#hello it is time for prime time shitposting

[ruinaimagines]

Hello, hello! Quite happy to see you back, was getting a bit worried seeing you be inactive for so long! That aside I was curious what your thoughts would be on how the Sephirah would react to an employee teaching nothing there to shitpost!

These poor poor sephirah… And thank you for the concern! I assure you that even if I depart I am likely a-okay. This was a fun one, hope you enjoy

Sephirah Reacting to an Employee teaching Nothing There to Shitpost Headcanons:

Malkuth would be absolutely baffled upon hearing whatever ungodly things you taught this aleph to mutter. It’s enough to make even a workaholic like her freeze in her tracks with sheer confusion. Why.. Did you teach it to say that?? She imagined that an employee capable of repeatedly working with such dangerous abnormalities would be a bit more mature.. Her assumption was wrong. She might scold you a bit but I think she’s too fascinated with it to actually care too much. Usually she always has something to say.. But this? No words. Kind of thinks some of the bizarre things you taught it to say are funny but would never admit that because she does not want to tarnish her attempts at being the prime sephirah.

Lord, I think you would send Yesod into cardiac arrest. Probably calls for a meeting to figure out who’s responsible for this and chastises their immature behavior being unbefitting of a corporate employee. It depends on how good you are at keeping a poker face because his pure seriousness about this is absolutely priceless. You’d think he was yelling at you for kicking his dog or something. Sighs with a really stressed tone and probably utters something under his breath as the meeting ends. If you are found out you’re likely going to get a huge scolding and have to work overtime. It’s worth it though.

Hod is sort of nervous first and foremost because she is concerned about the safety and potential repercussions you can experience for training an abnormality in such a way. After seeing how much fun it is for you though she’d support it considering the place is usually so dark and dreary.. It’s a nice contrast to see some people enjoying themselves. Doesn’t understand half of the things the meat dog is saying, but over time you may find she is gradually developing a quiet sense of humor towards the stupid things you do.

Netzach helps you. He does not care at all for this place, let alone formality, so you can guarantee he’s probably making his own suggestions. Also finds it funny to see Yesod so distressed over this. He doesn’t really interact with the abnormality itself but he will cover for you if you need it, implying it's someone else or even taking the blame altogether just so you can get away with it. You two are a devious duo and there is an impending sense of dread whenever you are in the vicinity. This is pretty much the only time he puts effort into planning things out and it’s all for some dumb humor. Definitely have inside jokes.

Tiphereth is like Yesod but worse. Huffs about how she’s the child yet you keep acting like one, doesn’t get half of the things Nothing There says but immediately knows it’s something bad, and can always tell when you are plotting something. If you work in her department with the abnormality, she has on multiple times threatened to move you out, and has even gone through with it once. It somehow does not stop you. Stares at you with the intensity of 50 suns the moment you have the audacity to step in the slightest direction of Nothing There. She has scrounged every single part of the corporation’s terms and conditions to find some rule you’re violated, and made multiple reports on why you can not keep getting away with this. Only Yesod really agrees.

Chesed is thoroughly entertained by this. He may not outright participate like Netzach, but he silently encourages it by urging you to continue telling your stories. Most of the time he’s just sitting around doing work in his office so he’s not going to say no to something new. Doesn’t really take part in your scheming but always knows when something is done because of Tiphereth, it’s his alarm that you’re up to trouble. Has hosted you in his department to hide away from the others like a fugitive before.

Gebura hates abnormalities. She does not understand why you are doing this, especially when it poses an unnecessary threat to your own safety. Overall views abnos like Nothing There as detestable creatures incapable of domestic feats like training. That said, hearing it cuss out and insult employees –even sephirah– at times is pretty funny. It says things that no man working there would ever have the courage to, and that bluntness is laughable at times. She believes that if you are going to mess around with it somehow then this is one of the least awful ways.

Hokma is too tired for this man. He’s old and too caught up in philosophical ramblings. Doesn’t necessarily tell you to stop, but if you bring it up he will turn it into what feels like a 4 hour session dissecting the implications that’s vaguely reminiscent of when grandparents go ‘back in my day’ and proceed to verbally produce an essay. You’ll be asleep by the time he’s finished and remind yourself to never directly approach him about it again. I think he would let you off easy because he totally would have thought about doing this when he was younger.

Binah’s reaction is completely incomprehensible. You’d think by the way she was staring you down with an ominous aura that she was unimpressed by your childish attempts at playing around. You couldn’t be more wrong. She is going to cease an opportunity to mess with people at any point, and will directly help you with getting Nothing There to shitpost. You think Netzach would plan things out? She has a full schedule that she presents to you to optimize the teaching process, carefully plotted out with graphs and condensed sheets of paper. You will figure out how to make it speak full sentences bordering on some revolutionary discovery all because it’s humorous. No one knows she is helping you because she is so good at keeping it hidden behind a neutral look on her face. No one would dare question Binah after all, not with her intimidating composure, which makes it so easy for her to take part (not even you initially thought she would go along with this). It’s a secret alliance between you two.

[havoc-bloom]

Meet The Havocbringer :]

Welcome to the House of The Havocbringer!

(GIFs from Dreams of An Insomniac and Welcome Home. Userbox made by @treats-icon-collection)

Unsure how I haven’t made an introductory post before, but hello! My name is Havoc, artisanal shitposter, artist, horror fanatic, and fanfic writer extraordinaire!

