#hes literally like. 19. all of them were high schoolers when they met. he was a neglected and probably abused foster kid

[d1scordantmelody]

do you think people who think frank is some kind of evil overlord have ever listened to teeangers by mcr

[d-criss-news]

20 Questions With Darren Criss: How Acting Has Helped Him Make New Music

While Darren Criss has graced our TV screens with a range of characters, from high schooler Blaine Anderson on Glee to serial killer Andrew Cunanan on The Assassination of Gianni Versace, he was last spotted just being himself, on our For You Page on TikTok. “I’m walking to rehearsal with a guitar on my back with a Trader Joe’s bag ... I did not bring an umbrella because I forgot that it was raining. I’m rocking that NYC musician life,” the Glee alum explained in the hilarious clip posted three days ago.

While Criss’ acting work has earned him acclaim and stardom, he leaned into making music during the pandemic. On Aug. 20, he dropped a new EP, Masquerade, featuring five new tracks that Criss says were inspired by the different characters Criss has embraced throughout his career. After Criss wrote songs for his musical comedy web series Royalties and Apple TV+’s animated sitcom Central Park before the pandemic struck the United States, he then used those experiences as a precursor to his new EP. As Criss continues to promote his new music, he answered 20 of Billboard's questions – giving us a peek into how his new EP came together, and how growing up in San Fransisco shaped him as an actor, singer and all-around artist.

1. What inspired your latest project, Masquerade?

Although I would have preferred that it come at a far less grim cost, I finally had the time. Before the pandemic, I had written 10 new songs for my show Royalties -- along with an original song for Disney and another for Apple’s Central Park. These were all assignments in which I was writing for a certain scenario and character. Go figure. It was the most music I had ever written in a calendar year. This really emboldened me to rethink how I made my own music— to start putting a focus on “character creation” in my songs, rather than personal reflection. The latter was not proving to be as productive. The alchemy of having this time and having set a new intention with my own songwriting and producing made me put on a few of my favorite masques and throw myself a Masquerade.

2. How do you think your background as an actor complements your music?

They are one and the same to me. I treat acting roles like musical pieces— dialogue is like scoring a melody; there’s pace, dynamics, cadence, tone. Physical characterization is like producing -- zeroing in on the bass line, deciding on the kick pattern. Vocal characterization is like choosing the right sonic experience, choosing the most effective snare sound, and mixing the high end or low end. It goes without saying that it works in the complete opposite direction. Making each song is taking on a different role literally and employing the use of different masques to maximize the effectiveness of the particular story being told.

3. On Instagram  you wrote that “Masquerade is a small collection of the variety of musical masques that have always inspired me.” Which track do you identify with most in your real life?

Everybody absorbs songs differently. Some key into the lyrics, some into the melody, some the production, some into vocal performance. When I listen to songs, I consider all of their value on totally different scales. So it’s hard to say if there’s any track I “identify” with more than any others, since I -- by nature -- identify with all of them. I think I just identify with certain aspects more than others. If it helps for a more interesting answer, I will say I enjoy the slightly more classical, playful -- dare I say -- more Broadway-leaning wordplay of “Walk of Shame,” but that’s just talking about lyricism. I enjoy the attitude of “F*kn Around,” the batsh--t musicality of “I Can’t Dance,” the relentless grooves of “Let’s” and “For A Night Like This.” All have different ingredients I really enjoy having an excuse to dive into.

4. What’s the first piece of music that you bought for yourself, and what was the medium?

Beatles audio cassettes: “Help” and “Hard Day’s Night.” I just listened on repeat on a tape-playing Walkman until my brother and I got a stereo for our room with a CD player in it, which was  when I just bought the same two albums again, but this time as compact discs.

5. What was the first concert you saw?It’s hard to say, because my parents took us to a lot of classical concerts when we were small. But I guess this question usually refers to what was the first concert you went to on your own volition, and that my friend, was definitely Warped Tour ’01. My brother and I went on our own— two teenagers going to their first music festival, in the golden age of that particular genre and culture. It was f--king incredible.

6. What did your parents do for a living when you were a kid?

My dad was in private banking and advised really, really wealthy people on how to handle their money. My mom was, by choice, a stay-at-home mom, but in reality, she was my dad’s consigliere. They discussed absolutely everything together. They were a real team, and I saw that every single day in the house. They both had a background in finance (That’s how they met in the first place.) and were incredibly skilled at all the hardcore adulting things that I absolutely suck at. They were total finance wizards together. So of course, instead of becoming an accountant, I picked up playing the guitar and ran as far I could with it. Luckily, they were all about it.

7. What was your favorite homecooked meal growing up?

My dad was an incredible chef. For special occasions, I’d request his crab cakes. They were unreal. I’ve never had a crab cake anywhere in the world that was good as my dad’s.

8. Who made you realize you could be an artist full-time?

I don’t know if I’ve actually realized that yet.

9. What’s at the top of your professional bucket list?

The specifics change every day, but the core idea at the top is to continue being consistently inconsistent with my choices, and to keep getting audiences to constantly reconsider their consideration of me. But I mean, sure, what performer doesn’t want to play Coachella? What songwriter doesn’t want to have Adele sing one of their songs? What actor doesn’t want to be in a Wes Anderson film?

10.  How did your hometown/city shape who you are?

San Francisco. I mean, come on. I was really lucky. The older I get, the more grateful I am for just being born and raised there. It’s an incredibly diverse, culturally rich, colorful, inclusive, vibrant city. By the time I was born, it had served as a beacon for millions of creative, out-of-the-box thinkers to gather and thrive. I grew up around that. The combination of that with having parents, who were unbelievably supportive of the arts themselves, laid an incredibly fortunate foundation to consider the life of an artist as a legitimately viable option. It’s a foundation that I am supremely aware is not the case for millions of young artists around the world. I was absurdly lucky.

11.  What’s the last song you listened to?

I mean probably one of mine, but not by choice. I know, lame. But I’m promoting a new EP, what’d you expect? But if you wanna know what I’ve been listening to, as far as new s--t is concerned: a lot of Lizzy McAlpine, Remi Wolf, and Charlie Burg.

12.  If you could see any artist in concert, dead or alive, who would it be?

The Beatles is an obvious "yeah, duh." Sammy Davis, Mel Tormé, or of course, Nat King Cole. I would’ve loved to see Howard Ashman give a lecture on his creative process and his body of work.

13. What’s the wildest thing you’ve seen happen in the crowd of one of your sets?

I feel like just having a crowd at all, at any one of my sets, is pretty wild enough.

14. What’s your karaoke go-to?

The real answer to this I’ll write into a book one day, because I have a lot to say about karaoke etiquette. I have two options here: I can either name a song that I like to sing for me, for fun, or I can name a song that really gets the group going. The answer depends on what kind of karaoke night we’re dealing with here. So I will say, after I’ve selected a ton of songs that services a decent enough party vibe for everyone else, then I would do one for me, and that would be the Beatles’ “Oh! Darling.”

15. What’s one thing your most devoted fans don’t know about you?

What I have up my sleeve.

16. What TV show did you binge-watch over the past year?

Dave is a stroke of genius. There are episodes that I believe are bona fide masterpieces. Also, My Brilliant Friend is a masterclass in cinematic television.

17. What movie, or song, always makes you cry?

It’s A Wonderful Life.

18. What’s one piece of advice you would give to your younger self?

Get used to sharing everything about yourself and your life now, or more astutely, to the idea that you don’t necessarily get to control how your life is shared. I know it’s not really your thing, but you’re gonna have to get used to it, so start building up those calluses now. And don’t worry, all the stuff you love now will be cool again in your mid-thirties, so keep some of those clothes because you’ll be a full-blown fashion icon if you just keep wearing exactly what you’re wearing. Oh nd also, put money into Apple and Facebook.

19.  What new hobby did you take on in the last year?

I’ve always been a linguaphile. My idea of leisure time is getting to study or review other languages. This past year, I took the time to finally dive into learning how to read, write, and speak Japanese. Other than making music, it was one of the biggest components of my 2020-2021.

20. What do you hope to accomplish or experience by the end of 2021?

I hope I get to play live shows again.

[milk-addicc]

I really liked that post you made about how Capcom feels about Narumitsu. And I'm wondering how do you think they feel about Narumayo? Personally to me it feels like they throw more hints at Narumitsu since with the other one if Takami wanted it to be canon he would of done it at the end of T&T. I also think the team could of made it more obvious in SoJ with Maya's big return but I never really saw the hints but I know I'm biased lol.

oh i’m glad you like my rambles haha;;

ahh... that ship, 

well first, about the whole Takumi “wanting narumitsu to be canon” thing, its not exactly making them canon but have more fanservice leaning heavy towards narumitsu (which was declined by the director(?) who claimed, i sorta agree with, that the game did well even without the narumitsu hinting since in the first game they didn’t have that intention and it was pure coincidence that their relationship was just THAT deep and meaningful which is incredible lmao, Takumi and co managed to slip his warning and still put at least some of the hints in TT tho hhh-). so even then, i doubt the crew actually want the endgame to come so soon hh.

okay, back on topic. what i think about naru//mayo? yea, i’m not keen on that ship personally at all, actually i despise it. like, they first met in the office, in front of their dead loved one, Mia. Maya was 17, Phoenix was 24. you have Maya, who’s supposedly still in HIGH SCHOOL and Phoenix, who has GRADUATED COLLEGE, has a JOB, and most likely has PAID HIS OWN BILLS. from that point alone, it should already feel weird. 

Maya’s an adolescence, a teenager, she just lost her sister and barely grew up, in a way she’s still innocent, notice how she tend to ask random questions and or say things that she thinks makes sense or amusing, she tends to be naive too. its kinda like.. a child.

and Phoenix on the other hand, is a grown man. heck even Maya says he’s an “old fart”, they’re legit aware of their own age gap in game and outright say it. if anything, they both act like self-aware best friends/brother-sister than romantically. even Maya said it herself, she wants to be a good big sister for Pearl and Nick.

now how about we ignore this obvious fact just for a little while and try to see it from only their interactions in-franchise. heres the kicker, you may not see it in game since they only lightly nudges about this ship (usually with Pearl, and was dismissed by Maya right after.), but in some of AA spin off mangas (and from what i heard, one of the stage shows), for some reason, this ship has their own hints despite being completely aware that Maya is a teenager.

but its okay now don’t hold your breaths, 

their “hints” are more of a one-off ish thing, most of the time a gag and not taken seriously, and unlike other ship per say narumitsu, where it actually affects their lives and changed it forever IN-GAME. “i care about Maya and understands her” and “i became an attorney because of you, Edgeworth and i don’t have any regrets” are both literally incomparable, especially given Phoenix and Edgeworth’s history together in-game canon.

anyway, here’s some common arguments i’ve encountered about this particular ship :

“but Phoenix cares about Maya a lot! he literally went through a trial against a hitman and run through a burning bridge for her!”

“Phoenix blushed and goes red when Pearl says he’s Maya’s special someone and he stutters!”

“Well my parents had a huge age gap!"

“well, Maya is 18 in AA2″

“considering Maya is a christmas cake now, Nick better tap that” 

“she’s an adult in AA6 tho”

now lets dissect each of these,

yes, Phoenix cares about Maya a lot he literally did cross a burning bridge for her but people seem to forget that this is the same man who turned his life around, abandon his dreams, study law for four years, and became an attorney to meet one man and willing to defend a girl who looks like his psychotic ex that nearly poisoned him in court. he literally would believe in his clients’s innocence no matter what, he’s by nature would sacrifice anything and even his life for someone. so its normal that he cares about Maya, but is it romantic? i doubt it, he cares about her safety and well being but does it have to be a romantic hint? no, of course not, he’s just very selfless for the people he cares about and Maya has no one to help her but Nick when she’s in trouble, he’s one of few adults she can trust and will help her out.

oh so blushing and stuttering due to embarrassment means having feelings now? and about the stuttering, he literally stutters around Edgeworth a lot lol. i’m starting to feel like people ships naru//mayo not because of their depth but because Pearl said so. Pearl finds them should be together and keep shoving the audience with Nick being “Mystic Maya’s special someone”, well if thats the case, they also explained why this happened, in-game. Pearl grew up very sheltered and among unhealthy marriages she just assumes a girl and a boy together means they’re dating and being “special someones”. she most likely just wants her cousin to be in a happy relationship unlike her parents where her father left both her and her mother but didn’t know any better because she was eight years old.

https://youtu.be/FGAqQkMEKNs?start=674&end=776

now about the parent thing and taking it personal, well my parents too had a huge age-gap of 7 years. but how come is it okay? its because they met when my mum was already a career woman at 26. she’s already an adult when my dad met her. what does this mean? it means my parents were both adults when they’re together, this is why i still like GumMaggey despite their age gap so wide, they first met when Maggey has already had a career, supposedly in her 20′s, she’s a young adult, she can buy alcohol by herself, already knows whats right and wrong and has live life independently, not a still hormonal teenager who depends on one adult figure. did your parents date when your mum is in highschool while your dad is like in his mid 20′s? sorry to hear that.

as for the last three arguments, i don’t even want to touch any of them with a five-foot pole. are you listening to yourself? do you not feel like you’re a creep typing that?

let me give you a benefit of the doubt. yes she’s older and legally an adult, but are you really discrediting the fact they met when Maya was still in highschool? they met and became friends when she’s 17 and he’s 24. sure they barely met during disbarment era, but should that change anything? why should it? how should it? like this?

“Oh this is Maya, i haven’t met her in years but boy she sure has grown up can’t wait to date her since she’s legal now.”

because thats what that argument sounds like, YIKES. 

you know? if they met under a different circumstance and Maya was like 19, i’d let it go. but they didn’t, they met because of a horrible loss, Maya, still in training, 17 lost her big sister and Phoenix, a rookie, at 24 lost his mentor. 

in conclusion, i don’t like naru//mayo at all

pairing them feels like pairing Edgeworth with Kay or Phoenix with Ema, just because they partnered in investigations, make playful jabs at each other, and saved each others’s lives before, people just think they like each other romantically despite their age-gap in first meetings (not to mention Kay sees Edgeworth as somewhat of a father figure, and she’s nearly 18 while Edgeworth is the same age as Phoenix). especially with how Maya, being a zoomer, calls Phoenix an “old fart” and just makes jokes about how so out-of-touch Phoenix is with the modern entertainment.

from observations, i have a huge hunch that almost all of them pair these two because :

1. Maya’s a girl protagonist so its a male protagonist x female protagonist type of deal and despise narumitsu because “yaoi”

2. AA6 she’s an adult so she’s legal which is damn creepy on its own, or last

3. because of Pearl shipping them in game despite being an eight year old and was so sheltered she thought a man and a woman being next to each other means they’re special someones.

either way, i only see them as best friends, sibling-like relationship with self awareness here and there since they tease the audience a lot with their gag “hints” in spin-off mangas and game. 

not only that, it kinda showcase how all male/female bond don’t have to be romantic, they can be just friends or familial and still hang together. another plus for the franchise right after encouraging moving on from ex partners. *glancing at Phoenix//Iris*

and as to the people who pairs this for some odd reasons, sometimes i just want to ask these questions,

“how would you feel if you’re in Phoenix’s shoes? met your mentor’s little sister at age 17 while you’re 24, would you feel romantically interested in this high schooler?” because i don’t, to me anyone 3 years younger than me is like a baby, how would Phoenix feel when Maya’s 7 years younger?

“also... why even? narumitsu and other less questionable pairings are RIGHT THERE in the open!”

but oh well people can like and pair whatever hhh, 

and there you have it, my even longer rambling hahaha sorry;;

Edit : To add the final nail to the coffin, Phoenix outright has said that Maya’s like his kid, like a niece.

Edit 2 : remember that this is simply my personal take, you can somewhat use this to make yourself feel better about your pair nor simply just to hate on the ship itself but do not use this to dictate actual people what to ship and not to ship. 

please don’t be destructive towards others.

[gossip-girl-of-middleearth]

Please tell us about the cinema, I beg you

Oh boy...that accursed night. If you think fanfic plots are chaotic, just wait for this story.

Story under the cut:

So, I just got this job at my small town’s local theatre. I genuinely enjoyed it, and was quite content with the way things were going—fun shifts, cool coworkers, and a nice boss. So I thought.

I was only two weeks in when the “incident” occurred.

At the theatre, we had to collect a walkie talkie radio at the start of every shift, and sign it in and out with a piece of paper in the office.

It was a little clunky and annoying when cleaning cinemas with vacuums, but nothing to cry over.

One night, I’m put to work with a new supervisor I hadn’t met before and some new coworkers (they’d all been there a while, but this was my first shift with them).

For a little context, I’m 19, and most of the other employees were like 15-17. So, I was basically being bossed around by pretentious, power-tripping kids. Fun.

King Kong vs Godzilla had just been released, so of course, the theatre was packed that night — 130 people per room.

Now, we usually have 20-30 minute intervals between sessions to clean the cinemas, but with the release of a new movie, it was cut down in half, sometimes less.

I was cleaning the most popular cinema that night, and was first told to take my time, as it needed to be spotless. Also, side note, can people please not throw popcorn everywhere? It’s a pain to clean. Then again, I don’t work there anymore nor ever will, so do what you want, I suppose.

My little coworker told me to take my radio off my belt and put it aside to get a good vacuum going through each aisle, as it apparently made it easier, as the cord would sometimes get wrapped around the radio stem.

Fair enough.

