#hi yes these are. very generic hhh

[frollosversion]

Part 3/Last Part before it slips out of my head.

"How much of a Father am I?"

Again to new readers, this is the little backstory of Claude raising Quasi.

Part 1

Part 2

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"M-master—!!" Quasimodo immediately greeted as soon as he saw the silhouette of his master's hat by the entrance of the bell tower.

Quasimodo grew up to be a happy boy albeit Frollo's opposite nature, very much like the archdeacon's personality; he respects claude so much, as much as possible he doesn't want to anger him— also because he receives punishments at times. a nice boy in general.

Quasimodo learned to read by the age of 3 and was already writing legibly at age 4. Claude was so surprised that the child had steady fingers despite his hands being a bit bigger than most kids. Of course he doesn't want to say he's proud but he does reward him with fresh bread and a small bunch of grapes which is different from his usual meal (stale bread and water).

Quasi was already 5 when he started to take interest in drawing. His subjects are mostly the people that he sees from below. Sometimes he asks his guardian to go down the bell tower just to draw them better so Frollo had to explain to him that he can't.

"M-master, why can't i go down the bell tower?" The little boy asked.

He expects him to answer 'because you're ugly' or whatever but at that time, he heard something else.

"People are cruel down there, my dear boy. They take advantage of you especially if you look nothing like them— which applies to you. A lot of them are evil and are just as corrupt as any other beings."

"Can't I just...maybe.. go out there one day, master?" The boy insisted.

"Do you want people to use you and take advantage of you? They are wicked and rotten, Quasimodo."

"But—"

"Think of your mother, boy! If your mother took her advantage on you and abandoned you, what makes you think you can't last a day with this disgusting, horrifying, vulgar crowd?! Remember that I am the only one who took you in with kindness." Claude raised his voice as his patience goes thin"

"S-sorry, master." Quasimodo apologized.

"If wanted to draw them, deal with it by drawing them from here. Do what you want but you are not to leave this bell tower. Do you understand??"

"Y-yes, master frollo."

"Remember what I taught you?"

"This... This is my sanctuary." Quasimodo sighed softly.

"That's right, my dear boy. This is your sanctuary. You're a smart kid." Frollo says sitting down, taking huge book from the shelf. "Shall we review your alphabet today?"

The 5-year old boy's sorry eyes are then replaced with delight.

"Yes master, I would love that very much!"

"Very well... A?"

"A-abomination."

"B?"

"Blasphemy..?"

"C?"

"C-c-contrition!"

"Good." Claude praises. "D?"

"Damnation."

"E?"

"Eternal Damnation..?"

"F?"

Quasimodo paused for a bit as he forgot what it was. He knows his master's gonna scold him if he forgets but he couldn't really remember so he tries to answer something else. Something closer...

"F-frollo—"

"Excuse me??" Claude tilts his head and furrowed his brows, making sure he heard it right. Quasimodo could only stutter in response.

Claude internally finds it so hilarious but he's never laughed in front of his child so he tries to keep a straight face, but his face certainly red for holding it.

"Hhh—kkk.." Claude snickered, looking away at the child.

"Sorry master... sorryyy." The child approached him, trying to look at his guardian's face.

"Th-that's your homework, okay? Know what the rest of your alphabet is." His voice came out stern despite him crumbling to his own thoughts.

"Yes, master." Quasimodo responded.

"I still have my duties. I'll see you at dinner." He placed the book down and stood up, leaving the bell tower.

Claude let out a good laugh after leaving him at the belltower. He still finds it hilarious and cute at the same time.

"Hahahha, he said 'Frollo'. That's amusing."

Frollo's mind was occupied by that small moment as he works in the palace of justice.

That night, he was eager to see his child more than usual.

—end—

[youtry2replaceurself]

Trump lay in bed as he stared at the ceiling. What'd he do now? Biden had dropped out- replaced by... someone else. His neutral expression melted into something more bitter. But also a mix of something else. Albeit not something particularly positive.

His thoughts were interrupted by a Bzzz-! from his phone next to him.

He grabbed it hesitantly, at least glad to have something to distract him from Biden.

But Trump groaned as he looked at the notification on the screen.

My love <3 - 7 seconds ago

Hey, honey, mind meeting up sometime? I wanna talk.

Of course it was him. Clearly pissed at the interruption, he grumbled something to himself and sat up. Trump angrily tapped in a code and it opened up to the messages app.

what do u want

I'm just asking if we could meet up soon.

y

I'd just like to talk about something. About me dropping out, but also something else.

y not text? also we already discussed u dropping out

Biden took a moment to reply. A little bubble that wrote a mere few dots hovered in the corner no longer than 10 seconds. He typed very slowly, but Trump was used to it.

How about we go out for coffee? I'll pay for it.

fine, when

11 AM? It's in about two hours and 30 minutes. That's enough time.

today?

Yes.

Ok, sure. see u there, ily

Love you too, honey.

(I'll make more btw) (hhh sorry idk anything about the presidents. Especially politics in general, simply because I do not care for it) (doing this for the funnies)

[bloodplague]

Hi💕💕💕 Could you please make some general hc about toby like his habits and his routine please?

Send hugs ad kisses!

I also wanted to say that i love your content :)

Ticci Toby - Headcanons

AHH THANK YOU SO MUCH!! And Ilysm for requesting that, seriously!! <333 and OF COURSE!

I'm trying to be as realistic & canon as possible with those headcanons, there's a lot to say about Toby anyway! :]

Headcanons:

Toby does not remember his past canonically, due to his amnesia. So, he is not a grumpy or constantly depressed person. He can be very talktive around people he likes due to his ADHD and mania episodes which both cause hyperactivity. (Bipolar contains mania)

Toby doesn't really care about people that aren't his fond ones. At all. He will only care about someone or at least show a tiny bit of interest if the person looks beautiful or seems interesting in any way. I think that because he once wanted to keep a woman alive who, in his words, looked beautiful. Of course he changed his mind after she pissed him off, but yes, he wanted to see if she deserved to live and gave her a chance.

He loves playing Mario Cart with BEN, as he finds a strange comfort in it. That is because he used to play Video games in his childhood with either his sister or the neighbor kid.

If he smokes, he starts violently coughing like an seizing camel.

He loves wearing sweatpants and turtlenecks when he's in the mansion. He doesn't usually change his clothes when he's going to bed and just sleeps in what he is wearing. For missions, he simply throws a hoodie over the turtleneck and puts on some jeans with a belt for his hatchets. Nothing super special. -- ((My AU has the Creepypasta mansion thing, yes. I at least have my own logical explanation for why and hhh so yeah,))

Toby forgets his things basically everywhere, no matter if it are his goggles, his mouthguard, his hatchets, etc... Mainly due to his amnesia, but also because of his schizophrenia. Schizophrenia causes disorganized speech and thoughts at times, so he might jump from topic to topic.

He doesn't really listen when people talk to him or at leasts struggles with it. It's hard to talk about something he cares about. If he doesn't care, he will simply not listen. IF he cares and tries to listen, he will get distracted super easily. After he asked a question, his attention might be gone already once you start speaking.

Toby is not rude but sassy. He's not praticularly mean to people but will get sassy when given the chance since he's a jerk.

His favorite animals are raccoons, owls, cheetahs and moths.

He has a weird obsession with fire. He loves committing arson.

Toby has a lot of damage in his room because he throws his hatchets at the figures he sees due to his schizophrenia.

Toby constantly wears his gloves or bandages to cover up the wounds on his hands. He only lets specific people like EJ check on his hands or Nurse Ann, so they can just roughly patch him up. Otherwhise, he keeps them hidden to not seem vulnerable.

This man has an EXTREME fear of abandonment. Once he gets close to someone, he will be clingy af, orrr suddenly cold af.

Toby doesn't get along with most people, usually sticking around Cody(X-Virus), Eyeless Jack and Kate. Those are his best friends.

His favorite artists are: Mother Mother, Get Scared, Insane Clown Posse, My Chemical Romance, Nirvana, Three Days Grace, Radiohead, Salvia Palth, Linkin Park, Panic! At The Disco, Alex G, Crystal Castles, Mitski, The Neighbourhood, Coldplay, Mindless Self Indulgence, Melanie Martinez, Pastle Ghost and Billie Eilish.

When he finds dead animals like raccoons, he will pick them up and pet them, all fascinated. He might even hug and squeeze it to somehow get comfort from it. The comfort he didn't recieve and needs.

Toby can go from super confident to super insecure very fast.

Toby loves touching things to feel real. If he's feeling surreal, he will start touching things or taste things to feel real.

He struggles with sleeping, but once he actually is asleep, he usually has disturbing nightmares. As soon as Toby wakes up, he either remembers them and has a panic attack OR he will feel uncomfortable for a reason he can't recall and will avoid sleeping as much as possible.

He's emotionally detached, but tbh, he's a real INFP (Personality type).

Habits:

Honestly, he sometimes tries watching porn to feel something. Due to his mania episodes, he tends to be hypersexual. (Again, he's bipolar which causes mania, and mania can cause hypersexuality.)

Tobias keeps chewing the flesh around his fingers, biting the skin on hips lips and pulling on his hair.

When he's nervous, he will fidget with his hands or clothes a LOT, or keep something like a leaf in his hand so he can just play with it instead of harming himself.

If he's pissed, he starts grinding his teeth to focus on the noise and the feeling instead of the anger he's feeling.

Toby sometimes drinks alcohol to just go completely numb, even emotionally. He uses it to escape the pain he's feeling mentally, as soon as he gets his flashbacks.

Routine: His routine might be a little difficult to explain? But I'll try for sure! I hope I'm not getting the commission wrong, if I do, let me know and I will redo this!

When Toby wakes up, the first thing he does is check where he is. He usually skips breakfast or forgets it, but IF he doesn't forget it, he will just devour a toast or something simple like that. When he doesn't have a mission to do, he will just do the most random stuff like go for a walk, play video games, listen to music, etc. Toby doesn't have a specific routine, he just does what he feels like doing. One thing is sure tho: Toby listens to music every day. No matter how many songs, no matter what song. He must listen to at least one song to feel comfortable and connected to reality. Music gives him comfort and he enjoys listening to it, so he listens to music every day. Sometimes he even plays e-guitar! :] He won't do anything special other than killing, listening to music or talking to himself the whole day. As soon as the stars become visible, Toby goes outside to observe them, spending his time by thinking and having conversations with himself. He doesn't usually sleep anyway, so he spends a lot of time caught in his thoughts. Toby usually drinks a lot of energy drinks to not collapse, even tho his hyperactivity usually keeps him awake.

When this insomnaic finally decides to sleep, he places his hatchets somewhere where he can find them again. After making sure his weapons are on their place, he will just straight up jump into bed to pass out. Changing clothes, brushing his teeth or anything related to that isn't a thing Toby likes. I feel like sometimes Toby would plan on meeting people like Kate or Cody behind the mansion to drink a little and smoke, but bro would just straight up forget about it and go to bed like nothing is bothering his life, completely forgetting about the things he planned. Maybe he at least gets a peaceful sleep... or something.

Sorry if it's not THAT much, after finishing the habits and headcanons my brain just stopped working and had no clue what to continue with when it comes to routines. Again, thank you so much for requesting this!! <3

[stuck-on-boops-alt]

so uh litg volume 13 happened..

I still like Hamish, but the spark is gone I'm afraid... I will just blame it on the writing lol

spoilers below and mostly rants, so if you're up for that, read on!

My thoughts on the talent show.. of course it was boring. I just sped through it most of the time. Hamish looked cute with the dog ears, but hhh the dog training part was so weird wtf. I was so shocked like.. 😧😧😧 I mean I think the writers thought it was funny, I guess? I had secondhand embarrassment for Lyn and Hamish, watching it unfold. 😂

The romantic gesture was uh.. it was cute? But.. paper airplanes again?? Really??? And the stuff that LI likes about MC are uh.. I swear they're so banal. I think it was just the merging personality thing because if it was specific for the LI, Hamish's writings on the papers would be something about their whacky shenanigans like the popcorn thing, their random banters and MC being someone that he feels safe to open up to-- not these generic-ass compliments. But yeah, I guess they were lazy to write something that isn't applicable for ALL the LIs 🤷🏻‍♀️

Eddie is still Eddie. I ignored his stinky cheese hair in all the episodes.

Now, I have to talk about the worst part of it all. I don't wanna be fucking reminded of the Sienna thing. It's sooooooo lame. The devs probably thought "oh we're going to make it seem like the s8 thing again where the LI comes in with Sienna BUT the twist is it's actually BELLA who is just the host! No one would expect that! We're going to sUbVeRt their expectations!” All I felt during that part is please get this over with. I don't need this. Get me outta here. End my misery 😭😭😭

Though.. I kinda wish they revealed more about our LI's birth chart. I was actually very curious and that was the only thing that piqued my interest.

Welp.. at least my mc Lyn and Hamish are finally and officially together. That cliffhanger tho ahaha.. just let Lyn say yes already gdi.

It's Season Finale next week. After that, goodbye forever LITG. I still might think about you from time to time. I still might draw something when I get nostalgic, but I will stay away from the game for good.

edit: I forgot to mention that I also hate how they brought Angie into it. What do you mean she and Sienna are besties? SHE WAS MY S4 MC'S BESTIE!! AND SIENNA AS MAID OF HONOUR OVER HER OWN SISTERS??? WHAT DO YOU MEANNN??? Sienna wtf stop stealing everyone. Your birth chart must be so whack 😭

[tia-amorosa]

Sunset Died - Wolff/Sekemoto (long part)

Changes

Early in the morning. Morgana got up quite early. She couldn't sleep for a variety of reasons. . Her husband also noticed that something had somehow changed. "Good morning…"/ "hhh, morning…". A slightly annoyed snort came from Morgana.

Thornton knew his wife quite well, but her behavior was new to him. "Whou, can you tell me what's going on? You've been stressed for days... Is something going wrong at the hospital?"/ "The hospital stresses me out the least, Thornton. At least we can finish the X-ray room today..."/ "O.K., if it's not the hospital, what is it? Maybe because of Pauline? You were a bit grumpy yesterday after she left".

Morgana interrupted the preparation of breakfast for a moment. "hh... I really would have liked to help her, Thornton, but it wouldn't have worked"/ "what's the problem, I could have built another room upstairs, would have been totally easy..."/ "Yes, but... We need the space ourselves..."/ "We have enough"/ "but not for much longer". She could barely look him in the eyes.

Of course, Thornton wasn't completely dumbfounded. What else would you have to make room for in a house if you didn't want a friend to move in? He approached her and looked at her seriously. There was no mistaking her nervousness "Space for what, eh?"/ "well, for... Our own baby... Maybe?".

"Maybe?"/ "No, I… There's a reason why I've been so stressed lately… work is the least of it. I know you've never been ready for this before, and for me… It's a bit unexpected now…"/ "As they say, the unexpected often comes, doesn't it?". She looked at him, almost a little surprised… Because how often was that the topic? Children, no children…

Morgana waited for a reaction and was actually expecting all sorts of things, negative words, him leaving the room without a word. But instead, her husband took her in his arms. "Tell me when you want me to start. Maybe it'll be enough for both tots, then Yumi can sleep longer in the morning." Morgana clung to her husband. But she didn't say anything for a while.

Thornton felt all the tension leave her body. And yet she was still trembling a little. "Hey, it's all right, o.k.? I've had plenty of time to practise with Sam, . Well, Sam's bigger, but… It can't get any worse with a mini human like that"/ "mhm, h-hh, now let me get on with it, okay? Otherwise I'll have to go to work hungry". Thornton took one last look at his wife, smiled and kissed her forehead. After breakfast, she made her way to the hospital.

When Morgana arrived, her colleague was already hard at work again. The anatomy course seems to be very popular with many of the residents. Morgana hadn't told her anything yet. But she also knows that she is being taken off duty because of her pregnancy. That's standard practice for nurses and doctors. But she doesn't want that yet.

Morgana waited until Jamie had finished her demonstration on the skeleton. Then she went to her ... "oh, in civilian clothes today?". Morgana smiled a little. "I didn't have time to change. I have something important to discuss with you."/ "O.K. about the X-ray room? It's as good as ready for use, the generator's there too"/ "then let's go over there and talk for a moment, alright?". Jamie raised her eyebrows. "Must be serious, okay".

The two doctors excused themselves for a moment and went behind the building together. "Listen, I probably won't be able to work in a few months, at least not for a while..."/ "Do you have to go?"/ "Nonsense, where am I supposed to go? Hnhn, no, we're going to be parents"/ Jamie stopped for a moment and looked at her in surprise. "What... you and Thornton?"/ "yeah, or have you ever seen me with anyone else?"

"And... What does your husband say? I mean, he never wanted children..."/ " Haven't you noticed how he treats Sam? At first he was really afraid to touch him, but now he won't let him out of his hands. I told him this morning."/ "And?"/ "He just hugged me... He's never hugged me like that before..."

Jamie stopped and hugged Morgana. "Really, I'm very happy for you and for him too. And I really hope that you two find even more of a connection this way"/ "We did, thank you. Hey, everything's ready. Shall we do a test?"/ "You know, only if we start the thing up and switch it off again straight away"/ "All right. And we have to thank Judy and her husband again, without them this wouldn't be possible".

Jamie switched on the generator, then they both went inside. This machine had already been used in the hospital, although not for very long. So one person stood upright in the X-ray machine while the other did an all-round scan. When she had finished, she switched the machine off again. "This thing is really great! The only thing it can't do is analyze blood"/ "I know, but we're lucky to have it. All right, I'll switch the generator off again.“.

After the check at the x-ray machine was successful, Morgana went to the front of the main building. "Christopher? What are you doing on our PC?"/ "Hey, don't worry, nothing wrong. Jamie asked me to take a look at it,"/ "Oh, probably because of the memory problems"/ "the hard disk is already pretty full, mhm".

"And what can we do?"/ "Well, I can't really find a new laptop. She'll have to get rid of a few files that aren't important"/ "hm, but there's important stuff from the hospital on there"/ "I know... But also some things that this PC really doesn't need. But I'll ask her first"/ "Mhm... and you? You have no business here, sweetie".

"Oh, hello, Connor. We rarely see you either"/ "I know, I'm sometimes here and sometimes there, tomorrow most of us are meeting at the cemetery, there'll be a lot to do"/ "mhm...maybe we'll have you as a colleague soon?"/ "hehe, I don't know, I'm trying my hand at an end-time novel right now"/ "hm, I don't know if I want to read that".

Morgana noticed that Pauline was also visiting the hospital and went straight to her. "Pauline… I'm really sorry about yesterday…"/ "It's all right, I think I know why I couldn't stay with you, you're pregnant too, right?"/ "Yes, how do you know…"/ "hn, we pregnant women probably have a feeling for it. I can stay with Zelda for a while.“.

Morgana smiled sympathetically. "It's nice that she has a place for you. My only regret is that we don't have an ultrasound machine. Otherwise I could check on both of us to see if everything is OK"/ "It will be, Morgana. We have to remember our primal instincts now. Unfortunately, most people have lost them. We relax a lot, I even do yoga now, hnhn"/ "just not too much, okay?".

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

A little later, during Morgana's shift. "Hello VJ, how's your... little problem?"/ "It's much better now, thanks... water is boiled every time now... I still want to return the favor for the help. I'm going hunting later, do you need meat?"/ "um, not just me, some people here would be happy to have a good piece too".

"Excuse me for asking, but do you even know how to gut an animal?". VJ almost felt a little offended by this question. He crossed his arms, raised an eyebrow and replied: "You have to hang it up by the hind legs, then cut it open from the crotch to the throat, take out the innards and bleed it out". Morgana listened to him carefully and pressed her lips together. It was a moment before she said anything again. "OK, there's really nothing more to add. It should just be stored in a cool place as quickly as possible then…".

