#her having a magical girl power quest in the future is EXACTLY the kind of game we need

[wearethewitches]

Omigod, Arabella as bg4 protagonist???

[fictionaladoptionpolls]

Homura Akemi

Age: 14*

Home: Mitakihara City (Puella Magi Madoka Magica)

Blood type: B

Likes: Madoka, shoplifting from the JSDF

Dislikes: Kybuey, Kyoko, isolation

Weapon: Shield

The asterisk on her age is for that time she spent about 12 years living the same month over and over to save her friend. That’s the kind of outlier that’ll ruin your data set if you don’t earmark it…well, maybe not ruin, considering how many dragons there are, but it’ll mess with things.

There are two parts to Homura’s backstory. First, the part that people could conceivably find out about by looking at the right records. She was in a hospital for most of her life, and her parents are either dead or absent. Second, the part that added an asterisk to her age. She encountered exactly one person who was nice to her, fell hopelessly in love with her, watched that girl sacrifice herself in a way that was supposed to save everyone but just made everything worse, and spent so long trying to save her that said crush became a cosmic keystone. Oh yeah, and she got magical powers between those two parts.

Homura is dangerously obsessed. After far, far too many failures, she has given up on everything except saving Madoka. It’s not even clear if she’s hoping for anything beyond Madoka eventually not dying; she doesn’t think twice about terrorizing Madoka and her friends if it means Madoka won’t make a contract, barely lifts a finger if Madoka isn’t involved (unless she gets to shoot Kyubey), and she explicitly claims that “dedication has no reward”. But she doesn’t care. She doesn’t care about anything.

Except Madoka.

Does Tumblr want to give Homura a hug? What does Tumblr have to say about Homura?

her quest is so hopeful. despite everything, despite all the suffering, she still believes in the future she's fighting for. and i can't believe i never really saw that aspect of it.

she lives in a white void because nothing matters but what we see, there are places to sit, a table, and information about Walpurgisnacht, her task has so wholly consumed her that she might as well live in a white void, nothing else matters but this

if magicalgirlfanproblems was still active, i'd be labelled a homura apologist. and i think that's beautiful

[ammocharis]

Dragon Age OC as a companion

I saw the “OC as a companion” trend started by @little-lightning-lavellan and I really wanted to hop on with my Avvar girl, Vatna, who is normally the Inquisitor and the protagonist of my fic, Watch the Skies. So here it goes! (Heads up - it got pretty long!)

~~

Vatna (born 9:23 Dragon) is an Avvar mage and a potential companion in Dragon Age: Inquisition.

Title: Sky Watcher’s apprentice

Race: Human

Gender: Female

Class: Mage

Affiliation: Avvar, Inquisition (conditional)

Family: Einar (father), Selke (mother), Hirka (sister)

Background

Vatna Einarsdotten Selkesdotten was born in an Avvar settlement called Two Falcon Hold, where she lived until adulthood. Two Falcon Hold is located in the highest part of the Frostback Mountains. It is largely isolated from the outside world; the news arrives through dwarven merchants and Avvar pathfinders, which resulted in Vatna not having any first-hand experience of the Lowlands.

As a seven year old child, Vatna manifested magical ability, and thus she was linked to a spirit, as is customary among the Avvar. The spirit began teaching Vatna how to control her gift. She received lessons in healing, casting barriers, glyph-making, and other types of skills, but she specialized in offensive magic. She displayed an aptitude for elemental magic, particularly the spells associated with cold.

Several years later, with the basic part of her training complete, Vatna peacefully separated from her spirit teacher. Proving herself as a talented mage, she was chosen to become the next Sky Watcher in her hold, and so she continued studying diligently under the augur’s tutelage.

Vatna also underwent a warrior’s training, combining the skillset of a mage with that of a melee fighter. Her weapon of choice is an axe instead of a staff, though she is proficient at using either. After her appointment as the Sky Watcher’s apprentice, Vatna commissioned a battle axe with a lyrium core from the dwarves of Orzammar.

In 9:41 Dragon, a few weeks before the Conclave, Vatna ventured outside of her hold, travelling through the Lowlands for the first time in her life. Her only companion was a falcon called Himnar.

Involvement

Dragon Age: Inquisition

Once the Inquisitor returns from the Hinterlands, a new portion of the Haven map opens up. Vatna can be found on a mountain range located south-east of the Temple of Sacred Ashes. She is fighting demons that are pouring from a large rift. Once the Herald closes the rift, Vatna voices her astonishment at their ability to mend the Veil. In the following conversation, the Avvar mage explains that she was on the way to Haven when the Breach opened. She claims that she’s been trying to fix the situation on her own, with little success. She is accompanied by a peregrine falcon that appears to be exceptionally well-trained. The Herald can ask some additional questions about her background and learn that she’s a Sky Watcher’s apprentice. Vatna says that she wishes to save the Lady of the Skies and help the gods. At the end of this conversation, the Herald can recruit Vatna into the Inquisition right away, tell her that they might consider it (after which she will relocate to the village of Haven), or force her to leave.

Note: Vatna must be recruited before “In Your Heart Shall Burn”. After the fall of Haven, she is no longer available.

If the player chooses to recruit Vatna, she starts following them on their travels. In Haven, she stays by the lake, next to the training grounds of the Inquisition’s soldiers. In Skyhold, she dwells on the battlements by the Herald’s Rest, overlooking the valley below. The peregrine falcon is always seen nearby. Conversations with Vatna focus on magic, spirits, the Frostback Mountains, and the Avvar lore.

After the Herald seals the Breach, Vatna expresses her gratitude about them repairing the Veil (to which she refers as “the Lady’s Veil”). She says that she intends to stay until the one who opened it is defeated. In the following battle of Haven, she can be seen using her ice magic to kill or stagger the attacking forces. On the way to Skyhold, Vatna and her falcon help the Herald scout the path ahead, though she warns that she had heard awful tales about the fortress and the powers that permeate it.

Some time after the Inquisition reaches Skyhold, Vatna might ask for the Inquisitor’s assistance in helping the Avvar. As it turns out, she received the news from Two Falcon Hold that her people, as well as several neighbouring tribes, have been troubled by either the Venatori or the Red Templars. The Inquisitor can complete a war table mission that informs them about further evidence of Corypheus’ forces attempting to establish some kind of a covert operation in the Frostback Mountains, far from the eyes of sovereign nations like Ferelden and Orlais.

If the Inquisitor decides to investigate the lead, they and Vatna travel to the central part of the Frostback Mountains. At their destination, they are told that some Avvar have been injured or killed in skirmishes with Corypheus’ forces, and more people are missing without a trace, Vatna’s younger sister among them. Following the points of evidence to the source reveals that a member of the Venatori has been conducting research on the effect of high altitudes on blood magic potency (as hematocrit increases in an environment with lower oxygen supply). Once all the enemies are defeated, and the kidnapped Avvar are rescued, the Inquisitor may return to Two Falcon Hold with Vatna and speak with the members of the hold to learn more about their situation, and also about their relations with Vatna.

At the end of the mission, if Vatna’s approval is high enough, she approaches the Inquisitor and invites them to climb with her to a nearby mountain peak, where she confesses that she hadn’t shared full truth about herself, but now that the Inquisitor proven trustworthy, she wants them to know something - the falcon she travels with, Himnar, is actually a host to one of the spirits who have lived with her hold for many generations. Vatna and the spirit share a magical bond that allows them to communicate mentally. Moreover, Vatna is a Dreamer, and during her nightly visits in the “Land of Dreams”, she tries to decipher the omens sent by the gods. The reason she travelled into the Lowlands was that she had foreseen a possible catastrophe, but she didn’t know what exactly would happen. As a result, she arrived too late to do anything. At the end of the conversation, Vatna reiterates her wish to protect her people and spirits from dangers, known and unknown.

Afterwards, the Inquisitor and Vatna return to Skyhold. A contingent of the Inquisition’s soldiers is stationed in the Frostback Mountains to deal with the enemies that might still be lurking there.

Once Corypheus is defeated, Vatna expresses her thanks to the Inquisitor for using their power to thwart the Magister’s plans. She says that she intends to help with the remaining tasks, such as closing the rifts and getting rid of Corypheus’ forces thoroughly, but as soon as that’s finished, she has to return to her hold and take on the duties of a Sky Watcher, since her mentor is growing too old to handle everything himself. She invites the Inquisitor to visit her hold sometime in the future and stay as long as they wish.

Trespasser

If the Inquisitor is friends with Vatna:

Two years after Corypheus’ defeat, Vatna unexpectedly arrives in the Winter Palace - as always, with a falcon at her side. The Inquisitor may express their confusion at her visit, to which Vatna replies that the gods urged her to go, even if it meant leaving her people again. She adds that “there’s a disturbance in the Land of Dreams, and the Lady’s Veil is still weak at the seams.” She voices a profound concern about the state of the Inquisitor's Anchor.

While travelling through the Crossroads, she notes that she’s aware the sky is different, though she “could never see it with her own eyes”. If the Inquisitor is an elf, she asks them if they would want to live in a place like that. If the Inquisitor is not an elf, Vatna offers to cast a spell that could alleviate the tiredness that affects all non-elven races in the Crossroads.

If Cole is in the party, he and Vatna engage in a cryptic conversation about dreams.

As the Anchor becomes more volatile, Vatna attempts to stabilize it, but she’s unsuccessful.

In the end, Vatna is shown to have returned to her hold, but it’s hinted that she might be doing something in the Fade to lessen the turmoil among its denizens.

If the Inquisitor is not friends with Vatna:

A letter addressed to the Inquisitor arrives from the Frostback Mountains, signed by Sky Watcher Vatna of Two Falcon Hold. The Avvar mage writes that she and the Inquisitor may not have agreed much, but it’s not going to matter if the world is set on fire. She gives a warning about “travelling the lonely path”. The package that was delivered alongside the letter contains a clear crystal wrapped in a wolf pelt, with a description claiming that the crystal “lessens the headache of watching the other sky through the eyes that weren’t meant to gaze upon it”.

Quests

Made in Mountains (recruitment)

Times of Trouble (war table)

Fraught with Fury (personal)

Strong from Struggle (personal - very high approval)

Spoken Soft (romance)

Approval

Vatna approves of helping spirits and learning about various sources of magic. She appreciates when the Inquisitor regards her beliefs with respect. She favors a direct approach to solving problems.

If a quest involves spirits, the changes in Vatna’s approval occur even if she’s not in the active party.

Approval Gained

Main quests:

Allying with the rebel mages at the end of “In Hushed Whispers” - Approves.

Saying “Corypheus must be stopped” when accepting the title of Inquisitor - Greatly Approves.

Killing Florianne de Chalons during “Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts” - Approves.

Letting Celene execute Gaspard at the end of “Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts” - Approves.

Allowing the Grey Wardens to join the Inquisition at the end of “Here Lies the Abyss” - Slightly Approves.

Siding with Abelas at the Temple of Mythal during “What Pride Had Wrought” - Approves.

Drinking from the Well of Sorrows - Approves.

Allowing Morrigan to drink from the Well of Sorrows - Slightly Approves.

Side quests:

Discovering the landmarks associated with “Saga of Tyrdda Bright-Axe, Avvar-Mother” in the Hinterlands - Slightly Approves at each one.

Equipping her with Tyrdda’s Staff - Greatly Approves (this initiates a special cutscene).

Completing “Ballad of Lord Woolsley” in the Hinterlands by returning the ram to One Eyed Jim - Slightly Approves.

Completing “Trouble with Wolves” in the Hinterlands - Approves.

Destroying the summoning stones in Solas’ personal quest “All New, Faded for Her” - Greatly Approves.

Defeating Hand of Korth during “Lost Souls” in Fallow Mire - Greatly Approves.

Recruiting Amund into the Inquisition - Approves.

Completing “Burdens of Command” in Crestwood by fulfilling the request of the Spirit of Command - Approves.

Investigating Chateau d'Onterre in the Emerald Graves and killing the Arcane Horror that lurks there - Approves.

Completing “Call Me Imshael” in Emprise du Lion by killing Imshael - Approves.

Making Erimond tranquil in his judgement - Approves.

Completing “Fears of the Dreamers” in the Fade section of “Here Lies the Abyss” - Approves.

Jaws of Hakkon DLC:

Killing Hakkon’s dragon host - Greatly Approves.

Defeating Gurd Harofsen - Greatly Approves.

Rescuing Storvacker - Greatly Approves.

Accepting Runa's offer to be included in her prayer at the end of "Up and Away" - Approves.

Completing "The Loss of a Friend" by killing Grandin - Approves.

Telling Sigrid to talk to the augur at the end of “In Exile” - Greatly Approves.

Recruiting Sigrid into the Inquisition at the end of "In Exile" - Approves.

Speaking to Telana’s spirit: “You can rest now.” - Approves.

Completing “Hakkon’s Trials” - Slightly Approves.

Saying “Renewal?” when asked by the augur about the purpose of the rituals during “It Remains to be Seen”, showing that you understood it - Approves.

Giving the offering to the Master of the Hunt at the end of “A Father’s Name” - Approves.

Giving the offering to Finn at the end of “A Father’s Name” - Slightly Approves.

Saying “I am honored.” when accepting the legend-mark - Approves.

Approval Lost

Main quests:

Allying with the Templars at the end of “Champions of the Just” - Disapproves.

Saying “I’ll do it for my own power” when accepting the title of Inquisitor - Greatly Disapproves.

Arresting Florianne de Chalons during “Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts” instead of killing her - Slightly Disapproves.

Making Gaspard the sole ruler of Orlais - Greatly Disapproves.

Banishing the Grey Wardens at the end of “Here Lies the Abyss” - Disapproves.

Refusing to side with Abelas at the Temple of Mythal during “What Pride Had Wrought” - Disapproves.

Suggesting that the Well of Sorrows should be destroyed during “What Pride Had Wrought” - Disapproves.

Side quests:

Attacking Lord Woolsley during “Ballad of Lord Woolsley”, which causes him to transform into a Rage Demon - Greatly Disapproves.

Killing the Pride Demon in “All New, Faded for Her” without attempting to destroy the summoning stones - Greatly Disapproves.

Accepting any of Imshael’s offers in “Call me Imshael” - Greatly Disapproves.

Refusing to complete the request of the Spirit of Command during “Burdens of Command” in Crestwood - Disapproves.

Jaws of Hakkon DLC:

Refusing Runa's offer to be included in her prayer at the end of "Up and Away" - Disapproves.

Completing "The Loss of a Friend" by allowing Grandin to live - Greatly Disapproves.

Speaking to Telana’s spirit - “Leave, or be destroyed.” - Disapproves (If Cole or Solas are in the party, there’s an additional approval loss.)

Saying “I didn’t understand it.” or “Just tell me.” when asked by the augur about the purpose of the rituals during “It Remains to be Seen” - Disapproves.

If the player has killed any benevolent spirit, or Cole was expelled from the Inquisition, a special cutscene triggers upon the next return to Skyhold, in which Vatna threatens to leave the organization. She can be convinced to stay if her personal quest was initiated, or cast out right there and then.

If Vatna’s approval gets critically low, a cutscene will be initiated on the Skyhold battlements, where Vatna confronts the Inquisitor about their choices. She voices her regret about ever joining the Inquisition, saying that she would have fared better if she was on her own. The player can try to change her mind or tell her to leave, either way, the final result stays the same, with Vatna storming out of Skyhold, cursing the Inquisitor’s name.

Romance

Vatna is a potential love interest for male Inquisitors only.

The romance can be initiated after winning Vatna’s approval and completing her personal questline, including the approval-dependent conversation at the end of “Strong from Struggle”. Beforehand, there are several flirtatious dialogue options that can be chosen during conversations with Vatna, but she always swiftly changes the topic to something else, both in the case of male and female Inquisitors. Picking the flirtatious options doesn’t garner either approval or disapproval from Vatna, aside from a flirt line that can occur after rescuing the Avvar during “Fraught with Fury”, which results in “Disapproves” and a harsher reply.

Should the Inquisitor continue flirting with Vatna after her personal quest, she will eventually approach them in their quarters and express her intention to speak about the nature of their relationship. She and the Inquisitor go on a walk in the mountains surrounding Skyhold.

If the Inquisitor is female, Vatna gently tells her that she is not romantically interested in women, but she hopes to remain friends. She wishes the female Inquisitor good luck in her future pursuits. The Inquisitor may voice their dissatisfaction, to which Vatna will take offence, saying that she never hinted she was interested in the Inquisitor. Otherwise, they part on friendly terms.

