#hm. also i might have adhd.

[lazaruspiss]

any horny hal jordan comics to recommend me?

GOD I WISH. unfortunately i am a "rotate my blorbo in the microwave of my minds eye" kind of guygal u know. Yes im a dc fan. No i dont read. We exist. (My reading list is a nightmare. It's an entire spreadsheet.) I wanna read hal's spectre arc bc it seems like its got weird gender and ghost stuff goin on which is soooo 💕💕💕

[torchickentacos]

ursa wip. drawing during powerpoints hour. feeling atla-y lately. annoyed at proportions but fuck it we ball, if I try to make it perfect I won't end up making it

[omghallucinations]

charts that made me go "oh boy": stray kids lee know

ok. well. i've been on a journey.

i was innocently inputting idols with known birth times into my astro software as i do and i put this guy in and said "oh... oh boy..." out loud so obviously i decided to do a write-up

i finished this write-up. realized i was bias wrecked all to hell. so. there u go. let this be a warning to you all. be careful whose chart you analyze because you could end up with a Problem!!

unrelated (related) i just love a sagittarius moon. my favorite moon there is. some people love a taurus moon, fair, valid (also lee know has his moon in the 2nd which is basically a layer of taurusy vibe) but i love a sagittarius moon most of all. those guys are crazy (affectionate). you cannot kill them in any way that matters. truly understand the inherent hilariousness of life... .. somehow can always see through the illusions of capitalism... i love them.

who is this anaretic degree ass

girl how many important degrees... do u need... ... i have two 29s and one 0 in my chart and i thought that was a lot...

lee know has both venus and neptune at 29 (and venus at 29.59 which is, wow old soul ready to get the hell off this lawn much?). the anaretic degree is the "fated degree"--it's like, your soul has just about mastered this energy and is about to take it somewhere else (bc the next degree is not 30, it's 0 of the next sign) so it's time for some TESTS. it's crises and gifts. often you're naturally good at this energy in whatever form that takes, but it's gonna fuck with you on and off throughout your life. more during the first half to be fair. especially with that 0 degree saturn, he'll probably be in way better shape after his saturn return.

venus at 29(.59?!?!) in libra -- ok i also have venus at 29 (.09!), so i can tell you that he never has to be single if he doesn't want to be, but it is not gonna go right for a long ass time and he's gonna be weird and intense about relationships and it will not feel good. he might think it is going right. he is wrong. get ready for some gifts but ALSO some crises with love and creativity and beauty and shit--especially with venus at home in libra and his scorpio rising. he's definitely captivating, and can probably bamboozle whoever he wants with his beauty and charm, but his crisis and urgency feeling in love is probably a Whole Lot both for him and for his partners. and it's in the 12th house like.. .. . oh boy honey. he's gonna hide his need for love and validation and his sensitivity so hard. also literally his relationships (and they'll probably be undefined for a long time) despite the fact that every one is gonna be so intense.

it's also opposite his 0 degree saturn????? girl!! and conjunct his sun also in the 12th... .. . . . well at least you are so beautiful and charming and generous, lee know, and everyone really likes you. i know u issues and tremendous sensitivity that you hide like crazy and probably a judgmental family member (who probably means well, unfortunately!) whose influence burdens u even now as u feel like there are somehow always Forces Working Against You for no reason! even tho u just gotta Believe In Yourself dot mp3.....

bright side! when he works through some of this stuff he's very likely gonna have a very solid and mature marriage and he already has sort of a maturity leg-up, thank u saturn in taurus and juno conjunct sun. eventually you will look back on the many unhinged texts you sent at 2am and laugh... . .. more than you already do, you sagittarius moon, you!!

neptune at 29 capricorn in the 3rd house -- hahahaha welcome to crises and gifts around dreams, illusions, secrets, delusions, etc. and make it capricorn: old soul vibes, anxiety, not gonna settle until later in life. in the 3rd house: dreams and illusions with gemini vibes, unending curiosity, brain running at 300 all day all night, so many Thoughts. hm. does he have adhd (inattentive subtype)???he's super creative and iconoclastic but he may be doing a lot of talking and not a lot of... doing. it's also a weird mood to have the fanciful dreams planet in the harsh reality sign, there's conflict inherent there. (oh lord, neptune is square venus and saturn with a 0 orb??? t-square??? bro??? lee know did ur parents or teachers or society crush ur dreams??? do you now crush your own dreams urself in advance to avoid disappointment??? do u think you can either have love or success and not both???)

(i can fix him!! wait.)

lunar nodes at 29 (NN in Leo in the 10th, SN in Aquarius in the 4th) -- lol this plus his 29.59 venus, his soul is Ready to Move On from these lessons hahaha, luckily his career really reflects his soul growth shit--moving away from his comfort zone of being a semi-reclusive iconoclastic weirdo with depressive tendencies who stays at home and moving towards self expression, celebration of himself and creativity in his career/a public space. he is gonna have a lot of crises about this though, since the south node is still really important and you shouldn't abandon it, it's ur foundation. he's gonna have questions like what does "be yourself" even mean??? how public is too public? how private is too private? what if i Fail, Publicly??? what if i don't put myself out there enough???

(he probably does not put himself out there enough, because of the relationship between his nodes, saturn, venus and his 12th house sun--but he should!! fight for your opportunities king!!)