"hmm, as soon as I sawed up the animal, I just wanted to distribute it quickly among the people…". Morgana tilted her head a little and rolled her eyes "But not everyone has a fridge at the moment, you have to bear that in mind." VJ hadn't thought that far ahead. "Do you have a better suggestion?"/ "hm, a cold room… It doesn't have to be very big. And you need electricity and a well-functioning air conditioning system that could be retrofitted a bit"/ "oh man,… OK, there are cables sticking out of the ground everywhere, electricity wouldn't be a problem".

"Are you going to fiddle with the power cable on your own? Please let other people do it, do you hear me?"/ "If you only knew where I've fiddled around, but if it makes you feel better… OK, I'll look for help. Now if you can tell me where I can get an air conditioner? I haven't seen any at the scrap yard yet". Morgana was at a loss for a moment, but then she had an idea. "hm, I'll have a look in the old hospital grounds later…".

VJ gladly accepted Morgana's help and suggestions. Even if he preferred to do everything on his own. Still, a little help from others wouldn't go amiss. And so he slowly set off to hunt down a wild animal. If he finds one...

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End of this (l-l-long) Part…sorry ^^ the next one will be shorter again, I promise^^

@greenplumbboblover 😊🙂

[livewellpsa]

OOMPA LOOMPAS TAKE NOTES LIKE WIZARDS FROM THE 1300’S!

this is an intro post except.. i dont jnow how to do these kinda thangs LMAO

hi my name is cheese(slice) or nessie or tragedy or mori or archivist or any character I remind you of (PLEASE) or any nicknames you wanna call me i actually genuinely dont care spit yo shit bro!

guess my pronouns. (YES I AM DEAD SERIOUS)

interests: arcadekitten games, scp foundation, backrooms, spooky’s jumpscare mansion, medieval execution methods, inscryption, every horror game ever probably, devotion, detention, object shows, rain world, angel hare, twf, the tangi virus, vita carnis, the smile tapes, urban legends, myths, analogue horror in general, socialstuck/cloutchase, guidestuck, beary the hatchet, racheldrawsthis games, ddlc, little shop of horrors, subway midnight, bonnies bakery, yttd, deathsitter, ghost eyes, tangle tower, hhh blah blah blah there’s more but iiii…cant list them all SOS im into too mnay things!

music: dogbite, mommy long legs, the scary jokes, machinery of the human heart, self, weird al, that handsome devil, MOOK, brn1ng brain sound industries, bo burnham (i do not tolerate his actions), fiona apple, jhariah, vane lily, riproducer, wolf alice, the spook school, black dresses, caravan palace, lil mariko, of montreal, slipknot, any classical music, mother mother, rory in early 20s, goreshit (dont tolerate either), tv girl, ajj, poppy, will wood, they might be giants, jack off jill, babymetal, rio romeo, weatherday, the stupendium, afain theres more but im not listing allat i listen to too much music

i. misspell stuff a lot AND TEND TO USE ALL CAPS LIKE THIS i am not shouting at you i just get very veru excited very very easily And sometimes I capitalise Random words like This because jts pretty fun :^3 also k am a :^) :^( :^D :^3 user

dni basic criteria

IM MAGNIFICUS FROM INSCRYPTION AND PROFESSOR POINTER FROM TANGLE TOWER’S WIFE!!!

im also the archivist from inscryption trust

oooo you wanna be friends ekth me sooo bad oo o o oooooo /nf (feel free to medsage me, :^D)

[ofcowardiceandkings]

mmh thing because of dad poll

this is such a nearly 5 am post lol

hhh i feel a little odd about my relationship with my parents sometimes because yknow its ... strsnge

ive reflected on it a lot since i was a lot younger as well and its very complicated but like .. ive known for a good long while that im far more emotionally mature and diplomatic than them both lmao

like ... i love them both and ive not got a truly negative relationship with either of them but sometimes its a little hard not to feel exasperated with their antics. i know WHY theyre like this, they both have a lot of trauma and baggage, but i feel like they dealt with it in a less than productive way for various reasons .. and ive tried to help them multiple times as well but at this point ive washed my hands of the matter because it just doesnt work , id much rather see them happier but you cant help people who dont want to help themselves

i dont wanna go into huge amounts of depth or air out their nonsense, but it explains a lot lol ... one being a csa survivor who had kids very young but doesnt actually like young children much at all, and still has problems with stubbornness and accountability/consequences and anger/patience .. and the other losing his mother very young, working in a new industry through connections very young (but thoroughly enjoying it) only to be shat out the other end with no recourse or way forward, losing his brother to a family drama related murder (yes really), and falling into alcoholism very much like his mother and other lost industry friends (he doesnt have many friends at all now), then having a minor stroke and losing memories words and personality traits, while also not wanting to bother people with his own feelings ?? plus neither set of grandparents was exactly perfect .... its a c c c combo ... both of them are sort of shut-ins especially my dad and i suspect if we lived further away from my maternal family my mum wouldnt do much either

and the bickering drives me nuts lol moving out was the best thing i did for my own wellbeing its VERY hard not to snap back at them sometimes like IM the parent

im not bitter either about how they definitely contributed to my anxiety disorder, they acknowledge it as well so its not a Big Issue and even though its shit i feel like its made me a more considerate person than i could have been. im generally not .. bitter its not really the right word ,, nor is sour either ? but at least on my end i feel a little melancholy about it all

id very much like to help but theres only so much attention i have to give on encouraging people who usually dont want to hear it when im dealing with my own shit

idk its .. strange

but like just fucking go to therapy jfskdjskdj jesus

anyway

yeah

[gglitchshit]

omg hi, I didn't know you before today but please give me as many of the numbers from the gw2 ask game for gliaster as you want. I am fascinated.

HIII finally after more than half a year. I am here. With all of the numbers. Thank you so much for the ask and the interest in my lil rat. 🥺❤

GW2 ASK MEME 3: Back and worse-er than ever (accepting still I guess. Just slow.)

Putting it under a readmore because. Long. (Also cw for some animal cruelty mentions, dark topics implication and the usual spoilers for LWS4E3 long live the lich~)

1.) Your character is now the leader of their species, whatever that looks like for them (Arcane Councilmember, Imperator, Royalty, etc). How do they govern and what sorts of changes would they make if any?

They would certainly reform education in some way. That's all I can think of rn... :')

2.) What class would your character just absolutely blow at?

(CW: Animal cruelty)

Ranger. They would use any and all animals they find/come across for some kind of fucked up experiment. None of them would stay alive.😞

3.) What person impacted them the most?

*Shows a picture of them surrounded by 500 Joko statues. Surprisingly.*

*Coughs* Anyway, yeah, the moment the asura first learned about Joko in a corner of a library, the impact was made. Gliaster cares about nothing but necromancy and seeing that there was this powerful lich out there was just the cataclysm of everything. Like a god. That man was so otherworldy for Gliaster in everything, even decades later they can't let go of him. Ever.

4.) Assuming they're a commander, how close were they really to Destiny's Edge? To Trahearne?

5.) What would they look like as the side character in someone else's story?

IDK I can only think of as a trope, like in general. Cuz yeah they're kind of a side character for Joko but it's Complicated.

Anyway, they would be the type of side character that's like always around in the background, kind of like as a running gag. Not even them personally always but like a picture of them. Just always there in the corner of your eyes... Always watching.....

6.) They're now a heart NPC/part of a string of quests. What does that involve?

Hhh I have way too many ideas for this. One that would be similar to the Vabbi heart at the Necropolis (Help the living and the dead at the Necropolis) with processing and honoring the dead but also one where they're in Tyria in disguise (they're a wanted criminal in there so gotta be careful lol) spreading Joko propaganda which would be just the opposite of a heart in Ebonhawke. 😭 (Help the people in Ebonhawke). I'm sooo original.

Something other I can think about is some generic asura stuff helping around the lab or with experiments, possibly again involving animal cruelty or even worse, but I already wrote a similar heart for Rikka. 😞

7.) Do they have any skills or abilities that their class wouldn't normally have/just go about their class differently in some kind of way?

Ohhh boy yes they do. 😈 So, they're a necromancer, but with some sub-abilities similar to other classes/specializations' abilities.

For example they CAN "manifest sand shade" like an in-game scourge, but it's actually sand manipulation. They can use sand to lift or carry objects, for example caskets or even themself. They like to make themself taller this way hehe.

They can also summon fire in/around their left hand due to a Djinn's blessing, but can only use it as a light source and can't attack with it.

But most importantly, and also the most powerful of them all, they can manipulate other living beings' blood in their veins, essentially controlling them like puppets. This costs great energy though, so they only use it as a last resort. Later however, when they themself become a lich, this limitation ends and this becomes their main way of practicing necromancy.

8.) How willing are they to bend/break the rules for their cause (be it selfless or otherwise)?

They will literally commit murder for it so yes, very willing.

9.) What's an AU for them you think could be fun to explore?

I do have two AU ideas... one of them fun, one of them just fucked up (and fun. for me.)

The fun: Inquest AU sort of, but so far it's only in the Mists because Inquest member Gliaster is my WvW toon, and haven't really explored it much. Only fashion-wise. Yet.

The fucked up: An AU where Joko somehow has remains. For Gliaster to keep to themself and do whatever with it. And probably prevent any future tragedies that exist in their main verse because of this... :') Exploring dark/taboo sides of my OCs like my life depends on it...

10.) Would/does knowing their backstory change how people (in general but also Tyria at large) view them?

Probably not, it's not like they have a tragic backstory and that's why they are "evil", why they like necromancy or are siding with Joko. Even when they become a lich and seek revenge against Aurene and the Commander, their past doesn't really redeem them.

11.) How accurate is their reputation/image compared to how they really are?

Quite accurate. They don't really show a fake image and are very honest. Their reputation is basically "murderous traitor" in Tyria and "weird little cruel guy who's also Joko's lover" in Elona, so yep.

12.) Have they "completed" the map? What does that look like in your canon?

In-game they do have full map completion of core Tyria and every other map as well because they're my main and I do every story with them, but in canon... A bit of here and there in core Tyria. They used to have a travelling era before they permanently moved to Elona. But they surely have the Crystal Desert and Elona "completed." But they don't explore every tiny bit of areas like how it is done sometimes in-game to get map completion.

13.) What is the worst/funniest/dumbest article that could be written about them in Tyria's trashiest gossip mag?

In Tyria...some big dumb lie of how they betrayed and murdered the Priory excavation team on their way to Elona. People would blow it out of proportion for sure.

Then in Elona.....people would probably distastefully curious and disgusted about their sexual life with Joko.

14.) Biggest misconception about them?

Not quite a misconception but their looks are quite misleading; they're small and have quite a high pitched voice. Probably nobody would assume from first sight that this little creature tortures and murders people on the regular. First, for science/knowledge, then in Joko's name, and later, their own satisfaction.

15.) What is their favorite and least favorite part of being the commander (or whatever role they play in your canon)?

While they enjoy the privilege of being close to Joko, they also love the luxuries that come with it. What they don't like...hmmm...Head empty no thoughts, so nothing comes to mind, but might edit later if I think of something. :^D

[brick-a-doodle-do]

Serenity Split au questions!!!

Okay so you probably won’t answer this because spoilers (I will ask despite this tho lol) but what happens when everyone does find out about what Tommy is?

And are there others from the over-world in the mortal realm doing what Tommy’s doing right now too that he knows? And if yes, are they able to recognise each other? Or even if he doesn’t know them can over world people recognise their own kind on the mortal plains?

And what do the tasks consist of? Like I know h d gotta get items and stuff but how obscure can some of the items be?

And when he gets them: what happens to the items? Do they just like sit in a box or does he like use a magic quill or something a mark an item with a symbol that makes it disappear??? Like what happens when he’s got an item or completed a task that Tommy knows he’s got the right thing?

And big big big question! Who finds out about Tommy first 👀 because I did some searching of the tags and I think I know who it is but idk lol. I’m also confused why Tommy would threaten to Dream about telling Techno something so very confused and intrigued!!

OKAY THANKS FOR ANSWERING HAVE THESE 🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭

SERENITYYYYYYYYY LETS GOOOOOO I'M SO EXCITED FOR THESE QUESTIONS IDEM THE SPOILERS >:DD THANK U SMSM BECKY :DDDD

i will say that i plan for a total of five people to know about him, and eventually they all just get over the shock and end up helping him. some take longer than others tho 👀

there could be! you never know. :)

and yes they would be able to recognize each other, purely from their features. i've not entirely figured it out and somehow forgot to mention it but tommy's wings come back in after he gets his first task, just to give him a lil boost. but for some reason i haven't figured out yet, if you haven't been to the overworld you can't see them. so only one other person (plus dream) can see them! which actually leads to the first reveal !!

the tasks are pretty different! there is only one that can be found in the mortal realm. all the other ones can be found in other realms! (remember there are four well-known realms. there are others!)

the tasks are generally like some type of plant or something hard to get, just to prove tommy's loyalty and determination with things. and his strength. yk,,,

well apart from them getting stolen once, he keeps them on his desk after he gets them. after that incident he keeps them somewhere more secure! hhh i like the idea of a symbol i will definitely use that. if you still remember the paper and pencil i mentioned, both of them are inflicted with some type of magic that can take it to the overworld, and i'll use your symbol idea so he can mark it and have it get sent. THANK YOU :D and btw dream just takes them whenever he has the time to. he kinda illegally visits tommy using the whole like "guardian angel" type feature the overworld has, hence the hurt/comfort fic i showed u!

tommy knows he's gotten the right thing because it's on a slip of paper, generally telling him of the location and a tiny description of it. sometimes it comes in like a poem form tho that could possibly mislead him!

hmm u really want me to spoil that? wasjdgsjd im jk it's rlly not that big. techno is! tommy goes digging around an old ancient place and finds a book titled "memory", which he sees it's for recovering a persons memory, and he tries it on techno, just because a question had been nagging on him and he wanted the answer. techno looks eerily similar to an old warrior & deity, "blade" (i'll come up with a more creative name i promise) turns out he is. and then cause of the recovered memory he can see tommy's wings since he's been to the overworld and boooom yeah

i honestly am having a hard time deciding whether or not techno should be actual family to phil & wil or not, i'm considering having him be a neighborhood friend that just hangs around, like w/ soot house. either way would work,,,,

you stalked my tags for the answer?? :0 i'm curious, who was your guess??

i don't think i'm entirely following what u said in the last bit but maybe i'm not looking at it right,,,

as apology for not, have this: ghostbur is canon in this! twice, actually. two entirely separate occasions :)

TY FOR THE LOLLIPOPS AND THANK U MORE FOR THESE QUESTIONS I'M HAPPY YOU'RE LIKING SERENITY!!! i hold this fic so close to my heart :D

[muslim1ummah]

If Everything is Predestined, What is our Fault?

Many Muslims are often confused about predestination. In fact, they have little knowledge about fate, Allah has made it obligatory to believe in fate, if one does not believe, he will no longer be a Muslim. Atheists target these ignorant Muslims and confuse them with questions. We will InshAllah answer some of their confused questions.

What is Predestined (Taqdeer)? hhh

Belief in destiny is an integral part of information. By general fate we are ourselves destiny, bad luck, luck, forehead, fate etc. As the saying goes, who can destroy fortune? Belief in destiny is an integral part of information. By general fate we are ourselves destiny, bad luck, fate, luck, forehead, fate, destiny etc. As the saying goes, who can destroy fortune? Qadr is the root word of Taqdeer. Qadr or Qadrun means – understanding, measure, measure, assessment, fixed limit, valuation, blind, destiny, fate etc.

Is everything predestined by God? 

Yes, everything is predestined, Allah Ta’ala has written everything about Him 50,000 thousand years before His creation. For example, if a person is written before creation, he will be good or bad, he will be rich or poor, he will be short or tall, how much food and water he will take, how many times he will take breath, how many years, how many days, It is written about how many minutes and seconds he will live, he will not go to heaven, he will go to hell, etc. But here is one thing, Allah has written that you will not do bad or good deeds. Rather, Allah Ta’ala is the most knowledgeable, He is the creator of the past and the future, He knows everything, so He knows what you will do and wrote it, it is His power. A good side for us in this is to face him through good and bad and be grateful to him. And always fearing and hoping and asking for forgiveness. I am giving an example, suppose the class teacher told some boys of his class that you will fail and another boy said that you will get good results, now you answer whether this teacher will pass or fail on purpose?

Some Atheist’s Misguided Questions About Fate and Their Answers

     1. Nothing will happen outside of what God has written in fate. So what do I need to try?

Let us understand the answer to this question through a story. Think of a class. There is a teacher and many students in that class. At the end of the semester, the time for the final exam was approaching. As the teacher knew all his students very well, he challenged and said – I know exactly which student will get which grade. Not just verbally – he even wrote it down on a piece of paper – so-and-so will get an A+, so-and-so will get an A, so-and-so will fail, etc. The students have no idea what the teacher has written on the paper. Each of them gave their own test. Examination booklets are checked as per marking scheme. Then it turned out – one! The grade that the teacher wrote about the student on the paper, he got exactly that grade! The teacher’s knowledge of the student was so perfect that he did not make a single point of error in estimating the grades. Think about it, in this situation no student can come and say – I got that grade because the teacher had already written the grade. Because, the grade that the teacher had written earlier – it did not affect the exam result at all. Students no longer knew who would get what grade. So, the one who got A+ got A+ by studying on his own, and the one who failed failed because he didn’t study on his own.

Since Allah is “Al-Aleem” or All-Knowing, He is fully aware of everything past, present, and future. Allah knows when what will happen, who will be born, who will marry, how much money will be, where will any accident happen, what illness will happen, who will die, who will go to heaven, who will go to hell – all this is known to Allah. There is nothing unknown to Allah. Allah knows what will happen in the future, what will not happen, what will not happen or what will happen – everything. And he has written this information in a book called “Laohe Mahfuz”. Who wrote for? for us To make us understand that, O mankind, try, make du’a, but don’t strain. No matter how chaotic and uncontrollable you think the world around you is – nothing is happening outside of God’s sight, everything good and bad is happening because God is allowing it to happen.

Document : Sura yeah sin ayat 12

     2. Wait, do you mean to say that so much lawlessness and torture is happening in the world because of God’s will? I do all the sins that I do for the will of Allah? Then why will people be punished for sin in the afterlife? People are not doing everything according to God’s will?

Everything that happens in this universe – be it a natural phenomenon, wrongdoing, evil or good – is all by Allah’s permission. Not even a leaf falls from a tree without Allah’s permission . Whatever we want to do, Allah allows it to happen. But just because Allah has given us the freedom to do something, we should not do it. It is our duty to do those things which Allah and His Messenger (PBUH) have made Fard/Wajib, and to refrain from those which they have made Haraam.

Let’s take the exam hall example again. Suppose – the teacher is taking the MCQ type exam. There are 50 questions in the exam, each question has 4 possible answers, out of which only one answer is correct. Now, if the teacher wanted, instead of giving these 50 questions in the exam, he could have asked completely different 50 questions. Or, he could have changed the possible answers given in the current question paper and given different answers. That is, the teacher has complete control over what will be given in the exam paper. When a student writes an answer he has to choose one of the possible answers given by the teacher, he cannot go beyond these possible answers even if he wants to – that is the rule of the exam. So, what the student can answer depends on the teacher’s question. Similarly, Allah gives each person different choices in life. We cannot go beyond those choices even if we want to.

Now imagine: During the exam, the teacher himself visits the hall and observes the condition of the students. While walking around, the teacher noticed that a student was choosing the wrong answer. Now if the teacher wants to stop the student immediately and say – “This throw! You are giving the wrong answer!”, can even take away the notebook. But he did nothing like that and let the student choose the wrong answer. Why? Because, if you tell the answer during the exam, it does not mean to take the exam. After the exam, the student submitted the report card. Now what should happen is: The teacher will check the book according to the marking scheme. Give points for correct answers, no points for wrong answers. But, if the teacher decides to check the notebook very liberally, giving marks for almost correct answers, then no one will have anything to say. In the same way, Allah allows people to commit injustice in the world. If all injustice is stopped by Allah, then who is good or bad among people – how will this test be? The world is not a place to get results, the world is a place of testing, and the results of this testing will be available in the hereafter.