I upload and reblog pretty much anything that interests me; art, stories, memes, heritage posts, you name it. I also make my own OC art and stories! Here’s some facts about me:

I am transmasc and bisexual ❤️

I use they/it/he pronouns 🧡

I am a minor (16 years old) 💛

I have autism and anxiety 💚

I’ve been doing digital art for over four years now and traditional for much longer, cheers to more years of masterpieces! 💙

I am obsessed with the horror genre, FNAF was my introduction and I’ve been hooked ever since 💜

I am completely open to DMs and messages! I’d love to hear what y’all think! 💗

Current Hyperfixations

Dreams of An Insomniac (analog horror series)

ULTRAKILL (video game)

Hollow Knight (video game)

Scarecrow / Jonathan Crane (DCU)

Transformers: Prime (TV Show)

That’s all I can really say about little ol’ me! Have a great time in the House of The Havocbringer!

❌(DNI under the cut)❌

DNI and Trigger List:

Dream stans / Dream SMP

Boyfriends (webcomic)

18+ or NSFW

Hyperrealistic/real images of spiders and maggots (severe arachnophobia!! And maggots really gross me out)

Bigots, racists, homophobes, transphobes, enbyphobes, people who disrespect neopronouns or xenoidentities, etc.

[viscountessevie]

Something There Masterlist

Hello there! This is a masterlist of all things related to my fic Something There  which is about Lord Cassidy from Mr. Malcolm’s List! Since he didn’t get a love interest in the film and he is PRIME HR hero material, I gave him one! Her name is Lady Persephone Parker-Greens and you can read all about her in the links below. This is a childhood best friends to lovers story with marriage of convenience and a touch of forbidden romance. 

It is a long WIP that’s taking me some time to fully write it and I am not sure when I will be done but for the time being I really wanted to share the best moments written for the couple hence me posting my Vignettes as a good middle ground! Happy Reading everyone :D 

Vignettes 

#1 - The Waltz  #2 - The Carriage #3 - The Fantasy 

Snippets 

The One That Started It All  Snippet #2 - As Seen In The Waltz You Are Ungodly [Brought To You By OJC in Emily] 

Miscellaneous

Something There Tag 

BRILLIANT Edit by @minim236 [Serves as inspo for all my Vignette edits!]  Cassephone Coded  [Posts that remind me of Cassephone]  ST Rambles  [Original Posts By Me Shitposting About The Fic] 

[spindashboard]

hello and welcome to the pinned!

I mostly reblog fanart but I can and will include official art, text posts and other stuff. But expect mostly pretty art

(o゜▽゜)o☆

Sometimes I post my own stuff, including lore discussion and general musings!

Extended About and tag system under the cut ^^

I'm mostly familiar with SA1 and onwards, but I absolutely will post things relevant to the classic era so please stick around if you like that, too ^^

I've never read the Archie comics and I'm still catching up on IDW. So far I've read up to The Last Stand in the Zombot arc (I like to collect them as volumes rather than issues). This means I won't really post very much Archie and I will probably have trouble tagging IDW characters, but I try my best! >:')

Also. My favourite character is knuckles :)

Tag System

Usually I tag characters first and the media the post is from. Sometimes extra things like songs or the real time fandubs. Text posts without lore discussions are just tagged "text post", and "audio" includes music and random bits of audio.

i tend to tag fan art as just "art", as that is by far the most common art on this blog. Official art is tagged "official art", which also includes concept art or character sheets. It doesn't include random comic book pages, which will be tagged as archie/idw/etc. Though cover art will be tagged as official!

Also, a note about the "sonic the hedgehog" tag. If it's official art and/or a specific game/piece of media, and Sonic is the only character featured, I tend not to tag it with him because I feel it's a given he's there. General fanart/discussion/etc. featuring him will always be tagged though.

Some tags listed here have no posts associated with them just yet, but I expect will be filled out soon!

Characters

Sonic | Tails | Knuckles | Amy | Shadow | Rouge | Omega | Team Dark | Silver | Blaze | Cream | Cheese | Metal Sonic | Big | Vector | Espio | Charmy | Team Chaotix | Eggman | Robotnik | Maria | Tangle | Whisper | The Chao | Badniks | Wisps | The koco | Emerl | Cosmo | Chip

Media

Classic Era | Sonic 1, 2, CD, 3 & Knuckles | SA1 | SA2 | Sonic 06 | Sonic Unleashed | Sonic Colors | Sonic Generations | Sonic Mania | Sonic Forces | Sonic Origins | Sonic Frontiers

Sonic X | Archie Sonic | Sonic Boom | IDW Sonic | Sonic Movies 1, 2, 3 | Sonic Prime

Special

Art | Official art | animation | text posts | shitposts | lore discussion | audio | real time fandubs SA2, Sonic 06, Sonic Riders, RTF Goes To Hell (Shadow)

Owner Tags

ain speaks | ain's art

[spoofenshmirtz]

hi i have bad ideas,

[president-alpine]

The Autobots and Decepticons have become part of Earth and the humans don't mind

So, a cuter idea than my usually shitpost ideas. But basically, imagine after being on Earth for so long that the Autobots and Decepticons come to see it as a second home.

And that humans can’t see Earth without these giant idiots.

Imagine after the mechs have gotten used to Earth and explored it, they've found places to have fun in or unwind. Sometimes, humans can catch a glimpse of them relaxing or goofing around.

Like on beaches, humans can catch Beachcomber and Bumblebee racing along the sand. Other times you can see the bots playing around in the water and having a great time.

