#he's just a weird case.

[stadam]

i've mentioned this vaguely but... adam IS sworn to virtue and chastity, as an angelic knight, as his duty is devoted to serving heaven and he's not supposed to indulge in any temptations of the flesh. obviously, he doesn't adhere to this strictly. but he does, inwardly, feel somewhat guilty about it. he does consider it a sin / or at the very least, breaking his vow. so, he's generally not very open about any such affairs, nor does he actually sleep around often. ( especially while in heaven! if he indulges, it's usually down in hell. )

[trekkerac]

it does not matter who you are! stanley will lie to your face! and trick you into following some rando who's not even dead or gonna die for miles out of town!

👻💀All Frankenghost drawings💀👻

[sunderwight]

Shen Qingqiu gets hit by a rare wife plot.

And it actually is a rare one because Airplane didn't even write this one down! He toyed with the idea before ultimately dismissing it as being too controversial for the tastes of his readers, and adapting only a few of the same elements for a subsequent chapter of PIDW.

But apparently the System can pull inspiration even from the author's thoughts, especially when there's nothing to contradict the concept and even a few threads of it still to be found in the original, and somehow Shen Qingqiu runs afoul of this previously-unwritten plot bunny.

The core concept was a cuck scenario, of all things. One of the Luo Binghe's wives gets afflicted by a poison that can only be cured by dual cultivation, but specifically can't be cured by by dual cultivation with anyone who has mastery over demonic qi. Something something conflicting energies, something bullshit something. Peerless Cucumber would have ripped the chapter to shreds if it had actually made it to publication, not just for the insult of implying that Luo Binghe should let one of his wives sleep with someone else, but also because why would Luo Binghe -- able to use both kinds of cultivation -- somehow not be able to keep his demonic energies from influencing the situation just in this one case?

Well it turns out that in his specific case it's because sex gets him too worked up to keep things strictly separate, and the degree of control required to treat the affliction whilst dual cultivating is extensive enough that even a little slip-up would be fatal.

Of course, in the actual chapter of PIDW, this same plot device was altered and used to create a harem orgy where Luo Binghe oversaw several of his wives "treating" one another's "afflictions", but Shen Qingqiu just had to go and get a fatal of dose of the more severe version (he didn't realize the risk, because again, this version didn't even make it into the novel).

Anyway, of course this ends up with Shen Qingqiu trying to figure out another way to cheat death, while Luo Binghe goes through the five stages of grief before accepting that he's just going to have to let someone else fuck his husband. This leads to an argument because of course Shen Qingqiu's not going to cheat on Luo Binghe, and he's especially not going to force one of his martial siblings to sleep with him, come on now, and Luo Binghe trying not to cry tears of blood while bringing himself to explain that a fair few of Shen Qingqiu's sect siblings would be happy volunteers for this task.

Shen Qingqiu's just like, well of course you think that, for some bizarre reason you think everyone wants to sleep with me. Bias is what it is. Really it's flattering Binghe but obviously every other person we know is straight, that's just statistics, and everyone in the entire cultivation world knows that Qi Qingqi would sooner chew glass than have sex with a man!

Luo Binghe, weeping now: Shizun please. This is serious. I need you speak words that make sense in the order you're saying them.

They argue, they reach an impasse, the clock is ticking. So Luo Binghe reluctantly turns to the most reliable source of information (outside of himself) on Manipulating Shen Qingqiu to Do Things That Are in His Own Best Interests -- Shang Qinghua.

At first Shang Qinghua is like, well I'm flattered Junshang but I don't think I could shoulder the baggage of fucking Cucumber-bro for you. But then Luo Binghe is like no I need someone who is way hotter and more capable than you, if Shizun is going to fuck someone else at my behest they're going to be TOP TIER so that when I fuck him better afterwards he's really impressed with me. Liu Qingge, obviously.

Not Yue Qingyuan, Shang Qinghua asks? (He'd take the insult a little more personally but honestly he's just relieved that he's not being asked to navigate this social minefield.)

No, Luo Binghe says. He's not 100% sure he could beat Yue Qingyuan in a fight even to this day, which in his mind also translates to not being 100% sure he could do sex better than him either, so Yue Qingyuan is an emergency last resort. He's way more likely to cry on Shizun too and Shen Qingqiu is into that shit, it's too risky.

