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darnell-la · 5 months ago

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𝗪𝗵𝘆? 𝗬𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹

pairing: protective!rafe cameron x druggie!pogue!reaser

warning: drug abuse, alcohol abuse, drugged, assaults mentioned (not Rafe), hair pulling, slapping, mean pet names, etc.

note: we love a dark, mean, or overprotective Rafe Cameron, but author “S” decided to write a sweet Rafe towards a pogue.

follow our Instagram @ darnell.la so we can start posting random videos, photos, edits, and memes of the people we write about!

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𝟯𝗥𝗗 𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡 𝗣𝗢𝗩

Being a Pogue isn’t easy. Most Kooks say they get off and get whatever they want because their island focuses more on the Pogues. That’s easy for someone to say who gets money consistently every week.

Y/n works at the golf bar, serving people who hate her. Most of the time, she doesn’t get a tip, but if she does, it’s a big amount for a group of kids who want to show how much they have versus her.

Being on the island is cruel, and the only thing y/n feels is worth her time, is sitting at the beach, getting high and drunk anytime she can.

“Just need a few grams pre-rolled,” y/n said as she walked through Barry’s trailer. “Gave you a lil extra since my last client pissed me off. Same price, don’t worry about the rest,” Barry said before hanging y/n a bag.

Y/n left Barry’s trailer and headed to work. Today was going to be a rough day. It was a Friday, and everyone came here towards the end of the day because of the weekend.

“Hey, y/n! — Could you handle that table over there?” Y/n’s boss asked, and before looking, she said “Yes,”. Anything he asked for, she’d do for the extra tips he usually gives her from the tip jar overnight.

“Hey, guys! I’ll be your waitress for the night. My name is y/n, and I’m here for whatever you need,” Y/n fumbled her notepad, a bit nervous to cover a huge table of teen boys who usually treat her bad.

“Didn’t know they had pretty Pogue’s,” a boy said. Y/n looked up, finally getting a better look at their faces. She knew them all from school. Some are in every class she takes.

“Oh shit, you’re that Pogue with all A’s. Hey, girl!” A dude said. You smiled with a nod, not really wanting to talk. “Let’s order,” a boy that she noticed right away. Rafe Cameron.

Everyone knows how he feels about Pogues. He fights them. Embarrassed them. Steals from them. She had to stay nice today before he made something up to get her fired. She didn’t know what he was capable of tonight.

“And make sure to do it snappy, dirty princess,” a boy said before y/n walked off with all of their orders. The comment didn’t bother her, since she’s heard worse.

“Isn’t she like top of the class?” Rafe randomly asked, interrupting his friend’s conversations. “Yeah, why?” Topper asked. “Why is she here? Workin’ as a waiter,” he asked, knowing these jobs are for the lowest.

“She’s still a Pogue. Heard they don’t cover her stay at the dorms, so she stays at her dump,” Kelce said, making the table laugh. Rafe chuckled but felt off doing so.

He saw her earlier today, leaving Barry’s trailer. He was curious if they were fucking, so he asked him when he came for his usual order. “I wish,” was Barry’s response.

If she was any other Pogue, he would’ve known they were there for drugs, but her? She didn’t seem like the type. Top of her class and knew what she was doing. Why was a girl like her drugging up?

Throughout the night, y/n was moving back and forth between tables. Luckily, more tables than usual tipped her.

She thought this was finally going to be a good night until the Rafe’s table got drunk. They began making noises, throwing shots at y/n every time she walked past or served them more drinks.

She didn’t notice, but Rafe was the only one who didn’t say anything. His friends tried to convince him, but he said he “wasn’t in the mood,”.

“Ayo!? — Where’s my beer?” A Timothy asked. Y/n quickly made his drink and ran over to serve. “Took you long enough. Might take a dollar or two off your tip,” he said as the table chuckled.

“I’m sorry, I was pretty busy-“ she tried explaining herself. “Doing what? Stealing. Oh, shit, people! Check your pockets!” He shouted, embarrassing her, but she tried her best not to show it.

“Sorry, it won’t happen again,” she said. Seconds later, the boy pulled y/n onto his lap. “Let’s hope not, or you’ll have to make up for it, hm?” He said. Y/n wanted to slap him, but she couldn’t. She’s never been in a position like this.

“Right, princess?” He asked in her ear as his hands traveled her body. “Y-Yes sir,” she stuttered as the table laughed but Rafe. “How about you take a break and stay here with us. Talk about yourself,” Kelce suggested.

“Yeah, do that,” Timothy focused on her curves as she shook in embarrassment and lack of comfort. “I-I wish, but I can’t. I have other tables,” she said, moving to leave, but Timothy tightened his grip on her.

“But Ian done with you yet,” he said. Of course, his friends found it funny. Y/n tried pushing his hands off of her respectfully and leaving, but he didn’t like that. “Kinda hot when a Pogue resists,” he said before sniffing and lightly kissing her neck.

Y/n yelled as she strongly pushed off of him. “C’mon, baby-“ he went to reach for her but she quickly gave him a punch to his face, causing him to fall out of his chair. He was drunk and it was unexpected.

“Hey!” His Friends said as they got up. Even Rafe. “The fuck is your problem!” Another friend yelled at her, pushing her to the ground roughly.

“Hey, hey! — What’s going on here?” Y/n’s boss asked as Y/n got up. “This Pogue punched me!” Timothy said. “What!? You fuckin’ touched me without permission!” Y/n yelled back.

“It was a joke you crazy bitch,” Timothy touched his lip, feeling an open cut. “I’m bleeding! Is this what you hire!?” He yelled, shocking the boss. “You basically sexually assaulted me!” Y/n yelled.

“Barley, you freak. Why would I want something like you? A fuckin’ Pogue!” He yelled, aching y/n’s stomach. How could someone do what he did, and then talk to you like you meant nothing.

“Y/n, go home,” her boss spoke. “But-“ she tried saying. “Go home! Take the rest of the week off,” he said. Kelce and some of the rest laughed, knowing that would fuck with her income. Getting paid all week wasn’t great for her.

Y/n stormed out of her job in anger, pissed off that the Kooks always get what they want. Her boss has cameras, and he didn’t think twice about looking. This was bullshit!

It’s been hours since y/n got home. She couldn’t help but drink and light a couple to ease her mind. She was overthinking and hurt. What if she lost her job? How could she possibly live decently?

On the other hand, Rafe got into a fight with Timothy after he brought up the fact he made sure to talk to her boss and tell him if she came back, he’d sue the place.

Rafe was disgusted. He started the whole situation and ended it like some bitch. Y/n had been nice to the table all night, and he repaid her like that? No. He didn’t like that one bit.

“How could you choose a Pogue over your homies!?” Timothy had yelled at him before Rafe left. Rafe didn’t know got to answer, but he knew this wasn’t right. Something in him saw the real struggle of a Pogue that he’d never paid attention to before.

It’s early in the morning. Y/n’s awake and Rafe is at her front door. He quickly knocked, needing to talk to her about last night.

Y/m groaned, hoping this wasn’t one of her friends. They know she’s unavailable before 12pm. “What!?” She dragged before opening the door to face with a Kook. A Kook at her door was new.

“What do you want?” She asked, slightly closing the door. She didn’t know what he was here for. “Are you seriously high? At this hour?” Rafe asked, feeling anger run through his body instantly.

“Why do you care? Not like you don’t snort white dust every night,” she said. “I’ve been clean. For 2 years,” she said with a straight face. Y/n felt horrible. Why would she bring someone else’s addictions up?

“I — I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ she tried apologizing. “It’s okay,” he genuinely said. “But what’s not okay, is you high at this time of day. That’s not good for you,” he said, making her roll her eyes. Who is he to tell her what she should do.

“What did you come here for?” She asked, not wanting to talk to Rafe Cameron about her drug life. What if he used it against her. “To apologize for my friend. Had to teach him a lesson last night,” y/n said, confused.

Rafe lifted his hands, causing y/n to flinch. She soon realized he was trying to show her his knuckles. He had to beat Timothy good.

“Oh my god, Rafe!” She said. “Nah uh — Why the fuck did you flinch?” Rafe asked, feeling so much confusion that was covering his anger. “I-I don’t know,” she said. “Does someone beat you or some shit?” He asked as he looked passed her for any signs of a partner.

“Were you beat?” He asked. “God, no, Rafe. I was just- I thought you were gonna hit me,” she said. “Why would I hit you!?” He slightly shouted. “I don’t know! Maybe because you fight JJ and John B any second you get!” Y/n yelled in his face.

Rafe wasn’t expecting this morning to go like this. He came to apologize. Hope he could learn more about her, but now he sees how she sees him. As another Timothy.

“Look, y/n — I’ve been done with that for years. Plus, I’ve never hit a woman in my life. I came here to have a decent conversation with you, that’s all,” Rafe spoke.

“Well, I’m not up for speaking. Needa figure out how to make money since I woke up to an email, firing me from my one and only job,” she said, slightly mad at him, but only because he’s a Kook.

“I can help you,” he said, making her scoff. “No — No way Ima let some Kook, better yet, Rafe Cameron help me get a job because he sees me as some weak girl,” she said, about to close her front door, but he pushed it open, all the way.

“Y/n, I’m trying to help you. Can you not see that?” He asked. “No, I can’t! All you do is lie and-“ she tried continuing. “That was years ago! Just because you haven’t changed, doesn’t mean I couldn’t!” He yelled in her face.

The two were silent. Y/n was silenced. He was right, and she knew that. Why is she blaming a random Kook for her lifestyle? She’s the one who uses up her money for drugs. Not him. Her.