Rarer is seeing the Decepticons chilling on the beach, usually sunbathing on rocks. Almost always, humans will see Starscream declaring himself leader if Megatron accidentally falls off the rock.

Other areas, humans will see certain mechs more often than others.

Such as big cities with towering skyscrapers, humans will see mechs that fly hanging around the area. Seeing them weave around the tall buildings, cling onto the buildings to have a bird's eye view, and just chill on rooftops.

It isn't uncommon to see the Command Trine flying around the city for exercise before taking a break on some helipad on a roof.

Sometimes on long winding roads where trucks are commonly found, humans have spotted Optimus Prime taking a morning drive. He'll even say "hello"

Even scrapyards and junkyards have reported mechs like Constructicons, scientific mechs like Perceptor and Wheeljack, even down to Starscream digging around for stuff.

Humans were at first freaked out by this like, giant robots running around who can level a building!

But after some time, humans have gotten used to them and don't really mind the mechs anymore.

There is an entire dedicated blog to that document sightings of both Autobots and Decepticons in areas. With photos of them doing just random stuff, relaxing, or straight up photobombing.

The top photo on the blog is of Starscream photobombing a fireworks show and wearing his coronation outfit. He looks super photogenic, and no one has any idea how he managed to do this.

Even now, when the mechs accidentally spotted on the livestreams or broadcasts humans are just nonchalant about it.

Like when the weatherman cuts to the live view of the area and the camera catches the mechs hanging around there

News Anchor: “Let’s see how it’s looking outside for the weather.”

Camera cuts to the live view, you can see Star, Warp, and TC flying about

News Anchor: “The weather is nice outside, and even you can see the Decepticons taking a nice flight".

Same thing with the mechs side, the Autobots and Decepticons have slowly become used to the humans. The Autobots are faster than the Decepticons but eventually the cons are okay with humans.

They don't mind if the humans come to watch them or take photos.

Though some makes will make sure they're the star of the photo, like a certain photobombing plane.

Much to Megatron's dismay. XD

[rocketcowboyblu]

Hi! Hello it’s me again (PArdon me lmao)

Since I posted about the Lion king idea of presenting finn, Thought why not give an idea of the entire movie if yall wanna idk write it? Cause I cant write at all. Ignore the spelling and grammar errors Im trying my best. ANYWAY uh have fun reading this mess of an R.D? (Rough Draft)

Alright, its like 10 years or so after the prime invasion. The BFF Squad finished restoring magic to the universe and found out where Adora and Catra hail from, (Magicat hidden kingdom on ethiera, and adora on eternia etc.)   Catra finds out shes magically pregnant and tells adora, adora is like “Holy shit were gonna be moms” SO like the dummy she is goes to glimmer and asks her permission to present her when the kit’s born. (cause its presumably from magicat culture idk u decide) Glimmer agrees and puts it on her to do lists cause yknow queen shit. 

Months later, Finns Born. Swift wind like the annoying loyal steed he is, goes to inform the other princesses of the presentation. (Insert the Circle of life Music) 

The princesses show up along with a bunch of other people cause It’s She-ra’s Heir/Kid. Anyway magicat queen comes and takes Finn and goes to present them (the balcony idk what part of brightmoon looks safe!?) presume the thrusting of them over a balcony. 

Scorpia and Bow are holding each other crying over how cute finn is, Catra and adora are looking at finn feeling so proud and shit, Glimmer is just holding her head staring at these idiots wondering why she even let them live there.

ALRIGHT HERE COMES THE INSANITY.

Behind the scenes, Catra had been helping glimmer with advising and taking over the actual royal advisors job. The R.A aint happy that her job is being taken by a war criminal and fraternizing with Etheria’s Hero. SO With some rogue clones they build a plan to get rid of finn and catra.

FLASH FORWARD 7 TO 9 YEARS LATER. 

Finn’s growing up and needs to learn the difference between play and work, the advisor tells finn that and suggests  adora help them out. so Adora takes Finn out to the whispering woods to teach them about self defense and magic bonding with the planet. 

DT strolls up cause their now Brightmoons babysitter (Much to their Utter Delight) and tells adora that theres some trouble in the LightZone (Frightzone) about clones. Finn wants to come but adora says no cause its dangerous, So DT offers to take finn cause they were gonna round up the Runestone kiddos for a playdate. 

DT and Finn pick up the kids and they get into trouble. Finn has a whole inner monologue about cant wait to be a Hero or something to make adora let them come with em. Cue the Ditching of DT and the Runestone Kids find themselves lost in the whispering woods.

Rogue Clones find them and give chase with laser blasters. Catra finds DT tied up and explains the kids tricked DT and they hear laser fire. So they go and save the kids. 

NOW catra’s a lil pissed and impressed cause Finn manged to trick DT but also left their sights. Catra gives a speech about how much trouble finns in but also quite impressed with their work and tells them that, they’ll show them how to really trick somebody (aka pranks) 

Later that night the advisor and the rogue clones finally finish the plan to get rid of catra and finn. 

A WEEK LATER. Spoiler alert its finn Bday (Oh god here comes the angst)

The R.A suggests a Royal family picnic. Glimmer, Micah, Bow, Glimbow kid, catra, adora, and finn go to the whispering woods cause theres a nice clearing the advisor has “Suggested.”

a mile or so away rogue clones had been herding up the wild beasts of the woods. (Yknow those hog creatures) 

Catra and adora actually have a gift for finn but want it to be a suprise so they ask the advisor what to do, Advisor tells them that theyll take finn to a spot near the picnic and they can give them the gift there.

