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#head full of thoughts tonight
stellocchia · 29 days
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I think Killer would really enjoy community theater.
Killer struggles properly dealing with and understanding his own emotions, so I think that getting to act them out while putting a certain distance between himself and them (because the story isn't his no matter how much it may resonate with him) could serve him well.
Plus, with community theater he doesn't have to worry about massive crowds and performing perfectly, so I think it would work better for him than something more professional. He's already been in the spotlight enough while working as Nightmare's right hand man.
Also, I think having some kind of creative outlet would be good for him. He needs something that is entirely detached from the violence and strict utilitarianism he was used to when he got treated as a tool.
I think Color would encourage it.
I don't think he would be the one to get the idea. I like the idea of Killer seeing a small performance and being absolutely enamoured with it. So much so that it's clear he'd like to be up there on the stage. He wouldn't ask because he'd be afraid of judgment for wanting to try and do something so frivolous when there are so many AUs to help and so much damage to undo, but it would be obvious to anyone that knows him that he'd want that.
I think Color would go check it out himself so he can show Killer that it's alright in a way that he'll understand. Because if Color thinks it's worth "wasting time" on something like this, well, maybe it is.
Perhaps they'd do it together at the start, but I don't really think it would be Color's passion long term. Perhaps if Dust is there and it's one of those AUs where MTT have escaped Nightmare together, he'd join. I don't think he'd be as passionate about it as Killer is, but he'd definitely find some catharsis in it. It could be a good way for him to work through his guilt.
Also, this could be a great way for both Killer and Dust to find friends outside of the small circle they're either trauma bonded with or fully reliant on for emotional support. And that's rather important as well
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plaidpyjamas · 9 months
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can't get the idea of trans Astarion out of my head hhhh
thinking about how he'd shiver if Tav kissed his chest, right over his surgery scars
thinking about how much his legs would shake as Tav goes down on him, buring their face between his legs for what feels like h o u r s
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acoraxia · 7 months
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My knowledge of fyss!Kui Mulang is not the best because since the fyss version is in English and the book is extra dense with many characters with different names, it has not been easy for me. I know more about Jttw!Kui Mulang. Jttw is easier for me because there is a version in my native language. But about Kui Mulang and his wife, Kui Mulang kidnapped his wife against her will. He also does not hesitate to hurt her If she does something agaisnt him. Furthermore, the moment Kui Mulang is caught, he betrays his wife and tries to put all the blame on her, saying that she was the one who seduced him.
Many fsyy characters have different names. So I think that's why not many recognize Azure Lion. He was part of the Jie Sect but is later turned into a mount when he loses. I think lmk is not taking fsyy as a prequel to Jttw like New gods. However, I feel like it gives more depth to his character? You know, imagine fighting on the side that accepts you because the other side doesn't really like your kind (from what I understand, there may be good reasons as well as discrimination against the Yaoguai) and then you're humiliated into being the mount of an immortal. And many centuries pass, and you gain respect and connections, but they still don't see you anymore than that. He also becomes very angry when he is not invited to Xiwangmu's peach banquet. I'm not saying this to defend him, but the topic of the Yaoguai and how they are perceived is interesting.
this person is answering questions about fsyy. It's the only blog I've found, so they might be able to give you the info you want to know about fsyy!Kui Mulang. I hope it helps you a lot if you ever need it! :)
https://www.tumblr.com/ryin-silverfish
I'm sorry if I send a lot of asks to reply. I tried to send a response to my ask but apparently my reply is too long??? I'm still not very familiar with Tumblr
Checked my inbox after me and my sib discussed media and honestly it made my mood go from “aw” to “OOOH” so quickly haha
Fyss!Kui Mulang will remain a mystery for a while… we gotta accept this fate my friends. At least until I do a little digging and end up launching him on top of my faves like I did with Erlang and Red Son— AHEM anyways!
I did not know he tried to victim blame his wife.. what the HECK dude… what is wrong with you… my guy.. my dude! What the heck!
Also Yaoguai were always very interesting imo… like at some point it makes you wonder if the hate and judgement they get is justified or not. Yes there are yao that eat people or kill them and do things that aren’t great but what of the ones that are just living? The ones who fight on the side of “good”? Makes you wonder about it. (I did learn that yaoguai stands for creatures that stand outside the natural order/cannot be explained. Which is fun!) Kind of interesting how he was turned into a mount… hm. That’s.. certainly something! Especially for a sentient being capable of thought and speech as eloquent as any other immortal he comes across!