So from the exam hall example we can understand – a student’s exam paper is completely under the teacher’s control, while he is writing the answer whether he can finish writing it at all depends on the teacher’s will. After submitting the exam book, the result is also under the control of the teacher. That is, the teacher is in full control over the entire process of taking the test. A student’s freedom is only to fulfill the goals of the MCQ – and he will be marked according to the goals he fulfills. Now if the student fails then who is responsible? The answer will be – the student is responsible. He was given the opportunity by the teacher to choose the wrong answer for the test – but the teacher didn’t want him to fail at all.

Similarly, Almighty Allah gives us some choices at every stage of life, Allah is completely in control of what these choices will be. We don’t choose what we like from those choices. God is controlling the outcome of that choice. It is natural that people will be burnt to death if they jump into the fire, but Allah willed it so Ibrahim (A) did not burn in the fire. It is natural that a person will die if a knife is stabbed in the throat, but Allah did not want it, so Ibrahim (A) did not die even after stabbing the throat of his son. Choices and their consequences are not ours to answer for in the afterlife, they are beyond our control. We have to answer for which choice we choose.

Document: Sura Al- Anaam 59

    3. Well brother, I understand everything, everything is under the control of Allah. But, if he is so powerful over everything, then why is he not stopping the injustice and oppression in the world? Couldn’t he have created a world where there would be no injustice?

For your information, the world that you are talking about without injustice and oppression has been created by God long ago – that is the world of angels. Angels do not disobey Allah, do not commit sins, and therefore do not fall into any wrongdoing. Almighty God has created man in such a way that man will commit sin, do injustice and torture – this is the perfect model of man’s creation. That people do bad things is a by-product of a special human trait. That special feature is – “power to choose”. Since no existence other than Allah is above error, if Allah gives any existence the power to choose, it will err. That is why when Allah Almighty said to the angels that I will send my khalifa (man) on earth they said – “Will you send someone who will commit corruption and murder?” Why did the angels say that? Because one of the meanings of the word “Khalifa” is one who does not listen to the words of others, who is free-willed, who has the power to make his own choices. And if the existence with the “power to choose” is not above mistakes, it will make mistakes, in terms of which it will prevent chaos.

There is another great benefit in allowing people to sin. Angels cannot sin, so they cannot ask Allah for forgiveness. But, people commit sins and seek forgiveness from Allah because they commit sins. And Allah the Exalted is Gafur, Gaffar – Most Forgiving. He can forgive more sins than man can commit. He not only forgives, He loves to forgive. And so the selfishness of human creation is hidden in man’s sinning and asking for forgiveness. It is through sin and forgiveness that people get God’s love, come to God.

Document: Al Baqarah

    4. No matter what you say brother, there is so much injustice and oppression in the world and Allah is not doing anything, it cannot be accepted. Right?

We Muslims believe that there is something good in the end of every injustice, every tyranny that happens in the world. Maybe we can see that good thing in this world, or we can’t. But, on the Day of Judgment, God will make clear to us the events behind every event in this world, the next event. Allah will settle the account of everything in the Hereafter. On that day there will be no dissatisfaction in anyone’s heart – the one who will go to Paradise will not have any dissatisfaction in his heart, even the one who will go to Hell will surely understand that Hell is his abode. Just as a book of 100 pages cannot be judged by reading 10 pages, in the same way one cannot judge the whole course of life by looking at some of the injustices and atrocities that happen in life. When we take our baby for vaccination, he looks shocked and asks – How is this cruel doctor causing me so much pain in front of my parents? But at that moment we parents feel a reverse gratitude towards the doctor. Because we know this temporary pain will lead our child to long-term wellness. Similarly, a Muslim has full faith in Allah Almighty in all times, good and bad. He knows that through this temporary suffering, Allah may be removing a greater danger, forgiving our sins, testing our patience, preparing us for a good reward, or separating the Muslims from the hypocrites (http://quran.com/3/154). . The way people are blinded by their greed for worldly possessions despite the fear of despair-pain, sudden accidents, sudden attacks of deadly diseases, death at any moment, if it were not for all these suffering-causing things in the world, then human greed would easily have reached any level. presumably

  5.  Last question, if Allah knows everything, why is there a need to take so many tests in the world? Is it possible to send people directly to heaven and hell?

If a teacher says to a student in the exam hall – “I know you are a bad student, so I will not give you the exam questions, you got an “F”, now you go home”. Even if the student is the worst student in the class, will he accept it? No, he would like to take a chance by taking the test. Allah knows who will go to heaven and who will go to hell but we don’t know anymore. So Allah sent us to test in this world. Two angels are writing down everything we do. On the day of judgment, when the exam book will be brought before us and the marking will be held along the lines – then pass and fail, no one will have anything to complain about.

One name of Allah is “Al-Khaliq” or the Creator. So he loves to make beautiful things. That is why he created man, created the universe, created angels, created heaven and hell. Almighty Allah does His works step by step, He likes thoughtfulness, not haste. So He created the universe in six days instead of in one moment. In the same way, He does not catch people immediately for their sins, but gives them time until death so that they cannot go to the Hereafter and say – “Allah, you have not given me enough opportunities”.

Narrated by Anas Ibn Malik (RA). The Prophet (peace be upon him) said that on the Day of Resurrection a person will be brought who lived a life of comfort and abundance on earth but will now be an inhabitant of Hell. This man will be plunged into the fire of hell only once and will be asked: O son of Adam! Did you get any peace or any wealth (in the world)? He will answer: By Allah! No, he is my Lord!

And then a person will be brought who is a dweller in Paradise but who lived the most miserable life on earth. This man will be immersed in Paradise only once and will be asked: O Son of Adam! Were you in any trouble (in the world)? He will say: By Allah! No, he is my Lord! I have never faced any hardships in the world or fallen into any misery. – (Sahih Muslim)

Read More: The proof of one God and the refutation of the Christian lie of trinitarianism.

[seoafin]

Hello Morgan :) I just read chapters 1 & 2 of Dog days are over and .. xhsbacbksdjcb it was so good I have become incoherent. hence why - -- hhhh .... when i .. when he- when. they. hhh .. .... when- the mc- ....

Wah, I can't even find the words to describe how enamoured I am of it. Stsg? ? Forget about them .. Who are they anyways. Irrelevant. I am instead giving you and rip!mc flowers (if you want them, or any little gift you want!) .. Mc .. she deserves the world. i mean these three words, i do. Stsg are so annoying honestly. I would fall for her face first. The way you do with that one high school friend you have a very queer friendship with .. oddly specific but yeah I love her sm LMAOO. And you !! You deserve to get *all* the love you put in your works back tenfold and more for your wonderful writing, Morgan!!

I have already sent a few asks full of compliments on anon but tbh I would repeat what I said word by word as many times as it's needed. This fic alone is a lot of work from all points of view, and I want to let you know I personally am grateful for the chance to read it .. It's enriching (I hope this is an actual english word lol) and it's pleasant to read; the universe you created is vibrant .. realistic as in immersive and (sometimes painfully) relatable, especially the mc - she feels so human and I think I can say I relate and have related to her, which is a little sad - but reading it also feels comforting (i believe that truly is the unifying potential of fanfic and writing in general).

There are so many things i could say about these two chapters but i think i'll leave them for AO3 comments (didn't someone say tumblr asks are temporary but ao3 comments are permanent?). Rn I just want to focus on how beautifully outlined rip!mc's feelings are. The loneliness .. The image of a single mother and her kid in her apartment .. Her thinking about her future (woah, that one hurt. in a good way though) and the prospect of being left behind .. I've been going through quite strange times (& writing sad stuff? idk why it is, is it the strange weather?) so that passage was kind of the nail in the coffin, the final blow for me - but in a good, cathartic way, i promise!! (also. i loved "nail in the coffin" - i hope i got the title right. it did something to me. my dirty mind couldn't stop thinking about the way geto stole mc's panties mainly because i have too many [redacted] geto thoughts and that includes panty taking. but this is just a side note.) (and gojo. the leash line. i think, in that, me and mc are different because i would've said yes in the blink of an eye - yeah that's concerning of me but everyone has their flaws right??. lol. the "what do you want" "everything" exchange. i don't think i'll ever recover. in a good way).

When i find something i like this much I think I'd need a 10k word frame minimum to analyze and dissect it over and over .. so I'll stop rambling for everyone's safety 😂. But yeah, I hope this silly comment gives you back even an ounce of the warmth your writing gives me (& i'm sure i'm not the only one)!! and please don't feel obligated at all to respond to this. I just really wanted to say these things :)). i hope you have a good day !

hi friend!!!!! can i just say how much i was smiling reading this because i was SMILING so hard my friend thought i was texting a man (as if please lmfao) everyone being so nice and encouraging about this fic is going to make me cry. like i was not kidding when i said that this fic was loved into existence because i had no intention of actually writing an actual fic for them!!! but im doing it!!! because everyone is so enthusiastic about it!!! im glad u and many others enjoy rip!mc because the amount of self sabotage in this fic....i need to endear her to everyone LOL

this ask gave me so much serotonin never apologize for sending it in!!!!! if anything have me back warmth and happiness in SPADES. thank you so so soo much for reading <3333 i hope u have such an amazing wonderful bright day 😭😭😭 once again i am so touched that you liked the fic enough to write me this wonderful ask 😭😭😭

[aintitfierce]

what do you think makes your oc unique? what qualities do you and your oc have in common? what makes you and your oc different? does your oc have any quirks or habits?

some OC asks | accepting

what do you think makes your oc unique?

well, i’ve certainly gathered that his speaking style makes him stick out laughs in truth, i don’t delve too deeply into the fandomless OC side of things, so i haven’t seen very many OCs in general, but especially not many who are gods. monsters, creatures, Unknowable Entities, yes, and that might be splitting hairs thinking emoji

i think his place as an ancient but comically minor god is kind of unique. he has no tragic fall from grace in his backstory, either— he was always this minor from birth. there’s no suspicious memory loss; he wasn’t booted out of a more coveted position by another god or something. he is just very Small and Old

i do feel that he has probably a lot of familiar characterization tropes (tho what character doesn’t?) but i also hope maybe in combinations that make him feel Unique, aha. he’s vain and selfish and thinks himself much more clever than he is, and has been shown as much many times in the past and still never learns his lesson. his specific brand of immortality is Unnatural even among his fellow gods

what qualities do you and your oc have in common?

well we’re both babies when it comes to the potential for pain, i’ll tell you that much lmao in my case it turns out despite that i seem to have a high tolerance for pain, it’s just the Anxiety of anticipating it that gets to me hhh. in vanya’s case, i feel like his tolerance is also probably Low, and he will cry pitifully if you cut his nail a little too close to the quick u_u;

never mind that he badgered you into cutting it for him in the first place, how could you do this to him

what makes you and your oc different?

i honestly don’t know that we have a lot in common, tbh laughs one of the most glaring differences probably is that he is utterly focused on himself and his own wants, to the point that the outside world really only plays into things when it has something he Wants. he’s fickle and scattered and. well. i’m not Usually like that ghhfie

i’m a stubborn thing, and very patient, and i tend to continue on trying to methodically and meticulously Solve something long after i probably should have given up the ghost lmao vanya can be stubborn and patient, when obtaining what he wants at that time calls for it, but he’s also likely to lose interest before seeing it through thinking emoji

does your oc have any quirks or habits?

does his speaking style count? i know i already mentioned it once but it is part of what makes him fun for me to write ghhfieo i once referred to him as ‘grammatically-challenged’ but the truth is he is absolutely capable of constructing “normal” sentences. he doesn’t refer to himself in the third person bc his grasp of language is Iffy but bc constantly reminding everyone who and what he is feels more important, more satisfying. and he can’t refer to himself as ‘the pretty vanya creature’ and then use ‘I’ bc people will think the pretty vanya creature is Someone Else and that would kill him rip

he’s an emotional creature, and he uses made-up words (or made-up forms of real words) and rearranges sentences in order to make them feel more urgent or Pretty to him (hence why he also tends to neglect contractions). he uses words like “biggestly” and “thrump” bc they make sense to him and convey what he intends them to while making use of his relatively limited vocab thinking emoji

[sohnric]

okay first of all i cried when i got this reblog i kid you not duckie i- 😭😭 i dont think u realize how much this means to me since i admire you as a writer quite a lot hhh but anyways

first of all i need to say that i am the younger sister that had to hang out with her brother's friends growing up <3 also yes i did have a crush on my brothers friend too but it sadly never worked out (jk he was 4 years older so thats actually a good thing LMAO)

this fic really is just me being so delusionally in love with eric and assigning him every specific love language that i go crazy over like SHARING HEADPHONES ??? i died a little when i was writing that

you really predicted the ending right at the start how could you- HHH glad you enjoyed the tough love sibling dynamic i created for sunwoo

THE POOL SCENE THE POOL SCENE I WAS TEARING MY HAIR OUT WRITING THAT like the image of half naked eric w water driplets all over him is just ingraved into my head i was TRYING to keep it tame w the descriptions

"he feels so safe and like a hug as a person" you GET IT you get it. for this reason only i refuse to ever write eric angst he is my hug and my sunshine golden retriever boy he can do no wrong ever

AHHH DUCKIE I AM GRINNING SO MUCH RN AT READING YOUR THOUGHTS LIKE U DONT GET IT UGH

sad to announce april is actually the superior month but anyways-

THE NOVEMBER SCENE IS ACTUALLY MY FAV LIKE THE DIALOGUE THE SILENT CONFESSION THATS LIKE BRUSHED OFF BY THE BOTH OF THEM BC THEY ARE BOTH KINDA DENSE ??? ugh glad someone felt about it the same way as i did

the december scene was the one that inspired this whole fic hhh :,) glad u think the world building is good bc i legit felt like this fic wasn't enough 90s vibes to be 90s au but now i feel validated!!! wouldn't have done it without my obsession with 2521, my fav christmas movie from the 90s and this one czech tv show that's set in the 90s *sighs dramatically* i was born in the wrong generation

he is so boyfriend in this whole fic like he's not the boyfriend but he kind of acts like one anyways. keeping your pic in his wallet is the most romantic thing a man can do fight me like i didnt know i was so cheesy and romantic before being an eric stan somebody euthanize me

you and me both w the friend groups :(( ugh i wish i could give u a very warm hug

I WONT BE SCARED AGAIN I PROMISE its just the first fic always feels so scary to post idk TT but ugh i appreciate this a whole lot and i will definitely look back at this reblog whenever i feel like my writing sucks again to give myself some encouragement. i am SO happy you liked my fic and took time out of your day to read it :,) my fics are more often than not just vibes and slice of life and NO plot but glad u liked it nonetheless <33

you can thank my older brother for the authentic sibling dynamic its all personal experience (my brother said we were "playing karate" just so he could trick me into fighting me my poor 8 year old self was too guillable)

once again thank you so much for everything duckie i hope u dont mind me replying with a long ass reblog as well HAHA i just. :,) treasure this a lot. ily

millennium bug – e. sohn

pairing: eric sohn x fem! reader

genre: 90s au, twenty-five twenty-one au, brother's best friend au, childhood friends au, fluff, slice of life, coming of age. older brother! sunwoo. essentially just eric being baek yijin. oct-nov scenes inspired by weak hero class 1. no plot just vibes im sorry

warnings: minimal swearing and thats all lol

word count: 19k

a/n: posting a fic for a new fandom is always so scary pls be nice to me deobiblr bc im literally abt to cry. also yes i am calling this a 2521 au bc the plot is so heavily inspired it might just be one. a special thank you goes out to @csenke for dragging me into stanning this group i am enjoying myself 🤞

there are some pros and cons to not having friends growing up. cons: you're always forced to tag along with your brother and his group wherever he goes. pros: his childhood best friend is kind of hot.

JUNE OF 1999

Being Kim Sunwoo’s younger sister is no bed of roses sometimes.

Sure, you get the occasional excitement of having him bring you rollerskating with you down the hill or the ever so rare moments of him defending you in front of your mother when you two have done something wrong (while never saying he was in on the bad act as well, of course), but more than often, you are met with his disgusted looks and insults whenever the two years older boy passes by your room and casually bangs at the door just to spite you.

His snarky looks are especially ones to remember. Maybe it’s because he offers them to you often– much like in this very moment, completely unprovoked, and completely not by your fault.

“But mum–”

“I already told you, Sunwoo,” your mother looks at him with a stern look in her eye, the one that makes chills run down your spine, “you can go if you take Y/N with you.”

“But nobody’s bringing their sister! Mum, come on–”

“Take it or leave it, young man.”

And see, your brother may be 19 years old, but he’s still in need of getting permission to leave the house if it includes an overnight stay. It’s an unspoken rule he always follows, since he’s usually granted the right to leave, but the result of his conversation was different than what he expected this time. And see, you may be just two years younger than him (one year left until you are an adult), but even though your mother is too busy to take care of you and entertain your slowly adultling self on most days because of her highly demanding job, she always makes sure that you don’t stay alone for long, and that’s exactly why (you realize, contrary to your brother) she insists on making you tag along on Sunwoo’s trip to the beach house with his friends.

The male grunts and turns on his heel, not giving your mother another response– and with this, you know she won. And that means you’ll have to pack your bag soon, because you know that there’s no way Sunwoo would miss going to the beach house with his friends– even if it meant making his little sister tag along.

And sure enough, Lee Juyeon’s minivan pulls up into your driveway only a few hours later, and the sound of the honking outside is enough for your older brother to aggressively drag you outside of the house, shutting the door behind you and hollering an angry “Bye mum!” to your mother. Your figure is handled with the least amount of care possible as you’re thrown towards the white van, the door opened and 5 heads already peeking out with expecting eyes, waiting for your brother’s arrival.

“My mum made my stupid sister go with me, so I hope we have space for one more,” Sunwoo huffs as he throws his bag into the trunk, slamming it with more force than was necessary (boy does he know how to throw a scene), an encouraging voice of none other than Juyeon– the driver himself– landing in your ear. 

“Sure, just hop in!”

With that, your feet finally unglue themselves off the ground and bring you into the vehicle. You’re familiar with his friends– since a scenario like this hasn’t happened for the first time and you had to spend your fair time with Sunwoo’s circle growing up, mainly because you never really had many friends yourself. You’re not close with any of them, though, and you’re sure you haven’t seen half of them for ages. 

Lee Juyeon is the responsible one of the group. You’re comfortable with the fact that he’s the driver, since you’re not entirely sure if you’d trust any of the other men in this space behind the wheel (you fear the day your brother gets a driver’s license. You'd bet a million dollars that he’ll die while driving recklessly one day). Next to him on the passenger’s seat is Choi Chanhee, his best friend, carrying a map in his hands and twirling it in all possible directions to get his friend on the right track. In the three-seat behind those two is Ju Haknyeon, Ji Changmin and your brother himself, and in the very back of the whole van, almost in the trunk, you’re sat next to Eric Sohn– your brother’s childhood best friend.

“Hi guys,” you offer a greeting to all of them, settling into the uncomfortable leather seat (that’s peeling off, just by the way), watching as the rest of the men pay you no mind and ignore your voice, falling into a comfortable conversation with each other.

Sighing, because this always happens– your brother gets too annoyed because he has to bring you with him all the time, and you imagine his friends aren’t fond of the fact either– you settle deeper into the seat and cross your hands on your chest, looking outside of the window. You can’t imagine enjoying your trip now, since you feel like you’re a nuisance, a child they have to take care of (yes, it embarrasses you just the tiniest bit, you have to admit. Although, you do enjoy getting out of the house from time to time), and the fact that your feelings were probably more than justified and also true has you pouting, an unsatisfied feeling weighing at your lungs.

