#hiding behind the sofa

[leletha-jann]

I have a new Wild Theory, just in case anyone thought it was safe to come out from behind the sofa (it's not):

If Klaus is indeed aboard Castle Wulfenbach, which I believe he is, and acting under wasp-enforced orders, the question becomes: "Who's giving those orders?"

We've been guided to think about Zola, which is a reasonable guess because we haven't seen her in a while, and she's not just going to conveniently vanish.

But...

I suspect the involvement of Princess Terebithia, because she was last seen with Zola, because we were recently told that she's conveniently missing, and because she scares me.

But that still leaves the question of "How are they giving Klaus orders?" Zola has a Lucrezia copy in her head, but she doesn't sound like Lucrezia as far as I know. She doesn't have the Command Voice.

...you know who did have the Command Voice? And who Terebithia in particular might have managed to get hold of?

And who would be a fantastically out-of-nowhere player to reenter the game at this point?

Anevka.

...

So here's my math:

Terebithia would have had access to Sturmhalten, where clank Anevka's head was stored. (It's controlled by the Empire, but it's her family's castle.)

Anevka has the Command Voice and can command revenants (thanks, Tarvek).

Anevka could give Klaus orders under her grandmother's instruction.

Anevka sounds like the Other - because the version of the Other that Wulfenbach troops have encountered most is Agatha. Anevka has Agatha's voice. So that could be affecting the reports coming off of Castle Wulfenbach from the evacuees right now.

...

This could be nothing more mysterious than a Valois power play...and I notice Martellus is oh-so-conveniently right here to take command if the opportunity presents itself. If his family has - without his knowledge, I think - set the stage for him to do so.

But. Yeah.

Who could be giving Klaus orders?

Zola to provide the information about useful pawns from her copy of Lucrezia. Terebithia to organize and plan. And Anevka to give the orders to all these wasped revenants who've been in motion lately...

...

Like I said, a Wild Theory, and I'm probably wrong. But I'm still not coming out from behind the sofa just yet.

(This post now has a self-reblog with me elaborating on this theory, check it out!)

[catliker49]

Surprise!

Quite literally! I have Finally drawn again! I am so Happy! My style is a bit rough.. or perhaps I should say... ruff! (Haha, sorry!) but that's just because I have not drawn anything other than my Final Piece for the past few months!

OH!! SPEAKING OF! I GOT DISTINCTIONS IN EVERYTHING! HAHA! (The highest grade for everything! Yay!) OOH! And! Final thing.. I am starting to use my name for my Signature, so, if you can spot it, that is why it does not say Catliker :O)

[yeah-thats-probably-it]

It’s possible that Jeeves is just saying this to mollify Bertie - hiding behind furniture to avoid being seen isn’t exactly something you’d have to be a genius to come up with - but what always jumps out to me about this passage is how sad it is that Bertie is so used to being yelled at and insulted by his “friends” and relatives that when someone actually compliments him it distracts him from whatever else was going on

(On the other hand, it’s also possible Jeeves was being sincere - it IS true that he had every reason to believe Bertie would come up with something to avoid being seen, he’s even seen him do the hide-behind-furniture thing before (Thank You, Jeeves). Maybe this is the Jeeves equivalent of Bertie breathlessly telling anyone who will listen about how brilliant and courageous Jeeves was for throwing a raincoat over a swan’s head)

[shittywriterbrain]

bertie wooster my beloved part 3

[leletha-jann]

The degree to which this page is tripping panic reactions from my foundation fandom is unreal.

I don't LIKE things that sound like "warp core breach imminent". I don't LIKE things that suggest collision courses. I don't LIKE the phrase "ramming speed!"

We already had the Red Alert sirens going in my brain, but now they're real.

Holy Yodeling Cloud Turtles

wow. loving everything that oath is implying about aviation in Europa. That is delightful.

Also if whomever wrecks Gil's childhood home (and tries to like. explode Mechanicsburg or whatever, that would also annoy me) I am going to hate it very much

[littlemousywitch]

“Hide Behind the Sofa Moments” from my childhood

[leletha-jann]

OK, we all know I'm on Team Klaus Is Not Where We Left Him, hiding behind the sofa with everyone else.

What I didn't consider until this week of pages were the upsides of this situation, specifically with the party makeup of the "raid Castle Wulfenbach" mission.

ASSUMING WE'RE RIGHT...