(if u do not already have a therapist, lee know, please... get a therapist... it will help u.... i swear....)

we're still not done with degrees for some reason

saturn at 0 degrees taurus in the 6th house: another #same, my saturn is also at 0 degrees!! ateez jongho is another one with a 0 degree saturn, it's a very strong aura no matter what. any planet at 0 is fresh and new and EXCITED TO BE THERE and depending on aspects etc it will almost always express the energy of the planet in that sign real... loud... and real... vibrantly... ... .. without much nuance... for better or worse. this doesn't have to be a straightforward manifestation of the sign, sometimes it's wonky, but either way it's just a lot of Pure Sign and Planet Energy.

saturn is a more outer planet, so normally the sign its in is more of a light flavor and the much more important thing is the aspects and the house its in. if saturn is at 0, scratch that whole sentence

saturn in taurus is really. really clear in lee know's personality, tbh even to someone who only knows him from his professional activities. like. startlingly. i see her. saturn is a force for maturity, lessons, responsibility, discipline, structure, practicality, actual real physical life not the idea of life, and in taurus it's going. home. bye. the taurus jumps out. he's not too fussed about how much attention he's getting, or how much center time, he never jumps in ego-first. in the sixth house of work daily life and virgo vibes he's just gonna do what he's gotta do and get it done. solid, mature, grounded, no celebrity disease in sight, really a nice counterpoint to the kinda manic romance he's got going on in the 12th that would unhinge him from reality in many ways if it weren't for saturn

sixth house also gives some health stuff, some virgo vibes, can be critical. he might have or have had some health probs, or he may have them in future if he isn't super careful

taurus in the sixth to me gives apartment rooftop garden, beloved pets (6th house is the small animals house :)), dependable cornerstone at work but leaves at 5pm sharp because he wants to GO HOME. he's not gonna do more than he has to do because that's #stupid and he's not #stupid. he's not lazy at all he uses exactly the amount of energy he needs to and no more, again, because he's not dumb. vibes. icon. comfort. ease. chilling out.

he probably can really cut you deep if he wants to (especially with his chart ruler being his super specific and critical virgo mars in the 10th), luckily he doesn't care enough most of the time

(being mean in a funny way does not count, because of his aforementioned sagittarius moon and various gemini/virgo influences, it's the way he expresses affection!)

party (?) in his first house

idk i think a lot of idols have stuff in their first house, more proportionally than most people, which makes sense for their whole...situation. anyway. his first house has:

scorpio mercury: fun!! anything in your first house is gonna color the rest of your chart, almost like another layer to your rising. for example ateez hongjoong and (g)idle soyeon are both capricorn risings with uranus and neptune in the first house, so they're not regular capricorn risings, they're capricorn-aquarius-pisces risings. with mercury in there lee know gets a fun gemini/virgo flavor to his life path/vibe. he's gonna be chattier, funnier, externally wittier than most scorpio risings, more similar to a gemini or virgo rising in that way. it really is his cross of Sexy Intense Head Bitch You Shouldn't Cross but also Head Silly Yapper. his mercury is widely conjunct his ascendant, so the gemini/virgo/communication focus comes across strongly.

he's smart and curious and can talk anyone into anything at any time. it's another thing in his chart that chills out the sort of. self-serious Drama of scorpio placements (she said, scorpio moonly). mercury is zany!! and can really think itself into all sorts of interesting places (anxiety vortex? deluluville? why not both???)

scorpio chiron: well ya can't have it all. he has some pain and wounds around his own identity and place in the world as well as his soul-need for independence and self-assertion. it's complicated for him to Be Himself and with scorpio he probably has some past life shit here (in addition to his many heavily karmic 29 degree placements, let's all say thank you god for giving him a sagittarius moon and mercury in the 1st house)

sagittarius pluto: power. magnetism. take the usual power of a scorpio rising and crank it up to 20. also he has a temper under the calm, methodical taurus saturn and also thinks he's right 100% of the time. and he has some deep feelings and can empathize with the suffering of others! most importantly his past life stuff has been rooted in the search for identity and place in the world and he finds unconscious security in independence and his ability to assert himself, probably extra complicated for his 29 degree libra venus who craves union with another! lol!

this is honestly only just scratching the surface (just like any chart interpretation) but i gotta stop!! unfortunately i've been bias wrecked by an astrological chart. embarrassing as hell!!

[mistressoftheelderitchwhorehouse]

Affection = 1

A/N: Someone pointed out how Chuuya has had little to none positive affection that wasn't transactional, or didn't result in violence. So here's a drabble series about it.

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs

Pairing: Chuuya x Reader

___________________________

Chuuya didn't date.

He would fuck when he had the time, might even have the occasional friend with benefits if it was a slow month. All the sex he had was spit, and blood, and hastily discarded condoms. The girls typically didn't look at him twice after, and if they did it was to ask about his bank account.

Dazai had told him once that he wasn't made for relationships, that he would push away the first person that tried to allow him the space to be vulnerable.

Dazai ended up with a broken nose that day.

And yet Dazai's syrupy words clogged his ears and poisoned his heart as he watched you idly play with his ungloved fingers.

It wasn't deliberate like after sex. When your fingers squeezed his to keep your mind from floating away while you came down from your high. Nor was it the more annoying poking you did when you wanted him to get up to get the remote.

No, here it was soft, and almost lackadaisical. Starting between his thumb and pointer, you made looping patterns up along his knuckles, down the length of his middle finger, and back up to his knuckles.