I did so, and left it on the wooden platform of the rows to begin vacuuming. He leaves and I get to work.

However, he comes rushing back a few minutes later and says, “what the hell are you still cleaning for?? We’ve got a hundred people waiting outside???”

I’m over it™️ at this point because I only took this job to see the behind the scenes of how a cinema works. I shrug and go, “okay”

I pack the vacuum up and try to leave hastily, as he’s being very antsy and pushy.

He gets frustrated and grabs the rest of my cleaning crap to leave, and tells me to hurry up behind him.

My hands are full and I can’t grab the radio, so I say, “what about the walkie talkie?”

I swear I hear him say, “leave it, there’s no time!”

I shrug and think it’s weird, but trust him to know better.

However, once I dump my crap and prepare to leave, as a hundred people are pushing in behind me, my intuition tells me to grab the walkie talkie.

I rush back in to where I left it, and find it missing

I have a brief moment of “oh shit”

However, I think to myself, “it’s okay, you only took this job for shits and giggles. If they fire you, you have your other job anyways. What’s the worst that can happen?”

If only I knew.

An hour goes by into my shift, and I’m cleaning another cinema with the same coworker. I’ve kind of shoved the walkie talkie thing to the back of my mind, because I was doing a closing shift that night and could probably get away with not facing my manager about the sign out sheet.

However, at one point the boy goes, “where’s your radio??”

Sheepishly, I say, “uh...I left it in cinema 3, like you told me to?”

He sort of pales and I think this little skinny high schooler is about to pass out.

He starts yelling at me and tells me that I need to get my flashlight and start checking every single row in there.

I go, “fuck no, the movie is still going? You want me to flash a torch in the peoples’ faces during King Kong?? The one cinema hosting the entirety of the sweaty balls side of reddit right now???”

He gets very shitty and says, “I’ll do it myself, wait here.”

By now I know I’m in the shit, but shrug and remember I can always escape through the vents if need be.

Now, there was this really fucking annoying 15 year old boy I was working with that night, who’s the definition of the “well aCtUaLlY” guy irl

He comes sprinting into the theatre I was cleaning, and starts literally interrogating me over this walkie talkie. Like, he thinks he’s the “bad cop” or some shit. Other coworkers closer to my age had already warned me about him before I even met him.

The other boy I was working with apparently couldn’t find it, and just didn’t want to deal with the consequences that night so much, that he called his mum to come pick him up early.

Weakling child.

It was at this point that I quietly arrived at the conclusion of “they think I stole it”

I didn’t understand why, it’s a fucking walkie talkie? What’s the big deal? Go get a Dora the Explorer one to replace it from Target??

I let my inner Mickey Milkovich come out, and play cool.

Him: you fucking stole it

Me:

This 15 year old Ben Shapiro-looking fucker starts grilling me, and literally places me under theatre arrest. I wasn’t allowed to leave the room I was cleaning, in other words.

He gets uncomfortably close—just me and this weird boy in this dark theatre—and goes, “I want you to be brutally honest with me...did you take the walkie talkie? I won’t tell the manager that you did.”

If you guys know me well enough from my blog, then you know this boy suffered a great deal of aggressive sarcasm in response.

He gets pissed (brown-noser), and tells me to continue cleaning, as he leaves the theatre.

Only ten minutes go by until he comes back, but this time with “good cop”.

I roll my eyes, and turn the vacuum off.

They stand at the bottom of the cinema blocking my entrance with their arms folded, and start interrogating me about stealing it.

I give them some more Mickey Milkovich sarcasm, as I had already explained to them a hundred times what happened.

They involve the manager (snitches) and now I’m really in trouble.

They force me to go into the cinema whilst the movie is still playing to look for it. Begrudgingly grabbing my flashlight, and preparing for rightfully angry people as I search their crotches in the middle of a highly anticipated movie, I head inside theatre 3.

Fuck doing that though, I watch the movie instead with the people and eat some popcorn.

Figuring a reasonable amount of time to search had gone by, I sadly leave the cool laser battle scene, and head back out.

Me: “I searched and couldn’t find it.”

Power-complex 15 year old with a punchable Ben Shapiro face: “Did you look everywhere in the cinema??”

Me: “Yeah, I shoved a flashlight up seat 33’s asshole and checked it myself.”

Some more pissy exchanges take place, and I’m told to go clean another cinema.

I’m having fun at this point, because I’ve worked enough jobs to know this situation was being dealt with incredibly immaturely by the other staff.

Regarding accidents like these in the workplace, and given how big the cinema chain is, they should know insurance covers a simple walkie talkie, and that assuming the new employee stole something which is misplaced is a bad way to integrate them into your company. It’s simply a bad look for your business.

I’m cleaning another cinema when all three come in, and tell me they’re going to put cinema 3 on lockdown when the movie ends, and check everyone’s bags.

I’m amused at this point, so I really just go “damn bro that’s wild”

They do exactly that, and it’s as awkward as you can imagine.

People are angry and annoyed—all 130 of them at 9:30pm huddled in a group, having their bags searched for a damn walkie talkie.

After discovering no one had actually stolen it, like I said, they start interrogating me again.

“Are you sure it was cinema 3??? Is your memory perhaps failing you???”

“If I say yes, will I go home sooner?” (my shift ended 15 minutes ago, and I wasn’t allowed to leave)

Naturally, I stayed another 40 minutes, and had to search the entire building. I’m talking arcade, toilets, offices—everywhere.

It is eventually deemed completely lost, and I basically end the night saying, “well, I ain’t about to strip nude for you all for a full body search, and although I’ve never had such a fun shift anywhere else, I’m not a fan of work environments that promote skepticism and cohort-wide distrust. I ain’t coming in next week, or the week after that, or the...well, I think you get the point.”

I leave my badge behind, and basically book it out of the cinema an hour after my shift was supposed to end. I worked illegally longer than I was supposed to, and wasn’t given the legal shift break.

I received text messages and emails from the head office shortly after, asking if I was coming back, and ignored them for a little while, as although I can handle irl confrontation, virtual ones spook me?

Anywho, the walkie talkie actually costs $1000, but as mentioned before, I, an adult, recognise insurance covers these sorts of things, especially in companies as big as these.

So, moral of the story, don’t leave 15 year olds in charge of adults, because most of the time, they’re too young to realise what insurance policies are :)

[animaniachan]

A3! Act 3 Episode 9 Summary

Please read through this note before you start reading the summary!

whhhhew, finally finished episode 9 and THE EMOTIONS ARE ROLLING-😭😭

but ofc being the maniac that i am ive decided to provide a full summary of episode 9 for those who are interested!

Be warned that this is MAJOR STORY SPOILERS so i would recommend you be at least finished act 2 and all the events leading up to it before you read this. Otherwise you’ll probably have a hard time understanding the full context of things.

The last note I want to make is that this won’t be a detail-for-detail summary! I still want to keep things decently vague so people can still have the joy of experiencing the story for themselves while still providing adequate information to clear up any confusions and speculations. This summary will basically be a rough outline of the story that highlights some of the major events that went on. This summary will follow the order of how the episode played out, all the events will be listed in order.

Ofc, if anybody has any specific questions regarding the story that they want clarified or just simply want to discuss episode 9: always feel free to shoot in an ask or dm me! I’m always happy to provide with information and/or rant about these precious boys!

Well, without further ado, here y’all go~~

WARNING: EXTREMELY LONG POST AND MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD~

the new groups of people now are the following:

High schoolers- Yuki/Muku/Azami/Kumon

Yosei University- Juza/Tsuzuru/Tenma/Taichi

Amabi- Kazunari/Banri

Adult group is still adult group~~

Apparently Tenma’s parents decided it would be a good idea to let him attend university so it was decided on the spot that he would be going through exams. He had to get Chikage to tutor to barely scrape by passing bc of how busy he was. Taichi on the other hand....Tsumugi the GOAT-

Omi now works as a professional photographer through a job his friend introduced him to.

Masumi decided to go to Fuyou University which is Tasuku and Tsumugi’s old university to study. Misumi’s brother, Madoka, also studies there. Although Madoka does not look like it, he’s actually 19... I know...

Azami decided to attend the same high school as Kumon which warms my heart honestly bc it just showed how good of friends they’ve become <3~~ Here’s his new uniform look <333

not sure how i feel about the red hoodie but eh, boy can pull it off so it doesn’t matter aha~

Guy is apparently opening up a new Zahra style bar with the help of the winter troupe members such as Homare who introduced him to an interior design company (same company that installed that brick wall in his room orz). Hisoka will also be helping out in Guy’s bar.

The entirety of Reni’s backstory (5 episodes in total) which describe his initial meeting with Yukio during high school to how they built Mankai together was described through the format of portraits (the autumn troupe signature). HIs backstories are basically just narrations of Act 3 1/2 if any of you read that when it was first posted.

Reni’s real name is apparently “Kamikizaka Reiji” and “Reni” is a nickname that Yukio gave him in high school bc Yukio thought that his real name was too hard to write out in kanji and pronounce lolol.

Reni keeps a journal which documents his time with Yukio (basically Act 3 1/2) in a safe in his office.

Kasumi’s nickname back in the day was apparently “Juriko”: stems from “Juliette” and “ko” which is a way to feminize someone’s name in Japanese. This was because he was the crossdresser that had to play Juliette in the OG spring troupe RomiJuri- heh.

 Shifuto is now the new “top” in GOD Troupe after Tasuku and Haruto who got demoted.

FRIEND ANGST BETWEEN AZAMI AND SHIFUTO HNGHHH and that’s all I’m willing to say oop-

GOD Troupe challenged Mankai to an act-off once again and this time appointed Tsumugi as the lead and Tasuku to be in the play and the theme as “devil” and thus...Devil Tsumugi was born.

The company was initially debating on whether to accept the challenge or not but Tsumugi and Taichi desperately wanted to show Reni who they have become as an actor and prove him wrong on all the things he’s said to them. Basically, everyone who was casted for this play had their own reasons on why they wanted to act.

Misumi’s dad’s name is revealed to be “Kusumi” which literally means nine-points/sides and I- top 10 betrayals? I was certain that his name will have something to do with a square but apparently not-

Although it was briefly revealed during Sky Pirates, Misumi’s dad is the official script writer for GOD Troupe. However, it is shown here that he has absolutely no talent in writing so what he does is get Madoka to act as his ghostwriter and write for him.

Hence this birthed Madoka’s complex of wanting to write in his own free will and not under the control of his father. Since everything he writes gets “edited” by his father but everything his father edited gets rejected by Reni and so Madoka has to fix it himself anyways.

Returning to backstory, Reni revealed that Yukio legit went to visit Misumi’s grandpa (Hakkaku) as a senior high school student to ask him for a script. As a note, Hakkaku was already a very famous script writer at that time and age wise he is about what both their dads would be. Ofc he was refused many times but Yukio wouldn’t give up and would not stop pestering Hakkaku until he finally caved in.

Honestly I loved the autumn and winter troupe dynamic throughout this entire episode- just the way they supported Taichi and Tsumugi is just-

Kumon had to act as the mediator between Azami and Shifuto to try and recover their friendship and the entire process was hilarious.

Yukio and Reni were actually Yuzo and Kasumi’s high school seniors at Nanakusa High. Yuzo was the “ghost member” that was only member of drama club in-name only that was mentioned earlier.

NAMIKAWA DAISUKE’S VOICE IN KASUMI- *deaded counter x1* as a tiny side note: i realized half way through that Tezuka (Reni), Sanada (Yuzo), and Ootori (Kasumi) were in the same high school together bc of their seiyuus. This is for my TeniPuri fans out there haha~~

During their last performance in high school, Yukio and Reni got boycotted by the other junior members right before their play. Reni ended up forcing a reluctant Yukio to go at speak act out the monologue Hakkaku provided for them and everybody ended up being overwhelmed by Yukio’s performance.

This is what ended up making Reni dedicate his post high school life creating Mankai with Yukio, he wants to see Yukio act on stage again. He describes Yukio’s acting as “someone who was chosen by God” and even went as far as using his own money his parents gave him when they kicked him out (strict family bs) to build the initial theatre while they both worked part-time. Reni was the one who designed the entire theatre according to Yukio’s wishes to “make it long lasting”. However, Yukio revealed to him that he has no desire to stand on stage again and instead wants to make others “full bloom”, this invoked a sense of betrayal in Reni.

Reni was also the one who recruited Syu, his childhood friend, into the theatre. From there on, Yuzo and Kasumi also joined. Kasumi was revealed to also be garbage at acting at first but Yukio appointed him as lead for their first play nonetheless.

There is apparently some outside force wanting to ruin Mankai as they even went as far as stealing a part of Tsuzuru’s script and provided it to Misumi’s dad who ended up plagiarizing. It is later revealed that Reni had nothing to do with this so it is currently unknown who the main perpetrator is.

 In order to get a better grasp on his devil character, Tsumugi opted to spend one day with each of the other winter troupe members (Homare, Hisoka, and Azuma) individually. This is to get more insight from people who had lived such different lives and accumulated such different experiences. Honestly, one of the most heartwarming moments ever.

MY ANGST MAN IS HERE WITH HIS FIRST APPEARANCE!!! SAKURAI TAKAHIRO’S VOICE OMGGGGG *deaded counter x2*

He met Tsumugi in front of the GOD Theatre and asked him to “save” Reni.

On the day of the performance, Tsumugi and Taichi decided to walk to the theatre. They met Banri and Juza along the way who were planning to do a street act to release some energy. On their way, they ended up being surrounded by numerous punks who were presumably sent by the same outside force who stole Tsuzuru’s script.

The night before the actual performance, the plagiarism was revealed to both sides and both sides were just as much caught off guard by this. Reni, however, refused to change the direction of the play since it was too risky as the performance is the next day. However, Shifuto refused to act out something that is plagiarized since he promised Azami that they would have a “fair fight like men”.

And so, he managed to convince Haruto to use Madoka’s script that he has written for the first time according to free will and changed the entire play in one night. With the help of Haruto’s authority, they managed to do it in time. (I’ve failed to mention this until now but these three has been building up chemistry all through out this episode and im so down for them tbh)

Banri told Juza to take Tsumugi and Taichi and go ahead while he stays behind to try and buy some time alone against all the men. Just when Banri was in a tight spot due to power in number...

BAM THIS OLD MAN COMES IN AND SAVES THE DAY!! by now y’all already know... YASUMOTO HIROKI’S VOICE HAAAAAAAAAH *deaded counter x3*

After Banri revealed to Zen that he was autumn troupe leader of Mankai, Zen gave him a card of his restaurant, “Gentiana” and promised to treat them to a meal there afterwards.

Costume reveal for GOD Troupe. Honestly, I love the chemistry that was built throughout this episode between Shifuto, Haruto, and Madoka. Haruto really did give out redeeming qualities and i don’t dislike him as much as before aha (even tho he is still a snob) and I acknowledge him as a character. Madoka’s script consisted of two characters and basically talks about two estranged brothers (his way of writing down his guilt for towards Misumi)

Costume reveal for Mankai as many of you probably have seen already- devil tsumugi and sexy tasuku is just-

 In terms of actual in-game plays, this was the second play that I’ve actually cried at, the first being Clockwork. Super emotional and well-written play and certainly it draws a lot of parallels to Sympathy for the Angel.

SAME RENI...JUST-SAME. TT

After the performances...i won’t reveal who won and by how much but Reni did officially apologize for all his past actions as he was reminded of his passion for acting through this play. Izumi thought this too but it is hard to 100% forgive him bc of the pain he’s brought on all the members.

He revealed why he quit Mankai, it was bc he and Yukio had become so divided that if he had stayed, the entire balance of Mankai would fall to ruins. He actually came to the conclusion to leave after being trapped in the time loop with Yukio for about three days aha~

Reni decided to create GOD Troupe bc he wanted them to win the Fleur Awards first and crush Mankai, that way, he may have the chance one day to accepted a lost Yukio in his troupe as an actor and not a director (obsessed much my dude??)

The last part of the episode is Reni wanting to talk to Izumi about the Ikaruga family and being invited to Mankai Dorms as a result. There he reminisced the days with the OGs before we are left with a cliffhanger-

Even though he only talked for two lines but ONO DAISUUUUKE~~~ *deaded counter x4*

The very last scenes showcased how the OGs are starting to come back together as they will be getting involved with the new Mankai members.

THIS OLD MAN LEGIT WENT AND HELPED THEM PICK CABBAGE I-

LOOK AT THIS EXPRESSION HE IS SO PRECIOUS-

~❀❀❀~

that concludes the rough summary of episode 9! i...this was an ordeal to get through aha and sorry for it ended up being such a long post...It was inevitable bc this episode consisted of 39 chapters. 

Honestly im so dead by the end of this that i didnt have the heart to check for any grammar mistakes so there’re probably quite a few that i ask you kindly to just ignore~ 🥺🥺

now, time to dig a hole and cry until episode 10 comes out...☠️😇😭

[buttered-ghost-toast]

Listen, if you don't fill out all of those numbers and tell me everything about your MC I'm going to feel robbed

Oh geez, fam! ...aight. That took me a minute. But below you will find out more about my girl, Niri! 

1.      What is their favourite food?—

Cheeseburgers and carrots. 

2.       Do they have a fear of an animal? If so, what animal? –

Not a fan of snakes, lizards, frogs, sharks.