Let's be real here. Klaus confronted with/captured by a party consisting of Agatha, Tarvek of all people, all the Jägergenerals he knows of - and specifically not Gil - would shut the hell up and shut the hell down. They would not get anything out of him by any possible means.

A party that includes Othar AND Boris?!?!

Whether he has wasped orders or not, I think Klaus will run his absolute mouth off to Othar and/or Boris, albeit in different ways. Boris he'll justify himself to, and Boris will feel he has the right to ask Klaus for explanations. Othar will wind him up beyond tolerances just by existing...not to mention storming Klaus' castle that he just took command of again, all righteous and loud and obnoxious and, y'know, Othar.

...this is going to be an infodump of all time. Class is going to be in session.

I'm still hiding behind the sofa. But I'm bringing a notepad and a pen, too.

[leletha-jann]

SO. MUCH. INFODUMPING. is about to happen. They sent the people Klaus is most absolutely guaranteed to run his mouth off at (Boris and Othar) to deal with him. I'm so here for it.

Yes, join us in hiding behind the sofa, the admission price is POPCORN.

Well, congrats to all of you who predicted this…may the couch protect us from the oncoming storm.

And I just remembered that Othar was still on the airship the last time we saw him, meaning we are about to get Klaus and Othar in the same place for this first time since the beginning of the comic.

Actually, the couch may not be enough to protect us from the oncoming chaos

[satans-knitwear]

She would like to offer you a "well worn" sock in these trying times. She will gently hold it until you are ready to accept.

[doghowto]

My Dog Keeps Hiding Behind the Couch! How to Help + What's Happening!

[littlechillis]

"think [mikel arteta] is more of a bean bag man"

[luvcaleb]

DO YOU WANT MORE?

nsfw (18+). includes implied marathon sex, unprotected sex, breeding, breast play, squirting, caleb fucks roughly but still does tender gestures <3, nicknames (pipsqueak is possibly the worst they could've picked for a canon nickname but this is my attempt at making it sound hot). filthy smut from top to bottom. likes and reblogs will be very helpful !!

“C'mon, pipsqueak, raise your hips.”

Caleb squeezes your waist, his thrusts changing from a deep, persistent grind that makes you feel every inch of his cock to a fast-paced pounding. You've long lost feeling in your legs, and the only thing keeping you from sprawling on the bed is Caleb's tight grip on your hips, fucking into you relentlessly from behind.

“Ah...! Wait, Caleb, haah, no more...!”

Each thrust loudly snaps the bedframe against the wall, but it isn't enough to hide the squelching noises between your legs. Slick and cum drip down your thighs, staining the sheets into ruin. They get even messier with a few more thrusts as you gush around his cock unannounced, squirting into the cum-soaked bedsheets.

Caleb groans as your cunt squeezes around him, trying to coax out more of his hot cum. “Fuck, baby, you're so tight... Feels good when your cunt sucks on my cock...”

His hand slides to your squirting pussy, rubbing circles on your clit. More slick jets out of you, soaking his palm. Squealing, you try to crawl away him him, gripping tightly on the blankets that have been slipping off the bed.

The delicious pressure against your clit releases, but Caleb pulls you back to his cock. He straightens your back to press against his chest, bottoming out in a single thrust to hit the deepest spot in your pussy. “Ngh, why are you running away? Didn't you say you'd last longer than me, pips?” He pants against your ear, hand tenderly running along your side to soothe you, yet his hips don't stop their merciless thrusts. “Or are you tapping out now?”

Perhaps hours ago, you would have answered with a vehement refusal. But now, with drool dripping from your lips constantly agape from moaning, your clit too sensitive from his insistent flicking and rubbing, and your thoroughly-fucked cunt filled with his loads of cum, the idea of calling it quits sounds appealing.

“I'll do whatever you want, baby. Just say the word,” Caleb murmurs against your skin, his lips molding over your neck to suck another hickey among the marks he already made. “If you want to stop, I'll run the bath and take care of you. We'll cuddle on the sofa and watch that new movie you've been looking forward to.”

His hips stop, having pulled all the way out, the tip barely brushing against your cunt. “But if you don't want to stop...”

Slowly, his hand travels up your torso, squeezing your tits. He plays with your nipples, evoking another gasp out of you. “I'll make you feel good. Fuck any other thought out of your mind so you'll only think of me.”

