#here we are with a new episode and first thing I do is completely disconnected from it lmao

[ratstuckinamarble]

Who from the tadc cast would be most likely to help you hide a body?

Things to assume: this is a world in which such a thing could actually occur, you did it out of self defense, the characters view you as a friend. Also this is just for fun it's not that deep.

Jax: 50/50 chance. He might decline just to see you suffer some more with the panic of the situation, or he'd accept because that's the kinda thing he'd find entertaining. Either way he's only thinking about what he'll gain from the situation. Wouldn't be beyond ratting you out after blackmailing you, or just because he's bored.

Gangle: Yeah no. That's not happening. She wouldn't judge you but she wouldn't be in any condition to help either. Unless this is just like the plot of something she loves, then she's giddy and living in her own little movie.

Kinger: If he were in his right mind he'd try to figure out what happened and comfort you. Chances are he's not though, so no.

Zooble: They're down, not really phased, either. Might even be like "don't worry man, I've been there". Will absolutely not tell you what happened though.

Ragatha: She'd be really split on the whole thing. She'll ultimately help you and try to make you feel better but the experience will weigh on her, and you'll feel hella guilty if you realise.

Pomni: Depends. If she's able to keep a clear mind and not panic about the whole thing she'd probably agree, or at the very least try to help you figure out how to proceed. If she gets overwhelmed and too scared she might get in trouble, you're just gonna have to leave her be. Won't rat you out though.

Caine: He will not understand why you need his help. Might even tell people, and not get what the issue with that is. This man is only thinking about himself, but not maliciously so. You might be able to bribe him with compliments though.

Bubble: Yes. But you might regret it.

(If you disagree with any of these feel so free to drop your own headcanons but please be respectful about it, I did not think particularly deeply about all this)

[bengiyo]

Ben's Big BL Blurb 4: I Hope I See Jay Sorathon Again

New year, new blurb. Time to reflect on a few shows finishing, talk about some new shows, and see where we're at in January.

Haunted Hearts Sucked

Final Verdict: 5.5, Not Recommended. Y'all don't need to watch this weird mess of a show. Despite joking about "devirginizing" its lead multiple times, it was so chaste in the end. It also did some weird world shenanigans I was not feeling. The leads are supposed to be in another Oxin Films project soon, so we'll see if they're better there.

Caged Again Flopped

Final Verdict: 6, Recommended Only For Jay Sorathon. This one really hurts me, because I genuinely loved the first half of this show. Jay Sorathon as Junior was one of the most refreshing experiences I've had in a while. This young actor is charming in a way that felt different, and I found myself enjoying every scene he was in because he could deliver what he was asked to do. However, the show generally failed to do much with most of its themes, and I think it was a real waste of Nokia and Jaonine as a pair. There were interesting themes about how Junior and Sun wanted different things out of their relationship that didn't get resolved, so all of their skinship felt disconnected from the big themes they were teasing out.

I am sad that I cannot really recommend this as a complete viewing experience, but I do not want that to detract from how much I enjoyed the entire cast's chemistry. I just cannot pretend that this show didn't peak at the gif used above before floundering completely.

An Apology to City of Stars

Final Verdict: 8, Recommended. I skipped this show originally because I was overloaded and unmoved by the first episode. However, this show was actually one of the most consistent narratives we've had about the consequences of fan culture, sponsorship, and commercialization of queer actors we've had this year. Unlike Only Boo!, this show inflicted real consequences on Feuang for coming out to the point that he essentially had to change careers (which happens to real actors all the time, going back as far or further than William Haines).

The leads also kept having sex after getting together! A novel experience! I loved that Krom had almost no swag, and Feuang fell for him entire on family photos and his mom gushing over him. He really won as a tech worker. Watch this if you're interested in seeing a show with clear ideas about the entertainment industry and are willing to deal with some weak acting.

Our Youth Left Me A Bit Wanting

Final Verdict 8: Recommended With Reservations. I wrote my write up for this already, and will say here that I like parts of this show a lot even though I wasn't fully satisfied by the viewing experience.

See Your Love Got All The Important Things Right

Final Verdict: 8, Recommended for the Mains. I will admit that I didn't much care for the side couple, but I loved Shaopeng and Sean's relationship. I loved that this wasn't a story about fixing someone's hearing so they could be in a romance. I also love that one of our final scenes in Shaopeng's dad telling Sean's dad to go fuck himself. The leads reminded me of Jimmy and Tommy from Why R U and I loved their work together.

Love in the Air Koi Was a Genuine Delight

Final Verdict: 9, Highly Recommended. I liked it a lot. I think new and old fans will be able to enjoy it. I have high hopes about cross-cultural adaptations as a result.

Love is Like a Poison Was Spectacular

Final Verdict: 9.5, Highly Recommended. I had so much fun with this show. I love that this show blended multiple genres together, and I loved that Shiba was always in a legal drama. By blending this together this way, the show supports the idea that the different ways we love and see the world are not incompatible in relationships. Shiba and Haruto are one of the best couples we had this past year, because they each made the other better, and they each add something to their relationship. Also, this show was actively horny the entire time. Run, do not walk, to support this show (if you can) on Netflix.

Fragrance You Inherit Was The One of the Kindest Shows I've Ever Seen

Final Verdict: 9.5, Highly Recommended. Thanks to the constant efforts of @isaksbestpillow we were able to enjoy this incredible show. @twig-tea already wrote a great review. I will be thinking about Sakura and Touki for years. I will just add that I really loved that Hoshii was just a goofy dude that loved the women in his home. He respected both of them, and was just so happy to be included in their shenanigans. I cannot overstate how much the episode where we met him properly kicked this show into overdrive for me. I loved that he was a good dad and husband and that it was clear his wife and daughter felt safe and happy around him. I loved that this show was about kind people doing their best.

Okay, on to the currently airing stuff.

Your Sky is Faltering, but I Still Like It (8/12)

Look, I am just not keen on the Oh redemption arc. I'm also feeling the show dragging its feet at this point. I also am not sure what the relationship between the various sides are contributing to this story. That being said, I continue to enjoy the chemistry between the leads, and I am looking forward to seeing their dating era. This show has been riding the line on the bubble, and I am curious to see where it lands.

Ossan's Love Thailand (1/12)

I've grown to love Ossan's Love over the last year, and so I was cautiously optimistic about this adaptation. I don't think the humor is as tight or zippy as I would expect, and I think the branded pair component is hurting some of the initial setup. I also feel like the shower scene shifted in a way that doesn't entirely work. In addition, making Kongdetch a widower slows down his dramatic development. I'll check in again next month.

Call Me By No Name Started Weird (1/8)

gif by @my-rose-tinted-glasses

This show got off to a moody and somewhat intriguing start. I am looking forward to our little gamer's interactions with this possibly-fey creature for the coming weeks. It's difficult when the show starts coy.

When It Rains It Pours Has an Uphill Battle (1/7)

I am personally interested in the journey this show wants to go on as what will more than likely be a double cheating narrative. I like that the show started with boy guys in relationships they feel a bit frustrated with due to a lack of intimacy that is being actively ignored by their respective partners. I'm also intrigued because both partners seem like they're overall committed to our leads. This one started off in a mild note, so I'm curious how it holds audience attention. Still, both leads had sad masturbation scenes, one explicitly remembering when his partner used to fuck him, so it has my attention.

That's all for now! I'll check back in with one of these in a few weeks and we'll see where we're at.

[sunderwight]

Not to theorize on Arcane with only three episodes left to go or anything, but I do think that there's a reason why the scenes we get of Viktor where he's actually acting like his old self, with Sky also acting reasonably human, are in some kind of theater of the mind/magical space/etc, rather than just Viktor in-person talking to Hallucination Sky in his shimmer dome or something.

Like, think about it. The first few scenes we have of Viktor post-cocoon, he sees Sky as a hallucination in physical reality, and it's disjointed and an obvious sign that something has gone Wrong. It's creepy, and weird. He's got one foot in physical reality and one somewhere else (and it's styled very differently from Jinx's hallucinations, too, which handily indicates that this is not the same sort of thing).

But then, after Jayce returns and we see that Viktor has established his cult, his personality seems to be entirely contained within this otherworldly space. He can perceive reality, but it's no longer overlapping. He has become somewhat quarantined from himself, with Sky there as well, acting way more like "herself" than she did as a hallucination before but also essentially chaperoning Viktor's consciousness. Like a golden retriever put in with a zoo cheetah to keep it calm.

What's interesting is that, internal Viktor is pretty much the usual Viktor he's been since S1, more or less. Like, that's definitely Viktor, who worries about Jayce and focuses on complex problems and wants to help people. But in-person Viktor is weirder. He's not a completely different guy by any means, but he doesn't emote the way that the internal Viktor does, and he says more weird shit in weird tones. Based on the decisions he ultimately makes, I think the internal Viktor is still calling the shots -- but I also think that he's increasingly on his way out.

He's been disconnected from his own physical reality by several degrees, observing it more than interacting with it. And though he sees that there's another influence on Jayce, there are heavy hints (such as Sky appearing right when he says that) that he's in the same boat. But because the process is happening gradually, and is happening within him, he can't recognize it. Every time he tries to, he is presented with a new distraction, or discussion, or there is a reassuring concession that seems to validate that he's still in control. Plus it's probably just difficult to perceive because it does seem to be basing a lot of its outlook on things off of his own. How do you discern the "wrongness" in something when it's the same flavor of wrong that you yourself tend to be?

It's difficult from the outside to definitively say whether this is just Viktor undergoing some funky character development, or if Viktor's another victim of something else. Maybe Viktor's just sequestering his own humanity a bit? Maybe it's all just intended to depict how he navigates through magical energy?

But I think another big indication that it's not just Viktor, is Salo. When Jayce comes back and asks if Salo's still in there after Viktor talks through him, Salo just calmly reasserts himself, and acts as if the idea that he's being forcefully subjugated is absurd. He's not being attacked or imprisoned, he's just engaged in a willing partnership with a benevolent power. If we didn't know what he was like before, or if the old Salo had been a very calm and altruistic individual to being with, it might even be convincing. But the disconnect is way more obvious here because the character we met in past episodes is way further removed from the serene cultist we see Jayce smash with his big hammer. We know that even a grateful Salo is not the kind of person who is going to put on a beige tunic, forgo his many vices and fancy parties, and join a commune just to thank his benefactor. No matter how happy he was to have his legs back, it would only be because it got him his life back -- he wouldn't want to regain his mobility just to up and abandon that life.

Outwardly it would seem that the thing that has subverted Salo's will is Viktor. But if Viktor is also being gradually quarantined, if the same thing is happening to him, then that further implies that another will is at play. One that is disguising itself as Viktor, or if you will as an evolution of Viktor.

Okay and now to actually theorized I guess -- I think that this might be where Singed's assertions about Warwick/Vander being a necessary component of Viktor's evolution will come into play. Because Viktor himself is not going to sacrifice a man to achieve that, but whatever else is part of Viktor does want to evolve. And then it just so happens that Jayce comes out of nowhere, ostensibly being controlled or influenced by something else, and shoots Viktor dead. At which point it seems like the human part of Viktor goes out, and the Machine Evolution guy fully supplants him.

Yeah, I kind of think that Jayce did do a bad thing, but that the twist will be that when he touched the arcane, "Viktor" showed him a vision or gave him some kind of time travel-y experience that convinced him he had to go back and destroy him, so that Jayce would unwittingly kill the only thing holding it back before Viktor finished helping Vander, probably ran out of juice and died in the process, and quietly took this thing out with him. It would, unfortunately, be very on-brand for Jayce to take a decisive and violent action to try and prevent catastrophe, only to unintentionally make it worse. This show on the whole has stuck to the idea that shooting your big flashy magic weapon at a thing is a great way to make a complicated problem much much worse.

I'm not sure they'd break the pattern for this one.

[h-worksrambles]

Ok, so Episode Aigis dropped, they changed some dialogue and now people are pissed and saying P3 Reload ruined The Answer.

If you want my TLDR, Atlus’ changes (both writing and mechanical) for the DLC are overall small, some good some bad, but they’re ultimately band aids that fail to address the much wider flaws of The Answer as a story.

I think there’s a genuine intent to try and better get across the character’s motivations. And for some characters it works well. I think the new dialogue for Mitsuru is a genuine improvement. I’ve seen some criticise it for focusing more on Mituru’s thoughts towards the protagonist then her (rather queer coded) loyalty to Yukari. But as much as I love my SEES lesbians, I genuinely think giving Mitsuru multiple reasons to side with Yukari rather than just blind loyalty, is much more in character for her than FES’ approach (where she comes across uncharacteristically stupid). But I think by only changing minutia like this it just ends up highlighting the bigger problem.

A lot of people hyper focus on Yukari’s role and talk about how irrational she is here. And now you’ve got people complaining that Reload softens and sanitises her character and makes her storyline weaker. But I feel it’s a case of identifying something doesn’t work but being incorrect as to why.

The thing about the SEES group fight is that it’s fundamentally a really poorly done conflict. It sucked in FES and it sucks here too. There’s not enough meaningful disagreement between the group to make it feel earned. The only one acting out and taking the MC’s death badly, is Yukari. When really if this is the climax they wanted to build to, everyone should have been grieving badly and constantly at each other’s throats. It could have been this building frustration and animosity, until they’re all at odds over what to do with the key and a fight breaks out.

What we get is everyone…mostly being pretty chill, aside from Yukari being kind of petty and jealous at Aigis. And I think the reason people react badly to her (misogyny notwithstanding) is that it’s really weird when she’s the only one having this extreme reaction. Instead of everyone dealing with the MCs death in their own distinct way, it’s only explored with Aigis and Yukari and only somewhat. Hell if you didn’t have such a jarring disconnect, and there was a better variety of reactions and thoughts from across the cast, I think more people would praise Yukari’s writing here. As it stands, when everyone else is almost ridiculously reasonable, it looks very jarring.

And then when the group do fight it feels completely out of nowhere precisely because of how agreeable everyone’s been. Everyone willingly jumps into a pointless fight that could get them all killed, one that only one member of the group even wants. All for a very contrived plot point that was set up five minutes ago. It’s executed in such a sloppy way that it makes the genuinely good scene of Yukari’s breakdown ring hollow. You get the sense that the writers weren’t really interested in exploring Yukari’s grief beyond using it as a plot device to make a dumb, unnecessary punch up scene happen.

I can see what they’re trying to do in Reload. They wanted to make Yukari stick out like less of a sore thumb compared to the rest of the group. But if they were gonna do that, they kinda needed to dial everyone else up, not dial her down. Build the tension between the party further rather than decrease it. Because now, if Yukari, and by extension the rest of the party are way more reasonable, it just begs the question even more of ‘they why are you fighting in the first place?’ It’s slapping on a band aid in a way that just exposes the whole scenario’s weaknesses

I genuinely think Episode Aigis needed to either keep the Answer entirely as is, or overhaul it completely. Making little changes like this won’t win over people who hated The Answer the first time, and will just annoy people who liked it as is. As it stands, The Answer is still a mess of good ideas mired by poor execution and Reload’s take only makes a handful of small changes that are ultimately different, not better.

[spammreviews]

Pantheon Season Two Review:

AAHHHHHH!!! I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH. IT HAS EVERYTHING I WANT OUT OF SCI-FI. AHHHHH!!!

