#heard it again on the radio and just wanted to scream with rage and frustration | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

honeybunnybeez · 4 years ago

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HELLO! I was wondering if you do like paternal smp? If you do then I have this idea! It’s in the final control room in the first war. You’re erets child, when he pressed the button you realized your father just betrayed you and your friends-SOMETHING LIKE THAT! THANKS :D

"No other way" (ANGST) (PLATONIC)

♡Parent!Eret x Child!reader

♡Summary: You didn't know why your father wanted to keep you away from viewing the secret weapon he claim he had. What was so scary that he felt the need to ask you to leave thrice?

♡Gender Neutral Reader!

"(Y/n), love?"

"Yes?"

"It still isn't too late to turn back now," Eret reminds you once again as you 6 make your way through a narrow hallway where you father claims he's kept the secret weapon.

You let out a groan as you step down another step, frustrated and confused as to why he would ask that question for the 3rd time since you all left for this place.

"I've already told you I wanted to follow. Why ask if I would like to come only to ask if I would like to walk away now?" You didn't mean for it to sound rude, but you wanted to state your point. If a simple 'no, I want to keep going,' isn't clear enough for him he should at least explain why he keeps asking.

"I just, don't want you to get scared of what you'll see, that's all."

His reason didn't seem to sound all that complete and you didn't really like that. Before you could ask him to clarify, Tommy speaks up.

"Scared? After all the shit they've seen? A little weapon isn't going to scare them none, right (y/n)?"

Distracted by Tommy's subtle praise you forget about your question and choose to grin proudly at Tommy's words, "yeah, it isn't!"

Despite how he is, Tommy's always been one to tell you how brave and strong you are and how he knows that you'll grow up to be a complete badass, just like the rest of them. Despite his mean behavior, he's the most supportive of your growth out of everyone.

"Didn't you scream earlier when a bat flew over us?" Fundy adds causing the rest of them to laugh.

"Hey! In my defense those fuckers pop out of nowhere-"

"(Y/n), language. You're only 12," your father reprimands lightly, but you don't miss the smile in his voice.

"(Y/n), swear louder, make it echo!"

"Tommy, don't make (y/n) turn out to be a gremlin child like you," Wilbur scolds playfully.

"Excuse you, I am the perfect role model for them!"

You can't help but laugh and listen on with fondness as you hear them all start to bicker with one another.

You're little resistence group was far from perfect, but they were your best friends, your family. So of course you were hurt when your father kept asking if you wanted to stay back. You wanted to be there with them during every big moment, you didn't want to leave them behind.

"Eret, what is this?" You hear Tubbo ask.

Finally snapping out of your thoughts, you notice a little blackstone room at the end of the long hallway. There were chests sitting in them too, all with signs to show who they belonged too, and you even had your own!

"This is the final control room," your father explains, looking around.

"This is amazing," you say in awe. You look around to see the others having the same kind of reaction too.

You can't help yourself from opening the chest with your name on it. Upon opening it though, there wasn't anything in it. That was odd.

"There's nothing in the chest," Wilbur exclaims before you get the chance to. You turn to look at him and witness as Wilbur's face changes from confused to concern as he looks over at Tommy who checks out the button in the middle of the room.

"What does the button do?"

"Tommy-!"

Something can be heard clicking and opening and before you know it, four armed men appear seemingly out of nowhere to ambush and kill off your friends.

"WAIT, NO-!"

Before you can react and aid them in combat, your father knocks your sword out of your hands with his pickaxe, dragging you into another hidden room with him.

"Fuck, (Y/n)-!" You can hear Tommy's cries end quick as the sound of his body falling onto the floor quickly follows suit.

"You traitor!" You hear Wilbur scream out before he too meets the similar fate his friend has.

You scream for mercy through the blackstone wall, begging them not to hurt your friends but it's too late. You don't hear anymore screams or the sound of swords clashing with one another. It's all just radio silence and it happened far too quick for you to truly process that this is all real.

Something your father steps on opens the hidden blackstone door once again and he steps out of the room with a smirk and a salute.

"Down with the revolution boys!"

You don't how to react, all you can do is stare wide eyed at the four lifeless bodies of your friends slowly fading away from where they lay.

They cheer, the bastards you've been taught to hate cheer and your father is cheering alongside with them. The man who took you in when no one else would, the man you trusted with every fibre of your being, is celebrating with the enemy.

"It was never meant to be."

Hearing your father say that causes all the rage bubbling inside of you to burst and for the first time in a while, you let out an ear piercing scream that echoes through the room.

"HOW COULD YOU!?"

All five men turn to look at you, the bastards still have grins on their faces but your father's face made you feel the sickest. He had the audacity to look at you with such worry, such concern.

"(Y/n)-"

"THEY WERE OUR FRIENDS,FATHER!"

He tries to open his mouth to speak again but you don't give him the chance to, cutting him off before he could even get a letter in.

"AND EVEN IF THEY WEREN'T YOUR FRIENDS, THEY WERE MINE FOR FUCKS SAKE, THEY WERE LIKE FAMILY TO ME! THEY WERE MY FAMILY AND YOU BACKSTABBED THEM!"

You heart starts to ache further and the tears you were trying so hard to hold back fall with no end in sight. You start to wonder if they think you were part of this plan as well and if they hate your guts too. God, you hope that isn't the case, you don't think you could take it if they hated you when you still loved them back.

He tries to come closer, tries to hug you but you use all the strength you can muster to shove him away, and you do a pretty good job at moving him back and shocking him.

"Don't touch me!" You cry out, wiping away the tears that blur your vision. "Don't ever touch me again, you fucking traitor!"

A chuckle can be heard coming from behind your father as you scream at him.

"Well, looks like someone has a tantrum on their hands," the joke Dream gives causes the other three members of his group to laugh and you can't help but grit your teeth and clench your fist as you struggle not to argue back or stab him right through his ugly mask.

"(Y/n), please, listen to me," he pleads, but your head is starting spin from the stress and you're trying to block out any and all sounds in the room. Begging any higher power above that this is just a nightmare. A scary nightmare that you'll soon wake up from with Tommy and Tubbo sleeping close by just as half haphazardly as you are.

"Why?" You whimper out before you can stop yourself. "Why did you do this."

You can't help but take a few steps back as he walks over to you and kneels down to your level. It hurts your father's heart to no end to see you terrified of him, acting like a skittish stray kitten from a village. He starts to doubt his actions for a moment when he sees how frantic you are, but a ringing promise in his head is what reminds him of why he did what he did.

"I did it so we would be safe. So that you could be safe," his voice is barely above a whisper as he says so, like he doesn't want anyone else to hear. Dream gives a quick glance, like he knows something, but he doesn't comment, choosing instead to continue talking the the others.

You shake your head, refusing to accept his bullshit answer, "There could've been another way, you didn't have to do this-!"

He tried to find other ways, he swears, but Dream knew too much and held too much power against him, against everyone. He could take everything away from him, he could take you away from him and he couldn't have that. Sure he now had a target on his head with the resistance, but it's better than having Dream target both him and you. He doesn't tell you all of this though, not yet, it isn't the right time to.

"(Y/n)," your father tries once again to hold you and this time you can't find any power left within you to shove him off again. So you let him hug you, but your arms remain firmly planted to your side, fighting the urge to hug him back for comfort.

"Trust me, there truly was no other way..."

A/N: DID SOMEONE CALL THE ANGST DOCTOR? :D Ah, lord, I had a little too much fun with this but I may have gone out of topic and ooc so I'm very sorry if I did! I've read the parental smp stories before and I adore them to absolute bits so I may have squealed when I got this ask. Thank you anon for the request and I hope you all enjoyed it as well!

(Requests are open and anon is on!)

#mcyt x reader #mcyt imagine #dream smp x reader #dream smp imagines #eret x reader

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siriushxney · 4 years ago

Text

⊱┊ easily !

pairing — sapnap x gn!reader

wordcount �� 2k

warnings — angsty, arguing (happy ending)

song — easily | bruno major

note ! — this is my second time reposting, because tumblr hates my guts and decides to make things repeat/disappear so :|

nothing was easy about love. then again, if love didn’t have it’s bumps and bruises — could it truly be considered love? the act of loving someone is something that is both a blessing and a curse wrapped into one. you see their best, and you see their worst — you deal with, and take all the blows that they take.

and in with love — arguments flare.

some over stupid things, like who would do the dishes, if the other did the laundry, what you were having for diner — but some were harsher. words that neither meant, thrown at the other without care or thought behind them, and actions that despite being little, spoke thousands.

when love begins to bring stress from the arguments, it brings along doubt, anger, and fear. the nagging feeling at the back of your mind that is constantly telling you that you don’t mean anything to them, that you can be easily replaced, that quitting is a valid choice — distance makes an appearance between the two of you.

but when one pulled away, the other reached and pulled them back. it was what love was.

—

sapnap and you had always been an honest couple. sharing everything and anything, never scared to speak your mind, and not afraid of confrontation. but with the both of you being strong willed and blunt, things could get tangled and rough in a matter of seconds — and as of lately, things were rough more than they were enjoyable. fights happened daily, food was consumed in silence, and you had gone to sleep in the guest bedroom. the distance that was now between the two of you was easily notable — even his viewers had noticed something in him had shifted.

with your laptop sat one your lap, you typed away — the assignment that was due in merely a week adding to the already present stress. everything had seemed to be going wrong lately — the topic you were given to research happened to be one of the topics that you had not been quite able to grasp, you had somehow lost your favourite pair of shoes, and everything with sapnap.

you love him, that wasn't something you questioned — but the thoughts of if it was worth it with the direction that the two of you were heading in, plagued your mind. did you want to put yourself through the pain that would come eventually? or did you want to protect yourself from it to the best of your ability?

the words you typed appeared on the screen quickly, but just as fast as they appeared, you were quick to erase them. everything you had typed didn’t quite come out the way you wanted them to — but no matter how much you deleted and retyped them, nothing else came to mind. it almost reminded you of sapnap and your relationship.

after every fight, an apology would be said, but nothing would change. within the next twenty-four hours or less, another one - just like the previous - would take place. you were backspacing, and then rewriting the same thing, over, and over again.

with a frustrated sigh, you closed the laptop and pushed it aside to where your books laid. your hand came up to harshly rub at your sore and tired eyes, wishing that a calm and restful sleep would overcome you. but that was simply a figment of hope that your brain came up with. you had too much to do, to be resting.

the thump of your feet hitting the ground, the loud cracks and pops from stiff joints, and a small grunt filled the room. after sitting in one position for hours, you'd expect your body to be stiff.

“stupid professor, and his stupid assignments,” you huffed as you exited your room, turning your head quitioningly towards sapnap’s recording room, waiting and listening for any sign of him streaming. with no sudden shouts, curses, or screams, you assumed he wasn't — that meant either two things, one, he was in your shared room, or he was downstairs. you hoped it was the previous.

tiptoeing down the stairs, you attempted not to make a noise in the case that he was on the main floor, not wanting to face him after your most recent fight. but the universe seemed to be working against you, as you saw his frame laying on the couch with a movie playing quietly on the tv.

despite being as quiet as you possibly could have been, he had noticed your entrance — his head tilted in your direction before turning his attention back to the movie with a now present frown.

he’s such a child.

then again you were no better.

this game of he said, they said was annoying to you — but in this situation, you felt as if you were correct, just like how he felt like he was correct. neither of you would admit that the other was just as right as you were, both desperate to take a win over the other.

grabbing your keys from the counter top, you started for the front door — your shoes easily being slipped on before you grabbed for the door handle.

“where are you going?” no movie could be heard playing anymore, making it easy to hear sapnap’s voice — something that had been spoken with an emotion that you refused to believe was there — worry.

“I’m just going to the convenience store.”

a small thump, followed by quick footsteps towards your directions caused an unwanted smile to appear on your face. but as quick as it appeared, it was wiped off. sapnap came around the corner, grabbing his shoes and not bothering to put them on — simply holding them in his hands as he gave you a shooing movement.

“c’mon. I’ll come with,” sapnap pushed passed you, through the front door, and towards your car in a haste.

“... okay then.” you closed the door behind you as you stepped out, making sure to lock it before heading to the drivers side — sapnap already sat comfortably inside with his knees and head facing his window.

he was still going to be stubborn, huh?

—

the drive was silent — not that you expected anything else. the music wasn’t even playing loudly — merely soft background noise to keep the both of you from going more insane then you already were. the drive itself should’ve been only six minutes top, had turned into ten — every light being red rather than the preferable green.

your car lurched forward as you angrily slammed your foot on the brake at yet another red light — sapnap and you being abruptly launched forward before coming back and hitting the seat.

“jesus, calm down would you?”

“don’t even start with me,” you didn’t have to look at him to see the way his eyes furrowed and frown deepened.

“what the hell is your problem lately-”

“what the hell is my problem?! you — you're my problem lately, sapnap!” you whipped your head over to him, watching the immediate look of hurt cross his face before it contorted into one anger.

“you know I’m trying here — I thought that us going out somewhere we usually go to would help us, but apparently I was wrong!” sapnap through his hands up in rage. “you make everything so difficult! why can’t you for once in your life, just stop arguing with everything I say and do?!”

the red light still shone brightly — no sign of it changing. and with no cars other than your own on the road at this time of night, there was nothing other than the deep breathing, and the quiet music playing from your radio. neither of you said a word — both of you still trying to wrap your head around not only the others, but your own words.

words that you never meant to, or should’ve said.

you turned your head away from him, trying to hide the way your eyes gleamed with fresh tears — but when they tried to make their way down your face, you brought your palms up to your eyes and pushed. the pressure of your palms helped keep not only the tears, but your anger in.

“Y/N i’m-”

“please can we just not?”

the apology was on the tip of his tongue.

“what are we doing?”

sapnap could feel his mouth run dry, and his chest tighten.

“what?”

“I mean… what are we doing?” your words came out strained and low, the effects of yelling and being yelled at hitting you full force. “this- us — what are we doing here?”

he didn’t know how to respond — the answer for your question had never crossed his mind. to him, despite the arguing and yelling, him and you would never end — it was the two of you till the end. but with you questioning everything right in front of him, he couldn’t help but panic.

“I’m- we’re-” he tried to put words together, but nothing made sense. he wrote and rewrote a script in his head, pleading for something to make sense, or at least help him bring you out of the hole of doubt and questioning you’ve dug yourself into.

nothing comes easily — not skill, not life, not love. you had to work for everything you have, and you will fall, and get scraped, and fail — but things could always be improved, as long as you fought for it.

“we’re doing something that is right — we’re right,” his words were not enough to make you look at him, but he saw your head lift slightly. “we’re not easy — we’re messy, and mean, and for some reason, stupidly stubborn… but that doesn’t mean that we aren't right — arent perfect in our own way,” your head turned more towards him. “we’re not easy, and to be honest, we never will be. that’s just us. and right now, we're in a rocky part — but just because it won’t come easily, doesn't mean that the road we’re on won’t even out once again. you need to trust me, just like I need to trust you.”

a green light shone down onto the two of you, telling you to go — but just like before, no cars were around. it was just him and you.

“I love you Y/N — and don’t you ever forget or doubt that. I’m an asshole sometimes, but I’d never lie to you about that.”

you wished that the seatbelt that held you stills against your seat could vanish so you could tackle him with a hug — but your place on the road, and the now approaching car from behind stopped you from doing so. pushing lightly on the gas, you went through the green light, and pulled into the convenience store that you had been on your way to.

sapnap watched as you pulled yourself from the car quickly, the sense of ache and worry taking over his body as he pulled himself out of the car after you. “look, I’m sorry-” a body crashed into his own, nerely knocking him to the ground — harsh, shaking shoulders and wetness was felt against his chest.

“I’m so sorry — for everything,” you didn’t try to hide your sobs — with the heat of everything going on, you knew it was better to let everything out then to bottle it up. “and I love you so much, you don't even know — everything sucks without you by my side.”

he couldn't stop the tears that filled his own eyes — finally able to hold you again despite the circumstances and what it took to get here. burying his face into the side of your neck, he let his tears fall — the both of you standing, swaying slightly as you let everything go.

you don’t know how long you stayed in the position, but you didn’t care to keep track — your only focus being the boy pressed against you, holding you tightly to his chest, as he whispered soft words of love and apologies.

it wouldn’t come easily, but the least you could do was try.

#::a love like this #mcyt x reader #mcyt imagine #dream smp imagine #dream smp x reader #::sapnap #sapnap imagine #sapnap x reader

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bangtann-bangdamn · 4 years ago

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Lightning: Part 2

Warnings: Unhappy relationship mentioned, but other than that you should be good to go.

Word Count: 4165

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

AN: I originally wrote Lighting in June 2019. It’s March 2021. Also, I feel like my writing style has changed slightly. If it has - whoops. My bad.

< Part 1

Master list

“Can you get me another beer?” Mark called from the living room.

“Why don’t you get off your ass and go get it yourself?” You yelled back, rolling your eyes as you plunged the plate you were washing back beneath the water. It wasn’t like he was doing anything important.

“I’m in the middle of a – die you motherfucker!”

You grit your teeth, holding back your retort. As much as you enjoyed Mark’s company, there were days where everything he did, everything he said, frustrated you. Okay, maybe not days. Lately, it has been all the time.

Sure, he was sweet and affectionate when he wanted to be, but ever since you agreed to move in with him a few weeks ago, you felt less like his partner and more like his mother.

‘For all his faults, Yoongi wouldn’t have done this,’ you found yourself thinking. Immediately, you felt guilty. Yoongi was your past. He had broken up with you. He had made that decision, and you had grown to accept it.

But he also said he missed you. And, no matter how hard you tried to deny it, a small part of you missed him too.

Over and over your encounter with Yoongi replayed in your head. It felt like fate seeing him that day. With the storm raging outside, you had stayed longer than you normally would. All those feelings you thought were gone suddenly resurfaced. You forgot all about the way he would ignore you when he worked, or how he never answered his phone. You forgot all the nights where his side of the bed remained empty. All you could think about was the time you had spent together. Never did he make you feel so small, so insignificant in his life.

The plate you were scrubbing shattered in your hand. You screamed in frustration as blood began to trickle from your palm. You sighed as you picked up the shards from the washing-up bowl, throwing them in the bin with more force than necessary before grabbing a towel from the side and putting pressure onto the cut. You were trying not to cry but tears still found its way down your cheeks.

Mark made no effort to call out and check to see if you were okay. He yelled in frustration as he continued to play whatever game he was currently obsessed with, continuing on as if nothing had happened. Most likely, he hadn’t heard your scream.

It was a sign from the universe, seeing Yoongi that day. A sign that you had made a mistake.

Mark had asked you to move in and you stupidly thought that seeing Yoongi was a sign for you to say yes. But now you knew. You knew that your heart wasn’t in it. Perhaps it never was.

Mark walked into the kitchen. “Fine, I’ll get the beer myself,” he scoffed, barely noting the red tainted towel wrapped around your hand.

“I can’t do this anymore.” You closed your eyes as you held your breath.

“Sorry, I won’t ask you to get me one in the future.” Mark walked out of the kitchen without a second glance.

You followed him. “No, you don’t get it. I’m done.”

Mark sat down on the sofa. “Okay,” he said as he picked up the controller and resumed his game.

You stared at the back of his head as he took a sip of his beer, waiting for him to ask you. But you knew it was futile. Mark would assume you were joking and would give you a few hours to calm down before he would talk to you. Then he would brush away any concern you had with a laugh and tell you you were overreacting again.

You shook your head, deciding that you didn’t want to have this fight. You didn’t want to be told that you were crazy, your feelings unjustified. You didn’t want to feel tired anymore.

You inspected the cut on your hand, quickly determining that it was not deep enough to require stitches. You grabbed the first aid kit from beneath the sink and quickly set to bandaging your hand before walking back into your bedroom. You grabbed your suitcase from under the bed and began packing your things.

Déjà vu hit you like a freight train. But, unlike with Yoongi, you found that your tears had stopped the moment you had decided to leave. It was a relief not to deal with Mark anymore, as bad as you knew that sounded. But ever since you ran into Yoongi all those weeks ago, things had changed. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t help but compare Mark to Yoongi. How Mark didn’t know you as well as Yoongi had, or how he couldn’t make you smile as easily as Yoongi had.

Seeing him again reminded you of how hard it was to leave. How much you missed him, despite everything.

And when it came to Yoongi, Mark never really stood a chance. It sounded horrible to admit, but Mark was only ever a distraction. A reason for you to stop thinking about Yoongi.

You rolled your suitcase out of the bedroom and down the hall. At the sound of the wheels rolling across the wooden floor, Mark paused his game to look at you.

“Where are you going?” he asked, looking between the suitcase and you.

For this, he paused his game, you couldn’t help but think.

“I told you, I’m done.”

By the time you sat down on the bus, you were sweating slightly. It was a little from the humidity that still clung to the early evening air that had made the walk almost impossible. But mostly it was because of the panic that had settled in the pit of your stomach.

What if you had made an impulsive decision? What if Mark was the one and you just left him?

You were leaving him on what your heart wanted: Yoongi. But now that your mind had a chance to catch up, it screamed at you. Yoongi might have moved on, or he might not have changed. Sure Mark wasn’t the easiest to get along with, but he was there. He came to bed every evening. He ate dinner with you every evening. He replied to texts an-

Your phone started ringing. Mark. You stared down at the screen for a moment, wondering what he could possibly have to say to you before you declined the call. Almost immediately, Mark called again. So you switched it off.

It took you almost an hour to get to Hwasa’s house. You could feel your nose burning with unshed tears as you knocked on her door. She answered the door on your fourth knock. She had her phone wedged between her ear and shoulder, accessing you before she spoke.

“Haven’t seen her, Mark,” she said, nodding her head at you to follow. She moved back into the house as you let yourself in, closing the door behind you. You left your suitcase at the bottom of the stairs as you kicked off your shoes and followed Hwasa into the living room. She was sprawled out on the sofa rolling her eyes at whatever Mark was saying on the other end of the phone. You took a seat on the armchair beside her.

“I’m telling you, Mark, I don’t know where she is. Now if you excuse me, my pizza is here.” She hung up, rolling her eyes. “You broke up with Mark?” She raised her brow at you as she tossed her phone down beside her.

“Yeah?” You played with your hands in your lap, avoiding Hwasa’s gaze.

“About time,” Hwasa muttered, grabbing the remote from the coffee table and turning the TV on.

“Wait, I thought you liked Mark?”

“I do. But anyone with eyes could see that you weren’t happy.”

You frowned. “I thought I was happy.”

“I know. That’s why I didn’t say anything.” Hwasa leant forward, placing her hand on your knee. “It’s the duty of a best friend to know when to say something. And when to bite her tongue. I knew you were unhappy, but I also knew you were heartbroken. You needed to date Mark to heal, to get over Yoongi.”

“Oh.” You tucked your feet beneath you as you turned your attention to the TV. The news was playing, detailing some study a university was doing into attraction.

“Oh? Oh god, don’t tell me that you broke up with Mark to go back to Yoongi?”

“Not exactly...”

“Are you stupid? He broke you. Or did you conveniently forget the month and a half you spent locked up in here barely eating and crying your eyes out because he didn’t even call? Even Mark called.”

“Yoongi works differently, you know that. He won’t tell you how he feels, he’ll-”

“Write you a song. I remember your anniversary present.”

You smiled at the thought. For your first anniversary, Yoongi made you a CD. He wouldn’t tell you what songs he had put on there, but when you had listened you knew. He had asked a friend to sing the chorus, whilst he had rapped the verses. There was something about the way he rapped, so confident and quick in his deep voice, that had you downloading it onto your phone and listening to it whenever you could.

“I miss him,” you admitted softly.

“I know. But does he miss you? He might say he does, but…” She left her words hanging in the air.

As much as you hated to admit it, you knew she was right. Yoongi made his feelings known through music. If he wanted you, there would be a song.

And in the year since you left, there was none. It was hard to argue against the concrete facts.

So why did it feel like you had just broken up all over again?

Yoongi was nervous. Well, maybe nervous wasn’t the right word.

