#he’s no precious cinnamon roll and that’s okay!!!

[zutaralesbian]

Ian was an ass for calling Mickey a coward because he was afraid of Terry. Like, no other way around that one

[coconut530]

So the boy possesses the All-Seeing Eyes of the Gods, does he?

[theeldermillennial]

THIS ENTIRE INTERACTION IS SO PURE

"I'm like you now....a Demon!"

("You precious, precious little cherub...")

*heart shattered*

(can't even) "Sorry! Sorry!" XD

(so innocent)

"You really think you're a demon?"

(complete toddler meltdown) "I'm a Fallen Angel!"

("Ohh, he actually believes he's going to Hell. Alright...let's de-escalate things a bit.")

"I LIED...to thwart the Will of God!" (this poor lamb)

"Well yeah, you did but...I'm not going to tell anyone. Are you?"

(You sweet, precious, dear, little cinnamon roll . It's going to be okay. Bildad the Shuhite is guarding over you.)

"Well....then nothing has to change!"

[pyxxiestyxx]

Rosebud

Ryan sighed, leaning against the door to his room. He had been locking himself in here the past few days now, though he knew the weed could easily enter whenever she wanted. Hell, she could probably rip the damn door off its hinges if she needed to. Still, an ounce of comfort was better than nothing.

He slowly slid to the floor, holding Sinna close. The weed had given it to him when he had woken up, a large plush cinnamon roll about a foot and a half in diameter. She had told him that the plush was his to have and hold and name, and he had quickly grown close to the thing. Every time he squeezed it, it released this really nice puff of citrus scent that reminded him of home on Remula, to the point that he had even begun talking to it.

He was definitely a little concerned about his mental state when it started talking back, though.

"Hey Sin, um…am I…am I going to be okay?" He couldn't help but blush a little as he held the plush out, seeing the cute simplistic smiley face on the side of the roll.

"Absolutely, dear! Why, what's wrong?" The voice he pictured was a cute one, very feminine and soothing.

"I…its just…between what happened at class today, and how Luca…how Violet has already accepted her place as a…as a floret…I'm just scared that I'm going to be next, you know? I don't want to be a floret!"

"Awww, but honey bun…you'd make a precious little girl for your Owner!" Ryan blushed at that, shaking his head rapidly but not replying. For some reason, the plush insisted that Ryan was actually a trans woman, like Violet. Which…which was…not what he wanted, nononono definitely not nope nu uh.

"Do you mind if I use that name we talked about, dear? I loved it sooooo much, and it was sooooo cute so see your smile~" He shrugged, looking away and biting his lip, so Sinna continued, "My little Roooooose~"

Rose…Ryan blushed, hiding his face in Sinna at the mention. "ofdgbnokmsfkoghmno."

"Rooooosey poseeeey, its okay. Its okay to be scared. But your Owner loves you lots and lots, and she won't never ever ever let you forget it. Why don't you talk to her a little?" A burst of orange scent around them, and she relaxed…he relaxed?

…she relaxed.

"I…okay. Um…where are you then?" Rose knew who had been talking to her, she wasn't that dumb. But the pretending had helped, in a way. Talking to Sinna the cinnamon roll was a lot easier than talking to Sinaforte the Owner, Second Bloom.

There was a quiet knock on the door, and Rose slid out of the way as the lock clicked open, and the door swung inward. Sin smiled down at her, holding the microphone that let her speak through the plushie.

"Let's chat then, Rosie."

[luveline]

steve!! i miss him too :( what about a cute kbd christmas fic?

kbd —the harrington's start preparing for christmas. mom!reader, 2k

When you get home to absolute silence, you assume your kids have been abducted and your husband murdered. When you find the laundry baskets have been moved off of the stairs and the mountain of little shoes by the door has been lined up neatly, you guess the killers must've cleaned after it happened. 

You forget the stiffness of your back and pinched toes. Arms full of grocery bags, you shoulder into the living room with your tongue between your teeth. “Oh,” you say, breathing out, “good. You're alive.” 

Your girls are sitting in a wavy row. Avery lays with a long leg hanging over one couch arm, littlest Wren by her side swaddled and propped with pillows. Dove sits at Wren's other side with her rainbow Teddy bear in her lap. Bethie, precious sweetheart, is sleeping smushed against the opposite armrest with Steve's sweatshirt over her lap.

“Hey, honeys,” you say quietly, so as not to disrupt their mild moods, “everyone okay?” 

“Yeah, mom,” Avery says without looking away from the TV. 

“What about you, Dove? You okay?” 

“Yis,” she says shortly. 

You turn to the TV, confused. What could be interesting enough to hook them both? Even Wren seems to be watching the TV, her tiny face demure. 

“What's this?” you ask, squinting, before a familiar white beagle takes to the screen. “Oh, it's A Charlie Brown Christmas!” 

“Mommy, can you please be bit quieter, please?” Dove asks. 

You snort and hurry past them to the kitchen. The smell of homemade cinnamon rolls envelopes you, the heat of the oven warming your wind-nipped nose. “Hey,” you say, though you can't actually see your husband anywhere. 

He pops up from behind the kitchen table with water dripping down one wrist, a rag in hand. “Hey!” he says, ditching the rag in a bowl of suds, quick to wipe his hands dry on his chest and stand. “I didn't hear you. You forget how to yell?” 

“And disturb the peace?” You sigh in relief as he takes the heavier bag from your wrist to push onto the clean countertop. “Thanks.” He takes the other bags. “Thanks, baby.” 

“Y'welcome,” he says easily. He looks like he's had a long day in that his shirt is wet in four different places and in three different colours, but he looks happy, cheeks a red hue and almond eyes creased with a familiar fondness. 

Steve's pretty much always happy to see you. You lay claim to at least two of his smile lines, and you love to feel them with your fingers to affirm that they're really there, he's really happy, in this life you made together. (An exhausting, lovely life.) You raise your hand to his cheek and cover one such wrinkle with your fingertips, tilting his face into one palm. “You've been busy today,” you say gently.  

“So busy. All the bedrooms, the bathrooms. Soon as I wipe down the baseboards in here, I'm done.” 

“Want me to do it?” 

“No way. You'll take all my glory.” He presses his smile into a flat line, though the love stays behind in his eyes. 

“I'm gonna look at everything just as soon as I put the groceries away, I can't believe it,” you say, kissing him chastely, then the corner of his mouth before pulling away. The soft brush of his lips lingers on yours, but nothing feels as good as the way he looks at you. “You didn't have to do it all, baby, I would've helped.” 

“Christmas will be here before we know it,” he says with an unbothered shrug. “It creeps up on us every year. I figured I better get the jump on it if I was gonna get it done, but then they've all been so weirdly well behaved. Dove hasn't cried once.” 

“Bethie's sleeping, you know?” 

He takes your arm before you can turn away and works you into a hug. 

“I know,” he says, cupping the back of your head. “Was Wren alright?” 

“Best big sister is looking after her.” 

“God, we don't deserve her. She's not stressed, is she?” 

Avery loves being a big sister, but you're both wary of how she might feel responsible for things she shouldn't have to be responsible for. “She looked fine. They were watching TV.” 

Steve gives you a steady, soft squeeze. You press your nose down into his shoulder with your arms curled around him to breathe him in. He smells of disinfectant, the sugary Christmas one that the girls can't get enough of. Avery begs him to spray down the bath before she gets in so it'll smell nice, and every time he promises her he'll buy her a bottle of bubble bath, but a little disinfectant isn't bad for her, anyways. From over Steve's shoulder you can see he's used it well, every surface sparkling clean, no corner or speck of grime left to survive. 

You kiss his shoulder. “You really didn't have to, Stevie, but thank you. It's amazing in here.” 

He hums into the side of your head. “I love you.” 

You totally, totally get it. You'd clean a hundred houses for him, even with four girls badgering you as you go. 

“Love you too. You finish the baseboards, I'll put the groceries away, and we'll sit down before they realise they're being well-behaved.” 

Steve likes your plan, leaving you with a last little squeeze to get done cleaning. You sort through what's in the fridge, throwing away stuff past due, noting on the whiteboard stuck to the fridge what's about to go bad soon, as well as the dates for the meat. What you've bought today should last for at least two weeks, but it never really does. 

You keep some of the Christmas goodies on the counter and hide the rest away atop the cabinets out of sight. 

Avery runs in as you're taking off your shoes. “Mom, Bethie's crying about something.” 

“Oh no. Thanks, babe, I'll be right there.” 

You sneak a peek at Steve before you go. His brow furrowed in concentration, the muscle of his upper arm tenses and releases with every scrub of the baseboard. It's… Well, you married well. 

Beth cries on the couch, she and Dove pulling at the same dark blob of material while Wren looks on in quiet confusion. She's too small to sit, laid on her back, but she's started turning her head, following people and their movements, and when she sees you, she smiles. It's a very Steve-like expression. 

“Hello,” you say, picking her up carefully, kissing her little head. “Let's get you out of the splash zone, sweetheart.” 

“Mom, she took daddy's hoodie!” 

“I want it!” 

“What if I go get another one of daddy's hoodies?” you ask, attempting a swift defusing. “How's that? We can all have one.” 