“Bye, Rafe,” y/n said in a low soft voice as she closed her front door. Rafe’s mouth opened, but he didn’t know what to say. Why would he yell at her life that? He knows how he used to feel when people yelled at him and he was hooked on drugs.

Fast forward to the weekend. Y/n’s outside on some Kook’s house party patio, smoking a joint while she made conversation with Barry.

She hadn’t been to a Kook party in months, but now that she’s unemployed, she had time. Barry also offered her a free supply if she came tonight, so she did.

Dressed in a tight sundress she bought herself last year. She knew she looked good. She hated going to parties, and looking like a Pogue, even though people already knew who she was.

“Needa make my rounds. See ya inside?” Barry said before leaving her outside to smoke alone. Y/n took a drag of her joint before walking her head back. She felt great. Being broke was finally out of her mind.

“Unemployed princess is here? What a surprise. Haven’t seen you at one of these in a while,” Timothy spoke as he came from behind her. Her mood was instantly ruined.

“Could you like, piss off? You’ve done enough in my life,” y/n said, going to take another drag until one of his friends slapped it out of her hand.

“Hey!” She went to get up until Timothy pushed her back onto the couch. Hard. “Don’t get feisty. No one’s here to save your ass,” he said, pointing to the big crowd that wasn’t paying attention to them. He and she knew they wouldn’t help her. She’s a Pogue after all.

“Look — I just want to have a relaxing night. I’m sorry for slapping you-“ she said. “Punching,” Kelce interrupted. “Yeah — Punched, and that shit hurt,” Timothy said before grabbing a fist full of her hair.

“Have you ever been punched in the face, Pogue? Because I could show ya,” he said as y/n stayed still. What would she possibly do? His grip was hard. She felt pain through their whole scalp.

“But actually, — You’re too pretty, for that. Maybe apologize instead,” he suggested. “I-I’m sorry. I won’t do-“ she tried saying. “Nah uh — Not that kind of apology,” Timothy’s hand traced down to his crotch before he gripped it, giving her his idea.

His friends laughed as she looked at him in disgust and shock. Out here? In front of anyone? What kind of human is he?

“No way,” she said, moving to get up but he quickly slapped her across her face, causing her to fall onto the couch she was sitting on.

“Goddamn Pogue,” he spoke as he climbed into her, quickly tugging on her dress. Y/n screamed and kicked as his friends stood around, laughing and drinking at the sight of their friend trying to assault her once again.

Rafe had seen the scene a while ago. As soon as he saw the group walk up to her, he made his way towards them. He was sadly across the yard, talking to Topper, so he couldn’t stop the slap Timothy gave her.

He knew when he got over to them, he’d go off. How dare he mess with her after he told him not to last night.

“Piece of fucking shit,” Rafe said as he pulled the boy off of y/n and instantly threw a punch to his face. “Oh shit,” one of the boys shouted, making people look their way. Finally.

“What did I say?” Rafe asked before giving him a punch. “Told you to leave her alone, didn’t I, huh? Didn’t I!?” He punched again. “Told you what would happen if I caught you near her again, didn’t I?” Rafe kept lunching.

Y/n grabbed her bag and ran off, pushing through the group in embarrassment. The dress was ripped, and her bar was on display. Her tits even showed a bit. She had to get away.

The poor girl ran to the beach to get away from the human noises. She needed something to block out her thoughts. Their voices.

She thought the waves would help, but it didn’t. The waves were very loud, but the thoughts were louder. He was going to use her. He ripped at her clothes, and no one helped. People watched. Laughed. Talked. No one helped.

Y/n threw her bag to the ground and scattered through it, trying to find a blunt Barry he’d just given to her. She needed something. Badly.

She quickly grabbed one and lit it with a drag, rushing the smoke into her lungs until it burned. She coughed but felt better. She always does, until she doesn’t.

Y/n kept taking drags, noticing the taste was different, but who cares. As long as this shit gets her what she needs.

“Y/n!?” Rafe yelled out as he ran the way she ran. After he was done with Timothy, he told Topper who ran over to the scene, to call the cops on him. He needed to be thrown away for what he did to y/n.

“Y/n!?” Rafe basically screamed, needing to know where she was. Why did she run this way? Towards the water? At night? That’s dangerous. What if she somehow got in the water and drowned? He needed to find her.

“Y/n!” He continued yelling by/n could hear him, but her kind was so where else. His voice and the waves were going through her kind like crazy, but she curled up and ignored them.

He blunt, lighter, and bag laid next to her curled body. She felt different. She felt like everything was attacking her at once. She could feel his hands on her and people encouraging his actions.

“Why the hell y/n,” Rafe ran across the girl and dropped to his knees. “Y/n - Y/n!” He pulled her to sit on her up to sit. Her eyes were closed and she shook her head.

“D-Don’t — Please! I-I’ll do better!” She cried out. “Oh my god,” Rafe looked at her, feeling pain in his heart. She was beyond fucked in the head. He remembers how it felt.

“We gotta get you out of here,” Rafe said as he put out her blunt and then put it and the lighter in her bag. He threw the bag over his shoulders and tightened the straps before throwing y/n over his own shoulder. It took a lot, but he got it done.

“S-Sorry, sorry! — I’m so sorry!” She cried out. Rafe’s eyes filled with tears. What is she thinking right now? Does she think he’ll hurt her? He hated the thought of that. He’d never do that.

On the way to Rafe’s dorm, y/n was knocked out. He watched her all night, and she didn’t drink or smoke enough to be like this.

Rafe searched through her bag after he parked, to take a look at her blunt he saw Barry give her. He never trusted Barry, and he was right not to.

He could see the mixture of hashish and some Xani bars crushed into her roll-up. “He’s so fuckin’ dead,” Rafe said to himself. He’ll be sending the cops after him too.

Y/n is now in Rafe’s bed, sound asleep. He changed her into his T-shirt and shorts so she’d be comfortable. He didn’t want her waking up in the dress some Kook ripped at.

Y/n woke up later the next day. Her mind was fuzzy, but she felt fine. She felt like she’s gotten the best sleep she’s ever had.

The girl went to go back to sleep until she remembered she never made it back to her bed. Whose bed is she in?

Y/n slowly turned around in the bed, noticing someone was next to her. When she finally saw the man, her heart dropped. What did she do?

“Rafe,” y/n said as her heart began to pound. She didn’t know what she was feeling, but her body did. She was stunned.

Rafe groaned as he turned towards y/n. His eyes were closed because he was still in his sleep. “Fuck,” she said low, trying to think of what she should do. She can’t wake up and have a normal conversation with Rafe. In Rafe bed. In Rafe Cameron’s fucking bed.

Y/n took her time but managed to get out of bed without waking him up. That’s when she noticed she had his clothes on. God, this isn’t looking good for her.

Y/n slowly tipped-toed to Rafe’s room door, pulling in the handle but it wouldn’t open. She pulled hard and noticed a keyhole. With a missing key. Did he lock the door?

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Rafe spoke, making y/n jump. “Fuck, I — Hey! Hey,” she said, pushing her body up against his door. She was in his dorm. This day was getting worse by the second.

“Why don’t you come back over here and lay down. Was a long night last night,” he said. Y/n tried thinking of the night, but nothing was clicking. Not one thing until her eyes landed on her dress on his desk.

Her ripped dress. The dress that Timothy ripped when he tried groping her last night. The dress people watch gets tugged on while they watch.

“O-Oh my god, her heart skipped a breath as she spoke. Y/n placed her hand on her chest, trying to calm herself down. Rafe noticed and quickly got up and ran towards her.

“Nah uh, c’mere,” Rafe slowly walked y/n to his bed until she was sat. “Don’t stress — Nothing happened. I finished the job. You won’t ever have to worry about him again,” Rafe said, trying to calm her down.

“B-But-“ she tried saying. “Nah uh, no buts. I got it. I got you. You’re safe and sound. I won’t ever let him or anyone hurt you again,” he said. “Including yourself, so we’re gonna have to figure out this drinking and smoking problem,” he said as she looked at him.

“Yep, and it’s gonna be easy. You have me and-“ she went to say. “T-That’s not possible. Rehab costs money and — And I’m broke,” she said as tears streamed down her face. So much hit her head.

“Hey — Baby. I’ve got you, I said. I’m gonna pay for you, and you’re gonna get clean in no time,” Rafe said, but y/n’s mind stopped at the name he called her. Baby?

“Baby?” She asked. “Yes, a-and I know that confuses you. Fuck — It confused me, but I can’t just watch you ruing yourself. I refuse,” he said like he’s been her friend for years.

“B-But I need it,” she said low. “Why? You’re too beautiful for that shit. You can’t just up and smoke and drink your life away. You’re smart and the best out of all of us in school,” Rafe said.

“Yet, I’m broke. Have no family. Barely any friends. I have no one,” her head lowered. “That’s not true,” he lifted her head slow and softly. “You’ve got me. And I promise, I’m not talking out of my ass. On my father, I’m not,” he said.

Everyone knows Rafe Cameron wants to impress his father, Ward Cameron, so his saying that, was slightly believed y/n. But words need action, and she doesn’t know how those actions can happen in her life. Who would up and help a Pogue?

“Gonna get you clean, get to know you, change the way you see the world. You can change the way people see Pogue’s, y/n. You changed me. And that was without a word being spoken to me,” he placed both of his hands on either side of her cheeks.

“You’re so special, y/n. I’ve always seen it, but never sat and thought about it. I was stupid. Shit, I still and for keeping that motherfucker alive, but don’t worry. I’ll do whatever you need. You need this, y/n. You deserve a better life,” Rafe added.

The two looked at each other for a few seconds without saying a word. Y/n ended up pulling safe into a hug. A hug, thanking him for speaking to her like she meant something.