A minor complaint I have is that the animation is occasionally a bit odd. There are a few moments when CGI is used, and it sticks out like a sore thumb. Also, the animation would sometimes get oddly smooth for two seconds. In addition, there were moments when it felt like different characters were in different art-styles, and that was a bit confusing.

However, these were just minor moments.

My only real complaint here is that the plot often feels forced. It relies a lot on contrivances, like Maddie’s mom just letting Maddie go off on her own in DC, Mist randomly coming into existence at the most opportune moment, and Caspian’s fake dad randomly coming in to save the day also at an opportune moment. Lots of things show up very conveniently, like the swarm. It’s supposed to show up when there is a big spike in UI energy, but there’s half a dozen scenes where a lot of energy is used and it doesn’t show up. That’s a nitpick, but I thought I’d mention it. 

In addition, the story really likes introducing new concepts that previously had little foreshadowing like Holstrom’s brain being preserved, their being a bagillion other UIs, and once again, Mist. The virus thing also came out of nowhere. 

It doesn’t help that the plot of this season is constantly changing directions. We get two episodes all about bringing Maddie’s dad back, only for that to be a very minor thing. Then, the plot is all about stopping Holstrom, despite that feeling pretty disconnected with the first hour and a half of TV we’ve previously seen. 

However, I don’t really care, as the story knocks it out of the park when it comes to its characters and concepts.

Maddie is such a great character. Firstly, the animators did a fantastic job with her expressions. She always looks so sad, and I just want to give her a big hug. Also, props to actress Katie Chang, as I really like the way a lot of Maddie’s lines are whispered in a very meek voice.

Both of these connect to what I think makes Maddie work so well: she’s just a kid. This season really highlights how much she’s just a grieving child who is in over her head. I love that part where she reunites with her mom and gets all embarrassed about being hugged. It’s such a teenager thing to do.

While I complained about the odd shift of the season suddenly becoming about Holstrom in its third episode, I think we needed those first two episodes to really show where Maddie’s head space is. The scene where she’s chased by that conspiracy weirdo was a great way or showing that she is not a fighter, and she’s someone who is going to be overpowered by adults. Throughout the rest of the season, when put it similar situations, Maddie has a really realistic reaction. There’s no moments of her beating anyone up.

In addition, Pantheon’s portrayal of grief is incredibly realistic. Maddie knows grieving works, she knows she needs to move on, but she’s still struggling. In a lot of ways, we see Maddie making the right moves. She does talk about her feelings, she does find new activities, she does accept the reality of her situation, but she still makes the decision to go to Norway. In addition, this grief never goes away. Whenever David Kim is brought up, we see Maddie have to take a moment. 

I also liked Maddie’s reaction to Mist existing because of how immature it is. Apparently, a lot of kids do get this feeling of jealousy when a new sibling enters their life- and it’s really interesting to see this play out in such a unique way. It’s also neat to see Maddie slowly bonding with Mist over the course of a few episodes. 

So, yes, Maddie is fantastic, but so is Caspian. He’s just really entertaining to watch. That scene where he has a gun pointed at him and is just completely nonplussed is both very funny and very sad. His constant depression makes him sympathetic and also really endearing. There’s a very clear EVA influence on the show, and in that way, Caspian is basically a male REI, and I find that charming. 

Caspian’s plot is really focused on him struggling to reckon with being a clone, and I like that the show doesn’t just have him being completely okay with it after his arc in season one. It understands that something this existentially horrific isn’t something that is easily reckoned with. I also appreciated that he doesn’t instantly forgive his fake dad- as that also feels really realistic. 

Another big idea is Caspian having to get along with others. When we’re re-introduced to him in the first episode, he’s being really prickly to everyone, but Maddie manages to drag him out of it because she’s the only one actually honest to him, giving him this whole speech. Caspian was in a situation where no one was honest with him, so he really had no one to talk to, but Maddie gave him that. In addition, he is forced into situations where he has to become a better people person. A good example of this is the episode with Joey, where he has to communicate with someone who is being very antagonistic with him. The show doesn’t draw attention to it, but it’s there.

Plus, Caspian has to serve as a shoulder for Maddie to lean on. A really moving scene is when Caspian gives a pep talk to Maddie after she watches her father die for the gajillionth time. It’s like him returning the favor of her previously giving him emotional support before, and it shows that he has actually taken her advice to heart.

Also, Holstrom sort of represents all of the assholery within Caspian, and Caspian fighting Homstrolm is him sort of fighting his own inner demons. Holstrom literally takes the appearance of Caspian during the fight. All of the comparisons between Caspian and Holstrom throughout the season are neat, like when we see Caspian say that he has this grand purpose in the Joey episode, and then Holstrom says something very similar two episodes later. 

Their relationship is also cute in how mature both characters are about it, particularity in that one scene where Caspian says he wish he met Maddie at a different time. 

It is nice to have the main characters be my favorite characters. The side cast are also given stuff to do. 

In particular, I like all the UIs we meet, as it feels like each of them have their own complexities while also serving to move Caspian and Maddie’s arcs forward. As I previously said, Caspian has to deal with Joey being antagonistic, but there’s also the way Olivia and Farhad show Caspian and Maddie that reaching out to others is necessary. Maddie is forced to give a pep talk to Farhad guy about how his dead GF wouldn’t want him to just wallow in his misery, and it’s clear that she’s also telling this to her herself. Then, the Israeli guy’s story is all about how memory defines us, as the Israeli guy has to confront his old memories to save himself. It sort of proves to Caspian that he is more than Holstrom because of the way his different memories define him. Caspian has this line about how you can’t “cut out your core”, and it’s another instance where its clear that Caspian is talking about himself.

I think that’s neat. 

I also didn’t expect the Israeli guy to go through a complete character arc in about fifteen minutes of screen time. 

Meanwhile, Ellen’s arc in this season is maybe my least favorites. It’s about her having to rise to the occasion, I guess. It’s not given a huge amount of time, and to be honest, she’s a pretty basic character. However, it’s not like I was bored or anything. She’s still likable, and she played off the Waxman fella well. I appreciate how much of her story revolves around her talking about David, as it means that she’s having to confront her past- similar to what many of these other characters are doing. It’s almost like it’s a theme. 

In addition, Holstrom makes for a decent big bad in that he has enough personality, and the show does a good job of showing how much of a threat he is.

Chanda also has a surprisingly developed story for someone with so little screen-time, as he’s forced to realize that maybe his whole Magneto thing is pretty dumb. The show was smart to throw in a scene of him and the old guy bonding, as it means that Holstrom’s killing of Chanda really felt like a betrayal. It meant that Chanda turning on Holstrom felt earned. 

Penultimately, there’s Caspian’s fake mom who’s name I forgot. She’s an interesting character, but it feels like she’s stretched a bit too thin. We get a bunch of short scenes with just her sprinkled throughout this season. It feels like they’re not one hundred percent necessary. Seeing her poison the vaccines isn’t something we really needed to see.

Lastly, Mist is cute. She provides an interesting way for Maddie to work out her grief. The heartbreak Maddie experienced over losing her Dad multiple times means she’s hesitant to let someone else into her life, especially someone who is connected to her Dad and is also technology. The show isn’t exactly consistent with describing what her powers are, but oh well. 

In terms of concepts, the show’s political ideas can be a bit on-the-nose, in my opinion. We get a Fox news parody called FNX with the most obvious Tucker Carlson parody. The inclusion of the virus also made me groan a bit, as I’m sick of hearing about viruses, and it weirdly plays into vaccine conspiracy theories. 

However, outside of that, I enjoyed the political ideas. I like that the show becomes about who watches the watchers. Caspian wants to create a sort of benevolent dictator, a UI who can police all of the other UIs, only to find that impossible. Everyone he meets is imperfect. The UIs are extremely powerful entities, and it seems like there’s no easy way to fix this issue. 

In addition, the show managed to comment on Covid in a more subtle manner, as the internet shutdown is very similar to the lockdowns. Maddie has a line where she says “Everyone keeps thinking the world is going back to normal, but it’s not”.

Also, it’s a bit insane to see a show actually bring up the Israel-Palestine conflict. It’s not a major part of the season, but it ties in with the themes about war going throughout. The show isn’t subtle about how we all need to get together, as everyone from different countries needs to work together to stop Holstrom. It’s unsubtle, but oh well. It’s also nice that this issue of being stronger together is present on both the personal and political level. 

My take away from all of this is that the show definitely does a good job at actually baking the themes into the plot. The cure being other’s code was a very eloquent way of doing that. 

Lastly, let’s move away from story to everything else. I complained about the animation, but, other than those odd few moments, this thing looks gorgeous. I love the way everything glows. There’s a yellow-ish shine to a lot of scenes in this season that I love. The show is very colorful overall, I like how a lot of the character’s hair has subtle pigments to it, with Maddie having purple-ish hair while Caspian’s is red.

Also, and this goes without saying, but of course the fight scenes kick all of the ass in the world- as they’re really creative. The fight scene of Holstrom versus Chandra and co is absolutely insane. 

Plus, the voice acting here is all very nice. I kept forgetting that Caspian was Paul Dano, he really fits into the role like a glove. Also, William Hurt’s mumbly delivery of Holstrom is perfect.

Well, that’s it for this wonderful six episode season. I have a few nitpicks, to be sure, but nitpicks are nitpicks, and they don’t get in the way of what the show is saying. Without a doubt, this is-

Oh, yeah, the last two episodes. 

So, here’s the thing. I am 90% sure the last two episodes were originally going to be their own season, but then the studio said the show would end at season two. That makes sense, as I feel like all of my problems with these two episodes would go away if the show had more time.

The thing about time skips is that that a lot of time has to be spent re-introducing us to the world and the characters. So, we need to spend thirty or so minutes on that. We get multiple montages and about twenty or so exposition dumps. It doesn’t help that we get A LOT of ideas thrown at us: time shenanigans, space elevators, robotic bodies, a bunch of other stuff. If the show had an entire season, this massive pummeling of exposition could have been done a lot slower, giving us time to breathe.

In addition, the character of David Kim II, Caspian and Maddie’s son, is really underdeveloped because he gets about five minutes of screen time. In fact, this whole future world feels underdeveloped because I barely see it.

I also feel like the show doesn’t have enough time to explain its thoughts.  The idea behind UIs is that they’re like nuclear bombs who are also people. They’re extremely dangerous, possibly too dangerous too exist, but they are also people and therefore deserving of rights. Much of the show’s conflicts are based upon this paradox- one with no easy answer. Then, these last two episodes kinda give us an easy answer by showing that UIs could just agree to not hurt humans. The only real problems in the two episodes stem from the failings of humans, not the UIs.

In addition, the the rest of the show treats becoming a UI as something completely bad. That makes sense. Becoming a UI means you basically lose all privacy and are at risk of becoming a tool for some company. Also, you know, you sort of lose your humanity. However, these last two episodes make it seem like there’s no real debate, and that becoming a UI is awesome, actually. 

I’m sure this wasn’t intentional, but it’s difficult to get your ideas straight when you only have so much time.

Also, why did David Kim the Elder need to be brought back? What was the point of that? Really, the whole last two episodes make everything seem pretty consequence-free. There’s brutality, sure, but it’s kind of swept under the rug. All of the people horrifically murdered by robots are quickly forgotten about- unless maybe future Maddie also stopped that from happening, I’m not sure.

Also also, the part about the indigenous site in Ecuador was bizarre, as it seemed to accidentally suggest that destroying Native American sites is fine. That’s weird.

However, all of that being said, I do think Maddie and Caspian got a great ending. 

Caspian has been struggling with the idea that he’a a tool, with his desire to remove himself from people, and this sort of death wish that he is. Caspian also has this idea that he needs to shoulder all this burden on himself, and that leads him to constantly isolate himself from others. In the end, he learns to let these ideas go in his finale speech to the anti-viral. This allows him to have a sort of immortality in the minds of the anti-viral’s ancestors (I think that’s what they were, or maybe they were CIs, IDK), thereby rewarding him for going through this arc. 

Maddie also has to learn to live with herself, and she’s also rewarded for this by eventually getting to be with Caspian. Despite the time skip, Maddie’s arc continues really smoothly through the last two episodes. Her not wanting David II to go to the cloud is similar to her not wanting to let Caspian go and not wanting to let her dad go in season one. The line about her thinking that immortality means endless pain is a really moving one, as it feels like it sums up her character really well. She’s afraid of pain, and that fear drives all of her actions. 

The ending sees both of Maddie and Caspian accepting the pain of existence and the real world, which is very Evangelion-esque. In addition, the ending is cyclical, which I love.

The thing is…it kinda feels like every other character got shafted. Waxman and Ellen have nothing to do in these last two episodes, and Mist gets a thing about loving Caspian that doesn’t really go anywhere. Also, Caspian’s fake mom gets killed unceremoniously, so what was the point of her? Also, what happened to the Israeli guy and the Iranian guy? Also, what about Maddie’s friend, the blonde one with the chickens? And what happened to Caspian’s dad? What happened to Josephine?

I keep coming across stories that would be amazing if they weren’t so rushed.

Having the last two episodes of your show take place in a completely different setting with a completely different conflict from the rest of the show is a big gamble, and I don’t think it pays off. 

Still, it looked cool, and I do think the show succeeded in giving Caspian and Maddie their proper send offs. 

All in all, season two of Pantheon is like eating a really delicious dinner and then the desert is a bunch of cantaloupe. I enjoyed my experience, but I left feeling kinda confused. This isn’t to say that cantaloupe is bad, I just don’t want it for desert, just like how I don’t loathe the last two episodes, I just think they should have been a whole season. 

[sneakydraws]

i wanna see fifty five goldfinch pieces 💔💔

OKAY!! So I have this little series I like to call the great decompartmentalisation of Theo decker... Let me walk you through it. I promise there's art after the massive paragraph of meandering analysis alright

You know how Theo's life is segmented into these distinct episodes? And how he himself is split into multiple different identities, and how much shame and fear there is associated with the idea of those identities mixing? For example: the straight a student living a completely, delusionally idyllic life with his adoring mother and the vanilla teenage troublemaker breaking into people's summer homes with his shady homoerotic bestie. When the two identities come into contact via his suspension, it leads to the most traumatic event in Theo's life, and honestly I suspect that might be the origin of this tendency towards compartmentalisation... I could go through the whole book here but the most prominent examples are Theo panicking at the thought of Mrs Barbour or his therapist finding out about Hobie, his cutting himself off from New York when in Vegas with his other shady homoerotic bestie (the amount of times Vegas is compared to an alien planet...) and his dual post timeskip identifies of charming antiques salesman/fraudulent art stealing junkie. And this often manifests in Theo's reluctance to let people from his different periods interact - see him rushing to stop Boris from talking to Pippa, and him keeping Hobie in the dark about the blackmail, and isn't it kind of weird that the barbours - Theo's soon to be legal family - don't really interact with Hobie and Pippa? Anyway. Basically I thought it would be cool to make a series of little vignettes of theo allowing the people and places and things that represent various versions of Him to interact and thus symbolically healing the disconnected parts of himself... Or something. I have more ideas scribbled down but somehow the only ones I ended up with proper art for is the various holidays (which, holidays are also a weirdly prevalent theme in tgf? Idk whats up with that but it's a good tool for this purpose) so we have:

Christmas Eve at Boris's, featuring Pippa and Hobie - I feel kinda bad for only ever portraying Boris with polish customs but let's be real I'm just using him to show off my own heritage lol. In Poland the main Xmas celebrations happen on Xmas Eve, traditionally with the appearance of the first star in the sky. You eat the mostly inoffensive barszcz as well some truly vile shit, such as mushroom and cabbage dumplings, mushroom and cabbage salad, other items made of mushrooms and cabbage, and finally the most disgusting dish of my life: Jewish style carp. No, it's not quite the same thing as gefiltefish, although that's the Wikipedia page you might use to get to the actual dish. All washed down with compote which I hate. You also break and eat communion wafers while wishing each other stuff, which Pippa is doing with popchyk here hehe

Christmas breakfast as a little bonus despite it not having much of a tradition - I associate it with lots of hams/cured meats, gherkins and maybe Tatar sauce (yum). Much superior to the Xmas dinner imho. Really I just wanted Theo and Boris to have a moment to themselves haha

Christmas proper at the barbours, featuring Boris and Tom cable! I could talk about all the tension and who's diffusing it but honestly I think y'all can draw your own conclusions lol. I just think it would be really funny for the infamous dis-engaged couple to each bring their delinquent boytoys and for Boris the drug dealer to actually come out looking superior

Vegetarian friendly Thanksgiving at Hobie's, as tradition requires! I think he'd love to throw one of his big Thanksgiving parties purely for all of Theo's families to get to know each other... you know, kind of an elaboration on that Thanksgiving illustration I drew a while back! This would be before all the Christmases I think. Boris is winning Mrs Barbour over with his roguish charm lol I think old ladies would like him... Theo in the corner freaking the hell out as per this project's mission statement lmao

And on a slightly different note I wanted Theo Pippa and Hobie to all visit weltys grave. I'm borrowing slightly from the polish tradition of all saint's day, when you clean, decorate and light candles on the graves of loved ones.