You couldn't have needed anything. The movie playing was your choice, he had whipped you both up a quick meal, and he'd let you pick the wine this time despite knowing it would be something overly sweet.

He continued racking his brains for whatever needed fixing. You had things, you weren't initiating sex... Wait, did you need comfort?

His gaze shifted from your hands to your body. The movie wasn't emotionally taxing. Just a romance that had a happy ending, according to you. You also didn't appear injured. The dark skin peeking out from your night dress didn't display any marks he hadn't been previously aware of-

"Red, you good?"

He blinked and looked up at your face. Despite trying to focus, he could still feel your hand on his own, your movements halted.

"Yeah. 'm fine."

You raised an eyebrow. "We can switch the movie. I know you like ones with a bit more atmosphere."

You removed your hand from his, and he let out a soft breath, hand finally relaxing.

"Are we doing animated or live action?"

"Look. Sweetheart." You paused, hand on the remote. "Can we… Is it okay if we do a serious talk?"

And then Chuuya realized why he was willing to try the whole relationship thing. You set the remote aside after muting the TV, and turned to face him completely. "What’s up, Chuuya?"

He killed people for a living.

Watched them get their fingers broken after pulling off the nails. Setting buildings on fire with people still inside. Ripping people out of their beds while their families watched…

And yet facing you to ask such a basic question…

He scratched the back of his head, gaze pointedly fixed on his hands.

"I didn't get why you're messing with my hand."

"Hm?"

He clicked his tongue, but did his best to keep the anger out of his voice. "You were messing with my fingers, and…"

"You can just tell me to stop, Chuuya. I won't get upset."

"That's not it. I just don't get why." Frustration creeped into his tone, and yet you didn't even flinch. "I know my body runs warm, and I know I got rough hands. Can't see the reason for it if you don't want something."

You stared at him for a long moment, before you tilted your head to the side. "Does it make you uncomfortable?"

"No."

"Does it feel bad or annoying?"

"No."

Well, honesty time..."

He raised an eyebrow when you began twisting your own fingers. "I gotta do a lot of things at once. Blame the ADHD. And, you know, I like you so… I wanted to just show that."

He could pratically hear Dazai laughing at the confusion running through his head. He'd need to break that idiot's nose again...

You crawled closer to Chuuya, and grasped one of his hands in both of yours.

"It's like when you tuck me in. You don't have to. It's pratically auto pilot, right?" When he nodded you smiled. "but it shows you love me. This is how I wanna show you that I love you. I guess showing that I desire you for you. Ya know?"

He looked away sharply, his mouth twitching with a smile. He knew even with his shock of hair, you could see how red his face and neck were getting.

"I think I get it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He heard the couch shift, before he felt warm lips against his cheek. "Thank you for asking me about this. I'm very proud of you for handling this conversation so well."

"Yeah, yeah. We're adults. Gotta talk about shit when it happens."

"Exactly!"

He placed his hand on your lap, and you laced your fingers with his.

Fuck. What did he do to deserve you?

[concerningwolves]

since mum's informal ADHD diagnosis we've been talking a lot about all the different ways ADHD manifests, which has led to a fair few moments of "hm. we both do that don't we". and i truly do not know at this point if I'm auDHD or if this is just the overlap between autism and adhd that happens bc we share the executive dysfunction. so I mostly don't think about it, until I have days like yesterday, which went like this:

ugh my dog's head harness stinks i'm gonna soak it. well while that's soaking i'll go read some of the next textbook chapter. wait now i'm in my room i remember it smells bad in here. guess it's time for a deep clean. might also be a good idea to re-caulk around the windowsill, because now that I'm working in my room for the winter im sitting in front of the windowsill and seeing where the seal is all cracked and peeling everyday. and then I was like oh I need to move my bed. oh it's dusty down there. ok let's get out the big vacuum cleaner. wait hang on I was in the middle of polishing the dresser. actually while I'm here may as well empty the drawers and clean inside too (hey look found an odd sock I thought I'd lost better put that away). anyway back to the window. ugh i forgot to cut the seal and the tube gotta do back downstairs for the strong scissors. *walks past the cupboard with the candles in* oohhh maybe if i fill the top of the wax melter with lemon juice it'll be nice. gotta go back to chop a lemon. fuck me the fridge is a mess let's sort that out. right now i need to wash up . which I can't do because i forgot about the dog's harness in soak. so now i need to find somewhere to hang it to dry. ok back to the bedroom—

The only reason I didn't also dig out the paint cans and filler to fix the ugly holes in my wall is because when I started downstairs to get the supplies, I smacked straight into the doorframe and realised I was really really fucking tired. this is the kind of thing that happens to me if I don't carefully plan my days.

so yeah. adhd too or simply the result of no executive function to help me regulate the Doing of the Tasks ? who knows

[copperbadge]

Working through my asks this morning as a way of putting off chores I have to do, I got one that I think is in response to the Twelve Points sales post that made me go “hm...don’t think I’ll post that” but I think it might be smart to address it, so...

In Twelve Points, Buck doesn’t fall in love with Caleb because of his autism or in spite of it. He falls in love with Caleb, who is autistic, for the whole person that he is. Buck loves Caleb because he’s honest and funny and loves himself, because he gets Buck’s art, because they work well together. Caleb isn’t ashamed of his autism, and doesn’t even consider it as a reason Buck might not want a relationship with him. This was very deliberate on my part. 

