#his cover of the great pretender and the music video always fucking get me

[wandercr]

it's crying about freddie mer.cury hours

[joels-shitty-puns]

The Key To Your Heart - Track 9

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Musician!Reader

Series Summary: After writing your feelings for Pedro into a song, it gains a lot more popularity than expected. Ultimately it brings both criticism and support, with new possibilities around the corner.

Series Warnings: 18+ only (MDNI). Panic/Anxiety attack. Alluding to sexual scenarios. Kissing. Fat shaming, name calling. Mentions of food, weight loss, weight gain, dieting, weighing, potential eating disorder, food guilt. Potential for puns/dad jokes (name of my blog, and the fic) should give that away. This is my first fic which should be its own warning, lol. Also some cursing. Mentions of masturbation (f) maybe more smut later idk. Sadness, reader is pretty depressed. Poor body image. Rude people. Bullying-ish and just lack of support? Anxiety. Age gap! Reader is in her mid 20's, Pedro is current age (48).

Other stuff: Reader is plus sized. AFAB. Inexperienced. Also has a dog, but you can pretend it is another creature probably. Further, in case it isn't clear, italics almost always are the reader's inner thoughts!

Word Count: 2.7K

Series List: Here!

Miss Chapter 8? Here!

Hi everyone!! I really don't feel great about this chapter, I'm sorry if it sucks. I kinda just want to get it out there though because I don't see my brain thinking up anything better. A lot of writer's block surrounding this scene. Anywho, hopefully next chapter will be better, but I still hope you like it. Although we allude to a little bit of sexual situations now that they are together, I likely will avoid explicit smut being that Pedro is a real human and I am a guilty, guilty human for writing any smut at all. I don't want to offend Pedro (not that he'd ever see it anyway, I am delusional), but I also know people find real person fiction uncomfy as a whole. That being said, I think this story may be coming to a close pretty soon. I plan to have maybe one more full storyline chapter, and at least one little side bonus chapter :) Please let me know what you think in the comments, or DM me if you wanna chat! I love hearing all your thoughts. Thank you for reading and hanging in here with me.

Before the screen even had a chance to load, you canceled the request. Nervously looking at Pedro, he held your hand under the table. “What is it?” he asked gently.

“I just realized,” you replied. “What if they ask about us? About those pictures? What should I say?”

Pedro answered with a gentle stroke of his thumb on your cheek. “Whatever you feel comfortable with. I'm sure I'll be fine with whatever you say, baby. I know your privacy is important to you, and I trust you. I'm all in with you.”

“Okay.” You took a deep breath and once again began the stream.

“Live in 3���”

“2…”

“1…”

The fans began to file in, and before you knew it, you had thousands of viewers. Opting to start with your screen covered, you wanted to give an intro first before the big reveal. 

It wasn't long before the comments flowed across the screen. 

You took a deep breath, squeezing Pedro’s hand, and jumping in. “Hi everyone! It's me… a lot has been happening lately and I decided it might be time to show a little more of myself.”

-“First!”

-“Did she mean to start a live video ??"

-"Hiii! I'm a big fan"

-“Is she there??”

-“Do you guys see anything?”

“So… Here's me.” You turned on your camera, waving at the screen, your stomach twisting in deeper knots.

-“No fucking way.”

-“!?!!!!!”

-“SCREAMING”

“Hi… Some of you might know me, some might be surprised. But this is me. This is the girl behind the music.”

The comments flooded in, entirely too fast for you to read.

“I want to thank all of you for being fans and listening to my songs. It really means a lot and I hope you liked the album. Your support blows me away, especially with what little information about myself I've given.”

More comments.

“Well, I uh… guess I should read some of these comments and answer some questions. I'm sure there’s a lot you all are wondering about,” you stated nervously, starting to read.

-“Why did you hide your identity?”

“Why did I hide my identity… I hid my identity mostly based on poor self image. I never expected my music to gain popularity, never expected celebrities to know it. Never expected any of it, and it certainly brought its share of criticism. I was scared to be in the spotlight and I didn't feel like I looked good enough to be someone famous. You know? I'm not skinny, I have flaws, and that doesn't always sit well with the Internet. I guess I was mainly scared of how I would be perceived. I'm just a normal girl who had her whole life flipped upside down when I wrote my feelings down,” you laughed anxiously.

Choosing to ignore the storm brewing in the comments below, you addressed the earlier comment. “Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad I can make you feel more accepted by seeing more plus-sized people in the entertainment business. Everyone should feel seen and have a place at the table, no matter what you look like, or who you are.”

-“I think it's nice to have more celebrities that look kinda like me.”

-“You're so humble!!”

-“You should've stayed hidden lmao”

-“Shut up, asshole. Why are you here if you're going to be rude?”

-“I'm sure you're a real supermodel behind that keyboard bravery.. smh”

You weren't expecting someone to actually feel like you were representing them and making them feel seen. You didn't think you had enough of an impact for that. You certainly weren't treated that way when you weren't famous. Nobody really even noticed you before.

You could feel Pedro’s eyes on your face, his thumb swirling circles and hearts over the space of skin on the top of your hand, below your thumb. The place where his bullseye resides on his own. Does he trace that tattoo when he's nervous, the same way he is with me? Perhaps his tracing of your hand is calming himself as much as it is for you.

Desperately, you wanted to look over at him and be comforted by his deep brown eyes, but doing so would cause people to wonder who you made eye contact with and smiled at. So instead, you gave a gentle squeeze and a smile towards the screen, hoping he would understand. 

-“Hi, I'm a big fan of yours. Can I ask… is what you said on your album true? You've never been kissed before? I haven't either and I was starting to feel like I'm just a freak.”

“Oh, honey, you aren't a freak. Everyone has things happen at different times in their life. But yes, everything I wrote in my album at the time I wrote it was true. And don't worry, I have felt the same way. Seeing others be kissed, falling in love… having the things I wasn't, it really hurts. But it'll be okay.. nothing is wrong with you. You're deserving of love.”

You hoped they wouldn't pick up on your usage of past-tense wording. Pedro, still holding your hand, rubbed his other hand over your arm gently.

-“Wait… at the time you wrote it? What about now?”

The comments were going wild.

Welp…

Your hands shook, and you used your opposite hand to place on top of Pedro’s that gripped yours. He squeezed gently, feeling the nervous tremors pass through your body, continuing to rub gentle strokes over your arm with his opposite hand.

“Uhm…” your cheeks heated and your stomach sank.

“I've changed a lot since this album was first written. Experienced new things. But I'm still the same person.”

Shit.

-“Who did you kiss?! Is it the guy in your song?”

-“Will you tell us who the song is about?”

-“Wait a second… you're that girl aren't you!?!!!! The one in the pictures with Pedro Pascal!!!!”

-“OMG IT IS”

-“!!!!!!!”

-“IS HE THE GUY!?!”

-“ARE YOU DATING!?!”

The nervous tremors continued, now threatening to cause your teeth to chatter. A full panic attack was brewing. Pedro squeezed your hand again, touching your knee and trying to do his best to ground you without speaking up on your live video. Skipper could feel the waves of anxiousness pooling off of you as well and crawled forward to settle his body across your feet. You took a few calming breaths, but when you went to speak, your voice still betrayed you.

“I..” your voice cracked, shakiness evident as you could feel tears starting to edge their way towards your vision.

I can't do this. I can't do this. I need to shut it off.

You shut your eyes, taking deep breaths, trying to ease your nausea and stress. 

Keeping your eyes closed, you spoke. “Yes.”

You took another deep breath. “Yes it was me, yes the song was about him. Yes.”

You opened your eyes to read the comments, tears pooling down your cheeks as you couldn't hold back your emotion anymore.

This is so embarrassing. The first time I show my face I'm crying and having an anxiety attack in front of the whole world.

You swallowed, choking back the full sobs that your body wanted to let loose. Wiping your face with the back of your hand, you began to read the comments, expecting laughter, criticism, and bullying. Instead, you were met with kindness.

Coming back to your senses, you gave a shaky smile. “Thank you guys. I'm sorry for my emotions.” You sniffled. Pedro was still rubbing your hands and arms, comforting you, having never stopped. His eyes still bore into the side of your head, and you knew he was struggling to not speak up or grab you fully. 

-“Oh my God, are you okay?”

-“I didn't mean to make you cry I'm so sorry”

-“You and Pedro make a cute couple”

-“Oh no, please don't cry”

-“Idk if you guys are dating but you seem cute”

-“I'm so glad you guys are spending time together when he's the guy in your song”

-“It'll be okay, please don't be upset”

-“You're amazing, we love you”

“Yes, Pedro and I have been spending a lot of time talking after he publicly commented on my song a few months ago. The party was the first time we met in person and we're still figuring things out,” you let go of your worries and broke eye contact with the camera, looking to your side to meet Pedro’s gaze. “But… we're happy.” You smiled at him. He smiled back gently, squeezing your hand, worry and sadness plaguing his face over your well-being. Breaking eye contact, you looked back at the screen.

You giggled before answering “well, I think that's all we have time for today. Thank you all for joining me!” You silently clicked off the stream, closing the browser, turning off the computer, and turning to Pedro. He grabbed your other hand in his, now holding both. “Are you okay?” He asked, concern etched in his face.

-“AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!”

-“IS HE THERE WITH YOU!?!”

-“whaaaaat”

-“SCREAMING”

-“Shut. Up. This is insane.”

-“YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE I CAN'T TAKE IT”

“I think so,” you nodded.

“Seeing you panic and not being able to do anything without potentially making it worse… It killed me. I'm so sorry. I just wanted to pull you into my arms and end that video myself. I hated seeing you so upset.” He stared down at your intertwined hands, rubbing his thumb over them again. 

“I appreciate you being here for me,” you let go of his hand to stroke his cheek. “I couldn't have done that without you.” You met his eyes, leaning forward to rest against his forehead. He let out a shaky breath. “I love you. I'm so proud of you.”

“I love you too,” you replied with a smile. “Let's move to the couch, huh?” You asked, pulling him up from the chair. He stood, just as your phone rang, a call from Rose. You quickly answered.

“I saw the live stream. You did wonderful! Don't worry about any of the negative comments you saw or any stories that come out of this. I'll handle it all.”

“Thanks, Rose.”

“Anytime. Take care.” She hung up.

You updated Pedro as the two of you walked towards the couch. “Do you want breakfast?” He asked.

“Maybe in a minute. Can I just hold onto you for a few minutes?”

“I would love nothing more.”

He sat on the couch, you sitting next to him, before he gave you a look. “What?” you laughed. He patted his leg.

“Let me hold you.”

“I'm too heavy for that Pedro, don't be ridiculous,” you shook your head.

“You're the one being ridiculous.” He reached over, pulling you into his lap. “I'm too heavy! You're going to hurt yourself,” you whined.

“You're not too heavy. You're the perfect size, baby. Come here,” he pulled you forward, your body sliding down his thighs as he wrapped his arms around you. You straddled his lap, knees on either side of his hips while he rubbed your back gently. You placed your arms around him, nuzzling into his neck and closing your eyes. You both sighed, and he grabbed a blanket next to him to pull over your bodies. “I could stay like this for hours, wrapped in your arms” you sighed comfortably. 

“Why don't you?” He turned his head to kiss your lips. You lifted your face up, taking your head off his shoulder to kiss him deeper. The kisses were lazy and comfortable, holding each other and enjoying the warmth of being in each other's arms.

Finally the two of you broke the kiss, settling back on his shoulder, him tilting his head to lean against yours. His hands sprawled over your back, pulling you forward a bit to adjust in his lap. You let out a soft whimper at the contact, fully aware of the location your bodies connected at the moment. “Feel how much you mean to me?” He asked, his breath ghosting your ear as he pulled your hips forward again. You whined. “Yes..” you answered breathlessly. The temptation to keep doing that was overwhelming. But he once again wrapped his arms around you, rubbing your back as the two of you comfortably dozed off, finally relaxed after so much stress of the morning.

Hours later, you stirred, feeling Pedro still underneath you. At the feel of you moving, he stretched a bit before settling with his arms around you again. “Morning, baby” he hummed. “Guess we fell asleep,” you smiled.

“Some of the best sleep I've had in a while, here with you.”

“Same here.” You blinked your eyes open, kissing him on the lips with a peck. “What time is it?”

He turned his head to look at the clock on your TV. “5 o’clock” he laughed. “Guess we both needed some rest.” 

“Mmmm, I guess so,” you hummed, settling into him more.

“Good thing I brought nonperishables. Are you hungry?”

You pondered. “Yeah, I am,” you looked into his deep brown eyes. “Breakfast for dinner?” You smiled at him.

“Sounds perfect.” He pecked your lips before you slid off his lap, the two of you standing to stretch. It wasn't long that you two stood apart before you leapt forward again to give him a hug. He laughed, hugging you back. “I'll never get tired of being in your arms,” you smiled into his chest, breathing in his scent.

“I'll never get tired of holding you in mine,” he pulled his face back to look at you.

“Now let's eat! I'm starved,” you scampered towards the kitchen, him giving a gentle pat to your butt before hugging you from behind as you grabbed the breakfast foods. You giggled, setting food on plates as he kissed your neck, still wrapped around you from behind. “I'm starving too,” he replied back to your earlier statement with a growl, biting your ear.

“Pedro!” You giggled, smacking his arm gently. He chuckled, pulling away and grabbing his plate as you both headed to the table.

The two of you ate, filling the space with light conversation, both of you occasionally sneaking Skipper some bites under the table. He could get used to having two humans spoiling him.

The chatter came to a natural pause, eating in silence and smiling at each other across the table. Pedro stopped eating, wiping his hands and continuing to stare at you. You laughed, asking him what was up. Suddenly, he looked nervous.

“I, uh…” he rubbed his neck. “I was going to wait until after we had at least a first date to say this, but…” he trailed off, and your mind spiraled. Is he breaking up with me? Is he not interested anymore? What's wrong?

“I was wondering if… you'd be my girlfriend? Exclusively?” His cheeks flushed.

You stammered, dropping your fork on the plate. “You… you want… me to be your girlfriend?” You smiled.

He nodded. “If… you'll have me.”