[being-of-rain]

Okay, time to write my thoughts on Empire of Death. Like the rest of the season, I've only watched it once so far. I think soon I'll binge all of Fourteen and Fifteen soon. And as with many of the episodes, I'll be interested to see what I think of the finale on a rewatch. Anyway, this post gets a little long-winded, and I hope readers will forgive me for feeling my way around my opinions on the episode as I go.

I've already said that I wasn't a big fan of the episode. But part of me thinks that Empire of Death is a very subjective one. People I've seen defending it have said that critics aren't engaging enough with the themes, and are being too nitpicky. That sounds familiar, because I know I've held opinions along those lines on other controversial Dr Who episodes. So in that case, what you think of the episode is going to depend on how you connect to the themes, and to the emotions. How much do you think the themes and emotions earn priority over other aspects of the story and how its judged?

Then again, I suppose I might be contradicting that when I say that there's some themes I liked in the episode, but (like in The Giggle,) I really didn't like how the episode executed them. The idea of Ruby's mum being an ordinary woman is something I like in theory and am not surprised by; celebrating the ordinary in the midst of the extraordinary is a signature move of New Who and has been the twist conclusion for quite a few story arcs already. But while it's done as explicitly here as it ever has been, the plot doesn't really manage to support it.

I'm sure I don't have to list a lot of the questions and nitpicks fans (including me) have here, but even the catch-all explanations of 'a god was interested in the mystery' and 'magic is in Dr Who now' don't feel like they really work for me. For the first because it feels out of character and contrived that Sutekh cares about this mystery at all, and if he does then why only this one? And for the second, well its unclear how or even if the magic unleashed in the 60th specials affect this finale at all, since Sutekh seems to have completely different origins to the other two gods (and if it does have bearing on this episode then that isn't made clear at all). You could say this is me getting hung up on nitpicks and details, and I really do hate letting those things get in the way of a story... but it's hard not to when those details are such a large part of the story. I don't quite agree with the harsh criticism of RTD taking advantage of the viewers or whatever (which I think has been said about every showrunner), but this arc/s and final two episodes are so geared towards speculation and building up questions in spectacular ways that brushing over them with not much of an answer feels... well, like a plot hole.

As a result, statements like 'this ordinary woman is so important because of what we thought of her' and 'time is memory and memory is time', while really lovely sentiments, and themes I'd love to see explored, only really make sense if disconnected from the rest of the story. To come back to my first paragraph, they're themes that you have to give so much priority to over the rest of the story that they basically become premises that need to be accepted in order to carry the plot, rather than the other way around.

Does any of this make sense? I think all this was to say: for me this story definitely doesn't earn the 'themes are good enough to ignore the details' approach, even though I love the themes. Never mind, that summary made even less sense.

Another criticism I had of The Giggle, and pretty much all of RTD's finales, is that RTD really wants to go for big emotional moments and let the emotions carry the plot... but the emotions just don't always hit for me, especially when it doesn't feel like the story's earned it. That feels like more of a problem in Empire of Death than ever before.

Maybe the scene with the biggest emotional impact on me (not a massive impact, but bigger than the rest of the episode) was the scene with the lady giving the Doctor the spoon, possibly because it felt so strangely divorced from the rest of the episode, like a scene from a different episode dropped in the middle.

Ruby's departure was... well for one, unexpected. I know she's in the next season, right? Is it a series 4 Martha come-back-as-a-guest-star situation, or a series 9 Clara the-departure-was-a-fakeout situation? Anyway, the departure was... about as satisfying as I've found Ruby's character arc. I really had hoped that her only important defining character trait wasn't 'orphan who wants to meet her bio mum,' but its hard not to think of her that way after this episode. I never really found anything to hook me on the character. Shame.

I'm going to sound like a broken record here, but I can't help but compare Ruby's arc to Izzy Sinclair's arc from the DWM comics. On an obvious level, Ruby's arc concludes with her successfully tracking down her bio mum while Izzy's arc concludes with her happily returning to her adoptive parents, no longer considering her 'secret origins' as a missing part of herself. And while I definitely prefer the sentiment of Izzy's story, I don't want to say Ruby uncovering her origins and gaining a new parent automatically makes for a bad ending to an adoptee's story. But I think just as important is that with Izzy, we really dive into why she feels the way she does. We learn in great detail how her feelings about being adopted connect to many other things in her life, not least her self image. In comparison, Ruby feels downright shallow. She's incredibly curious who her mother is, considering it part of her legend... and that's about it. It doesn't really affect her in any way most episodes. Maybe I'm being unfair here and I'd be less harsh after my rewatch, we'll see.

Unfortunately the resolution to the Sutekh plot also didn't satisfy me. Dragging Sutekh back through the time vortex to 'bring death to death' just... doesn't work for me. Not even on a storybook level, or fairytale level, or purely emotion-based level. It felt... idk... childish?, in a way I really didn't vibe with. But honestly I would've been happy it happened if, when the Doctor started listing planets he was bringing back, he mentioned Gallifrey and revealed the Time Lords were alive again and then we could all just move on. Sigh.

I think that's most of the major points. What else do I have to say?

The oppressive empty atmosphere of Sutekh's dead universe was cool. There was a scene with just Sutekh and his minion where everything beside them was intensely silent, which really hammered the point home. It's still funny/silly to me that the so-called god of music wanted this exact same thing.

Mel is still lovely, and call me a nerd but her recognising Six's outfit and later cuddling with Seven's was maybe the best part of the episode for me. Apart from that she sure spent a lot of time standing around with no dialogue. I finally got an answer to the question I'd been asking since November last year- if there'd been a reason Mel in particular was brought back to the show- and the answer is Not Really. I did laugh when a friend pointed out that there's plot-important computer hacking in this episode and during that Mel was told to go keep watch in the corridor.

Meanwhile Kate felt like she was parodying herself by trying to recruit Susan at the end of the episode. Teens work for UNIT because Kate can't be around someone for five minutes without trying to headhunt them. I saw Kate and the random soldier hold hands at the end but read it as (or maybe very much hoped it was) platonic and relieved to be alive.

I don't think I truly knew how much the Vlinx annoyed me until it was killed by Sutekh, and for one short moment I was filled with joy at the belief it wouldn't be coming back. Sorry the Vlinx.

The TARDIS has a laser that can be activated with a whistle? Huh? Did I miss something or is that just a fact? The only thing I could think to connect it with was the 'heart-of-the-Tardis-laser-beam' from Flux, which would make it much stupider.

I'm pretty sure Mrs Flood will be a new character, but heck if I know. She doesn't seem like Susan anymore. Oh yeah! So I guess Susan wasn't in this apart from one second of archival footage. Unless next season uses this as foreshadowing, it feels like a waste.

And that's all I can remember after one viewing! I believe the next episode is a christmas special by Steven Moffat? I've decided I'm excited for it. I think Moffat christmas eps have more hits than misses, as opposed to RTD finales.

[eolewyn1010]

Reading Percy Jackson TLT was an ordeal for me 1 - Writing

Now, as a disclaimer in the name of fairness, I only ever read The Lightning Thief and none of the Percy Jackson series beyond that, so my experience with Rick Riordan's writing is limited (and I'm not planning to change that). It's also a distorted experience because I didn't read the original - I read a translated version, and I often noticed that it wasn't the best translation. For example, whoever was responsible was apparently incapable of translating an imperative mood, crippling quite a lot of dialogue. So I'll give Riordan that: I have probably not seen the best of his work.

That said, I massively disliked this book. Yes, even within the boundaries and rules of Kids' Fantasy. I won't tag this to the fandom because it seems nigh impossible to find anyone who so much as tolerates negative criticism of Percy Jackson. I've been called brain-damaged for not liking it, which is certainly a mature take. But I will feel better listing it all down that one time, getting it out of my mind, so here we go.

These dialogues are weird, these people are weird

I constantly catch myself thinking, "no one talks like that??" Even taking the translation aspect into account, a lot of the dialogue sounds just stilted. After the bus crash, some of the passengers are described by Percy as literally running in a circle yelling "We're gonna die" - no one behaves like that. It's a funny, over-the-top imagination that would fit in a cartoon, and it completely breaks with the serious tension of the preceding scene, and with my suspension of disbelief. People, even hysterical people, don't do that seriously. It feels like a scene in a theater play.

It appears equally forced when Annabeth apparently mutters to herself as she walks away from Percy: "Mission... Poseidon? ...[some cussing]... need a plan..." And I sit there like: Really? You mutter that to yourself? I can believe that you mutter a curse to yourself, but this "shreds of sentences" thing? Why would she talk to herself in the first place? So Percy can randomly hear some incomplete thoughts? No. It's to tease the readers. Riordan, you shouldn't make me aware of the author's presence all the time. Annabeth never talks to herself otherwise. It isn't even a character thing for her. And made out like this, it's so unnatural.

Same goes for Percy talking in his sleep... apparently very clearly and comprehensibly, so that Annabeth can piece together what he's been dreaming of. Except. People who talk in their sleep? They mumble. They hardly get a cohesive sentence out. How am I supposed to believe that this is playing in the real world? These people don't behave like people.

And one more thing that struck me as odd: A description of Grover with "his eyes narrowed; there was fear in them." Hm. Have you ever tried to look afraid with your eyes narrowed? It isn't actually that easy. When people are scared, their eyes widen. Tell me when you can narrow your eyes and get your expression not to look angry, not distrustful or doubtful, but afraid.

Is this plot ever going anywhere?

So, it's one thing that this structure of quest-hopping isn't how I personally like my books. A bigger problem seems to me that it's lacking coherence. Most of the kids' stops on the way and monsters to slay have nothing to do with their mission. Why is all of this so disconnected? Did we learn anything new from the Medusa adventure, from the episode with Echidna?

And at times, it feels like the plot is artificially prolonged. This is really bad in the beginning when no one can be arsed to tell Percy what the hell is going on. Neither Chiron nor know-it-all Annabeth can just give him a straight answer to anything. Which, Chiron comes off as plain gaslighting Percy at his human school when he denies that Percy just fought for his fucking life, and Annabeth? Percy even lampshades it; at one point he's like, "as if I was supposed to already know all that." Well, HOW IS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT WHEN NO ONE OPENS THEIR FUCKING MOUTH? And the one time that Annabeth actually wants to tell Percy something, she gets interrupted by a random outside occurence that isn't even important. Can anyone get this shit moving already?

The worst foreshadowing since Stephenie Meyer

I wish Riordan would stop slapping me over the head with Dead Herrings (aka Red Herrings that don't work the way they should). Telling me something very specific and then going "Nooo, it's couldn't possibly be that highly specific thing!" will not redirect my thoughts the wrong way; it will just make me wait jadedly for the moment when, oh, such surprise, it turns out it was exactly what you thought of first.

"Oh, Percy can do funny things with water and the only thing he's good at is rowing - who could possibly be his father!"

"This lady is surrounded by scared-looking statues and we can't see her eyes - who could she possibly be!"

"This statue looks like my uncle - what a weird coincidence!"

"Dude keeps telling Percy to put on the flying shoes - wonder what he's on about!"

Honestly, it feels very condescending. My friend said the book is written for 12-year-olds, but does Riordan know that 12-year-olds aren't idiots? It's not a good idea to treat your readers as being dense.

Inconsistent worldbuilding

Do we ever get a reason for Grover eating literal garbage? Oh, I know, the extra-diagetical explanation is a joke I'm not in on and that frankly enrages me (later more on that). But in-universe we are never told how he's capable of chewing tin cans without cutting himself to shreds. We're never told how he can digest that shit. If you have to make this a thing, Riordan, at least make it work!

Camp Half-Blood is... eh. Okay-ish? Riordan doesn't know the first thing about Ancient Greek architecture, and it comes back to bite him with Annabeth. But for now, I have questions about the strawberries. How are they growing so well when they never have rain over the valley? Like. Plants do need water. And there's no reason why Dionysus and his kids should be able to make them grow well, none. Dionysus isn't and has never been a god of nature, ever since he separated from Pan (and Pan IS a separate character in this book). The only plant he has a connection to is fucking grapevine. I can buy that he can make grapevines grow, but everything else should be under the jurisdiction of Demeter and her children. Who are allegedly largely unimpressive, but we'll get to that. Also. All strawberries? Nothing but strawberries, ever? Monoculture is ruining the soil, y'know. That camp should be on dead ground within a decade or so.

Then again, Percy also claims he hasn't eaten anything unhealthy ever since he entered the camp. And then counts, "grapes, bread, cheese, lean barbecued meat." No strawberries then? Anyway, my point is: This isn't healthy. It's a very reduced diet - a balanced diet for 12-year-olds, still growing and physically very active 12-year-olds, requires more than that! How do the kids in the camp not all have deficiency symptoms?

I'm not sure how the disappearing monsters work. Body parts can just randomly stay behind as the spoils of war? Who decides which parts? Riordan wanted Medusa's eyes to still do their work after Percy slays Medusa, because the eyes still working is part of the Perseus myth that he's processing, but that really doesn't roll with "the body just disappears when the creature is slain." Like, what. Why wouldn't her head just disappear with the rest of her; it's a part of her body? Can just the head disappear instead and randomly leave the body behind? What are the rules here?

And there's the bit with "does this actually play in the real world?" again. Because when they wander the forest, Grover complains that they cannot see the stars because of the pollution. Which. This red sheen over the sky shouldn't be a thing in the middle of a forest. This is not how light pollution works, unless they are close to a city, in which case, why are they sleeping in the forest? Or is Grover trying to tell me that there were no clouds before environmental pollution? (Granted, I don't know why they went into the forest in the first place and didn't just sleep at Medusa's shop...)