Terrified. He was terrified.

After writing his song, he had asked Namjoon for his opinion. Namjoon had been lost for words – literally and metaphorically. He had thought the song was perfect, yet Yoongi felt like something was missing. Only, no matter how many times he listened to the song, he couldn’t put a finger on what it was. He had managed to persuade his company to give him a few extra weeks to work on it, to make it perfect. But no matter how many times he tinkered with it; the song just didn’t seem right.

He shook his head to clear his mind. It was a little too late for that now. In the end, he had to hand it over; he had wasted enough time. Now, nearly three months after he had written it, he sat in the green room of the radio station.

“Yoongi, are you ready?” The producer beckoned him to follow.

Yoongi nodded, rising to his feet slowly.

It wasn’t his first radio interview, nor would it be his last. But it was the first time a radio station was debuting one of his songs live on air.

You might be listening to this. You might hear this song. You might hear him.

He wasn’t sure if the idea of you hearing his song made him want to jump off a cliff or jump for joy. All he knew for certain was that he was out of time.

Every day since you left, Mark had made the point of visiting you at work.

“I can’t talk to you right now.” You continued to fill the dishwasher, not bothering to look back at Mark as you spoke. “What part of ‘I’m at work’ do you not understand?”

“You won’t answer my calls.”

You placed the last cup in the dishwasher. “We broke up. I don’t need to answer your calls.” You closed the dishwasher, grabbing a cloth and began wiping down the counters. The counters didn’t need to be wiped down - Hwasa had taken care of them just before Mark had walked in. But Mark didn’t know that. And you were determined to do anything to make it look like you were busy.

“No. You decided that we had to break up and haven’t listened to a word I’ve tried to say.”

You grit your teeth as you continued to wipe down the counter. You were pretty sure you gave him several reasons why you didn’t want to be with him anymore – namely that he treated you like some glorified slave.

“You’re still here?” Hwasa raised her brow at you as she walked back behind the counter and pointedly stared at Mark. “Can you seriously not take a hint?”

“This is none of your business, Hwasa.”

“You are scaring off my customers, which makes it my business. She’s made it clear that she doesn’t want to be with you, so why don’t you listen to her for once and fuck off.”

Mark stared at Hwasa, eyes boring into her intensely. Then, without another word, he left. The sound of the bell ringing filled the shop, only the murmur of the radio and the few patrons who weren’t scared off by Mark left to fill the silence.

“I have changed my mind about him. He’s a dick.” Hwasa shook her head as she watched Mark storm away from the shop.

“Finally.” You rolled your eyes dramatically with a giggle.

“How can a bloke come across so nice and then be an absolute twat?”

“Maybe you should ask Mark.” You leant against the counter, watching as Hwasa walked over to the radio.

“If I ever have to talk to that child again, it will be too soon.” She played with the dial as she searched for a station. Hwasa moved through the stations quickly, only waiting long enough to hear what music was playing before skipping to the next. You turned to clean the counter, mind already tuning out the sound until-

“Now, Yoongi-” a voice crooned out before Hwasa was onto the next station.

You dropped the rag you were using and turned to Hwasa. “Wait, go back!”

Hwasa looked at you for a second, contemplating your words, before reluctantly dialling the station backwards.

“It’s an impressive feat, I must say. To write about such heartbreak with such love,” the female radio presenter was saying.

“I don’t know if I would describe it as love,” The male presenter said with a chuckle. “Isn’t the whole point of the song to tell this girl that the last time you saw her was your lightning strike, your realisation that it was over. That you weren’t in love with her?”

“Not at all. Seeing her again… It’s like we were never apart. Lightning coursed through my body and told me that I made a mistake. Truly, I did. I thought I was doing her a favour, breaking it off. I thought I was holding her back. That she was holding me back… But she made me better.”

“Wow, Yoongi. That’s quite the sentiment. What would you say if she was here, right now?” The female presenter asked.

“I… I would probably tell her how stupid I am. But none of that matters now. She’s moved on. I can’t go back to the past and change things. I just have to move on.”

Hwasa placed a hand on your arm, jolting you back to reality. You stared at her blankly as Yoongi and the two presenters continued to talk on the radio behind you. You couldn’t take in a word they were saying, only what he had said.

He publicly admitted he was - had - dated someone. Live on air. Either he had just admitted something he shouldn’t have and thus would be in massive trouble with the company or...

She’s moved on.

Your heart squeezed in your chest.

“Hey.” Hwasa tapped your arm, mouth open as if to continue her sentence but quickly closed when the radio presenter suddenly announced over the opening chords-

“And now, the song that we know will be at the top of the charts in no time, Lightning by Min Yoongi.”

The opening chords were slow; sweetly interlocked together on the piano. Yoongi’s deep sultry voice began to lazily rap. Slowly it built until a loud clap of thunder and silence filled the room for a beat, Yoongi’s breath consuming the airwaves. Then the music kicked back in; faster and more urgent than before and Yoongi’s rapping about you.

You.

His panic over watching you leave.

His pain at not calling you, not telling you he didn’t want you to leave.

And his love.

For you.

By the time the song ends, and the presenters were speaking and thanking Yoongi for his time, you had tears in your eyes.

Hwasa pulled you into a hug, murmuring, ‘I know’ as she rubbed your back.

Because there it was, clear as day. Yoongi had wanted you; he just couldn’t find the words. But now he was prepared to let you go, let a better man have you.

Except there was no better man.

You only wanted Yoongi.

Yoongi all but collapsed as he sat down in the car. He didn’t know how to feel anymore. He just felt empty.

He didn’t want to admit it to himself, but he had dreamt of you calling him after the song played. Of seeing your face flash once more on his phone screen; hearing your voice as you told him what you loved about the song.

But his phone remained quiet in his pocket.

Namjoon had warned him of this. Of letting himself hope.

After he played the song for Namjoon, after the initial excitement had waned, Namjoon had turned to Yoongi with a sombre expression.

“Yoongi hyung,” Namjoon said softly as he placed a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder. “Are you sure you’re really ready to let her go?”

“Of course.”

Namjoon frowned. “Are you sure about that?”

“Namjoon, what are you trying to say? Just say it already.”

“I don’t think you’re as ready to let her go as you think you are.” He leant back in his seat. “I just don’t want you to get your hopes up.”

Yoongi had promised him that he expected nothing from you, but clearly, he had been lying.

By the time the car returned him to the dorm, Yoongi had schooled his features to remain stoic. He knew he needed to hide his disappointment from the rest of his group, especially as he had overheard Jimin’s plans to surprise him upon his return. He didn’t feel like celebrating, but he also didn’t want to explain why he had a sudden desire to retreat to his bed and not come out for a few days.

He opened the door slowly, expecting Taehyung or Jungkook to blast him with confetti the moment he stepped through the door.

He was met with silence.

“Hello?” Yoongi called out as he took off his shoes. He was shrugging off his jacket when you appeared from the door.

“Hi.”

Yoongi froze, one arm still in his jacket. “What are you doing here?” He continued taking his jacket off, more to avoid your gaze than anything else.

“I heard you on the radio.” You tentatively stepped towards him. “It was beautiful, Yoongi.”

He heard the crack in your voice as you said his name. He wanted to tell you he didn’t mean it; he still loved you. Always had, always would. But, just like that god awful night, the words wouldn’t come to him. He stood in the entry of the dorm, unable to look at you; unable to say a word and it hit him. He was doing it again.

You laughed awkwardly. “I don’t know why I came. I just wanted to tell you that.” You made to grab your shoes, but Yoongi stepped in front of you.

“What did Mark think?”

“Mark?”

“Yeah.”

“I... don’t know…” you admitted softly. Yoongi stepped to the side, allowing you to grab your shoes.

He still refused to look at you, so you took the moment to observe his profile, noting the sharp, tense line of his jaw.

“You probably shouldn’t come here again.” Yoongi finally looked at you, searching your face for something. Anything that could help him finally get over you. “I doubt Mark would appreciate you turning up at your ex’s.” Yoongi stepped further into the dorm, all but telling you that he was done with the conversation.

It wasn’t what he wanted to say. It was a reminder to himself that you were taken. That he couldn’t just lean down and capture your lips like he so desperately wanted. So he needed to remove himself from your presence.

“We broke up.”

Yoongi stopped walking, his heart beating rapidly in his chest.

“Mark and I… I left him.” You took a shaky breath to settle your nerves. You hadn’t planned on him. Then again, you had never planned to leave him in the first place. You closed your eyes and turned towards the door. “I’m sorry for bothering you.” You opened the door and stepped out into the hall.

Yoongi was frozen as his mind raced to comprehend your words.

We broke up… I left him…

It couldn’t be a coincidence. Turning up after hearing his song, after hearing him tell the world he was still in love with you. And that he was ready to move on.

The click of the door closing brought him back to the present. He hurried to follow you.

You were halfway down the hall.

“I didn’t mean it.” He called after you. “I’m not ready to move on. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready.” He slowly made his way towards you. “I shouldn’t have let you leave. Fuck, I shouldn’t have said we should go on a break in the first place. I was just feeling… inadequate. Like you didn’t need me around.” He stopped a little bit behind you and swallowed down his fear. You needed to hear this. “When I told you the agency wouldn’t let you come on tour with us and you didn’t react, I felt like I didn’t matter to you as much as you mean to me. Because I fought for you to come on tour for… I don’t even know how long. Then I come home to break the news to you and… nothing. I thought you were going to leave me so I thought taking a break would help but…” Yoongi took a deep breath. “I have never regretted something as much as that night.”

You blinked away the tears that were forming. “Do you want to know why I didn’t react, Yoongi?” You turned to face him. “Because I was used to it. Used to coming home to an empty apartment, waking up to an empty bed. Spending weeks alone because you had some project going on that you had to work on. It was going to be hard, but I was used to it.”

“You shouldn’t be.” Yoongi shook his head. “Shit, I hadn’t…”

“Considered that?” You nodded slowly.

“Yeah. I thought about calling you every single day.”

“Why didn’t you?” You stepped forward once more. “Why didn’t you call me, Yoongi?” A tear slipped down your cheek.

“I didn’t know what to say,” he admitted softly.

“I didn’t need to hear you say anything, Yoongi. I just needed to know you cared.” Your phone chimed in your pocket. You stepped away from Yoongi. “I should go.”

You turned, but Yoongi caught your hand. “I can’t watch you walk away from me again.” His voice cracked, but he didn’t care. “I love you. Always have, always will. If you don’t feel the same way… If after everything that’s happened is too much or… or you don’t…” He closed his eyes. “Then I’ll learn to love you less. It’ll take time, but I’d try.”

“You could have said that.”

“What?”

You smiled, lacing your fingers with him. “That you love me. That would have been enough.” You leant up and placed a kiss on his lips. He relaxed in your embrace, leaning his forehead against yours when you pulled away.

“Then let me say it loud and clear.” He pulled away from you slightly and kissed your forehead. “I.” Then your cheek. “Love.” Then the other. “you.” Finally, he kissed you with some force pulling your body up against his as he deepened the embrace. You wove your fingers through his hair as you lost yourself in him, in the familiarity of it all.

Despite the time you had lost, the time you had spent apart, the feeling that flooded your body was like coming home. It was sharp and sparked through your body like lightning lighting up the night sky and you knew, in that moment, there was truly no other man in the world who could make you feel like this.

#bts #min yoongi #suga #yoongi #bts yoongi #bts suga #suga x reader #suga x you #yoongi x reader #yoongi x you #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #bts writing #bts reaction #bts imagines #bts requests

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sunsetinmyvein · 4 years ago

Text

My Foot is in the Door - Patrick Stump

Eyyyy, thanks for the request from the prompt list lovely anon! I went with a slightly different angle with the “ I’m calling to cancel our date because I’m actually in the ER right now, sorry. I mean… sure? I guess you can come down here but- okay…” context, since I’ve done it once already for Mr Healy and wanted to spice it up. Hopefully you still enjoy it. (Also, it didn’t eat the bottom half of your ask, I’m just a dumbass lol)

“Pete, I just don’t know why you set me up on this date.” Patrick huffed into the phone as he tried to find his tie. Where the fuck had he put it? When did he last even wear it..? Probably for that shitty wedding two years ago.

“Because you need to get laid, ‘trick.” His friend’s voice echoed down the line.

“I’m fine.” He grumbled as he flipped his laundry basket over. It wasn’t there either.

“It’s been ages.” Pete droned.

“Just because you need to fuck someone every three days doesn’t mean I have to.” He shot back, only to hear the bassist laugh in response. “I’m not gonna sleep with someone I’m not into. You know that, right?” He asked as he finally caught sight of the dark blue tie sticking out from one of his dresser drawers.

“You should.” He yanked hard on the tie, but it wouldn’t budge.

“That’s not how it works.” Patrick spat angrily as he pulled on the tie again.

“It is for me.” He could just hear the smugness in Pete’s voice. He didn’t want to go on this stupid fucking date. He’d done it as a favour and it had just backfired on him. The restaurant was ages away and way too fancy, he didn’t even like this girl, and now he couldn’t even get his fucking tie to look half decent.

“Pete, I swear to god-” He started as he spun around and kicked his door in frustration, only to feel pain shoot up his leg and leave him crumpled on the floor.

At the sound of the phone clattering to the floor and Patrick’s strangled cry of pain, Pete became slightly concerned. “Are you okay?” The singer heard his friend ask. His phone was only a metre away, but he felt like if he let go of his ankle he might die. Patrick also saw the sizeable hole that was now in his bedroom door.

“No. Obviously I’m fucking not!” He shouted in the direction of the receiver.

“What did you do?” Pete continued.

“Probably just broke my foot when I kicked the door because I was mad at you and my stupid tie.” He stared daggers at the piece of fabric in question as he said it, hoping that it was able to feel his wrath.

All he could hear was laughter. “You’re a dumbass.” He was going to choke on his rage any second now and just die here on the floor with a broken foot.

“I’m going to fucking smash your bass over your car if you don’t take me to the hospital.” He eventually said through gritted teeth when Pete’s laughter died down.

“Shit. I’ll be there in five.” He mumbled as he hung up the call.

“You fucking better be.”

The drive to the hospital was mostly just filled with the crackling of Pete’s shabby old radio. Patrick was in too much pain to speak. He worried that if he opened his mouth he might just scream, so he opted to keep it shut. He was also still mad at Pete for being the cause of this. But at least he’d gotten out of the date. Shit. The date. “I’d better call her and let her know not to go to the restaurant…” He muttered as he fumbled in his pocket for his phone.

“You probably should, yeah.” Pete nodded as they pulled into the carpark.

Patrick scrolled through his phone for her contact, before begrudgingly hitting the call button. She picked up after three rings, which was a shame – he had hoped he could just leave her a voicemail. “Look, I’m really sorry but I need to cancel our date.” He sighed.

“What? Why?” She asked in what sounded like frustration.

“I, uh… I think I’ve broken my foot?” He answered hesitantly.

“Oh my god!” She gasped loud enough that Patrick had to pull his phone away from his ear.

“So, it needs to be looked at-” He continued.

“Let me drive you!” She offered instantly. He could hear her shuffling around on the other end of the line.

“No, it’s fine, I’m already here-” He shook his head vehemently, even though he knew she couldn’t see it.

“I’ll meet you there. Just let me find my jacket.” She interrupted, clearly not listening to what he was saying.

He decided to just get to the point and be honest with her, “Seriously, I’d rather you didn’t-”

“I’ll see you soon!” She called out, before he heard the click of the call ending.

“I… guess?” He said in disbelief as he stared at the phone in his hand.

“Come on.” Pete said, gesturing in the direction of the hospital doors and holding a hand out to help Patrick get out of the car. Patrick slapped it away, deciding to hobble to the doors by himself.

Once he had checked in, taken a number and sat down in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs, he let out a long sigh. At least it wasn’t too busy in the waiting room at this hour. He felt far too dressed up to be here, still in his good pants and crisp shirt. But no emergency room was complete without a crying baby and a TV that was turned up slightly too loud. The jarring noises rattled around Patrick’s skull incessantly. Why couldn’t he have grabbed some headphones on his way out of the house? He let out another defeated sigh.

“You gonna tell me what’s wrong or you just gonna wallow in your angst?” Pete asked, not even looking up from his phone.

“Why did you set me up with this girl?” Patrick moped. He could’ve had a pleasant evening by himself. But no, here he was with a fractured foot and a jerk.

“Because I am older and therefore wiser than you.” He spoke in an entitled tone.

“Get fucked.” He scoffed with a roll of his eyes.

“Because she’s hot.” That sounded much more accurate.

“Then why didn’t you just take her out?” He questioned.

“I took pity on you.” Pete said as he clapped a supportive hand down on Patrick’s shoulder, which he instantly shrugged off.

“I don’t fucking need your pity, Pete.” He frowned. The notion that he required relationship help from someone like Pete was just downright offensive.

“Well, you need something to help you out. You’re doing pretty hopelessly at the moment.” He said as he tried to wrap his arm around the younger singer.

“Hey! Fuck you!” He nearly shouted, moving to grab Pete’s arm off him. But he was too fast.

“I’m doing you a favour, man.” Pete chuckled. He was about to also need to check himself into the emergency waiting list if he continued like this.

“Mr Stump?” A voice called, right as Patrick had lined up his fist with Pete’s teeth.

“Oh, that’s me.” He mumbled in surprise. “This isn’t over.” He added, glaring at his friend. Pete just flashed his shit-eating grin in response. Patrick gave him the finger.

“He can come too-” The nurse started to offer.

“No!” He cut her off instantly. “He absolutely is not coming.” He said, scrambling to get to his feet and limp over to the nurse. She eyed him in concern before taking a few steps closer to help him walk.

“Come through here.” She instructed as she motioned towards a set of double doors.

“Sure thing.” He nodded as she wrapped an arm around his waist to try and keep some of the weight off his foot. Patrick couldn’t help but feel the little nagging voice at the back of his brain informing him that the attention was nice.

“Just sit here and let’s take a look.” She said as she sat him down in a chair and began rifling through a few drawers. Patrick watched her as she tried to find whatever equipment she was looking for. She was quite pretty. That just made this all the more embarrassing. Having an attractive person deal with your stupid, anger induced injury? Awful.

“I think I might’ve broken it, or fractured it.” He started to explain as he took his hat off and ran a hand through his hair, trying to fill the awkward silence. She nodded along, listening to him elaborate on his pain.

“All right.” She finally said, having removed his swollen foot from his shoe. “Let me know if this hurts.” She said as she began to try and roll his ankle around. He took in a sharp breath, the pain was instantaneous.

“That… yep.” Patrick squeaked, trying hard not to yank his foot away. “Definitely hurts.” He nodded rapidly.

“One a scale of one to ten?” She asked as she gently put his foot back on the ground.

“Nine. Nine point five.” He said quickly, rubbing at the stubble on his chin to stop himself from crying out in pain.

“Okay.” She said, turning around to make some notes on his file. “There doesn’t seem to be any abrasions or cuts, what did you do to it?” She questioned.

“I… er… I was worked up on the phone and kicked a door too hard.” He admitted sheepishly as he pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

“Must’ve been an intense conversation you were having there, Mr Stump.” She said with an amused look.

“My friend out there set me up on a shitty date.” He said, jabbing a thumb towards the door.

“Oh? Why was it so bad?” She asked as bandaged his foot to try and keep the swelling compressed.

“The girl he set me up with is more of his type of girl than mine, and now he’s just trying to guilt trip me into going on a date with her.” He explained with a huff. As he said it, he heard her familiar shrill voice echoing in through the waiting room door. “Oh my god, that’s her.” He said, shrinking down in his chair. “Please don’t let her know I’m back here.” He pleaded. He was trying not to sound desperate, but was absolutely certain he was failing.

“You don’t want her to know you’re okay?” She asked with a confused frown.

“I really don’t want to be on this date.” He said truthfully, scratching at one of his sideburns. “I told her I was going to the ER and she just told me she’d meet me her. I tried to ask her not to but she insisted.”

“Fair enough.” She shrugged as she grabbed a set of crutches. “I’m going to send you off for an x-ray to verify exactly what you’ve done. It’s just down the…” She was about to send him back through the waiting room to go down to the x-ray clinic, but then realised he probably didn’t want to go past this date of his. And the puppy dog look he was giving her was too sweet to resist. “Let’s go the back way.” She suggested.

“Thanks.” He grinned.

After a slow and shaky trip down to the x-ray machines, the nurse left him in the technician’s capable hands. The scan took less than five minutes. But then a further ten minutes was spent by Patrick prying to know what his foot looked like. Was it broken? Fractured? Sprained? The answer of ‘I’m not the doctor, I can’t tell you’ just wasn’t good enough. Also, he’d rather not leave this nice, confined room just yet. But eventually he had to give up and go back to the waiting room. He apprehensively pushed the door open, feeling a rush of relief to see Pete sitting by himself.

“Hey, man. What did they say?” He asked as Patrick hobbled over.

“I don’t know. They have to wait for the x-ray to come back.” He said as he tried to sit down. Crutches made everything so much more difficult to manoeuvre.

“Do they think it’s broken?” He continued to question.

“I don’t know.” He said again. “Where did she go?” He asked, glancing around the waiting room.

“She went out to go get a coffee.” Pete answered. A coffee at 11pm? Geez. “Did you want me to-”

“No!” Patrick instantly shouted, earning a death stare from the receptionist at his volume. “No.” He said again, quieter.

“I’ll let her know when you’re free next?” He suggested. It looked like he was trying to contain his stupid smile.

“Please don’t.” Patrick groaned.

The bandages soothed the pain somewhat. Which was helpful considering it was another hour in the waiting room before the results of his x-ray came back. “Mr Stump, please come through.” The same nurse called out.

“Coming!” He spoke, quickly getting to his feet. Pete watched his lack of coordination with the crutches with amusement, at one point sticking his foot out just to be difficult. Patrick stomped on it with his good foot, earning a yelp out of the bassist.

“Take a seat.” The nurse said when he eventually managed to get into the room.

“Is there a reason you never say my first name?” Patrick asked as he leaned his crutches against the wall.

“What?” She asked, seemingly caught off guard.

“You keep calling me Mr Stump.” He elaborated, adjusting his glasses.

“Oh, well… it’s just procedure, I guess? We’re told to refer to patients by their surname.” She answered.

“You can call me Patrick.” He said. She looked over at him, and he suddenly felt self-conscious under her stare. “Uh, if you want, anyway.” He added with a nervous grin. She just smiled back at him.

“Looking at your x-rays, it’s not broken.” She said, bringing them up on her screen.

“Oh, that’s good.” He said, the news brightening his mood.

“You’ve just dislocated it.” She continued, pointing out the leg bone that wasn’t sitting flush with his foot like it should be on the scan.

“That’s… not good.” He said quietly. The worries started building in his head about what that meant for their gig next weekend. Would he even be able to walk by then? Let alone be on stage for an hour?

“It’s not great Patrick, no.” She laughed lightly. The way she said his name pulled him out of his spiralling. “You really did a number on yourself.” The smile on her face made his heart rate start climbing. He realised after a second that he was just staring at her like a love-sick puppy, and should probably say something.

He cleared his throat before speaking, “So, um… What do I do now?” He asked, leaning forward in his seat to get a better look at the x-ray.

“We’re going to need to move the bones back into place.” She replied. He instantly grimaced. “It won’t be as bad as you think. It’ll hurt less once it’s sorted.” She reassured him.

“I’ll take your word for it.” He nodded grimly as he pulled a hand through his hair.

“We’re going to need to take you through to one of the doctors to get them to do it.” She said as she stood up and started moving towards the doors.

“Aw, man. More walking?” He complained. “These crutches are so hard to use.” He mumbled as he got to his feet.

“Have you adjusted them?” She questioned.

“What?”

“Have you adjusted them? To be correct to your height?”

“Oh, uh… no? How do I do that?” He stared down at the large metal contraptions. After a brief moment of laughing at him, she helped him sort out the crutches to be more comfortable. Usually, he would get pretty defensive at being laughed at, but in this moment, he was just happy to have made the cute girl laugh. Maybe all the adrenalin was messing with his brain.

