#he's like their little cat toy being batted around between them

[markantonys]

the forsaken are Extremely Normal about rand

[tainted-liquor]

☆‧₊˚Cat N' Spider ⋆.˚[1.7.24]- e42!Miles x Reader 🕸˖°.TWs || Miles is lowkey a pottymouthhh

What makes a villain? Is it their frigid, pompous attitude tailored to mask that sentimental wound from past trauma? Or is it the narcissistic qualities that wash away the blood of the innocent from their fleeting, voided sense of memory? No matter the man or lady behind the mask, they all unite under one common umbrella- shielding themselves from the icy rainwater that forces them to heed the treacherous callback from the rain…

A desperate covet to be acknowledged…no…remembered.

Villains aren’t born; they’re created. There was no such thing as “good” or “bad”, there was survival, and there were morals. And when you were only thirteen, you became the victim of a team of scientists determined to create a “better” world for you and the Brooklyn, New York population. So emerged Plan 42-J, where a spider was sucked up from your world and engineered on another.

And when that spider found itself back in your world, guess whose teeth it found refuge in?

Little old you!

“Yeah…I’ll be there at like seven. You want somethin’ from the store?” Your boyfriend, Miles grunted, his scarred and sculpted shoulder blades facing the camera as he made himself look presentable in his bathroom mirror. “Uhhh, you don’t have to…Actually, wait, get me a pineapple Fanta and some chips,” you muttered, tugging on your pretty little red Converse with as much force as physically possible. 

“Bet–...I might be a little late actually,” Miles sighed, turning around to face the camera and picking up his phone as he began to tap away at the miniature keyboard. Your face pulled into a deep frown, jet black brows furrowing as you pulled your face up from the invisible string connecting you and your shoelaces. “Miles, come on now…this is like the hundredth time you were late to shit we planned!” You grunted, rolling your eyes in slight sorrow and annoyance.

“I know, I know. I’ll try to wrap this shit up as fast as possible, I’m sorry mama” he sighed, running an exasperated hand across his face. “It’s just thirty minutes, ok?” He reassured, his gentle and wispy eyelashes batting softly as he toyed with the gifted gold-clad locket that nestled perfectly between his collarbones. You sighed, pressing the end-call button before falling backward on your couch, sinking into the comfy beige cotton and sighing deeply.

It wasn’t even 20 minutes before you were prompted to spring up from your couch, turning on the TV to monitor whatever was happening in Brooklyn today. Crime rates are dropping, cities are being rebuilt, and smiles are all around. A sense of gratitude washed over you– you weren’t too fond of being Spider-Girl ever since you found out about HQ, but it made ‘fixing’ your world much more satisfying.

But alas, good things don’t last forever. The news reporters' eyes widened as they cupped their ears with what looked like shock and fear, cutting themselves off mid-script to announce a new threat down Kings Plaza. “Oh hold on– give me just a second, Brent, but we’re just now receiving word that the infamous ‘Prowler’ has been spotted down at the abandoned Kings Plaza shopping outlet. Witnesses say he was seen breaking through the window of the old building, presumably chasing after a taller man.”

You groaned loudly, throwing two unfortunate pillows off the couch as you stomped back upstairs to throw on your crimson and white Spider-Suit. “Stupid fucking prowler…ruining my fuckin’ date night,” you grumbled, angrily pulling the mask over your face before calling out to your mom.  “Hey, mom? I’m gonna make a store run before Miles gets here! I'm gonna grab ingredients for cookies!” You shouted, quickly opening and closing the door so it’d seem like you left the house.

You slipped out the back window, climbing your way up the fire escape before swinging through the night, wind cascading across your masked face, taking deep gulps of air through your nostrils. Your blood boiled like overboiled soup stock, salt and muck bubbling to the surface as you grumbled under your breath. That stupid fuck ass had a habit of somehow ruining your quality time with your boyfriend, postponing dates and meetups in a futile attempt to put away your irksome ‘nemesis.’

You’ve had a couple of encounters with the Prowler, with him being the most determined villain since the ‘Rise of Spider-Girl’. Of all the many villains you’d put away, he seemed the most persistent in riding his wave of crime to fruition. The air, filled with its normal hubbub, voices clamoring together as car engines blended to create the everyday atmosphere of Brooklyn.

You dipped down in between the abandoned subway, scanning the topography of the old station before hearing an uncomfortably loud–

BANG! 

You got up on your feet, quickly scanning the areas as you attempted to squint through the thick veil of darkness that covered your eyes. The soft, meshy fabric of your red and white spider mask made everything increasingly more difficult as you attempted to analyze every small detail of your location. Blurry pipes, massive trash bags, debris, and a run-down train that had been claimed by rust and nature.

You walked down the wide tunnel, clicking on the flashlight that you had attached to your tactical belt a couple of months ago. You smiled to yourself, glad that one of the many trinkets you’d created since becoming Spider-Girl was proving to be useful. It was freezing, your jaw clenching as you lumbered forward, running your gloved fingertips across the rusty metal walls.

“Yo! Come on, man. I know you’re down here somewhere, and I don’t wanna be in this cold-ass tunnel!” You shouted, not even sure if you were actually talking to anyone else. “I mean, hero to…villain? Anti-Hero? I’m sure you’ve got people to get home to. And I’d hate to send your busted ass home to your wife and kids with new bruises,” You threatened, voice low and serious as you began to do another routine scan around your new surroundings. 

“My wife is none of your business,” A stern and rather agitated voice spoke from the far distance, causing you to whip your head around and assume a battle stance. You sucked in a large breath of air, lungs expanding and burning with each passing second as you ran forward at half your usual speed. “And I’m not going home with shit. From you.” He enunciated, the static overlay coating his voice like molten lava and burnt sugar.

“Man, wrap this up! All of the other villains are putting their shit away, why can’t you! Have you ever considered a job?” You spat, stopping mere inches away from the source of the loathsome voice before squinting up at the Prowler. “You’re the most desperate bitch I’ve ever fought with, you know that? I’ve never felt the need to prove something this bad,” You spat, growing more and more agitated by the second. 

“You funny as shit for real. Now If Ian have no human decency, I’d have been sent yo lil’ass to the hospital but ion put my hands on women cuz my daddy raised me betta’ than that. So we can do it like this– you can get the fuck out of my face and I can keep my hands to myself, or I can show all of Brooklyn how you nothin’ but a lil girl playing pretend in tight spandex,” He grunted, dropping down from the tall ceiling and hitting the ground with a sickeningly heavy thud.

His mask illuminated about 6 inches in front of him with bright purple, advancing towards you slowly as he invaded your personal space. You were sure that had he not worn his signature holographic mask, you would’ve felt his breath ghost the tip of your nose. He was so close you could lift a finger and make immediate contact with his chest.

“You piss me the fuck off.” You grunted, staring back at the monster in front of you as you let the thick, discomforting silence fill the lack of space between the two of you. He was menacing, it made you wanna get as far away from him as possible and go home to your kind, and loving boyfriend. But a job’s a job, no matter how intimidating the ‘client’.

“And you give me a fuckin’ headache. ¿Lo sabes, verdad?” He rasped, quickly landing a sharp blow straight to your gut as he sent you flying backward almost one foot. It hurt like hell, your stomach suddenly felt tight and uncomfortably empty as you struggled to regain control over your breathing. “Mira, me estás haciendo sentir mal. You think I wanna hit you?” he muttered, slowly backing away from you before taking off in the opposite direction.

What a fucking dickhead.

You swallowed the bile that threatened to erupt from your gullet, regaining your footing and taking off after the arrogant man once more. You focused on your breathing, drawing long and stable breaths that you allowed to ease the pain that plagued your gut. The wind whistled around your ears as you charged forward, gentle howls and soft rustles caressing your ears with each step.

You followed the harsh neon purple lighting, giggling slightly at how obvious was when you actually got up close to the guy and were able to see his mask. Your footsteps echoed across the tunnel, the heavy thuds mingling with your dull pitter-pattering as you managed to catch up to the unknown man, tackling him from behind as you made a futile attempt to pin him to the ground. And for a second it felt as though he had relaxed into your hold, his usual tense and guarded posture faltering for only a fraction of a second before you felt a painful grip on your wrist.

You went flying forward, narrowly avoiding landing on your neck as you scrambled to land on your feet. Throughout this entire confrontation, your spider-sense seemed to fail you time and time again to warn you of your opponent's attacks, making it increasingly harder to dodge any sort of blow he would deliver. Your right cheek, neck, shoulders, and gut all ached with pain as you struggled to memorize his attack pattern. 

He was unpredictable; switching his style of fighting with every new punch while you went through trial and error of pattern memorization. There were claw marks in your suit near your sides that revealed your skin as you finally found a solid fighting technique against the taller man. You finally found your perfect balance, landing disgustingly heavy blows to any part of him that you could reach.

He was lean. He may be built like a twig on the surface, but his entire body was fortified by nothing but pure muscle mass. He felt nearly hard to the touch as you threw your body weight into every strike. “You’re solid. You could put your…odd level of strength to much better use, c’monnnn,” you half-whined, groaning as you resorted to low blows and a style that consisted of legwork.

The white slits on his holographic mask narrowed, indicating his clear disgust as he jumped over your smaller form. “I have things to do. You’re in my way, little bug…” He spat, making a break for the surface as he ran onto the platform and seemingly glided up the stairs. Fuck, how annoying can someone get? He was faster than a bullet train and had incredible levels of stamina.

He was everything you needed in battle. Each time you found yourselves tangled in each other's path, there was an unexplainable tension that stuck each of you together with a bond stronger than any glue. Not to mention the way he managed to evade every single sense that spider had given you; almost like he wasn’t a threat.

You watched him dart up the block, getting ahead start on a taller building as he dug his claws into the sturdy brick. He climbed like a hungry panther chasing their next meal, starving for some sort of adrenaline as you followed closely behind him. The moon illuminated his figure in a ghostly white hue, highlighting the scratched metal of his suit components.

The frigid air left gentle kisses across your clothed limbs, provoking goosebumps as you pulled yourself up on the rough, concrete roof of some random building. You looked at the man, who rested an annoyed hand on his wounded shoulder as his mask mimicked an eye roll. “No quiero lastimarte. Pero, tengo una esposa en casa,” He grunted before quickly advancing towards you with pure anger.

Suddenly, as if they couldn't be late enough, that familiar tingle ran down your spine as you saw his next move in real-time before it happened. You grabbed his left wrist, which began to outstretch in your direction, and forced pressure onto his trigger point. He released a pained groan before you lunged forward, sending the two of you tumbling forward as something fell out of the collar of the neckline of his shirt.

The white eyes widened as a pretty little gold-clad heart locket dangled around his neck, spinning wildly before settling on his chest without so much as a sound. His eyes widened, kicking you off of him before tucking the locket back in his shirt with a relieved sigh and a silent prayer. “Weird. I gave that same locket to my boyfriend,” You muttered.

There was a low chuckle that sounded more annoyed rather than amused before he shuffled back to his feet and stood underneath the pale moonlight. “My wife gave this to me. Touch it, and i’ll fuckin’ kill you this time” he enunciated, a narrow squint to add insult to his words. “Anniversary gift. I hope you not trynna get personal, cuz I’m still gon whoop your ass”

The gears started turning in your brain as you stopped, your posture relaxing as your closed fist came to a rest on your upper left hip. “June 2nd?” You asked, eyes widening a fraction as you slowly backed away from…the boy? In front of you.

He stopped dead in his tracks, looking down at you with a mixture of confusion and fear before nodding slowly. “Yeah…why?” He murmured as he walked towards you, quickly closing any distance between you that you worked so hard to make. “Mozz?” You asked, gentle curiosity laced in your tone for the first time that night.

Miles looked dumbfounded. His sudden aura of anger and nonchalance melted before your very eyes before quiet forced giggles erupted from his throat. Quiet giddy chuckles quickly became cries, babbles of “I'm sorry” quickly leaving his lips as he lowered himself to the ground and became consumed by regret. “Ma I’m so fucking sorry I would’ve never put my hands on you…” he whispered, shaky breaths leaving his lips as you quickly came to his aid.