In a similar vein, why is the police looking after Percy as a criminal suspect and not as a missing child? When a 12-year-old disappears, who in their right mind goes, "he could have murdered his mother"?? Why isn't the reaction, "something really bad happened to them both; we need to look for them both!", but "we need to look specifically for this kid because he has definitely done something terrible to his mom"? What is that for an outlandish approach to a missing kid?

This is a Very American Perspective (and it doesn't work)

Now, telling me that the USA are the center of Western civilisation is obviously extremely subjective, and as a non-American, I'm probably not supposed to agree. That Chiron goes on to declare the nebulous future "fall of Western civilisation" this huge, apocalyptic catastrophe and in the process sounds like a whiny rightwing politican - okay, that's me being cynical. But this really fails as soon as the Olympus and the Greek gods get in on the equation. I cannot imagine any place in the world that's less into pagan polytheism than the USA. The Greek gods aren't revered there, or if they are, it's by very small groups.

So, if Riordan's train of thought is "they are revered by whatever name; they may have different names, but it's always the same gods", then we get into a real conundrum with the multitude of pantheons in various religions. Because the gods in different religions are very incongruent in what functions and personalities they have. It already fails with the Greek-to-Roman transference - close as these two mythologies may be, they don't work in 1:1 accordance (something which Riordan heavily misrepresents, but I'm not going into that here). So, if the modern USA are so central to Western civilisation that the gods moved the Olympus and the Underworld and everything there, how did the gods' personalities and powers not massively shift over the millennia; how did gods not disappear and appear and merge to fit more contemporary notions of God / gods? Are they completely unperturbed by mortal developments and mindsets? Then why would they ever change anything, including their location?

Speaking of Greek and Roman gods... I really enjoy the action scenes. Riordan is good at writing action; it's fun. So. It ires me that I got completely ripped out of the scene by Percy randomly spouting Latin curses. Why Latin? What does that have to do with his prodigious propensity to Ancient Greek? Why. Why does Riordan keep mixing up Roman with Greek mythology, one language with the other? They are very distinct!

Chiron at one point describes the cooperation of gods with mortals as "the dawn of the Western civilisation". This is funny, as Western civilisation hit a real low after the fall of the Roman Empire (and yes, I'm focussing on Europe in this part of my argument - there was no Western civilisation in America before the late 16th century). And it stayed like that throughout a large portion of the middle ages. The civilisation on a roll until about the 11th century was what we'd today sum up under "Arab". They were the big scientists, the big architects, they dominated the trade, they spread all over the place; it was a whole thing. Yet of course gods of Western civilisation cannot be worshipped in Fez, in Tunis, in Granada, in Baghdad, in Alexandria - so where were they in the meantime? How did they not disappear while Christianity became a thing? They were not being worshipped anymore; the majority of people alive in the Western world weren't aware there had ever been other religions in Europe than Christianity because translating the old texts into modern languages was something Arabian scholars did early on, but it was a late fashion to Christians.

"The Second World-War was a war between the children of Zeus and the children of Hades, and the losing side (aka the Nazis and their allies) were the children of Hades." ... There are certainly ways to help kids approach the very complicated layers of politics and social aspects regarding the World Wars. This isn't one of them, and I curse Riordan in the tongues of a thousand historians for the paragraph in which he summed it up like that. This is how you're explaining fascists? "Oh, they're the children of Hades, so I guess they're just born evil." This is just vile.

The weird implications of fantasy creatures being treated as animals

Percy doesn't want to walk behind Chiron because he thinks the dude would just randomly take a literal shit on him. Toilet humor is funny, you guys! Except this isn't a horse, no matter how often Percy calls him one. The nymphs aren't trees. Grover is not a goat. It's one thing to integrate features of these because we're talking fantasy mix creatures, but they are still sentient and sapient on a human level! In case of Chiron, he's hundreds of years old and a wise guardian and teacher to Percy and others. Why are we always accompanied by the implication that they are, in some capacity, animals? That's just plain old Fantasy Racism. Stop dehumanizing people you yourself have established as people, please?

Grover is the most present non-human character in this book; so he's the usual victim of this. I cannot count the times Percy calls him a goat boy, or just plain a goat. He is not. A goat. He's a person. I'm supposed to believe he is Percy's best friend. Why does Percy talk to or about him like he's holding him in contempt half the time? Why does Annabeth? She's been living with intelligent non-humans since she was seven! They make fun of him, they dismiss his warnings and instincts as "whining", even though he turns out to be right. They don't treat him seriously, they aren't friendly, they hardly do more than scold him, boss him around or roll their eyes at him.

We still get the other side of the coin

Despite the former problem, Riordan manages to be contemptuous of humans, too. People inside the camp, Annabeth most of all, but Chiron (in a softer way) as well, and eventually Percy and Grover keep talking down at humans. Chiron says the reason why Percy's sword can't kill humans is because "mortals aren't important enough." You know, I would have been fine with "it's to protect humanity" or something; I didn't need a complicated justification for how this sword works. But it would have been nice to not get the most disparaging version that makes icky humans out to be a lower class of life! "Not important enough"? With all his talk of the precious Western civilisation, Chiron should know that mortals are vital to the immortals. No humans, no gods.

Funny thing is, Annabeth repeatedly describes mortals als blind and stupid because they don't know of the mythological goings-on. I thought that was the Mist(TM)? So, what is it? You are magically protected from being perceived as being and doing supernatural stuff - then it isn't the humans' fault, is it? - or people are just stupid and self-censor in their heads. Then why bother with the Mist. The Mist existing and being explained makes me wanna yell at Annabeth to stuff her high-and-mighty attitude. Granted, the Mist isn't too internally consistent. It hides centaurs randomly galloping across the landscape in plain sight of humans, it hides the furies, but it doesn't hide Echidna and the Chimera. I would have liked an explanation for that.

Harmful stereotyping

So. Riordan really hates dog owners, doesn't he? What was with the pink poodle? I mean, I got it; the owners are terrible - that's why he has an unfitting name and why he ran away. But Riordan has to hammer me over the head again. They dyed the doggo pink. Oof. And then Echidna. Here's wondering if Riordan ever depicts a dog owner as a decent person who treats their dog well.

But I take a vastly bigger issue with his consistently hateful depiction of step-parents. Now, Evil Step-Parents(TM) are a well-worn fairytale trope. And Riordan just... never questions it. Personally, I hate it. If it's a step-parent, they're abusive; no exceptions. Percy's stepfather is beating his wife, Annabeth's stepmother treats her as a freak and isolates her from her siblings; it's all very on-the-nose. Only once, I wanna read an acknowledgment that step-parents are just people, and they are as likely to be good people as everyone else. In fact, someone who decides to take a partner who already has a child usually has to internalize that fact at first and accept that this child is going to be a part of the relationship in some capacity. Can we not shit on non-biological parents all the time?

In that context, Annabeth's biological father being a lousy parent as well looks odd, granted. It's definitely something different than Percy's angelic mom. Is Riordan telling me that Athena just has a bad taste in men? Or is that more shitting on humans?

Oh boy, and he loves him some fatshaming. And no, it isn't just "this fat character turns out to be evil", it is "every single character described as being overweight is a negative character in some way, plus depicted as someone with really poor hygiene, plus just generally physically revolting. Go on, re-read the Echidna scene. Tell me that he doesn't go out of his way there to hammer home just how obnoxious and repulsive she is before she turns out to be a monster. How many unflattering words can he squeeze into one paragraph? Why would a kid care? Why does Percy even look at a complete stranger long enough to study how bad her sense of fashion is? Other big characters include Dionysus (more on him when I talk about Riordan's takes on mythology) who's... not evil, but mean-spirited and grumpy and contemptuous and constantly pissed-off. And Gabe, the stinking, ugly, abusive stepfather who literally lives among trash and is so unsubtle that he complains to his wife's face that he didn't get her life insurance because she showed up alive. Gabe Ugliano, because he's ugly, you see? Rick Riordan is funny. He's also trying to beat me to death with an anvil. And showing his ass, because a lot of domestic abuse is way subtler than that.

Ugly = evil is a shorthand that Riordan keeps reusing - and that his hero has weirdly internalized! And don't even tell me of a judgy 12-year-old as an unreliable narrator - because the narrative keeps proving Percy right. Ares' ugly daughters and the ugly girl at human school are brutal bullies (I mean, Annabeth keeps insulting and bullying Percy, but she's pretty, so it's fine when she does it). That Medusa looks elegant and refined and "must have been a beautiful woman once" makes Percy trust her, but the moment he stops trusting her, she starts looking monstrous. It's really lazy characterization.

Also, a fun little detail from Camp Half-Blood: The phenotype of people with sharp noses? Is associated with troublemakers. Uh-huh. I'm comfy with that. That doesn't sound anti-Semitic at all. ... FUCK THIS. Riordan, stereotypes like this are HARMFUL. Do. Your. Research.

An afterthought

Does Riordan have any faith in his own writing? Because the one time I'm sold on a dramatic moment, he ends up subverting it. I'm all, "Percy's falling towards the river! Monsters! Everything is panic!" And then the new chapter starts, and the moment falls flat. Because Riordan doesn't hold onto the fear Percy feels in that moment; he makes him snark about it in hindsight. It's really not a good idea to set up an emotionally captivating moment and then make fun of it.

[jacquelinemerritt]

Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged Episode 10 Review

Originally posted March 9th, 2016

For the most part, a well-balanced conclusion.

Episode 10, the season finale of Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged, has a whole lot going on. It attempts to tackle adapting the entirety of our protagonists’ escape from Shinra, following them from their jail cells to the outskirts of Midgar, while also trying to set up Rufus as the next president of Shinra and close with Cloud confronting Tifa over her selfish and manipulative behavior. That is a lot of ground to cover in fifteen minutes, and to their credit, Takahata101 and Antfish pull off most of what they’re trying to do. The only potential failure comes at the end with Cloud’s confrontation of Tifa, and I’ll explain why near the end.

The most impressive feat here is just how many funny and clever moments Takahata and Antfish pack into each scene. The escape from Shinra Headquarters in particular is packed to the brim as we cross-cut between Cloud fighting with Rufus and Barret fighting a giant robot; Cloud and Rufus’ battle is primarily a battle of wits, with Cloud interrogating Rufus as he attempts to challenge Cloud’s confidence in his friends, and Barret’s battle is primarily about him having to take control of Aerith and Red XIII in order to stand a chance against a giant robot. Both of these battles pull double duty as well, with the first establishing Rufus as a carefree rich kid, and the second showing us Barret’s capability as a leader firsthand, which has only been alluded to before now.

There’s also the inspired motorbike chase scene, where we follow our protagonists through the city streets of Midgar from the perspective of a news helicopter. The news anchors provide clever commentary on the ridiculousness of the chaos and the size of Cloud’s sword, ending with a segue into what I can only assume is a horrifying story about Muggle immigration. The opening is also clever, setting up this new “Sephiroth” character as someone brutal, violent, and interested in our protagonists. Aerith’s comment about him is surprisingly eerie, with Kira Buckland working in clever contrast to the typically joyful demeanor she imbues her with as she comments on his simultaneous familiarity and unfamiliarity.

Finally, at the end of the episode, as Cloud attempts to rally the protagonists to go off in search of Sephiroth, Tifa asserts that Cloud feels safest when he is around her, and Cloud goes off, challenging Tifa on her use of intimidation to manipulate him, and calling her out for failing to respect him as a friend, or even a human being. On the one hand, this scene is incredibly satisfying; I’ve written before about how this show’s thematic concern is how terrible people are still capable of doing the right thing, as evidenced by Cloud’s experiences, and Cloud’s rant serves as a way to for Cloud to challenge Tifa to not just be on the right side, but to be “in the right” as well. The trouble is, though this speech is long overdue, it is a complete tonal shift from the rest of the episode, and contradicting the fairly optimistic tone of the rest of the episode is incredibly jarring, serving to disconnect me from a story that I want to be invested in.

But more than that, the biggest issue I have with this moment is that it doesn’t feel properly set up within the context of the episode. Cloud and Tifa bicker at the beginning of the episode over the possibility that they might be forced to have sex with each other, to be sure, but Tifa also decides to stay back and make sure Cloud survives his battle with Rufus, and though she attempts to downplay the significance of her action by making a “69” joke, it’s quite clear that she stayed behind because she genuinely cares about Cloud. Perhaps the significance was lost on Cloud, but that doesn’t seem to be the case, as he wants to make note of the kindness of Tifa’s action. That leaves us with a scene where Cloud rants about Tifa’s selfishness without having been given a particular reason to raise the issue, and the last moment of the season, as wholly cathartic as it is, doesn’t make much sense within the context that’s been provided.

Rating: 4/5

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Stray Observations

Barrett: “When I was a wee lad, every day I would go to my church, get on my knees, and pray to whatever god would listen. I’d say ‘God, are you there? It’s me, Baby Barret. Now there’s only one thing I want in this world more than anything. Now I don’t care if you take my arm, my friends, or the home in which I sleep, what I want is a talking-dog-best-friend!’ Now here I stand, armless, friendless, and homeless, but not talking-dog-best-friend-less!” Red XII: “Oh my god! We’re best friends?” Barrett: “YEAH!”

*Standing in a massive pool of blood* Red XII: “Scouting report: where do I begin?”

Rufus: “Think of the chocobo as a spaceship.” Palmer: “Ah, that makes sense!”

Barret: “Vice President Rufus-Ain’t-Nepotism-A-Bitch-Shinra.”

Tifa: “Okay, sweetheart, can you do me a solid? Let the adult handle this.” Aerith: “Oh, you’re right. You are much older looking. Bye!” Savage.

Cloud: “There’s nothing my friends can’t handle!” Barret, facing down a giant robot: “We cannot handle this!”

Cloud: “Your family’s weird.” Rufus: “You have no idea.” Palmer, flying a helicopter: “I’m taking this to the moon, and you can’t stop me!”

I’m going to nitpick a moment and say that the flashback structure of Barret’s attempt to leave through the front door is a bit awkward, and there’s no justification for the nonlinear storytelling. It does match the rapid fire back and forth cutting of the previous escape sequence, but I feel like going through the events linearly would have been just as, if not more, effective from a storytelling standpoint. I tend to be fairly harsh on nonlinear storytelling though, so I recognize that this might be coming down to my personal taste (but I also never consider that harshness to be unfair).

Tifa staying back could open up a moment of interesting character development, where Tifa, in attempting to begin doing good, must be challenged on everything she has done wrong before she could make any further progress. But that doesn’t change the moment’s lack of cohesion with the final scene.

[itsbrandy]

Burnout Chapter 5

A/N: We finally get to learn the woman's name! I imagined when she meets Dieter, he's in this super comfy looking outfit. Flailing his hands about and she can't stop staring at them. He makes me weak looking like this.

Word Count: 5.5k

End of Episode song: Weak For Your Love - Thee Sacred Souls

Chapter 5: Bee

For the first time in her life, she found herself in the very same room as Dieter Bravo. Her current obsession, the man of all men, and most importantly, the man with whom she had started to envision living life with in her new ideal. 

Her daydreams were filled with him and now he was here. He was real, tan, and laughing with his makeup artist right in front of her. 

The table of food in the back of the conference room was not appealing to her at all, but still she made it her mission. Trying as hard as she could to not look at Dieter (as if it was humanly possible to even do such a thing), she focused instead on the croissants, cupcakes, veggies, and dip that awaited her. 