Advisor puts finn in a spot and then signals the clones.

The ground shakes, the trees start moving, BAM OUT comes running thousands of magic hogs. RUN

Finns on all fours running for their life, their panting and see a spot which they presume will keep them safe. It’s not safe at all. 

Finn bolts into a canyon, and sees a high top rock that SURE LOOKS STABLE. They climb up it.

Back at the picnic advisor runs back to the crew, and tells them what happened, Catra goes haywire and starts bolting towards the canyon, Adora tells bow and glimmer to get help and grab the advisor and head towards finn.

Catra reaches the canyon first, she spots finn on the rock, Jumping down she goes running along in the herd til grabbing finn, Adora and the advisor are watching from the top, Catra is carrying finn and puts them on a platform of the canyon. Catra gets impaled by a running hogs horn, She goes down into the herd.

“CATRAAA!” Adora cries and jumps down into the herd as She-ra to save catra. Finn looks on in horror trying to spot adora and catra. Boom out jumps adora  going up the slide, struggling to carry catras limp body.

Finn goes to climb their way out of the canyon.

Adora is holding catra tightly and is still climbing til she sees the Advisor looking down on them. “Here! Grab onto catra!” The advisor smiles sinisterly. “I’m Afraid I can’t do that adora..” Adora looks at them in confusion. “Goodbye my oldest enemy” The advisors eyes flash green. Adora’s eyes go wide. BAM a burst of magic hits adora causing her to fall with catra.

Finn screams in the distant.

The herd leaves. Its quiet. dust is still kicked up.

Finn looks at their parents bodies on the ground. Limp.

“M-mom’s?” They called out. Knees buckling they go to catra shaking her “Please you gotta get up...”

“What have you done...” The advisor voice tells them.

Finn looks them at in fear “I didn-” “Insolent child! Look at what have you done! You’ve robbed etheria of their greatest heros!” Finns ears fold back, tears flooding their face.

“Get out of here. If you ever show your face here again I’ll have the palace guards kill you” a bright ball of magic formed in the advisors hand.

Finn bolts. the advisor chuckles darkly, for it was only the beginning of a new era.  

Bow and glimmer teleport to area. they spot their friends.

Glimmer shakes catra “Horde scum DONT YOU DARE-” Catra bolts up gasping and then groans in pain “well.. there goes one of my 9 lives.”  catra looks around and sees adora. And now shes screaming at glimmer to heal her. 

The advisor looks ready to run. Glimmer heals adora and adora stirs going “W-what happened?” catra fills her in (catra doesnt know about the advisor she was unconsious.) And they cant find finn. so now its depresso expresso time cause adora cant remeber what happened and where finn is. 

LOL  IHATE WRITING THIS ALREADY. 

Alrighty alrighty. So finn gets lost in the crimson and find Lonnie and the horde kids. (they dont know its catra or adoras kid cause they burnt that bridge) they adopt em for protection and help with digging in the crimson waste mines for gems and whatever else. And finn dyes their hair blond and shaves it to hide their idenity in fear of the advisor.

8 or so years past. Finns like 17 and the horde kids r old LOL

Scorfumas kid stumbles upon finn and they go into conversation about what the hell happened. Finn tells em about how they killed their parents and how they werent allowed near brightmoon cause the advisor would kill them. Scorfumas kid then has to explain that the advisor was now running brightmoon into the ground using their grief to an advantage. Btw kyles singing can u feel the love cause he do be misintruptioning shit. fuckin kyle XD (Lonnie is gonna kill this fool)

LATER FINN LOOKS AT THE WOODS AND OUT COMES YA GURL RAZZLE DAZZLE! Madam razz goes into her time loops and yknow the deal, she goes “Catra is that you dearie?” Finns like “YOU KNOW MY MOM?!” anyway razz leads them to the abandoned fort of grayskull yack yack yeack. Razz tells them that evil comes from power, not from heart, remember who you are type of shit.

Finn finally decides to go home.

Back at brightmoon everythings horrible. its the works yknow? DT got stuck in the “Prison” cause of how they were sus of the advisor.

Just gonna shorten it cause this is so LONG. Finn shows up, catradora are in shock. advisor turns out is the leftover of PRIME so then finn and him fight. Finn wins and here comes one of the newest heros to etheria. GG end of AU LOL

Sorry I dont know what I just wrote. but yeah theres the gist of the idea if yall wanna steal and try to write this shitpost? idk lol thanks for coming to this ted talk

[local-mettaton]

promo bandwagon

It’s Promo Time I guess, cause I’m seein a lot of em on my dash. And so!

Hello. I am Nova (she/her or they/them), and this is my side blog for prime Undertale/Mettaton content because I love this game and one (1) robot. There’s mostly art reblogs, headcanons, and shitposts here, but sometimes my own art! i’m funny i promise

Side note: dni if youre gross (misgender any characters, ship inc*st/p*dophilia, etc)

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 9

oh goody!

well this is it. the Date Chapter. the chapter, in which, the Date happens. lowkey im so fucking hype for this stupid goddamn chapter AAAAAAAAAAAA this is when the sexy got kicked up about seven notches and i know its gonna be a fucking twenty from here on out so LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO

“Is this your date, Ms. Fall?” he asked.

Cinder didn’t look away from Glynda. “Mhm.”