3.       What do they wear to bed? –

Shorts and a t-shirt. Sometimes nothing at all!! That had to stop when she moved into the HoL though. Brothers poppin’ in at all hours gettin’ an eyeful. Lucifer was upset. 

4.       Do they like cuddling?—

1000000000%. Niri’s a big ol’ cuddle bug. Asmo’s all about it. So is Beel. 

5.       Do they have a secret handshake with anyone? -- With Astaroth. It’s quite elaborate and they only ever do it when they decide to get up to trouble.

 6.       What do they look like? – 

She cute if I may say so myselffff (don’t judge me, she’s a self insert hah!) Mid to slightly above average height for a human female, fairly toned. Brown eyes, mid-back length hair that’s brown at the root, fades to a teal and purple under layers. Sometimes her hair will fade to a light yellowy-green. She has the hookup for dye from Barbatos who likes to procure things for her from the human realm. She also has quite a few tattoos.

 7.       Do they like chocolate? –

Only dark. She’s allergic to additives in certain milk chocolates so she doesn’t eat it much. 

 8.      What are their good and bad traits?

Good: Helpful, kind, encouraging, quite a hard worker in any task given her.

Bad: Easily swept up into trouble by others, will prioritize naps over other stuff sometimes, awfully flirtatious which gets her in hot water with Lucifer because apparently lesser demons keep poppin’ by the house with gifts also HUMAN, DID YOU REALLY JUST SAY THAT TO LORD DIAVOLO?! Oopsssssss~ Also, you know how Luci’s always doing the “MAAAAMMMOOOONNNNN…”…yeah, that’s almost always followed by “NIIIIIRIIIIIIIIII….”

 9.      Do they have any artistic talent?

Yes. She’s a musician so there’s that…and she likes to paint.

10.  What is their favourite room to be in, in the house they live in?

She likes the music room since the boys tend to spend quite a bit of time in there together, but she’s usually found in the kitchen making loads of food and baked goods…also, that’s where you’re more likely to find Beel, and she reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally likes Beel.

11.  Do they believe in luck?

To an extent. She believes that luck exists, but she thinks relying on it is a bit naïve.

12.  Can they do magic?

Like pull a rabbit out of a hat type thing? Yes. She picked up a few little tricks here and there from a friend who loves show magic. Def not the real stuff though.

13.  Do they believe in dragons?

She didn’t until she went to the Devildom. Not that they just have dragons hangin’ out all willy-nilly, but she’s heard stories from the brothers and others about dragons.

 14.  What is a pet peeve of theirs?

Rudeness and liars who don’t give up even after they’ve been caught in the lie. Also people who demand things of others as if they’re property and not living beings with feelings …this isn’t about Belphegor at all. Nope. She doesn’t have issues with him still.

15.  What was the last thing they cried about?

She was able to talk to all her bandmates at once for her weekly call home. They all just really miss each other, ok? It sucks that she has to lie to them about where she is because she knows they’re worried about her, but it was just nice to hear their voices.

16.  What is their sexuality?

Pan.

17.  Do they have a best friend? If so, who, and what makes them their best friend?

We’ll narrow this down to the Devildom. Niri gets along with everyone and literally loves all the beings she’s met and knows she could count on them for most anything, but there’s definitely a more solid feeling to her connection with Beelzebub. They sort of just get to be vulnerable and entirely open with one another and there is never judgement or ill will, even when Beel eats her secret snack stash…again.

 She’s kind of getting to that point with Astaroth as well, but she can sense he’s still a little guarded in certain aspects, and she’s not going to push.

18.  Have they ever been in a romantic relationship?

Yes, quite a few. It’s not her favorite thing to talk about since she’s been quite unlucky in that aspect, but hey, the past is the past.

19.  What does their relationship with their family look like? Are they close? Distant? Ect.

Her actual family family (with the exception of her brother) are not close in the least. They’re sort of barely on speaking terms. Her chosen family (comprised of her band and some of the closest staff) is extremely close.

20.  Do they have a pet?

No. She loves animals and had a dog up until recently, but they passed. It’s okay though, they had a good long life and it wasn’t painful for them when it happened.

21.  Do they have a familiar?

Nope. Non-magical.

22.  Are they a supernatural being?

Nope! “Boring” human, but she does seem to always find herself in weird situations that are sorta paranormal.

23.  How do they usually wear their hair?

It really just depends on the day. If she had time to work on it, it’s down and straight. If it’s a rush in the morning (read: fight for the bathroom because Beel won’t MOVE) she’ll toss it in a bun or ponytail depending on how hot it is outside. There are the odd days when she’ll just let it vibe in its natural wavy/curly state, but she kind of got fed up with the brothers calling her a sheep because it’s so fluffy.

24.  Can they play an instrument? If so, what instrument and what can they play?

Yes! She learned guitar and bass at a young age and was tinkering with drums before she was whisked away to the Devildom.

25.  What type a high schooler are/were they?

She was the quiet weird kid that didn’t quite fit in with the weird weird crowd, but also wasn’t popular. Plenty of people knew her or of her, but she mainly stuck with her group of friends and was nice to everyone.

26.  Have they ever been in a physical fight before? If so, with who? Who won?

Yes. Just small bits of violence. No one of import, tbh. But there was that one time they all went out to party at the fall and Mammon and Levi started teasing her and in her drunken state, Niri went to punch Mammon who managed to duck so she hit Levi square in the nose. He was fiiiiiiine.

27.  What is their favourite holiday?

Halloween because it’s fun, Christmas because of the togetherness, and EASTER BECAUSE MARSHMALLOW PEEPS!

 28.  If they could have one wish, what would they wish for?

A pass to go from the Devildom to the Human realm and back whenever she wants forever.

 29.  Do they wants kids? If they already have kids, do they want more?

No. Never.

 30.  Do they have a job?

Yes? Being a singer in a band is a job, right? It doesn’t always feel like a job because it’s awesome, but it’s a job.

 31.  Do they know how to drive?

Yes. She has convinced Mammon to let her drive his car on a few occasions and every time they get back he swears NEVER AGAIN. She a little speed demon.

 32.  Do they get stressed out easily?

Funny story, actually…YES. But she is pretty good at not letting it show. So on the outside she’s like la-la-la~ but inside it’s all AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~~~

 33.  Did they ever dye their hair before? If so, to what colour? Did they like it?

Absolutely lol. Niri has gone through a few colors in her life, but her favorite is and always will be the teal. (Fun fact: the purple came from a happy accident a few years back when she dyed over a pink shade and a layer turned out purple. She liked it so now she does it that way on purpose.)

 34.  Have they ever broken the law?

Never anything egregious, but she’s gotten tickets for stuff in the human world. Disturbing the peace, speeding, she was fined once (along with her bandmates) for a surprise free show they did in front of a train station which got a lot more attention than they were expecting and wound up shutting down a couple city blocks. Oooooooooopsss~

 35.  Do they own a plant?

She’s really bad with plants. REALLY bad. She was gifted a plant by Simeon a couple weeks into the exchange program and it took an embarrassingly long time for her to notice it was a fake plant…since he knows she sucks at keeping things alive.

 36.  Have they ever rode a horse before?

Once, and it was a terrifying experience so she just keeps her distance now.

 37.  What is their favorite gif?

anything featuring Titus Andromedon.

 38.  Do they get along with others easily?

 She tries to. It’s not always possible, but she tries, dammit!

 39.  Do they have any tattoos?

Several, yes. One arm sleeve done, starting the other arm, both thighs have massive pieces on them and both ribs done as well. There are also a few small things on her fingers and back.

 40.  If I wanted to draw them, what would be distinct physical features that I would have to know to draw them correctly?

Lotta hair. Looooooottttta hair. And heavily winged eyeliner. Big lashes.

 41.  What is their favourite breed of dog?

Huskies. They’re just so cute and sassy! And perfectly sized!! Great cuddle buddies and fun to run with!

 42.  Do they live with anyone? If so, who?

Not in the human world, but she’s got 7 kinda irritating roomies in the Devildom!

 43.  Where is their dream vacation?

She’s traveled extensively, so there isn’t anywhere she dreams of going that she hasn’t already seen. Her favorite place is anywhere mountainous and lush.

 44.  Do they know more than one language?

Yep. Niri’s a language nerd. Because she likes to speak to fans and stuff, she has set it on herself to learn as many languages as she can. She’s not perfectly fluent in all of them, but it’s a good handful that she can hold a full conversation in. She and Satan like to practice with one another around the house, despite complaints from the others.

 45.  Are they a quick learner?

Depends. Most things, yes…..math and processes requiring math, NO.

 46.  Have they ever won a contest before? If so, what for? What did they win?

No, she’s not really the luck having type.

 47.  If the world were to end in 24 hours, where would they be and who would they be with?

Probably hugging Beel. They hug often. They’re kinda always together. It’s gross according to Leviathan and Belphegor.

 48.  What does their room look like?

She didn’t change much in the room she was given at the HoL. Just added her fake plant from Simeon and a few human things…she actually got the “Hang in There” kitty poster just for kicks. Lucifer hates it.

 49.  If they could have an extinct animal for a pet, what would they have?

A dodo bird. Because they’re weird and cool.

 50.  If they got called out by someone, what would they do?

Laugh and argue probably. Depends what they’re calling her out on.

51.  Have they ever shot a gun before?

Yep. Actually enjoys shooting, it’s a fun stress reliever. She makes a point to drop by shooting ranges every once in a while back home.

 52.  Have they ever been axe throwing?

Once at a renaissance festival on an odd week of downtime. She didn’t do so well. The throwing was fine, but she never hit the target. Just be glad she didn’t hit a person either!

 53.  What is something that they want but can’t have?

At the moment, all the people she loves in one place.

 54.  Do they know how to fish?

Nope! She’s a mess with that kind of thing. Also, she doesn’t like the idea of fishing for anything herself. It makes her cry to think of the fish on the hook :<.

 55.  What is something they always wanted to do but too scared?

Hmm…Niri tries to live her life in a way that she won’t have regrets, so even if something is scary, she’ll pluck up the courage to do it. But…she still hasn’t jumped out of a plane.

 56.  Do they own their own baby pictures?

Absolutely not. She cringes thinking of the outfits her parents used to put her in, so she did her best to keep those kinds of things buried and acts like they never existed. Nope. Was never a baby. Nope.

 57.  What makes them standout among others?

Niri is a pro at pretending she’s confident, so she tends to draw attention when she walks in a room like she owns the place. Also her hair is kinda bright.

 58.  Do they like to show off?

Not really. She’s flamboyant in a sense, but she doesn’t go out of her way to call attention or to be center stage…heh.

 59.  What is their favourite song?

She can never pick, honestly. There are so many songs that are so amazing!

 60.  What would be their dream vehicle?

That’s a very good question. Probably something sitting in her garage back home. Probably being driven by one of her bandmates. Because hey, what are friends for?

 61.  What is their favourite book?

Not that she isn’t a big reader, but she doesn’t really get the time to enjoy books. There’s always something that needs attention or someplace to be and she’s required to engage, so focusing on a book or story is hard, but she’s a fan of classic novels, poetry, and Greek tragedies are always good!

 62.  Who, in their opinion, makes the best food?

She likes everything Barbatos makes and thinks Luke’s desserts are fantastic, but there’s something about a human recipe that just warms her heart, so…..herself. Lol.

 63.  Are they approachable?

Absolutely! If you can get past her intimidating resting face.

 64.  Did they ever change their appearance?

Not drastically, but she has gone through a few different phases until settling on a good one.

65.  What makes them smile?

The silliness of those around her. Thinking of good memories with family/friends. Puppies.

 66.  Do they like glowsticks?

Yes. She has a stockpile of glowsticks that the brothers keep adding to.

 67.  What is something that is simple, but always makes them smile?

Watching the brothers bicker, even if it’s getting out of hand. It reminds her of her friends and how they always pick on one another.

 68.  Are they a day or night person?

Night, usually. Not that she dislikes the daytime, but day usually has so much stuff to be done whereas night is the fun stuff that doesn’t need a schedule.

 69.  Are they allergic to anything?

Some milk chocolate, bell peppers, and certain devildom plants.

 70.  What do you, the creator of this OC, like most about them?

She’s a spunky little thing who loves to have fun and make others smile above all else.

 71.  Who is their ride or die?

In the Devildom, Beelzebub and Astaroth.

Beel for most things, and Asta for the stuff Beel won’t do.

 72.  Do they currently have a significant other? If not, are they going to get one later one?

Erm…eh…look, it’s never been officially labeled or anything, ok? Like yeah they’re kind always together and have pet names for each other and like always touch and cuddle and like snuggle up in bed together and stuffffffffffff but like, idk? Is Beel her dude? Like….do we wanna even get into that?????? I mean, maybe someday? Like…what? What was the question??

 73.  What attracts them to another person?

A genuine heart, a killer smile, and a rockin’ bod. Yeah okay look everyone can be a little shallow sometimes okay get off her case >__<.  

 74.  Who is one person that can always make them laugh?

She’s a damn fool and will laugh at ANYTHING, so it’s not hard. Everyone makes her laugh. The girl will 9 times out of 10 laugh at herself for the dumbest moments.

 75.  Have they ever partied too hard and their friends had to take them home?

Oh yes many times. Many many times.  One of the first few times she hung out (went on a date) one-on-one with Beel they had a drinking contest and as it turns out, he can really hold his devil liquor.

 76.  Who would be their cuddle buddy?

She’ll cuddle up to Beel 99.9% of the time because he’s big and warm and always happy to hold, but she also really enjoys cuddling with Asmodeus. He’s such a sweetie and he smells so nice and they just snuggle and talk and laugh and it’s a nice escape. (Loads of times there are Asmo x Niri x Asta sandwiches in Asmo’s room.)

 77.  Who would cheer them up after a long day?

She tends to go to one of the brothers depending on what kind of day it’s been. Most of the time it’s gonna be Beel because again, big/warm/happy to hold her, but there are occasions where she’ll drag Beel to one of the others’ rooms and they’ll just hang out.

 78.  If they had a nightmare, who would they run to?

I mean…Beel. Lol. He’s right there.

 79.  What object to the care for the most?

She has a picture of her friends from back home that sits on her desk. She treasures that above all while she’s down in the Devildom.

 80.  Do they like other people’s children?

Sure. Kids are fine as long as they go back to their parents after a bit.

 81.  How would they react if someone broke into their home?

Seeing as there’s always someone coming into her room regardless if she’s there or not, she probably would just shrug it off. If someone decided to have a bad lapse in judgement and break into the HoL? She wouldn’t have to lift a finger.

 82.  Does anyone make them have butterflies in their stomach?

I mean….Beel. Lol. He so big and cute! Also Diavolo because he also big and cute.

 83.  What is something that they are good at?

Crying to get out of trouble. She’s a little shit. Lol.

 84.  What is their neutral expression?

Niri kinda always looks pissed off or uninterested?  Until she smiles and you realize oh, she’s just a big ol’ faker.

 85.  Do they like to cook?

Yes. It’s one of her very favorite things to do!

 86.  What is something they can’t leave home without?

Her phone! (and Beel) but like, there’s just so much a phone can do!

 87.  Who is someone that they rely on?

Have I mentioned ever that Simeon is (or was at one time) Niri’s guardian angel? He seems to always be there and ready to help in any way, so she’s pretty reliant on him and hopes he feels the same toward her. (He does. Cue uwu’s)

 88.  Do they liked to be tickled?

Absolutely not. She’s extremely ticklish and hates being tickled. She flails and cries.

 89.  Have they ever been a sword fight before?

No. No she has not lol. Unless empty wrapping paper tubes count? She’s done that.  

 90.  What is a joke that they would find funny?

All the bad ones. All of them. Ugly laugh here we go!

 91.  Do they have a place that can go and turn off their brain?

The gardens at RAD. It’s peaceful and there’s a great  view of the sky.

 92.  What was their childhood like?

Not bad, but not memorable. There was a lot of pressure put on her to be a perfect kid, and she didn’t get to have a whole ton of fun.

 93.  What are they like as an adult?

Responsible, but definitely fun-loving. Like I mentioned before, she likes to live in a way that she won’t ever regret not having done something she wanted to do, or regret any actions she took, so she’s always got an open mind and welcomes new experiences. She’s a big ol’ kid.

 94.  Do they take criticism well?

Yes. She welcomes criticism in any form as she is always looking to be the best person she can be.

 95.  Have they ever jumped out of a plane?

No. Not yet!

 96.  Who do they like to make jokes with?

Literally anyone. A total joker. Big big clown.

 97.  Have you ever drawn them before? If you are comfortable with it, would you post a picture?

Yes! I draw Niri every once in a while. I actually need to draw her again soon! I miss that girl.

[dolansmith]

Thoughts on the “Trisha Drama”

I’m going to preface this with my previous thoughts of both sides. I didn’t know who Trisha was until after I found out about the vlog squad about a year ago. I didn’t mind her, i thought she brought out an interesting perspective to the group. Then I thought she was literally off her rocker. 

I loved the vlog squad bc I found them in a really difficult time in my life and they kept me from getting too deep into a depression. While I saw some of their mistakes, I saw the best in them all and hoped for change or at least some kind of accountability. 

This is gonna be really long and idk if anyone is even gonna read this/care lol but Im just so frustrated with a lot of the people that are into the vs. Like after really looking into everything that happened, I felt kind of ashamed to be backing the vs bc they’re doing some fucked up stuff tbh. 

So lets do a basic rundown of mistakes made. 