“Hi,” a voice resonates from your side, the sight of a smiling Eric peering at you taking you off guard. You didn’t expect anyone to react to your greeting– not so delayed anyway– and the sight of your brother’s best friend carrying on in the conversation with you has you shocked beyond belief. “Excited?”

Finding yourself hum in agreement– how much you are still excited for the pool and for the sun, you’re not really sure– and although you are upset, something about his open and nice demeanor has you visibly relaxing, the sparkles inviting themselves back into your eyes. “I’ve never been to the beach,” you admit, seeing Eric gasp at you in surprise.

“Really?” he asks. “I go every year with my parents.”

“Well,” you hum, “you know how my mother is…” you sigh, chewing on the inside of your cheek. It’s easier to joke about it than to actually let the fact get to you– with your mother being the main news anchor, she is too busy to actually go on trips and form bonds with her own children sometimes. That’s why you spent most of your childhood at Eric’s family’s house in the first place– this is what made you the closest with Sunwoo’s same aged friend. His parents were nice enough to let you stay over and have sleepovers whenever your mum had to leave suddenly and take week-long trips abroad, or have emergency shifts during late evenings. 

Eric hums, sympathizing with you. “Well, at least you get to experience it now!”

“Yeah,” you awkwardly nod, playing with the hem of your jean shorts. It’s the shorts you made yourself by cutting the legs off your favorite pants after you grew out of them and they got too short, and they’re starting to look a little worn-out now. Maybe you should beg your mum to get you some new clothing.

The conversation between the boys grows in volume, doing nothing to help you to relax in the crowded vehicle. You can’t really find a place to fit yourself in and talk, the topics too unfamiliar for you and the feeling of not even being welcome in the discussion sitting heavy on your chest, when a finger bears itself to the flesh of your thigh, making you snap your head around to gape at the source of the contact. Eric looks at you with a boyish grin, sparkles evident in his eyes.

“Wanna see something?” he asks.

“Sure.”

The male digs around his backpack, hands searching through the contents of his bag for only a couple of seconds– since he’s the neat one, contrary to your messy brother– before he takes out a small gadget: a square with a little screen on top, a silver, circular button space sitting big in the very middle of the device. Eric throws the thing into your lap, smiling when you take it into your hands and examine it with curious eyes.

“Have you seen one before? My dad got it for me last week,” he boosts, satisfied with your reaction to it. 

Your mother’s job pays quite well– meaning that you usually have the latest gadgets, the latest trends– but if you’re being honest, you haven’t seen one of these in real life before. Yes, you caught a glimpse of an ad for it in the town center, on one of the big billboards while passing by to get to school in the morning, so you know that it’s an MP3 player, but still; this was your first time touching one and examining it in real life. 

“How does it work?” you ask, watching as the boy scoots from his seat to the middle one, so he is now sitting directly next to you, before he takes out wired headphones from the first department of his backpack and turns the little square over in his hands, finding where the jack goes.

“You put those in,” he says, plugging in the headphones, “and then you press this…” he explains, taking the device out of your hand and pushing on the power button for a few seconds, “and then it should play.”

Watching him with expecting eyes, the boy finally puts the MP3 player back into your hold. Then, his fingers swiftly put the respective earphones into your ears– like you’d do to a little kid that has no idea how they work, making you a little flushed at the action– and after that, you’re left with the sound of an unfamiliar song playing in your ears, making the sound of the chatter in the van completely tune out. Eric keeps on watching you, a sense of pride in his eyes as you nod at him, all excited with the new explory, before he takes one of the earphones out of your ear, grinning.

“Cool, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you nod. “The song is good,” you dumbly say, watching as the boy next to you pridefully nods at the compliment, resting his back against the car seat. 

“It’s the H.O.T album. My dad says they’re good,” he mumbles, moving the headphone he took from you and placing it into his ear, making you nod at him in acknowledgement. The action has your insides bubble with disappointment, thinking that the fun is over as you reach for the other earphone as well, offering it to the male.

Eric looks at you with a shocked pout, shaking his head. “No, we can share!” he says, pointing towards your ear. “If you want, of course.”

The action has you smiling, a shy nod escaping out of you as you reach and put the earphone back into your ear, letting yourself fall deeper into the car seat, listening to the song from Eric’s MP3 player. You’re grateful for his presence– he didn’t have to keep up a conversation with you. He could ignore you, just like the rest of his friend group always has. Maybe it was something about the two of you growing up together that always made the boy at least a bit more affectionate towards you than the rest.

You spend the car ride to the beach house with Eric leaning on your side, listening to music and his occasional blabbering about how his previous days went. 

Somehow, you're glad the seat beside him was the only vacant one when you arrived to the vehicle.

YOUR SEVENTH BIRTHDAY, 1989

You don't quite remember when you met Eric for the first time, if you’re being completely honest. The first memory you have of him is of your seventh birthday party, although you’re almost certain the boy’s been present at some point of your life before– at one point, you think you saw a picture of him and Sunwoo, two chubby toddlers, watching you as you laid on a blanket on the ground somewhere in your photo album. As far as you’re concerned, he may as well have been there when your mother brought you back from the hospital– although you think he must have been too young for that back then.

The first memory you have of Eric Sohn is the day you turned seven– a gloomy, sad day that in the moment, you prayed you wouldn’t have to remember in the first place.

It was already established that while your brother is the social butterfly, you don’t have a big friend group. Actually, you could count the number of your friends on one hand, and since the amount wasn’t as big, your mother allowed you to invite them all over to your house to celebrate your birthday with you. 

She baked a cake, she decorated the living room, hell, she even took a day off from work– something you deemed special, for it doesn’t happen often– and as you sat on the floor of your living room, the cake standing proud on the small coffee table, waiting for your friends to arrive, you hummed a song under your breath, the clock slowly passing the time you agreed for them to come over and celebrate.

At first, you didn’t mind it– everybody gets late sometimes, it’s okay. It was just a birthday party, and you had a lot of time. Not everything had to be set on schedule.

But the closer the clock moved to being one hour, than two after the time your friends were supposed to come, you grew worried. Your mother’s nervous pacing around the living room and her heavy sighs as she sat next to you on the floor, smiling at you in what you can only explain as sad way made you more and more anxious about the fact that you only had three friends, but all three of them seemed to not care enough to come celebrate your birthday with you. And as your mother finally took the final bow in the form of a soft hand on your inner thigh, her tone gentle as she called your name– “Y/N, I think we should light the candles,” you began to tear up.

You were supposed to eat the cake with your friends. You were supposed to hear them sing the birthday song to you. You were supposed to turn on the radio and dance around with your classmates, eat the sweets and unwrap the cheap, but heartfelt gifts they brought along with them to celebrate your birthday. 

But none of these scenarios were happening, and you felt incredibly, incredibly lonely and sad. Forgotten, if you will. Not cared for, definitely.

Hiding your face into your hands, you started to cry. This disappointment was too big for your small heart to take, and you no longer cared about the cake, the candles, the seaweed soup your mother cooked for you to celebrate, the gifts, or the party. All you wanted to do was hide in your room and never come out– something about the whole situation felt deeply embarrassing, and to this day, the moment before the whole day turned around still makes you feel a bit ashamed of yourself. 

Too busy crying, you didn’t notice your older brother watching you with big bambi eyes, a worried glance sent your way each time your sobs grew louder and louder. And maybe the boy only wanted to taste the cake (he’s been bugging your mum about it since the very morning, but he was always sent off with a scolding look telling him that he’ll get a slice when everyone arrives), but no matter what his true intentions were, his actions still managed to pull your seventh birthday party together in a way you never imagined.

The sound of the front door faintly resonated in your brain somewhere in the middle of your aimless sobbing, but you paid it no mind, thinking it was just Sunwoo going out to the yard to kick the ball. See, your older brother had never really known what to do when you cried growing up– it didn’t matter if he was the reason for your tears or if anyone else was. If he was the reason for your emotional outbursts, he tried to shut you up with his palm and get you to stop crying before his mother found out and gave him a scolding, but if someone else was, the small boy sometimes turned angry at the source. Kicking his classmate that once made a snarky comment about you and made you tear up or punching his friend when he was too harsh with you was all he knew to do in these situations, so he wasn’t the one to comfort you with words or hugs. It was only natural for him to escape in this situation.

You were brought to a state of shock and surprise when a hand landed on your shoulder, a familiar voice breaking you from your emotional turmoil.

“Why are you crying? We have to eat the cake!” you heard, your big, sad eyes meeting the small figure of the boy living next door, your brother nervously stepping from one side to the other right behind his best friend. “Can you light the candles, Mrs?” Eric politely asked your mum, pointing towards the cake waiting sadly at the coffee table, the figure of your mother leaving your side only shortly to get the matches from the kitchen and illuminate your face with the small flames.

Confusion mirrored your features as you watched your brother and his best friend sing the birthday song to you while your mum lit your candles, both boys clapping and dancing around, acting silly just to get a laugh from you. You didn't know how Eric got there, but you guessed there are some good sides to having him as your neighbor. The energetic boy did his best to brighten up your mood a bit, and when you blew out the candle, making a wish, Sunwoo even went as far as smashing your face into the cake to bring in the full birthday authenticity.

That got him a slap to the back of his head from your mother, as well as made you stand up from your position– no longer making you look like a disappointed bulk of pity– and chase him around the room, icing falling off your nose to the laminated floor. You got your revenge and smeared the chocolate all over his forehead (he let you chase him down only because it was your birthday and he really, really hated to see his sister cry, but he won’t ever tell you that) and as the three of you sat back down to the floor, watching your mother slice the cake and offer it to you on small white plates, you realized you suddenly weren't as sad anymore.

“What did you wish for?” Eric asked you, mouth full of cake and face messy with chocolate.

“I can’t tell you,” you hummed, eyebrows furrowed. “Then it won’t come true.”

“You probably wished for that doll you saw in the store the other day,” Sunwoo snickered as he swallowed, having you glare at him and send a sharp kick to his shin, unwatched by your mother (thankfully), as the boy fought you back, having no mercy.

Music suddenly filled the room as Eric stood up and put the radio on, his 9 year old brain smart enough to know how the device worked, his small figure dancing away to the songs playing on the single radio station you could play without carefully sorting out the antenna so it faced the north, and truly, you didn’t know how it happened, but it had you standing up and dancing around, exactly how you'd imagined doing with your friends from school.

The day wasn’t ruined– quite the opposite, really. It was one of your favorite birthday parties, and ever since then, Eric was invited to every single one you had after. And while Sunwoo may act like he doesn’t hate anything more in this world than having a younger sister, every time you feel like a burden to him, you remember this very afternoon.

You will never tell anyone what you wished for that day– but just to let everyone in on the secret, 

it was to somehow, just like Sunwoo, find someone like Eric for yourself as well. 

JUNE OF 1999

Standing at the side of the pool, eyes squinting from the inevitable force of the sun, you’re starting to regret your decision of coming along just a little. See, you usually don’t protest whenever Sunwoo aggressively drags you around and brings you everywhere he’s supposed to, because even though you love to see your brother angry (especially when you’re the reason behind the emotion), you’d also hate to see him miss out, but now, as the scorching hot sun is having no mercy on every exposed inch of skin– and believe me, there’s a lot of it, since you’re wearing your swimming trunks– and the sweat on your forehead is no longer culminating in beads, but rolling painfully slowly down your forehead, you do admit you’d be a little bit happier in the shade of your little room than here, watching the guys play volleyball in the comfort of the freezing cold pool.

And as the only female around the house, you settle with the patriarchy and bring out a small folding chair and a camping table alongside with a big, sharp knife, struggling to hoist up the giant watermelon you got in a grocery store on your way to the beach house, with the intention of cutting it and serving it to the guys later. Who knows, maybe they’ll like you a little more after that. 

The knife sinks into the thick green skin of the watermelon easily, and so as you accompany yourself with the excited (and not so excited screams coming from the losing side of the game– mainly your brother himself), you cut up the fruit into halves, then quarters, and as you stare at the moon crescents settled on the camping table, you decide to play nice and cut up the fruit into smaller triangles as well, to really get on everyone’s good side.

The yearning for male validation awakes in a woman pretty early on in life. It’s an inevitable misfortune.

“Told you Sunwoo’s all talk but no game!” you hear Haknyeon yell out as the game seemingly ends, the younger boy lunging at him in the pool, fighting him for the truthful words. Glancing at the commotion, you notice the guys slowly getting out of the pool, making you heave out in victory– you’re finally gonna have your turn in the pool. Well, if they don’t decide to occupy it again before you even get a chance to get in.

“Y/N! You cut up the watermelon?” Eric asks a very obvious question, walking up to you with beads of water all over his half-naked body. His dark hair is damply sitting against his forehead, making him look like a wet puppy, but as the male gets closer to you, he drags his palm through the locks and pushes them back, revealing his forehead– a sight sweet to your eyes, but you refuse to pay it much attention in the heat of the moment. It’s just the sun making you delirious as the idea of finding him attractive flashes through your brain, that’s all. 

“I did! Take one,” you smile, watching as the rest of the guys walk over to your little stand– while also obnoxiously swatting out water out of their hair like dogs, refusing to use towels like normal people– and finally, there it comes: appreciative smiles appear on their faces as they each take a piece, biting down on the fruit with delighted sighs.

Sunwoo walks up to you with a surprised look on his face, sighing as he messes with your hair. “If I knew you’d be our servant, I wouldn’t have even minded you going in the first place.”

“You do something nice for people and they jump on the chance to exploit you,” you hum, shaking your head in disbelief. “That’s just like you, Kim Sunwoo.”

“No, that’s just me having older brother privileges.”

“I hope you choke on that, you know,” you bite at him, pointing towards the piece of sweet watermelon in his hands, the smile on his face turning bitter. There’s a satisfied look on your face when your brother does, indeed, choke on a watermelon seed a few seconds later– and they say dreams don’t come true.

“You didn’t have to,” you hear Eric speak up from the other side, your head turning to face the male, his features appreciative and warm. “Thank you,” he beams. There’s redness on the tip of his nose and his forehead, signaling his quickly approaching sunburn, and you can’t help but laugh out at his clueless, Rudolph the red nosed reindeer self. 

“What’s so funny?” he asks, furrowing his eyebrows at you in question.

“Nothing,” you peep, “you just look like you forgot to use sunscreen,” you mumble, watching as the male gasps and touches his face, a horrified expression overtaking him when the skin under his fingertips burns to the touch. 

“I didn’t forget! It must have rubbed off in the pool,” he mourns, “I must look stupid!” 

“Only a little,” you tease, a grin overtaking your features. See, there’s something about the fact that you’ve known Eric for the entirety of your whole life that makes you more prone to teasing him– you’re familiar with your dynamics and just how far you can go, so his next actions startle you just the tiniest bit as the male looks sternly at you, throwing the half-eaten watermelon slice to the camping table. You thought you had the risks calculated– apparently, you didn't.

“What did you say?”

Examining his features, seeing no signs of anger– just the stoic, fakely-offended face of your brother’s childhood best friend– you shrug. “That you look a bit stupid with your face like that.”

“Oh, okay,” he nods, “you’re going down for that.”

“What do you mea–”

Your words are cut short when the male lunges at you, his arms enveloping your thighs and holding you up. The contact of his cold skin from the pool and your heated figure makes goosebumps appear all over your body, your hands instinctively reaching around him to support yourself as he walks closer to the pool– his intentions are suddenly painfully clear and you start to panic. 

“This will teach you to respect your elders,” Eric huffs, the turquoise surface of the water slowly coming into your point of view.

“Stop! Stop-stop-stop,” you squirm, kicking your feet and trying to take down the predator, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry, alright?”

The male takes a halt for a split second– making you foolishly believe he’ll let you off– before he breaks out into a devilish grin and continues to walk to the edge of the pool. “Too late.”

“Eric!” you scream, the volume of your voice resonating through the whole beach, your heart thumping wild against your ribcage with the awaiting process. You’re not even sure what you’re scared of anymore– you can swim and you bet the water will feel nice against the scorching sun– but still, you’re absolutely terrified as the male has no mercy on you, carrying you steadily towards the water. “At least let me tie my hair first! You can dump me in after, I promise,” you mourn, trying to buy yourself more time.

“Alright,” he nods, waiting at the very edge of the pool, leaving you to take the purple scrunchie off your wrist and gather your hair together, preparing to tie it into a bun so it doesn’t get in your way when you’re in the pool. The hair tie is just at the tips of your fingertips, the first loop over the hair ready to be done, when a scream cuts out of your throat.

The feeling of falling suddenly overtakes your body, leaving you no time to prepare yourself for the impact of the cold water against your skin and all up in your nose, since you didn’t pluck it when you were dumped into the pool. The fall only lasts a split second until you’re below the water, the force of it resonating in your ears, and when you finally act on your instincts and stand up in the pool (it wasn’t even that deep in the first place, only reaching to your upper stomach), you cough out all the water and pray to gods you don’t throw up chlorine into the freshly cleaned pool. After you’re done catching your breath and getting oxygen into your lungs again, you do your best at getting all the hair out of your face. 

There is laughter landing into your ears as soon as you manage to get all the water out of them by leaning your head to the side and violently slapping each one, and when your eyes look up, you see an amused Eric Sohn bending over in his waist at your disheveled appearance. 

Grunting and pointing a finger to the criminal that almost made you drown, you huff out. “I’ll kill you! Just you watch.”

Your scrunchie nowhere to be found, forever lost somewhere outside of the beach house, you think, as it flew off your hand in the impact of the attack, shock makes your figure shake alongside of the coldness of the water, making you audibly sigh. 

Yes. You do regret coming along just a little.

JULY OF 1999

Somewhere along the way, Eric Sohn starts acting as if he’s your second older brother. Sure, you’ve known the male your whole entire life and he’s seen you grow up, but it took him 17 years of your life to come to a point where he gives you equal amount of attention whenever he’s over at your house than he does to your brother, and even asks Sunwoo if you’re coming along with them whenever they leave to hang out somewhere else. It’s a change that comes naturally and slowly, and you welcome it unknowingly– the revelation shocks you on a hot summer day, though, when the idea finally comes to you in full force.

You would even argue and say Eric acts more like your brother than your actual sibling does– he asks if you’ve eaten and listens to you when you talk (which Sunwoo never does, well, except from when he’s arguing with you). Eric even compliments your outfits sometimes and lets you borrow his MP3 player from time to time– Sunwoo would never share his things with you, no matter how hard you pleaded and threatened to tell your mum. Yes, your brother's an adult and you’re one year away from becoming one– you still resolve your conflicts through your only parent, though. Some things, you never grow out of.

“I wanna try using the skateboard now, Sunwoo,” you order sternly when the boy finally reaches your destination. You’ve been sitting on the sidewalk for quite some time now, since your brother and his friend decided that they’re gonna try out their new skateboards on the hottest day of the year. Your town doesn’t have fancy skateparks and ramps like the ones you’ve seen in the music videos on TV, so you don’t really know what initially made the two buy those things, but you do admit that even driving up and down the road in front of your house does seem a little fun– so much you’d love to try it.

“What a shame we all wish for things we can’t have,” he shrugs ironically, shaking his head at you from his position above. The male reaches down for his bag, taking out a water bottle and putting it against his plush lips, all while you glare at him from below, still seated in your initial position. Eric comes up to you two, squishing at the soft plastic bottle in Sunwoo’s hold, making the water splash your older brother in the face, leaving a winning grin to be shared between you and the shorter boy, an expression that makes you all warm on the inside. See, at least Eric always has your back.

