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seresinhangmanjake · 2 months

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Fremen Girl: Part 2

Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Fremen!Reader

Summary: The potential wife of any future Baron must prove herself by surviving in the arena before the current Baron will permit the marriage. In this case, Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen wants a wife, and he might have just found a woman capable of meeting that challenge.

Notes/Warnings (for this part): cursing, lack of fighting technique knowledge, subtle reference to the thought of suicide, Dune inaccuracies and typos.

Words: 1700

Feyd-Rautha Masterlist / Main Masterlist

Part 1 (Here)

Feyd POV

Feyd stands aside in his uncle’s room, one hand clasping the other’s wrist behind his back as the Baron emerges from his bath with a groan, inky liquid streaking down his face.

“Nephew” he begins without glancing in Feyd’s direction, “I hear you’ve found yourself a potential bride.”

Feyd’s lips thin. The Baron has his spies but they are not likely to be the responsible party when it comes to informing the Baron of your presence on Giedi Prime mere hours after arriving. “Rabban?”

“Just as you watch your brother, your brother watches you,” the Baron confirms. “A Fremen woman?”

Feyd takes a moment to consider everything Rabban might know, hoping, at least, that he isn’t aware you were assigned a handful of guards willing to be discrete and your own room rather than a dank cell. The Baron would never allow special treatment of a potential bride and it’s best he remains unaware of Feyd’s plans to keep you nourished and well taken care of.

“She can win,” Feyd says.

“And is that your only reason for wanting this one?”

There are a handful of reasons why he wants you. You’re beautiful, perhaps more so with that split lip; you’re respected, as shown by the outburst of your fellow Fedaykin a day prior; and of most value to Feyd: you aren’t afraid of him. You don’t back down from a challenge, even if that challenge is as trivial as seeing who will be the first to break their stare. You’re the only woman he’s seen who might survive the Trial. There was no chance he was going to let you go.

“If I marry her, she can convince the Fremen to cease their efforts against us,” he tells his uncle, though it is a reason far from the priority of Feyd’s motivations and far from likely. Your people do not surrender so easily. “We can do our work on Arrakis without interference.”

This Baron’s thick fingers stroke the underside of his chubby chin as he contemplates, but Feyd knows it’s a strategic ruse. Baron Vladimir Harkonnen never lets immediate interest show, lest he give up the control he possesses over his nephews who answer to him and him alone. He has not once agreed to a request without having the suspense of being denied hanging in the air.

“Two weeks,” the Baron finally responds. “Enough time to inform all of Giedi Prime of a Marriage Trial.”

Relief washes over Feyd, despite already expecting the agreement from his uncle. The Baron loves to watch the slaughtering of potential brides, and while the opportunity to manage spice production on Arrakis without a fuss is enticing, of equal value is the entertainment of such high stakes resting on the life of one woman—a woman his nephew wants to marry.

Regardless of whether or not you die, the Baron believes he will have a victory. But Feyd is not going to be the fool his brother is, who selects brides on lust alone and sends them into the arena unable to hold a sword above their heads. He’s going to keep you alive. He is going to marry you. And then he’ll deal with the repercussions of prematurely promising a truce that’s unlikely to occur.

—

Reader POV

“Go again.”

“Fuck off,” you spit through your heaves. His last hit to your back shot the air right out of your lungs and it’s all you have not to collapse to the floor of his training room.

“They are not going to fuck off,” he says as he circles you, deft fingers casually flipping his knife at his side.

You hate him for waking you at one in the morning for the seventh day in a row, and that hatred has only grown seeing how he doesn’t break a sweat while you’re thoroughly worn out. It’s humbling if you’re honest, but irritating more than anything. You’ve single-handedly taken down more Harkonnens in one fight than any other Fremen, but it’s become clear that if you met Feyd-Rautha under more hostile circumstances, he would not be a guaranteed kill. For every sparing match you’ve won in your unprepared, sleep-deprived, he's won three.

“They are fighting for their lives, too,” Feyd reminds you. “It’s six-to-one and their only job is to kill you. You have to kill all six.”

“I know,” you groan, peeling your hair from your damp face. “You’ve been saying the same damn thing for a week.”

“Because you don't care enough,” he snaps.

You care, but he takes it to another level. While he doesn't say it outright, you know you’re training to be a source of Harkonnen entertainment; to last in the arena long enough to provide a good show. You’re the equivalent of House Ezharian’s dancing girls on Erif IV but clothed in a short-sleeved shirt and elastic trousers rather than layers of dainty chiffon fabric with gemstone trim.

When you first stepped foot on Giedi Prime, you felt the same as you imagine those women do: that life under the close thumb of another is a life of little hope for freedom, so why fight the inevitable? But Feyd hasn’t given you the choice to stop fighting; stop living. He’s had guards watching you at all hours and anything that could have been used to harm yourself was removed from your room before you even arrived.

It didn't take long to realize your only out of this life would be to die in the arena. But being butchered by Harkonnen prisoners for others’ enjoyment is perhaps the least honorable way to go, and there’s a part of you that would never forgive yourself for letting someone else take the light out of your eyes.

Feyd comes to a stop in front of you. You steel your spine, but before you can step into your fighting stance, he lunches at you. Fucking bastard. Your blade quickly folds in front of your body to block the sharp thrust of his knife, metal clanging against metal. He smirks before slamming his fist into your side, crippling you to your knees, but just as he goes to stab into your chest, you forward-roll out of the trajectory of his weapon. You force yourself to stand and whip around to face him.