“I want this one,” Beth insists. 

“I want it,” Dove says, glaring at her older sister. 

Bethie is a gentle soul that won't pull it out of Dove's hands, even when she maybe should. She cries and balls her hands into the fabric to stop from losing it completely, sending you a desperate frown, “Mom, please, I had it first.” 

“Yes you did, honey. Dove.” You look her straight in her little face, knowing this won't end well. “Bethie had it first, okay? You can have it later, but until then, I can go get you one for yourself.” 

Dove hates that. Wren hates that Dove hates it, and everybody starts crying. Avery didn't follow you out of the kitchen, likely kept behind by Steve to save her from the coming massacre, but she'd probably start crying too from the sheer overwhelming volume. 

Can't have everything, you think. 

“Dove, don't make me call daddy in here. Take your hands off of daddy's sweatshirt. Now, please.” 

Dove shrieks and lets go of it, throwing herself down off of the couch to cry into the beanbag instead. She kicks her legs, and Beth looks shocked at the outcome, any victory overwritten by guilt. She climbs off of the couch with her arm already held out to give Dove the sweater, but you stop her. 

“That's yours, baby, you keep it. Daddy gave that to you.” 

“I'm not being a good sharer,” Bethie says. 

“There's enough to go around,” you promise her. Dove's just showing off ‘cos you've said no, not because there's something special about that sweatshirt. Sure, it has a reindeer on the chest, but Steve has tens of Christmas sweatshirts. 

You get to a point as a parent where the crying becomes white noise, and you can manage one at a time or none at all. Bethie nods, and you lean down to give her tearstained cheek a kiss before turning to Dove with Wren grizzling in your arms. She can't decide if she's upset or not, it seems. 

“Dovey, don't be angry at me, please? Let's go get you another one. Okay? You could even have one of mommy's, if you wanted.” 

Not good enough. She cries and cries and cries until Steve enters the room, his confusion dramatised as he holds out his hands to her. “Dove! What's wrong, sweetheart?” 

“Mom won't– mommy won't–” She sobs. “I want that one.” 

“Mommy's just doing what I asked her to,” Steve says, bending down at the waist to meet her eyes. “So be mad at me, okay? Mommy didn't do it, I told her that that one's for Beth. How about we go and get you another one?” 

Dove immediately takes his hand, appeased now she has someone on her side. You flop down on the couch as they walk away together with one last child to soothe. Wren goes down easy. All she wants is some shushing and back patting. 

“Is it over?” Avery asks, tiptoeing back into the room. 

You laugh. “Yeah, it's over. Sorry.” 

“I'm sorry for hiding,” she says. 

“There's nothing wrong with sitting somewhere quiet when things are too loud, bub. You gonna come and finish your movie? We can get dad to rewind it for us.” You hold out an arm. She sits in front of it with a smile like she's been given the world. 

You really don't deserve your girl. 

Steve and Dove return changed. Steve's in clean pyjamas with wet cheeks, Dove drowned in one of Steve's snowman sweaters. He rewinds the movie without being asked, and he squeezes in beside Avery, and everyone lets out a simultaneous sigh of relief. 

He finds your shoulder across the back of the couch, feeling along it like he knows every curve and divot. It doesn't take long for you to settle in and relax, soothed as the girls had been by a touch of comfort. Your attention flickers between his peaceful face and the baby as she snores on your chest. 

“Snoopy is sooooo bad,” Bethie whispers happily, looking to her big sister for an agreement.  

“He's mischievous,” Avery says. 

“That's a big word,” you say, “where'd you learn that one, honey?” 

Steve pats your arm. He doesn't say anything, just lets you know he's there with you. 

“We're reading a book about Santa at school and they said all the mischievous kids end up on the naughty list.” 

“That's not necessarily true.” You kiss her forehead. “You girls are mischievous, but you're still good girls.” 

“I'm not mist-jiv-us,” Beth denies. 

“You're the most mist-jiv-us,” Steve says, “I know what you're up to, Bethie bear. I always know.”

“I'm not up to anything!” she denies, giggling at his accusatory tone. 

“I am naughty,” Dove says. 

You and Steve laugh at the same time. “Only a little,” Steve says. 

“A lot!” Avery says. 

Dove just laughs and lays back against Steve's chest. Avery languishes between you and Steve like a princess, propping her leg over your thigh, and Beth snuggles into your arm. You breathe in the smell of Wren's hair, totally relaxed in the squeaky clean depths of the living room, your family finally in one place. 

Steve deserves a great, huge, heaping thank you, but you don't have anything to give him. You turn to him over Avery's head, trying to think of what to say to him to express how grateful you are for all that effort and love, years of it, but when he meets your eyes you know he already knows what you want to say. 

“Can we pretend there's mistletoe or something?” he asks, looking down to your lips, his own pursed into a longing pout. 

“Yeah, Stevie,” you say, lifting your chin invitingly. “Wow, look, there's mistletoe! You know what that means.” 

You can feel the shape of his smile when he kisses you, and though he keeps it short and sweet, that evening his hand stays on your arm for hours drawing hearts between iterations of your name, one loving letter at a time.  

[lilybug-02]

Human meets cookie run but wouldn't it be short? Munch monch consume cookies? Or maybe a baker human so they are just. Interested in the flavors/names of the cookies instead of eating them...

It’s okay. I’m pretty sure an adult human could probably sustain themselves just by eating the f*cking trees themselves. Have you looked at the materials the cookies get from their surroundings?? Sugar Rocks, cinnamon roll trees, lollipop flowers???

Screw the cookies, I’m eating the GROUND.

Also, you could not make me eat Custard Cookie the Third. He’s too precious.

[duckchu]

… Hello, I hope it's not rude I'm just looking for drabbles or anything League of Legends since I'm in the mood to read the LoL fandom content after being away for a while…

Coincidentally when I found out about Heartsteel when I was watching anime edits with LoL songs and I was like WTH??! And an idea came up and now I'm hungry for some crackhead and platonic cuteness (For Yone + Yasu) and romance (for othe boys).

So can I please ask for headcannons or drabbles (you can choose which is easier) of the Heartsteel Boys (Kayn, Aphelios, Sett and Ezreal separately) having a crush on F! Reader who is a game streamer and is the little sister of Yone and Yasu who is the living example of Wife Material with an affectionate and bubbly cinnamon roll personality?

She likes to take care of her siblings even though she's the youngest (Yone and Yasu would kill if someone hurt her, good luck running away from them) and spoils them rotten! Are they both always busy and stressed with the whole band and Idol thing?

No problem, she, with her divine culinary skills, cooks their favorites or prepares them a lunch box with nutritious homemade food or brings them some snacks after an exhausting day of recording MVs and songs. (Sometimes she likes to deliver it in person, especially if they are showing hints of extreme exhaustion).

Sore muscles? Nah, her angelic hands know how to work and ease any tension and pain. Do they need a shoulder to vent on? Okay, she's there ready to listen and support her siblings and shower them with comfort and words of affirmation when they're on the verge of burning out.

Trouble sleeping and sleep schedule being a mess? Enjoy her divine voice when she sings and Yone and Yasu are out in seconds for a nice nap (Yasu looks dead when he naps on her lap, if it weren't for his noisy snoring while Yone looks like a cat almost purring when she massage his scalp with her fingers lmao) or a good night's sleep.

Need help with other household tasks? Fear not, she is ready to help! Do any conflicts or fights arise? She is a good mediator! Someone being a brat? Nah, she just needs to look strictly and sternly and that's enough for them to stop being brats and shut up.

But she's also the precious cinnamon roll who is the kind of cinnamon roll who can kick ass if someone is being toxic and mean to her brothers because when she's really mad it's not a pretty sight… (Yone and Yasu are secretly highkey traumatized from the first time she got really mad when they saw her pissed off frown when she threatened to beat up a bully who picked on Yasu when they were younger).

But also her brothers overworking themselves? Nuh-uh! Not when she's watching! She doesn't care if she's the youngest, she'll scold them as if she were the the oldest and they are going to listen to what she wants to say, willing or not!

(My lil brainrot bonus: Here was a time that everyone in True Damage saw Yasu who was kneeling on the floor in front of his little sister for fear of irritating her even more while still being scolded for over an hour for neglecting his health while he was running on energy drinks and fast food and messing with his sleeping schedule, she understands that he is part of a famous band but it doesn't stop her from saying 'I know how important music is to you, but for Heavens' sakes! Don't sacrifice your health Yasu! I don't want to receive the news that you passed out and I have to visit you in a hospital bed!')

Holy...this is a long request but also this was my reaction reading it

I've decided to do headcanons since I feel their easier to showcase all of their personalities (also decided to add platonic K'Sante)

Kayn

When he first saw you, he thought you were lame

You came on set to give Yone some food and he noticed how bubbly you were

But then he had a thought

You were kinda cute

So he nabbed some food from Yone

And laughed as you protested

Which got him an elbow between the ribs from you

Next day he was surprised to see you come to the shoot again, this time with food for all of them

Decided he needed you to be his wife

Started flirting with you mercilessly

Yone wasn't pleased

But you looked so cute flustered~

It was only to cover his own embarrassment tho

It's not his fault you're just perfect for him

A cute little thing for him to ruin ~

Aphelios

When he saw you, it was love at first sight

Like heart eyes all that jazz

Yone noticied

But honestly, he prefers him to for example Kayn

How could Phel not fall for you?