You whine as his cock rubs along your wet folds, catching on the strings of cum dripping from your pussy. The tip circles around your clit, teases at your opening, just putting it in enough to make you feel its thick girth, but he pulls out too soon.

“What will you choose, baby?”

Your hazy mind can't come up with clear thoughts, foggy from the pleasure. But forming an answer is the easiest thing to do—it's not like he left you with any other choice, anyway.

“Please fuck me, Caleb,” you sob, clinging at the arm cupping your breast. “Please put your cock inside me. Fuck me even if I tell you to stop. Cum... please cum more inside m- ahh!”

You're roughly flipped onto your back, but he holds your head softly to lay you down on the pillow. It's only at this moment that you get to see Caleb's face, brows furrowed, sweat dripping down his temples, his lip bitten red from the strain of holding back. “Shit... you really do know how to rile me up, pipsqueak.”

He looms over you, muscled arms caging you on the bed, chest heaving up and down as he pants. He fixes his position, resting his weight on his knees, and he uses his hands to spread your legs wider. His eyes are dark with lust while he stares at your abused hole, spilling cum on the sheets below you.

“Maybe this time, I really will fuck you pregnant.”

The statement doesn't even register in your mind because he immediately thrusts inside, pounding at your cervix. You gasp, aimlessly grasping at anything you could hold onto as you lose your mind, a fresh stream of cum soaking his cock.

His abs ripple with each thrust, the dirtiest groans and pants leaving his lips. “Fuck, you're so cute... cumming already when I just put it in.” Caleb leans closer, catching both of your wrists to make you wrap your arms around his neck instead of the dirty sheets. “When did you become such a pervert?” He drops his head to suck at your tits, licking your nipples.

It's your fault, you want to say, but all that leaves your mouth are noises you didn't think you were capable of making until Caleb touched you for the first time months ago, and he hasn't stopped since. You heard couples would be insatiable for the first few weeks of dating, but it feels like you're never going to go past that phase.

“Can't even speak because my dick's too good, huh?” Caleb chuckles, thumb resting on your lips. He rubs the tip of your tongue, pleased when you dart out to lick him. “You're the absolute cutest...”

The sounds between your bodies are downright lewd. His cum sloshes inside you every time he fucks you to the bed, forming a creamy ring at the base of his cock. He's filled you up so much with his huge cock and cum, that you wonder how you even have the space to breathe.

Caleb's the type to try to be quiet, but he's not holding back his moans now, groaning his pleasure against your ear.

“This feels too good, shit... Feel like I'm gonna cum soon...” He tucks the hair covering your face behind your ear, pressing a gentle kiss at the corner of your teary eyes, so different from the rough fucking he's giving to your pussy. “I'm gonna blow my load inside you. You want that, don't you?”

You nod desperately, leaning your face on his hand that's cupping your cheek. He smiles, nuzzling against you, but the sweet moment lasts only for a few seconds before he thrusts even faster, chasing his release.

“Fuck, here it comes, I'm cumming...” Caleb drives his cock the deepest it can go, his balls slapping against your ass. “Oh, fuuuuck, I'm cumming!”

Thick, hot strings of cum coat your insides once more, crammed into the tight space of your cunt. Your squirt splashes against his pelvis and abs as you moan high and reedy, scratching lines down his back. He hisses at the slight pain, spurting more cum at the feeling, and he collapses on your body, making sure not to suffocate you with his weight.

“Ah... damn... I don't think I've cum that hard in a while...” He ruffles through your hair, soothingly patting your head. “You doing okay?”

“You're too intense,” you say, your voice weak and groggy. You wrap your arms around him, content to fall asleep and let Caleb take care of things from here.

“Hey, don't fall asleep now.” He pokes your cheek, trying to stir you awake. When you open your eyes, you see Caleb smiling, the one that means he's up to no good. “After all that you said, do you really think this will end with just one round?”

[odoraful]

𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄.ᐟ

what happens when you don't use their pet name to call them?

⟡ content: zayne/sylus/xavier/rafayel x gn!reader; more dialogue heavy; silly and cute

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ZAYNE ⟡

“Can you help me put this on, Zayne?”

From the reflection in the mirror, you tried not to react at the twist in his brow and the momentary confusion in his eyes. Wordlessly, he moved behind you, fingers taking the necklace out of your hand. With his gaze focused on the task before him, you could see him open his mouth, hesitating to speak.

“Did I do something wrong?” he questioned.