He’s on you in a half-second, so damn fast, like a shot of lightning from the sky, but you're swift and he misses you. Unfortunately, you’re more used to fighting on sand than stone, so as you leap away from his swing, you overcalculate the force of your weight and stumble. He takes the opportunity to snatch your wrist in his free hand, and his strength overpowers your attempts to jerk free. He spins you until your back is flush with his chest. One arm wraps around your waist. The other holds the blade’s edge to your throat.

“Not good enough,” he growls in your ear.

He holds you, his breath bleeding down your neck, muddling your brain. You can hear him thinking—Get yourself out of this, Fremen girl. So you inhale the remainder of your might, slam your foot down onto his, and jab your elbow into his ribcage. He grunts as you slip through the span of his reach. You turn and side kick his abdomen, but it’s hardly effective past causing a brief stagger.

“Higher,” he says on the exhale of a heavy breath.

“What?”

“If you’re going for the torso, aim your kick higher,” he tells you, patting at the space between his pecs. “More likely to knock them off balance.”

You roll your eyes. You know how to fight. He knows you know how to fight. It’s why he took such an interest in you. It’s why you were kept alive to participate in the Harkonnens’ little games while the remainder of your group remained on Arrakis.

“I know,” you grumble.

“Then why didn’t you do it?” he asks. When you don’t respond, he shakes his head. “You’re skilled, but you're being sloppy.”

“Because I’m fucking tired,” you say. “And what does it matter when it's not you I’ll be fighting? I’ve killed more than six people at a time. I’ll be fine.”

“You can’t promise that!” he shouts. The rapid change in his attitude makes you take a step back and tighten your grip on the hilt of your weapon. When he sees your knuckles whitening, he sighs and sheathes his knife. “I know the Fremen techniques, and your people never fight alone. Enemies are distracted by multiple targets and you often succeed with the element of surprise, but this time it is you—only you—that they will be after.”

“And you think I can’t handle it.”

“I don’t get to select your opponents, so I need you to be prepared for the worst,” he tells you, moving in close and entering the ring of your personal space. Your breath quickens as your chin lifts to keep his gaze. “I want you to win this, Fremen girl. I want you to live.”

“Why?”

“I just do,” he says.

He does not elaborate. All you hear is your alternating breaths as your eyes flick back and forth between his own. Electricity crackles in the minimal space separating your bodies—not the first time you’ve felt it from him being so close—but you don’t know what to do with it. You don’t know why you don’t hate it like you should.

He, however, seems to enjoy it, and more so each time it catches you off guard. Physically he wants you strong, but mentally he enjoys the vulnerability that he teases out before you can conceal it.

Feyd backs away from you and reaches over his shoulder to grab the collar of his shirt, then he pulls it over his head and tosses it aside, exposing pale skin and ridges of muscles.

For a moment, your lungs refuse oxygen. “What are you doing?”

“It’s warm in here,” he poorly justifies. There's not a single droplet of sweat on him. Then he unsheathes his knife. “Let’s go again.”

---

A/N: should be two more parts after this one. It was originally going to be one long fic, but it got too long, so I just broke it up. Thanks for reading <3

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#feyd rautha #feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha x you #austin butler #feyd rautha fic #dune part 2 #dune

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cravetive · 4 months

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𝔸 𝔽ℝ𝕀𝔼ℕ𝔻 𝕆𝔽 𝔸 𝔽ℝ𝕀𝔼ℕ𝔻 | ℂℍ. 𝟙𝟘

| 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐮𝐧𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫.

|𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞/𝐚𝐮: 𝐄𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬,𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭,𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐮, 𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭.

| 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐗 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

| 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7k

| 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬, 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞, 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬 & 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞 ( 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤), 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐦𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 (𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬), 𝐬𝐞𝐱 ( 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬), 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐮𝐧𝐬 & 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬, 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

| 𝐀/𝐍: 𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐟��𝐞𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫, 𝐢𝐦 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧.

previous chapters

“Will the Jury foreperson please stand?”

The judge’s voice is a mesh of muffles and white noise in Jin’s ears - his mind absent from the courtroom as his client faces his sentencing. Everything seems to move in slow motion around him, the whispers of his client asking anxious questions, only further inducing the headache that presses harshly against his temples.

Jin hasn’t slept in days, each morning blending in with the night, an endless cycle that leaves him spent. he wishes he can say it’s due to this case or any of the other 9 he’s currently handling for that matter but that’s not what has been leaving him wide eyed in his bed at ungodly hours of the night, in fact they haven’t even played a factor.

Today he finds himself representing yet another vile criminal, charged with a crime that has shaken society to its core - the trial televised for the entire world to see. His eyes scurry away from the camera that stands right in front of him, antonizing a certain anxiousness that Jin has never felt in a courtroom before. The stakes are stacked high, his reputation on the line and yet, he can’t bring himself to focus - his heed placed elsewhere.

From the untouched glass of water that sits before him he can see his distorted reflection, the plum hue under his eyes further demonstrating the stress his body is undergoing - his compressed chest unable to feel relief no matter how much he tries to breathe.

would his client feel reassured of his fate if he knew that it wasn’t one of the best lawyers sitting besides him now but instead a ghost?

Jin’s mind wanders through the walls, his eyes scanning the nearest exit and for an instance he feels as though this is his own trial, one in which no one would come to save him - all evidence pointing to his guilty conscience all while the cameras capture every uneasy breath he struggles to take.

