#he's on his way to commite vehicular manslaughter

[kucka-g]

If you stare long enough you'll end up looking like him

oh no...

[outoftoucherlocksholmes]

it occurred to me while backing up procreate files last night that aside from Bad Bisexual Representation Booty Shorts Dio, i never posted any of the things from this canvas i had going for sketches while watching part 3 back in 2022, which is a shame, really

[pumpkinrootbeer]

I've started watching succession for the first time and my recap so far (I'm halfway through s2)

Shiv: she has crazy girlboss disease and I think many of her problems would be solved if she ate some pussy, 10/10 I love her and want her to act at least 43% more unhinged

Roman: literally deranged. a wet dog left outside in a box type of pathetic I want things to get so much worse for him. 10/10 ban him from ever getting professional help whatever is wrong with him is way funnier

Kendall: I have so many complicated feelings. Like he like sucks but in a way that is not nearly as fun for me as the other two but also he's so just miserable I can't look away any self distruction from him just gives me tummy aches ???/10

Two for the price of one Tom and Greg as a horrific bonus feature: I honestly hate both of them sorry.... like Tom would be engaging if he was idk. like 10% crazier and also a woman and Greg. if Greg was more pathetic I would be capitvated but I'm just like "oh cool tomfucker9000 is on the screen again" 4/10

Logan: Logan Logan/Logan

Bonus round: I love Conner I'm a conhead for life easily the funniest character, I thought I'd like maria in s1 but as it went on I realized she actually does like Logan for who he is absolutely devisating, I love gerri I love milfs I hope she makes roman worse and continues to use him for her own self achieving means. also Tabitha should be my girlfriend instead actually

I will update when I have more thoughts

[genshxn]

guess who wants to (honkai: star) rail another dragon man. there is also (un)fortunately no (star) railing in this.

written pre 1.3 so i’m making shit up for now. (this is also full of vidyadhara headcanons)

in which you find dan heng unable to sleep, you have an awkward conversation, and then he becomes somewhat dragon-brained. twice.

4.2K words (lmao this is way longer than i meant it to be)

you’re not the trailblazer, just another laddie aboard the express.

btw, i bullshited a good chunk of the dialogue and events, so apologies if this is shite. i might've also committed character vehicular manslaughter, in that he might be ooc. lol fingers crossed it's aight.

part 2’s finally up if you wanna read it here

despite the quiet of the night, you had drifted from your sleep. it had been painfully light as of recent, leaving you adrift in the shallows while you’d toss and turn for a comfortable position. could you really be blamed though? yes, the looming threat of phantylia had been taken out, and everyone from the express that went aboard the luofu had been reunited after what felt like weeks. but you were still in the thick of an intricate web of chaos. the threats were far from over, not with the stellaron still active. but at least for now, you had enough time in this brief respite to be able to not fucking sleep.

you rolled over. you were more or less itching with restlessness, sighing to yourself quietly over your woes of no sleep. you rose from your mussed bed and hobbled out of the room. it was a quaint little place—where you had stayed when it was just the express crew (minus dan heng), when you'd first met tingyun. after that, everything happened like a landslide. memories of her sudden death quickly boiled their way up. with each step you took, you stamped them back down again.

out in the small hallway, you made your way towards the small courtyard out the back. as you walked past the other rooms, you were a little jealous at the sounds of others sleeping. from mr. yang's and march’s respective rooms was the odd, soft snore. from stelle’s room, there was nothing (which was to be expected, as you often found her out messing with the cycrane systems at night). as you walked past dan heng’s room, you were expecting more silence—which you were of course met with, but also a slitted door. you peered through into the darkness. from the dim hallway light, it seemed he had also tried and failed at sleep if his abandoned, nest-like sheets were anything to go by.

you continued to the courtyard. once you cracked open the door, you were met with an unexpected sight. moonlight caught on the black, silken strands that spilt down his back. a glassy, teal tail coiled around his feet, almost glinting in the light with each of its subtle movements. dan heng, wearing his simple night clothes of old, baggy slacks and a tight, black tank top. his ears twitched as you slid the door open further. when you stepped onto the stone tiles, he cast you an over-shoulder glance—a new habit he’d picked up recently.

"can’t sleep either?" you asked him softly, approaching from behind. 

the only response he gave was a strained groan, dragging a hand over his face.

"i take that as a no, then," you said, moving over to sit in another stool at the small table just next to him. as you went past, his tail wound tighter around the foot of his seat. 

"i take it that it’s the same for you," he muttered in reply, jade eyes cast somewhere on the ground between him and you. 

"yep." you leaned against the table next to you, arm propping up your head. your eyes flickered to his face. "and not because i’ve been up playing gacha games."

he briefly met your gaze, eyebrows quirked in doubt.

"okay, i don’t do it anywhere near as much as stelle." 

"right," he said with the faintest hint of a smile. the tip of his tail twitched in amusement. "her room was very quiet when i walked past, though. perhaps she’s mended her ways." 

"i think she’s out screwing with the cycranes instead, actually." 

"of course she is," he breathed as he raked a hand through his long hair. as you watched it pass through the delicate tresses, you stared intently at his claws. after his initial transformation, to say you were floored was an understatement. perhaps more like you were punched 50,000 feet below sea level. he could really only be described as beautiful, but even that word couldn’t quite capture his ethereality. even when he was as exhausted as he looked now, he still seemed to glow—quite literally, too. his eyes and those horns atop his head shone faintly in the dark. when someone was that pretty, how could one not be reduced to a staring fool? particularly you.  as of recent, you’ve ended up forgetting you’re supposed to actually talk to him when he’s with you. and if you did remember to ever say anything, you’d make a fool of yourself. 

he watched your gaze affixed to his hands. he took one look at them and then wrung them in his lap, looking off to the side with an unreadable emotion in his eyes. 

"ah, i’m sorry—" you began, but he quickly cut you off. 

"it’s fine," he said hurriedly, tail coiling up tighter.