Across the series, Jerry has an arc where he is diagnosed with ADHD as an adult -- a storyline I instituted before my own diagnosis -- and he does struggle with it. Seeing Caleb accept himself and also accept accommodation is very therapeutic for Jerry. And while most of the family has found his behavior frustrating at one time or another and it worries him a great deal, Alanna has also loved Jerry since long before his diagnosis, sometimes as a crush, always as a friend. Along with the rest of the family, she’s been working out accommodations unconsciously for years, like carrying his phone in her purse so he won’t lose it. Like Buck, Alanna loves a whole person, and Jerry’s family loves and accepts him as well. This was also deliberate. 

I have ADHD, which was diagnosed when I was 42, last year. I grew up with siblings who had childhood diagnoses of autism and dyslexia. Neither Caleb’s self-acceptance nor Jerry’s struggle with it are foreign to me. Even if I didn’t have personal experience of these things, it’s not impossible for a neurotypical person to understand disability and write about it with sensitivity. But I do.   

I also make the books available for free and I make no secret of that. If people are concerned about my portrayals of disability and want to read and decide for themselves, they can without paying a dime. It should perhaps be an initial step in a critical engagement with a book's author to read the book in question.

[wtftaylr]

23, 26, 34 for sadie?

HI MOOT!! <3 <3 Tysm for the ask!!!

#23 - How do they feel about physical touch/affection?

She's quite reserved, prefers her own personal space -- anything beyond a handshake or fist bump will only be coming from friends. They'll gladly accept hugs from friends but 99% of the time Sadie won't be the one to initiate them.

Before the events of New Vegas, Sadie spent many many years (age 15 through 34) as a courier and jury-rigging repairman con-artist, hyper-focused on saving up to one day fund their scientific research -- she didn't provide herself much time for establishing relationships (with humans at least, she's always taken to robots and is far quicker to befriend them).

All that to say, they're not accustomed to physical touch and it's a new experience having friends willing to initiate it -- like Veronica, for instance. I feel Veronica is a big hugger and while Sadie has no problem with it, it catches her off guard the first few (hundred) times.

And Benny -- holy shit. Sadie was not prepared for Just how much she's dotted on, touched, kissed, cuddled -- This could be its own post tbh but she does get used to reciprocating fairly quickly, but in smaller, less grand ways -- leaning into him, wrapping her arm around his, planting a kiss on his cheek before leaving -- her love language leans more towards Acts of Service. But now im rambling, im gonna put the brakes on haha

--

26. How would others describe them / their disposition?

First impressions are Sadie's unreactive, aloof, and short-tempered. Perhaps can lean towards off-putting with just how unreactive she is (I can go off, but it's partially due to Flat Affect from autism, and subsequently made more apparent after head trauma. If you're interested in more info, I go into an absurd amount of head trauma detail on her profile. Warning for mobile users, that particular section doesn't turn into a scroll box on mobile yet. Gotta figure out that coding lol [i know nothing about coding so uhh wish me luck lol]).

Though as she's allowed to warm up, they're genuine and kind towards friends; she's ride or die for life. Always willing to help at the first opportunity -- with anything. To the point where it could be perceived as annoying to some folks lmao /lh

[Lucky 38 Presidential Suite] Boone: hm. I'm thirst- Sadie, materializing out of thin air: WOULD U LIKE A DRINK. PERHAPS A NUKA-COLA. SOME WATER. SUNSET SASPARILLA MAYBE BUT DON'T DRINK TOO MUCH OF IT I HEARD IT'S A HEALTH HAZARD. IF U WANT SOMETHING SPECIFIC THAT WE DON'T HAVE I CAN GO BUY IT FOR YOU-- Boone: Boone: water is fine

Also!! I'm working on the Relationship section of Sadie's profile; this might provide a bit of extra insight on specific characters and their dynamic okay you got me, I just wanted to show this off I love how it's turning out so far and it seemed related tho idk if that's the adhd talking or if im being fr

--

34. What armor / clothing do they typically wear?

OOOHHHH I desperately wanna do a new outfit lineup for her. But I wanna answer this ask while it's still 2024 so (mostly) text-only for now >B)

She most often wears Daniel's Outfit (that guy sucked but, credit where credit's due, that outfit is fuckin fire) -- I drew her in it [here] but Really wanna draw her in it properly. Daniel who? This is Sadie's Outfit.

As for armor, the Stealth Suit MK II (OWB) is her go-to for more dangerous fights.

[bitemegamer]

Log 01: A Note and Meeting Qiu and Tamarack (Long Post)

Something about this intro... It makes my heart ache in the best way possible. It's the start, the start to a new section of a new life. It is the Fall, the air is cooling down and I can feel it hitting my nose.

*Forgive me, I shall be using MC thoughts as that of my own and basing things off of how I would react, I shall be using first person writing

I decided, since my MC is 10 and I was a little bit of a nut at this time, I would have him believe that it was a ghost that poked him instead of him being rational about it.

He gets greeted with this paper, and... Honestly, how WOULD your little kid thoughts (esp that of someone who did believe in ghosts) think this meant?

*I blurred the last name for my own reasons, thank you very much*

I really, truly wished to be Nancy Drew or one of the Hardy Boys. I spend so much time watching mysteries with my mom. Probably way too much time.