You were just perfect

Every time you came by to make sure Yone wasn't overworking himself, you were so sweet to him

Sometimes even bringing by food for him

He always thought he wasn't really the guy to fall in love

But there you were, making him all soft

Ezreal

You were just Yone's little sister, no one to be bothered about

But why did he feel so warm everytime you came over?

And you did often to check up on Yone

And Ezreal always thought you didn't mean much to him

But there he was, head over heels for you

And slowly realising it

And so was everyone else

The way he was stealing glances everytime you were busy with something

If looks could kill, he'd be dead

At least that's what he thought from the way Yone was glaring at him

Sett

At the begining, he didn't think much of you

You were just Yone's sister, someone who came over frequently but that was that

Untill he started noticing how you treated everyone

You were really kind, always bringing over something to eat and a shoulder to cry on

How could he not fall in love with you?

Yone's gonna kill him, but it's worth it

K'Sante

He met during an unfortunate situation

It was him finding out Aphelios replaced his protein powder with flour

He was furious

Almost killed Aphelios right in front of you

But you were a great meditator so you managed to make Aphelios live to see another day

And K'Sante gained a person to talk to

Since he's usually the one giving out advice, he has problems with opening up himself

But you were so nice to him and didn't push him at all so it became natural

Especially if you were staying for the night and he happened tobe grabbing a glass of water at the same time as you

[psychedelic-ink]

𝐀𝐬 𝐈𝐭 𝐖𝐚𝐬 - 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫'𝐬 𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐈𝐧 𝐁𝐞𝐝

pairing: pre outbreak!joel miller x f!reader, one sided tommy miller x f!reader

series summary: After your grandfather’s passing, you find yourself moving into his home in Texas. You meet the Millers; Tommy, his older brother Joel and his daughter Sarah. With time, you and Tommy become close friends and Sarah visits you often. But Joel…Joel keeps his distance. The reason for this is due to one crucial fact you don’t know but he does; Tommy has a crush on you. Which means you’re off limits no matter what. But as your own feelings for Joel grow, things start to get more and more complicated.

word count: 2.6k

chapter summary: you decide to host a New Year's party and when Joel shows up soaked to the bone thanks to the rain, you lead him to the bathroom to dry him up.

warnings: piv, secret relationship, dirty talk, joel getting really creative with the shower head

a/n: let's just consider this little fic an alternative version of the question "what if the outbreak didn't happen plus tommy still doesn't know about you and joel" Normally he would learn before outbreak day no matter if the outbreak happens or not but I wanted to keep the sneaking around bit for this one soooo

I would also like to thank everyone who has been following the story! Every comment is precious to me and I appreciate it more than you realize. I'm so happy people are still enjoying it, I have big plans for this series and I will be finishing it spring time. I hope the new year brings you all peace and happiness, happy new year everyone!

**divider by the talented @saradika-graphics xx

Rain washes away everything. It washes away the dirt of the street, rejuvenates the drying trees, makes the grass greener. In Austin rain truly is a blessing. Every living thing hungers for it. To you, it symbolizes the new beginnings and the losses. You half listen to the chatter between Olivia and Tommy as you peek out the window, smooth drops cascading down the surface. For some, the rain wasn’t an ideal weather to have during New Year’s, but to you, it only made the atmosphere cozier. 

The crowded party buzzes around you, people laughing, dancing, and sharing stories. You can't help but notice familiar faces from the community seamlessly mingling with Tommy and Olivia's friends, since you were still relatively new you didn’t know many people other than neighbors and asked them to invite people. The room echoes with the joy of New Year's Eve.

It’s been a painful yet surprising year, to say the least. The loss of your grandfather, the unexpected move, the journey to find yourself. . . all of it had been a bit much, a bit daunting. However, as your mind drifts off to the new room in the old house you realize that some things are truly different. You have people who care about you now. You have the Miller’s, Olivia, your art. All in all, it had also been an amazing year. 

The thought makes guilt gnaw at your insides. Tommy still doesn’t know about you and Joel, you were supposed to tell him. . .Joel was supposed to tell him but alas neither of you found the courage to come clean. The past couple of months had been so blissful with him. Neither of you wanted to give that up. 

The faint smell of cinnamon reaches your nose and you find yourself smiling even though you’re only slightly worried. 

Joel’s late. 

“He’s fine,” you hear Tommy whine, turning around you see him rolling his eyes. “He’s a big boy, sweetheart. He’ll be okay in a little bit of rain.” 

Big boy, indeed. 

“Where is he anyway?” Olivia asks, stuffing her mouth full of crackers. 

“He went to drop off Sarah—and there’s plenty of food, you’re not off to war you know. You can eat one at a time.” 

Olivia slapped Tommy’s shoulder and took a seat next to him, “Bit weird she’s not gonna be here with us.” 

“Sarah’s been beggin’ Joel for months. Finally, he caved when she pulled the ‘you know how hard it’s been for me to make friends’ card. Poor man didn’t stand a chance.” 

“So,” you continue, sitting across from them. “They spent Christmas together, just the two of them. That was Joel’s deal. And she’s doing her own laundry for two months.” 

“Damn, I hope the party is worth it.” Olivia gives you a mischievous grin, her eyes lighting up as they meet your gaze. "You know," she starts, leaning in slightly, "I have this friend, Jake. . .” 

You cut her off, "I'm good, Liv. I'm not looking for anything right now."

"Oh, come on! He's sweet, handsome, and he's got a great sense of humor. You two would hit it off."

Your gaze quickly shifts between Tommy and Olivia. His expression tightens ever so slightly, and you catch the subtle change. Olivia, oblivious, or at least choosing to be, continues.

"Just imagine it. A romantic date, a nice dinner, maybe a movie... He’ll treat you right and if he doesn’t I’ll break his arms."

"Liv, really, I appreciate it, but I'm not ready for that kind of thing. Besides, I'm pretty content with how things are right now."

Olivia narrows her eyes. "It’s been a year, you’re ready for one date. Trust me." Then, much to your horror, she turns to Tommy and gestures to you. “Back me up Tommy, isn’t she ready?” 

Tommy clears his throat, looking uncomfortable as ever. He parts his lips and worry knots itself deep in your stomach. 

Luckily, you’re saved by a slightly drunk woman you don’t recognize and let out a break of relief. She situates herself next to Tommy, throwing a hand over his broad shoulder, she pulls him close and whispers something in his ear, fingers playfılly dancing over the fabric of his shirt. Olivia rolls her eyes but honestly, you’re happy and grateful for the distraction. 

You’re saved a second time when the door opens, the sudden sound of rain drawing your attention. You smile instinctively upon seeing Joel, which is a bit rude you figure, because he looks miserable. His leather jacket is dripping, hair sticking to his forehead. Just how hard was it pouring outside? Must’ve picked up when you, Olivia, and Tommy were chatting along. 

Joel, with dropped shoulders and head, spots Tommy first and then you. He makes his way, the defeated walk making him look like a teenager. Tommy bursts out laughing when he sees his older brother, the sound deepens the furrow between Joel’s brows. 

“You look like shit!” Tommy says and you notice Olivia desperately trying to hide her laughter behind her palm. 

“It’s rainin’ cats and dogs you jackass.” Your eyes move up gradually up his body. The rain had darkened the color of his shirt, the flimsy fabric sticking to the planes of his chest. Heat rises to your cheeks. “Is there anythin’ I can burrow sweet tea? Maybe somethin’ that August left behind?” 

“What?” you clear your throat, blinking, you meet his gaze. His knowing smile is enough to set fire between your legs. “Sorry didn’t quite catch that.” 

“Shirt,” he says, lips curling. “Unless you want me drippin’ all over your couch, somethin’ dry would be nice.” He raises a brow when you continue to stare at him, dazed. “Maybe your brother left behind somethin’?” 

Oh god, he’s spelling every word slow and careful meaning he definitely knows you’ve been ogling him. You get up quickly, ignoring the proximity between your bodies, you’d expected him to take a step back but he was as still as stone. You’re like an open book, hopefully, the pretty lady perched next to Tommy is enough to distract him. 

“Yeah, sure,” you answer, breathing a bit heavily. You don’t need to say anything else as you begin to part the crowd, leading him upstairs to the bathroom. You can feel him right behind you, the heat radiating off of him warming your back. 

Finally reaching the bathroom, you push him inside and quickly close the door, leaning against it, you let out a breath. 

However, you don’t get to breathe in when you feel a pair of lips against your own. You shudder as his soaked chest presses against yours, hands cupping your waist, Joel guides your hips towards him. He’s hard as a rock. He swallows the soft voices climbing up your throat and grinds roughly against you. 

“Fuck, honey,” he rasps, dragging his lips to your cheek. “You really know how to get a man goin’.” 

“I didn’t even do anything.” 

“You starin’ at me like you’re about to devour me ain’t nothin’.” he nips at your neck, your body burning at the sharpness. “I’ve missed you too.” 