As his stare travels back to the Judge - he notes her disapproving expression, it is the look of someone who knows what he has done, oblivious to the fact that Jin is already inside a prison, his own morality caging him inside of a cell that has no key.

He has condemned himself to feelings he can’t control, all because he wanted to be a better man - He’s unable to balance his integrity on the scale of good and bad. his inner darkest fears shaken by the mere phone call of someone he owes his life to, someone he has pledged loyalty to.

The sound of Jungkook’s voice still rings inside his ears, a nauseating reminder of Jin’s betrayal.

When you came to him asking for help he had already foreseen how things would play out, you had unknowingly put him against a wall, a sword pressed to his chest and all he could do was stretch out his hand and aid you in bringing down one of his closest friends.

For the first time he had a choice to stray away from the life of depravity he had chosen, to clear his conscience of all the bad he had done along his career. You were the first person he had ever helped who he truly felt was innocent, how could he say no while he saw the despair in your eyes?

So, he decided to defend you without a single beat of hesitation, forgetting his loyalty belonged to someone else.

That late night conversation with Jungkook had left him burdened, bringing out a certain paranoia that perhaps remained dormant inside of him, lured into slumber with each day he met you in that coffee shop where he would convince himself he was being virtous and although, the phone call was short and vague, he had engraved Jungkook’s impatient tone inside his head.

Jin didn’t need clues to conclude what his friend was after, he didn’t need to ask what it was Jungkook needed from him to repay his debt, Jin already knew. Jungkook’s rampage in search of you being all the city could speak of, the destruction he left in his wake landing on Jin’s radar like the morning news.

He never meant to get involved, in fact he had preferred to stay oblivious. How could he choose? you his dearest friend, someone he looked to protect and aid - and then him ... .his childhood friend, the one he always seemed to end up picking up the broken pieces for, no matter how much his hands bled.

Both sides tug at his fealty.

“Has the jury reached a verdict?”

Whilst his client trembles in his chair, Jin feels the pressure of his phone that is kept turned off inside his pocket - the thought of receiving yet another call from Jungkook, beginning to torment him in ways his pride will never allow him to divulge.

“Yes”

He needs to focus, this is important but his mind drifts, searching for ways in which he can justify his decisions - trying to find a way out of the predicament he has placed himself in, in a way only a man like him can.

“We the jury find the defendant not guilty on all counts of murder and assault.”

A hefty sigh leaves Jin’s mouth, his hands clamping together underneath the table as his eyes flutter shut - he had hoped that this relief that washes over him now would be enough to clear his mind of the thoughts that burdened him but reality is, nothing can. He feels his client grip his arm and pull him into a hug - his cheers filling the ears of the abstracted man.

At another time Jin would’ve probably celebrated too, after all was this not a demonstration of his capabilities? Yet, he can’t bring himself to cheer, to celebrate nor to feel triumph. Jin is used to walking out of courtrooms a victorious man but now he is rather conflicted and as he pushes away from the strong embrace his client offers him, he finds his eyes trailing back to the victims family - offering them a silent apology, one that he never tends to offer.

Something has changed inside of him - a shift he can’t understand. Previously, Jin had never bothered to care if his clients were guilty or not, if he was a bad man for even protecting them, perhaps because his clients were only reflections of someone he knew, someone who he has been great at defending.

But Now he feels just as culpable as the man standing next to him, the one who has stabbed his wife to death.

In the past he would’ve defended Jungkook above everything else and walked past a victim like you, a victorious man.

Something has changed.

“The verdict is sustained, The jury is thanked and excused. Court is adjourned.”

The Judge slams her gabble and soon the murmuring and heavy whimpers of the victims family fill Jin’s ears, eating away at his vulnerability. The sound of their agony causes his heart to rumble - the sensation becoming too much to withstand.

His own shame begging to beat him down.

His vision is blurred, unable to concentrate on anything as he stands there motionless

- his intestines turning as he finds the eyes of the man whom he has just freed. Jin has fought like hell to prove without a reasonable doubt that this man has not committed the crime he has been accused of, even if within himself he harbors the truth that only the 2 of them know.

The worst part of it all is that Jin knows he will be back here - perhaps with someone much worse than the man that he has just defended and he can’t help but question if the real reason why he fights so hard in the first place is to prove he himself isn’t like them.

“Thank you Mr. Kim '' his client exclaims with excitement whilst he interlocks his hand with Jin’s in a firm shake. Jin’s stare remains withdrawn - his mouth unable to open and form any words and as he glances down at their knotted hands he pictures blood dripping from them.

His body runs cold, his hand retracting quickly while his blinking eyes inspect the skin there.

He’s losing it.

“How will I ever repay you?” Jin’s eyes snap back to stare at his client, the room beginning to spin around him and he tries to smile, to at least pretend like he shares this man’s joy but he can’t move a muscle and as he goes to speak he hopes his tone wont give away the immediate regret that has settled inside of him.

“I just hope you’ll never need me again.”

But they always do and Jin is more than positive he will reoffend - he will take another life, he will leave another bloody trail and Jin prays to any god that will listen that when that day comes the DA will have enough evidence to put him away.

His client responds with a mocking laugh, his chest heaving at the joke Jin has just made but Jin means it with every morsel of his being, his role as the devil's advocate beginning to eat away at his soul.