"no, really. i know i’ve been acting pretty weir—" 

"i said it’s fine. please, just leave it." he said again. he unwound himself just a little, but the tense line of his shoulders still had yet to dissipate. his gaze wandered a little more back towards you. "may i ask what’s keeping you up?" 

you weren’t thrilled at the spontaneous topic change, but replied nonetheless. "just about everything, i guess. a lot’s been going on. it’s hard to take any time to rest with a stellaron still effectively looming overhead," you said. "though i could only imagine it’s about that, but tenfold for you, given the whole..." you gestured vaguely to his whole new look. 

he dragged a hand down his face, rubbing his sleepy eyes in the process. "i don’t want to think about the stellaron for now…"

"agreed. shall we put a pin in that topic, then?"

"that would be ideal."

the two of you sat in more silence. you were (only half) guiltily back to staring at his features, eyes running over all parts of him. he seemed to shrink under your gaze, ears and tail twitching with thought. his eyes drifted up to look at you—oh, there was something new. his pupils must dilate or constrict based on what he was looking at. when his eyes met yours, you could have sworn they momentarily expanded, until his eyes flickered away again, waning right back to slits. at the same time, his ears angled themselves down just a touch. 

"a—are you feeling okay?" you asked, tilting your head a little. he made a small groan and shelled further into himself. you didn’t think you had ever seen him that tense. "hey, look at me. are you alright?" your voice was as soft as you could make it. you tried to reach out to the arm he had leaning on the table, but it was in vain. he inched away moments before contact.

"i—" his tail-tip continued to flicker with apprehension. 

"well, something else is definitely bothering you. can you talk to me about it?"

"m-must i?" he was almost hiding his face.

"only if you want to," you shuffled yourself a little closer to him. "but if it’s weighing this much on you, it may make you feel a little lighter. so you can sleep. y’know." while you spoke, you gestured somewhat vaguely. ever since his vidyadhara heritage was put on full display, he hadn’t quite been the same as you knew him. he was more tense than usual. on-edge and anxious, preoccupied with his own thoughts, much unlike the down-to-earth dan heng you normally knew. it worried you. he wasn’t even really speaking to mr. yang. with everything that had been going on, you could barely begin to imagine what sort of turmoils he had churning within him. 

"i suppose one thing is that i’m simply not used to this form," he ran a clawed, slender finger up from the base of his horn to the tip. "there’s a strange disparity between feeling like i’ve known myself to be like this my whole existence, but also that i’m suddenly someone i’m not." as he spoke, his voice was quiet. "in a similar vein, it’s like my tail has a mind of its own. look at it," he grumbled while he picked it up into his lap. as he held it bundled in his arms, the tip hung over the side, twitching to and fro. "i’m not trying to make it do that. i can’t control it." he sighed, a slight growl in his throat. 

"wouldn’t it do that because you’ve been so… frazzled, as of recent?" 

"what makes you think that?" 

"um…" how were you supposed to tell him that you only had that theory because you had been constantly stealing glances of him, watching his moods, watching his languid beauty. instead, you thought of some other bullshit answer. "i mean, it’d make sense, wouldn’t it? it’s like cats. their tails twitch when they’re irritated, and i’m sure they can’t quite control it." 

he frowned a little, ears twitching downward. "i’m not a cat," he said, almost with a little pout. 

maybe not, but he was certainly cute like one. "anyway, what you said about your new features…" you began, scratching the back of your head. to your surprise, he looked at you with eyes just a little wider than normal. "i could only imagine how weird it must be for you… who am i kidding, no i couldn’t. it’s probably downright foreign, but you’re dan heng. i’m sure you’ll have it under control in no time." 

with his hands on his knees, he aimlessly grabbed at fistfuls of his loose pants. "you…" he muttered, wetting his lips as he swallowed thickly once again. 

"me?" you echoed quietly.

"forgive me for asking something so asinine, but… what… do you think?" as he muttered out the words, you could have sworn his face was turning a light shade of pink. however, it was hard to tell under only the moon and the dim lights of the courtyard. what you could tell was that his tail-tip was twitching like a bundle of nerves.

you stared at him with owlish eyes. "what do i think of what?" 

"what do you think of… me. as i am now?" 

your breath caught in your throat for a moment as he stared at you with such apprehensive eyes. they were slitted from nerves, but they shone with the moonlight, expectation and most curiously, some sort of hope. "um…"

"i’ve noticed how much you stare at me, yet you said nothing when you first saw me, unlike mr. yang or march. now, you feel almost stilted when you’re with me, like you refuse to address what’s in front of you." 

you swallowed hard at his words. "didn’t stelle also not…" you trailed off. you were doing it again, what he quite literally just said. 

"i’ve spoken to her since then. i’m asking you." he seemed to have regained a little confidence, sitting up straighter and looking at you with the slightest bit more intensity.

now it was your turn to grab at fistfuls of your clothes. you fidgeted with the hem of your shirt as you spoke, heart pounding a mile a minute. "you’ve been truthful with me, so i guess i should too," you muttered. "you, ah, um…" this was really not the direction you thought this conversation would go in. "to be really honest with you, i keep staring because you’re so… pretty."

dan heng sat motionless. if it weren’t for his vidyadhara features, he almost could have gotten away with simply being frozen. upon your words, his eyes widened just a fraction, jade-white pupils dilating. his ears twitched back upwards and his tail fell still. heavy moments of silence passed while you two stared at each other. it seemed like he was waiting for you, so you kept talking. "i didn’t speak much to begin with simply because i was so surprised. i mean, we see you again after so long and there you are, just about the most beautiful thing i’d ever seen, suddenly with the power to split an ocean. after that, i didn’t trust myself to not be weird about you, so i… kind of just refused to say anything." you rubbed the back of your neck, face burning. "but i guess that plan fell flat on its face if you noticed me staring so much." 

once you finished speaking, his gaze fell into his lap, gazing down at his hands that held fistfuls of fabric once again. "but… these powers aren’t me." 

"of course not. they’re not you, only a fraction of the whole you," there was a slight smile on your lips. "are you worried that i don’t see you as dan heng anymore?" 

he made no effort to confirm or deny anything, simply remaining as he was—a blatant yes for him. 

a small smile made its way onto your face. "you’re always going to be one and only dan heng that the whole express—that i—know and love, no matter what other forms you take." you shuffled yourself closer to him once again, now finally able to reach out and brush your thumb over the back of his hand. as you sat there, your face was burning up at your words. did you really have to word it like that? if you really wanted to be honest with him, then yes. 

he was still sat ramrod upright, but a blush now dusted his cheeks and his pupils were blown wide. his tail-tip was back to moving, this time wagging back and forth. he looked between you and your hand on his own, letting out a shaky breath. while he was still as nerve-wrecked as could be, a weight on his shoulders seemed to have been lifted. he looked like he was about to say something, but as soon as he opened his mouth, out came a long yawn. even though he tried to hide it with with his wrist, you still managed to catch a glimpse of his fangs. 

