#hobbie x Reader

[manluvers]

JUST A FANTASY

hobbie brown x afab!reader

cw : smut, 18+ , p n v , pussy eating, blowjob , public sex(etc.)

wc: 4,079

A/n: never did one of these before so I hope y’all enjoy!

Just another one of your fantasies of hobbie, what could go wrong?

just a fantasy you say in your head. Just a fantasy. The fantasy in question is what got you touching in the first place .

as days pass your cunt ached for hobbie. You needed him so badly you started to fantasize at hq.. bad idea. You dreamt of shopping with hobbie. Him buying you skirts and band tees(etc) going into the changing rooms just to get railed up. His length throbbing while watching you undress infront of him.. he couldn’t help himself any longer as soon as you took your pants off he immediately grabbed you by your waist.

Moving your underwear out the way while pulling down his pants. As soon as he did that he started fucking you at a rapid pace. “Comon luv you can take my cock can’t you?” he says like you had a choice . Letting out muffled moans from his large hand on your mouth to make sure that no one could hear how much of a slut your being for him. That’s what got him going.

Seeing how only he can make you this wet.. until you remembered it was only a fantasy and that you were a hq until you heard a “helo luv” hobbie says as he walks up to you. Quickly removing your hand from your slick wet cunt and placing it by your side “hi hobbie” you said smiling. Him looking at you confused.. he sees your out of breath and decides to take you home.

After opening the portal to your bedroom, both of you step in and relax. “sooo” you say awkwardly “yes luv?” hobbie says making eye contact with you. Feeling your cunt getting even wetter from this and you lean into his ear and whisper “I need you so fucking bad hobbie~” as you go down on him kissing his bulge through his pants.

“Atta Girl” he says gripping your hair and holding your head up as he undos his belt and pulls don’t his pants a boxers as his length hits you in the face pulsing, as the tip leaks precum. Licking up from the base to the tip slightly teasing the slit to hear his groans from it. Quickly bobbing your head up and down his cock, making wet slurping sounds as you keep going.

Hobbie thrusting into your warm mouth to the bobbing motion, even keeping your head all the way down as he cums down your pretty throat that always makes him feel good. But this time he knew he had to make you feel good, by getting on his knees and rubbing the fabric against ur wet cunt teasing you.

Pulling off your silk panties with haste he licks your cilt while sticking his middle finger in your wet aching hole. This made you feel amazing.. and he knew it. Pulling out his finger and replacing it with his tongue.. eating you out while you moan his name so eagerly wanting to cum. “please.. hobbie Please lemme cum it’s t’much” you say while gripping his hair “you taste so good luv” he says in a hum while you feel a knot in your stomach.. your close. And he knows it.

As he continues eating you out while using his thumb to play with your cilt.. his hard work payed off. You came..! He lapped up the juices like he hasn’t had water in the past year. As you ride out your high he stood up and puts you in a mating press. His favorite position to breed your tight little cunt with his seed. He teases the hole with his tip and slowly pushes in.. your legs already shaking from your high. “hobbie wait-“ it’s already to late he’s inside of you and already thrusting.. he gets more eager as he hears you moan his name.. with every thrust “ahn!~ hobbie” “oh fuck hobbie” “hobbie I can’t take it I can’t-” he smirks “ofc you can doll you can take my cock can’t you?” He says as your cunt grips his cock with his every move.

“Oh fuck, I’m close sweetheart “ he says as his tip kisses your good spot making you throw your head back and yell out his name “oh oh hobbie ! I’m cumming!!” You say cumming around his cock as you feel him twitch inside of you.. he paints your insides white. Both of you panting he runs a bath and praises you with kisses all over you

“You did so good for me doll” ask he says making your heart flutter “so fucking good for me” planting another kiss on you. Now you knew how much hobbie loved you.. you loved him back

“I love you princess “

“I love you too bee”

part 2

[qtkoshi]

listen there are some beautiful hobbie fics out there, and i am extremely happy to see other ppl hyped ab him;

but there is simply not enough.