Mistakes in their public relationship:    -Trisha: made sexual jokes about jason’s friends, started arguments about her insecurities instead of starting a conversation.     -Jason: made sexual jokes about girl’s a decade younger than trisha (and 2 and a half decades younger than him), would complain about having to go do things trisha liked doing and would pout the whole time  (i.e. disneyland and a couple of the hamilton viewings), would egg on trishas insecurities, literally dumped her on a daily basis and call her crazy when she voiced said insecurities and then would basically get back together within an hour and practically give everyone whiplash, also talked about her weight and eating habits CONSTANTLY (fucking dick)    -David: inputted himself in their relationship, recorded their fights and encouraged their toxic behavior to both his friends and his audience

Mistakes in the “official” breakup:    -Trisha: talking about jason’s ex and kids, comparing david to ted bundy (a lil wild but tbh not that big of a deal bc no one actually believed thats what she meant but anyway), the brandon thing (we’ll come back to this)    -Jason: continuing to make jokes about fucking a 19/20 year old despite his gf saying she didn’t like it, not putting an end to David “pressuring him” to making said jokes, the brandon thing    -David: ignoring his “friend” when she said not to put something in his vlog, putting his image and career first

Mistakes after:    -Trisha: constantly going on rants about david and Jason.    -Jason: staying in contact with trisha secretly. (ill get back to this too)    -David: putting his image above all else. 

Now we’re going to get into some uncomfortable hot takes. I’m gonna get a whole lotta hate from stans but tbh idc anymore

The Brandon Thing (I’ve done some digging since her video exploding at Jeff): 

   -Brandon began a relationship with a high schooler. She was underage the first time they had sex. There’s receipts and timelines set up. I’d recommend Petty Paige’s Youtube video on it for specifics.     -Lot’s of vs fans say she only brought it up when her and Jason ended so that meant she didn’t really care, but I’d like to point out that she has stated (on more than one occasion) that she voiced her thoughts on this multiple times to the group in Private and no one cared. Y’all are always going on about how she should say whatever she has to say in private but when she does and is ignored, what then? Just a thought.     -Let’s also bring the rest of the vs up in this. How come none of them ever said anything? They’re the ones still out here tolerating him. Pretty hypocritical. I’m not gonna aim anything at the girls bc none of them have Brandon in their videos but the guys? Jeff, Jason, David, Todd and I think Scott too, have all had Brandon in at least one video. They’re out here talking shit about Trisha amongst each other but are friends with a predator? Lmao Okay, cool. 

Jason Keeping in Contact for months: 

   -This was dumb.     -As someone who has suffered from mental health issues and has been in a mental hospital and suffered from attachment AND abandonment issues, Trisha would’ve been better off had Jason ended things and kept them that way. Instead, he ended their public relationship and friendship. He kept her a secret from even his “friends” and then dragged on their “friendship” for months. For what? He should’ve just given her her things and closure and kept it pushing.     -On that, why did he keep her belongings for so long and refuse to give it back until she said something public about it? He ignored her calls and texts about her very expensive things for weeks. Then she made a video calling him out on it, and she got her stuff back.    -I’m seeing a pattern here, aren’t you?

The Jeff Thing (did some digging on him too...by digging i mean google):

   -This one makes my blood boil for several reasons. ESPECIALLY AFTER TODAYS VIDEO. It rlly put everything into perspective omg.     -The starbucks story that Trisha told was the same everywhere: ‘I saw Jeff at Starbucks and said hey. He ignored me and was such a pussy he left his order at the counter after having paid.’ His masculinity is SO FRAGILE that he twisted it into ‘I’m not gonna be fake with someone who fucked over my friend. Can’t fuck them up either tho lol’ and ‘i’m not gonna make shit easy on you, i’m gonna make them feel weird’. What a baby lmfao    -His assault joke rubbed me the wrong way. I know Jeff’s schtick is the whole “I was in jail for a few months and I was a drug dealer I’m big and scary” blah blah blah. Listen, I’ve met men that have been in jail longer (he was in for only 4 months he once said I think) and had worse upbringings than he did and HAD to do some of the shit Jeff was doing (which lemme remind yall, was on his own accord). The men that I know that have lived similar and worse lifestyles than Jeff, would never and I REPEAT NEVER, make a joke about assaulting a Woman over “fucking my friend over”, when the situation was what it was. Which was: an exposé, basically. That’s some petty shit, it’s for the birds. (Also, Todd and Jay’s jokes about the assault joke? Ain’t it. They were just as bad as Jeff’s original joke.)    -Do y’all know what Jeff’s been to jail for? He tried to assault someone that worked at a 7-Eleven after he and his dumbass friends were fucking around in the store and got yelled at and ended up assaulting a woman walking by.     -He also talked about her mental health issues. Maybe he wasn’t talking about her specifically, but it was REAL specific. He said that it was crazy that a “psychopath” that’s been in a mental hospital still had a platform on youtube. That they shouldn’t have one. Trisha made a really good point of, “some could say the same about your time in jail.” Because they could. And mental health can be managed. So can your outrageous anger issues, Jeff. This was really ignorant on his part.     -I also want to remind everyone about the time he said he didn’t understand how men could be sexually harassed. That all you had to do was say no.    -He says he likes to “make things awkward” and make everything a joke when really he’s just being ignorant and doesn’t want to get real hate when he gets inevitably called out

Trisha’s “Dirt”:

   -Trisha doesn’t know anything that the rest of us don’t. We’re just all IGNORING it. Why? Bc David’s charming and Todd and Jeff are pretty? Ridiculous. This is the last vlog squad post i’m going to make because I’m done. So the following is going to be a rundown on the “dirt” on them that made me come to the decision that I wouldn’t be supporting them anymore. I’ll also put my own thoughts and comments underneath in case y’all are curious. Staying silent about these situations is the same as complacency.     -Brandon Calvillo: Covered this but to reiterate, he dated a high schooler and slept with her/dated her knowing her age. He then lied about it in a video to cover his tracks.           *I am well aware that she was months from being 18. This doesn’t make it okay. What does a 26 year old have in common with a 17 year old? And just because this is the first girl we know about, doesn’t mean she’s the first at all or even the last.     -Durte Dom: He was accused of assault at vidcon.            *This hasn’t been confirmed. But it also hasn’t even been discussed. This girl is getting hate from vs stans and the vs have stayed silent. I can understand not wanting to show attention to people who make accusations for clout, but assault is serious and should at the Very Least be acknowledged privately or legally bc it could be considered slander. Don’t let your fans (or your friend’s fans) do your dirty work.      -Jeff Wittek: He has major anger issues. Makes jokes about assaulting women after actually having assaulted one in the past (accidentally but doesnt take away from what he did) and has made jokes about sexual harassment against men not being viable             *tbh he has a “pretty white boy complex”. Meaning he knows that he can say and do what he wants and most people will let it slide bc he’s a pretty white boy. No education needed.     -Jason Nash: Is friend’s with a predator, is quite possibly setting an awful example to his kids, namely his daughter.          *Listen. I’m a feminist, a woman should be able to decide what to do with her body after she turns 18. But being groomed and hit on by grown ass men when you’re barely legal, ain’t it. If you want to and feel ready, there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it BUT 9.9 times out of 10, that fucks a woman up in the future. One day, she is going to see her dad hitting on a 19/20 year old Tana and see that her dad’s  26 year old best friend dated a 17/18 year old and lied about specifics and might think that’s normal and how men should treat her. I won’t support that shit.

And as for all the other member’s of the vs, they either don’t care enough about what their friends or friends’ friends are doing, or they’re not bothering to even consider it’s happening and that isn’t cool either. 

Be better. 

As for Trisha, she’s had her own faults and fuckups, no doubt about it. I’m not a big fan of her content but i FELT for her. Her name has been dragged through the mud because of this more than anything else and it doesn’t sit right with me when her only real fuckup in THIS situation was bringing the ex and kids into it the way she did. Everything else either could have been avoided or she had a right to say to the public since they put everything about the relationship out in the open as much as she did. If Jason and David had reached out and admitted their own mistakes and asked her to stop talking about them online the way she was, she probably would’ve chilled out. What happened, what they and their fans (us) have done has been nothing short of traumatizing, no doubt. The way these 30 year old boys (Jeff, Todd, Scott and Jay) are reacting to her? They’re the real joke if we’re being honest.

Note: I’d also like to say that if you do still support them and have differing views than I do, I’ll respect you and your views no matter what. Everyones entitled to their opinion and thoughts. These are just mine. 

[yoolee]

About Lee

@cavern-of-bells made a FUN LIST OF THINGS so I answered them.

1. What kind of food can’t you stand?:  I fervently avoid all food that squelches – like grapes and ‘gelatinous snow fungus’ (that is a google-translated name for a mushroom in a soup my roomie from China made me once – aside from that ingredient, it was interesting). I’ve never, not once in my life, eaten Jello. 

2. If you could choose one minor inconvenience to never have to deal with again, what would you pick?:  Smoke alarm chirping. I could also happily do without pharmaceutical ads, which I think should be illegal, and election campaign ads.

3. Have you got any useless talents?:  AHAHAHA. I can sing the chipmunk Christmas song and say the alphabet backwards? I’m also hypermobile—did a stint in the local circus as a contortionist in high school. (non-animal circus – just acrobatic acts)

4. If you could be really really good at one thing, what would it be?:  Making people smile.

5. Name a few people you think are extremely good-looking: Mila Kunis, Barbara Palvin, Wendell Lissimore, Chris Evans, Zendaya Coleman, Natalie Portma, Godfrey Gao

6. What was your favorite way to pass the time as a kid?:  READING (/daydreaming about book worlds) but also figure skating while we could still afford it. It was as close to flying as I could get! 

7. What is something you’re proud of?:  When I was in my MBA program, my 59 classmates voted me ‘Most Likely to Change the World’. It’s framed next to my diplomas. Though, to be fair, it also sort of haunts me because I feel like I’m not living up to it. 

8. What’s one character flaw in people that you just can’t tolerate?:  I despise being patronized. Being ignorant and refusing to admit it in the face of facts.

9. Do you consider yourself to be more of a leader or a follower?:  Leader -  not a good one, but, I’m not a follower.

10. What kind of student are/were you?:  A really lazy, procrastinating one who still got A’s/B’s. I was a really good test taker.

11. Butterfly effect question! Has there ever been a seemingly minor decision you’ve made (at the time) that ended up having a profound influence on your life?:  Reading in class in 7th grade science. My teacher made a deal with me – if I could pass the pre-quiz at the start of every week, he’d let me read instead of pay attention, but he would get to pick the book. He introduced me to Michael Crichton and Anne McCaffery, which were my first forays into sci-fi, and my involvement in that has rippled through most of my major friend groups since. Alternately, attending a training at my first career job, which introduced me to the career I now have.

12. Name your most irrational fear/aversion: Ants. I hate ants. Where there’s one, there’s hundreds, and there’s nowhere I can go that they can’t get too, and they’re small enough to crawl in your nose and stuff. I sat in a fire ant hill as a kid, which was strike one. Strike two was moving into a house that had been abandoned for seven months when I was in third grade – turned on the tub water and it came out black there were so many ants in the pipes, and they just POURED into the tub and swarmed up the sides oh god it was like a horror movie. Other than that, most of my fears are pretty average – failure, my family being hurt, etc.

13. Are there any fictional characters you find especially relatable?:  I am self-centered enough to find myself in most characters – there’s usually one or two aspects that line up. Unless they are Lawful Good then I’m like…uuuugh. Nope, nothing there.

14. If you drink, what kind of drunk are you? Alternatively, what sort of person are you at parties?:  I am a giggly, ballet-dancing drunk. I get hyper paranoid about my spatial issues so I literally go into ballet-mode because the movements are naturally slower and more flowy. I am also pretty clingy drunk. I like to snuggle, which is funny because sober me is not big on touching or being touched. Not to overanalyze, but I think being drunk takes away the fear of that. At parties I am that awkward wall-hovering introvert who likes to find an extrovert and make them talk while I nod and wait to GTFO. I spent the entirety of my bro’s wedding reception babysitting a 4 and 5 year old because it was so much less stressful than making small talk (simultaneously playing Go Fish AND Who’s Who Monster Edition LIKE A CHAMP)

15. Do you fall in love easily? Or does it usually take a long time for you to trust someone?:  AHAHAHAHA no. I genuinely don’t think I’ve ever honestly been in love – just more fond of one person than most. Invariably, I find I prefer my own company to theirs after a time.

16. Would you rather have one close friend or 100 casual friends?:  This is a really hard one. 100 casual friends means more people to do stuff with, but, I treasure my close friends. I don’t know. Pass!

17. Do you consider yourself to be more of a slob or a neat-freak?:  I. AM. SUCH. A. SLOB. *sobs* My room should have a hazard sign.

18. Describe a place (imaginary or real) that you would find incredibly cozy: I am not feeling creative – a bedroom that cleans itself, with lots of soft, fuzzy blanket piles and pillows, with tea services (including scones!) and lots of bookshelves. A view of a duck pond would be appreciated too lololol. 

19. Do you have kids? If not, do you want them someday?: I don’t have kids. I truly treasure spending time with the kids in my family, and I work part-time as a princess/elf/storyteller at the local zoo – I like kids, but, I am a really selfish and self-centered person, and I move on to new things—including people—with serious regularity. I don’t think I would be a good parent at all. I wish I could be, but, knowing my flaws, it would be really irresponsible to have kids.

20. What was your favorite book as a child?  Elementary school – it was a book about a little black cat who went to boarding school, and there was a yellow spotted cat with a fire truck. Don’t remember the name. I also love the Wizard of Oz books (SO DARK). As a middle schooler – The Blue Sword by Robin McKinley. I needed a Mary Sue at that point in my life. Also loved the Dragonsinger series by Anne McCaffery, and everything by Mercedes Lackey and Tamora Pierce. In high school…The Things They Carried, I suppose. Now, probably Fuyumi Ono’s Twelve Kingdom’s series. It’s YA, but, the characters are so flawed, and so redeemed, I find it really interesting.

21. Name one thing you just don’t get what all the hype is about: Disney World  

22. Name one thing that you think is tragically underrated: The Emperor’s New Groove is the best Disney movie ever. ALSO, Mary Sues. Middle School me needed Mary Sues. I think most do. Go easy on ‘em.

23. If you had to be glued to a person for a month, real or fictional (who you have never met), who would you choose?: UM. HM. Someone who doesn’t need to shower to smell clean? XD Lady Luck, maybe. It would be fascinating to watch – both good and bad luck – unfold all around.

24. What’s something you’d like the chance to do someday?: This feels super arrogant – but I’d like to be a good enough author to have a book published and do a book signing. With people who actually come to get the book signed!

25. Do you typically speak your mind when you have a controversial opinion? Or do generally prefer to not rock the boat?: I like to work behind the scenes. Usually I write like a multi-page rebuttal with linked references, but I rarely post it. Sometimes I do. I call my senators roughly weekly, for what that’s worth, but public discourse is not my thing.

26. What’s the dumbest fad you’ve been caught up in?: ….uuuum. Hmm. Butterfly clips, maybe? But then, it was the 90s and I was eleven, so. 

27. What’s something you thought was cool as a kid/adolescent, but now cringe at yourself for?:  I DON’T CRINGE AT MYSELF but Dragonball Z. XD I forgive my kid/adolescent self for a lot, okay.

28. What’s a trait you consider to be very admirable?: The willingness to publically, and politely, engage in debate in service of someone else. Genuine ability to interact with other people in a way that leaves them feeling better for having interacted with you.

29. Is there a particular kind of item people always tend to give you as gifts? (For instance, people always get you things with ducks on them because you like ducks, etc.): LITERALLY, DUCKS. I love ducks. People give me ceramic ducks all the time. Also socks, because my grandma collected fancy decorative perfume bottles and one Christmas my mom and I went to like 10 stores looking for one she didn’t have and I pitched a FIT saying when I was older I was going to collect socks because you always need more, and there’s no way people would run out of options for me. My family thought this was hilarious and took me up on it. My grandpa shipped me socks from the dollar store once a month while I was in college.

30. Do you speak multiple languages? Which ones?: I wish I did! I can cuss in quite a few, and I know some conversational Irish from studying abroad there and studying it. 

31. Would you rather live in the big city or the countryside?: Having lived in both – the big city. It’s too easy to self-isolate in the countryside, and for me, personally, that’s fairly unhealthy. Countryside is definitely prettier and more peaceful, just, not for me.

32. Has there ever been something you were certain you’d hate, but ended up loving?: Literally all the time. Like, Mitsunari in SLBP for example!

33. Do you mind being the center of attention, or do you prefer the spotlight to be on someone else?: Ahahahaha give me all of the attention please /sigh

34. Favorite holiday?: Halloweeeeen. But I also really like Diwali even if I feel a little bit like I am trespassing/being a tourist. It’s just beautiful.

35. Are you a more go-with-the-flow type of person, or do you need to have things planned meticulously?: “PLANNED” AHAHAHA WHAT IS THAT WORD IDK. I am so last-minute and haphazard it’s absurd.

36. Is there something you loved so much you wish you could forget it and experience it all over again? (A tv show, book, series–anything.) : The pleasure of reading books in middle school. Those ‘first’ exposures, without expectation or standards. EVERYTHING was magical and exciting, and I devoured it all. Alternately, college. 