“You want to be my boyfriend?” He nodded again, looking down at the table.

“Yes. Yes, are you kidding? Please! I'd love nothing more.” You grinned, jumping out of your chair to move to him.

He stood, pulling you into a hug. “Really?” He smiled at you.

“Really,” you nodded. “Now kiss me,” you held his face.

“Gladly,” he pulled you closer, kissing you deeply, his tongue asking for entrance to your mouth. You squealed, surprised, but letting him in. You'd never experienced this sensation before. But it was… incredible.

He licked your lips, the two of you exploring the inside of each other's mouths, tongues dancing together. The kiss was heated and deeper than ever before, both of you finally pulling away for air, him coming back in to peck your lips a few times, sucking your lip between his own. You sighed shakily. “Wow.”

“I love kissing you,” he smiled against your lips.

“I love kissing you. You're a good kisser,” you smiled back.

“So are you,” he smirked. “My beautiful girlfriend.” He gave a kiss. “How about that date tomorrow?” He pulled away to look at you, letting his hand rub across your lower back, just above your butt.

“I'd love to,” you stroked his face. “My handsome boyfriend.” You wrapped your arms around him again, blissfully.

“Tomorrow,” you two sighed in unison.

@pedrotonin @starcrossed02 @lightupsketchersperson @cartoon-garbage04 @tyferbebe @maryfanson @gwendibley84 @faithfullyyours2000 @brilliantopposite187 @hc-geralt-23 @jenniferpendragon @winchestergypsy90 @red-red-rogue @theendwhereibegin @lottieellz101 @oliversaurus @kyga01 @milly-louise @titabel @taz-97 @stefanibear003 @marantha @fandomoniumflurry @ilovemybrown-eyedbabygirl @leiadjarin @hmneighbors

Thank you for reading!!! Let me know what you think ❤️

Taglist: (Want in? Let me know!)

[kmclaude]

Ive been listening to Jesus He Knows Me lately (Ghost just released the music video for their cover and its great) and its got me thinking of an AU were Tiefer goes on to become like a superstar priest/televangelist. Puts on an act about how Jesus saved him from his terrible childhood abuse, Jehan is his protege who he treats as his own son after his father died, maybe he's even got a wife he pretends to love (only in front of others) Absolute debauchery and abuse out of the public eye of course

not me like 'he could marry his sister' no but he sure could marry a wife that looks like her (honestly she fits the blonde t r a d wife look)

i am devouring this, brilliant, debauched, lovely

(honestly I was thinking about a question @idalwaves asked or reblogged about if being a different flavor of christian would like...how it would change tiefer or jehan's relationship to their sexuality or something -- like would bein southern baptist or fundie work -- and anyway it had me thinking about basically how catholicism is perfect for someone like tiefer who is gay and loathes women, whereas something like fundie or southern baptist that expects a patriarchical figure with a wife and kid, the family man archetype, would be painful for him. like torture to have to fake a loving marriage to a woman.)

BUT IT WOULD BE DECADENT god cuz he can be charming, put on a southern drawl (his accent is southern but different southern, cajun southern, and massaged away by a more new orleanian accent flattened out), lie and lie and lie -- has a wife he fucked (timed it all right and everything, natural family planning and all) until she got pregnant (thankfully quickly) because that's what she wanted, that's what was expected -- and if he works extra hard and after hours and away from her and the home its for god, it's the right thing, it's what she signed up for, of couuuuurse he loves her, ignore that he won't touch her except for briefly in public or when she needles wanting another child (and if he knocks her up enough and then crushes some pills in her food or drink to get rid of it because three's e-fucking-nough, well, hey, what she doesn't know won't hurt her...)

AND JEHAN WELL......things could be the same: dead exlover friend's son is left without a father and, well....wouldn't be too odd for him to offer to a new widow and new mother to take her eldest (his godson) under his wing, later even let him live with them (because he only has daughters so far and one day he won't be around -- makes sense to have someone ready to take over after he's gone -- jehan would be perfect for that -- in fact, it's not his idea's, it's God's even, God put it in his heart that jehan would take up after him -- so why not let him spend a summer with them...and winter...and spring...)

and you KNOW he is fucking jehan -- maybe he waits a bit longer than canonically, properly has him under his thumb until he's fifteen or sixteen (very much the adolescens that he finds attractive) or maybe it starts right after nathan died (he's not even attracted to a 10 year old's body -- not that canonically he's into a 12 year old's body either but at least puberty is hitting and it reminds him of him and nathan in their youth and he's not coping well -- but it's a heady thing, power, and he's been able to get wealth and opened doors and it's a far cry from being a beaten faggot whore on his sister's leash being whored out so why not, why not, it's not like jehan's upset about it, he always gets to cum, and it's not like his wife knows, it's not like anyone knows, why not? who's gonna stop him? God?)

basically tiefer would be soooooo much worse. not that he's great canonically but add wealth and power without rules?! (Catholicism at least has rules.) C H R I S T.

(honestly if you wanted to get real fucked up -- televangelism would probably make this also a modern or modernish AU -- say 80s or 90s at earliest making Tiefer being born....instead of 1930s, probably 1950s or 60s...and well....the implications of being able to take photo or video....well.....well....)

[dukeoftheblackstar]

x

It's cute.

-> That said, I think people need to bank on hugs and cuddles.

My partner does this thing when when it's his birthday, he sleeps because he's been so used to not being spoiled on his birthday, he doesn't know what to do when I do surprises and shit. Doesn't know how to take my compliments and is super awkward, wanna low-key wife him up.

He'd pretend too. Sleep under the covers and watch videos on his phone at super low volume. I think he thinks I wouldn't hear because I always have headphones on, but I hear you, baby.

The struggle to not make him check the fridge be real. Because there's cake and a silly dedication card that he won't read until I'm asleep later.

But then there's thing though; he gets super mad over anything. It's adorable. He's currently raging because he can't watch the next episode of One Piece and he's mad at the villain, mad over having to wait, seething because it's not August yet and the live-action isn't here yet? Cute. Fucking cute.

But what's the cutest is the fact that he doesn't yell at me. And when he does raise his voice when he's mad, he'd apologize. Not just some crappy 'I'm sorry', he knows. Gets detailed about it. Explains why he did it. Really apologizes. Gets soft. Cute. Touchy. Cuddly for like five goddamn minutes and times it — this is the part where I want to strangle him sometimes, but like bae, Ilysm >: gimme curly, long-hair sons please?

Chatty when he's drunk too. Adorable. Spills so much tea in their metal scene/music scene it's obscene. Goes in depth with past trauma, childhood nightmares, etc. opens up like this gorgeous flower and then acts all tough the next day.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm the problem. It's not that I want to fix him, gods no. I don't want to fix anyone because it's not my job? Not my role? My reason for being is to be there until you're ready to fix yourself. Push you a little, sure — but ultimately, it's you babe.

He's progressing. Doing great on his own. Texts when he can. Stays at home when he can. Does the dishes because these mfkn hands of mine aren't built for that shit. Cooks. Brings food when I'm at work. Banter is also supreme. Wanna punch him in the face so bad ♥.

[gaykarstaagforever]

My YouTube Rewind Top 10 for 2022, based generally on time "viewed" (Starting 7 months ago, I drive for a living now, so "Can I just listen to it?" is weighted very heavily here).

(Also I am 40 so this is a very Dad Content list. Which is weird because I am not a dad and do not follow the sportsball. But Dadness still infiltrated things a bit. There are no golf or sportstalk channels, don't worry. Not yet, anyway.)

1. The Weekly Planet -- Generalist nerd media podcast out of Melbourne, Australia. Hands down the only good podcast on the entire Internet. Their Best Of compilations from years past are required listening and relistening. Also they do a short weekly show about movies and TV shows called Caravan of Garbage that is the bar by which all others are judged, and always come up short.

2. DankPods -- Sydney, Australian, retro mp3 player channel that has now expanded into general audio hardware reviews. But oh, so much more is going on here. This guy is one of the funniest, most energetic creators on the platform. Even if you don't care about anything he is interested in, you will love watching him talk (and scream) about it. Co-starring Frank the Snake. He also has two side channels about fixing up trashed Australian cars and drumming (he is a drummer by trade) that are just as good.

3. That Chapter -- True crime with a sense of humor, that is only occasionally mean-spirited. But even in those cases it is usually in the service of bad Dad Jokes so that's okay. He always tries to include actual 911 calls and trial footage, 20+ minutes, here is what happened, in a straightforward way that respects your intelligence. None of that "creating a narrative" horseshit that make true crime podcasts by actual journalists un-fucking-bearable 10 hour slogs that pretend they are saying something profound about the universe by the end. They're not. Stop paying 8 people to produce these; maybe then you wouldn't have to shill for whatever criminally-overpriced nonsense Peloton just invented. True crime podcasts suck, That Chapter is why.

4. Morbid Midnight -- He covers what I can only call "disasters," some true crime, others extreme sports accidents, also plenty of generally horrendous historical events. Lots of stories about people being blown off of mountain sides or getting trapped in caves. His subdued delivery of dark content is like what Chills pulled off, back before it became a meme and a parody of itself. I don't know why I like hearing about adventurous people dying horribly. Probably because I can then feel smug about how I wasn't so stupid as to dive into a cave like a big stupid idiot, you idiots. You shouldn't have been doing that. You should just get drunk and watch YouTube like me. See? They're the losers, not me.

5. Professor of Rock -- Oh god, the Dad. This is a daily upload channel in which Adam Reader, the Professor of Rock, talks about Dad Rock, and how great Dad Rock is, and how modern not-Dad Rock sucks. Tons of classic rock trivia, and also snippets of long-form interviews with the artists who made this stuff. This is the channel you are forced to admit is good and you like while simultaneously being embarrassed about how old that makes you look. But that's not Adam's fault. Seriously, a good channel for music nerds.

6. Cathode Ray Dude [CRD] -- He started doing short-form videos about the old camcorders he collected. He now does long videos about fascinating and obscure cul de sacs in tech history, routinely with live demonstrations of said tech. And yes, he almost always ends up explaining how this wonky failed media format can actually be a metaphor for our sad, short little lives. Which would be forced journo bullshit. Except it always ends up forcing me to respect the legions of unsung engineers and desperate marketing executives who had a hand in creating our modern technocratic world, even if only by failing spectacularly. These goofy creations really are artifacts of entire little worlds, many of them long-dead and forgotten. It is as sad and funny as it is fascinating.

7. Snipe and Wib -- A Warhammer 40,000 channel, but HOLD ON, this is one of the good ones! They do a show called Codex Compliant that goes through the published history of Warhammer lore from Rogue Trader in the mid-1980s to now. They love 'grimdark' and Space Marines as much as they understand that all of it was created as a cheeky English parody of melodramatic, misogynistic total-war fantasy worlds. I always thought Warhammer 40K was a boring expensive thing for the grossest WASP nerd boys before I watched Snipe and Wib. Now I know that Warhammer 40K is a boring expensive thing for EVERYONE. I'm not buying and painting miniatures or arguing over protractors yet, but I kind of want to because of Snipe and Wib. I at least get it now. It is a lot to manage, but a lot of it is pretty cool.

8. Imbrandonfarris -- Like I have to explain who Brandon Farris is. He is a charismatic guy who hurts himself and destroys his own apartment to entertain the world's children. And he doesn't say swears so they're allowed to watch it. And BOY, do they watch it! This is content for 8 year olds. But goddamn it if it isn't really, really GOOD content for 8 year olds, the kind the rest of the family can enjoy, too. Brandon is charming as hell, his story is heartwarming, his family is adorable, and you don't even resent him for recently buying a palatial estate in which he can spray foam on everything. This is a guy who exists to do the stupid shit the rest of us wish we could do, and he kills himself doing it, and the world has rightly responded by rewarding him for it. Good on you, Brandon. Also it is just really funny to watch a man destroy a bedroom with an exploding pumpkin filled with glitter and then fall down.

9. Warlockracy -- Russian-based gaming channel that mostly posts long-form analyses of PC RPGs, especially those in the isometric family of the original Fallout games. These games maintain a huge cultural influence on gamers in Russia and Eastern Europe, and being one of those, Warlockracy uses his platform to give the rest of us an insider's perspective of that world. Seriously, if you want to understand modern Russia, and even the war in Ukraine, Warlockracy casually explains complex aspects of both of these, via the easily-grasped context of games like STALKER and Vampire the Masquerade: Bloodlines. I believe he is still in Russia, so I don't know how he pulls off this kind of commentary at this point and hasn't gotten in trouble yet. But he keeps doing it, and with an easy sense of humor that I cannot comprehend, having to live under those circumstances. I wish him the best, and hope to enjoy his content as long as it lasts.

10. Thew Adams -- Thew reviews Transformers. But that...that doesn't begin to cover it. Threw Adams is a ray of sunshine on YouTube, and everyone needs to watch his videos. Don't care about Transformers? Doesn't matter. Seriously. It DOESN'T MATTER. You will like Threw. You will never see a more delightful person. And no matter your gender or sexuality, if you don't want to kinda kiss him on the mouth, you're not human. Thew makes everything fun, especially when he doesn't like something. Thew Adams is the bit of chocolate you let yourself have every day because no, you don't NEED IT, but it makes you happy, goddammit. Watch Thew. Thew is good.

Honorable Mentions (in that, these are consistently good channels I have liked for years, even if their specific content every year might not be perpetually notable):

Jenny Nicholson

Ashens

LGR

Techmoan

PeanutButterGamer / Peebs

Scott the Woz

Your Dinosaurs are Wrong

Secret Galaxy (formerly Toy Galaxy)

Drew Gooden

Pyrocynical

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Grunge-Metal Geralt

Hi, im fucking trash for the idea of Geralt being the front man for a Five Finger Death Punch type band and my brain wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it. This music genre is my bread and butter and I think Geralt’s repressed but highly emotional ass would fit right in. Yes im using another Hozier song, no i dont wanna hear anything about it. I’m a basic bitch and ive made my peace with it

Warnings: i honestly have no idea, its a little horny, little emotional, but theres no actual character interaction?, its at a concert venue? idk yall.

