#hetcanons

[scandalousadventures]

I am the only person on tumblr, nay, EARTH, that believes Benny New Vegas is heterosexual

[hexhomos]

Im so sad rn I wanna cry

It's honestly not that bad just remember that last time they did an universe update it basically took 5-6 years to actually 'update' everything, a lot of was still left not updated, Arcane season 2 is confirmed to be only in the last quarter of NEXT YEAR, and overall, when has new hetcanon ever stopped the drive of some good fag4fag guerrilla artwork?

never, is when.

In many ways this move is actually going to preserve all the past leagueverse vkjc stuff in amber so that it now exists separately to this new vision. Even more reason to get people actually using the vikjayce/jayvik split to differentiate what they're doing.

[straighttpp]

juno wears this

[straighthzd]

Nil’s backstory is that bandits chased his mother off a cliff when he was a child

[straightwtnv]

The Heterofication Union, So far

@straighttpp

@straighttma

@straightwtnv

@straightcriticalrole

@thehetcanisms

@straightarsparadoxica

@straightw359 

@thesandersstraights

@straightstarshipiris

@straighttaz

@straighta81

[straighttoh]

emperor belos is the fandom’s Tumblr Sexyman and he was wholeheartedly intended to be. it was a marketing ploy. his entire character arc culminates in this.

unsurprisingly, it meets with resounding success. he surpasses bill cipher. he surpasses the onceler. fanfiction counts soar after his unmasking. there is no escape.

[straightsf]

hello dear followers! it is time for the

✨official straightla firma CW cast listing!✨

david-7, portrayed by white man of the month

trexel geistman, portrayed by some dude

hartro piltz, portrayed by sexy woman #7

bathin, portrayed by the crying cat meme

imogen, portrayed by... is- is that supposed to be a woman? we didn’t actually have the money for more trained actors so this will have to d-

✨please don’t send us hate for this we (as in, i, mod david) worked very hard on putting this together <33✨

[thehetcanisms]

Tim has short hair 😔.

No!!! His abundance of gender is stored in the hair!

[straightw359]

eiffel grabs minkowski and kisses her to “shut her up” when she’s yelling at him for something. this is presented as cute and romantic

Ew ew ew kill it with fire

[sixthestraightsical]

THE HETERIFICATION BLOGS ARE TAKING OVER

[straightcriticalrole]

hey u know how crit role is pretty damn good about how gay it is? what if it wasnt?

inspired by @straighttpp and @straighttma and massive shoutout to the adhd/autistic crit role server for all the awful ideas!

[voidoftetris]

After reading through the straighttpp blog I have come to the conclusion that in that universe Valles Vicky’s Vixen Valley is just straight up a Hooter’s. Rita gets mocked for being uncomfortable and does not change her mind. Juno makes several sexual comments before they’ve even finished talking to whatever two-dimensional girl they replace Todd with.

Anyway happy birthday Juno and Benzaiten Steel, I will spend this day alternating between crying and laughing at cursed concepts that nobody in my house understands in your honour. <3

[straighttpp]

Cishet Juno is voiced by Adam Sandler

[straighthzd]

There are romance options, but only with the male characters

[straightwtnv]

Carlos goes to the Desert Otherworld for being gay after he confessed to Cecil. He’s neither seen nor heard from again. Also, the entire time he’s confessing Cecil looks like he’s trying very hard not to say something wildly homophobic.

i see were still not over supernatural

[straighttoh]

luz and hunter are actually together but nothing else changes and they still hate each other just as much as they did at the beginning of “hunting palismen”