If the Inquisitor is male, Vatna informs him that she indeed feels a connection between them, something more than friendship, but that she fears it might not be enough for him. Hesitating, she explains that she doesn’t experience sexual attraction, not towards the Inquisitor, nor anyone else she ever met in her life. In the past, she was romantically attracted to a man, someone she knew very well and cared for dearly, but in the end, the relationship didn’t work out, and she felt it was her fault. After sharing her point of view, Vatna asks the Inquisitor about their thoughts, saying she prefers to end it there and then if he finds such a situation an insurmountable obstacle.

At this point, the Inquisitor may disengage from the conversation, which ends the romance path, and depending on the dialogue option chosen, results in no approval change (and they part on friendly terms) or “Greatly Disapproves” from Vatna (if she was told she is “cold-hearted”).

However, if the Inquisitor decides to pursue the relationship, he and Vatna return to Skyhold together.

The party banter and ambient comments suggest that Vatna and the Inquisitor spend a lot of time together, which causes many rumours, especially among the Orlesian nobility visiting Skyhold. The companions may remark about the relationship and try to elicit a response from either Vatna or the Inquisitor, but Vatna always cuts them off.

One night, Vatna suddenly wakes up the Inquisitor, asking him if he remembers anything unusual from his recent dreams. If a mage, the Inquisitor may describe his dreams in more detail, if a non-mage, he may say that he vaguely recalls some dream (there are several options to choose from, including humorous options), either way, Vatna replies this is not what she meant. She explains that suspects a spirit is observing both her and the Inquisitor, but the being always hides away when she or her falcon try to approach it. She wishes to learn what the spirit wants and ask the Inquisitor for aid. If the Inquisitor agrees to her request, Vatna performs a ritual to send their minds into the Fade. Vatna and the Inquisitor investigate the magical landscape together, and eventually they manage to track down the spirit, which turns out to be a young Spirit of Love that became fascinated with the various types of relationships that formed in Skyhold and took particular interest in the bond between Vatna and the Inquisitor. Vatna encourages the spirit to cultivate its interest in love, as its kind is small in numbers.

After the final battle with Corypheus, Vatna shares a hug with the Inquisitor. Once the Inquisitor leaves the feast, she follows him upstairs, and they watch the sunrise together.

In Trespasser, Vatna reunites with the Inquisitor. Unlike in the non-romanced scenario, she is fully expected to arrive in the Winter Palace, and she exchanges warm greetings with the Inquisitor. As the Anchor grows more volatile, she actually succeeds in calming it, though only temporarily. Before the Inquisitor steps through the eluvian to meet Solas, Vatna makes him swear an oath that he will come back alive.

The epilogue shows that Vatna and the Inquisitor live in the Frostback Mountains.

Quotes

“The messengers of the Lady of the Skies led me here.”

“My mentor said that Fate is not written in stone.”

(To Cole) “You alone should choose which path you’ll follow.”

Trivia

All titles of quests that involve Vatna are taken from the Saga of Tyrdda Bright-Axe, Avvar-Mother.

In the promotional materials. Vatna is referred to as “The Forecaster”.

She is accompanied by a peregrine falcon and has a couple of its feathers attached to her clothes.

Vatna is classified as a mage, but she can be equipped both with staffs and melee weapons. Her skills are similar to that of Amund from Dragon Age: Inquisition Multiplayer.

Vatna acts friendly towards Cole, Solas, and Varric from the beginning. Over the consecutive banters, she warms up towards Cassandra, Iron Bull, and Blackwall.

In her location-specific remarks, she often comments on the weather and the behaviour of local birds.

If a quest involves spirits, the changes in Vatna’s approval occur even if she’s not in the active party, similar to how Cole’s approval can change in a number of quests without him being present.

She is the only companion that doesn’t have an approval change in Trespasser when the Inquisitor declares their intent about either saving or hunting down Solas.

[365days365movies]

March 12, 2021: Jason and the Argonauts (1963) (Part One)

I am so goddamn excited for this one.

Back to Greek mythology, my first mythological love! And not just Greek mythology, because this...THIS...this is the first true Avengers story. Oh, yeah, like The Avengers.

After all, mythology produced the first equivalent of our modern superheroes, with demigods and legends that wield fantastic abilities and powerful items to fight the forces of evil. I mean, it’s the most superhero thing I can think of, and it’s literally a story as old as time. Fact of the matter is, I love superheroes, and I love mythology. Which is why I’m excited to finally see an adaptation of one of the biggest superhero team-up stories ever: Jason and the Argonauts!

See, it all starts with Hera, queen of the Olympians and petty as FUCK.

See, the newly (and wrongfully) ascended king of Iolcus, Pelias, honored the gods after stealing the throne from his brother. Well, all of the gods except Hera. So, Hera, rightfully pissed off, decides to fuck Pelias over by recruiting his nephew, Jason. Jason’s a naturally hot blonde kid who was raised by the centaur Chiron, also making him wise...theoretically.

Hera tests this kid, and he passes, so she gives him her favor, and tells him to fuck up his uncle. Jason arrives in Iolcus, and demands the throne from Pelias. His uncle agrees, IF he can bring back the Golden Fleece, a legendary treasure that is guarded by a vicious monster and a zealous king. Pelias didn’t think Jason had any chance, but Jason had the gods on his side. They sent their best subjects to his aid, and Jason procured an awesome ship, the Argo. So, who’s coming to help? Oh, you ready for this? ARGONAUTS ASSEMBLE

Now there are anywhere between 46-85 heroes that are assembled in the Argonauts, with different members in different iterations of the myth. But the big members are:

Heracles, son of Zeus, with the strength of a thousand men

Orpheus, son of the muse Calliope, and master musician

Calais and Zetes, sons of the North Wind, with the ability to fly upon it

Atalanta, the swift-footed huntress, and only female member

Castor and Pollux, twin half-brothers (yeah, really) and horse-riders

Theseus, son of Poseidon, and slayer of the Minotaur

Tip of the iceberg there, but you get the point: we’ve got a superhero team on our hands! And these heroes would perform MANY great deeds on their journey to the Fleece. They fought the Harpies to defend an oracle, they passed the dangerous Clashing Rocks, they battled the Stymphalian Birds, with feathers of metal. Sirens, fire-breathing bulls, and a giant bronze man named Talos.

Different one. Eventually, they procured the Golden Fleece on the island of Colchis, where they fought a dragon with a help of the young sorceress (and niece of Circe), Medea. She fell in love with Jason, and the two fled the island, married, and had twins. Only for Medea to reveal herself as a stone-cold sociopath, and only for Jason to ditch her for another woman. That goes...VERY badly for Jason. Breaking off his marriage pisses off Hera, THE GODDESS OF MARRIAGE, and he dies sad and alone after Medea does...Medea does a lot, I’ll just leave it at that. Jason, completely fucked at that point, takes a nap at the foot of the now rotting Argo, which collapses on top of him and kills him.

For the record, I truncated that story A LOT. There’s a lot to it, but I have a movie to watch, goddamit! And I’m really excited because this is my first Harryhausen movie! You know, Ray Harryhausen, one of the early greats of practical special effects in film? A specialist in stop-motion from its earliest days, he revolutionizes the art throughout films in the 1950s and 1960s, with this one being one of the most successful. You’ve definitely seen his influence, from stuff that he’s done directly...

...to those inspired by him and his methodology...

...to the arts that were descended indirectly from his groundbreaking effects.

Oh yeah, I’m fucking GOING THERE. Fun fact: Ray Winston Studios, a stop-motion group active during the ‘80s and ‘90s, and a descendant of Harryhausen’s works, were originally going to do the animation for the dinosaurs in this movie, in Claymation. However, the recent advent of advanced animatronics, alongside ILM’s founding, caused them to take some of those principles, and apply them to CGI and animatronics. So, yeah, I’m claiming an indirect connection here!

Anyway, enough being a nerd, LET’S WATCH THE GODDAMN MOVIE! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

As the bombastic and epic score plays, the credits role of a Greek-style fresco, detailing the various adventures of the Argonauts. And before the movie starts, I come to a realization: there is a high chance that I’m going to hate this movie’s inaccuracies to Greek mythology. It’s not impossible. I’m real persnickety about my mythology adaptations, just warning you all now. I’ll probably get into it in this Recap, too. Full goddamn warning.

We begin with a seer, reading the future for the treacherous Pelias (Douglas Witmer). He sees first a Golden Fleece at the end of the world, but Pelias ignores this, and asks of his upcoming conquest of the kingdom of...Thessaly. Not, uh...not Iolcus. Mmmkay.

The seer fortells that Pelias will seize the throne, by force, from his brother and the king of Thessaly...Aristo...not Aeson. OK then. The seer says that he will be successful, but will eventually fall to one of Aristo’s kids, who will take his throne. He has two daughters, Philomena and Briseis, and one son, Jason. Looks like they’re gonna die, too.

The invasion begins! Amongst the chaos, Briseis (Davina Taylor) takes her baby sister, Philomena, into the temple of Hera, and pleads to her for her protection. However, they’re found by Pelias, who asks who she is. He’s interrupted by a priestess of Hera, who claims that the Queen Goddess has answered the girl’s prayer for protection.

Pelias responds in kind.

Well...I’m sure that’s gonna piss off Hera. He claims it to be the will of Zeus, but she states that it is his will, not Zeus’. The gods have abandoned him, and he will one day fall to a one-sandaled man, Jason. And as the woman reveals this...she disappears. Nice. FUCKIN’ NICE.

This “priestess” is Hera (Honor Blackman), of course. She goes to her husband, Zeus (Niall MacGinnis), and asks if he ordered Pelias to destroy and profane her temple. He says no, as that was Pelias’ attempt to stave off his inevitable fall by Jason. However, Jason has escaped Pelias’ wrath, as has his sister Philomena. Hera decided, however, that she wants to take down Pelias, and Jason is the best was for that to happen. Hence, she wishes to sponsor Jason.

However, Zeus, being the classic misogynist, says that he will allow it, but she may only help Jason 5 times, once for each time that the fallen Briseis prayed to her. She agrees, and waits 20 years to start fuckin’ with Pelias. Pelias, meanwhile, is growing more paranoid over the one-sandaled man prophecy that Hera gave him.

One day, on the bank of a river, Hera appears to make Pelias fall off of his horse into the river. He’s saved from drowning by a young man, who loses his sandal in the process. This is, of course, Jason (Todd Armstrong), who was already on his way to see Pelias for some reason.

For the record, this is an adaptation of the original story, in which Hera disguises herself as an old beggar-woman, and Jason proves himself to her by helping her across the river, after which she gives him her favor. To be honest, I like this a bit more, or at least as much.

Pelias brings Jason back to a camp for a celebration, with him as an honored guest. Jason reveals exactly who he is, and that he was raised outside of the city by one of his father’s loyal soldiers. He has come to reclaim his right place as king of Thessaly, and to restore it to it’s rightful glory. However, Pelias hasn’t revealed himself as king, and asks Jason how he plans to accomplish these feats. Jason replies with his ultimate plan: obtain the Golden Fleece.

Here’s the deal about the Golden Fleece. One of the most legendary items in Greek mythology, the fleece is essentially a symbol of royalty, and is the coat of a ram with wings found on the island of Colchis. Now, the meaning of the fleece has long been debated, with the main consensus stating that it’s a symbol of royalty. However, some claim that it’s a symbol of prosperous farming (golden grains of wheat), the forgiveness of the gods for some unknown deed, Zeus in the form of a ram, or simply the promise of the unknown at the edge of the world.

What it DEFINITELY ISN’T is a magical healing garment, as Jason claims it to be. But OK, whatever, we need a good reason to get the Fleece, sure. Pelias, not revealing himself, says that Jason should try to get the Fleece, with a boat and a crew, and bring it back to Thessaly, returning and killing Pelias in order to take the throne. Of course, Pelias thinks that this is impossible, which he says to his son Acastus (Gary Raymond). He also knows that if he kills Jason, he it will mean his own destruction, as Hera told him.

Jason goes to ponder this journey, only to encounter the seer. The seer asks if he has come to pray to the gods, to which Jason states that he doesn’t believe in them, nor does he have cause to. The seer offers to give him that cause, and reveals himself as Hermes (Michael Gwynn), the swift-footed messenger god, god of medicine, and trickster god of the Olympians.

Hermes isn’t usually directly involved in the myths of Jason, but that’s OK. He also does something particularly unusual, and brings Jason TO Olympus to meet the Gods themselves. Which, uh...yeah, hot damn. Zeus and the rest arranged for Hermes to bring Jason to them. They ask how they can help him on his quest. Zeus offers him a ship and crew, but Jason refuses, much to the gall of EVERYBODY.

Hera helps him by telling him where to find the Golden Fleece: the island of Colchis, at the other end of the world. To get there, though, Jason’ll DEFINITELY need a ship. He decides to go to the shipbuilders of Greece, and tell them that great treasure lies on Colchis, and they may receive some for their aid. As for the crew, he’s got a similar tactic. Offer the reward to the athletes and heroes of Greece, who will compete in games to determine their eligibility.

Not from the original myths...but it actually makes a lot of sense. Goddamn, is this going to be a good adaptation? I’m excited! The games are held, and many athletes win their place on the journey. They include: Castor and Pollux (Ferdinando Poggi and John Crawford), Acastus, and of course, Heracles (Nigel Green). And yeah, he’s called Hercules here, but I don’t care.

When Hercules arrives, this grabs the attention of the young Hylas (John Caimey), who arrived to late to compete in the games. He challenges Heracles to something, believing that beating Heracles in something will guarantee him a place on the ship. 

While everyone mocks this, Heracles agrees to go up against him in a discus-throwing contest. They must hit or pass a rock in the ocean by throwing their discus. Heracles hits it easily, of course. And the frail Hylas...

...Nice. Did not see that coming, and that’s actually very smart. Also takes a lot of skill, because I could NOT do that. Hylas wins his place in the ship, to the delight of both the crowd and the Olympians. And yes, Hylas actually is a companion of Heracles in the original stories, so that’s neat!

Now for the boat, being built by master builder Argus (Laurence Naismith), who is coming on the ship with them. He notes that something appears to have guided his hand during the ship’s construction. In the original myth, that would be Athena. However, here, it’s probably Hera, as the figurehead is specifically carved in her image. And is also...alive?

Well...to be fair, in many myths, the ship contains wood built from a magical tree that could speak, and see the future. So, OK, magic ship, fair enough. Well, hopefully, that ship’s guidance will happen soon, as the voyage immediately proves difficult. No water, no rest, and frustrated men.

Jason asks the figurehead for help (which would be help #3) and Hera speaks through it to tell Jason to head to the Isle of Bronze, where Hephaestus once had his forge. However, the island is lorded over by a powerful something called Talos. I know what Talos is, but the movie hasn’t revealed him yet.

The Argo makes its way to the island, and the men head ashore to get food and water. They see goats there, which will provide them both food and drink, and Heracles and Hylas chase after them for just that aim. And that’s when they blunder into a giant bronze statuary, lorded over by the statue of Talos.

The two enter a chamber in the statue’s base, which is filled to the brim with gold and treasure. However, Jason warned the men of the Argo not to take anything from the island but food and water. Hylas remembers this, but Heracles doesn’t care, and takes a golden staff from the chamber. And Talos...Talos doesn’t appreciate that.

Oh, that’s a great place to take a break! See you in Part Two!

[richincolor]

We've got six books on our radar this week! Did we miss anything? What's on your TBR list?

The Other Side of Perfect by Mariko Turk Little Brown/Poppy

Alina Keeler was destined to dance, but one terrifying fall shatters her leg--and her dreams of a professional ballet career along with it.

After a summer healing (translation: eating vast amounts of Cool Ranch Doritos and binging ballet videos on YouTube), she is forced to trade her pre-professional dance classes for normal high school, where she reluctantly joins the school musical. However, rehearsals offer more than she expected--namely Jude, her annoyingly attractive cast mate she just might be falling for.

But to move forward, Alina must make peace with her past and face the racism she had grown to accept in the dance industry. She wonders what it means to yearn for ballet--something so beautiful, yet so broken. And as broken as she feels, can she ever open her heart to someone else?

Where the Rhythm Takes You by Sarah Dass Balzer + Bray

Seventeen-year-old Reyna has spent most of her life at her family’s gorgeous seaside resort in Tobago, the Plumeria. But what once seemed like paradise is starting to feel more like purgatory. It’s been two years since Reyna’s mother passed away, two years since Aiden – her childhood best friend, first kiss, first love, first everything – left the island to pursue his music dreams. Reyna’s friends are all planning their futures and heading abroad. Even Daddy seems to want to move on, leaving her to try to keep the Plumeria running.