STRAIGHT OUT OF THE GODDAMN GATE WE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A SECOND TO EVEN GATHER OURSELVES JUST STRAIGHT UP HUH!!!!!!!!! ‘is this your date’ im legally dead

What the fuck.

already im fucking THRIVING im so glad this chapter’s mood got encapsulated within the first ten seconds and im definitely gonna have to re-read this chapter for the full unannotated experience OOOOOOOOOH MY GOD IM SO READY

Glynda’s thoughts ricocheted inside her head like coins left in a dryer. A part of her couldn’t understand what was happening and disengaged. The rest of her, grasping for purchase in all this, reasoned that going with Cinder was better than staying here confused, alone, and utterly displaced.

glynda ‘i aint ever had a gf before’ goodwitch at her PEAK right here. like GOD shes gone from ‘cinder’s trying to murder me’ to ‘cinder just plopped me right into a date’ like CINDER. CINDER YR CHANGING GEARS SO FAST. YOU DIDNT EVEN SEND FLOWERS OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

is it because shes a u-haul lesbian or

Higher, Glynda realized the dress itself was backless, revealing the black tattoo she’d seen so often before, perfectly centered between sharp shoulder blades.

this gay energy is BONKERS, quite frankly??????? where did cinder get her dress from? why does she have it? did she buy it just for this fuckery? or will she pull the ‘i just had a this lil number laying around’ line????????? does she wanna seduce glynda to death?????? was this PLANNED OR DID SHE JUST DECIDE SHE WANTED A DATE AND WTH LIFE REALLY IS SHORT ON REMNANT THESE DAYS?????????? cinder fall please explain your workings to the class

maybe Glynda wasn’t the only one who’d become adept at reading her opponent.

👏 when 👏 will 👏 they 👏 kiss 👏 already 👏👏👏👏

me: this is a slowburn also me: if u assholes dont give me this in the next ten seconds-

“Unarmed? As if you could be so helpless.”

cinder’s style of flirting is just. commentating on a person’s deadliness. that’s IT it’s the only TRICK SHE HAS and its working, is the thing,

im reading the description of the table and remembering the shitpost and oh my god i have to draw this???? hell IS real!!!!!! COULDNT YALL JUST TOSS EM IN A PLAIN BOX,

Cinder eyed her from her bastion of dark cushions,

cinder, ass-deep in cushions: this is peak cuddle territory come and join me

Cinder, for her part, seemed delighted Glynda had noticed. Touching the pendant more gently than Glynda might have ever thought her capable of, Cinder said,  “Yours? You didn’t seem to mind parting with it.”

im still deeply enjoying this powermove the novelty NEVER wears off (and at risk of light spoilers i do enjoy its place in this story 👀)

Cinder let the necklace drop, settling against the swell of her bust once more,

/lightly coughs 👀👀👀

im losing my MIND at how gay this bit is i physically cannot HANDLE IT and if they even describe the meal once im gonna pop off cause i am. SO HUNGRY RN. AAAAAAAAAAAA

Cinder indicated a dish of lamb and vegetables, served on a bed of rice and drizzled in some sort of sauce.

SRY THIS ISNT GAY BUT OH MY GOD IM SO HUNGRY I WANNA E A T I T THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD UGHGHGHGHGHGH WHY DID THIS CHAPTER HAVE TO BE TODAY OF ALL THE DAYS,

Glynda cleared her throat, working out: “The Grimm.”

like. GOD WE KNOW GLYNDA IS JUST SO FUNCTIONALLY BAD AT CONVERSATION BUT OF ALL THE THINGS glynda please just. just. stop thinking abt her sexy tattoos for a fifth of a second,

“You can control them.” A sedate blink. For all the world, Glynda might have just commented on the weather.

which is a faux pas for a date!!!!!!!!!!! at least tell her the DRESS IS SEXY WE ALL KNO WHATS WHAT YR THINKIN ABT

Glancing down as though it were being pointed out to her for the first time, Cinder shrugged and adjusted the end of the glove a little higher on her bicep. “And?” 

a quick aside im enjoying how like... visually expressive cinder is in this remaster! i can see her facial expressions and her motions really clearly in my mind’s eye which is a fun little boon if only because i have to redraw this nonsense hjsgdfjhfksgd but cinder’s got a Good Face this time around! A QUALITY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should know by now, there’s something about you that’s simply irresistible to Grimm.”

HERE COMES THE PLOT (and a single surviving line so far... this one sentence has survived all the world could throw at it... we stan)

Cinder straightened, and Glynda saw that this was what she’d been waiting for.

“It isn’t every day the great Glynda Goodwitch kneels before her adversary, is it?”

HELLO??????????????????????????? WHATS THIS WORDING????????? honestly tho for a second i thought she meant like. quite literally and i thought id missed some PROPER SHIT RIGHT THERE BUT YEAH WTH!!!!!!! C I N D E R

“You cheated. You can’t beat me on your own.”

yes glynda we gathered that yr a top

“Really, Glynda? Poison?” she sneered, something like offense simmering in her expression. “After all this?”

looks at the camera

anyway,

god im literally losing grasp of words to say because theres such a charged mood in this scene............. theyre brushing fingers............ trading jabs.......... im slurpin it up babey!!!!!!!! this rly is the BEST remaster of this whole scene it DESERVES this wordcount!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Beat you,” Cinder corrected. “And call it a point of pride.”

yes cinder we gathered yr a brat,

this dynamic is why this fic is so fuckign good when will winter have a swift return to add even more fuckery to this wild ride

Then, with a heavy-lidded look, Cinder found Glynda’s hand between them, the touch so sudden and daring that Glynda flinched. The fabric of those gloves was smooth against Glynda’s flesh, and for all that cruelty had marked every other instance of contact between them, Cinder was surprisingly gentle.

whomp there go my nuts

WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO MADE THE EXECUTIVE CHOICE TO ADD THIS LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO???????????? im losing my BRAINCELLS

What she wasn’t ready for was for Cinder to guide her hand to her own throat and hold it there.