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Jaskier was… out of his comfort zone.

It’s not that he didn’t like the grunge-metal music, he just hadn’t listened to much and he was not used to the energy. People were yelling and screaming and the opener hadn’t even come on yet. He didn’t feel unsafe, far from it. Several people had checked to see if he was okay, seeing as he was the only person in the entire arena wearing a sweater that wasn't ripped or faded to hell. It was just a far cry from the shows he was used to. 

He played folky-blues. This was nothing like his shows. 

When the lights went down the crowd was deafening, all moving as one to rush the front of the floor, not giving a single fuck about tickets. 

The openers were exciting, and Jaskier was surprised by some of the concepts and messages behind the music. It wasn’t what he’d expected at all and he found himself searching them up on Spotify to listen later. 

Then came The Witchers. 

Eskel and Lambert made their energetic entrance, followed by Aiden calmly walking to his drums and sitting as if he were walking into a college class. But Geralt was nowhere in sight. The one person Jaskier had actually come to see. 

He’d seen a video clip from a previous concert where they covered one of his songs, and he was praying they’d do it again. It was lovely in a haunting-almost-threatening way, and the expression in Geralt’s posture alone was enthralling. He had to see it live. 

But Geralt was still absent as the band started to build a song. First Aiden with the beat, then Eskel’s bass, then Lambert with a melody on his electric guitar. It built and built and built to a fever pitch, taking the crowd with it. People were already jumping and screeching. Jaskier had to stand on his seat to see the stage clearly. 

Geralt’s voice echoed through the venue, low and closer to a growl than singing, but he was still nowhere to be seen.

Jaskier thought he’d been prepared, but his whole body was covered in goosebumps. He briefly wondered if this was what his friends were feeling when they listened to ASMR.

Geralt remained hidden for the whole first verse, getting the crowd even more excited than Jaskier thought possible, only for the band to go completely silent for a whole measure. When the crowd's screams reached their absolute loudest, Geralt dropped from on top of one of the jumbotrons, landing on one of the horse-sized speakers before launching into the chorus. 

Oh fuck, he was even more beautiful in person. 

He was… well he was a beast of a man. Jaskier really didn’t have another word for the way his muscles bulged and how lithe and powerful he looked springing from the speaker to join his bandmates on the main stage. His thighs filled out his black, tattered jeans and there were clear faded spots where his muscles strained the fabric too often. The thin black tank he wore did nothing but pretend the man was semi-modest. It was so tight, the only thing left up to the imagination was tan lines and the color of his nipple piercings. 

Jaskier was most entranced by his long, white, wavy hair falling past his shoulders. As the show continued and he started to sweat, a lot, it got curlier and curlier at the root. Jaskier wanted to give him a mask and some curl cream, but only after a, uhm, rough night of getting to know each other. He’d heard rumors about Geralt from hitting arenas not long after they’d left. He was quite sure they’d have a great time.

As he focused on the lyrics more and more, he was more inclined to want to wrap Geralt up in a hug and worship every part of him until he felt whole again. 

Either he’d been shown the shitty side of the genre, or The Witchers were exceptions to the rule of content. Jaskier was almost moved to tears a few different times.

Finally, about an hour into Jaskier mindlessly feasting his eyes on the front man, Geralt leapt onto another speaker and sat down, breathing hard and grinning from ear to ear. 

“You still with us?”

The unholy screech from the crowd left no doubt they were just as excited, if not more so, than when they’d arrived. 

“Good! Good..” he trailed off, chuckling as he lowered the mic to take a breath, “We’re gonna slow it down for a minute,” he leaned forward and held the mic away as Eskel shouted something up at him to which he laughed and flipped him off. 

“As I was saying, we’re gonna yearn for a minute or two and do a cover. Song by Jaskier called ‘Talk’.”

The crowd lost their shit again, various pride flags popping up throughout the stands. 

Geralt chuckled and raised his combat boot, showing off the bi flag colored treads, earning another round of screams. If this is what the grunge-metal scene was like, Jaskier had been missing out his entire life. Sure his fans were sweet and supportive and loving when he’d come out. But this was electric and feral and completely addictive.

Lambert struck the opening chord to Jaskier’s song and the crowd settled to a gentle hum, setting the tone immediately, as if they all knew exactly what was coming. 

Geralt closed his eyes as he tapped his thigh with one finger, keeping time before his rumbling baritone hit Jaskier like a freight train. 

“I’d be the voice that urged Orpheus when her body was found…”

Jaskier could have collapsed right there. He knew he was staring like a lovesick idiot, but hell, everyone around him was too. When the chorus hit and Eskel came in with a heavy bass line he nearly fell off his chair. Geralt’s intensity raised with the addition of the backup but he didn’t move. He stayed seated, swaying slightly, with his eyes closed as he crooned out the words Jaskier had sobbed as he wrote, broken hearted and miserable. 

It was surreal. 

Sure he’d seen other covers. Sure they’d been lovely. But he wanted to listen to this and only this as he fell asleep for the rest of his life. He’d never play it again if he could only hear it one more time. 

After the last verse Lambert launched into a guitar solo while Geralt jumped off the speaker and meandered to the center of the stage to slot his mic back in it’s stand. He gripped it like a lifeline when Lambert held one last note for as long as his instrument would allow and only started singing the last chorus when it was almost silent. 

“I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things I would do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you

I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things we could do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you”

His expression looked hopeless and utterly desperate as he crooned out the last two lines. He let his hair fall to cover his face and Jaskier could just barely hear his panting breath over the sound system as the crowd exploded. Geralt tipped his head back and took two deep breaths before straightening up and getting on with the show but Jaskier was stuck. 

He was vaguely aware of someone taking a picture of him, but he really couldn’t care less. The fact that Geralt moved right on to a song called ‘Burn Motherfucker Burn’ didn’t matter either. 

Jaskier jumped down from his arena seat, whipping out his phone and sending the band a tweet, because apparently that’s what musicians did now?

“Record it. Please. It’s either that or sing me to sleep every night. You choose.”

He stayed for the rest of the show and walked to his car in a haze. Before he backed out of his spot he checked his phone like always and his heart nearly stopped at the two top notifications. 

One public reply: “Both? -G”

And one direct message: “If you’re still here and want to grab a drink, I’m just backstage.” 

[another-fantasy-world]

The Idol’s Inspiration

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Title: The Idol’s Inspiration

Pairing: Valkyrae || Rachell x Fem! Reader

Summary: In which the international singer find’s her inspiration in a certain brown eyed-often screaming- streamer

Warnings: None? Fluff. Awkward Crushing. Top Rae? (Oh Gosh)

Word Count: 2,905 Words

@short-kid27​ helped me with this one. Go check her out she’s actually great

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-

You scoffed when you saw what your bandmate tweeted out, tweeting as if he wasn’t using his phone either. Deciding to throw something at him, you spot a plastic perfume bottle, reaching out for it, only for Luna, your other bandmate to slap your hands of her perfume bottle.

“Don’t you dare.” She playfully glares before turning back to her original position, with her hair stylist tending to her long reddish-brown hair.

“Sebastian, you are so lucky you’re on the other side of the room right now or I swear to God, you would have a concussion.” You frowned, before turning back to your phone, further proving Sebastian’s point.

“See?! What are you even doing?” He loudly asks, you barely hearing him from the noise of blowdryers.

“Writing.” You answered, annoyed. It wasn’t a lie tho, You were now writing a new song, since your management once again are rushing you to write at least 12 songs for your new album.

“We wrote 3 songs yesterday. Calm down.” Your bassist, Luna reassured you, who just finished her glams.

“We’re supposed to be finished with this by the end of the month. How am I supposed to calm down?” You complained.

Ever since your band, Coldify, got enough attention, your management barely gave you enough time to just breathe and write like you used to, How were you supposed to produce quality music?

“Choco Milk?” Jace, your drummer offers you his second cup

“No thank you. Hot sweet things stress my throat. Maybe later though.” You stood up, thanking your stylists, before changing into your casual clothes, since you would be doing a Q and A session first as a soundcheck and also for extra fan service before the concert proper.

Once you finished changing, you walked out of your dressing room, only to find that your bandmates are now all set up, all except you.

Jace is fiddling with his drum sticks

Luna is tuning her bass guitar

And Sebastian is playing a random tune on his electric guitar.

You rolled your eyes at them, before slinging your own acoustic guitar over your shoulder, the familiar weight and pressure of it’s strap makes you smile.

“Are we ready guys? We can start now, there’s only 5 minutes left.” You asked them, plugging in your “in-ears”

They all nodded at you and you guys started to do your signature intro, you playing a few notes on your acoustic, followed by Sebastian and Luna, then you all run out, hearing the screams of your fans intensify, before Jace started banging on his drums, ending your intro with all of you guys harmonizing your band name and lifting your right arms up, showing the compass tattooed into the insides of your wrists, symbolizing your band and the friendship that will never grow old.

“What is up LA!?” You loudly said into the mic, chuckling when they screamed louder than your own mic.

“Well, we certainly need to up the mic volume later.” Luna giggled, sitting on one of the chairs positioned in the middle of the stage.

“Mhhmmn. Let’s all calm down first yes? You guys save your energy for later.” Sebastian winked into the crowd, also sitting on one of the chairs, with his mic in his hand.

“Great, great. We’re all settled in, Please sit down and let’s start this 1 and a half hour Q and A? Soundcheck? Fan service? Whatever you want to call this whole shebang.” You joked, thanking the staff that gave you your own water bottle.

“You know the drill, if you don’t that’s fine. My name is Luna and I am the one who plays the amazing silver-gray bass back there.” Luna introduces herself

“That amazing silver-gray bass that you would marry someday. I swear you are inlove with that thing.” Sebastian teased, earning him a loud smack to the shoulder.

“That is animal abuse. Stop it.” You hold in your laugh, but bursted out laughing anyways when you saw the appalled look on his face.

“My name is Jace. And I bang my sticks into a hallow cylindrical thing for a living. I heard they’re called drums but whatever. I also live with these idiots and I, unfortunately, am the one who holds their leashes.” Jace introduces himself, smiling into the crowd

“Okay, Father. My Name is Sebastian. aka the most attractive one in this group. I play the guitarrrrrr. You guys can call me Seb, Sebastian or Daddy. Your choice.” He winked.

“Ew.” All three of you pretended to gagged, before laughing at Sebastian’s pouting face, your audience also laughing at your antics.

“Okay- Okay, Stop. We need to be serious. Gosh. My name’s Y/N! And I’m your local sapphic lead singer. Yes, I need to say that everyday because people still debate that I’m straight. It’s annoying” You introduce, taking a sip of your water

“Right. So this is how it’s gonna work. There are multiple Coldify interrogators, as we call them, roaming around, all you have to do, is raise your hand, first one they see wins the first question. And the cycle continues until we run out of time.” You explained

“HmmHmmn. So are you guys ready?” Luna asks, earning a few “Yes!” and “WHOOOOO” making all you guys chuckle.

“Okaaaay! on 3. 1,2,3! OH! That redhead with the all black attire. I like that.” Sebastian calls, waiting for the guy in the uniform to hand the girl the mic.

“What’s your name love?” Jace asked the now blushing girl

“Ah. Kadie. I just wanna say that I am such a big fan and I wanted to know if, besides the tattoo you guys have right now, the compass, are you guys still planning on getting a matching tattoo?”

“Ooooh. Tattooes. Hmm. I personally would love to have another tattoo. But you see, Sebastian here cried when we first tattoed. And I am not looking forward to that at all.” Luna answered, laughing when Sebastian whined.

“Oh yeah. No. Not again.” Jace agreed, while you just smiled and nodded.

“Next Question Please.” Sebastian interjected before you could even talk

“Hi my name’s Catherine-” You guys interrupted her to say hi

“Hehe. Hi. Uhm, I wanted to know if you guys have like, favourite youtubers or streamers?” She asks shyly, which made you smile.

“Oooooo. Okay, now you guys get to know why I tweeted that earlier.” Sebastian chuckles

“Okay Mr. Snitch. But uhm. I would have to say... Sykkuno. His voice is just the best-”

“Excuse me? Corpse?! Hello? Corpse has the best voice don’t even. He’s my favourite, what you said was just Corpse slander” Sebastian interrupts Luna, to which Luna answered with a glare.

“Uh-huh. Okay. As I was saying, Corpse’s voice is good, but Syk’s is just this wholesome anime type voice that just melt’s your heart you know? He should be a voice actor for like, an anime protagonist. AND HIS PERSONALITY IS SO GOOD AND WHOLESOME LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?” Luna gushes, nodding to Jace before she goes on a full rant

“I’m sure you won’t match with him, expecially since he’s quiet and you’re loud and abnoxious.” Sebastian casually says

“You know what?”

“Pokimane...” Jace speaks into the mic, interrupting the siblings from fighting. “...Because she’s actually a really good gamer, and she also has a cat called called “Mimi” and that’s major points in my book.” Jace says, smiling.

“Hmm. That’s actually a tough choice... I would have to say-” You were interrupted when your phone let out a noise, letting you know you forgot to silent it.

“BABUSHKA!” Your face felt hot as you desperately tried to put your phone in silent, but it was too late.

“My phone just outed me what the hell?” You mumbled into the mic, hiding your face as you hear your fans laugh and coo at your cuteness and embarrassment.

“Anyways, if that didn’t answer your question, I don’t know what will. But uhm, Valkyrae. 100 percent. She’s just really skilled in video games and has probably played more games than me. Also, she’s absolutely fucking gorgeous and I just love her personality and all.” You smiled, still feeling a little bit embarrassed

“I just love her personality- Please, last night you fell asleep to her playing a horror game. She screams alot in that video, I’m just saying. How could you sleep to literally her screaming in your ear?” Sebastian shrugs, ignoring the glares you sent him

“Just this morning, you were frowning because there was another viper on the team Rae was fighting against in Valorant, and you accused that viper of being a copycat.” Jace added

“Or the fact that you always flinch, or dodge and curse whenever someone shoots at Rae-” Luna finishes making you cover her mouth before she says something more

“Okay. I think it’s pretty obvious that I have a crush on Valkyrae but please- Stop.” You grumbled, frowning playfully at your fans when they awed at your band’s interaction.