Zayne’s deft hands carefully laid the chain around your neck, centering the pendent between your collarbones.

You plastered on your most innocent expression, despite the twinge of guilt you felt at his question.

“Hm? Why do you ask?”

Swiftly, he clasped the ends of the chain together. His eyes flicked towards yours in the mirror.

“You’re calling me by my first name. I thought pet names were an important step in a relationship for you.”

You nodded. “Yes, Zayne, I do think it’s an important step.”

His eyes narrowed at your continual uncharacteristic responses.

Folding his arms, he mused aloud. “It took you some time to drop the title ‘doctor’ for me and to just use my name. After we became official, you were quick to call me ‘love’.”

You fiddled with your necklace, trying to, impossibly, force away the heat from your face.

“So, either I did something to make you upset, or”—he leaned in close to you, the side of his face almost touching yours—“you’re playing a trick on me.”

You gave a mock frown. He cocked his head to the side, awaiting your response.

“Okay, okay, it was a prank.” Sighing, you surrendered to his deductions. “I wanted to see how you’d react, but you saw right through me,” you mumbled.

His lips quirked. “I’ve known you for long enough to figure these things out.”

Wanting to wipe off the amused look he had on his face, you quickly planted a kiss on his cheek. His face turned into surprise. He chuckled, shaking his head at your triumphant smile.

“Thank you for helping me, my love."

SYLUS ⟡

“Sylus, could you play that new record you bought?”

You called from the sofa. Standing by the record player, he turned to face you. The offence on his face was unmistakable as he placed his hands on his hips.

“Sylus?” he scoffed. “We both know that’s not what you call me.”

Your brows furrowed, feigning confusion. “What are you talking about? Isn’t that your name?”

“Sweetie,” he levelled a look of scepticism at you, “that hasn’t been my name for the past month we’ve been together.”

“I still don’t know what you mean, Sylus.”

He paused. Gears turned in his head trying to unpack what was happening, much like he would do when reading the truthfulness of a dealer during a bargain.

“Y/N.”

You’ve never heard your own name being said in such a serious manner. Perhaps you got a taste of your own medicine.

“I’m not particularly fond of lose-lose situations.” The softness in his tone made you feel weak. “You can tell me if I’ve done something to annoy you. I won’t be angry.”

“Not at all!” you quickly blurted out. Unable to hide it any longer, you confessed. “You haven’t done anything to annoy me. I was just trying to pull a small prank.”

All the tension visibly released from his body. A relieved sigh escaped him. “You really do play some dangerous games, kitten.”

Playfulness returned to his voice. “Now then, how will you correct your mistake?”

“Honey,” you drawled out each syllable, making it sound as syrupy as the nickname itself, “could you play that new record you bought now?”

Sylus couldn’t help but laugh at your exaggeration. “Why of course.”

XAVIER ⟡

“Xavier, do you want to try this?”

Subtly glancing at his reaction from the kitchen, you saw his face immediately fall into a pout. The look was fatal, and it took all the willpower you had not to drop the ruse right then and there.

“That’s not my name,” he answered.

“What do you mean?” you chuckled, continuing to put icing on the sugar cookies you baked. “Of course it is!”

“No, it’s not,” he insisted.

Placing his book down, he walked to stand at your side by the counter. You avoided his eye contact, pretending that nothing was amiss.

Resting a hand under his chin, he began to think. “You usually call me bunny, sweetheart, sunshine, or darling.”

Your jaw dropped in amused shock. “You remember all the names I’ve called you?”

His mouth twitches. “There are some more, but… they might be a bit embarrassing to say aloud right now.”

That was enough to make you look at him with wide eyes.

“Xavier!” Your face turned pink as you slapped his shoulder. There was no force behind the hit, but enough to convey your embarrassment.

“You did it again. You used the wrong name.” He stuck his bottom lip out.

You gently poked at his cheek, trying to lift the corner of his lip upwards. “Come on, don’t be sad darling.”

Immediately, he brightened before you.

“It was just a joke I saw couples do online. I wanted to see how you’d react.”

He nodded thoughtfully. “And was my reaction satisfactory?”

“I think it was,” you smiled at him, "but it’s a shame I didn’t film it, it would’ve made for a good Moments post.”

He shook his head. “But, the nicknames we use are only for us.”

The finished cookie in your hand had a bite suddenly taken from it as Xavier leaned down to have a taste.