#rafe cameron x reader #outerbanks rafe #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron #rafe x you #rafe fanfiction #rafe x reader #rafe imagine #rafe fic #rafe obx #dark!rafe cameron #rafe cameron x pogue!reader #outer banks pogues #obx pogues #pogues for life #outer banks

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velvetvexations · 21 days ago

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Still hung up on that “culturally appropriating transfems” nonsense but since im in a bitter mood let’s talk about “”””appropriating”””” niche in-group signifiers. Let’s talk about the prevalence of “girlthing” as a new transfem-exclusive self description, about the “all trans girls have a secret other gender they only reveal to other trans girls” thing, about the “binary trans woman is a dogwhistle bc no transfem is truly binary” posts. Let’s talk abt all those paired with these people’s absolute disdain for ever associating themselves with nonbinary people. Nonbinary people just describing ourselves are obviously doing so to make transfems seem ‘less cool’ bc our genders couldn’t possibly be about US, but then they turn around and make post after post about how nobody outside their little group has ever known the depths and nuances of gender. But don’t you dare insinuate they’re not 100% fully woman nothing else. They’re only nonbinary when convenient to shut us up but never when they have to support us. And you can tell how performative it is bc any transfems who dare to describe their not-fully-woman gender in a way that doesn’t adhere to the pre-approved little memes gets immediately excluded or misgendered bc “girlthing” is basically just girl but “male woman” is hatecrimeing them by proxy. It’s so fucking blatant that only one group here treats gender identity and presentation outside the binary as purely aesthetic virtue signalling and it’s not the ‘TME genderfucks’ lmao.

(Same anon who sent the ask about the hypocrisy of so many of these blogs loving nonbinary memes when it suits them but being wildly exorsexist and hostile to any notion of solidarity with non-transfem nonbinary people, wanted to emphasise that this isn’t a transfem-specific issue, just a really obnoxious pattern with a lot of these TME/TMA people and that I don’t believe this is “”””culturally appropriating”””” nonbinary people or anything. I would actually agree that the line between binary and nonbinary trans identities is blurry for many of us! Hence why the double standards going around frustrate me so much! Sorry for the rambling I hope this made sense)

I'm torn because I don't think it's great to do what they do and insinuate their non-binary identity is superficial or fake in some way but it does really gall me how they rake me personally over the coals for calling myself a male woman while doing this shit. Ultimately they are non-binary if they say they are and we shouldn't be trying to prove they're the ones doing non-binaryism wrong, but the way they treat others is startlingly hypocritical, not because they're more fake but because none of their beliefs about "TME genderfucks" stems from any real viewpoints on being non-binary to begin with. It's all just purely a combination of bigotry and insecurity, and statements like "no trans woman is binary" make that extra clear when it's mostly people who do not in fact identify as non-binary that are having these tantrums.

#exor sexism #discourse

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hxhhasmysoul · 6 months ago

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I found it strange how certain fans don’t apparently see the romantic undertone and chemistry between Gon and Killua, but yet still see can Killua as being gay.

Do you think it’s possible that those fans infantilize Gon by not viewing Gon being capable to understand romantic feelings?

Despite the fact that Gon is technically more experienced with those type of relationships compared to Killua…

I think you’re right, some fans do infantilize Gon a lot (or demonise him). But there is more to why he’s not perceived as gay or why his feelings are not so well noticed.

The most obvious as to why they don’t want to see Gon’s quite obvious feelings towards Killua is the expectation of Gon being straight just by virtue of being a shounen manga protagonist. Those guys do not engage in romance usually, and if they do it’s very much in the background or played for laughs. There will just be “and they were all straight” time skip ending.

Based on my observations of the two fandoms I’m a part of, there are a lot of fans who come into stories with preconceived notions of what the story will be. If it’s a shounen the mc will have certain traits, his storyline will have certain beats and they will just ignore anything that deviates from these expectations. (Or get very upset that the story is not meeting those expectations)

Killua can be gay, because he’s not the main character and those are allowed more range by the fandom at large. Like there will be people who expect Killua to be Gon’s rival and get confused that he isn’t, but generally the fandom is more tolerant of Killua not fitting that character trope.

And Killua fits into several western gay stereotypes ( I don’t know enough about Japanese gay stereotypes to say he fits those too).

His body language sometimes slightly veers into what is deemed stereotypically feminine.

He has more distinct outfits than Gon in the anime. In the manga Gon has more outfits, including a dress-up game that Togashi drew as extras, which includes a dress for Gon, which I at least treat as a canon outfit that Gon has. Which makes Gon not really gender conforming 100% of the time, which in our current societal norms makes him seem queer. But most fans never read the manga, or just skimmed through it.

Killua likes sweets which according to gender stereotypes is a girly preference. In Japan this kind of stereotype can be seen that sweets are for kids and girls, but also in the western so called manosphere you can find people claiming that a real man should never order a dessert. I wouldn’t claim that we never see Gon eating sweets in canon, because I’ve never cared enough to keep track of it, but Killua’s obsession with Chocorobos is so prominent it’s a meme.

And the reader is treated to Killua explicitly waxing poetic about Gon in his head. It’s kinda hard to miss.

_____________

In addition to Gon not performing queer stereotypes as much as Killua does, there just is prejudice against the kind of person Gon is. And here comes the full on infantilization.

I kind of hate writing this kind of stuff, attaching diagnosis to characters that officially have none. There are aspects to Gon that can lean into interpreting him as neurodivergent. He has moments of hyperfocus when he becomes blind to the world outside, he sometimes has problems regulating his emotions, he can get single minded, he’s prone to risk taking, has issues with self worth and depression.

Like many neurodivergent people he’s not good when it comes to school learning, school is just not compatible with the neurodiverse.

But people (including some not self aware neurodiverse people) will judge you on your intelligence and maturity if you don’t excel in that environment. With Gon it’s extra annoying, because he proves over and over again how smart he is.

Also Gon has hobbies and shows excitement about them. To a large subset of society that just means you’re a child, like for some reason the mark of maturity is being tepid and not invested in anything but making money and having a nuclear family. Gon still is literally a child, so his excitement is excusable, but it also makes him see much less mature than Killua who’s already trying to perform moderation in showing excitement about things, he doesn’t always manage, but he’s more reserved, above it all. He’s already self-policing his levels of excitement.

And because a lot of people in the fandom are young, these biases are just something that have been ingrained into them by the culture, their family and school and they never paused to actually realise that they actually have these opinions and how fucked up they are, because these opinions just feel like duh, like this is obviously how it should be.

And since we don’t get that much of Gon’s inner voice, it’s easy to get tricked into thinking that unlike Killua, Gon doesn’t have a rich inner life, that he doesn’t have all these thoughts constantly running through his head. He’s just this silly kid who sees a bug and suddenly the excitement of that is just 100% percent of his inner life.

As a silly child Gon’s incapable of romantic feelings, especially gay feelings. Because as we know gay feelings are for older people. Which strongly feeds into the bias that neurodivergent people are generally immature and like should their supposed love lives (or gender identity) even be treated seriously let alone acknowledged?

I personally don’t think that Gon is that much more experienced than Killua when it comes to romance. Like Gon thinks he knows how to throw a date but it’s clear he’s much more interested in the whole planning and preparing a date then being romantic with a person. It feels that his attitude towards “dating” is a little naive and confused, which makes sense because he is a kid. That doesn’t mean he’s incapable of deep love, it’s just that he needs to gain more life experience, actually try to be in a romantic relationship, not just have deep feelings for his friend that they never talk about XD So like I think his experience in romance and dating should only be measured once he tries to take on a date someone he actually would like to date. And not organise play pretend dates for his aunt or as entertainment for some tourist ladies for whom it’s an a funny attraction to indulge a little sheltered boy who things that taking them, complete strangers he’ll never see again his life, on a guided tour of the island and giving them flowers constitutes a proper date. Especially in the context of Gon’s date with Palm.*

_____________

Gon’s love is stated in dialogue and not in his inner monologue, it’s in the way he acts towards Killua, how he repeatedly says that he wants to be with Killua, how much Killua’s safety matters to him. Because of that it’s more missable, it just flows with the scene. It’s not as explicit as Killua’s stream of consciousness. We don’t know what Gon’s stream of consciousness looks like, we don’t know how much of his conscious thought is occupied by him just explicitly thinking about Killua. Because of that the people, who want to see Gon as just a shounen protag, will assume that there are no such thoughts in Gon’s head. Or even more likely, never bother to consider what might be going on in Gon’s head because it’s not something they generally do. And because of the stupid date with Palm gag, they will feel more assured in their assumption that Gon's straight. Because of how Togashi frames it, Gon's clear discomfort with Palm's bahaviour and his complete interest in her as a potential crush are obscured.

_____________

* Dates with older ladies and Palm tangent, le sigh.

Generally Togashi really doesn’t stick the landing when it comes pedophilia.

First of all, it’s pretty clear Togashi did no research on it, just defaulted to stereotypes about it.

There’s Hisoka who kinda embodies the harmful stereotype that links samesex attraction and gender non conforming presentation with pedophilia. And leans into the stranger danger stereotype. In reality creepy strangers like Hisoka are statistically less likely to anything more than passive creepers who stare at kids and have pedophilic scenarios in their heads, because most active paedophiles are people who are in some way close to the child. Unless there is child trafficking going on, or child prostitution. Of course someone so powerful like Hisoka could just use violence or money to get access to children but this is going into speculation about what Hisoka could potentially do outside of what the text gives us. It’s not unreasonable speculation but I don’t think Togashi thought that deeply about it. I just think he went by the stereotype and used the hints of paedophilia as an extra quick association to add to Hisoka’s general super creepy vibe. And I’m saying hints, because Togashi really strives to have plausible deniability here. He always tries to mix in Hisoka’s obsession with strong opponents into the scenes that without that would clearly read as pedophilic. But with that obsession in the mix, it lets some people contest the pedophilic reading, claim that Hisoka’s boner is about Gon’s power growing. I think Togashi muddies the waters on purpose to keep the whole thing less serious.

