft, too good for that piece of shit and before too long Daryl needs you over to take up some of his duties, just so he can see you more and hear your laugh and feel your lips curve upwards against his when he bumps into you in the stock room and has to give into his urges. Leighton doesn't notice your absence for a while not gonna lie.

I won't even think about the reverse, if anyone cucked Daryl for Leighton, I'll sue.

Not really work husband but another kick to the Leighton nuts, Mason offering to teach you how to swim and having internal meltdowns because Holy Shit I'm Going To Get Fired For This, while he has you up against the swimming pool edge.

Niki runs you ragged between setting up shoots with his models, with weddings and events needed their photographer, not to mention the quiet photoshoots that stretch into the evening for just the two of you. Of course Niki will have his nuts twisted right off if Quinn ever found those very risque photos of his spouse.

Speaking about Quinn, B a i l e y. Mans obviously has Quinn in his pocket, so why can't he borrow his spouse for a fuck or two when he's particularly stressed. Sends you back home with a red handprint on your ass and cum running down your thighs. AGAIN, not work husband but definitely forcibly-loaned-out-by-your-husband.

I've met Quinn once in game and I want him fucking miserable.

Anyway, I should get back to cohesive writing, huh?

Edit: IM A FOOL

I FORGOT

THE ONLY BOY

WREN

Have Included him now but I HAVE LET EVERYONE DOWN

also I do like the thought that Eden cucks them all... Because yknow. It's Eden.