#he's on my shift tonight
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comphet is going to be the death of me T-T
it's clawing at my neck trying to convince me that i have a crush on my co-worker... like. shawty, what?
"he offered to help you clean up a spill !!"
"he told you to come to him if you had any questions !!"
"he gave you some of his nuggets from chick fil a !!"
okay maybe you've got a point ... NO- leave me aloneeee please T-T i get it, we're desperate, leave him out of this
#hello i need you to sedate me#he's on my shift tonight#i'm so sick of myself#there is literally no explanation for this#someone assassinate me#i will no doubt embarrass myself tonight#comphet#queer#doublestandardlove
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I hate that they gave Sam a stupid reason for hating Halloween (he embarrassed himself at a Halloween party) when his initial reason for hating Halloween, that his life FUCKING SUCKED was a much better reason
Like he had an alcoholic father that was lost in his grief and who didn’t try to make anything special for him and his brother never mind the holiday that happens 2 DAYSSSS before the anniversary of his wife’s death
Like he says it himself. He doesn’t care about Christmas or Halloween. He never trick or treated. They had kfc for Christmas. His first experience of a family holiday was with someone else’s family. No one ever cut the crusts of his sandwiches!!!!
Like dean sees Halloween and horror movies and dressing up as escapism. Halloween was probably his fav for the opportunity to escape his life for a night and get free treats that he wouldn’t usually get.
Sam sees holidays as depressing reminders of how shitty his life is 💯
#the image of dean and Sam in make shift costumes and dean is so happy to be running door to door getting all the sweets he wants and there’s#a black and white horror movie marathon happening tonight and they actually get that channel at the motel they r staying at and everything#that is usually so big and scary is fun and playful for just one night#like dean 💕💕💕#meanwhile for Sam is just empty cuz it’s just another time they’re alone and John never bothered to show up and when they go back to the#motel they’re gonna be alone and he hates his life so much and he’s so lonelyyyy#oh my god he was so lonely 😭😭😭
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Not a bad get from work's sample sale the other day tbh 😌
#ore no kao#also ending up with <6hrs of sleep tonight after sleeping in this weekends 😩#fun hang for a friend's bday; watched some older good snl/onion vids before HOTD (which i don't really watch but i'm here for camaraderie)#and now work in the morn 😴#(also cute friend from wed's date thanked me for holding his umbrella for next time and said he had a great time#but hasnt replied to my texts thursday saying i liked exploring our chemistry and that i was thinking of kissing him again#or from yday hoping he's had a good few days and that i feel bad for still having his umbrella given how it's poured this weekend#[he'd left it in our bathtub to dry as we fooled around but the roomie was in there as it got late and he left lol]#he's working two jobs and has 12-hr shifts fridays and sats so i'm hoping it's nothing but a little surprising for how well wed night went#and it would be nice to see him more so i guess we'll see)#(for dates and also getting to suck him again 😩)
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so there's a reason my new job got back to me so quickly about my application and that's bc it's an absolute fucking shambles like actually perfect timing for me to decide to rewatch the bear bc i have never more felt like ive been thrown into a broke on-its-knees establishment trying to crawl its way up the ladder where i am somehow a godsend to them. my old job was crazy and shambolic in the sense that the industry is just Like That but this one?????? insanity. every 5 mins i am questioning what im doing with my life. ive already had a walk-in fridge moment