Too bad I am going to break those rules, Mother! Muahahaha! I am a little troublemaker. Just kidding. However, it's okay. I have a way to bend the rules... Just a little bit ;)

*Proceeds to go to the woods, which to me feels like straying even further??? tbh, knowing myself as a kid, I would have done this without thinking too deeply*

Oh where shall I be going? On a cool quest! Off I go to the amazing and great unknown!

WHAT??? Man... :( I know for a fact I would have been so upset, yet a little relieved. Had I gone further into the forest, I might have freaked out just a little bit.

The ghost inhabits this building.

Also, random thought/feeling/vibe that I am feeling... This reminds me so much of when I was a little kid doing my own thing, just wandering about and feeling like the whole world was amazing and whimsical. As a kid, I would always go out of my way to have some sort of fun and adventure... Even if that meant getting lost or making something out of nothing.

A RACCOON!

If I end up dying, let it be known that I met the end of my life with the coolest animal ever.

I'm sure said kid feels very different about a total stranger being in their backyard climbing up their fort.

lol, he thinks I'm quirky...

I mean... You were the one who sent the note... Right? Right? Oh God, never mind--

Don't look at me like that *SOB SOB* I'm trembling over here as if I am some sort of scared little grey hound!

Nice to meet you as well, Qiu!

*Snorts*

OCD Autism meeting and seeing someone with ADHD for the first time be like (joking):

I decided to be a little more nicer to him and politely just point it out to him:

This honestly does beg the question for me... How often has Qiu lost something simply from people just not telling him that he dropped his pages.

That's it, Bud. You. Me. We're going to be in it together. You're never going to lose something like that again while I'm around you.

He'll listen to me, but he will have no idea what I am talking about. At least he tries.

Making art out of trash... I see.

Yeah... Maybe my joke about ADHD might not be as much of a joke as I thought it was.. Hm...

Oh... OH... She's so cute, she makes me wanna cry..

Tamarack really went: 'Wow, okay, *bye*.

Well... Since I have exceeded my image limit for this post, I do believe that I can have this a closing moment... As of now, my MC has met both of the wonderful romantic/friend interests and I think they're both so wonderful!

I know that I am currently playing the Demo at the moment, but goodness this is so cute. This reminds me so much of my days after school and spending time with my friends around this time period.

I can't wait to finish this intro out and write more about my silly little thoughts... Until then, I hope you guys have enjoyed my little comments. I love doing that when I play games.

[putrid-sex-machine]

ALL ANGELS ARE TRANSGENDER

no real dni as i think theyre fucking stupid. i'm pro para, pro fic, pro wtvr tf, just not pro contact. dont follow if you think my blog might upset you. close minded ppl & fake claimers fuck off. basic boundaries: i don’t fw srs sexualization of rape (not cnc), anything relating to animals or children (pet and age play don’t count) & detrans posting by cis ppl. pls don’t take anything i rbg or post on this account as any form of approval or support for genuinely harmful kinks. i talk about unsafe ideas that are fine to fantasize about but would be unsafe irl. know the difference & take good care of yourselves & sexual partners<3

THIS iS A SiDE BLOG. i CANNOT FOLLOW BACK OR LiKE POSTS.

[iNBOX & DMS R OPEN!!!] -> wont be answering weird dms w no context lol. at least try to use basic conversation skills.

☆ as far as you should be concerned, i don't have a name. call me null. he/it/hymn, subby, pre-everything (for now) ftm, 18, edgy loser. i'm an anti censorship, splatterpunk enthusiast. literally a star in a human flesh suit. werewolf loving, monster fucking, petplay and forcemasc obsessed freak. i practice the occult, tulpamancy, (maybe) satanism and whatever other shit i find interesting.

☆ my gender and sexuality are beyond my and your comprehension. idk wtf is going on & neither should you. trans man/masc whos somewhere near the definition of omnisexual. masculine & androgynous pref & don’t typically find mainstream presentation of cis women attractive. transmasc, non binary, but also a man who still likes women in a gay way. i'm ambiamory.

☆ mysterious undiagnosed issues ;-)c (possibly grandiosity, hypomania & adhd but idfc). i'm prone to borderline delusional thinking & often see myself as divine and angelic, i might come off as ungrounded and overly intense when experiencing this. this is not a thought pattern that can or will be changed by strangers online. any attempts at “reality checking” will be ignored.

☆ i have weird thoughts & am a fucking loser for petplay. i love gross media. freaks PLEASE interact. asks always open (^_^) if you're following me & i actively interact with your posts pretend we're mutuals

PROFiLE NAViGATiON

#.txt -> text post (obv)

#.img -> img post (again, duh)

#favs -> lets take an educated guess!

#my writing -> hm...

#my art -> tag i use in the rare occurrence i post my art here

#pics -> not my pictures/rbg imgs i fw

#resources -> information & other helpful links

#scotties crap -> my tulpas rbgs/posts/wtvr tf

#puppy posting -> horny shit <3

#god.pdf -> idk how to describe this one. just click it ig

✓ (heavy) praise, mild/light degradation, body worship & inspection, forcemasc, humiliation, teratophilia/monster fucking, petplay, primal, roleplay, cowboys, werewolves, manhandling, boots, masks, grinding, double penetration, 3some, biting, vanilla, pet names, corruption, voice, monster plants

? intox, (safe/light) bloodplay, overstim, urophilia???? (not too sure on this 1, its mainly the power imbalance and desperation it represents), dumbification, scarification, bdsm, cnc (with proper aftercare), scent/musk, bondage

✗ detrans, scat, feet, misgendering, feedism, raceplay, emetophilia, ageplay, lack of aftercare

KiNKTOBER 2024 SOFT SMUT PROMPTS HORROR MOViE NSFT ASKS

[ceilingfan5]

🏅and 💭 for the fic asks please!