As they stepped out into the waiting room, the nurse nudged his shoulder. “It would seem your friend is having a better night than you are.” She said quietly.

“Huh?” He looked around the room in confusion, before spotting what she was referring to. He caught sight of Pete walking out of the hospital, with his date hanging off his arm. The bastard then had the audacity to turn around and flash Patrick a thumbs up over his shoulder. The fucker.

“I’m gonna fucking kill him.” Patrick said through gritted teeth, his knuckles turning white as he gripped his crutches.

“Wait until your foot is better first.” He heard the nurse say.

“What?” He frowned.

“Don’t wanna give him any extra advantages or you might not succeed.” She explained.

He looked at her in bewilderment for a second, before starting to laugh. “I’m liking you more and more by the minute.”

She ushered him through to the doctor’s room, leaving him sat there waiting and worrying for the next twenty-five minutes. Finally, a doctor came in to reposition his foot. They ran him through a few things that they were going to do, before just jumping right in. The pain was on a new level from anything he had felt before as the doctor forcibly moved his bones. But once it was set as it should be, it started to ebb away slightly. Once the procedure was done, the doctor relegated him back to the nurse’s office. He sat quietly, massaging his ankle slightly to try and relieve some of the ache.

“Patrick, good to see you still in one piece.” She said as she came back into the room.

He looked up at her in surprise, unable to stop himself from cracking a smile. “Good to have my foot reconnected to my leg.” He shot back.

“The doctors sorted you out, then?”

“Yeah.” He nodded as he fiddled with the hat in his hands. “They said you had some medication for me?” He added.

“Yes. I do.” She began grabbing a box out from the cupboard above her computer before handing it to him. “Only take these painkillers once a day - I’d recommend using them to sleep.” She instructed with a serious expression.

“Got it.”

“Keep your foot elevated when you can to reduce the swelling, ice it if it’s hurting too much.” She continued.

“Okay. I can do that.”

“And if you’re really struggling,” She started, handing him some paperwork. “Feel free to ask me for help.”

He looked at her in confusion, before looking down at the papers to see a number written across the top. It took him a second for the pieces to click into place. “Really?” He grinned in disbelief.

“Take care of yourself, Patrick.” She smiled sweetly.

“But if I don’t, I’ll see you more.” He pointed out.

“You can see me without injuring yourself.” She laughed, rolling her eyes at his suggestion.

“Good to know.” He felt like his heart was beating so fast it might explode.

“Terrible night a little bit better now?”

“Much.”

#Patrick Stump x Reader #Sunsetinmyvein #Sunsetinmyvein prompts #Sunsetinmyvein requests

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writing-of-a-british-bitch · 4 years ago

Text

Blame Me- Chapter 3

Fandom: The Walking Dead

Specified gender: Female

Word Count: 5.7K

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x reader,

TW: Cannibalism (thanks Terminus), reference to past major character death, detailed gore, canon typical violence, canon divergence, reference to past child death, angry Daryl (if that counts), Daryl being mean about religion( IG?)

Genre: Horror ig?

Series: Blame Me

Requests: CLOSED

Masterlist

A/N: I will warn you, I kind of got carried away with Chapter 4, so get ready for that tomorrow. This one felt a little rushed, but the ending is worth it (I hope!) Enjoy!

For once, Daryl was cursing himself for being right. Terminus had been too fucking good to be true. Ask too many questions, and apparently, you get eaten. He was lined up, with Glenn, Bob and Rick, and apparently, he was the only one fighting against them. They just sat there and let them tie them up for fucks sake. He couldn't die, not like this. He wouldn't die just to be someones damn meal. Daryl got shoved in front of a trough-like bowl that stretched before the other men who were on either side of him. One look from Rick and Glenn made him pause, and he glared right back, breathing heavily, but he stopped fighting. The room was deadly still as two people dressed in butchers outfit came in, and he went cold. Fuck. They walked to the opposite end, grabbing the hair of a blonde guy at the end and one smacked him with a baseball bat. Once he was out, the other slit his throat, and immediately panic arose, and Glenn started panicking beside him. This continued down the line until it got to Glenn, and Daryl felt the dread building and building in his stomach, watching the blood run through the trough. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Glenn's hair got pulled back, and Daryl could tell the younger man was already apologising to Maggie in his head. The first butcher raised the bat above his head but was stopped when the leader, Gareth walked through.

"Hey, guys, what were your shot counts?" He asked, looking up from the clipboard in his hand. The first guy answered almost instantly with "38" but the guy with the knife hesitated "Hey! Your shot count"

"Crap, man, I'm sorry. It was my first roundup," He sighed. Daryl had to resist making a face of disgust. How could they discuss these things so casually as if they weren't killing people for food right in front of them?

"After you're done here, go back to your point and count the shells. Kaylee won't be gathering them until tomorrow. Oh, and also, did you both register your reports on that girl who tried to escape the other day?" Gareth questioned, raising an eyebrow. Rick narrowed his eyes at the man, while Bob started wriggling, and making small noises to get his attention. Both butchers gave responses of yes simultaneously "Great."

"What happened to her?" One asked, but Daryl couldn't determine which. Didn't fucking care at this point.

"Kaylee's got her. She's a fighter, I'll give her that. She'll break eventually. Don't worry about it," Gareth shrugged.

God these guys really were another level of asshole. If eating people didn't qualify that enough.

"Hey, let me talk to you for a minute! Let me talk to you for a minute. Let me talk to you for a minute!"Bob exclaimed, muffled through the gag. What the hell was he doing? Gareth turned back with an exasperated sigh, crouching down in front of him and yanking the gag out.

"What?"

"Don't do this. We can fix this," Bob tried to reason.

"No, you can't," Gareth rolled his eyes and moved to put the gag back in Bob's mouth.

"You don't have to do this. We told you there's a way out of all this. You just have to take a chance. We have a man who knows how to stop it. He has a cure. We just have to get him to Washington. You don't have to do this, man. We can put the world back to how it was," Now he was being stupid. Gareth was clearly a psychopath, there was no reasoning with a man like him. Daryl was, however, becoming increasingly aware of how long the guy at the end had been dead. He'd turn soon if they didn't deal with it.

"Can't go back, Bob," Gareth put the gag back in. Bob's eyes widened as he kept begging.

"We can! You don't have to do this!" Gareth rolled his eyes, turning to look at Rick instead. Daryl saw him stiffen, eyes hardening as he looked to the man who threatened his son. Gareth pulled the gag out and Rick held back a snarl, clutching the chunk of wood tighter

"We saw you go into the woods with a bag and come out without it. Had to pull my spotters back before we could go look for it. What was in it? You hid it, right? In case things went bad? Smart. Still, we'll find it. But it's too dangerous to go out there right now.," He suddenly grabbed Bob by the back of the neck and held a knife to his eye., but Rick didn't say anything. "What was in it? I'm curious. And it was a big bag. You really gonna let me do this?

"Well, let me take you out there I'll show you," Daryl watched the exchange carefully. Rick had started to go full Shane recently, and Gareth was messing with the wrong fucking guy.

"Not gonna happen. This might," Gareth moved the knife closer to Bob's eye, and he could see him trying not to flinch.

"There's guns in it. AK-47. .44 Magnum. Automatic weapons. Nightscope. There's a compound bow and a machete with a red handle. That's what I'm gonna use to kill you," Rick growled, glaring. The sharpened piece of wood he was holding was starting to make his hand bleed he was holding it so tightly.

Gareth only laughed, putting the gag back in "Thanks," He stood up and began walking back, calling to the two butchers "You have two hours to get them on the driers. I'm gonna go back to public face. Now's the time we can get messy, but we need to dial it all in by sundown."

The butchers nodded, pulling their goggles and gloves back on, but just when they were about to get back to work, they heard gunshots ring out from outside. Gareth looked at the window puzzled before pulling the radio from his side. Glenn's breathing was getting rapid as the panic built back up. One of the butchers raised the bat again slowly.

"Hey, Chuck?" Another gunshot sounded, stopping the butcher. Daryl looked around, meeting Rick's gaze briefly before a loud explosion shook the ground, knocking them to the floor, so Daryl was on the back of Glenn's legs. He could see black smoke through the window, and he already knew that there would be a herd of walkers following through.

"Hey, what the hell was that? Do you copy?"Someone on the radio asked, sounding slightly scared.

"You stay here," Gareth commanded, beginning to walk out.

"Gareth these guys aren't going anywhere-"

"Stay here until I know what's happening!" Gareth screamed, running out. The butchers exchanged a frustrated look, but stayed put, rising from the ground. Daryl and Glenn had started rubbing their wrists together hoping to break the zip ties holding them down, and Glenn let out a noise of pain.

"So we just sit here?" Knife guy asked

"Got a job to do," the Baseball guy replied, nonchalantly. They stood there for a minute, not even noticing Daryl and Glenns escape attempt, but the knife guy started pacing as they heard more and more gunshots. They started bickering. Daryl didn't even fucking care anymore. He had to get out of these restraints and get his family out of this shit hole. But apparently, while the butchers had failed to notice him, he'd failed to notice Rick, as he came behind one of them and stabbed him in the temple, then moved and stabbed the other in the neck. Except he stabbed the guy in the neck over and over and over, showing that Rick style homicidal rage, that stopped Daryl in his tracks. Rick rushed over and used the stake to tear his and Glenn's bindings, eyes frantic. Daryl stood up, tugging the gag from his mouth in relief.

"Sounds like a damn war," He huffed, picking up one of the knives from the table while Rick cut Bob free.

"What the hell are these people?" Bob asked, scrambling to his feet.

"They ain't people," Daryl remarked, and for a split second, his mind flickered to his girl. That was something she'd say. Maybe she'd rubbed off on him. But he couldn't think about that right now. He had to get out. Had to get them out. Bob went to stab one of the butchers in the head but Rick stopped him immediately.

"Don't. Let him turn."

The four men made their way out of the room, further into the slaughterhouse. They entered a room, where there were bodies hung up like animals, dried and headless. Daryl had never been someone with a weak stomach. Hell, all his years of hunting and the apocalypse had stopped that. But seeing the bodies made his stomach churn in disgust. Rick clearly had the same thought in mind.

"You cross any of these people, you kill them. Don't hesitate," He walked further in the room, Daryl following behind. He tucked the machete into his belt and picked up another knife and Rick looked over to him. "They won't."

Gunfire kept roaring from outside, and Daryl used his elbow to break off a chunk of metal from a machine. He didn't even want to know what it did. They reached the door and saw walkers crowded around a container, where some people were screaming for help inside, possibly some of Terminus' other hostages.

"If we run, we can get by them. They're distracted," Rick stated but Glenn shook his head.

"We got to let those people out. That's still who we are. It's got to be," Glenn replied, determined. Daryl didn't take his eyes off the walkers, knife out and ready to kill if he had to. There was a short pause, and Rick nodded, opening the door. All the noise from outside rose to an insane volume and it almost made Daryl's ears ache as he rushed out first, stabbing walkers, the rest of his boys right behind. It turned out the guy in the container was not only a member of Terminus but also absolutely batshit. They didn't have to worry about him long though - a walker took quick care of him, tearing out the muscles of his shoulder, as the guy screamed.

The place was overrun. There were walkers everywhere, and they weren't entirely sure how they were going to get out of this one. Daryl was more focused on keeping Glenn in place so he didn't do anything rash to get back to Maggie. He couldn't blame him. If (Y/N) were in that container still, he'd do something stupid to get back to her. Rick suddenly sprinted off, ignoring the groups' calls of his name. They watched as some of Terminus shot down a bunch of walkers, Rick crouched out of view behind a car. Daryl let out an annoyed growl. The damn fool was gonna get himself killed doing this. So, he followed after him, watching his back as Rick killed one of the Terminus men and stole his gun, using it to shoot walkers and Terminus alike. The walkers were helping to take out some of Terminus, but it was getting too full, and even Rick could see they wouldn't be able to get past all the walkers. He and Daryl ran back to Bob and Glenn, who looked pissed off that he'd run off again.

"We're gonna have to double back."

They made it back to the container their family was in and they pried the doors open. Daryl, Glenn and Bob were watching Rick's back as he instructed everyone, Abraham, Sasha, Michonne, Carl, Tara, Rosita, Eugene and Maggie, out of the box. But the annoying bastards just kept coming and coming. They were running out of time. Out of the corner of his eye, Glenn saw someone fighting a ginger woman. One of Terminus. The other woman was covered in walker's guts, using the disguising trick but he could see (H/C) hair. But he didn't think anything of it. She was probably just another hostage who was taking advantage of the situation. He couldn't worry about her now, he had to worry about his family. Daryl saw Carl and Rick talking for a split second before the chaos resumed, and they were fighting their way out, guts and blood spilling everywhere.

Anywhere you looked, there was a walker or a Terminus person. Daryl was leading, keeping his people safe from the front, and Rick was a the back. They were storming ahead, so so close to the fence. But Rick and Carl were slowing, from exhaustion and panic. Rick heard an awful yell from his son and spun around to see a walker gripping his sleeve and trying to pull his arm to its mouth. Rick went to rush forward, but the walker was suddenly dead, crumbling to the ground. Carls fearful eyes looked over and saw a woman, covered in guts, (H/C) sticking to her face and (E/C) eyes looking at him almost tenderly. Rick ran to his son, and pulled him away, staring the woman down. But she only narrowed her eyes and yelled "Go!" before disappearing into the crowd of walkers. Within seconds, she was gone. They didn't have time to dwell on it now. Gareth and the few members of Terminus that remained started shooting at them from the rooftop. They rushed through the rest of the walkers, ducking bullets and stabbing walkers and met their group at the fence. Daryl climbed over first, then Abraham lifted Eugene over, then Carl and the rest of the group, leaving himself for last.

When they were back at the bag, Daryl crouched down, taking a deep breath. Shit, that was way too close. They'd gotten lucky. Whoever had caused an explosion had saved their damn lives. And he didn't even know who it was. Maybe one of the idiots at Terminus had fucked something up and caused it. Or maybe someone was looking out for them. Hell if he knew. Hell if he cared anymore. His family was safe and that's all the mattered now. Rick started digging out the guns, mumbling out a plan as the rest of the group caught their breath, letting what just happened finally sink in. That is until Rick started talking about back to Terminus. They'd barely gotten out the first time! Some of the group started arguing back, but Daryl didn't give a shit anymore. He just leant against a tree, watching, listening.

A rustle of branches made him turn around and he froze, as the rest of the group did. They stared wide-eyed as Carol came out of the trees. They watched in amazement as Daryl sprinted over and dragged her into a tight hug, grasping onto her desperately and lifting her off her feet. She laughed lightly, grinning when he pulled back. Holy shit. She was alive. She was alive. She'd saved them. If anyone saw the tears running down his cheeks, no one said anything.

Daryl's feet were aching. The roads seemed to stretch on for miles. But the pain in his feet was nothing compared to the anger and undealt with grief. The losses were building up and up and he didn't know how much more he could take. Half the camp, Sophia, Dale, Shane (but no one really missed him), Patricia and Jimmy (though admittedly he didn't know them that well), Lori, T-Dog, Merle, Andrea, almost everyone who'd come to stay at the prison, Hershel, Bob, Tyreese... Beth. The only thing he was holding out hope for was his girl. Her ma lived in South Carolina, and with them being en route to Washington, he had to pray that maybe she made her way up there. Carl, Little Ass-Kicker and the hope of his girl were the only things keeping him going.

He'd started losing hope in his girl. Beth had died, and he'd been right fucking there. He was a hundred and more miles away from (Y/N). Now, she was strong, but he doubted she could live in a world like this. It'd destroy her. While he wanted to hold out hope and go looking for her, where would he even start? She could be anywhere by now, and there's no guarantee he'd even find her. An awful part of him wished she was dead. A disgusting, horrifying part of him, deep deep down, hoped she was dead so she didn't have to live a life like this. Didn't have to suffer like this. Deep down, Daryl knew she would hate the person he'd become. Probably hate him for what happened to Merle, too. He couldn't face that. He couldn't. Carol could see the way his eyes had drained. She could see what was happening. She was exhausted and hungry, but she wasn't blind.

She'd been hovering. Watching over him like a damn mother hen. He was getting sick and fucking tired of her constant gaze. He knew she only wanted what was best but god if he wasn't getting frustrated. Daryl could practically hear his girl's voice in his head, lecturing him about not being so cold to her, since Carol had done everything to protect him, and was his best friend. He snorted quietly at the thought of his girl standing there lecturing him, and being worried more about him and Carol than finding supplies. Sounded like her.

It was quiet now. No one spoke unless they had to. They were too weak. They hadn't had proper food in months, living off the little amount of food Daryl could hunt down, and the water was so scarce, some people were starting to get dizzy. Most of the food and water went to Judith and Carl now anyway. Everyone was hoping. Some, for the few that still believed in that shit, were even praying that we'd get some rain. But apparently, someone had seen them first and left them some water. Daryl and Rick eyed it suspiciously. Nowadays you could never be too careful. Abraham was still angry, but that wasn't anything new. That man was filled with more rage than anyone Daryl had ever met, except perhaps Merle. Shit, he missed that son of a bitch. Abraham was so angry that he smacked the bottle out of Eugene's hands when he went to take a sip. The atmosphere bristled, and Daryl could already tell an argument was about to start, and he shook his head, readjusting the bag and his crossbow. But it was all cut short when there were a few claps of thunder. Everyone looked up, hopeful glances being exchanged when the skies opened, and rain began pouring. Tara and Rosita started laughing, lying down on the floor, and some people opened their mouths to drink it before Rick ordered people to get out any bottles they had and filling them with the water. Daryl couldn't smile. He couldn't find enjoyment in it, and by the looks of it, neither could Sasha or Maggie. Every day it got harder or harder to meet her eyes. There was no blame on him, so he had no reason for guilt, but he couldn't help it. And it was eating away at him. Had been for the past three weeks.

The group were sat around a tiny fire, lightning flashing every so often and illuminating the room. Maggie was laying alone on the opposite end of the barn, and Carl was curled up behind Rick, clutching Judith to his chest. Carol walked over and plopped herself next to Daryl. Glenn was sat on his other side, engaging in an entirely different conversation. Daryl gave her a glance. She was staring at him, eyes narrowed like she was trying to read his mind, and it was starting to freak him out.

"You can't give up on her," Carol muttered, after a long moment of her staring him down. He scoffed, looking away. The hell did she know anyway. "You haven't given up yet, why give up now?"

"It's been nearly two years Carol. She's probably dead by now," He grumbled, watching the glint of his ring in the light of the fire. She shoved him lightly, her eyes moving to a glare.

"Don't talk like that," She snapped, quietly. Daryl kept his eyes on his ring, but he could feel the irritation starting to radiate off her. "You still wear your ring. You still carry that recorder. You've nearly broken a man's arm to get it back for god's sake. You can't give up on her. I won't let you."

For some reason, that got under his skin, and he could feel anger pouring in. It bubbled and boiled and his cold stare fixed on her so suddenly that Carol almost jumped.

"The hell ya gonna do to stop me?" He snarled. She didn't know shit about (Y/N) who the fuck was she to talk about his girl "You've never even met her. Ya don't know what she's like."

"No, I don't, but I know how much you love her. How much you're relying on her. And I can see how guilty you feel about Beth," Daryl was glaring now, and Carol understood she was walking into dangerous territory. "It wasn't your fault. There was nothing you could have done. But you can't start separating yourself from us, from (Y/N). You'll get yourself killed."

"What do you care? I ain't your responsibility," He growled before picking up his crossbow before walking to a corner of the barn. Carol watched him leave and made no move to stop him. Glenn gave her an alarmed look, only having heard the tail end of the conversation. Who the hell was (Y/N)? Carol shook her head, telling him not to push it and he reluctantly looked back to the others, who were still deep in conversation. She then noticed the little recorder where Daryl had been sitting. It had a few chips, and it was dirty as hell, but Daryl had gone through hell to keep it safe. Carol picked it up and spun it in her hands, before opening Daryl's bag, wrapping it in a bit of cloth and tucking it away.

How they'd managed to convince Rick, he had no idea. Though, in honesty, Daryl thought he would have jumped at the opportunity to be somewhere where Carl and Judith would be safe. But after Terminus, he couldn't blame the man for being sceptical. This guy, Aaron, there was something off about him. He couldn't put his finger on what. Either way, part of him was relieved to be out of that damn barn. Stunk of horse shit. But getting holed up in a car service place tucked into a wall with a guy with a broken ankle, wasn't exactly that much better. Daryl's family was safe. Rick's family was safe. That's what mattered. When dawn rolled around, he was startled to find himself actually hoping for this place to work. They didn't have many other choices if it didn't. They couldn't have another Terminus situation. They were all piled into the small RV and an even smaller car, and it was definitely too close quarters for Daryl to be comfortable. As usual, it went to shit when the battery went flat. Glenn was quick to use the skills that Dale had taught him to fix it up, but Daryl had taken refuge on the roof, looking out for walkers. He could feel Carol and Glenn's eyes on his back. He'd much prefer it if that could just fuck off rather than giving those annoying ass pity looks.

When they pulled up, they heard a noise they hadn't heard in a long time. Children laughing. It felt almost alien to them, and maybe this place could work out. There were no kids at Terminus. Barely any at Woodbury. If kids were having fun here, maybe they had a chance. Collectively, the group sucked in a breath as the gate started to pull back. When it opened, a ton of pristine houses were revealed down long roads, children running in the street. Aaron helped Eric limp inside and someone took him and started leading him off, presumably to the infirmary. A bristle in the bushes made the group snap over, and Daryl didn't hesitate on pressing the trigger and picking up the possum, presenting it to the man behind the gate.

"We brought dinner!"He declared, and he heard some of the group stifle chuckles and smiles. The man behind the gate looked at them warily.

"It's okay, Nicholas," Aaron reassured, placing his hand out "C'mon in guys."

Gradually, the group started wandering in, Glenn and Daryl in the lead, as Rick held Judith tightly.

"Before we take this any further, I need you all the hand over your weapons," Nicholas stated, eyeing Daryl carefully, who still held the possums tail "Stay, you hand them over."

"We don't know if we want to stay," Rick responded instantly, somehow still looking threatening even with a baby at his hip "If we were gonna use them, we would have started already."

"Let them talk to Deanna, first," Aaron turned his head to Nicholas but was turned back by Abraham, who had his shoulders squared.

"Who's Deanna?"

"She knows everything you wanna know about this place. Rick, why don't you start?" Aaron advised, and Rick tilted his head. Daryl observed him, noticing the suspicion behind his eyes. Rick turned around at the sound of a walker snarling and signalled Sasha to take care of it. Headshot. Daryl tried to hide his smirk and the astounded look on Nicholas' face. Guy seemed like a jackass. He wanted to keep his eye on him.

The group were forced to sit outside on someone's porch (a house! what the fuck) while Rick was lead inside by a short, blonde-haired woman. She seemed innocent but she was hiding something. Daryl and Michonne could see it. In the way she held herself, the way she talked, the way she looked at them. When Rick came out about fifteen minutes later, Daryl was next to go in. He was still holding the possum, crossbow on his back as he was lead into the living room. It was nice. Untouched, as if the world hadn't ended outside the gates. He hadn't been in somewhere like this since before the apocalypse. Since (Y/N). He kept messing with random shit he could find. Pacing, restlessly. Deanna just sat on the couch opposite, her eyes following where he went. Acting like a damn hawk. She already pissed him off, and she hadn't even done anything. There was a video camera set up, recording everything. He had to thank Carol later for putting his back in his bag.

"You're welcome to sit, Daryl. I won't bite," Deanna finally said, and he looked up at her through long greasy hair, frowning.

"Yeah, I'm alrigh'" He replied quietly, turning to look at the bookshelf behind him. He didn't really know what he was doing, he just didn't want to have this awkward conversation and was trying to avoid it as long as possible.

"Daryl, do you want to be here?"She questioned, a touch of impatience in her voice but Daryl still didn't look at her.

