#he's deranged

[vintageseawitch]

moderator: will you veto an abortion ban if it comes across your desk, yes or no?

trump: blah blah blah, i'm the greatest, i got the most votes in history, everyone wanted Roe v Wade overturned, i worked the hardest, the Supreme Court worked really hard, blah blah blah (no yes or no, btw)

moderator: as president, would you continue to aide Ukraine, yes or no

trump: blah blah blah, we need to stop the senseless killing, it's horrible, blah blah blah (still no yes or no ofc)

moderator: do you regret anything about Jan 6?

trump: blah blah blah, they let all their illegals in, crime is the worst it's ever been, the crime here is worse than the rest of the world, blah blah blah (no response once again)

we all know if he gave his true answers to both of these it wouldn't be good for him. either he's been coached or is still in enough of a "sound" mind to know this & we ALL know what his answers are: he's in bed with putin & wants Russia to win which could lead the way to chaos in the rest of Europe. as for abortion, have you heard jd vance speak at all? he hates women & abortions should be banned no exceptions. someone getting raped & pregnant as a result of it is "AN INCONVENIENCE." he plans to support a national ban.

he doesn't care what happened on January 6th. HE STILL BELIEVES IN THE LIE THAT HE WON. he seems confused. should we be concerned?

[willowser]

"oh! hey, c'mere, i gotta show you something funny!"

whatever nonsense satoru had been planning on spouting is tucked away the instant he sees your coy little grin, and one of his own grows on his face, made brighter and wider by the ease of your invitation.

yes, he's just spent the last seven minutes in your doorway, silent and scheming, thinking on what to say to attract your attention — but it doesn't matter if that's now been disrupted, because he'd take your attention any way it can be served, cold or hot. it's warm today; that much he can tell by the way you beam at him, as he comes to stand beside you.

you dig through the top drawer of your desk for a minute or two, and satoru is bubbling with things to say, now, about the little mess you keep there, but he gets distracted by the hurried, chalky handprints staining the material covering your ass. the sight makes him grin so hard that his cheeks swell, nudging his blindfold up the littlest bit; satoru finds it invigorating, this innate ability you have to fluster him. the heat in his face is surely visible, even to someone like you.

"aha!" you dance back and forth on your feet for a second, stopping only when he starts to join you, excited, and then you hold up two dangly, jingling little things right in front of his face. "a student's sister is selling these for school, and they made me think of you! so i bought us some to match!"

keychains, he realizes, suddenly sober. cute and colorful miniature ice bars.

"adorable, huh?" you pull them back to assess in your palm, touching gently at the plastic as if they were real, as if they could melt in the warmth of your hand. "which one do you want? the watermelon is the cutest, so i was gonna give you that one."

everything satoru had thought to say dissolves, leaks between his fingers, sugary and sweet. he's left with nothing, cold, then, smile frozen, as you fiddle with something so meaningless—

you look up, waiting for his response, and he watches you clock the change in his demeanor, instantly; you can't see cursed energy, but you can see — something, within him. always have been able to, though he's yet to figure out how.

"unless you want strawberry," you shrug, a little awkward now, but sunny as usual. "do you even have keys, actually, or do you—"

"no take-backs!" he snatches the dainty thing from your hand, sticking his tongue out at the flat look you send him. "i get watermelon!"

"fine," you pout for just a second before sticking your tongue out at him, too, and then you laugh quietly to yourself. amused, like a child.

once you start to dig around in your messy drawer for your car keys, satoru turns his attention to the tiny treat, focusing on it. trying to ignore the blood rushing in his ears.

it's so simple. so silly. you are, selfless and honest to a fault, all the traits that make you a liability in this world. if anything were to happen to your students, then you wouldn't make it. and if anything were to happen to you, satoru thinks—

right there in your presence, so close that he can hear your heartbeat peacefully thundering over his own — he can feel the cracks in his composure. how close he is to splintering off, how quickly everything would collapse if he dared to blink wrong.

if anything were to happen to you, satoru thinks, he'd go insane. he already has.

a small laugh leaves him, at the thought, but he closes his fist around the small keychain when you look up at him again. still grinning, leaning in so close that you're about to be stopped.

"do you like it?" you ask, open and hopeful and silly.

it makes him laugh again, because you really have no idea.

[sarnai4]

Cleanliness in Viking Times

This is probably a weird title and it's most likely just as weird of a post. I've been thinking about some moments in RTTE and DoB and have come to this conclusion: I think Dagur's probably one of the cleanest Vikings at least in the show. This is more than me just being sad about the idea of him stinking. There are some actual scenes that support the idea.

Dagur is the only character to call Mildew smelly. We know everyone had to forcibly bathe Gobber (which I'm going to pretend doesn't sound like some type of crime), but the Berkians never mention Mildew. I think that other people on Berk smell so bad that they can't tell he also is a problem. Berk does notoriously have Boot Night, so I'm genuinely not even surprised that their senses of smell have just kinda stopped working. Meanwhile, Mildew is just "smelly old man" to Dagur.