I kind of wish they’d taken fyss as an inspiration ngl.. they did show the Nezha and Ao Bing fight scene but it was obviously shown as more aggressive (in the book, Nezha just smacked him while Ao Bing was the one who launched the first attack—meant to he comedic but also horrifying moment for the Ao family) and it’s funny how they introduced Nü Wa.. because they’ll have to address which version of her it is (in some myths she is the Jade Emperor’s daughter (fyss iirc), in other’s she marries her brother—options!) —but! Anyways, this was a fun read
Definitely makes me think about Azure Lion and Kui Mulang’s characterizations… hm hm hm
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pissfaggit · 1 year
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Found this from when I needed a picture of John seeing Earth for the first time when he accidentally goes back and I was gonna post it making fun of the 0 thoughts nothingness behind his eyes but you know what I take it back a thousand times I take it back I'm so sorry for real. There is untold depths of emotion present here in his goofy fucking face. Far too much for a simple man such as myself to comprehend
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pepprs · 2 years
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hi update things are fucking terrible and my eyes hurt from sobbing. lol
#purrs#delete later#not to liveblog and be tmi or whatever but i feel terribly alone and terribly miserable so this is in fact a cry for help lol. or really#comfort bc im fucking going insane. so for context last spring when i was still an intern another intern orchestrated this back channel#where everyone was supposed to talk shit about our supervisors (my dearest most belovedest mentors) and all of us hid it for months and it#all came to a head at asb 2022 because there was a lot of drama witb the asb student facilitators and our staff team. and it was sooooo ugly#and messy and horrible and probably played a direct role in one of my dearest beloved est mentors (who was the point person for asb) fucking#getting a new job and abandoning us in july lol 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 and so i became a full time staff member and me and my remaining dearest belovedest#colleague besties fucking carried the world on oh r shoulders and put on amazing programs as just 3 of us in the core staff and we thought w#we were doing a really good job with the asb 2023 leaders and that there were no drama dynamics or whatever and guess fucking what. tonight#we found out that half of them hate us for reasons we still don’t know and all of them are at each others throats and also some of the#participants feel a type of way about us. and i know i am being a fragile sensitive crybaby over it but i have had terrible cramps all day a#and have barely slept since ive been here and feel like ive been bending over backwards to support the leaders only to find out that half of#them think we’re evil and i just… i couldn’t take it. so i cried and now im beating myself up for crying. but it’s like come ON. i know we#did a pretty imperfect job of preparing them for this. and i should just take responsibility for that and not be defensive. but it’s like… i#have NEVER seen this program in person before or been part of the planning of it. i was just a student last year like all of you. and also#HOW many fucking times did we create space for you to talk to us and invite us in. and still this shit happened. and i just feel like a#failure. and i couldn’t react to that information in any way except cry liek it’s all so over my head and out of my depth and im not as#emotionally mature as my colleagues bc im the youngest and this is my first time dealing with this and i feel so incompetent and like i#failed. failed the first time by not speaking up when i was implicated in the stupid fucking Google form back channel situation last year#and now failed the second time by not being able to prevent this stupid drama bullshit from happening again and for not catching it. and jfs#like… im in excruciating physical pain and haven’t slept and haven’t eaten well and my life is falling apart and we were ABANDONED BY THE#PERSON WHO WAS RESPONDIBLE FOR THIS (i know we weren’t abandoned she literally just got a new job i just have psychological issues) and#we’ve been running at a million miles per hour with absolutely no break and now you’re mad at us and not even telling us and it’s impacting#everyone’s experiences but you want to pretend this is fucking high school and keep secrets. i am TIRED of drama. i am TIRED of this stupid#bullshit. and not to say this bc i don’t know if asb 2022 drama factored into her decision to leave but if it did i get why * left now. i#get it. bc this shit makes me want to jump out the hotel window. i do not want to face any of them tomorrow and deal with more bullshit. i#am emotionally unstable and incompetent and not equipped to deal with this in a mature healthy way. i want this to be over NOW. im done.#ok i think that’s it um. sorry about that i just needed other people to know i am suffering and i will suppress the shame i feel about that#just this once. esp bc i denied myself the opportunity for my colleague besties to comfort me while i was crying and i regret it now lol
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bcneheaded · 8 months
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artemis + inebriation spell from a disatisfied powerful entity that was unable to HARM artemis due to his Non Violence charm he has on his shop (safe point like in games jgjfgdf) but resorted to something just inconvenient and probably would sully his reputation ever so slightly.... petty karen entities be like anyway your muse coming to the shop ... wondering why its closed so early (... the word early is relative esp because his shop is almost ALWAYS open--) so they go in and end up essentially taking care of this millennia old demon under a drunken spell
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scionshtola · 1 year
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anyway here is my unofficial list of fave alliance raids from each series
syrcus tower
dun scaith
ridorana lighthouse
tower at paradigm's breach
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Finally watched the new sonic prime episode and my brain is ensnared by so many thoughts and theory’s Im
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SO!