"sorry," he muttered, rubbing one of his eyes. “also, you’re still staring."

"ah, i—i’m sorry, i’ve been acting so weird. i—that habit’s not gonna go away any time soon…" you yanked your hands back into your lap. he looked a little disappointed at the new lack of contact. "anyway, how do you think you’ll sleep now?"

"please do not worry about me. what about yourself?" 

"um…" your heart is still pounding in your throat. "i—i don’t know, to be honest." whatever the answer was, it was bound to be ‘not well’.

"in the past, you’ve come to the archives when you haven’t been able to sleep. you’d place yourself on my bed and then ten minutes later, i’d find you fast asleep." his voice was soft when he spoke, almost with a faint note of mirth. "i wouldn’t mind if you…"

your eyes almost fell out of your head. "hold on, are you really—"

"you’re welcome to sleep next to me, if you’d like." 

"like in your room?" 

"where else?" when he stared at you, there wasn’t much obvious emotion on his face, but at the same time, he seemed so earnest with his tail-tip flicking back and forth happily. 

"but i thought you found it annoying when i did that?" 

"only because you'd wake me in the early hours of the morning. truly, i’ve never been opposed to it."

your face prickled with heat as you raked a hand through your hair. "are you sure you’re completely the same dan heng?" 

"hey." he looked miffed. 

"sorry, sorry." you were just about hiding your face in your hands by this point. "i just thought—" before you could finish, he stood up, long tail unwinding from around the seat. he took two steps and then plucked you off of your own chair. as you yelped in shock, he flopped you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “hey, what’re you—?!" 

"would you stop being so adamant if i say it will help me sleep too?" 

you gave up drumming on his back, only able to hang in embarrassment as you covered your face. your head may as well have been steaming. "wh—what the fuck is this?" 

he made no reply as he marched you back inside. as he walked, you watched his tail-tip as it was curled upwards, swaying from side to side. his room was close—he opened the door with his foot, stepped in and slid it closed again with his tail. as soon as you were properly enclosed, he placed you onto the bed with unexpected gentleness. in the past, if you were causing trouble, his method of dealing with you was hauling you off somewhere and simply dropping you—now, it was the opposite. you were left dazed in the middle of the sheet-nest, only back to your senses once dan heng got in next to you. but instead of settling down for sleep like you anticipated, he was shuffling about on his knees, rearranging the sheets and pillows so they were in a better formation, according to him. he was even using his tail to smooth out the sheets into circular patterns. 

"are you nesting or something?" you asked, bewildered. 

with no reply, he finally settled down further up against the splayed pillows. "come." he held his arms open for you, but when you made no movement, his tail roped you in instead. you were drawn into his not-very-tight vice grip, trapped in next to him. he held you loosely around the waist with clasped hands, head placed atop your leg where he seemed to be using your side like a pillow. his horns poked into your stomach every time he nuzzled... he was really nuzzling you...

"dan heng, seriously, what’s gotten into you?" 

with only a hum, he ceased his movements and craned his head up, staring at you from behind thick lashes. his pupils were still blown wide open. you couldn’t help but find it mildly foreboding. 

"i don’t understand why you’re… so touchy. i thought you were normally allergic to contact?" 

"is it not enjoyable?" he tilted his head. his fluffy hair flopped in his face with his movement. internally, one part of you was screaming YEEEES and crushing beer cans into your forehead, while the other, larger part of you was just plain screaming. you wanted to bask in this shower of attention, but at the same time, it felt so wrong—like he wasn’t really himself. whatever dragon-brain mindfuckery was going on in his head, it was certainly potent. 

"it’s not that, i just… are you sure you’re thinking straight? or do i need to spell out the situation? because you’ve hauled me back to your bed, made a nest around me and are now cuddling me like a pillow."

dan heng blinked once, twice and then his body went rigid. he pushed himself off of you and leapt to the corner of the bed, crouched with his tail once again wound around him. "wh—what was i…?" he looked down at his hands as if they were soaked in blood. his face was flaring red with a blush. 

"you seemed rather convinced i was something like your treasure hoard for a moment," you said.

upon your words, he sank his head in his hands, and whatever noise he made in embarrassment sounded like a groaning sob. "forgive me, i don’t know what came over me…" 

"some kinda vidyadhara instinct?” it was almost like he was trying to court you. 

"something like that," he muttered from behind his hand that now covered his mouth. his gaze was fixed to a random point before him and his ears were down-turned. "i… i’ve never felt it that strong before."

"wait, you’ve felt it befo—?" right before you could finish, his tail silenced you, thwacking itself against your lips. meanwhile, he was hiding his face again. with the way his shoulders hunched, you were worried—he seemed genuinely distressed. it was a miracle he hadn’t run off somewhere by that point. with a concerned frown, you took his tail in hand and spoke again. "hey, um, this might not help whatsoever, but it was actually… rather nice when you did that." you struggled to look at him. if you called it cute like it was, you’d just be blowing whatever chance you had at keeping him in place. 

he looked over at you, ears perked up. his incredulous eyes went as wide as could be, almost like two moons. a moment passed, and the tail in your hands began to sway. "really?"

"really," you nodded. "it was just shocking to begin with, but i—if you want, you can do it again."

dan heng turned his body to face you, swallowing thickly and trying to meet your gaze. he was stuck dithering for a few moments until he ultimately crashed again, flopping forward until his face was flat on the mattress. "i can’t," he muttered, voice muffled. 

"oh, um, why?" your eyes went wide. 

he turned his face to the side, unable to make a coherent reply beyond a strained, squeaky groan. he was still burning hot with a heavy flush, but it was soon covered by his tail that draped itself over his head. "too embarrassing.” 

a small, light laugh slipped from your lips. he coiled further into himself at the sound of it, but he was soon unwound when you had your hands on him, guiding him back up next to you. he was as stiff as could be when he laid down next to you, gaze cast down the other end of the bed. you tucked a stray lock of long hair behind one of his ears. when your touch grazed past him, his pink-tipped ear twitched wildly, and he buried his face into the pillow beneath him. "why don’t you let me do something? you did say this would help you sleep, didn’t you?"