“Wait nononono don’t cry!” you pleaded, checking your surroundings to make sure there weren't any cameras, helicopters, or paparazzi before pulling off your mask. “This doesn’t even hurt! It’s fine! C’mon don’t cry, get up,” You pleaded as you scooped up your weeping boyfriend off the floor. His mask collapsed as he leaned into your hold, wetting your suit with salty tears as he grasped at your hand.

“It’s not fine! Since when is me hurting you fine!” He gasped, “I never wanted to do this prowler shit! I only did it so Mamí wouldn’t have to worry about bills…”  he confessed as you peppered gentle kisses to his face. You nodded as he came apart in your arms, feeling your heart shatter into a million pieces as he practically died upon hearing his nickname.

“Miles, I’m not mad! I know you wouldn’t ever hurt me. It’s my JOB to stop villains. It's YOUR job to…be a villain! I still don’t know what you do I’m sorry boo,” you confessed, giving his head gentle pats as he chuckled into your side. “I’m not no villain. I just do what people tell me,” he shrugged, pulling you down to the ‘ground’ with him.

“ ‘m sorry. You know that right? I’ll quit all of this prowler shit Ma I just never wanna hurt you again” he whispered, pressing his lips to yours and pulling you impossibly closer to him.

“You miss a date again and I’m turning you in,” you joked in between kisses.

“Yeah Yeah my bad”

Tags below <3333

@ashsostrange @chessbox @janaeby @faeriesoiree333 @fivestardior @an1bara @bachirasgoist @milesnanana77 @niaurluv @sp1derw1re @ban-al3x  @we-loveebony @kae2kaee @dxrlingcc @al3xwqz @l0starl @hobiebrownismygod @luv-kae @moriellis @daydreaming-en-pointe @malinashiftss @imjustagirlintheworld777 @edevotion

[cloakedsparrow]

The Batpups as Cat-Types

Upon coming to live with Bruce, Dick was like a fairly standard cat. He could alternate between cuddly darling and vindictive gremlin in the blink of an eye. One minute he’s snuggled next to Bruce while he reads the paper, the next, he’s holding eye contact while he pushes an expensive vase off a nearby table. He’ll be happily playing with one of the hundreds of cat-appropriate toys Bruce got him, then Bruce turns his back for five seconds and he’s somehow gotten himself perched atop the molding above the door. On top of this, Bruce had never owned a cat before so he did stupid new cat-owner shit like letting Dick wander around the neighborhood, where he caused tens of thousands of dollars in property damage and nearly got himself killed at least four times a day.

Jason was a loyal and completely domesticated house-cat who got tossed into the streets after his owner died. He adapted well for survival, but once he was brought indoors again, he was more than happy to curl up in a sunny spot and just vibe. He’d endured some trauma, so sudden loud noises or unknown individuals trying to pet him resulted in him hissing and darting under the nearest table or hiding behind the books on the shelves. Around those he trusted, however, he was a sweet, chill cat. Unfortunately, Bruce assumed all cats were gremlins like Dick, and that Jason would have the potential to be even worse due to being on the streets, and so responded as though Jason were a gremlin-cat whenever he did something unexpected. This led to a lot of misunderstandings and resentment.

Everyone assumed Tim was well domesticated due to living in a nice house before coming to them. In reality, he’d been taken away from his mother too soon and left alone in a huge house that he eventually discovered how to come and go from on his own. This meant that he was, in fact, a feral kitten who had just learned not to do certain things in front of people, lest they get angry at him. He did manage to meow and swat at Bruce until the man slept, ate, and bathed like a normal person, so Alfred and Dick didn’t feel too bad about their mistake in insisting Bruce bring the tiny feral beast into the house. He also made friends with a bunch of other feral kittens, so most of his feral shenanigans occurred with them, away from anything resembling responsible supervision.

Cassandra was a stray cat that followed Bruce home one day and then claimed the whole family as hers. She was good with them, but anyone else who tried to touch her (or the boys when it looked like they didn’t want it) pulled away a bleeding limb. Also, the family quickly learned that letting her food bowl go empty would result in her stealing any food left out, even a whole chicken or hamburger. She still caused less damage than Dick, so Bruce didn’t even bat an eye at half the shit she did. He did have to instill some long-forgotten survival instincts in her, though.

Damian was like that kitten in the Aristocats who paints but also hisses and spits and thinks himself a tough alley cat when he’s actually a pampered kitten. No one ever bothers to correct him and just generally ignores his more violent ways…or worse, thinks they’re cute. Tim gets sick of the little shit drawing his blood eventually and starts hissing back and swatting him whenever he tries it. Eventually, he calms down enough to do more painting and hissing than clawing, at least with the family. They call it a win and they all learn to live together.

[vampcubus]

Roommate!Kyojuro who’s been your best friend since Pre-K. You know each other inside and out, down to your usual orders and all your favorite restaurants. 

Roommate!Kyojuro who brings you food whenever he stops to grab takeout, always thinking of you and what you’d want. Haven’t eaten lunch yet? He’s driving up to your work so you can eat in his car. Falling asleep during college classes? He’ll show up with your favorite coffee order.

Roommate!Kyojuro who can read your mood with a single look and knows exactly what to say to get you cracking up. He’s emotionally intelligent and gives you massive side eye if you try to lie and say you’re feeling fine when you’re clearly not.

Roommate!Kyojuro who makes you do silly TikToks with him and has countless random pictures of you doing the most mundane shit in his camera roll. Most of the photos he takes are ruined somehow; there’s always a glare of light or you move at the last moment. Among those god-awful cryptid pics are albums upon albums of pictures of you two together. All photos from trips you’ve taken, those impulsive 3 am outings, and movie nights with you passed out on his shoulder.

Roommate!Kyojuro who sends you a meme when you’re both supposed to be asleep just to hear you laugh through the wall separating your rooms.

Roommate!Kyojuro who pokes his head into the kitchen the moment he hears pots and pans being moved around. “What’re you cooking?” 

Roommate!Kyojuro who relies on you for meals that aren’t takeout since he’s a pretty crummy cook, and though you’ve made progress teaching him, his rice still comes out crunchy and he overcooks most other things. Whenever you’re away for a few days he sends you pics of the meals he attempts by himself seeking your approval. Pls tell him his grilled cheese looks amazing, he’s so proud of it.

Roommate!Kyojuro who will actually RKO you if you even try to do the dishes. “You go through the trouble of cooking for me every day. I don’t want you to even look at those dishes, you hear me?” And if he finds out you did them, you’re in for an earful.

Roommate!Kyojuro who would never force you to come to the gym with him but always insists that he come along when you go. His close proximity wards off creeps and he’s an amazing hype man so you never complain, but he genuinely just wants to make sure you’re safe while you’re there.

Roommate!Kyojuro who cuddles with you on the couch and gets sucked into your tv dramas. He has the funniest reactions to shady moments and fights. He never fails to fall asleep at integral moments and needs to be briefed again, but acts so betrayed when he catches you watching them without him.

Roommate!Kyojuro who gets into crochet and makes you cute little plushies and socks. He’s SO proud to present his first full blanket to you and melts into a puddle whenever he finds you snuggled up with it.

Roommate!Kyojuro who has a bit of a “stray problem” and is always feeding the stray cats that roam around your apartment complex. At least two or three of them have become 100% indoor cats and he considers them his children. Takes them to get all their shots, sends you clips of them doing silly stuff while you’re at work, and crochets toys for them. He tears up when the most aloof kitty starts batting one of the crochet mice around. Sends you a frantic text of “HE TOUCHED IT!!!” 

Roommate!Kyojuro who mindlessly tosses your laundry in with his if he sees it building up.

Roommate!Kyojuro who sneaks your shampoo because he likes the way you smell and acts dumb when you complain about running out so fast.

Roommate!Kyojuro who respects you too much to steal your panties when they get mixed in with his laundry but desperately humps into his fist later that night to thoughts of you filling them. A hand clapped over his mouth to smother his loud whimpers so he doesn’t alert your sleeping form through the paper-thin wall between your rooms. 

Roommate!Kyojuro who wants to tell you how everything you do inadvertently turns him on, but would rather die than risk fucking up your friendship.

Roommate!Kyojuro that always cums with your name on his lips without fail, golden-red eyes rolled back as he fantasizes about your hands replacing his own. 

Roommate!Kyojuro who never forgot the time you were dared to kiss at a party in high school. The soft press of your plush lips against his trembling ones has been burnt into his mind, always surfacing when he’s rutting into a pillow, pretending it's you. He imagines kissing you so often it’s a wonder you don’t see the way his eyes stare at your lips when you drink from a straw or chew at a pen.

Roommate!Kyojuro who would do anything for you, but selfishly wishes you'd see him as more than a friend.

[ohhcinnybuns]

got new kitty headcanons for you:

Dazai the owner this time of catChuu. Catchuu's more of a sassy, spoiled cat and he likes to do his own thing.

Dazai bought him a really, really nice collar that cost him an entire paycheck because he couldn't resist. A collar made of real leather with little sky-blue jewels embedded in them that bring catchuu's eyes out 🥹

Dazai's tried playing with him, but Chuuya just looks away and turns his nose up whenever Dazai waves around feather toys. Dazai usually has to bribe him with catnip.

Catchuu prefers sunbathing by the windows and enjoying the feel of the sun on his fur. When it's wintertime, he's more likely to want to curl up on top of Dazai or in a pile of blankets. He'll hog an entire pile and bat at Dazai with his paws if Dazai dares to come close. (Catchuu never uses his claws, but the threat makes Dazai cave)

Chuuya really loves baths. 😭 he loves being groomed and pampered in general, and has a preference for Dazai's human hands doing the grooming instead of cleaning his own fur with his tongue

They bond over it. Dazai's sitting on the floor in a towel after getting down with his shower while he's bathing catchuu in the tub.

Catchuu likes climbing on things, but he'll climb REALLY high. He'll jump on top of the fridge if Dazai lets him and try to get as high as he can. And then he won't come down because he likes the view.

He'll nap in some of the weirdest places. Dazai's caught Chuuya curled up in the closet, in a tiny crack between the washer and dryer, on top of the cabinets in the kitchen, and of course under the bed.

CATCHUU KITTY CANONS! I love them all. I need to pet this catchuu but he'd probably bat at me :') The bejeweled collar for cat!chuu would be so fitting for a spoiled king. ✨

I think my headcannons for cat!chuu would be that he would be the kind of kitty that has that hot and cold personality. Like, "Oh, you want to pet me? Well, I'll be a singular inch away from your touch, so no. Work harder. You come to me." Or the really affectionate for two seconds but then hisses to not touch him anymore but comes two seconds later again for more pets 🥹

He LOVES heights because he can't have anyone else having the high ground, and he also LOVES baths (especially with human Dazai) because Dazai is extra gentle and pets him behind the ears to relax and coax him. Kitty Chuuya also likes to play with Dazai's bandages because they resemble ribbons, and Dazai can pull them out whenever Chuuya wants to play. Very convenient for him. Catchuu claims a mountain of Dazai's clothes and kneads into them and scents them so Dazai can't put them in the washer because that's now his spot. Dazai can't take him otherwise, cat! chuu will lay on his face at night or around his neck like a scarf, which only makes Dazai laugh anyway because Chuuya's fur tickles his nose, lol.

I can talk about them for hours!!! I NEED TO HUG CATZAI AND CATCHUU FOR INSPIRATION! I will scream it to heavens every.DAY!

[spacenintendogs]

for your modern AU:

first off, I love it, inject it into my bloodstream please.

do the dragons like squeaky cat toys. Pls I need to know -

do they, like, randomly chew on stuff.

Are there any important things the riders need to hide from the dragons to prevent the above from happening?