37. What hobbies do you have?: UM. I dress up as a princess/superhero and visit kids in the hospital which is…weird, I know. I get paid to do it at the zoo, and some parents reached out to them and asked if we could visit and then it became a thing. Less so now that I’m in a new city. Martial arts (Hapkido, Judo, Taekwondo), ballet, baking with zucchini, photoshopping, reading, writing SLBP fanfiction, playing otome games…XD

38. If you could have a superpower, but it was only mildly useful, what ability would you want to have?: THE ABILITY TO FEEL WELL-RESTED AT ANY TIME. Or good luck, but I’d argue that would be more than mildly useful. Ability to find the right thing to say to cheer someone up!

39. Something people are always surprised to learn about you: Online folks are usually surprised to learn I’m old? Friends IRL are usually surprised I’m Chaotic Evil (I won’t say I’m two-faced, I’ll say I try really hard to be nice, and I act like it well, but it is an act – I don’t genuinely possess any empathy to speak of. I will listen to you, but I probably don’t actually care, I just want to – there is a difference) and work folks are usually pretty surprised at the Chemistry background. FOLLOWERS OF THIS BLOG won’t be surprised but, I friggen love Waffle House. That usually throws people for al oop.

40. Something that took you way too long to figure out: That I’m bi? I was on BC for so long I thought I was ace, so when I finally developed a drive in my late/mid-twenties it was sort of shocking to realize it’s only rarely set to hetero, and like, I still don’t know how to act on that. ALSO for years I had no idea there was a little arrow on your gas gauge to tell you which side the gas pump’s on – comes in super handy in rental cars.

41. Worst injury you’ve had? Physically? Fell out of a tree as a kid and snapped an arm bone in half – one half went on top of the other. Other things have happened that took longer to emotionally recover, but, physically that was the worst probably. Weirdly, I fell off of the roof with no injury, but…idk I’m weirdly durable.

42. Any morbid fascinations?: Snake venom. I could probably write a dissertation. 

43. Describe your sense of humor: I LOVE PUNS. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. I like ‘smart’ humor (puns are clever) and nerdy humor, but I don’t like mean humor. I also laugh at gallows humor a lot.

44. If you had to be born in another era/place, which would you choose?: Okay this is really hard because I would be useless in most other eras and I would miss indoor plumbing and women’s rights and people not regularly dying around me. I am probably biased by being interested in times with the best myths/stories. Ancient Egypt? Viking Age? Basically any time period in China or Japan because my US-centric world history studies seriously failed me they are a bit of a fascinating mystery. 

45. Something you are irredeemably bad at: LOL this would be a long list. (you said ‘thing’ singular, I am taking that as a friendly suggestion not a mandate) Push-ups (hypermobile elbows, okay). Cleaning. LOGISTICS AND PLANNING OH LORD. Editing my own work. SMALL TALK oh god I am the worst at small talk I even took a class on it trying to get better. Gracefully accepting compliments - how does one do that and not come off as obnoxious ;.;

46. Something that sucked but you’re glad you went through: Most recently, dumping a Really Good Guy. A past me would have just quietly let it fade into oblivion and that would have been worse. I think? 

47. Would you rather have a really godawful ugly tattoo in a place that is only slightly inconvenient to conceal with clothing (upper arm, thigh, etc.), or the coolest, most beautiful tattoo ever in the middle of your face? (Neither tattoo can be removed or concealed with makeup, and the ugly tattoo will deeply offend anyone who sees it.): lololol oh my gosh. I don’t like offending people. So. I guess pretty one on my face.

48. Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist?: Eeeeeeh.I guess optimist, but that’s mostly laziness.

49. What would be the most flattering compliment someone could give you?: That I have made their life better or brighter somehow. 

50. Something you feel people often misunderstand about you: I am simultaneously incredibly confident about things and incredibly craven about people! And that’s hard for people to get sometimes. Like, my writing I am wholly confident of and proud of to the point of arrogance – as a thing. But the moment someone talks to me about it I get petrified because oh god what if I, as a person say or do something that turns them off to the point where they can’t enjoy the writing (the thing).  It’s greatly exacerbated by the internet where I can’t read tone or facial expressions – but I’m still pretty bad about this offline too. Like, I hate even going to Chipotle or Qdoba where there isn’t a big line of people (if there’s a big line of people everything is hustling and bustling and moving along) – I greatly dislike social interactions that lack a script. But, put my project in front of a board of directors or the company president, and I will kick tush and take names. It’s a weird dichotomy, but that’s how I’m wired.

THIS WAS FUN. GOOD QUESTIONS

I TAG YOU, PERSON READING THIS.

[sdhs-enjolras]

About Me

The last 1. drink: Coffee 2. phone call: Jehan. They’re one of the only people I know who still prefers calling over texting. Not that I’m complaining, of course. 3. text message: I can’t keep track of who sent the last text, because my group chat with Courfeyrac and Combeferre is currently blowing up. Every time I type an answer, another responds, so I guess both of them?? 4. song you listened to: “C’est La Mort” by The Civil Wars 5. time you cried: It definitely wasn’t the other day, when I decided to rewatch Up. Definitely not then. Okay, I lied; yes, it was. 6. dated someone twice: I haven’t dated anyone once, so… 7. kissed someone and regretted it: Haven’t actually done that, either. 8. been cheated on: Not in a romantic way, but I don’t want to give three “no”s in a row, so here’s a story: my dog, who I’d had since I was little, met Combeferre when I was in 7th grade and immediately decided that she liked him better than me. Never have I felt so betrayed. 9. lost someone special: The aforementioned dog, but luckily, that is the only real loss I’ve had to deal with so far. 10. been depressed: Nope! Yes 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: Not technically… When I was six or seven, I went to a family Christmas party and took a sip of what I thought was apple juice. If you think alcohol tastes bad when you’re planning on it, imagine how revolting it is when you’re a kid who is expecting apple juice. It was so bad that it set off my gag reflex, and ruined the party for anyone who happened to be in the room. Not a pleasant memory. 3 favourite colours 12. Red 13. Crimson 14. Scarlet in the last year have you 15. made new friends: I like to think I have. 16. fallen out of love: Nope. 17. laughed until you cried: Plenty of times. 18. found out someone was talking about you: Yeah, a couple of people. You know how high schoolers are. 19. met someone who changed you: To an extent, I think everyone I meet has an impact on me in some way. 20. found out who your friends are: I don’t think I ever didn’t know. There’s only one person who I’m unsure about. 21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: Nope. general 22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them??? Do people do that? Do they have Facebook friends who they haven’t met? Of course, I try to reach out to people on other forms of social media, but nobody even uses Facebook these days. 23. do you have any pets: Not anymore, unfortunately. I would love to get one, but nobody in my family is home often enough to justify a dog. Maybe a cat, someday. 24. do you want to change your name: I was about to say no, but that was because for a second, I literally forgot that Enjolras is...not technically my name. It’s my last name. But, it’s the only one I’ve ever really used, so, in a way, I kind of already did change it. I mean, seriously, when’s the last time anyone has ever called me Alex? 25. what did you do for your last birthday: there was a Bernie Sanders rally just a half hour from my house, so a few of my friends and I made a day out of it. We went out to eat at this amazing local diner and then went to the rally, and it was awesome! 26. what time did you wake up: 5:30. 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Planning the protest at the barber shop. You would not believe how difficult it is to get a big group of people to the same place at the same time.   28. name something you can’t wait for: Okay, if we’re being real and stepping away from the obvious, political stuff? I’m already really pumped for the next Avengers movie. What can I say? I’m a fan. 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: Just now, actually. 31. what are you listening to right now: My dad is watching the news down in the living room, and my mom is baking cookies. Dad usually does most of the baking, but her cookies are legendary. 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: I’m sure I have, at some point 33. something that is getting on your nerves: Grantaire 34. most visited website: Tumblr 35. hair colour: Blonde 36. long or short hair: Medium, I guess? If I ever straightened it, it would probably be pretty long. 37. do you have a crush on someone: No. Grantaire 38. what do you like about yourself: My determination. I think that being driven and focused is incredibly important, and while I encounter many a few instances where I want to give up, I always feel good about myself when I push through and get it done 39. piercings: None 40. blood type: O- 41. nickname: Well, my last name, I guess. Oh, and some people call me Enj. R calls me Apollo, but he’s the only one. 42. relationship status: Single 43. zodiac: Leo, but I don’t believe in all that stuff 44. pronouns: He/him 45. favourite tv show: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver 46. tattoos: None yet. Maybe someday. 47. right or left handed: Right. 48. surgery: Not yet, unless we’re counting stitches. 50. sport: Yeah, not my thing 51. vacation: France would be incredible, but I’d need to get better at the language, first. I only know the absolute basics. 52. pair of trainers: Depends on the time of year, and what I’m wearing GENERAL 53. eating: My dad made burgers tonight, and they were so unbelievably good. Sometimes, you just need a little junk food. 54. drinking: Coffee. I’m drinking it right now. Yes, it’s almost nighttime, and no, it’s not decaf. 55. I’m about to: sneak and eat some of Mom’s cookie dough while she’s not looking 56. waiting for: Mom to walk away from the bowl of cookie dough 57. want: to eat cookie dough. But, all half-joking aside, I want to make real, positive change in the world. After eating this cookie dough. 58. get married: Maybe someday, yeah, I guess. 59. career: If I live that long Politician or teacher. I’m kind of undecided WHICH IS BETTER 60. hugs or kisses: Hugs 61. lips or eyes: Eyes 62. shorter or taller: Shorter would be nice, because then I would get to be the tall one, for once. That never happens. Ever. 63. older or younger: I just realized this is in regards to dating and whatnot. I was sitting here stumped by what this question could mean for almost an entire minute before noticing the context. To answer, age doesn't matter as much as maturity. 64. nice arms or nice stomach: I don’t really notice either way. 65. hookup or relationship: Relationship, hands down. I’m way too ace for a hookup to be even slightly desirable. 66. troublemaker or hesitant: Depends on the type of trouble we’re talking about. HAVE YOU EVER: 67. kissed a stranger: Nope. 68. drank hard liquor: Outside of that Christmas party, no. 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: All. The. Time. 70. turned someone down: Maybe? Unintentionally? There have been points where the guys insist that someone was flirting/asking me out, but I never noticed. 71. sex on the first date: See my answer to #65. 73. had your heart broken: No. Yes 74. been arrested: Several times. 75. cried when someone died: Absolutely. My dog, tons of celebrities, Ellie in Up the other day... 76. fallen for a friend: Absolutely not. Grantaire DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 77. yourself: Most of the time. 78. miracles: Not really. 79. love at first sight: No. Not at all. And people who think otherwise are kidding themselves and can quickly become a troublesome distraction (fucking Marius…) 80. santa claus: Not literally, of course, but as corny as it is, I think that the joy the mere idea of him brings to kids makes him real, in a way. There’s a magic surrounding Christmas that even I can’t resist. If something so rooted in Christianity and capitalism can still somehow be my favorite day of the year, that’s something pretty special. 81. kiss on the first date: I am not experienced enough in that regard to really know how I’d feel about it. 82. angels: Nope. OTHER: 84. eye colour: Some say they’re blue, others say they’re gray. I think it depends on the light. 85. favourite movie: Oh, man, movies are such a guilty pleasure for me and I like so many that are so different from each other that I don’t think I could pick. To Kill a Mockingbird is a classic, but my dorkier side loves Captain America: the First Avenger, but on the other hand, I really enjoy Disney movies, and I don’t want to leave those out, but then there are the Harry Potter movies, and that doesn’t even cover Christmas movies, and do you see my dilemma here?

[gzdude13]

The Girl and the Closet by GZDude13

The following are select journal entries from the many journals belonging to Shelly Mary Jones

August 29, 2006 Dear Diary,

Mommy and Daddy are making me start writing in this journal after I got in trouble. Marcy is a girl in my class. I barely started the second grade. Marcy was mean to me and took my brand new markers without asking so I pushed her and called her a goober. I was sent to the office and my mommy and daddy had to come and talk to my teacher. They said I was fighting, but that was not true. The principal talked to my parents about bullying and they said they would talk to me about it too.

So today I am writing in this diary as there-a-pee or something like that. Daddy told me that if I’m mean to others then the dark eye monster will come and get me. They said that the dark eye lives in the dark parts of the world like shadows and sewers or under my bed and loves to go after bad kids. Kids that bully other kids and hit or call them mean things. My teacher says that I am too smart to be a bully and should focus on being a good student. I think from now on I will be good even if others make fun of my red hair and freckles.

From now on I will be a good girl.

January 25, 2010 Dear Diary,

I came home crying from school today. I get made fun of a lot at school even though I do my best to be kind to everyone. Today I think I reached my limit because I ended up slapping Jenny after she pulled my hair. She was mad at me because she has a crush on Brandon and he likes to talk to me during lunch. She and her group of friends came over to my table when I was alone and started saying mean things about why I always sit alone. I tried to be nice and tell her that she had the wrong idea, but she only chastised me for putting on the “good girl” act. When I tried to answer her she yelled “shut the fuck up bitch!” and pulled my hair. I didn’t mean to slap her, it was just reflex. Mom and Dad are going to be so disappointed.

I’ve heard the rumors… everyone thinks I suck up to the teacher and that’s why I get good grades. Everyone says that I only pretend to be nice and pretend to be sweet because I like the attention from the adults. My parents use to scare me with stories about the DarkEye monster to make sure I didn’t turn out to be a bully. I guess it stuck pretty well because even though I know my parents are going to flip out over me getting detention I’m more scared of going to sleep tonight because of the DarkEye monster. It’s such a stupid childish fear to have, but it’s still there.

January 26, 2010 Dear Diary,

I had a really bad nightmare last night. I went to bed still feeling really guilty over what happened with Jenny yesterday. It didn’t help that my parents were pretty upset with what happened at school either. I am effectively grounded for the next two weeks… I guess I deserve it. But the worst part was the night after. I dreamed of a black shadowy demon with the darkest glinting eyes I had ever seen. It was the DarkEye monster my parents use to scare me with. I know the DarkEye isn’t real and that it’s a childish and stupid tactic my parents used to keep me in line, but it felt real in my dream. It was pitch black yet I could still see two eyes that were darker than black and shined like polished onyx.

I woke up sweating and panting as if I just ran a million miles. The DarkEye isn’t a real thing, my parents made it up, but just in case I’m wrong I promise to be a better person. I promise to be kinder to people no matter what.

October 19, 2016 Dear Journal,

It was a fairly good day today. The student council members all met up during our open period in the morning and we agreed on all the decorations for the Halloween dance. Edgar Ochoa asked me to go with him, but I politely turned him down. Shannon doesn’t have a date and I agreed to go with her and the rest of the girls as a group. We’re all going with themed dresses and outfits. We agreed that no costumes should be allowed at the dance, only themed outfits. The teachers will be in charge of how that craziness will be defined.

As a side note, I think we have to address the issue of bullying in school again. I’m going to bring it up tomorrow because today while walking to my 5th-period class I had to step in and stop the jocks from bullying Sean Snider. He’s an easy target because he’s a little shorter than the average high schooler and a bit awkward. I can relate a little bit because I use to be made fun of for my bright red hair and pale skin. Devin Martin and Jerry Shoemaker seem to be the ringleaders in most fights and bully-related issues on campus. I’ll talk to Mrs. Hartwell and Mr. Terrance tomorrow about the issue.

July 4 2017 Dear Journal,

First off, HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! It was a fantastic day… up until the end. It was a Tuesday, so I had to go to work and then come home for a lunch break before meeting up with mom and dad for a BBQ. Keeping with our yearly tradition we headed to the park to watch the fireworks when the sun goes down. The city went all out this year! There were a ton of awesome stands selling funnel cakes, hotdogs, pretzels, and even a German wiener stand! Nothing says American patriotism quite like German sausage, haha!

But now for the negative part of my day… I saw Sean Snider again today. I honestly think he really is stalking me. I don’t get any weird messages or anything online and so far I haven’t really felt like my life is being directly affected by him, but he has come into the coffee shop several times during my work shift including today. I’ve seen him at the store while applying for classes at college, and today at the park. I literally bumped into him at the German sausage stand. I turned around to walk back to my parents to get some cash and walked right into him! I know I’ve mentioned before that I think he’s following me around, but today I think this proves it. He’s being a little creep! The way I bumped into him really disturbed me. He’s so short that when I turned around and walked into him… just… ew…

April 6, 2018 Dear Journal,

Oh god, I haven’t been sleeping well during the past few weeks. I’ve been having nightmares and end up waking up around 3:00 am. I started having nightmares around July of last year. I know what it is too; I’m stressing and letting in negative thoughts. I have to try and stay positive and polite, but honestly, some people are complete garbage! I notice that the only nights I have nightmares are the days when someone ticks me off.

The nightmares are always the same too. That stupid childish monster my mom and dad made up to keep me in line… DarkEye… In every nightmare I see it creeping after me, slowly getting closer and closer every night I dream of it. I’ve gotten into the habit of looking under my bed and in my closet just in case there are monsters hiding there... namely DarkEye. Maybe I’ll start meditating again and try to think more positively.

April 9, 2018 Dear Journal,

Between college, work, and the possibility of having a constant stalker, (I saw Snider the creep today AGAIN!), I am stressing out and people are pissing me the hell off! Every night I have the same nightmare of DarkEye coming after me. I wake up at 3:00 am and find my closet door open when I’m sure I closed the damn thing!