#so i explained before that there's 3 venues and on my very first shift they had me doing the restaurant venue for 2 hours#which was FINE like i was a bit cautious bc my manager is VERY stressed all the time and the place generally feels like it's falling apart#not the building itself just. the way it's run like it's just got new owners and the previous manager apparently#EMPTIED THE TILLS AND TRASHED THE PLACE like cost them THOUSANDS of pounds and on top of that#there was beef with the head chef and the new owners that meant he left and took the ENTIRE BACK OF HOUSE WITH HIM#THERE ARE NO KITCHEN STAFF ATM. I HAVE TO LIE AND TELL CUSTOMERS WE DONT HAVE FOOD ATM BC OF 'REFURBISHMENT'#WHEN IN ACTUALITY THE /RESTAURANT/ DOESNT HAVE CHEFS. DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT IS#and then the front of house staff are very lacking aside maybe 2 people we're ALL NEW and all of them EXCEPT ME#LIKE LITERALLY JUST ME IM THE ONLY EXCEPTION. ALL OF THEM ARE UNTRAINED#so when i applied with bar training coffee training and very solid waitressing skills they genuinely treated me like a saviour#like i am FENDING off shifts tbh im in a v good position bc they need me too much to get shitty w me if i refuse hours but i can literally#have as many as i want bc they will just give me them. like they're obsessed w me im rota'd for over 60 hours this week#but anyway that very first shift after 2 hours in the restaurant i then walked to the mini golf venue on the OTHER SIDE OF TOWN#and my manager stayed for 30 MINUTES. IF THAT. and showed me around the place + how to close THEN LEFT ME THERE#FIRST DAY HE GAVE ME THE KEYS AND LEFT ME TO RUN AN ENTIRE VENUE. IT'S NOT SMALL EITHER IT'S A WHOLE BAR#AND I HAD TO CLOSE ON MY OWN TOO and ironically the shift itself went rlly well like it was so chill#it was kinda boring but honestly i kinda rated it it's v easy money and the close went perfectly nothing cropped up that i was unsure about#and then. AND THEN. i havent even ranted to my mutuals about this yet bc i was acc so horrified by it but i locked the front doors#and went to lock the gate AND THE KEY GOT STUCK IN THE LOCK. WOULD NOT COME OUT. HELLA VS KEYS ROUND 3927593#my mum even showed up and tried to help me wrestle this thing out i called my manager and he literally told me to just snap it#bc he'd rather a snapped key that NO ONE could get out than just leave it there overnight but bc of my recent house key moment#i was like AM I FUCK SNAPPING THIS KEY. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING. so i had to just leave it and at the time#i was realllyyyyyyyyyy beating myself up but my manager is actually rlly nice he's just stretched v thin#and ive also had time to be like uhh actually they shouldnt have left a random 21 y/o girl alone with the keys on her first day#omg i havent even talked about what happened on saturday. ACTUAL SHAMBLES#LIKE THIS /\/\ ISNT EVEN CLOSE TO EVERYTHING! IM RUNNING OUT OF TAG ROOM! IM GONNA REBLOG THIS TONIGHT W MORE PROBABLY!#BC GUESS WHO IS WORKING A CLOSE LATER AT THE NIGHTCLUB THEN OPENING THE RESTAURANT AT 8AM. GUESS#hella slaves to capitalism
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One thing I really like about Scythe Audios is that he makes really good fighting scenes! I was listening to some of his stuff while working and I really like his vids where there's a lot of fighting and playful banter. I got a good few chuckles listening to his supervillain series, I think he does a really swell job at getting into character and you can tell he's having fun with them too which adds to the experience in my opinion. I'm only just now going through his audios on YouTube and I'm excited!
#audio rp#audio roleplay#simplytalks#He's very fun to listen to and has made my shift bareable tonight lol#scythe audios
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If I had a nickel for every time my dad and to go to hospital for: choking on a piece of meat during a post golf meal
I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot yadda yadda but damn dude how do you get a piece of steak crammed that far down in your oesophagus??