Alright, says Shang Qinghua, and he thinks about it, and then he comes up with the beautifully simple solution:

Luo Binghe has to fuck Liu Qingge first.

Because of course the crux of the issue is that even with permission, Shen Qingqiu doesn't want to cheat on Luo Binghe. But in the twisted annals of his mind, Luo Binghe himself is still entitled to a harem, even if Luo Binghe is also happily monogamous in this life. So if he shacks up with Liu Qingge first then Liu Qingge essentially joins Luo Binghe's harem, at which point if Shen Qingqiu sleeps with him it's not an affair, it's the gay version of those fanservice-y 3P scenes that the wives in PIDW did. Shang Qinghua translates the concept as best as he can to Luo Binghe, who -- though slightly dubious -- must accept that so far Shang Qinghua's wisdom hasn't steered him wrong with regards to his shizun's eccentricities.

Luo Binghe's mission: seduce Liu Qingge, or at least convince him to have sex, or possibly to lie and (convincingly!) tell Shen Qingqiu that they had sex. That last one is the longest shot so he's probably going to have to just fuck him (Luo Binghe still underestimates how willing his husband is to believe that just about anyone would have sex with him).

Shang Qinghua's mission: convince Shen Qingqiu that he owes his husband steamy threeway gay sex or something so that this plan he pulled out of his ass doesn't backfire and get him killed.

[glow-worms-are-believers]

Witness Protection

There’s a dead guy in the alley and it’s not Danny. 

Ok, technically there are two dead guys in the alley but honestly, Danny feels like they’re way past semantics.

Because, once again, there is a dead man in the alley. 

Danny is fairly sure the guy’s been murdered. The bloody mess that is the guy's chest is a pretty good indicator, but the bloody knife that's still stuck in the guy’s guts is really what makes it for the teen.

Danny might be freaking out a little bit. Because, while he is used to dead people, they’re never this newly deceased, or for that matter, this gruesomely murdered.

Before his breath can quicken too much, Danny makes himself take a deep breath. 

Say what you want about Danny, but he hasn’t spent his high-school career moonlighting as a teenage vigilante without learning a thing or two about staving off a panic attack. Feeling more calm, Danny focuses back on the issue at hand.

I should call the police, says something in the back of his head that sounds like Jazz.

If I call in the murder I’ll be on the suspect list, retorts some other part of his brain he’s choosing to call the Sam part.

No advice from an imaginary Tuck though. Even in his own mind he can’t imagine a Tucker that hasn’t already passed out cold at the sight of a dead guy. 

Which, fair. Danny is kinda considering the option, as he’s feeling a little faint himself. It is way past time he got out of here. At least he's figured out just how to do it.

Anonymous tips are a wonderful thing, made all the more wonderful by the presence of payphones in Gotham.Danny is officially handing this off to the proper authorities.

Boy is he glad he doesn’t have to be involved anymore.

A few streets over, a hooded figure rounds a corner, their breath coming fast  as they clench their bloody fists agitadely. There wasn’t supposed to be anyone there, and yet. This is an unexpected setback.

The hooded figure leans back against the alley wall to catch their breath. Nothing to do about it but fix it. And as these things go, this is an easy mistake to fix. The face of the black-haired blue-eyed hurdle floats to the front of their mind. 

It should be child’s play.

[fisherrprince]

Instead of writing a fanfic like a normal person this oneshot turned into two separate, contextless things,

[forgettable-au]

Does Flowey exist in this au?

Yes, he does.

Everything's pretty much the same when it comes to the regular story in this AU. It's just the past, especifically Papyrus' past (wich we don't know much about to begin with) that changes

Actually Flowey is one of the main characters in the story! (the main story of this au is divided between the past before the game and a post-pacifist timeline:D)

He and Papyrus will have a fun dynamic

-some thought I had in tags behind the keep reading

Srry for the spelling mistakes in here but I can't go and fix tags because I would end up erasing everything😭tumblr struggles

[deklo]

my interpretation of adoptive bee :’)

pls don’t repost!