KAJDKSJDJSJ thank u so much!!!!!!!

as for the cat toys!!! it depends on the dragon :)

toothless?? absolutely. hiccup doing that thing with his metal tools reflecting light & toothless chasing it?? absolutely. toothless is very Cat™️. he likes chasing small puff balls, hiccup gets one of those feather toys on a pole, squeaky mouse toys, etc. altho he'd much prefer to catch & eat actual mice... but yea he likes squeaky cat toys the most

deadly nadders like stormfly are more similar to parakeets/parrot like birds in stature! talking to her so she tries to mimic is smth she loves!!! BUT!! stormfly still loves playing fetch!! she also just likes games in general!!! hiding her toy so she finds it, etc!!! she likes little bells too. she also enjoys playing with astrid's braid when she sits on astrid's shoulder. she likes playing with string :) and she's a shredder.

monstrous nightmares like hookfang like to rough house like dogs & cats! pinning the horns down & stuff!! also a tugger!! play tug of war with him!! but like a cat he is a climber. think abt hookfang climbing the arena chains!!! he's like a bat sometimes!! likes scaring ppl!! also helps toothless chase mice. surprisingly tho he likes clinging to snotlout's back and front. also he's a shredder.

meatlug is the most like a dog!! she loves playing fetch (pls think abt her little tail wagging with her big ol eyes as she pants bc she's excited bc she wants the ball!! god my heart). she gets winded a little quicker due to being u know. a solid rock. but!! she loves cuddling!! a lap girlie for sure!!! also if anyone is a chewer, it's her. u gotta watch your shoes around her!!!!

barf and belch play with each other & enjoy chasing!! chase a ball, a stick, the twins, another dragon, etc!! they want to be chased too!! they are ambush predators so anything that'll activate that too!!!! putting your hand under a blanket and moving it quickly back and forth will get them to run & bat at it like a cat!! they also enjoy hopping between ruff & tuff's shoulders!!!

as for things that need to be hidden: shoes, any paper materials, any jackets, & fabric in general. sometimes the shirt they're wearing gets shredded bc the dragons felt like it. snotlout especially ends up with shredded t-shirts. the gang has to watch where they set their backpacks down!! also sometimes dangly shiney earrings will get a pounce or two at them!!!!

also probably don't have an actual cat or dog near the dragons until they're good & trained 😭

[bitchkay]

Came back for more Voleri family shenanigans. Assuming Robin is still with MC, how well does he get along with the kids? Does he have any favourite siblings?

omg hii😄 you like my sillies??👁👁

Me rn ^^

Robin is everyones favorite cat‼

The elder twins usually steal him for pets and he'll never complain about that! He also spends alot of time with the younger twins for naps but it was like that when all of the kids were babies

Hes like their cuddly support cat❤

When all of the kids were babies Robin would cuddle up to them when they're sleeping and nap with them with one wing wrapped around them🥺

It was like he was protecting them♡

Robin actually knew you were pregnant before you did

You got pregnant not long after you got married and you and Rio were crowned and for a little while he was really clingy and cuddly toward your stomach but he couldn't name the reason he was so drawn to it, you just thought he was being extra clingy towards you

Low and behold you have a bun in the oven!

Robin was the first to hear your babies heart beats❤

You're little bat cat was so excited to learn you were having a baby and was an excellent companion throughout all 4 of your pregnancies when Rio couldn't always be at your side

Robin primarily sleeps in your room with you and Rio but as your families got bigger it seems Robin always had his spot in each of your kids rooms

Fun fact, the elder twins shared a room up until they were 10 and they fought over who's room Robin would sleep in(even though at this point yall had 6 kids and Robin would most often be with Atlas in his room cus he was a baby)

Robin likes hanging out with Halo alot cus shes a bit on the softer cutesy side than her other siblings and she always has a soft fluffy pillow for Robin to lay on and Robin likes watching her dance too♡

Robin also loves playing w Theo they frolic together alot and Theo likes going outside, he likes naturey things☆

One time it started raining outside and you looked out the window to see them both dancing in the rain, it was cute seeing them have fun, what wasn't cute was both of them coming back inside sopping wet, shivering with a runny nose. As much as Robin dosen't like baths he thought he deserved that punishment knowing he probably shouldn't have done that, he and theo shared a bath tho and played with all his little bath toys and boats♡

The younger twins love Robin so much😄☆

You know how Nica and Robin were pretty much attached to each other in Rios book 2

Imagine that but there 2 of her☆☆

As we know Dylan and Eliana were "accidents" (blame rio for giving you the best birthday sex of your life--) and theres and 8 year age gap between them and Atlas so while Robin is still everyones favorite companion it's been a while since he was a little ones cuddle buddy

Hes their little guy♡

While Robin is an older cat at this point hes still very healthy and very nurturing and gentle with the babies, he still likes to play albeit a little less often and still considers himself your loyal protector to you and your "kittens"

Robin loves having a big family

He prides himself on being your "first child" and tells stories to the kids about the two of you from the past

He'll also never let anyone believe they are unloved, especially since you adopt, he loves each and every part of your "litter" and shows them they are as part of the family as he is

The kids love mommy's magic bat cat❤❤

☆𝕋𝕙𝕣𝕖𝕖'𝕤 𝕒 𝕔𝕣𝕠𝕨𝕕, 𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣'𝕤 𝕒 𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕪 + 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕗𝕒𝕞𝕚𝕝𝕪 𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕤 𝕞𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥

[clumsiestgiantess]

I’ve been working on some DNAliens stuff recently and realized I don’t have a height chart with all of them together, just them beside human height for reference.  So, in case anyone wants to know a bit about all the DNAlien ocs I have, as well as their heights, here’s a little guide.  (Illustrations to be added over time; I’ve posted a few on my blog already)

Now without further ado..

A quick guide to all the DNAliens that live/have lived on earth

Tselani (aka my self-insert with a separate backstory): Her three mutations are human, ancient ground bat, and kentrosaurus.  She lives in the dense cold forests between Canada and North America, and has the ability to reanimate corpses by combining what’s left of them.  After the village she cared for was destroyed in the War, she settled down in the Rocky Mountains as a suitable refuge from humankind.  She’ll occasionally reveal herself to or befriend them if they seem kind enough.

Jactol: His three mutations are gorgonopsid, anomalocaris, and DNAlien.  He lives in a deep cave system beneath South Africa, and has the ability to exhale a heavy noxious gas that will rapidly choke victims to death.  A misunderstanding between him and Tselani caused them to fall out of love.  After nearly being poached by humans, he grew a hatred and now vindictiveness for them, and will often toy with and torture any that cross his path before he inavitably kills them.

Aethra: Her three mutations are jerboa, cuttlefish, and DNAlien.  She lives in a large open cavern within the southeast section of the Himalayan Mountains, and has the ability to manipulate a creature’s desires.  She's like a cat lady but with humans, and keeps a minimum of three or four of them in her home at one time.  Unfortunately, she takes them against their will and many of them don’t want to be there.

Eracin: Her three mutations were screech owl, snow leopard, and Terrinu (a creature not native to Earth).  She roamed the Eurasian Steppe until settling down with Aethra, and had the ability to slow time with her heartbeat.  Her and Aethra kept humans safe during the War, but unfortunately they were attacked and Eracin laid down her life to give Aethra and the humans time to flee.  Unlike her lover, Eracin viewed humans as intelligent beings in their own right — on a similar level as her own kind.

Vremonl: During his brief time on Earth, he only took one mutant strand besides his own DNAlien one, a chausie cat.  He stayed around an ancient city in Egypt that sat near the Nile, and has the ability to morph additional limbs along his body.  He only stayed on Earth for several centuries to study various types of the planet's natural fauna before returning to Firsthome.

Helleia: Her three mutations are human, tussock moth, and locust.  She lives in the swampy everglades of Florida, and has the ability to infect living things with her hivemind that she can instruct with simple directions.  One of her favorite pasttimes is taking unsuspecting humans into her domain, luring them to herself with a proposed relationship.  She’ll occasionally take the time to build relationships with humans, but it's a facade; her abilities work stronger on those who have emotional ties to her.

Tserem: His three mutations are human, eastern brown snake, and arthropleura.  He is a wanderer and doesn’t have a definitive home, though he does tend to shelter in places where other DNAlien friends reside.  He has the ability to quickly expel any ailments or illnesses.  Tserem used to live in Central Europe with a beloved human, but he hasn’t stayed in a single place for very long since her passing.

Xr: Their three mutations are jaguar, toucan, and DNAlien.  They live in the craggy mountains of the South American rainforest, and have the ability to infect beings with disease by looking at them.  Xr has been living in the same place for epochs as he is older and isn’t interested in finding any other place to live.  He has a fairly large cult of natives who have been worshiping him and keeping him alive for generations.

Kraken: His three mutations are human, giant squid, and megalodon.  He lives deep in the Atlantic Ocean avoiding any human contact, and has the ability to generate and manipulate water and wind currents.  Ever since he was betrayed by the group of pirates he worked for, he’s been in hiding from humans.  However, he understands that not all humans are cruel and will act kindly towards them unless hostility is shown.

Corven: His three mutations are human, bold jumping spider, and plourdosteus fish.  He lives in an open cavern in the Mexican desert, and has the ability to bind two beings in an unbreakable oath that shuts down the oath-breaker’s internal systems for periods of time.  In his younger years, his rare ability gave him a quick rise to fame, but a quick rise to burnout as well.  He lives on Earth to hide from his fame, and later humanity as well, but will still give out binding deals to those who manage to find him.

Harneon: His three mutations are human, grizzly bear, and woolly rhinoceros.  He lives in the open grasslands of North America, and has the ability to stimulate muscle tissue to go above and beyond its limitations.  While his home is here, he often takes extended vacations to several other planets.  Rumor has it that he has several other ongoing relationships that he participates in on each planet, and Earth is his getaway from all of them.

Enercill: Her three mutations are human, jackrabbit, and killer lizard (a species not native to Earth).  She has the ability to hide her third mutation and mutate between two forms at will.  Enercill travels between largely-populated human cities, thriving off clubbing and nightlife there.  Underground, she’s made quite the name for herself, and people come from all places to.. spend time with her.

Siem: Her three mutations are human, sturgeon, and dunkleosteus.  She lives in the place humans call the Bermuda Triangle, and has the ability to magnetize her body.  Commonly she uses her ability to hunt down shining metals, and is an avid collector of anything with bright colors or shining properties.  Occasionally she’ll kidnap humans who are artisans and keep them on deserted islands like pets to make her more valuables.

Wraith: His two mutations are deinonychus and DNAlien.  He lives off-world, and has the ability to combust as well as be completely fire-resistant.  He was an avid supporter of the ‘humankind are subservient animals’ group during the War, and ruled over a large civilization before he was bested by Atnoir, who was fighting for the ‘equal rights of humans’ group during the War.

Atnoir: His three mutations are saichania, woolly mammoth, and human.  He lives near the arctic circle to steer clear of any humans, and his ability is heightened senses, which comes in handy when you’re the size of a small mountain.  Before the War, Atnoir used to live in Northern Europe where he took care of many human civilizations, and fought for them in the War.  However, he has banished himself to a human-less place after even his own humans turned on him.

Orner: Their three mutations are human, anaconda, and elasmosaurus.  They live between several uninhabited islands of Japan, and they have the ability to multiply their body like a single cell organism, and regroup.  They’re a trickster at heart who overall means no harm, but once in a while they take things a little too far.  They've befriended several humans, but usually gets them killed accidentally.

Orin: His three mutations are maned wolf, flying squirrel, and moray eel.  He lives in the mountains of Alaska, and has the ability to connect and disconnect beings’ consciousnesses.  He can cause both mass hysteria and deep emotional connections within the network of beings he connects, but has no way of controlling what actually happens.  His altruistic tendencies often backfire, and even his own kind are wary of him.

Arn: Her three mutations are human, roe deer, and stone pine.  She’s one of the few DNAliens to ever mutate with a plant; while it is possible it’s hardly ever practical.  She lives in a forest near the Mediterranean coast, and has the ability to coax plants into growing incredibly fast.  She's always been extremely docile and elusive.  Back when humans believed in benevolent mythical beings, she traded plants with people to better her large garden.  She still tends to it to this day in honor of her beloved, who courted her and helped her tend to the garden when it was still small.

If you have any questions about any of my ocs, leave me an ask!  I’m more than happy to rant about them, or draw you a sketch! Most of them have full background stories I plan to write one day, like Tserem’s and Tselani’s, but these are just quick rundowns of each

[theimpurelily]

Under the Green Umbrella Trees

Word Count: 3 ,855

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Riftan was starting to understand why Maximilian was so agitated. He hadn't felt this nervous in years.   