I’m probably just being a drama queen, but I keep up the façade of being unaffected by the bull crap people throw my way. My coworkers talk smack about me behind my back and have accused me of going as far as sleeping with the boss to get my promotion. Two of my teachers are completely incompetent when it comes to grading papers, and I swear that sniveling little hobbit, Snider, somehow memorized my daily schedule because I see him EVERYWHERE! I’m just glad he doesn’t know where I live.

April 11, 2018 Holy shit journal!

My patience is being tested today. I woke up again last night and again my closet was wide open. I’m driving myself insane because this time I could have sworn I saw a monstrous dark figure stepping out. I managed to get my desk lamp on only to find myself completely alone, seriously the DarkEye is just make-believe. Going back to sleep was hard, but I got a bit of sleep afterward and managed to make it into work on time. My coworkers were being the usual assholes again. College life is just as annoying as usual. My professors must be retarded or drunk because they don’t seem to understand the course material at all.

I need to get a hold of myself. Maybe working and going to school is burning me out. I’ll try to slow down and relax for a bit this weekend. Also, I’m going to sleep with my lamp on tonight just to try and keep the nightmares at bay. This is getting ridiculous…

On the evening of April 12th, 2018 local media reported on the brutal murder of Shelly Mary Jones. In the following weeks, police and investigators used Shelly’s journals as well as the statements of witnesses in her neighborhood to piece together the events leading up to her death in the early hours of April 12th, 2018. Shelly was found by police responding to a 911 call made by concerned neighbors who reported hearing screams emanating from Shelly’s property a few minutes after 3:00 am that morning.

She was discovered lying in a puddle of her own blood in her bedroom. Her body was covered in bruises and multiple lacerations. Evidence discovered on the scene included: A large carving knife, taken from the victims kitchen, a blood-covered baseball bat also belonging to the victim, a cellphone and camera on the outside of the victim’s bedroom window with pictures of the victim taken from the outside of her home, DNA samples on the outside of the victim’s bedroom and bathroom windows, and multiple fingerprints on and around the outside of the victim’s bedroom window.

Witnesses reported hearing screams emanating from Ms. Jones’s home a few minutes after 3:00 am. The neighbor on the east side of Ms. Jones’s property reported hearing a loud crash as if someone knocked over some trash bins. The neighbor on the west side of Ms. Jones’s property was awoken by the sound of screaming and also reported hearing a similar crash that made him step outside in time to see a short man running down the street with a visible wound on his arm trailing blood.

Further investigation proved that the camera and cellphone found on the scene belonged to a man named Sean Caleb Snider. Investigators believe that Mr. Snider had developed an unhealthy obsession with Ms. Jones. Ms. Jones wrote about her suspicions on the very matter in her personal journals. Evidence suggests that Snider allowed his unhealthy obsession to build up to the point in which he began to gain entry into Ms. Jones’s property while she was asleep.

Investigators believe that on the night of the murder, Snider gained entry into her property, retrieved a knife from her kitchen with the intent to assault Ms. Jones in her sleep. A struggle ensued which led to the death of Ms. Jones. It’s believed that the bat and knife found on the scene were both used to assault the victim. The DNA and fingerprints found on the scene of the crime came back as a match to the suspect in question, Sean Caleb Snider.

He was later arrested the same day by police who found him hiding under his bed at his parent’s house. He had sustained a similar injury as described by the neighbor that witnessed Snider fleeing the scene, furthermore, the injury matched the lacerations on the victim’s body. It’s believed that he sustained the wound during the struggle with the victim. The baseball bat must have been a weapon of opportunity.

Snider was arrested and taken to the local hospital to treat his wounds. He has not cooperated with investigators and has shown signs of extreme mental instability.

[netflixmess]

By The Fader .

In Oslo, weekend nights are everything.

That’s partly because of Norway’s strict liquor laws, and also the general social drinking culture, which both tend to encourage weekend binges. People of all ages are normally reserved during the week, keeping their heads down as they go to class and to work, rarely speaking to strangers. Come Friday, though, all bets are off.

In early October 2016, a weekend party was in full swing, at a nice flat with tall ceilings in Grünerløkka, a cool neighborhood in central Oslo. Young, good-looking people were drinking and laughing, talking and flirting. Music was playing loudly — a bass-heavy Norwegian pop song, or maybe something by an American rapper.

At one point, someone started shouting, and asked for the music to be turned down. If this was a bad movie, there might have been a record scratch sound. Following a couple seconds of chaos, it became clear what was happening: a new Skam clip had been posted to the internet. “Oh my God!” someone screamed. “I’m not prepared,” said another. Within minutes, someone had pulled it up on their phone, and the party fell silent for the whole segment, as if collectively hypnotized. Anyone who tried to speak was swiftly shut down. There were no objections: it was time to watch.

That’s exactly how it went down, at least according to Erlend, a scruffy 25-year-old who works in the Norwegian music industry. He lives in Oslo, a.k.a. the birthplace of Skam, a ridiculously popular coming-of-age drama series that depicts the lives of fictional local teenagers. Even though it’s only been around since 2015, Skam, which is produced by NRK, a government-owned public broadcaster, and the biggest media company in Norway, is one of the most adored programs in the nation’s history, with about a quarter of the four million-person population watching each clip. It might also be one of the best TV shows about high school ever made.

Skam, which means “shame” in Norwegian, is released in real-time, with zero warning. If a scene takes place at school on a Tuesday afternoon, the clip goes up on the show’s website Tuesday afternoon. If it takes place at one in the morning at a Saturday night house party, like the first scene of the third season, which Erlend and his friends watched together last year, then it’s uploaded on a Saturday night. At week’s end, the clips, which vary in length but are rarely longer than 15 minutes, are rolled into a single “episode,” which airs on television. For now, if you live outside Scandinavia, the only way to watch Skam is illegally, via fan blogs who upload the episodes, usually to Google Drive or YouTube, and write their own subtitles. In other words: they’re doing God’s work.

Every season of Skam follows a different student at Hartvig Nissen, a real public school in Oslo, where a few of the show’s main actors are actively enrolled. The first season tracks Eva, a nervous, big-hearted 16-year-old who starts high school on the outs from her old clique. Noora, a headstrong feminist who strikes up an unlikely romance up with an older, brawl-starting ladies’ man named William, is at the center of Season 2. Season 3, which aired in the final months of 2016, is all about Isak, a baby-faced teen coming to terms with his sexuality. The fourth season, which began airing the second week of April, is about Sana, a muslim teen who always speaks her mind. The day the trailer dropped, it was announced on Instagram that Sana’s season would be the show’s final one.

Though it’s entirely scripted, Skam is good at blurring the lines between drama and reality. The characters (not the actors) have their own Instagram accounts, which are updated in time with the events of the show, and their fictional text messages, written by 27-year-old web producer Mari Magnus, are posted on the Skam site between clips. Sometimes a short conversation between two characters can stir up more suspense for viewers than a whole episode. The Skam team — headed up by director, screenwriter, and all-around mastermind Julie Andem, 34 — doesn’t allow the cast to do interviews often, partly because they are actually very young, but also because they want to safeguard the show’s tightly wound universe, to preserve the illusion that these characters could almost be real.

Andem, who declined to be interviewed for this piece, doesn’t do very much press either, especially outside of Scandinavia. This strategy has created an uncommonly intense relationship between the show and its audience. Fans invest in the characters' lives as if they were their friends, refreshing frantically, waiting for a clip or a text message as if their own life depended on it. Soap operas have long provided people around the world an escape from everyday traumas. Skam is helping people cope in a new way, by making the real world a more exciting place to be. Of course it’s all just pretend, but sometimes you need to make believe if you want to feel something real.

Oslo is frigid in March, and it snows a lot — gently, on and off. For someone whose first window into Norwegian culture was watching Skam bootlegs, exploring the city is kind of like walking through a film set. Bus stops, icy parks, a line of cottages on a slanted street. Everything looks familiar, but in an uncanny sort of way. It’s clean and quiet, especially on weeknights. It’s small, too, presenting itself as its own self-contained little universe, like the inside of a snow globe.

Every person I speak to in Oslo, from the noodle-limbed checkout guy at the corner store to a middle-aged festival organizer visiting from Denmark, knows what Skam is, and most of them have seen it. When I finally meet someone who seemed to know nothing about it — my Airbnb host, a lawyer in her early 30s — it’s actually just a mixup. “Ohhh, I thought you said Scandal or something,” she says, laughing. “I love Skam. I’ve seen every episode.”

No one expected it to get this massive, at least not according to Andreas Blaauw-Hval, a 32-year-old NRK communications manager who, along with his colleague Nathalie Sprus, handles all P.R. for the show. They’re the gatekeepers of the Skam universe, fielding calls from reporters all over the world on a daily basis, and saying “no” to nearly everything. “I think a lot of journalists, and our colleagues in the TV business, find this kind of arrogant,” Blaauw-Hval says. “But it's for the best of the series.”

Sprus and Blaauw-Hval are sitting in a plain-looking coffee shop in Frogner, a pretty neighborhood that feels upscale, but not in an ostentatious way. The café appeared in an episode of Skam once, and it’s just a couple blocks from the high school at which a big bulk of the show is filmed. “It's important to emphasize that the strategy was made before anyone knew how big it would be,” Blaauw-Hval says. “Our job is to try to maintain it, to keep it low-key and exclusive.”

It’s all just pretend, but sometimes you need to make believe if you want to feel something real.

When the show was launched in 2015, it was part of NRK’s attempt to connect with older Norwegian teens who seemed to spend most of their time on Netflix, or caught up in their own lives. Its creator, Julie Andem, who’d previously worked on Jenter, an NRK show for tweens with a similar short-burst real-time release format, was meticulous about accuracy from the get-go. She spent months traveling around and interviewing Norwegian teenagers about everything: sex, drugs, dating, their friends, their fears, their dreams. A lot of the show’s characters were loosely based on real people she met, or composites of several.

Next they started auditions, sitting with 1,200 kids born between 1996 and 2000. “At first people weren’t that interested,” Andem explained in 2016, during a rare TV interview that someone translated and posted on YouTube, in which she comes across as stern but likable. “NRK hadn’t made anything for [older teens], so they were skeptical,” she said. The cast they eventually settled on included a couple locally known child actors, but was dominated by amateur young nobodies, whose raw performances help elevate Skam to greatness. When 19-year-old Lisa Teige, who plays Eva, stresses out over a Facebook message to a potential new friend, it feels not just real, but true.

When it came time to release the first clip, Andem and her team, which includes producer Marianne Furevold-Boland, shared the link with tastemakers from the audition pool, as well as the cast. “The producers wanted the kids to find the series themselves,” says Nathalie Sprus from NRK, 31, who has brown hair with highlights and is almost always smiling. “Their worst nightmare was that a parent would read a news article about ‘this new cool show for kids’ and recommended it to theirs.” Furevold-Boland says this unorthodox, rumor-based strategy “creates loyalty, and a feeling of unity and ownership among teens,” adding that despite its unprecedented success with viewers of all ages, Skam is still made with its teenage target audience in mind.

“I watch Skam because I can relate, to the people and to the parties,” says Henrik, a beer-drunk 21-year-old, in a tented bar beside a church turned concert venue. He speaks in a nasally drawl, like an extra from a Nordic remake of Dazed & Confused. He tells me about russefeiring, the extremely Norwegian tradition in which crews of graduating high schoolers literally purchase a bus to party on for a couple weeks during their final semester. The celebrations, which start after the students turn 18 and can thus can guzzle beer legally, happen all over Norway, but are a huge deal in Oslo specifically. Henrik says kids here often make plans for “russ time” years in advance. Groups have recruited pop singers to record official theme songs for their bus; a bus might spend up to $17,000 USD on music alone, an Oslo-based English-language newspaper reported in 2014.

Russ is a big plot point in Skam. Eva joins a “bus” after her skater boyfriend Jonas encourages her to make new friends. Her search leads her to Noora, a poised new girl with a thing for red lipstick; Vidle, a Type A, russ-obsessed neurotic; Sana, a smart, snarky Muslim teen; and Chris, an unrestrained goofball behind some crucial moments of comic relief. Neither cool nor explicitly uncool, they’re the sort of relatable misfits you can’t help but cheer for. “Just acknowledge that we’re losers,” Sana says to the girls during a russ meeting in the first season. “So you think you’re a loser yourself?” Vidle aks, visibly perturbed. Sana responds: “I'm a Muslim girl in a faithless country — I'm the biggest loser of them all.”

The russ subplot is mostly on the back burner in Season 3, which tells the story of Isak, a confused, self-hating teenager played by a gifted 17-year-old named Tarjei Sandvik Moe, one of the actors who attends Hartvig Nissen in real life. While the earlier seasons hinted that Isak was grappling with something, his sexuality comes to the forefront in this one, which traces his messy romance with Even, a hip, handsome classmate with secrets of his own. All of Skam is gorgeously executed, but it’s Season 3 that feels like straight-up perfect television; you’d be hard pressed to find a more authentic depiction of young queer love. Isak’s realizations, about the tricky business of loving yourself enough to care for someone else too, never feel forced. They come slowly, with lots of help from friends, in a way that feels heartbreakingly true-to-life.

“I think the third season has a really relevant and really clear theme,” explains Elise By Olsen, the 17-year-old editor of an Oslo youth culture magazine called Recens Paper, one afternoon at an indoor food market on the Akerselva river's western bank. Olsen, who is something of a budding fashion icon in Norway, is a big believer that teenagers are more capable than adults give them credit for, and says that she wishes more young people were actively involved in the day-to-day production of Skam. She says she didn’t get into watching the show live until Season 3, which impressed her by tackling issues of sexuality and mental health. “It sort of normalized this stuff, which is quite rare here in Norway,” she explains. Olsen is also friends with some of the cast, including Henrik Holm, who plays Even. “One time he tagged me in a photo and I got, like, 2,000 new followers,” she says.

In Season 2, Noora and William’s will-they-won’t-they arc helped grow the show’s audience, particularly within Norway, but it was the Even and Isak love story that took Skam to the next level. Some truly adorable screenshots of the boys cuddling went viral on Tumblr, which led people across the globe to investigate where it had come from. Now, Skam’s is one of the more voracious TV fandoms in recent memory; in March, Isak and Even came first in E! Online’s fan-picked “TV's Top Couple” contest, by winning millions of votes from fans across the world. “Not bad for a Google Drive show,” one English-speaking stan account tweeted in celebration. “That they managed to win the poll proves there's a very strong engagement,” says Norwegian academic Vilde Schanke Sundet, who has a PhD in television studies from the University of Oslo. “The Norwegians cannot vote alone — you need to get your fan community organized,” she continues. Sundet, who’s working on a post-doctoral study about Skam, says the discourse within the fan community actually mirrors the tone of show, tackling serious topics in a respectful way. There’s a comment section under each official clip, too. “You can check it almost like a newspaper, or your Facebook,” Sundet says.

Part of what makes Skam feel like a news feed is its tight production schedule. According to producer Furevold-Boland, there’s a very short time between idea and execution, which “creates a great energy among the team members,” and also allows the show to respond to real events as they happen. Season 4 will do that by focusing on Sana, who is played confidently by 20-year-old hijabi actress Iman Meskini. “The point was to make a character that chooses her own relation to her religion,” Andem said in that interview on YouTube. “She has strong faith, but she doesn’t need to relate to the whole package the culture is trying to push on her.”

Sana introduces a lot of lofty ideas to Skam, often schooling her friends by offering a different perspective — adding important context to their private dramas without ever diminishing them. “War doesn’t start with violence, it starts with misunderstanding and prejudice,” she tells Noora, whose rigid ideals are challenged throughout the show. “If you say you’re in favor of a world full of peace you actually have to try to understand why others think and act the way they do.”

Despite her typically prickly exterior, Sana has a romantic side, and is an intensely loyal friend. Fans are excited about her season because, from a narrative standpoint, there’s still a lot left to learn about her. But her story feels especially meaningful now, as conversations around islamophobia and xenophobia have never been more urgent, in Scandinavia and beyond. The same day NRK released the trailer for Season 4, a suspected terrorist attack in Stockholm killed four and wounded several others, thrusting Sweden’s open door stance towards migrants and refugees into the global spotlight. In February, Donald Trump blamed a terrorist attack that never happened on Sweden’s liberal immigration policy, and in January he signed a highly contentious and swiftly overturned executive order to keep refugees and immigrants out of the U.S., specifically targeting seven predominantly Muslim nations.

The surprising news that this will be Skam’s last season stings, but if it has to end, Sana’s story feels like a good place to stop — with a reminder that the show isn’t just fodder for insatiable fans, but important, too. Sana isn’t a real person, but she has the potential to be a visible and outspoken role model for real young women, with real stigmas, who have real needs. The trailer for her season is soundtracked by a Nina Simone cover, sung by Yusuf Islam, the artist and convert to Islam formerly known as Cat Stevens. The clip runs in reverse, making the song virtually unrecognizable. Play it forward though, and you’ll hear the words: “I'm just a soul whose intentions are good/ Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.”

Being a teenager is a beautiful mess. It’s miserable in a lot of ways, but there’s also something strangely poetic about the urgency of it all, the way your little high school world is constantly expanding and collapsing in on itself. Like the greatest shows about teenage life — My So-Called Life, Freaks and Geeks, the sometimes overly schmaltzy Degrassi — Skam never trivializes these feelings.