"The boy and the baby. They deserve a roof. I guess," He answered, turning his ring with his thumb as it dangled by his side. Apparently, she didn't miss the motion.

"You're married?"

"Does it matter?" He shot back, voice becoming icy and there was a glimmer of amusement in her eyes.

"You'd be surprised," Deana smiled slightly and he glared back at her, his suspicion only raising further.

"The hell does that mean?" Daryl challenged, getting closer. She shook her head, smile dropping, before standing up and moving to turn the video recorder off.

"You're free to go."

"You okay?" Carl asked, making Daryl jump a little as he appeared at his side. Daryl knocked the brim of his hat, making Carl chuckle.

"That woman asks some weird questions," Was his reply, before he sat down, waiting for the others to finish their 'interviews'.

Rick looked between the two houses in amazement. He and Carl had left after Carl had finished talking, trusting Glenn and Maggie to look after his daughter. Aaron has whisked the pair away presenting them with the two houses they were giving the large group. He'd since walked away, walking down the road towards his house to look for Eric. Rick looked at his son, who had a grin on his face at the promise of being in a house again. Carl looked out after Aaron. A woman, maybe a little younger than Rick rushed out as Aaron neared, and wrapped her arms around him. Even from the distance, he could see the relief on her face and Aaron laughed lightly before leading her back inside. He was sure he'd find out who that was later.

Rick had insisted on staying in one house for the time being, just for safety, but Daryl wasn't complaining. He'd rather his family be together if they couldn't have their weapons. He felt almost naked without his crossbow. And he'd made very good work of pretending not to see Carl's knife. Smart kid. Daryl was sat next to Little Ass Kickers crib, peering over it protectively as Michonne came back through from the bathroom. She and Rick exchanged a hushed conversation when a knock at the door sounded, and Deanna walked in. She started talking but paused when she saw everyone huddled together rather than being separated. She gave some bullshit speech on family and how amazing it was, and Daryl rolled his eyes. He couldn't help it.

"Everybody said you gave them jobs," Rick said, but it sounded more like a question and Deana made a hum of agreement.

"It's part of this place. Looks like the Communists won after all," God if someone didn't put a bolt through her brain soon Daryl swore to whatever was up there he would. Rick gave a polite smile but it was strained.

"Well, you didn't give me one," He stated

"I have. I just haven't told you yet. Same with Michonne. I'm closing in on something for Sasha. And I'm just trying to figure Mr Dixon out, but I will," Daryl scoffed at that. Yeah, it took his group two years and they still haven't. Good luck with that. Deanna gave Daryl a smile, but it felt condescending. She looked back up at Rick "You look good."

And she was gone.

The group took off the next morning, going to explore, but Daryl stayed on the porch. Rick exited, raising his eyebrows at the redneck.

"They said explore. Let's explore," He almost commanded but he was smiling. First time in a long time.

"Naw, I'll stay," Daryl said, shifting. Deanna had dropped by earlier this morning and handed him his crossbow. He was still extremely confused as to why but he sure as hell wasn't going to complain about it. Rick sighed, closing the door behind him.

"C'mon brother. Just come with us for a few minutes. Then you can come back here and brood all you like. Just pretend for a few minutes," Rick teased. Daryl scowled but Rick could see the playfulness in his eyes. It was nice, seeing Daryl slightly more at ease even if he was struggling to settle.

There was a long pause before Daryl gave a grunt of agreement, grudgingly picking up his crossbow and shoving it on his back. The pair jogged to catch up with the others, soon falling into the crowd of their family. They saw Aaron coming out of his house and Maggie raised a hand in a small greeting. He stepped over and the group started chatting. Daryl could tell the recruiter was hoping to clear the water a little bit. He didn't seem like a bad guy but Daryl couldn't let his guard down. But then someone followed out of Aaron's house, walking out onto the road and looking over to the family with a gleeful smile. Carl waved at her, recognising her from yesterday and she waved back. But the smile dropped, and Daryl froze in place like a statue. Carol noticed how stiff he'd gone beside her and followed his eyes and she froze too. A small smile climbed onto her lips. He couldn't breathe. He could hardly believe what he was seeing. He had to be dreaming. This couldn't be real.

"Daryl?"

But it was, she was right there. (H/C) hair blowing in the slight breeze and her eyes sparkling with building tears. Holy shit.

(Y/N).

His (Y/N).

Carol watched as the crossbow fell from his shoulder and Daryl shoved past his group and sprinted. He didn't think he'd moved so fast in his whole damn life because he blinked and all of a sudden, she was stood right before her. She stood there, taking him in. He couldn't breathe. She was there. She was right there. And he lunged for her, pulling her into him tightly, and placing a hand on the back of her head protectively. He could feel her fingers digging into his skin through his jacket, and he knew he couldn't let her go even if he wanted to. She was alive. She was here! Daryl wasn't a crier, that was for sure, but hell, he couldn't stop the relieved sobs he was letting out into her neck. She was whispering to him, though a trembling voice, but he couldn't hear what she was saying. He just felt her, her breath on his neck, his fingers on his back, her hair tickling his nose, her tears on his chest.

"Holy shit, "Was all he could get out, and (Y/N) let out a weepy laugh, pulling back just enough so she could see his face. Her hands moved to hold his face, running her thumbs over his cheeks.

"If you haven't brushed your teeth, I am going to kill you, Dixon," she grinned, before pulling him into a hard kiss. He held onto her, even as the outside world started coming back to him. As he heard the confused voices of his family and Aaron. As he heard the joyful, but the slightly teary voice of Carol.

He just held onto her.

TAGS: OPEN

Tags (for this series): @graniairish @fuseburner @gloomystorm @bxxbxy @browneyes528 @hoemadegrace

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wiypt-writes · 4 years ago

Text

Stark Spangled Banner

Ch 8: Old Friends, Not So New Tricks

Summary: When a familiar face turns up asking for Katie’s expertise, she finds herself confronted by another familiar face, this one being one she would rather never have had to see again.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Warnings: Language! Blood and SPOILERS if you haven’t seen Agents Of SHIELD….

A/N: Once again huge thanks to @angrybirdcr for her edit here, and the new banner for the next couple of sections of the story as we head forward through the next few parts of SSB...

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Chapter 7

O/S: Phobias

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

November 2013

There’s a fine line between success and failure. And that last mission had well and truly teetered its way along the edge. The team had been split up after a catastrophic coms failure leaving Katie and Evans badly compromised. They had just about got the situation under control after some quick thinking from Katie and very sharp shooting from Evans, when Steve had broken every protocol in place and run head first into a gun fire to get them out, putting himself in danger.

And Katie was livid at him.

“We had it under control!” she said, her voice raised as she stormed through the corridor away from the hangar, people turning to look. They’d been arguing about it all the way home.

“Yeah, well, it didn’t look like it from where I was standing!”

“Damned it Steve!” She spun to face him. “You weren’t standing anywhere, you were running, head first into the crossfire without even thinking about what was going on!”

“The last thing I heard was that you were surrounded-”

“This is EXACTLY what I don’t want you to do!” Katie groaned as she ran her hands over her face “Run in there without a second thought for your own damned safety or anyone else’s.”

“What do you mean anyone else?” Steve’s nostrils flared.

“You left Rumlow and Rollins completely uncovered,” Katie shook her head, “to come and save me. I’m not a fucking princess that needs rescuing Steve!”

“Don’t talk to me like that!” Steve’s voice was loud, displaying the anger he was feeling inside at her attitude.

“I’ll talk to you how I want!” She snapped back. “You know everyone gossips enough about us as it is and we’re almost seven months down the fucking line…”

“You think I don’t know that?”

“…and yet you STILL give them fuel!” She threw her hands out to the side, bringing them back down to her combat outfit clad sides with a slap. “Oh look at Nova, needs her Super Soldier Boyfriend to bail her out!”

“For the last time…” Steve hissed between his teeth, but Katie completely ignored him.

“If you can’t remain objective when we work together then maybe we shouldn’t be on the same team.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t if that’s how you feel!” He practically snarled, as he took a deep breath, squaring his shoulders back as his hands dropped to his belt buckle, eyes blazing.

“Glad we understand one another.” Katie spat back, before turning on her heel and heading towards the armoury to change, ignoring his shouts.

****

After debrief, for the first time in ages Steve left work alone. He was in a foul mood, and practically wrenched his apartment door off its hinges. In part he was pissed at Katie’s attitude, but in others his anger was directed at himself because deep down he knew she was right. He’d utterly lost it when he’d heard she was in trouble and hadn’t been able to do anything else but rush in there to help get them out. It was ridiculous, she was a trained agent with a shot on her like you wouldn’t believe, and the amount of times they’d been in bad situations before…but something today, something about the way she’d sounded on the radio had gotten to him and he’d abandoned all thoughts of professionalism and gone after his girl.

Sighing he threw his keys down on the kitchen side and grabbed a beer from the fridge before making his way into the living room, toeing off his boots as he want. He dropped onto the sofa and let out a loud moan of frustration, his head lolling back against the cushions. He hated that they’d rowed, this was the first big argument they’d actually had. Sure they quibbled about small things, the fact he made her sleep on the right hand side of the bed at his because it was furthest away from the door (just in case anyone got in), the way he was a bit of a neat freak and when she did stay for more than a night his apartment looked like a whirlwind had been through it (Ok, he didn’t actually mind that so much in truth), the way she tried on every fucking outfit she owned before they went out (maybe not every outfit, but close enough…), the way he often went for a run first thing in the morning and she’d get pissed he wasn’t there when she woke up because…well, because….but all that was stuff he adored. The normal part of being with someone you were comfortable sharing your life with.

As he took a pull from his bottle his eyes rolled to the right and fell on the large photo frame on his wall. It was one she had made him for his birthday.

“Open the big one first…” She instructed, nodding to the gifts that were piled on his sofa.

He did as he was told without saying a word, picking it up and resting it on his lap. It felt like a photo frame. As he peeled back the wrapping paper he realised that’s exactly what it was. It was large with glossy pine edges to match the furniture in his apartment and filled with photos of him all from his life before the ice and his eyes grew large as he took in the faces that looked back up at him. There was a photo of him and Bucky as kids, another as teenagers, then one of them in the army- the one of them laughing that Katie had said she loved. His eyes began to mist over as he saw a few shots of his parents at their wedding in Ireland, on the steps of their tenement building at Brooklyn, one of him and his mom when he was a small boy, then he spotted one of him and Howard along with various shots of him with the Howling Commandos and finally one of him, Colonel Chester Phillips and Peggy. And at the bottom of the frame, on a silver plaque was engraved a quote from the Wizard of Oz- ”A heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others.”

“I thought it was a shame to just keep them in a box.” Katie said gently as she sat next to him. “I wanted you to see them every day and remember you meant as much to them as they did or do to you.”

His fingers trailed over the various faces in the frame as the memories flooded his brain and he felt a lump in his throat at the wave of nostalgia crossing over him, and also at the utter thoughtfulness that had gone into her gift.

“I picked what I thought were the nicest ones.” She continued and he was aware her tone was growing nervous. “But we can swap them if…”

“Katie,” his voice was croaky as he cut her off and looked up at her. He was right, she was biting her lip, worried that she had upset him but nothing could be further from the truth. He moved to take her face in his hands and he kissed her, hard. He pulled away and looked at her speaking with utter honesty and sincerity “This is amazing, Darlin’. Thank you so much.”

Letting out a sigh, Steve’s eyes dropped from the wall to a smaller frame on the sideboard, this one contained a photo of him and Katie a ‘selfie’ of the two of them at the Top of the Rock, taken when they had gone back to New York to visit Tony one weekend in October. He loved it, the pair of them grinning like idiots, Katie wearing a baby blue sparkly beany and matching scarf, her smile genuine and him looking like a loves-struck idiot, pressing a kiss to her cheek as he glanced at the camera. She had the same photo in her living room too.

No, he couldn’t go to bed without sorting this out. Abandoning his half-drunk bottle of Sam Adams, he shoved his shoes back on, grabbed his keys and headed out.

****

Katie didn’t even stay for debrief, more to piss Steve off than anything. It was petty, yes but she was absolutely raging at him. Their relationship had been the talk of the Triskelion for months, and for that reason, they had behaved nothing but professionally on missions, wanting to prove to not only everyone they worked with, but to themselves, that they could remain objective in their work and that them being together wouldn’t compromise the way they behaved in the field.

And now he had fucked that.

She ignored his call which came just as she got home and throwing her phone onto the sofa she grabbed a glass of wine and ran herself a bath, turning her music up loud. She lay back under the bubbles, gently humming along to the music. Music was her thing to calm down to. She’d always played piano, right from the age of four when her mom had taught her, and she wasn’t bad at it either.

The mellow sounds of John Legend’s ‘Ordinary People’ faded into the opening notes of ‘Only One In Color’ by Trapt, and Katie paused, smiling. This song took her years back, to nights in London with colleagues in bars, and then a concert in Orlando in 2009…and Steve, it took her back to Steve and one rainy afternoon in August.

Katie shimmied around, folding laundry and dropping it into the basket as she sang, loudly. It had been ages since she’d done this, just danced around her apartment like an idiot. She turned round to grab the final load out of the machine and screamed as Steve was stood in the doorway, arms folded, leaning against the frame, that annoyingly cute smirk on his face.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Jesus, how long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough” He grinned, crossing the room and wrapping his arms around her. He nuzzled into her neck and the two of them stood there, still, listening to the song that was playing.

“What is it?” Steve asked, pressing a kiss to the spot just below her ear..

“It’s called Only One In Color, by a band called Trapt.” Katie replied, turning her head to look at him. “It kinda reminds me of you actually.”

Steve smiled as they listened for another second before he moved back, his hand taking hers as he raised it above their heads and spun her round, playfully as she laughed, before he pulled him to her.

“Dance with me.”

“What, here? In my apartment?”

“Our own private ballroom.”

“You’ve never danced before.” Katie looked up at him. “You told me.”

“I know, Peggy was right.” He took a deep breath and looked at her. “I was waiting for the right partner. So, what do you say? Teach me?”

“You know I don’t really know a lot of steps.” Katie felt a smile spread across her face as Steve placed his free hand on the curve of her waist and she began to lead them around on the spot, her right hand held in his left, her left curling up and over his right shoulder. She watched Steve, who was concentrating so hard that his brows pinched together slightly, a look that was incredibly endearing.

“Stop over thinking it.” She said gently, looking up at him. “Listen to the music and just let go.”

So he did. He let go, listening to the melody and the words, smiling a little as the lyrics hit home, really making him think about the woman in his arms. She had brought colour to his life, given him a reason to keep going in this world he had found so strange and, well, daunting. As he found his rhythm, he felt the smile pull even broader on his lips. He raised his head from where his eyes had been focussing on his feet and his girl beamed up at him, squeezing the hand that she held.

“See, it’s not that hard is it?” She giggled. Steve returned the grin and shook his head.

“Surprisingly not.” He admitted. They continued to revolve around the space in the doorway between her kitchen and laundry room and Katie lay her head on his chest, Steve’s face automatically turning down slightly so his cheek was resting against her hair. After a minute or so Katie felt him move and instinctively she looked up and could do nothing but smile as they stopped dancing and their mouths drifted closer together. Her hand slipped up, fingers stretching themselves into the short hair at the nape of his neck as his lips met hers, his hand creeping across her back, large palm pressed firmly against her spine.

They never made it to the bedroom, they made it as far as the couch before they were both naked and going at it like a couple of horny fucking teenagers. And since then it had been ‘their’ song.

Katie sighed and drained her wine glass before she set about washing her hair and climbed out of the bath. She dressed in a pair of shorts and a hoodie before pulling her damp hair back into a French braid and had just settled on the sofa to watch TV when the buzzer to her apartment went. Picking up her phone to look at the security camera she took a deep breath and realised it was Steve.

“Sweetheart let me in. My key card is at home.”

She gave no response.

“I’m not going till you do, you know I could do this all day. Or all night.”

Still no response.

“I mean it’s a pretty interesting buzzer.”

With a groan, knowing full well the stubborn little shit in him would do just that, she pressed the button to let him in. Half a minute or so later the alert went again to signal he had requested access to her floor. Once more she tapped to accept and turned her attention back to the TV. She didn’t look up as the elevator door in the panel in her wall slid open, keeping her eyes focussed on the television as he strode into the room, heading straight for her once he’d hung his jacket up on the hooks to the right of the elevator.

“You were gonna watch this without me?” Hesaid gently, nodding to the episode of ‘Brooklyn Nine-Nine’ that was playing as he dropped down next to her.

“Yes.” She replied simply, her arms folded.

Steve fought the smile spreading across his face at her childishness. He knew if she was mad the worst thing he could do was laugh at her and make her think he wasn’t taking her seriously. So, he took a deep breath and turned so he was facing her on the couch, arm resting along the back.”

“I know you’re pissed at me.” He sighed. “But come on Doll, I hate fighting with you.”

“Then stop being a dick.” She snarked back. Steve took another deep breath and looked at her as she continued. “You know what it’s like at work, everyone has constantly analysed everything I do because, hello, Howard Stark’s daughter, and today…”

She trailed off and Steve looked down at his hands and shook his head. “I know. I didn’t mean to make it look like you couldn’t handle yourself.”

They fell into silence and Katie exhaled sharply, deciding to meet him half way. She knew he hadn’t meant to make her feel like he had but, there was also a part of her that had been scared. Not just for her and Evans, but seeing Steve rush in, headfirst with no regard for his own safety just to get to her had really frightened her. Despite his enhanced nature, he wasn’t invincible.

“You need to trust me when I’m out there.” She spoke, her voice was softe.

“I do trust you, you know that.” He looked at her. “But I’m not gonna apologize for looking out for you, Sweetheart. It’s my job. Both as your Captain and your man.”

“I get that, I do.” Katie sighed. “But you put yourself in danger today, running straight into the middle of a fire fight…can you imagine what I’d have done if you’d have been…”

She trailed off, swallowing and took a deep breath before she continued and her words hit Steve. He hadn’t considered she had felt as worried about him as he had her.

“We have to remain objective, and if that means you can’t just abandon the team for me.”

“I know, you’re right, I’m sorry.” He said finally.

She looked at him and took a deep breath, the anger dissipating at his apology and moved to give him a hug, her arms round his shoulders as he wrapped his around her back and pulled her clumsily into his lap.

“I’m sorry for reacting the way I did.” She sighed as she lay her head against his.

“Forgiven?” He asked and she looked down at him, he was giving her his puppy dog eyes. She rolled her own, she couldn’t stay mad at him, especially when there was a small part of her that couldn’t help but adore the fact he cared so deeply for her that he’d rush in, head first with no regard for anything else.

“Captain Dumbass.” She grumbled, before giving him a soft kiss.

“Guess so.” He chuckled. And when she didn’t protest he gently tapped her thigh, and knowing what he wanted she shifted off his lap so he could lay down flat on the sofa, allowing her to drape herself over him like blanket, head on his chest as his arms wrapped around her back, legs tangling together as they settled in to watch their programme.

*****

Katie hadn’t been in the office for five minutes the next morning when she got a message to say Fury wanted to see her. In the years she had known the director, she still found it hard to get a read on him and this time was no exception. She stepped into his office and he nodded to her, and without a word got straight to business, leading her over to the screen on the wall by the sofas.

“I was wondering what you made of this.” He said nodding to the large screen on the wall. The photo displayed was of a tree trunk, cut in half and running down the middle was a long, tube like shape, with some markings on it. The photo zoomed in and Katie frowned.

“These look like the markings on Thor’s hammer.” She looked at the Director.

“Funny you should say that.” Fury nodded. “Because the Spectrographic signatures match the readings from Thor’s hammer too.”

“So whatever was in that tree was Asgardian?”

Fury nodded. “It looks that way, Nova, yes.”

“Where was it found?”

“That’s a trunk from a Norwegian spruce in Trillmarka National Park, Norway.”

“Figures.” Katie bit her lip.

“How do you mean?” Fury looked at her.

“The legends of Thor, they all have origins in Norway. When I asked him about it, Thor explained that Asgardians visited Earth thousands of years ago.” She explained. “They roamed Norway, mingling with the old Norse people, but back then, because humans couldn’t understand the concept of people from another planet, these, well, these aliens were revered as Gods.”

Fury gave a noise of understanding.

“So who took it?” She asked. “Has Thor been back since the whole incident in Greenwich or…”

“I wish he had, then I wouldn’t really give a shit.” Fury sighed. “This thing has gone AWOL. According to my team on the ground, it was taken by a woman and a man, very much of Earth”

“Great.” Katie rolled her eyes, before she continued, her tone laced with sarcasm. “Because every time something alien lands in human hands that ends well.”

Fury gave a snort and pressed a button on a remote and she turned her attention to the TV on the wall of the office. It was screening a news broadcast, footage of a riot. The runner on the bottom of the screen identified the location as Oslo.

“The rioting has left twenty injured and three in a critical condition. Reports indicate that the group of about a dozen was led by this man and woman.”

A picture of the culprits filled the screen. The man was tall, dark haired, dark eyed and had a short beard. The woman, in contrast was slight, blonde and with icy blue eyes.

“And although their motive was unclear, the message was spelled out on the streets of Oslo, for all to see”

“It looks like the item has given them powers beyond those of normal humans.” Fury spoke as the newscast panned over to a fire on the street, this time an aerial view. The fire spelt out the words “We are Gods”.

“So what do you need me to do?” Katie asked, looking at him.

“I’m gonna need you to work with one of my field teams.” Fury continued, looking at her. “My best field team, actually. I want you to help them track these guys down. You have a decent knowledge on Asgardian and Mythological history and the team could do with someone with a little background on the subject.”

“Sir, if these people are as powerful as this report is saying, shouldn’t we consider at least trying to contact Thor, possibly the rest of the Avengers?” Katie looked at him.

“No.” Fury’s response was instantaneous. “I don’t want the Avengers involving. It would attract too much attention.”

“With all due respect, they just set a street on fire. I dare say it’s already attracting a fair amount of attention so whats-“ She trailed off as Fury looked at her, an expression on his face that Katie knew extremely well having seen it several times before. The expression he wore when he was about to drop a bombshell. “Oh, what are you hiding Nick?” She frowned.

“I want you to understand that you’ve been kept in the dark about this so far for a reason. And I know you’re going to get emotional, but if you could refrain from throwing that coffee you’re holding, Nova, I’d appreciate it.”

“Dark about what?” She pressed, her tone irritated. She didn’t have time for this bullshit.

Agent Fury pressed a button on his phone on his desk. “Alright, you’re up.” And with that the TV snapped onto a different channel and she turned to see a familiar man sat in a chair on the screen.

Katie didn’t throw the coffee, instead it slipped from her hands as her mouth dropped open and the entire room swam in front of her eyes.

“Sorry, boss. The God rabbited”

“Just stay awake. EYES ON ME!”

“No. I’m clocked out here.”

“Not an option!”

The room came back into focus again and she looked from the screen to Fury, then back. “This…this is impossible.” She stammered.

“I’d have said the same thing myself not long ago.” Phil Coulson gave a shy little smile.

Katie found herself floundering for words before the anger at the lies and deceit bubbled up.

“No, you…you died! I was there, I saw it!”

“Excellent medics.” Fury concluded.

“They took you away, in a body bag!” Katie’s voice rose to a yell as she ran her hands over her face, unable to believe what she was seeing. She’d cried, mourned the loss of one of her friends, a man who had been her mentor. She looked at Coulson on the screen, and then away again, her eyes misting up slightly.

“No one knew I’d pulled through until after New York.“ Coulson spoke softly “I spent months recovering in Tahiti. It’s a magical place.”

“I want your word that you will not reveal Agent Coulson is alive to anyone.” Fury spoke and Katie turned to look at him, her face curling up in an angry sneer. “I debated long and hard about pulling you into this but we need you.”

Katie eyed the director, chin jutting upwards as she glared at him. “Don’t you ever get tired of the lies?”

“I have no option.” Fury’s face was stern. “I can’t risk the Avengers falling apart.”

“I’m not lying to them for you.” She shook her head “No way. A team is built on trust. Without that you have nohing.”