IK THERES MORE OF Y’ALL. BE WHO U R AND COME OUT WITH UR BEAUTIFUL WRITING ‼️‼️‼️‼️

[isagispuzzle]

rin shows his love for you in little ways.

everyone knows rin has a rigid routine he sticks to everyday without fail. he wakes up at six, takes a deep breath, stretches, and meditates before he starts on whatever he has to work on that day. at night, he revises soccer strategies, meditates again, drinks a glass of water, and goes to bed at eleven. rin believes his routine is the basis of his success in soccer, and thinks he'll never change it for the world.

but when you enter the picture, he finds himself staying in bed just five minutes longer to bask in your warmth a little more and preparing breakfast for you after his morning yoga. when he's home from training, he runs the bath for you to use before him, cuts fruit after dinner to share with you, and meditates with your hand in his.

you know rin loves you through the little things he does for you, but to rin, his love for you is enough to take apart his routine and piece it back together around you, even if it could cost him everything he's done for soccer thus far.

[yaamatic]

So...the new event, huh?

[ghouldtime]

Neighbor! König Part 2

Part One

Part Three

After you expressed interest in his miniature collection, he actually actively OFFICIALLY invited you over one evening (and inside!)

It may not sound like much to most to be invited into someone's house but for him, it's the ultimate trust. His house is his private space, his sanctuary, where he goes to be without other people

He doesn't ever invite anyone inside unless necessary or they've truly gained his trust and being invited INTO his house, and actually into a shared space of one of the hobbies that matter the most to him?? Yeah, that's how he says he likes you

He's been working on his models and dioramas for so so long he's incredibly proud and can't help but to want to actually show them off to someone who wants to see

Usually most people don't care :( or think it's weird

But you've embraced it! You're so excited and he's over the moon, he's having the best day ever, if you do research and bring him gifts or show him some new ideas

He has exquisite attention to detail and INSISTS on everything being exactly the way he envisions it. And you notice! You actually notice. Which means you care about his hobbies, the work he puts in, and therefore him

It might be a bit early to say the L word but he's feeling certain ways

He may be a big dude but that doesn't mean he lacks fine motor skills. He's laying those tiny pieces of moss onto the cobble stones like a PRO

Miniatures allow him control over the environment, even if it's on a smaller scale, and offer a way to keep his hands and mind busy so he often throws himself into it

It also helps him relive happier memories. He's afraid of forgetting them and when he's stressing, it's his happy place because he can look at them and simply remember the things in life that matter

He'll ask you about a story you like or a favorite show or book or movie. That's his next miniature planned (in secret. Can't ruin the surprise, he needs to have it all perfect. He will either read the book, watch the movie, will study EVERY detail)

He will start to invite you over when he's having a painting night or is working on them. You don't have to follow his rules or do what he wants! He's just happy you're there and appreciating it

He will always have your favorite snacks and drinks in stock too. Need to make it fun and can't have you going hungry

If you want, he'll put on background noise! He's happy to make it immersive and to light a candle or put something in a diffuser to really set the scene you're going for. But he's perfectly happy to hangout with you as is

You'll finally get to hear him laugh and hear his really, really bad jokes. He has a dry sense of humor and most of what he says isn't even close to funny, he's awkward like that

But if you laugh? That's it, he's sold.

Time flies so fast when you're over, you don't even realize it's 3am

You don't need to go home! I know it's right across the street but he has a guest room and it saves you the trip in the morning. You have a whole nother round of characters to paint :)

Okay maybe it was an excuse so you could see the curtains he'd made and the pillows and he decorated the guest room with! Like actually tried decorating. They're made with love, that's what counts right?

Did he spray the pillows with his cologne before you came over? Maybe, but he won't ever admit to it

You can't complain. Not when he insists it's no trouble at all, you should stay over, and he does everything he can to make you comfortable.