Jin can feel all eyes on him as he begins to step out of the courtroom, lowering his head as the cameras flash in his direction - the victory he should be indulging in, feels more like a loss, the way in which he has let his previous wins feed his ego is starting to disgust him. His steps are no longer confident and he fights with the urge to turn around and request the judge to reconsider, he wants nothing more than to beg her to give his client the full weight of the law.

Even if he has to drop to his knees for it.

As he steps out into the empty hall his eager hands reach into his pocket, sliding his phone out and staring at the screen until it turns back to life, his weary eyes scanning the notifications that flood in but he can only see emails from his firm and texts from a girl he met at a bar a few nights ago when he found himself sleepless again

none of them from the man who has taken his appetite away.

He sighs, standing completely still and then the hallway that once had been completely quiet fills with reporters - greedy cameras and microphones waiting for his client to exit the courtroom and all Jin hopes for is for him not to say anything stupid.

For him not to leave another mess for Jin to clean up.

He holds his breath, deciding to take the nearest exit in his wishful attempt to avoid the eye of the media. This time he feels no desire to stand beside his client as he throws out thank you’s and excuses, he can’t digest the idea of reporters asking him questions regarding his morality - of why he chooses to defend the people he does or if he thinks they are guilty.

9 times out of 10 they most likely are.

The cold air ripples through Jin’s suit as he makes a quick exit of the courthouse, his eyes focused on the sun which sets between the tall buildings ahead of him, the city roaring with life. He can hear laughter, traffic, and random conversations from those who pass by. the sounds - the normalcy in everything and he has almost forgotten that time hasn’t stopped, no matter how stagnant he feels.

though, the distraction does not last long as he feels a faint buzz against his chest and he’s swiftly reeled back into his reality - his breaths becoming labored, his eyes darting in every direction. Once he again finds himself succumbing to paranoia.

Jin’s shaky hands slide the phone from the front pocket of his suit and he stares at the unknown number flashing through the screen for a moment - every nerve in his body standing at attention, the lethargy that had clung to his body dissipating into thin air.

For a second he contemplates if he should answer, he wonders if he’s prepared to hear Jungkook’s voice again but even if he isn’t what other option does he have, avoiding the issue would only cause it to grow.

He quickly answers the call and presses the phone to his ear, frantic eyes focusing on the lively city in front of him, attempting to find a random object he can anchor himself to.

“Hello” he answers coldly- trying to conceal the utter worry in his tone.

“Jin” the voice is soft, delicate even and it takes him back to when he was just a college student, sitting across the dining table with a math book in hand, a red pen in the other.

“Y/n” he breathes out, eyes blinking quickly while he registers it’s you on the other line.

“You sound disappointed” you giggle and Jin smiles for a moment, though it does not last.

You are but a reminder of the secret he conceals.

“Uh” Jin chuckles dryly “quite the opposite actually.”

Jin expects to feel at ease, after all you are someone dear to him but he can’t push away the guilt that creeps inside of him while he hears your giggles flow through the line.

In that moment he doesn’t know which voice he would have preferred to hear, yours is supposed to be a breath of fresh air, a cup of cold water to tame the turmoil inside of him. to know you were okay , to know you were safe, to recognize no panic in your voice should be alleviating but the feeling never arrives.

Do you even know who he is? Who he has betrayed for you? Would you still consider him a friend if you were to find out?

“Are you okay?” He asks, a question he isn’t fully prepared to make nor one that he has been ready to hear the answer to.

There's a long pause, a pause that Jin doesn’t particularly like. It causes his chest to compress, for his palms to grow cold.

“Yes, im safe.”

It’s not the answer to the question he has asked but he takes it, because if you are safe it means you are okay, right?

Jin hadn’t spoken to you since your swift escape from the Jeon’s banquet and though he had been worried sick for some time, Jungkook had arrived in almost comical timing to strip away his concern for you, replacing it with the sour reminder of the debt he owed.

He wants to pretend that hearing from you is a good thing but your voice, although quiet and careful, stabs away at his heart harshly. So he fakes a heavy sigh, feigning a relief that isn’t there.

“Well, I'm glad,” Jin mutters.

“Are you okay?”

Jin can’t bring himself to answer that, his mouth pressing together and his jaw cramping. His eyes stare into nothingness as his brain tries to compile a good enough answer, an answer worthy enough to bring you some kind of ease.

Jin begins walking towards his car, briefcase held tightly in his hand as the loud sounds of the city begin to drown out his inner thoughts again. He should be okay, He has just won another case, another accomplishment to add to his resume and he contemplates if he should share this with you, but he fears you’re going to read through his tone, peeling away at his facade.

Nothing can hide the anxiousness that sprouts inside of him, sprawling and taking up spaces where his tranquility once remained.

“Yeah, i've been fine” he responds quietly, offering you a lie - hoping that you will take it.

A heavy sigh falls from your mouth and Jin inhales sharply, while he gives you a breath of air - he pulls himself deeper into despair.

“Good” you whisper, your vocal cords burning after having held your breath.

Jin blinks quickly trying to moisten his tired and scratchy eyes as if you could see him through the phone. his hand subconsciously moving to straighten his tie and suit jacket, perfecting his deception.

“I saw you on the news giving that press conference on the case” you comment, a smile emerging on your face, one that Jin can picture in his mind.

“Mhm” Jin hums, caught off guard by the topic.

“You looked very professional, very mister lawyer” your voice holds childish excitement and Jin smiles again, closing his eyes and beginning to imagine a life where he is but a typical lawyer and you his friend, a girl who hasn’t gone through the things that you have. A Y/n that has remained the same cheerful and spoiled girl that he once knew so well, never having been pushed into a life of crime and deception, much like he has.