“Next Fucking Question Please.” You huffed, closing your eyes and leaning back into your seat, trying to settle your beating heart

Rae will for sure see that. Oh my god. Thoughts of Rae seeing your clip of literally simping for her has your heart running marathons.

“Hi! Uhm, this question is for Y/N”

You hear the gasps of your bandmates, but you pay no attention to it since you were still gay panicking inside

“What will you do if you ever met Valkyrae in person?” a familiar voice echoed in your ears, you of course can’t figure out who it is.

“I honestly don’t know how I would react. Maybe faint? But then probably hug her? I dunno? Kiss her cheek maybe? I mean, how would you react if you meet your long time crush?” You answered mindlessly, chuckling silently knowing that you probably faint and be knocked out for God knows how long. Or maybe you’d fumble and embarrass yourself.

You hear your bandmates join in the laughter with the audience, and that made you open your eyes, throwing a confused glace to Luna who just patted your back and made eye contact with who, you presume, asked the question.

You followed her gaze, eyes widening when you saw the brown-eyed brunette beauty holding the mic. Your brain lagged, trying to comprehend the situation.

“Uhm, I mean- Unless, You know? She’s uncomfortable about it. I don’t wanna make her uncomfy, you get me? First impressions are a thing. I mean- I’m just gonna shut up.” You just spat words out before your brain could even comprehend it.

Come on Y/N keep it together. She gotta think that you’re cool. Not an awkward gay mess.

“Pfft- Little too late for the first impressions that included you being cool.” Jace threw his empty water bottle at you

“...I said that aloud didn’t I?” You asked, now trying to hide your face behind Luna’s back, who’s doubling over from laughter

“Please, someone tag me when you decide to upload this very moment. I wanna blackmail Y/N with it.” Sebastian wheezed out.

“I think we can do something with the hugging thing. Just don’t faint on me.” Your eyes snapped to Rae’s as you see the smirk etched on her face, her hands still holding the microphone

Your eyes widen as your fans, screamed and a series of “OOOOOOHHHH” and “Get it Y/N!” erupted, making your embarrassment amplify even more.

“Is it embarrass Y/N day today? God, please- Next Question please. Oh Jesus.” You put your face in your hands, trying to hide.

Thankfully, they didn’t pry anymore, your embarrassment slowly subsiding as they asked about your daily life, career, albums and upcoming awards. After finishing a couple more questions, you guys sang a couple cover songs, and that’s what concluded your soundcheck. (Sebastian managed to sneak in Janet’s PETTY song, which you rolled your eyes on but sang nonetheless.)

You walked out and to the backstage as you shoved Sebastian playfully for making kissy faces.

“Y/N and Rachell sitting on a tree-” He was suddenly cut off by someone

“K-I-S-S-I-N-G” Your gaze wonders to Pokimane, or Imane who just interrupted Sebastian

“Kissing?! Isn’t it a bit too early for that? Why would they kiss-” Sykkuno says glancing between Rae and I

You wondered if they said anything else because you’re going to be honest to yourself, you were only looking at Rae’s eyes. The deep brown orbs you only ever saw through your screen, was now staring right back at you, her brunette hair tied up in a bun- She’s staring back at you.

Quickly averting your eyes, you felt yourself grow shy, you now also find your shoes very attractive.

“Keep your head up or else you would faint on me and I don’t want that. I prefer to hug a conscious person, Thank you very much.” you lifted your head so fast you could’ve given yourself a whiplash. Darting your eyes around Rae, you quickly find that your friends + Imane and Sykkuno have left the both of you alone.

“Sorry. You just caught me off guard there. Hi! Uhm. I really don’t know what to say to you- Uhm.” You rub the back of your neck, nervously smiling at Rae you in turn smirked at you, raising her brow in the process.

She quietly chuckles before opening her arms, signaling for a hug, to which you launched yourself in, trying not to breathe because that would be so weird.

“Okay so now can you take out your knife and stab me just to make sure that this is real.” You stated, looking directly into her eyes

“...But I’m not the Impostor?”

“...Okay that’s clever-” You laughed, taking a sip out of your water bottle, leading her to your dressing room

“Speaking of, do you mind if I play with you guys sometimes? I’ll find time, I promise.” You say, watching the time considering you only have half an hour to change and get ready, not to mention your crush is right in front of you as well.

“Wait really? Yeah! Just DM me on twitter! I’ll organize a lobby just for you.” She replies, plopping herself on the sofa you have.

“Awe, I feel so... special” You smiled, finally composing yourself, emerging from behind the curtains, already in your performance outfit

“The almighty Creator of the Year, creating a lobby? For lil ol m-” You were greeted with a facefull of pillows thrown at you, just for that statement. Which made you laugh.

“Shut up.” She grinned

“I’m sorry, m’lady” You curtsied playfully, expecting her to start smacking your shoulders, instead when you lifted your head up, she was just sitting there with a soft smile on her face.

“You’re wearing my merch.” She stated

You widened your eyes then looked down, the hoodie that you just randomly picked up was her merch.

“I’m sorry, do you want it back?” You spit the words out before your mind could comprehend how idiotic that sounded

Rae bursted out laughing at your statement, putting her hand over her mouth while doubling over. You rolled your eyes at her and plopped down on the sofa, crossing your arms.

“Yeah, Yeah. Go on. Laugh. At least I can spell broccoli right.” You teased, poking her side

“OKAY! LISTEN HERE HOTSHOT! I-”  she was interrupted by a series of knocks on the door.

“Y/N! PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE DECENT AND IS NOT SEDUCING RAE BECAUSE THAT’S JUST WRONG” Sebastian loudly asked through the door

“Oh My God. Please just kill me.” You rubbed your face with your hands

“I’m pretty sure I’ll be the one doing the seducing but okay.” You hear her mumble under her breath, making you look at her with a scandalized look on your face

“DOOR’S UNLOCKED SEBASTIAN. DON’T BE AN IDIOT..” You replied

“Don’t mind him Y/N We’re just coming in to say that you have 5 minutes until we have to go onstage.” Luna softly replies, shoving Sebastian out your field of view.

“I’ll be right there Lune.” You stood up, smiling at Rae

“I guess that’s it. I’ll talk to you later? I think? Just check your DM’s soon yeah?” She pulls you into a hug, kissing your cheek as she pulls away.

“Good Luck out there. I know you’ll do great.” She smiles, walking out, leaving you to your thoughts

“Huh?” You touched your cheek, a smile slowly paints itself upon your face

"Come on, lovergirl we're running late." Jace drapes his arm around your shoulder

"She kissed my cheek." You say, still shocked

"Lucky You." Jace says, his ears reddening.

...lucky bastard

"POKI KISSED YOU TOO DIDN'T SHE?!" You screeched

'Hush!" His cheeks are also red now.

"Huh. I guess today's our lucky day." You grinned, now extremely happy and hyped

"Oh, check your e-mail now by the way. Manager says she sent our line up there." he pats your back, getting into his position, as best as he can considering the stage is now pitch black

"Huh. Okay." You pulled out your phone, sending a piece of paper flying. Bending down to pick it up, you feel your heart soften into mush and then it decides to run another marathon.

Just incase my Twitter DM's don't work, or if I'm streaming. xx 09-xxx-xxx-xxx

"Be still, my beating heart." You sighed out

Valkyrae just gave you her phone number

[spikybanana]

Decided to send it this way because apparently I can add music again at random?? (lies. it worked last night? i dunno. i'm not editing) Anyhow, have fun. Lots of great songs here, but not everyone's taste. The 90s were...an odd time, for music especially, but I'll always love it. (i wised up this time and went with spotify links instead of youtube because some of these videos are...wild)

Zombie by The Cranberries (fun fact about this one: Bad Wolves recently covered it and it is fantastic)

Everlong (acoustic) by Foo Fighters (the regular version is fine too but acoustic is far superior)

What's My Age Again by Blink-182 (barely 90s, but still within the decade)

One Headlight by The Wallflowers

Hunger Strike by Temple of the Dog

Iris by Goo Goo Dolls

Disarm by Smashing Pumpkins (nasally, yes. still good)

Nookie by Limp Bizkit (look, i'm not going to sit here and say that i actually like this song, but you can't dive into the 90s without experiencing Nookie at least once. and it brings back fun memories)

Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit (on the slightly better side of Limp Bizkit, though that side is admittedly limited)

Comedown by Bush (but look, if you like the music and his voice, just look up Bush period. they're fantastic and they've been around forever. they released an album in 2011 that's just wonderful)

Off He Goes by Pearl Jam (i am admittedly not the largest fan of Pearl Jam - though Sirens is a great song, just a later release - but this song hits a place that's just ugh. i even wrote a fic based around it years ago)

Let Her Cry by Hootie and the Blowfish (there's a lot of flack around them but this song is great. people can argue with me all they want, i'll never hear it)

I'm going to stop now because I could honestly go on and on. But I'll give you all you want from any decade between now and the 50's. I've got them all.

ALRIGHT YES LETS GO I'M SO EXCITED. SORRY this took me so long to get around to but guess who finally got stable wifi for an hour lmao.

the links work! that's neat.

Zombies: I've always known the chorus, in the context of a um philosophy conjecture about perfectly normal looking persons who actually have no consciousness/ mind. but this is somehow the first time I heard the whole song properly. I love this voice, got chills from the first line of lyrics. and oh my fucking god, the cover is brilliant yes!

Everlong: I think I like the acoustic version better too. it's so much more intimate and kind of unsettling in the tugging-on-your-heartstring way?? oh also I just realised I've listened to The Pretender by Foo Fighters a lot recently

What's my age again: oh this is so fun. I see and hear the "fuck all this I don't want to adult also listen *insert rly fucking dumb joke*"

One headlight: I like these lyrics! It reminds me of Norwegian Woods but more hopeful.

Hunger Strike: hm this is a bit slow on first listen. I think I like the sounds and the voice more than the lyrics

Iris: okay yeah this is nice, sounds kind of weightless!

Disarm: THIS VOICE is so. recognisable. no that's not the word. it's still so strange but I'm so fascinated, like I'd listen more and hyperfixate on that voice for hours. Also the lyrics reminded me of remus.

Nookie: lyrics of songs are slow to make sense to me in general but this one is especially confusing lmao. also I'd still prefer the loud 'bzzzzz' to tech electro pop whatever it's called

Break Limit: ahahaha I might take your word for it r.e. the rest of the album. I'm not cool enough for this ie will probably only likes rap when it's in a musical

Comedown: eh. (I don't know what in my brain is deciding all this. it's probably more a coin toss.) (wait wait wait no it got better) (lyrics are still *shrug*) (they've got so much stuff though?? & are still around!) (More Than Machines sounds cool)

Off He Goes: oooh. ye I like this one. can I 👀 👀 👀, that fic 👀 👀,,, any chance? 👀 👀 👀 👀

Let Her Cry: flackety flack, probably nothing I'd ever even come across. I like this song. It's been a while since a song reminded me of a (non-fictional) person ;3;

[pips-fics]

ask by @writercirrus / @sickiecirrus (be sure to check out her fantastic writing!) : Hi!! My favorite fic is the one where Han gets sick and calls Channie who runs over and helps him. Idk why but I keep rereading. Your stories are always well written!! I’ve never been like LET ME EDIT THIS PLZZZ like I do with most other fanfics!! I do have a request... Channie gets the stomach flu and doesn’t want to be babied or fussed over but finally gives in and lets his members take care of him (idk why but I feel like Channie would be like that)

big thanks to madeline once again for the lovely title! <3 and thank you to cirrus for the kind words and their request, it was a lot of fun to write :D

tw: vomiting, insomnia, overworking

take a rest, hyung –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

“you are not allowed to leave your bed today.” minho had taken one look at chan and decided to lay down the law. behind him, felix cackled.

“chan stay in bed challenge!”

chan groaned. that was the thing about these two: he couldn’t say no to either of them. felix because saying no to him felt like bullying a small child; minho because he already knew chan disagreed and clearly did not care. chan tried anyway.

“i’m fine. you’re both just overreacting.”

jisung poked his head through the doorway, looking skeptical. “who’s overreacting?”

hope blossomed in chan’s chest. jisung would understand. “sungie! i just want to work on that one b-side, just for a bit. non strenuous activity, y’know?”

“oh,” jisung said, giving chan a quick once-over. “no.”

“what?”

“yeah, hyung, you look like you’re going to pass out. don’t move.”

it took all of chan’s willpower not to throw something in a fit of rage when jisung came over to check his temperature with the back of his hand. or it would have, except chan did feel slightly like he might pass out, actually. jisung whistled, and chan pretended like his head didn’t feel like it was splitting down the middle.

“he’s pretty warm,” jisung said to minho, who nodded as if he already knew that.

“well he’s been working non-stop recently and hardly sleeping,” hyunjin said from the doorway, quickly catching on to the situation. he took about three strides and crossed the room to press a glass of cool water to chan’s lips. chan sputtered.

“what is wrong with you all? i’m not dying, i can take care of myself.”

hyunjin looked at him skeptically. “you literally can’t, that’s the point i just made.”

rather than respond to that, chan got up and pushed his way through the small crowd that had begun to encircle him. he walked to the kitchen and then, without preamble, vomited into the sink.

after three quick, powerful, and unpleasant expulsion of his stomach contents, chan wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and turned to see seungmin starring at him, open mouthed. across the room, jeongin choked on the water he’d been drinking. chan frowned.

“what? i feel better now,” he explained. seungmin’s mouth snapped shut, then opened again.

“what. the fuck.”

chan soon found himself being marched back to his bedroom by the two youngest members of stray kids.

he wasn’t stupid. chan understood that the other boys cared about him, and that they were just trying to help. he knew it would make them feel better, so he resigned himself to allowing their fussing - just temporarily.

chan would admit that the cool towels jisung kept putting on his forehead felt nice, and it was very sweet that the boys ensured someone was with him at all times - to prevent boredom, seungmin said. but then, that was the problem - chan wouldn’t be bored if they would just let him work, but as soon as he took his laptop out, minho confiscated it.