And you're certainly not complaining when you wake up to breakfast in bed

He's so happy to finally have someone to share his life with, even if it's nothing official. He might not say it because words are hard, but he'll always show it in every way that he can 💚

If you look closely at the replica he made of his childhood home, you'll notice two figures in the kitchen who just so happen to look like you and him

Proud believer of König being just a guy! A guy with hobbies! A guy with a calm domestic life! Just because he's a private military contractor doesn't mean he's a constantly violent dude or a guy who lacks an immense amount of respect for boundaries. Sure, he gets really into his job when he does it, but that's his realm! That's his zone. That's why he's confident and having fun, he knows he's good

Outside of work, he's just a guy with a troubled childhood making the best of life and trying to find his own sense of belonging, happiness, and peace

Justice for König, he's not an insane perv or some freakytron or some stalker :(

[blughxreader]

Do you think Damian acts more childlike to gain more affection from batsis?

platonic yandere! Damian Wayne... HC. he's 13-15 y/o

yeah 100%. He might not even know he's doing it.

I bet it's hard to untangle himself from his co-worker relationship with his father and siblings. Damian always has to be on-guard around them to maintain his competent and reliable appearance, even if he's very comfortable with being his true self. Accidents like spilling tea or tripping are just slightly more embarrassing for this reason.

However Damian doesn't have to worry about being capable around you. His only relationship with you is little brother and big sister, which has implications that he can be as needy and undignified as he wants.

Yes, he's a trained assassin and vigilante, but you don't care about his tactical prowess. Your world revolves around whether to have tea or coffee, what to draw, which new show to watch, (how to cut off the tracker on your wrist, where the surveillance cameras are facing, has your food been tampered with).

So Damian does away with all pretenses and finally acts his age. He doesn't want to impress you as a soldier, he wants to impress you as a little brother.

He needs to be held! He has to watch the birds with you before school. Your attention must be on him instead of his siblings.

Look at this beautiful portrait he painted of you--aren't you proud? Look, he booby-trapped Tim's apartment so he'll be late for dinner, now the two of you have 17 more minutes of alone time, isn't that great? Now hug me hug me hug me hug me hug me hug me please please please please please please

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

-> people stealing, binding and selling fics on Etsy, risking everything that AO3 has built since the Anne Rice lawsuits

-> AI scraping being everywhere and Gen Z seeing nothing wrong with using AI to "help" fanfiction or outright "write it" for them, while older fanfic authors have struggled for years to perfect the style you love

-> comments being down across the board and consumption culture being at an all time high. a fic gets 800 notes practically overnight and doesn't get a single comment (and sometimes I literally have to beg for comments/feedback on my fics when I know that hundreds of people are reading them)

-> me, grinding my teeth while pouring my heart and soul into a 40k fic that I know will be forgotten by fandom in a month or could possibly be stolen to be sold as a "novel": I do this because I love this. I do this because I love this. I do this because it's my passion. I don't want to quit doing something that I love so much.

[satorusluver]

Minors DNI

Can't stop won't stop I'm hyperfixating.

Boyfriend Gojo Satoru who sees cumming in you as giving you his love. Letting him cum in you is such an act of trust and he sees it as the ultimate form of intimacy.

Even though he knows you're on birth control and have virtually no chance of having his baby, he can't help but love the idea of your womb being full of his cum, full of his seed. In his mind it marks you as his.

One time when he found out a coworker had been flirting with you, he fucked you right before you left for work. Didn't matter that you were fully dressed already, he just hiked your skirt up, pulled your panties aside and fucked you right up against the kitchen counter, his fat cock stuffing you full until you came all over it and he came in you, shooting thick ropes of cum as deeply as he could. Then he pulled out and readjusted your underwear, knowing damn well you'd be leaking his fluid onto them throughout the work day.

Sometimes he'll even choose to stay perfectly still when he cums in you because "want you to feel it, baby." He'll grip your waist tight and push all the way in until the tip of his dick kisses your cervix and then he'll cum hard, not moving a muscle so you can feel how his dick twitches with every spurt of thick, hot seed that floods your womb.

"You feel how much I love you, baby?"

[airrain]

Im so normal about him‼️

[julia4today]

cozy glow fluff

(hobie x pink!reader) — fem prns..?

hobie, the rule breaking, cop hating, spider-punk. he goes around spraypainting walls, or beating some evil villain. that or he’s being told off by miguel for his “disrespectful” behavior. AKA he was telling the truth and miguel doesn’t seem to appreciate honesty as much as hobart does.

maybe people expect him to have a girlfriend just as punk as him. maybe they don’t expect a girlfriend at all.