THERE IS IT THERE’S THE KINK IT’S BEEN SPOTTED

oh my GOD what even IS THIS WHO ADDED THIS SECTION WHO ALLOWED THIS TO COME TO P A S S WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO????????? HEWWO??????????

Now… Now Cinder interested her.

tbh how can i liveblog this? what commentary can i POSSIBLY add that we arent already all THINKING. we just launched into a level of hell so deep that lucifers gonna have to pull some goddamn tricks to follow us down here!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS SCENE! THIS MOMENT! IM SCREAMING

Glynda mirrored the expression back at him, and finally, he coughed, not making strong eye contact with either of them. He set their plate before them and hurried out without so much as a check-in.

i just KNEW that was gonna happen JHGDSFGJHKSDF he was gonna walk in on SMTHNG but i didnt think itd be CINDER’S CHOKING KINK,

okay i took a break and ate my weight in roast chicken and we’re back babey

Almost nervously, her fingers carded through her own dark hair, and there, among the locks, Glynda spotted a glimpse of something white, structured and ridged.

AND I AM INSTANTLY KNOCKED BACK UPON MY ASS 👈W👈H😨A👈T👈

It was easier to ignore the rest of it—whatever it was.

glynda you are a fool and a moron im withering into DUST

On no level had she expected those to be Glynda’s words.

then what... did she expect... well probably -- and rightly so -- ‘bitch WHAT ARE THOSE’ TBH

wait sorry i have to jump back because i forgot customary fingerguns on the most brazen bit of Shit yet:

Cinder was occupying herself with something else: the head of a dragon, perched over the door and staring down at the two of them with red, glossy eyes.

👈👈👈😎👈👈👈

okay BACK TO THE FIC

Fangs snapped together around the word.

aka back to me horni

/chanting TEETH! TEETH! TE

okay but the reason i doubled back to catch that fingergun is because we’re getting ass-deep into plot now!!!!!!!!!!! WITCHES AND DRAGONS BABEY......... HERE’S WHAT OFFAL HUNT IS ALL ABT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant rly drop more fingerguns than that because any astute reader will start realising the dots im shouting abt and honestly half the fun of this fic is the ride so >:3c

“Funny. I was sure he would have told you.”

that blow was so low i think cinder hit the concrete with that one

oh god theyre gonna get to the bit and i-

“Is that what all of this has been about? You called me here to remind me that I'm autistic?”

/SCREAMS

The words were delivered firmly, calmly, but Cinder’s response was the opposite, sudden upheaval seizing her. Her expression opened in something akin to panic. “Wh—no? What? No! That's not what I—”

/SCREAMS

oh my GOD CINDER YOU HAVE FUCKED UP LEGENDARILY!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD SHE WAS FELL ASS-FIRST ONTO A LANDMINE OH MY GOD

offal hunt v1 cinder: im totally in control and im playing glynda every step of the way

offal hunt v2 cinder: OH JESUS OH FUCK OH NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT-

Cinder seemed genuinely stressed now, speaking quicker as though trying to bury the last sixty seconds.

i knew this remaster would have sections that would blow me away but this bit really took the fcuking cake DGHSJFSJHFDG holy SHIT this is AMAZING

It was difficult to tell in the low light, but if Glynda wasn't mistaken, there was a bright flush of embarrassment coloring Cinder’s cheeks.

this is SUCH prime content hey remember in one of the early liveblogs that cinder would descend into full dork? WELL THE DESCENT CAME EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pops bottles

“Cinder.” There was a very real line of threat in Glynda’s tone. “Don’t.”

oh this whole scene just keeps getting better i am LOVING this dynamic now!!!!!!! before it was all pretty one-sided so having the conversation rock back and forth is 👌👌👌

That Witch soul of yours—it was designed to void out everything but the prey before you. To be numb to all human emotion. To focus on the hunt and nothing else.

finally the fruit of 50% of my fingerguns COMES TO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! PLOT PLOT PLOT

“This is bullshit.” Jabbing an accusing finger at Cinder, Glynda said, “You’re a liar. You’re a criminal!”

i LOVE glyndas pottymouth in this its such a good like... change from her being strict and formal and teachery and now shes full on gremlin huntress hell YES BABY!!!!!!!!!! GO OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“There’s all kinds of things I bet he never told you.” Cinder continued. “Did you know he was close to your predecessor? The Witch who came before you—they were inseparable.”