Pretty good show honestly. I think it may perhaps come off a little underwhelming compared to last time because they released the full trailers early, so it was chiefly just talking, but I was still pleased.
The only thing I really wanted out of it was one (1) of my predictions coming true and one (1) surprise, and well, between the Watase Family and Nishitani...... THREE!!!!!, that's exactly what I got. Kiryu looking up at the sky like he's struggling to remember who he (allegedly) proposed to is hilarious though same energy as Jo not remembering Ikumi's name ghdshgkdhf the exchange kind of reminded me of Ichi talking to Arakawa as well... the "don't say it in the past tense" one you know the one...
Also next summit in September so that'll be a lovely birthday present :) For Me :)
Also x2 I love seeing which of my asks you decide to reblog. Whether it's because of the actual ask or because of my commentary it always feels like a win (<- normal to want and possible to achieve)
even if Considerably underwhelming, what information's been given IS causin a lotta buzz right now so !!! pretty successful summit in some regards ( ❁´◡`❁;;)
i just wish we got to see LAD8 gameplay, that's probably the only thing i really wanted but i guess there is still the fall summit (and for your birthday's sake i hope it's a real banger one)!
#snap chats#BEEN TRYING TO REPLY TO THIS ONE FOR LIKE HALF AN HOUR NOW IM SO SORRY VLEKVKJ#i was still on the call with my friend so i couldnt think straight and i wanted to give this my full attention when responding#anyway. i dont think i have to say anything about the conversation between ichi and kiryu#mostly cause ive already been doin that with the other asks huh ☠️#DEFINITELY probably The Main Attraction to everyone tonight... so mysterious... def leavin me confused LMAO#but SO true love how ichi freely assumes arakawa was bangin back in the day but with kiryu he's like Oh God Prob Not#and i mean. is he entirely wrong ☠️#which is what makes kiryu's response all the more funnier 'been around the block' at max you got three girls#one of them arguably being your sister and the other was a mole and the other one yall separated on agreed terms#WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT SIR. he caught on proposing cause he wasnt ever with anyone long enough TO propose ☠️☠️#AH AND i actually like most- if not all- the asks you answer if that's anything :)#my main's shadowbanned so it probably doesnt show up but i always do enjoy reading your commentary or responses to people#i feel awkward rbing asks since For Some Reason in my head that's. Illegal#but sometimes there ARE topics i really wanna leave a comment or ramble bout for one reason or another#absolutely flattered it's considered a win tho cause thats how i feel whenever i see you like or rb any of my posts fjaLKJLKJA#cause yk... in a general sense im very bland or just outright foolish SO it's always cool when you enjoy my posts ♪(´▽`)#esp when theres so much love and thought in yours- its very cool is what i can say in the Utter Most Simplest of terms#terms i have to use cause my hands starting to hurt from all the typing owie ow ow ow(;´x`)#ill leave with saying HOPEFULLY for the next summit i can stream it... my mic worked well with my call with my friend SO#it's def ready for. whatever i got in store ok my hand REALLY hurts now i gotta cap it (;´д`)
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pa-stella · 2 years
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My mind refuses to let me write so I'm creating cursed things instead.
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My aunt gifted me with laoganma crispy chili flakes, so excuse me while i go and eat like a freaking king
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musical-chick-13 · 2 years
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...That...sure was a reveal wasn’t it.