Fury looked at her for a moment, before he sighed. “That wasn’t a request, Agent Stark. If you tell anyone I’ll remove you from service.”

“So now you’re blackmailing me?”

“I’m merely pointing out your options.” Fury replied simply.

“You are unbelievable.” She shook her head. “Fuck you. Fuck this.”

She turned to walk out of the door before Coulson’s voice rang across the room.

“Katie, please. We wouldn’t be asking this of you if it wasn’t urgent, but we really do need your help

The use of her first name, not her code name, made Katie stop in her tracks. Taking a deep breath she spun back, fire in her eyes as she glared at Coulson’s image on the screen. “Why should I?”

“Because, ” Coulson continued, “you’re the only one I trust enough with this.”

Katie ran her hands over her face, torn between wanting to leave and her desire, sorry, duty to help. In the end her duty won out and she felt her shoulders slump as she looked back towards the two men, giving them both a curt nod.

“Fine, but that does not mean that I’m happy about this. Any of it.”

“You’ll rendezvous with the Bus in Oslow.” Fury instructed, ignoring her emotion completely. “There’s a Jet being prepped to take the new shift of mobile STRIKE team members out as we speak. You can go with them.”

“Whatever.” She shrugged. With a final roll of her eyes she made to leave the room before Fury called after her.

“Agent Stark.”

“What?” she demanded as she spun round, fixing her eyes on his.

“I’m sorry.” He sighed, shaking his head. “But I had to do it.”

She swallowed, before she turned and left, not trusting herself to respond.

*****

Steve was looking for Katie, he knew she’d been to see Fury and was eager to find out what it was about. After asking a few agents if they’d seen her he finally tracked her to one of the kitchens where she was sat, hugging a cup of coffee like her life depended on it, staring down at the table. He frowned, she looked absolutely beat.

“Sweetheart?” He asked tentatively as she looked up at him. His frown deepened when he saw her face. She looked distraught. “Honey, what is it?”

One look in his eyes and Katie knew she couldn’t lie to him, she didn’t want to lie to him. Fuck Fury, fuck all of this.

“Coulson…he…” She stammered, looking up at Steve, her eyes wet.

“What about him?” Steve frowned.

She took a deep breath, tears now rolling down her face. “He’s alive, Steve, he’s fucking alive.”

And then the dam broke and she began to sob. Steve instantly went into autopilot, pulling out a spare chair and moving it close to her so he could wrap his arms around her as she cried into his tevlar clad chest, his own mind whirling at the news.

Eventually she calmed down to tell him everything. And Steve listened, not saying a word, simply holding her hand, his thumb skating over her knuckles as she spoke. He did, however, make an angry noise that was half way between a snort and a growl when she told him Fury had threatened to sack her if she told anyone.

“I honestly thought I’d seen it all, that nothing life threw up would ever surprise me again.” She sighed looking at Steve as she finished explaining.

“Ten bucks says you’re wrong.” He smiled softly and she spluttered a watery laugh through her tears, remembering what she’d said to him the first time they had met. “There’s my girl.” Steve reached over to gently brush her cheek with his hand. “I like it better when you smile.”

“Sorry, but I’m so angry. Fury is lying, again! Has he learnt nothing from everything that’s happened over the past few years?”

Steve didn’t say anything, merely studied her face for a moment and then both of them turned their attention to the door when one of the Junior Agents appeared.

“Agent Stark, Director Fury asked me to tell you we’re wheels up in an hour.”

“Thanks.” She nodded, sniffing before she looked at Steve. “I don’t even have time to pack.”

“You got some stuff in your locker, right?”

She nodded. She always had a few days’ worth of clothes in her locker and toiletries to hand, just in case. She ran her hands over her face and stood up. “You know, I don’t even know who I’m meeting!” She shook her head. “Other than Fitz and Simmons, I’ve no idea who Coulson has on The Bus.”

“Whoever it is I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Steve assured her. “And I know it’s shitty but they asked for you for a reason.”

“Suppose I best make the most of it, seeing as it will be my last mission, you know, on account of me telling you.”

“It won’t come to that.” Steve shook his head “I’m not gonna tell anyone I know.”

“Fury always finds out.” Katie sighed. “Tony is right about him. His spies have spies.”

Thirty minutes later she was walking to the hangar, suited in her SHIELD cat suit, Steve carrying her holdall for her as they walked. The Captain didn’t like this, he hated that she was effectively being manipulated and he would have loved nothing more than to give Fury a piece of his mind but he couldn’t, because he wasn’t supposed to know. They reached the bottom of the jet and Katie turned to him as he handed her bag to one of the agents who nodded to them both.

“I’ll call you as soon as I can.” She promised as Steve looked down at her and nodded

“Make sure you do.” He raised an eyebrow. “Not sure how I’m gonna cope without my best girl.”

“Your best girl?” She teased. “How many others do you have?”

“One or two.” He shrugged. “But they’re in different states, so, they don’t count, right?”

She gave a laugh as she shook her head. “Jerk.”

Steve chuckled and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. “You know you’re the only one for me, Doll.” He dropped a soft kiss to her lips. “Just go do what you gotta do. I’ll be here when you get back.”

He kissed her again, this time a little longer, although both still well aware that they were in the middle of a very busy hangar, surrounded by a lot of people. Sighing, Katie pulled back and allowed herself to melt into his arms for a quick hug before she stepped back.

“I love you.” She said gently.

“You too. Be careful.” He looked at her, his features verging on stern with his warning.

“I’m always careful.” She grinned, walking backwards up the ramp, wanting to look at him for as long as possible.

“Well that’s just an out and out lie.” He raised an eyebrow, hands dropping to the buckle of his belt.

She grinned, blew him a kiss and then disappeared into the main part of the jet. Steve watched for a second as the ramp shut before he turned and left the hangar.

*****

The flight over to Oslow wasn’t too long. Katie used the time to do as much reading up on the item they were tracking as possible, going through all the files that Coulson had sent her. Eventually they docked with The Bus and her and the other agents made their way to the Air Lock. The doors shut and the capsule took them down a level before the frosted glass doors opened and there, stood in front of her, was Phil Coulson. The other agents pushed past, clearly fine at the sight of a dead-not-dead man in front of them.

There was a moment’s hesitation, where Coulson and Katie simply looked at each other, and then Katie’s anger boiled over and she stepped forwards, slapping him, hard across the face. The agents who were milling around all paused as Coulson’s head snapped to the side.

“Guess I deserved that…” He said, turning his head back to look at her as everyone hastily carried on with their jobs.

As Katie stared at her old mentor, her anger melted away and with a little sigh she threw her arms around him. Coulson squeezed her back, before Katie moved a little to look at him, before she spoke for the first time.

“Good to see you again. Not dead, I mean.”

Phil gave a chuckle. “You too Nova. Come on, the rest of the team are waiting in the lab.”

He led her down the hall, Katie following, her eyes taking in her surroundings before Coulson stopped at the end of a corridor, near a door to a room that she could see had a glass wall.

“Now, before you go in, there’s something else you should know.” Coulson turned to face her and she looked at him, letting out an angry groan.

“What now?”

“I want you to know, Fury didn’t want me to tell you as he didn’t think you would come, it wasn’t my decision to keep it from you.”

“Keep what from me?” Her temper was flaring again. “I swear to God AC I am this close…”she held her fingers an inch apart, “to losing my shit!”

Coulson hesitated for a moment and then opened the door to the lab. As they walked in six people all looked up from what they’d been watching and turned to face them. One of them was a dark haired girl she didn’t know and next to her were Jemma Simmons and Leo Fitz who Katie knew from the labs when they had worked with Lawson. Then she spotted Melinda May, an agent only rivalled in fighting skills by Natasha.

And then a pair of familiar dark eyes met hers as another familiar face looked up from a tablet.

“Oh for fucks sake!” Katie muttered and she turned to Coulson who shrugged apologetically.

“Good to see you too.” Ward grinned as Katie folded her arms and glared at him.

There was a moment’s pause as the two simply stared at one another, Katie’s teeth grinding together in irritation, before the girl with the dark hair spoke. “Okay, so this is awkward…”

“And this is Skye.” Coulson spoke, breaking up the tension. “She’s a…”

“Hacker.” May supplied, at the same time Skye replied, “consultant”

Katie was really struggling to keep her temper under control now, so missed the irritated glare Skye shot at May. First Coulson, now this. Fury was going to absolutely get the full Stark-slash-Supernova explosion when she got back.

“So, shall we get down to business?” Coulson asked, spotting the look on Katie’s face, realising she needed to focus on something else. “What have you got?”

“We’ve managed to identify our thieves.” May spoke as Sky pressed something on the tablet she was holding. A close up of the woman’s face appeared on the holo-projector in the middle of the room. “Her name is Petra Larson”

“And this is Jakob Nystrom, her boyfriend. Both thirty. Leaders of a Norse Paganist hate group”

“And their numbers are growing thanks to what happened in London and the internet” Sky scoffed. “Yay internet,”

“Norse Paganist?” Simmons questioned

“Obsessed with anything derived from Norse mythology, stories of Asgard, yada yada.” Skye explained.

“And now a weapon.” Ward gestured to a long object on the table which Katie hadn’t noticed until that point.

“Is that a 3-d print?” She asked, instantly captivated by the item, looking at Fitz who nodded. “May I?”

“Of course…” He said. Katie picked it up and turned it over in her hands, testing the weight as she scanned it up and down. The detailing was exquisite.

“The scan accounted for only one side.” Fitz explained. “There was too much damage to the tree for a complete reproduction”.

“But, see here, it’s clearly broken on both ends.” Katie held it up. “So there are more pieces.”

“Yeah, two at least” Fitz responded, nodding.

“Which means Sid and Nancy may be looking for a complete set.” Ward spoke as Coulson turned to Katie.

“The markings. Just as you said on the call they’re Asgardian symbolism.”

She looked at the item in her hand and nodded. “Similar to Thor’s hammer.”

“Yeah, hard to translate with our limited knowledge.” Couslon shrugged.

“You should give your buddy the God of Thunder a shout.” Sky spoke “He gets his powers from his hammer, right? What if this is his nail to the hammer?”

“He’s off grid.” Coulson looked at her. “And if he has a cell-phone, we don’t have the number.

“I told to get him a pager.” Katie muttered as she peered at the rod and then something stirred in her mind, and she began racking her brains. There was something similar about this, something that she’d seen or read before, if she could only remember what.

“So,” May looked at Katie, “SHIELD’s investigations are on the trail of Nystrom and his followers.”

“We’re charged with identifying the object and finding any other pieces before they do.” Coulson finished.

Katie nodded, still thinking. “If this acts in the same way as Thor’s hammer then that’s a sensible task.”

And then she trailed off as it suddenly hit her exactly what it was she’d been trying to remember.

“No, it can’t be.” She muttered as Coulson looked at her questioningly. She nodded to the item in her hand and then looked back at him. “I could be wrong but this…this could be a piece of the Beserker Staff.”

“The what?” Ward frowned.

“It’s from an old legend that a great warrior, from another world came to Earth” Katie spoke, recalling the research she’d done once upon a time. “He had in his possession a magical staff but he loved Earth so much he never left, and he broke the staff into pieces and hid them.”

“Any idea on where?” Coulson asked. Katie shook her head.

“Well our Pagan friends certainly seem to have some advantage on that front.” Ward sighed. “They found this thing in a hundred and fifty square kilometres of Norwegian forest.”

“Guys, what if it called to them with magic?” Sky asked, her eyes going large and excited.

“Called to them?” May shot her a ‘be real’ look in response.

“We know it’s Asgardian, so the rules are a little bendy here.” Skye pressed.

“Just because we don’t understand something yet doesn’t mean we should regress back to the dark ages, talking of magic and fairy tales” Simmons shook her head and Fitz scoffed his agreement.

“Actually, that’s exactly what we need to do.” Katie looked around as the idea came to her.

“Excuse me?” Simmons asked.

Ignoring him, Katie turned to Agent Coulson. “Remember when we first found the hammer in New Mexico, and I told Fury to consult with an expert on Norse Mythology to fill the gaps.”

“Elliot Randolph,” Phil nodded.

“We should speak to him, he’ll know more about it than me.”

“Alright.” Coulson nodded, looking at May. “He’s a professor at the University of Seville. Set the course, let’s pay him a visit.”

“Shouldn’t take us too long.” May shrugged “But it is getting kinda late. By the time we get there it will be past eight in the evening local time. Can I suggest we head out first thing tomorrow morning?”

Coulson nodded. “Alright. Sounds like a plan. Okay team, lets wrap it up here and get something to eat. Think we’ve earned it.” He then turned to Katie, gesturing with his head for her to follow him out of the room.

He led her down a few more corridors and to a flight of steps which led up to the upper deck of the large airship.

“The Accommodation is probably a bit smaller than you’re used to, but…”

“If it’s that bad imma find a hotel.” She shrugged as she followed Coulson down the corridor.

“What and miss all the fun?” Phil looked over his shoulder. “I’ve had the gin bar stocked specially.”

“Yeah, for the record that isn’t going to take away from the fact that I’m utterly pissed at you and Fury”

“I know you well enough Nova to not even hope that would be the case” Coulson snorted as they turned right. Eventually they reached the living area and Coulson led her to one of the spare rooms.

It wasn’t as bad as Coulson made it out to be, a bed that was slightly bigger than a single but not a full double, with a small wardrobe and a small basin to the side.

“This isn’t so bad.” She turned to Phil who was watching her a little cautiously.

“Glad it meets your approval.” He nodded, leaning in the door way before he took a deep breath. “Look, I really am sorry about all of this. I wouldn’t have-“

“Let’s just find that thing and then I can go home.” Katie cut him off, not in the mood for anymore apologies or explanations. She had a job to do, and the sooner she did it, the sooner she could get back.

“That’s the plan.” Coulson nodded. “I’ll be in the bar in an hour or so, got a few things to sort out before but, well, it would be nice if we could catch up.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Katie replied. There was a pause before Coulson gave her another curt nod.

“I’ll leave you to it.”

With that he turned and left and Katie’s eyes fixed on the now empty doorway. With a purposeful stride, she moved forward and pressed her palm to the pad at the side, the door sliding shut with a slight click.

Katie turned around, looking at her bag which had been placed at the foot of her bed and with a loud, angry groan of frustration she flopped backwards onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

***** Chapter 9

**Original Posting**

#stark spangled banner #steve rogers #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character #Katie Stark #steve rogers fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans characters

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daily-rubbersoul-redux · 3 years ago

Text

Around the same time as Mae Fucking Dying...

"YOU HEARD ME, JACKASS!" Mira retorted, hands on hips, a gesture causing Daito to look and become even MORE confused. Damn authority figures... Like hell this guy was just here for that. What, did he think she was stupid just because she was a kid? Like hell she was! She'd show him! "And even IF that's why your actually here, COP, then I think you'll find that we're MORE than capable of taking care of ourselves! Right Sumi?"

She turned to Sumi for confirmation, only to find that Sumi is Fucking Gone, presumably having booked it as soon as she saw a police officer had shown up. Wonderful.

"Ghhhh... Laurence, back me up!"

She turned to Laurence this time, only to find out that he once again was in Contemplation mode. 'So THIS is where they've been disappearing from.' He thought. 'Interesting...'

Oh for the love of.

Daito meanwhile was simply growing increasingly more confused. "Well, that's good and all, but that doesn't change the fact that it's still dangerous. I'm not saying you're in trouble, just asking that you choose somewhere else to hang out-"

"OH, CAN IT OLD MAN!" Mira shouted, taking a Fight Stance. "That's it, I'm gonna make you beat it."

Daito had no clue what was even happening at this point. Was this normal for teens in this town? He had been told that they were a bit strange, but did this really count? It seemed more like aggressive, really. "Ah, that really isn't necessary, I'm just trying to make sure nothing else bad happens around her-"

He was cut off as Mira Sprang forward and somehow with her 5'3 stature landed a height on this 6'8 man.

Daito didn't even flinch, simply looking even more confused and concerned. "-e. Um. Can I ask you to maybe not punch me? It didn't really hurt, It's just kinda hard to have a conversation like this..."

Mira didn't respond, she just screamed frustrated-ly and, springing back and summoning her stand, rushed forward for another attack.

Cut to 20 minutes later, at the Police Station.

Mira sat in a chair, one hand on her chin and the other holding an icepack to her foot. God dammit- How the HELL was she supposed to know that this guy had CONCRETE PILLARS for SHINS!? Great, and now he was probably going to charge her with assault of some shit... Ugh. And she was so close to being able to afford an apartment too...

She glanced over at Laurence, who was still in Contemplation Mode. "Hey bonehead, WHY DIDN'T YOU HELP ME OUT?"

Laurence's eyes widened, before he glanced around and then looked at Mira "Eh- Wha- Oh, uh- Sorry Mir, I was distracted again, haha..." He rubbed the back of his head.

Mira WANTED to slap him, but she didn't.

Daito re-entered the room, with some unopened bottles of water. "Alright you two, I'm-"

"What, gonna charge us with something? Put us in the slammer for a day? Come at me." Mira sneered.

Daito frowned, looking a bit hurt. "No, I'm going to drive you home-"

"LIKE HELL I'M TELLING YOU WHERE I LIVE!" Mira interrupted again.

Why did this teenager he had just met hate him so much? "....Do you want a water?"

Mira gave a deadpan glare. "No."

"Oh, I'll take one," Laurence said, Taking One. "Thanks!"

Daito nodded, smiling.

"Oh," He said between sips "and you can just drop her off at my place. My Ma 'll get her home." He gave a goofy grin and thumbs up.

"Oh, alright! Thank you!" Daito smiled again.

The drive to Laurence's place was fairly uneventful, except for Mira stewing with rage in the backseat, and a call in on the radio that another kid had been reported missing.

Laurence looked out the window, debating on asking some questions, but...

Nah. He would wait.

#[neon lights] laurence 'jake' cranium #[up down left right] mira terebigĒmu #[neighborhood watch] daito yasai ne #[rebellious musician] sumi yukikara #an rp thread? more likely than you think #and NOW #WE'RE IN IT FOR REAL BAYBE #this is probably like kinda shittly written but it's ok it's just meant to a. establish daito #b. establish mira hating authority figures #and c. laurence :]#heehoo >:]

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persephonesinfernos · 4 years ago

Text

do I wanna know | oneshot.

summary: based on do I wanna know by the arctic monkeys.

pairing: bucky barnes x reader.

word count: 1817.

warnings: angst, sadness.

author’s note: bucky’s POV, italics are memories.

masterlist.

Two months, two months have passed and I was still as miserable as the day hell broke loose.

I know it was my fault, all the things HYDRA did to me has made me more… More non-human, but she changed it. She helped me changed but it all became too much for her.

I was making progress, progress towards a better version of myself. A version that resembled more James Buchanan Barnes than The Winter Soldier. Steve, her, even Sam, all were responsible for it, but mostly her. (Y/N) was like a subtle rain in the middle of a desert, she was something else, something that cannot be described by words. Unlike his thoughts, she always said that she was nothing but ordinary, not superpowers, not especial abilities. Just a girl that was around.

“Well, I never met a one like you.” He said to her when she asked why her.

A tune was heard in the background, that stupid song again. After being released, the song was everywhere and I cannot stand it anymore. It was a constant reminder of her, of the rain in the middle of the desert. I smacked the radio, I was so furious, that it was not just about turning It off.

At first, I played on repeat, the only thing that could help me get going, to help me fall asleep. But now, weeks have passed and it was not the same. It was just a cruel memento of (Y/N).

She explained that it was not his fault, it was not his fault what HYDRA made to him and how it changed him. But she could not take it anymore, all the untrusting vibe she was lately feeling from Bucky, the no communication thing that was settling between both of them. It became too much for her and even though she loved him, it was not the right time.

There were so many nights with drinks in my hand after she said goodbye for good. She just vanished from my life. I know she was still in contact with Sam and Steve, but not me. And both of them had a policy of not mentioned her or anything related to her.

That was until a day I overheard Sam and Steve talking about her, it was not my intention but once I heard her name I couldn’t back off of the conversation. I just needed to know… I needed to know what was like for her now.

It was egoistic and selfish to hope that she was as miserable and broken as me, I knew that. However, if she was feeling the same I was, it could mean that there was still a chance.

“Shh Sam. I do not want Bucky to hear about this, ok?” Steve quietly scream.

“I know that he is miserable, even more than normal, all his persona is even worse than before” Sam sighed. “But (Y/N)? (Y/N) is far worse than that. I swear to god, I’ve never seen her like that in all the 10 years I’ve known her.”

Steve looked frustrated and sad, so much that it even hurt me to saw him like this. “I do not know what to do, they’re both miserable if they are apart but the last months of their relationship were horrible, they grew apart due to the all the missions Bucky was in and the long shifts at the hospital (Y/N) did”.

“Men, she got a promotion and she is considering it. It also means that she will be moving across the country. Did she tell you?” Steve denied with his head. “I want her to go, to forget everything, but if she goes away I can’t help her, I can’t stop her for doing anything stupid. And stupid things have been going around so much lately.”

I have heard enough. I walked out stealthily and headed to my room. I couldn’t let her move away, at least if she was in the same area as me I could make sure she will be safe if anything was bound to happen. But from what I eavesdropped I wasn’t able to do so, not even in the present.

The decision has made, I needed to talk to her and today was the day.

I decided on walking, it was better and it will help to clear my mind as it was a mess right now with all the words I want to tell her and all the emotions that were doing nothing but making everything more complicated.

“Where are you going Buck?” Steve asked. “It’s 10.30 pm and it seems that it is going to rain”.

“I need to get some air, you know? I’m going for a run and I will be back as soon as I clear my mind. Besides, the rain never has never bothered me”. You answered trying to stay calm so Steve would not figure it out on what your plans really were.

I just shook my head off from the thought, maybe if her shift at the hospital would’ve ended earlier it wouldn’t look so suspicious for me to go out in the middle of the night. Steve knows that these days I just go out if it is really necessary or for a mission.

There it was, the door of her apartment. “I am ready for this, I can’t screw this again” I whispered to myself. I took a deep breath and ringed her bell.

When she opened the door she froze. Boy, she looked like hell. Deep black bags under her beautiful (Y/E/C) that now were dead, no light emerged from them. Her hair was a mess at the top of her head and her whole body seemed so fragile and weak to support her weight that it was less than before. Have I done that to her?

Before she could react and closed the door at my face, I put my metallic arm on the door and looked down at her with a small smile “The nights were mainly made for saying things that you can’t say tomorrow day” She stood stoic to my words. “That it is why I am here, because maybe tomorrow I will not be brave enough.”

“What do you want Barnes?” Her voice was cold and lifeless. “I thought I made myself clear when I told you to get the fuck out of my life”.

“You did and I kept my promise, until now.” You smile sadly, trying to stop the tears that were starting to form in your eyes. “I just need to know, I’ve been wondering if…. If the decision we made, you made, was the right one. I need to know if what I still fell flows both ways (Y/N).

“Ha. You are nuts, you know that?” She scolded. “Just leave me alone Barnes”.

I shook her words off, I could see how her façade was breaking slowly. I just needed to push a little longer.

“C’mon, you were never able to lie to me for long.” I smirked, I was getting her nervous, I could tell by how her lips made a thin line. “We could make it if you wanted to, you know that.”

“No.” She shouted, pushing me away with her hands. Tears starting to fall down from her eyes. “Why can’t you respect my decisions?” She said looking at me with rage in her eyes. At least now they were not dead. “If I made the decision to walk away from you was due to a reason, it didn’t matter if I wanted to run back to you and kiss you, it didn’t matter that it made me miserable. It didn’t matter because it was not about what I wanted but what I needed Bucky, and what I needed was myself.” By the end of her rant, she was breathing rapidly, she looked like she was going to run out of oxygen at any given moment.

“C’mon (Y/N)…. Just hear me out please, I am only asking for this.” I ran my hands through my hair, a habit I had for moments like these. I needed to calm the fuck down if I wanted to end this well. “I am here, on your front door (Y/N). Can’t you imagine how hard it is for me? Maybe even harder than for yourself, so don’t be a fucking brat about it and….”