And that's when Aiden comes roaring back into her life – as a VIP guest at the resort.

Aiden is now one-third of DJ Bacchanal – the latest, hottest music group on the scene. While Reyna has stayed exactly where he left her, Aiden has returned to Tobago with his Grammy-nominated band and two gorgeous LA socialites. And he may (or may not be) dating one of them…

Inspired by Jane Austen's Persuasion, Where the Rhythm Takes You is a romantic, mesmerizing novel of first love and second chances.

From Little Tokyo, with Love by Sarah Kuhn Viking Books for Young Readers

If Rika’s life seems like the beginning of a familiar fairy tale–being an orphan with two bossy cousins and working away in her aunts’ business–she would be the first to reject that foolish notion. After all, she loves her family (even if her cousins were named after Disney characters), and with her biracial background, amazing judo skills and red-hot temper, she doesn’t quite fit the princess mold.

All that changes the instant she locks eyes with Grace Kimura, America’s reigning rom-com sweetheart, during the Nikkei Week Festival. From there, Rika embarks on a madcap adventure of hope and happiness–searching for clues about her long-lost mother, exploring Little Tokyo’s hidden treasures with a cute actor, and maybe…finally finding a sense of belonging.

But fairy tales are fiction and the real world isn’t so kind. Rika knows she’s setting herself up for disappointment, because happy endings don’t happen to girls like her. Should she walk away before she gets in even deeper, or let herself be swept away?

Illusionary (Hollow Crown #2) by Zoraida Cordova Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

Reeling from betrayal at the hands of the Whispers, Renata Convida is a girl on the run. With few options and fewer allies, she's reluctantly joined forces with none other than Prince Castian, her most infuriating and intriguing enemy. They're united by lofty goals: find the fabled Knife of Memory, kill the ruthless King Fernando, and bring peace to the nation. Together, Ren and Castian have a chance to save everything, if only they can set aside their complex and intense feelings for each other.

With the king's forces on their heels at every turn, their quest across Puerto Leones and beyond leaves little room for mistakes. But the greatest danger is within Ren. The Gray, her fortress of stolen memories, has begun to crumble, threatening her grip on reality. She'll have to control her magics--and her mind--to unlock her power and protect the Moria people once and for all.

For years, she was wielded as weapon. Now it's her time to fight back.

Angel & Hannah: A Novel in Verse by Ishle Park One World

Hannah, a Korean American girl from Queens, New York, and Angel, a Puerto Rican boy from Brooklyn, fall in love in the spring of 1993. Hannah, who comes from a strict Korean home, meets Angel, a free and beautiful boy, at a quinceañera:

Beyond flushed, sweating bodies pushed, pushing like cattle below black & buzzing speakers, under a torn pink streamer loose as a tendril of hair--lush-- his eyes. Darkluminous. Warm. A blush floods her. Hannah sucks in her breath, but can't pull back. Music fades. A hush he's a young buck in the underbrush, still in a disco ball dance of shadow & light Their forbidden love instantly and wildly blooms along the Jackie Robinson Expressway.

Told in seasons Angel & Hannah holds all of the tension and cadence of blank verse while adding dynamic and expressive language, creating new kinds of engrossing and magnetic forms. The hip-hop sonnets and poems are dynamic, arresting, observant, and magical, conveying the intimacies and sacrifices of love and addiction and the devastating realities of struggle and loss.

Committed to cultural details and the vernacular of Queens and Brooklyn, this is a hip-hop love story, not of the Capulets and the Montagues, but two New York City kids trying to survive and grow within their families and communities, driven by an all-consuming love.

The Eid Gift: An Adam and Zayneb Story by S.K. Ali Simon & Schuster

Even though it’s during Ramadan, a month of fasting and spiritual devotion, A and Z can’t help spending any and all free time with each other. Enter parents and their idea for a nikah at the end of Ramadan, on Eid day itself.

Which would appear to be the greatest Eid gift of all — except that, unbeknownst to each other, A and Z have been working on spectacularly surprising Eid gifts for the other all along.

The only thing? In true “The Gift of the Magi” fashion, these Eid gifts are at complete odds with the other. Along with a nikah day over-run with “benevolent” family interferences, A and Z are up for either recording this Eid as the best one ever, as a real marvel...or as a completely upsetting oddity.

Author's Note: WHEN IT TAKES PLACE:

The Eid Gift is a part of the Love from A to Z storyline; it occurs shortly before the epilogue. (If you haven’t read Love from A to Z yet, please consider doing so before reading this story—some of what occurs will not make sense otherwise.)

SOMETHING TO KEEP IN MIND:

While there’s nothing explicit in the story, it is more mature than S. K. Ali’s previous YA novels—there’s more physical touch here than in Love from A to Z— so readers are asked to exercise awareness of their reading comfort zones.

[sigurdjarlson]

Started getting emotional thinking about Diily visiting the orphanage in Stormwind when she’s in town

It started after one of those children’s holidays one year and became a thing where she visits once in a while and tells them about whatever adventures she’s been having.

And Brightheart and Wildheart, big babies that they are, patiently let the kids pet them and tumble all over them her, purring softly.

(The lady who runs the orphanage was understandably more than a bit nervous about this at first but now is cool with it after Diily demonstrated they are harmless when not in battle)

Brightheart already has lots of experience with kids tumbling all over her, accidentally pulling on her fur and tail, just generally being kids…she experienced all that with the three Wintermoon girls growing up so she doesn’t even blink.

She’s just like “oh little small eared children hello” (after Teldrassil suddenly there are more than a few night elf children there too though..)

And frankly Diily does it because she knows what it’s like to be an orphan and these kids don’t..don’t really have anyone?

Mother mode activated

(It’s healing for her in a lot of ways)

But Ladelia is absolutely annoyed when she’s not explicitly invited (Diily doesn’t really think to do so because it’s become her thing she does on her spare time) and invites herself along

She’s a mage. She is literally a walking carnival of tricks and fun. She can make treats! (Not even just mana ones! She’s a great cook!!) She can do all kinds of cool..magic stuff.

And she’s goofy and fun and Diily’s heart is so warm watching her entertain them. Why she didn’t think to have her tag along she doesn’t know. (Maybe a part of her was being defensive of her own healing wounds)

Alaluria…avoids it at first despite being asked to come because..look at her. She isn’t exactly excited at the prospect of terrifying little kids with the whole demonic appearance thing (because regardless of how much she would deny it, it hurts to be seen as a monster)

And frankly she’s not naturally good with kids like the other two are. She’s not bad with them. As prickly as she can be she’d never be cruel to a child. Just a little awkward like she isn’t sure what to do with them lmao.

But you know, kids are always more accepting than you’d think. They’ve seen all kinds of people growing up in Stormwind (demon hunters included)

She ends up being good with them in her own way.

(She doesn’t want to ever have kids of her own and she won’t. She’s perfectly satisfied with being the Cool Aunt to the kids Diily and Ladelia may have in the future)

They’re so interested in her wings and she can’t help but find it endearing. “That’s so cool!” Yes, she can fly..watch this. Haha!!

And okay maybe demonstrating some of her powers at their request was a bit much, Miss Orphanage Lady but they asked.. ( and they thought the eye beam was so cool!!!)

And if she feels a less and less like a monster after these visits..well she keeps it to herself <3

I just 🥺 it would be so good and healing for all three of them and the kids too.

And naturally they’re all good at their respective professions (Skinning/Leather Working, Enchanting/Tailoring, Mining/Jewelcrafting) so they often bring stuff for them.

Little gifts, toys, clothes, etc. (Thinking about the Darkmoon Fair quest where you make toy prizes)

Alaluria is just like hey look at this gem I found the other day and it’s expensive and rare but one of the kids is fawning over it so she really doesn’t give a damn about it’s worth. Take it. Keep it or pawn it for some gold to spend at the market, she doesn’t mind either way.

Ladelia is..not allowed to enchant their shoes to make them run extremely fast anymore

But pieces of clothing that are enchanted to keep you extra warm, or other normal things? Definitely.

She does create light up magic shoes tho and that’s really fucking cool to the kids. (Dkdkdkdkf)

And now there are more kitties to cuddle. Well, Shadowclaw is a little intimidating at first, being a felsaber but like with Alaluria, the kids don’t seem particularly fazed.

Shadow just lays there patiently and she isn’t as pleasant to pet as her siblings and mother. She no longer has fur, she’s bone and scaly skin, but they seem to like her anyway.

Morningflower is an angel, very playful like Ladelia she’s always tumbling around with them, (always gentle, claws always sheathed, she’s aware of her size in comparison)

(they are all very well behaved sabers thank you very much)

And Alaluria has a knack for getting the quiet ones, the troublesome ones who are known for their acting out and temper tantrums and getting them to open up. And hey kid..I get it, you’re angry and you know what? that’s alright but..let’s find a better way to let it out?

(Although not through demon killing like her..like actual healthy coping mechanisms..she may have had to ask around to figure out what those would be first actually oops)

Maybe, it’s the survivalist/huntress in Diily but she’s immediately like..these children need basic survival skills ASAP. She somehow manages to make teaching basic first aid fun though. (With Ladelia’s help)

[caithyra]

Cinder’s Backstory...

...Is probably one of the most superficial Cinderella stories I’ve ever heard of. It completely ignores most about the original story except what happens at the very surface.

Basically, Cinderella at its core is a riches-to-rags-to-riches story. It is also notable that it is a fairy tale in which the main character (Cinderella) never grows as a character or learns a moral, because she is an already perfect and moral person. She was born that way, just as how she was born into a rich family, and when the natural order is disturbed by her evil stepmother and sisters by putting her in rags, Cinderella persists in being herself, remembering her birth parents and being kind and virtuous and moral and upstanding, and as such, through a fairy godmother/guardian angel/bio-mom’s ghost, gets to go to the ball, meet the prince, and eventually be married into her natural state of living in riches again.

Now, those themes and that moral is a bit outdated, however, when you boil Cinderella down to its distilled form, you have a story about a character who have something by birth, loses it, and regains it.

Combining them with Cinder’s relentless quest for power, I propose that a better Cinderella story for her would have been a powerful-powerless-powerful backstory.

We already know, through Marcus Black, that there are Semblances capable of stealing/locking/destroying others’ Semblances. What if Cinder’s stepmother had one like that? A Semblance that locks away another’s Semblance.

Lets say Cinder’s Semblance is considered rare and precious because it is so versatile and useful for a huntress. Meanwhile, her stepsisters’ Semblances are pretty standard, but without Cinder around their skills would have made up for it, but with Cinder around, yeah... Cinder’s clique at battle school bullies them relentlessly (because she’s Cinder, and Cinder has shown literally zero kindness in the entire series).

And then Cinder’s dad dies, and stepmom immediately locks away Cinder’s Semblance. Stepsisters at school turns Cinder’s clique on her, and stepmom no longer buys new clothes and such for Cinder, making her an even bigger target for bullying.

Then, one day, Cinder runs away from home and ends up going to where her mother (a huntress) died (it should look a bit like Summer’s grave cliff to reflect her future rivalry with Ruby). And there she is cornered by Grimm and “rescued” by Salem (fairy godmother). Salem temporarily unlocks Cinder’s Semblance, but warns her that if her stepmother is not dead by midnight, it will be locked away again.

So Cinder kills her stepfamily, and takes on a new name (her birth-name would have been Ella) and new identity to hide it by Watts (who suggests the name “Fall” showing exactly why Salem, Watts, Tyrian and Hazel are recruiting this young girl to the viewers). She goes on the run and meets her “prince”, a huntsman, who she likes a lot, but he finds out about her murdering ways (maybe by matching her footprint to a bloody footprint on the crime scene photos), and she kills him, but nearly dies as he is a professional huntsman and she’s basically a high school dropout, and again goes to her mom’s last resting place and meets Salem again, and she accuses Salem of ruining her life.

Salem disagrees and tells her that she’s given Cinder opportunities, and then goes, “would like an opportunity for more power? To wield true magic?”

And Cinder goes, “tell me more.”

It would explain her motivations, why she works for Salem, and why she keeps losing despite her Maiden powers.

Also, it goes without saying that Salem lied about the midnight deadline, but Cinder will never know that except maybe just before her death (that she could have just left with her Semblance and lived happily ever after).

[pencilwritesshiz47]

The Fourth Arrives

MGR Chapter Six

[Previous] [Next] [Masterpost]

TW: Mentions of destruction and fire

Marigold was tired.

And she didn't mean the sleepy sort of tired (although she was that as well).

No, this kind of tiredness was different. It was more like feeling drained, like something had sucked the energy out of her.

At first, she had just thought it was the empty feeling that came after Goldie had been gone for three days with no contact. That would have made sense. But that feeling was different. Empty, and missing. But it was only a piece of her life's puzzle, while this... this was the puzzle itself.

So that left the only other possibility-- that she was magically drained. She had been blasting raw elemental power into the water to propel the boat for hours now, a task that should have been easy and effortless. But it seemed to be taking a toll on her, something that should only happen to elementists, who had limited powers. These things just didn't happen to sprites. And that worried her.

So, she tried not to think of it. She focused on moving the boat forwards, and if her mind wandered too far, she would just bring it back again.

It was during one of these times that Lauren spoke up, maybe at around 2 or 3 in the morning.

"There's someone here."

Lady Elisabeth sighed from the other end of the boat. "How in the world could there be a fourth person? That makes no sense."

Marigold had her back turned to them, but she could feel the stare Lauren was giving her from where she knelt.

"I dunno. There just... is one."

And if this were anyone else, Marigold would have dismissed it out of hand. Anyone would. But this was Lauren, who always seemed to know just when someone was sneaking up on her, to a point where it was kind of intimidating. So, if she said there was a fourth person, there was one.

The boat fell silent.

"Then what do we do about it?" Marigold finally asked.

Silence again.

"Well, uh, we should... wait, no... oh..." Lauren stammered, trying to come up with a response. Her instincts may have been great, but when she needed to come up with a plan on the fly? That was more Goldie's department.

"Is anyone there?" the noblewoman finally asked, and Marigold held her breath, hoping it was nothing malicious.

And then, after a moment, a response came. "Uhh... yeah?"

The voice was young, and they seemed to have a Calinian accent, so at least it (probably) wasn't some sort of terrible creature.

"Do you want to come out?" Marigold asked, stopping her blast, and turning around to face the direction of the voice. "Don't worry, we won't hurt you," she quickly added.

There was a beat of silence, and then, in the back corner of the boat, darkness seemed to lift, revealing a child.

Marigold held back a gasp. This was not just any child—this was Princess Amina.

In the light of the moons, she looked exactly like Marigold always imagined her, yet still totally different.

On TV she had always seemed so regal and fancy—always dressed in frills and makeup. She had always stood still next to her parents as they made important announcements, as if she were just there for decoration. And maybe she was.

But now, she was different. There wasn't a bit of makeup on her face, and she was just wearing a simple purple dress with sleeves that ended just past her elbows. Her jet-black hair was down, and there was something in her brown eyes that seemed so... adventurous.

She quickly raised her hand in a wave. "Hey."

"Sup," Lauren replied, and Marigold groaned internally. You couldn't just say "Sup," to a member of the royal family, could you!?

No one seemed to know what to say for a moment.

"So," Lauren started, and Marigold started praying that she wouldn't get any of them imprisoned. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh..." the princess said, looking down at the bottom of the boat. "I don't think you'd believe me. Heck, I kinda don't believe me either."

Lauren smiled. "Hey, it's alright. Just tell us."

The princess looked up at them. "I, uh, got sent here. By Time."

Marigold wasn't sure how to react to that. It seemed completely unlikely, but then again, she wasn't about to question the future leader of her country. Elisabeth, on the other hand, did not appear to have the same thoughts.

"I'm sorry, you what?" she said, and Amina shrugged.

"Hey, like I said, I don't get it either. All I know is that she told me to find you, and stowaway in this boat. And that I'm part of some solution or whatever. And I think you all are too? It's confusing."

Marigold just looked at her, confused. What was this girl talking about?

"So what are you going to do about that?" Lauren asked.

The young princess looked at her quizzically. "What?"

Lauren shrugged. "If you were sent here on some sort of quest by Time, you must have been told to do something, right?"

"Um... I mean, I got a wooden box?"