Staci rescued her from her own thoughts by asking her about her sick day, but the questions didn’t exactly save her. She still had to lie to her coworker and hide the events of the day prior. 

“I just had like a head cold,” she lied easily. “Didn’t want to sneeze on the pastries or anything.”

“I get it,” Staci said emphatically. “Plus, you work harder than most of us here. You deserve a day off. Did you cuddle up with your man on your day off?”

The woman flushed deeply, grateful for the other conversations in the room covering up theirs. She didn’t want Dieter to hear that there was another man in the picture, even though that man was her long-term boyfriend and puppy co-parent. Let alone the fact that she was feeling completely disconnected from her partner. 

She was hesitant to share her relationship problems with Staci, but she had also spoken to Staci before about how she wished they could get out more. Staci knew that she was dissatisfied with her partner’s affinity for being a homebody. 

“We’ve been having some trouble,” the woman admitted with a grimace. “So, not really.”

“Oh no, girl what?” Staci asked, guiding her past Dieter and the other stars. “What happened? Do you need to talk about it at all?”

That was not her goal. She distinctly didn’t want there to be a chance that Dieter could overhear them speaking about her partner. Her words sat in her mouth delicately as they crossed in front of the cast. Staci cut between the lead female role and a supporting character, making the conscious choice to not go past Dieter himself. 

“I’ve just been feeling like my life needs more,” she decided on. It was an accurate statement and probably more true than other things he could have said. “I’m just looking for more than what I have right now.”

Staci looked back at her as she approached the snack table. “Huh,” Staci said. “So, it’s a you thing then?”

Staci grabbed a plate for her and handed it over. She then grabbed one for herself. 

“Thank you,” she said. The woman shrugged in response to Staci’s question. “Yeah, I guess so. You know I love working here. It’s a dream job.”

“But it isn’t your dream?” Staci filled in the gaps while she loaded raw carrots and ranch dipping sauce onto her plate. 

“It’s not,” she agreed. “I wanted to do something different before…” The mini blueberry muffins were calling her name, so she placed two on her plate. 

“What was that?” Staci asked her. “Your dream?”

The woman shrugged, not wanting to profess her desire to be an actress in the same room as some of her favorite professionals in the industry. 

“I don’t really want to talk about it. It’s kind of silly,” she admitted. Looking at the table before her, she looked for a way to change the topic of conversation. “Wow, those madeleines look gorgeous.”

“I made them,” Staci said with a bright smile. 

She grinned at her. “Of course, you did. Did you come in early?”

“I mean, if you knew yesterday that you’d be baking for Dieter Bravo…” Staci trailed off, knowing how she would answer. “Wouldn’t you?”

The woman laughed. She would have been, she would’ve been here all night trying to impress him with her expertise. Or maybe she wouldn’t have been. She might have been too nervous to even show her face if she had advanced notice of Dieter’s visit. 

“Maybe,” she conceded, stealing a glance back at Dieter now that they had passed him successfully. “I like my sleep though.”

Staci smirked and finished up her plate. There were carrots, dip, chips, and a couple of cookies filling half of her plate. “Want to go sit in the corner?”

The woman followed Staci’s eyes to two chairs in the back corner of the conference room. They were completely out of Dieter’s view; she could only see the back of his perfect hair sitting in the chair. 

He tilted his head to the side, allowing his makeup artist to see his face better in the professional light that had been set up around the room. 

The makeup artist dabbed at his cheeks, lightly melting concealer into his dark circles that no one knew existed. But she knew now, he had perfect skin that just needed to be gently applied to accentuate his natural beauty.

“Wow,” she said under her breath. She shook her head slightly in disbelief. There was no way that human beauty on this earth should just be allowed to exist like that merely feet away from her. 

It was unfair. She couldn’t help but feel like whatever power that be was laughing at her from wherever they made their omnipotent residence. Dieter Bravo was being dangled before her like beef jerky in front of a hungry dog. 

Staci took a crunchy bite of a ranch-loaded carrot and observed him as well. The makeup artist started to apply clear brow gel to his eyebrows, aligning them just so.

“I know,” Staci agreed with her mouth slightly full. “What a man.”

The woman concurred and started to eat her mini muffins. She carefully unwrapped each of them to drive off the nerves before she ate. Even though Dieter wasn’t watching her, she still felt self-conscious eating in the same room as him. 

She felt insufferable and slightly embarrassed that she felt so insecure in front of him. In her real life she was confident, she wouldn’t change the way she spoke to a man or the way that she carried herself even if she was interested in them. 

Though she had never felt like a supermodel, the men that had been in her life had pursued her. And even the actor that approached her in Whole Foods the day before had approached her. But something about Dieter Bravo had her reverting to girlish tendencies. 

She had last felt this way in high school, unable to function as a human person because of a boy. It was a terrible lesson taught to young women that they needed to make themselves smaller in order to be loved and valued by men. She wasn’t allowed to eat. Wasn’t allowed to take a drink, wasn’t allowed to burp or laugh too loud or make foul jokes. 

But none of that was true. And she hadn’t followed those practices that had been so culturally ingrained in her since she was a child. Instead, she existed as herself, genuinely. 

Keeping this in mind, the woman rolled her shoulders back to loosen her form of the nerves and allowed herself to slouch a bit and eat her muffins. 

Who was she kidding? Her circumstances for meeting these superstars were already less than ideal. She had barely slept, had tear-stained eyes and was wearing one of the least flattering garments known to man. 

Her bright white culinary outfit was hardly a shape hugging pair of leggings or a red carpet gown. There was no way that Dieter or anyone else would be able to regard her as an equal here. Though she and Staci had been in the room for nearly ten minutes now, no one had so much as looked in their direction. 

“These are good too. Did you make these also?” she asked Staci. “I haven’t had muffins this good in ages.”

“Yup,” Staci said with her mouth full of food. “Aren’t they good? I wish we made muffins for scratch for the Parks. They’re so easy.”

“They would be hard to theme though,” the woman said sadly. “Or maybe not. With a little bit of decoration, you could sell them as a little trio of muffins. Mad Hatter’s Muffins, Moana Muffins, Maleficent Muffins…”

She listed more alliteration names which were common for Disney treats, but she wasn’t certain where blueberry muffins would fit in. There were many practical snacks within the Disney parks but most of the sweet baked goods were more elaborate. 

The appeal of treats that doubled as advertisements for both the Parks and the movies themselves was the very reason why Dieter Bravo and the rest of the main cast of the newest Star Wars show was sitting in their conference room. 

The woman looked up again and Staci’s face looked stunned. “What? Maleficent Muffin not good?” she asked. 

Staci shook her head and excused herself, dashing out of the conference room and into the hallway as quickly as she could. “Bathroom.” was all she said. 

“I’d like a Moana Muffin,” a smooth, deep voice said from the woman’s left. Someone at the snack table had said it. 

The woman looked over, her head turning in what felt like slow motion as she turned to face the man that had overheard their conversation. As she turned her head, she saw that the chair in which Dieter had been sitting was now empty. 

And sure enough the man that was standing at the snack table was none other than Dieter Bravo himself. He was tall and his warm skin looked somehow darker under the office-building fluorescents. Or maybe he had gotten tanner since the woman had last seen him photographed. 

His eyes were just as kind and playful as they were in digital form but here, he was real. He was real and he was looking at her. His gaze was something she could only describe as sultry, but she doubted that he meant it to be. 

He looked at her like he was considering her next move. Almost like a chess player evaluating his opponent. And damn, it was sexy. 

“Oh yeah?” she replied, not sure of what else she should say to him. Her tone was suggestive, also by complete accident. 

“I think that would be a nice treat. Maybe some blue icing on it. Just like little waves?” Dieter held one of Staci’s miniature blueberry muffins in his hands. She couldn’t help but notice how nice and strong they seemed to be. His long fingers traced where he would position the waves on the muffin itself. 

“That’s a good idea, actually,” she said with a smile. “I’ll have to add it to my list of themed baked goods.”

She felt her face flush deep and hot at his gaze. It was insistent. She could feel it, he wanted to talk to her. He deposited the muffin onto his empty plate.

“Well, only if you credit me, of course,” Dieter said with an easy grin. “Waves by Dieter...you at least have to give me something.”

The woman shrugged. “I did come up with the name though.”

Dieter laughed easily and the woman found herself feeling slightly dizzy. 

“Then it was a joint effort. You and I both,” he said. 

Without letting the words sit in her mind, the woman smiled back at him like he hadn’t just “you and me’d” her. He had no idea how much she loved him, how much of her life she dedicated to him at the moment. And somehow, he had her sitting in his very hand over some mini muffins that her coworker had made. 

“Well, if you make it, I’ll eat it,” he said diplomatically. He spooned some chips onto his plate as well and grabbed a tiny bottle of water to complete his small snack arrangement. 

“I didn’t make them, actually,” she admitted. “My coworker, Staci, did.”

Dieter took a bite out of the top of a mini muffin. “It’s good. But I bet you can make them twice as great.”

The woman shook her head ‘no’. “Staci’s just as good as me if not better.”

“Humble,” Dieter said simply, before tossing the rest of the mini muffin in his mouth. He quickly added a second one to his plate to replace it.

Her brows knit together in confusion. She had heard the word ‘humble’ but she didn’t understand what he meant by that. Staci was talented too, there was nothing wrong with admitting that. 

“Sorry?” she asked.

“You’re humble,” he repeated. “Disney picks you as one of their star bakers and you don’t think you can make a better mini muffin?”

I would do it for you, Dieter, she thought to herself. I would make ten thousand mini muffins for you. Holy shit.

“I would try to,” she admitted. Though the subtext of her words was known to only her. 

“That’s better,” Dieter said, grabbing a napkin and flashing her his white teeth. “There’s that confidence and drive.”

“Sure,” she conceded, though she felt conflicted on whether or not she was truly confident and driven. At times she felt like she only moved forward in life on pure survival instinct. 

“You aren’t confident and driven?” he asked flirtatiously. “I must have the wrong person.”

The woman blushed at his compliment and fiddled with the food on her plate. “You don’t know me.”

Dieter pressed his lips into a line and looked at her curiously. “You’re right, I don’t.”

As soon as he agreed with her, he walked away with his full plate of food and joined his costars, leaving the woman reeling with the realization that she had just blown her first ever conversation with Dieter fucking Bravo because she couldn’t accept a compliment properly. 

No one ever compliments me! She thought angrily. I’m not used to it, what else am I supposed to say?

“I have a chair available for you, Miss,” one of the makeup artists said to her. She was cute and had curly bright pink hair. “I promise that I won’t bite.”

The woman smiled at her and stood to deposit her plate in the trash. “I believe you.”

She then crossed the conference room with the paranoid feeling that Dieter was watching her as she walked. 

“I’m Becca,” the pink-haired makeup artist said with her hand extended. She shook it and took a seat in the chair. 

“You have gorgeous skin,” Becca said to her, looking it over and starting to craft a custom foundation shade. “I would say that all you need is light coverage, but I want to get you a good blend for TV.”

The woman smiled. She didn’t mind the special treatment. Her threshold for complaints in the negatives. There was nothing that could truly bother her about the opportunity to appear in a recorded segment with her favorite actor and celebrity crush. She only hoped that Staci hadn’t let her nerves get the best of her when she saw Dieter Bravo eating one of her muffins. 

“Gorgeous eyes too,” Becca mused as she applied the foundation and blended it seamlessly into her skin. 

The woman relaxed as Becca blended product after product into her skin, setting layers and adding details and perfecting her work. 

“Your face is really made for the screen. You have so many natural angles and contours.”

“Really?” she asked. 

Becca nodded. “You’ve heard of how the camera adds 5 pounds right?”

“Mmhm,” the woman agreed. 

“That’s much less likely to happen to you because of how clear your bone structure is. Other people, they can look like they have a circle for a face unless you contour them properly. Your face kind of just does all of the work for me. I’m just following your natural lines, girl.”

“Oh wow,” she said, keeping her eyes closed as Becca applied product to her forehead and nose. “So, are you saying that I’m meant to be a star?”

Becca laughed. “Honestly, yeah. You’re making my job easy.”

“Well, that feels good,” the woman admitted. “If I ever wanted to go into acting, do you think I would have a pretty easy job?”

Becca was silent for a moment, sending the woman’s confidence plummeting downward. “I think so. There needs to be more representation for Asian women in acting. I always just see the same old faces on the screen. No offense, you know.”

“No, I know,” the woman said. “I totally agree.”

“Hey,” another voice interjected. Even with her eyes closed, the woman knew that it was Staci returning to the room. She opened her eyes and saw Staci standing before her. 

“Hey Staci, what’s going on?” she asked as Becca put another layer of powder on her face. “Are you doing okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just kind of nervous,” Staci admitted. “But they called me back in here to start doing hair and makeup.”

To her right, another makeup artist waved in Staci’s direction. “I’ve got you right over here, doll!”

“Thank you,” Staci said. “Sorry that I was late.”

“It’s totally okay,” Staci’s makeup artist said, beckoning her over. “I promise you; we totally understand that it’s intimidating being around celebrities. I’ve been doing this for almost 15 years, and I still am not used to hanging around A-listers all day. It never gets easier, I promise you.”

“I don’t know if that makes me feel all that much better,” Staci admitted, gaining laughs from all of the people that had been in the vicinity. 

“It does make me a little sick to my stomach too,” the woman admitted. Her own makeup artist was starting to work on her eye makeup, brushing light browns into her crease and winging out her lash line just slightly. 

Becca handed her a mirror after she completed her handiwork and the woman looked at her eyes in awe. She had managed to define her eyes well without whitewashing them and she looked absolutely stunning. From feeling like she had gotten into a car crash this morning to looking flawless, she was thoroughly impressed with the makeup artist’s handiwork. 

“I’m sorry about my hair,” she said as Becca moved toward her messy bun. She had done it in the car, trying to avoid having to brush it. Of course, now someone else was going to be dealing with her mess of tangles and knots. At least she had thought to shower. That much she was grateful for. 

“It’s fine, girl,” Becca said. “We just need to get this back into a tighter bun. Production wants a slicked back bun for you.”

The woman nodded. She liked to have a few pieces hanging forward just a touch to give her a “messy baker” look, but she understood the desire to have her appear professional and rigid like the chefs that people associated with Disney were. 

As Becca started on detangling her hair with spray and a comb, the Star Wars actors began to filter out of the room and into the hallway. 

“Are we running late?” the woman asked. “Why are they leaving?”

“We have a tour before we start shooting,” Dieter answered as he passed her chair. He looked at her and Staci and winked. “Looking great, ladies.”

The woman looked at Becca wide-eyed. 

No way did Dieter Bravo just wink at me, she thought. There was no way that had just happened to her in real life. The actual real life Dieter Bravo had not only spoken to her twice, but he had winked at her.

“Oh my god,” Becca said, releasing a breath after Dieter and the rest of the cast had exited ear shot. She started combing at the woman’s hair with more intensity. “I can’t believe he just- wow.”

“I know,” Staci agreed. “Isn’t he just the hottest man you’ve ever seen?”

Becca laughed. “Yeah, he is. Girl, I’m a lesbian but that is a man.” 

“Did he talk to you?” Staci asked her. “Like when I had to leave? About the muffin?”

“Yeah,” the woman admitted. “He did. He talked to me about his idea for a Moana themed muffin.”