Some people in the fandom interpret Illumi as a paedophile. Him being one is more in line with what rl statistics would suggest. He has an extremely creepy obsession with Killua, has means to control Killua and is very chill with Hisoka having paedophilic interests. And while I think it’s a reading that makes perfect sense, it is an interpretation. Even if Togashi wanted Illumi to read that way, he still put in enough plausible deniability that many people will just think that interpreting Illumi as a paedophile is reaching.

So now we come to Palm and Gon “dating” older women.

What I think Togashi went for with the older women on Whale Island is to give the reader the image that Gon’s dates were akin to kids throwing tea parties for their toys and/or family members. Especially the mention of him going on dates with Mito makes it more plausible that it was what Togashi intended. Just a kid play pretending to do adult things. Cute, naive, innocuous. And also knowing it’s just role playing. Because most kids know that they are playing, that serving tiny toy teacups to their family members is just pretending to serve tea. They are usually old enough to separate their imagination from reality.

We know that Gon is aware that the date he organises for Palm is pretend. He does not like Palm that way, he does not want to be in a relationship with her and he is trying to let her down easy by taking her on a pretend date. He probably thought it was a good idea because he likely got good feedback from the older women he used to “take on dates”. Likely those women had fun like adults have fun during the fake tea parties. Everyone knows it’s just role playing a scenario for fun.

I don’t think that we’re supposed to think that those women were creepers who believed those dates were real. Because the whole shitty joke is that both Palm and Killua think that it’s real when Gon is perfectly aware that it isn’t.

Gon has enough self-awareness that he knows he doesn’t have feelings for Palm and that he’d like her not to have feelings for him. But he’s also scared of her because she’s an extremely strong nen user and she’s shown to be unstable in a violent way. So he chooses to play into her delusion to get himself out of the situation and not hurt her feelings. Because of his lack of like experience it backfires, because he likely had never met a person like her. He doesn’t know that there is no way not to hurt her feelings at that point, that she’s not a rational actor.

In this Gon both shows that he has emotional maturity in line with his age and certain gaps in understanding the world also in line with his age.

And we also see that Killua treats Gon as intelligent and as mature as himself and with respect for Gon’s life experience because he takes Gon’s words about dating experience waay too seriously. Which is also in line with his age, kids that age can we waay too serious for their own good just because they are trying to perform more and more the societally accepted trappings of maturity.

Why is the joke shitty? Because it’s misogynistic, sexist towards boys and again shows how Togashi didn’t do any fucking research on paedophilia.

In real life we will have people claim that there is nothing wrong with adult women dating or even having sex with teen boys. That these boys should feel proud that they bagged a hottie, that if they complain if they feel bad or exploited they are not real men. That it’s not really pedophilia if an adult woman does that to a boy. It’s also sexist towards boys because it comes with the assumption that a real boy is horny all the time and of course straight.

And the joke is only that Palm is crazy and she threatens Gon with violence into it. At least that the only issue male shounen fans both teenage and adult have with this. Palm is hot enough to be an obvious target of desire for Gon, a hottie to bag, but you know hahaha the best pussy is crazy, just saying hahaha.

And of course we have the sexism of women only being concerned with relationships, and being crazy about that. And easily controllable by men they are attracted to. That it’s okay for Knov to exploit Palms mental state and her feelings for him.

Togashi really shat the bed with this one. And the problem is that a lot of fans hate Palm for this, even more than Hisoka, because Togashi plays it for laughs, unlike with Hisoka. That the only issue presented with the scenario is that Palm is unhinged, otherwise the whole thing would’ve been cool.

The misogyny in fandom is unreal. Because the thing is that if Palm’s story was framed properly the date would’ve been a far more nuanced thing. Yes, her forcing Gon to do it would’ve been creepy and horrible. But also it’d be clear that Palm wants to date Gon because he seems safe and controllable to her. Because she’s being abused and exploited by an adult man who uses her feelings to manipulate her. And she’s looking for a situation where she’d be more in control. She is both a victim and an abuser. And this is a very psychologically realistic situation. There isn’t a direct causation between being a victim of abuse and then becoming an abuser. Not all abusers used to be victims, not all victims become abusers. But there is a significant percentage of abusers that used to be victims. It’s something Togashi could’ve explored with Palm because it’s all there, in the text, but he chose not to. Instead he played her creepy behaviour with Gon for laughs, made her prostitute herself to make Knov happy, and fixed her mental issues through having her bodily autonomy violated… And I’m not sure he could’ve done it worse if he tried. Because the sad truth that this shitty Palm situation came from him not trying, him just defaulting to harmful cliches while writing her and calling it a day, likely not giving her story much thought at all.

#answering asks #hxh #hunter x hunter #gon freecss #killua zoldyck #my ramblings #hxh meta #killugon #killugon meta #palm siberia #gon meta

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wizardsnorlax · 2 months ago

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Ok so update on the Spiral Jon fic I'm writing: I'm getting it onto Ao3 bit by bit because it's super difficult to write on mobile, but I need to take a break and get ideas for the season three events out before they get lost, here's a link to the season 2 notes

Ok here we go

Melanie does not join the Archives, this is for the best

At one point in season 2 Jon gave Sasha Georgie's contact info for "in case of emergency" use so Sasha is gonna be (mostly) ok she just needs to pop an allergy pill every once in a while

Sasha might be good with the hardware of a computer but the software might as well be a completely different language so she's very little help with Georgie's show

Jon takes to reading Statements like I took to weed gummies

Sasha follows about the same trail of clues as Jon did in Canon but Daisy's grip on Sasha is a bit harder to hold so Sasha gets claw slashes on her arms instead of a knife at the throat

Things that have changed about Jon while Sasha was gone: his hair now has ringlet curls, the extra flexibility in his joints has progressed but not to the point anyone has noticed let alone would consider a problem and his eyes are twitchy from the stress of filling her position to the point he looks like he's constantly ODed on caffeine

Sasha gets back in the office and when everyone learns they can't quit or be fired Jon makes it his personal mission to be as much of a menace to Elias as possible

but he'd never do that to Sasha, she gets doodles of her hanging out with Cecil from Nightvale because she's a good boss:)

Martin scolds Tim for how he's been treating Jon and Sasha because of the changes caused by first and secondhand paranormal bullshit exposure

Jon gets to go out for drinks with people who actually like him

Everyone learns why Jon has a shirt that says "the difference between me and Superman is Superman has Super Vision, I need constant supervision

A discussion about who takes Jon home with them is had because at some point the poor goober lost his shoes and started trying to wrap around Martin like a belt

Sasha gets kidnapped on her way home

Michael helps her because some part remembers being an archival assistant and she's treated hers so much better than Gertrude did

Helen doesn't take Michael's place but the door still rejects him and the corridor collapses as both Sasha and Michael crash into Jon's new flat

Michael is freed but is in such bad shape he needs to be in the hospital for several weeks on recovery

Things attempt to be normal

Tim and Jon are menaces to Elias in very different ways

Jon doesn't want anyone traveling alone

Elias doesn't care but can't STAND the idea of Jon being there without a buffer so Sasha gets to have company on her trip, Tim goes to India and gets the ghost bullet, cue Mystery Mousketool meme

Martin, Basira and Daisy are handling the workload as best they can but since none of them are particularly suited to the task things go badly because Martin is terrible at direct leadership

When Sasha and Jon get kidnapped by Trevor and Julia, Sasha decides that the best way to clear some of the air is through lore dumping her backstory (still to be determined)

Jon is deemed suspicious by the false cop cause he does NOT look sober

Insert attempted police brutality interrupted by a shotgun

While the false cop is regenerating Jon gets the "how did you two meet" Statement from Julia

They get to the cabin and Jon freaks out a little at the idea of reading ANOTHER cursed book

Big relief when nobody gets eaten this time

Nobody ever believes him but Jon has kept every promise he's made (not that he's made many before but it's the principle of it)

Yoinks the page

Our duo finishes the assignment

Back home

Sasha learns about the storage unit

JON STOP REACHING FOR THE EXPLOSIVES YOU ABSOLUTE GREMLIN

Tim is EXTRA motivated to wreck shop at the Unknowing

Jon and Martin stay behind to be distractions

Big boom happens, Tim makes it out because the guy's literally too angry to die, Sasha is in the coma, Daisy is in the Coffin and Basira is just having a time of it

Jon gets mind fondled by Elias and it makes Martin want to rip the bastard's throat out but the best he can do is have the cops rough him up as much as possible

Jon is temporary head of the Archives and the pressure swallows him whole and he crashes like a meteorite because he desperately doesn't want to be the one giving orders

Martin's "assistance" has been leaving cobwebs in places nobody checks

And thus we enter season 4

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #sasha james #tim stoker #martin blackwood #au fic

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yermes · 7 months ago

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PAC: are you sad, horny, and struggling through finals week? Well heres a reading 4 u 📚 🫐🪞💡

Disclaimer: please take what I say with a grain of salt and not as the gospel. I just want to share some ideas of practicing and giving advice using the medium as often as I can with school, work, and my own personal studies and practice. But I am working on sharing my notes soon so that will be exciting! Liking and sharing does a lot 🥰

Socials: Podcast | Follow me!