He had tried to find a way to wrap the gift, but the merchant didn’t have anything that he deemed good enough and all of Riftan's clothes still smell like horses despite being washed. It left him just holding it, fiddling with the thick chain as he made his way towards the garden.   

He could almost feel his stepfather’s words creeping into his mind as a little part of him wished she wasn’t there. It would give him the chance to chuck the damn thing deep into the woods where no one would find it and leave it at that. But he shook it off. Riftan swore to himself he would give her something and so he would. Who knows, maybe she would like it.   

I can afford to keep looking up, even for just a little while.    

Riftan’s pace slowed down a little as he heard a familiar giggle coming from the garden. The sweet sound of her laughter made him forget about his worries and he softly smiled while making his way around the annex.   

When he saw her in the garden he started to chuckle. lady Maximilian, daughter of a powerful duke, was currently sitting on the ground and using a long piece of grass to play with that same large cat. Whenever she brought the ‘toy’ up in the air the cat jumped to bat at it causing the lady to burst into giggles. It completely contrasts the vision of her as a child, with a melancholy face as she hugged the hunting hound.   

He was tempted to just sit down and watch the joyful scene from afar, but he knew better. Soon the bell would ring out again. It may call out throughout the day but during these moments between them it was his enemy, calling her back to the castle where he would have to wait yet again to have some time alone with her.   

Before he could even get a chance to announce his presence, Maximilian looked up from playing and spotted him. At first, she looked panicked, but it quickly turned into a smile. It was unbelievable and the thought of her smiling every time they met made him so damn happy.    

Maximilian quickly abandoned the ‘toy’ and made her way towards him with the cat quickly chasing after her. Both nearly forgot their formalities as they clumsily greeted each other.   

“Forgive me my lady, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Riftan said with a smirk while looking down at the cat pawing at the hem of her dress.   

“Oh, we h-have been...p-playing for a-a wh-while...now.” His smirk turned into a smile as Maximilian started to gently sway, causing the hem of her dress to move much to the cat's delight.   

“What time do you normally come out here?”   

“Oh.” Her movements stopped as she began to play with some of her hair. “W-well...it d-depends.”   

“On?”   

She stayed quiet for a moment, making Riftan more than a little curious.   

“On wh-when m-my...ha-handmaids leave me on...m-my own.” She looked away while answering, but he could clearly see the frustrated look on her face.   

Her answer didn’t make much sense, why on earth would a lady follow her maid’s orders?   

“You can’t just order them away? You’re their lady.”   

She gave a small shrug as her messing with her hair became a little more flustered causing the curls to poof up a little.   

“Th-they....th-they’re v-very...pr-protective of...me.”   

Riftan’s thoughts from the other night of her health came back in force, causing that knife in his heart to twist even further.   

How ill is she?    

“D-do y-you...you come h-here every day?”   

Her innocent question cut him off before he could ask about her health. When his mind processed what she had asked Riftan could feel his face get warm and he coughed into his fist. Suddenly he regretted his earlier question.   

Seeming to figure it out for herself, the lady started to blush herself and put her hands up in defense.   

“I'm...I’m...s-so s-sorry S-sir Riftan. I... did I... I w-wanted to f-finish your g-gift before-   

“It's okay.” he quickly said, hand twitching to reach out and hug her to calm her down. But he shook off the impulse. “I... enjoy walking.”   

Both stood in silence at that comment, and he felt the blush coming back.   

That sounded fucking stupid.    

“I have an idea.” Riftan shifted his feet before taking a step closer to her. “You don’t want your maids to know of this, right?” He tried not to cringe at his wording, it made him sound like a creep. But if his idea worked it would mean more time with her.   

Maximilian looked back at the castle, as if all the talking of her maids would make them magically appear in the garden. Seeing that the coast was clear she turned back towards him she nodded.   

“We see each other nearly every day in the halls.”   

She blushed and nodded again, making him smile.   

“Then why don’t we do this.” He took another step closer to her and watched her hands as she started to play with her hair again. “When I ask you how you are, mention the weather if you’re going to be in the gardens. I’ll come here around this...no.” he shook his head; the bell was bound to ring out soon. “I’ll be here earlier than I was today. How’s that?”   

She seemed to think it over, making him nervous all over again until she smiled and nodded.   

“I’d...l-like th-that.”   

Relief settled over Riftan until he remembered the necklace in his hand. Clearing his throat, he shifted a bit where he stood.   

“I got you something.”   

The smile on her face turned into surprise and she shook her head, causing her hair to be freed from her hands.   

“Y-you d-didn’t...need to-to-”   

“I wanted to.” Riftan quickly interjected; it felt weird to say that, but it was the truth. He moved to hand the necklace to her but stopped as he remembered something.   

“Turn around.”   

Most Ladies would admonish him for ordering her in such a way, but Maximilian only gave him a questioning look before doing as he said. It made him feel oddly warm.   

He had to swallow a few times before reaching out a shaking hand to brush the red curls over her shoulder. It was incredibly soft and surprisingly light. He loved how there seemed to be different types of curls hidden in her hair, some wavy while others in tiny coils that perfectly wrapped around his finger.   

Riftan nearly forgot what he had wanted to do until Maximilian looked over her shoulder at him.   

“Sir Riftan?”   

Quickly, Riftan cleared his throat and moved to place the necklace around her slender neck. He was thankful for how easy the chain was to hook considering how badly his hands shook. When he deemed it secure Riftan lowered his hands back to his side and waited in anticipation. He couldn’t see her face but was able to watch as she reached up to touch the stone, rubbing her thumb over it just as he did.   

I wonder if she noticed it too.    

The thought made him smirk until he heard a little hiccup from her.   

Shit! Did I offend her? Does she hate it that much?   

He felt panicked and the warmth he once had turned to ice. Of course, she wouldn’t, what lady would want such a tacky-   

“Th-thank you.”   

His thoughts grounded to a halt at the sound of her voice. Slowly, the lady turned around to face him and she was smiling, truly genuinely smiling despite having tears in her eyes.   

How in the hells could a cheap necklace make her that happy? He couldn't wrap his head around it and started to rub the back of his neck, keeping his hand busy instead of reaching out to brush the tears off her cheek.   

“My apologies, it’s not-”   

She quickly shook her head while wiping away her tears, as if she could tell it was tempting him.   

“No, I... l-love it. Th-”   

Her words were cut off by the chiming of that damn bell, but Riftan was a little happy to see she looked as disappointed as him for the interruption.   

Feeling a little more selfish than normal, Riftan held onto her hand a little longer after kissing it, running his thumb over her knuckles. He watched as she smiled up at him before lowering his eyes to look at the necklace. It was strange how nice it looked on her. Its rough texture and dark colors contrasted against her alabaster skin beautifully.   

Riftan slowly released her hand and began to turn away until he noticed her taking a step forward then stopping with a frustrated look. She was actually starting to pout while fiddling with the pendent.   

Fuck, she’s adorable.   

“My lady?” He was trying his best not to laugh at her behavior but ended up chuckling at her next comment making her blush.   

“Y-you're too...t-tall.”   

“I’m sorry?”   

“W-would...S-sir Riftan, p-please um...” she kept fumbling with her words as her blush deepened until she huffed and shyly motioned for Riftan to lower himself.   

If any other noble were to ask him that he would tell them no in a way that would leave Triton smacking him on the back of the head, but this was her, so he did.   

Giving Maximilian a curious look, Riftan moved to kneel in front of the lady now causing him to have to look up at her. Her free-flowing hair fell over her shoulders as she looked down, her hands going from playing with the necklace to pulling on her sleeves again as she took a step towards him.   

The whole world around Riftan seemed to freeze as her face came closer to his. He couldn’t think or dare to move. All he could do was close his eyes and focus on the feeling of her hair ticking his face. Normally, he would hate the touch of some women’s hair against his cheek, that had been ruined years ago. However, any bitter memories of that feeling were quickly erased by the smell of Maximilian’s perfume surrounding him and the warm brush of her lips against his cheek.   

Riftan wasn’t sure if the lady quickly took a step back out of embarrassment or due to him shooting back up to his feet. All he was sure of was that he stupidly thanked her while watching the damn cat rubbing against his boot.   

If she had said anything back it was drowned out by the sound of his own heartbeat and when she quickly left him alone Riftan took some steps back until he hit a tree. Slowly, the stunned knight slid down until he hit the ground. Someone could come by and tell him his castle had crumbled, his lands salted, and his sword stolen, and it still wouldn’t be able to distract him from the fact that lady Maximilian Croyso had just kissed him.  

Riftan sat there in silence as he covered his eyes with his hands. His face was starting to hurt with how much she was making him smile. 

The next morning as Riftan passed by lady Maximilian in the halls she made sure to comment on how windy it was. 

He felt rather satisfied with the idea working. Allowing him to enjoy the cool breeze with Maximilian close beside him as they sat behind the tree line on his cloak. Smiling, Riftan looked over at the lady holding that cat again like it was an infant while wearing the necklace he gave her. He could die right then and there and feel content with life.  

“I don’t think I've ever seen a cat being held like that before.”   

“H-he's a t-terrible...mouser. Poor th-thing would s-starve if I... didn’t f-feed him.” she said while cooing at the cat before rubbing her cheek against the top of its fuzzy head. The lady was rewarded with a loud purr.  

“Perhaps feeding him is the reason why he won't do his job.” 

“No... maybe, b-but just l-look at h-him.” Maximilian held up the loudly purring cat for Riftan to see. As if witnessing the thing being fawned over by the lady would garner any sympathy from him. If anything, her doting on the cat only made Riftan feel like an idiot for being jealous of the damn thing.  

"From how he fawns over you, I see that saying is true for cats as well.” he grumbled 

“Wh-what saying?”   

Shrugging, Riftan leaned farther back against the tree while stretching out his long legs.  

“Way to a man's heart is through his stomach, guess it’s true for cats.”   

Maximilian glanced down at the purring fluff, looking to be deep in thought before speaking up.  

“Is th-that true?”

“Most of the time.” he said with a light chuckle.  

They sat in a calm silence as the wind started to pick up, causing the light peeking through the leaves above to shift and dance around them. Riftan contentedly watched as the lady brushed her windblown hair out of her face before braiding it. The movement of the red curls seemed to perk the cat up as it started to paw at the strands.  

Damn cat doesn’t know how good he has it.   

His eyes travel from her slender fingers moving the curls in a rhythmic pattern up to where the necklace sat perfectly above the neckline of her dress. He couldn’t help but notice that the fabric she was wearing matched some of the bronze hues in the metal. It made him want to buy her more jewelry...which reminded him.  

“What do you like?”   

“P-pardon?”   

“I'm assuming you don’t just wander around the castle or sit in the garden all day. What do you like to do?”   

“I... like...e-embroidering and r-reading.”   

He didn’t know shit about embroidering so any gift related to that was out of the question. Books, however, that he could work with.  

“What do you like to read?”   

Maximilian gave a small shrug while struggling with her curls. “A-anything...mostly h-history.” She stopped messing with her hair and looked up at the rustling leaves. “I... e-enjoy p-poems and... l-literature from th-the R-Roemian Empire.” She smiled softly while stealing a quick glance from him before looking back at the cat. “I a-also enjoy l-learning about...places I-I’ve never b-been...before.”   

Riftan got the sudden urge to take Maximilian to Anatol, if only to go riding with her to show off his lands when the wildflowers were in full bloom. He was also pleasantly surprised by what she liked to read. He tried to think back to the collection of books he had back home. The library had old books that were once owned by the Roemian knight who had ruled Anatol and Ruth had been spending any money he could on either his tower or building up the library. So, there was a good chance there could be books she would enjoy. The more he thought of her coming to Anatol the more his shoulders dropped. It would be a cold day in all the hells before the duke would allow that.  

I might never see her again after this.   

Swallowing down the lump in his throat, Riftan tried to think of something more pleasant.  

“Here I thought most noble ladies read those frilly romance books.”   

Her soft smile shifted into a look of embarrassment and her cheeks turned a light shade of pink.   

“I-I s-s-suppose...y-yes.”   

He quickly noticed the sudden increased stuttering and blush. He wondered how much fun it would be to tease her. Leaning closer to the lady Riftan smirked, he could swear she leaned in as well.  