When her fist collided with my jaw I realized my mistake, I was starting to lose my head. “I’m sorry, I am really sorry (Y/N). All this fucked up situation is making me out of my mind, I don’t even know anymore what to do or what not to do. I tried, I really tried. I tried to move on as you said, I even went to some dates but there were never you and nobody will never be you.” I started my monologue with a cascade of tears now falling freely from my eyes. “Maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new.” I sighed. “All those nights that I was drunk, listening to that hell of a song that reminds me of you, I picked up the phone to call you. Ever thought of calling when you’ve had a few? ‘Cause I always do.”

Her body had started to tremble violently at my words, her head hanging low with unwanted tears in her beautiful eyes. Her arms were now wrapped around her figure as if she was trying to stay warm in a December night. I wish I could just close the distance between us and be the one hugging her, but if I did it she would just reject me. She was never one to change her mind even if she knew she was wrong, that pride of hers will always drive me insane.

Instead, I reached my metal hand to her cheek and cupped it, making her look at me “Baby girl, we both know that we are in more pain without each other than together.” I smiled kindly at her. “We need to learn from our past mistakes, but I can’t let you go, I can’t let you move away from me.” Her eyes widened at my revelation.

“I overheard Sam and Steve talking about it, not my intention”. She nodded, her rage was all gone by now and was replaced by fear and sadness. She was afraid to let me in again, I could sense it through her body. But she did not move nor pushed my hand away.

“Doll, I was sort of hoping that you’d stay.” I said serious to her, looking directly to her eyes. “Stay for a little longer next to me.” She closed her eyes, I knew she was going over all the possibilities right now.

“Do you want me crawling back to you?” I said when she opened her (Y/E/C) eyes.

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dreams-of-dozing · 3 years ago

Text

Radio Static

The static bites at the air, ringing out sharply, but quietly. It echoes throughout the abandoned cabin, reverberating off the broken walls. I twiddle with the radio antenna, moreso moving it absentmindedly than with any real purpose. I’ve been at this for how many hours now? Sure I got the static back, but I’ve already managed to prove that doesn’t really mean much. All it indicates is that it’s able to attempt to triangulate… something. I still didn’t know exactly what it was that I was looking for, but everything I’d heard told me it can’t just be this.

I set the radio down on the crooked and decomposing wooden stool, burying my face in my palms, exhausted. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this. I don’t think it’s that I’m incapable of finding it or anything, I just don’t know if I have it in me to keep on trying and failing over and over again.

Suddenly, the static flares up, as if in response. I look over to the radio and pick it up, placing it in my lap. I turn nobs and hit buttons not quite randomly, but without much thought behind it, desperately trying to make use of the opportunity. Now was my chance! I can finally see what they were talking about, I could finally hear what was coming through the static, if I could just- …It stopped. The static just… stopped. Of course it fucking did. It went away just as fast as it appeared, except it took the rest of my progress away with it too.

I set it down on the floor in frustration. I look at the thing like it had chosen to do that of its own volition, an appropriate amount of rage in my eyes for if it really did.

What the fuck am I even trying to do here? I know it involves talking to somebody, or, probably something rather, but everyone had been so vague about it that I didn’t even know what to look for outside of the basics. Everyone was all excited about it, telling me how great of an experience it’d be for me, and how interested I’d be in it all. I don’t doubt them, at least I don’t think I do, but at this point I kinda wish I did so I’d more easily be able to get myself to just give up. Despite how much I want to do so, I just can’t actually bring myself to do it, even when the perfect opportunity presents itself.

The thought did cross my mind that they were messing with me. Playing some kind of cruel prank on me. It seemed a bit much compared to their usual antics, but I wouldn’t exactly put it past them. I’d always been the odd one out in the group. It wasn’t that I wasn’t accepted or anything, but they all acted… differently from me. I couldn’t really explain it more than that. The words didn’t really come to mind.

My eyes wander to the machine on the ground before darting back up. No. I wasn’t thinking about the radio right now. I was thinking about them. I’ll keep doing that.

Their tricks were usually a lot more tame than this. Or, maybe I’d just taken the bait way harder than expected and made it so much worse on myself. I get way too invested in things way too easily, but never quite enough that I can actually carry them through to an end other than just setting it down and leaving it. It’s all that ever happens with anything I get interested in, big or small. I start it, I get frustrated, and then I either quit in a fit of rage or tell myself I’ll just do it later and never do. I always thought my self awareness about that was supposed to be able to help me overcome it, but all that seemed to do was make me feel worse. I know I should carry this through to the end, I never do that with anything, but why would I want to when this all just fucking sucks?!

I kick the radio to the side, and it bounces along the old wooden floor, barely dented, yet somehow quivering. It lets out a noise I don’t care enough to hear.

So what, am I supposed to do? Tell them I fucked it up and get laughed at? Call them out on their bullshit prank and start a fight? Keep trying until they come here and tell me it wasn’t real, as they try to look sympathetic instead of laughing at how pathetic it was of me to keep trying at something so obviously fake? Just… run off and hide in the woods for the rest of my life and leave them to wonder if I’d gotten eaten by a bear or some shit?

None of those seemed like particularly good options. Especially the last one. …Even though it certainly was tempting.

Out of the corner of my eye I see the radio pulsating. I avert my eyes. I told myself I don’t want to think about that right now.

I mean, there’s clearly something going on here, right? There’s gotta be, none of this would make sense if there weren’t at least something weird happening. I sigh to myself. I wish Anna had come with me. She would have known what to do. What to say. Even if it was a prank she’d at least be able to let me down easy. …Probably. I know she’s not the best with words, but she knows this kind of strangeness, and she knows people. She knows me. Probably better than I do. I rub my temples. Why am I bothering to think about this right now…

The static is buzzing now. Louder and louder. I can hear it. Without meaning to, I look over. I pause, then reach down towards it and- SNAP! The radio lets out a sharp noise, piercing my ears.

Why the hell is it so painful to hear? It was loud before, but this isn’t even just the sheer volume of it, the noise itself feels like it’s clawing at my head, trying to tear out my brain and eat it. What the hell is happening?

SNAP!

It happened again. I drop to my knees, barely even noticing it until I was already on the ground. I cover my ears with my hands, but it doesn’t get any quieter. My head feels dizzy. The whole world is spinning, the walls shaking and crawling up towards me. What the hell is happening, what the hell is happening, what the hell is-

SNAP!

I scream. My mind aches. Everything is getting closer. I weakly try to swat at it, not knowing what it’d do even if I hit it. The static is getting in my head. I can feel it crawling around in there. Gnawing at my thoughts like a rat.

SNAP!

I don’t feel it this time. The sound barely registers to me. I feel lost in an abyss swirling around me, threatening to swallow me whole. I accept my fate. I don’t know what I did to deserve this, but I know it was enough.

SNAP!

…The radio broke in half. Split clean down the middle. It was like it was cut with a sawblade. I reach out towards it, and my vision fades.

#short story #my writing #short stories

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tired-eyes-cold-as-ice · 4 years ago

Text

Finally Free

summary: He thought about how long it took him to accept it. Not realize, no, Alex Mercer has always liked boys, there was not a single doubt in his mind. He’s always known. He just hated that part of himself for the majority of his life. Or, Alex comes out.

warnings: panic attacks, implied/referenced homophobia, internalized homophobia, depression, strong language (Alex Swears™)

words: 5783

chapters: 2/2

notes: This was supposed to a cute one-shot where Luke and Reggie write Finally Free for Alex after he comes out to them because I was rewatching JATP (as one does) and noticed the song in Luke's journal and my brain went brrr. And then I started writing it? And suddenly Alex was horribly depressed and everything was miserable?? So, uh, yeah. I promise there is a happy, soft ending though because Luke and Reggie are good friends. I apologize for the Bobby erasure in this, I deadass forgot about him when writing.

read on ao3 <3

---

Chapter 1: What If?

To say that he was scared shitless would be an understatement.

To say that he was so terrified he felt like his heart would force its way out of his body right through his throat would be closer to the truth, though no analogy could accurately describe Alex’s feelings as he stood before his two bandmates. Alex scanned the room, eyes darting from Luke’s guitar in the corner of the studio, to his drum set, the extremely beat up dartboard on the far end wall, even his own shoes—anywhere but the two boys sat in front of him with worried expressions painted all over their faces. Subconsciously, he started fidgeting with the hem of his sweatshirt, rubbing the soft pink fabric between his shaking fingers. Breathe.

He breathed in, words forming in his mind. He opened his mouth to let them out, but nothing happened. He tried one more time, still nothing.

His eyes welled up with tears and he blinked them away angrily, letting out a frustrated groan. Why did it have to be so fucking difficult?

As he reached up to rub away at his eyes, trying to will the tears to go away, a quiet voice broke the silence in the room.

“Alex, if… if you’re not feeling up to it right now, we can just go play and you can tell us some other time.”

Alex couldn’t help but snort slightly at that. Luke Patterson has never sounded this gentle and under different circumstances, Alex might’ve started teasing him for going soft but not now. Not when Luke’s eyes were filled with genuine concern and it was clear he was using all his willpower not to just jump up and pull Alex into his arms since that’s how Luke Patterson comforted people who seemed upset.

And, well, Alex was upset.

He glanced over at Reggie too, the dark-haired boy mirroring Luke’s expression though Alex could see there was more to it under the surface. Reggie wasn’t just worried, he was scared. When Alex joined them in the studio earlier and announced he needed to talk to them in a very serious tone, Reggie instantly deflated and curled in on himself like he did every time someone mentioned his parents or raised their voice even slightly.

Alex felt like an asshole. In fact, Alex felt pathetic. All he needed to get out were three words. Three simple fucking words and it would be all be over. Three words and his friends could stop worrying. Three words and his friends might abandon him.

Either way, it would be over.

He breathed out shakily, ducking his head to avoid the concerned looks. No words came out.

He knew Luke and Reggie would never abandon him. He doubted the two could even moderately dislike him. They were best friends, brothers, family. In fact, a part of Alex thought they already knew, somehow. But there was another part hidden away in the darkest corner of his mind that wouldn’t let him believe any of that and made him doubt. What if?

“N-no... no, sorry,” he finally mumbled, clearing his throat when he realized how hoarse he sounded. “I need to tell you now, it’s just… it’s hard.”

Hesitantly, he lifted his gaze to look at the boys again. They both offered him small, supportive smiles—though Alex could see that Reggie’s was far from genuine—and waited patiently.

For hyperactive teenage boys, they knew how to be patient when the situation called for it. Alex loved that about them. He loved them, he needed them.

What if?

He thought about how long it took him to accept it. Not realize, no, Alex Mercer has always liked boys, there was not a single doubt in his mind. He’s always known. He just hated that part of himself for the majority of his life. Wrong, bad, disgusting—that’s what he’d hear in church every Sunday. That’s what his father would repeat whenever they’d see two guys holding hands on the street, whenever Queen would come on the radio. That’s what he’d hear in school most days. Sometimes directed at him, sometimes not, but Alex heard it every time. He heard every slur, every bad joke, he remembered every shove, every punch, whether they were directed at him or not. He saw, he heard, he felt.

Wrong, bad, disgusting.

Don’t look, don’t touch, don’t feel.

Wrong. Bad. Disgusting.

And then Luke Patterson started appearing in his classes and always sat himself right next to Alex with the dumbest of grins permanently plastered on his face. The same grin he gave the new kid, Reggie Peters, when he walked in on his first day and had no other choice but to sit in the row beside Luke and Alex.

Suddenly, Alex couldn’t hear the slurs and the shoves because the noise was drowned out by Luke laughing at whatever nonsense Reggie just let out of his mouth. It was drowned out by Reggie singing one of his silly country songs and Luke playing the guitar to accompany him as they ate lunch together. Alex could no longer hear the jokes and names because Luke was yelling in his ear about some new band he discovered while Reggie laughed softly in the background.

The world fell away piece by piece and all that was left was their little bubble. Their own little world where Alex could laugh and play his drums and just be. Their own little reality where Alex could grab Luke’s hand and would be rewarded with a hug instead of a punch to his stomach. Where Reggie would cuddle up to his side when he was upset and let Alex run his fingers through his hair until he calmed down. Their own little world filled with music where Alex could look and touch and feel.

What if?

He shook his head no. There was no way. Breathe.

He closed his eyes.

After what felt like an eternity, Alex finally managed to speak up.

“I, uh… I am gay.”

The room was quiet, and Alex did not feel brave enough to open his eyes. He couldn’t.

He couldn’t bear seeing the hatred in his friends’ eyes that was undoubtedly there.

Wrong. Bad. Disgusting.

Memories were flooding his brain. Every bad joke, every shove, every slur, every punch was forcing its way back into his mind from where he tried to repress them, clear images flashing in front of his eyes.

He couldn’t breathe.

His lungs were crying for air, but his throat wouldn’t let any pass through. His chest felt heavy, his hands were shaking, he couldn’t breathe, he—

He was in someone’s arms.

Alex’s eyes shot open with panic and a painful gasp escaped his lips in a desperate attempt to get some oxygen into his lungs. His head was spinning, his body was shaking, his legs felt weak and yet Alex didn’t find himself collapsing on the floor because someone was holding him up. Someone was hugging him. No, not just someone. Luke. Luke was hugging him, and he could feel Reggie taking one of his hands into his own and squeezing it gently.

“Alex, breathe.”

He latched onto that voice like it was a lifeline, forcing his raging mind to stop and focus focus focus and finally drew in a sharp breath.

---

They just stood there for a while. Alex had buried his face in Luke’s neck as he tried to steady his breathing, though he was no longer fighting the tears streaming down his face and soaking Luke’s shirt. Reggie was still holding his hand, squeezing it every so often in reassurance, but it didn’t take long before he also wrapped his free arm around Alex, drawing him close.

“You’re okay, Alex.”

“We love you, dude.”

Alex could scream.

They held him with such tenderness, like he was the most precious thing in the universe, and he felt safe in their arms, he felt loved.

When he finally tried to pull away, Luke tightened his grip around him for just a moment, like he didn’t want to let him go. He gave in eventually and resorted to just holding Alex’s hand like Reggie, whose eyes were red from crying.

They both squeezed his hands at the same time, and Alex couldn’t help but smile at that.

“Thanks, guys,” he hummed, looking up at two of them.

Reggie blushed and smiled at Alex, shrugging as if to say of course. Beside him, Luke broke out into that stupid idiot grin of his and Alex made a note to smack himself any time he felt like doubting these two idiots again.

As if.

---

Chapter 2: Finally Free

Alex comes out to his mother. It doesn't go well.

(Oh, and if you’re wondering about the band practice note, read this chapter.)

Thank you for reading <3

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real-jaune-isms · 4 years ago

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RWBY Volume 8 Chapter 7 Review/Remix

Last episode before the holiday break. The long long long holiday break. And here I am only posting my review the night before we come back... I was having a lot of fun playing my new video games, okay? Let’s just get right into this with the joke everyone has already made. War: What is it good for? Actually a lot, if you can believe it. Only in this specific context though, because the warfare in the American streets these last few days is disgusting and emblematic of what has been wrong with the country for a while. A government leader sending his followers into the nation’s capital on a mission of rage and personal catharsis? Ick. At least in RWBY the tyrant isn’t attacking members of his own population... Oh wait, Mantle. :P

For a moment you might be fooled into thinking we’re starting back in the farmlands of Mistral, maybe getting another look at Oscar’s earlier life or seeing a little more of Nora’s mysteriously tragic past before she and Ren met. But no, these are the wheat farms on the outskirts of Atlas and Sabyrs are charging through like raptors through the tall grass in Lost World. A battalion of Atlesian soldiers, human soldiers I might add, stand armed to meet them. But even if they’re armed they are by no means ready. Monstra keeps coughing up a new wave of Grimm, and I do mean a wave, every minute or two and Atlas is pretty damn whelmed in the face of it. There are some big bots with guns standing in straight lines, but the majority of the defense put up by Remnant’s supreme authority on military power and strength is mortal men with fear in their hearts rather than expendable robot soldiers. And the big bots seem to be lined up in a way that the ones in the front block the ones in the back, so that’s just poor planning too. It’s just a concerning sight all together, and they are not efficiently handling the coming enemy. We cut up to Ironwood in his office, and it seems he is not dealing with this situation well at all. We know he’s under a lot of stress from all the recent events, but they are in fact mostly his own fault due to his poor decision making skills in times of crisis, and his single minded drive he calls a Semblance. Speaking of the eternally expanding list of Ironwood’s bad ideas, he decides to evacuate all the civilians into Atlas’ below ground subway tunnels. Fun fact: There were Apathy among the Grimm Monstra has been spitting out. Second Fun Fact: Apathy were last seen thriving and murdering in an abandoned underground tunnel system beneath a well. If one is familiar with fantasy television pop culture of the last decade, the Crypts of Winterfell might pop into your mind as a similarly poor place to hide all your unarmed women and children. Y’know, cuz in Game of Thrones they were facing a guy who could raise the dead as his minions and crypts are just tunnels full of corpses. Just saying, this could end up being a non-birthday massacre. Whatever captain of lieutenant Ironwood was talking to is hesitant to go along with this idea, but Ironwood puts his foot down by putting his fist down. And so his voice comes on over the city-wide PA system to tell everyone they need to get down into the subway for their own safety. Compared to the organized marching and relative calm of the poor folks down in Mantle, these rich fat cats practically trample each other to run and scream down the stairs. A father is concerned his daughter is going to get snatched up by a swarm of Lancers, but seems even more upset by the squad of airships swooping in to combat them.

Speaking of airships, we cut to the one Marrow and Harriet are flying. The Ace Ops have arrested YRJ, because of course they did, and they all hear radio chatter as pilots are reporting in about how Monstra is too tough for them to pierce from the outside with any of the weapons available to them. Winter checks in over comms to report her team’s limited successes, and Ironwood tells her to stay on jailor duty for a bit. Yang snarks at Winter for continuing to follow orders despite the circumstances, but conversation is stifled by Monstra coming into view for the group. Jaune laments that the beast now serving as Oscar’s confinement is larger than they had imagined from a distance, and Vine continues to be rigid in his assertions as to just what Grimm can and cannot do. “Grimm don’t take prisoners” he says, as if that’s an irrefutable fact. It’s not like any Grimm have done anything new or unheard of recently, like talk or grow wings or exist within a river of evil sludge or shoot up miles into the air as a geyser or have gravity Dust crystals in their underbelly to fly, or as you are witnessing right now belch out ponds worth of sludge from with waves of Grimm are emerging to fight your ground troops. Yep, we definitely know every single thing a Grimm does, especially one brought here by the mistress of the entire Grimm collective who is commanding most of them here. You sure are smart, Vine... Yang continues to be riled up and ask they be let go to help, but Elm and Vine hold her in her seat. Ironwood is heard giving the Manta jets new orders and reveals Command is working on a solution for Monstra. Winter, naturally wanting to be kept in the loop, asks what that might be. He reveals the science team is putting together a bomb that might be able to take the whale out if detonated inside it. That means Winter and the Ace Ops will be delivering it into the literal belly of the beast. I don’t know if he intends for it to be a suicide mission with the bomb going off as soon as they’ve got it inside, or if it’s just incredibly risky to try and get inside Monstra at all, but Winter pales at this news and her eyes go wide before sadly drooping closed again. She composes herself and grows determined again as she accepts the new marching orders. Jaune and Yang are again audibly against these plans due to the risk to Oscar’s safety, but they are subdued as needed, though we see Winter’s act isn’t absolute and her hands are shaking.

Meanwhile, Salem is having the time of her life doing her best Mickey Mouse impression. Classical music plays as she conducts the waves of Grimm sludge out of Monstra’s mouth like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice playing conductor to the stars themselves. Emerald watched from a distance, and seems less than thrilled about the whole thing. She heads down the halls and has to use her Semblance to keep a Seer from noticing her and potentially reporting her going where she doesn’t need to be to Salem. And where she’s going is the door outside Oscar’s torture room. He’s coughing up blood, and Hazel is still insisting he start telling the truth before Salem loses her patience and just kills him despite how futile it’d be. Instead Oz starts asking some questions of his own: Does Hazel know why Salem sought to recruit him in particular? It turns out she approached him with the promise of making a new world order where there won’t be any kingdoms or Huntsman Academies. Oz just has to laugh at that naiveté. When Salem gets the 4 Relics, there won’t be a world at all. She’s been around for so goddamn long, all she wants is for it to end, and she thinks taking the whole world down is the only way to get it anymore. This just frustrates Hazel, and we learn why. He’s pretty damn sure Salem can’t die at all, because when she first approached him about working together he spent the better part of a day killing her over and over and over again. This man, whom we know from the Battle of Haven to have massive reserves of Aura and strength to endure and keep fighting, kept fighting until he was too worn down and exhausted to lift his fists again. And in that time of weakness and awe at her power, Salem made her sales pitch that even if he couldn’t kill the one leading the Grimm he could at least have vengeance on the establishment sending young people to their deaths against her. Oz points out that that’s exactly why she went to him, because she could make him believe this was the right way, that it would bring him closure. It’s what Ozpin deserves, Hazel argues, and Oz does not disagree. But does Oscar deserve it? Do the innocent people who haven’t been affected by Salem or Ozpin yet? No, this isn’t for justice, this is personal. Because Salem said it would help Hazel. Has it?

We don’t get an answer to that, instead going back up to Weiss’ room in Schnee Manor where she’s reapplying Nora’s bandages. Still mostly unconscious, Nora mutters “Now what... am I good for?” I can think of a great many things Nora is useful for outside of her great strength and straightforward approach to combat, but its a damn shame no one has actually bothered to tell her that before now. Before Weiss has a chance to offer any, Blake and Ruby enter the room with cups of tea. I’m not ashamed to admit I initially thought they were hot chocolate cuz I’m not used to tea being that sort of amber color. Weiss admits that she’s done the most her limited medical knowledge can offer, and Nora needs more than that. Blake expresses her concern for the other half of their group, but almost slips up and says... well we’re just not sure, but we like to assume she was gonna say she’s especially worried for someone in particular. The shippers can fill that in how they like. Their moping is interrupted by May entering the room with some less than stellar news from Fiona and the others down in Mantle. They haven’t seen Yang’s team in a while, and with everything going to hell like this a search party is at the bottom of the priority list. She’s about ready to get back on the airship and head back down to Mantle, but Weiss protests and this sparks a debate. May points out that Mantle doesn’t have the luxury of the Atlas military protecting them so Ruby’s group and the Happy Huntresses are the only thing keeping the people safe from the chaos of the invasion, but Weiss argues that there are still people suffering up her and I have to agree. Just because a police force is around doesn’t automatically mean they’re doing the best job of keeping everyone safe. But Weiss pushes the wrong button by asking about May’s family. The Marigold’s were ashamed of the way their “son” acted, wanting to help the suffering down in Mantle. And so May would no longer let herself be called that, she became a woman proudly working as part of the Happy Huntresses for the service of the people. She kicked her Marigold name and reputation to the curb and her cousin Henry stepped up as the socialite snob instead.

This cannot have been an easy scene for Kdin to record, but we all need to give a standing ovation for her performance in it. Powerful words that likely hit very close to home. What a queen.

May is sure Weiss gets where she’s coming from with their families casting them aside in favor of a more obedient heir, her being replaced by Whitley after her outburst at the charity concert. Weiss wants to voice her disagreement, but May questions whose side she’s on in all this. Blake doesn’t like that, they’ve heard this talk about taking sides before and judging by her tone she’s none too happy to be hearing it now. May is about to give her a strongly worded piece of her mind too but Ruby stands between them to remind everyone there are no sides. All of humanity needs to be united, and Salem is the one creating the tension that’s dividing them so their real enemy is her. The only question now is how do they get out of this problem? The solution might be hiding just around the corner, literally. Whitley has been listening from behind the door, and he seems a little inspired.