Lauren sighed. "Ok, uh, why don't you start from the beginning."

And so, she did. She started from the meeting that she overheard to the part where she sneaked onto their boat. And Marigold was speechless. Time had just shown up and given this girl a quest!? These things didn't happen.

But, then again, a lot of things were happening that really shouldn't be.

"So, what are you going to do now?" Elisabeth asked. "Like Lauren said, you must have some sort of plan."

Amina faltered. "I, uh, didn't think that far ahead."

"You could always come with us," Marigold said, looking at the other two. Elisabeth shrugged.

"Yeah, if you want to, you could," Lauren said, and Amina thought for a moment.

"Umm, sure. What are you all doing anyways?"

The three looked at each other. "Well," Marigold started, "We're going to rescue my lover, Goldie. She's stuck in Xan Ruz."

Amina nodded her head. "Alright then."

And so, they went back to what they were doing, with Marigold propelling the boat, Lauren steering, Elisabeth playing with something in her hands, and Amina sitting in a corner silently.

It took about an hour, but finally, Lauren shouted. "We're here!"

She quickly conjured a rope, tying the boat to shore, then hopped out, with the rest of the party following close behind her.

Elisabeth went up to the front. "Alright, the entrance to the city should be close. Just follow me."

Lauren looked a bit startled by having the control suddenly taken from her, but didn't say anything, just slowed her pace to match Marigold's.

As they walked across the field, Marigold wondered about Goldie. Was she safe? Was she fighting or hiding for her life?

And then the worries about the magically drained feeling she was getting popped back—what was going on? She took a deep breath and tried to focus on the task ahead of her. She just needed to find Goldie. Then everything you would be alright.

"In here," Elisabeth called, and they started to walk though some sort of entrance. And then, suddenly, they all stopped.

Marigold looked up ahead, and gasped. "Oh, Her."

She had known it would be bad. But this?

Buildings were smashed, in, with plumes of smoke coming up from them. She could see small fires on the streets, and large metal orbs stuck in the ground, a few having cracks stretching out from them. There were large pieces of rubble from the top of the cave everywhere, and even as she looked, more pieces started to fall. 

But the worst part was its size. Marigold hadn't realized the city was this big— how on Izan was she supposed to find Goldie?

hope you liked the chapter!!!! trying to get on a sunday schedule, praying that my motivation cooperates heh

Anyways, please let me know:

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also, please remember, reblogs are free, and if you don’t like it you can always delete the post later. it’d be a big help for my account, and thank you!!

Taglist:

@fire-sapphics

@rat-with-coffee

@dirty-racoon

[popculturebuffet]

The Legend of the Three Caballeros: World Tree Caballeros and No Man is an Easter Island  aka Whelp, Xandra Sucks Now.

Salduos Amigos! We’re back.. and today we have two Cabs episodes.. because the top 20 of 2020 list last week took a day longer than expected, so that meant I had a day of my schedule go thbbt and thus had to compress a bit, like the darkwing reviews i’ve done but not NEARLY as much. And if this works out I intend to do more cabs 2 or evne 3 in ones in the future to help speed along the finale. Still giving Kev his 55 bucks worth mind you, just speeding it up a bit in case anything comes back, and because I have a lot of double and triple reviews coming in Feburary due to a very tight schedule, so might as well train for it now.So with that in mind, WELCOME BACK TO THE RIDE OF THE THREE CABLLEROS, and the legend of the three cablleros. I can fit in what little exposition there is on the way, so on with the show after the cut!

World-Tree Caballeros:  We pick up where we left off last time: Sheldgoose and co are returning to earth, and it’s been a few weeks, in story time, with Sheldgoose exausted and hungry and Feldrake.. not exactly getting that minons need food to live and wanting to jump right into destroying the Caballeros since their right next door.  And while ignoring his minon’s basic needs is just.. dumb, I do appricate that Felldrake is the kind of villian who dosen’t stupidly not attack the heroes if he knows where they are and does try blasting them, with Sheldgoose in his cloak of course to avoid any deniablility. I mean Sheldgoose is impossibly wealthy and in disguise here. No court is going to convict him. But there is a reasonable explination why they can’t do that: since Clinton wasn’t stupid he put up magical protections over the Cabana and while Feldrake COULD break them.. he can’t do it with as little power as he currently has in the staff and has an idea where to get it. But Leopold’s bushed from taking them all the way back from space, to Feldrake’s disapointment so Sheldgoose.. simply offers up his private plane, then uses his mass wealth to get them all the way to their destination the World Tree... yes the NORSE World Tree... in italy. 

Yeah you can probably tell there were some rewrites here. This ep, given it features Yddrasil, was SUPPOSED to be about the Norse gods.. but Marvel didn’t want “brand confusion” with  THE MIGHTY THOR!

Which originally I scoffed at a bit. Mostly because why would you, Disney, one of the biggest brands in the world NOT want a potetinal crossover with your other properties? I mean .. is this why we haven’t had mickey and friends in avengers costumes yet? If so... BOOOO. Why would you buy Marvel without this ever happening? You put fucking light sabers in kickin it, one of your lesser live action shows though olivia holt is neat and Rudy was alright, but... you won’t put MIGHTY THOR, in a donald duck series? Especially since you already used marvel in one of your shows?

The cat is out of the bag.. just let crossovers happen dude. Your not giving us any decent marvel animated series, and only What If is on the docket for now the future. WHy not? I wasn’t the fondest of the idea at first but then I realized “Wait this could be awesome and rediculous”. And again you’ve already hit a low bar for using this stuff.. just use it.  That being said, while we’ll get to it in a moment.. I do get WHY they didn’t let them use the norse gods... possibly.. but it does seem like they really dot’ like crossing the streams character wise and that bothers me it bothers me a lot. 

So yeah the world tree is in the snow capped mountains of italy.. which they might have so touche, and the montage of Sheldgoose getting there is great as is Feldrake’s reaction of “Eh i’ts no leopold”. Aw he loves his monkeybatdonkeyrat. So they open the entrance and prepare to go up the massive flight of stairs... only for Sheldgoose to point out the elevator. Which they take instead. I will say Feldrake’s characteriztation.. slipped a bit in these two. It’ snot bad, he’s by now supposed to be someone who WAS so powerful, they don’t get the concept of finesse and it works better next episode.. but hear a good chunk of the episode is just Feldrake shoutng at Sheldgoose and complaning a lot and even at one point tripping over himself with his own stupidity. We’ll get to that. Point is it’s a bit of a step down from last episode but as a result Sheldgoose gets to shine a bit more with Wayne Knight getting more lines to really go full newman and become a smug yet clever jackass. SO it’s a trade off I guess and it does ballance out next time. 

So back at the Cabs Cabana, our heroes are having pop corn fights, which Xandra joins in on... this was the intro but I put it here...

Point is next time we see them our heroes are all cataloging everything with the girls help, including a positivity totem, this generation’s talky toster. Xandra gets enraptured with a phone but gets defensive when being called out of date and mocked by the girls. This is SUPPPOSED to set up a character arc for her and I was excited for Xandra to get an episode but we’ll get to that disappointment soon enough. The point is our team gets the call to adventure. And Xandra’s excited because the roman gods, old friends of hers are at the world tree. The Roman Gods are what the planets are named after and are mushed together with the greek gods for reasons I didn’t have time to look into. This review is late as is. Point is they don’t get used as much likely because of the planet thing and the greek gods having a wider range of gods at that with better names. I mean Hades just.. sounds more godly than Pluto. Posiden sounds just as badass as Neptune if not more and Jupiter just dosen’t have hte same wring Zeus was.  But for today the only Roman Gods present are Jupiter, Venus and Mars, stand ins for Odin, Frigg and THE MIGHTY THOR respectively in this case but still drawn uniquely. She’s excited to show the boys them and ports them. THIS TIME, the port isn’t you know, stupidly placed and the desert thing seems to have been a one off fluke, and easily could’ve been where a city WAS, but again that could’ve been mentioned. Here it’s just at the foot of the stairs which while inconvient, as Xandra didn’t know about the elvator and Panchito gets on it without thinking to tell the other two who are forced to climb, makes sense: it’s risky to have a direct port to a giant tree that grows planets. Which is also awesome. In the wrong hands the raw power of a tiny planet could be devistating, or someone could make their own galaxy with them as god emeprror if given enough time. Which if you know about the world tree and somehow manage to steal enough planets to make a galaxy of your own without getting caught, you clearly will surivive the eons needed for it.. or could just time speed it up. Point is this place is out of the way for a reason this time, elevator or no.  So then we meet the ROMAN GODS... and they’ve not only clearly aged, but have given up fighting for gardening, with Mars being a decript old man who can’t remember xandra’s name, which given she heavily implies they were a thing is not great, and goes on and on about Tubers. Yeahhhh... I can’t exactly blame marvel for NOT wanting one of their biggest characters depiected as a doddering old man obssed with potatoes. LIke the brand confusion thing is still stupid, I want MIckey, Donald and Goofy as Cap, Iron Man and Hulk yesterday you cowards..., but thinking this would be confusing for kids or would hurt the character a bit? yeah fair enough, a bit paranoid but understandable given Marvel is the backbone of the company these days and at this point, had been massively sucessful with avengers and everything. So I do get it even if I don’t get shifting the setting from the world tree, and suspect there they had to rework the episode during production. 

So we not only meet our gods.. and the reason this isn’t the best episode. It’s not the worst, we’ll get there in a moment, but it’s not very good. And the reason... is Xandra. Her reaction to the gods being out of shape and old and retired, tending to the tree and not really fighting or doing hero stuff anymore is to get upset and wonder how her friends and as we learn later inspiration fell this low. That’d be fine and somewhat intresting. Problem is.. the Gods explain they quit after the titan wars which gave Mars some VERY obvious PTSD tha’ts VERY uncomfortably played for laughs. Look in comedy you can joke about just about anything, that’s the nature of it. But there are some things you REALLY need to tread carefully with. Now Family Guy, and this is late seasons “race jokes and shock humor” family guy mind you, somehow got this with Quagmire having ptsd in one episode where the show was set in diffrent time periods... due to hearing fortunate son over and over in vietnam.

This is actually funny, parodies something else, paticually overblown namsplotation in media and overuse of a great song that really dosen’t need to be used ALL the time in everything. This.. is just “HA he’s rattled because he was in a presumibly bloody war wand given ther’es only four gods left, we see one next episode, they probably all died.. and if they are still alive reincarnated.”. It’s just.. uncomfortable and if this bit was taken out, the episode wouldn’t be great, but it wouldn’t be as odious and Xandra HORRIBLY unsympathetic. It’s not helped by the fact that even without the ptsd.. the gods just watn’t to semi retire. They haven’t given up their duty, their still tending to the world tree.. they just dont’ want to fight or quest anymore because they were in a possibly centuries long bloody war that dwinlded their numbers and clearly left mental scars. Xandra comes off like an insenstive ass for putting her old version of them over the new and while the moral’s SUPPOSED TO BE that she shouldn’t cling to the past and had it simply beeen about her realizing she has to let them be who they are now, it would’ve worked.. instead it’s just “You guys suck because you won’t traumatize yourself more. “. The worst they do is hide under a table instead of fight and again, it’s very clear at least one of them if not all have PTSD. The only thing that keeps this from being truly awful is I genuinely don’t think the writers thought out the implicatoins of Mars line, which while still not a great train of thought to have modern writers not get that, it’s better than nothing. It just sinks the entire episode as i’ts emotional core.. comes off as a snotty teenager forcing some old people into combat and getting rewarded for it.  The other side of the plot is not half bad though. The boys catch Feldrake and Sheldgoose trying to steal the planet, with Feldrake enlarging a bunch of termites we’ve been seeing so far in the episode to attack the cabs. But what really shines is the Cabs. They work well as a team, have camradere, face Sheldgoose with no fear and while they do run from the termites, which look HORRIFYING by the way, and then come up with the hairbrained but still not half bad scheme of covering donald and wood and using him as bait. This ends up working since Xandra rallies/guilttrips the gods into ignoring their ptsd and fighting anyway. I mean “Heroically helping them realize they stil have fight and fighting like the heroes she looked up to”... and then we get the climax which is just awesome.  Sheldgoose and Feldrake get the planet afterall raining metors down so while the Roman gods take those out, Xandra calls on the guys to distfract Sheldgoose and Feldrake so she can snipe the planet out of his hands. How do they do this? Juipiter fast ball specials them up to the asteroid he’s on! If your wondering what a Fast Ball special is.. you’ve certianly seen it but here’s a practical demonstration. 

So yeah that. OUr heroes take it in stride though and awesomely use how much Sheldgoose is irritate dby them to distract him by basically playing whack a mole, so he slowly destroys the ground bellow him, and Xandra snipes him, sapping him of his new god-tier power up and causing his platform to crumble, with the boys escaping falling to earth like the two of them thanks to jose hooking the tree with his cain. As I said this episode shows how far the boys have come: from greedy idiots who were scared.. to true heroes ready to step up, running away when tactically advantageous and easily taking on the main villians and coming up with a plan to beat them on the fly. That.. is what I wanted going into the show and if nothing else this episode gives me that. Also the girls talked to xandra earlier and I missed it. Eh. We do get a nice moment though of the boys telling Xandra she does fit in.. with them. And really as far as i’m concerned she’s one of the cabs, so I like this moment a lot.. I just wish it didn’t ring so hollow with everything else going on.  Overall this ep is okay.. it has it’s moments but the Xandra side of thing just.. drains a lot of the life out of it. What COULD’VE been a solid character building episode makes her come off as a selfish, impatient insenstive asshole who’s trying to crowbar the past in instead of accepting her friends as who they’ve become in the centuries she’s been gone, though Sheldgoose and the boys do keep this from being awful. SPEAKING OF AWFUL. 

No Man is an Easter Island: 

This.. was a rough one. Not going to sugarcoat it. This episode was not very good despite some good segments and despite not mocking a serious mental issue, it’s somehow more obnoxious. The PTSD thing was clearly a mistake.. this.. this was intentional. Let’s tear this one apart shall we? So we open with Sheldgoose and Feldrake where they were last time, Easter Island. It turns out in this unvierse hte moai are actually giant stone men and their heads are the only things visable because the rest of hteir body is undreground, stomping out surfer dude lava lizards who want to come to the surface and burn it. Feldrake.. decides this is a great idea and agrees to help, as does sheldgoose. 

Seriously Feldrake wants to CONQUER the world. In fact he did it once already. We’re not talking about someone like say Negaduck, who I talked about earlier this week: while he MIGHT conquer, he gets just as much joy out of mindless violence and would gladly blow up the world him and all just for the hell of it. Feldrake is your classic evil overloard and wants to RULE the world not destroy it and wouldn’t be happy without something to lord over and terrorize. And Sheldgoose wants the same and is presumibly sticking around to backstab his ancestor at the first opportunity to steal his power for his own. How does setting the world on fire, literally, benefit either of them? Sure they COULD take over int he aftermath, but that’s after the lizards have likely destroyed most of the world, not even taking into account the vast amount of water and infastructure and the size of their home means they’ll run out of troops to use as a living bridge, cool as that is, eventually. Humans would have to invent ways to transport them and given as far as I know we have a through understnading of lava and magma, we’d instead be working on weapons. The lizards woul dmake a good army under the right leadership to sidestep this.. but as a world ending threat while they’d still cause untold damage in lives and suffering, I just don’t see them being enough to conquer the world. It just makes no sense.  The one thing that salvages it and this episode is what happens next, which i’m skipping ahead to because it’s my blog and I do this how I want: Feldrake TRIES just shooting the moai with his magic.. but the one he tries it on just has it harmlessly bounce off.. which given their dealing with magical fire creatures makes sense. So Sheldgoose instead steps in to Feldrake’s reluctance.. and shows his own talents. As a university head and professional asshole, he can manipulate with the best and talks the moai’s into taking a vacatoin, using the staff to hyponotize them so they don’t think about the downsides. It’s.. really fucking awesome honestly, and shows off that Sheldgoose is like the boys: a comical moron yes.. but VERY dangerous in the right cirucmastances. While he did use his great great great grampa’s magic for this a bit with the hypnosis, it’s his manpulations that MAADE the hypnosis work: by giving the moai something they WANT, a vacatoin and a break from a thankfless job, it means they aren’t acitvely trying to break his control no matter what happens and he and Feldrake can focus on freeing the lizards. And on top of that.. Wayne Knight gets one HELL of a musical number, sing talking to the beat as he manipulates and hypnotizes the moai and encourages their partying. While the main plan is dumb the plan to get there is just glorious to watch and Sheldgoose’s finest hour thus far and again we get to hear wayne knight SING. Kinda. And I will not trade that for anything. 