There's the matter of table manners too. Between complaining about his dad and being willing to have Tuffnut suddenly be the member of the Riders with the least legs, Dagur makes it clear that he doesn't want to hear smacking. He's the only character to complain about this too. When we see him eating around Gustav, he's even using a fork and knife. I genuinely don't think I've seen another character so much as hold a fork before, but I could be wrong (Am I?? Seriously curious if I just zoned out).

When he's stuck in the cave on that one island after turning good, he already has some water and cloths ready. He didn't have to grab anything when Toothless wasn't feeling well. It was just ready for our resident Night Fury. So, they could be wash cloths.

Dagur admits to liking fruit baths. I didn't know these existed, but I almost want to try one out. Maybe it just gives you that perfume/cologne smell as soon as you're done. Saves a step. I'd ask him if he was real.

Finally, Dagur gets surprised in the second to last episode when he thinks they have unexpected guests since he didn't have time to get cleaned up for their arrival. That's got to prove it, right? I really might be looking too far into this, but I enjoy the idea of him being sanitary.

[kami-scribbles]

So there’s this whimsical guy...

[wandaxpietro]

everything goes so slow for pietro i am 100% convinced he's incredibly terminally online to get his dopamine hits. he's so active on twitter people are worried about him. he keeps getting suspended bcuz he keeps sending people death threats and doxxing them and then has to call tony up so he can pay to get his accound back. he shows up in front of houses of people he beefs with. he fights with teenagers online all day. the official avengers twitter account has him blocked.

[reiketsui]

archer can act so polite but if that's not needed he'll just casually compliment your bone structure while telling about his side hobby of doing forensic autopsies

[battlevann]

the draft/ alternate version of mine to keep is just the

"Christina do you want some water?"

"SOMEBODY SEDATE MEEEEEEE"

bit from greys anatomy

[h4unted--h0use]

spending the night at @gay-teletubby 's house.

just got here and she's already playing apple bottom jeans. this is a great start

[aridatinas-art]

something something ... Stanford "Why didn't Rudolf just kill the other reindeer?" Pines and Fiddleford "I create death-mechas when my feelings get hurt" McGucket

[massivetittiesandwarcrimes]

I need Dick to be completely delusional about Tim and consider him to be his nicest, most helpful, and most well-behaved sibling.

_____

Tim: I have never done anything wrong, ever, in my life.

Dick: I know this and I love you 🥰

Jason: ...Dick, are you fucking HIGH???

_____

Dick: You should consider trying to be more like Tim! He's always such a well-behaved angel ❤️

Tim: Thank you, Dick 😇

Damian:

________

Dick: Tim is very kind and always so polite! He would never be mean to someone on purpose! ❤️

Bruce, who is bullied by Tim an average of 4.5 times a day:

______

Dick: Tim is an absolute sweetheart!

Cass: ... I do not think that word means what you think it does.

_____

Duke, staring at a warehouse that he and Tim just 'accidentally' blew up: ... So how mad do you think Dick is going to be at us?

Tim: Don't worry, I got this.

Dick, landing next to them: Holy explosion, Red Robin! What happened here?!?

Tim: I don't know 😔. It was like this when we got here 🥺.

Duke, whispering: There is no way he's going to believe tha-

Dick: Oh no! Well, I'm just glad you two are safe!

Duke: ... Tim, I need you to teach me your ways.

Dick: hm? Did you say something, Duke?

________

Dick: I don't get it! Why does everyone think Tim is some kind of crazed feral gremlin?!?

Alfred: I believe that is because they have in fact met Master Tim.

Dick: What was that? 🙃

Alfred: ... 😮‍💨 Truly it is a mystery for the ages.

[bluef00t]

The Shawn & Gus dynamic in Psych is so subtly yet beautifully shaped by the fact that they cast a naturally deadpan introvert to play the world's most hyperactive attention-seeking detective, then cast a chronic theater kid to play his supposedly boring, reasonable best friend

[inkpotsprite]

I've never seen someone so happy to have a flaming sword in their chest. Never change, Tim.

[chloesimaginationthings]

I can’t believe FNAF crying child never got an official name,,

[starry-bi-sky]

on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.

Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.

Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.

Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.

There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.

[ofswordsandpens]

This Kid's Not Alright

perseus // unknown // The Battle of the Labyrinth, Rick Riordan // unknown // The House of Hades, Rick Riordan // unknown // @ vialjarhorn // The Last Olympian, Rick Riordan // The House of Hades, Rick Riordan // @ dying-dog // The House of Hades, Rick Riordan // brutal, Olivia Rodrigo // The Mark of Athena, Rick Riordan // unknown // The Gods Show Up, Michael Kinnucan // The Chalice of the Gods, Rick Riordan

[poltoreveur]

I could fix him but I kinda like him a little murderous and psychotic tho