Even as a 26 year old, I was swept up in Skam straight away. I wish it had been around when I was younger, though I always remind myself it couldn’t have. It’s so inextricably connected to modern digital behavior, which is in itself a hopeful reflection of the things that are good about being young right now, and the way social media has created lifelines for teenagers looking for others who understand them and care what they have to say, whether they’re queer, religious outcasts, or die-hard megafans of a teen drama from Norway.

One of my personal favorite scenes is a quiet one, during which Isak opens up about his sexuality to his best friend Jonas. He tells him that he has romantic feelings for Even after school, over kebabs. Jonas doesn’t flinch; it’s obvious he doesn’t mind who his friend dates. It’s borderline tear-jerking in its casualness, a total non-event. One afternoon, I ride past the kebab shop from that same scene. I pull out my phone to snap a photo of the storefront, and one of the employees in the window, who’s probably getting used to fans appearing out of nowhere, laughs and covers his face.

Later, I walk into an old church with big wooden doors and a clock tower steeple. It’s the setting of another emotional scene from Isak’s season, one that aired a little before Christmas. It features a cameo by Norwegian performance artist Nils Bech, who sings a haunting, Swedish-language rendition of “O Holy Night,” in this very church.

When, on another night, I share a drink with Bech in the back of a crowded bar downtown, he says his cover of the iconic holiday staple was a kind of political statement. He relates the song’s biblical lyrics about God’s son dying for our sins to LGBTQ folk’s long-term struggle for visibility; to him, the words are directed at his gay peers, urging them to think about those who fought for equality before them. “I wanted to say, Hey people! Remember that someone, in a way, died for us to be able to be us!” Like the song, Skam itself is a symbol of how far we’ve come, and a reminder of how much work is left to do.

The reaction to the track was wild, Bech says, with admiring notes from fans and other artists pouring in straight away — a testament to the power of Skam. I asked what he thinks it is about the show that reaches people in such a unique, special way. “When you fall in love, it's always so fucking difficult,” he says, laughing. “And I love the way [Julie Andem] showed that. I think a lot of people watching realized, ‘Oh, it's not about being gay or straight or whatever — love is love.’” He took a sip of beer. “At least that’s why I like it so much.”

Late last year, it was announced that an English-language remake of the show is in the works for U.S. and Canadian audiences, with backing from American Idol producer Simon Fuller. Most Skam fans I talk to are skeptical to say the least, sometimes citing MTV’s tone deaf, too-faithful take on the U.K.’s druggy high school show Skins as an example of just how terribly these translations can go. The real-time rollout and the digital elements can be replicated easily, but the content can’t. “If the show wasn't good, you wouldn't let yourself be so engaged,” Vilde Schanke Sundet tells me.

“I think a lot of people watching realized, ‘Oh, it’s not about being gay or straight or whatever — love is love.’” —Nils Bech

Skam has earned large fan groups in a lot of places, including but not limited to the U.K., the Philippines, China, and the United States. For supporters who stop in from out of town, there is a map of shooting locations on VisitOslo.com, the city’s official travel guide. But there’s occasionally some tension between local fans and tourists, and some Norwegians feel like they understand the show in a more significant way than their international counterparts.

“Norwegian fans are really protective,” Sundet says when we meet in a gift shop near the entrance of The Vigeland Park, a huge sculpture garden full of twisty, snow-covered footpaths, before explaining the unspoken cultural rules known as the Law of Jante, which prohibits citizens from ever thinking they’re superior to anyone else. “They will tell international fans off, saying, ‘You can't go into the school,’ or ‘You need to ask before you take the pictures,’” she explained. “This is a social democracy, so the idea of someone sticking out is strongly bound in our culture. We don't have the kind of superstars that you have in Hollywood.”

That famous and non-famous people have been historically afforded the same level of respect and attention in Norway adds a layer of relatability to Skam, and helps the stories feel more personal. But the show is also a straight-up global phenomenon, one that has pushed the small Nordic society into uncharted waters by complicating these long-standing ideas about what it means to “stick out.” It’s all emblematic of another reason the show is so intoxicating: it’s reflecting back small ways the world is changing, in real time.

One night, I walk around Oslo at dusk. I walk past book shops and clothing stores and chain coffee shops and markets. I walk past churches and houses and apartments and parks. I look at the people who pass me on the street. I look at their bulky scarves and puffy jackets and fuzzy wool gloves. At some point, I start to see the Skam characters in all of their faces.

For one second, I convince myself that I actually do see Henrik Holm — the actor who plays Even, Isak’s dreamy love interest. If it is him, he’s walking fast in the opposite direction, talking into a cell phone and dragging a suitcase behind him. Suddenly, for a split second, we’re right next to each other and out of the corner of my eye, I decide that it’s really him. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure. I awkwardly stop walking and whip around, but he’s got long legs and a quick stride, and is already on the next block.

[theconservativebrief]

Ten years ago this month, the first Twilight movie sparkled broodily into movie theaters. By then, the four-volume book series had already been published in full, made the best-seller lists several times over, and was safely established as a cult phenomenon for its target demographic of teen girls — but with that first movie, Twilight became mainstream.

In the fall of 2008, America at large was introduced to the story of Bella Swan, teenage everygirl, and her fraught, star-crossed love for glitter-streaked vampire Edward Cullen. Twilight introduced us to Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson, and it continued the Harry Potter tradition of the YA book-to-movie franchise as a dominant box office force.

It also became a cultural flashpoint. Think piece after think piece by turn celebrated Twilight’s cultural dominance, mocked its shimmery vampire mythology, and feared the effects that romanticizing its tortured, dysfunctional love story might have on its teen readers. In 2008, Twilight was adored, but it was also hated, feared, and mocked.

Here in 2018, we finally have room to get a little perspective on the whole thing. In celebration of the 10-year anniversary of the first Twilight movie, Vox culture writers Constance Grady, Alex Abad-Santos, and Aja Romano joined forces with deputy managing editor Eleanor Barkhorn to look back at the unlife and legacy of the Twilight phenomenon.

Constance: When the first Twilight movie came out in 2008, I was 19, and I was positive that the entire franchise was a blight on the pop culture landscape. Before the movie even came out, I made up my mind about it. I read the posts about how the Edward-Bella love story ticked all the boxes of an abusive relationship; I shook my head over Stephenie Meyer’s bland, boring sentences; I howled over the whole concept of everything that happened in Breaking Dawn. (He chews the baby out of her uterus!)

But I was also completely fascinated by the franchise. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I picked up the first book to see what the fuss was all about, and even though I thought the love story was creepy and the prose was blah and absolutely nothing happened until about three-quarters of the way through the book beyond some vampire baseball (vampire baseball!), I kept turning those pages. I was compelled. I couldn’t help myself.

I hate-read every Breaking Dawn review, and every review of the movie. I developed opinions on Kristen Stewart (bit her lip too much) and Robert Pattinson (I appreciated his palpable hatred of the franchise). I spent so much emotional energy thinking about the whole Twilight thing that I was, for all intents and purposes, a fan. I was just a fan who hated it.

Looking back 10 years later, I don’t think I was necessarily wrong about most of the things I disliked about the franchise then. Bella and Edward’s relationship does have some disturbing power dynamics (which we’ll get into in a bit). Myer’s prose is pretty bland. The structure of the plot is bananas. (I was wrong about Kristen Stewart, though, and the way she was penalized for sometimes seeming mildly uncomfortable with the Twilight phenomenon while Pattinson was lauded for his outright hatred of it says a lot about gender politics circa 2008.)

But I also think that I clearly found Twilight really compelling when I was 19, and I was mad about that, because smart girls weren’t supposed to like books and movies like Twilight. There’s a weird, creepy eroticism to those books that is calibrated to speak precisely to the sexual and romantic fantasies of teenage girls, and I was a teenage girl. It did speak to me. And that pissed me off.

There are few pop cultural products that our society likes to shit on more than the pop culture created for teenage girls, and Twilight circa 2008 was the pinnacle of that phenomenon. This was a franchise that was built for teen girls, marketed to teen girls, and loved by teen girls, and because of that, it became accepted common knowledge that all correct-thinking people could only despise and revile it. So when I look back 10 years later, I find it difficult to untangle my hatred of Twilight from my own internalized misogyny, and from my profound and at the time unexamined belief that anything made for teenage girls must inherently be less-than.

How did you feel about Twilight back in 2008? Has it changed for you since then?

Eleanor: I was 24 when the first movie came out, and I think being just past teenagehood made all the difference for me. I loved the movie — fully, earnestly, without irony, without reservations. I loved the moody Pacific Northwest setting. I loved the longing glances. I loved the vampire baseball! (But then I am a sucker for the “characters with superpowers show off their superpowers” scene that these movies always tend to have. Ask me how I felt watching Tobey Maguire leap from Queens rooftop to Queens rooftop in the 2002 Spider-Man.)

I had spent my teenage years full of feelings, full of angst, full of deep, painful crushes on mysterious boys. And I’d mostly felt embarrassed by those feelings. I wanted to be calm, detached — a Cool Girl, to reference Gone Girl, another best-selling book turned hit movie. Seeing Bella feel so many of the things I’d felt was tremendously validating. I was normal! I’m okay, you’re okay, etc.

The fact that I watched the movie at 24 instead of 19 also meant that Twilight inspired a fair amount of nostalgia for me. By my mid-20s, I was no longer having those intense feelings anymore. I was turning into a much more practical, grounded person — realizing that I should be looking for stability, kindness, and shared values in the men I dated, rather than hotness or mysteriousness.

This was a necessary step in my maturation as a human being. (I’m very glad to be married to my kind, stable husband, whom I met at church, rather than the hot guy in my algebra class who sometimes showered me with attention and sometimes ignored me.) But it came with a sense of loss — intense teenage feelings have a particular joy and drama to them.

Twilight came at just the right moment for me to be a fan: I was close enough to my teenage years to appreciate the validation of my feelings, but far enough away that I could appreciate, rather than be embarrassed by, the romanticization of those feelings.

And that’s why I never fully understood all the hand-wringing about whether Twilight was “good” for women, or whether Bella was a “good role model” for girls. Pop culture doesn’t need to be instructive to be good. It can simply show people as they are, rather than as they should be. Bella isn’t a character I want to be like as an adult, or want my daughters to be — but that’s fine. Fiction for young people is full of spunky, plucky young women role models. It’s okay for Bella to capture a particular way that many young women are — even if, with the benefit of a few years of hindsight, we recognize that’s not the way we want to be forever.

Alex: I mean, I understand the hand-wringing and analysis of whether Bella is a “good role model” because of Twilight’s audience. The books were being consumed by teenage girls (and younger-than-teenage girls), and the natural response from adults, when it comes to any piece of culture as popular as Twilight was, is to fret over “what is it teaching the children?”

Many adults seem to believe that books for younger audiences should follow a certain moral code or provide some kind of moral guidance. Though overhauling the way we teach kids about books and how we approach books ourselves warrants its own entire article.

I read New Moon — the one where Bella wants to die so Edward will come and save her — and I’ve seen every movie except Breaking Dawn Part I. I guess my main impression of that one book and the four movies (I don’t want to speak for Stephenie Meyer’s entire oeuvre) is that Twilight is both a not-so-well-written book and a mildly exciting movie franchise.

But like Constance said, it gets criticized exponentially harder than other pieces of pop culture because teenage girls like it. I think some of that criticism is warranted, in that the book wallows in shallow descriptions, but it gets magnified because of who its target audience is.

One of the things I wish the movies had done more of was lean into the vampire action. There wasn’t enough vampire baseball. If you’re gonna give these vampires magical superpowers — elemental manipulation, mind-reading, pain projection, etc. — then show us those powers. Make it seem cool to be a vampire. Or at least make it seem cooler to be an immortal high schooler than Twilight often did, with the characters just trolling around a Pacific Northwest high school looking for an eternal mate.

Aja: We also can’t really talk about whether Twilight was instructive or not without talking about the kinds of real-world legacies it left us with — including a full decade and counting of YA novels with extremely problematic relationships at their centers. Despite the many red flags flying around Bella and Edward’s relationship — starting with their 87-year age difference, his stalking and controlling behavior, and the fact that he wants to bite her more than any other human he’s ever met, fans loved the couple. And because plenty of Twilight fans were so interested in their codependent passion, publishers started marketing books that featured similar relationships as a selling point.

(One of the most disturbing of these books was Hush, Hush, a New York Times best-seller that featured a hero who literally stalks, threatens to sexually assault, and tries to kill the teen protagonist. It’s a controversial book that’s currently being made into a movie, so the phenomenon is still very much with us.)

But we also have a whole generation of Twilight fans who turned the publishing industry on its head with their insistence and demand for trope-filled stories that indulged their fantasies. And their unashamed consumption of a brand of media that nakedly catered to them arguably presaged the flourishing romantic comedy resurgence we now appear to be in the middle of.

Twilight fans were also responsible for one of the most remarkable and underdiscussed publishing phenomena in history, in that they essentially built an entire new publishing genre from scratch. They started by creating a controversial but very effective system of pull-to-publish Twilight fanfiction — stories that centered on Bella and Edward analogues, without any copyrighted names or details. Then, backed by the money and enthusiasm of ravenous Twilight fans who wanted to read more, more, more, they created their own small-press publishing houses in order to ship those fics-turned-novels directly to their audiences.

It was from one of these Twilight fandom publishing houses, created for and by Twilight fans, that Fifty Shades of Grey — which was originally a massively popular Twilight fanfic called “Master of the Universe” — originated. By blowing the doors wide open on the potential financial power of fanfiction, and introducing it to mainstream culture for the first time, Fifty Shades of Grey forever changed publishing. And it wouldn’t have existed without this very specific way in which Twilight fans commercialized their fandom.

We could debate endlessly whether the marketing of any of these fics was “good” or “morally instructive,” but I do believe these fans were galvanized to do what they did because they were forced to spend years defending their hobby and their reading pleasures. And we all know the best way to defend your hobby is to find a way to make money from it.

Constance: Aja brings up a great point here: Twilight was such a giant franchise that it had a real effect on pop culture. So what do you think is its most lasting legacy?

An interesting counterbalance to the wave of YA romances about creepy, mysterious, controlling boys that Aja correctly pegs to Twilight’s popularity is that Twilight also fundamentally changed the way we talked about those romances. Before Twilight, they were considered silly and fun and not really worth critiquing, but the criticism of Twilight was so heated and so pointed that it ended up influencing the discourse around practically all relationships built on the Bella-Edward model.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer is a lot more sophisticated about the power dynamics of its relationships than Twilight was, but I don’t know that it could have gotten away with a ship like Buffy-Angel in a post-Twilight era. When Buffy first aired, a scene where Buffy wakes up in the middle of the night to find Angel sitting on her windowsill passed without comment, but after Edward Cullen, it became one of the scenes that people brought up when they talked about why they don’t like that pairing. That’s because one of the things the hand-wringing over Twilight established is that it is creepy when a boy breaks into a girl’s bedroom to watch her sleep, the way Edward does with Bella.

And The Vampire Diaries, the next big vampire romance franchise after Twilight, went out of its way to subvert any Twilight comparisons with its central romance between Stefan and Elena. That show very pointedly played the big reveal that Stefan was a vampire in an echo of the famous “Say it!” / “Vampire,” scene in Twilight, but in this version, Elena ran screaming in the other direction as soon as she realized what Stefan was. There’s even a scene in one episode where Elena is watching Stefan sleep, rather than the other way around, and he tells her it’s creepy.

There’s plenty for us to critique about the gender politics of The Vampire Diaries, but it’s a show that clearly wanted to be the woke alternative to Twilight, and the way it positioned itself to take that slot was by subverting the tropes that the Twilight discourse had established were gross.

Eleanor: The only love triangle YA story I really got into after Twilight was The Hunger Games, which provided an interesting (but also maddening) foil to Twilight. I saw The Hunger Games get treated a lot more seriously as a franchise because of its apparent critique of income inequality (the movie came out just months after Occupy Wall Street), and because Katniss was in so many ways the anti-Bella: tough, resourceful, independent. Also in The Hunger Games’ favor: Jennifer Lawrence, who played Katniss, was much, much better at the celebrity image game than Kristen Stewart.

But I found everything about The Hunger Games a little too perfect; the good role model protagonist and the “serious” commentary on today’s social issues was all a bit much. I still appreciate Twilight’s stubborn refusal to be anything more than what it was: an evocative, albeit problematic, teen love story that took its characters’ feelings seriously.

Would it be a stretch to call movies like Brooklyn and Lady Bird part of the legacy of Twilight? Of course, they’re in an entirely different genre; they’re also more nuanced and better acted, and the relationships at their center are largely absent of the troubling power dynamics we discussed above. But they fill a place in my heart that Twilight once did, for the way they show that the stories of young women and their romantic choices are important and worthy of deep study.

Alex: The world would be a better, kinder place if everyone was required to watch Brooklyn. Though I’m not sure if it and Lady Bird are a part of Twilight’s legacy or are simply terrific stories about teenage girls growing up that haven’t been given the credit they’re due.

Twilight’s more direct legacy is Fifty Shades of Grey and the phenomena — the backlash and the fandom — that followed it. Right? When Fifty Shades came out, article after article depicted and chided its readers as desperate, horny middle-aged women. The book was considered “mommy porn.” Like Twilight, Fifty Shades is no beautiful tome of language. But the criticism of it seemed amplified because women, particularly women of a certain age, were really into it. And If there’s one demographic whose taste people like to judge more than that of teenage girls, it has to be moms. Poor moms.