————

last night had been a long one. he had just gotten home from a mission with gwendy. he had some scrapes and bruises so he was forced to go to the medical center. he hated being told to do things, especially go to the medical center. it was so sterile, so void of life. and could definitely use a new paint job.

he had missed band practice which means having his phone blown up about their upcoming gig and how it was the 4th time that month he’d “skipped” practicing.

as he swung through the city all he could think of was you. all he could think of was the way you smelt like sugar cookies and rainy days. he dodged building after building, soon his eyes focusing on the apartment ahead. only one room illuminated.

only one room with that familiar cozy glow that he came to appreciate oh so much. as he approached the edifice, his eyes trained on the dusty bricks, and the chipping paint of the window sill that he had glued himself against, climbing the side of the structure.

he pryed open the window, a loud creaking noise ensuing. he winced slightly, hoping that if you were sleeping, you hadn’t woken up. he crawled into the kitchen, inhaling at your aroma that snuck its way throughout the flat.

he scanned the space, he saw the muffins you had left on the stove top. he grabbed one as he snuck towards your bedroom. noting the usual decorations as well as some new ones. pictures of him, in a pink frame of course. he ran his fingers over it, reminiscing on the memory, one from a week prior. you had convinced hobie to go to a fair.

the both of you had a wonderful time then, even if he was reluctant to admit it. you accepted this and was proud that he stepped out of his comfort zone while also managing not to steal.

curse you and your sickeningly sweet smile that makes him forget how horrible the system is. don’t worry, he made some ruckus the next day to make up for the loss. as his eyes grew heavy he reached for the handle of your door.

the door opened with a loud moan of the hinges. the list on your fridge of things to fix in your house obviously not helping. glancing at the clock, he read the time. 2 am. he mentally cursed himself for coming to see you that late, but really who could blame him.

most see hobie as a ruffian who only causes uproar and disharmony. but you saw him as much more. he was able to be himself with you. he allowed himself to let you in, to see all his insecurities that weren’t open to the rest of the world.

he glanced back at you, snuggled up in a pink blanket and your hello kitty pajamas. both of which he bought (stole) for you (but he wouldn’t tell you that he actually stole it). the light still shining dimly, he chuckled, knowing you had probably stayed up waiting for him.

he soon discarded the majority of his clothes and climbed into bed next to you. your figure tossing and turning, your breath changing before restoring back to a soft snore. you found it embarrassing that you snore, he found it adorable and made sure to reassure you of that. and also to remind you that insecurity is another way the government divides us so we can’t band together and overthrow it.

reaching over he turned off the light. his black shirt contrasting with the rosy color of your linens. he wraps his arms around you, which you quickly oblige. snuggling closer into his chest.

“love ‘ya doe.” he had begun calling you doe when you first met, it was to point out your innocence which soon became something he treasured most about you. although he did appreciate your tenacity when protesting. you could definitely overthrow one hell of a government all on your own when you were angry.

“mm love you too,” you said sleepily, only mildly drooling on hobie. you fell back asleep as quick as you woke up. he smiled and rested his chin on top your head.

closing his eyes and falling asleep.

—————

okay first fic what do we think? do you want more hobie? or maybe something with miguel??? i have a whole list of ideas but i’d love some more!! pls pls request something you want to see and i’ll add it to the list.

reblogs much appreciated, feel free to message me 🩷

[manluvers]

a/n: this post is dedicated to my frien rwibbonss on insta bc she has gave me this idea for hobbie !!!! So hope u enjoy this is fluff btw :)

cw: kissing, towering, and praises

as you stood at a 5’1 hobbie was 5’11 , very big height difference.

You love how he towers over you, placing soft kisses on your forehead. Having to stand in your tippy toes just to grasp him and his lips to yours.

His cheeky smile as you struggle. “Your so cute doll” he loves how short you are, and he also love how he can pick you up! Literally just picking you up in one swift motion so easily.

You love hobbie. You’d do anything for this man, even if he says he’ll do it. You’ll still do it anyways, he loves it when your stubborn and he kisses your cheeks until you form a smile.