#this time seems less pressing (despite being air lifted from country hospital to the royal) because he can still breath#but its pretty jammed in there and he can't swallow so will have to wait all day for endoscopy to have a look at it#and play the worst version of a claw machine game people have#last time he was all weezing and stuff because it was obstructing airway#when i saw the message the first thing i was worried about was managing my behaviour so the fam (mostly my sister) dont get mad at me#if he died i would be sad in the way people frightened of their own mortality are#not sad in the grieving and miss him way#and i dont think my siblings realise how little i like him#anyway hes not dying and will be fine but it really shifts the mood this weekend and also means mama is not moving house today#and im pretty sure i can still go to a gig tonight (hes fine. i cant do anything anyway)#but i think my sister will go off if i ask to be sure
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wip while i'm at woooork~
#i couldn't get the idea of kara & kuro singing karaoke together...#kuro would hate going to karaoke & singing in front people bc of how tone deaf they are#( they had a bad experience going to karaoke in college and just hasn't really gone since )#but they'd like going with karamatsu bc he doesn't care that they suck at singing & finds ways to make it fun for them#like picking goofy songs and going all out in singing them so it make kuro laugh#he likes their laugh. not just light one they usually do but the full on cackle that comes out when something's really funny to them#* puts my face in my hands * good lord......#i'm feeling so soft about them rn i'm sorry#hopefully i can work back into this tomorrow after my shift#tonight i'm just gonna try working on finishing writing the outline for the first kurokara lore event i'm gonna post#i wanna doodle some things for it so i might take me a sec to post tho#mj wips#mj rambles
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how to tell my manager that closing up shop by myself makes me have seriously bad delusions about the store getting robbed and me getting killed while counting money without him going "oh you just lack confidence ^_^" or "wait youre schizophrenic?? gross...i dont want you hired here anymore........"
#hazy rambles#schizophrenia#delusions#paranoia#no seriously i hate!!! this!! im loathing this shift tonight omfg#also i know the latter is like. work discrimination and he cant do that#but im sure he can fire me due to my 'performance' rather than my mental illness
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how do i make myself unattractive to all men forever
#i seriously cant man#so recently ive had a few conversations at work with this one dude right#and hes chill we got a few things in common#and yesterday he asked for my ig and for some reason mine wasnt popping up#so i just gave him my phone so i could follow his acc#tell me why this man added himself as a contact to ym phone without asking and texted me after my shift#and then tonight he sent me the fuckin two eyes lookin to the side emoji after i didnt reply to his last message at 11 pm#keep in mind hes 32#idk i just hate when dudes flirt w me bc it makes me feel so nauseous and uncomfortable like STOP LOOKING AT MEEEEEE#its probably just bc im a flaming lesbian BUT STILL!!! HOW DO I STOP THIS!!! I HATE IT it makes me feel so sick everytime#then i feel bad but at the same time leave me aloneeeee bruh
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you know who wouldn't pull his writing punches? brian clarke from the mortuary assistant. he would never do me like this
#he said My Most Popular Character Will Victimize You. And Others.#and through that we will get an endlessly intriguing story about control and cycles of abuse. about patterns of addiction.#god#im in my feelings tonight about what this game (datv) could've been#and ik there are plenty of people who genuinely have no problem with the writing#but if i can be so mean for a second i'm like. ik you only consume children's media. ofc you're happy with it.#and it's not even just the writing i feel like the music has a lot to do with the tone shift#it's one thing to have bel throw a goofy fit when she can't get the nadas dirthalen to work#it's another for it to have quirky flutes and jaunty strings playing a real children's fantasy backdrop for it
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#how my night is going#yes I'm still here 1.5 hours after shift change#yes he did remove the NG i placed#even with soft restraints on#and I'm back tonight#🥲#nursing#nursing memes#nurse life#medical humor
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AUGH i got home and dothcat immediately went to his food dish...I fed him at like 6:45 this morning and he didn't eat until i got home like twelve hours later 😩
#don't do this to me little man!!#i think he's just upset that my roommate is out of town so he was alone all day.. normally there's someone home at least part of the day#i had a long shift yesterday too so i guess it's fair#but at least I'll be home more this weekend!!#well at least he's eaten now and seems to be keeping it down#I'll just have to feed him later tonight so he gets all his meds#he wouldn't cuddle with me last night either :(
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i need eddie to get another guy friend in season 8, and buck loses his shit about it (again), so he breaks up with t because he's convinced that the weird feeling he gets when he sees them together is because he is Really attracted to the new guy.