Meanwhile Oz seems to have just finished telling Salem’s dark cursed backstory to Hazel, and it seems her final plan really is to have the world so divided and ruined that when the gods are brought back to judge it they will deem Remnant a failure and destroy it and hopefully her with it. Hazel seems less than inclined to believe this story though, he still holds a damn hard grudge over his sister. Oz is getting nowhere so Oscar asks to be put back in the lead, and so he is just as Hazel is about to wallop them again. Oz is willing to trust him so he can earn Hazel’s trust in return. So he goes right ahead and tells the big guy Jinn’s name and that it’s how you summon her for one last question. Hazel seems mad that Oscar gave up the info so effortlessly after all that, but Oscar asserts that he’s not telling Salem. He’s telling Hazel, and letting him decide what to do with the knowledge and the chance to gain deeper knowledge still. Pretty rad strategy. Wouldn’t you know it though, Emerald is still listening outside the door and heard everything. She goes to tell Mercury, but he’s busy packing a duffel bag for a trip to Vacuo. Guess Salem doesn’t need him here right now so we’ll get to see him again in Volume 9 or 10. He’s less than convinced that they should try and use this behind the scenes knowledge to go against Salem, cuz if Hazel couldn’t do it then why would he change his tune now? And why would they risk their necks too? It’s not like Oz was telling the truth, right? Salem isn’t really gonna destroy the world! But the teens get another surprise lecture from Uncle Tyrian: Of course Salem plans to destroy Remnant!! You couldn’t tell from the start? Everything about her screams end of the world, and it is beautiful! And if you thought she’d do anything different then you must really be crazy... Bold worlds from a psychotic serial killer, but we already know he’s unhinged. Mercury doesn’t much like getting this rude awakening though, especially since Tyrian will be the one going with him to Vacuo. Merc and Em share one last sad look, but he’s made his bed and now he’s resigned to lie in it. Bye bye Mercury, see you after Emerald has probably switched sides and will have to face you as an enemy...

Speaking of ships soaring through the air, we go back to the Ace Ops and YJR heading for Monstra. Yang is protesting the bombing plan since Oscar is still inside, but Vine insists they can’t afford to wait and risk further death and destruction. Jaune offers a side plan, send the three inside Monstra ahead of the bombing squad to scope things out for them and try to rescue Oscar while they’re doing recon. Marrow is shocked that they’d be willing to go into the literal belly of the beast alone, but Yang asserts he’d do the same for one of his teammates if they were in this position, right? He doesn’t have an answer for that. Elm argues that trading their lives just for one other person is stupid, but amazingly it is Ren who objects. Oscar is their friend, and they will do whatever it takes for someone they care about like that. A real turnaround from his attitude of closing himself off emotionally, but I guess he’s realizing how ridiculous it sounds coming from other people? Harriet gets out of her seat to do what she does best and start talking down to someone as naïve and wrong. Feelings are stupid, the job is what matters. When you lose someone you just replace them and forget about them. We find out that Winter is indeed meant to be the new leader instead of Clover, and before Marrow there was apparently a member of the team named Tortuga, but Ren is not about to let anyone tell him that someone is replaceable. You don’t say that to Team JNPR, and we definitely don’t say that about Ren... Not now. In his outrage, Ren suddenly finds... clarity. He starts seeing the world a little differently. In less cryptic terms, his Semblance seems to have evolved and he now sees people’s emotions swirling around them as colorful bursts of flower petals. Harriet is actually furious about losing Clover, she’s lying to herself and trying to suppress her feelings. She does not like being called out like that, but the rest of the squad needs to be put on blast. As opposed to Hare’s red petals Marrow is surrounded by blue that I guess would mean sadness or depression, Elm has orange and some red, and Vine is clouded with green. The meanings of the last two are a little less clear, but they’re all definitely feeling some strong things that they’re trying to hide under a calm façade. This is the reason the Ace Ops lost to RWBY, they’re all held back by trying not to connect with each other so unity and team bonds never formed. Elm does not like being told she’s a loser because she won’t make friends, but at least it’s a a reaction, which means he’s absolutely right. She’s about to deck Ren in the face but Winter steps in to get everyone calmed down. She looks these three “fugitives” over, and makes a decision. She’s going to trust her sister’s friends. They will get the teens in close and give them a small window of time to try and get in and out before the Ace Ops need to bring in the payload and blow it all away. Harriet is pissed Winter is giving these “traitors” a chance, and questions her decision thusly. But you’re outranked, you boob, and you can’t do a damn thing to stop her from showing human decency. They have a very tight schedule to attempt this rescue, and Jaune accepts that fully. The three get uncuffed and are given their weapons back as the ship lands at the front lines. Ren tries to appeal to the doubt and regret he can see in Marrow to get him to switch sides while the getting’s good. Marrow wants to, but he sticks to the job for now. Yang and Jaune head out first, while Ren lingers to tell Winter he knows she doesn’t want to be a part of all this anymore either, and we see a rainbow of many emotional petals around her head. Either she has a balance of many emotions in check and is the most levelheaded of the Ace Ops, or she has the most emotions repressed and her mind is a tempest of feelings that aren’t being addressed and may spell her end... take your pick.

As this militant Schnee considers her options, we go homeward to see Weiss and the others heading for the front door. May isn’t keen to stay her any longer than needed, and the kids need to make a choice about where she’s dropping them off. Either they go to the front lines here in Atlas or back down to Mantle to help with the chaos there. No other options, and especially no breaking their jailbirds out for an assist. May doesn’t have the optimism and heroic hope that Ruby still holds dear, she won’t entertain the idea that this can become a complete victory all around. This isn’t that kind of world. Either they help one place, or they help another. And even then, that’s no guarantee wherever they go will be successful at stopping the invasion. It’s very depressing, and it’s on these kids to accept the facts and make the hard decisions. If you take a look at the last few Volumes, Ruby does seem to have a bit of a habit of ignoring the dreadful possibilities/facts in favor of pursuing a hopeful and bold plan that could fix everything immediately so she doesn’t have to cope with reality and actually grieve her mistakes and losses... I’m not saying it makes her a bad character or that she’s wholly wrong for trying to see a bright side whenever possible, just that this is an unhealthy strategy for a leader with so much on her shoulders. But before anyone has time to make a decision right now, there’s a hard knock on the front door. Everyone draws their weapons and approaches slowly, before Weiss cautiously opens the door. In a most definitely welcome surprise, she is greeted by Klein!!! She missed him dearly, and apologizes for whatever fault she had in his being fired, but while cycling through personalities he assures her she has nothing to be sorry for since it’s all Jacques’ fault, the bastard. Turns out, Klein is here to use his medical knowledge to treat Nora. What, didn’t you know all butlers to heroic millionaires have field medic training? Alfred Pennyworth set the gold standard, I dare say~ But of course, Weiss didn’t call him and none of her friends know his number so who told him to come?... Would you believe it, Whitley is responsible and we could not be more proud of him! Weiss certainly is, and she gives him what might be his first genuinely loving hug in years. Klein heads upstairs to begin treatment, while the rest of the group share a hopeful moment. But this silence too comes to a crashing halt as there is further ruckus outside. This time Ruby answers the door, to see a smoking crater in the front driveway. RWB rush outside and kneel at the edge of the crater as the smoke clears. Penny has crash landed, and lies there in a pool of what we can only presume to be her green synthetic blood. All she has the strength left to do is apologize before she passes out and the screen darkens with her. There lies the end for the next 6 weeks, and we were left to panic and speculate all the while. Too bad I’m a lazy bugger who only got this review out now and there’s no tension left before the thrilling continuation comes tomorrow morning. So lets all get one last panicked sleep in before the living nightmares come for our girls! Penny is totally gonna be under Watt’s control, the Hound is coming, it’s all gonna be a huge damn mess... Can’t wait, can you?~

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fanaticalthings · 5 years ago

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Dance With Me

AO3 Link

Destiel 15x09 Coda

It’s over.

They’d defeated God himself. They were free at last— free to be whoever they wanted to be— free to do whatever.

Sam seems content, and so does Cas. And for a split second, everything felt fine.

But Dean knew better than to believe everything was alright.

Chuck was gone, but there was now another problem that needed dealing with— the Mark.

Dean should’ve stopped him. He knew he should have. But deep down, he felt a disgusting amount of relief at the thought that he would not have to bear the Mark of Cain again.

Dean’s sitting in the kitchen with a glass of whiskey in hand when Cas walks in.

He looks tired, but when his eyes land on Dean, they soften.

“Are you doing okay?” Cas says.

Dean almost wants to laugh, but all he manages is a weak grimace. He knew firsthand what the Mark did to you— how it twisted you into someone you weren’t. Cas shouldn’t have been worried about Dean. He should have been worried about himself.

Cas must notice Dean’s inner turmoil because he grabs the chair next to Dean and sits down.

“I think I should be the one asking you that, buddy,” Dean says.

Cas looks at Dean with so much affection that it hurts. Dean doesn’t deserve those looks.

“Please don’t blame yourself for this, Dean. I chose to bear the Mark and I would do it again if it meant you never had to suffer its effects again,” Cas says this with so much certainty that it scares Dean.

This angel was willing to sacrifice so much for him. Falling from heaven, killing his own brethren, rebelling against the one thing he was made to serve and all for what? For one human?

It makes Dean realize how stupid he was for taking Cas for granted all those years.

“Cas, I’m scared.”

Dean feels vulnerable expressing his feelings so freely with Cas, but after everything that’s happened in purgatory, he realizes that it’s time to suck it up and stop running away from his emotions. He may not get any more moments like this with Cas in the future.

“I know,” Cas says. He doesn’t reassure Dean.

Deep down Dean was hoping the Mark wouldn’t affect Cas like it did for himself. He hoped desperately that maybe Cas’ grace would help him.

He knew better than to believe that.

The thought of Cas turning into a blood-thirsty killer makes his stomach churn. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end. They’d gotten rid of Chuck, they should’ve gotten their happy ending, they shouldn’t be dealing with more problems, they shouldn’t-

“Dean,” Cas says softly. His eyes convey an infinite amount of sadness.

He intertwines his fingers with Dean’s as if to let him know he’s still there— that he won’t leave.

“We’ll look for something, Cas,” he says. “Maybe we could find a cure this time.”

Cas looks unconvinced, and frankly, Dean feels pretty unconvinced too.

They’d tried so hard to find a solution before— back when Dean was the bearer of the Mark. Chances are if they tried looking again, the results would be the same.

Cas’ grip tightens around his hand.

“Dean, if I start turning, promise me you’ll stop me. Do whatever it takes to stop me.”

Dean’s heart starts to clench in pain. He avoids looking into Cas’ eyes.

“Please,” Cas almost whispers. “Don’t let me become a monster.”

Dean drinks the rest of his whiskey and chances a glance at Cas. He seems eerily calm— like he’s already accepted what’s to come.

But Dean would do whatever it takes to keep Cas with him. He’ll try his damn hardest to fix Cas before giving up. At the moment, though, he can only reassure.

“Ok,” Dean reluctantly relents. “I promise.”

Cas offers him a small smile, but Dean doesn’t feel any better.

“Just-” Dean begins. “Just…Stay with me…For a little while longer.”

Blue eyes meet his, and Cas leans in closer.