SRY IM LIKE STRUGGLIN TO COMMENTATE because so much of this like. speaking as an Old-Ass Reader this is like. a LOT! A LOT HAS CHANGED and yet,,,, stayed the same,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, yall kids WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL CHAPTER LIKE................ 15 FOR THIS SHIT (but like. chapter 15 was different because this chapter used to be like chapter 7? so now everythings moved along so chapter 15 doesnt sound that impressive but trust me it was a different fic back then)

When they fell away, burnt and ruined, she could see Cinder’s bare arms for the first time. The red lines drawn across her skin sloped down the entire length of her arms, circling her elbows, carved into her wrists. They ended right at her hands, ensuring any long-sleeved garment would hide them. Every covered inch of her was filled like a canvas, like abstract art.

lets pause the fight scene for glynda to be gay!!!!! god im. okay look i said this earlier but im so glad we have more cinder like this tbh. the first version was rly lacking w/ cinder content until late-game when the plot sorta. got itself going? but now we’re eye-deep in this content i LOVE cinder i love this WEIRDO who is a HUGE LOSER and IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Glynda could not dispel the fear that she had been telling the truth.

and after committing Some Amount In Damages, we’re at the end of the chapter!

okay so i really enjoyed this version SO MUCH MORE. everything abt it was polished and worked together so much better and it really needed the space to breathe in its own chapter. its been horny, gay, intense, hilarious, and way more in one chapter and its SO good this really is PEAK offal hunt!!!!!!!!!!!! good job diesel and kc but im still going to murder you both,

[leinbow]

Hello Leinbow-san I always love hearing your opinion on bnha related stuff and I don't know if you got asked something similar before but how old do you think Shigaraki and Dabi are? and Toga and Twice? I'm really bad at guessing ages so I wanna know your opinion! :D

Hello anon!!

Awww, I didn’t realize there’s some of you who likes to read my opinions because of the time I’m just shitposting lmao thank you!!

Anyway, I think I’ve made a post like this somewhere before, but I can’t find it anymore :

So for Shiggy, I think he’s around late teens - early 20′s, because:

He is Shimura Nana’s grandson. If you recall, when Nana’s husband got killed because of Heroics, Nana gave up her son to a foster family because she didn’t want her son to get involved with the hero world. So Nana’s son = Shiggy’s dad.

ANYWAY. She was at her prime when this happened, so I assume she was in her 30′s then and her son was too young to remember her. I also assume she was around the same age as Gran Torino if she’s still alive. So those events happened around… 40-ish years ago?

So if Nana’s son had a kid in his 20′s, then that same kid would be around 20′s too. The math adds up! At least I think so!!! LOL

As for Dabi, I also think he’s around the same age as Shiggy. Late teens - early 20′s, because:

I believe in the Todoroki Dabi theory!

In the Todoroki family page in the Ultra Archive databook, it says there that Todoroki has an older brother that’s close to his age. So I assume it’s Dabi

For Toga, well, she was introduced as a highschooler, so we can assume she’s the same age as Class 1-A kids or so. So maybe 16-18.

However, it would be funny to think that Toga is actually older than she looks. I made a post about this before, where she considers the school uniform as her “costume” of sorts. She just looks like a highschooler, acts like a highschooler, but she’s actually older. That’s the only way I can explain how she’s so experienced with combat that she almost overpowered Aizawa. Imagine that!!

For Twice, based on his chapter, he’s definitely an adult now, or at least looks like it. Late 20′s to early 30′s I imagine. Would be funny though if he’s like, the inverse of my Toga theory, he just looks and acts old but he’s actually younger lul (but I seriously doubt it)

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 7

when will one of these chapters start with ‘wow murphy’s gonna love this and rly enjoy themself’ WHEN IT IS. I HAVE TO KNOW.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

okay i am Recognising this chapter so we’re not quite yet in untouched, completely Feral territory which is. nice. thats nice. i like it when i know what im working w/ but who the kell hnows.

Something nagged at her. A forgotten thing. She thought hard, but even so, it took a long moment for her to remember.

me when i go to my room to fetch my dishes for the washing machine but i get sidetracked by my dog being cute and then i forget and go back downstairs and remember the dishes and then i come back up but my dog is still there and i forget again-

i’m just. rly enjoying this glynda. I SAID IT BEFORE BUT IM RLY THRIVING FOR THIS IDIOT WITH ONE BRAINCELL. THE BRAINCELL IS CINDER.

Glynda’s hunting instincts were primed, the only part of her that worked with absolute clarity, even now.

this is why she hasn’t noticed cinder’s flirting, the fool, the blithering idiot,

In the split second before she faded from consciousness, she smelled ash, the foreign Aura within her flaring until she could taste it: burning flesh and steady decay. Then it disappeared, fizzling out.

hm. is it a callout to say this is. romantic. this is kinda romantic. hey is this? gay? i think its gay. im gonna settle on it.

its gay.

When she awoke the next morning, it was like pulling herself from some great void,

H👈A😎H👈

for some reason THAT was the fingergun that made me spill juice all over my keyboard i see how it is

Then she remembered that at Beacon, her blood usually stayed inside her body.

im thriving for this weird observation. you know when you wake up somewhere new like a hotel or smthng and for a moment yr like ‘where am i’ and u figure it out thru like. normal fucking means. like oh thats not my duvet oh thats not my ceiling oh thats not where my window is-

and then glynda has to judge her location by how much blood of hers is spilled in it. this bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE GOT ONE BRAINCELL AND OFFAL HUNT IS THE THESIS TO PROVE IT-

It was the room she’d all but dissembled in after getting her ass kicked and then saved by Cinder Fall.

sorry im going HOG WILD on quotes but these new lines r SO GOOD and im LIVING for them....................... like until now we’ve had glynda goodwitch, terrifying unstoppable woman and occasional dipshit. now shes all dipshit. just 100% pure dipshit. spread her on a field and you couldnt tell her from the manure. a complete buffoon.

that said its nice to see glynda using her Brainmess for once... i mean she still wont be able to put an otherwise fuck-ton of clues together still because that requires, the ability to multitask, which is surely does not have, but finally she’s taking five fuckin minutes to let herself go ‘well THATS weird’.