#like things with t are fine cuz he likes exploring this new side of himself even if t doesnt always match his energy but whatever its fun#and maybe at work chim is the one who brings up eddies new friend and he is immediately just. what new friend?#chim laughs and says. tbf last time eddie got a new friend you attacked him so you could date his friend. hes probably keeping it to himsel#and bucks like. dude what. that was. yeah it was shitty of me but it was a one time thing. i wont do it again...#and when eddie shows up for shift buck immediately asks about his new friend and eddie tells him about the guy without hesitation#after shift tho buck is like. why didnt you tell me about him? after t i get why you dont want to but im just. you dont have to worry man.#buck. i know. im not worried. anyway he and i are gonna head to a bar to catch the game. you want to come with? you can bring t if hes free#oh. thats. thatd be okay? i dont want to idk ruin the vibe by bringing a date#nah man. itll be fine#and so he and t go to the bar and eddies already inside with the new friend and its Fine. its Great actually because t gets along with eddi#and the new guy and the new guy makes eddie laugh and doesnt miss a beat and knows more about the teams record this season than buck and#buck is doing Fine. this guys smile is big and his eyes are bright and when he laughs he sorta leans into eddies space alittle and its Fine#the night ends and buck and t go back to his apartment and buck cant stop thinking about that guys hand when it clapped down on eddies#shoulder or the look on his face as he teased eddie about the beer he drinks (cuz its kinda bad but only buck can say that) and buck Cant.#he wants that guy. he wants his hands and grin and teasing voice all to himself and not on eddie.#so he breaks up with t and ts confused af cuz i thought things were going good?#yeah. i just. i want to explore my options yk now that ive uh figured out i like men.#and its a clean break. not dramatic or messy. t tells him to call if he every changes his mind. buck wont.#bucks trying to not pry about eddies new friend and he doesnt grill eddie or anyone and just waits and listens to all the new info he gains#and eventually eddie invites him out to watch another game because whatever team they were watching made it to the playoffs#and when he gets there eddies like. no t tonight?#nah we. uh. we broke up.#eddie says sorry man that sucks. and the new guy is like. honestly he didnt even seem that into you which what an idiot. youre great.#and its good because the new guy splits his attention between the two of them now. eddie isnt the only one getting hands and grins and eyes#and the third time theyre at the bar the guy follows him to bathroom and kisses him hard against the door before pulling back with a#panicked sorry and leaving and when buck finds eddie after hes like. what happened? new guy ran out of here without even saying goodbye#he kissed me in the bathroom. i think uh. i think he was kinda freaking out about it and thats why he left.#and eddie just blinks at him before being like. buck. buck you said you werent going to do this again.#i didnt mean to! and buck means it. he just saw the way that guy made eddie laugh and put his hands on eddie and had eddies attention and#oh.
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THE IPOD IS WORKING
I REPEAT
THE IPOD
IS WORKING
#OKAY CONTEXT A FEW MONTHS AGO I BOUGHT AN IPOD CLASSIC‚ THE A1238 MODEL FROM 2007 TO BE EXACT#ON THE FLEA MARKET FOR THREE EUROS#THIS BAD BABY IS CAPABLE OF STORING EIGHTY GIGS OF MUSIC ON IT#TROUBLE IS‚ I WAS IN TOO MUCH SHIT TO GO LOOKING FOR A CABLE I COULD ATTEMPT TO CHARGE IT WITH#(the people at the flea market in my hometown are usually very honest about whether or not a piece of tech is working but i'll always have#my doubts until i see for myself)#TODAY I FINALLY MANAGED TO BRING MYSELF TO GO TO MY FAVORITE TECH STORE AND AFTER SOME DIGGING THEY ACTUALLY FOUND A 30-PIN CABLE#(it took them a while because the younger of the two dudes who were in the shift didn't exactly know what he was looking for. he brought a#package to the older guy and he said ''that's a samsung cable.'' in his defense‚ that cable and the actual 30-pin are incredibly similar in#shape so i don't blame him lmao‚ it was an honest mistake)#and i plugged that bad boy in tonight and NOT ONLY IS IT GIVING SIGNS OF LIFE (CHARGING)‚ IT SENT ME RIGHT TO THE MENU SCREEN AS SOON AS IT#GOT TO A CERTAIN PERCENTAGE!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#NOW I FINALLY HAVE THE MOTIVATION TO GO THROUGH MY ENTIRE YOUTUBE DOC AND EXTRACT EVERY SINGLE SONG I'VE LISTENED TO IN THE PAST THREE YEAR#(that's as far as they date the watch history logs‚ sadly - they start deleting them after some point so everything before late 2020 is los#to time‚ but fortunately enough there is PLENTY left!)#CAN I GET A HELLLLLL YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY#logs#I AM IMMEASURABLY HAPPY ABOUT THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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i should probably clarify that when i say stuff like i want karamatsu to explode or anything else along those lines, i'm joking and don't like. seriously wish harm on him. he has a tendency to incite some kind of cuteness aggression response in me so i thought expressing that through those kinds of jokes would be funny, but i can see how that could come across in a negative way.