“Comon luv you can’t stay mad at me forever.. not unless I do this!” He says while picking you up as you left out a shocked gasp while he holds you tight in his arms.

“Yknow I love you princess, doll, my baby, mines, I’m so happy your mines” he says between each kiss he plants on you, holding you close hoping you’ll never leave him..

“I love you too hobs” you say you can never be mad at this man.. he’s basically the love of your life !

[leviraaaaaa]

𝘔𝘦𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭

𝘞𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘴, 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵e𝘭𝘭

Levi let out a sigh of relief the moment your silhouette appeared through the shadows, tensed shoulders relaxing. He turned his head, all focus shifting instantly to you.

“You.” He exhaled, a hint of exasperation in his tone, indicating that the little time spent without your absence had not been very fun. “Where have you been?”

“Hi. Went to scout.” You answered, reaching the little campfire to stand beside Levi. All your friends sat circling it. Levi’s subtle, not very subtle eagerness at your arrival seemed to have triggered something, making the already guffawing crowd of people laugh even harder. Concluded with Levi’s sour face, it wasn’t very hard to guess what the subject of amusement must have been.

“Oh, are we bullying Levi again?” You beamed, nudging Levi’s leg with your foot, signaling him to give you space. “Scoot over. I want to join too.”

Levi shot a glare, but shifted to let you sit beside him. As another wave of laugher sparked through your friends, you plopped down on the grass, folding your legs. It was a chilly night, and everyone wanted to stay near the fire, therefore, the circle was so tightly formed around the fire, you could barely squeeze yourself between Levi and Nifa.

“Sit on my lap, why don’t you?” Levi grumbled, scowling and squirming a little at the close contact.

“What? It’s cold. And you’re warm.” You said as you sat down. “What are you so pissy for anyways?” You pressed yourself tighter, curling yourself up against him, uncaring of the poisonous gaze. You’ve learnt a long ago, half of Levi's words didn’t mean shit, that if he actually was uncomfortable, you wouldn’t even be here right now, he would’ve broken a bone or two. Levi’s personal space wasn’t something he let anyone come through, but you’ve been an exception for that for a long time.

And he was warm. A warmth that surprisingly only the cold, cold man was capable of.

And as always, the low protest died soon and he adjusted to let you lean against him.

“Hange.” He muttered, answering your previous question. “They’re trying to convince people to marry me.”

“Wonderful.” You grinned, “I volunteer.”

“I hate you.”

Cue for a very drunk Hange cracking up again, leading the others to join in. Even Erwin, ever regal and solemn, couldn’t seem to be able to hold the small smile from forming. With Hange’s contagious laughter and Levi’s scowl, it was impossible to.

“Oh why’d you let Hange drink again?” You laughed, watching them as Moblit struggled, trying to pry the bottle out of the section commander's grasp. “They're gonna be terrible to deal with tomorrow.”

“They insisted it was one sip.” Erwin said solemnly.

“Well, that sure seems like one sip.”

“But seriously though,” Nanaba piped in, shoulders still shaking with the waves of laughter. “Levi’s got all that spunk, but no bitches.”

“Stubborn shortie-” Hange's voice was cut of as they hiccupped

“Shut up. All of you. Please.” Levi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “

“Point stands. In your mid-thirties, Levi. How long are you going to wait?”

“Why,” He huffed. “Are you people so insistent on analyzing my personal life every damn time? Do you not have anything better to do?”

“Only well wishers.” She gave him a smug smile. “That’s what friends do, they care for each other.”

“No. You just want to give me shit.”

“Well, that too.” She shrugged.

“Iffff—if anything,” Hange stumbled in, rubbing their eyes. She glanced at you pointedly. “You could at least date her. That’d be nice.”

“So I keep telling him.” You feigned a disappointed sigh.

“Don’t fucking egg them on.” He hissed, face heating up at the suggestion. How could they even think it’d work out? He thinks, against the thoughts tugging. Ridiculous. They were ridiculous. You were just as ridiculous. So what does he do with this ridiculous fucking feelin–

“Oh but look,” Hange leaned forward, squinting to watch the two of you, their glasses reflecting off the fire and casting shadows on their face. “ Do mine eyes deceive me or is Ackerman over there blushing?”

