#hey sexy...

[shrimpscocktail]

teaser for the comedy central roast of rob lowe (with roast master david spade)

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

[missmitchieg]

I love how Pen gets exactly what she wants from Colin when she... Just starts asking him for what she wants.

She asked Colin for a kiss, so he gave her a kiss and immediately realized he's obsessed with her and confessed his love while on his knees.

She told Colin she would very much like to be more than friends, so he *checks notes* ferociously made out with her while groping her bosom, fingerblasted her to the Moon and Saturn, and then proposed marriage.

Incredible what you get when you ask for what you want, huh?

[moodstabilizr]

howwouldyouliketoridehomeonarealcowboyigotasixpackofcoldonesoniceandmyroomiesoutallnightsoyoucanscreammynameasloudasyouneedtosugar

[rystiel]

bro’s objectifying that mullet man again

[laniidae-passerine]

positively obsessed with how Rockstar Lestat is the exact kind of guy one of my friends would show me a picture of and swear he’s really sexy and cool and brilliant. Whole time I’m thinking “oh dear GOD” staring at a trainwreck weirdo and wondering what’s happened to everybody else that is absolutely missing me. jesus christ he’s blond

[alpacinosgf]

Colin Farrell as Oswald 'Oz' Cobb

THE PENGUIN (2024) Cent'Anni

[insidekatmind]

nsfw alphabet of jobe bellingham

Request: done

Wearning: +18,smut, english is not my first language

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Jobe is so sweet. He will take care of you immediately and always apologize for fear that he has gone too far but you will reassure him that it was perfect.

Jobe will fill you with sweet kisses and caresses

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jobe loves your beautiful face and smile that always helped him when he was sad.

He also loves your butt and boobs, in fact he can’t do at least to admire your body especially when you wear something tight.

He loves his smile because you once told him that his smile always made you feel good. He also loves his hair because he loves when you stroke him and scratch or pull them for a joke

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He likes to come inside you and in your mouth

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He likes to fuck in his car

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He has not much experience: you were his first time but both you are misunderstand what you like and what you do not like together. But he sure makes you feel very good

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He loves it when you are on top of him and you ride his cock so he can look at you, nibble your neck, suck your nipples and put his hands on your hips to guide you with the movements and especially love your expressions.

J = Jack off (handjob headcanon)

He doesn’t do it often since you started having sex

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

loves dirty words and especially loves when you praise him saying that it is making you feel good

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

in his bed, on his sofa, in your bed and especially in his car

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

The intense kisses or when you provoke it

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

anything that could actually hurt you

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He likes to get blowjobs but also loves to eat your pussy

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

At first when you started having sex it was always sweet and slow for fear that it would hurt you but then you assured him that everything would be fine and then he began to fuck you harder and rough

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

She loves quickies especially if you do them before leaving home

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He doesn’t like to take risks: he will definitely give you a kiss, touch your thigh but he would be too afraid to fuck in a public place because they might find out.

But he loves to have sex in his car in a safe place where no one would come or in a dark parking lot where no one would see you.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He lasts long enough

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He likes to groan and grunt especially when you give him a blow job

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Long and big enough to make you enjoy

[gleafer]

Hello. And when, there will be finished sketches with the characters??

(Furfur and Shax, Muriel, Beelzebub and Crowley/Aziraphel, Gabriel?))

I expect your work in patreon.)

Oh myyyy! May this tide you over!

Link to Purplemoonpagan’s fic that this was originally created for!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59449948

[princessbrunette]

would bountyhunter!rafe ever comfort you when you’re crying about missing home?

i feel like he’d be weirded out the first couple times but eventually it’d be normal for you to fall asleep in his arms

｡•┈🎀┈• ｡ﾟ

yeah, he acts all reluctant about it but he’s not totally emotionless or anything. there is a weight of guilt on his chest when he sees you all curled up by the window at the shitty little motel the two of you were holed up in. he’d been out to get a bottle of whisky — treating himself after all the strife he’d been putting himself through with this whole bounty hunting thing.

as soon as he arrives back into the room you jump up, like you’re scared of being caught crying. quickly, you paw at your eyes — sniffing up as much snot as you can as you face him nervously, swaying on your feet with wide eyes like you were expecting him to be furious with you. he slows his pace, eyeing you over.

“you were crying?” he asks as if it’s not obvious and you look away, swiping beneath your eye once more.

“jus’ had something in my eye.” you croak, heart pounding with the realisation that lying might just get you in more trouble. “dont be mad.” you utter quietly like a prayer.