“Don’t remember saying that,” you tease and thread your finger through the wet locks. “You’re cold.”

“You should warm me up then.” 

You slip your hands under his shirt, not missing the way he shudders against you. He brings his lips back up, only an inch away, but refuses to close the distance. You keep stroking him. Warm palms moving up and down against cold and damp skin. Joel’s forehead drops onto yours. 

“You do realize there’s a party going on outside right? A part that includes your brother, who we are keeping us a secret from.” 

“For someone worried about the crowd you’re doin’ a whole lot to tempt me, darlin’.” he kisses your jaw. “You look beautiful by the way.” 

You’re happy to hear that because he was the only reason why you decided to wear a low-cut shimmering silver dress. You had also opted to wear an almost sheer pair of black stockings underneath, giving your legs a lovely glow.  

“Why thank you, kind sir.” 

“I love it when you call me sir,” he groans and presses harder against you. Your eyes flutter closed but despite it, you can feel his gaze taking in the bathroom. “You fancied up the place quite a bit.” 

A hoarse laughter escapes your throat, “You should thank the crowd downstairs for the fancy towels and the smell of vanilla.” 

“You know. . . now that I’m thinkin’ about it it ain’t fair I’m the only one wet.” 

“Believe me, Joel, I am soaking wet.” 

“That’s not what I meant sunshine,” he gives you a lopsided smile before tugging you towards the tub. “Come’re.”

You wordlessly follow him into the porcelain, your curiosity piqued. His fingertips trace up your waist and find the hidden zipper, slowly, he tugs it down, the sound of it inaudible from the beating of your heart. The dress pools under your knees and your gaze is fixed on him as you step out of the soft fabric. While you’re taking in the sight of his hair curling on his forehead, he takes in the sight of the soft contours of your body. He presses a soft kiss against your stomach, a shudder crawls up your spine. 

“Turn around.” He orders, voice dropping to a whisper. 

“What about my stockings?” 

“I’ll take care of’em.” 

You brace your hand against the wall, sticking your ass out, you smile when you hear the hitch of his breath. His knuckles follow the curve of your spine and a second later you hear a loud rip. 

“Joel—“

“I’ll get you new ones.” You feel him reaching up and at the same time, he slides your panties to the side. He hums. “You are wet.”

“Told you so.”

You hear a soft click, you’re barely able to register the sound as he begins to dip between your folds and stroke. Somehow your brain whispers to you that he’s adjusting the pressure of the shower head. “What are you doing back there?” 

“Remember when you told me how much you enjoyed the different settings when I changed the pipes and the shower head?” You honestly didn’t. “Well, I haven’t, darlin’.” 

He turns on the water, away from you thankfully, but you still tense at how cold it is as it gathers at the bottoms of your feet. 

“I know baby, I know. It’ll get warmer soon.” 

And it does. Your body relaxes, the subtle warmth prompting the arch of your back. Joel gently pushes your legs apart, pushing the shower head between your legs directly onto your—

“Oh god—Joel, fuck—“

“Such a filthy mouth for such a good girl,” he says into your ear. “Bet you’ve done this before sweetheart.” 

You had, well. . . You tried. But it hadn’t felt as good at this. A single forceful stream of insistent water massages your clit. The arousal that pulses between your legs is washed away down your thighs. Without even realizing you start to hold your breath and embarrassingly enough you roll your hips. 

You need more. You need him. 

Your legs part wider, trembling as you try to tell him but instead of sentences needy whimpers echo from your throat. You feel his smile on the back of your neck, teeth scraping your warm skin every time your hips twitch. He starts moving the showerhead and your entire body goes numb. It’s so much but so little at the same time. 

“You’re being loud, sweetheart.” You shake your head, trying desperately to bite back the moans. “But maybe you like the idea of our friends hearing how needy you get for me.” 

You clench at the words, nails scraping against the smooth surface of the wall. 

“Please. . .” 

“Please what?” 

Damn him. 

“Fuck me,” you gasp out. “Fuck me please—I’m. . . I’m going insane.” As if to demonstrate your words, you grind down until the shower head spreads your folds, a groan reverberating in your throat as the water fills every inch. “Just fuck me, give me your cock.” 

“What if I say I want you to come like this?” 

You don’t even think as you answer, “I’ll cry.” 

He stills like the calm before the storm then bursts out laughing. Some logical part of your brain is urging you to shush him, remind him that people might hear but you can’t when he sounds so joyful. His deep voice full of life. 

“Fine, sweet tea, you win. Wouldn’t want you to cry durin’ New Year’s.” 

Joel turns off the water and you turn, facing him as he does. His eyes widen when you cup his cheeks, he’s so warm now, so soft from the steam. “Let’s head to my bedroom,” you mutter. “Auggie’s spare clothes are there anyway.” 

His hands softly land on your hips, thumbs moving over the waistband of your stockings. “You sure?” 

“I want to see you when you bury yourself into me.” 

That’s all he needs to hear before dragging you out of the bathroom. You both hurry, the sound of the party still lively downstairs. Luckily your bedroom is close to the bathroom so there isn’t much risk as you follow him out half naked, your sparkling dress in hand. 

As soon as you both enter the bedroom, his lips are on yours, pushing you towards the bed until the back of your knees hits the edge and you fall. He follows your dive, his weight pleasant on top of you. 

Feeling numb with want, you quickly tug his shirt off of him, and his hands fumble with his belt. Joel doesn’t even bother to take his pants off completely. He frees himself with one hand and pushes in without a word. You both moan, mouths inches apart from each other. Neither of you breaks away from the eye contact. It’s so intimate like this. Your cheeks burning at how naked you feel having him witness the parting of your lips, the flutter of your gaze. 

You feel so full, so complete. The slow drag of his cock making you see starts every time he presses forward, brushing against something devastating inside you with every move. Tears gather in your lashes and he kisses them away. Then he drags his lips down to your neck, sucking at nipping. Your breath catches in your throat, your back arching as you clench around him. He groans into your skin, thrusts becoming shallow and quick. 

“I’m not gonna last, honey,” he rasps. “Tell me where.” 

Just as he says that his hand slides between your bodies, finding your throbbing clit. He draws quick circles, your muscles constricting immediately. At the very last second Joel covers your mouth with his own, muffling your cry as you gush around him, insides twitching and pulsing. He swallows the sounds hungrily. “Where?” he growls against your lips. 

“On my pussy,” you gasp. “Want to feel you there.” 

He tugs at your bottom lip with his teeth before moving away, you spread your legs further, pushing yourself apart with two fingers. Your mouth waters at the sight of him. His hand wrapped tightly around his cock as he strokes himself. It doesn’t take him long to come undone. Your eyes roll when you feel it. The vicious spurt of his come, the way it drips. It feels like it lasts forever. He comes and comes and comes— painting you with his seed. 

When he’s done, he slips his softening cock back inside, pushing himself deeper into you. You both whimper in unison, and he nuzzles the crook of your neck.  You begin to play with the ends of his hair, nails scratching the back of his neck. 

“Happy New Year, Joel.” 

“Happy New Year, sweet tea.” 

[in1-nutshell]

Rodimus Prime dating buddy who is taller than him but is pretty shy and quiet? Basically like a precious cinnamon roll.

Also Rodimus is the little spoon when it comes to hugging

OH, and Rodimus always gets flustered when Buddy compliments him because it’s always sweet.

Oooh! Rodimus with another Tall Bot! Tried to mix things up a bit so no one gets confused.

Hope you enjoy!

Rodimus dating Tall Bot Buddy who's shy

SFW, Platonic, Romantic, Cybertronian reader

MTMTE

Rodimus, being the ship’s captain, wanted to get to know some of his crew. Sure, he knew that some of the crew members were here for a short time, but there was never any harm in getting to know one another. His optics found their way to Buddy a few times during his ‘Til all are One’ speeches.

It wasn’t hard to find them either.

Buddy being one of the tallest bots on the ship stood out like a sore thumb amongst their smaller friends.

“Hey, Mags!”--Rodimus

“Don’t call me that.”--Magnus

“So, who’s the tall bot over by Cyclonus?”--Rodimus

“That’s Buddy. They are one of the better bots on the ship. I’ve had the pleasure of working with them. They know how to get their reports done on time.”--Magnus

“Ignoring the side remark there, I bet they were a powerhouse during the war.”--Rodimus

“Actually, Buddy didn’t see too much of the war. They ended up being a bodyguard for several labs on off world outposts. They like quiet things Rodimus, something you should learn a little bit of.”--Magnus

“…I’m going to introduce myself.”--Rodimus

“…If you scare them off I will demolish you.”—Magnus

Rodimus made it his personal mission to know who this bot was.

It was a bit of a rough start with Rodimus literally summersaulting over to meet them. Which caused Buddy to involuntarily kick him in the chassis to the other end of the room.

Now, that same bot who had kicked him across the room and carried him to the med bay while apologizing profusely was on the floor of his habsuite picking the movie for date night.