“You can try mine, if you want,” the latter shrugs, offering you a smile.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he nods, “why not?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, “I just didn’t expect you to offer, since as you saw, my dear brother just refused when I asked…” you mumble, standing up from the sidewalk and taking the skateboard into your hand. Eric offers it to you with an outstretched arm and watches as you put the board on the floor, squinting at it with much examination.

“Do you know how to ride it?” he asks.

“No,” you shake your head, “but I mean, if Sunwoo can do it, how hard can it really be?” you joke, seeing as the said boy glares at you, finally finishing his water and dropping the bottle to the ground. 

“I’ll remind you of that statement when you eat shit on the pavement,” he shushes you, rolling his eyes. 

Not paying more attention to the grumpy being that is your own brother, you relocate your attention back to the skateboard on the heated road. You’re lucky you live on a street where cars don’t often drive by, since your neighborhood is on the very edge of the town, so you don’t really fear being run over by a pickup truck. What you do worry about, though, is your lacking sense of balance, which you discovered when you learned how to ride the bike for the first time. While your brother was a professional in no time, it took you weeks to get it right, and so with the idea of riding a board that provides you zero sense of security, you get a bit worried for your own life.

Dragging your hair out of your face and aimlessly trying to tuck it behind your ears– there’s no use in trying though, as the strands slip out just as fast as they found their place– you keep staring at the board only a few centimeters away from your feet, mentally calculating your next move. There’s a noise of a backpack being opened and rustling around in the background of your miserable thoughts, and when you look up to see what’s going on, you notice Eric offering you a small, purple bundle of fabric. 

“What’s that?” you ask, even though the answer is clear as the day– you recognise your own scrunchie with no problem. You’re just surprised to see it in his hold. You thought it was forever buried somewhere in the beach house, since you weren’t able to find it after you got out of the pool, no matter how hard you tried.

“Oh,” he shrugs, amidst a little too nonchalantly, “I found it and figured it was yours, but I forgot to give it back to you then… it seems like you need it now, though,” he offers you an explanation, lips pressed into a thin line that slightly signifies a smile.

“Ah,” you gasp, nodding as you take the hair tie out of his outstretched palm, gathering your hair into a bun and tying it up on the crown of your head– the staring contest you’ve been having with the board is much clearer now, when you don’t have your messy strands in the way. The idea of Eric keeping your scrunchie after finding it at the beach house makes your stomach do a weird kind of turn– you guess it made you a bit weirded out, if you’re being honest.

“Want some help with that?” he asks, pointing towards his skateboard.

Nervous, cracking your knuckles as you meet his eyes– he looks a bit amused, but still genuine– you nod, admitting defeat. There’s no way you’re getting on top of that board without help and not falling down. It’s always better to be safe than to be sorry, and so when Eric laughs airly at your composure and takes a few steps closer towards you, you let the male lead you, finding comfort in his secure words and actions.

Eric offers you his arms to hold when you try to get on the skateboard. He is peering at you from under his eyelashes when you put one of your legs onto the wood, his grip on your forearm getting firmer when you try to get your other foot on as well– and you must admit that you suddenly don’t feel like you might die anymore when there’s someone holding you and standing by your side. 

“See? It’s not that hard,” Eric mumbles, his voice low and reassuring from the proximity. You notice your hands sweating a little when his palm envelopes yours– damn the sun and its unbearable heat making you embarrass yourself– but he doesn’t mention it as he firmly holds you and meets your eyes. “I’m gonna drag you around a bit so you get used to it before trying yourself,” he says before taking a few steps forward, preparing to be your own type of personal driver.

Having him instruct you and help you around makes you feel more comfortable on the board. Sunwoo would never do such a thing for you– he’d enjoy watching you fall down and break your neck and possibly die– so you’re more than happy to have someone in your life that takes care of you in ways your older brother refuses to. 

The skateboard moves forward a little, starting slow, but then picking up speed as Eric jogs a little, making you laugh at the action. He does not have to go above and beyond, but he still does– but you guess it’s good for him to let out his energy somewhere. After a while, he looks back at you and meets your eye with a warm gaze, making you nod at him reassuringly and hold up a thumb of the hand he’s not holding right now, signaling that you’re okay and enjoying yourself. That has the male let go of your hand and let you take the road with the laws of physics, moving forward by yourself with the force he created. 

It’s nice. It’s fun. 

Yes, you totally understand why Eric and Sunwoo wanted skateboards after seeing them on TV. Hell, you want one now.

“Try it yourself now!” Eric encourages you as the board naturally comes to a stop under you, and his smiling face is enough for you to take initiative and nod, relocating one foot off the wood and placing it on the floor, then kicking it and making yourself move on the simple vehicle.

A moment of surprise envelopes you like a warm hug when you manage to not fall off and keep your balance, the joy of it making you try to go faster on the board, kicking once, twice against the pavement with the sole of your old, beaten up shoe. “I’m doing it!” you yell, glancing back at Eric standing on the sidewalk, watching you with excited eyes. The male offers you a victorious holler, something that makes you break into a laugh, makes your confidence blossom in marvelous ways.

Confidence rises in you so much you try to take a U-turn and go back to your teacher– perhaps showing off that you really got the hang of it now, or something– but as you try to maneuver the board and turn right, there it comes: the moment where you realize that you were, once again, too overly-confident in your abilities that are, sadly, very poor. Your body sways from side to side, your poor balance laughs at you and points an accusing finger at your attempts, and, well, to put it frankly, your whole life flashes in front of your eyes and the moment plays in slow motion as you lose the board from below your feet– the wood flying somewhere to the opposite side of the road, not at all where you meant to go in the first place– and your body inevitably comes crashing to the ground.

Awaiting the hard pavement meeting your nose and breaking it, you brace yourself with palms outstretched in front of you, the last remains of self-perseverance entering the sane parts of your brain in what you think are the last seconds of your miserable life. Another moment of surprise greets you when your yelp is muffled against something soft and your hands don’t hit the hard pavement, your ears filled with a grunt that belongs to another human swiftly chiming in and catching you before you fall.

Firm hands hold your waist– the touch somehow familiar, enveloping you in a strange sense of deja vu– and even though your body goes limp in terror, the male has you back on your feet in no time, his palms on the exposed skin of your stomach. The realization has you burning up as you look up and meet Eric’s eyes, gasping at the closeness of his face to yours. 

“You okay over there?” he asks as you unconsciously study his face– you never noticed his nose looked this nice up close– before you wake out of it and nod urgently, breaking away from his hold. You’re not gonna try to calculate the effort he must have put in just to chime in and catch you from where he was standing in such a short moment, but something about the passing thought of it has you weak in your knees from gratefulness. 

“Uhm- yeah,” you nod, kicking the pavement with your stained shoes, “I just… miscalculated my skills, that’s all,” you sheepishly hum, hearing the boy snicker at your shaken-up composure.

Watching him take off and retrieve his skateboard from where it wandered off against the curb– much to his golden retriever energy– you sigh and prepare to go sit back on the sidewalk, having enough of new experiences from the shock still lingering in your fingertips. You take a glance down the road, seeing your older brother cruising on the street– when and how he got there, you truly have no idea– when you hear Eric, who seemingly has different ideas for your next actions, call at you from the middle of the pavement.

“Where are you going? Come back!” he asks, having you look at him in surprise, mouth agape and eyes big, staring at him. He now has the board under his shoulder, but puts it back on the road and points at it, shrugging to himself. “I’ll push you down the road, it’s gonna be fun!”

“Eric, I’m literally going to die–”

“No, you’re not. Come on, I promise,” he says, but still, he doesn’t have you convinced. Your feet move against your best conclusions, though, and when you come to a halt right in front of your companion, he offers you a boyish grin. “Sit down on it, that way you’re more balanced. I swear you’re not gonna fall off, okay? I got you.”

“You promise?”

“Yes,” he nods, determined.

“Pinky swear,” you mumble, holding up your pinky finger– all thoughts of seeming childish pushed to the side in the desperate moment– and the male in front of you shakes his head in disbelief, breaking into a laugh.

“Cute,” he huffs, “yeah, okay. Pinky swear,” he nods, interlacing your pinky with his and bumping his thumb against yours, the seal foolishly making you feel more secure as you follow his order and take a seat on the skateboard, your hands gripping the bottom of the wood so hard your knuckles turn white.

“Okay, ready? 3, 2, 1–” he chants as he pushes you, two steady hands coming in contact with your shoulder blades, force making you move on the board, wheels taking you down with gravity. The sound of Eric’s shoes hitting the pavement fills your ears as you go faster, and as you finally get to the part of the hill that takes a downwards slope, he offers you a final push, sending you down the road. 

Wind makes your hair fly back, your surroundings blurring as you yelp and scream, but you can’t say you’re not enjoying the ride. Eric was right– it was fun, you liked it, and something about the gesture had you all warm on the inside. The breeze has you cool down a little in the summer heat, and the board continues to move even as you pass your older brother standing at the bottom of the slope, away from your trajectory. 

Body relaxing when the skateboard finally slows down, you let out a heartfelt laughter. Turning back and seeing Eric jog down the road with a humongous grin on his face, you offer him two thumbs up above your head, watching as he returns the gesture and makes his way back to the two of you on the bottom of the small hill.

The truth is, this was the day you realized Eric Sohn has always found his way to make you feel included and safe. 

You can’t help but feel grateful.

AUGUST OF 1999

“Sunwoo, you have to tie a knot here and then– no, you dumbass, you’re doing it completely wrong,” you mourn as you watch your older brother with a mess of thread in his lap, a focused scowl on his face. There’s a fan standing across from you, blowing cold air into your face, but you still feel yourself grow heated with frustration as Sunwoo just can’t help but not understand the art of making friendship bracelets. It’s not like you’re forcing him to do them– he was the one that asked you to show him how to, muttering something about offering one to his classmate Yeji once he’s back in school– so in theory, he should be putting in effort, no? 

Or maybe he is. Maybe he’s just… incompetent.

“I don’t get it,” Sunwoo hums under his breath, sighing as he leans against the sofa in your living room, the two of you sitting on the floor accompanied by his best friend squinting at you from the opposite side, a comic book in the latter's hand. The myth of men not being able to multi-task is quickly thrown into the bin as you watch Eric pay equal amount of attention to the comic book and the dialogue between you and your brother, and when Sunwoo seems to give up on the art of making friendship bracelets, his best friend can’t help but laugh.

“You’re giving up already? This is how you want to get a girlfriend?” you poke your brother to his side and take the threads off his lap, examining the mess of a safety pin and meters of yarn, all knotted up and not coming along in the shape you taught him to at all.

“It’s not to get a girlfriend, I just-”

“Sure,” you roll your eyes, huffing as you roll his poor attempt at friendship bracelet into a ball and throw it to the corner of the room, making a mental note to pick it up and throw it to the bin later. “You know what, just give her this one and pretend you made it,” you mutter, taking a bracelet you'd already made to demonstrate in between your fingers and throw it into Sunwoo’s lap, the older one catching it and examining it under his nose.

“That looks pretty good,” he hums, making you snort at his appreciative comment. The bracelet is pink and red, the colors just screaming romance and cute energy, which is exactly what a girl needs to be swayed by your brother. You can’t really believe a bracelet will make her swoop into his arms, because truthfully, with your brother’s face and manners, every living thing is keeping a fair distance, but hey, it doesn’t hurt to try, does it? Maybe his classmate is… majorly blind? That might do it?

“Of course it looks good,” you scoff, “that’s because I made it,” you nod, averting your gaze towards your lap, threading your fingers through the yarn you attached to a safety pin on your sweatpants to keep the growing friendship bracelet in place. 

“Then why is the one you’re making right now so ugly?” Eric asks, pointing towards the creation. 

Glancing up at the male slowly, mentally throwing all different kinds of curses at him for daring to talk badly about your craft, you huff. “What do you mean, ugly?”

“The colors… they don’t… they don’t really go together,” Eric sheepishly admits, scratching the back of his neck, quickly averting his gaze from you and gluing it back into his comic book. You think that if he doesn’t stop being a smart-ass and throw jabs at your artistic choices, he’s gonna have to protect his comic book with his own body– and you bet he’d do that, because he borrowed it from the library. The fees for damage are high.

“That’s just… not true at all,” you muse, but groggily take a look at the creation once again, but now, thanks to the remark, seeing it in a completely different way. Shades of orange, brown and purple stare back at you amidst a little disappointedly, and as you thread the yarn and make a couple of knots to end the bracelet, you can’t help but feel a pout growing on your face from the realization. Eric might be right. It does look a little bad…

“Whatever. Your taste is just bad,” you snap as you finish off the craft piece, unclasping the safety pin and sliding the bracelet off the inside, freeing it from the hold. Eric laughs a little at your frustrated state– similarly to what you do when you manage to get Sunwoo upset– and with that, you sigh and put the bracelet on the coffee table.

“I’m going out to the store to get some chocolates,” you say as you stand up, goal clear in your mind, “have fun, losers.”

“You’re still collecting the stickers from these?” Sunwoo asks, a mischievous smile growing on his lips. The teasing is inevitable and coming very soon, and there’s nothing you can do about it– you’re fully aware, which only further makes you want to escape the situation more quickly. Rolling your eyes at your brother’s antics, you move towards the door. 

“Yes, Sunwoo, I am. They’re cute and make me happy, do you have a problem with that?” you point an accusing finger at the male, having him shrug, tongue poking the inside of his cheek.

“You’re such a kid,” he huffs, averting his gaze from you when he lands the comment, the jab coming straight at your fragile heart.

“Okay, then,” you note, “I’ll just have my pretty and cute bracelet back, and you can get your girlfriend something else-”

The male quickly regains his previous composure, swatting his hands in hurry just to make you halt in your sentence. His eyes are big and his mouth is a little agape in terror as he tries to save his ass, plea written all over his face. “I was just joking! Don’t be so petulant… go get your cute stickers, they’re so fun!”

Humming to yourself, your face is tugged up into a victorious smile. “That's what I thought. So, as I was saying, have fun, losers.”

“Wait!” Eric suddenly calls for you, making you turn on your heel in the middle of your escape, eyes peering at the male. “Don’t I get a bracelet too?”

The request catches you off guard. There’s a certain kind of spark in Eric Sohn’s eyes as he asks the question, and you can’t really place it in any category, but it has you nervously shrugging at the preposition. You’re not really sure why Eric would want a bracelet from you, but to avoid confrontation and also the weird leap of your heart surely leading you into cardiac arrest, you only shrug and move back inside of the living room, chewing on the inside of your cheek as you scan the surroundings, searching for something.

“Sure,” you nod, taking the ugly bracelet off the table and offering it to him, “you can have that one.”

You hold a staring contest with the older boy for a couple of seconds, his head undoubtedly swirling with arguments and comments about the apparel of the friendship bracelet, but he’s smart– he must know the survival of his beloved comic book must be at stake. So, he only nods and smiles at you, outstretching his hand to you and nudging his head in its direction.

“Okay,” he hums, “tie it for me?”

A second comes by– a heartbeat, really– in which you chew on your bottom lip and gasp at the request, but still, you nod and come closer, crouching down to be at his level and taking the thread into your fingers. You wrap the bracelet around his wrist, making sure to leave a bit of wiggle room before you tie a knot, bringing the ends together, all while feeling the eyes of Eric glued to your face, watching every micro expression flash through your unsettling composure.

When you’re done, making a move to hide your hands behind your back and standing up, your limbs bump into each other and send an unspoken sense of electricity all through your body. The sensation is so strange you don’t meet anyone’s eye before you leave the room, yelling out a goodbye as you hurriedly open the front door and run out to get fresh air (it’s August, though. The air is humid and only makes your head spin more).

You clear your throat before you take off to the grocery store. It's only when you're halfway there that you realize you'd forgotten to bring your wallet with you. It's okay, though– you take this chance to walk around, regaining your casualty.

You bet Eric will take the bracelet off in a matter of a week.

SEPTEMBER OF 1999

The leaves start turning orange and the weather a bit colder when you become hyper-aware of your shifting composure whenever Eric Sohn is around. The way you feel heat rushing to your cheeks whenever he calls you cutie, a nickname he’s had reserved for you since you two were little kids, the way you feel weak in your knees whenever he casually brings his arm around your shoulders or when he bends down to tie your shoelace in the middle of the sidewalk. You don’t really know what those sudden changes are, yet, you feel a bit embarrassed by them whenever they take place. You don’t think it’s normal to feel this way around your brother’s best friend, and the more you hang out with him, the more you wish you read less books as a child– because now, you’re also hyper-aware of the title those feelings may have. 

Still, it only comes to you on one September afternoon– you wake up from blissful unawareness and jolt with the quickly opening pit in your stomach at the strange revelation.

“Eric! Sunwoo isn’t home, though?” you mumble, confused as you notice the boy standing on your doorway, a plastic bag in his hand and a red Nike jacket enveloping his frame.

“I know, he said he’s hanging out with Juyeon hyung today,” he nods, “I brought you something, though,” he says, holding up the bag and making sure you get a chance to see it, offering you a boyish grin.

“Oh?” you gasp, furrowing your eyebrows at the male. When you do nothing to invite him inside, he does so himself– slightly nudging you in your side as he passes your figure and enters your house. He acts like he owns the place, and by the amount of time he’s spent in your home, you’d think he does– he doesn’t, though. The only thing he owns is just a lot of audacity.

The male takes off his shoes in the entryway and walks his way over to your room– a surprising act, considering he’s spent the least amount of time in this very place– and when he’s sure you’re following his every move, he empties the contents of the bag to the middle of your freshly made bed. Watching as approximately ten items fall out of the plastic, your eyes widen with surprise as you recognise your favorite chocolate– the mini bars with stickers inside, the ones you collect and stick into your journal and look at in the middle of the night, giggling to yourself and kicking your feet at the adorable pictures in your make-shift collect book.

“Woah,” you gasp when the male looks at you, seemingly awaiting your response, and when he gets the wished outcome, pride overtakes his features, shrugging to himself.

“My mum got some for free because she bought a lot of cabbage for kimchi yesterday,” he explains, “I thought of you when I saw them, so I bought you some more.”

“I- you-” you stutter, emotions too big for your own good swelling all inside your fragile, little self, hands running into your hair and tugging at the roots to wake yourself up from the dream. “You didn’t have to!”

“We got them anyway, and I know you like the stickers,” Eric shrugs, scratching the back of his neck, completely ignoring the fact that he said he bought you some more, your heart skipping a beat at the sentiment. Clearing your throat, you tentatively take a step closer to your bed, gathering a bar of chocolate into your hand and opening it, taking a bite.

“You can have the stickers if you give me some chocolate,” Eric says close to your ear, almost as if he was creating a masterplan, to which you eagerly nod and plop onto your bed, moving the bars of sweets into one pile. As you continue to munch on the first one, you unwrap the sticker and look at it, praying to yourself as if you were checking if your lottery ticket was worth any cent– hoping you get a sticker you don’t own yet.

The image of a cute panda would cheer anyone up even in their darkest moments– not you, though, as you mourn and sigh, disappointment clear in your features. 

“What?” Eric asks, eyes big pools of worry.

“I already got that one.”

“Ah,” he nods, seemingly understanding– much to your surprise, “well, we got 9 more tries, let’s get to eating.”

Wrappers are rustling in your bed sheets as you and Eric eat the concerning amount of chocolate, gathering the stickers in a little pile on top of your notebook, promising each other to not look at the stickers as you go and just make a grand reveal at the end. Eric’s full cheeks are a sight you enjoy, telling him he looks like a squirrel– to which he sends a light flick to your forehead, telling you you don’t look much different– and soon enough, the nine bars left disappear from your plain sight (you only had 3 and Eric ate the remaining 5. He’s a growing boy, though, so you understand. He needs to get his undying energy from somewhere.).

“Ready for the reveal?” you ask, locking your gaze with Eric.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

With that, you get to the pile of stickers in the middle of your bedsheets. Looking at the first one, there’s a happy squeal cutting out of your throat, the image of an adorable yellow duck warming you up with euphoria. 