“this is so unfair,” chan complained. minho just smirked at him, seeming to take great pleasure in chan’s annoyance.

“you can thank me later.”

chan grumbled under his breath, but thought smugly that the joke was on minho, in the end. chan had his phone hidden under the covers, so he could work on writing lyrics using that. heck, he could even plug in his AirPods an work on producing with a mobile app, if he really wanted to. chan smiled slightly, feeling clever, and then sprinted to the bathroom.

despite minho’s annoying tough love, there was something soothing about having someone there to brush chan’s sweaty bangs away from his forehead as he emptied his stomach. this time the nausea didn’t pass quite a quickly, or as completely - even after a ten minute camp out filled with productive heaving, chan still felt woozy, and he couldn’t stop his hands from shaking. he hid them in his hoodie pockets as minho guided him back to the bedroom.

things were quieter after that. most of the younger guys were at the studio practicing the dance moves for their upcoming music video, and changbin, who chan hadn’t seen all day, was probably cooped up with jisung trying to pick up the slack from chan’s day off. chan was genuinely exhausted and was tempted to actually rest, but sleep didn’t come easily with guilt hanging over him. no matter how much he told himself it was better in the long run, the knowledge that someone had to do whatever he didn’t have time for was eating chan up inside.

so, after trying and failing to sleep for about ten minutes, chan slid under the covers and got to work on his phone. he tried to be kind to himself, but he wasn’t making much progress even while he was working on stuff.

when changbin barged in and suddenly threw chan’s covers off to snatch his phone out of his hands, chan was less than pleased.

“changbin! what the fuck!”

“hyung, you’re supposed to be sleeping!” changbin said, annoyance lining his voice.

“what, did jisung tell you that?” chan felt angry tears spring to his eyes and quickly wiped them away, but he saw changbin soften.

“of course he did,” changbin said. “he’s so worried about you that he can’t get a single thing done, hyung. so please, just rest? at least let your eyes take a break from your screens?”

in the corner of the room, minho checked his watch - or the place on his wrist where the would’ve been a watch, if he’d owned one. “welp, looks like my shift is up. changbin, babysitting duty is all yours.”

changbin frowned, but took minho’s place silently. chan refused to meet his eyes.

“hyung?”

“just leave me alone, changbin, please.”

it wasn’t anger, but it came off that way. it was shame.

the thought that chan had thrown jisung off, too, and now changbin was here taking care of him - chan hated it. they were all going to get in trouble for slacking at this rate, and it was chan’s fault about three times over. truthfully, chan felt like crying, but that would only make things worse, so instead he pulled out out a notebook. on accident, he met changbin’s disapproving gaze. chan’s voice came out sounding very small.

“bin, please.”

arms crossed, changbin breathed a sigh through his nose. he didn’t say anything, but his eyes slid away from chan and he clear didn’t intend to stop him.

the guilt settled heavier than ever in chan’s already upset stomach, but he hoped making some progress on work would help him feel better. unfortunately, it wasn’t that easy. with every minute that passed, chan felt worse. he jotted down some notes, just vague ideas but most of his energy was being expended just trying to keep his stomach contents in place. by the time he admitted to himself that he was fighting a losing battle, chan could hardly move without risking making a mess.

he set his notes aside, and put a trembling hand over his mouth. his attempt to get changbin’s attention was cut off before he could even say “bin,” and it was all chan could do to swallow the sick in his throat back down. he wasn’t entirely successful, but thankfully, changbin had sprung up and handed chan the plastic bowl minho had left by his bedside.

things still weren’t pretty. chan had held the sick in for so long that once he stopped fighting it, it spewed forth with so much force that it splattered the bed - and chan’s notes. changbin scrambled to save them, but chan waved him off.

“throw them out,” he said dejectedly, right before coughing himself into another vomiting spell. at this point, chan was beyond exhausted, and the room wouldn’t stop spinning before his eyes. when he squeezed them shut, he felt even sicker and retched hollowly until changbin forced him to drink some water that chan threw up again almost immediately. chills ran through him so viciously that chan worried he might lose his grip on the bowl, and was relieved when someone else’s hands appeared to keep it steady.

by the time he was done, chan wanted absolutely nothing more than a hug. when he looked up with tears in his eyes, chan found that jeongin was the one holding the bowl and froze.

“are you all back?” it was one thing, he thought, to inconvenience changbin alone - he and changbin had been through thick and thin together, and despite chan’s guilt, he knew changbin would brush this off soon enough. he wasn’t as sure about the other members of his team. “are you okay?” chan asked, on second thought.

jeongin scoffed. “hyung, can you please stop worrying about the rest of us for one second and worry about yourself? or better yet, just let us do the worrying for you, for once.”

chan sniffled, and felt tears prick his eyes. his boys had really matured. the realization took the breath out of him for a second, and the tension went with it. he flopped back onto his pillows and nodded.

“yeah, alright, innie, i’ll give it a go.”

after that, it was a flurry of activity. tasks, apparently, had been delegated by seungmin, so changbin cleaned out the bucket, hyunjin grabbed more water, minho put the blankets in the wash, jisung brought new blankets, jeongin cleaned chan up - and felix was on immediate snuggle duty. as the others finished their tasks, they joined, one by one, until the bed was a pile of the people chan treasured most.

in the end, it was easier than he’d thought, falling asleep surrounded by love.

——

a very quick reader survey (specific to this fic!) to make me smile and celebrate hyunjin <3

——

feel free to send more asks! / rules

[ficclings]

Y/N - Reindeer Hybrid

Yoongi - Amur Leopard Hybrid.

A/N: I got super carried away with this and it was supposed to be up for Christmas but my brain shut down for a bit and it missed my own deadline. I haven’t proofread this but I wanted to get it out there. Again it’s a bulletfic as I’m terrified to write proper full fanfictions for KPop but I hope that you all enjoy it anyways. Please like or comment if you would...be...so kind to...

Y/N always had a small aversion to Christmas.

This wasn’t because she despised the day or anything, it was how she was teased relentlessly because she was a Reindeer Hybrid.

She thankfully didn’t have giant antlers like the actual Reindeer; she could hide them with a hat whenever the season arrived.

She could handle herself with the comments but it was always appreciated when her best friend Hoseok stood up for her; his strong Stallion aura greatly intimidating when he needed it to be.

She often stayed at home during winter and worked on her computer, trying to look as if she was at all interested in what her colleagues were saying to her via their small little video chat.

Staying at home wasn’t exactly the most exciting thing in the world but she did enjoy a couple of things.

She could go do things in her home like taking a break often and having a small nap whenever she started to get a headache from working too hard. 

Also, she got to listen to her neighbour.

Her neighbour was an amazing rapper and even though a lot of people would assume she liked musicals, she actually enjoyed rap and heavy metal the most; dabbling in a love for all Japanese music.

 He had the deepest voice she’d ever heard when it came to rap and sometimes he spoke so fast that it took her a moment to comprehend just what the hell had happened.

Y/N always wanted to sound an applause afterward but knew it would most likely be a little weird for him to suddenly hear the squeals of a mostly shut in Reindeer Hybrid.

He always practiced right as the afternoon started for a couple of hours and then she would hear nothing from him again until the next day at the same time.

Unknowingly, he became apart of her routine.

It was like having small daily concerts just for her and as each day passed she found herself gaining a little crush despite most of her knowledge of him came from listening to him through her bedroom wall and one small shared glance they had had with one another when she had just come back from gathering supplies for her Instax Camera.

He was about the same height as her with gorgeous fluffy black hair; bucket hat covering any indication on whether or not he was a Hybrid.

Dressed in all black with only one red tie to add colour, he looked like an absoloute dream to Y/N and she nearly walked right into her front door when she finally got a look at his eyes.

Wonderful dark eyes that held such sleepiness in them; something she found rather endearing.

The moment quickly ended though when she felt her face completely burn up and she hurried into the apartment, leaning against her closed door with a loud gasp of air as she tried to calm down her small panic.

He was there again.

Right by her wall, where she worked, rapping like he was born to do it and her hands immediately stopped typing.

She clambered over her bed and pressed her ear to the wall, smiling and her small tail tingled with excitement.

He added music?!

She clenched her fists tightly with such utter happiness; her mouth opening and before she knew it, she let out a great big “You’re so cool!”.

Y/N froze with wide eyes as the music stopped suddenly and the silence began to pound in her ears; fingers twitching and she curled up away from the wall.

“Hello?”

Oh no, he’s talking to her.

His voice is so close to the wall that she couldn’t even pretend he wasn’t talking to her.

Y/N couldn’t bring herself to speak and she began to nervously pull at her right antler.

Then a knock at her front door just about made her heart drop to her feet.

“Fuck,” 

Why did this situation have to arise? She’s so bloody awkward with social interactions!

“I know you’re in there Reindeer,” 

Oh that made her shiver for some reason and her tail twitched as she managed to get herself to move off her butt and open the door; eyes glued to the floor with red decorating her skin and if he could see that, he never mentioned it.

“Have you been listening to me?” 

She just nodded like one of those stupid bird desk toys.

“Sorry,” 

Brilliant response.

Stunningly eloquent 

“What did you think?”

That one question allowed for a friendship to blossom between the two of you.

His name was Min Yoongi and he was a very lazy Amur Leopard Hybrid.

But a very handsome one.

One that made Y/N want to throw up in nervousness whenever they hung out, which was practically everyday despite her having to work whilst he lazed on her sofa and played on her Playstation.

It was one of those blinding crushes where if Y/N were in a cartoon a pink mist would be surrounding her and hearts and butterflies would dance around her face.

It really didn’t help that winter was also when her Reindeer side would go a bit loopy with hormones and would make her act like, just such a moron around Yoongi.

He had no idea.

He was very clueless when it came to women’s inner turmoil let alone a female hyrbid’s inner turmoil.

Y/N was a woman that he was interested in knowing the inner turmoil of though; she was just...special to him for some reason.

He could blame it on the fact that she was a Doe and very skittish and it brought out his protective side.

Something that made Y/N feel fuzzy.

It was also a bit of a problem when both Yoongi and Hoseok were standing up for you at the same time because they were both very Alpha but Hoseok would always calm down quickly and just nudged Yoongi playfully on the shoulder.

Hoseok loved Yoongi too, it was nice to have a brother to help him out with guy things; something that always made Y/N laugh.

Anyways.

Yoongi had discovered a lot about Y/N when it came to himself.

She liked his ears.

Like a lot.

It was annoying at the beginning because he wasn’t used to it and they kept flicking around as it tickled to no end.

Now he just sat there most days as she ran her forefinger and thumb around on his soft fur.

It made him feel slightly warm under the collar now.

It wasn’t his fault.

You’re just so fucking cute with everything you do.

Even your grumpiness towards Christmas was adorable to him.

The pride he feels when you give him an applause after he practices was the best feeling in the world...only second to the ears.

Your eyes get so big as you stare at him and he almost always falters in his rapping whenever he catches your gaze, red flashing against his pale skin.

“When you get famous you have to invite me on tour!” 

Oh his heart aches.

Oh look at your little hands grasping his arm in graceful giddiness.

Oh your antlers are so fucking cute and oh god look at your little tail.

He wants to tug on your tail.

Not entirely sure why.

But he does know that the thought sends him to the shower every night.

Uh-oh you’re talking to him and he hasn’t been listening.

Totally not imagining things a friend should never imagine.

“Yoo?” 

OH SHE CALLED HIM YOO.

He was pretty sure he was malfunctioning because there was a very concerned expression on your lovely face.

“W-what?” his canines bit harshly down on his bottom lip as he stuttered.

“You alright?” 

Y/N’s hands were tugging on the fabric of his shirt as she tried to look at his face more.

“You’re so red,” she giggled quietly feeling quite drunk on nothing but her own Hybrid side.

Yoongi’s breath got stuck in his throat when the wave of your hormones suddenly slapped him across the face.

He really wished you were sitting directly next to him in your comfy clothes.

You looked so soft in them that he just wanted to gather you up in his arms and rub all over your scent gland.

“I’m good, Reindeer,” he practically purred out getting a scent of mints and chestnuts, setting his skin on fire.

Neither of you have any clue as to who actually made the first move but Y/N found herself laying on top of Yoongi on the sofa, kissing him with the most amount of passion she’d ever felt.

Soon finding her hands gripping the back of the sofa as Yoongi helped her ride him, his face first pressed against her collarbone; hot breath panting against her causing goosebumps before he buried his face in her neck as he continued to scent her heavily.

Your little cries of “oh Yoo,” made his brain feel as if it were melting into a puddle of heaven.

His large hands shyly cupping your backside before finally, finally getting the pleasure of tugging your tail causing a delightful and horrifically erotic squeal to leave your swollen lips.

Both of them consenting before they took the plunge and bit into each other gland as their release rushed over them; fingers causing cuts into each other’s skin as they shook.

After you two had become a mated couple (with the approval of one Hoseok of course), Yoongi had made it his mission to get you at least a little interested in the Christmas Spirit of things.

And boy did he.

His plan would only come into effect on the actual day.

And with his arms wrapped tightly around you on Christmas morning (both of you walking around practically glued to each other after heavy love making the night before) he led you towards the bathroom where he’d hidden his present.

“Merry Christmas, Reindeer,” he bit flirtatiously on your earlobe before opening the door.

A sharp bark sounded around before it was followed by loud squeals from you, hands picking up the small brown dog and snuggling into it’s warm, warm body.

“Oh he’s lovely, oh Yoongi,” cuddling into the Leopards side, he purred in content.

“Holly,”

He looked down at you, eyebrow raised.

“It’s Christmas,” you stated with a determined expression

“His name is Holly,” 

[vvanini]

whats your favorite obscure hc about each of the losers?

Fucking perfect thank you

1- Mike he reads books or articles like “how to understand woman”, “why women like jerks”, not because he wants to woo woman or is a nice guy or anything but just because he thinks it’s interesting

I don’t think he’d date anyone

Gives great dating advice tho

Reads manga Likes Junji Ito

“The manga/book was better” kind of guy

I don’t know why but I feel like he’d be this ENTP-ish dude who likes to gather information about a lot of useless things and likes to debate He likes film and game theories Watches MatPat for sure

Also he likes The Walking Dead and… zombies in general

Also I’m sorry but he likes Quentin Tarantino and Wes Anderson

He likes grindhouse movies and appreciates the gory details but is chill about it Likes cinematography in general

Watches video essays about movies

2- Richie

Unlike Mike, Richie isn’t chill about gory details and whenever someone gags while watching a movie he goes “You think that’s disgusting??? Lmaoooo that’s nothing.”