🏅 What is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc). i'm taking a little break bc work has been crazy but!! my current fic is at 63,197 words atm! im really excited to push thru and get it finished

ironically i planned it so VERY LITTTLE this time. which might be why i am hesitating lol

💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work? oh hm........ sticker stars krav's music is very hozier-like. taako and kravitz come together in every universe like magnets and they adore each other and drive each other nuts. taako has to invite you into the kitchen and if you are not invited you are a fucking enemy even if he loves you. in revenge plus one's au after the cruise taako and krav go on a bunch of dates and taako helps krav push for a promotion and once they move in together taako takes a break from working three jobs to start focusing on what it would look like to open his own restaurant. taako and krav are both mad audhd but taako's adhd is louder and kravs autism is louder and taako was the kind of kid who got it picked up way fast (bc he was a menace <3) and krav doesn't figure it out until he's like. 30. and someone has to spell it out for him.

also in sticker stars i do think krav starts to spoil taako and spend money on him and if it's silly taako will be like ah yes. as i deserve. but if it's smth he really wants it makes him freak and he has to be gently lowered into the affection zone like petting a stray cat

i cant think of any more off the top of my head, i'd need to be asked about a specific fic/au/scenario haha. i tend to live in the fics when i write them and just assume ive communicated it all but the worlds are sooo much richer in my head i hope yall know

[desceros]

Hm ok the next question I have, is do you have any head canons for Bayverse, rise, or idw? Anything that’s maybe not “canon” but you always have it in your head for them when you’re creating?

oh yeah totally. here's a few:

rise

leo has gnarly adhd (combination, but very heavy on the inattentive type). his brain is always running at a million miles per hour. it manifests with an anxiety issue, but he wants to seem "cool" so he tries to couch his concerns as much as possible

the boys have a family-only lou jitsu night where once a month, everyone gets together and watches a whole bunch of splinter's old movies. when he tries to talk in the middle of them, they tape him to the chair

we all know i love giving all of them (and donnie in particular) ptsd post-krang

casey wouldn't live in the lair. i think they'd have him live with april so he could get some socialization. but he does have his own room in the lair, and he has to come back every once in a while just to decompress when the whole Society thing gets to be too much

leo and donnie are a lot closer than either of them like to admit. the whole twin thing started out as a joke when they were kids, but as they get older, they really do gravitate towards each other. matching clothes. just hanging out together. little concept of personal space. they still fight a lot but they make up just as easily.

bayverse

donnie likes to garden and gets tips from splinter about how to do it well

leo loves tea. the ritualization of it, having a moment with his father to decompress, the subtle flavors... he loves all of it

mikey is the one with adhd in this version. his manifests much more physically than leo's, making him bounce around. also i think he doesn't have a great grasp on risk analysis, so he'd do stupid shit with his friends if they asked him to.

raph has a sweet tooth and really loves baked goods

idw

donnie's autistic and often forgets to eat when he's focused on working. mikey brings him something to eat from time to time, and even though it's actually awful, donnie eats it every time bc he appreciates the gesture

leo talks to his swords while he's taking care of them. calls them by their names. tells them that they did a good job during training. raph overheard him once, and he thinks it's super lame, but he doesn't have the heart to tease leo about it

i think casey might have had a little bit of a crush on raph, just a little. before he starts getting interested in april. nothing serious, nothing that ever goes anywhere. he just rationalizes it as gratitude for what raph did, and goes on as if it never happened.

[jamesunderwater]

20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ

Thanks for tagging me!! @gracelesslady23 @annabtg @kay-elle-cee this was very sweet to get to do.

Ao3 Username: itsjamespotter

1. How many works do you have on A03?

31, wow! How wild, that feels like a lot.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

162k!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

HP

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Show and Tell (3k, wolfstar smut)

Dead To Me (91k, wip lily evans angst)

Tall Dark and Glasses (3k, jily fluff)

"you have no idea how long i've been wanting to do that" (1k, prongsfoot smut)

Bring Your Kid to Work Day(s never end when your godfather is Sirius Black) (2k, good godfather sirius black fluff)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to, or at least have the goal to, but admittedly I'm very bad at it. (not to use it as an excuse but my adhd is fully to blame.) I plan to go back and catch up on all of them soon & have a dream of being much better about it, though. I do intentionally make sure I eventually respond to the ones for my WIPs, at least.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

well, since dead to me hasn't ended yet (kidding kidding kidding kidding!!!) lmao I really thought I was gonna have a hard time finding a fic with an unhappy ending but I evidently forgot who I am. I dunno how to choose between: 1. i don't even know where you end and i begin (500 words, canon prongsfoot....you get it) 2. Promises to Keep (1k words, dorlene with canon ending....you get it)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Okay listen, do I technically have a fic that mentions living happily ever after in the last line? Yes. Am I choosing that fic? No. I'm choosing Happy Holidays, You Filthy Potters, because 1. smut, 2. sassy young Harry, and best of all, 3. sassy good godfather sirius black 😉