Staci sighed. “No way. I just couldn’t do it. I’ve been obsessing over that man for I don’t even know how long, and I just couldn’t sit there and have to talk to him.”

“What are you going to do for filming?” the woman asked her. “Won’t you have to?”

Staci smiled sadly at her. “I asked to switch. You’re with Dieter now instead of me.”

The woman swore she could feel her heart stop beating in her chest and then kickstart again like the motor of a gas lawn mower. It slowed to a screeching halt and then chugged up once more with all of the drama that the comparison implied.

“I didn’t even know we had groups,” she said breathlessly. “I thought it was just bakers and all of them in one room.”

Staci shook her head ‘no’. “Nope. There’s going to be one group segment, but the tastings are going to be two stars to one baker.”

“And now I’ve got Dieter,” she deduced. 

Staci nodded. “Now, you’ve got Dieter. And you better not ask to switch back. I could not handle it. I would embarrass myself in front of the entire world.”

The woman laughed. “There’s no way the entire world is watching a segment on the new Star Wars treats at the Disney Parks.”

“Maybe not the whole world, but anyone who likes Star Wars will probably watch,” Becca pointed out. 

The woman glared at her. “Becca, you’re not helping us out here on the nerves front.”

Becca laughed and continued her work on the woman’s hair. “Okay, fine. But there still will be a lot of people watching. This is a really cool opportunity for both of you.” 

The woman nodded and closed her eyes once more. She didn’t want to think about it. Her acting career needed opportunities like this but the pressure of having to interact with her celebrity crush was crippling how she would normally approach a situation like this. 

If it wasn’t Dieter Bravo, she would still be nervous. But if it wasn’t Dieter Bravo, she would also know how to do this. With him, she didn’t know how to act.

The next time that she saw Dieter was back in the employee locker room of the bakery. It was really a private space, but Disney seemed to want to give more of a behind-the-scenes look at the bakery even though the lockers had nothing to do with baking. There she quickly explained the design process and showed off one of her many notebooks with brainstorming ideas. 

She explained that usually, her boss would tell her about a movie or tv show that Disney wanted to promote with a dessert or meal in the Parks. Then, she would begin to sketch out some ideas for recipes taking into consideration the many possible locations in the Parks that they could be served at. 

“The recipes are mostly our own here but sometimes we get directions that are more specific. It’s still such a fun and collaborative way of making food that thousands of people get to enjoy as they come to the Parks,” she explained, locking eyes with Dieter as she did. 

They had been instructed specifically to ignore the many cameras surrounding them for this portion of filming. 

“I get such satisfaction hearing about how fun people find it to eat desserts and snacks inspired by their favorite characters and films. Our treats are part of what makes Disneyland magical. You can only access these special desserts right here in the Parks,” she continued. 

“Cut!” someone yelled, and the woman found herself relaxing her posture. 

“Alright, that’s a wrap on the opening segment. Now, let’s divide into our teams and head to the two test kitchens,” the producer said with a demanding clap of his hands. 

“Oh my god,” Staci said, her eyes wide with excitement for her work friend. 

She was going to film with and interview The Dieter Bravo. 

“Wish me luck,” the woman said with a sad smile. She was both eager and nervous to be nearly one on one with Dieter, but she was sad that Staci felt like she couldn’t do it. They had bonded together over their love of him. 

“Oh my god, you’re going to do so great.” Staci said.

The other star that she had been assigned was one that she wasn’t too familiar with. Her name was Amanda, but other than that she wasn’t really sure what her role was supposed to be within the show. In fact, she barely knew what the show was about. She had been told about the Star Wars promotional desserts more than six months in advance of their launch in the Parks scheduled for next week. 

She stayed silent and within her own mind while she walked to the test kitchen where she would meet with Dieter and Amanda. The two stars trailed behind her as the group walked, talking among themselves about an event that was coming up. The woman tuned it out. She was jealous as it was that Amanda talked to him effortlessly. 

What she would give to be Dieter’s equal. 

“Alright, quiet on set,” someone said from behind her.

“Hi Amanda, hi Dieter,” she said, as instructed. 

“Hello!” Dieter said happily, taking a seat at the bar height seat across the table from her. Amanda echoed his greeting with a smile so perfect that the woman thought her teeth must be veneers. 

“Tell us more about yourself,” Dieter said as planned. This was as far as what had been scripted for this exchange and the woman felt her heart thundering at the improvisation aspect of this segment. “Before we get into the desserts, I want to know about the baker behind the creations.”

“Sure!” the woman said happily. “I grew up in Northern California and I have two fur babies that I love with my whole heart.” 

“There’s no way that’s it,” Dieter protested. “What else is there to know about you? What did you want to be when you were little?”

“An actress,” she replied effortlessly. 

“Oh wow, really?” Amanda asked, leaning forward in her seat. Her tone was condescending, but the woman kept her true feelings from displaying on her face.

She laughed instead and kept the tone of the conversation light and airy. “Yeah but of course, it doesn’t work out that way for everyone. Dreams change and my dream changed to making amazing creations for Disney lovers of all ages.”

It was a lie, but she sold it as the truth. Though this job had been a dream of hers for a time, it was not the dream like acting was. Something about Dieter’s expression told her that he knew she was bluffing. 

Instead of calling her on it, he grinned at her and then turned to a camera that was trained on him. 

“I love nicknames,” Dieter said to the camera. The woman watched as he played up his charm and intrigue. He was somehow just as mysterious as he had been back at the snack table but he was much more animated. He then looked back at her. “Nicknames are such a great way to get to know a person. Finding out what their friends and family call them is so interesting.”

“Nicknames are great,” she agreed. 

“What do people call you?” he asked. He stretched his arms out and leaned forward onto the table of the test kitchen, eagerly awaiting her answer. 

“Um,” the woman said, pursing her lips and trying to think of an appropriate nickname. 

There were plenty of pet names from both her current partner and her ex, but none of them would be suitable for the camera. Babe, sugar, etc. weren’t exactly PG. “I’m not sure.”

“There has to be someone out there that calls you a great nickname,” Dieter insisted. “I know that there is. You seem like you have great nicknames.”

There was one. But it had been retired from use for quite some time. And it was embarrassing. With the pressure of having the camera on her and the hesitancy to admit that she had no one around her that gave her genuine nicknames, she picked it. 

“Bee,” she confessed. “My mom called me Bee after I found out that I was allergic. But she doesn’t call me that anymore.”

Dieter looked pleased at the answer. “Let’s revive it then.”

The woman blanched. She didn’t want Dieter Bravo to call her by her childhood nickname, but she could hardly tell him that him calling her Bee didn’t align with her sexual fantasies of him. 

“Okay,” she said, smiling for the camera’s benefit. 

“Alright then, Bee,” Dieter said. “Show me what you have in mind for our new show. What is going to give Disney Parks guests the best experience? Which one am I going to have to beg you to make me over and over?”

She resisted the urge to blush and utterly melt at Diet’s insistence on using her silly childhood nickname and insinuating that she would bake specifically for him… and that he would beg for her. 

Ugh! Stop it! she scolded herself within her own mind. 

“Are you asking me to start with the best one?” she asked him with a coy smile. The desserts were all lined up on a shelf at knee-height behind the counter. 

“Yes please,” Dieter said eagerly. 

“I’ll take anything you have to offer,” Amanda agreed. “We’re just excited to eat something!”

Amanda was lying, obviously given the entire star-caliber snack table that Disney had laid out for them. Still, she reached down and brandished two plates with two Star Wars themed jelly donuts. They each had a galaxy pattern for icing and a tiny white chocolate spaceship atop them. 

“These are the Galaxy’s Edge Donuts,” she announced, placing one plate in front of Dieter and another in front of Amanda. “They were created here in this very test kitchen. With galaxy vanilla icing and lemon galactic filling. The small ship on the top is a handmade white chocolate mold.”

Dieter grabbed for his donut eagerly and took a bite of it before groaning at the delicious taste of the snack. She felt her heart flutter at the realization that Dieter Bravo was moaning while he ate food that she had baked for him. Well, she hadn’t baked this batch, but she had made the recipe and designed them. 

“I love this one,” Dieter said with his mouth still slightly full. “Did you create this one, Bee?”

“I did,” she said proudly. “What do you think, Amanda?”

“I love it,” Amanda lied. “I don’t usually like lemon in desserts but this one truly is out of this world.”

“Oh, I disagree, I love lemon,” Dieter said defensively. “Bee, you know how to make dessert. I have no doubts you could do anything you set your mind to. I bet if you auditioned for a movie role right now you’d get it too.”

She flushed deep red at the compliment, hoping and praying that the full-coverage foundation that Becca had mixed up would cover her blush. She knew Dieter was a sweetheart without even knowing him, but she had never imagined that he would be this sweet. 

“This one is a hit, guys,” Dieter said to the camera. “When you’re in the Parks next, you’ve got to stop by and get yourselves one. I know this is going to be my new go-to.”

“Oh, but Dieter you haven’t tried the others!” she protested. 

He laughed and referenced his now-half eaten donut. “I don’t know how you top this!”

“You did ask me for the best one first,” she reasoned. “But I have two more great desserts to show you that I designed.”

Dieter clapped his hands together and Amanda let out another fake giggle. 

“Bring it on then, Bee,” Dieter said happily. 

“We want more!” Amanda agreed. “What’s next?”

“Cut!” the producer said, startling the woman out of her next move. She had planned to lean down and procure two plates of the next dessert. “Clear these plates out of the way and take a few minutes before we do the next round. Which ones are next?”

“The-the cookies,” she stuttered, shaken out of her confident streak.

“Okay, cool,” the producer said. “We’ll start again in two minutes. Drink some water, all three of you."

She complied and couldn’t help but watch as Dieter drank out of his small sized water bottle. She loved how he looked holding small things. It made his hands look massive. She wondered how her small hands would look with her fingers intertwined with his. 

“You okay, Bee?” Dieter asked her after he had swallowed. “You’re doing amazing, really. I think you’re a natural at this.”

“Yeah,” she said, feeling the heat rush to her face once more. “I’m doing just great. Thank you, Dieter.”

She knows Dieter Bravo now. 

And he’s the only person in the world that calls her Bee. 

Chapter 6 | Series Masterlist

[smile-files]

okay okay i just finished watching camp cretaceous and i gotta talk about ben. like as a character is he just so funny

ben starts out polite and shy and sweet and afraid of literally everything. like all the other campers have no idea why in god's name he's here (which is completely fair, as he doesn't seem to want to be here either) - but then he befriends an ankylosaurus, which he names bumpy blongy scimbly scromplo. and then he gets taken by a pterodactyl :)

i think one of the strangest things to me is how you have apocalypse shows like this and of the main cast only one will realistically react to almost being killed. like ben almost gets killed by a carnotaur after being separated from the group and the second he finds cover he just instantly starts crying and like. finally. the fact that i should consider that cathartic is ridiculous lmao

no but seriously it's so funny he's gone for a whole season i think and the second he comes back we get an episode about every new trauma he's unlocked. now he's paranoid and jaded and really disconnected from his friends (and people generally)... this boy fears death. this boy will poke death in the eyes. this boy's first best friend is a dinosaur. this boy will commit arson in self defense. this boy thinks everything threatens him and so will continuously commit arson unprompted. this boy has just screamed for the first time ever and is now startled by how loud he was. trauma catharsis boy! get beaten up by the narrative and then beat up the narrative in revenge! let's go!!

it's been a while so i don't remember how this was addressed right after he rejoined the other campers but anyway his friends are so shocked and so concerned and ben's like shut up i need to blow something up or i'm gonna have a panic attack. y'know eventually he eases back into the group and gets to be an absolute dork again but he's always trauma catharsis boy from here on out. even if he gets barely any screentime later on lol </3

um but yeah it's sad how in the later seasons (especially the last) we don't get much ben-centric stuff... like there was the thing about him not wanting to leave bumpy on the island but besides that it's mostly ben being a dork who knows way too much about explosives.

it's hilarious, ben is like... gay with no gaydar (in a general sense). i'm skipping ahead a bit but yeah when yaz comes out to him - not to say that cishet people can't understand or sympathize with queer experiences altogether but idk his response is so earnest and thought-out that it just seems to me that this boy is queer in some way himself (trans icon? trans icon). and then it's really funny because in the season before ben completely missed a social cue (autistic icon? autistic icon) and thought that yaz was into him when she was just trying to third wheel for someone else. like ben do you even know what flirting is? are you sure?

y'know actually ben is scared of everything for the whole series, it's just that now he chooses fight over flight. if you cover his eyes to play "guess who" he'll shriek, and immediately turn around and stab you. ben surprise party incident 5 dead 13 injured. that's really funny to me because it's taking the timid -> brave pipeline to the logical extreme: still terrified, but now with weapons lol

ben is so funny. my beautiful, disturbed, beautiful boy (to quote darius). my guy who starts a battle whenever he makes eye contact with someone. my scrawny kid with a giant dinosaur. my will byers kinnie. my boy who's better at combat than conversation. ben really carried camp cretaceous and you better admit it

[bi-bard]

They Know All of My Habits, but They Don’t Know About You - Jack Kline Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: They Know All of My Habits, but They Don’t Know About You

Pairing: Jack Kline X Reader

Based On: all my ghosts

Word Count: 2,798 words

Warning(s): violence, kidnapping

Summary: (Starts with a scene from season 14, episode 16, but is disconnected from canon beyond that) For unknown reasons, (Y/n) finds themself back in Lebanon. However, it’s not as miserable as they remember it being, mostly thanks to a new resident that goes by Jack. All (Y/n) can hope is that those unknown reasons don’t ruin things going forward.

Author's Note: I keep having to remind myself that it's okay to mess up the timeline because it's fanfiction and none of that matters.

Lizzy McAlpine - “five seconds flat” Writing Challenge Masterlist

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

---------------------------------

I expected to be miserable when I went back to Lebanon.

It was a small town that was boring most days.

Why would I go back to a place that made me miserable?

Because bored meant safe. I was happy to go back if it was for my own good.

Getting back into the swing of life on my own was a little more difficult than I had hoped, but I was starting to fall into a pattern. I was starting to feel like this place was home again.

I was grabbing a few last-minute groceries when I saw Jack for the first time. They were standing up at the counter of the Lebanon mini-mart, trying to buy a pack of beer. I watched as they stumbled and failed to buy a pack of beer.

I bit back a laugh as they were sent away.

They looked back as they walked out, and we made eye contact as I stepped up to the counter. They stumbled for a moment and bumped into the door.

I bit back another laugh. They grinned at me nervously before waving.

"Your total is $20.97," I snapped back into the focus when the girl read out my total. I handed put my card into the chip reader and chuckled at myself. "Their name's Jack."

"What," I asked, putting my card away and tucking my wallet into my pocket.

She handed me the bag, "The person that you just had that... moment with. His name is Jack."

"Thanks," I muttered before walking out as fast as I could.

Jack was still outside when I walked out. They were frowning and putting their phone in their pocket. I took a deep breath and walked over to them.

"Jack, right," I asked.

They nodded before waving at me, "Hello."

"Hi," I grinned. "I'm (Y/n). It's nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too," they replied. "Sorry about falling earlier."

"You don't have to apologize for that," I chuckled. They nodded. I felt the nerves from the store following me. "I... umm... I should probably get home, but maybe I'll see you around."

They nodded again, "Yeah."

Then, we both ended up walking in the same direction. I let out a laugh.

"What," they asked, eyebrows furrowed. They looked like a puppy.