He’d be the type of guy who brags about being immune to disturbing shit

Google searches include “top ten disturbing movies of all time” “scariest movies ever” “movies worse than a serbian film”

Still likes pink guy and thinks Joji is a genius

Unironically loves the song “I Love Sex” by Pink Guy and listens to it at least once everyday

Uses Discord a lot

Always starts studying on the last day

I think he’d like history

Not like Mike tho, he just likes textbook history and world wars etc

Plays Hearts of Iron and League of Legends

Also :) he likes to code

he is a Linux >>>>>>>>>> Windows kinda guy

Likes breaking bad

And Rick and Morty

Understands politics really well

His music taste is… anime opening songs

Evangelion especially

Likes science fiction books

Pretends to be a flat-earther/conservative/anti-vax for the meme

3- Ben

LIKES BACKSTREET BOYS

and boy bands in general

he is old school and still carries an mp3 around

Doesn’t use spotify, he illegally downloads songs like a champ :D

Likes story rich games

Especially RPG’s. He really likes Planescape Torment and Baldur’s Gate

Kinda lame about women, like he hears Jordan Peterson say something like “the eternal image of the divine feminine” or some shit like that and he goes “wow poetic. agreed”

Doesn’t read “How to woo women” books like Mike but thinks about it a lot that’s for sure

Likes Audrey Hepburn

And Steinbeck

Saves different versions of the same song to his mp3. “The Less I Know The Better but you’re crying in a bathroom” “The Less I Know The Better Slowed & Reverb Listen With Headphones” “The Less I Know The Better Nightcore”

Shares playlists with Eddie

ALWAYS. ALWAYS waits for the person who’s tying their shoes

He notices if someone is walking behind the group alone and walks back to accompany them

If no one laughs at your joke, he does

Bleached his hair once and regretted it immediately Writes poetry in his free time and makes Stan proofread it

Into psychology

Hands always in pockets

Probably owned lots of lego sets as a kid

People go to him for dating advice because he is seen as this “romantic guy”, I mean he is but he gives terrible dating advice

4-Stan

He likes geography

Literally knows all the flags in the world and all the capitals

Blindfold him and give him a country name, he can show you exactly where it is on the map

Also he plays those google earth games where you get a random location and try to find out which country you’re in/ or try to find the nearest airport

Also I feel like he’d like planes a lot

Idk he just likes things that fly lol. Birds, planes etc.

Likes to read classics

LOVES H. P. Lovecraft

carries little poetry books with him everywhere and reads them he’s so cute

Dark academia is his aesthetic

Can play the piano

Likes to read Ben’s poetry :D

Dark humor

His ringtone is Le Festin :)

Has an instagram account but never posts, just watches people’s stories

Very photogenic tho.

He’s a man of culture. He likes visiting aquariums and museums

Hates zoos tho, thinks it’s evil to cage animals

Also I don’t know how to explain it but… He just likes to decorate his place? Like to the clubhouse he’ll bring stuff he likes and just quietly claims a corner as his own and make it as comfortable as he can

Has...beautiful hands

you know how some people cut the cothing labels because it irritates the back of their neck? Stan does that with everything he buys

5- Eddie

Likes Backstreet Boys because of Ben

Replies to texts immediately. Communication and social interaction gives him serotonin

I have no idea why but I feel like he’d have an obsession with Tekken and his favourite character is Ling Xiayou

Big fan of classic playstation games. Loves Spyro, Crash Bandicoot and Ratchet and Clank

He likes wearing long sleeves under t shirts

Listens to emo music, stares out the window and imagines scenarios matching the song he’s listening to

He considers MCR to be emo btw. Loves G note memes

Likes astrology

Can’t watch horror movies, and gets teased by Richie about it

However he likes media that is presented as funky/funny/happy but is actually depressing/disturbing

He likes courtroom dramas

Wears sunglasses indoors for no reason

Probably likes fallout and metro games

Has a collection of finger skateboards

#weirdcore #oddcore #nostalgia #grunge

buys and wears random college sweatshirts

Hates and loves study groups, hates it in the sense that he can’t focus on anything and just wants to hang out and talk, loves it in the sense that he CAN hang out with his friends and talk

Romanticizes everything

6- Bill

Has lots of taurus energy and is sleepy all the time

Has major Leonardo DiCaprio in The Basketball Diaries vibes

Dresses effortlessly

And likes basketball lol.

He just has… boy energy. If that makes sense. Boy next door

Likes to draw his friends

posts his drawings on Instagram

Has lots of OC’s but doesn’t know they’re called OC’s, just refers to them as “this character I created”

He likes being praised a lot ngl

His taste in memes is very similar to Richie’s

You know how they put a random word on top of a random image and it doesn’t make sense at all. He laughs at things like that. Like Richie sends him something like this:

ME WHEN I WHEN

[image of monkey]

BOTTOM TEXT

and he thinks it’s funny and loses his shit im sorry

Like someone sends a picture of Keanu Reeves to the groupchat and texts “g” and he thinks it’s funny???? He sees a picture of a cow in the backrooms and starts choking

He memorized every line in Boneless Pizza and can quote it wihtout stuttering. Like he would be sitting alone talking to himself saying shit like “ya pizza. Watchu want. 2 liter machine broke we got one liter tho. fuck you mean B.”

Never answers calls? Doesn’t like talking on the phone. He just has “Don’t fucking call me when you can text!!” energy

phone is always on silent mode

doesn’t do anything but attracts people anyway

7- Bev

Likes musicals

Theatre kid

Chews gum a lot

And swallows them :(

Likes cottagecore

Buys notebooks with cute covers but can never fill them so she just gives them to bill who turns them into sketchbooks

I think she’d give advice or reaussure people in a way that sounds kinda rude but isn’t really? Like she tells it like it is. Blunt

Likes Avatar The Last Airbender

Sense of humor is:

[Picutre of the fox from Zootopia]

why is he hot help 😭😭😭

wears baggy clothing + long skirts

[piratewithvigor]

My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool 

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously. 

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged. 

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

Ateez: Their Little Sister Is A Popular Idol

Kim Hongjoong:

Hongjoong and you debuted roughly around the same time, and fans lived for your sibling interactions because they were just outright hilarious. You would always end up yelling at each other or having cute little banters.

One day, you were both invited on a special sibling episode of Weekly Idol with other idols, such as Jessica and Krystal, Izone's Chaeyeon and Itzy's Chaeryeong, Oneus' Xion and Onewe's Dongmyeong and Ex Boyfriend's Youngmin and Kwangmin. It was filled with competitions and Hongjoong and you just seemed to struggle to work together. It was especially hilarious when you two played the 'Shout In Silence' game.

"Knock Out!!" You shouted once you saw the word, which was coincidentally your debut song.

"Huh?!" Hongjoong couldn't really understood what your lips formed.

"Knock Out!" You repeated, louder this time.

"Blocked cow?!" He asked, unsure of his answer.

"Stop messing around Kim Hongjoong! Think! My debut song! Knock Out!" You were getting desperate.

"Wait what!" Hongjoong asked.

"My debut song!!!"

But Hongjoong stayed silent, his brain trying to think.

"Didn't you watch it?! Knock Out!!!" You hollered even louder.

"Jumped Out?!" He tried answering.

"Kim Hongjoong I will knock you out if you don't get it!!! Knock Out! Knock Out! Ugh! Stupid!" Your voice was hurting at this point.

"Hey!!! I understood 'stupid'!!! I'm older than you!" He warned you.

Yeah, you had the entire set laughing.

Park Seonghwa:

As your older brother, Seonghwa was extremely protective of you growing up and that didn't change even after you debuted. In fact, his desire to protect you intensified. You often complained about it, hating how he was always fussing over you, reminding you to eat healthy and annoying you at times.

Seonghwa lived for it though. His members were even surprised by how soft he turned for you only. And of course fans thought you two were so adorable. Atinys often liked to tease him about it, often asking him about what he'd do when you started dating. That always seemed to annoy him.

"She's not allowed to date until I'm dead." Was his response every time.

Being Seonghwa's sister, of course you were beautiful, and a lot of idols had their eyes set on dating you. But of course, Seonghwa was always there to cockblock them. Even on tv, he had no chill when telling them to back off.

"Seonghwa have you heard the news?" The tv host asked.

"What news?" He asked.

"Well, with your sister acting in the new web drama, there's rumors going around that she's dating her co-star."

Seonghwa's eye twitched at that, and the other members started laughing.

"I don't think he likes that idea." Yunho chuckled.

"Any words about the situation or to her co-star?" The host asked.

Seonghwa looked to the camera for a few seconds before holding his microphone up.

"Over my dead body." He responded causing the members to go into chaotic mode over his response.

Jeong Yunho:

Yunho was the most supportive brother and he often said he was your biggest fan. Any chance he got, he'd promote you and your group, and was always dancing around to your songs. He'd even post dance covers of them, just to show his support. Every interaction you had, whether at music shows, ISAC or variety shows, he was your personal cheerleader.

He was also extremely clingy towards you, often hugging you, tangling his long limbs over your tiny body.

"Let go Yunho! You're squishing me!" You often told him.

"No! Let me love you!" Your protests would only encourage him to squish you even tighter.

Of course, the dancing genes ran strong in your family. Fans often praised your dancing abilities and were often wondering if you two would ever collaborate together to come up with a choreography. That's exactly what they asked Yunho one day when he was reacting to your comeback music video.

"Wow! As usual, Y/N slays the dance. She's getting better than she already was."

He looked at his phone, reading the fan's comments and landed on a particular question everyone was wondering.

"Would we ever create a dance together? Hmmm."

He thought about it for a moment.

"Honestly, I'd love to do it. What do you say baby sis? Wanna help your Oppa create a choreography? Just us two?"

He snickered when he thought about what you'd say when you saw his VLive.

"She's probably going to say no, tell me I'm annoying and to get lost. She has such a temper........"

He paused before smirking.

"You know what they say. Tiny creatures are more feisty cause their tiny bodies can't hold a lot of rage."

"She's going to kill you when she finds out you said that." Yeosang said from behind the camera.

"Probably. She hates being called tiny." Yunho agreed.

Kang Yeosang:

Although Yeosang was super proud of you for debuting, he kept the fact you two were siblings a secret for a long time and honestly you liked it that way too. You were both introverts and preferred to lay low.

Fans of your groups often compared you two, saying how similar you looked, how you were both the savage ones of your groups, even your little habits and love for chicken was extremely similar. Of course, both of you saw their posts and videos comparing you two, and you both cringed when some thought you'd be cute together. That's when you two stepped in and clarified you were siblings. Now it was fan's turn to be shook at the revelation.

And that became the topic when your groups were invited on a variety show. At one point, Ateez was complaining how Yeosang roasts them so much that they're scared of him and can't ever say anything back. You burst out laughing at that.

"He may be my older brother, but I'm not scared of his sharp tongue." You bravely admitted.

That's when the hosts suggested you expose something about your brother, like he did to his members on Weekly Idol. All of Ateez were super excited about the suggestion.

"Try your best. I'm not scared." Yeosang said confidently, but you knew deep down he was nervous about what you would say.

You couldn't help the smirk on your face as you thought about how to embarrass him.

"So my Oppa here, in front of cameras and with his members, likes to be cold and aloof, hating aegyo and skinship......not wanting Seonghwa or Wooyoung to baby him.......but it's a lie."

Everyone gasped at that.

"Cause at home, our parents are always babying him and he basks in their affection. He's always doing aegyo for them too. Atinys don't be fooled. Kang Yeosang is a literal baby."

Everyone started laughing at that, San and Wooyoung standing up and exclaiming that he was such liar and fake.

For once, Yeosang was so flustered at getting exposed, by none other than his little sister. He was speechless.

"Finally! The great Kang Yeosang had a taste of his own medicine!" Mingi exclaimed, having been Yeosang's constant victim.

No one had the power to make Yeosang scared like you did.

Choi San:

Your number 1 hype man, your caring brother, your part time manager, your personal photographer, and your cuddle bug, there's nothing Choi San wouldn't turn himself into for you. Would legit run a fan blog dedicated to you if he could. Is always praising you and saying the sweetest things about you.

Tries to get you to show off more of your skills and talents. You're shy and somewhat quiet, so people tend to look more at the other members, that's why San is always promoting you and encouraging you to not be afraid to show your true colors.

If you two are in public together, he's always holding your hand or holding you close. Yeah, definitely wants pics of you two to circulate the internet. Spoils you to no end. And he enjoys having you spend time with the other members. They adore you as well.

"Isn't she the cutest? The most adorable thing you've ever seen?" He gives you endless aegyo constantly.

"Did you just call me a thing?" You raised an eyebrow at him.

But you can't stay mad at him, not with that sad pout.

That being said, sometimes you do feel embarrassing by him. You're more reserved and somewhat conservative and so used to seeing cute San, that whenever he turns into demon San you're covering your face or screaming loudly.

"Aaahhh! What the heck San!!! What was that? Oh my god!" You screeched one day when you were reacting to one of his fancams.

"What happened to my older brother?! The one that carries Shiber around everywhere?! What have you done to him?!"

You grabbed your bottle of water dramatically and pretended to throw some at the screen.

"Be gone unclean spirit! Off with you!"

That's the one thing you two have in common: you're both super dramatic and so extra over the smallest of things.

Song Mingi:

He's the older one? Really? That's what everyone was thinking when you confirmed you were siblings. It's not that you looked older or him younger, no. It was your personality. You were extremely mature for your age and were often captured taking care of Mingi or scolding him. Naturally, people thought you were the older one.

Mingi honestly didn't mind. He often joked that he was indeed the baby and you were the older one. Every time you got asked why you babied him, it was the same thing.

"Have you seen him? He'd be dead if it wasn't for me. I'm the reason he's alive."