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've gotten a couple of comments about Lily in Dead To Me but I've decided it's not my problem if people don't have critical analysis skills 💀

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! I write smut for a number of different ships and plan on doing others! Uhhh, what kind? the fact that I don't really know what that means probably means it's pretty vanilla 😆 there's a lot of going down on people 🤐

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Haha, no, but if I did I'd probably do PJO/HP

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge. that would be so heartbreaking.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but that's SO cool that people offer to do that for some fics!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have!! @charmsandtealeaves and I co-wrote a fic for a jilychallenge last year, before we were even friends! It was my first time co-writing a fic, which was very cool and different, but also didn't feel that foreign to me -- I think because I've spent a lot more years doing para RP than I have writing fics. It was fun to kind of riff off another writer in a different way. I would definitely do it again!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Okay, this is kind of tough because I only recently got into Prongsfoot, and they are the definition of soulmates... But because I ultimately see Sirius as more of an ace/aro character, Jily wins the place of favorite ship in my heart. <3

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Well, I really only have two WIPs posted on AO3: Dead To Me and Just This Once, and I have all of DTM outlined and plan to finish it by fall. Just This Once might be a while, but I also have a plan for it and would like to finish it at some point... But I guess there's a chance I won't finish it -- I do have a lot of other multi-chaps I am going to be starting soon.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Hm. I like to think I'm good at getting into the minds of my characters, really thinking through their motivations and emotions and then expressing those to the reader. I also think I'm fairly good at dialogue. I really like writing banter so I hope others think I'm good at it, haha. And based on what I've been told, my smut isn't half bad 😆

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Oh, definitely writing descriptions of any kind. I never remember to describe the scene and when I do, I think it feels clunky. I'm not great at writing in a more direct way, either; I struggle to express a character's emotions without getting a bit flowery with it. Just generally, I think my writing could be tighter, you know? I'm sure I'll realize other things I need to work on as I write more long fics, too.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Ah, haven't done it yet, so don't have any thoughts to share.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

HP -- Jily on the Neopets forums... never 4get <3

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

If we're talking finished works, I'd have to say Tall Dark and Glasses, which I wrote for the masquerade event for Jilytober last year. To me, that fic has a certain je ne sais quois that is hard to replicate. But unfinished? Dead To Me, hands down, and once it's finished it will be very hard to ever top it. It's imperfect and there are a lot of edits I'd make if I were to go back through and polish it up, but it's the first multi chap fic I've ever written, and beyond just feeling immensely proud of that, the story itself and how I'm writing it is one of the most heartfelt and meaningful things I'll ever write in my life.

these were such a pleasure to respond to, thanks again for the tags! <3 I'm tagging: @goldenbi @abihastastybeans & @nodirectionhome-ao3

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

Why does many believes luna has adhd/autism?

I believe it starts with her having a lot of traits commonly associated with them, and then people just have noticed more and more stuff as they watch.

Here's stuff I personally have noticed:

Of course, her being hyper. Might be a little stereotypical to say she has adhd just because of this alone, of course, but it's a trait.

Her often being distracted and quickly shifting focus. An example of this is when she's about to examine the drawing under her bed, but right then her phone rings. What I personally would have done is first grab the drawing and then answer the phone. But Luna's thought process is "hm, what's this drawing- PHONE RINGS!!! MUST ANSWER PHONE!!" and then she answers her phone and forgets all about the drawing. There is also other moments where she's about to focus on something and the quickly, something else gets her attention and she forgets all about what she originally was gonna do

(A little sad thing I think, is that sometimes Luna jokes about how "distracted" she is even when she isn't. She's so used to probably having grown up hearing people laugh about her being distracted so now that's kind of how she sees herself :( )

Her hyperfixation for roller skates. It's not just an obsession the way she loves those shoes with wheels. She can (and has) fallen asleep with them on. She also NEVER seems to get tired when she wants to skate, even when everyone else seems to get tired.

When she's gotten something in her head, she's focusing all her energy on that. She lets other stuff like schoolwork and sometimes sleep get left behind because she only wants to focus on the thing she's interested in.

Now, this is just a small list at the moment, but watching the show there's a lot of little moments that could be shown as examples to support this headcanon.

[severeannoyance]

Hi!

So I’ve stumbled upon fanart of your tfa fic “The Brave Shall Heed the Call” and it seems intriguing.

But…onscreen sex is a pretty big nope for me and the Explicit rating has me nervous. I can totally deal with a fic being Dark and dealing with rape and stuff. But my tolerance for the onscreen stuff is a fade to black or heavy implication sexy times were just had (be that a good or bad thing for the character).

Are the sex scenes themselves pretty easily skipable? Or am I better off just passing on the fic?

Ok first order of business, what is this fanart and where can I find it? I'm in the depths of wedding prep and my ego needs stroking. If I have to think further about how we're arranging the seating so the two local authors who hate each other do not start a physical fight, I will start biting people like an upset cat.

Secondly--uh. Hm. That's a very good question. I wrote that more than ten years and a pandemic ago, and I've written a lot since. There's definitely onscreen sex with bits described. Also, the scenes I recall are kind of loadbearing, in terms of plot and character development and people grappling with complex feelings about intimacy and trauma, and I've no idea how easily skippable they are. In a lot of my fics, the sex is important to the plot--no judgement on pwp fics, I'm just aspec and adhd and sex without plot and character development is boring to write, for the same reason fight scenes without emotional interplay are boring to watch. For that reason, the smut in there is largely about a character reclaiming his bodily autonomy and his happiness and confidence in intimacy.