So what are the Cabs up during this? hanging out, playing cards and doing friend stuff like Panchito doing a dive and them catching him. Jose claims nothing could split us up.. and cue Daisy. 

It.. it’d been so nice without her. And you may recall last time she showed up while I didn’t like her or her actions or how it was written.. she was at least KINDA tolerable. Still a total bitch but you know she MIGHT have had a point and we might learn more about her history with donald. 

Yeah this episode cements that this Daisy is awful and Donald is better off without her. She shows up because the girls talked Donald up, beause their angels.. and also because they apparently live with him now? Like.. don’t Daisy, who dosen’t think Donald’s responsible or their parents, whoever the hell they are, have.. issues with them suddenly living with three 30 something men and an xty hear old Goddess. I mean.. that sould raise a few thousand flags, but frankly at this point if your wondering why a child is living iwth a disney character instead of your parents their probably dead or on the moon. That’s not the problem here.  No the problem her is again, somehow twice in a row, Xandra. After great introductions to both the boys to daisy, Jose flirts and Panchito shakes her hand a bit too hard, same as it ever was, Donald TRIES to bring up being a cabllero.. and Xandra prevents him then explains outside after the girls smooth things over why: telling daisy would bring her into his world and all the dangers with it.....

I HATE this trope. I hate it so fucking much. See i’m a superhero guy. I’ve made no attempt to hide this. So you can imagine the number of times i’ve seen a hero hide their ID and use this fucking excuse “They’ll get hurt if they know” or “it’s too much of a risk” or “blah blah blah bullshit reason for not telling my partner the truth”.  Now i’m not saying the secret idtentity or having some sort of secret world saving thing are bad tropes. They are valid stories for a reason. Sometimes you CAN’T: Peter Parker didn’t tell Aunt May because she had a weak heart, Thor dind’t tell jane foster because his dad was a dick who’d go after her any time he tried and when he finally did.. still did shit to break them up. Because Odin is an asshole. Ms. Marvel didn’t tell her parents because she thought they’d stop her and when her dad found out, if sadly breifly, you can guess what happen. Miles Morales didn’t because he was terrified he’d be homeless as his dad HATED mutants, which he thought he was and wasn’t fond of viglantes, and to make matters worse his mother later DIED, she got better as of secret wars, in a spider-man fight, if not thanks to him obviously, so when Miles DID tell him Jefferson abandoned him for months. He’s gotten FAR better since then and really grown as a person, but my point stands: I’ts okay to hide your id at first to protect yourself as a hero: it’s okay to want to make sure a partner dosen’t out you to the press or something and is stable and loving enough before you tell htem. And it’s okay to not tell them something if htey probably wont’ belivie it or might not be prepared just yet. Now if they have some reason to hate the other you you should probably either tell them and see what happens or explain things, like Peter should’ve tried explaning what happened with Gwen’s dad to her, or break it off for their own good, which will devistate them, but is better than lying to them.  And that’s the problem: As Wonder WOman said in a shockingly obnoxious movie, “Nothing good comes from lies”.. and while groosly oversimplified.. is not wrong here. Nothing good comes from lying to your partner day in and day out. I’ts why more modern works have deconscruted it: Miles, again, had a girlfriend named Barbra, but the recent run broke them up.. however they did so cleverly by having Miles refuse to tell her his id despite her having figured it out and her leaving him for hiding stuff from her. That’s what would REALLY happen. A long term partner isn’t going to tolerate you LYING to them and ducking out constnatly to save the world. Eventually you either have to let them go or try and tell them. I’ve been in barely any relationships but I was ALWAYS honest because again, nothing good comes from lying to your partner. Nothing good comes from deciving them and basically gaslighting them for “their own good”. If their with you and your an adventuer, super hero or what have you.. their in danger. So either don’t date them and find someone your speed like another hero or some mythical being, or TELL THEM and let THEM decide if it’s too much. This kind of bullshit is manipulative, cruel and selfish and I thought we’d settled it. 

And while Donald was intending to tell Daisy to impress her, a bad reason i’ll admit... he was trying to be honest. But the EPISODE tries to portray it as a good thing and as him being noble. It isn’t. He’s listneing to a bad person, who has to EARN my good will back after this, whose only in it for herself. No really she only has the two go out because she’s tired of donald pining for daisy. 

I mean i’ts been a month, and the girls are around but she hasn’t come up once during the last few episodes. So this comes out of nowhere and makes Xandra into a selfish jackass who is willing to send her friend off to lie to his partner with NO cover story for his actions to make him look good just to shut him up. This is someone who need I remind you can travel the world in an instant and knows a lot of magical beings who’d understand donald’s line of work. Instead of setting him up with one of them and abandoning daisy she sets up a doomed relationship. Oh and she and the boys whine about being bored without donald. Fuck off.. not you josea nd panchito, while extra dumb this episode the boys just genuinely miss their best friend and it’s endearing. Xandra though.. she can fuck off. As mentioned Daisy is not much better, and spends the date grilling donald about what he does , as AGAIN, XANDRA GAVE HIM NO COVER STORY OR JOB OR ANYTHING. Now granted she’s hundreds of years old, so she probably wouldn’t have a good one anyway... but she’s the one who INSISTs ON IT BEING A SECRET. And as the girls have shown, again knowing that secret does not hurt. Their mission control, Daisy could be too. Worst she could want is to JOIN them and given the boys started with no experince and are now certified ass kickers... why can’t she be one too? It feels less like Xandra looking out for Daisy and more that Xandra just dosen’t wnat her in her club.. which fair but still.  The point is Daisy still treats donald as shifty and worthless, despite no evidence to this as whiel he has his faults doing nothing is not worth them and even says when he tries to spin it as “helping those in need”  “How can you help other people if you can’t help yourself?”

I mean it’d be something to ponder and a great thesis statment.. in another story. Or even in this one.. if it’d been set up that Donald had been irresponsible. Someone willing to abandon others, prone to anger and a bit of a goofus, all true. But it really says how little you think of him Daisy that you can’t even picture him helping people and assume it’s some excuse. That you clearly hate your ex so much, clearly think of him as so much less than you that youc an’t FATHOM he’s doing good stuff and only think he’s gottne better when he pampers you with fizzy water, though it nicely has scrogoe on the bottle so good little nod there, and lobster. Seriously she dosen’t turn around till the girls, dressing up as a waiter , offer that. I..can’t fathom why we’re supposed to root for this relationship between a flawed but hardworking person.. and his ex partner who STILL never apologized for the brithday thing despite his FUCKING HOUSE BURNING DOWN, i.e. e the THING HE WAS TRYING TO EXPLAIN, and then spends dinner doubting he’s doing anything with his life, distruting both him and his nieces. 

And.. it gets worse. Yes.. yes it somehow gets worse. No foolin. So the bell is sound and Xandra FORCIBLY ABDUCTS DONALD FROM THE DATE SHE TOLD HIM TO GO ON. And both come out really bad, if worse on Xandra’s end by a mile. Donald is refusing to go help save the world or whatever for a date with someone that DOES NOT appricate him and only accepts bribes. Tha’ts a dick move even if he dosen’t realize he’s in an abusive relationship to put getting laid over the world’s saftey.  That being said.. Xandra STILL comes off worse. Despite having the moral high ground.. Xandra dosen’t KNOW what the threat is, or if they really need him, drags him out, dosne’t let him explain to daisy, and then barely lets him go back when it seems it’s just a party. Then drags him back AGAIN when their backs are against the wall without feeding daisy an explination or really caring she broke things up just halfheartdly saying she’ll forgive him and Donald saying “You don’t know daisy”. None of them come off well. Again the boys only aren’t loathsomebecause their oblivoius and just want their best friend back. If the other episode hadn’t already damaged Xandra enough i’m DEEPLY worried she won’t be able to walk this one back. Daisy certainly fucking won’t. 

So yeah our heros deal with the moai and the lava lizards, as the boys fail to get the moai to go back to their job and the lizards unleash their wonderfuly weird queen who rides a bridge of them to the mainland.. fucking love that. When things get dire Xandra does aformentioned forcing donald to come back without actually helping him with daisy or just TELLING HER AND OH MY GOD LET’S JUST MOVE ON. Fuck this episode is aggravating me. 

We do get a nice bit where donald’s angry dance inspires the moai to imitate it.. and thus stomps out the laval lizards and gives our heroes an opening, and Donald DOES prove his worth by having the moai do the belly flop from earlier to stop the queen, causing the rest of the lizards to flee and our heroes to win. Yay.. I guess. Donald goes back to find Daisy gone. 

He dosen’t see it that way and the girls say while he’s still a mess, what he did was noble. that sucks, and they leave him a massive bill instead of paying for it with their tips because their the ones who brought in the fancy food to ply their aunt. Fuck. this. episode.  Final Thoughts for This one: I belivie I said FUCK THIS EPISODE. It had it’s moments, the musical number, the moai beach party, my boys.. but the sheer obnoxiousness, cliche plot that has been throughly shredded for good reason and isn’t in use anymore about secret lives, and Daisy, Xandra and to a very lesser Extent Donald all being deeply unlikable. This episode is just REALLY fucking bad. HOpefully the series gets back on it’s feet next time. Until the next rainbow.. I really need a frigging gatorade. I.. I don’t drink booze. This is one of those times I wish I did. Goodnight everybody. 

[tildehummingbird]

Spoiler about Catherine and the Soul Riding

(I posted this over at sso forums, so if you see a thread like this there, it's me hehe)

So, I've done the Catherine Quests and I've completed them and as a lot of other people, I was mad. 

I mean, I had so many questions: If Aideen is in everyone, and destiny doesn't matter, then what's the need for Soul Riders, if anyone can do it? Destiny and being the "chosen one" is the whole entire concept of this game, and changing the route NOW, or at ALL doesn't make any sense, and they're probably gonna lose a lot of players that are interested in lore because this doesn't make any sense. Then what's even the need for a 5th rider? What's even the need for this game at all, if a 5th rider isn't needed then just follow the storyline in Starshine Legacy and don't add the 5th rider. If anyone can do it and if Aideen is in everyone, then explain why we're the only ones in this whole entire generation that can handle all powers at once, why can't any of the other riders in Jorvik? Why was Elizabeth so surprised that we could in fact use all powers? What was the need for the beginning cutscene? It literally told us "In times of despair, a sisterhood of Soul Riders will ride forth to protect the island from the evil that seeks to rip the world apart. It is foretold that a sisterhood led by a heroic and fearless girl will appear on horseback to bring hope and light back to those who believe that all is lost... Are you that girl?" I don't know dude, it doesn't even matter if I am because apparently anyone can be that girl, so who cares if I am? Then why were we able to literally fly on our horse? Why would Fripp be so adamant about our protection to the point of where he put his own life on the line, just so we could be protected? The message of "anyone can be a hero" is great, however that's not the point of this story and it never has been.

All these questions and no answers, so I thought we could theorize a bit so that, together, we could try to understand a bit more about this and understand what even happened, what it means and where it is going.

I was checking the star stable tag on Tumblr, and I saw a post by @sso-emberwood that pointed out a lot about Catherine: She didn't even want to be Aideen at all, all she wanted was a normal life with Thomas and her baby, to be free from this prophecy and these duties. Not only that, but The Keepers of Aideen aren't exactly the most telling bunch, so she would know as much as we do: nothing. She wasn't a fan of the prophecy thing, she wasn't a fan of being the only one who's special and different, and she rejected the whole idea, so it would make sense as to why she'd project that onto us, too. Not only that, we saw that she lost her horse, and therefore "half a soul", as Linda described it so maybe she really doesn't get it anymore.

Either that, or maybe we perceived what she said wrong. I went back to check on what she said, so I'll write it here: "We needn't wait for Aideen's return. The goddess is reborn with every horse and rider who open their hearts and form a true bond. Aideen's gift is love. She's been with us all along. In me. In you. At least that is what I believe."

So, to start off, I think that last part is very important. That's what she belives - referring back to what we know is fact: she didn't like the prophecy, and she wanted to define her own destiny and not be controlled by it - so it would make sense for her and her character that she'd have these beliefs. To her, all you need is Aideen's love because Aideen's gift lives in everyone. Now, it is true that Aideen's Gift lives in everyone because Aideen's gift IS for everyone in the island of Jorvik, and I even have Rhiannon dialogue to prove that the Keepers of Aideen agree on this too. This bit of text is from one of the Soul Riding quests, where Rhiannon takes us to South Hoof:

"Have you ever noticed there's something different to the nature of Jorvik? The grass is greener, the birdsong sweeter. But most importantly, the horses are happy and free. They have all this land to roam, and we Jorvegians share this land with them. This connects us to horses on a deeper level. The other Druids put so much focus on the Soul Riders, Guardian Horses, Aideen herself....but they forget to see the magic that's right before their eyes. The magic of Aideen's gift." At this point, you're given two choices: either "I already know that." or "That's what they all say." Regardless, she'll say "Is that so? You've probably heard folk talk about it as if it's some kind of friendship between horse and human. But it's so much more than that. It's what pulled me to travel up North to care for magical horses. It's what makes Nix so special to me. It's even why I'm a Wild Whisperer...On Jorvik, our deep bond with horses is magical. You've been training exceptionally well. During this time, the bond you have developed with [horse name] has flurished. But you haven't just strengthened the bond between both of you. You've connected to the nature of Jorvik on a deeper level, and with that have honed a magical link to all the horses in this island. Close your eyes, and listen to the sound around us. Can you feel how everything is connected?", yet again you can choose between "Yes, it's magical." and "Uh...no." she'll say "You clearly have an affinity for this. I'm impressed. Sometimes, if you focus clearly, you may notice a spark of something powerful. That's the presence of a wild horse. It's one of the ways we Wild Wardens sense they're nearby and ensure their safety. So now you know. Aideen's Gift ties us to all the horses on Jorvik, and it is something to treasure. You can use this knowledge to improve your riding skills. Pay close attention to your horse, and the horses around you, and you will find harmony. This is what I wanted to share with you weeks ago, but I thought you weren't ready to understand. However, I was wrong. Your dedication to Soul Riding has proven just how much you care for the horses on this island. I'm proud of you, [player name]. Thank you for helping protect the horses on Jorvik."

Aideen's Gift is what makes you have such a good connection with horses and it is what makes Jorvik's people and horses special - however, that's certainly not enough to lead Soul Riders into battle. Love isn't enough to defeat Garnok - you need to be chosen for it and destiny DOES matter, no one else has any power in any circle, only the people who are born specifically to have it. However, Catherine is right, but I'm not exactly sure that she understands that that's not why we are unique and that's not what makes us fit for battle instead of literally anyone else - we're unique and the reason as to why we're the only ones who should be able to go into battle is because we don't just have Aideen's Gift like everyone else - we are Aideen. Catherine is Aideen too, we are her and she is us. Cause all of the reeincarnations of Aideen are the same thing, different body. Us and the Soul Riders don't just have Aideen's Gift, we were reincarnated to be her and the soul riders were reincarnated to be what they are today.  Catherine very visibly rejected and left behind her duties and gave up being a soul rider after she lost her horse - she completely rejected even looking for a reeincarnation of it like we did with Anne - but when she did, we were born, because Catherine gave up which meant that another reeincarnation was needed, because it needs to be Aideen herself, not just someone who has the gift - she kept the gift, but she no longer had what it takes to be that girl, and didn't want to either, so someone who did was born.

And again, the Druids make it very clear that their mission, and their end goal is he rebirth of Aideen. A couple of days ago I got a lore book from the Soul Riding missions called "Druids and Horses: A Partnership" that said this: "Aideen's Gift enables druids to continue to protect Jorvik, feel spiritually closer to the land, and ultimately fulfill their mythical goal of the rebirth of Aideen" and  "[...] a network of spiritual people whose sole mission is to protect Jorvik through ensuring the return of the goddess Aideen." 

Which means they acknowledge that they're waiting for a specific someone to be born, so that that specific someone can lead the sisterhood into battle, when the final battle comes, which means that they acknowledge that it can't just be anyone. Waiting for someone special is the whole point of the Keepers of Aideen - they are literally called Keepers of Aideen, no Aideen reborn, no Keepers of Aideen.

