#hes not actually a dilf
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pumpkingas · 2 months ago
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I actually need to be restrained, I accidentally bumped into my dilf coworker's belly while walking past him and got so incredibly flustered. It was so soft and he's always in my personal space and a bit too friendly iykwim but he's never broken any boundaries so it's weirdly hot to me. I need to know what he'd feel like on top of me...
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iamthe-walnut · 11 months ago
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Adam redesign from Hazbin Hotel for fun. I hated this guy in the first episode but he rlly grew on me over time and became my 2nd favorite character. I wish he had more screentime, he had so much story potential, from his lore with being the first man and the his relationships with other characters. We could have had it all 😔 Hazbin hotel is good...but the pacing is rlly my main issue
I made a redesign cuz I wasn't rlly vibing with the fact that he looks like a demon and swears alot even tho he's suppose to be an angel. I think you can be more subtle with the idea that "heaven or angels are hypocrites" rather than making them act exactly like the demons🤷‍♀️ So in my reimagining, yeah he doesn't look like a demon but a priest/bishop vibe, he's still a misogynistic asshole and can either be upfront or backhanded with it depending on his mood. He doesn't swear but rather uses other more family friendly words to replace swear words but when he's pissed he won't care about censoring himself anymore.
I'm gonna do Lute next but that's it.
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starlightseraph · 9 months ago
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oughghghffgghhggg
(series 8, episode 22 • “Everybody Dies”)
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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 2 months ago
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finished my exam and now i’m thinking abt dilfguru (the collective s/o of all suffering uni students)……. thinking about how he would wait outside your exam hall and greet you with the warmest smile + pat on the head once you walk out . hands you a paper cup of coffee and a bag with a pastry (your reward for working so hard <3) and leads you to his car with a hand on your lower back ….. drives you somewhere fun if you’re up for it but if you’re all tuckered out he brings you back to his apartment and sits down with you by the couch . soooo much praise he’s so sick
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iheartjameshetfield · 1 year ago
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lord forgive me for i am about to sin 🙏🙏
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i truly believe that during this specific era, james had the biggest size kink. so big it would drive him feral.
he’s just obsessed with making you seem small just so that he could take care of you in every way possible. he loves how his large hands can cover up almost your entire torso when he’s holding you, fucking into you.
he loves seeing his bulge appear in your stomach. it just makes him fuck you even deeper, wanting to see how big the bulge could get. or the way he rests his elbows on each side of you, trapping you and you try to claw onto him.
whenever you suck him off, he always has to bring his cock to your face, comparing you to him as he wonders how the fuck were you supposed to put all that in your mouth?? he spits over your lips, bringing his hand down to grab your jaw, forcing your mouth open with his thumb, making you suck on it. after he pulls his thumb out, he’d bring his tip, smearing his precum against your lips before motioning for you to open your mouth, tapping his cock on your tongue.
he couldn’t wait anymore, so without any warning, he thrusts himself into your mouth, making you gag. he sees the mark of your lipstick near his base, he lets out a breathy moan. you bring up both of your hands to stroke him, wanting him to feel as good as possible. he loves pulling out paint your face, wanting to make you look as messy as possible with your unruly hair and runny mascara and smeared lipstick. he spreads his cum all over your face, feeding some of it to you.
he remembers the time you wanted to be the one on top for once. you had never tried this position with him yet. he was so gentle, murmuring sweet words of encouragement. you were sat on top of him, knees on each side as you stroke his cock. when you’re ready, he has his hands on your hips, lifting you so he could set you on his dick very slowly. the sight was almost comedic, seeing your eyes pop out as you hiss from the stretch.
“it’s okay, sweet girl, take your time.”
you whine and whimper when you finally take all of him, causing james to groan as he brings his hand to the bulge that appeared in your stomach, rubbing his hand there and around your tummy. you were so tight around him, and he tried his hardest to resist the urge from fucking you at an inhuman pace, but with the way you were clenching around him, he couldn’t take it slow much longer.
he got up from the couch, effortlessly carrying you with him as he cradled you with one arm, and the other rests beside your head against the wall as he fucks mercilessly into you. you cry out, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as you muffle the sounds of your whines into the crook of his neck. it didn’t take long for the both of you to cum. he brings the hand that was resting against the wall and uses it to stroke your hair, mumbling sweet words as he peppers you kisses,
“you did so good for me, princess. i didn’t hurt you, did i?” he coos.
he continues to baby you, setting you on the couch to clean the cum from his thighs and from you. he lays down on the couch next to you, bringing you into his arms as you both fall asleep, his arm wrapping around the entirety of you.
this absolutely sucked i’m sorry but i just needed to get this out of my system.