Mingi actually didn't mind you saying those things.

"That's how she shows her love. She knows she enjoys my company."

It was extremely hilarious for fans to see you guys spend time together. You two once did a VLive collaboration and it became a trending topic for days because it was extremely chaotic and funny.

"Mingi! I told you to flip the eggs!" You shouted at him.

"I tried! But it was stuck!" He tried to excuse himself.

"You're just a scaredy cat! Afraid of getting burnt!" You told him as you turned off the stove.

You immediately grabbed a kitchen towel and started fanning it over the smoke that accumulated in the kitchen.

"God! Mingi I know for a fact you have brain cells.....so fucking use them!"

Mingi gasped at your words.

"Y/N! There's a camera!" He reminded you.

You went wide eyed and panicked. Mingi began laughing at your reaction.

"Oh my god! You cussed live in front of fans!"

Mingi was cracking up so hard at what happened. You were so embarrassed by your mistake. You banged your head on the counter.

"Kill me now." You groaned.

Mingi came up behind you and hugged you.

"Hey don't worry little sis. At least now they know not to mess with you."

Finally, Mingi showed that he was indeed your older brother who was always there to comfort you when you needed it.

Jung Wooyoung:

"You're Ateez' Wooyoung's younger sibling right? What's he like as your brother?"

You often got asked that question and it was always accompanied by you sighing.

"Honestly.....he's a pain. I love him, but he's too much."

Yes Wooyoung loved you as well, but he was super annoying and his past time was teasing you to no end. Even if you threatened to smack him, which you did, or threatened to tell your parents, he'd still keep going.

"And here we see our tiny main vocalist getting ready, and like most females, she's going to take an hour on just her hair then spend 45 minutes on foundation, then-"

"Moooom! Wooyoung is narrating my life again!" You interrupted his narration.

"Snitch! Don't you know that snitches get stitches?" Wooyoung exclaimed, pushing the camera he was holding closer to your face.

"Bitches get stitches too.....Bitch!" You glared at him.

"Oooh! You! I should upload this to the internet and let all your fans know their sweet honey vocalist cusses like a sailor." Wooyoung threatened you.

"Do it no balls! Just remember who taught me those words in the first place." You smirked at him.

"......Shit! Why'd you have to inherit my blackmail skills?" Wooyoung said as he finally stopped recording.

Wooyoung was always reacting to your content though, often making fun of you, but he wasn't mean all the time. He often complimented you on your singing abilities. He was always saying you had the voice of an angel. And if there was something he was extremely vocal about was about any hate comments you got. He was quick and eager to call haters out.

"Dying dolphin? Who you calling dying dolphin? Have you even heard a dolphin dying? This is what it sounds like."

Suddenly Wooyoung began screeching at the top of his lungs, startling the member in the next room.

"What the hell are you doing on your VLive Jung Wooyoung?!" Seonghwa called out.

"I'm showing some bastards the difference between a dying dolphin and an angel singing so they can stop saying bullshit!"

Choi Jongho:

Jongho hates people acting cute, doesn't react to his Hyungs doing aegyo, and is never soft with anyone.....except you, his little sister. It was extremely surprising, even for the members of Ateez. You were the complete opposite of Jongho: you were tiny, cute, adorable, full of aegyo and were not afraid to show it off any chance you got. Loona's Chuu and Lovelyz' Kei had nothing on you in cuteness.

It never failed to amaze people how he smiled that bright gummy smile he had every time you did aegyo for him. The first time you did it was during an episode of Idol Room. It was a game of trying to get Jongho to smile, laugh, react to anything and all of the Ateez members failed. Then you came up with your pigtails and bright smile.

"Oppa! Why so angry? Can't you smile for me?"

The whole room burst into screaming and groaning when Jongho immediately smiled for you and patted your head.

"What the heck!" "That's impossible! He hates aegyo!" "This is rigged! That's sibling privilege!" "What the hell did I embarrass myself for?!"

Anytime anyone mentioned you, he'd immediately light up. He was so soft for you.

"Isn't my sister the cutest?"

Don't push him though. He's also very overprotective of you. Anytime he sees an idol staring at you too much, he flexes his muscles. Anytime the members said you looked cute or pretty, he'd warn them he'd split them like apples if they got too close.

Jongho nearly had a heart attack when he was watching your group's comeback with the other members. And it was because your group suddenly changed your cute concept for a more mature and sexy concept. He was flipping tables, literally.

"What did they do to my little sister?! What happened to her space buns and oversized sweaters?! Why is she wearing that short skirt?! Why are you guys staring?! Stop looking at the screen!!"

The others were cracking up at him as he tried to cover the screen with his body.

Gifs not mine, credit goes to their respective owners.

[mellometal]

Hi, everyone.

I have something extremely important to talk about that is NOT fandom related. I really do hope this can reach everyone on here, especially since it's still Autism Acceptance Month.

A few quick questions for anyone who happens to see this before I dive right into this: Have you ever heard of Dhar Mann? If so, have you ever seen his videos? What do you think about them?

If you don't know who Dhar Mann is, he's a content creator whose main platforms are Instagram and YouTube. He makes these videos about various scenarios from a couple on the brink of divorce, to kids bullying one of their peers, even about Autism Spectrum Disorder. All of his videos have some kind of message at the end that really drives the point home. One of his most recent videos is about ASD, which is what I'm going to discuss today.

Personally, I think some of his videos are interesting, despite the concepts being reused and recycled over and over; however, how I feel about the video he made about ASD is the complete opposite. I'll summarize the video he made so you don't have to watch it. (If you really want to watch it to see exactly what I'm talking about, I'm not gonna stop you. Do what you need to do in order to form your own opinion.)

The video Dhar Mann made about ASD is about this boy who excludes his autistic brother from participating in activities with his friends at school. The boy bullies his autistic brother and does pretty much everything to make his brother's life Hell, even going as far as to pretend that he doesn't know his own brother. The boy "instantly regrets his decision" when their mom is called into the school to discipline her son for bullying his autistic brother. What his mother says is what REALLY upsets me. The message of this video in particular is this, WORD FOR FUCKING WORD. I wish I was kidding. But here's the message below:

How the video concludes is the boy reluctantly includes his autistic brother in every single activity, the boy sees his brother's potential, and they live happily ever after. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.

As an autistic woman who works with disabled people for a living, that message Dhar Mann put in this video specifically is not only extremely ableist, but is also spreading misinformation about ASD.

News flash to all the people who still spread misinformation about ASD: Not every single autistic person is a little white boy in elementary school, nor is every single autistic person a young white man who's a Super Genius™️. (I could go on all day long about how the media stereotypes autistic characters and autistic people in general, but that's a whole other topic.) No autistic person is the same, meaning we all fall on the spectrum in different places and all that jazz. There's no "look" to autistic people either because no autistic person looks the same.

Autistic women exist.

Autistic girls exist.

Autistic nonbinary people exist.

Autistic BIPOC and AAPI exist.

Autistic people who are completely nonverbal exist.

Autistic people who are completely verbal exist.

Autistic people who are in the middle of being nonverbal and verbal exist.

Autistic people who require minimal to no support exist.

Autistic people who require moderate support exist.

Autistic people who require full support exist.

Autistic LGBT people exist. (Reason why I bring this one up is because the media almost always shows cishet autistic men and I don't see autistic LGBT representation very often, if ever.)

Autism isn't something you can "catch". People have this same mentality about ADHD and Tourette's Syndrome too, which, by the way, you can't "catch" either.

Autism doesn't "go away" when you reach adolescence or adulthood. Why? BECAUSE AUTISTIC TEENAGERS AND AUTISTIC ADULTS EXIST. Autistic kids grow into autistic teenagers, then into autistic adults.

You can't "cure" it either. Unless you can build a time machine and a device to go back in time to change how a person's brain develops, there is no cure. ABA therapy is a fucking shit show in itself that does more harm than good.

The title of the video is a real squick for me too. It's mostly because I don't particularly enjoy people using person first language (the "boy with autism" part). I've seen many other autistic people on multiple other platforms sharing that same sentiment and preferring identity first language (autistic person). There are also others who prefer using person first language and those who don't have a preference. That's all perfectly valid. Whatever you prefer people using when referring to you, or whatever you refer to yourself as, in this case, is totally valid and I love you. This goes for disabilities in general, not just Autism Spectrum Disorder.

Regarding the message in this video, here's my response to it! A quick heads-up, my response is VERY long and VERY passionate. I was VERY close to making a response video where I tear that video apart AND tear Dhar Mann a new asshole. Unfortunately, it worked me up so much that I was really struggling with what I wanted to say and I had to stop multiple times because I kept stumbling on my words. That's how angry this message made me. I'll try my best to explain whatever parts you have questions about. I put my response in the nicest way I possibly could, despite me seething with rage, wanting to go OFF on him.

(The first part of my response are the first three screenshots, and the second part are the last three screenshots.)

The first part of my response, I did forget to add that the message is offensive and disrespectful to autistic people as a whole. I apologize. My initial comment got way too long. I pretty much covered that when I told him the message is ableist. I wanted to clear that up before anyone asks about it.

The second part of my response is me opening up about my experience with being diagnosed with ASD, formerly known as As//per//ger's Syn//dro//me, at sixteen years old. I also went into how not calling ASD what it truly is (which is a disability) and calling it a "different ability" instead is extremely harmful and is treating being disabled like it's a bad thing.

By the way, saying that a disabled person is disabled isn't a bad thing. I'm disabled. It is what it is. Does it have its challenges? You bet. Does it help me with certain things? Hell yeah. I can really absorb information about my favorite bands, characters, shows, books, etc., and tell you a lot about those things. For example, I can tell you that Su can't ride a bike or read manga and she's okay with that. I can also tell you she can't tie her shoes very well, which is why her boots don't have laces and are slip-on and/or zip-up. But that doesn't mean my struggles are nonexistent or that I never struggle. I do, and it makes my life Hell at times.

The narrative that autism is a bad thing to have, every autistic person is somehow broken and they all need to be "fixed" is also super fucked up and not true. That's the narrative that I received when I was diagnosed by a therapist I had. I'm gonna be real here, I cried when I was first told that I was diagnosed with ASD. I felt like I was broken. I already felt like a total outcast. Being told about my diagnosis made me feel even more broken than I already felt. I was so ashamed of myself, despite me not doing anything wrong whatsoever, that I masked for SEVEN YEARS of my life. I masked for so long that I forgot I was even diagnosed with ASD in the first place. I wasn't taught how to really put my special interests into good use. I kinda had to figure that out on my own. I was pretty much under the assumption that me being interested in anime, cartoons, music, comics, theatre, writing, etc., to the point of obsession, was somehow weird and hurting people around me. You know, despite those things being harmless. Despite me being able to separate those things from other things that are important (like work, for example). Despite my only surviving parent, other family members, and the woman he was dating at the time completely overreacting and not bothering to see exactly what makes these things so special to me.

(By the way, having a disability does not completely make who a person is. There are a lot more things that make who a person is than that.)

It's kinda shocking that I wasn't able to come to terms with my diagnosis until this year. Considering that I masked for so long due to being ashamed of myself, plus being treated like a burden for being disabled, it's probably not very surprising. I initially thought at the time that it was the worst thing to have, as I was already struggling with enough shit back then, but came to realize it's not a bad thing. It doesn't change who I am. But I'm glad I came to terms with it finally nonetheless.

This is getting way too long, so I'm gonna wrap things up here. If you've read this far, thank you so much. I'm sorry this got so long!

If you watched the video, what are your thoughts on it? If this is your first time hearing about Dhar Mann, how do you feel about him? If you're a Dhar Mann fan, did this change your opinion on him in any way? Feel free to sound off in the comments!

Have a great day, everyone!

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Porn With Plot (2) Masterlist

Links Last Checked: November 11th, 2021

part one, part three, part four, part five, part six

After Getting Stood up, Hooking Up. (ao3) - Analphancones

Summary: Dan get's stood up for prom, so teacher Phil takes him it upon himself to show him how awesome prom should be.

Bang Me Like Those Drums - analphancones

Summary: Phil is the drummer of a band, but how will the lead singer, Kevin, feel when he walks in on Phil banging his younger brother Dan as hard as Phil bangs his drums?

Black Nails and Thick Thighs (ao3) - phandomsub

Summary: When Dan grows his nails out to paint them, it sparks a chain-reaction of fantasies in Phil’s head.

darkest little paradise (ao3) - irrationalqueer

Summary: There’s a pattering of rain on the window. The curtains are open but all that’s visible through the window is a patch of dark grey sky, and even that is marred by the wetness on the glass. A subtle woodsy scent filters through the room, the faint smokiness of the burning candle a complement to the gloom outside. It’s almost peaceful.

Don't cry, ~craft~. (ao3) - sinking_wthatship

Summary: The story behind Dan's tweet about his 'wild New Year Eve'.

Aka existential crisis, tooth-rooting fluff, wine & Pokémons.

Fuck The Past (Dan vs Phil vs Daniel) (ao3) - phandomsub

Summary: Daniel and Phil decide to mess around with a book of spells for their new video. It’s all just a good laugh, until they somehow end up transporting 18-year-old Dan from 2009 into 2017. The only logical solution is: threesome.

if you like to do whatever you've been dreaming about (ao3) - resurrectdead

Summary: They do this, though. Play pretend. Dan is just a student and Phil is just a teacher trainee. They’ve never met outside of school. They’ve never grabbed coffees or snuggled up listening to music. They've never bunched up into the janitorial room with their tongues down each others' throats, Phil's hand down Dan's unzipped pants and his glasses fogging up on the tip of his nose, whispering a messy string of “I love you”s into his neck.

Mistaken identity (ao3) - corvinephan

Summary: Phil mistakes Dan for someone else.

Perspective (ao3) - intoapuddle

Summary: Dan has a few tricks that make him look at life from a different perspective, but only a few of them work. Playing around with Phil is one trick that never fails.

Safe, Consensual and Comfortable. (ao3) - NeverBeenAWriter

Summary: Dan is a struggling actor who gets scouted by an adult entertainment company. There's no harm in just going to an interview right? It's not like he'd accept the job.