“Read any of those?” he asked in a low voice which caused Maximilian to quickly scoot away from him.  

“Y-you sh-shouldn’t ask a l-lady such th-th-things!”   

Riftan barked out a laugh, he’d never seen someone turn so red so fast before.  

“Forgive me, my lady.” God, he loved making her flustered and noticed she didn’t deny it. Riftan no longer wondered what fun teasing her would be, now he wanted to know what books the lady had been reading to make her blush such a pretty shade of red.  

God she’s adorable when she pouts.   

Feeling some pity for Maximilian, Riftan decided to save the question for a later date.  

“What have you read lately?”   

The more innocent question seemed to calm her down a little, though there was still a tint of pink to her face.  

“Oh...w-well...I s-started to r-read about...w-wyverns.”   

Well, he didn’t expect that.  

“My lady, don’t tell me you’re planning on hunting more sub-dragons.” 

She smiled and shifted a little where she sat, petting the cat who slowly crept back onto her lap, having previously jumped out of it due to Riftan’s laughter.  

“N-no... I was..c-curious because...I o-overheard lady D-Duranne talking about h-how...you f-fought eighteen on y-your own.”   

“Eight.” Riftan quickly corrected. He wasn’t that surprised the number had risen to eighteen, he figured Ruth had made sure it was retold with some outrageous numbers. Instead, he was surprised that she had even heard the story in the first place. Ruth had only spread that story around in order for them to gain more employment.  

“Wh-what?”   

“It was only eight.”   

She blinked a few times before her eyes grew wide with shock. It made him feel a little uncomfortable.  

“What?”  

“I... I k-knew it...m-must be e-exaggerated...b-but eight?” Slowly, Maximilian turned to better face Riftan. “I-is it...true th-they are twelve m-meters t-tall?” (40ft)   

That uncomfortable feeling started to grow as Riftan felt self-conscious again, running a hand over his hair while looking away before shrugging. “It varies, but that’s their average height.”   

“H-how...old were y-you?”   

He wasn’t quite sure why that mattered but after thinking back for a moment he answered.  

“Sixteen?”   

Maximilian quickly shifted to sit even closer to him, her knees now touching the side of his leg. It almost distracted him from her outburst.  

“Y-you s-survived against eight at s-s-sixteen?!”   

Riftan felt his stomach start to twist. He wanted to tell her it was possibly different from what she was picturing but when he looked over at her he she look awestruck. Most heard this story and saw him as a type of monster, a profitable one, but a monster, nonetheless. Yet, here she was, looking up at her ‘Knight in shining armor’ as if he had just performed some grand act just for her.  

Slowly, he nodded, not trusting his voice at the moment.   

At his silent answer, the lady settled herself back a little all while still looking up at him.  

“Y-you’re...amazing.” The affirmation was said in a soft whisper, but they struck his heart in a way he wasn’t used to.  

“It wasn’t just by myself. I had help from a mage.”   

“C-could you t-tell me more? Wh-what was...the m-mage's n-name?” As if she suddenly realized she was a lady, all manners seemed to come flooding back. Maximilian gently moved to sit in a more dignified way before calmly adding a soft. “P-please?”  

Riftan hated the small bit of jealousy he had towards her excitement for Ruth, but he swallowed it down. He had no right to be jealous of anyone. Riftan knew she would never be his, to just be grateful for the friendship developing between them. This was more than he could ever ask for. He had dreamed of getting this close to Maximilian, of hearing her voice and having her smile up at him. However, now that it was happening, he wasn’t sure how to handle it. The emotions she was bringing out were so intense, sometimes even unpleasant. Still, he knew he didn’t want this to end.  

Clearing his throat, Riftan began to tell her the story of when he was a mercenary and was convinced to take on a job from some insufferable nobleman. Riftan paused for a moment, waiting for her reaction to finding out he was once a common sell sword, but she didn’t seem phased by it, so he continued. Normally he didn’t like talking about past fights, for better or worse that was Ruth's job, but Maximilian seemed so hooked on every word that he couldn’t help but find some enjoyment from it. He didn’t  tell it in some grand way like Gabel would, just blunt facts of the battle and his frustration with the failed magic. He did leave out a few details, not sure if telling the lady how he threw a hook into the wyvern's eye would be a good idea. The lack of gore or flair didn't seem to make her enjoy the story any less. Whenever he mentioned magic, her eyes lit up and when he was describing the spell Ruth had used to catch him, she had moved closer to Riftan again, no longer sitting next to him but now face to face.   

Just as he got to the point of what happened with the payment with the nobleman the bells rang out causing both to let out a disappointed sigh. 

“W-will...would y-you be so k-kind to tell...m-me more s-stories? It f-feels as if...y-you’ve l-lived such a... a r-rich l-life.” It was an innocent question, but all Riftan could think about was the less than pleasant moments in his life. That close call with that drake, the pathetic moments of him using her during those illusions, the blatant hatred he experienced in Balto or even when his room was frequently broken into by some naked woman failing to force herself on him. Riftan resisted a shiver at those memories. He’d have to really think it over on what to tell her next time. 

Taking her hand in his, Riftan gently helped the lady stand on her feet before slowly kissing it. The warmth of her hand and the soft blush she gave him was already melting away the unpleasant memories that surfaced. It was also making it all too tempting to tease her again. 

“I would be honored to tell you more, my lady.” She smiled brightly at that but faltered a little as Riftan brought her hand back to his lips. “But only if you tell me about those books you’ve been reading.” Riftan had kept the back of her hand against his lips as he spoke in a lowered voice. It had a pleasant effect of making the lady blush brightly yet again. It was to the point where her ears and neck looked as if she had been burned by the sun. 

“Th-th-that w-would be in-in-appropriate!” 

Letting her hand slip from his, Riftan cocked his head to the side and smiled down at her. “So, you have read them.”  

He could only imagine how hot her face must have felt at that moment. Maximilian was unable to say a single word to him as she puffed out her cheeks in defiance before quickly spinning around and running back towards the castle with the cat chasing after her. 

All Riftan could do at that moment was laugh.

[tanoraqui]

The last sons of Fëanor and their forces came to Sirion with blood-hungry blades and the acrid burn of Free Magic, and the ringing of deathly bells. Not a single charter mark was left uncorrupted in that fallen house. Worst of all, they came with a monster of white fire, which leapt ahead of their army with predatory glee.

The Abhorsen was not there to guard his city. He had sailed up the coast seeking aid, seeking refugees, seeking anyone who might be left in the darkening land beyond the wall, which darkened a little more each day as Orannis's strength grew. (Soon, the Ninth Bright Shiner's full power would return, and nothing left in the world would be able to stop him from destroying all that he hated, which was everything.)

He'd left his sword with his wife, the Charter marks still shining bright under the ever-clouded sky. She was the heir of Ranna-that-remained (though that queen remained no more) - so bells might have served her well, but even the Abhorsen's blessed blade didn't suit the power of the gentle Sleeper. She leapt with it into the sea, rather than let the fallen princes steal the heirloom at last.

The entity of white flame picked idly through the ashes and refuse of the refugee city. It was vaguely humanoid, though its limbs twisted and stretched at its whim. It batted a fallen tower-stone around like a cat with a toy. It did the same with a few corpses, but stopped more quickly, and set them to the side.

In a one-room house, it found a woman still alive, leaning heavily on a doused stove with one hand pressed to her bleeding side. It spoke to her in a voice that snapped and cracked like lightning as well as flame: "Go swiftly, child. You won't like what's coming if you stay."

Though clumsy with blood loss, she raised her dagger and tried to stab it. The entity's laugh crackled as it caught her arm. Still laughing. It broke first her wrist, then her shoulder, then, as she gasped in pain, her neck.

"Remember what I said!" it called as she faded helplessly into Death.

A muffled squeak of horror came from a large travel chest shoved against the opposite wall. The entity cocked its head curiously, then prowled across the room with all the confidence of a predator which knew its prey was cornered.

It yanked the chest apart entirely, tearing it in half between two burning white arms and crumbling the pieces. Two boys spilled out, identically dark-haired and fine-featured, about six years old. Only one was awake; the other was limp and bleeding from the temple, a stray blow in the madness of battle. Yet conscious and unconscious alike they clung to one another, and the wakeful child glared up at the monster with all the savage fury of a terrified child.

The being of Free fire recoiled.

"No," it hissed. "No! They had time to breed?"

It was about to sink blazing, dagger-sharp spines into both children where Sareneth rang deep and demanding from outside the little house, and a hoarse but strong voice only a little less accustomed to command called, "Mogget! Stop playing with your food and come face us!"

The entity stopped, attention briefly yanked toward the door. Then with a shiver of light it broke free and reached again for the children with merciless intent.

The bell sang out again, this time joined by Kibeth, and two voices called it out. The entity, which was still known as Mogget, was again caught for a moment - but an even shorter moment this time.

But still it stopped, and cocked its head toward the door.

"Only two, now," it murmured to itself. "Yes..." It smiled, which was a terrible thing to behold on a thing with no real face. "Two, I think I shall manage quite well."

With an almost gentle touch, save for the acrid burn of raw Free Magic, it swooped down and scooped the boys up in its arms, and deposited them unharmed on the very ragged mattress beside the shards of the chest. The wakeful one hugged his brother even tighter, trying to shield him.

The Mogget chuckled, and patted him on the heard.

"Wait here, little pests," it purred - a snapping, crackling purr, but a purr unmistakably. "I'll have you for dessert."

Then it darted out a shattered window.

Shouts greeted it immediately, and more ringing of bells - necromancer's bells, which had never known a Charter mark. Light flashed and cracked like a rainless storm, a rich voice rose to accompany the bells in song, and fire sizzled against cold steel. On the ragged mattress, the wakeful boy first looked around for somewhere else he could drag his brother to hide - for he had no desire whatsoever to be 'desert.' But when Astariel herself joined the chorus of battle, he just just clapped his hands over his ears and buried his face in his brother's blood-stained hair with a sob, and through muffled tears begged him to wake up.

However soft, his cries were loud in the echoing silence that followed the Weeper's ring. The second boy stirred, tears staining his cheeks, too, and murmured, "'lrond?"

The wakeful twin's weeping redoubled. Before he could reply, however, both froze at a terrible shriek from the street outside. The soul-piercing scream came closer without moving and they clutched each other tight. Then it faded into a cate's enraged yowl, merely ear-piercing.

Elrond leapt to his feet, and resumed looking around frantically.

"'Ros, he have to hide," he whispered. "We have to - "

Elros caught sight of their nursemaid on the floor, unmoving with her bloody side and twisted neck. He shoved his fist in his mouth to muffle a cry, and let his brother drag him into the corner beside the potbelly stove - the closest thing to a hiding spot, with escape blocked by voices approaching the single door.

A giant pushed it open, or close enough to a giant - a seven-foot-tall man in heavy armor with vividly copper hair tied back for battle. His armor was singed blood-splattered and his skin pale from the iciness of Death. But he moved unflinchingly and his single mailed hand held a long sword that sparked with red lightning and reeked of Free Magic.

A monster, at any rate - these children knew what Maedhros, Fëanor's eldest son, was said to look like. He was one of their mother's nightmares.

Another followed him - another son, another nightmare. The Dark Singer, Maglor the necromancer, bells all slung across his chest save for the sixth, which he held ready to ring. Ice was still melting off his armor.

At Maglor's heels came a small white cat in a red collar, complaining, " - waste your time, when reinforcements could arrive from Balar in - "

He saw the boys crouching by the cold stove and cursed in a language older than anyone else present could comprehend. It sounded a great deal like hissing.

Maedhros raised one cynical eyebrow. He continued stalking forward with a foreboding frown.

Elrond flinched back. It was Elros's turn to scowl fiercely up at the enemy.

"Nelyo, don't scare them." Maglor elbowed Maedhros aside and crouched in front of the twins. He sheathed Saraneth and displayed his empty hands with a gentle smile.

"Hey there," he said. His was the rich, warm voice. "We're not going to hurt you. Don't mind my brother, he's just grumpy. He's had a rough day. I bet you have too, hmm?"

There was blood on his teeth and lulling power in his hum. On raw instinct, Elros shrieked in jarring disharmony.