"while i was practically in a daze. i wasn’t thinking right," he complained, voice once again muffled. "this will only keep me awake, if anything." 

"maybe, we’ll see." as you spoke, you took to running your fingers through his long, silky hair. you gathered it up from behind him and brought it forward, draping it over his shoulder. your fingers glided through as though they were passing through a soft mist, fluid and sleek. before long, as you gradually let your hands drift higher until they would pass over his head, he began to decompress. stuttering, held breaths became steady and soft. his nervous-contorted face was dissipating, and his heavy blush was fading to a simple dusting of pink. 

when his eyes fell closed, you glanced up at his horn. beyond just staring at him, you were also tempting fate with how much you wanted to touch his new features. you couldn’t help it though—humans are such curious, tactile creatures, it was simply in your nature. one hand left his hair, which he barely seemed to notice, and inched its way to his horn that threatened to poke you. finally, your fingertip ghosted its surface. it was as smooth as glass, and just as cool to the touch. in fact, you could almost describe it as silky, like his scales. he twitched under your touch, eyes parting open. his pupils were blown wide open again. 

"ah, i’m sorry, i—" you began, but he soon cut you off. 

"no, keep going." he grabbed your hand and placed it back on his horn. you blinked incredulously for a moment, but soon continued as you were, running your fingertips up and down the glassy blue projections. he closed his eyes again and, making yours widen, his soft breaths were followed by a faint rumbling in his chest—a purr. he really was like a cat. 

a few moments later, you felt something long wind its way around your leg. you looked down. his tail was snaking its way up your leg, until the tip draped itself happily over your lap where it laid swishing from side to side. you fell still in shock when he shuffled his body closer to yours until he laid flush against your side. he laid one of his arms across your chest and reached for your shoulder, pulling you in just a little closer to him. 

"you stopped again." his voice was barely a whisper when he leaned his head in the crook of your neck. one of his horns was cool against the back of your neck. 

"it’s a little hard to do anything when you’re this close," you muttered back. 

"then just stay as you are." he nuzzled about with a yawn. he must have been finally settling down for sleep, but that meant using you as a body pillow. your tail-twined leg was drawn towards him, where he draped his own leg over top of it, caging it in between his calves. 

“d-dan heng…” you tried to say his name as if that would do anything, but he paid you no mind. lost in his hypnagogic trance, he only muttered sweet nothings with his lips against your shoulder.

his voice was barely audible. dragon-brain must have been in full swing, because he finished off with a quiet: “you will be mine one day, my beloved…"

you nearly exploded then and there.

i love me some emotive ears, mm yes.

[lowkeyrobin]

Hi, could I request a Trevor Spengler x reader where they meet at Ray's Occult Books? Maybe he was on his way to Occult Books (for whatever reason lol) and driving the Ecto-1 and almost ran them over and then they meet again in the actual bookstore? Thanks!

yeah sure!! ; sorry this took so long to get out, lots of procrastination and writers block lmaooo ; I apologize for this being so short as well lol ; thanks for requesting! hope you enjoy ; anon if you didn't see me respond to ur apology you're totally fine! sorry if I sounded mean or anything lol

TREVOR SPENGLER ; vehicular manslaughter

summary ; Trevor's dumbass almost runs you over

warnings ; language, near death experience, corny ending

word count ; 486

masterlist

Your lonely yet calm walk down to Ray's Occult Books couldn't have gone worse.

You were listening to Remy through your wired earbuds, enjoying the sunny weather in the city. You carry about fifty dollars in your wallet, wanting to spend it on some of the books at the shop. Ray always had the weirdest but most intriguing selection, it was impossible to not stop by every here and there once you finished up another novel.

You turn to cross the street, jaywalking, perhaps. In truth and in your defense, there was no one at that night until that stupid asshole showed up. Why he was driving like a maniac at top speed was beyond you, but luckily for your quick reflexes, you'd lived to see another day. You watch as the car speeds away, tire marks staining the concrete road.

You gasped for air, having felt like you'd nearly thrown up your heart and stomach. You throw your middle finger up, a look of frustration on your face. You turn back, continuing your walk down to your location.

As you enter the building, the doorbell jingles, causing Ray and Podcast to look up and at you.

"Hey Y/n!" Podcast smiles, "What's new?"

"Almost got ran over out there" You joke, "What's up, Ray?"

"Here for books?"

"Y'know it, old man"

"Christ, I'm not that old"

You make your way back to the bookshelves, scanning the spines of them for any interesting titles that would entice you. You hear a car motor outside, and they end up parking on the curb like they were in some sort of hurry.

The driver rushes in, nearly in a panic as he looks between Ray and Podcast.

"Do you guys know where Phoebe is?"

"Nope"

"No, why?"

You look at the car outside, identifying it as the one that had nearly ran you over minutes prior. You pull your earbuds out of your ears, and your eyes land on the boy who was driving.

"You're the asshole who almost killed me!"

Trevor's eyes widen, looking between you and the other two. "What?"

"You almost fucking killed me, like, three minutes ago" You restate, crossing your arms with furrowed brows. "What're you in such a rush for? Are you trying to commit vehicular manslaughter?"

Podcast stands between you two, trying to diffuse the situation. "Trevor, this is Y/n, Y/n this is Trevor-"

"I don't care?"

"Shush, Pod"

He quickly quiets himself.

"You're an ass, learn how to drive"

"Learn how to not jaywalk!"

He had you there.

Ray snickers, finding the bickering amusing. "Trevor, go find your sister. I better not get a call from your mother tonight wondering where she is"

"Damnit" He grumbles, glaring at you as he leaves the shop.

You watch him leave and speed away, then turn back to Podcast and Ray.

"He's kinda cute"

"I thought he almost killed you?"

"So?"