“i’m not—” he realises he projected his voice just a tad too loud because you tense up, and he sighs— pushing his floppy hair out of his face. “i’m not mad. i just want to know why. was — was it me? did i say some dumb shit?” he approaches you carefully, holding his hands up when you cower slightly to show he comes in peace.

“no.” you shake your head quickly. the last thing you wanted to do was accuse him of anything, grateful of the fact he’d somewhat treated you fairly despite being the one to steal you from your land. “i… i feel homesick. i miss my father… and i miss the barn, and my sheep, and all my chickens. i miss my horse and the cows. i’m so far from home.” you stare out the window, fat droplets wobbling on the precipice of your eye.

rafe sighs, scratching at his cheek awkwardly — unsure of what he’s supposed to say. after all you were homesick because of him. he wasn’t supposed to like you, nor were you particularly supposed to like him — but there had been moments of comfort you’d found in eachother, oddly enough — and now he had really grown attached to you, debating marrying you to keep you for himself.

“yeah…” he drawls, nodding and staring at the back of you for a moment as he perches on the edge of the bed. “shit, look— c’mere.” he beckons, and you do so. you suppose you’re just being obedient to stay out of trouble, but it was undeniable that you craved his comfort. craved him.

he pulls you to sit on his leg, a hand supporting your back. “suppose i should apologise for all… this. i— i didn’t wanna have to take anyone okay it’s… its just my dad is a very powerful man. my whole life i’ve been second best to my sister and… i wanted to show him that i could do what he does. now i’ve done the job and — and it has these real life consequences and i don’t enjoy that trust me, but… what’s done is done. i’ve got you now. i… will get you a new barn. a better one. with more sheep and cows and shit. alright?”

maybe you were too empathetic, because in that moment for the first time you felt kind of sorry for rafe. he wasn’t as big and scary as he usually was. he actually seemed kind of lonely, and insecure. it wouldn’t undo the hurt he’s caused, the fact that it was very unlikely you’d see your father again — but it brought you some comfort to know you were hurting together. you sniffle, nodding in understanding and he sighs again, pulling you into him. “c’mon. stop that.” he jogs his leg a little, comforting you like you were a baby, the only way he knew how.

｡•┈🎀┈• ｡ﾟ

[slurmdog]

modern businessman luo binghe is having a bad day - he's running late to his next meeting, his car broke down, his apartment has a leak, and he has mud on his shoes while walking to an important interview.

that's why when someone wolf whistles and goes, "hey sexy, need a ride?" he feels like he's going to unleash the fury of the gods on that person for catcalling him on, perhaps, the worst day of his adult life

binghe turns on his heel and walks up to the open window of the mediocre car that pulled up - the driver's face overcome with an ashen pallor the closer he gets - and suddenly realizes that this is the most beautiful man he's ever met. so then binghe finds himself leaning on the open windowframe and twirling his hair going, "yes, actually,"

the driver looks behind binghe and winces. binghe gives him his best eyes and the driver says, "i meant, um..."

"your jokes aren't funny, shen yuan," a woman says behind binghe, and then she gets into the backseat. binghe is strangely dismayed - the driver who must be shen yuan must've been catcalling her as a joke, not him. shen yuan meets his eyes, inexplicably blushes, and gestures at the unlocked passenger door.

binghe gets in. he bats his eyelashes at shen yuan and blithely gives the address of the building he's interviewing at, makes conversation, then gives shen yuan his number and name on the way out.

[ning yingying climbs from the back seat to the front passenger without opening the doors (sue her! it's a sketchy warehouse area!) and says to shen yuan, "so he's probably a murderer, right?"]

[spaciebabie]

SMALL SPRINGTRAP DOODLE 2 CELEBRATE FINALLY ESCAPING ART BLOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT MIND THE WEIRD DIALOGUE I HAD FREE SPACE AND DIDNT KNOW WHAT TA DO W/IT

[andthendk]

Drawing DC characters: Rose Wilson

- requested by frens -

(does she look like she has enough daddy issues 😂)

[thunderglade]

loading my 22 caliber gun but instead of bullets it fires trigun art

[wolverinesprincess]

old man!logan knowing you’re crazy about him, knowing he can make you melt or see stars, knowing you need him and only him is so personal to me

[sketchytea]

belated birthday present for a friend with our old ocs as shadow dragons 🐉 we already had a tevinter/orlesian au for them ages ago. then veilguard dropped, and we thought they'd be a good fit for the shadows ✨