Quick as a flash, Maglor drew tinkling Ranna and sang Saraneth in harmony. Already exhausted from grief and fear, both children collapsed bonelessly.

"'Don't scare them,'" Maedhros quoted dryly as the echoes faded. His was the hoarse voice, rough from ancient scars.

"Shut up," Maglor said irritably. Bell still held high, he leaned forward and fished the scowlier child out of the tangle of immature limbs. He ran his fingers carefully along the boy's bloody scalp and pronounced, "Just a cut."

He turned the boy's face toward the dim light from the broken window. "Those are Turgon's eyebrows, right? And his nose, a little?" He added conscientiously, "Also, the silver keys on their tunics."

"Mogget," said Maedhros, looking back - but the cat had disappeared. His jaw tightened.

"He'll be back," said Maglor. "It's us or Eärendil - especially if we have the Abhorsen-in-waiting."

He gathered one twin over each shoulder and stood with a grunt. Their bodies lay limp but warm against his armor. The last bits of ice had melted.

"Much use, any of them," Maedhros said bitterly. "With no bells, no book, not even the bloody sword..."

Already across town from their recurring arguments, the small white cat stalked an engagingly plump rat through some battle-torn turf...and lost it when the bell on his collar suddenly chimed in a strong gust of wind. He sat back and began to wash himself in the universal sign of a cat who meant to do that, no really.

Damn bells! Damn bindings! Damn infant Abhorsens! He couldn't wait for Orannis to finish waking completely and tear them all to shreds!

Though, he could admit, the ninth note on the scale, far beyond petty mortal perception, which permeated matter and mind alike with ever-increasing intensity and goaded destruction as Ranna whispered sleep or Saraneth demanded obedience...and kept the sky so damn cloudy all the time; he hadn't had a really good sunbeam in years... He didn't like that, either. It set his fur on end, even on the pleasant occasions when he wasn't confined to fur.

Old Kingdom au!Fëanor wants to he Abhorsen like his father before him so bad that it makes him look stupid. He wants to be Abhorsen like his father before him so bad that he makes an entirely new set of Charter-infused necromantic bells just to prove that he can wield such powerful, important, approximately sacred tools. He manages this because he is, of course, a Wallmaker, not an Abhorsen. They do become the Abhorsen’s main set henceforth, after the originals are destroyed when Fingolfin tries to 1v1 Orannis.

Hm, actually, the relationship between divinities and people is all but inverted between these two media. I need to think about this some more.

[sarcastic-sketches]

Kitsune!Anakin AU

-Shoves fist in mouth- I'm being so normal about this AU so have some more thoughts on this because free real estate:

When the fuck is this set. Or better yet, when does it start? I wanna say early war just so this transformation can be as inconvenient as possible for Anakin. WAIT NO, It happens while he's still a Padawan, right before he’s supposed to be put on guard duty for Padme. It almost has him taken off (Anakin nearly pitches a fit) but the truth is they don't have another Master/Padawan pair to put on it and Padme knows them so she's more likely to be accepting of it.

YES because this would change AotC in subtle ways (and give ME the opportunity to take a baseball bat to certain timeline events). It would also mean that the first time the clones meet Anakin, he's already foxed up and they just ... accept that shit at face value. They don’t know he didn’t used to have ears and tails. He grows his hair out in an attempt to hide his ears among the floof. It doesn’t work. Trying to curate this image of a badass General during the war is a little hampered by the ears he has no control over whatsoever.

I could have tied this to the Feral!Anakin AU but that's more to do with the amnesia and the fucky nature that is half of him being the Force itself. I can do more in that AU re: partial transformations/adaptability morphing. I am, however, going to mix in a lot of the stuff I had planned in the Intervention AU here because the fox characteristics would be a huge neon sign to his inner problems and how he is not working on any of them.

And we’re still going so under a read more it is.

It starts, as all good AUs do, with Force Temple interference. It feels Anakin walk in and goes, 'no, that human form is not becoming of you' and gives him an overhaul. Anakin is less than impressed because he now has to deal with two very fluffy tails that were not there before (he starts with two instead of one because bullshit power levels). Obi-Wan gives it his patented and classic consideration of ‘oh dear’ which only winds up his padawan further and poof full fox form. And it’s tiny.

The only reason Obi-Wan is not laughing out loud is because he has the control and patience of a fucking mountain. But he is literally just this on the inside:

This is what you deserve, Anakin. This is what you get for being a little shit. A trickster fox spirit suits you perfectly. Obi-Wan can pick up his Padawan like a handbag and Anakin is even less enthused about this. He doesn’t complain as much if he gets to snag a ride in the hood of Obi-Wan's cloak though.

To start with, the full fox form is smol, like a cat, but he gets bigger as he develops more tails. He can go back to being toy sized if he wants though through shapeshifter abilities. Ahsoka fucking LOVES being able to just cart her Master around it’s so funny, he can fit right between her montrals like a hat. He puts up with it because it makes her happy but he’s glaring at everyone over her head if they dare say a word. If Rex finds his fun-sized General taking a nap in his helmet, no he didn’t.

Christ how could I forget the screaming. The dramatic little bitch that he is just going off like a tea kettle at the slightest inconvenience. You want to annoy the enemy really fast? Fives wants to do a yell-off? Some asshole won’t shut up disrespecting the clones? Anakin just transforms, opens his jaws and screams. It’s just as unearthly as a regular fox screaming too.

More technical info:

Partial fox form keeps the tails (very fluffy, convenient cushions) but also ears, claws, and sharp teeth. His mouth gets unnaturally wide when he laughs, like he's shifting into a fox set of jaws.Theoretically, with shapeshifter abilities he should be able to make himself look fully human...should.

He keeps shifting between full fox and humanoid due to emotional instability.

His eyes stay blue, maybe almond pupils, or maybe the whole eye goes blue with intense emotion so you can't see the whites anymore. Fur colour is the same as his hair colour with dark point colouration. Maybe he gets that point markings on his arms and legs too.

Dark Timeline, Vader briefly hits seven tails but gets capped back at five because Obi-Wan cut off his last two that appeared during the fight on Mustafar. He has inverted colours, so dark fur and gold tipped tails (i'm just a whore aesthetically for black with gold highlights tbh). This AU won’t actually see the rise of Vader though because I dust my hands off with canon.

[hualianff]

10 examples of HC’s cat, E’Ming, being a brat:

1. Pushing things off counters such as his keys, hand towels, paperwork, and hair ties - especially when HC is looking directly at her.

2. HC suddenly fighting for his life in the middle of the night because E’Ming decided to plop herself right on HC’s chest, staring at him with owl eyes, daring him to push her off.

HC does. Except this continues to happen numerous times throughout the night. HC gives up and goes back to sleep with shallow breaths.

Then wakes up at 6 AM sharp to E’Ming violently making biscuits on his tiddies, reminding him it’s breakfast time.

3. E’Ming randomly nipping him when he’s just trying to pet her, damn it! But during the times HC is preoccupied, E’Ming yowls like she’s paid to get the neighbors to call animal services on them!

4. Walking all over HC’s keyboard when he’s trying to work. Sitting on the exact papers he’s trying to look at. Chewing on his fancy pens.

5. Being a PICKY eater.

6. Perching menacingly on the bathroom counter while he showers, staring directly through the glass door.

7. Escaping once a month, also known as giving HC a heart attack once a month.

8. Weaving through his long legs to the point HC trips when trying to avoid stepping on her.

9. E’Ming pawing at the bead in HC’s braided hair.

HC: “NO-“

E’Ming: “MREOWWW!” *bites on the braid*

10. E’Ming scaling HC’s back when she wants to be held, ripping the back of his shirts in the process.

***

1 pro that makes the previous 10 things less insufferable:

1. E’Ming is a Gege-attractor.

***

1 con that cancels out the previous pro:

1. E’Ming is a Gege-hogger.

[extra: E’Ming is a blue-baller.]

***

1. E’Ming wiggling her way between gege’s legs while Hualian make out on the couch…

HC: “DAMN IT NOT NOW-“

XL: “hi sweet girl~”

2. E’Ming loafing on XL’s chest as he lays on the couch. HC comes to join but as he leans forward to kiss XL, E’Ming places her paw on his lips-

HC: “the audacity of my fucking cat- MOVE-!”

Before HC can pick E’Ming up, the cat has wrapped her body around XL’s neck, purring up a storm. XL laughs in delight. His hands gently pet E’Ming’s black, soft fur.

XL: “my noble, gracious protector” *kisses E’Ming’s fur*

HC: 🧍‍♂️

3. E’Ming appearing out of nowhere to aggressively bat HC’s head as he’s about to enter XL-

HC: 😑

Thus, Hualian end up closing HC’s bedroom door every time they need alone time. Sometimes, they put on a playlist to block out E’Ming’s tantrum.

After they’re done. XL goes to let E’Ming in. But before she enters, her nose scrunches up.

She sniffs a couple times. Then glares at HC.

And sprints away.

***

Miraculously, XL has a sixth sense in catching any item E’Ming decides to sweep off the counter.

It’s their thing because E’Ming always tries to be unpredictable but somehow XL IS ALWAYS THERE!? HE’S ALWAYS READY??

IS HE STALKING HER???

XL, catching all the mail E’Ming flung off in succession: “aiya, stop! you know it‘s useless. i’ll just keep catching everything you drop.”

E’Ming: [annoyed] “mrreow!!”

XL: “keep dreaming, kitten” :)

E’Ming: [jumps off counter and retreats to HC’s bedroom]

HC, watching from the side, starstruck: “I think I just fell deeper in love with you, Gege.”

***

No matter what HC claims, he still loves and cares for E’Ming immensely. He actually spoils her to bits by buying her the tastiest food packed with nutrition and the most addicting catnip toys that she could play with for hours.

HC is also in the process of installing high ledges on the wall to create an elevated cat jungle for E’Ming to play on. When he mentions this to XL for the first time, XL raises an eyebrow and smiles, amused.

XL: “she has you wrapped around her sassy little tail, doesn’t she?”

HC, in realization: 🫠

***

When Hualian decide to move in together, XL brings his pet snake, Ruoye, to HC’s apartment.

E’Ming’s fur poofs up in defense when she first spots the long, pale creature behind the glass tank. When Ruoye’s tongue flicks out, E’Ming books it out of the living room.

Absolutely terrifying, she concludes.

But as the months pass by, E’Ming comes to accept this foreign thing must stay. It doesn’t stop her from staring at Ruoye for long periods of time, or from trying to intimidate the snake with a front-row-seat to her wrestling a stuffed animal frog WWE-style.

But they manage to get along. Eventually, it will be safe enough that XL can take Ruoye out and hang her on his neck while he completes chores and E’Ming will insistently tag along.

Plus, all the dead mice that E’Ming proudly drops at HC’s feet can contribute towards Ruoye’s food source.

***

XL’s moving in also means a boost in social events HC is a part of. Not that he minds too much because most of the time it’s people both he and XL are familiar with.

If E’Ming can be a total brat to the one who puts a roof over her head and food in her bowl, then she can be satan’s literal spawn to humans in every other category. (Excluding XL, of course.)

Cue HC subjecting his devil cat to certain somebodies during their Chinese New Year dinner.

E’Ming actually doesn’t mind HX. For years, HX looked after her when HC was away, and she quite likes HX’s scent for some reason…fishy.

But HX, in his all black attire, steers clear from the black furball who will bite him if he doesn’t feed her the special treats he usually has and currently doesn’t.

MQ and E’Ming have glaring contests. Every time. E’Ming looks like she’s preparing to attack MQ’s leg? Go on, he seethes with his eyes. I dare you.

E’Ming stalks away with her chin tipped up.

MQ is also the only one who can stop E’Ming from pushing things off the counter with one tongue-click.

However, no matter how hard MQ tries to prevent it, E’Ming always squeezes her way in to watch him go to the bathroom.

FX high-key really wants to pet E’Ming but he doesn’t stand a chance.

MQ to FX: “you know, it doesn’t help that you have dogs”

FX: “s-shut up”

E’Ming walking by…

FX: “hiiii, hellooo sweet thing!”

E’Ming: 👁👁

FX: “…pspspsp-“

E’Ming hisses, then trots away.

Right into YY’s arms.