Also, in the mission "Strenght in Numbers" with Rhiannon in the Soul Riding, she said that what made her leave Jorvik was that she saw a hooded figure in the forest, and it felt like it was draining the life out of her and her horse, so she left because she was afraid, but she came back upon Elizabeth's request for help, and she when she saw how much closer the Keepers of Aideen were, she decided to stay, but after she says she says: "What really opened my eyes was you, [player name]. Your dedication, skill, and sheer talent has given me faith in Aideen's Light that I haven't felt for a while." Everyone has something like this to tell us, I think there's a reason for that. One of the most important ones so far was for example, when Darko was able to enter the Stone Ring, threatening to destroy the keystone, and Fripp says: "I would sooner destroy the keystone than let you take [player name]. She is more important than you imagine..."

The reason as to why I choose to share the Rhiannon one is because it is recent, just like Catherine's memories which means the story and the objective remains the same, with the only difference that we know Catherine's perspective and why she failed and why the sisterhood fell apart, which will be important in the future, because if you don't remember, the dark riders are trying to recruit Nihili (previously known as Elise) who is the 4th Dark Rider. So far, we've only seen her horse but what we do know about her is that she has the ability to cause discord within the Dark Riders, but I'd imagine she'd have influence on us, as well, and that's why she'd probably be recruited. The Dark Riders know that the previous sisterhood failed due to discord and fights within the group, so it wouldn't be surprising that they'd try to make that happen yet again.

Apart from all of this, I simply don't think Catherine knows enough about this whole thing to be the one to reveal it to us, and I also think the "big reveal" was anticlimatic and not well done, at least in my eyes, because *assuming* this is the route they're going with...eh? What? Why was it so...dry?

Also, if you go back to the very first news post on Catherine's diary, it says "This chapter of the Soul Rider story arc is a standalone quest and is not mandatory to complete in order to play future quests with the Soul Riders." and if they were to add SUCH an important reveal then it wouldn't be a something you could choose not to do, it would be a mandatory, integral part of the story -  this seems like very important information, right? If we don't do this quest, and just move on then in the world and in a story sense, MC wouldn't know that there's technically no Aideen to look for. It doesn't make sense if this is really what they're going to do...Unless it's not and this is just Catherine's opinions on the matter.

Overall, I'm just not a believer yet - I still think this is just Catherine's thoughts. As @sso-emberwood said, the only one who could actually tell us anything for sure is Fripp. He knows way more than everyone in the Keepers of Aideen. But he's sick still, and has been since 2017 the poor guy. I don't think we should assume anything yet, and I certainly don't think the game has changed directions. If it did, I'll be honest with yall - my interest would not be the same and I think it would be that way for a lot people as well and I think that's fair. You can't just come in and suddenly change the route of something that has been hinted at and is supposed to be the point of the game, it just doesn't make any sense. If so, then there's no need for this game or for a 5th rider.

[aenwoedbeannaa]

Forest Fires | Geralt x Reader | Part 7

Summary: You and your Witcher companion arrive in Ellander, where you encounter a familiar face. Unfortunately, being behind walls for the first time in years brings back some overwhelming memories.

Word Count: 3,068

Warnings: Might be triggering for those with PTSD or trauma. Panic attack, flashbacks. Nothing super graphic.

A/N: As usual—sorry for the delay in this chapter. I have so many WIPs, but I promise not to leave y’all hanging. Hope you enjoy!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6

If you enjoy my work and want to check out more of it, you can check out my masterlist, and if you’d like to be added to any of my taglists, comment or message me and I would be happy to add you 😊.

Forgotten Memories

For someone who has spent the past years not using magic, you are pleasantly surprised that the two of you emerge from the portal and into the very garden you’d seen in Geralt’s mind. More than a few girls, who you expect must be students, are standing frozen with their mouths agape.

You unwind your arms from around Geralt’s neck and take a couple steps away from him; you have only been here once before, and you are not entirely sure what sort of rules there are in a place like this. You never were one for religion. With magic, you hadn’t needed it. And after you ran away from your duties, you’d just assumed that even if there were gods or goddesses out there, they wouldn’t be looking down on you fondly.

The shocked silence of the temple garden is broken at last, by a familiar voice.

“Y/N?”

You turn your head to see someone you had not, if you were being honest, expected to see again during your lifetime.

“Yenna!”

The two of you rush to embrace one another; years of memories flooding your head and washing your mind full of pictures of Aretuza. Like so many others, Aretuza had been your first real home. Though at first, it seemed, the school was not much better than the cruel reality you faced outside of its walls. Tissia was a genius, but she could be cruel. Thankfully, it was not the same kind of cruelty you faced at the hands of your aunt and uncle who had taken you in after your parents died – that had been pointless and malicious. Tissia’s brand of cruelty was one meant to teach you something; to make you a better sorceress.

At one point, the school had been the only piece of the world that you had known, and seeing your old friend sends your mind in a whirl, back to the mind of a girl who knew nothing of the outside world until she was tossed out into it. Of course, you head ad been filled with images of going off to serve as a court mage, advising kings and queens. It had been an exciting prospect at the time – back when you still believed that rulers cared for their people; back when you believed that there was some good you could do advising one.

“You are quite possibly the last person I would have ever expected to see at the Temple of Melitele,” the raven-haired sorceress says matter-of-factly, but not rudely. That’s Yenna—blunt as always.

“I might say the same about you,” you say, corners of your lips twitching ever so slightly up.

“Everyone thought you were dead.” That statement hits you hard, as if you hadn’t wondered that. Still, you’d spent so long hidden out in the forest, always feeling as if you had to cover your tracks, keep your movements a secret – it was hard to think that people thought you were dead when you were constantly trying to hide from those who knew you were alive.

“Well, that had been the goal,” you admit. “After...” You trail off, not particularly wanting to recount your time in Nilfgaard. It had not been pleasant, but that went without saying. There was no need to relive it.

The raven-haired sorceress smiles wryly, “Believe me, I know.”

The two of you make eye contact for a brief moment that seems to stretch on far beyond the few seconds that it lasts. At Aretuza, you had seen one another as rivals – though no one could truly rival Yennefer. Now, there was a kinship between the two of you; two sorceresses who ran from their duties. You had not heard much of why Yennefer left, save the rumors that the queen and infant princess of Aedirn had perished because of her – but you did not believe those. Perhaps you had when you’d first heard them, but truth was, the aristocracy was cruel, not above killing one another for power.

Not above sending entire armies to sack an entire city and sending mages in to kidnap princesses.

Behind you, Geralt clears his throat, snapping you out of your reverie.

With your thoughts still somewhat muddled, you turn and extend your arm towards him. “Geralt of Rivia,” you introduce him yourself, “He’s a Witcher.”

Yennefer smirks, though there is a distance in her eyes that tells you she has not quite snapped from whatever thoughts and memories were flowing through her own mind.

“The famous White Wolf,” she says as she takes a couple of steps forward. “Mother Nenneke will be so pleased to know you’ve arrived at last.”

You raise an eyebrow, confused. He had not mentioned that he was expected here at the Temple. Though, the confusion written on his own face tells you that he had no idea, either.

“Iona the First,” Yennefer says matter-of-factly.

Geralt’s eyes light up as he acknowledges the name with a nod. You, on the other hand, have never heard the name, and only grow more confused.

“One of the priestesses here,” Geralt explains once he registers the befuddled look on your face. “She has certain... talents.”

“Even the temples have mages now?” you ask, still slightly bewildered. You’d never heard of such a thing. Though, you suppose you have been in hiding for quite a while, and before then, you’d had absolutely no interest in religion.

Yenna laughs, shaking her head and sending raven curls cascading about her shoulders. “Not a mage, no,” she says. “She has a gift. Goes into trances and teases out the future – or at least, possible futures. It’s really quite unsettling.”

“Sounds like it,” you mutter. This place is getting stranger by the moment, and being behind stone walls, no matter how expansive the open space within is, already has you feeling caged in like an animal at a market. Even worse, the Temple looks too much like a castle; like the castle you’d run from and like the castle you were ordered to take Cirilla from. That thought alone sets your heart racing.

Seeming to sense this, Geralt reaches out and places a hand under your elbow, steadying and reassuring. You are glad for it, given the fact that your hammering heart and racing thoughts were making your vision swim. Though, you suppose, it could also be residual effects of opening the portal after having used next to no magic in years. You remember the feeling quite well from your early days at Aretuza, when you’d leave a lesson so exhausted that you could hardly walk back to your room without falling over.

“Sorry,” you mumble, nearly tripping over your own feet when you try to shift your weight, but Geralt is there to support your weight, which seems to be growing heavier by the moment. “I’m just...” You trail off once more as you sway on your feet, prompting him to wrap his arm around you, allowing you to lean heavily against him.

“Opening the portal must have drained her,” Yenna says, her voice sounding quite far off, though you know she is only a few feet away from you. You are desperately trying to cling to consciousness. The last thing you want to do is show up here and look weak when this is supposed to be the beginning of some quest to find the girl. Right now, you are sure it seems that you are quite possibly the last sorceress on the entire Continent that anyone would want chasing after the Cintran princess.

Geralt, though his knowledge about magic is rather limited to the Witcher signs and some cursory knowledge that Visimir deemed necessary to his education, nods in agreement.

“She hasn’t used magic in years,” he explains while you struggle to keep your eyes open, “That portal was a first.”

“Well that’s one hell of a way to jump back into things,” Yennefer says. You can hear the smirk in her voice, and will yourself to smirk back. It certainly wasn’t the smartest way to go about it. Still, it wasn’t as if you had another choice. It could have taken weeks to travel here on foot or by horse, and it was clear that time was not something on your side – or at least it seemed that way. You just hope it is as safe here as Geralt claims it to be. A portal like that could easily serve as a thread for Nilfgaard to follow straight to you.

“Mother Nenekke has already arranged a room...” Yennefer trails off.

“One room is fine,” Geralt cuts in.

Yennefer nods, “Iola was able to track you, but she hadn’t seen anyone else in the trances.”

“Makes sense,” Geralt responds. You, however, have no idea how that makes sense exactly, but you are not in a place to ask questions. Thankfully, Geralt continues on, “She usually uses items connected to a person, and Nenneke wouldn’t have anything of hers.”

Yes, you suppose, that does make sense. That, and the fact that you have worked so hard these past years ensuring that you were about as untraceable and unfindable as possible. That could also have quite a lot to do with it. You just hope that this Mother Nenneke will not scoff at your presence. After all, if she is involved in this plot – or whatever it is – to retrieve the ashen-haired Child Surprise, she may think of you as the worst sort of scum.

Fear of that particular issue sets your heartrate speeding once more, which does nothing to help your current state. You feel as if your lungs are constricting, making it difficult to breathe. You slump against Geralt, unconsciously clawing at him as you attempt to regain your breath. He responds by scooping you up into his arms and nodding towards the Temple.

“Would be best to get her to the rooms so she can lie down,” he states.

“I’ll brew some tea that’ll help,” Yennefer adds quickly. “I trust you know your way around?”

Geralt mumbles a quick mhmm in agreement.

“It is, I believe, your usual room,” Yennefer states. You are drifting in and out of consiousness, and wonder momentarily exactly how many times Geralt has been here. It is, quite truthfully, the last place you’d expect a Witcher. Between yourself, Geralt, and Yennefer, is seems that Mother Nenneke keeps strange company indeed. You wonder how she hasn’t faced any sort of reparations from Termeria’s leaders. Though, perhaps they just as much interest in finding the girl as you three do – or possibly more, speaking from a political perspective.

“I... I’m sorry,” you choke out as the Witcher carries you through unfamiliar hallways, moving with the easy confidence of a person who feels himself to be at home in a place. “It’s just... magic, and the walls... I haven’t--”

“Shh,” Geralt cuts you off before you can continue on with your breathy sentences. “It only makes sense. No need to wear yourself out even more trying to explain.”

You would like to argue, but he is right. You don’t have the energy to spare between the incredible exhaustion caused by casting the first spell you’ve cased in years when you opened that portal and the panic that seems to have a vice grip on your throat. Truly, being behind walls is not something you enjoy.

It doesn’t take long for the Witcher to manage to make his way from the gardens all the way up to a set of rooms on the third or fourth floor – you've lost count. There is a large room with a desk, sitting area, and a large canopied bed, and you can see a door which you assume must lead to an adjoining bathroom. Despite the stone walls, you find that the room is bright and airy, thanks to several large windows that are open, letting sun filter in through billowing curtains.

Geralt carries you straight to the bed, setting you down gently on the cool sheets. Thanks to the open windows, the air smells of wood smoke at autumn, calming you as you force yourself to breathe in and out slowly, reminding yourself that you are not in Nilfgaard, and these are not the stone walls that surrounded you there. You are safe; at least that is what Geralt promised – and you are inclined to believe him. Still, you feel so incredibly useless lying here like this.

“I’m so sorry,” you apologize once again, “I just… It’s the magic, and the walls. I don’t like walls.”

Geralt sits next to you on the bed, stroking your hair in the way that he’s quickly learned calms your nerves. Yet, right now, you feel quite awful about it. You hadn’t wanted Geralt to see you like this. You hadn’t wanted him to know about this part of you – the part of you that is sometimes so gripped with fear; irrational fear of people and places that were far away, separated from you by time and distance. The woods had been safe for so long – it’d been easy to hide it from him there. But now… Things are quite different.

“In Nilfgaard, there were nothing but walls,” the words spill from you lips. “Nothing but walls, and…” you trail off, squeezing your eyes shut, wishing very much that you hadn’t spoken at all. The images flashing through your mind are all ones you’d kept locked away under lock and key, not allowing yourself to think about them, not wanting to relive these moments.

“Whatever happened in Nilfgaard,” Geralt speaks softly, still stroking your hair, “I promise you that I will never let it happen again.”

His voice sounds far off one more, thanks to the pounding of blood in your ears and spiraling thoughts, but you reach out and cling to his arm, attempting to anchor yourself, though you can’t manage to force out the words.

You are not reading his thoughts, nor would you have the strength to if you even tried. But, if you had been, you would have heard several rather graphic thoughts about how he’d like to hack whoever had done this to you – whoever had made you so afraid when you were perfectly safe here with him – to unrecognizable pieces. You’d also see, quite clearly, that he’d use his silver sword while doing so. After all, silver is for monsters.

Tears start to slip from your eyes thanks to a mixture of frustration and fear, making your turn your head to half burry your face in the soft pillow. It was bad enough letting him see you upset, it was even worse letting him see you cry, especially considering the years separating you from the things that you were crying about.

“It was a long time ago,” you mutter, “I… I shouldn’t be upset about it after all this time.” Your attempts at rationalizing yourself only serve to make you more frustrated. You are ashamed. Ashamed for things you had no control over, ashamed for things you should have been able to prevent, ashamed for everything. And yet, Geralt was still here, stroking your hair gently, yellow golden eyes fixed on you, face contorted in concern. He hadn’t known – couldn’t have known – that being behind walls would trigger this; all the fear and all of the buried memories forcing their way to the surface.

“Monsters do monstrous things,” Geralt is still speaking softly, his warm baritone drawing your out of your own head. “It’s not easy to forget things like that,” he continues, letting his hand slip down to your back, rubbing gentle circles across your skin. He says it with such conviction that you believe him, and it slows the thoughts spinning through your head.

“They… they were monsters,” you mutter. “The things they did.” You shudder involuntarily at the memory. To this day, you cannot forgive Aretuza for sending you there. You remember how your heart had fallen to your stomach when you’d learned where you’d be sent. It was no secret the way that they treated their mages in Nilfgaard. You were there to carry out orders and to be a glorified plaything. It wasn’t what you’d dreamed of all those years, no doubt about it.

Geralt is silent for a moment, giving you a moment to continue. “It was easy to forget about out there away from everything… I didn’t think that it would be this bad. I’m sorry, Geralt.”

“Stop apologizing,” Geralt says, sounding stern for the first time, “Please, Y/N. It isn’t your fault.”

You don’t know why, but you find yourself sobbing at his words, a mixture of relief and anger. You’d spent so long pushing away the memories; so long telling yourself that it was all your fault.

“Listen, Huntress,” Geralt speaks again, “I won’t let anyone hurt you. I won’t.”

You continue to sob into the pillow as his palm rubs slow circles on your back. You don’t know what you did to deserve someone kind as the Witcher – someone that people described as a monster, but that had so little in common with the monsters you’ve encountered.

Silence stretches between the two of you as you slowly start to calm down.

“Thank you, Geralt,” you finally speak. “Just promise me, when we get to Ciri, you let me kill every one of those fuckers.”