“You don’t have that one yet?”

“I don’t,” you nod, “this is just perfect.”

Eric nods and watches you with a certain kind of warmth in his gaze as you open up your notebook and stick the newest addition to your little sticker farm– or a ZOO, however you wanna call it. The next sticker from the pile is added as well– a brown, big bear– and the next one too, the most adorable colorful parrot slapped to the corner of your page. 

The rest of your stickers are the ones you already own, though– a displeased look takes over your features at the knowledge, but still, you can’t help but beam at the fact that you have 3 new additions to your collection, and they were a gift from Eric Sohn himself. Someone who doesn’t make fun of your childish habit. Someone who feeds your little interest, watches you with excitement in his eyes as you indulge. Someone not like your brother. 

Someone you could never see the way you see your brother.

“What do you do with the duplicates?” Eric asks, pointing to the sad pile on the top of your notebook. His figure is closer to you now, since he wanted to watch you stick the animals into your notebook, his crossed legs almost pressed against yours on the small bed.

“Well, usually, I just throw them out,” you shrug, “but since you’re here…” you muse, the idea plopping into your head like the newest discovery you should probably patent, peeling the back of one of the dog stickers off and swiftly turning towards your companion, mischief sparkling in your eyes.

You put the sticker on his left cheek, making the boy jump. “Hey!”

Giggling, taking another one of the stickers and pressing it to the middle of his forehead, Eric starts to fight you, your bodies wrestling on the bed. You don’t think he puts much effort into getting you off him– that, or he’s insanely weak– and in no time, his face is adorned with all different kinds of animals, his hair messy from tussling in your bedsheets. The image has you laughing before you realize you’re basically straddling him on your bed, his big eyes gaping at you from below, his appearance enough to make something in your brain short-circuit and make you leap off him, clearing your throat.

Heat rushes into your cheeks as you take a seat next to him, playing with your fingers. You pray for anything to come and ease the awkwardness you caused, and sure enough, today must be your lucky day. “Hey, look here!” 

You call for the boy as you swiftly take your polaroid camera off your bedside table– the one that belonged to your dad, the one you fought with Sunwoo about, the one your mum said was yours because Sunwoo is too careless with his things to keep it safe– and snap a picture of the puppy-like boy, laughing at the fact that now, you have the image of him looking dumb and covered in stickers forever. Or at least until he doesn't take it away from you– which he attempts quickly.

“Hey!” he yelps again, huffing as he lunges at you, trying to take the picture out of your grasp as you drop the camera into your soft sheets. Your feet take you to the living room, navigating through furniture, and when you don’t hear footsteps follow you, you think you’re safe– Eric does have a lot of energy, but chasing you around gets tiring for him quickly when he knows you'll never let him win.

Entering your room once again, prepared to find him on your bed like before, you’re taken by surprise as a shutter sound goes off right after you open the door, a polaroid picture taken of your face making you temporarily blind at the flash.

“Eric!” you whine, hating that there’s a picture of you standing shocked at your doorway now forever in the universe– not really caring that the boy just got you back with the exact stunt you pulled on him just a few minutes ago. Before you get a chance to blink out the blind spots in your vision caused by the flash and run after him, though, you feel him gently press you out of the doorway and slip outside, the sound of the front door opening and closing after him resonating along his slowly disappearing, amused laughter.

Serves you right, doesn’t it? 

Sighing, you shake your head and take a seat on your bed, the picture of the boy still in between your fingertips. You only take a look at it when your vision comes back to normal, and as the image of Eric covered in stickers, hair messy and cheeks rosy below the animal print comes into your sight, the revelation arrives the same second a starstruck smile plays with your features.

And with that, you’re absolutely terrified. 

Throwing the polaroid picture onto the bedside table and lunging yourself into the sheets, you scream into your pillow and wish for the feelings to disappear– because in what world does a crush on your brother’s best friend ever come to a happy ending?

OCTOBER OF 1999

Once October hits, you find yourself home alone more often than you’d like. Sure, you don’t mind having some me time to read comic books or watch the TV uninterrupted in the living room, but still– alone turns lonely pretty quickly, and somehow, you start to regret the fact that you’ve been relying on your older brother and his friends for so long instead of making some connections on your own.

Sunwoo started to play soccer at school– something is telling you that he might go far if he keeps it up– and that’s why he’s been stuck at practice every single day, coming home late in the evening all tired, but happy, so you’re not really complaining. Eric works in the little bistro downtown now, since he wanted to make some money and not rely on the allowance Mrs. Sohn gives him every month, and it’s not like you were that close to begin with, but the fact that the boy is now too busy to meet you is making your spirit fall just the tiniest bit. And with your mother always being at work, you find yourself alone in your room, laying in your bed and staring at the ceiling. 

Sometimes, you journal. About anything and everything, really. You don’t really think you’re ever gonna read back the entries once you’re older, since they would just be a reminder of how miserable and boring your teenage years really were, and that’s why you allow yourself to be authentic. On most days, you write about your assignments for school. Sometimes you bad mouth a classmate or two– gossiping with the diary pages, because you don’t really have any human beings to do so in real life– and seldom, you allow yourself to get into topics that evoke the slightest bits of existential crisis in you.

Topics like college. Growing up. Your lack of hobbies and social interaction with the outer world. The newly found crush on Eric Sohn…

Okay, maybe you do write about the boy with brown hair and dark eyes a little too often. You can’t help it, though– when he’s not giving you any new interactions to dwell on, you have to just pick apart the old ones. You think it’s a natural reaction.

And that’s exactly what you’re doing one October afternoon, the lamp in your room on, since the evening comes faster when the weather is colder, as you’re laying in your bed and kicking your feet back and forth, chewing on the end of your pencil. The sound of your doorbell resonates through the house suddenly and startles you, making you jump awake from your delirious delusions.

Mentally going through the list of possible visitors you could have– because it can’t be your mother or your brother, since they never forget to carry their house keys– you’re lost, not really finding any fitting candidates. Furrowing your brows, lost in thought and frankly, a bit confused, you plant your socked feet onto the wooden floor and walk over to the front door just in time for the bell to ring again. Scratching the back of your neck in nerves, thinking of precautions you could take for your own safety– since your front door doesn’t have a peep hole and you don’t want to open the door to a complete stranger– you clear your throat and yell over the door.

“Who is it?” you ask.

“Delivery!” a voice calls through the door, making you huff. 

“I didn’t order any food?” you yell back, confused. “Sir, there’s another house behind ours, sometimes the mailmen get confused and we get their mail. Maybe try there?” 

“The address is right, though?” the voice calls again, and somehow, it sounds kind of familiar… no, it can’t be, you dumb goose. You’re just imagining things because you’ve spent the last 20 minutes writing about the curve of his nose into your diary.

“There must be a mistake-”

“Come on, Y/N, open the door,” the voice on the other side mourns, the mention of your name making you jump, completely startled. The tone the man says it in is sweet like honey, though, so familiar in your ears, that you mentally want to slap yourself– so you weren’t dreaming. It is him.

Dragging your hand through your hair to smooth it down, praying you look at least a little presentable– although in your stained sweatpants and the Pokémon shirt you inherited from Sunwoo when he grew out of it, you doubt that’s even possible– you open the door and try to offer Eric a warm smile. “What are you doing here?”

“Food delivery,” Eric shrugs, pointing with his thumb in the direction behind his back, where his bike undoubtedly stands up against your gate.

“Oh…. but I already told you I didn’t order anything,” you mumble, confused. Studying his face– because a girl can indulge when she has the opportunity, am I right? – you notice his hair has grown a little longer, falling into his eyes. You bet it’s hard for him to see, but you must admit it looks nice, and you almost tell him, before you catch yourself and break away from the sentiment. 

The male snickers. “I know, I was just joking,” he says, “I did bring you food, though.”

“Why?” you ask, confused when he bends over and picks up a plastic bag off the ground, a container of food inside, the warmth of the contents making condensation appear all over the red sack. 

“We made this by mistake and it was just gonna be thrown out if nobody took it,” he shrugs, “and I figured you haven’t eaten yet– or if you did, you just had those cold kimbap rolls from the store– and I wanted to get some warm food into your stomach.”

“Ah,” you gasp, nodding at the explanation. It does explain the source of the food really well, but truthfully, it explains nothing about the fact why Eric thought of bringing you the food instead of taking it home with himself– he’s a foodie if you’ve ever seen one. The idea of him worrying about if you were fed or not is equally as strange and interesting in your head– still, you clasp your hand around the bag and take it, the smell making you involuntarily hungry. “Thank you.”

Eric only nods at you, a smile beaming at his face. “Well,” he sighs, “I’d love to stay longer and hang out, but I’m still on the clock, so…” he mumbles, taking a hesitant step backwards towards his bike, eyes never breaking contact with yours.

“Oh, right,” you nod, “that’s okay. Have a fun day at work!” you muse, watching him as he grins and finally retrieves back his bike, opening up the gate to your property and escaping, waving at you as he gets on.

“I’ll see you soon!” he calls as he rides off, your eyes following him until his figure disappears behind a corner, your ears buzzing with excitement and your lower lip trapped between your teeth with the innocent promise.

Walking back into the house, you grin as you close the front door behind you and carry the food into the kitchen. You quickly get the containers out of the damp bag, putting them onto the wooden table, and gasp when you find a sticky note on the very top one, a messy handwriting scribbled in a rush, but stuck to the food with care.

Eat well and don’t skip meals, Y/N-ie!! – Eric x

Not being able to battle your smile anymore, you decide to open up the containers and stuff your mouth with the food instead– only to find your favorite dish inside, staring back at you in what seems to be a dream that’s too good to wake up from. 

And sure, you are delusional, but are you delusional enough to believe that this wasn’t all a coincidence? You’re not so sure.

Still, you eat the food with feet kicking back and forth as you sit in the silent kitchen, the empty house no longer feeling so lonely. When you’re done, you throw the trash out– everything but the sticky note, which you glue into your diary a few minutes later, hoping to keep the memory forever.

NOVEMBER OF 1999

The world around you is dark as you step outside of cram school, your eyes are tired and your skin is prickled with goosebumps in the chilly air. You despise going to cram school, but your mother told you you have to– since you didn’t have any athletic features that could get you far in life like Sunwoo, you had to be good at studying, or else you won’t get into university. There was a lot of work ahead of you, but since you didn’t really have anything else to do in the day, you didn’t protest and went anyway.

The days are usually very long and you get off very late, resulting in you being tired almost all the time. When you get home, you undress yourself and change into your sleep clothes and doze off until the morning, when you have to wake up and go to school again– it’s an exhausting cycle, but you know you have to endure it for your own sake.

Walking down the steps that lead out the cram school building, you stretch your body and huff, cursing at yourself for the fact that you didn’t bring a jacket– you forgot that evenings get really chilly, and frankly speaking, you didn’t have much time to think when you were rushing to get ready in the morning. You’ll just have to get through it, you think to yourself as you walk in the direction of your house– the last bus to your neighborhood already left an hour ago, when you were in the middle of revising division– your sneakers kicking the stray rocks below your feet as you tug the sleeves of your hoodie lower, desperately trying to feel more heat.

“Do you never watch where you’re going? That’s gonna get you in trouble one day, you know,” you hear a familiar voice say, the joking tone making your heart skip a few beats as you place the owner of the saccharine voice to its face. Looking up, slightly alarmed at being caught in such a distressed state, you gasp.

“I was… watching my step, I guess,” you shrug as you come into a halt in front of him, shivering both under Eric’s gaze and the cold weather at once. “What are you doing here? Deliveries?”

“I just got off,” he says, “so I figured I could stop by. Sunwoo said you’re going to cram school, I thought you might enjoy some company on your way home.”

Gaping at his explanation, you nod, completely startled. The idea of your brother talking about you in front of Eric, the boy you have a very embarrassing, very big crush on scares you, to say the least. See, it doesn’t really matter that the boy grew up with you, pretty much seeing you at your lowest whenever he was around over at your house when you were both just little kids– the image of Sunwoo telling Eric about finding you sobbing at your comic book (the scene got too sad, nobody can really blame you) or about how your favorite jeans ripped right before you had to go to school one morning is terrifying. You don’t really want him to know about these things. He may act like your brother sometimes, but you never really saw him in that light in the first place.

“Well, then,” you clear your throat, “it’s… it’s good to see you,” you say. Eric shows you his boyish grin as your lips utter out the words, and you can’t help but mirror it, your eyes locking with the male. As if you just took a step back, your eyes see him in a light you’ve never seen him before– as if this was your first time meeting your brother’s best friend– and something about the sentiment has your stomach feeling all uneasy, heat rushing to your face. His hair is styled in a way that tells you that he didn’t really style it (or if he did, it looked truly effortless in your eyes, so props to him), pushed back a little and revealing his forehead, a few of the strands carelessly falling into his eyes. His jawline is sharper than how it was when you first met the boy, and with the realization of a foolish teenage girl, you have to admit that Eric Sohn grew up to be a very attractive, attentive man.

“You’re cold?” he says, although the sentence sounds more like a statement rather than a question, before he shakes his head at your antics and heaves out a sigh. “You should’ve taken a jacket with you when you went, you know it gets cold in the evening,” he scolds you. In those times, he reminds you the most of your brother– because although you and Sunwoo act like you hate each other sometimes, you know the older male still cares about you. He just hates showing it, which translates in his scolding tone whenever you do something wrong or against his wishes. 

In those times, Eric reminds you the most of the way your brother treats you, and you somehow hate it. You despise the fact, because that means he must only see you as someone like his younger sister– he never had one, so maybe he just likes to compensate for it by taking care of you all the time. Maybe he feels responsible to do so because of Sunwoo. The thought makes you equally as nauseous– you’d never want him to hang out with you just because he feels like he has to. 

“I didn’t have time in the morning,” you grunt, rolling your eyes at him. You avert your gaze from the male, for it makes you slightly uncomfortable after your previous thoughts, so when the noise of a zipper being pulled down and the weight of fabric on your shoulders brings you back to reality, you snap your head around at him all alarmed. 

“What? Wear it,” he says, head shrugging towards the direction of his jacket on your figure. “You’re gonna catch a cold if you don’t.”

Trying to wrestle out of the red material, you squirm in the hold of the windbreaker– Eric’s hands gripping each side of the jacket, as if predicting your next moves, making sure it stays on you and doesn’t fall down. His strong arms tug you closer to him to make your fight more difficult– and he’s successful with his efforts, because the proximity of him and his smell engulfs you and unarms you, heat rushing to your cheeks as you halt in your movements.

“Stop,” you mourn, “I don’t need it.”

“Yes you do,” he insists, “so stop being a baby about it and wear it.”

Staring into his eyes, as if to mentally tell him to stop what he’s doing– to stop how he’s treating you, how he’s making you all weak in your knees and sleepless at nights because of how much you think of him and hope he’s doing well each day, to stop being so gentle with you and taking care of you, because it brings all sorts of both doubts and delusions into your head– but he doesn’t back down. You’ve known him for quite some time, you should already be aware of just how stubborn he can be.

“Arms in,” he hums, holding on to the jacket and waiting for you to wear it properly. One thing about you– you can always admit your defeat. So, with a sigh, you put your arms through the sleeves of Eric’s red windbreaker, shrinking a little under his firm gaze. He looks at you with a look full of something you can’t decipher, and it’s all making you so, so insanely lost in the many thoughts and feelings swirling around your head, not helping your current state.

“I already have a brother, y’know,” you mumble in a moment of weakness, looking at your feet– your dirty white sneakers almost touching his from how close you are standing right now, “so you should stop treating me like one.”

A moment of silence overtakes you two, and you suddenly feel like you’ve done something wrong. Still, Eric’s hands are holding on to the sides of the opened jacket, keeping you close to him. “Hm?” 

Clearing your throat and shaking your head, you snicker to yourself. “Forget it.”

“No- I mean,” he blurts out, tone of voice a little nervous, “do you see me as your brother figure?” he asks, tone of voice more quiet now, more gentle.

Breathing in the crispy air, taking a moment before you reply, you shake your head in disapproval. “No,” you say, “no, I don’t. I- I don’t think I do,” you say, scared of what your answer will bring out of him. You don’t really know why, but at this moment, you feel insanely fragile– as if any bad move could make you break in his hands, waiting for him to glue you back together. 

Metaphorically, he does just that. “Good,” he nods, leaning down towards you, hands gripping the zipper of his jacket and zipping it together, making sure no cold can get to your bones as his fingers tug it up towards the very top, under your chin. “Because I’ve never seen you as my sister either.”

His answer once again startles you– but when you take a step back from the situation, you think it was in a good way. His hands grip your shoulders for a second as his eyes meet yours and he offers you a warm smile. “Come on, let’s get you home,” he says, tugging you towards the fence where you find his bike, his motions guiding you like a rag doll sucked out of all life.

“Hop in,” he motions towards the back of the bike, where the basket would usually be– Eric moved it towards the front, though, leaving enough room for you to sit at– and as you do, he takes a seat in front of you and looks back at you over his shoulder. “Hold on tight so you don’t fall.”

Like in a trance, your arms sneak around his middle– this was the first time you had this kind of physical touch with him, and just the thought of it makes you want to scream your throat out– before the male takes off on the bike, riding towards your neighborhood. With the cold wind slapping your face, you foolishly rest your cheek on his shoulder blade and close your eyes, enjoying the closeness of his body keeping you warm. 

If anyone asked you about the action, you’d tell them you were just tired.

DECEMBER OF 1999

Socked feet make their way through the room, the sound of footsteps resonating on the laminated floor, as the short male comes up to you with a bowl of potato chips in his right hand and a bottle of soda under his left arm. Eric Sohn sighs at you, shaking his head in disbelief, before he places the items onto the coffee table and takes a seat next to you on the floor, opening up the bottle and pouring the three of you drinks.

“Can’t believe I’m spending New Year’s Eve with you losers, of all people,” Eric snickers, having you roll your eyes at the male and grumpily furrow your eyebrows at his sentence.

“No one’s stopping you if you wanna go, y’know,” you grunt as you take the filled glass off the table, taking a sip of the sweet drink and sighing at him. If he’s gonna take a leap into the new year with you while making you annoyed, he may as well leave now and do whatever his initial plan was– once again, no one’s stopping him if that’s what he wants to do.

“I’m just saying,” he shrugs, “it would’ve been so much more fun if we all went to Juyeon hyung’s. Everyone’s there celebrating, but we’re stuck here in your room.” 

“Well, Eric,” your brother smiles ironically at him, shrugging to himself, “it’s not like it’s my fault you’re not over at Juyeon hyung’s right now. You chose to spend the new years here with me. My mother prohibited me from going there, not yours.”

The argument has the male shrug, his eyes averting your brother’s gaze once his comment gets a bit too honest and realistic. It’s true and he’s right– it’s not like Eric’s mum told him he can’t go celebrate with his friends, because she didn’t. Eric’s mum trusts him and wants him to have fun and do what all the kids his age are doing. Your mum, on the other hand, is making you and Sunwoo stay home for New Year’s Eve to celebrate with your family, because, as she quoted, New Year’s Eve the only time she gets time off work, and she wants to spend it with her kids– forget the fact that you’re currently sitting locked in your room with your friend, protesting the family time just because you can– and when Sunwoo told her she has to stop treating him like a little kid, she told him she has all the right to do so, because he is her kid. And that’s how the party he was supposed to attend with Eric (the party you foolishly thought you’re gonna have to tag along to, not hating the sentiment as much as before now) got canceled from your brother’s plans.

“Well,” Eric chews on the inside of his cheek, “I did it for you two. Be grateful.”

“Whatever,” you hum, “let’s turn on the TV. I bet there’s some variety show on.”