“Okay Roddy, I’m at a tie. It’s either ‘Speed’ or ‘Grease’. I can’t pick which one to watch tonight.”--Buddy

“Hmmm…”--Rodimus

“Roddy? Hello, Lost Light to Rodimus, anyone in there?”--Buddy

“How did I get so lucky?”--Rodimus

“Well, I did get the deals for earth movies from that vender last stop--”--Buddy

“No, how did I get so lucky to have you as my lovely partner.”--Rodimus

“O-oh!”--Buddy

“Look at you! You’re adorable! You’re adorable looking face!”--Rodimus

“Roddy!”--Buddy

“Yes?”--Rodimus

“The movie? Please?”--Buddy

“Oh, ‘Grease’.”--Rodimus

“Thank—”--Buddy

“So I can slide over there and give you a hug and kiss your adorable face!”--Rodimus

“RODDY!”--Buddy

How did he get so lucky?

To have such a kind, sweet, caring, and absolute powerhouse of a bot to call his partner.

Maybe… Conjux?

No… not yet…

Rodimus has a bad habit of speaking for Buddy, since they were so quiet all the time. Buddy didn’t mind it at first, but it soon got annoying when they came to more personal things. They had a talk with him about him speaking for them.

Now Rodimus catches himself before he speaks, for the most part. But he is learning.

Rodimus loves to get Buddy flustered up, does not care if its in public or in private. Not that it would take much anyways.

“Hey Buddy, are you a camera?”--Rodimus

“Rodimus not now.”--Buddy

“Because every time I look at you I smile.”--Rodimus

“Rodimus—”--Buddy

“Are you a parking ticket?”--Rodimus

“Roddy, no—”--Buddy

“ ’Cause you got FINE written all over you.”--Rodimus

“… Rodimus we are in a meeting—”--Magnus

“Shh! I wanna see how this ends.”--Whirl

Magnus has written several memos about PDA to Rodimus.

Does he read them? Nope.

Buddy felt a little bad for Magnus and decided to take things into their own servos.

The next time Rodimus started up his one-liners, Buddy surprised their flusterness and shot back their own attacks.

“If I could breathe, you’d take my breath away every time.”--Rodimus

“Well, can I borrow your star map? Because I lost my way looking at your optics.”--Buddy

“Huh?!”--Rodimus

“Do you by any chance have an extra spark on you… you seemed to have stolen mine.”--Buddy

“…”--Rodimus

“Rod—”--Buddy

FWWOOOOOSSSHHHH!

“OH, SWEET PRIMUS HE’S FLAMING UP AGAIN! CYCLONUS! TAILGATE PASS ME THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER!”--Buddy

Rodimus exe has stopped working please try again later.

Buddy has to carry Rodimus to their shared habsuite. Speaking of habsuite, that is the place where Rodimus loves to be with Buddy the most. Mainly because Buddy becomes a bit more affectionate in private than in public.

Rodimus loves being the little spoon.

There are times that he’ll try and be the big spoon, but he always goes back to being the little spoon.

“Its going to happen tonight, Buddy! I can feel it!”--Rodimus

“And if it doesn’t?”--Buddy

“Then… you get to pick next date nights activities.”--Rodimus

“Deal.”--Rodimus

Next morning…

“Morning—oh c’mon!”--Rodimus

“Ahh… the sweet sounds of victory.”--Buddy

“I’ll do it next time.”--Rodimus

“Sure Roddy, sure.”--Buddy

[dreamwritesimagines]

Okay. Here me out. A headcannon:

Logan getting surprise gifts for Sunshine. Logan would buy something he knows Sunshine wants or something she mentioned liking one time but would send Theo in to give it to her. Like, he'd pump him up about it too

"Your mom really wants this but she'll only accept it if you give it to her, okay bub?"

Theo insists he understands but manages to tattle on himself every single time 

- "Oh my goodness! Thank you, Bean! I was just thinking about how much I wanted this. You sure you can't read minds?" 

"No but maybe Mr. Logan can! Cause he's the one who bought it."

"Maybe. But you gave it to me. And that's the most important part of giving a gift." Sunshine would say, booping Theo on the nose and giving him a tight hug with a million kisses. "Cause the one who gives the gift gets all the thanks! Thank you, Bean!"

"You're welcome, Mommy!" 

- Later Sunshine corners Logan about it

"Theo gave me the most gorgeous bracelet earlier today."

"Mhmm, he's a good kid."

"Yeah, the best. But I guess I'm gonna have to keep a closer eye on him to figure out what he's been selling to be able to afford 14k gold." 

Sunshine would pause to give Logan the opportunity to confess. He never does. 

"I should start by double checking my secret marijuana plant under the bed to see if he's clipping that. Or the communal meth lab in the basement, I would hate for him to hurt himself down there. Janice does NOT clean her station even though we've all asked her to a thousand times. Or maybe I'll just pull him out of school to make sure he has no one to sell to anymore."

"Alright, ya got me," Logan would turn around with folded arms

"No shit. That was an insane gift, Lo." Logan would mumble something about not worrying about it and would go back to whatever he was busying himself with

I LOVE THIS HEADCANON SO MUCH OH MY GOOOOD! 😍 HONEYYYY!😍 You're so talented, thank you so so much! ❤️

First of all, this is so like Logan! 😂 Like, he knows Sunshine won't accept it from him, he knows he should get Theo to get it to her but doesn't see that Sunshine would maybe question how exactly her little son got her an expensive af bracelet??? LIKE SIR? THAT'S A CHILD?? SUNSHINE KNOWS HIS ALLOWANCE, SHE IS THE ONE WHO GIVES IT TO HIM??? 😂

Theo insists he understands but manages to tattle on himself every single time Theo is a precious cinnamon roll who cannot lie even when he wants to 🥰

"Maybe. But you gave it to me. And that's the most important part of giving a gift." Sunshine would say, booping Theo on the nose and giving him a tight hug with a million kisses. "Cause the one who gives the gift gets all the thanks! Thank you, Bean!" HELP, SUNSHINE AND THEO ARE SO CUTE❤️

"Mhmm, he's a good kid."

"Yeah, the best. But I guess I'm gonna have to keep a closer eye on him to figure out what he's been selling to be able to afford 14k gold."  THAT IS THEO'S MOM AND DAD❤️

"I should start by double checking my secret marijuana plant under the bed to see if he's clipping that. Or the communal meth lab in the basement, I would hate for him to hurt himself down there. Janice does NOT clean her station even though we've all asked her to a thousand times." asdfdghjkl I can't stop giggling😂 Sunshine would be saying all that with a completely straight face until Logan turned around 😂❤️

I feel like Logan would definitely try to play it off and Sunshine would legit go around the table to look him in the eye and go like,

"You could've told me, you know?"

"You wouldn't have accepted it if it didn't come from Theo."

"Okay but to repeat, I know how much money he has. He has a jar he puts his savings into, and it's like twenty dollars."

"Okay but-"

"The jar is made of glass."

"Noted."

"But that was incredibly sweet of you."

"Yeah it's...it's nothing."

"It's not nothing. I'll wear it forever so, sorry I'm not giving it back."

[sarascamander]

Reading the cursed child (scorbus, norvelize version in a03). I read the script years ago when I was 11 (funfact it was the first harry potter book I've ever bought). So I'm rereading it again because I have a scorbus brainrot suddenly (11 y/o me shipped Scorpius and Rose so hard but now I grew up let just say my taste had change lmao).

List of thought gonna go longer as I read:

- yo Albus surly personality is basically me when I was 15 it was like looking into a mirror. Hold on there baby I understand you 😭

- I want to write a whole essay on Albus and Harry's relationship. They both are so precious but they just have a hard time with each other.

- Scorpius is the sunshine most sunshine cinnamon role ever. I would kill for him. I would die for him.

- ALL THOSE BULLY BETTER STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY OUTCASTS BABIES.

- “And be my good friend.” what if I die.

- why do people love to torture the cinnamon roll??? I want to hug Scorpio so bad like baby you deserve the moon and the sky and the world. And the fact that he's still trying to be so cheerful and optimistic. THE WORLD DOESN'T DESERVE HIM.

- Albus and Harry's father and son angst is killing me but it is also so delicious I relish in it (it's just so complicated I love it).

- "you’re kind, Scorpius. From the depths of your belly, to the tips of your fingers." Is the sweetest thing I've ever heard anyone said. I love this quote so much I want it tattooed on my forehead.

- Again, Scorpius deserve the fucking world.

- Scorpius and Draco's relationship is SO GOOD, SO PURE, SO SOFT. They love each other so much 😭

- brb I'm going to cry at the fact that Dark AU Ron and Hermione die in such a terrible way a few minutes after they finally confess their feelings (they were scared). 😭😭😭😭😭😭

- Snape is so dramatic. Girl "you're giving up your kingdom for Albus... All it takes is one person." he made it sound like they're in a romance fantasy novel (they are).

- Head empty. Scorpius happiest memory with Albus is strong enough for him to produce a patronus.

- Scorpius is once, again, a cutie pie that deserves everything.

- Delphi is more manipulative than I realized when I first read this lmao.

- GIRL the way Albus said that he and Scorpius ran away to start a new life in the muggle world as an excuse — what do you mean you're eloping at 14??? (Out of chronological order but I just remembered this)

- Delphi when I catch you —

- Never thought I'd be rooting for Draco and Harry duo yet here we are (did I say I love Draco as a dad?? I don't think he's appreciated enough. He's a brilliant dad! THIS is his best redemption arc).