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andy-clutterbuck · 9 months ago
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𝐀𝐧𝐝𝐲'𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐓𝐎𝐖𝐋 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐞
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auspicioustidings · 1 year ago
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Someone pls either write or direct me to a 'you wake up in Vegas having married stranger John Price who was totally sober and just agreed with your drunken proposal and now he's fully treating you like his wife and is talking about raising your children in England because it's safer there and referring to you as the missus whenever possible' thank you in advance
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karalija · 10 months ago
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Hodari Pavel from the mmo game Palia by Singularity 6. This is based off a certain quest 🤭😉 drawn in procreate. Please enjoy! 🖤💜🖤
Go read FairehavenMaven’s fic “A Hidden Gem” on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51257176/chapters/129513127
Such a beautiful fic. Well written, spicy and inspiring… just *chef’s kiss*
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anakinstwinklebunny · 10 months ago
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Dad selfie vibes
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kaisadraws · 7 months ago
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i just needed to get this out of my chest
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qhostcaptain · 1 year ago
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i think ben spinning caps swagger stick is the cutest thing in the world oh my god i adore him so much what a man
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kazuaru · 11 months ago
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Just an android assassin & their dilf handler.
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greedybeans · 10 days ago
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not to be horny on main but why is everyone looks so sexy in season 8?? did i not pay attention before??? like understandably eddie serves the most cunt this season with the gay stache and the hair strand. BUCK?? he looks edible. The curls are curling. Clothes actually fit. We are not talking about the caked tits though. i am looking with absolutely ZERO respect. In fact i have no pants on.
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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 2 months ago
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i want dilfguru to pick me up after uni and drive me back to his fancy apartment please god
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beneath-the-willow-tree · 1 month ago
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Okay yeah the idea of old man Daniel verbally eviscerating Marius in the show is all well and good. But what I really need when they meet is for Marius to immediately develop a Complex about Armand’s latest paramour looking older than him.
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fbfh · 7 months ago
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just woke up from a baby dream and I'm a sobbing wreck :) anyway Logan Huntzberger doesn't expect much from his future besides monetary success, partying, and a lot lot lot of sex. he definitley doesn't expect to look up one day and realize he's sharing a home, a life with someone. not only that, but he's the one that instigated it. he told you in college he didn't like you being around other guys. he stopped caring about the girls that he would go between, because now he just seems to care about you. everything else falls to the sidelines. so he comes back to his big fancy house after an important business meeting on the golf course, and he sees you there. some old sitcom is marathoning on tv, and you're wrapped up in fluffy blankets, hair up and out of your face. you look so cozy, so comfortable. you keep adjusting the blankets, fussing with them as you hum softly. he walks closer, overcome with a feeling of love and swelling pride and... paternal instinct he's never felt. your son Henry, just a month or two old is bundled on your arms. you look up at Logan and smile so warmly he could cry just from the look on your face when you see him.
"hi," you breathe softly. Henry's settled down, so you don't want to rile him up too much, but he's not all the way asleep.
"hey ace," he breaths, sitting next to you. he wraps you in his arms and kisses you, meeting forgotten as you both admire you baby boy together. you rub his tummy gently, soothingly, and Logan smooths his hair. it's short and fuzzy, and a little prickly. it makes him laugh softly. Henry is wearing the white and blue onesie Honor got for him at the baby shower. he makes a mental note to take some pictures to send her of him wearing it. the soft fabric of his polo shirt and the smell of his cologne mixed with the distinct remnants of golf course air is so comforting. he watches you admire your son, trace the shape of his cute little nose, copy the faces he makes, babble little noises at him. he watches you smooth his hair and help him get comfortable in your arms, watches you place your finger in his hand so he can hold onto it with that surprisingly strong baby death grip. Henry wiggles around, getting comfortable in your arms, and you kiss his forehead again. once you're sure that he's settled, not too warm and not too cold, comfortable and lying safely, you can finally relax. you rest your head on Logan's shoulder, closing your eyes and finally letting yourself relax and rest a little. you take in a big deep breath of his masculine scent, somehow both spicy and refreshing, and sigh. you're content. you're more than content, he realizes. you're happy. Logan... made you happy. he found out what you wanted and built you a life you want, a life he wants. it hits him like a ton of bricks in one overwhelming, amazing moment, and he soaks in the feeling, watching the way your sleeping babys face and yours mirror each other.
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