[faggot-greg-house]

time 4 me to rant abt house again. tragically i think abt that old man constantly

so let's talk about the demonization of addiction in the show, specifically in season 7 + season 8. sorry if this is formatted really weirdly or doesn't make the most sense but i'm not sorry enough to change it

house is an addict. this is an incontrovertible truth. house does not stop being an addict once he gets sober, and i think the show treats that fact in a downright cruel way. this extends through a LOT of parts of the show, particularly in the ways that house and his pain management are treated, but none of them make me quite as angry as season 7.

in season 7, house relapses. he relapses because he is terrified. house is not good at coping and we all know this, and he spent many years coping with vicodin. it made his life easier to live in so many ways!! but in season 7, he's sober (and his pain is being managed in such a shitty way but WHATEVER) and he's faced with the frankly terrifying thought of his partner having cancer, and he relapses! there is literally nothing wrong with this. relapsing is normal and okay and not an issue. recovery from addiction is not a straight line! relapsing doesn't mean you have failed or that your recovery is ruined or damaged. relapsing is common and normal and something to be treated with kindness and patience and support.

when house relapses, cuddy responds with anger and breaks up with him. i do not understand a universe where cuddy is an accomplished doctor, a kind person, and the partner of an addict, and yet she reacts the way she does to his relapse. it is utterly unbelievable to me because it is so fucking incredibly out of character.

not only is this unbelievably out of character, it is so fucking cruel. for a show with a relatively okay/nuanced depiction of addiction and disability to take such a sharp turn into "once you relapse you are a failure" is so....... demoralizing and saddening. they decided house is a failure because he relapsed. they decided house should lose the people who love him because he relapsed. they decided that house should commit literal and actual attempted vehicular manslaughter as a snowball effect result of relapsing. i don't understand how the show went that direction, and frankly it makes me so fucking sad to see

[amourluvie]

Could you write relationships headcanons for Will and LJ please? 🥺 (separately of course)

YESYESYES MY TWO STUPID HUSBANDSSS

Will grossman + laughing jack x reader headcanons (non poly) !

I love you sm anon tysm for requesting this !

WILL GROSSMAN

- y'all are like that one " the bride and the ugly ass groom" meme

- like you know couples where the gf is like a whole entire goddess and the boyfriends is just a stupid loser? Yeah that's you and him.

- he's extremely clingy , following you like a lost puppy looking for it's mother every chance he gets.

- he's also heavy on pda too,he will literally melt if you smother his face in kisses while you are out in public,he always has to hold you in some way too,such as holding your waist or hand,or simply just putting a arm around you. He wants to feel you close to him every millisecond.

- if you laugh to his stupid jokes,listen to him contentfully while he rambles about how skibidi toilet is a masterpiece, he will marry you immediately.

- he's honestly really clumsy, so you need to like keep an eye out on him on him incase he falls down the stairs (or commits vehicular manslaughter)

LAUGHING JACK

- you thought will was clingy? lj is even clingier, which makes sense due to his fuckass abandonment issues that Isaac gave him.

- you probably have to teach him about boundaries and when you do, he will respect them but still be clingy,he's just scared you will disappear from his grasp if he doesn't hold you,he can't bear to lose and get abandoned by someone he trusted once again.

- he has insane jealousy issues,he can't stand you talking to another one that's not him,his monochrome heart,which used to be all colourful,aches when he sees your pretty eyes on someone that's not him.

- however he will just be jealous in silence. He doesn't want you to think he's just just being way to controlling or possessive. But the look on his face,eyes full of envy and jealousy,says otherwise and you had to reassure you had eyes for no other,but him only.

- you love and accepted him for he truly was,he will never do something you won't like. Best bf/husband 100/10

[rocksibblingsau]

Techno Branch is that one dude that was living life so good and healthily that he kinda forgor his inner murderous rage and rage against the gods themselves for like 20 years of his life

Now that he remeber (reunited with the pop trolls and his bio brothers) hes still a care-free and mostly well-adjust guy, but he will commit war crimes at the sign first of inconvenience but like just for the funssies you know he is just a girl your honor, a silly goose if you will you shouldn't send a little guy like him to jail should you 🥺🥺🥺

It's not like its his fault that everyone around him back at techno was so accepting and caring that he doesn't know a way to deal with conflict that isn't fucking survival of the fittest inner 7 year old killing a bear over prey coming out kill or be killed type shit etc. He just simply doesn't know the appropriate response to passive aggressiveness, so he goes to the tried and trued method of resolving conflicts, vehicular manslaughter

Rip Techno Branch, he would have hated (but healed) Conflict is not abuse by Sarah Schulman /j

He's literally just a girl and a silly goose your honor.

But yeah he didn't have many of those conflicts come up in Techno Reef but unlike with the other tribes, Techno has the most similar vibe when it comes to happiness and yet they still manage to be respectful.

So he has a lot of rage that even Rock Branch doesn't, and no clue what to do with it. Especially as before Trollstopia, most Pop Trolls don't understand the Techno way of hashing things out.

King Trollex keeps giving him stress balls to squeeze but he just ends up popping them. That's why Techno Branch isn't allowed to hold Beat Drop Button.

That and on account of all the property damage the two cause when together. Beat Drop is unfortunately an enabler of impulsive thoughts, and really should be kept on a leash. Beat Drop is kind of like Pennywhistle in that he's one of the characters I think can and does say fuck. Actually I think he says it routinely.

To be honest I've actually given Beat Drop way too much lore and personality.

He gets along GREAT with Techno Branch though, given the bloodlust.

[hbyrde36]

When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💞

Thanks friend! It's very hard to choose a fav five, and I'm sure my answers would be different on any given day, but for today here they are, in no particular order:

I Don't Think We're In Hawkins Anymore, Big Boy

After being run off the road in a freak accident during a terrible storm, Steve and Eddie find that not only have they committed vehicular manslaughter, but they’ve also somehow been whisked away to a strange land. The journey is rough and they are being hunted for revenge, but through it all Steve and Eddie grow closer than ever as they try and find their way home with the help of some new friends with familiar faces.

-Or-

Steddie Wizard of Oz 👠

Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter

Steve Harrington is an animator. Some people call it a gift, the ability to raise the dead, but to Steve It’s just a job. A way to help mourning families find closure after the sudden death of a loved one, or aid the courts in settling everything from disputed wills to murder cases.

He is also a licensed vampire hunter and executioner.

Two years ago, vampirism became legal in the United States, granting its undead population citizenship and everything that new status entails, which complicates things for Steve, as he is suddenly tasked with helping the very creatures he's grown accustomed to killing. He struggles in more ways than one when he finds himself working closely, intimately, with none other than Eddie Munson, an undeniably sexy several-hundred-years old master vampire.