“No.” The denial was quick. A little too quick.

“I confirm.” Nanaba smirked. Miche grunted.

“No.”

“Oh, Levi.” Erwin’s eyes glimmered amusement.

“I will hit you. Don’t even go there.”

The roar of laughter only grew louder.

And the night rolled on, the nonsense bickerings and banters continued. Friendly faces and friendly voices, joking and teasing and laughing without a care in the world. Bottles clinked, the firelight glinting on them. At one point, you and Hange started singing some stupid song you’ve heard in the fair, rocking back and forth with the music. And you weren’t certain, but you could swear there was a hint of melody even in the wind blowing by. And it was cold, but with Levi beside you, you were okay. But that was okay, it was okay. More than okay, really. The happiness was overwhelming.

.

“You know,” Hange called out suddenly. They had taken to fully sprawl out on the grass. They’d been quiet a while, and you had thought they must’ve passed out, but appears not.

Everyone turned to look at them.

“This is nice isn’t it?” They mumbled, blinking up to the sky. “I mean, sure, we might die tomorrow, but this is nice. I wouldn’t really mind dying.”

“You know, what would’ve been nice, Hange?” Nanaba said, watching Hange. And despite the words itself, she was smiling. “To not mention death.”

“I know but,” Hange sat up, grinning. “This is not too bad as a last night of your life right? I wouldn’t mind.”

And for a second, no one spoke. Perhaps, it was because all were drunk more or less but that hit harder in that moment. Unsaid words were spoken in silence, the wind carrying the oaths away. And even Levi’s eyes had softened.

Only Hange could say words like that with that face, you thought. You weren’t sad, not really. Because Hange was right. Being a scout meant learning to appreciate every breath you can take, and nights like this were as good as they’d come.

“Aww Hange.” You sighed, grinning back. “Cheesy much? You’re making Levi all squirmy.”

“No, I am not—” Levi’s protests were buried as the group jumped in yet again another session of Levi leg-pulling.

But despite it all, Levi thought.

Pissheads, all of them were. But nevertheless.

He watched you with the corner of his eyes, watching you as you laughed your head off to something Eld said, shoulders shaking, the firelight making your eyes glitter. And you were so close, so close, he could hardly breathe. And the urge to wrap an arm around you, to pull you closer. To feel you against him.Would that be so wrong of him? If he leaned close, would you pull away? But it’s okay, he thinks.

Hange was right.

It’s okay if he dies tomorrow. He wouldn’t really mind.

He didn’t really mind right now either.

He finds it strange that he didn’t really mind it. Any of it.

He didn’t mind Hange or Nanaba or any of them.

He didn’t mind your stupid little jokes, clearly made with the intention to piss him off. He didn’t really mind that you were so close. He didn’t mind that your head on his shoulder. He didn’t mind a lot of things that he thinks he would’ve minded if it was anyone else but you.

He doesn’t really know how it works. He doesn’t like thinking about the strange little feelings in his heart that tugged everytime you smiled, or the way his stomach tightened whenever you flirted with him so casually.

And maybe one day he’ll tell you. Maybe he won’t

Does it matter? Is it not enough to only have you alive and close?

He’s here now. With everyone and with you.

He’s home.

[threepandas]

Bad End: For Us

My sister is the only one who actually knows me. Who looks at me and... and actually SEES me, for who I am. It's because she suffers too, I think. Is beautiful. In that way that drives men too distraction. Poets too the page, artists too a medium. They look at her like she is art, magnificence and beauty given form.

Not a person.

Living, breathing, with thoughts and feelings of her own.

She is... is just BEAUTY to them. Delicate features and graceful limbs. Refined and splendid. A lovely voice reducing all her brilliant thoughts to mere sound. Who cares? How clever and educated, how wise or dignified, she may be? She is decoration. A pretty thing to look at. A prize to be held and won.

And... and I am a cute little pet.

Eternally the toddler, to be pampered and dressed in bows. Girlish things, no matter how old I grow. Handled instead of spoken too. Because somehow I am a child. Fuckable, yet... a child. Cute, innocent, naive. Not because I AM, but because they SAY so. Because it matches their fantasy of me.