Eric heaves out a sigh as he reaches for the TV remote, clicking the power button and making the boxy device in front of you light up. Your mum got you a TV in your room when you complained about being too bored one November day, and although the box of entertainment didn’t really help like you imagined it to, you’re glad it’s of service at least today. Instead of the expected variety show, though, there’s news on– the face of the old announcer looking at you with a serious look on his face, the professional tone making chills run down your spine, for he reminds you a bit of your mother when she scolds you. You think that’s a common news announcer trait. 

“As the year 2000 approaches, computer programmers realize that computers might not interpret the 00 in the software as 2000, but 1900. The softwares currently running only use a two-digit code for the year, excluding the 19. The data was excluded because the data storage is costly and takes up too much space. Activities that were planned on a daily basis could be damaged or flawed,” the announcer says, making the three of you look at the screen with interest. Maybe it’s true that when you get older, you get more interested in news– you think it’s good to know what’s going on around you, although the topic discussed right now might not even concern you in the slightest.

“Banks, which calculate the interest rates on a daily basis, could face real problems. Interest rates are the amount of money a lender, such as a bank, charges a customer, such as an individual or business, for a loan. Instead of the rate of interest for one day, the computer could calculate a rate of interest for minus almost 100 years!” 

“Oops,” Eric lets out next to you, a reaction so far away from what a real adult would think of the situation. See, you are all just kids, after all.

“Centers of technology, such as power plants, are also threatened by this issue. Power plants depend on routine computer maintenance for safety checks, such as water pressure or radiation levels. Not having the correct date could throw off these calculations and possibly put nearby residents at risk,” the announcer continues, the information coming out of his mouth suddenly making you hyper aware of the reality you’re experiencing right now.

“Do we have a nuclear power plant nearby?” you ask in a hushed whisper, watching as the men next to you almost comically widen their eyes, shrugging.

“I’m not sure,” Sunwoo peeps.

“The worst of all, this software and hardware issue could cause such a big problem in nuclear energy facilities, where nuclear bombs and missiles could be set off, causing the world to go into utter chaos, or worse, an end,” the announcer concludes, the last word making you gasp in terror. 

“An end?” you chirp, sitting up straight in your seat as you look at the two men, now equally as terrified. There’s something in Sunwoo’s gaze that makes chills run down your spine, the reality crushing down on you with heavy measures. 

“I knew I shouldn’t have fought with mum. What if the last words the two of us exchanged before we die are the harsh words I had said yesterday?” your brother mourns, seeing as his best friend chews on his bottom lip, lost in thought.

“What did you say to your mum?”

“That- that I’ll never forgive her for ruining this for me,” he mumbles, his voice breaking at the end, “and… other things,” he adds, the hint of incoming panic making his best friend frantically wave his hands around and try to make your brother relax before he has to deal with the breakdown. If the world is ending, this is not how any of you want to go.

“It’s okay, don’t worry,” Eric says, clearing his throat and pointing to the TV, “look! The show is on, we should watch before the year ends,” he proposes, taking the remote into his hand and turning the volume up to hopefully drown out Sunwoo’s thoughts and have him focus on something else. And it works– noting that your brother has an attention span of a 5 year old– he can hardly remember what he was worrying about just 30 seconds ago.

Still, the thought keeps bouncing around your head like a child in a bouncy castle. The words of the news anchor keep repeating in your brain, making your ears ring as you look at Eric from the corner of your eye, watching his angelic face. Oh how you hate disturbing the peace now that you’ve all calmed down– but still, you can’t deal with the worries alone. Checking the clock hung above the TV, noticing there’s at least 5 minutes left before midnight, you clear your throat, feeling your whole body on fire.

“Do you really think the world is gonna end?” you ask, cracking your knuckles in a nervous manner. Looking at Eric, pupils shaking, you find your brother’s best friend seemingly lost in thought. The music of the variety show program serves you three as a background sound now, none of you paying attention to the TV anymore, instead, focusing on all the things you've done wrong in your life and how somehow, this feels like karma for all of it.

“I dunno,” Sunwoo shrugs, “I mean- they said it’s possible! It was on the news, and they wouldn’t lie on the news…” he nervously mumbles, scratching the back of his head. 

“That’s what’s worrying me,” you sigh, “we shouldn’t have turned on the TV.”

“It was your idea in the first place!”

“And I’ll carry the burden into my grave,” you admit, gulping as you press a forced smile onto your lips.

Momentarily looking back at the TV, you desperately want to keep the thought of the world being over out of your head before you spend your last minutes on this earth going crazy– but now that you started, you can’t keep thinking about it. “Man, the world can’t end yet. There’s so many things I haven’t tried yet! I’m too young to die!”

The men don't reply to that– you presume they’re too busy trying to find other things to occupy themselves with instead of the inevitable– which has you dissatisfied as you throw your body back into the sofa, heaving out a sigh. Seconds go by painfully slow but also painfully fast at the same time, given the circumstances, as you listen to the cheerful song playing in the background and nudge your friend into his upper arm with your pointer finger, feeling his arm encircle your shoulders and pull you closer to him. The contact of his fingers on your upper arm makes you squirm and break out into a smile, feeling a particular lightness in your stomach at the action, a sensation that has you in shock. 

“I’m gonna talk with mum before we die,” Sunwoo suddenly calls as he stands up from his seat on the floor, sighing to himself, “I can’t go with the thought of her being upset with me,” he sentimentally adds before he’s out of the door, rushing towards the living room.

The space falls into momentary silence now that your brother is gone, having you chew on your bottom lip with nerves. You think now is the time to beg for forgiveness with the higher forces– I'm sorry for not studying well. I'm sorry for being rude and ungrateful towards my mum. I'm sorry for being greedy– when the sound of Eric’s voice resonates through the place as he speaks up again, waking you up from the anxious slumber, the clock now striking 2 minutes before midnight. “What would you wanna do before you die?” he asks.

The question is simple. You presume he wants simple answers– things like getting into college, getting a good job and making a lot of money, growing old– but as you lean away from him and get back to your place on his left, your eyes locked with his, you’re left clueless. There are so many things you have yet to achieve, and the idea of not being able to pushes a burden to your chest, but at this very moment, you can’t really name one. 

Shrugging, you chew on the inside of your cheek as your eyes scan his face. His firm eye contact has you a bit flustered, making you shrivel in your seat, and as the sound of the TV morphs from the song into a countdown from 55, you’re overwhelmed with the thought that your friend is insanely pretty– and he always has been, you just hated admitting it to yourself for the past few months, despite still being fully aware– and that now, when the world ends, you’re dying unkissed and alone.

Well, not completely alone, since Eric’s here. And he’s always been here– your whole life, since you can remember, and he’s here now as well, even though he should’ve been at Juyeon’s house. As the clock strikes 30 seconds away from midnight, your eyes involuntarily travel down to his chapped lips, all air knocked out of your lungs, the thoughts in your brain picking up on speed the closer you come to the end.

You’re dying soon. You’re dying in 30- now 29 seconds, and you’ve never kissed anyone before. You’re dying before you get a chance to hold hands with someone and have a partner, and you’re dying before you get a chance to tell Eric how you feel about him. There’s 28 seconds left until the end and you’re just staring at him like a coward, because you don’t really let yourself indulge in the silly warmth of your heart whenever you’re around your friend, but god, you can at least admit it to yourself before you die.

And as the clock gets closer and closer to midnight, now only giving you 20 seconds before it all ends and a missile lands on the top of your house, blowing up the whole town and making you all disappear, Eric’s question repeats itself in your brain. What would you want to do before you die?

The answer is suddenly painfully clear as you take action– leaning towards the boy on your right, face closer to his than it’s ever been before, your eyes counting all his eyelashes and focusing on his surprised, yet unmoving face– and as you hear the countdown reach 15, you close your eyes and press your lips against his. 

The contact makes you weak in your knees as your hands reach to his face to steady him, your own firework show erupting in your stomach, and suddenly you’re completely content with dying tonight– because at least you’re with Eric, at least you did something. You kiss your friend with something close to an unsaid confession, your lips staying on his throughout the rest of the countdown, the taste of soda you’ve both been drinking the whole evening mixing in the contact of your skin. You’re not sure you’re even doing this right– again, you’ve never kissed anyone before– but it doesn’t matter to you much as you let go of your worries, aware of the fact that in a few seconds, nothing will matter anymore when neither of you are going to be around to say anything to each other after the kiss is over.

The countdown rings in your ears– coming down from 5 as you scoot yourself closer to Eric, 4 as you run the pads of your thumbs along his cheekbones, 3 as you still in your movements, 2 as you notice your knees bumping into each other on the ground and finally, 1 as you get ready to die, kissing your first and only love– when the sound of cheers and fireworks from the TV fills your ears instead, the world around you stilling and completely unchanged.

Your kiss started in 1999 and ended in 2000. Your love for him passed a century.

Eyes fluttering open and your mouth letting go of his, the image of the boy with his lips slightly parted, eyes closed and cheeks rosy comes to you in the yellow light of your room, making your heart fall down to your stomach. He looks absolutely angelic, his hair slightly messy and the fabric of his shirt a little disheveled in the front, and even though you’d love to indulge in your foolish desires and kiss him some more, you’re quickly taken aback with the noise of the door to your room opening and making you jump away from Eric, your brother appearing out of thin air in the presence of your room. It serves you like a weird kind of reality check, Eric’s eyes opening and looking at your brother, and even though you two haven’t been caught, the male clears his throat and bites down on his lower lip, looking almost guilty.

Oh no. What have you done?

Suddenly, you feel insanely silly.

JANUARY OF 2000

“You’ve been awfully quiet the whole day,” Sunwoo mumbles from beside you, his whole body engulfed in a pile of snow, “not that I care, but are you okay?”

“I thought you liked it when I don’t talk,” you mutter, playing with the frozen white all around you, seated on the red plastic sled at the top of the hill. You got tired after dragging it up from the bottom, and when you noticed that the rest of Sunwoo’s friends– Eric included– are still on their way up, you figured you could use up the time to relax and sit around for a while. It’s been quite some time since all of Sunwoo’s friends gathered to hang out at the same time, which made you surprised to see that your own brother invited you to tag along with them as they decided to go sledding on the second day of January, using up their break to best of their abilities. Which is also why you didn’t say no to the invitation– you thought sitting at home and moping around wouldn’t help you much.

“I do,” he says, nodding, “that’s why I’m asking what’s up– so I know what to do when I need to shut you up later,” Sunwoo hums, making you roll your eyes at the masked worry.

Shaking your head in disbelief, you scoff. “It’s nothing.”

“Sure,” he shrugs, “so you’re just going through puberty?” he teases, to which you take a handful of snow into your palm and lunge the white at him, satisfaction running through your veins when the snowball lands into his unsuspecting face, the male coughing and swatting his arms around to defend himself.

“Hey!” your brother screams at you once he gets the ice out of his eyes and his mouth, his body jumping into a standing position before he chases you around, the bubble of a laugh escaping your throat for the first time these days– they’re not wrong when they say malicious joy is the best kind of joy.

Running at the top of the hill, not really looking where you’re going– instead looking over your shoulder to see Sunwoo’s actions, preparing yourself to duck if he decides to turn your small quarrel into a snow fight– your legs get tangled with the red sled you left before you started a war with the angered man, a yelp cutting out of your throat as you get prepared to fall over and knock your teeth out.

Your body comes in contact with something half-firm, half-soft, and as your feet slip and the snow-covered ground disappears from below your legs, two arms wrap around your waist and steady you, making sure you don’t get hurt.

Turns out Eric Sohn is there to catch you every time you are about to eat shit. You hate this kind of deja vu.

As you open your eyes (that you had closed on instinct, not wanting to see your own death) once you’re sure you’re safe and sound, the world around you invites itself into your ears in an overwhelming noise. The laughter of Sunwoo’s friends– some hollering at your fall, some at the redness and last remains of snow covering your brother’s face– and the hushed arguments over who’s going down first– with Haknyeon screaming that he’s stealing Sunwoo’s (yours) sled and Juyeon following him. After all those happening in the matter of a few seconds,  you realize you’re left on the top of the hill alone with the male, terror shaking through your insides.

Clearing your throat and taking a step back from him, you tuck your hands into your pockets and avert your gaze from Eric. You two haven’t spoken since you decided to kiss him on New Year’s Eve, and with the awkward tension in the air, you don’t feel like doing so ever again in your whole entire life. 

“Thanks,” still, you hum.

Eric seems a little more light-hearted than you, shrugging as he replies to you. “Haven’t I told you to start watching where you’re going?”

“I’m not good with listening sometimes,” you mutter, huffing. Taking a look around yourself– noticing that there are no sleds left on the top of the hill, therefore, if you wanted to escape the situation, the only way down would be to roll around like a human version of a snowman, you once again admit your defeat, standing around nervously and shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

The silence is uncomfortable. It makes you want to dig a hole in the snow and bury yourself alive, to suffocate under the weight of the icy cold and never see Eric’s face again. You know that you ruined whatever friendship you had with the male– by being stupid and foolish, not really thinking about consequences (because there were supposed to be none and you were supposed to be dead), and the weight of the guilt makes you want to puke and hide away. 

Still, Eric comes out of his way to talk to you. Honestly, you’re kind of surprised– he should be disgusted with you. Realistically, he should be the one avoiding you, not the other way around.“They’re gonna take long to walk back up,” he notes, “wanna get hot chocolate with me?”

“I’m good, thanks,” you shake your head, not once breaking eye contact with the overwhelming white of the hill.

“Come on,” he sighs, “it’s just around the corner. They built a hot chocolate stand because they knew kids would come sledding here. Honestly, it’s an astute business tactic, but I promise the hot chocolate actually tastes nice,” he says, nudging you slightly with his arm, as if to make you look at him and change your mind.

“Thanks, but no,” you definitely say, chewing on the inside of your cheek.

“Are you avoiding me?” he asks, tone of voice casual– as if it was the most normal thing in the world, as if nothing ever happened and he was genuinely curious about the reasoning behind your actions.

“I’m not, I just don’t really like hot chocolate,” you sheepishly mutter, trying hard to avoid the topic.

“So you are avoiding me,” he hums, as if it wasn’t obvious before– and not only because you’re a bad liar. Plus, you love hot chocolate. Somehow, you think Eric knows.

“Look, Eric,” you sigh, running your hand through your hair, “can’t you just drop it?”

“No,” he shrugs, shaking his head, “and that’s why we’re talking about the reason why you’re avoiding me over a cup of hot chocolate. Let’s go.”

His persistence is terribly overwhelming sometimes. You wonder how the male does it. “I already told you-”

“You owe me for the stickers and the meal and everything,” he corners you, and you know you can’t argue with that. He’s kind of right, you suppose– you never paid him back for all the chocolates or for the free meal he brought you that one evening. And that’s exactly why you find yourself sighing as you follow him, mentally preparing yourself for the talk.

You hate how he can always get his way. Walking up to the stand, you crack your knuckles in the pocket of your jacket, nervously coming up with possible arguments to tell him. I didn’t kiss you on purpose, it was an accident. I only did it to know how it feels. We are both supposed to be dead, it’s not my fault the world didn’t end like it was supposed to! Each sentence sounds more stupid than the previous one, and so with that, you shake your head, wiping the thoughts away, smiling at the elderly lady in the stand. You’re just gonna have to be honest, you figure. 

“Two hot chocolates, please.”

Rummaging through your pockets to find your wallet– you do owe Eric, so it’s only natural for you to pay– you’re caught off guard as the male next to you swiftly takes out his own and unzips it, preparing to pay for you. 

“I thought I owed you?” you mumble, hand reaching to tug at his forearm to stop him, to which Eric only grins at you and sighs.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you have to pay,” he says.

“I think that’s exactly what that means.”

“Just take it,” he huffs as he brings out a note from his wallet, the force making something else fly out and fall to the ground with it, having the boy swiftly crouch down and pick the item up, attempting to hide it before you get a chance to see. And now, you don’t have 20/20 vision, but you recognise your face when you see it– that, and you also recognize the small white sheet to be a polaroid picture, and as far as you’re aware, you’re the only one who has a camera in his circle.

The boy hands you the drink with red-tinted cheeks. The idea of him carrying a picture of you that he took back in September makes you flush as well, and when your gloved fingers accidentally meet as you take the cup from him, he forces out a laugh. “We can talk about that after you tell me why you’re avoiding me.”

His nonchalance has you relaxing only for a few seconds. The boy walks with you as you try to heat up your cold hands on the boiling surface of the cup, and when you see a bench a few meters away from you two, you instinctively take a seat.

“So?” he becomes you, eyebrows rising as he takes a sip from the melted sweetness.

Sighing, you try to come up with the best way to go around this. Do you apologize? Do you promise to never do it again– and you won’t, even though you want to so badly and his lips look surprisingly soft today? Furrowing your brows at the war in your head, you place the cup on the bench next to you and put your head into your hands, hiding away from him when you realize the only way to do this is to be completely, utterly honest.

“I’m just so embarrassed, Eric.”

The only noise meeting your eardrums in the moment is the faint yelling of the crowd sledding in the background, your companion remaining quiet for a bit. When he sees you won’t explain yourself, he goes ahead and asks the question. “Why?”

“Do I really have to spell it out for you?” you sigh, not believing his so casual composure.

“Maybe,” he laughs, the airy sound taking all breath away from your lungs.

Well, not all of it, since you have enough oxygen to go on a tangent, it seems. “Because I kissed you, goddamnit. And- and I don’t even know why I did it, honestly, I’ve never thought of kissing you before! It’s just- when I heard the world is ending, I realized I hadn’t had my first kiss yet, and that just felt like such a miserable way to die, and then you asked what I wanted to do before I die and I couldn’t think of anything else,” you say, progressively taking out your head from your hands and facing the male, big eyes staring into his soul. 

To your surprise, he doesn’t seem mad. Or disgusted. Or any of the reactions you expected, really. Eric stares at you with a soft, but amidst a little star-struck look in his eyes, and you’re suddenly painfully aware of every slight shift in his composure.

“Did you kiss me because you wanted to kiss me, or because you thought the world was gonna end?” he asks, awaiting your answer.

And if you’re being honest, 2 days after New Year’s Eve, you do admit the thought of the world actually ending sounds a bit stupid. Why did you even believe that theory? Why did they talk about it so seriously on the news? They tricked you into ruining your own life. 

But still, nothing can be done about it now. “Both,” you admit, shrugging, “I… I kissed you because I really didn’t want to die unkissed, but also… I wanted it to be you, y’know? Like… I thought we were really going to die, and so I thought kissing you might be a nice way to go. I really wanted to spend my last moments with you, I guess,” you sheepishly say, averting your gaze from the male.

Eric offers you his silence again after you’re done explaining. While you do admit you feel a little tense to hear what he has to say, you also realize you feel lighter now that it’s out in the universe and out of your system. A major weight was taken off your shoulders with the confession, and suddenly, you’re kind of glad that your friend was so assertive and insistent on talking about this– who knows how long you’d go before managing to face him. You think you could honestly go on… forever.

Taking a sip of the luscious liquid, you feel your body warm up once the anxiousness slips away from your bones. The boy next to you hums, making you face him with expecting eyes. “Then why were you avoiding me?”

Sighing, you shake your head. “I just told you. I’m starting to think you’re the one that’s bad at listening.”

“No,” he laughs, “that’s still you. Because if you were good at listening, you’d remember me telling you that I’ve never once seen you as my younger sister.”

Shrugging, kicking the pile of snow in front of you with the tip of your winter boots, you’re not quite following. “So?”

“So you should’ve realized that I’m not doing all of this,” he theatrically swings his arms around, “for nothing, you know?”

“All of what?”

“Taking care of you. Feeding you, helping you collect those stupid animal stickers, walking you home…” he mumbles, sighing. “Keeping your picture in my wallet,” he adds with a playful tone, making you smile.

“I thought you were just being a good friend,” you shrug.