-Or-

The Anita Blake/Steddie AU that nobody asked for

Honey, You're Familiar

Songfic, inspired by From Eden by Hozier. Written for the Stranger Things Writer's Guild Hozier Project.

WC limit: 3000

Times Like These (The Anniversary Edition)

When Eddie finds himself back in his living room, staring down a very alive Chrissy Cunningham, after just having bled to death himself in the middle of a nightmare world, he was rightfully very, very fucking confused.

-Or-

What happens when the new guy, who only just got inducted into the fucked up world of monsters and mayhem, gets stuck in a time loop and finds himself responsible for saving everyone?

The Crawl

Will Byers is only 12 years old when he learns that monsters are real, and is taken far away to another world that looks like his home, but isn't. The place that would come to be known as the Upside Down is a mystery. No one knows the origins of its existence or why it was seemingly frozen in time on the day Will was taken.

The only thing they know for sure about the other dimension is that it does not play by the rules of the real world, and that, as the newest member of the party comes to realize, has possibilities.

Time travel stories love to play with the idea that one small act can have an incredible impact on the future. What if, in a weird twist of fate, Will is found in the Upside Down by a friendly face who just can't keep his mouth shut, and is sent home safely with a warning of what's to come. Will it be enough to change everything?

[bootyshitter]

I return with a humble request.

Calender man sex poem

I deeply apologize for answering so late. You may have the opportunity to shoot me in ONE leg as repentance for my sins.

Here you go!

on monday im gay

on tuesday he kills my padre

on Wednesday he commits vehicular manslaughter on the freeway

on thursday again im gay

but every day of the week

calendar man is my sneaky link

calendar man sex poem

man, I really gotta bone

calendar man sex poem

please Bruce Wayne give me a loan

genius level intellect

he’s super big backed that’s the after effect

how you gonna be a genius

but can’t fix those eyebrows, like I would expect

honestly I don’t mean no disrespect

you’re my last choice but I still would become erect

and if you reject me calendar man dick Grayson will be my rebound

it’s gonna sound like pound pound pound

it’s gonna sound like thwop thwop thwop

calendar man is lowkey crazy, I gave him a hot dog on the wrong day of the week and he gave me a bomb

man he’s more crazy than gon

man, is he a mafia don

wait, my name is juan

hi I’m Juan and I’m here to say

calendar man is not okay

he croquets, and he slays, and he gays, and he plays but honestly I’m tired of his booty decay

I want to go back to metropolis

where the people are nice and it doesn’t smell like shit

also I think calendar man is quite unfi- GUNSHOT *BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM*

heh, sorry bout that

juan is dead

I shot him in the head

I’m the calendar man and this is the sex poem

January February, marchuary, heyyy

Every month calendar man is a slay

Slay what? Ya momma

And your big backed gramma

Hell throw your poppa all the way from here to Tijuana

Monday he gon shake his booty, slam it on yo FACE,

make it go round and round like it’s a race

On Tuesday he will take his head, point it to the sunnn

The glare will shine so brightly it will laser off your bum

Wednesday there’s a little thing called GYAT he makes POP

Everyday of the week he acts like a BOP

Thursday he’s gonna take his weiner dog for a walk

Then shoot with Glock until it stops to squawk

then on Friday he pulls out his real weiner

And puts it on the grill for a nice steak dinner

Saturday and Sunday he’s busy doing blackface

calendar man is my sneaky link

calendar man sex poem

man, I really gotta bone

calendar man sex poem

[tamsong]

kotlc characters most to least likely to commit vehicular manslaughter

this is based on a post about stranger things so if you made that and ur seeing this ily

1. keefe. does not have his license. hit a mailbox on his first time driving and his dad refused to take him out anymore after that. alvar tried to teach him after that but after keefe accidentally skidded into a cornfield on a country road and scratched up alvar’s car, he decided to just Stop before further endangering anyone’s life. king of public transportation tbh

2. linh. this might be surprising, including to her, because linh thinks she’s good at driving but is absolutely not. either drives 20 under the speed limit or speeds 20 over. gets distracted easily and almost never has her eyes on the road, so she’d probably commit a hit and run and not even notice. somehow hasn’t done this yet.

3. sophie. failed her license test twice and only passed the third time because the instructor took pity on her. absolute menace on the roads, gets extremely stressed when there’s any amount of other cars around and loses most control of the vehicle. would be higher but she’s less likely to commit vehicular manslaughter and more likely to get rear ended by braking too quickly or jump the curb on a too-sharp turn.

4. biana. has gotten multiple tickets for distracted driving because of her attempts to talk to her passengers, apply mascara, and put her hair up all at once, not even mentioning how she blasts her music at eardrum-shattering volumes and can never hear when she’s being honked at. causer of road rage. doesn’t speed though so at least has that going for her.

5. fitz. neither of the younger vacker siblings are the drivers of the family. fitz drives normally until he makes a risky decision like plowing through an intersection right as the light turns red, or weaving between cars on the highway. suffers from murderous road rage whenever anyone else does these things. has invented at least a dozen new death threats. would not commit vehicular manslaughter but rather vehicular murder.

6. tam. decent driver but seems even better due to the vast difference of skills between him and linh. pretty confident in his ability, but does have the tendency to get way into his music, have to swerve to make his turn last minute, and then white-knuckle the wheel for the rest of the trip. otherwise pretty safe.

7. marella. you’d expect her to be worse, honestly, but marella learned to drive early in order to take her mom places after her head injury. takes great care of her passengers. however, when alone, marella’s notorious for texting and driving. claims she’s mastered the technique because she hasn’t fucked up yet. (DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.)

8. maruca. pretty safe driver, doesn’t do anything more egregious than a bit of tasteful speeding. unlikely to hit anyone because she stays unnecessarily far from the people in front of her.

9. dex. capable driver, probably because his dad has been illegally teaching him since age 12 in the slurps and burps parking lot.

10. wylie. very responsible, never goes more than three over the speed limit. the only reason he isn’t last is because Not being the one driving stresses him out so badly and he will yell at the person in the driver’s seat when they fuck up, which will probably make them fuck up even worse, causing an accident by proxy. for this reason he’s almost always the driver.