Pick a meme

1 2 3

The cards

Le Six De Coupe 🫖

Le passé

Babe use to past mistakes to learn and grow and to thrive during finals week rather than fall to the challenge. Use ypur joy and excitement of ypur current work to carry you through and not to dwell on the past you are done and you will succeed. The past that lingers over your shoulder will fall to joy and you will use your memories of finals week past to thrive.

La Force 🦁

You WILL rise to the challenge of finals and be unafraid for you are prepared to succeed. Learning is a process and like most processes, what makes its beautiful and meaningful is its end. You will have an overall successful finals week.

Le quatre d’ epée ☕️

Solitude

Listen no one fucks with finals week. Your room is a mess, you have no social life, you are literally locked away studying your lil brain out and you feel lost and hopeless. Take that break, take that nap, get a treat with your friends. You are being forced into solitude by finals but you do not have to succumb to the condition of it.

Extras:

Story/vent:

THANK YOU TO MY BEAUTIFUL FRIEND WHO GIFTED ME THIS DECK!

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my-name-is-apollo · 9 months ago

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OKAY so I read "The Caesars" by emperor Julian and y'all, if you love Lucian's satires this is absolutely for you.

Here are some of my favorite parts from it:

A quick summary: Romulus (who has now attained the status of a god, like Heracles) once hosted a Saturnalia and invited the Greek gods and the Roman emperors to the banquet. A contest between the Roman emperors ensued, with Alexander the Great called in as an extra contestant upon Heracles' request.

Silenus is the star of the show, doing most of the jesting. But I really like the way his bond with Dionysus is highlighted

And it's no joke, he really does roast these emperors till they're sizzling lol starting with Julius Caesar himself:

Next comes Augustus Octavius, whose entry is so pretentious and pompous that it becomes repulsive

Apollo gets a bit defensive over his "nursling" (a nod to the belief that Octavius was actually Apollo's son) and goes *insert Barbie meme "it's really not that bad! it just needs a little... shaping. To the salon!!"* ft Zenon the Philosopher who casts some spells of philosophy to make Octavius less obnoxious

And it works because Octavius is mostly humble and well mannered for the rest of the day lol

Heracles grabs this opportunity to fanboy over Alexander the great.

Like, "my beloved Alexander"?? It's cute when the gods gush over their mortal descendants.

Now, a shoutout to the emperors who didn't even get a chance to sit in the assembly because they were the worst of the lot apparently. We have:

Caligula, so terrible that the gods didn't wanna even look at him and he straight away was sent to Tartarus

Nero, who tried to be an Apollo wannabe and promptly got taken to the underworld

Commodus, whom Silenus didn't even bother to roast (and he tripped and fell anyway, what a loser)

There are more but these were the funniest

Anyway, the gods decide on how to choose the best amongst the Emperors. Apollo and Hermes have differing opinions on this, but Zeus decides to entertain the suggestions of both of his sons :3 (finally, one instance where he treats Apollo and Hermes equally)

All the emperors talk about their achievements first, then Hermes cross examines them to see if their motives were worthy enough and oh boy, it does not go well for Alexander who is brought to the verge of tears by Dionysus lmaooo

Anyway, in the end the gods vote and Emperor Marcus Aurelius wins the contest. But after that, Zeus asks each emperor to choose a god to spend the rest of their evening with

Ares and Aphrodite kind of just adopt Caesar LOL and yes, Cronus is present, sitting beside Zeus, with Rhea and Hera also sitting with them. He is the one who nominates Marcus Aurelius.

but here's the most crack part of this whole thing:

Like who invited Jesus bro skdjsndn 😭

Anyway, the story ends with Hermes giving some generic advice to the author, Emperor Julian and ending the story. Also, Julian lets us know that this whole story was told to him by none other than Hermes himself, and gives a disclaimer that he doesn't know if it's is true or just a lie fabricated by Hermes, or a mixture of both LMAO

Here's the link PLEASE READ THE ENTIRE THING

#Kronos #Zeus #Dionysus #Silenus #Apollo #Hermes #some jokes and roasts I did not understand because I am really not well versed with these emperors #and the many atrocities they've committed #but this made me more interested in digging into the Roman empire than anything else #Like Heliogabalus?#Absolute madlad #I should have known about him sooner #Anyway #Even if you just like seeing Greek gods hang out and have a nice family chat #You will really enjoy this #Emperor Julian #The Caesars #dadpollo

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anonimusunnoaniswriting · 10 months ago

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Fucked my way up to the top

A follow up to Clumsy Office Intern

Boss!Sukuna x ClumsyIntern!Reader

WARNING: THIS IS A HEAVILY DUBCON FIC. BUT THAT IS ALL IT IS FICTION. I do not endorse such behaviors. If this is happening to you God forbid, it's not sexy or cool it's abuse seek help. Reader is very much hierarchically lower than Sukuna who is her boss. And he takes advantage of this. He is not a good man. Sukuna is also older than reader by a bit. Reader does not say yes. Read at your own discretion.

This has been betad now. We die of cholera like normal people in the Victorian era or poverty or whatever. Many thanks to my beta reader @ominous-meme for all her help.

Ryomen Sukuna, forty-five, manager at the company, a well-known dictator among the employees – even ones not on his team – had his eye on you. The stupid blubbering intern who kept messing up and kept getting saved by her co-workers. Why, though? Why were these men and women so devoted to you? It was simple. You had enraptured them like a demon of lust straight from the second circle of hell.

He watched you now, eyes trailing up your smooth thighs to the pronounced curve of your ass; to your thick tummy; to your soft breasts just barely peeking out from the pale blue shirt you wore with its first two buttons undone. Around your neck, you wore a thin silver chain with a small gemstone that glinted in the light catching his eye. A gift from an employee – Gojo-kun. “For doing so well in your first month here, Intern-chan!” he had announced to the cubicle. Sukuna had rolled his eyes then, and he did so again now. It was clear that the blue topaz was a stupid way of him trying to claim you as his own. Geto and Ieiri liked bringing you little treats too – snacks from the vending machine, an “extra” coffee “accidentally” made. And Nanami… Sukuna scoffed to himself. The biggest simp. Always softly smiling at you, making sure you’re going for your lunch break, waiting with you till you finish up work. Effectively making sure that all the time you spent in the office, you interacted with Sukuna minimally.

It was infuriating. So now that he had gotten hold of a chance, there was no way in hell he wouldn’t let it go. Here you were, all alone in the office, working late on a project that he had strategically told you about only this morning, knowing that Nanami Kento’s watchful eye was on a work trip out of the office for the day...

He approached your little desk (littered with small notes of encouragement from your co-workers and your cute stationery) and scoffed at your hunched back seeing the Cinnamoroll and Kuromi pen and pencil alongside the Hello Kitty eraser. Hearing him, you turned around in your chair slowly, wary of what he might ask. “Sukuna-kachou, I’m working on the ta–”

“That’s not what I’m here for.” He cut you off brusquely. You waited for him to speak, anxiety slowly growing in your chest. If only Geto-senpai or Nanami-senpai were here, you thought. They might have acted as a buffer or if only just to calm you a little. “We should have a chat. Wrap up and come to my office please.”

This was it then, you mused. At least you weren’t going to be fired in an office full of people. It would just be you and him; everyone else having left for the weekend, probably enjoying themselves in clubs and bars; drinking and doing karaoke.

Saving the file you were working on, you packed up your things and headed to Sukuna Ryomen’s room. It was a nice spacious office, with a large desk and even a sofa set around a coffee table. Being on the thirteenth floor meant the large windows displayed the sprawling city in front of you, the lights scattered all around with none of the usual bustling city sounds.

Sukuna sat at his desk leaning back in his chair, his thick arms crossed behind his head, pushing up his hair. He indicated with a nod of his head for you to sit in the chair opposite; you did so, carefully trying to glean what it was going to be. A reprimand? A firing? Were you going to have to look for something new now? Your mind was running a hundred miles an hour thinking up all the possible scenarios you might have to face.

Your boss’ voice cut through your thoughts, “How long have you been working at this company now?”

“Sir? O-one month and a few days, sir.” You squeaked out a response.

“Hmmm…This is your first time working in such a big place isn’t it?”

You nodded, “It’s my first time working, sir.”

Sukuna felt his cock twitch. The softness in your voice, the innocence. He couldn’t wait to absolutely ruin you. He wanted to mould your cunt in the shape of his cock.

There was a lull in conversation. As clumsy as you were, you didn't want to lose this job.

You were about to tell him that you’d work harder when he suddenly spoke up. “You’ve improved a lot since you first came here, you know. But you still have a long way to go.” He paused as if he was thinking, then said, “I want you to do something for me.”

You nodded your head vigorously, thinking you'd do anything to save your position here; such a prestigious company with a good name and so much potential for growth.

“You see, I need to know that you’re dedicated to your work here.” You were so dedicated; you could show him! “I need to know you’re dedicated to me.” You would do anything to prove it! “I want you to get on your knees and suck my cock”

Anything…?

You spluttered, unable to form the words needed for an adequate response. “You want to keep this job don’t you?” he asked smoothly. Your head slowly nodded in response while your brain frantically tried to process the situation you were in. “Then get on your knees and show me just how dedicated you are, slut!”

Sukuna barked out the last word, startling you into getting out of your chair and going around his desk. You barely understood what you were doing, only that he had angled his chair as you walked around to him, to allow you the space to kneel before his crotch...and then you were dropping to your knees.

“Good girl.”

You watched as your trembling hands unzipped the black slacks, pushing the band of his boxers down. These small hands pulled out his cock from inside, the pink of your nail enamel reflecting your face – wan and blank with eyes wide, lips slightly parted. It was this that made you pause.