Geralt smirks, leaning over to press a kiss to your hair. “I certainly won’t stop you, Huntress.”

For the first time since panic had overtaken you out in the garden, you smile.

A moment later, you hear the door open and the click of heels against the stone floors. You shift in bed so that you can look up to see Yennefer entering the room carrying a small saucer of steaming liquid, no doubt full of one of the calming elixirs you’d been taught to make at Aretuza.

You are about to open your mouth to apologize to her as well, but she speaks before you get the chance. “Drink this, sleep, and when you wake up, we’ll figure out a plan to get those pieces of shit.”

A knowing glance passes between the two of you, two sets of eyes flashing dangerously. “Sounds lovely,” you smirk. Perhaps revenge is petty, but you have to admit – it feels good to think about it. And, after all, a few casualties might be necessary to find Ciri.

***

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[ravenya003]

Some chill, spiritual, life-affirming stories to read/watch while in self-isolation:

Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)

A witch in training goes to a seaside village and opens up a delivery service - that's it, that's the plot. It's so gentle, and the story just invites you to tag along with this cute little girl as she flies her broomstick around the place and gradually grows in confidence.

The Secret Garden (1993)

It's starts as a Gothic mystery and ends as a fairy tale - that’s the dream combination, guys. All set in an English manor house and extensive grounds, with beautiful cinematography and great child actors. Also, Maggie Smith.

Song of the Sea (2014)

This is the one I've been nagging you all to watch every time I post a gif-set from it. Not to overhype it or anything, but it's the perfect movie. Every character arc, every plot beat, every theme and motif plays out at exactly the right pace and in precisely the right way. Plus the animation is STUNNING.

Kubo and the Two Strings (2016)

Produced by Laika so you know it's good, this is a feast for the eyes and based on Japanese mythology and culture. A young boy wielding a magical shamisen, whose eye was mysterious stolen in his infancy, is now accompanied by a talking snow monkey on a quest to save his mother. Beautiful soundtrack, gorgeous visuals.

Moana (2016)

The best of the recent Disney films, it's big and beautiful but also has enough quiet moments to do the main character's spiritual arc justice. You've probably already seen it, but consider the chance to see: "I have crossed the horizon to find yooooooou..." again.

Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005 - 2008)

I know you've already seen this, but now's the time for an uninterrupted rewatch. The animation, the mythos, the spirit world, the character growth, the world's greatest redemption arc... There's also a ton of graphic novels that continue post-show.

She Ra (2018 - )

A bunch of princesses in pastel outfits use their considerable sparkly power to defeat bad guys on a beautifully rendered moon. It's amazing, and the whole thing has a strange, dreamy, future-tech quality that's oddly calming.

The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of her Own Making by Catherynne Valente

Valente's imagination is a force of nature, and I promise you've never read anything like this before. It will TRANSPORT you to a place that combines the familiar fairytale tropes with wyverns and talking lanterns and green winds and herds of bicycles and girls made of soap. It’s Alice in Wonderland and Peter Pan and Narnia and post-modernism and myth-punk rolled into one. And the best part is, there are four more books and a prequel short-story to keep you fed.

The Darkangel by Meredith Anne Pierce

If you know me you know I HATE "dark male gets redeemed by good, pure, kind female" stories... with ONE exception, and that's this book. It’s because the redemption is hard-won and the heroine’s life doesn’t revolve around his recuperation (there are other mitigating factors as well) but more to the point, this is a Beauty and the Beast tale that makes their story part of a much bigger good versus evil plot.

Winter Rose by Patricia McKillip

You could choose any book by this author and disappear into her poetic-prose, but this one is best suited for this particular list. It's basically a retelling of the Tam Lin story, in which two sisters fall in love with a stranger who returns to reclaim his ancestral home, only for strange occurrences to follow in his wake. It’s strange and dreamy, told with dense prose and filled with symbolism, and carries an underlying message of self-awareness and recovery.

The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman

Our narrator returns to his home for a funeral and recalls scenes from his childhood, in which the three strange women living at Hempstock assisted him in the fight against a malevolent enemy. He captures what it was like to be a child – the wonder as well as the powerlessness, and how you deal with problems both mundane and supernatural, with plenty of his usual borrowing from fairytale traditions. (Classic Gaiman, basically).

[peace-coast-island]

Diary of a Junebug

A magically spooky adventure in the woods

Pippa and Mariposa are back at the camp for a magical adventure! Angie and Willow are with us as well, making it the first of hopefully many fun camping trips for Team Magic. Hopefully next time Luna and Skully - and maybe even Cassie, in an unexpected turn of events.

After having a great time during her first gyroid adventure, Pippa wanted to design her own gyroid themed furniture so she and Daisy Jane have been working on that for the past few months. Then Mariposa got involved with planning the event and it went from a fun scavenger hunt in the campsite to an all out adventure in the Moonlit Woods! So along with collecting gyroids we're also collecting trinkets and herbs for Luna and Skully since the woods are full of them during this time of year.

It's also a good excuse to explore this area since we rarely go out this far. Tom Nook warned us that the Moonlit Woods can be tricky to navigate, which is why I've been kinda avoiding that spot. There's still a lot of places outside the camp we have yet to explore and now that I've gotten familiar with the camping grounds after three years of living here, it's time to venture into the unknown.

I'm glad that Pippa's enjoying the camp. Since she and Almie first made the trip here Almie had been saying that being out here has lifted up her spirits a lot. Visiting the camp, training with Luna, and becoming friends with Mariposa, Angie, and Willow has helped her come out of her shell a lot. Things have been looking bright for her - she's doing well in school, her latest blood work is promising, and she's learning more and more about her magic every day.

Mariposa's the one who brought Team Magic together. Pippa and Angie were sort of loners, Willow part of the popular crowd, and Mariposa's the new kid in town. In the short time she's been in Rosevine, Mariposa has shaken things up for Luna and the gang in ways they never expected. She and Pippa haven't known each other for long but it seems like they've been friends forever!

A lot has happened since I last saw them at Emmaline and Minnie's wedding. Luna and Cassie have reached a truce so now they're trying to reconcile. The gyroid event happened to be perfect timing as Mariposa and the others felt it was best to give the sisters some space and privacy. No one really knows how they feel about Cassie but they're willing to hear her out, especially since she willingly threw away everything she worked hard to help Luna, Skully, and Mariposa. Cassie always struck me as someone who wants to bring out the best in others but at the same time won't hesitate to walk all over them to get ahead.

Angie's been coming out of her shell too. Now she's been doing some training with Luna and her magic has tremendously improved. She and Pippa were the kind of friends who mainly stuck together because they didn't fit in anywhere else. It's not that they didn't get along but they were just kinda shoved to the side and ignored by everyone else. Then Mariposa came along and they became notorious for getting caught up in magical shenanigans. It's good to see her perform spells with confidence!

Willow was an unexpected surprise. She comes from a powerful family so she and her siblings carry the weight of their family name. Before Mariposa came along Willow wasn't exactly friendly towards Pippa and Angie. She didn't antagonize them like some of her friends did but more like gave them the cold shoulder and walked all over them for her own personal gain. Turns out that she and Mariposa started off on the wrong note because Willow felt threatened by her. But after a few more missteps Willow grew to like her, and in turn she made amends with Angie and Pippa.

If the timing of the gyroid event wasn't already good, the fact that Willow's parents are out of town is even better. If her parents were home, they probably wouldn't let her come out here. Good thing Emmy and Eddie aren't strict, plus they like Mariposa so they're more than happy to let their baby sister go out on a week long camping trip, even if she has to hobble around in crutches.

Although she can't go climbing and running around, Willow didn't miss out too much on the fun. Not too long after the wedding shenanigans happened and Willow managed to save the day but took a nasty fall in the process. Basically, she landed in a way that not only badly broke her leg but also messed up her back a bit as well. So for a couple weeks she had to use a wheelchair until her legs felt normal again and since last week she's only needed crutches to get around.

We arrived at the woods around 9 so we can make the most out of the day. The thing with these gyroids is that they're easy to miss, especially in a place like the Moonlit Woods. Rare gyroids are always in places that are either difficult to navigate or hard to get to, which is why they're rare. I've rarely come across gyroids that can glow and I've never seen gyroids that can turn transparent like a ghost. It seems fitting for something like that to only be found in a place like the Moonlit Woods.

What I've learned about the woods is that you can't let it outsmart you. Another reason why the stars have aligned for this event is because of Team Magic. Whatever challenges the woods throws at us, the girls always find a way.

Angie's the expert at herbal magic, no cluster of overgrown weeds and thorns is too difficult for her to untangle. Like I said, she's really improved with her magic, especially since discovering not too long ago that she has an innate connection with plants. I can also see that Mariposa has been taking Luna's training to heart, connecting with nature and conjuring spells with the elements. Pippa's magic is different from Willow and Angie's because she's not a witch like they are, but like Mariposa she's found ways to apply Luna's guidance with what works for her. The three of them make a great team!

While searching for treasures, we came across a bunch of signs scattered throughout the woods. We got curious so Mariposa and Pippa decided to try and translate the symbols. The codes turned out to be clues left behind by someone who embarked on a quest to find the ultra rare cocostar tree. Of course, we had to go out and find the tree too because none of us can resist a quest!

According to an old journal left in a log by the explorer, the cocostar tree is a valuable resource. The bark can be used for tea and potions, the tea is believed to relax those in  distress and extreme emotional turmoil as well as stomach troubles in general. The fruit of the tree is edible, the taste described as sweet with a browned caramel flavor, good to pair with sweet and savory foods. The leaves are also edible and is said to have a distinct, bittersweet flavor that's good for cooking and making tea.

What puts many off from exploring the woods is how unpredictable it is to navigate. Retracing your steps would drive you crazy because the paths always change. A lot of things about the woods don't make much sense so we just have to accept that. In this case, it makes the adventure a lot more fun!

So while collecting gyroids, we stocked up on berries. Mariposa carved light glyphs in the dirt so we can see where we're going. Angie was able to communicate with the plants and use them as a guide. Willow used her crutches to test out some areas that looked like they might be full of pitfall seeds, saving us a lot of trouble in the process. Pippa researched the codes and puzzles scattered throughout the woods.

By putting our heads together, we managed to find the elusive cocostar tree! Mariposa was the first to spot the tree, a happy accident as she misfired a light orb while we were fighting off vines that ambushed us in the dark. The explorer was right, the tree is massive! The fruit is unlike anything I've ever seen before - it looks more like a fancy dessert than something that grew from a tree. Because the tree's so big, there's more than enough fruit for us to experiment with and for the girls to take back to Rosevine. It took a lot of work, but we did it!

Getting out of the Moonlit Woods was an adventure itself. Since we didn't expect to go on a cocostar tree quest, I wasn't sure how we were gonna lug all this stuff out. Of course, Team Magic found a way to carry the extra stuff that can't fit into backpacks. We'll be back in a couple days to retrieve more gyroids and maybe go on another quest if we stumble across something.

As soon as we got back to the camp, we got to work crafting gyroid stuff and trying out the cocostars. Pippa and Daisy Jane really outdid themselves with the gyroid designs and now the others want to help plan future events. Looks like the camp's all set for gyroid events in the next few months. I can't wait to see what kind of designs the others will come up with!

After spending all day in the woods, it's nice to hang out at the campsite and relax. Since Angie and Willow didn't really get to explore the hangout spots today, that's what we're gonna do tomorrow.

[artyrogue]

Blind Date Gaming: Konami GB Collection Vol. 3

Boy, I am WIPED after my date last night. It all started out as it usually does -- a quick visit to PRANG for an introduction to my next potential video game suitor. Who could have guessed that I would served up 4 dates! They all came together at once under the guise of Konami GB Collection Vol. 3.

I was greeted at first by an anime schoolgirl with a huge hand and quite possibly a contender for the weirdest hairstyles I've seen in a while. What is that, a grass-inspired mohawk laid over top a normal haircut?

Is this what the cows that make cowlicks eat?

What happened next was an eventful set of speed dates. This onslaught left me with no down time, thus the exhaustion. However, I did end up meeting some nice games. I'll speed through them each quick-like to keep this from being overly long. Luckily each of the games are pretty short (as expected from Game Boy games)!

First up is Gradius II! Now, I've never actually played a Gradius game, so I can't say if this is a port, some reconfigured version of Gradius II, or what. What I CAN say is that it has tight controls, beautiful graphics, interesting bosses, and some fun gameplay.

Looks like a rocky magic 8 ball

You start off hangin' out with what I assume are your dad and mom starships. Aww, family time! Soon, however, someone decks your old man and blasts your momma fulla lasers. Obviously disturbed, you fly forward and get chased by the perpetrator through a buncha rocks until you escape.

Good thing this guy doesn't feel like firing at me for whatever reason

...Except you kind of don't? You end up going through a bunch of planetary landscapes, shootin' dudes and grabbin' powerups that let you fire lasers and stuff. Pew pew! You eventually get captured, break out, and summarily fly through a ship, an asteroid belt, and I think some alien's guts? I'm not sure; I never went to med school for interplanetary digestive systems. Bosses fight you at every turn, and they are so sweet. Like, I don't always know what I'm attacking, but it just looks so cool that I really don't care!

Ever want to fight a kneeling, fanged alien stuck in a wall with detachable mouthy-brains? Yeah, well now you do, obviously!

In the end you find the enemy ship that assassinated your nuclear family with nuclear weapons, commit your own brand of galactic revenge, and I assume go on with your day in a half-arsed way, never addressing the journey you just went through for fear of sparking up some majorly weird PTSD.

Next up is some Castlevania game! It claims to be Castlevania II, but don't think it's Simon's Quest since it doesn't have slow-scrolling text boxes telling me that night is a poor time to explore the world when suffering from a magical adversary's angry sentiments. Instead, you just go about whippin' junk. Alright, I can be a lion tamer for the undead.

Why do cultists always gotta wear hoods? Can't they wear like a polo and some comfy slacks?

So in this installment, you can apparently shoot fireballs from a fully-upgraded whip, so it's instantly MUCH easier than most Castelvania games. The list of enemies is kind of lacking, but it was enough to feel competent. The level design was pretty spot-on, which is par for the course, though for some reason this game has a love affair with ropes? They're EVERYWHERE, but there's enough variation in the levels to give them pass. For example, some areas have auto-directional-pulling ropes, some ropes are spider webs made by enemies, some require quick sliding to avoid obstacles, etc.

You gotta wonder, does the guy living here have to go through all these traps every day just to get his mail? And how does he carry groceries back to his (probably rope-decorated) kitchen?

The boss fights were definitely memorable. Some of their designs were flat-out brilliant, and they were all pretty fun! Your sub-weapons weren't really that useful here, but that's fine. The bosses, too, were made a little easier with the projectile whip, but the designers struck a good balance between fun and hard.

These guys shoot out vertebrae in an arc, transferring them from one head to the other. I don't have a quip here, it was just a stupidly awesome designed boss that I wanted to gush about for a bit!

Well, perhaps I spoke too soon. The bosses were all fun except for the last 3 in the game. Allow me to whine and complain about them for a bit, if you will! The first was a tunneling snake on a forced scrolling screen that made you take damage unless you memorized where he was going to surface next (I HATE memorization-by-death gameplay). The next was a fellow Belmont who would relentlessly whip the crap outta you, throw swords all over the screen, and would probably be nigh impossible if I didn't have Holy Water. The final was Dracula, who I suppose gets a pass for being hard since he was the final boss...but he, too, was pretty much a memorization-by-death fight, too. The dude has 6 orbs revolving around him that spread out, essentially making 85% of the screen unsafe. Unless you know the specific spot to crouch down for the given position he's in, you get hurt, and you get hurt pretty badly. Oh, and you can really only hit him once per attack, so you'd better learn the safe spots for all 8 of his attack spots and hope you can hurt him and get into your safe position before taking damage.

ouch ouch ouch OUCH

In the end, it was overall a pretty fun time. Konami definitely knows how to make a good sidescrolling action game, which is probably why they're half of the name of the 'Metroidvania' genre. Go team Belmont!

Next up: Yie Ar Kung~Fu! What is this? I've never heard of it. It's a simple fighting game where you face off against 5 fighters, each with their own weapons and special moves. You play as a normal weaponless guy who can only kick and punch, because that's fair? Regardless, you must persevere through 4 rounds of these 5 fights, each time with your foes getting slightly harder.

Mmyep, this is fair.