“Of course, Dean.”

~~~~~~

It’s not okay.

Dean desperately clung to the hope that the Mark wouldn’t affect Cas— wouldn’t take him. But it was clearly hopeless.

He’d spent months looking for a possible cure. Nothing.

Little by little, Dean could see Cas’ sanity slip through the cracks.

He wanted to brush it off at first—play it off as just Cas getting restless from always being cooped up in the bunker.

But Cas would only get worse.

It was just small incidents in the beginning— Cas impulsively smiting a vamp they were interrogating— Cas recklessly running into a werewolf nest.

Dean hoped it was just simple frustration and impatience after the monsters started increasing in numbers.

It wasn’t. Dean knew and so did Cas.

It was the last straw when Cas nearly killed a group of high school girls, claiming that they were in the way of solving the case.

When they returned to the bunker, Cas took Dean aside.

“It’s changing me,” he says. Even now, those blue eyes don’t look like they belong to Cas. They look remorseful, but they hold a murderous intent.

“Cas-”

“You have to stop me.”

Dean didn’t want it to have to come to this. It was all he really had left— clinging to a fraying string of false hope to keep him going.

“You have to stop me,” Cas pauses “or I’ll end up killing you.”

Cas says it with so much conviction— so much confidence.

Dean believes him.

“I don’t wanna lose you, Cas. Please,” Dean whispers.

The space between them lessens, as Cas grabs Dean’s hand.

“You know what you have to do.”

Dean knows. He’s known what he’s had to do from the very moment Cas took on the Mark. He knows, but he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. He doesn’t want to accept that he’s losing a bit of Cas every day. They can’t lose this battle.

“You can’t go dark side on me, Cas. Not yet.”

Dean drops his head to lean on Cas’ chest. He can hear the faint heartbeats of the angel. It grounds him. It makes him remember that they’re real— that Cas is still here with him— that he hadn’t flown away with his invisible wings just yet.

“Just…Please….Stay with me, for a little while longer,” Dean pleads.

Cas, ever loyal, stays with him.

“Of course, Dean.”

Dean knows what he has to do. He has to lock Cas away. He has to build a ma'lak box.

——-

On rare days, Cas is able to fight the mark and stay himself but even those days are dwindling. Dean doesn’t know how much longer he can stall.

He’d finished building the ma'lak box some time ago. But Dean was selfish. He didn’t want Cas to leave just yet. He didn’t want Cas to leave at all. But Cas grows more restless, more angry, more dangerous.

Dean doesn’t know how much time he has left with him. Not much left, that’s for sure. He’s so frustrated that he sometimes takes it out on Sam. They fight about the Mark. About how there is no cure, about how this is going to end. But Dean is tired, and the fight leaves him as quickly as it had arrived.

The worst almost happens. Cas nearly kills Sam during a case in Illinois. They were investigating a series of bizarre murders. It started off normal. Well, as normal as things could get in their lives. But one disagreement from Sam sends Cas flying off the edge in a blind rage. It happens so quickly in front of Dean that he doesn’t react fast enough. Cas has got Sam pinned beneath him in a stranglehold.

Dean pleads for him to stop, yells for Cas to snap out of it. But Cas doesn’t listen. And Dean believes he would’ve gone through with it, had Dean not reached out to touch Cas’ shoulder.

In a swift movement, they’re face to face. Cas’ eyes suddenly soften, but only for a brief second before they widen in terror. He looks down at Sam and frantically backs away from the brothers.

“I’m sorry,” he simply states in a broken voice before disappearing.

They finish the case without him.

——–

Once Dean patches Sam up, he goes to his room to turn in for the night. They don’t talk about what happened.

He doesn’t feel like sleeping. Hell, he hasn’t been sleeping much at all lately.

Instead, Dean sits on his bed and prays. Prays to Cas.

“Cas, I don’t know how much longer I’ve got with you, man, but please…please come back. Come back home. I need to know you’re alright. I need to know that you’re still you.”

A pregnant silence fills the room, and Dean almost believes that Cas won’t show up, until he hears the familiar beat of wings.

Cas stands in front of him. But he doesn’t look okay.

The angel in front of him looks so lost, so broken.

“Dean,” Cas speaks quietly.

Dean stands up and reaches forward to pull him into a tight embrace. Cas barely hugs back.

“I can’t stop it anymore,” Cas relents.

His once vibrant blue eyes now reveal a lack of motivation. They show that the man behind those eyes had given up. They both know they aren’t winning this battle.

“Do it now, Dean. While I’m still myself.”

Dean feels tears start to trail down his cheek. He clings to Cas tightly, but Cas pulls away.

“You have to, Dean. Lock me away. Send me to the ocean.”

Dean wants to scream at him, to lash out and blame Cas for not trying hard enough to fight the Mark, but it’s hopeless. He knows it is. But that doesn’t stop him from feeling guilty. It should be him locked in the ma'lak box, it should be him dealing with the consequences. Not Cas, definitely not Cas.

Dean doesn’t say anything. Instead, he stands up and turns on the radio.

They let the hum of the music fill the silence of the room. Dean closes the space between them. Cas lets him.

“Dance with me,” Dean says.

Cas stares at him but must see the sadness in Dean’s eyes because he agrees without a fuss.

They intertwine their fingers and hold each other like it’s the last night on Earth. They don’t really dance. They just sway around, really. But for a moment, Dean can pretend that this was the happy ending they deserved. No more monsters, no more fighting, no more Mark. But those feelings quickly disappear when he feels the presence of the ma'lak box.

Realistically, it’s rooms away from them. But Dean can feel it’s weight burning holes through the walls and floors to remind him that it’s never over. It really hits Dean that this is it. End of the line for him and Cas. So he says the words he’s been meaning to say for so long now.

“I love you.”

It’s so quiet that Dean thinks Cas might not have heard him. But he does. He always does.

Cas looks right into Dean’s eyes and cups his face. He’s smiling sadly.

“I wish we could’ve done this under different circumstances,” Cas murmurs.

“Me too.”

All of a sudden, they’re kissing. It’s soft and gentle and full of unimaginable sorrow. Cas embraces Dean like he’s the most important thing in the world.

And he is in Cas’ eyes.

“I love you, too.”

Dean starts to sob. This can’t be happening.

“You stupid son of a bitch,” Dean says, but there’s no venom in it— just hopelessness.

“I know,” Cas whispers back.

They continue to rock back and forth to the music. None of them wanting to admit what happens next.

“Stay with me, for a little while longer,” Dean chokes up.

Cas’ grip on him tightens.

“Of course, Dean.”

The radio drowns out the silence as a new song starts to play. They lament together.

I.. Can't….Help….Falling In Love…With…You….

They lose the battle.

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anxiously-introverted · 5 years ago

Note

Can you write a a scene about Will first activating his powers and losing control and El and Mike ( Mike is there cuz it’s the holidays so they’re all visiting eatchother) and maybe Joyce idk and they have to snap him outta it and calm him down? What others powers/other stuff can he do with his electricity?

On top of being able to manipulate electricity, I also like the idea of Will having telepathic powers like El’s. However, instead of being able to enter the minds of people, Will is able to enter, and even control, the minds of the creatures from the Upside Down (such as the Demogorgon).

Here’s the scene I was picturing! Please be aware, Lonnie is a jerk with homophobic views in this and the kids like to swear. Hope you enjoy!

“Why is it that every time something seems to go wrong here nowadays, it’s because of you?” Lonnie snarled, hand twisted into the fabric of Will’s shirt as he cornered his son against the brick wall of the local convenience store. It was cold, wind nipping harshly at Will’s skin as he stared up at his father with wide eyes.

The past few days had been going so well for him. The Party had already had several hangouts and movie nights, trying to spend as much time as possible together before Will and El had to return to their new home in New Mexico. So far, it almost felt as if things hadn’t really changed. Sure, Will still felt that particular pang of hurt when he saw Mike and El showing each other affection. Yeah, there came a certain sting when he heard about how some kid at their school was so great at Dungeons and Dragons, yet the group never wanted to play when Will had been suggesting it. Maybe he did still feel left out when everyone talked relationships while he knew he could never discuss the feelings he had without the others being disgusted.

Perhaps there was still a lot of pains that still rattled him, but the small flashes of happiness with his best friends that made up for it. For the most part, at least.

Yesterday, though, there was a sudden change in the mood. Lonnie Byers had blown into town like a glowering tumbleweed, the news of what happened during the summer making its way back to him after a long delay.

His unstable son, after going in and out of a lab that was eventually shut down permanently, had also been involved in a huge incident at the mall which resulted in it being destroyed. There was gossip of Russians and the disappearance of the chief of police.

He insisted that he would’ve come sooner to see Will, if only Joyce had given him their new address. He told Will he’d been so worried, that he didn’t know what to think when he’d gotten random bills from the lab and the hospital. He assured that had he’d known everything that had been happening, he would’ve been here. But, he said, he was here now.

He said he wanted to know what was going on.

He said he wanted to help.

Will felt like a fool for believing him.

“It wasn’t bad enough that you had to be a dirty little queer,” Lonnie said with curled lips, as if the taste of bile came up with the word. “But now I’ve got people around here sayin’ my kid was moved to a looney bin outta state, locked up with the other bleeding hearts and crazies. You have any idea how goddamn humiliating it is to have the town freak as my son?”

Tears stung at Will’s eyes, though he refused to let them fall. He tried blinking them away, hazel eyes clearing up the blur minimally as he tried to retort, “Why do you care? You don’t even live here anymore! I don’t even live here anymore!” He was shaking, he was struggling. He felt like he was in a cage with a lock that was on the verge of breaking.

“Oh, so it’s fine to turn your family into a fucking joke?!” Lonnie snapped. “Not to mention all the damn bills that keep flooding in from the hospital. You have any idea how much money-“

“All you care about is money!” Will cut in angrily, fear and frustration coming out in a rage that had been smothered and repressed for as long as he could remember. His chest felt like it was burning, his head feeling weightless and as if a boulder rested on it all at once. The building resentment paced in his mind like a tiger in an enclosure two sizes too small. “I know about how you tried to sue Sattler after the funeral! I know you only cared about making some quick money before ditching mom and Jonathan all over again!”

For a brief instant, there was shock on Lonnie’s face. He had never heard his son, embarrassingly weak and shamefully reserved Will, speak to him with such venom. If he weren’t so pissed, he may have felt proud. Instead, Lonnie hatefully shot back, “That money would’ve done us a hell of a lot more good than what you’ve been doing! Meltdown after meltdown, disaster after disaster, not once have you ever dealt with any of this like a man! That money wouldn’t have ruined this family’s reputation, and it wouldn’t have dragged us to the brink of debt!”

Hotter, hotter, hotter, there may as well have been lava in his veins. Will felt more and more tears gathering in his eyes, hatred for himself and the man in front of him strangling his heart with barbed wire. There were so many things he wanted to scream. It wasn’t his fault the Demogorgon came after him; it wasn’t his fault the Mind Flayer haunted him every day until eventually robbing him of his autonomy; it wasn’t his fault Billy and the others were possessed, nor were the deaths or the destruction of StarCourt his fault. He didn’t want any of it to happened, he didn’t mean for any of it to happen. All he wanted was to forget, to move on, to start a new chapter-

“It would’ve been better for everyone if you just stayed dead!”

A tear broke free, gliding down his cheek. The lock on the cage broke and Will raged.

In the Wheeler’s basement, Mike looked at the clock hanging on the wall for the fifth time within the hour. His worry and agitation was palpable, setting the other Party members on edge. El rested a gentle hand on the other’s arm, commenting, “I’m sure he’s alright, Mike.”

“They should’ve come back by now,” the teen insisted, his brown eyes flicking worriedly to hers. “Something must have happened.”

“He’s just out with his dad, Mike. What could happen?” Max asked, looking up with a raised brow from where she was playing cards with Dustin and Lucas.

Mike shook his head, “You don’t know his dad, Max. He’s… He’s a major asshole. He’s been a dick to Will since elementary school.”

“He’s right,” Lucas said, his lips twisting into a frown as memories came to mind. “He would yell at him, call him all sorts of names. And that was just what he did in front of us.”

El’s face pinched into a look of concern at the information. She knew Lonnie was a sore subject for the Byers family, but she thought perhaps it was just the bitter aftertaste of a bad fight or the awkward hurt that had settled after the divorce. Asking questions wasn’t really an option, she felt as though it wasn’t her place to go digging into old wounds. Not to mention that Will had seemed off for what seemed like days, perhaps even weeks, now.

She now wishes she had learned more about her new family.

Mike stood with a hardened expression and said, “I’m going to go find him.”

“I’ll come with you,” El said, coming up from her spot on the couch as well.

“Do you need us to come with you?” Dustin asked, his head popping up from where he was laying on the floor.

“We should be fine. We’ll radio you if we need help, but stay here in case my mom asks where I am,” Mike said, putting one of the radios into his sweatshirt’s pocket. With that, he and El made their way up the stairs and out of the house.

The sky was overcast with flashes of blue.

No words would be sufficient to describe the way Mike felt as he took in the scene before him. Lonnie lay on the ground, clutching his upper arm as he stared with petrified eyes at Will. His skin looked burned, almost charred, as if struck with a bolt of unbridled energy.

And Will…

Screams of anguish, rage, heartbreak; the cries of one who’s been broken one too many times cut through the air like a razor. His eyes were alight with electric energy, his irises turned dark despite the flashes of neon blue crackling out of them and emanating from the rest of his body as if he were an overpowered battery. The very air around had turned to static, almost burning with the intensity.

One by one, shop windows began to rattle, crack, and break. Street lights flashed in bursts of blinding light, the hum of constant electricity humming through them like a chorus. The sky above them rumbled, almost gurgling on the blue energy being blasted into and out of it. Veins of blue and black danced along Will’s body, a sickening tango of power intermingled with overwhelming grief.

Lonnie screamed, “Fucking monster! He’s a fucking monster!”

Another bolt shot out at Lonnie, but he managed to roll out of the way just in time for it to strike and scorch the ground beside him. The man yelped as he accidentally put pressure onto his injury, his legs scrambling to get him up onto his feet.

El could relate all too well to the scene in front of her. The lack of control, the surge of emotions, feeling as though you had all the power in the world and yet none at all. She looked at Will screaming, sobbing, breaking, and saw herself. She could see the steady stream of crimson pouring from his nose, pouring like a faucet as his body poured his very soul into the outburst around him. It was so familiar, she could almost feel the blood on her own lip.

Willing her voice to be steady, she called out, “Will! It’s me! It’s Eleven!” Screaming broke into choppy outbursts before stopping, as if an old engine were struggling to stop. The scratch and catch in Will’s throat could be heard from where the pair stood. Mike snapped himself from his reverie, following El’s lead, “Will, it’s Mike! Listen, it’s-“

“Do not say it’s going to be okay!” Will rasped, heat and venom seeping through the hurt. “Nothing’s okay now and nothing’s ever going to be fucking okay!” There was a pulse of more intense energy, as if a second kick jolted within the brunette and poured out as even more strands of tangled lightning.

“Will, please, what’s going on? You can tell us. We want to help you!” El continued, brow furrowed as she watched the boy struggle. “But first, you have to calm down!”

“Calm down? Calm down?!” The enraged teen demanded, electricity crackling. “I’ve been told to calm down for the past three years! And it never. Fucking. Helps!” Two more bolts shot out, one striking the brick wall behind him, another striking a lamp post and shattering the bulb with the surge.

“Then tell us what will help!” Mike pleaded, taking a small step forward. “Tell us what you need, Will!”

“It-it,” Will struggled, gripping his hair tightly with white knuckles. “Why do you care? Just-Just stop pretending! Stop acting like I matter to you!”

El shifted toward Will, her hands lowered and body language open. “We’re not pretending! We care about you, Will. All we want is for you to be okay.”

“You want me dead!” Will screamed, though his energy was dipping. “You all wish I had died in that quarry! You all wish I never came back!”

“That’s not true!” Mike said, fire coming back to his voice. “We never wanted to give up on you! Seeing your body coming out of the water, the funeral… It killed us, Will! It killed me!” The crack in the dark haired teen’s voice seemed to dim the intensity of the light coming from Will. “When we found out you were still alive, when El was able to contact you, it meant the world to us. It was… Will, do you remember what I told you that day in the shed? Do you remember what the best decision I ever made was?”

Only the quiet crackling of electricity broke the silence.

“It was becoming your friend, Will,” Mike said, taking two more steps forward. “That decision changed my life for the better. You made my life better, Will. You make all of our lives better. Please, Will, believe me.”

El stepped forward as well, coming closer with small steps as she added, “You help us, Will. You helped me at school, with my homework. You took me to the movies, made us waffles, put up with shopping with me. You took care of me. Let us take care of you.”

With a shuddering breath and a heartbroken tremble, the lighting died away and Will fell forward, angry blue and black veins disappearing as he landed into the gentle and loving arms of his sister and the boy he’s loved in secret for years.

For the first time since 1983, Will Byers felt safe.

#stranger things #stranger things season 4 #will byers #byler #mike wheeler #eleven #el hopper

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ourloveisforthelovely · 5 years ago

Text

To the Ends of the Earth 14

Supernatural

A/n: Supernatural AU. OOC Gabriel. Smut warning

Link to Chapter 13

Pairings: Gabriel x Reader

______

Walking into the garage, you stopped the moment that you saw Dean leaned over Baby. You wanted to get out of the bunker unnoticed. Dean looked up as you threw your handbag into the passenger seat.

“Hey, where are you going?

You turned to your brother.

“On a drive...alone.”

Dean straightened up and wiped his hands on a towel.

“Did Gabriel and yourself have a little tiff or something?”

You rolled your eyes. A little “tiff” was one way to put it. You knew that Gabriel was throwing a lot of his venom at you because of Lucifer but you were not going to put up with it. When your brothers drove you nuts, you didn’t take your frustrations out on Gabriel. Hell, you were practically ready to kill Adam and Gabriel wasn’t the first in your line of fire. That was Adam’s job. Adam caused the problem and he was repeating the rewards of his behavior.

“Yeah, something like that. I won’t be gone long.”

Dean nodded before handing you a revolver that he had hidden in the garage.

“It has angel killing bullets. Before you give me a go-to-hell look it's not for Gabriel. I just want you to be safe if some shit head tries to attack you while you are out.”

You raised an eyebrow before looking back to your brother.

“You aren’t going to give me some kind of lecture about going out on my own?”

Dean shook his head.

“Won’t do me any good anyway. Besides, you’re a good hunter. We both know that. If anything happens, pray to Cas...or that guy you're with. What do you want me to tell him when he stops acting like a baby and wants to know where you are?”

You shrugged.

“Tell him that I went to get milk.”

Dean chuckled. He turned and went back into the house after giving you a wink. Sure, Gabriel would believe that you went to get milk. That was totally believable.

What do I care?

Dean thought with a giggle and went off in search of his third cup of coffee.

You, meanwhile, sped down the dark Kansas streets with the radio blaring. To your surprise, the phone hadn’t rung one time. You figured that Gabriel would have called as soon as you left the bunker. When he didn’t, you shrugged. Maybe he was still off being a baby, as Dean put it.

Being a baby...that was probably a harsh way to put it. The understanding side of your brain kicked in. Seeing Lucifer again had to be a huge kick in the balls for Gabriel. He never said it but you had the feeling that his brother’s departure from heaven still affected Gabriel to this day. The moment that you saw the expression of disappointment in Gabriel’s eyes...you understood everything. The two of you had not sat down and had one conversation in the time that he had returned. It was mostly snide remarks and comments about the other that wasn’t fixing a damn thing.

Your mind went to your own brother, Adam. Since the time that he had come back, the two of you were still not getting along. You sighed. From the moment he “died” you had prayed in some vain hope that he would come back. If Adam could just come back from the dead, you would fix everything that went wrong between the two of you. Now, here you were not fixing a thing.

Granted, not everything was your fault. A lot of it was Adam too. He didn’t want you to be happy with Gabriel. You tried to understand things from Adam’s point of view but you just couldn’t. If the shoes were on the other foot and Adam found some angel girl...you would be happy for him. Clearly, life was too short.

(meanwhile)

Dean stood in the kitchen with a tub of ice cream in his hands. This was the best part of his day!

“Oh ice cream, you have what I need.”

He said gleefully.

“That is just disturbing.”

Dean almost dropped his ice cream the moment that he heard Gabriel’s voice. He spun around to see the archangel staring at him with an expression of disgust on his face.

“Son of a bitch, Gabriel! Can you stop sneaking around here?! I am going to tell Y/n to put a bell around your neck or something! You made me drop my spoon!”

Gabriel shrugged as Dean threw his now dirty spoon in the sink and went in search of another.

“Sneaking is my specialty. Would you like a bowl or something? You are comparable to a caveman.”

Dean snorted.

“Me eating ice cream out of the carton is disturbing to you? I am sure that you have seen a lot worse than me eating ice cream this way.”

Gabriel grinned.

“Oh yes. I have. I destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah without blinking. That was probably a disturbing thing to witness.”

Dean winced. Gabriel had a pretty decent sense of humor but when he got on the holier than thou train; he could get downright righteous.

“Yeah, well…that makes me feel so much better about you dating my sister. I’m glad that you aren’t that archangel anymore.”

Gabriel smirked. He could still be that archangel if he wanted. If he remained with Michael and Raphael (not to mention the other angels that followed him around looking to be “herded”) it would be more than easy to be that angel again. Putting what you were on the back burner wasn’t an easy task.

“Dating is a strong word about what Y/n is to me. I don’t care what people do anymore. Clearly, it doesn’t change a thing. If you aren’t out murdering other humans or being a raging lunatic then do what you will.”

Dean was a little surprised to hear those words come out of Gabriel’s mouth. He didn’t even want to think about the word wife.

“Sounds like you have come a long way in the course of a few months with my sister.”

Gabriel shrugged.

“Maybe it was the finding out that everything my father taught us was a lie. Everything that I knew...isn't right. Anyway, none of that matters now. Where is Y/n? I was an ass to her.”

Dean walked to the refrigerator and put the ice cream back in the freezer.

“She went out. I gave her a gun with angel killing bullets. If anyone messes with her I don’t doubt that my sister will cap their ass.”

Gabriel groaned and disappeared. Dean sighed.

“He’s wasting whatever grace he had built up going after her.”

(back with you)

You flew down a road with music blaring. Tapping your fingers on the steering wheel, you were feeling better by the moment. You had to agree with Dean. Sometimes a nice long drive could fix everything.

Looking ahead, you frowned seeing someone standing in the middle of the road.

“What the fuck?”

You muttered before slamming on your breaks. The person didn’t move as you came to a stop about 6 feet from them.

“Son of a bitch...dumb ass motherfucker needs to use their brain.”

You muttered before getting out of the car.

“Hey! You can’t just be standing in the middle of the road like that, moron. That is how you get killed!”

When the man looked up, you almost screamed. It was Michael. He gave you that dark smile that haunted your nightmares from the first time that you had met him.

“Hello, Y/n.”

You frowned, feeling that surge of nervousness wash over you mixed with a feeling of anger.

“What’s up, sparkles?”

Michael frowned, looking obviously confused.

“What’s up? Sparkles? Is that a greeting?

You chuckled.

“It's the nicest greeting that I could come up with. I think that you should leave, we aren’t nice to archangels in these parts.”

Michael smirked.

“That isn’t what I have been hearing. From what I have heard, you make archangels feel very welcome. Maybe that is why my brother is staying nestled between your harlot legs.”

You scoffed.

“Dude, just say hoe. No one says harlot anymore. Way to make yourself sounds ancient as fuck. Furthermore, Gabriel stays because that is what Gabriel wants. I don’t think that you know your brother as well as you think. Gabriel doesn’t do a damn thing that he doesn’t want to do.”

Michael didn’t smile or make any facial expressions.

“I don’t think that you know my brother as well as you think that you do. Gabriel is not your little play toy. He has a job to do. It's best that you let him go and do it. I don’t care about what imaginary bond that you believe that you have….”

“I saw his wings. You, of all people, know what that means.”

Michael frowned.

“It isn’t possible. My father would never pair one of his sons with a filthy human...especially one of you Winchesters.”

“Jeez, Michael. We aren’t that bad! It sounds like you didn’t know your father that well after all. I am going to make it simple for you. Gabriel and I are together. You and that shit head brother of yours are going to have to find some way to accept it.”

Michael snarled. He raised his hand to snap you out of existence.

“Enough!”

Both Michael and yourself turned to see Gabriel a few feet behind you. Boy, did he look mad! His golden eyes were glowing in fury as he kept his focus on his older brother. You glanced back at Michael, who looked as stunned as you did.

Quickly looking back to your lover, you couldn’t help but worry how long his grace would hold out. If he went completely empty against Michael, neither of you would stand a chance. You put your hand on your side to find the gun that Dean had given you.

“Not yet.”

Gabriel muttered as he wrapped his arms around you. He gave you that little playful smirk that made your knees weak.

“Hey, sugar.”

Gabriel said with a smile. One arm went around your waist while his other hand reached up to cup your cheek.

“Gabriel, stop this!”

Michael snapped. Gabriel glanced over his shoulder to his very angry looking brother. Gabriel laughed coldly before turning his attention back to you.

“Everything will be just fine, sugar.”

He tilted your face to his before leaning down and kissing you. Gabriel could feel the rage going through Michael as he wanted with a sneer on his face.

This kiss was different from the ones the two of you had shared before. Gabriel was more commanding. This was more like kissing the archangel that you read about. You closed your eyes, losing yourself in the moment.

“Gabe…”

You moaned happily in your mind. Gabriel smiled against your mouth as he sucked at your bottom lip. The moment that his wings wrapped around you, you could have come apart in his arms. This was by far one of the most erotic and intimate moments in your relationship and Gabriel wasn’t even inside of you. Maybe it was the fact that he was proving to the chief asshat in charge that your bond wasn’t a joke?

Gabriel was the first to move away. He gave you a small smile before shoving you behind him. Gabriel turned his attention back to Michael, who looked ready to scream.

“Hello, brother.”

Michael’s eyes rolled to his brother’s face.

“You bonded with a human.”

Gabriel nodded before looking a bit annoyed.

“True. Father told me that it would happen thousands of years ago. I didn’t think he was right but look where I am now. If you think for one moment that I am going to sit back and let you lay a hand on her, you are very very wrong.”

Michael growled again.

“Do you see a possibility where this is going to work out? You are both entirely different species. Gabriel, you know what happens when angels fall in love with humans. You were there when we killed the fallen angels that took human wives. Now here you are following in their footsteps. What are you going to do when your whore becomes pregnant? Do you think that I am going to stand by and watch a Nephilim be created?”

Gabriel smiled, coldly.

“There is already one that you don’t know about. Clearly, it wouldn’t affect your stupid ass much.”

Gabriel snapped his fingers sending Michael tumbling backward.

“Don’t you ever call my girl a whore again.”

Michael struggled to stand up. He gave Gabriel an ice-cold glare.

“Gabriel, you are insane. You will both go to hell! I’ll never let you back in heaven again!”

Michael vanished before Gabriel could launch another attack.

Gabriel looked around carefully. Something told him to keep an eye out for Michael. A sneak attack seemed like such a Michael thing to do. When he didn’t show back up, Gabriel turned back to you. He smiled looking at the worried expression on your face. Your green eyes were wide as Gabriel reached out with his wings and pulled you to him.

“Hi princess.”

He said with that shy smile that won your heart in the beginning.

“Hi, darling.”

Gabriel kept his wings around you. Maybe it was to keep you safe from any sneak attacks or to keep your bodies together. At the moment, you didn’t care. You were enjoying every caress that Gabriel had to give you.

“I owe you an apology for earlier.”

Gabriel said with a smirk. He brought your hand to his mouth and pressed a soft kiss to each finger tip.

“It's fine, Gabe. Just so you know, I didn’t come looking for Michael. His stupid ass was just standing in the middle of the road like a moron.”

Gabriel nodded.

“I saw the whole thing. No one said that my brothers were smart.”

Gabriel lowered his mouth back to yours. You wrapped one hand in his leather jacket while the other stroked up his back. The moment that you stroked over his wing joints; Gabriel shivered. He groaned against your mouth and involuntarily rocked his hips into yours.

“You know what I want now.”

He said as his voice deepened a few octaves. You glanced over your shoulder making sure that there were no signs of life.

“We’ve never had sex in the car before.”

Gabriel gave you that devilish little smirk that got him whatever he wanted from you.

“We are about to now.”

He quickly hid his wings before walking to your SUV. Opening the door, he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Come here, princess.”

You didn’t hesitate before quickly joining Gabriel. The moment that you shut the door, you were naked. You quickly looked back to Gabriel, who sat looking at you with that cocky grin. Swallowing, you let your eyes fall down the archangel’s body. The muscles in his chest and stomach tightened as he ran his hand over his hard-on.

“As much as I would love to have that pretty mouth on me; I don’t think that I can wait. Touching my wings like that has turned me into a needy mess. Don’t make me ask you twice to come over here, sugar. I know that you are wet.”

You sat motionless a moment before practically diving on the archangel. He knew exactly how to turn you into a needy wet mess with only a few words. Placing a knee on either side of Gabriel’s body, you took him from tip to base without any regards in adjustments. Gabriel groaned, muttering something in Enochian.

The pressure between your legs intensified as Gabriel used his grace to press down on your clit.

“Gabe, you tease.”

You muttered. Gabriel laughed as he squeezed your ass.

“I should call you a tease for feeling me up in front of my brother. It was hot though.”

You smiled against his mouth as Gabriel increased his pace.

“Would you like to see a new trick?”

You asked, between kisses. Gabriel shook his head.

“If it involves me not being inside of you at the moment then no.”

You shook your head. There was no way that you were about to pull away from your archangel now.

“Oh, sweet boy I am not going anywhere.”

You carefully spread your legs to your side so that you were in a split position. Internally, you thanked Dean for talking you into getting the bigger SUV. This would make for a good thank you note for Dean later!

Gabriel’s eyes flashed bright gold as he went deeper, if possible. You clenched your eyes closed as his cock pressed firmly against your cervix. Rocking your hips, you enjoyed every deep thrust that Gabriel had to give you. You leaned down and pressed your mouth to his neck. Gently biting down, you felt Gabriel’s cock twitch.

“Put your wings out.”

You moaned softly against his neck. Gabriel whimpered “lord help me” in Enochian before fulfilling your request. Reaching behind Gabriel, you wrapped your hands around his wing joints. The moment that you gently yet firmly pressed down, Gabriel’s torso lifted from the seat. His arms wrapped around your body. He pulled you as tightly to him as possible.

Gabriel slammed his hips upward. His thrusts became deeper and more frantic. Your head fell backward with each perfectly timed thrust.

“Gabriel!”

You whimpered his name making the archangel moan.

“Sweetheart, don’t stop. Keep messing with my wings! Don’t stop.”

Gabriel whispered the last “don’t stop” knowing that there was no way that he was going to be able to hold on much longer.

You stroked your hand up his spine continuing the assault on his wing joints. To say that you were pleased with all of the desperate moans that Gabriel was making was an understatement. Normally, he liked to be in control but today it was different. Today, you were fulfilling one of his darkest dirtiest fantasies.

“Harder, Y/n, Pull harder! I need to come.”

Gabriel groaned. You wrapped your hands around one of his wings before tugging. Gabriel buried his face in your neck and bit down. The moment that your body tightened around his, Gabriel couldn't hold on any longer. He came hard inside of you as he bit down once more.

“Not done.”

Gabriel muttered as he increased his pace to fuck you through his own orgasm.

“Come for me, pretty girl. I want to feel you come apart. I filled you up now come for me, sugar.”

Gabriel slammed his hips into yours once more. Between the pressure on your womb and Gabriel’s erotic whispering; you came hard.

You were so lost in the moment that you didn’t feel Gabriel ease out of you. He gently pulled you into a lying position so you were snuggled on top of him and against his chest. Gabriel stroked his hand through your hair as you came down from your high.

“You okay?”

He asked, softly. You nodded, feeling unable to speak for the moment. Everything was perfect for the moment. You lay snuggled against his body having no will to move. If you didn’t feel so thoroughly fucked, you could ask Gabriel to make love to you again. His cock was still hard against your stomach, making your own core twitch.

“I’m perfect.”

You finally managed to say in a soft voice. Gabriel chuckled and leaned down to kiss your head.

“I think that you’ve given me a wing kink. That was intense.”

You giggled, moving your legs to adjust in the back seat of the SUV. Gabriel didn’t even have to tell you that it was intense. You could feel the results of your love making leaking down your thighs.

Closing your eyes, you wanted to savor the moment as much as you could. The next few moments were quiet and peaceful. As you began to drift off in Gabriel’s arms, you began to think about Michael’s comments about Nephilim. Gabriel and Michael had killed other angels for making Nephilim. Raphael’s comment about Gabriel having a “villainous side” came back to mind. Would he take that villainous side out on you if something did happen?

“Gabe, what happened with the whole Nephilim thing?”

Gabriel’s body tightened underneath yours. The hand that was stroking yours stopped in mid-motion.

“I think that you know that answer to that, Y/n.”

Gabriel said, idly. You slowly sat up and perched yourself on Gabriel’s waist. The archangel groaned as your wetness pressed against his still hard cock.

“I don’t know anything. Gabriel...what if…”

Gabriel’s eyes opened. He gave you that scowl that told you he was getting annoyed.

“If what?”

You looked around as if looking for someone overhearing the conversation at hand. Suddenly, you felt very naked and vulnerable. It didn’t matter that you had the most passionate, mindblowing sex ever! It also didn’t matter that Gabriel has seen you naked hundreds of times. You felt like a bug under his unblinking gaze.

“What is going to happen if I get pregnant?”

Gabriel shifted his arm underneath his head. He didn’t look the least bit worried or concerned with your sudden fear.

“It isn’t going to happen.”

You frowned. Here came the archangel.

“I’m sure the other angels thought the same thing before their lovers got pregnant too.”

Gabriel’s golden eyes narrowed.

“I said that it isn’t going to happen. Now get off of me, woman.”

You quickly did as you were told before Gabriel pushed you off. The expression on his face alone told you that he was absolutely livid!

What you didn’t know was Gabriel was internally panicking! He had been pretty good about making sure any unplanned pregnancies didn’t happen. The last thing that he wanted was to be creating a Nephilim that he would have to spend the rest of forever protecting. His mind went to Jack for a moment. His nephew was a good kid but he wasn’t Gabriel’s responsibility. You were his responsibility and anything childlike that came out of you would be his responsibility. Gabriel wasn’t strong enough to be protecting a nephilim at the moment. The night’s activities had drained him of what grace he had recharged.

“You definitely didn’t do a damn thing to protect her just now.”

Gabriel’s mind supplied. He mentally kicked himself when he thought about the sex the two of you just had. This had been the most sensual not to mention intimate sex ever and he didn’t think one bit about stopping a damn thing.

You, meanwhile, had already redressed. Gabriel sighed, looking at you. You were upset and it was his fault. Again, his temper had gotten the better of him. This time it was for good reason. Gabriel was not meant to be a father. Being bonded to you was the most that was meant to happen!

Gabriel sighed, thinking back about the Nephilim situation from the past. You didn’t have to be a part of that nightmare, Gabriel did. This was before God told Gabriel about his own future with a human wife. Gabriel didn’t care then. Now he wasn’t so sure...

Gabriel stood behind Michael as he stared down the fallen angels and their wives. He knew the expression on their faces...fear. It was painfully obvious that the beings in front of him were scared for their lives. Maybe not only their lives individually but the lives of the family that they had created. Gabriel wanted to feel sorry for them but he couldn’t. They had broken the rules. Rule breakers had to be punished and this was one of the most deadly and dangerous rules to break!

As Michael went on and on about the rules that the angels before them broke; Gabriel focused on their pitiful expressions. Right away, Gabriel noticed an angel that he never expected to go rogue standing before him. Eli looked petrified (and with good reason. Gabriel thought). The woman at his side clung a small toddler. The child looked around, not understanding what was going on or his parent’s fear.

“You’re all going to die for breaking one of heaven’s most clear rules. Angels and humans do not mix. Creating what you all have created is wrong….it's an abomination and a sin against nature.”

Michael said, coldly. Eli focused his attention to Gabriel. The archangel was his leader against the darkness. If anyone could save him and his family, it would be Gabriel.

“Gabriel, please…please do something.”

Gabriel’s sullen expression didn’t change as he looked at his subordinate.

“You know heaven's laws. They aren’t here for some of us to follow and some of us not to. Regardless of your affiliation with me, you know the punishment.”

Michael turned to Gabriel with a pleased smile.

“Take care of the problem.”

Gabriel nodded. He didn’t give Eli another chance to speak before waving his hand and the whole group in front of him vanished with a pained scream...

Gabriel pulled himself from the memory before turning to look at you. You had already started driving back toward the bunker silently. Gabriel sighed. He knew that his temper had won again. You wanted the truth. You deserved the truth....

“Look at that...I have fallen too.”

________

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