His Y/n, his friend that he will never betray.

“Oh yeah? I wore my good tie today” he jokes, beginning to descend the steps in front of the courthouse.

“How did it go? Did you free the guy?” you inquire and Jin remains silent, his chest becoming heavier with the question.

“Give me details, i want to know how you kicked ass today” the harmony of your laughter causes him further shame, There is so much you don’t know and no amount of bravery can convenience Jin to tell you.

“Well you know me i can’t lose” Jin sighs and his line fills with your laughter again.

“It’s a good thing I have you on my side then.”

Those words cause Jin’s heart to stop full throttle, the hand that presses the phone to his ear growing limp. It takes everything for him not to divulge the truth, to not break your heart further. If he’s honest it's not clear to him whose side he stands in, who is he truly helping? For someone as calculated as him, that question still remains unanswered.

His god complex has led him to believe there is a way he can help the both of you without betraying the other but atlas, as he hears your voice for the first time in weeks he concludes he has been foolish.

Dread fills him up, his body unresponsive and he feels as though the phone call has lasted an eternity, your innocent statement only further torturing him. His intentions were always to protect you like an older brother would, trying to conceal you from the man he had built a bond with so many years ago, but who is he kidding, who is he lying to?

To you or to himself.

“You should come to visit me, it gets lonely here - I thought I would be able to escape it but it appears it has followed me here too.”

Your voice is but a whisper yet Jin can hear the strain in it, can almost picture you swallowing back tears that you have not allowed yourself to release in a long time.

“We can meet at the cafe” he interjects, purposely avoiding your offer.

“Oh don’t be silly, I trust you.”

His heart lurches forward and he rips the phone from his ear for a moment, unable to endure the conversation any longer, you are oblivious to the pain you are causing him, to the agony he is putting himself through the longer he stays on the call with you.

“Y/n i think -” he speaks into the line.

“86 Pyeongchang- dong, Jongno-gu-”

Jin shuts his eyes as the address falls from your lips, a grimace pouring over his features and he wishes you hadn’t said that, he prays he can forget.

“So what do you say?” your voice echoes.

Jin clears his throat, trying to break himself out of the panicked trance he is currently in, his throat aches as he tries to find an excuse good enough for you not to suspect him, because what kind of friend would he be if he didn’t go? What kind of friend would he be if he did?

His mouth opens to give you a gentle rejection, his eyes roaming the front of the courthouse whilst he trashes his brain for an excuse. “You know i would love to but-” his eyes stop moving and the words he means to say trail into silence, from the corner of his eye he catches a glimpse of a black SUV - its owner leaned comfortably against it as a puff of smoke falls from their lips - their eyes completely focused on him.

Jin can feel every muscle in his body constrict, his skin growing pale - he blinks, hoping that the sight before him is only but a product of his lack of sleep and paranoia but when his eyes open again, the same man remains. his eyes held in a glare as a mischievous grin rips through the cigarette that lays between his lips and the dread Jin had been trying to suppress for days now comes pummeling down all too fast through his veins.

“Jin?” you ask, noticing the long pause.

From where Taehyung stands he watches as Jin stares wide eyed in his direction. He leans away from the SUV, unfolding his arms from his chest, offering Jin a small wave.

“Jin?” you call out again and this time Jin’s eyes trail back to the phone in his hand.

“I have to go Y/n '' he whispers, there's a change in his tone but you can barely make it out from the shuffling that follows after, your eyebrows furrowing with concern.

you aren’t unfamiliar with Jin's tendency to abruptly say goodbye but this time it’s different, you can sense panic through the silence he gives you - your line now crowded with the sound of the city.

“Wait, Jin what is happening?” you ask frantically and Jin can hear you but he doesn’t answer, his mind wondering if you would be this concerned for him if you knew who he truly was.

Jin ends the call before he can speak again, sliding his phone into his suit jacket carefully - he clears his throat and adjusts his posture, his hand moving to push back the strands of his hair that have fallen in front of his face. swiftly changing his expression from one of utter fear to casualness, the shift causing him to grow dizzy.

“Taehyung,” he calls out eagerly through his teeth.

Taehyung studies Jin’s demeanor, his fingers moving to dispose of the cigarette in his mouth before he forces a chuckle out.

“Jin, long time no see” he responds, the lack of enthusiasm in his voice appareant.

Jin scoffs and laughs slightly, trying his hardest to conceal the panic that rips through him.

“It's always a good day when you don't have to see me ” Jin replies and the statement causes Taehyung's smile to slip. In the past Taehyung would’ve taken the insignificant words as banter but given the circumstances, given the strain that has formed between the friendship it sounds more like a threat to him.

“Is this something that couldn’t wait for office hours?” Jin continues, looking towards the 2 other men who stand beside Taehyung, their hands held by their belt - indication of the gun’s that remain concealed there.

It's not a friendly visit.

“I wanted to stop by to congratulate you on the big win” Taehyung states but Jin knows better, they’ve never shown up for any of his other one’s.

“A bouquet of flowers and a pretty card would have sufficed” Jin says nonchalantly standing in front of them now, the grip on his briefcase growing tighter with each second that passes by, his body consumed with the urgent need to throw up.

“I was watching you know?” Taehyung smirks “you looked a bit off, a bit nervous.”