Because for some reason, E’Ming LOVES YY. She always greets him at the front door with a soft “mrrrp??” and then rub her cheek on his legs until he picks her up.

YY holds her like a baby, rocking slightly. E’Ming immediately begins purring loudly, slowly closing her eyes.

HC: “you know you’re stuck with her for awhile now?”

YY: “yeah” *heads to the chair in the corner*

If you listen closely, you can hear FX sobbing in the background.

***

w/ @no-one-says-hi

《2》

[ohimsummer]

red-handed

jean  + “Think anyone will notice if I start fingering you right now?”

18+ smut ahead, minors dni please

content: jean x fem!reader, semi-public?, oral [f.receiving], finger sucking, jean being an asshole, 

“Hey, Springer, have some self-control during class time.”

The rest of the students in the class snicker and giggle at Connie as he groans aloud and scowls. “Yes, Mr. Ackerman.”

“Be more like Y/N, she never makes any noise during calls. Is class boring you, Connie?,” teases Sasha.

The sentence trails off in your mind, you don’t even hear the end of it. Mr. Ackerman wasn’t directing a question at you, so luckily there’s no need to risk opening your mouth and letting any unwanted noises slip free.

A quiet giggle from your boyfriend reaches your ears. You glower down at him where he’s kneeled between your legs underneath your desk, fingers dancing around your inner thighs. Jean wiggles and thrusts his tongue inside of your dripping core, and then offers you an innocent grin at the sight of you sharply sucking in air.

“Y’know, she’s so right, baby.” You’re not even looking at him anymore, but you can still make out the mocking tone in his taunt. “You’re so good at keeping your composure.” He leaves a wet kiss on your clit and titters when you grasp at his shoulder. “Think anyone will notice if I start fingering you right now?”

You’re about to chastise him when a voice catches your attention. It just had to be your professor at the worst possible moment. You didn’t even hear what he said. "I'm sorry, Mr. Ackerman, could you, er, repeat that?”

The expression on your teacher’s face would have been more than a little amusing if Jean wasn’t prodding the tips of his fingers around your pussy. You discreetly attempt to bat his hand away, but all your efforts accomplish is getting your fingers trapped between Jean’s lips. If the blush on your face wasn’t visible before, you’re sure it’s evident now as his tongue toys with your fingers and he drenches them in his spit.

You’re barely paying attention when Mr. Ackerman is speaking again. “I figure since you have the highest grade in this class, you can explain to Braus and Springer here why we’d die if stars were in front of the moon.”

All you manage to get out is half your answer. “Of course, Mr. Ackerman. Stars are technically smaller suns, which means them being in front of the moon would likely burn us ali-,ah!”

You slap your hand over your mouth. Your eyes dart back to Jean, and you hate him so much right now. You hate the stupid, smug look on his face, you hate how pretty he looks with your fingers down his throat, and you especially hate how deep his fingers are buried in you right now.

“Everything alright, L/N?,” Mr. Ackerman asks with a raised eyebrow.

You turn your attention back to the computer screen and struggle to explain yourself. Jean doesn’t let up the thrusting of his fingers, in fact he speeds up and even curls them to hit that spongy spot inside you every time you try and get words out.  

“I-, uh, yeah, Mr. Ackerman!,” you barely manage to gasp out,” I’m just, ah, babysitting my friend’s cat and h-he brushed, ah, against my leg.”

He gives you a look as if he doesn’t believe a word you just said, but Mr. Ackerman chooses not to push the matter further. “Hm. Okay, then. Guess you’re lucky class is over, seems the little guy wants some attention.”

You stare down at Jean once again. He removes your fingers from his mouth to give your clit a harsh suck. You don’t know if you want to kill him or kiss him first. “Yeah. Yeah, he’s been really begging for my attention, sir.”

[muutosarchive]

☽𖤐☾ @riftrive / @riftvice

midas, unlike chaos, is a master in the art of subtlety.. when it's warranted. able to keep his anger in check when required, & his cards close to his chest. but when his ever trusted agent begins to imply certain things... well he's happy to oblige them. for you see someone in the billionaire's position is more than happy to indulge his own inherent greed, due to his knowledge & understanding that time is limited. as well as perhaps their time on this immortal coil. there is chance at actual demise if his plans do not come to fruition. something he isn't willing to squander, as well as the opportunity to engage in some much needed stress relief. all the more reason to allow the other into a more personal space, to share some alone time with one another.

he is an emotional wall, yet not for the reasons of the other. of course, chaos has more of a mind to be able to show the emotions they feel on a whim, almost as if each new desire was a social experiment in itself. his comfort on the couch is in an unreadable face, & folded legs. one crossed over the other, with one gilded arm upon the designated rest, & the other over the back. a narrowing of his topaz optics as well as a wry sideways smirk when a tendril sneaks over his shoulders. fingers brought up first to toy with their red tie as he leans in, taking note of the other's slowly rippling ooze...

also with a curious amusement. yet, not at the being's expense by any means. "of course..." his reply comes simply enough. "what kind of boss would i be if i denied you what i ask so often." his smirk grows at that. a bit of humoring, he means. not necessarily in this manner. easy enough in the edge of the other's purring, to slip his lithe form to overlap theirs. fluid, with hands on either side of the column of their formed neck. his expression a little deeper set, laxly lidded & sultry as ever. not coy & entirely knowing. smirking, pleasantly.

even as tendril begins to undo his trousers, midas inclines his hips towards the other for their convenience. his eyes to come to shut comfortably, letting himself be in the moment. focusing on his breathing, & the sensation of such living matter gripping, & rippling along his deftly handled shaft. humming at the weight of their three fingered hands upon his hips. even so much as rotating his neck in order to work out some soft cracks. lashes batting upon his mis-matched gaze's return.

he presses his fingers against the other's shoulders. breathing harshly & raggedly through his nostrils. despite his easy demeanor. pliant, & dainty. not so much as he acts when in the field, or even pushing paperwork. a docile house cat... humming softly in agreement while he sheds the scientist of their more human cloth confines. flickering over the body below with smooth confidence, even despite how much it differs from his own.

flickering back up to chaos with a rise of his scarred brow, midas obliges easily. sighing softly at the warmth that surrounds his organ whilst reaching between them & guiding himself inside of the beckoning opening. he inhales harshly with an incline of his chin. eyes lidding even further, whilst a golden hand presses against the chest before him. thumb rolling over the ripples beneath, before providing a nod in approval at the winding appendage sliding along his rear end. pigment licking up his forearms.

it's an odd position, though the angling of their bodies make it easy. midas' lips slipping open, as his knees part slightly. beginning to make a steady pace, while resting his forehead against the one opposite. noting the physical sensations he's experiencing, when hips roll like a dancer in slow undulations. the tight enclosure not something he'd expected, though he enjoys it all the same. finding new leverage with his hand curling around the back of the being's neck.

In - Midas and chaos 😈

❛[   ☣ NSFW PROMPTS ≻ accepting ! NOTES: In - Our muses involved in penetrative sex

`ISOLATION HAD ITS TIMES WHEN DESIRED. Not asocial, but after the day spent surrounded by buzzing mouths and BUSY BODIES, The Agent found themselves hungry for local behind closed doors and hushed halls. (THOUGH, IT WAS NOT A SOLO ONE THEY WERE WISHING FOR). A knot they were becoming more accustomed to had begun to twist within their core, and they had attempted subtlety to let the other know intents blossoming within voidial mind-- - ones that did not require a lab or anything beyond the two of them. (AT THE SAME TIME, SUBTLETY AND CHAOS WERE NOT QUITE SYNONYMS).

`BUT THE DIE HAD BEEN CASTED IN MOTION. The scientist found the couch to be of choice as they sat upon it, merely for proximities sake-- - mask already sans spot upon facade // OOZE A SLOWER RIPPLING THAN NORMAL (SLIGHT CURL OF EDGES WHERE A MOUTH MIGHT BE ON A MORE REALITY COMPLIANT BEING). Tendril peeled its way off of suits backing, daring to wrap around arm of Midas to tempt him closer (PERHAPS A BIT OF NEEDINESS FROM CHAOS, BUT THEY WOULD DENY IF SAID).

` “&– - Care to indulge me a bit?” Voice tuned with a purr to it, adjusting position a bit as other joined them- either side of the creatures legs met with familiar knees. Tendril unwound slowly to change focus, deft in its action of undoing Midas' belt and sliding between rim of pants (HANDS LEFT FREE TO REST ON PARTNERS HIPS). The craft appendage slipping clothing and slithering around member-- - teasing along the hardened length; TESTING, GUAGING (EVEN IN THIS A TOUCH OF THE EXPERIMENTER AND EXAMINER CAME TO LIFE). Hips lifting a tad at the mere contact of gilded hands around their own clothing seams, exposing the inky ooze tainted with the reddish flush of the beings reactionary instincts. Canvas stricken by the brighter crimson display of their INHUMAN organs.

`EVEN THE BRILLIANT COULD BECOME AS BASIC AS BEAST FROM TIME TO TIME. Pelvis shifting to brush slit against Midas' sex, silent request in its form-- - Chaos' own length below their internal organ straying to wander down to brush along the mans backside. Merely a slight SUGGESTION OF IT // BUT NOT QUITE TAKING THAT INTIATIVE THEMSELVES YET (WHILE MORE COMFORTABLE WITH THEIR WANTS, NOT FULLY BOLD YET). Tendril unwound itself from where it had been. Instead occupied by the feeling of the inhuman sensation of ooze being stretched almost like FLESH by insertion, the area of a slightly different composition then the rest of the beings matter-- - unhindered moan leaving the mawless being. Gloved phalanges TIGHTENING EVER SO SLIGHTLY around hips, small tug to bring proximity even closer. A slow INTENTIONAL ride up against the action-- - demanding more without a word needing spoken. // @muutos

[heymrstargazer]

happy 200th hc!! as a thank you im doing the same thing as last time where im taking the most popular one and basically making it into a mini fic. with that being said, i offer the extended version of the beanboozled hc :) 

Neil was completely lost. Sure, he knew he was in the candy aisle of a CVS, but between the various brands and types of everything from chocolate to gummy worms to caramels, he had no fucking clue what he was doing. 

Andrew had groggily sent him out for coffee, candy, and some medicine to help relive the allergies that were kicking his ass. Neil was usually fine with it, knowing where the typical sweets Andrew had asked for were, but this time he had a specific request; jelly beans. Neil had never looked for jelly beans before, much less among the thousands of other brightly colored bags. Finally, after staring pensively for at least two minutes, he spotted it buried around many other oddly-flavored candies. 

The only one that caught his eye, though, was a package with ‘Bean Boozled’ written in bold yellow letters. While pulling off the regular bag, he inspected the package closer. ‘CAUTION! Contains Weird & Wild flavors,’ it read. He tucked the normal bag under his arm.

Andrew had specifically requested the variety pack of Jelly Belly. This seemed to have the same branding, so really Neil was just following instructions, right?

He read through the flavors, interest piqued as they seemed to get worse and worse from stinky socks to canned dog food to skunk spray. It would be a crime not to test them, right?

The cashier was completely uninterested as he tossed everything onto the counter, too busy plotting to notice if they said anything, anyway.

By the time he got home, he had his plan ready. He pulled into the parking garage, checking carefully that Andrew wasn’t smoking by the railing awaiting his return. The coast clear, Neil opened the package and dumped a considerable amount into his hand. He dumped them into the bag of normal ones, holding it closed tightly and shaking it until they were all mixed together. If Andrew asked why it was open, he would just tell him he tried one, simple as that. 

Neil knew things were plenty okay enough for him to pull a stunt like this. Yes, Andrew would probably kick his ass, and yes he’d get more “I hate you”s than normal, but a small break of trust like this was insubstantial. 

The cats greeted him with disinterest after realizing he had not brought them any new toys or treats. Andrew only seemed interested because of the candy and plastic bag hanging over his shoulder. He took it as a win anyway, greeting him with a small kiss and handing over the bags. Andrew took them without question.

“I’m gonna take a quick shower,” he said before pressing a kiss to Andrew’s temple. He got a nod in response and swiftly headed down the hall and to the bathroom. Was he hiding? Maybe, but it was for his own safety.