- "What did you say to our son, Harry?" GO OFF QUEEN (Albus is a confirmed mommy boy)

- RON WANT TO MARRY HERMIONE AGAIN. I don't quite ship them in the book/movie but they're just the sweetest in here 😩😩

- I just had the sudden realisation that Scorbus might be the only couple that I ship in hp that is so close to canon (and was canonised by some play if I heard correctly).

- that time where they were in godric hollow and Scorpius was surprised that Albus never knew the full story of his grandparents or visited the place just bc he was being a petty, moody uninterested teenager hit so hard (he is me and I am him). And the shame he felt was real too. I always regret those years in my life where I acted like that and I don't even have a daddy issue like Al did, what's my bloody excuse lmao (I blame fucking hormones) 😩😭

- okay so finished it!! When I was a kid I don't quite like the time travel thingy and find it very confusing but I think it's because it's a screenplay yk, and it was meant to be watched not read. But the novel version did help a lot (and I give the author my hundreds of gratitude, her writing is absolutely beautiful! And she captured the characters perfectly! If you're scared to read The Cursed Child, read her novel version in ao3!!!).

I'm surprised that I actually love the plot more than I thought I would. Yeah it can get a bit unrealistic at times but all in all it's very entertaining and Albus and Scorpius are very well written, very rounded and nuanced characters that carry the book. I'm glad their parents didn't overshadow their personality etc (like them being mini-copies of Harry and Draco). They're their own person and I love that about them!!

They're not Drarry or even Jegulus as I've seen people say, they're in their own league. There are no enemies or hatred or tension between them; Scorpius and Albus genuinely like each other so much from the first they laid their eyes on each other and I adore them for it.

I read a theory that Albus was sent in Slytherin because he subconsciously wanted to be in a house with this kind boy met on the train and it made me want to cry (they were made for each other). (Although I do think Albus have many Slytherin traits, Scorpius I was less sure he screamed Hufflepuff/Ravenclaw to me but admittedly he can be cunning to).

So yeah, I don't think it's that bad as everyone said (and my 11 y/o self). It's fun and I actually cried a lot at the end of it (I have to watch Jily die, do you have any idea what that did to me???) (I don't even ship them but i swear this book set me to default back to canon).

I really want to watch the play, would die for it but it's impossible and I can only dream.xoxo

[janeyseymour]

La Cosa Nostra- pt 7

Cowritten with @schemmentis

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4. Part 5. Part 6.

Summary: It's a nice easy Saturday, and then you head to Church on Sunday- the Feds following you the entire time.

WC: 1.8k

Saturday rolls around, and your little ones are absolutely delighted to see both you and Melissa on your mother’s doorstep to pick them up.

“Mam! Mommy!” Cat shouts as she whips the door open. Rosie echoes her words as she all but launches herself at you.

“Hi, my little love,” you chuckle as you crouch down to be at eye level with her. “How was your night with Nan and Pop?”

“So good!” Rosie grins as you step further into the house. Melissa brings Cat to her own hip, delighted to be reunited with her girls once again.

“Pop let us have ice cream for dinner!” Cat giggles.

At that, you look at your father who is relaxing in his recliner. His eyes go wide, and they look everywhere but you.

“Dad,” you scold him.

“It was pistachio,” he shrugs. “That’s a fruit.”

“It’s a nut, and so are you,” you tell your father as you roll your eyes.

“Oi, Y/N,” your mother breathes from her place on the couch. “Let’s not forget the dozens of times your father let you and your siblings have ice cream for dinner.”

“That’s different! And you were always up in arms over it,” you say to your mother.

She shrugs. “You kids turned out okay, didn’t you? You own one of the most successful salons in the city, you have a beautiful wife, and absolutely precious twins. Besides, we’re grandparents now- we give the kids sugar and then send ‘em home with you.”

“What did you give them before we got here?” Melissa raises a brow.

Both of your parents just smirk.

“Cat, what did Nan and Pop give the two of you for breakfast?” the redhead asks slowly, cautiously.

“Cinnamon buns with ice cream!” Your oldest twin’s eyes sparkle with pure glee.

“Oh my god,” you mutter under your breath. You switch to your native tongue to tell your parents what you really think of this situation they’ve put you in.

“Oh lighten up,” your mam tells you. “Just take ‘em to the park and have ‘em run around there for a few hours. That’s what dad always did.”

“Damn right,” your father chuckles from his place.

So after bidding adieu to your parents, you and your family end up at the local park. Cat and Rosie spend the afternoon running around in circles, having you chase them, begging you to push them on the swings, giggling with all of the glee and innocence that five year olds should have. When more kids start to make their way into the little fenced area, you and your wife take a step back and find a park bench to sit on. Neither of your eyes leave your girls, but it’s nice to have a break when you’re both already exhausted enough. Even with last night, where you were both in bed by ten and sleeping in until much later than either of you had expected, the turn of events that your life has taken has the both of you still pretty much running on fumes.

“We are so lucky to have those little munchkins,” you sigh softly as you let your head rest on Melissa’s shoulder.

“We really are,” your wife smiles as she watches Rosie tag Cat.

The two of them have brought so much joy into your life. Your eyes glaze over as you’re taken back to so many of the big events that have happened in this park. You recall the day that the two of you simply came down here on a walk and the warmth of the sun as you held hands and strolled through the park. Melissa told you that she loved you that day. You remember this exact bench was where you felt your babies kick for the first time and the absolutely beaming smile that could light up the entirety of center city that your wife gave you as she felt it too. 

You’re taken back to the first time you brought your girls here at just a few months old- both you and your wife going stir crazy as you stayed inside and with the girls for the longest time. You brought your wife here the day that her restaurant opened, just to give her a sense of normalcy with all of the chaos that had taken place trying to get everything in order to open on time. 

You’re only brought back to the present when Rosie comes climbing into your lap and Cat climbs into Melissa’s. You both instinctively press kisses to your girls’ heads and sigh in content.

“All tuckered out?” you chuckle as the younger of your twins exhales deeply and her fingers run through your hair. You feel her nod, and you see Cat nod into Melissa’s neck.

“Can we go home and watch a movie?” Your eldest asks your wife quietly.

The two of you share a look before nodding. “That sounds like a great idea, sweetheart.”

As you’re getting the girls into the car and driving home, you miss the way that Agent Danik and Agent Shaw are tracking your every move.

The sleek, black, undercover car blends in well. You don't notice it trailing a few cars behind you. You don't notice it idling at the end of the street as you and your wife get your girls out of their car seats and safely inside your home.

You spend the evening curled on your couch. The twins splaying their tiny bodies haphazardly across both you and your wife's laps and slipping in the scant spaces between you as they start drifting to sleep. 

“Maybe we need to give them sugar more often.” You faux whisper to Melissa as you both leave the girls’ room after laying them down. “They didn't even ask for bedtime stories.”

“They get enough sugar between your parents and mine.” Melissa lightly hits your arm. “‘Sides, you'd miss bedtime stories after a while. You love doin’ the silly voices to make ‘em laugh.”

“Yeah,” You sigh. “You're right. I would.”

Normally, you and Melissa would return to your comfortable couch. At least for an hour or two to fully unwind before retiring for the night. Tonight, though, you both set wordlessly about your night time routine. You've caught up on sleep, for the most part. Still, there's a bit of extra exhaustion. Plus, tomorrow is Sunday, which means early morning to make Mass on time and breakfast with Barbara and Gerald afterward. 

You happily settle into your bed once you're ready for the night. Curled beneath your sheets, you hold a book open with one hand while your other arm is wrapped securely around your wife. The television in the room, with the volume low, playing one of her shows. 

You think Melissa has drifted to sleep already when you hear her voice. It's soft, and laced with her tiredness, but it’s clear. “It’ll pass, yeah? All this?”

You shut your book without worrying about your bookmark. Blindly, you set it to the nightstand. You lay down completely, wrapping both arms around your wife and kissing her cheek and shoulder. 

“It will.” You answer with all the confidence you have. “It’ll pass and everything’ll go back to how it’s ‘spose to be.”

The two of you get as much rest as possible given the circumstances. But then there’s a little hand on your face, and this time it’s Rosie who is gently prying your eye open with one of her own hands. You groan as you pull her onto the bed. You can hear Cat giggling as she does the exact same thing to your wife.

Your little one only continues to try to force your eyes open until you peel them open just enough to look at the clock on your bedside table.

“Rosalina Marie,” you groan. “Caterina Ann. It is 6:45, and we do not have to be awake for another forty-five minutes. Quit it.”

“Let Mam sleep,” Melissa sighs as she rolls out of bed. “Come on, you little rascals.”

She corrals them out of the room, letting you get another forty minutes of sleep before she’s coming back in to gently shake you awake.

“Mi amore,” your wife says softly as she stands by your bedside. She brushes away a few hairs from your face and kisses your temple gently. “It’s time to get up and start getting ready for church.”

You blink awake, happy to see that beautiful woman’s eyes sparkling. You roll out of bed unceremoniously before heading into the kitchen to eat breakfast and start attempting to get the twins ready for church in time.