#Idk I feel like this example of 'mental illness plaguing my mind so it inspires me to hurt others because I see life as inherent suffering'#was done a lot better and a lot less overtly ableist than most examples#kind of like...it wasn't saying that having The Brain Disease is inherently Evil™ but more...lending context to the character's worldview?#I think it helps that as soon as he realizes that he's not changing anything and that there's a flaw in his logic he gets better#like he backtracks and apologizes and tries to help people in earnest#but I'm also just kind of...Idk do we really NEED another story where a mentally ill person is harming people because of their illness?#is that in and of itself an ableist trope?? I don't know!!! I am conflicted in this Chili's tonight!!!!! and by Chili's I mean my room with#a giant tub of ice cream I had delivered to me!!!!!!!!!#mc13 watches anime#but then again I don't consider my icon aka best character of all time to be an ableist stereotype for the reason of 'mental illness is not#why she's bad. she's bad because she chooses to be' and 'it makes her sympathetic and isn't some 'Inherent Reason Why She's Evil'#so obviously it can be done. and I think it's counterproductive to say that we can never write villains with mental illness at all#I also think. in this case. it's important to note that EVERYONE is a pretty bad person and none of the OTHER bad people are called 'crazy'#or referenced as being mentally ill in any way. it's literally this one person and he's the most fleshed out out of all of them?#so it's like. is my discomfort because I'm tired of seeing mentally ill Bad People in fiction due to Personal Issues or is this particular#instance an actual example of the 'demonization' problem#MANY THOUGHTS HEAD FULL (distressed)#the real horror was the ableism we found along the way
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siofra-river · 2 years
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Hrmmmgghhghh..elden ring
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omoghouls · 2 years
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How we feeling tonight gamers oughuhgough
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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PEOPLE ARE SO INTERESTING
#🌙.rambles#hi 2 am rambles but tonight i am loving life#dear diary (lol) i am tired n i have lost a lot of energy after this very good day n i will sleep soon#bro idk what i'm writing rn i just ate a cookie n thought about people#cookie.... i am so full rn it's a big cookie 😭😭 it's so delicious though. i really want to learn how to bake someday#but i wonder. i was wondering how you all perceive me here#bcs looking at a mix of who i am in discord. tumblr. twitter. spotify. all those have differences imo#discord you'd see the way i text with others? the things i share. the things i send. the words i say#personally for me reflecting on the things i often say to ppl n it serves as a reaffirmation honestly that i genuinely am kind at heart#i love telling others kind things. that makes me happy. saying good morning n good night n take care n sleep well n rest well#i just find it so interesting. everything. i think about so much things in life on a daily basis#and if anyone were to really. reach close enough to the deepest parts of me#there's a lot of pain definitely but i think someone would see a girl filled with so much love for life#i'm getting off-topic but god i am constantly so confused n lost but i still am strong. i'm proud of who i am. of my mindset#i love who i am. i love the things i desire. and the way i work towards my goals#and not just me. for everyone else. i'm gna cry#i already am 🥹 it often hurts bcs i'm really so. i feel very deeply#so when i. when i struggle n feel so alone it hurts me so much because at times it gets so hard to break out of that even tho i know better#there's so much to love about life but there's so little time too#maybe in my head i can be a little too idealistic at times but. at the same time i know i've gone through so much pain already#that feeling of betrayal. of being forgotten. left behind. god i'm crying even more remembering about all those nights#so. as long as i hold unto myself. unto everything i have ever loved. that will spur me onwards. that i may forge ahead unto tomorrow#the same things i analyze of myself like. the things i said at first here. i think of everyone else as well#how would it be like to live life through your own eyes? with your thoughts and experiences and emotions?#you see. there's really so much to life. and that's what i always remember when i feel like dying#like genuinely i have. felt so. down and sad that i have thought about it. wishing i could just. but i don't want. anyone to worry#my love for the people in my life kept me going when i hated myself so much#god n i. i'm crying so much wait. that's why i want to give so much kindness to others too#i'm crying. i love the night so much bcs i love being open and authentic like this so much but most of the time i get afraid honestly
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taiinted-a · 2 years
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List of random facts about Morgan. 
He never has a bath without adding a black cherry bath bomb to it and combines it with strawberry bubble bath. This is why his skin always smells of fruit, coupled with a subtle hint of sulfur, which never goes away. He has baths on weekends and takes showers for the rest of the week. 
He places red tea light candles around the tub before getting in. 
The places you can find Morgan, other than his apartment, place of work are: a park, forests, libraries, art galleries, dark alleyways late at night, coffee shops, bars, the gym, helping stray cats, game shops, the cinema, exploring old places that are claimed to be haunted, bayous/ swamps. 
Morgan has a high body temperature and feels like a human shaped radiator. This means he can wear summer clothes in the middle of winter.
Always eats a punnet of strawberries for breakfast.
He loves ducks and will always stop at the duck pond whenever he is at the park, but his absolute favorite bird is a magpie.
He collects rubber ducks and snow globes. 
He hates the sound of ticking clocks, high heels clicking on wooden floors, hibiscus flowers, all of these  lead him to having flashbacks about his mother. 
He is color blind, but is able to see red, blacks, browns and whites. Any other color looks grey to him. This is why he tends to wear clothes in red and black.
He is a goth. 
His style is described as a mixture of grunge and Gothic. 
His favorite types of weather are rainy days, foggy nights, cold crisp mornings where you can see your breath. 
You will always find him eating candied toffee apples throughout October. 
Has a soft spot for reptiles. The same thing can be said for cats. 
Always stops to give money to a homeless person he sees on the street.
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