Thinking about it, Neil had never seen Andrew disgusted by any foods. Other things, sure, but he always carefully chose what he liked and was picky when it came to new things. 

Neil was just helping him out of his comfort zone. 

It felt like a sound argument until Andrew came charging into the bedroom minutes after Neil was done with his shower. He had only managed to pull on a pair of joggers before standing face to face with Andrew across the bed.

“What did you do?” he asked, but it didn’t feel like a question. Neil bit down a grin, seeing the fire behind Andrew’s eyes as Neil’s wry expression seemed only to aggravate him more. “Come here.”

“Why?” he questioned instead of refusing off the bat. 

“Because,” Andrew answered, standing a little straighter to seemingly calm down. 

Neil gave him a mockingly quizzical look. “Because why?”

Andrew’s tolerance broke in record time. “Because if I have to taste moldy fucking cheese, you do too, asshole”

Neil’s grin only grew as Andrew circled the bed, lunging for his wrist but missing as Neil vaulted over the bed and took off for the living room. 

Neil stupidly backed himself into the kitchen, cornered in record time as Andrew threateningly held a handful of jelly beans between them. King came up behind him on the counter, checking to make sure the commotion wasn’t worthwhile before continuing with whatever it was she was doing. Neil snatched her off the counter, using her to shield himself from Andrew.

“Coward,” Andrew said, rolling his eyes and stepping away. It felt like too easy of a win.

He was proven right as he opened his mouth to defend himself, instead receiving a handful of jelly beans that he couldn’t block because of King sitting in his arms. Of course he would screw himself over like that. 

Andrew picked King up and sent her off with a scratch behind the ears, watching smugly as Neil worked his way through the twenty jelly beans in his mouth. Things were fine, an odd mix of fruity flavors, until he chewed one with the unmistakable flavor of vomit. He hurried to spit them out in the trash can, all with Andrew watching in amusement from where he was leaning against the counter. 

“That was horrible,” Neil said, quickly getting a glass of the first thing in the fridge. 

“Really? I wouldn’t have guessed.” Neil shook his head at the familiar deadpan, stepping slightly closer after downing the cup of chocolate milk.

He set it on the counter next to Andrew, looking at him ruefully. “I offer my sincerest apologies for putting you through such a traumatic experience.” He emphasized dramatically, setting his hands on Andrew’s waist. Andrew hummed in a way that said he accepted it, pulling him closer but suddenly stopping a mere inch away.

His hand firmly against Neil’s chest to keep him there, Andrew said, “Go brush your teeth first.”

Neil grinned with a small huff of amusement, dragging Andrew along with to do the same. Needless to say that bag of jelly beans was spoiled so he’d have to go get more later, but at least Andrew would go with him (to make sure he didn’t pull the same shit again).

[sugar-petals]

can you give us more thoughts about domestic yoongles? the taemin's one (wich I love) just made me miss the cat boy so much ;o;

i have a phd in househusband yoongi so let me fire out some ideas for ya.

myg at home headcanon

🐱 word count. 1.9k | fluff, slice of life, slight nsfw mentions, x reader, bullet points

The doorbell sound is a recording of Yoongi imitating a doorbell. He’s such a meme. Ceci n'est pas une pipe.

Seemingly, he teaches himself a new recipe every week. To perfection. Yoongi is very particular about sticking to the recipe and wielding his kitchen tools in the right way. He collects knives, olive oil, and still hates cutting onions.

He separates sleep time, work time, and couple time as the holy trinity. For each, he switches his mood.

Blushes easily no matter for how long you’ve been together.

Establishes his own radio show where he DJs at one point.

Yoongi keeps an extreme track on the garbage schedule. He knows exactly what is due when. Separating the trash is a must. That includes sorting out fake friends trying to get between your relationship. Your social circle as a couple is extremely deliberate.

Yoongi deems himself a terrible host for guests. Unless Hoseok is there to drag him out, it's true he rather stays in the kitchen or at the barbecue preparing the menu courses rather than making small talk. He leaves the hospitality bits to you, however you want to go about it.

What he lacks in conversing with guests, he makes up in bed, God is absolutely fair.

He sings and hums pretty often and has his own vernacular of extraterrestrial uwu noises. It's an alphabet that you have to yet decipher but it's incredibly cute.

Self-made paintings everywhere around his house. 

Yoongi hasn't gone clubbing since grammar school. The most he does is going to a restaurant at lunch with very close friends. And always in a work context. His private life is so secluded from everything else and paparazzi just don't spot him anywhere, Dispatch thinks he must live abroad.

Very well, he does consider his big ole house a separate country. It's a living organism with a studio, gym, trophy room, small-size basketball court, and vastly equipped kitchen. A home theater as well, he likes American movies (like Inception) and Korean action genres, and you can stream whatever you fancy in there whenever you like. 

Yes, he has underwear with cute little bears on.

There's even a little pond in the backyard. Yoongi, Pisces he is, likes fishes after all. Sometimes he sits at the edge of the 'Little Ole Min Lake (LOML)' and stares into the water for literal hours with his chin parked on his palm.

His fridge is so high-tech and futuristic, even Yoongi is rendered clueless by its AI sometimes. The washing machine, too.

Yoongi watches RuPaul’s drag race. What did you expect? He finds it so humorous.

Owns lord knows how many comic collections.

Favorite holiday destination: New York.

Christmas is basically 50% you unveiling new music equipment to him in the garage and Yoongi almost fainting at the sexiness of it. The other 50% is spent holding hands and orgasm after orgasm until the new year since you loose track of time.

Goes on long rants why he’d marry you again every weekend.

Making you presents is his specialty. Always accompanied with a hand-written note. He writes a lot of things by hand for you in general. Texting, basically never. Always on paper.

No sex without a blanket and socks on. Yoongi gets cold very very easily and just doesn’t like showing skin. You buy him a heated blanket for his birthday, he even uses it in his studio chair.

Chronically addicted to making out.

Matching black outfits and glasses.

Laughs at even your worst jokes or phrases you didn’t expect you even uttered.

Yoongi owns the phoniest, most secretive-looking black car ever and nobody knows about it. Even he forgets he owns it, in fact he genuinely acts like it just doesn’t exist. Hilarious. And that guy has a level 1 Korean driver's license. Which allows him to drive trailers and busses and fucking trucks, and construction machines, let that sink in.

It's really a genius curse. Yoongi being put to the test will always deliver but he won't choose to execute his full skillset if he doesn't have to. Well, pragmatic. He's not as phony as he thinks he is, which is even more hilarious.

He uses that behemoth of a car so scarcely because he'd rather have things delivered to his doorstep and he's stingy with gas. Also, he doesn't like traffic and driving because of the traumatic shoulder accident and his tendency to space out. Translation: You drive that thing... that monster... it really is an impressive, fast, and scary machine. 

If someone devious ever even remotely manages to invade his privacy and get past the doubly-installed security system, he has enough money to deal with it no matter what.

If it concerns your privacy, he's a red belt. And owns Jin's number if a taekwondo master is required. Jimin's if it needs someone with kendo skills.

If Yoongi needs someone to go on a complete rampage, Jungkook lives just down the block. He can sprint to Yoongi's bunker I mean mansion within 45 seconds. 30 if it's very urgent. 20 if the reward is an instant ramen splurge with Yoongi's black card.

He has a sexy, glamorous sword collection hanging on the living room wall anyways, so. Who the hell is dumb enough to mess with him and his expensive lawyer in the first place.

But just in case, who knows... Yoongi settles matters shruggingly, anonymously, and with cash and he's too exhausted for violence, but don't underestimate his deter-min-ation and network for emergencies. Also, he is Agust D after all.

He will bonk a naughty burglar or kidnapper across the head with a wooden cooking spoon or take him down by throwing a basketball if the situation requires it. Damn, his reflexes are so fast, a feral cat in motion. So, lean back and sip on your drink of choice. Things are cared for.

If Yoongi is the one being kidnapped or a highly skilled stalker invades the property at night when he's fast asleep (nothing can wake this man during certain hours, strong REM right here): Don't forget that honeyboy is a Dodgers fan. There are signed baseball bats everywhere in this damn house.

In that sense, your parents visiting you here for the first time thought you were an undercover thug couple. Not to worry mom and dad, you both just like sports very much okay.

Yoongi walks around in all black clothes and the rooms are all seemingly dark. Even if you live together, you don't know his skin care routine. It's clear to you he's some sort of vampire.

Since Yoongi always forgets to remove his makeup, you made it a habit to wipe it down when he's about to pass out. He won't lie, he enjoys that kind of affection.

Holly is your resident child. You're essentially a family.

He insists to tackle this by himself, Yoongi sees his therapist monthly. Not shifting responsibility is something he's stubborn about and he pours his emotions into writing. You will do conversation about deeper stuff, but he says it's mostly up to him and his own mind. He dislikes burdening you or opening up too much and it's something to respect rather than force him about. If he wants to share a thought, he will. It doesn’t mean he can’t trust you or sucks at communicating (we know that he’s direct). Yoongi simply can’t put that much pain in such few words nor should you alleviate it for him.

Calls from the manager faze Yoongi as much as Jimin is bothered by gravity. If he’s busy kissing your body slow mo, who the hell dares to disturb his worship. 

This man had so many let-downs and interpersonal catastrophes in his life, he's super discerning with people. Because he rolls that way, during their first meeting Yoongi uses his psychology certificate on your friends. You see him squint at them, he listens very closely. After they pass the vibe check aka meow radar, he befriends them, too.

Yoongi doodles Grammy trophies everywhere to manifest them.

Yoongi shaves his legs.

All the sex toys he’s ever bought are black. Gotta vibe in style.

He spends ridiculous amounts of time in the studio but he's yours for the remainder of the night, breakfast, and he makes a lavish lunch and dinner.

Um, consider his head parked between your legs. The Hongkong line was not a joke.

Doesn’t mind you squishing his cheeks whenever and for how long you like. 

Every other weekend he gets flowers, vouchers, and gifts — not because of fans, they don’t know where his house is, but because he donates so much.

Namjoon often drops by and cleanses the area with his crystals.

Yoongi is a photography major so you can ask him to take professional, ceiling-high black and white shots of you.

Feeding each other food lovingly. Man, this guy got lips.

He set up a library just for you, in the exact historical aesthetic you like the most. Send him the link to any book you want, it's basically in the online shopping cart already. As I said, he wants to make you presents like every week.

Sometimes he sits on the other end studying English videos and vocab while you read. And yes, he's already 95% fluent but pretends being merely intermediate. He knows technical terms even native speakers have never heard of.

He collects pajamas and earrings.

Swears on the phone.

Namjoon being the horniest member is a cover-up story. Yoongi masturbates almost unreasonable amounts of times, by himself and in your arms when going to bed. Not gonna lie, it’s a sight to see his hands at work. He’s almost equally obsessed with fingering you once you ask him.

Yoongi was the one asking you to move in and almost had a nervous meltdown before meeting up with you to tell you just that. 

He’s the little spoon and of course a sleeping burrito to hold tight.

Finds you equally attractive in any state or styling. Yoongi practices what he preaches, he always reacts the same and says the same. 

Jams out to outrageous beats Namjoon sends him by dancing in the studio. You walk in on him every time. Was embarrassed at first, now you dance along.

Has bought you a life-sized Yoongi pillow and customized you a giant Shooky to hug when he’s not at home over night.

Owned a wine cellar until he quit drinking. Turned it into a piano room instead.

Only you know Yoongi has a serpent and dagger tattoo.

Scrubs the bathroom religiously.

The house smells like restaurant food and his extravagant perfumes half of the time.

Sometimes he has to remind himself he’s married to you and not his coffee machine. He shall be forgiven. You can’t complain that he doesn’t love you enough, nor is he ever not adorable when drinking his latte.

Never wears short sleeves. It can be scorching and he’ll wear a jacket. 

Tell him and the cap stays on during sex.

He grows his hair out and puts it in a low bun. The bangs remain.

Yoongi has installed the most fire-proof building in the entire city it seems. That he wanted to be a firefighter when he was young definitely shows. Figures the house has to be protected from heat: His blasting studio music and Yoongi himself are just way too sizzling.

Still melts into a puddle when you kiss his nose.

Couple sunrise watching. 

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