 Rosie whines about the fact that Melissa has her in a dress while Cat spins around and giggles the entire time as she watches the skirt puff out.

“My love, it isn’t that bad,” you sigh as you pull on your own trousers. “Mommy just wants the two of you to look your best.”

“And you look wonderful,” Melissa tells Rosie as she slips on her own blouse.

“Why do you and Mam get to wear pants though?” your littler of the two grumbles.

“Because you only own leggings and jeans as a little girl, and Mam and I have slacks,” your wife explains.

By some miracle, the four of you end up in the sanctuary before the service starts. You slide into the pew where Barbara and Gerald Howard sit. The woman is immediately cooing over your two girls, and suddenly Rosie seems thrilled to be wearing the dress Melissa had put her in.

You hand the girls the silent fidget toys that you brought along in order to keep them quiet during the sermon.

“Do you want your book back?” Barbara asks quietly as the priest takes a few seconds to shift from a passage to the choir.

“No,” Melissa sighs. “Not yet. Just... hold onto it until I tell you I can get it back, and do not speak of it again. Please.”

Barbara raises a brow, but she doesn’t say anything further as she turns her attention back to the mass that is taking place.

After the service, you take Cat’s hand while Melissa takes Rosie’s, and the four of you head down to the diner that you frequent often after a service. Gerald and Barbara follow. Again, you fail to notice the way that Shaw and Danik follow your steps.

“Is that...?” Shaw asks.

“The senator, Gerald Howard,” Danik confirms quietly. “There’s no way that the senator has a hand in any of this.”

“No,” Shaw agrees softly. “And his wife is known for her activism in education and her devout Christianity.”

“Shit,” Danik mutters.

“Did we just hit a dead end?” Shaw asks.

The head of this investigation sighs. “I have no idea, Shaw. No fucking clue.”

TAGS: @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @thesamesweetie @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @gwennybriggs @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @sapphicxrat @a-queen-and-her-throne @sunsol-22 @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld

[alwaysxlarrie]

10 fav quotes from fics part 9 !!

it's a bit harder than i initially anticipated picking quotes for each post, especially when i've been compiling them for a year and i only do 10 quotes per post lol so big thank u to my bff @harruandlou for helping me w this one -- you're a gem n a half !!

“With, um, a small swirl of whipped cream,” Harry continues, desperate to stop talking, stop talking, oh my god, stop fucking talking. “Covered in um… a pinch of cinnamon?” -- @disgruntledkittenface

Louis smiles and oh. Oh that is not fucking fair. Because Harry is sat here hard and panting, Louis’s lips are glistening with spit because he’s just been sucking on Harry’s tits and his fingers are still massaging the head of his cock in a way that’s slowly turning him blind, and yet Louis’ smile scrunches his nose and creases his eyes and he looks absolutely, devastatingly adorable. — @zanniscaramouche

He does know. He knows what he is to Louis, and what he isn’t. He’s grateful for what he can get, and he’s in agony for all that he wishes he was. -- @loveislarryislove

Harry doesn't want to timidly look away again, as it only makes him seem more obvious, but he can’t not look away. Louis' gaze goes straight to his core, settles somewhere deep in his belly, and Harry really doesn't want to pop a boner in front of the entire class. -- @larrydoinglaundry

He’s been called a lot of compliments, many of them by Louis himself, but precious is a bit different, isn’t it? Softer, prettier, lovelier.-- @ohpleaselarry

Of course, Harry hadn’t worn any underwear. -- @suesheroll

Harry paused at the door for a moment and then spoke quietly, without turning around. “I’ve never worn a skirt before, sir.” -- @twopoppies

“Says the twink past his prime,” Louis rolled his eyes. -- @jaerie

He barely fought it, in fact, he might not have fought Louis’ alpha voice at all. He just basked in the way Louis’ eyes felt like they were burning his skin as he walked closer to him, his omega obeying as best as it could. -- @lululawrence

With another hand, Harry took a long sip of water, ice-cold shocking his mind back to the present. Calm down. Think about something else. Okay. Taxes, the weather, football, Louis, Louis's voice -- No, not Louis! -- @muldxr

[thefiery-phoenix]

YANDERE THOR HEADCANONS

Thor won't make it certain to ANYONE that he's a yandere at first. And heck, even HE won't have a clue that he's a yandere or not. He likes showing off a little when he's around you and putting impressive thunderstorms and challenging people to life the Mjolnir and that sort of thing to prove he's worthy for you. He's like a little puppy always wanting some form of attention from his beloved. He is clingy no doubt about that always wanting you to notice him and if you don't well... he's going to go around sulking and grumping and maybe causing thunder storms on poor unsuspecting people

He isn't shy for wanting affection from you that's for sure. When he wants something, he will get it. Thor's way of affection isn't that creepy or weird. People might think you're really good friends or something. He loves being close to you and always wants to be with you when you go for missions or something. And even if you're not an Avenger, he just likes being around you. Any sort of physical contact between you both like hugs and hand holding is more than okay for him, his heart will literally be leaping till the moon

He likes seeing you laugh but will get jealous if you direct your beautiful smile and laughs at other people instead of him. So, he'll always have some corny or cheesy dad jokes prepared mentally so he can make you laugh and feel good about it. Man here can be really creative about his jokes, they can range from hilarious ones to cheesy ones to dad jokes and puns and the most weirdest and bizarre jokes you've ever heard in your life. You'll love spending time with him since he makes you feel... warm and nice and also he makes you laugh

Now, he's really protective of the people he cares about and when it comes to you, he OVER protective. He'll always look out for you and will just wave his hand dismissively when you tell him you're more than capable of taking care of yourself. As strong and powerful as you may be, Thor here sees you as a gentle delicate precious flower that needs to be protected at all times. He'll first tell you to look carefully at the road while you're crossing and make sure you don't stay out till late in the night and stuff like that. Till he starts poking his nose into your personal life and matters

Despite his friendly nature and attitude, he ain't one to take shit from anyone, and when someone tries targeting you for something, he'll get pissed. He's one of the most powerful Avengers on the team and he isn't afraid to put his strength and his hammer to good use if someone decides to mess with you since your safety is of UTMOST importance to him

Thor isn't aggressive he just appears to be because of his height and intimidating personality but deep down he's a literal cinnamon roll and a cuddly bear. With issues that is

Loki may or may not tease him for his obsession of you from time to time just to get reactions from him

He'll take you to Asgard soon after his crush deepens even more and then he decides that he needs you to be with him and tell you you'll be the perfect king/ queen of Asgard with him. He will be incredibly sweet, caring and gentle towards you. He knows he can overpower you in literally less than a second but he prefers to tone down the aggression with you since he doesn't want you to be scared of him. His poor heart will shatter if you become scared or nervous around him. He is the literal incarnation of the devil when it comes to others and he isn't scared to get his hands dirty if anyone tries taking you away from him and he'll make that crystal clear. Anyone who even looks at you for a second longer will have his hammer at their neck and he doesn't care of they're a guy or girl

He will shower you with presents and gifts if you're good with him and he'll give you jewelry and things like that. He just wants some love and affection from you so please give it to him. He will give you whatever you ask for, books, music whatever it is. You ask, you get. In the blink of an eye

He won't like it too much if you hang out with Loki than him and he needs constant reassurance from you that you won't leave him or he'll get sad and grumpy. When it comes to punishments, he'll just hold you and ask you if what he's doing for you isn't good enough, if he isn't good enough for you. He's a damn good manipulator, that's for sure. He doesn't like yelling at you or raising his hands at you since that's no way to treat his beloved and he frowns upon any sort or form of violence if he has to deal with you when you're being bad. If you get on his nerves by yelling at him, he'll just lock you up in a room till you're ready to say sorry and calm down

As a yandere, Thor is pretty tame and gentle when it comes down to you. As long as you're by his side and tell him you love him, things will be better for you, him and everyone else around you

[angelic-dew]

Hi!! I don't mean to be a bother, but could I possibly request rengoku and tengen (without wives and separately done!) smut hcs please? I understand if you don't do it! stay healthy 🤍

# smut headcannons !

✧༉‧₊˚୨ 💌 ୧・author's note :: sure anon! I hope these are okay, I'm not the best smut writer qnq also! sorry for the huge delay, I've been lacking motivation lately. when I get tengen's part done, I'll update it here!

✧༉‧₊˚୨ 🍫 ୧・pairing :: Uzui T. x afab reader [not completed yet.] ⁞⁞ Kyojuro R. x afab reader — {you/your pronouns | separately done}

✧༉‧₊˚୨ ✖ ୧・trigger warnings :: mentions of female and male genitals. dirty talk. daddy kink. praise kink. size kink. biting. hickeys. slight mentions of rough sex. semi-public sex. fingering. raw dogging. spanking. ⁞⁞ 18+ content, children dni please. proofread.

𝐊𝐘𝐎𝐉𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐎𝐊𝐔.

꒰🔥꒱. I see Rengoku being into praising his precious lover in bed {consciously and subconsciously he does it}, he is a cinnamon roll after all, and a total sweetheart as a whole. Our beloved Umai King would also be extremely cautious with what he says; always taking into consideration your every action and signals with how you're feeling in bed. This time is precious to him and he takes it very seriously, always muttering phrases and short words of adoration and encouragement for your full enjoyment. Whispering ever so softly in your ear, always singing your praises to his heart's content.