Jin’s smile fades, his jaw locking with the reminder of his previous state in the courtroom - the vile memories flood into his head and his casual facade drops for a moment, his eyes flickering with distress.

“Me? Nervous?” Jin chuckles, attempting to recuperate from the humiliation.

“Im Kim Seok-Jin.”

“That you are” Taehyung distills poison with his words, his tone simmering with a certain harshness.

“Jungkook wants to congratulate you too, you should come with us” Taehyung adds, his smirk pulled wide.

Jin’s heart slams into his chest, his head heavy on his shoulders. He wonders how much Jungkook knows, if he is aware of the role he has played in the chaos his family is currently facing and as his eyes remain on Taehyung's face he can’t read past his meek expression - his talent to perceive things momentarily tested by the exhaustion that sinks in his body.

He knows Taehyung is not making an offer he can decline, but rather an invitation he has to accept. A pact of loyalty made many years ago imposed by guilty reminders of the person he used to be.

“You guys shouldn’t have gone through the trouble”

Jin laughs sarcastically - stepping closer to Taehyung.

“Trust me, it's no trouble at all” Taehyung taunts, raising his eyebrows and tilting his head.

Jin can feel his throat closing in on itself - his eyes lowering to the guns that poke out of the pressed suits the men standing along with them wear, warning him that the friendship he once shared with Jungkook and Taehyung has changed. No longer were they just boys being boys, no longer did they blindly trust each other.

Now they were men waiting for the moment one crossed the other.

Jin nods faintly, his eyes looking in every direction ensuring there’s no one around to bear witness to what is happening or perhaps hoping someone is.

He does not object, instead he willingly steps forward even if he feels his heart racing with each movement he makes - the sensation is uncanny, he should be able to trust the man who stands holding out the door for him but contrary to what he knows he should be feeling, the desire to run for the hills remains.

Jin can feel the thick, tense air choke him as the car peels away from the courthouse, his heart feeling as though it's stuck inside of his stomach, applying agonizing pressure and though he sits in complete silence, unable to move an inch - he can feel Taehyung eyes intently observing him.

He wants to say something, anything that will bring them back to like when they were younger - longing to mend what has been fractured but no words come to him and as the seconds pass by in the harrowing car ride alongside someone whom he once shared everything with, he comes to the inevitable conclusion that he doesn’t want to reconcile. The similarities that once had tied them all together now being differences he can’t bring himself to overlook. Yet, The desire to make amends leaves its residual inside of him.

Time is cruel and they were not exempt from its vicious wrath.

It had all begun with a school punishment, one that would lead Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jin to cross paths and become the bestest of friends and while Jungkook and Taehyung enjoyed a life of luxury and gluttony all thanks to the blood money their families were producing, Jin fought against the poverty that ripped through his. Who could blame him for wanting that same life? Not when his friends had allowed him such quick access to it, not when Jungkook paid for his college education under the promise that Jin would some day work for him.

A promise that Jin had kept for a long time, until he came face to face with the truth of what his friends had become or in retrospect what they had always been.

Back then Jin never thought of the consequences his actions would someday bring him, back then all he wanted was to be in Jungkook’s and Taehyung's world and now that he was, now that he was who had always dreamed of being - he was forever indebted.

What could he do now that their interests no longer aligned? The only person that could blame Jin now was himself.

The SUV arrives at the small restaurant Jin has visited many times before, it is the same restaurant where they have all shared their first drinks, their first heart breaks. Where they shared stories of their childhoods and their dreams. Where Jungkook had served Jin his entire future on a silver platter and the starving boy had eaten from it without a second thought.

The meal now heavy on his shoulders, the weight of the burden forcing him to kneel before a man he has betrayed.

As Jin steps out he notices Jungkook’s men standing along every corner of the street, evidence of the havoc he has contributed to in full display. His stare lowers as he stands in front of the restaurant and with a heavy sigh he takes in all that has changed since the last time he was here. memories of their laughter fills his mind and it dissolves his courage, in its place now a feeling of vulnerability he does not like nor is willing to accept. He senses Taehyung’s presence standing besides him and then feels his hand harshly slam on his shoulder, a tight grip coming soon after.

“Welcome back” Taehyung whispers eerily into his ear.

Jin is guided inside by the men who have accompanied him, Taehyung following closely behind. He hasn’t seen Jungkook in a long time. he fears he might not be able to recognize him, fears he won't be able to see the boy that he had once defended against the world, the boy who trusted him but due to the lack of contact probably no longer does.

Not that he would expect him to either.

He notes the vacancy inside of the restaurant which is usually packed with customers at this time, all the tables empty while music softly plays through the space. It reminds Jin of a museum. While the outside looks like a completely different place, the inside appears to be stuck in the same year the 3 of them had made the pact to always stay together.

He is soon filled with acrid nostalgia, the same feeling he had felt when he first saw Taehyung standing in front of the courthouse.

As he continues his path he can feel his steps falter and it's like he’s forcing himself to walk, unable to take the guilt that makes a home inside of him the longer he remains in here. He is reminded of who he was, of who he no longer is and it aches, an ache his sleepless body can’t process.

When Jin reaches the back of the restaurant his eyes land on Jungkook, his lungs drawing a breath he doesn’t dare release as he scans the man who does not notice his arrival. Jungkook sits in one of the many empty tables, his face lowered as he brings another string of noodles to his mouth yet, there’s not a hint of tranquility in his demeanor, his shoulders tensed and eyebrows furrowed.