11. stina. she has to control rowdy horses all the time at home so a car is easy peasy. never give her aux though because she always defaults to country music

[kosmicsandshoes]

KOSMIC WDYM 3P?? you just dropped a whole ass new au and act like nothing happened?! loredump PLEASE the people need to know

Alright alright alright lmao

It kinda started as me really just wanting an excuse to come up with more alternate character designs, but I did brainstorm it all day and really think about it.

3p, like 2p, is of course another alternate universe. Instead of being a dystopia, 3p is more of a paranormal world in the sense that the things seen in movies like The Blair Witch Project and Texas Chainsaw Massacre happen all too frequently and are normalized to an extent.

Basically, life is a horror movie in the 3p universe, and everyone just kinda has to deal with it.

Since I haven't had the chance to draw the others yet, I won't get into them, but I will explain the 3p big 3.

3p Nogla is the most manipulative of everyone in the group, for better or worse. He puts on the front of being the sweetest, most wholesome man to ever walk the earth and uses his silvery tongue to get people to do his bidding, whether that be to commit vehicular manslaughter or simply allowing him to cut in line. His borderline mystical powers also cause him to become obsessive to a creepy extent. If any one person peaks his interest even mildly, he obsessively stalks them and takes in their every move, and because of his cutesy, charming personality (and his own manipulative abilities), no one ever raises any suspicions. This usually comes to a head in 3p Nogla growing bored of the object of his obsessions, and discarding them one way or another.

3p Terroriser is a strange case. Much like his 1p counterpart, by some manner of the world, he gained sentience. Unlike his t-800 counterpart however, he's a t-900, the 3p universe's midway point between the t-800 and t-1000. He's more equipped to handle the burden of sentience than t-800 Terroriser is, but as a side effect, he's also more susceptible to negative human emotions. Such as flagrant narcissism. He's extremely prideful, and never does anything that he's told to, believing he knows what's right and wrong and everyone else is stupid. This also gives him absolute immunity to 3p Nogla's manipulation abilities.

3p Vanoss is definitely the most odd out of this bunch, and maybe even the whole 3p group. Completely different to both his 1p and 2p counterparts. Due to what can only be described as a series of unfortunate events involving illicit scientific experimentation, 3p Vanoss is not all there mentally. He's much like a feral cat cornered in an alleyway. He's manic and distrusting due to his past. He has a tendency to lash out and scratch and bite if he's too freaked out. His beak is typically tied shut as a result, and his bite seems to be lethal, as the only one who's survived being bitten by 3p Vanoss is 3p Terroriser (this is the canonical explanation as to why his endoskeleton arm is exposed, the bite corroded both his jacket and synthetic skin away). He's quick to anger as well, think like the tasmanian devil; any little thing could set him off, hence why 3p Nogla sticks around. While he's not as easily swayed like the rest of the world, he can still be talked down rather easily.

I hope this is a good explanation for now, I will definitely be doing more with this and making more designs since I just really like it.

[ohitsanavocadothanks2]

Incorrect Quotes Generator

Neal: I am an expert at identifying birds. Peter: Okay, what about those ones flying over there? Neal: Yeah, they're all birds.

-------------

Neal: Get in, loser, we’re committing vehicular manslaughter!

-------------

Neal: One time I went to hand Peter a bowl of soup. I wanted to say “Careful, it’s hot!”, and “Here’s your soup!”, so instead I blurted out “Careful it’s soup.”

-------------

Someone: Go to hell! Jane: Oh! I’ve been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.

-------------

Rigsby: Jane’s amazing at concentrating. Once he starts reading, the only way he’ll notice you is if you take his book away. Not even if you hit him or shake him! Cho: That was him ignoring you.

-------------

Jane: accidentally sets the kitchen on fire Jane : We need an adult! Rigsby: Jane , you are an adult! Jane : We need an adultier adult! Get Lisbon!

-------------

Bones: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small. Hodgins: I would say infinitesimally. Booth: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words.

[matt-imagines-popcorn]

HEEEY I just, uh, you know maybe you could write something with Noise from Pizza Towe? I'm absolutely in love with this jerk, especially without the costume ☠️☠️maybe headcanons on what it's like to be in a relationship with him?

Oh but of course! I always have time to write for our silly little freak (affectionate)

Being in a relationship with The Noise [Gender-Neutral! Reader]

Noise has plenty of experience with one-off flings left and right and short-term relationships that only survive to the three-month mark. He’s practically a natural at it! However long-term relationships with someone he really-really-really-really likes are quite some uncharted territory for him. Of course, your boy Theodore won't just admit that so you just have to see the evidence for yourself.  At first, he’s definitely more of an annoying roommate than an actual boyfriend.  Doesn’t clean up after himself, is loud when you try to sleep/work, and worst of all steals your food without even asking. But he’s willing to do better if he really cares about you, you just might have to push/remind him a little to get on with his chores, and he’ll get to it then (Perhaps not without a bit of back talking). 

His love language is definitely a physical touch. It's damn near impossible for him to get his hands off of his partner. Even while you two sleep, he still finds a way to worm himself next to you, arms wrapped tightly around you. However, despite this, he rejects any form of affection that is considered soft while out in public. He’s got a reputation to keep up with babe! He can’t throw all of that out the window!

But don’t be fooled! He can be a softy at times but much like a feral cat, it takes some work (and some hissing).  It’s a rare sight to see him in a calm state unless you know the totally-super-secret-didn’t-made-it-up-on-the-spot Noise-Chill-Out™ technique. It’s quite a simple technique really, it's quite a surprise no one has figured it out but petting his hair of all things gets him very sleepy. In which a sleepy Noise is a cuddly Noise, never forget it.  (And he purrs too! Score!)

Noise is a show-off - so naturally that rubs off onto his partner as well. He loves showing you off and brags about your skills for you, exaggerating them only a tiny bit. (“Yeah, my partner just painted the Sistine Chapels, no big deal.” “Theo please-”). He always has a hand somewhere on you to as he doe so as well, just his sly way of saying that you're his. And forbid it if anyone talks smack towards you - they’ll receive a beating so hard it’ll make them come running back home to ma!

[Deviating a bit but just so you know, if you're trying out a new outfit - any outfit, a dress/suit, hell even something casual that shows a bit of skin, Noise is pulling out the whole heart-eyes, tongue rolling shebang!]