“I don’t want anyone else to know.”

RAFAYEL ⟡

“Are you ready to go yet, Rafayel?”

He continued to hum to himself, completely ignoring you. You folded your arms as you watched him busy himself with something trivial. He flung open a random cupboard and inspected what appeared to be an assortment of spare art supplies.

“Rafayel,” you called again.

He then turned his attention to the fishbowl in the centre of the room, where a small orange fish darted around.

“Reddie, do you hear something?” he asked, gazing so earnestly into the bowl. This fish paused its movement and stared back at his owner.

“Rafayel~” you sang his name aloud this time, extending the last syllable.

He gasped, apparently receiving some confirmation from Reddie.

“You hear something too? Thank god. I was thinking there must be something wrong with my ears.”

Surveying the room around him, Rafayel intentionally looked past you standing barely a few metres from him, tapping your foot against the wooden floorboards of his studio.

“It sounds like”—he continued—“some kind of voice. Someone familiar to me, but I can’t make out who it is.”

“Rafayel!” you shouted his name between fits of laughter. Only he could respond to your jokes with his own dramatics.

He sucked in a breath in puzzlement. “I wonder who this person is calling out to.”

“Baby,” you finally conceded, “I’m talking to you!”

It seemed like he couldn’t keep up the act either, as he started laughing with you.

“Took you long enough,” he huffed, moving towards you and linking your arm with his. “Otherwise, Reddie and I would have been searching for this phantom voice for the rest of the day.”

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[metalcorebarbie]

i’m watching the idea of you and it’s making me feel severe second hand embarrassment i don’t know how i’ll make it to the end send help

[leletha-jann]

I DID BLOODY TELL EVERYONE.

(Also, Gkika!!! She's OK! The riot is officially cancelled.)

...I mean, I suppose Klaus could be in the timestop in a different place but then what's going on with Castle Wulfenbach?

OH FOR THE LOVE OF-

whelp. There we go. it was a red herring and the pie is on my face. >:/

Klaus! could you not cause new problems for 5 minutes???

[poguelandiarafe]

thinking about getting walked in on by topper and kelce and rafe getting embarrassed <3 (no smut but suggestive)

masterlist

--------

you're sat on rafe's lap, knees hugging his hips while his hands are planted firmly on your waist. the sun casts a golden hue over the living room as you're sat on the sofa, his piercing blue eyes boring into yours, soft smile gracing his lips.

"i love you," you whisper, peppering gentle kisses down his nose, "you're my sweet angel."

you pull back just in time to see the tips of his ears turn red in embarrassment, his head falling backwards to avoid eye contact. you can't help but giggle at how shy he's become.

"stop," he groans, but wraps his arms tighter around your waist, "that's your name."

softly, you cup his face forcing him to meet your gaze, "now it can be yours too."

instead of responding, rafe leans forward capturing your lips in a kiss that soon deepens. your hands move from his face to the back of his neck, pulling him as close to you as possible. he moves his kisses to your neck, nipping and sucking at the skin while you pant and whine in his ear.

then, unexpectedly, the door swings open.

"well, well, well," topper's voice cuts through the room causing you and rafe to separate, chest's heaving, "what do we have here?"

"get out." rafe snaps, his voice clipped.

kelce follows right behind, stopping in his tracks at the sight in front of him. you immediately notice how rafe tenses underneath you, his usual cockiness diminishing to nothing but embarrassment. his hands drop to his sides and he hides his face in your neck, sighing loudly as topper and kelce continue laughing at the situation.

you roll your eyes, growing annoyed that they're still standing in the doorway, until an idea pops into your head. grabbing rafe's hands, you put them back on your waist and he looks up in confusion.

"shut up guys," you glance over your shoulder at them, tone sharp enough to make them pause, "we're in the middle of something."

they share a look, eyebrows furrowed until your hands drop to rafe's belt, slowly starting to undo it. rafe's eyes widen in shock, mumbling in your ear to stop.

"fuck no." kelce blurts, nearly tripping over his own feet at how fast he's out the door, topper following quickly behind.

the door slams shut and you turn to face rafe, his cheeks flushed and eyes wide. he can't decide if he's more embarrassed at being walked in on or turned on at how confidently you handled it.

"did you have to do that?" he groans, though he follows it with a laugh.

you simply shrug, fingers coming to trace his jaw, "they should've knocked."