Aja: I definitely think we can’t discount the fact that a lot of the teen girls who got vilified for loving Twilight grew up and got vilified for loving New Adult erotica, so I’m doubling down on the stance that Twilight’s legacy is creating a generation of women who became loud and proud about their fictional kinks as a result of being perpetually shamed for them. I want to think that ultimately, this confidence outweighs all of Twilight’s problematic tropes.

I will add that Twilight sparked a weird purity backlash in YA literature whereby depictions of sex and sexuality between teens became newly taboo, in part because of all the hand-wringing over Twilight and its ilk. I think that’s taken a while to wear off, in part because Twilight’s imprint was so indelible.

Also, there’s one really obvious thing Twilight bequeathed us, simple but huge, and that’s “Team X” and “Team Y.” Twilight made shipping, and discussion of shipping, a standard part of the pop culture discourse around media franchises, and it did so specifically via “Team Edward” and “Team Jacob.” (And the perennial underdog, Team Bella.) These ideas — and the specific concept of shipping as rooting for your pairing or character, or “team,” to win the love triangle — entered the pop culture landscape with Twilight, and now they’re ubiquitous. And crucially, by framing shipping as a pastime akin to rooting for a sports team, they made shipping into something harmless and fun rather than yet another toxic, galling thing to shame fans for doing. If only for this, I am Team Twilight all the way.

Original Source -> Reckoning with Twilight, 10 years later

via The Conservative Brief

[missmarnie-blog1]

MARNIE HUNT: A Family Portrait

top row (left to right): Harvey George Hunt, Marnie Daphne Hunt, Jessica Emily Edwards (née Tate) bottom row (left to right): James Richard Edwards, Penelope Grace Edwards, Devin Elizabeth Edwards

Harvey

Relation: Father (Close)

Age: 52

Occupation: Professor of Religious Iconology at Yale

FC: Simon Baker

Bio: TW: Death, Religion

Harvey Hunt spent most of his childhood in church. His grandfather was a preacher, his father played the organ and his mother sang in the choir. He attended Sunday school, he learnt scripture until he knew it like the back of his own hand, he would hum hymns around the house. Harvey was a good church boy until his grandfather was killed during a missionary trip in South America. He couldn’t understand how God could so mercilessly take him away, when he had been so faithful, when he had been serving him. The crisis of faith began and at seventeen he was left without the security of the one thing he had always been certain about. It wasn’t until his freshman year of college that he began to show an interest in God again, or more specifically an interest in religion. He tried to make sense of the importance that faith had held throughout history, throughout cultures, and while he could never quite bring himself to believe so fully again he did find it fascinating. He switched majors to History with Religious Studies and somewhat unknowingly set the course for the rest of his life.

In the Summer before he started his PhD he met Jessica Tate, funny and lively - everything that he wasn’t. It was love at first sight, for Harvey at least, and he spent the warm months following every adventure her heart took her on. When Marnie was born almost a year later, he decided that parenthood would be the best adventure yet.

Being left with a five year old was hard, losing the love of his life was hard, but when Harvey looked at his little girl and saw her devouring books or rescuing a stray kitten, he couldn’t bring himself to ever forget meeting Jessica. She gave him Marnie and so he has always preached that it’s much better to have loved and lost than never loved at all. He worries about his daughter, that by tethering herself to her soulmate she may end up without that same love in her life.

Jessica

Relation: Mother (Not Close)

Age: 50

Occupation: Event Planner

FC: Ellen Pompeo

Bio:

When Jessica was born her mother had hoped that she would be sugar and spice and all things nice, after four sons all her parents wanted was a calm little angle. They didn’t get one. Instead she followed her older brothers everywhere; she played baseball, she sneaked out to parties, she crashed her father’s car. Anybody could see she was a wild child, always seeking adventure and not wanting to be tied down. So when that little feather darkened and fully developed on her back, when the dreams started so vividly that they couldn’t be ignored, she ran as fast as she could and didn’t stop until she was forced to.

That force came in the form of Harvey Hunt, mild mannered and a total gentleman who walked into her section at the diner and stuttered his way through an introduction. He blushed and she smiled and before she knew it he was her nice big adventure. She had three months left of her six month lease, she wanted to spend them lost in a Summer fling. Unfortunately her own reckless nature meant that this was no fling at all, by September she was picking out names with him and trying not to panic over the little life inside of her.

And she didn’t. When Marnie was born, Jessica wondered how she had ever been worried about this, about the love and warmth that filled heart from the moment she held her daughter. It worked for years, in fact she had almost forgotten about her mark when she literally banged into James Edwards at the local grocery store. And then she felt it, how Harvery had described meeting his best friend, that instant connection that just means you know. Her heart broke, of course it did, when she left Marnie behind, but she wasn’t sure she’d ever recover if she lost her chance with James.

James

Relation: Step-Father (Not Close)

Age: 56

Occupation: Lawyer (Senior Partner)

FC: Gary Oldman

Bio:

The Edwards were not a happy family. They were rich, they were powerful, but they were not happy. James would have liked to say that it was because his parents weren’t soulmates, they were just no people who had say the practical side to marrying each other, but he knew that really some people are just born to be miserable. And so he was determined not to be. He went out of his way to find sources of happiness however small they might be. He partied hard, he jumped out of planes and climbed Kilimanjaro. He wanted that rush of adrenaline and satisfaction, but even he could see that it was all just distraction.

He wanted to meet her. His ultimate source of happiness. The One. His soulmate. He wasn’t sure how he would meet her, but he was sure that it wouldn’t be as unspectacular as going to fetch his ailing aunt some groceries while he was in town visiting. It definitely wasn’t with a pre-schooler by her side. He was sure that it had to be some kind of mistake, that this seemingly happy woman had to have just been a pretty face that made his heart flutter in ways it hadn’t before, but he just couldn’t stay away. He hated how dirty their secret meetings felt, but the more time he spent with Jessica the more he knew that she was who he had been waiting on.

The worst part of finding her, the only part that made his gut retch was how badly it effected Marnie. He wanted to know the girl, his wife loved her so much how could he not too, but she had very little interest and he couldn’t find it within himself to blame her. The one time they attempted to take her overnight she had screamed and cried for her father, her real father, until he had come to get her and after that James learnt to keep his distance during the short time he spent with his step-daughter.

Penelope

Relation: Half-Sister (Not Close)

Age: 19

Occupation: Freshman at NYU (Major: Media Studies)/Part-time Waitress

FC: Stefanie Scott

Bio:

For as long as Penelope can remember there always seemed to be something missing from her family. The lived in a nice house, in the hustle and bustle of San Francisco but on a nice street with other kids her age. Her parents were soulmates, just like almost everybody else’s parents, and she had been a big sister for almost as long as she could remember. So for all intents and purposes they were perfectly average, and yet there was always something that she couldn’t quite put her finger on.

The answer came when she was six and her first grade teacher asked her to do her family tree. She had thought it was easy. She knew her family after all. There was only her mommy and daddy and her little sister. It was only when her mother put down a photo of Marnie, their friend that they went and visited a few times a year, that she understood what was so off. Marnie wasn’t a friend, she was her sister - her older sister - and at first she was confused about how that could be. Her mother and father were soulmates, how could she have a child with somebody else.

As Penelope grew so did her understanding of the situation and with that came disgust. She couldn’t look at her mother without remembering that she had just abandoned her first child, she struggled to understand how her father could justify the hurt he had caused a family. The magic of soulmates was gone, she couldn’t see the beauty when she knew that it had the potential to hurt. Suddenly she felt guilty for all that she had, so totally unaware that Marnie wasn’t miserable without their mother. In hopes to make amends with her sister, as though she could somehow make up for the destruction her parents’ relationship had caused, she moved to New York and almost immediately made the trip down to Kingston. Imagine her surprise when her sister turned down her apology and politely told her never to call in unannounced again, after she’d finished off the plate of cookies herself. Every so often Marnie will get a call from her, but she never answers and Penelope is so unsure as to why.

Devin

Relation: Half-Sister (Not Close)

Age: 16

Occupation: Freshman in High School

FC: Sabrina Carpenter

Bio:

Devin wasn’t like her sister, she wants for nothing. She wakes up everyday with the sun ready to kiss her skin, her hair tied up in a ponytail for cheer practice and most recently her new car keys jingling in her hand. Even as a child she would almost dance around Connecticut during their visits, while Penelope looked to the ground and muttered about how wrong it felt. She takes nothing too seriously and lives entirely in the moment, perhaps a little too much like her mother for her own good.

She doesn’t care if her parents are in love or if they are soulmates, she doesn’t care for who had to be hurt or torn apart for her existence and she certainly doesn’t think much about meeting her own soulmate one day. While some girls in her class count down the days until their dreams will start or others proclaim that the whole thing is a placebo effect created by the markings, Devin dreams of seeing the world and plans out the journeys she will take some day.

It may seem cruel to some, but she hardly spares a thought for her half-sister. While Penelope has grown so close to her, or more accurately the idea of her, Devin barely thinks of Marnie as a sister. It’s been years since the two have seen each other, the most contact being the gift vouchers her older sister sends on her birthdays or at Christmas, and that’s just the way she likes it. Devin’s life is good just how it is, she doesn’t see a need for anything to change.

[baekhoneyed]

tagged by @kokokysoo for one of those “get to know me” memes! (under the cut cuz its so long)

RULES: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people (idk how many people ill end up tagging and dont feel obligated!!)

THE LAST:

1. Drink: water but like i think my flatmates put vodka in the ice cube trays so?? not sure exactly how much is accidentally Not Water

2. Phone Call: uhhhhh a study abroad program advisor

3. Text Message: my older brother tryna convince me that i’ll make friends eventually lmao

4. Song you listened to: i actually stopped writing this to grab a sweater but then TT came on and i instinctively dance to it now so that happened

5. Time you cried: almost last night but like... not enough feelings to actually cry yet just wait

6. Dated someone twice: never even dated someone once, bro...

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i never regret giving my dog kisses but sometimes my cat swipes at me :/

8. Been cheated on: gotta have a boyfriend first to get cheated on

9. Lost someone special: yup

10. Been depressed: only since i was 12 years old  l m f a o

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i hate puking so i never go past being tipsy

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. red!

13. millennial pink fight me

14. rose gold fight me again

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yyyes but i sure would like to make some more Here, at my Current University

16. Fallen out of love: mmm not Love but definitely Like? i stopped Liking someone who i had a crush on

17. Laughed until you cried: so frequently it’s worrisome

18. Found out someone was talking about you: um did u mean middle and high school? i was such a petty bitch tho i put em in their places after crying in my room alone lmfao

19. Met someone who changed you: yes yes yes! dallon is the first who comes to mind he’s... no words

20. Found out who your friends are: ummm i dont know?

21. Kissed someone on your facebook list: ...my mom??? lmao

GENERAL:

22. How many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them except a few who ive just added bc we’re all transfer students to the same university this year and im Desperate

23. Do you have any pets: yes!! 2 cats, Harry and Kai (shut up ok i’ve always liked that syllable in chinese) and one dog, Lady my perfect cuddle angel baby

24. Do you want to change your name: honestly... sometimes yeah? but only because it’s so boring when it’s translated into chinese/korean so maybe i’d just change my names in those languages idk

25. What did you do for your last birthday: probably just went out to dinner w/ my family, but when i got back to my old college my friends and i went to a store in Queens it was such a good day...

26. What time did you wake up: like... noon probably lmao #depression

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: rewatching exo next door and gettin emotional over ksoo

28. Name something you can not wait for: THE POWER OF MUSIC BITCH LESS THAN 12 HOURS NOW

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: a couple weeks ago when she and my dad helped me move in to my apartment

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i didnt have fucking depression! anxiety is easy to deal with for me but depression isnt

31. What are you listening to right now: walk on memories

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i have a 2nd cousin named Tom he’s like 50 years old

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: ......so much

34. Most visited website: netflix/facebook/tumblr

35. Mole/s: one on my back, one on my neck, one under my left boob... i think that’s it

36. Mark/s: mostly bruises on my shins bc im clumsy; also some shaving scars from like 3+ years ago (one of em bled for 4 days while i was in china!)

37. Childhood dream: typical american kid stuff like ballerina and movie star

38. Hair color: medium brown i guess? it used to be lighter but it’s been getting darker as i get older

39. Long or short hair: i just cut it short again so it’s just touching my shoulders when dry (it’s wavy-curly so it’s a bit longer than that in reality)

40. Do you have a crush on someone: yeah can i have uhhhhhhhh byun baekhyun? no one irl tho

41. What do you like about yourself: ive got a great complexion that has really calmed down in the past few years! and i love my eyes ive got gorgeous eyes and a nice smile and a cute body and ive been doin self-love the past year can u tell?

42. Piercings: just regular ear piercings that i only got... a year ago...

43. Blood type: i never remember but maybe O? whichever one is the most common i think idk tho

44. Nickname: lulu is a nickname, ummm ive had a few friends call me em or ems which is cute

45. Relationship status: chronically single and repulsive to the male population, perhaps?

46. Zodiac: sun in pisces/leo rising (fun fact when i was little a kid asked me my sign so i said pisces and he called me fish poop so i cried) (he was probably a gemini the fuckin asshole), year of the tiger

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favorite tv show: pushing daisies, 30 rock, scrubs, grey’s anatomy but only up til the 8th season then it’s bad

49. Tattoos: i actually almost got one a few weeks ago but then i lost my job :/ i wanted to get “je ne regrette rien” tattooed on my hip bone real small

50. Right or left handed: right - i used to be able to write pretty well with my left hand but alas...

51. Surgery: yyyup wisdom teeth removal, eyelid surgery to get rid of some bumpy things, broken arm when i was like 1.5 years old, and im getting lasik next summer probably

52. Piercing: ya already asked ya doofus

53. Sport: my dad made me play basketball in middle school i got 2 technical fouls bc i had anger issues so i stopped playing basketball. i got Decent at ballet tho!

54. Vacation: we havent really had the money lately

55. Pair of trainers: i just bought 2 new pairs bc i ruined my only pair in seoul and had to throw them out (they got soaked in the rain and then mildewed n all) (side note: they’re so expensive?? the adidas and nike were as expensive as the new balance which is Silly so i just bought adidas and nike)

MORE GENERAL:

56. Eating: nothing rn but i need to go get dinner...

57. Drinking: did we not already go over this

58. I’m about to go: either to the dining hall or to a nearby restaurant im honestly not sure 

59. Waiting for: exo to move in next door to me only to discover that one of them is my childhood best friend-slash-first love and another has fallen in love with me and my clumsy but lovable personality :)

60. Want: byun baekhyun (im kidding kind of, um i want to make friends here and be less anxious about my classes and life in general)

61. Get married: yeah one day but so far no one i’ve met is Vibing with that seeing as no one will even ask me out im not Super Hopeful :/

62. Career: chinese major/korean minor at a university um hopefully after i graduate someone will hire me and give me money to do something i dont completely hate but we’ll see

WHICH IS BETTER:

63. Hugs or kisses: i literally would not know so i will say Hugs because they’re the only things ive experienced! and i could use a really long hug rn

64. Lips or eyes: ...eyes... but lips r important too cuz i cant even look at a photo of amy schumer anymore w/out staring at her terrifying lips

65. Shorter or taller: taller but someone around my height would be ok too (.....im just sayin im like the same height as bbh...)

66. Older or younger: older bc im not about to go dating a freshman or a high schooler lmfao

67. Nice arms or nice stomach: arrrrrrrrms

68. Hookup or relationship: never had either but i think i’d prefer a stable relationship to some extent?? we just dont know

69. Troublemaker or hesitant: im a troublemaker when im comfortable w/ people/places but other than that hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

70. Kissed a stranger: no

71. Drank hard liquor: yeah it’s nasty :/ but it does the trick

72. Lost glasses/contact lenses: somehow no

73. Turned someone down: ya this one guy hit on me when i was walking thru myeongdong but he was a) a stranger b) 25 years old c) from egypt so like it was never gonna happen buddy

74: Sex on the first date: gonna need a first date before i can even answer (the answer would be no i am not down w/ that) 

75. Broken someone’s heart: probably not, ill dont think im capable of doing that plus im still so young that realistically it just hasnt been a possibility

76. Had your heart broken: not really, my silly crushes have all been resolved easily bc i never talk about them and then i notice things i dont like about the person and stop liking them like that

77. Been arrested: no but a friend of mine got arrested for trespassing on a roof in nyc last year lmao

78: Cried when someone died: yeah

79. Fallen for a friend: sort of? briefly? it never went anywhere it was silly

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

80. Yourself: i try to most days but it’s rough

81: Miracles: i mean im not a non-believer but i also don’t actively wait for them to happen or really put much stock in them

82. Love at first sight: im not sure because bbh hasnt seen me yet so how would we know??

83. Santa Claus: not anymore i think when i was 8 i sorta stopped

84. Kiss on the first date: never even had a first date or a first kiss ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

85. Angels: um yeah actually! proof they exist - byun baekhyun do kyungsoo kim jongdae kim jongin the list goes on,,

OTHER:

90. Current best friends: dallon, lilli, ida, stephanie, aria!

91: Eye color: light green. i have Gorgeous eyes!!!

92: Favorite movie: a taiwanese movie called Secret, i rly liked ksoo’s movie Hyung, Chicago the Musical... there are more but im drawing a blank

i guess ill tag... no one but if ur reading this and u wanna do it feel free to say i tagged u! i love learning about u guys it makes me feel less alone