Sensing your hesitation Sukuna caressed your cheek – an uncharacteristically gentle touch that made you drop your guard – which was all the opportunity he needed to shove his cock into your mouth. The slight graze of your unsuspecting teeth made Sukuna hiss.

“Oi, watch yourself brat. Come on. I thought you wanted me to know how dedicated you are.”

You couldn’t help but open your mouth wider, pink glossy lips stretched around his thickness. Sukuna had thick veins running down the sides of his cock that you could feel against your tongue as you licked down.

A groan made you look up at the man through your lashes. You looked so young and soft. Sukuna felt himself twitch in your mouth. “Suck, brat. What are you looking at me for?” You dipped your head low, taking in as much of him as you could and felt him grab your ponytail.

If he wasn’t before, Sukuna was now completely under your spell. Your warm mouth wasn’t just sucking his cock, your hands weren’t simply wrapped around his thickness. You were milking him, for all he was worth, his lust, overpowering. For a moment he had to wonder if you were really human. That you weren’t in reality a succubus sent by Satan.

He used his grip on your hair to shove your head down along his cock. You couldn’t help but gag. “Ganbare ganbare…” The soft words of praise that fell from Sukuna’s lips came with a hidden warning that you couldn't help but heed. Do this well, Intern, your job is on the line.

You laid your tongue flat out and forced yourself to suck, pulling yourself off his cock with a pop! Then a kiss on his purplish head. You started licking up and down his length the way you’d seen so many times in porn. All those unrealistic situations had now come alive; here you were kneeling in between your boss’s legs and sucking his cock, taking him deep into your mouth while you played with his balls. The dark hair at the base of his dick tickled your nose and you resisted the urge to scratch it. Sukuna let you go at your pace for a while, let his cock explore the confines of your mouth as he watched your small head bob up and down in his lap.

But he was never known for his patience, so without warning, you found yourself deepthroating him as he thrust up into you. Head held down by both hands, Sukuna shoved his length down your throat, over and over with little regard for your whimpers. Tears streamed down your eyes while he abused your poor mouth. Your nails dug into his thighs but he barely noticed, lost in the bliss of how you felt.

“Come on, little girl. Take it! Take my fucking cock!”

Your jaw was starting to hurt now from the stretch. You found yourself thinking of your kind co-workers. What would they think if they saw you in this deplorable state? You never wanted to find out.

A jerk—-and Sukuna was cumming in your mouth. Bitter and acrid on your tongue, you almost spat it out, but Sukuna pushed himself deeper and growled, “Fucking swallow, brat! I don’t want to see a single drop wasted.”You forced yourself to swallow. The disgusting taste clung to your tongue, making you gag. Sukuna pulled you off his cock, to your feet, and onto his lap. One hand explored your body, while the other stroked your hair. “You did a good job, little intern. Perhaps we can see about getting you a more permanent position in the company now.”

The intern position isn’t good enough for you anymore. Sukuna thought to himself. Maybe you’d be better off as my personal assistant…

Masterlist

#anonimuswritings #anonimusunnoan #jjk #jjk sukuna #sukuna ryoumen smut #sukuna ryomen #sukuna x reader #sukuna #dubcon #fanfiction #FICTION #NOT REAL #SUKUNA IS NOT GOOD #bad #bad man #walking red flag

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joyce-stick · 10 months ago

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An Essay About Slash Review of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, A Video Game Which is Very Good

(and also: has prompted many quite wrong rather bad takes)

An essay by Audrey of the joystick system

The very bad discourse and drama around The Coffin of Andy and Leyley has served to obscure the simple fact that it is quite a very good video game and this video essay is here to tell you about that.

Video version:

youtube

Previous video essay: Lost Judgment's Lost Plot

If you enjoy this essay, please consider following us here or on any other platforms, and/or donating to support future works via our Patreon or Ko-fi.

Patreon • Ko-fi • YouTube • Twitter • Cohost • Tumblr • Bluesky

Transcript:

Hi everyone. So. The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is really, really fucking good.

If you’ve heard of this game, you’ve probably heard of it in the context of memes, screenshots divorced from context, and/or capricious moral outrage. If you’ve not heard of this game, well, you’re hearing of it now! And good thing, too, because much of the coverage and discussion around this game that already exists has… been, let’s just say, not particularly earnest. I hope to remedy that at least somewhat with this video.

If you’ve heard about this game because of discourse, and come here expecting drama and hot takes, then, this may not be your video. Or your YouTube channel, even. Or maybe it is, if you’d like the delicious comments section. If you’re that sort of clicker, though— welcome! I’m Audrey of the joystick system, and this is the place where I (and my headmates) talk honestly about things we care about, and I hope you’ll hear me out a little and maybe consider staying and improving our viewer retention. Thanks, if you do.

So, to writ: My purpose today is to gush. I will be gushing here. For most of it. And as for what I will be gushing about, some of it will be gushing BLOOD, GUTS, AND DELICIOUS DEATH. I am entirely serious. The subject of today’s presentation contains mature content, including copious foul language and themes slash depictions of death, cannibalism, cultism, demon summoning rituals, parricide, dystopian social decay, and heterosexuality. Oh, and also a little bit of incest as a treat, I guess, but the incest is heterosexual, and that’s worse.

[long pause]

Excellent. You’re still here. So. This morbidly beautiful video game may not be for everyone, but that’s good, because it is instead for exactly me! A short plot synopsis of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley might go as follows:

if you're not watching the video listen to this for extra effect

Siblings Andrew and Ashley Graves are forcibly quarantined inside their apartment by the local authorities, with no food and even less hope for rescue. Their parents have abandoned them. Absolutely no one is coming to save them. In order to survive and escape this awful situation, they butcher and consume the fresh flesh of some guy who got himself soul vored by a demon that he summoned without a plan.

This conspicuously carnivorous crime, and their effort to cover their tracks, puts them in a fair bit of a deeper shithole than they are already in. So naturally they keep digging themselves deeper by committing even more crimes, AND in the process, also dig themselves deeper into their toxic codependent sibling relationship, which is going just great, thank you. Sure, Andrew almost killed his sister, but he didn’t, and that’s what matters! And she still loves him, so it’s all good!

This is of course a joke.

First thing I absolutely love about this game is the writing. It’s witty, intelligent, uncompromising, and just generally delicious. It holds nothing back in depicting the toxicity of the two leads and their relationship, resulting in two compelling characters whose flaws and few virtues perfectly complement slash exacerbate one another, resulting in a beautiful train wreck of a relationship dynamic that proves equal parts disturbing, mesmerizing, and hilarious.

The charming darkly comedic bite of the writing style also lends a lot of great character to the setting. This sardonically presented dystopian world is both richly detailed and fleetingly elaborated on, a commendable balance to have achieved, in my opinion. The first chapter of this game is hilarious not just because of the banter between Ashley and Andrew (which is terrific), but because it presents such a sharp satire of current year bullshit.

As just an example, I give you, one of my favorite jokes in the game:

I probably don’t need to explain the thing this is making fun of to you, but I will anyway.

The situation presented in The Coffin of Andy and Leyley’s first episode is very easily readable as an allegory for how disasters that are a direct result of ongoing 2020s late capitalist decay continuously fuck people over. In particular, this scenario feels like a direct commentary on both the COVID-19 pandemic as well as the Flint, Michigan water crisis. The former obviously has affected way more people but what both have in common is that they are crises created and exacerbated by malfeasance and/or negligence committed in the name of for-profit interests, and that the “response,” to them, such as there was one, has amounted to dehumanizing and marginalizing the victims while minimizing the issue, forcing the victims out of society’s wider view, and being reticent to punish the individuals responsible.

Just as the authorities responded to the water crisis and the worst excesses of the pandemic in real life, the authorities in The Coffin of Andy and Leyley impose half-measures designed to further restrict the freedom of the dirty undesirables who bear the worst damages, while merely shielding the upper echelons of society from the disaster rather than actually addressing or attempting to solve the issue. Most of you who lived through 2020 in the United States probably have experienced the frustration of being on the receiving end of this kind of policy.

During the pandemic, the quarantine was supposed to protect us, but for a lot of people it ended up doing quite the opposite. A lot of folks didn’t have any savings, and couldn’t get any since the employment market wasn’t exactly on fire, and our representatives had to be bothered way too much just to put out a pithy economic stimulus just to save face. Not to say that this all has stopped, exactly, as all that’s changed now is that we’re just, living with this situation, but.

It wasn’t literally a cop outside everyone’s door preventing them from going outside to not die, but for a lot of people, it might as well have been that! Never mind those who, y’know, had no inside to retreat to. Or were imprisoned during the pandemic and left even more unprotected! Or thrown out by their landlords! And so on. And, y’know, the big chain grocery stores keep throwing out all the perfectly good unsold food, so they’re already sending this message in all but, well… these exact words.

So, that’s why I think this joke lands. It’s exaggerated, but familiarly rooted, and that’s just good satire! It’s a joke which feels lifted right out of Invader Zim, which, I would put The Coffin of Andy and Leyley right about on the level of as far as both the tone it’s going for and the quality of its execution. Which of course, brings us to the extremes that these circumstances push its characters, and its plot, to.

Okay, so, also like Invader Zim, The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is hardly a polemic, nor is it a morality tale. Sure, there’s social commentary in it, but that’s just a nice side thing. It’s not a story about the otherwise innocent victims of an unjust society who are pushed to do terrible things by circumstances outside their control— it is, rather a story of terrible people, who, both because of their character failings, and the desperate situations they find themselves in, find themselves doing even worse things.

Andrew and Ashley commit the cannibalism the first time in large part because they kind of have to do it. No food! Cop outside their door actively deterring them from getting food! Out of options! So they do it. They could probably be excused, if only they were given a fair trial. Which they realize they’re not going to get. So yeah. It’s understandable that they do it. And that they kill this one cop, who very much has it coming.