"Nothing," I replied. "I didn't know we were going to walk the same way. It just made me chuckle."

"Oh," they nodded. "You're right. That's funny."

I bit my lip for a second when I felt like my smile was getting ridiculously big.

"Come on," I motioned my head down the road.

We walked down the road together. We talked a little bit, but it was mostly a comfortable silence. We both seemed to be hiding something, but we were both accepting that there were walls around a few subjects.

I was honestly disappointed when I got to my place. The one small apartment building in Lebanon.

"This is my place," I pointed at the building. "It was nice meeting you and talking to you."

"You too," Jack replied.

We waved to each other before I started walking back into my building. I paused at the door. Fuck it. I went through all of the trouble to get here and feel safe. I deserved one good thing.

"Jack," I called, jogging back out to the sidewalk. They were only a little way down the road. "Do you wanna go to dinner? I know this diner in town, and I haven't gotten to go in ages. We could tomorrow?"

They paused before looking down and smiling for a moment, "Yeah, I think I'd like that."

"Good," I replied. "Umm... wanna meet here tomorrow at about six?"

"Okay," they nodded. "Bye."

"Bye," I waved again before actually heading inside.

Once I got my door shut, I rested against my door. After a moment of realization, I let out a laugh and did a celebratory fist bump. After such a long period of fear and isolation, I was so happy to finally let myself do something for me. I wasn't just surviving. I was letting myself be happy.

--time skip--

The next night ended up being perfect.

We spent the evening just being... happy. That was the best word I had for it. I was able to shrug off the thoughts that told me to just go. To go and run and not drag Jack through my shit.

We were sitting and talking about anything that we could.

I told them about how I had most of my life moving around and how I decided to come back to Lebanon. They told me about how they pretty much had three dads raising them and they all spent a lot of time traveling. Jack had been so sweet through the entire night. It made me feel so comfortable.

On the walk home, I reached over and grabbed their hand. I caught them staring down at our hands before smiling and looking forward again. It was a calm silence that I never thought I was going to experience with anyone.

We made it to my apartment building a few minutes later.

I stopped on the sidewalk and smiled at them.

I could feel those old thoughts coming back. The ones that told me to just run and never think about this again.

"I had a great time," I said, trying to shrug off my rude ass brain.

"So did I," Jack replied. There was a moment of silence. "This was a date, right? Dean said it was, but I wasn't sure."

I paused for a moment, "I... I would like it to be. If you want it to be."

"I'd like it to be a date," they smiled. "Can I kiss you?"

I nodded.

Jack awkwardly leaned over and pressed their lips to mine. It was kind of harsh and awkward. I moved back just a bit and let out a quiet chuckle before cupping the sides of their face and kissing them back gently. They seemed to relax after that but was still standing kind of awkwardly.

I slowly pulled back and smiled at them.

They grinned back. Their cheeks had gone red.

I stepped back, getting ready to go back to my apartment, "Bye, Jack."

"Bye," they waved at me. I waved back before turning around and going inside.

When I got back to my apartment, I took a moment to look out the window. Jack was still standing there. I watched them look down for a moment, touch their lips gently, and then slowly start walking away.

I smiled and laughed to myself.

I could get used to things like that.

--time skip--

Over the next few months, Jack and I continued spending time together. There wasn't a lot to do in Lebanon, but we were happy.

It was like we had become each other safe spaces. Anything that had been haunting us just didn't matter when we were together. No need to go looking for answers. Just time to let things lie.

We were meeting outside my apartment one day. Jack seemed very excited when they were walking over.

"Hey-"

"I want you to meet my family," they cut me off excitedly.

"Really," I asked after a moment of shock.

"Yeah," they nodded. "They want to meet you too."

I smiled, "Okay."

They pulled me into a tight hug. I chuckled a little as they held me. I stepped back after a moment, taking their hand as we started walking down the street.

"Did you have a time in mind," I asked.

"Is tonight too soon," they replied. "Dean's making burgers. He told me he'd give me a call when he was gonna get started."

"Tonight will be fine," I nodded. I leaned over and kissed their cheek. "Thank you for this."

They looked down and blushed.

"Am I going to meet your family at some time," Jack asked after a minute.

"Well," I let out a sigh, "my family and I aren't really close. I don't... I don't want you to meet them."

"Because of me?"

"Oh, God no," I stepped in front of them and cupped their face. "Not even a little bit. You are amazing, Jack. My family... just isn't. They've ruined a lot of things for me. I don't want them trying to get to you."

They gave that puppy dog look that could melt the evil queen's heart.

I leaned over and kissed their cheek again, "You're an amazing person, Jack. None of this is because of you."

Their face relaxed and a soft grin even started taking over. They leaned over and kissed me softly. I grinned back as they leaned back.

"You're amazing too," they replied. My smile got wider.

"What do you wanna do today while we wait," I asked.

"The library," Jack suggested. "I like when you read to me."

I nodded, "That sounds great."

--time skip--

We spent most of our day in the library.

It was honestly one of the best spots in town. It was calm and quiet. Disconnected from the world around us. It was the best place to go when a crowd just seemed overwhelming.

We only left because Dean called Jack about dinner. Jack promised that the two of us were on our way before we started walking out of the library.

It was later than we realized, but we still hoped for a calm walk.

However, we never got that far.

A car pulled up to the side of the road and a group of people got out. They grabbed Jack first, knocking them out and dragging them around to the trunk. I yelled at the group as I was grabbed. They covered my mouth and managed to knock me out before anyone heard me.

When I came too, we were back in my apartment. Jack and I were tied to chairs sat opposite each other.

"There you are," I looked up at the figure walking up to Jack, who was still unconscious. "I'm so glad I found you. No one is as determined as a mother trying to find her kid."

My heart dropped. My mother. My mother and her two other sons. It all clicked.

"You've all changed forms since I last saw you," I said.

"So have you," she replied. "Where'd you get this little suit?"

"None of your fucking business," I snapped.

Before another word could be said, I saw Jack shift in the chair across from me.

"Ooo," my mom grabbed their hair so she could tug their head up. "Look who joined the party. Tell me, (Y/n). Does Jack know your secret?"

They furrowed his eyebrows at me, "What?"

"They don't," my mom clapped and walked over to me.

She had a knife with a silver blade in her hand. She walked behind me and placed it near my neck. There were mere centimeters between the blade and my skin.

"Why don't you tell them," she asked. "Oh, I'm sure they'll love it."

I clenched my jaw.

"Tell them or I'll slit your throat and they'll get to watch, she snapped.

"Let (Y/n) go," Jack said. One of my brothers held a blade up to their neck.

"No," I yelled. I let out a deep breath. "I'm a shapeshifter."

"There it is," my mom cheered before circling me and kneeling in front of me. The knife was still by my throat. "And now that they will inevitably be disgusted by you, I have an offer. You can come back to us. Your family."

"I won't join your little game again," I snapped. "You hunted people for sport. I refuse to do that. I'm not evil. Not like you."

"You don't get it," she replied. "You don't have a choice. You either join us, or you watch us gut your little partner before we kill you."

I was stunned to silence. She moved and pressed the blade into my cheek. My breath hitched at the burning.

"No," I closed my eyes when Jack spoke.

"What do you say, sweetie?"

"I'll go," I answered. I wasn't going to let someone else die when I could easily protect them. "Just let them go."

She smirked at me, pulling the blade away and standing up. I made eye contact with Jack, ready to apologize, but I froze. Their eyes turned gold before they managed to pull their arms free, effectively snapping the rope that had been holding them.

I watched them send my mom and my brothers flying backward. Their eyes went back to normal as they moved to untie me.

"Are you okay," Jack asked. Their eyes were focused on the cut on my face. I nodded, still in shock.

Before I could ask any questions, the door to my apartment burst open. Two men came running in. Winchesters.

Jack's Dean was Dean... Winchester.

I also didn't get to question that before they shot my brothers.

I saw my mom shift and go for her blade. I ran to it and managed to get a hold of the handle before she could. I shoved her against the wall.

"You're just like me," she taunted. "Look at you. Blood-thirsty."

"I'm protecting someone I care about," I corrected. "I am not you."

I slammed the blade into her stomach and took a few steps back, letting her body fall.

Jack and I looked at each other for a minute. I went to jog over to them and hug them, but I froze when Dean pointed a gun at me. I held my hands up, staring at him.

"Dean," Jack said, eyebrows furrowed.

"They're a shifter, kid," Dean replied. "We can't trust them."

"I do," Jack moved to stand in front of Dean's gun. "They could've killed me at any time, but they didn't. They killed their mom to protect me."

"Dean, put down the gun," Sam said quietly.

I slowly stepped around Jack, giving Dean another clean shot at me.

"I know who you are," I shrugged. "You and your brother. So, I know damn well that you'll fulfill your end of the bargain here. I get you don't trust me. The moment I hurt or kill another person that isn't attacking me, you have my complete permission to shoot me straight in the heart. Deal?"

"No," Jack spoke up behind me. I reached back and grabbed their hand.

"Deal," I repeated.

"Deal," Dean answered, lowering his gun. I grinned.

"Not how I envisioned this going, but I'm Sam," Sam held a hand out to me. I shook his hand with the hand that wasn't holding Jack's. "Jack talks about you a lot."

"Oh," I looked down and blushed for a moment.

"The burgers are probably cold by now, but we were planning a movie night," he suggested. "If you still want to join us?"

"If you're alright with that," I nodded.

"Of course."

I felt Jack squeeze my hand as they stepped forward. They leaned over and kissed the side of my head.

"You two go wait outside," Dean instructed. "We'll handle this."

I nodded and let Jack lead me outside. We walked up to the impala parked by the curb and sat in the backseat.

"Jack," I asked after a moment of silence. "Your eyes. I... I feel it's fair for me to ask because you know what I am now, so... what are you?"

Jack froze up and looked down for a moment.

"Jack," I stepped forward. I leaned over and kissed their cheek before moving over to kiss the corner of their mouth. "Whatever it is, I won't judge you. I just want to know you."

"My dad," they explained. "My real dad... is Lucifer and my mom was human."

I blinked at them a few times. I wasn't upset. Just overwhelmed.

"I'm not like him though," they continued. "I don't want to be like him."

I nodded, "Okay."

"You're okay with this," they asked.

"Jack, if you were anything like him, I would know by now," I shrugged. "I don't care as long as you're a good person."

They grinned, "I don't care that you're a shifter either."

"Good, I'd have a few comments if you did," I chuckled.

"You guys ready," I both jumped a little as Dean jumped into the driver's seat.

"Ready," Jack replied. Sam got into the passenger seat.

As Dean started the car, I looked up at my apartment building. I knew that one day, my family would try to track me down. I had just been hoping that I could've kept Jack from being involved in that.

Now that I had faced those monsters with Jack and won, I felt free. No matter what could come at me now, I didn't feel overwhelmed. It was new and beautiful.

---------------------------------

Masterlist

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)

Maisie Peters - “You Signed Up for This” Writing Challenge Masterlist

[0aurelion-sol0]

(Mostly) short thoughts (& review) about Season 4 Vol. 1:

I finally finished Season 4 and after letting it sink in, I'm extremely perplexed and have confused & complex feelings about this season.

As I've predicted, no one is really satistfied by it, so far, unless you ignore completely certain elements and storylines based on your own biases and interests. That, too me, speaks of the Duffers trying too much and not doing a lot in the end.

The story is so spread out that certain characters and storylines feel completely disconnected from one another which may render it hard to follow sometimes because this is such a different kind of storytelling for Stranger Things that usually keep it's story more contained, unlike here where the writers decides to spread their storylines and characters as much as they can.

It's also extremely inconsistent, the writing is not always on point on many levels. Just in one storyline you can change from a great scene to a boring one in a heartbeat. Not all episodes are very strong and the hype around certain episodes such as 4 & 7 are built purely on certain scenes and story arcs rather than the episode in themselves.

I consider 3 & 5, stronger and more well written episodes than 4 & 7 for example.

There's even characters we do not see through entire episodes and you really wonder why no scene of them were able to be put in there considering the huge runtime of certain episodes.

This season also relies on a lot of convenient things to make the story happen which doesn't feel organic in any way sometimes. Why haven't we heard of this before ? When exactly did this happen really and why is this character or thing here ? How was this character able to do that now but we never heard he could do that ? Don't bother wondering that, we got a story to move.

Some of the new characters can be endearing but in a cast that's already very crowded, they feel like an afterthought. One character named Patrick dies without any really exploration of his trauma which when the first two victims of the villain were white, and he is black and their trauma are given huge screentime, it stings a little bit.

Speaking of him. The new villain is extremely generic and is only interesting in some moments in his monster form, his backstory is painfully lame and corny and doesn't feel well prepared. He comes a bit out of nowhere in the overall story of ST and you really wonder how everything connected to that character has not been shown or hinted at more prominently before. He is not really interesting and his motivations feels a bit too meta at some point.

They try to give him some form of complexity but the writers and the narrative only make him one dimensional and a born evil bad guy because they don't really bother going in detail with him and what he went through. Overall, as I have again predicted, he is extremely dissapointing and he doesn't really add much to ST as a whole and feels more like fanservice for certain type of fans rather than a true creation from the Duffers. And again, some inconsistencies are there too.

It also feels like the writers are trying to force Eleven to have this bigger and larger than life connection with the UD when if you really rewatch ST, there wasn't really any and given they brought her back from the dead at the end of Season 1, they needed her to do something after stopping her Season 2 development & for the rest of the series . Plus it doesn't work with what's been established in Season 1 to 3. Mostly Season 1 & 2.

There's also inconsistencies with certain explanations that are given during the season when put with the other seasons. Like the lights or what happens in the Rainbow Room (El's past as a whole), to the point some of these feel more like badly thought out Reddit theories than a good explanation for the mysteries of the show.

The writers are trying to give us some development between the characters & relationships but don't attack the real issues that are at the core of them, & that they have brought up and have started their arc with themselves since Season 1 such as Lucas or Will. But in the end, they seem to care more about the next big event than spending time with the characters.

Not everything is to throw away of course, there's a lot of great things about it such as certain story arcs, revelations and moments but I think it's my least favorite so far and the least well written.

However I find it the most funny yet. The humor actually works and is very clever at times. The actors are all playing their part very well & even if certain characters do not interest me, I still feel engaged because of them and what they do, the cinematography is nice and the money is here but something is not clicking and is missing.

Season 3 was what it was but it stayed that and played it's concept to it's full potential. It also felt more organic, well structured and connected to the two first seasons than this one who is deeply trying to be connected to those but doesn't always succeed. And is consistent within itself unlike Season 4.

I feel like people are ignoring obvious flaws because it doesn't have the over-campiness of Season 3 and goes "dark" in some places but it suffers from the same flaws if not more flaws than Season 3 too me. And some loves that the show is giving them everything they've been begging for despite it not making a lot of sense in the end.

My ranking of the storylines so far would be:

1. Russia. Prison Break group.

2. Hawkins.

3. California/SBP Van Gang.

4. El's storyline.

I'm not too eager to watch Vol. 2 but it remains engaging enough to be entertained & wanting to know what happens next but from a show who gave me literal goosebumps in 1&2, I feel let down by what it's becoming and what it's becoming.

Asks are open for those who wants to discuss about certain things. :)

I'll try to put the more in depth reviews for the episodes before Vol. 2 but don't expect too much from that. I'll still try though but I know myself. X) There will still be the smaller posts about the season & the show though, in between and sometimes.