I fear what will happen if I dare break that fantasy, with how much they control my life.

My Sister, alone, is the one who SEES me.

And people try to convince me she is... what? Jealous? Bitter? Because I am somehow "stealing" the lecherous eyes of her unfaithful man? I don't want them. I don't want ANY of them. Reborn, somehow, as a Protagonist in some game amongst countless, I can predict the plot points as they come. Read the troupes.

Bah. I am no spunky little bright eyed thing.

As I lay, draped over my sister's splendid skirts, in her private writing room, she quietly sips her tea and writes return missives. Strokes my hair as I hide, curled up like a child against her legs. If the ridiculous outfit I was shoved in would allow it? I would cram myself under her desk. Hide there instead.

As it is? I sit like some sulking maiden, an exhausted pet, seeking comfort in the only refuge I HAVE.

They will not leave me ALONE.

The Knight. Some brash, meat headed, "I'll take care of you" type, crashing into every quiet moment I try to have. Loud and presumptuous. Disdainful of my academic interests.

The Playboy. All too forward "romantic" gestures and ignoring obvious discomfort. More wrapped up in HIS feelings then considering, for even a moment, my own. Selfish and dramatic.

The Duke. Cliché and terrible. "Kind" to no one but me. Endless expensive gifts, pressuring grand displays, and eyes that linger possessively. Violence at the drop of a hat.

But oh, let us not forget the ASSASSIN! Yes, the LEADER of the ASSASSIN'S Guild! That somehow, someway, decided I was a prize worth possessing. A cutesy little "interesting" doll. That? Gods only knows, what will happen when he grows bored.

Lingering and haunting me. Crawling through windows. Standing too close, to touch my hair and drop cryptic bits of information that always hint at terrible things. Having to watch my words so SO carefully. Lest someone end up DEAD.

And let's not forget the WORST offender! The most clingy of them ALL!

My sister's FIANCÉ.

The Crown PRINCE! Yes, not some average noble, but a ROYAL!! And the man can't CONTROL himself! But does anyone else care? Noooooo! It's ROMANTIC. True loooove~! Aren't we CUTE together? Surely my Sister, his FIANCÉE, is just JEALOUS. How VILE. Disgusting, they scoff!

I should start throwing chairs.

This house is a nightmare.

I curl closer to my sister. Releasing her skirts to slip an arm around her waist. Hugging her, pressing my face close. She puts her cup down with a soft clink. A second hand joining the first to stroke my head. Cup my cheeks.

"My Dearest, you can not hide against my skirts indefinitely. As much as I would love to let you." She says, voice soft and cool like swirling mist, tilting my face up so she can look me in the eyes. "You DO need to eat eventually, as do I. Unfortunately, I can not keep you here forever. Come, help me plan the wedding. We can look at cake styles."

I'd rather be planning a funeral.

"Not until I get a son out of him, I'm afraid."

Wut.

I blink, not sure I heard that right. Look up at my softly smile sister. No. No, I probably didn't. Wishful thinking maybe? Or I've just been around Stabby too much. I scramble to my feet. Fighting my own girlish abomination of a skirt. I hate it. It's cutesy to the point of mocking. I'm in my TWENTIES for God's sake! Not EARLY twenties either!

Why do I have a BOW ON MY ASS?!

Because I am the Protagonist. Baby faced and Pwecious~☆. Fucking INFANTALIZED. I could BITE.

I sigh, take the arm my sister offers me, and tuck myself into her side. Rest my head upon her shoulder. It's a little uncomfortable, with all the jewelry she must wear. But damn it! I want my cuddles!

I bask, as we walk, in the comfort it brings.

She's strong and graceful. Smells like a delicate spring morning, all rare flowers and new growth. A hint of expensive spice. I LOVE being the little sibling. When it's HER that's treating me so. Because she makes it precious. Comfortable. Like we could spend our lives, together like this. The best of friends.

Happy.

If only people would... you know... stop trying to FUCK me. I prefer my hobbies. For God's sake, I'm RICH and a second child. I HAVE basicly no responsibilities except "don't embarrass the family". Or that WOULD be the case? If our parents weren't so intent on... "pushy dating advice".