“I don’t keep a picture of your brother on me at all times,” he says, tugging off his gloves. The sleeve of his jacket rides up a little as you watch him take his cup of hot chocolate off the bench, surprised (and flooded with warmth) to see the ugly friendship bracelet you made still adorning his wrist.

Grinning to yourself, excitement welcoming itself into the tips of your fingertips, you shrug. “So?” you mirror your own question from a little while ago, wanting him to say it to you instead of relying on your own brain– you think there’s still a possibility of you just being too delusional to see the reality for what it really is. You need to make sure you’re not imagining things.

“So,” he starts, sighing to himself as he turns a little in his seat to face you, “you should stop avoiding me, because I liked the kiss. And you. And we should probably do it again, because I didn’t get the chance to kiss you back the first time,” he says, once again taking all oxygen out of your lungs with the casualty of his preposition.

Locking his eyes with you, having you two staring at each other like two rays of sunshine warming up the cold January, he grins. “How does that sound?”

“Good,” you breathe out, “very good.”

The male takes it as an invitation as he scoots himself closer to you on the bench, his body turning a bit to face you. His free hand cups your cheek, leaning closer to lock his lips with you like he asked you to, your eyes fluttering close at the proximity, the fuzzy feeling in your stomach already expecting to kiss him again. The situation feels a little too idyllic to be real, though– you should’ve expected it to get ruined again.

Something cold and wet comes into contact with the side of your face, and when you sharply open your eyes, you see Eric staring at you with shock and terror in his eyes, the snow dripping down the side of his face as well. Whoever threw the snowball has good aim, you think– managing to target two people at once (even though your faces were that close to each other that it probably wasn’t even that hard), and before you get a chance to look around and see who cut off your kiss, there’s a scream coming from the left side of the two of you, the sound of feet quickly darting in the snow landing into your ears.

“Eric Sohn, what the fuck do you think you’re doing with my sister?” the voice hollers, and before you get a chance to react, the said male fastly stands up from the bench and runs to the other direction, laughter resonating all throughout the place as Sunwoo and his friends chase their shortest friend down.

Snow starts falling as you watch your brother tail his childhood friend, and with a foreign sense of warmth, you get reminded of the birthday wish you made while blowing out the candles on your seventh birthday.

You wished for someone just like Eric. You didn’t know the universe would be so kind to give you him instead.

[the-kipsabian]

i just. wanna know some general headcanons about asagao!dan, i am very interested about this boyo- and maybe even some more fictionbang hcs if you wanna add that in? (Very cute ones pls :0)

aaaa ofc!

➭ probably the best way to describe dan in general is that hes just. like a giant puppy. hes always just happy and loves your company and is very social and just a giant ball of fluff and happiness tbh. like he pretty much just radiates all those good vibes outside all the time

➭ i think its needless to say but. MUSIC BOI. tho with dan im imagining that he does music more like his early days in the asagao canon? like imagine skyhill or northern hues instead of nsp. some starbomb sprinkled into the middle with arin tho would be fine i guess? more sfw version maybe tho➭ just in general he really love singing tbh. he’ll take every opportunity he can to sing, no matter where he is, whos around, what hes singing - he will sing. and he loves it

➭ i feel like he would also be somewhat involved with the theater stuff? even more so if they have occasional comedy/improv nights. dan is most definitely there then tbh

➭ ive also been personally headcanoning him as a fourth year student? so yeah we’ll go with that

➭ similar to the normal boots and hidden block gaming clubs, dan is likewise part of a club like that, tho its treated even more so like just a tight circle of friends than like an actual club. so hi yes there is a game grumps club in asagao fight me➭ also yes this means that the rest of the grump fam is also in this canon and nobody can convince me otherwise

➭ hes tall, hes messy (both looks-wise and with his surroundings), hes loud - but man if he isnt an open person and loving towards everyone and hes just. constantly happy. people might find him intimidating at first cause of his looks, but hes really easy to instantly like and befriend, and hes gonna treat you like a best friend right off the bat

[jikookpancakes]

JIKOOK FIC RECS that no one asked for (2021)

but im giving anyway because THE TALENT IN THIS FANDOM IS INSANE

long post incoming!! this is probably just part 1 because i wont stop reading anytime soon so i’m inserting that link just in case i do make another one in the future

What’s a Soul Really Worth, Anyway? by thisneedsmorefilth - 130k words, fantasy, demon!jm, witch!jk, listen, this and the next one are my top 2 jikook fics of all time, so well-written, plot so exciting legit reads like a book, better than a lot of books tbh, the world-building is INSANE, jungkook and the gang accidentally summon demon!jimin and chaos ensue, especially for jungkook...and you know why!!!, so funny, angsty, cried so much, happy ending but listen to me: you gotta read the sequel too, YOU GOTTA.

Militat Omnis Amans: The Beginnings by edaen - 92k words, fantasy, werewolf!jk, vampire!jm, forbidden love, super slow burn but super worth it, JIKOOK IN THIS IS MY FAVORITE JIKOOK IN ANY FIC EVER EVER EVER, this is the ultimate all or nothing will freeze hell over for the other kind of love, and the way this is written is just so... how do i describe it. like you can just tell the author wanted to be very realistic with their feelings. you’ve seen the word count, this is SLOW burn. like you will legit feel their struggle to just be able to love each other and while it hurts, it’s also SO GLORIOUS. i love this one so much and if you like reading angst with happy ending but like cranked up to 200% then read this. bonus feels if you read the whole series

Until Dawn (series) by edaen - this is the long series where the previous one above is part of. highly rec if you love fantasy and you wanna read about bts being a rag tag group of supernatural beings fighting evil yay. also it makes the above fic more satisfying because you see more of jikook just being tgt and in love (with bonus angst because of course)

7 Signs by NamHyora - 27k words, secret spies au, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm who is always used as a raven in their operations aka they use jimin and his attractive self to attract people and gather information or acquire targets and all that spy stuff, and his bestie alpha jk is not too happy about it hehe, friends to lovers, iove this one so much i wish it was longer but i think the author is planning to write a sequel!

Drop Like Confetti by annie_vi - 110k words, ceo!jk, age difference, age swap, ahhh i love this fic so much cause jimin smart and mature and has this no bs attitude, and he can keep up with jk despite the age gap and the difference in status/experiences, jk sexy dilf in this one eheh, i love it cause the drama/angst tackles a very real concern for such couples, like there’s no angst just for the sake of having angst, it really makes sense where they’re both coming from, they’re so whipped for eo too so love that for me

Fold it Up Like Origami by annie_vi - 99k words, gamer!jk, model!jm, same author as above and jk is so boyfriend goals in this one and in all this author’s fics in general like wow my standards are so high now i will legit be single forever just reading jikook fics (with no regrets), secret relationship due to their celeb status, well-written as usual, dialogues/banter in this author’s fics are just YES

The Tournament by kinkmins - 34k words, prince!jm, bodyguard!jk, abo, i’ll paste part of the summary here “Prince Jimin gets ready to hold a tournament where 50 alphas compete for a chance to court him, his father the king hires a new bodyguard who is a little too blunt and a little too talkative.“, i really love this oneeeee

Screwed Up and Brilliant by annie_vi - 113k words, escort!jk, jimin needed a date for a work event and in comes jungkook, escort extraordinaire with a no sex rule and jimin is just dasdkjfhasl, a lot of that “is this real or is he just acting” kinda angst, fluff smut angst

Like Everything Glows by annie_vi - 180k words, merman!jm, aquatic vet!jk, ok this is like my 4th rec from this author just read all their fics you’re welcome, this is their first fantasy fic but soso good, i rec’d this to someone who doesn’t really read fics and she really loved it and said “their love is so pure hhh”, she’s right

Track one: I love you by honeydice - 30k words, they’re “just” best friends, lots of pining it hurts, there’s some yoonmin and mentioned past jinmin in this so just noting in case, angst, denial of feelings, siiiiigh

InYou by edaen - 4k words, pwp :), abo, the morning after jikook mating, more sexytimes ensue + fluff

Falling For You Again by Rose_gold715 - 30k words, amnesia au, jk forgets about jimin and idk just something about this hits right in the feels. btw i don’t support the jk hated jm before in real life agenda so i don’t like this fic for that reason but i like this fic because i love me some good painful angst with happy ending.

The President’s Son by AmeliaBedelia - 55k words, bodyguard!jk, president’s son!jm, jk is assigned to shadow jm bc his life is under threat, and things develop :), jm is jk’s gay awakening :) :)

A Touch of Sin by pettey - 102k words, fantasy au, police officer!jk, supernatural!jm, shamanism, LOOK AT THE RANGE OF JIKOOK WRITERS YALL, this is such an interesting concept, so different from every other fic i’ve read, really well-written, sometimes you come across fics and you cant help but go “someone out there rly blessing me with this art for free”

Tears to the Tide by haromame - 65k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, honestly there’s not a lot of abo elements it’s focused more on jungkook having ptsd as he just came from war, established relationship jikook, he comes back home to jimin and things have just... changed. except their love ok THEY LOVE EO SO MUCH this made me cry so f much ugh so good tho.

Zero Hour by edaen - 5k words, canon compliant, a little drabble based around rosebowl jikook, it’s part of a series/collection of canon compliant jikook so if you’re looking for more canon compliant here you go!!, also if you can’t tell already i tend to like several things from a single author, i haven’t read their other fics im legit saving for sad days but i am confident enough to say their other fics are also rec-worthy.

Wonder by wordcouture - 7k words, im sorry in advance, mcd :( pls take care of yourself, i don’t like sad endings ok i don’t, but this is so popular and i was like, ok let’s see what the hype is all about, i get it now, :((((((((((((((((((((, well-written tho, bc the author will manage to crush your heart in just 7k words ha ha

The Omega Revolution by PinkBTS  - 158k words, abo, alpha!jk omega!jm, dystopian au, the hunger games more specifically mockingjay vibes, angst with happy ending but there’s some...things... lost along the way and i think that’s realistic for a dystopian war au, well-written

Blind Switch - 226k words, jockey!jk, rich spoiled brat!jm, jm gets exiled to his grandparents ranch where he meets jk yeehaw, im sorry for the yeehaw, anyway fluff smut angst enemies friends to lovers hurt/comfort slow burn happy ending, all the good stuff, ugh jk so boyfriend goals, also the amount of fluff in the later chapters thank u writer

Finally by Rose_gold715 - 12k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, angst with happy ending, jikook mate out of convenience and jimin runs away from jk and his pack feeling unloved and outcasted, but jungkook goes after him :((

Park Jimin’s Guide to Good Housekeeping by Ashlyn17 - 235k words, fantasy au, when i say jikook has the best fic writers i mean jikook has the best fic writers because THE WORLD-BUILDING in this one?, THE PLOT TWIST?, yesyesyes, jungkook is a powerful fae and jimin is assigned to be his housekeeper hehe, listen my entire fic rec has several that could be great netflix shows and this is definitely one of them

A Spell That Reminds Me of Your Name by Chimneycricket - 42k words, wizards!au, enemies to friends to lovers and the development felt natural, well-written plus the author sometimes makes art of their fics and other jikook fics and posts on twitter, both their fics and art are so good, i’ve heard good stuff about their other fics too :)

that’s it for now!

just a quick one about my preferences: idc about tops/bottoms, i read just about anything but i prefer fantasy and multi-chaptered fics, i love established relationship jikook so hmu with recs anytime, i don’t like reading anything with cheating and mcd, i love fics where jk and jm are just so friggin in love they are just IT for eo, and at the end of the day even if there are elements to the fics i wouldn’t normally read, as long as they’re well-written then i’m all for it

[anne-i-write]

moriarty the patriot headcannons

| requested by anon: can you write headcanons for moriarty brothers meeting and having dinner with s/o's parents for the first time? and s/o's father is overprotective. thanks 🤍🙆🏻 |

william x reader; louis x reader; albert x reader

word count: 1857

tw: mentions of toxic behavior in albert’s hcs

a/n: IM BACK AND THRIVING BBS!!! it’s so good to be back again to writing!!! hhh i’m so sorry if this is far from what you wanted but i hope you all enjoy it nonetheless!!!! lowkey went off the railings w this one so 👀 also if i missed any tags, please let me know!!!!!

william: 803 words

it had been you and your father since you were younger bc your mom was the “lucky” choice of some noble

but you wouldn’t have it any other way

you two are very close and everyone in the town knows

that, and that you both hate nobles

so it’s no surprise when the moriartys move into town, you’re both less than pleased

you always try your best to avoid them whenever they come into your town and your father always begs his friends to take the nobles as customers, despite the fact it could be good for business

but the town you lived in was particularly small and you did end up bumping into william

literally

some stupid man didn’t see you crossing the road and you were nearly crushed by the carriage if it hadn’t been for the hand that pulled at your wrist

“i swear people these days don’t know how to drive carriages.”

you don’t know who you were expecting

BUT ANYONE BUT A NOBLE

“are you alright?”

“i’m fine thank you—“

you’re absolutely flustered

how did i not know that this was a noble??? he smells so clean!

“i’ve got to be on my way now!” and you left william there with no explanation

but lil did you know he actually knew who you were

or to an extent, you weren’t as sneaky as you’d hoped you’d be

he saw you hiding in corners and alleyways every time you two accidentally made eye contact

and some of the townsfolk actually told him a little about you and your father so he understood why you weren’t too welcoming

but to take great lengths to avoid him??? he is very intrigued

so he starts off small, trying to send you a kind smile before you dart off behind a fruit stall

he really tries his best to get close to you and after a few weeks (and a few persuasive friends), he finally gets to hold a conversation with you

and boy does he fall FAST

it takes a while but you finally reciprocate his feelings and he thinks its smooth sailing from there right???

lmao everyone knows your father is literally the most intimidating looking man that could ever walk the earth

if they didn’t know him personally, they would be afraid of getting curb stomped 🤠

i mean,, he’s a big softie but god forbid anyone even DARES to look at you in a romantic light

you warn william of this and he’s like “don’t worry love, it shouldn’t be too bad”

it is bad

even william has cold hands bc your father is giving him the dirtiest look

dinner isn’t even dinner it’s a grill with how much questions your father is asking him

it does NOT help that he’s a noble

“so,,, you’re a noble”

“your cooking is amazing sir”

your father leaves the table for a little bit and you can hear the quiet sigh of relief from william

“i’m sorry for my father”

“no, no,,, i just,,, your father’s really intimidating, isn’t he?”

you let out a chuckle and william relaxed, a soft smile gracing his lips

“he can be, but it’s just something he does.” you threw a wistful gaze at the door your father disappeared before.

“he’s just worried about you, i can see it. he doesn’t want you around people like me.” you grabbed his hand over the table and he gently squeezed your hand.

“if anything, if he’d give you a chance, he’d want me to be with you. noble or not”

you both continue to have a delightful conversation, your sweet laughs filling the room

however, you didn’t know your father was listening in on your conversation and he couldn’t agree more with william

your mother left with more than just a curt goodbye and unshed tears

she left you with a tear stained letter filled with sorrowful regrets and sincere apologies

he knew you would eventually grow up to be critical of the world and if you were to find out that your mother had left unwillingly, he was afraid that you would be too bitter towards the world

but as he hears your laugh and his worries are dulled down a little

he sees you smiling so happily at william and when he chances a glance at the noble beside you, his worries are completely erased

william’s looking at you the same way everyone swore he looked at your mother

it’s a gentle gaze filled with love and kindness, one that he knew could protect you and take care of you

your father hated nobles and hovered over you when it came to love

but he couldn’t help but hold back on questions when he came back and you instantly noticed that your father took a liking william

louis: 508 words

everyone knew you as “Little Noble” in your town

the sole reason being your father literally treating you like a noble lmao

he gave you the best of everything he could afford and tried his best to not let you do any work

tried

of course, you were a little angel and you HAD to help otherwise you’d cry about making someone else tired when you could’ve easily helped

you’ve carried this trait until your early twenties and there were no signs that you would stop

hence why you were bringing home some fresh fruits from the stall clerk before a man bumps into you

you were so caught off guard that your knee buckled and you fell on your butt

everyone was stunned into silence as you fell but louis was so apologetic

so when he helped you back up, he felt the chilling stares of the town burning into his back

and then you apologize for bumping into him when he was the one who bumped into you and you fell??????

“please, let me make you something! i feel so bad!”

he tries to decline but there was this odd pressure to say yes to you

he ends up going home with you

you’re both in front of the door before your father opens it, his eyes wide

“who is this boy?”

“oh, i didn’t get his name on the way here. what is your name?”

your poor father’s heart is pounding way too fast for his liking

“oh! look at that, thank you so much for bringing my child home! you should be going home now”

he tries to shut the door on louis but you hold it open and beckon louis inside

“i invited him here! i accidentally bumped into him earlier so i offered to make him something!”

louis is so awkward pls

your father reluctantly lets him in but gives him a side eye the whole time he’s in the house

“does your child do this often?”

“why? do you find it strange?”

YOUR FATHER IS SO PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE PLEASE SAVE LOUIS

anyways, you finish making your treat and give it to louis, your father glaring at your interaction

louis is still a little stiff but the more you talk to him, his guard is let down a little

soon enough he has to leave and you wish him well

he leaves with a wave and a kind smile and you look over at your father who had been scowling since you appeared at the front door

“he is a bit cute, don’t you think father?”

your father sputters, stunned by your bold claim

“y-you’re still too young to think about men like that!”

you laugh and shut the front door, teasing your poor father about finding love while also wondering if you would meet louis again

as you talk with your father behind closed doors, louis smiles to himself as he thinks about the unusual encounter today

surely, if i met them again tomorrow, it would make for a pleasant day

albert: 546 words

he meets your father before he meets you

it was during a ball your parents organized in order to connect with the more prestigious nobles around you

your parents were obsessed with the way your family was viewed and apparently being an earl wasn’t enough

so albert hears about you when your father boasts about how you’re the perfect child who answered to his every beck and call

in all honesty, albert was disgusted

no one deserved to be brought up like that

he casually makes his way into the conversation and your father is seething

“my child is your age, it’s a shame you act like this, i would have thought of you as a prime husband for them”

who is this earl to tell him what to do?

needless to say your father crosses him off of the guest list for the next ball

days go by and your father doesn’t know that you’re currently in town, doing what you can to help the working class as best as you can

it is on one particular day of visiting an orphanage do you run into the eldest moriarty brother

you two exchange polite greetings and you both pause

“your father is the earl, is he not?”

“you are a general of the army, are you not?”

a brief mention of your father and your mood dulls slightly

“yes, but i’m here on my own accord”

he would kill you if he found out you were amongst the “filth” as he called them

“well, i’ve brought books for the children, would you like to help me read some to them?”

he seemed sincere enough to not want anything more from you, so you agreed

he was actually very pleasant to be around and you find yourself enjoying his company

the meetups continued to happen and soon enough, albert finds himself standing in front of the doors to your family estate

your father is not pleased at all

“it’s nice to meet you again, sir”

“i didn’t forget about what you said to me at our first meeting”

and you’re sitting there like,, ????? they’ve met??? and your father doesn’t like albert???????

of course, inviting albert to your home would have repercussions but you didn’t expect your father to be so hostile

he was always hostile towards other nobles unless they were of higher importance than him

but for him to hate albert so quickly and openly??? this was quite new

you had mentioned that your father has always been one for power so it was clear to albert that you obviously grew up in a home that was more,,, toxic than protective

it was at dinner that this behavior reached its peak and albert despised the atmosphere and the way your father treated you

“i’ve come here to ask for your child’s hand in marriage”

your father rejects the idea without any hesitation

“i refuse to have them live the rest of their life in your household when they could do so much better”

when you invited albert that night, you knew there would be repercussions with your father

but what you didn’t expect was that you would leave your father and adopt the moriarty name as your own, the family welcoming you with open arms

moriarty the patriot taglist: @zoehanji