Let me know if there's something missing or a fault in my writing that you have noticed and that I missed after checking. ;)

[whateverthedragonswant]

what's your interpretation of the way oliver reacted to the episode, seems to me he hates bucktaylor. if i was a fan of a couple and one of the actors was this openly against the pairing i'd start worrying that the couple won't last. I personally think BT will break up in 5B.

Hey, Nonnie! Hmmm, I have tbh I didn't know Oliver had posted those stories until you mentioned it in this ask. I just took a look and I could be wrong, but if I had to guess, I would say it could be one of two things: 1) Buck is not interacting with Eddie or Christopher in the way that he has in the past two seasons (I'm not saying that everything is about Buddie or Buddipher when it comes to this show but this was majorly important for Buck's character as well as Eddie's and Christopher's). There's still very much a disconnect which I personally think is because they're making Buck go through the same thing they made Eddie go through in the beginning of the season. Or 2) Buck is repeating history in a way and while it doesn't undo the character development of the last two seasons, and he did show some growth this episode (by putting his foot down with Taylor when he found out she was flying somewhere), it still does feel a bit like 'okay, here we go again' and the carousel music starts.

Tbf to Oliver, it could be any number of things he's reacting to, and I don't really know too much about him outside of this show, but if I had to guess, I would think it's one of those two things, quite possibly the latter one. I don't know if he hates the BT ship per se, but he may not be a fan of it just because what it seems to represent for his character that he cares very deeply about. I think "Last Dance" was chosen very purposely for the "I love you" from Taylor as well as the revealing dialogue of Buck not knowing all of Taylor's secrets and then they run up to bed after.

I think that scene spoke very loudly actually because it's almost as if they chose to show us Buck and Taylor running up to the bedroom after to indicate not only that they were now getting back to the sexual phase of their relationship while also laying a new emotional foundation for it, but also that there are still mysteries about her so to speak. Mysteries that maybe Buck still wants to figure out.

But they also made sure to show us the contrast in the dynamics between BT and Buddie in this episode. The 118 knows Buck's romantic history (outside of Ravi who is hearing it for the first time) and Eddie pretty much stays out of it but laughs along and even busts Buck's chops. No secrets from Eddie or the 118. Then Buck teases Eddie about watching telenovelas with Christopher which Eddie defensively confirms. No secrets about Eddie, from Buck.

Plus, we also get this smile from Buck once Eddie says "We watch it to practice our Spanish":

That is a genuine Buck smile right there (as we all know), barely able to be contained.

And we also get this smile when Eddie teases him about the hair washing excuse Buck mentioned women use on him:

So to go back to your question, Nonnie, I am willing to bet (with my very limited knowledge tbf) that it is definitely something relating to Buck's character for this episode and his development. And it may or may not have to do with Eddie, Christopher, or both. The series has completely interwoven Eddie's and Christopher's stories with Buck's so complexly, that there's no way those threads aren't being affected when it comes to something like Buck's growth and development, even if it's his relationship with Taylor and where Buck goes from there with that.

And I completely agree with you, a breakup is coming. Not only because we saw for the first eight episodes (or however many Taylor was in) just how disconnected they were as a couple, even before they started to hint at Taylor's back story and that she was keeping something hidden from Buck about it, but also because with this I love you, with this entire episode, something still feels off regarding the relationship, right down to Buck's reaction to the declaration.

Buck said it himself in 5x02 "That's not how you talk about someone you're in love with". And in that 118 truck scene tonight, even though he was at a crossroads and needed advice which Bobby gave, that's not how you talk about someone you're in love with or a relationship you want to stay in. Which is exactly why we get Eddie's little sarcastic "Yeah, who does that?" And then these reactions:

Eddie knows. He may not know how Buck truly feels on some other things, but he definitely knows that this BT relationship isn't going to last. That line of Eddie's isn't just meant to be a callback to us as the audience to that 5x02 scene but also to show us that Buck is making a very similar mistake. He told Eddie basically to crap or get off the pot with Ana; Buck needs to do the same with Taylor. And the ending of this episode wasn't Buck making that decision, at all. He still needs to make it.

I know a lot of people hope BT breaks up in 5x10 but I'm not sure it will happen that quickly. Not now that there has been an emotional foundation laid for Buck and Taylor as a romantic couple. I think like you said, it will come in 5B. But I truly don't see that relationship lasting into season 6. They're forcing Buck to examine things a little too closely the past few episodes when it comes to Taylor. And the fact that yes, Buck tried to get Taylor to stay this episode, but literally in this truck scene accepted that a breakup was headed his way until Bobby bops him on the head? That's very telling. He wasn't destroyed or worried about it like he had been with Abby and Ali. It not only shows his growth but also shows the audience one big thing: 'don't get too attached to this relationship because Buck doesn't appear to be that invested'. Especially with Hen's line of "Abby, Ali, they don't rhyme with Taylor, that has to be a good sign, right?" He was invested with Abby. He was invested with Ali. He's not invested in Taylor. He cares about her, wants to be there for her, but he's not in love with her. It's all right there in the dialogue and in this season. BT is about to go through what EA did, just not sure what episode it will come to a head on.

So, Nonnie, my very long answer to your question is I think if Oliver was reacting this way to the episode then it has to do with Buck and his story. Because regardless of whether he likes BT or despises it, one thing is for sure, while BT is most likely important for Buck's story to continue getting him to where he needs to be (just like Ana with Eddie), it really does leave the viewer watching it with a sense of 'um, okay? this kind of feels like a waste of time, tho? like do what you gotta do but um, can we actually see Buck's story like move?' And Buck choosing to stay in a relationship he's not 100% invested in (again, "I think we kind of live together, we never explicitly discussed it") isn't really moving Buck's story forward, except maybe in one big way, which ends up feeling like the dance we as the audience have been doing with Buck over and over again.

Thank you for the ask, Nonnie! I hope you have a wonderful rest of your night! <3

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 2x8 thoughts

I am so lucky that the creators of Ted Lasso decided to make this entire show specifically for me. #blessed

If last week felt like a bit of breathing room (albeit tense, poignant, character-progressing breathing room) with distinct narrative lines, this week’s episode was a chaotic yet tightly-written swirl of pain and hope and sadness! No neat subject headers for this one, y’all. Just my brain and heart in the inadequate form of a bulleted list. It is the medium available to me at this time.

I am going to remember the moment when Ted calls Sharon and tells her his father killed himself for the rest of my life.

(I could say a bunch of stuff about his face and what he says and how he tries to hide his tears from Beard right after and how insanely much I adore this character and ahhhhhhhh but I’m just going to leave that scene there in our collective memories.)

Jamie. JAMIE. Higgins has given some great advice about love on this show, but his musings about his up-and-down relationship with his own father were not helpful in the context of Jamie’s dad, who is an abusive piece of shit. I really adore that all of the main AFC Richmond staff members are realistically a bit hit-or-miss with their advice and life philosophies (some are mostly miss this season, of course).

And I am completely in awe of the moment when Jamie punches his father. The way he just stands there after Beard kicks his dad out of the locker room. The way you can hear a pin drop. And Roy—Roy who is learning in so many areas of his life about his influence on people, learning that the things he needs aren’t necessarily the same as the things other people need—is the one to cross the room and hug him. Hold him, really, with the tenderness Ted used when he hugged Rebecca outside the gala in 1x4. God.

I’ve thought a lot about how s1 was about giving people a soft place to land. There’s always an angel there when you need one. There’s always an opportunity to be kind. If you look for someone, you find them. If you look for the good in someone, you find the good. And as everyone works through their individual journeys in s2, that can’t always be the case anymore. But there are still so many moments of angels on this show, and it’s not about chance and serendipity and fate [not that it was about that in s1] but about the effort it takes to become someone who can be there for someone else. Or who can be there for yourself. I’m so proud of Jamie for physically fighting back against his father. I’m so proud of Roy for being the one who recognized what Jamie needed.

I have every feeling in the world about how Ted is almost totally frozen both times (s1 and s2) he witnesses Jamie’s father abusing him. In s1, he was still there for Jamie after, and I have every reason to believe he’ll be there for Jamie after this incident as well, but that frozen stance HURTS. He’s in so deep with his pain about his own father that it’s like he physically cannot snap out of it to act in the moment. It seems entirely outside of his control, and it breaks my heart, because Ted wants so badly to be a good father, a good coach, a good friend, a good partner, a good patient. He’s there for people in all kinds of ways, even in his current less-than-capable state. He takes care of Sharon post-concussion and even gets her a new bike! During the disastrous match at Wembley his coaching is ineffectual and everything is chaos but he’s the last one standing on the pitch! But this really awful thing keeps happening to Jamie and Ted is just…frozen in the face of it. Like one of those nightmares where you’re running in place.

The frozen-in-place nightmare also kind of applies to the way the total separation between Ted and Rebecca feels, too. I have never for a moment doubted the writers’ intentions in setting these characters up as soulmates on parallel journeys, and I’m actually really digging (on a story level) how disconnected they are right now. It is IMPRESSIVE that their absence in each other’s lives feels like such a glaring loss, one we cannot forget even as there are so many other things happening onscreen. It is 100% not just shipper goggles making me process information about Ted while thinking about Rebecca and information about Rebecca while thinking about Ted. I know there are a lot of really angry and frustrated people in the fandom right now (both T/R shippers and T/R antis and non-shipping fans who don’t get why s2 is different from s1) and while I understand being frustrated by choices characters make, and frustrated by the feelings the show makes us feel that we just want to feel more of or less of, I continue to agree with pretty much every narrative choice happening right now.

Agreeing with the narrative like this?! This is such a unique experience for me as a viewer—to feel like I’m on a ride that is at once absolutely wild and incredibly sensible and well-crafted, and to feel simultaneously completely invested and anticipatory and speculative but also totally willing to trust where it goes. I long for Ted and Beard to really talk. I long for Ted and Rebecca to stop missing each other. I long for Roy to have a serious conversation with Ted about what’s happening with him. I long for Keeley to find a vocation, something that drives her beyond her projects. I long for so many things! But I wouldn’t long for them if this show was less good. If the show was less good, I wouldn’t have a wish list a mile long because I wouldn’t be so attuned to the details and potential lurking in every scene. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SHOW, I CANNOT HANDLE IT, I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

(To that end, a great deal of the Ted Lasso tag and so many Twitter reactions reactions to the show feel super stressful right now and I am kind of just trying not to look?! I love this fandom so much because of the amazing conversations that happen and because of brilliant fic and because there are some awesome people I never would have encountered were it not for this show. That little bubble is wonderful and I’d stay in this fandom no matter what in order to keep experiencing those things. But fans’ catastrophic reactions to every little thing that happens, every little choice a character makes that isn’t the “perfect” choice? The takeaway that the writers—on this show of all shows—wake up in the morning ready for another day of torturing shippers rather than another day of writing a beautiful story they genuinely want to write? I do not enjoy those parts at all. I would like to opt out of those parts. I’m having such a magical experience watching this show and talking about this show and listening about this show and writing about this show with a variety of people who feel all kinds of ways. I truly wish I could somehow transfer the energy of this experience onto all the people who are hating it right now. I don’t mind at all that people are having vastly different reactions to this show and are sharing their honest feelings, including the really angry ones (I can appreciate something and disagree with it!), and I get that sometimes the language of fannish reactions is intentionally, ironically hyperbolic. But there feels like this very serious trend of people legitimately thinking writers on this show are targeting shippers and have lost respect for their characters, and I just feel like an alien from another planet when I see that stuff. I guess I just feel like people make art because they want their art to be visible to other people and to themselves, but that doesn’t typically involve specifically catering to or torturing a subset of that audience?)

I am more fascinated by Sharon Fieldstone than ever before. I have been running through every single action with her and Ted so many times. The confirmation that she’s living in club-provided housing (that could not look more different from Ted’s club-provided flat). Ted clearly noticing the many bottles. Sharon’s face while she tries to casually recycle them. (Sharon could legitimately have a more problematic relationship with alcohol than Ted does, and I find that extremely interesting and am very curious to find out what happens there.) Sharon leaving him voice notes while she’s concussed, probably because she’d been thinking about him shortly before the accident. The way Ted calls her and does all the funny voices and it’s not frustrating like all the times he uses his silliness and allusions to deflect during their prior conversations because this time, those behaviors are just a part of him showing care for another person. The way they stretch each other, and Ted is still wrong about the things he’s been wrong about, but they both grow all the same.

While it is pretty much impossible for me to imagine that this show would include an actual romantic relationship between Ted and Sharon (it would be beyond unethical even if they could write it well, and Sharon in particular is so professional and committed to her work, and it would erase so much of the powerful message about the importance of seeking therapy from a professional who is not your friend or partner, and I would totally hate it), watching this episode was the first moment I had this queasy little feeling that it’s possible that Ted could end up developing really complicated feelings about Sharon since, at this point, he’s been honest with her about things he’s hardly spoken about before and you can really form an attachment to people you feel safe with in a new way. (I mean, I’m sure Michelle knows what happened with Ted’s father, but I’m not even certain if Beard does.) He’s so broken right now, and Sharon is such a great person and so different from anyone else in his life (even though Rebecca is also different, and Beard is also different, and Roy is also different, and so on), that I could see things getting really fuzzy for him. I continue to have faith in the way the storylines on this show are handled. I’m just. Putting this here.

(In saying that, though, I also wanna make it really clear that I don’t just automatically assume anytime a new female character is introduced that they’re going to end up becoming a romantic complication. Like, Phoebe is allowed to have a teacher who is an attractive woman and AFC Richmond is allowed to have a sports psychologist who is an attractive woman and Keeley is allowed to talk to Jamie Tartt without it threatening what she has with Roy and all these people can exist as human beings without the introduction of romantic drama.)

Isaac gives every player one haircut per season, OH MY GOD. The JOY during the haircut scene. YES.

KEELEY AND REBECCA. Their text thread. The affirming video call right before Rebecca goes into the restaurant. The way Keeley sits all snuggled up against Rebecca in her office.

I was pretty thoroughly spoiled for the Sam and Rebecca plot through 2x8, and I was bracing for something far more problematic and tortured than what happens in this episode. The words I would use to describe their scenes: awkward, cute, cringy, and understandable. There are a million reasons why this relationship isn’t sustainable, but I felt completely understanding of both their choices here. This show has a lot of thesis statements, but I keep going back to the idea from 2x1 that there are people who enter your life to help you get to the next point, and I think it’s entirely possible that Sam and Rebecca will mutually be that for each other.

I find comparisons between Rupert and Rebecca super upsetting. There are absolutely meaningful things to say about the irony of ending up in a situation with an uncomfortable resemblance to certain taboo elements of an ex’s situation. But that ex is abusive and manipulative and cruel and Rebecca has exhibited NONE of those behaviors, and it makes me really sad to think that people feel that the writers on this show have betrayed Rebecca in giving her this storyline.

As always, I reserve the right to keep blathering about this show. I’ve had a headache for a couple of days, but my head is also so full of 2x8 thoughts that I couldn’t keep them in even if the circumstances for writing this were not ideal. I kind of hate that I’ve included frustrated fandom thoughts within the analysis of what I felt was an absolutely gorgeous, complicated, heartbreaking, near-perfect episode of television, but if ya can’t be a little dramatic on your own tumblr while you’re feeling raw and under the weather, where can ya?