But they do not have to keep doing it! And gosh grief, do they keep fucking doing it— so many its. They really do not stop digging that hole that they are in. Even the first time that they do the cannibalism, when they kind of really have to do the cannibalism, Ashley is just a little bit more excited about doing the cannibalism than she probably should be.

I love this kind of delicious edgy dark humor. I love stories that go for it, imagine the worst possible people they can, and also try to make that funny. I love this about Invader Zim, that it presents a character who is unquestionably a monster, but also has relatable human desires like wanting to fit in and being concerned about looking weird or abnormal, but has those feelings for very different reasons and acts on them by committing some very despicable crimes. It really gets at a deep-seated darkness that I and a lot of other fucked up traumatized queer people who were little kids when this show aired have, the catharsis of visualizing some of our worst intrusive thoughts while evoking the emotions that pushed us to imagine this kind of fucked up shit.

I’ve loved this kind of thing since we saw Heathers when we were 14. Heathers is an absolutely incredible film that you should check out, by the way, and about which we failed to properly or interestingly articulate our thoughts a few years back. Its lead protagonists, Jason “J.D.” Dean and Veronica Sawyer, are similarly relatable characters who have familiar feeling flaws and emotionally resonant trauma hangups, and also function as very toxic enablers of each other’s worst traits, leading them to work through those feelings by, y’know, murdering their classmates!

Heathers made us realize just how exactly mentally ill of a 14 year old we really were when we were 14, and I love it for that. So. So fucking much.

That was ten years and change ago.

We are still a mentally ill 24 year old.

And Andrew and Ashley Graves, if I had to sum them up, are basically J.D. and Veronica, if they were in their twenties, siblings, and also way, way, way worse.

And I love them.

So, obviously. Ashley and Andrew are hilarious. At least, I find them to be such. They’re terrible, and awful, and amazing, and Ashley is such a girlboss. She is one of the most God Forbid Women Do Anything characters ever.

Anyway! I’ve talked about the cannibalism, and the dystopia, and the characters, and why all of that’s good. I’ve also forgotten to talk about the part where they evade an assassin, and, also a host of other things.

I love that this game has so many fun little optional interactions with NPCs, objects, and items, that you can totally miss. I love how the narration hints at the solutions to puzzles by snarkily referring to things you can interact with as what their purpose is to the characters rather than what they are, this quip about the mop that you clean up a murder scene with, the interactions that Andrew has with these cultists who suck at demon summoning, the excellent in-game art and the brilliant visual duality of Andrew and Ashley’s character designs, this line where Andrew is upset that life is so hard for them as fugitives from the law because they can only find this one shitty motel that takes cash and doesn’t ask them for their ID, and also the music, which is royalty free music made by people unassociated with the developer but is nonetheless perfectly suited for the game.

So much about this game is stuff I find so completely brilliant, and I have so little to criticize, that I think we’d probably be here all day if I kept going. So.

Let’s spend a thousand ish more words talking about the parents.

When The Coffin of Andy and Leyley begins, the protagonists’ parents are absent. You can optionally find two early references to them early on— one, if you interact with the bed in their bedroom, and encounter the shocking revelation that “Your parents have FUCKED on this bed.”

The second, is if you interact with the phone, the game dutifully informs you that,

You’re probably less than five minutes into the game at this point, barely begun solving the first puzzle, which prompted you to “find nutrients to not die.” And of course, this says about all you need to know. These children have been abandoned. But if it needed to be any clearer, the game later delivers unto you a flashback to prior in the story, when Ashley desperately calls Mrs. Graves for help after they leave and go move to a hotel, and later a new house, to which the kids are of course not invited. And this specific scene, specific line, here, fucking hit me:

“And I don’t want to hear these lies about starving anymore.”

Emphasis mine.

Even as Ashley and Andrew escalate the severity of their crimes which gradually come to have less and less to do with their need to survive as the story goes on, I find it very hard to not be on their side at least a little bit, and this is easily the biggest reason why.

I have had this phone call.

Not this exact specific phone call, of course. Obviously, I’ve never been locked up in an apartment with an armed patrol outside my door whose job it was to gaslight me while ensuring that I starved to death. Obviously, my mom has never said those exact words.

But gosh grief and fuck me if it’s never felt like she has. She may as well have fucking told me that, with all the things she told me I was lying about. And who fucking knows, maybe she did say those exact words to us, and we repressed them. I don’t know. I am very not done working through all the bullshit that she gaslit us over.

*sighs, preparing to vent*

I have called our mother and had to beg her to pay for food. I have called her and had to beg to pay for our rent, while our parents were supposed to be supporting us studying abroad. I have called her and begged her to forgive me for daring to use just a few of the thirty dollars our parents used to send us to live with every month back then, to buy a drink or a movie ticket or something. I have had to concede to our parents financially holding us hostage, had to go the last week of the month on a shoestring diet while waiting for them to graciously deposit another thirty dollars into our bank account... so that we could continue eating. I used to relish February, the shortest month, for being the one part of the year in which I had to stretch out that thirty dollars the least. And once, I pleaded with our mother to pay for us to move to another apartment when the landlord suddenly kicked us out of the current one, abruptly and obligatorily switching gears from arguing with her to kissing her ass through our gritted teeth, under threat of our parents cutting off their financial support of us completely, abandoning us in a foreign country where we had no money, no job, and barely spoke the language.

And one day, after I stopped dancing to their tune, they just stopped listening, stopped even pretending to want to help. After nineteen years of escalating emotional and physical abuse and neglect, they abandoned us. And one day, after I spent months working 10 hour days every week Ubering food around for tips, sending my resume, filling applications, making calls, stopping into places to ask for work, all to no avail, for months, and desperately plugging the Patreon page of this very YouTube channel praying that some generous soul with money to burn would solve all our problems. All of this still wasn’t enough, and wasn’t going anywhere, and I’d run out of money and was short on rent on the one sublet room we could get that cost exactly three hundred dollars…

And I called her, and I asked her for help. I really didn’t want to. I wanted to hear nothing of her again. And she said to stop lying. To stop bullshitting her that I couldn’t get enough money, or find a job.

Not too long after, I swore off all contact with her, and eventually also with our father. And every time I have spoken to either of them since, I have made no secret of how I feel. Because if I get nothing out of kissing their ass, why fucking pretend.

My family is not poor. They own their house. They own, and leased out, a second house. Their house is full of fancy IKEA furniture and various other niceties, they’ve renovated the place at least twice, they live in a nice, safe neighborhood, they have an attic and a basement, they at one point paid for multiple plane tickets for us per year while still refusing to let us eat on any more than thirty five dollars, an extra five dollars we also had to beg them for. Our dad has a lucrative tech job. All of this, and they insisted, while refusing to answer questions about their finances in any detail, that they couldn’t afford to help us go to where we wanted to go for college, that they had no place for us in their house, that they couldn’t afford three hundred dollars of rent to help us have a roof over our head for one more month.

So when I read this delightful jaunt of a chapter of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, where Andrew and Ashley break into their parents’ new huge house to steal all their shit, and Ashley says “This is some rich people stuff!” about their fireplace,

And when their mom says, “there’s no room to keep housing you here indefinitely,” and the internal monologue says, “even though it’s way bigger than the old house.” It’s both an entertaining mockery of the attitude of the typical American family, how first you’re your parents’ property for eighteen years and then you’re turned out on your own to face the world without their support, and how the fuck are you supposed to live like that, to figure out how to live your life in the face of that, to meaningfully be a fulfilled person in that situation, especially in a time, when, no, mom, I can’t pay a college tuition on a waitress salary like you did back in the fucking nineties, you c--t,

Even though they have an extra bed in their basement and a perfectly good couch and plenty of space for another bed besides, and a vegetable garden, and a kitchen, and all these other middle-class petty bougie niceties, the Graves mom says, “sorry, we can’t keep helping you,” and. And. I read all this, and I think,

“I understand why Ashley wants to fucking flay these people. I understand why she wants to K1!L them.”

I cannot tell you how much catharsis the ending of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley episode 2 gave me. I cannot convey the weight of my gratitude that someone out there validated my anger and my specific fucked up power fantasy with their art. I didn’t even ask them to. I probably would’ve eventually done it on my own. But I’m so glad that someone did it for me.

If I ever hypothetically meet Nemlei, somehow, and have some cash, I will happily buy them a drink. Hopefully, by paying this excellent game’s ten dollar cover price, I already have!

I know you’re not watching this, but on the off chance this reaches your ears, I just wanna say thanks. For giving me a safe, legal, regret-free, socially acceptable, non-violent outlet for the rage I feel towards my parents.

Well.

Mostly socially acceptable.

Meow.

This game is not finished, as you may have noticed if you’ve gone to check it out on Steam. It ends on an ambiguous and open note, but in my opinion, a perfectly satisfying one. Nemlei could disappear absolutely, never release the proper ending of this game, and never make another game again, and I would not be mad. I've already got more than my money’s worth and then some. So. Yeah. I’m happy. Count me as happy!

I kinda wanna start talking a bit more about the branches of the second episode. I wanna say how it’s a brilliant idea to have two separate story arcs for the two variations of this episode’s ending, and how I hope that that’s executed on as beautifully as the rest of the game already is. I wanna talk about the ways in which Andrew and Ashley’s mom is ambiguously humanized despite being so obviously terrible. I wanna talk about the dialogue Andrew does when his parents offer him a chance to make amends, and he has doubts, if you choose to let him have them, and how I would probably also have doubts in his position, and not be able to follow through without my lovely evil cannibal sister pushing me towards… the thing. I wanna talk about this line, where Ashley talks about why she likes eating people, and how it’s so equal parts poetic and macabre and edgy bullshit and that that’s such a beautifully balanced cocktail of emotion to nail and Nemlei totally fucking nails it

I WANT TO GUSH FOREVER. ABOUT THIS GAME. AND I WANT NO ONE TO STOP ME.