It's apparent he is disgruntled, Jin can perceive the strain his body and mind are under from where he stands- the scene before him causing him to grow mortified and his thoughts don't miss a beat as they remind him that this is his doing.

“Kook” Taehyung speaks, dragging Jungkook’s attention to the men that stand before him, apprehension carved into his expression.

The breath Jin has been gripping in his lungs escapes through his nostrils as he takes in Jungkook’s face - his skin pale and eyes hollowed and if he thought he was tired, perhaps drained then Jungkook has got him beat.

“Was any of this necessary?” Jin raises his eyebrows, a smirk forming on his lips - his voice echoes within the empty restaurant and he concludes it is best to push his conflicted thoughts to the side.

Jin can see the exhaustion in Jungkook's eyes, proof of the many nights he has spent in search for you and Jin struggles to believe that it’s just anger that fuels him but he concludes that there is too much he has missed and although he wants to think that he is staring at a friend, just as he had expected it’s like he is facing a complete stranger.

Jungkook slowly wipes his mouth and pushes away the plates in front of him, a smirk crawling onto his mouth accompanied with a small laugh.

“Just a bit of guidance, you know in case you got lost” he chews.

“How polite of you” Jin retorts sarcastically.

In spite of the fact they both attempt to conceal the animocity, the distance between the two friends is evident. Their bond strained, the thread that once held them together a pull away from snapping and they can both sense it as their eyes met.

“Take a seat” Jungkook offers, gesturing to the empty chair in front of him.

“Im fine here” Jin responds, eyes glancing over at the men who stand on each side of Jungkook, holding the same threatening posture as the ones who had shown up with Taehyung moments before.

“Jin” Jungkook snaps, his patience withering away with each minute that passes.

“Sit.”

This time his voice is stern, demanding and it rattles Jin’s composure.

Jungkook’s glare holds irritation; his fruitless vendor slowly drives him further away from rationality. The utter desperation that runs through his body makes him grow a little bit more insolent as time ticks by.

Jin pulls out the chair in front of him and slowly sits in it- concern written all over his expression as he stares Jungkook down.

“How have you been Jungkook?” Jin asks, the worry in his tone genuine.

“ I'm pretty you know the answer to that” Jungkook retorts, pouring himself another cup of whiskey.

Jin’s eyes trail from Jungkook to the amber liquid that falls into the glass, a grimace emerging on his expression while he watches the alcohol hit the rim.

“Well now you have me here, what is it that you need?” Jin clears his throat, he knows it's a stupid question to ask, he has already made his own assumptions of what this is all about but he opts to feign ignorance.

Jungkook raises the overflowing glass to his lips, the taste causing him to hiss but he takes another gulp and then another until his tongue grows numb and his chest aches - the glass now half empty.

“Oh i'm sorry, am i taking up your time Mr. Lawyer?” Jungkook leans his head to the side, a crazed look in his eyes “are you too busy for me? All those big cases, all those big wins” Jungkook's words drag with venom - dispersing into the hostile air and trickling down Jin’s skin.

“All thanks to me of course” he concludes and Jin lowers his head, a small chuckle emitting from his lips.

“Is that why I'm here then? You thought I needed a reminder?” Jin comments.

“It seemed like you had forgotten” Jungkook snaps.

But Jin hasn’t, The thought that he has everything he has because of a criminal is rather ironic given his line of work, an irony that has enabled him to defend the most evil kind of men, something he has never been able to remove from the back of his head, the only thing that keeps him from believing he is a good person.

“You have been holding onto that one for a while haven’t you” Jin smirks, a hint of repulsion in his tone.

“Trust me i don't forget, i have to live with that decision for the rest of my life” Jin adds bitterly and Jungkook’s expression twists with certain chagrin.

Jungkook sighs and leans his head back, placing the glass in his hand carefully on the table. He presses his lips together with distaste, his eyes closing for a moment while he allows Jin’s words to settle in his brain.

Jungkook knows how much his decisions have brought them apart, it hurts him to know that now Jin can no longer see him as a friend and though the remorse remains packed up inside of him, there are no words significant enough that can express it.

Yet, they both know he had no other choice. He couldn’t dream like Jin could - couldn’t choose a career apart from the one forced on him the day his parents were killed but he doesn’t dare open his mouth to defend himself this time, allowing their friendship to fall victim to collateral damage.

“I need to know where Y/n is, Jin.”

Everything becomes muffled for Jin once again and those emotions that had left him trapped within his own mind in the courtroom come back crashing down all too fast, his throat compressing, which he tries to remedy with a gulp.

He has known the motive for this meeting since that phone call and yet, nothing has prepared him for the statement Jungkook makes, his stare faltering at what this implicates.

Jin can’t bring himself to speak and when he finally dissects Jungkook’s demeanor he confirms what he has feared all along, Jungkook knows something and though, he might not know the entire extent of his betrayal, the fact that Jungkook believes he can come to him for information is sufficient for his heart to swell with dread.

“Why-” the word comes out a mumble, quieter than a mouse, his mouth filled with cotton as he tries to make sense of what he wants to say or better yet how he will excuse the accusation Jungkook has silently made but his mind is as blank as his stare.

Jungkook watches Jin’s expression with careful eyes and though he is tired and his eyes feel heavy as he blinks, he inspects Jin with precision. ready to pick up on any hint of deceit.