[ilostmygenderalongwithmydignity]

Can’t stop thinking of the concept of Martha and Thomas Wayne getting resurrected pre-Jason Reveal, and he has all this shit planned, he hasn’t done any of his Dramatic Ideas™️ yet, but Jason “theater kid” Todd hears that his grandparents have come back from the dead, and goes “oh fuck, this would be SO fucking funny” and just. Shows up. Acts like whatever brought them back also did it to him. Alfred answers the door and he’s just like “guess it runs in the family :)”

Bruce et al. are thrilled, if a bit confused as to why he’s so Big now, but they figure whatever, it’s fine, Jason’s BACK

Martha and Thomas, though, IMMEDIATELY know something is up. But they Know in a sort of “I’ve been dead before” way so when they question him they do it out of earshot of everyone else, with an excuse about wanting to get to know their grandson. Jason, knowing he won’t be able to fool them (he’s honestly shocked he’s gotten this far with Alfred), fucking folds immediately. Thing is, you cannot tell me those two had no mob connections. Idc what cannon does or does not say. I stand by the firm belief that organized crime is the funniest possible way for the Waynes to get their fortune, and that’s how a lot of my headcannons start.

ANYWAY, Thomas and Martha are, as a result, amusingly supportive of his crime lord career. To them, this is just a family member with a hobby that reflects their younger years.

So you have

• Bruce Wayne, the Batman, fighting crime

• Jason Todd, his son, Red Hood the prolific crime lord

And

• Thomas and Martha Wayne, Bruce’s parents, who went full mafia family and are very supportive of both careers

And then there’s Alfred, who is pretty sure Martha and Thomas aren’t the only undead members of his family “borrowing” firearms, but in all honesty he feels better about Jason having a gun on him considering what happened to him

[butchsaint]

so how would it be weird for mel and langdon to be together .. like is it because he’s married or is it because she’s autistic and you’re infantilizing her …… autistic girls can and should enjoy relationships with drug addict mean loser doctors on the brink of divorce. maybe that’s mel’s type, we’ve only known her for 14 hours. let her live her truth

[titenoute]

Meme redraw OG Rayman prefers to choose kindness whenever he can...

V.2 :

But sometimes, you gotta send a message.

[icantbotherwithusernames]

i want him stoned in the town square

(why does tumblr make the quality so bad, i promise it’s better)

[astralzeraphias]

“he was mentally ill. this monster was a- was a sick fantasy. a product of his dementia.”

“…i saw it too. does that make me disturbed? demented? does… that make me sick too?”

[petricorah]

zuko alone pt 2

lovingly inspired by this [ids in alt]

[sysig]

Recently had a silly Handplates dream where Papyrus was trying to snoop around Gaster and Alphys’ lab, but didn’t know who Alphys was and so was trying to pass it off as his own lab lol (Patreon)

[aroaceleovaldez]

tbh my latest biggest theory for why HoO and onwards is such a dramatic drop in quality and consistency is just. Rick stopped making teaching guides.

Like, the Lightning Thief teacher's guide is SUPER in-depth with even stuff like sources about middle grade child psychology and exact specifications of where he's applying that, explaining what different character's goals/motivations are, their dynamics with each other and their environments, etc etc. Even specifying which specific myths certain plot elements are supposed to reference or be about.

That stuff just doesn't exist for later books. There's activity guides and smaller, significantly more simple teacher guides for later books but they don't go into anywhere NEAR the same level of depth. The TLT one is a full lesson plan that breaks down the book at every level and explains what's going on and more or less why Rick did that. The others are all basically just glossaries of terminology and some simple question guides.

And they didn't even use the TLT teacher's guide for the Disney+ show because they clearly aren't adhering to any of what's discussed in that breakdown of the book.

By creating a teaching guide alongside writing the actual book, that's forcing you to document what you're doing, why, your sources, and information about your characters and the story they're in. It's like an even more in-depth version of a series bible. But that's lacking for later books (and etc) and it shows because that level of thought and depth and attention just isn't there anymore.

[hana-bobo-finch]

i love making low effort shitposts instead of properly explaining my oc’s lore 🥰🥰