Alas, I will stop myself.

And move on to the elephant in the room!

THE FUCKING.

Mom: “But that-.... That doesn’t make any sense.” Mom: “Why would you not-......” Mom: “Ah, I get it.” Andrew: “..........??” Mom: “You fuck her.” Andrew: “Wha— HUUUUH?!?!!?” Mom: “Oh that is disgusting! Andrew, she’s your sister for god’s sake!” Andrew: “I haven’t done anything!? What the hell, mom!?” Mom: “Then what does she give you that makes it worth all this?” Andrew: “W-well that’s none of your business, is it??” Mom: “I knew something was off… How did I fuck up so bad? I’m the worst mother ever..!” Andrew: “No! I mean yes you are, but I have never—!” Ashley: “I’m baaaa-ack!!!” Andrew: “Now of all times!?” Ashley: “I got the money! Did you miss me, handsome?? Did you? Did you??” Mom: “...........................” Andrew: “(I WANT TO DIE!!!!!!)”

Okay. So. I said I didn’t want to talk about this. But I’m talking about this game. I can’t not talk about it.

Yep, it’s hot takes and drama time!

So, not too long ago, Nemlei deleted their Twitter, their Itch.io, their everything, their entire online presence. The Steam page for The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, which used to list Nemlei as the developer and publisher, now lists “Kit9 Studio.” It is the only game to their name on the platform. A community forum post from said entity known as Kit9 announces that “the developer” (no name given) “has decided to permanently and completely terminate their activities online from here on.”

I don’t know exactly what happened, or why they did this. There’s a lot of people around who sure think they know. But in brief, as neutrally as possible: Nemlei, or someone close to them, was doxxed, or at least sought out as a doxxing target, by one or multiple users of an online forum. Their supposed crime? Making a video game “for degenerates.”

I don’t know who did the doxxing. I don’t know what their motive was, and for my own sanity, I am not going to look. I am choosing not to care. The most important and most obvious fact at hand here is that Nemlei’s creation has been met with controversy amongst social media users, and about one or two hack video game outrage journalists, who seem to have nothing better to do or say. And it seems clear that the doxxing wouldn’t have happened had they not been met with this negative attention. And all because of this.

Not the cannibalism, not the parricide, not the demon sacrifices. No, um, the one implied sex scene.

And it doesn’t even actually happen! It’s just a premonition of a possible future event that Ashley and Andrew supernaturally receive. It’s not particularly graphic, it doesn’t yet go anywhere, and it’s a short scene on an optional route that the game actively forewarns you about. You have to be trying to see it on purpose.

Well, that’s all true. It is indeed a minor and avoidable scene, and the discourse about it has absolutely poisoned the well when it comes to the conversation about the game. But also, “uhh, it’s optional and not a big thing,” is inadequate as a defense. This is still content in the game that Nemlei actively chose to put in the game, and even discounting this, the themes of incest are all over the game. Ashley speaks flirtatiously to Andrew at basically every turn. Even if you avoid this specific scene, the incest themes are not something you’re going to just not notice, if you’re paying attention to the text.

All that being said, it’s not like this content comes as a surprise. The Coffin of Andy and Leyley’s Steam store page accurately represents the product! A brother and sister. Codependency and cannibalism. It’s not as if you don’t know what you’re paying for and choosing to play. You came here for this! Most of the people playing this are here for this! You have to figure that if they are fine with killing and eating people, they’re probably fine with fucking each other, or, eventually possibly eventually going to be, at least.

So you’d think, except that many people seem to unironically believe that the cannibalism is more moral than the incest.

Oh, god, I’m doing this right now, aren’t I.

So, I get it. While I’m pretty skeptical of the notion that cannibalism is not as bad as incest, I do realize that incest is, at the very least, the more taboo of these things, and that a lot of people are more uncomfortable with it than they are with the cannibalism and the murder. To quote the one positive and in-depth review available in any media outlet at the time of this writing, from Destructoid:

“This aspect is undoubtedly the most controversial element about The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, and I understand why. While cannibalism is a taboo subject, it’s present in mainstream games like Fallout as an option for players. Having incestuous themes crosses over into Drakengard territory, and even then, no option allows Caim to reciprocate Furiae’s feelings for him.”

"The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is horrifying and I can’t get enough of it" Andrea Gonzalez, Destructoid, November 12 2023

So, yeah, I. y’know. Get it. I know why. However.

I can point to a lot of things that Andrew and Ashley do wrong in this game. They are, as per the game’s premise, very not okay, not as individuals, and not together. Andrew is way too attached to Ashley, and Ashley is generally an awful person who is way too attached herself, and also, all too quick on the draw to take advantage of Andrew’s attachment to her to make him do what she wants. This is not a healthy relationship. And we’re here for it! It’s compelling!

But, I think it’s worth asking why it’s such a toxic dynamic. Is it because they’re siblings? Well, not really. It’s a dynamic that’s specifically possible with them being siblings, but it’s not because of their sibling connection.

The actual reason why Andrew and Ashley’s relationship turns abusive isn’t because their relationship is abusive by necessity or nature, but because Ashley abuses their relationship. And she is doing this for basically the whole game. Like, it is abusive the whole time. It doesn’t become abusive when their relationship takes its romantic turn. Does it become more abusive? I mean. Maybe. Maybe the romance exacerbates the abuse. I dunno, we’ll have to wait and see what the next episode says.

So, then, why is the notion of them possibly in the future having sex the elephant in the room here, when before that, they do so many objectively worse things that cause much more harm both to themselves and others? Is that really so much more of a bigger deal than the murder and the people eating?

Or. To phrase it Ashley’s way. You played a game about mutilating and eating your parents’ corpses, and getting laid is what you’re freaking out about?

Is the incest really that much more extreme, or are you just more disgusted with it?

And even if you are more disgusted with it. Even if we grant that it is, actually, somehow, more harmful for siblings to have sex with each other, than to do murder and cannibalism. Is this the hill you’re dying on? What you’ve decided is of such utmost importance and injustice that you decide to go harass some random indie dev who just wants to make a silly video game about a couple of siblings eating people?

Does it truly make sense to let your kneejerk moral disgust guide you to the conclusion that the creator of this game deserves to be persecuted for merely writing about and drawing a thing you don’t like?

Well, to answer that, we have to get into the question of whether or not “immoral fiction” is harmful, or “normalizing” things that are wrong. Does fictionally depicting an immoral action actually cause harm?

I could dance around in circles for a little while about the edge cases, and certain writers who are publishing bad or hateful material in bad faith, or fascist propaganda, which is of course always bad, or whatever other example I could use to qualify my point or list out an exception to appease the people who disagree with me, but, I’ll just cut right to the chase, and tell you the answer

No!

The answer is NO!

The thing about taboos is that they don’t make us more safe. They don’t protect us from bad things. All they do is protect people’s comfort by silencing people they don’t want to understand, and enable bad actors by keeping their victims in the dark, and denying them the ability to talk about it.

The only thing we end up doing by censoring stories about these uncomfortable topics, and making it socially unacceptable to talk about them, is make it harder to know. We deny ourselves knowledge. We deny ourselves a conversation about these subjects, we deny ourselves the ability to meaningfully understand them. We deny ourselves power, what little we have, as readers, to understand, and to critique, to reason.

There’s a tumblr post I really like. Well, a number of them, I really like, on this topic, but I’m picking this one, because it’s got a quote I really like. It talks about Lolita. That Lolita. And, now, I’ve never read Lolita, at least not yet. Lolita is a novel about child sexual abuse, told from the perspective of an abuser. It’s an uncomfortable book with an uncomfortable topic, and it’s not wrong to be uncomfortable with it. The author of this post acknowledges that.

But they talk about it. They talk about how it shines a light on its subject matter. The why and the how of abusers and their actions. The ways in which their victims suffer. How it shows all of this in a way that it only could from the perspective it takes. And, I’m just going to quote them. I can’t do anything else. They said it better than I could, right now.

“Embrace disgusting fiction and then fucking talk about why it’s nasty. Now YOU have the power over reality.” - tumblr user legsdemandias

The Coffin of Andy and Leyley has been ridiculed, joked about, hot taked on, made a target, drama-ed over, and so on, but it’s hardly been criticized. No one I’ve seen admitting to not liking it talks critically about why it’s disgusting to them, or tries to understand why it exists, or what it’s for. And this is most people’s reaction to most media that deals seriously with anything taboo. “I don’t get it. I don’t like it. It shouldn’t exist. Get it away from me.”

I’m annoyed that the medium, the art form, of video games, is valued so little by so many that this is the wide reaction when something like this gets popular. That the mainstream games journalism media ridicules it, and the creator gets threatened by an internet mob, and it falls on the weirdos and the freaks and the no-name YouTube uwu girls, to give it the serious consideration and recognition it deserves.

To summarize, The Coffin of Andy and Leyley is, in my opinion, a very good video game, and on its behalf, I am mad at video games.

Now, go on. You made it through this video. I told you the plot! You can probably stomach the plot! So go, go. Shoo. Go buy Nemlei a drink. If you want to.

Or, buy us, the joystick system, a drink! You can do that at patreon dot com slash joycestick, or, ko-fi dot com slash joycestick. You can buy us drinks in both of those places.

I’ve been Audrey. Thank you for listening.

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