There had only been a stirring of life along those red-vein tattoos, swirling just along the cut of Cinder’s dress.

im enjoying the new ‘sexey tattoos’ slant we’re seein in this remaster it was a real shame they didnt get primetime attention last time.

also glynda Why Ya Lookin,

Hello,

she’d be a heretic to the Law of Semblances twice-over,

I May Not Know My Semblances, But I Know A Bitch When I See One!

For the first time in years, Glynda wanted to set everything aside and rest.

we stan a sleepy bitch................ ugh im so glad she’s finally realising she needs 2 give herself some mfing slack!!!!!!!!!!!!!! because as much as im enjoying the Dragfest she rly needs to. chill.

When she finally emerged from the bathroom, a towel around her waist and her dirty clothes balled in her hands,

look i didnt make this blog to lie that my first reaction to this was tilting my head and going ‘tiddy out? tiddy? is the tiddy out? tiddy?’

look women look hotter doing all the things guys do and this is fact i wont sit down and i Wont Shut Up

No more rushing ahead and getting herself torn up for nothing.

H👈A😎H👈!

thats a Good One, Glynda,

Winter Schnee had the pale white hair of her bloodline, and the sharp features of the famously reclusive Willow Schnee.

YES BITCH WE ARE IN IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! POP THOSE MFING BOTTLES

i have been WAITING. FOR WEEKS. 7 FUCKING WEEKS I HAVE SAT HERE AND WAITED AND IT FINALLY PAID OFF OH MY GOD MY BITCH IS IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As Ozpin had said, she was twice the age of the younger Schnee daughter, and her blue eyes held all the acuity that age had brought her.

i made a Sound at this i CAN SEE WHAT YOU DID. I SEE IT. I SEE IT,

A single photo hung on the wall next to a placard detailing some kind of award. Glynda pushed her glasses up on her nose to get a better look. Though it had the appearance of a family photo, only the women of the Schnee family were present, Willow and Weiss flanking a newly ranked Winter.

why am i being targeted directly anyway

safdjhgfsdajgh WINTER,....... im still. im Love w/ this main bitch finally... Finally.... i love winter in offal hunt so fuckign much and im so glad she’s here and that we’re getting more details because AAAAAAAAAAAAAA i love her!!!!!!!!!

also i cant.... say anything because spoilers..... but also............. NNNNNNN this convo has just. so much behind it. SO MUCH CONTEXT. its Killing Me,

A strange expression crossed Winter’s expression. It looked like how bruises felt.

im losing my fucking mind rn diesel and kc are going right to hell and they know it but do they care???????????? no. they already are the devil,

okay i went silent for ages and read ahead because i screamed in discord for like ten minutes and it looked like this

so YEAH theres that, i guess,

Instead, it only filled her with deep unease. Glynda didn't know what Cinder’s game was, but it was becoming clear that it did not align with her own. And the more she thought about it, the less she understood. The less she understood, the more wary she became.

cinder: i wanted to tell this girl i liked her so i wrote her a note that said get out of my desert,

im rly thrivin in this chap i already said it but we’re rly jumping into the meat n bones of the Plot now and its a Good Plot so im excited!!!!!!!!!

“Yes, I think you’ll like her!”

“she’s a lesbian, like you, so maybe her distinguished energy will chill your dysfunctional energies out-”

Glynda pressed her lips; she needed a delicate hand here, needed to carefully choose a response which would divert Ozpin away from the topic. “No reason.”

YES MY FAV LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is Big Me and literally this is MAYBE the best and also funniest line in this entire shitshow remembers the Pasta Bit and /sweats

i also rly enjoy glynda n ozs friendship... i mean im out here remembering the glynda/ozpin/cinder fic so i was already sold on all their interactions but its rly good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GLYNDAS BEST FRIEND MAY BE 200 YEARS OLD BUT GOD DAMN IT WHEN WILL YR BFF EVER BE THERE FOR U LIKE THAT,

theres a Bit here im not gonna go into but. honestly once u kno how offal hunt basically ends? Its Sad and Im Sad. i hate how knowing this whole thing just inflects on everything else and everything glynda wants and honestly this whole fic sucks. why am i reading this AGAIN.

“I have faith in you, Glynda. But there are terrible things that can be done to a person even without killing them.”

👈😢👈

we’ve popped the first sad fingerguns but also What The Literal Fuck, Oz,

“Come and catch me, then.”  

im LAUGHING this is much better than the first version because this is SUCH a cinder-brand of shit to say dsfjhgfds she’s SUCH A SHIT-STIRRER but i love her,

“She’s just sent me something. My Scroll is working fine, but I think it’s safe to assume she knows what we’re discussing.”

“What did she send you?”

“An invitation.”

oh finally glynda works out the whole CCT business JHGDSFSDF i wonder if cinder knew shed figure it out or saw her msgs to oz and went ‘ah shit well’

BUT YEAH..... DATE! DATE! DATE! HOT DATE WITH CINDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am. VERY excited as many of u will remember i made a prime shitpost abt That Chap back in the day and ill have 2 REDRAW IT!!!!!!!!! POPPIN BOTTLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway this chapter sucked and was also very good in equal measure. as it is Wont,