Still, despite his flaunting of you, he still gets horribly jealous. And by god is he horrible at hiding it too.  You could be talking to anyone - a old friend, coworker, hell some stranger - and suddenly here comes your man, walking up behind you and pulling you in close by your waist - and oh man, if he’s really jealous - will give you the smooch–st kiss imaginable before loudly announcing you as his partner. Worst part: He won’t ever admit he was jealous in the first place. What an guy can’t just kiss his partner? Man is he the worst at times. 

Goes over the top with dates (Fireworks, canons, vandalism - the whole deal!), and it's not a good date in his book if at least one person is not in critical condition (Your positive he has more counts of vehicular manslaughter from your dates then whatever illegal shit he committed in the Tower) … yeah might be best if you plan dates instead (and for the all the innocent pedestrians walk to your designated date.).

[theliterarywolf]

No it's even better they just straight up Isekai the actual author Osamu Dazai. Literally on the night he commits his lovers suicide by throwing themselves into a river during a storm truck Kun appears to vehicular manslaughter them to a fantasy land. They play on his obsessions with death and writing in the most hilarious ways.

God fucking DAMN IT, Truck-kun! What have I told you about your shenanigans?! This is why Pickle beat your ass and ate you alive in Baki!

[dirtytransmasc]

Ok but what do you think the experience of teaching the kids to drive was like for Alicole? I’m literally laughing at all of the images lollll

Alicole is gonna have some grey hairs after teaching 4 kids, their kids in particular, to put it one way.

all of them are, lovingly, nightmares when it comes to driving, and they give their parents a run for their money with how many ways they can be nightmares.

Aegon's a natural driver, he's just anxious as all hell, he has no trust in people or the rules of the road to actually keep him safe, he stalls and flounder's a lot, especially when crossing lanes of traffic to get somewhere. he's convinced driving is useless the first close call he experiences, cause this is just too dangerous and there are too many variables and people are stupid. but as time goes on and he is forced to drive more and more, his parents supporting him to just let himself get used to it, he begrudgingly goes for his permit and then his license, and while he's still an anxious driver, he doesn't mind it. (he likes driving late at night on back roads, cause there's never anyone out there). he definitely choked both his mum and his dad with his harsh stops, initiating the seat belt lock as they slam into them. Criston nearly lost it when Aegon stalled out on a 5-lane intersection, they don't like to talk about it.

Helaena is very literal when it comes to rules of the road. she's definitely like me when I first learned to drive, going exactly the speed limit, trying to drive straight by making sure her steering wheel is perfectly center instead of making little corrections here and there, so she ends up going more or less diagonally at times, a little heavy on the gas. plenty of things that makes her parent's anxious, especially cause a lot of people on the road get angry about her going "so slow". but once she gets the hang of it she's a good driver, though she prefer's to be a passenger princess, as she likes to be able to continue her daydreaming, and is a bit of a speed devil. definitely listens to audiobooks and bug documentaries in the car.

Aemond took forever to learn to drive, cause he not only had to learn the basics, but he had to learn to drive down an eye and with a bunch of driving accommodations. he's really committed and not all that bad at it, his parents anxiety mostly comes from the fact that he wants to drive a big ass truck and that he is a very confident driver with multiple large pinches of road rage. it's a lot less of them trying to teach him to drive, he picked that up over night, it's trying to keep him from committing vehicular manslaughter.

Daeron, like always, as he was raised by his siblings, picked up both the best and worst of them. He's very all or nothing, he's either going smooth and fast or slamming the breaks, super focused or his head's in the clouds, can be very apologetic on the road, but if he gets pushed around too much, he's going nuclear. he's truly their source of grey hairs, after Aemond, they make him wait till like... 18 or 19 to actually get his license, and it isn't helped by the fact that he's the baby of the family, so they're naturally a little overprotective. funnily enough, when him and his siblings are doing things they probably shouldn't, he's the designated driver, even prior to him getting his license (just wait till Alicole finds out they're going to have a stroke).

the kids all stressed them out, but they love them.

Bonus: The kids and their cars.

Aegon has an older Volvo sedan, it might have been golden at one point, but the paints worn to hell, so it's now a yellowy silver color, its like his baby, not in like... a car fanatic way, but in the teenage boy with his first care type of way... there's a difference I swear. its got black leather interior that he takes care of like his life depends on it, the passenger seat is only clean of trash for his sweet sister, the outside is all sorts of dinged and scratched (mostly prior to getting it) but he still takes it to get washed every two weeks, spends an hour in the self help section vacuuming it out and using all the sprays and tools. he defintly has to do a little dance to get it driving but he refuses to get rid of it till after the babes come and they need to upsize (he kept it and planned to give it to his kids when they got older, ignoring the fact it was pothole away from crapping out).

Helaena has a white kia soul, probably from the early 2000s. she saw it at a used car lot and liked 'face' it had (I think those cars look sorta... buggy? Idk I'm not a car person, it just felt like a car she'd float towards). takes good care of it, but isn't like Aegon. she keeps it clean, gets it cleaned once a month or two, and decorates the hell out of it. Crocheted steering wheel wrap, seat belt covers, seat covers, things to hang from her rear view mirror and hand holds, etc. (all the kids had her make ones for them too) and they're all bug/nature themed.

Aemond has a huge green truck, I'm talking diesel 4-door, you have to use the footstep to get into it and even then you need to like, pull on the seat to give yourself enough momentum. this thing is his baby, in the car freak sorta way. its getting cleaned every week, he puffs it and waxes it and does all that weird 30 different products, 12 microfiber towels, and a blood sacrifice shit car guys do. it has extra mirrors for him so he can see easier.

Daeron has a jeep, his car's newer, does basic upkeep on it, but is a little rough. he likes taking her (he definitely refers to his car as 'her' and 'she' and 'my girl') off road, likes taking his dog with him (mentioned in a previous post, he has a dalmatian) after going on hikes and to watering holes. she's seen some shit, is covered in a perpetual layer of dirt and dog hair, but he loves it. keeps the top of 90% of the year. his dog is his passenger princess. his siblings sit in the back 9/10 if Tess (his dog) is with them. only person who gets the dog booted is his mom and dad, and later on once they've grown a bit, his niece and nephew's. (I do think Daeron would be the sibling to fix up an older sports car, but I can't decide on what he would pick to fix up)