I CAN say that it's a fairly low percentage of sex by volume. I genuinely don't remember how late in the fic the smut gets started, but it's like 100k and most of it is violent revolution, not nookie.

If any onscreen sex is profoundly distasteful to you, you might want to give this one a miss. Basically, do what you're comfortable with; you'll be a better judge of that than anyone else.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Hello, I have a question, it's ok to post this publicly. Idk if I have an ED or not, but I do have a lack of appetite and a frequentar aversion to eating most foods. I have been talking to my psychologist about it and maybe it's linked to my adhd or trauma but it hasn't started since last year (or maybe in the pandemic but idk) and I am in my thirties. I have been doing my best to nourish myself either way (vegan protein powder is my bff) but still I miss having like a normal appetite. Has anyone experienced something similar? Ty in advance 🙂‍↕️✨

Hm, that's really tough. I wonder if you might start with the food aversion thing. If food aversion hasn't been an issue all your life, then maybe you could check in with what feelings come up for you (physical or emotional) when you are eating (or thinking about eating) those specific foods. It's totally possible that there's some trauma going on there. Additionally you could note if any of the foods you're averse to have anything in common, whether they are part of the same food group or they are perhaps all linked to a certain time in your life or feeling. Or you could kind of get in touch with the specifics of the aversion. Like is it a texture thing? Did someone or something make you feel guilty or scared of eating certain kinds of foods? Etc.

Lack of appetite can be linked to changes in mental health, but also in physical health. If this has not been something you experienced Have you noticed any other physical issues in that timeframe? Have there been any other lifestyle changes that have occurred recently?

Something you could potentially try, if you are really averse to specific foods, is to try exploring new foods if you feel up to it. It's okay if you don't end up liking these things - it's more about exploring a new relationship with new foods that are associated with positive things rather than trying to force yourself to go back to foods that aren't doing it for you right now. Take time to really eat them slowly and notice what you like or don't like about them, without ascribing any specific morality to liking or not liking specific foods.

If you find yourself nauseous or struggling to keep the food down, it might be worthwhile to check in with yourself regarding your physical or emotional reactions, to determine whether this is a physical health problem or more of an emotional one to work on.

Great job utilizing supplements to take care of your body as best you can while you work this out!

[commsroom]

this is kind of a confusing question and I’m not sure how to phrase it so sorry about that lol, but do you ever think about how eiffel’s inabiliity to focus on difficult or unpleasant or boring tasks might impact his relationships with others? since that as a character trait is mostly shown wrt how it impacts his work on the station

yes, for sure! hm. how to phrase this. i think those things overlap, because the hephaestus is kind of a closed environment. like minkowski tells him: when you're in a place like that, you pick your battles. eiffel not cleaning up after himself, etc. might be annoying, but it's lower on the list of priorities than, um. managing the space station so everyone doesn't die. and he can't entirely flake because, well. he's stuck there. eiffel definitely... well, he has unmanaged adhd. he's forgetful, he's impulsive, the idea of doing something now to make it easier on his future self is pretty much incomprehensible to him - and i think that's frustrating for him, when it's something he actually cares about. he doesn't like letting people down, he just thinks it'll hurt less for everyone (including himself) if they expect it.

eiffel so easily falls into that cycle of, like. he does something that bothers someone -> they try to talk to him about it -> it doesn't sink in -> this happens a couple of times, and they decide it's not worth fighting about -> he keeps doing whatever annoying / hurtful / etc. thing because he "didn't think you minded."

canonically, the interpersonal part is explored more through... emotional transgressions, rather than his unwillingness to do physical tasks, but i think the root cause is the same: "i'm just trying to help!" / "are you? are you really? or are you just trying to not be bored for half a second? to distract yourself from how much you can't stand yourself?" even just within shut up and listen... eiffel insists on using the name he wants for their project, even if hera prefers a different one. i think you can extrapolate a lot from that.

and eiffel has lived a pretty lonely life - he doesn't expect people to stick around, but because of that, he's never really had to account for how other people would fit into his life, how he might have to inconvenience himself sometimes for the people he loves. on his own, if eiffel forgot to go grocery shopping, or didn't do his laundry, neglected household maintenance, etc. then he was the only one who really had to deal with the consequences of that. it wasn't an indication to others about whether he valued their time and/or comfort. like, back to his radio show with hera - if she wanted to do something he thought was boring, would he be able to suck it up and enjoy that she was enjoying it, or would he just whine about not getting to do his thing? that mindset has definitely been a problem for him in previous friendships and romantic relationships.

to put all of that a little more succinctly: i think eiffel cares a lot, and he wants to show that he cares, but he can be kind of self-centered. i think eiffel is a surprisingly good gift giver, and makes a big deal out of other people's birthdays, for example - but that's because his birthday is important to him; i think it might be harder for him to wrap his head around when it's something he wouldn't care about, but it's important to someone else. i also think it's much easier for him to make an active effort where it's being recognized that he's showing care, rather than sustained, daily, monotonous tasks that largely go unremarked on. you know? i think he can get better at it, and i think caring for other people might help him take better care of himself, too, but i don't think it's ever going to be easy for him.