#i do genuinely love karamatsu a lot he's shaped a lot of my tastes in fave characters#also gonna clarify that any of the jokes i make about kara do not carry over to kuroba#not doing too hot today folks. and i have a 9pm closing shift tonight ugh#mj rambles
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.
#it is 5 hrs past my bedtime and i am awake listening to Two Hearts by Dermot Kennedy on loop and crying over Rotating Shifts. again.#i couldn’t resist the urge to read the latest chapter any longer but i knew when i did i’d get like this#so Why did i wait for my period to roll around. i have made. a silly decision lmaooo#i’ve complained abt it before but i’m conflicted about how much more sensitive it makes me#my nightmares usually don’t make me cry but oh i was a Wreck this morning#so why i picked tonight to read the fic that always makes me cry is beyond me#i have never met a fic before that had me in such an intense emotional grip#and it’s fucking hilarious bc it’s not that intense of a story!! like yeah there’s been devastating parts but i’m out here having to-#-take a break every single chapter bc i’ll read one line that hits my inner child like a truck and i have to take a minute to recover#but the whiplash this fic gives me is so fucking funny and the range in the storytelling from comedy to tragedy is just.. *scream-cries*#it has my favorite characterization of Sun and Moon that i have ever seen#this chapter wasn’t even that sad i’m just Making myself sad about it#but on another level it also makes me sad in the sense that i don’t think i’ll ever be able to write something that good..#all that i want out of my writing endeavors is to make one (1) person feel as strongly and as much as RS makes me feel#and i don’t know if i can do that. i don’t know if my writing has what it takes bc i can’t even describe exactly what it is#i don’t think it’s a science that can be replicated. things either connect with someone or they don’t#the way Sun goes from worryingly innocent ‘wdym we can’t invite strangers to live with us?’ ‘wdym we can’t adopt an adult that needs help?’#to fucking. tearing an animatronic in half in a fit of protective rage and blocking access to all dating apps to prevent you from-#-finding anyone else bc he’s your Special Friend and he can’t have his Daydream falling for anyone else!! no no!!#it’s not a new concept but i eat it tf up when Sun is actually the one you should fear the most#like no i don’t think he’d hurt Reader but i dread to think of the things he would do For them#the back and forth between childlike innocence and terrifying intelligence possessiveness and physical capability is just mmmmm 100/10#and don’t even get me started on Moon. or i Will start crying again#he’s like yeah dumbass of course i’m gonna save you every time some POS man tries to **** you. of course i will you fucking crater-head#but i will complain at you about it the Entire way home and then i will steal your fucking toilet paper and pack you a raw egg for lunch#because i hate you 🖤 but Sun loves you and we would both kill for you 🖤 also i drank all of your chocolate milk 🖤 also i hate you :)#anyways i am paraphrasing obviously and dear god i hope no one who actually reads RS sees this bc i do not want my 2am ramblings taken as-#-any kind of Official Thoughtful Analysis of the story ok pls pls pls let me be insane abt my favorite fic without having to be articulate#i just have so many fucking FEELINGS about them. i am unwell.#i’m not even tagging this i’m just hitting post and going to sleep goodnight
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