"Would you like some lovely news, Dearest?" Whispers my sister, as she sweeps us past some upset looking maids, towards the tea room. I nod. "I've made some wonderful headway with some... ambitious gentlemen, about your little cockroach problem. They are quite efficient. I'm likely to recommend them."

I stiffle a snort. Oh my god. My sister sent thugs after a few of the suitors? Holy shit! That's amazing! Is THAT why I haven't seen them around lately? They got scared?

We settle in our seats. Tea and snacks. The maid looks... nervous. Weird. My sister smiles kindly, somehow startling the poor thing, making her flinch. Oh dear. I try to smile reassuringly. No harm no foul, right? Yet the poor girl reacts like I've cast myself into a lion pit for her. Flees.

....I'm beginning to suspect someone is abusing our waitstaff.

It's probably that bastard lech of a fiance.

We need to keep him away from the maids. And me. Women in general honesty. If I had my say, he wouldn't be allowed near my SISTER either. But she insists, and- Oooh! This one's CUTE! Sis, Sis! LOOK at the little details on this one!

"Hmm? Oh that IS lovely! Do you like it? If so, we shall sample it at once. I want the day to be perfect for us, Dearest. You're my world after all. There's NOTHING I wouldn't give you. A shame though, that our parent's will likely be too sick to see me wed."

It really was. I had my differences with them, but... it was their DAUGHTER'S WEDDING you know? Whatever they had caught, during their endless string of parties, was ravaging their health. It seemed agonizing. Slow. Yet even in the midst of planning her WEDDING, all the gossip and backstabbing, my sister dutifully visited them. Brought them tea and kept them company.

I didn't know how she could bear it.

She was a better person then I, I guess.

[vhoorlpool]

sorry boss! can’t work today. too busy thinking about an overprotective zombie lover that coats you in his blood to keep other zombies away.

nsfw under the cut!! (o^^o)

it’s ritualistic. he’ll rub up against you, cheek to cheek or chest to your back as he runs his bloodstained hands over your body. he knows he’s practically feeling you up, but… you’re just so soft and cute :( he can’t help it!! he’ll keep you tucked against his side as you traverse through the hoarde; glares pointed in every which way towards his brethren. you’re his. and he won’t hesitate to tear anyone who harms a single hair on your head limb from limb, whether it be dead or alive.

he’s got a hideaway already set up for you the moment you agree to be his, tucked away from the rest of the world post-apocalypse; filled with as many rations as he could find. humans can’t eat brains like he can, much to his dismay, but that’s okay! he loves you regardless. you want canned fruit? okay, hold on. freeze dried ice cream? come here, darling, we’ll search for some. though he’s not letting you go anywhere until you promise to hold his hand and not let go.

he’s utterly fascinated by just how warm you are. cuddling up to you every night is nothing short of a dream for him, though sometimes he gets a little carried away. bloated fingers and calloused palms coming to rub at your plushy thighs as he dips his head lower, lower, lower… slimy tongue coming out to carefully swipe at your labia; lips pressing together to suck at your clit. he’d eat you out for hours if he were allowed to— your juices are like ambrosia to the undead between your legs. despite being a cannibalistic creature by nature, your flesh will be the best he’s ever tasted; and he shows that every time you let him make you cum on his tongue. he won’t complain if you’re menstruating, either… the more blood in his mouth the better. yummers!

sex with him is nothing but tender, too. hands pressed against your pretty, chubby tummy as he ruts his hips up into your own; cock brushing against that gummy spot inside your pretty pussy that has you seeing stars every. single. time. he makes sure to bring you to orgasm first and foremost, before dumping his load inside your womb with grunts and groans that are almost embarrassingly loud. he really can’t help himself. any chance to cum inside literally has him drunk off you, and considering he’s infertile… well, expect plenty of creampies… σ(^_^;)

you’re his pretty human, and he’ll make sure you feel the part, too.

[lordkryze]

As an Asian

this is the most relatable thing I've ever heard from a 2D character

[scrambledslut]

being delusional about middle aged men is my roman empire