AKA: A pornstar Phan AU no one asked for ^^;

Talk Like That (ao3) - intoapuddle

Summary: Tenderness has its place. But sometimes, even on an evening that is as quiet and unassuming as this one, Phil wants filthy heat and tension that doesn’t require an afterthought.

The Great Unexpected Daddy Kink! - gorgeousdan

Summary: Dan totally doesn’t have a daddy kink. It’s just that sometimes he reads phanfics and sometimes he turns red when he calls Phil daddy in these fics and sometimes he uses humour to cover up the fact that he finds it totally, ridiculously, hot.

the maestro and his muse (ao3) - Tarredion

Summary: Phil is a professional artist. There are some things he has always wanted to try, and with a motto like Try New Things, it’s understandable that he’ll go through with many of them. Painting on living, breathing, naked human bodies is one of those things.

Unfortunately, he's chosen his good friend, muse, and crush Dan Howell as his subject. What could go wrong?

You push all my buttons down. (I know life would suck without you) (ao3) - sinking_wthatship

Summary: I filled a prompt I stole from @phanfic on tumblr shoutout gal xx

Prompt was : Dan and Phil are together, but they have a fight. They don’t speak (only to argue), and have to film a video together. They act civil and what not but it is obvious that they aren’t as close. After the filming, there is a lot of sexual tension, so Phil kisses Dan and it ends up as angry/make-up sex.

&I included strong PINOF 4 references + 2012!phan because well.

you're pins, I'm needles (ao3) - resurrectdead

Summary:Dan was horny. There was no denying that anymore. But the setting wasn’t what he’d imagined for an awkward moment like this to unravel. It was the first time he was in Phil’s bedroom; the first time he’d met him, actually. And Phil was sat right next to him on the bed, somehow oblivious to his torment, too damn concentrated on an underwater Sonic level on the TV screen in front of them. All the while, Dan had his legs squeezed shut, knees tight against each other with the bulge in his sweatpants throbbing noticeably between his warm thighs.

Or: Dan goes to Phil's house for the first time in 2009 and uh. You know.

You Scared, Baby? (ao3) - phandomsub

Summary: It takes Phil a long time to figure out why Dan insists on watching horror movies, even though they scare him half to death. When he finally does, he comes up with a plan.

[heyheshi]

Her

2.8k words

written and uploaded: September 10 - 11, 2020

🌙 - angst

Please like and reblog! Also please don't post my writings anywhere!

I'm sorry this is a bit late, I was really busy the whole day! Also i feel like this isn't too angsty or this isn't as heartbreaking as i wanted it to be haha probably because I'm too tired right now, it's 3:00 am where I live but i really wanted to write it since this concept has been with me since i first started writing and i feel like i can nail it since me and this guy broke up just this last Saturday lol. But idk i don't think i gave this one a justice but please let me know!!

Also i tweeked some of the details of the whole album release as well as the album/song meaning/interpretation itself.

Btw! I'm planning on writing a second part and hopefully a third part which will have a spin off so tell me if you want me to write it!

Stream the songs in BOLD LETTERS AKA THE WHOLE ALBUM.

Masterlist

_________

You're proud. You're so proud of him, so fucking proud of your best friend - your boyfriend. You don't remember the last time you felt like this - you're anxious, excited, scarred - everything and you felt like you might pass out with every tick of the seconds of the clock.

You look like a crazy person. Sitting at the end of the edge of the couch, your foot tapping rapidly along with your ranging mind. Your natural nails now looks awful from how much you've bitten it for God knows how long. Your hair disheveled together with your now wrinkled clothes.

Harry on the other hand looks calm - too calm for your liking and you wanna scream at him for still looking so good even though you know he's also just as tense as you, maybe even more, but you can't. Not on one of the most special occasions in his life.

Tonight is the release date of his second solo album "Fine Line". You couldn't fathom how much sleepless nights he went through just to produce this - along with the crew and you couldn't be any less prideful. Harry has been so hands on, from the tunes, to the lyrics, to the instrumentals, to the photo shoot for the album cover, and even in the promo of the album.

You know everything he went through just to make it to his success right now. All the hardships, the pain, the tears, the laughter, the love - you've been there every step of the way. You never left him like how he left her.

And on that note, you felt like it's unfair if you get to hear the album first. Yes, you're there throughout the making but you never heard all of it. Harry insisted that you listen to the album after he's done recording it and as much as you'd love to, you politely declined and protested to just hear it along with the rest of the world, to which he agreed to.

There's just this thrill you're looking for, the thrill of having something you've wanted for a long time. The desire. The hunger. The yearn of hearing it for the first time after waiting for endless nights.

It's like being away from Harry and waiting in your room, longing for his touch, his kiss, his voice, and his presence and when he comes back - all of those explodes within you and it leaves you with the magical feeling that you couldn't feel anywhere else.

The process has been painful for you. He recorded in a different country and you had to do long distance again. At first it was fine but as the weeks passed, it got harder and harder for the both of you - being away from each other - so H insisted that you flew across the world to join him.

You didn't hesitate to say yes but even then, Harry always stays at the studio for days and comes home only for him to leave again but you understand. It's his work and you knew what you signed up for when you became his girlfriend and you vowed to yourself to fight and do everything you can for this relationship.

He was great though, took you on dates when he can and tried to spend as much time as he can with you because he knows that after the release of his album, the interviews will surely be nonstop and he'll be away again to plan for his promotional tour. You'd wake up with cute notes more often than not, flowers were also delivered almost everyday to where you two are staying.

But you felt it. You felt that he was slowly slipping away. You know it deep inside but you pretended not to notice. Too afraid of being kicked out of this world you created for the two of you. But perhaps he never really slipped away because maybe he was never truly yours in the first place.

Harry is so excited for you to hear his second baby so when the alarm clock went off, he quickly refreshed the website and played the first song. Golden.

You love the vibe. It's only the first song but you know that it'll be added to your personal playlist to jam with. He was looking at you the whole time, gauging your reaction but stayed quiet. The living room's filled with his voice and the lively instrumentals until the outro.

Maybe you're wrong. Maybe he wasn't slipping away and maybe he was truly yours before - and until now. Maybe it was just your mind playing tricks on you. Maybe, just maybe. A fifty - fifty chance for everything you don't know but you didn't let it eat you.

Next, the Watermelon Sugar. It is the song you knew will be a single and will have a music video. Just because you haven't heard the album before doesn't mean it stops Harry from sharing details here and there to you.

Your thoughts ran wild with thought of what the music video could be. The song is everything and you couldn't stop humming along with it and based on your reactions, he knew that he made the right choice of picking it as a single.

He's still yours. He loves you and he never slipped through your fingertips. You're most likely forcing yourself to believe it and so far it's working but you know you have to talk to Harry about the two of you sooner or later because it's not healthy for your health at all - the uncertainty that's currently laying in your persona.

The next two songs - Adore You and Lights Up - are the one's you've already heard before since those are the two that have a music video that came out before his album. Adore You is your favorite song. You're maybe being biased but the song just gives you great energy and you absolutely adored the concept of the video, as well as Harry's looks.

But the Lights Up hits different. You were there when they shoot it but you were sick so you didn't get go watch how they did it and you remembered watching the video for the first time and getting really really bothered by it that Harry had to take you to the nearest ice cream shop to calm you down. Your boyfriend looked so hot in it.

You're enjoying the album so far and you're almost too sure that nothing is wrong - or so you thought. It's silly but for some reason you felt like your relationship lies on this album.

Cherry came next, before, you thought it's gonna be upbeat like the Watermelon Sugar and Kiwi but oh boy, it's the opposite. It's not only the tune. It's the song itself that made you wanna walk out of the room.

You love songs like this, the type of songs that cuts deep within your soul. The type of song that can make you cry instantly but this is different.

You know the song is about her and if it the lyrics wasn't enough to slap you in the face, the voicemail at the end surely did. But this one hits different. Maybe it's because it shows you that Harry is not entirely yours in your relationship and that something inside him longs wants to have her again and it hurts. It crushes you but you're staying strong because like before, it's not certain - a maybe, there's still a chance and you're clinging into that like your life depends on it.

You couldn't look up. You know Harry is watching you. He tried to hide the outro, he almost clicked the button for the next track but you held your hand as a sign to stop. He couldn't hide it from you. The outro is still ringing in your ears like it's coming to get you. You can't. You just simply can't. Her voice with his giggles made you wonder what's running through his mind when he decided to put the voicemail.

You tried to hold your emotions and waited for the next song to start but it didn't get any better. Falling made your tears fall, finally. And when your boyfriend asked you if you're okay, the only response you told him was that, "you were so good with this it's making me really emotional", and he bought it.

He bought your lie. You don't know if you shall be happy or not. Happy because you wouldn't need to explain yourself further or sad because Harry believed it instantly without even asking if you're really okay for the second time.

The chorus hits different. You're baffled at how much emotion he put in that particular song. It felt so wrong but you couldn't do anything about it. You're sad. You're hurt. You don't know what will happen next. So you did what you do best - pretend that everything is alright.

Your mind was absent through the next two songs - To Be So Lonely and She. You still can't get over from the previous songs and it guilt you that you couldn't appreciate these songs as much as it shall be appreciated. All you know is that if Harry made it, it's fucking incredible.

He did mention to you in a low voice that To Be So Lonely is one of his favorites and oh you fucking wonder why but you didn't say it out loud, you kept quiet and pretended that you're analyzing every second of the song. And when he told you that She could be added to your love-making playlist, you only nodded.

The thought of it being added to your love-making playlist sickens you to the core specially now that you're almost too certain that this one is also about her, though you didn't reprimanded.

You tried to compose yourself along with the next song Sunflower, Vol. 6. You faked being happy just for the sake of this day. Yes, it is a happy and loving song but you couldn't enjoy it without overanalyzing the lyrics and the same goes to the next song Canyon Moon.

Who is the "Sunflower" Harry is referring to? You or her? Who will he be coming home to? Will he come running into your arms or will he seek warm in her presence? You hate to question it and you hate feeling this way but you're far too deep and you just wanted to get this night over.

Treat People with Kindness reminded you of your childhood cartoon theme songs and it eased you out. It also made you smile for the first time since Cherry and you could tell that Harry's relieved. It was the first time you looked up from the carpet and you almost thought that the next song is your saving grace. It's the final song anyway.

And it is. The only problem is that the song is you right now. Fine Line. The chorus kept repeating and it made you question your relationship. Is your relationship a fine line? Will the two of you be alright?

Thank God it's the last song because you couldn't wait to ask Harry something that really bothered you tonight. You need to know for your sake and for the sake of this relationship.

You'll be lying if you said you only shed a tear on the last song. No, you sobbed and Harry tried to console you and asked what's wrong and its now or never.

Harry beat you to speaking first though, he asked you why did you cried and you only told him, "I'm so proud of you and I couldn't stop my tears from flowing and I love you so much.", which is not a lie but not the whole truth either.

He only nodded and kissed your forehead as a way of saying his thanks. You're certain that he can feel that you're tired so he chooses to stay quiet and you know that he's already planning for a day off for the both of you tomorrow so you can properly tell him your thoughts on his album.

You we're about to ask him. Ask him if he still loves her but the tune of his phone ringing made you stop. He silently asked you if it's alright to answer it and you agreed.

The next few minutes was his friends and families calling and congratulating him. You don't wanna be bitter or be a mood disruptor but you just really want to think and be alone right now, after all, you deserved it. You signed Harry that you will go upstairs to take a rest and he whispered "I love you" but you only nodded and started walking to the stairs.

He didn't notice that you didn't say it back. He was too caught up with the people on his screen. His cheerful voice rang throughout the ground floor as he talks to the other person on the other line.

You don't wanna think about it as you lay down on your shared bed but you couldn't stop thinking about how much of a possibility for her to call him to congratulate him for the success of his second album. You couldn't stop thinking of how they might talk about their relationship. You couldn't stop thinking if Harry will ask her to come back if she did call. You couldn't stop thinking.

You took your phone from your beside table to open Twitter. Harry and his album is trending and praises after praises we're posted in different languages but most of those are about them. Harry and her.

You're numb.

It is now clear to you that the whole album is about her. You never asked or wished to have a song written about you but you also never expected him to dedicate the album solely to her, his ex from two years ago. You get it, you really do. The best songs came from the writers' personal experiences but to basically tell the world that he still wants her breaks you into pieces.

There gotta be at least one line about you. You, the one he is with now and not her. You, the one who's loving him now, not her. You, the one who didn't leave him unlike her. It's you and not her.

But no matter how much you repeat it in your mind, you know it's not you. You love Harry and you tried. Tried supporting him through the day much like all the other days but it's so hard when the universe already shot you with the truth.

You're still proud of him, it will never change but you need something. You have to have something to hold on to because right now you're only grasping to this very little hope that might save your relationship. You're proud but hurt and you hate yourself for not being there. None of it is about you. It's about her. Her and him. Her and Harry. Never you and Harry.

He never even warned you that the album is about her, it seems like he wanted to surprise you but you know he's not cruel but maybe you're just trying to defend him from yourself.

Or maybe he didn't thought you'd think this way. After all he doesn't put meanings behind his songs so you couldn't really get any answer from having him explain to you every song.

Your own interpretation's more than enough though. He still wants her. Maybe he did became yours even just for a second but his love for her is eternal and so he slipped away. You couldn't pretend anymore - not now when you're alone and you can show your emotions, so you sobbed.

You cried for you and Harry. You cried for what you thought was something so beautiful and unbreakable. You cried for what would've been a great night for the both of you and last but not the least, you cried for your uncertain tomorrow.

Tomorrow when you wake up, you don't know if Harry still wants you, you don't know if you can fix this, you don't know if you can still be with him.

Now, you realized it. Tomorrow there might be nothing, no world where only the two of you exists because tomorrow might be the end. The thought of that made you cried harder than you already are. It's so unfair. You love him so much but it doesn't seem enough and no matter how many excuses you naïvely say to yourself, you know it couldn't change the fact that it's her and him - it has always been her and him.

You're too tired and just wanted to sleep, hopefully get a clearer view out of all of this when you wake up.

_____