“Have you forgotten who placed you in her life? Or did you convince yourself it was pure coincidence?” Jungkook states “i made you apply to be her tutor, i fabricated recommendations, i made sure that you appeared to be the best fucking tutor there was in fucking korea so that you could keep tabs on her, to ensure that she was living a good life in spite of her fathers endevors.”

Jin lowers his stare, the reminder seeping cruelly inside of him - the fact that he has been lying to you for years revealing itself through Jungkook’s mouth, he has been unable and unwilling to divulge the truth about what his real intentions were when he appeared in your home under the guise of a tutor, of a mentor.

It had been all a lie.

But He had miscalculated how much you would eventually mean to him, how much he would come to want to protect you even from the man he was most loyal to.

He gained your trust, your friendship all so that Jungkook could monitor you and though initially it had been an orchestrated lie, everything else after that has been real.

Jin glances away, his eyes filling with tears. His heart fills with disappointment, with inexpicable pain as his eyes flicker back to Jungkook.

“So Imagine my surprise when i find that you have been meeting her for years” Jungkook spits, his hand sliding a manila folder in front of Jin, his intense glare on Jin as he waits for him to open it.

“Jungkook '' Jin utters, his eyes fixed on the folder lying in front of it.

“Go on” Jungkook demands, his voice jumping from the walls.

Jin sighs heavily, his reluctant hand reaching for the folder. His mind rushing with ideas of what the folder can contain.

His hand trembles against the paper as he throws it open. In Front of him now an array of pictures taken of you and him entering and leaving the small cafe on different occasions and he swears in that moment his heart stops beating.

“Have you been the one that has been putting things in her head? Did you not measure how dangerous this all could be for her?” Jungkook barks.

Jin’s ears ring with the questions thrown in his direction - his hand closing the folder quickly before he pushes it away. He raises his stare back to Jungkook, who hasn’t stopped glaring in his direction.

“You had me followed?” Jin asks.

“Are you surprised?” Jungkook retorts.

“You are insane” Jin scoffs “you have really lost it this time Jungkook - you go around the city destroying everything in your path, go to Yoongi’s club like a fucking manic for what? On a whim that he would know where she is?”

“I'm going to stop you right there Jin,” Jungkook interjects, standing from his chair.

“I would burn this entire city to the ground if it means I get to find her.”

When Jin stares into Jungkook’s eyes he can see the utter determination ripping through his exhaustion.

“I don't know where Y/n is” Jin responds coldly.

Jungkook smirks, his eyes glazing with darkness - his patience withering dangerously thin.

“Please dont take my generosity as weakness Kim Seok-Jin, you will tell me where Y/n is even if i have to torture it out of you” Jungkook regrets those words only after they have been said, his mind flooding with hesitation - the feeling only increasing as he notices the fear he has instilled in Jin.

It pains him to know he has been pushed to this point - his own desperation luring him to see the cause of their strained friendship in Jin’s eyes.

“She is my friend, i would never betray her, if you had been different to her, if you had shown her how much you cared about her then perhaps -” Jin speaks and though the words are meant for Jungkook, it’s like he is trying to convince himself that he wouldn’t betray you once again.

“How much will she consider you a friend when she finds out the truth?” Jungkook asks and Jin can’t answer - he knows Jungkook is right but it doesn’t make the idea of him giving you away any easier.

“When she finds out the real reason you walked into her life? When she knows that you have been my friend for years, covering and cleaning up behind me?”

Jin’s mind is flooded with the memories of all your meetings - of how much he had retracted from the information he had given you in hopes he could conceal the role he had played in the desolate life you had been living.

Jungkook’s dad wasn’t the one that kept his criminal record clean, he was.

And Taehyung’s accident, He was the one who paid that family off.

And all the other countless messes he had made go away, all because they were his friends.

“Why are you so keen on finding her? Haven’t you done enough” Jin asks, his eyebrows furrowing with confusion. He had never seen Jungkook so desperate, if he truly wanted revenge against you he knew Jungkook to be the type of man to wait out that kind of retribution, why was he so relentless, it didn't make sense.

Jungkook lowers his gaze - the clock ticking inside of his head leaving echoes in each empty space that is not taken by the thought of you.

“I have no intentions to hurt her Jin” Jin picks up on the dejection in Jungkook's tone, his stare faltering “not anymore but my father on the other hand, he needs someone to blame - for someone to punish and i need to find her before he can.”

Jin disassociates from the room- a culmination of feelings rampaging through his body and he doesn’t know if Jungkook's words are true, his own lack of sleep and the complexity of the situation leaving him stunt.

will he really protect you in the way he says he will? Or is this another plan?

Another method to get you back in their hands.

Was this for your own good?

“Jin” Jungkook exhales.

The answer Jungkook needs sits on the tip of Jin’s tongue - uncertainty keeping his mouth shut. He can feel his heart drumming rapidly, the sound leaving him deaf. Would this really count as a betrayal? If he was only doing what he thought was best for you?

“Jin” Jungkook repeats, a sense of urgency in his tone.

“Give me-” Jin sighs, tears building on the edge of his eyes. He stares at Jungkook while his chin trembles, his eyes speaking words he can’t bring himself to say.

“86 Pyeongchang- dong, Jongno-gu” Jin whispers.

In that moment Jin comes face to face with the inexorable truth, that no matter how much he fights, no matter how much he changes, no matter who he defends….he is just like them.

𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦.

𝐢 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐢𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐞 𝐯𝐬. 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐩

𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐤/𝐝𝐦 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

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