My trademark fighting game strategy of sweeping seems to work for the most part, though as the difficulty ramps up, the other fighters move with ridiculous speed between attacks. Eventually, the game just becomes 100% about approaching a foe with more range than you, which obviously is the main focus of fighting games. What's that? Combos? Pffft, those are lame, just have the enemies fly across the ring like a sugar-high Jack Russel Terrier.

So this guy's power is to propel himself like a missile and look like an absolute goon while doing so

There's also a mini-game where you hit things thrown at you, but like they show up so quickly and your animation speed is so slow that it's impossible to do very well. It was an okay game overall, though, but I can sort of see why it isn't as well-known as Gradius or Castlevania.

Last game: Antarctic Adventure! It's a penguin-based racing game! I think? Does this count as a racing game? Well, you race against the clock, so sure. You gotta move at top speed through an icy wasteland, avoiding sea lions and holes in the ice.

I like how this sea lion looks after getting plastered in the face by a penguin moving at ~120 km/hr. Is he in shock? Is he alive? Should I notify his next of kin?

The lore is actually pretty deep in this game. The world has fallen into ruin due to global warming, and the glacier sheets on Antarctica are slowly melting away. As a penguin trained in espionage and terrorism, you must travel to the different embassies that many countries have propped up in an attempt to stake a claim in possibly the only livable area in the near future.

The french are planning to build replicas of their famous landmarks here, like the Ice-full Tower and Arctic de Triomphe.

You're not exactly racing as much as you are keeping ahead of the authorities pursuing you for planting bombs in the embassies. If you successfully plant your payloads in all of the embassies across all of Antarctica, you destroy their chances of bringing cultural imperialism to the local wildlife. Your customs are at stake! You must cast your empathy aside for the greater good of penguin-kind!

Also, you can sometimes turn into a helicopter? Not sure what that was about.

Okay, okay, yeah, I may have embellished a bit there. No, it's not as cool as that. You just run from one place to the next and heck if I'll ever find out why miscellaneous countries happen to have little castles in a barren arctic wasteland. People's taxes at work, I guess!

Oh right, there's also a fifth option on the main menu. It's Ms. O.C. Anime Girl explaining things about the games to you. I can't read anything she's saying, though, so I can only imagine the shady koala statue in the back has some relevance to her dialogue.

So that ends an exhausting series of dates. Whew! Glad you toughed it out with me. As I've completed all of the games this time, I didn't think another date was warranted. However, Gradius and Castlevania were fun enough to say that sure, I guess, it's worth going on another date in the future. Maybe it'd be better to find the original games, though, instead of this particular port. I can only assume the extra screen real estate, better sound effects, and greater ROM size would only enhance their experiences. And speaking of experiences, grab a Sprite of Passage from the jar over there on your way out! It's mint-flavored and can double as a water purification tab if you're ever stuck somewhere in the wilderness!

Man, I would kill to watch a skeleton ballet

[brachyurans]

tw3 moods, part 4

BASE GAME GWENTE QUESTE COMPLETE. I AM KING.

you know how i was saying i wanted to use a Nilfgaard deck for the aesthetic well i played a bunch of practice rounds against merchants and put together a good Nilf deck and won the passiflora running Emhyr the Relentless and it was great

i think i might try a Monster deck for the BoW and HoS gwent quests but that’s pretty far in the future.

also, i managed to hit 100 hours on this game without doing a single main quest in skellige lmfao

i learned how to install w3 mods so i could put in Always Full Exp. i waited so long for skellige that nothing was giving me any exp anymore and seeing ‘received: 2xp’ after quests is kind of not fun. now i’m enjoying crossing contracts off again! overleveling is a fake gamer lie.

i figured out the incredibly hilarious fact that geralt’s honey-collecting method involves setting the entire beehive on fire and waiting for it to drop to the ground. geralt hasn’t been friends with bees since he was torturing them with jugs as a witcherling and he’s not about to start now. i haven’t yet figured out what i’m meant to do with all these honeycombs but i sure do got ’em!

the bit where geralt gets put in skellige prison made me chilly. they made him go barefoot :( on the other hand, geralt interacting with what passes for a justice system on this world is fantastic and heartbreaking, he is embittered and impatient and he wants everyone to hurry up and just tell him exactly how bad he’s going to get fucked over today

the way geralt’s face fucking DROPS when eredin shows up in the cave of dreams. [MUFFLED SCREAMING]

also, the way blueboy lists off the herbs everyone’s gotta take—hemlock, henbane, nightshade, etc.—and geralt is like whoa that’s gonna be a hell of a trip like FHSKFJSK of course mr. i-drink-poison-for-a-living knows exactly what kinda trip they’re gonna have. and he’s still just like fuck it this may as well happen to me today.

hjalmar’s quest was actually a tremendous amount of fun, i was kind of putting it off because i don’t enjoy boss battles, but it reminded me a lot of being a kid and how much i loved reading the bits with odysseus and polyphemus (and rereading. i swear i read the polyphemus sequence over twice as often as any of the rest of it). the odyssey was one of my favorite books as a child. yes i was that child. getting folan from the rock trolls was also a lot of fun and having him around for the rest of the investigation was nice. (amazing he could fire a bow with those burns on his hands tbh.) i’m always ten times more willing to wander into horrible dark caves when i have an npc around to be friends with.

i would smooch cerys an craite. geralt should not, that would be weird, but i would.

I PUT THE BABY IN THE FUCKING OVEN

i don’t even have fucking words for this quest i was like ok cerys i support you and then. oh my god. i SCREAMED. i almost missed the timed choice i was too busy freaking out. like. THIS?? THIS IS THE FUCKING CONTEXT FOR THAT???

obviously after all that i crowned her queen. who the fuck picks hjalmar over cerys when she’s obviously the superior candidate like crach says he has no preference but the only point he can give in hjalmar’s favor is “skellige wants a monarch who’ll lead them to battle with nilfgaard” like ok sure crach but i’m gonna back the monarch who won’t immediately fling the isles into emhyr’s maw. may the reign of the first queen of skellige be long and prosperous.

CIRI!!!! IS!!! GAY!!!!!!

i thought lesbian ciri was just a reasonably popular fanon but no you can look a naked woman straight in the eyes as ciri and say “actually, i prefer women,” i love & support my lesbian daughter

the entire last wish sequence killed me FUCKING DEAD

geralt when he says ‘agh, no, not another portal’ and yen tells him to stop whining 😭😭😭

me: ok geralt lets try for a repeat of the unicorn scene [selects dialogue]

geralt: you wanna fuck on the top of a mountain in a dead guy’s bed?

yen: no.

yennefer, darling and best-beloved as she is to me, actually super needs to stop reading geralt’s mind without permission it isn’t cute or funny. it is also, as far as i can see, an invention of the games. bad cdpr [whacks with newspaper]

i’ve now let both the succubi go so i can never make a succubus decoction. rip me. the uncraftable recipe in my alchemy tab is gonna bug me but i just won’t stab women for the crime of being Horny if i don’t have to is that so wrong

i absolutely could not bear to kill any more fucking sirens so around this point i went to get uma. i still have sidequests and Witcher diagrams to get in skellige but sirens and mountains are annoying.

emhyr: i give you leads as fresh as morning dew and this is what i get?

me: well after running around the continent on fifty different side quests the leads were all uh... slightly less fresh.

“forktails this close to the fortress? someone’s been slacking off” go on just drag eskel for filth why don't you geralt

time for everyone to go on their Life-Changing Field Trip with Zuko Geralt

omfg the illusion child with the foglets that Lambert said was copied from his cohort is fucking TINY. it’s probably a reused model because the trainee witchers must have been close to full-grown when they did the trial of the medallion if they were going out on the Path right after but still like... thas bad. witchers are tragedies.

that geralt and eskel’s idea of quality time is dissecting a katakan together (or rather, eskel dissects a katakan and geralt eats an apple...i desperately hope he got the apple out of his pack because it kind of looked like he grabbed it off the nasty-ass katakan table and that’s Gross, geralt)... these guys are fuckin nerds

eskel managing to radiate mom friend energy while practically black-out drunk is extremely powerful

if I was yennefer witnessing three men twice as big as me squeezed into my nice dresses i would have had MUCH harsher words for all of them. those dresses would be unwearable afterwards. also i made the mistake of taking everything off in order to wear yen’s pants which meant geralt woke up on the floor completely naked while everyone else was already busy having their shit together while fully dressed. embarrassing.

vesemir is an extremely fucked-up old dude. ah yes, you know how old people are, nostalgic for their torture tables, just can’t get rid of those. lambert is right about everything

emhyr may be a grade-A douché but geralt’s a little bitch. what’s wrong with morvran leading a banner to kaer morhen, i thought we liked morvran. he’s a horse girl and he’s always polite to us. you don’t even know how to command a company of nilfgaardian soldiers geralt. oh no emhyr will have intelligence about kaer morhen if morvran comes!—he would get the same if it was just the soldiers you think his companies aren’t full of spies??? suck it up and play nice for ciri we need bodies in that castle!! suspect geralt went to ask emhyr literally just to lord over him that he was going to do some fancy magic stuff with ciri that emhyr could never, smh

i have to stop main-questing now and Prepare i want at least three more levels and all of my Witcher gear in order before i head out after ciri

which means i gotta go kill some more sirens.

fuck.

[chibi-jing]

Is Somnus truly such an asshole?

Hear me right, everything Somnus did in Episode Ardyn was absolutely despicable. But I can’t stop thinking that it was maybe way too despicable to be true…

 FFXV has a very realistic tone and his characters are all complex. Nobody’s perfect, the “good” guys are making mistakes and the “evil” ones all have strong inner motivations for what they did and aren’t completely manichaean (except maybe for Caligo who is definitely an asshole, period XD). To summarize, they’re all desperatly humans.

 But in Episode Ardyn – Prologue, Somnus is shown only as pure evil. He kills hundreds of innocent people and desires the throne so badly that he betrays and murders his own brother without batting an eyelid. Moreover, if Ardyn truly was the one chosen by the gods, then Somnus is defying them and lying to his people with an uninhibited ease solely on the basis of his personal gain…

This gives us two options. First, Somnus IS pure evil. All the Lucis Caelum are the heirs of the founder king’s sins and they contributed to plunge the world into darkness until the last of them, Noctis, finally washes away his family’s sins and frees Eos from corruption. Or second, Somnus is hiding something and only PRETENDS to be evil.

---

In the first case, if the founder king was a bad person it changes the position of the entire Lucis Caelum royal bloodline, making it illegitimate because it has been built on a lie. And that’s entirely possible: as many people reminded me these last days, Regis wasn’t such a good monarch. He’s shown as a good father and a noble man, and you feel sorry for him when he dies in Kingsglaive. But despite this good image, Regis was also the one who shut down Insomnia’s frontiers during the war, letting countless people defenceless against the Niflheim outside his magic wall, and he also let Insomnia fall on purpose only to give a chance to Noctis. So even if he acted with the best intentions, Regis has blood on his hands.

Regarding Somnus, it’s even worse. His decison to rule and to get rid of Ardyn condamned Eos to centuries of darkness: when Somnus kills his brother in the anime a big cloud of darkness is released in the atmosphere, annihilating Ardyn’s months or even years of work. By doing so, Somnus is contaminating even more their world in addition to all the people he already burned and to all the humans who can no longer be saved by his brother. As Ardyn explained to Noctis by talking about himself: “His body would come to host myriad daemons, that countless lives be spared. But a jealous king […] ostracized and demonized this healer of the people.” or even clearer in French: « Meanwhile the king […] decided to eliminate this man who was however the only one who could save his people. », by murdering him Somnus willingly deprived his people of their only known remedy against the Starscourge.

Do you remember how FFXV begins? No, not the Regalia’s malfunction, not the first cinematic either, no, before. Before we even play. The title screen.

The first time FFXV is launched, the title screen appears on a night sky accompanied by “Somnus – Instrumental”. And when the game is finished, the title screen features Noctis next to Luna on an aurora sky accompanied by “NOCTIS”. It’s very clear that FFXV’s story is to go from the dark to the light. You can also remark that in the letters of the logo the discrete white coming from their bottom begins to expel the black, emphasizing the players’ course and Noctis’ quest.

“Somnus” was composed for Versus XIII which was supposed to be a very dark game with heavy thematics such death, also explaining why the Lucis’ iconic color is black. I’m not sure Square Enix knew about Somnus’ character from the time Versus XIII became FFXV, but when they had to create him they surely wanted to remain coherent with what was done in FFXV. So I believe that if they chose to give to Ardyn’s brother the name “Somnus”, it’s because it was relevant. They knew about the song, about its meaning, about its origin. So they gave Somnus this gloomy backstory which accords with the game’s main theme: the world is dark, dying, corrupted and only the King of Light can put an end to all of this and cleanse the world sins, in conformity with what Takefumi Terada said about Somnus: “he became someone opposite character to Noctis”. Instead of providing Light, Somnus is spreading darkness.

 ---

With the second hypothesis, Somnus is undergoing the same tragedy as Ardyn and Noctis: life is playing with his fate and dictates him what he has to do even if he doesn’t want to.

As I said before, the antagonists of FFXV all possess something relatable. For example, before being a mad scientist, Verstael was a loyal soldier who desired to help his homeland the best he could. And we know Somnus isn’t born evil either: in the Q&A video, Toru Osanai revealed that the two brothers were in good terms when they were younger, Ardyn protecting his little brother and Somnus admiring his elder. Besides, he also adds that “Somnus does not really hate or despise Ardyn” and that his ambition is to save the world. So despite being a “realist and severe king”, Somnus isn’t portrayed as a bad guy at all.

Some particular shots from the anime support this theory. For example, Somnus takes no glory for burning hundreds of civilians or after murdering his brother. He doesn’t seem to enjoy what he’s doing but to solely execute some orders. If he truly despised Ardyn or wanted the throne so badly, he would have exulted after killing him, exactly like on the frame where he smiles before attacking Ardyn. But nope, he stands calmly in the empty room, watching the light on the horizon with no satisfaction at all. In the same vein when Ardyn turns into a daemon, Somnus is appalled by his brother’s metamorphosis. It’s like he knew Ardyn would became a monster, but isn’t actually proud at all to unveil it.

So why does Somnus appears so sadistic when he attacks Ardyn or despicable when he says Aera was a foolish girl after murdering her? Probably because he’s acting all along.

Somnus’ attitude in front of the crowd reminds a lot Ardyn’s attitude in FFXV where we all know Ardyn is playing a role. Somnus doesn’t only reveal that the gods chose him to the people, he’s also overacting: broad movements, loud voice, elegant argument, everything is meant to be convincing. The smile on his face when he attacks his elder is part of this role too, because why would Somnus be happy to confront his brother if he doesn’t despise him as Toru Osanai said? Because he wants the throne so badly he’s happy to get rid of his elder? If it was the case, Somnus would have had a triumphant attitude after defeating Ardyn but we saw that he hadn’t. Maybe he wants to measure himself to his brother’s skills? I don’t think either, because if Somnus wanted a fair fight against Ardyn he wouldn’t have smiled when his elder had to interrupt himself due to his illness. No, in reality, Somnus is posing as the bad guy on purpose. Each time he’s in public or talking to Gilgamesh, he behaves like Ardyn is the source of all the problems. And when he’s in front of Ardyn, he deliberatly shows his worst face by undermining him and his lover, to the point where Ardyn finally loses control. But once Ardyn dead, Somnus remains all alone in silence like an empty shell. He has no reason to pretend anymore. He did his job and that’s all.

We understand through the interview with the guys from SE that there are a lot of things that are still secrets but will be revealed in the future DLC. It’s obvious something happened between the two brothers before the beginning of the anime, something that can answer why Somnus is hunting Ardyn, or why is he in power while Ardyn is some kind of poor outlaw despite them coming from the same noble family? Why Gilgamesh is helping him? What are the links between the Lucis Caelums and Bahamut? Why Somnus had to act as he was pure evil and expose the worst of his brother? And even if for now we can’t know what happened we can guess that it probably changed Somnus radically, leading him to behave the way he does in the anime, a way that maybe doesn’t reflect his true self at all.

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To conclude, I’m like everyone with this anime: I don’t know who says the truth, if it was Ardyn or Somnus who was supposed to be chosen, if Somnus is just a cold-hearted man or if he has a backstory that explains his attitude like this anime excuses in some way the hatred Ardyn has towards his family during FFXV, or a mix of these options, honestly I don’t know. That’s why I’m making up these theories, to try to understand the story until the DLC will (and I really hope) finally answer all our questions about the Lucis Caelums and their destiny.