꒰🔥꒱. Back in the Era Demon Slayer does take place in {1912-1926 || Taisho Era}, condoms did in fact exist, however, I believe Kyojuro prefers to go in fully raw for maximum pleasure as your walls tighten around him. That can translate to him wanting to prepare you a bit to take his entire length properly and with ease. He takes pride in prepping you, taking his time and lubing his fingers with some oil to make the process much easier.

꒰🔥꒱. He begins slow and gentle, soft to the touch; always treating you like some sort of dainty, delicate piece of porcelain throughout the process. Checking up on you at every moment as lewd cries of contentment escape from underneath your lips.

꒰🔥꒱. The flame Hashira does have a somewhat "rowdy" side to him. The thought of being able to do the deed with someone he loves ever so much really gets the blood flowing, to certain areas of course. So even though he's such a gentle sweetheart, he can still be rough in some subtle ways at times.

꒰🔥꒱. These can include bite marks along your body — hickeys and even light bruises peppering your breasts and neck; a few sprinkled along your collarbone area as well, as a finishing touch. It depends on what exactly is being done, but, he does tend to leave a few playful bite marks along your inner thigh area while giving you oral.

꒰🔥꒱. Because, let's face it, you know he's eating you out like there is no tomorrow. Rengoku is the Umai King after all, it's no surprise he can take that same talent of eating sweet potatoes and do the same to you, instead this time, he's eating out something that's definitely better than any food. He would ultimately prefer to give oral rather than receive, your needs come before his, always!

꒰🔥꒱. Rengoku is definitely an ass guy, don't try changing my mind. I see him loving to hold it within his palms gently, something about it just feels so enthralling that he can't even begin to come to his correct senses when he sees you in doggy style. That alone will make him pounce on you with little to no hesitation. Regardless of the size as well, he doesn't really care how big it is, once there's enough for him to grip and drool over as he pleases, it'll be a true treasure.

꒰🔥꒱. Kyojuro seems like the type to have a liking towards things smaller than him, so those rules will definitely apply to his lover as well. Especially if you're a bit shorter than the average person, bonus points to you right there, it only makes his size kink worsen each time. He simply adores the fact you're so tiny compared to him, yet so strong and able to take each, individual inch of his meaty cock every time; it makes him feel a sense of endearment per se. His little person's ability to feel all of him, honestly, makes him melt for you.

꒰🔥꒱. An alternative take on his size kink would also be a size kink, but you're bigger than him. He would have just as much adoration and love for you even if you were taller than him in just height alone. The cream of the crop that really gets him going has to be when he actually enters your warm hole. He practically dotes at the sight of your expressions as you tremble under his soft, loving touch. Despite your size difference, you're still extremely tight and sensitive to the touch — the Hashira is indeed fond of that.

꒰🔥꒱. He would most likely have a huge daddy kink as well. Of course, he wouldn't exactly mention it upfront, he would be a bit embarrassed to do so. I don't think he knows he has one until you call him it while he's ramming himself into one time. When you called him that, it almost made him feel a sense of power, but moreover, if he were to be frank, he could've felt himself get harder inside you from that word alone. Rengoku would definitely want you to say it more often; I firmly believe he would even imply it in his words as well while whispering sweet nothings into your ear.

꒰🔥꒱. Sex position-wise, I see him having a preference for wanting to have a view of your angelic face while also being able to please you to the fullest, of course, there are a few exceptions like doggy style, but here's some in line with his preferred liking. So, mating press, missionary, cowgirl {reverse cowgirl at certain times}, g-whiz and the seashell, to name a few. Ideally, Kyojuro would like to do it in a place of privacy so he can focus on you and you primarily, always putting your needs first. However, if there ever came a time when you wanted him urgently, he wouldn't hesitate to take a risk. Whether that be behind a large building or a bathroom stall for a brief moment to have a quickie.

꒰🔥꒱. As I stated directly before, he has a particular fondness for ass, specifically yours, rather than anything else. So out of impulse he would spank you or leave slight bruising along your waistline as he holds onto you.

꒰🔥꒱. He doesn't spank you hard, it's usually a simple small slap, but from the moment you start asking/begging for more, just keep in mind, his normal sweet demeanour will change to something otherworldly; trust me, he will not hesitate to give you what you want by any means. Whether that being you want him to be rougher, harder or even leave more marks on you, he will make sure you're satisfied down to the last touch.

© yandere-smoothie :: please don't re-claim or translate my works without permission! <3

[patchwork-crow-writes]

The RalsAlmanac, Volume I

Okay, here it is! A series of essays that will attempt to definitively explain just who or what Ralsei is, referring to scenes from the game as evidence, as well as external sources where appropriate.

There will be some conjecture, as there's just so much we don't know about him, and what little we are given isn't exactly the most revealing. However, I've done my best to cleave as closely to the source material as I can, and I believe there's a strong case to be had here.

Hopefully you'll be able to see where my points come from, or at the very least you'll learn something you didn't know before. Either way, thanks for your consideration!

Volume I - Ralsei Is A Character In A Role-Playing Game.

Self-indulgent reference out of the way, lemme ask you a question.

Who is Ralsei?

It's a question that seems like it should be easy to answer. He's the Prince From The Dark, the third of the three Delta Warriors, he exists to serve the lightners, and is the most precious little cinnamon roll that ever lived. He enjoys baking and crochet, can hold a tune, is a decent interior-decorator, and holds his friends Kris and Susie in very high regard.

Thing is, that's about all you can really say about him without veering into speculation and headcanons, and they're more surface-level observations than anything else. What exactly does "Prince From The Dark" mean, for instance? Prince in what sense, exactly? Ceremonial, or with the actual power that royalty conveys? Where does he rank in comparison to, say, King or Queen, both actual rulers of actual kingdoms? The title of "prince" would suggest that he answers to them, but while they rule their own municipalities, Ralsei's title implies he rules over ALL dark worlds. You could go on asking these questions forever, but I think you see what I'm getting at.

A more productive avenue of questioning might be: What role does Ralsei play in the story of Deltarune? Perhaps more of his underlying character and motivation could be gleaned by looking at what he does for the story and the game. And this would be correct... sort of.

We tend to think of him as the squishy healer of the party, the Heart and moral centre of the Fun Gang. And he absolutely is that, but he's also quite a bit more. He plays all sorts of different roles and character archetypes in the first two chapters of the game, including but not limited to:

the old man whose purpose is to wax poetic about the ancient prophecy...

the know-it-all tutorial fairy who walks you through the basic game mechanics...

the straight-man DM trying to keep everything on the rails...

the young sheltered noble experiencing the outside world for the first time...

the demure love-interest to the main protagonist...

the Polyanna determined to see the good in everybody...

the mysterious waif who knows things he shouldn't...

...eye candy…?

...and so on and so forth.

And so what, I hear you cry. Characters in video games can have more than one personality trait, after all. And yes, this is true! But usually, the different aspects of a character's roles, how they interact with, reinforce or contradict each other, can tell us more about their inner world - what motivates them, what they actively like and dislike... in short, it grants them depth and allows us to engage with them as actual people, rather than just a series of game functions and character traits dressed up in a pretty bow.

But that's not what we see with Ralsei. In fact, far from showing us any real, deep aspect of his character, each new guise he dons and part he plays in the narrative further obfuscates him from us. We learn no new meaningful information from any of these exchanges... except for one thing, but we'll come to that in a moment.

This vexes us, because we WANT to know more about him, but all we end up getting is stock JRPG tropes dressed up in a warm, fluffy coat. There HAS to be something deeper, we reason - he's hiding things from us, so he must be a secret villain. Or his backstory is so tragic, so traumatising, that he cannot properly articulate it to us right now. Or maybe what we see really IS what we get - a simpering, airheaded fool whose only desires in life are to be cute, please his betters and do what he's told. Yet even this explanation seems... unsatisfying, especially since we KNOW he harbours some angst about himself and his sense of identity.

And speaking of which, that one thing we learn? Right at the end of Chapter 2's Acid Tunnel sequence, he utters a single sentence:

This is arguably one of the most significant lines of dialogue in the entire game up to this point. But what does it mean, exactly? I believe most people assume it means he doesn't have a clear sense of who he is outside of his ordained purpose, which is certainly valid, and definitely something I believed for a long time. And yet, this explanation does not deepen our understanding of his character in any meaningful way; looking back over all his interactions with the cast, it does not allow us to glean any further information about him.

And you can say that's because he himself doesn't know what he's like... but again, this doesn't actually change anything, and we just end up with a circular logic trap. We don't know anything because he doesn't tell us anything, and he doesn't tell us anything because he doesn't know anything, so how can we be expected to know anything, except that no-one seems to know anything about him… which is very frustrating to us Ralsei scholars, and gets us no closer to truly understanding him.

But look at what he says again. Really look at it. It’s a very strange way of saying “I don’t really know who I am”, isn’t it? After all, if that’s what he means, then why doesn’t he just say that? I’m certain you’ve realised by now, but it’s because that’s NOT what he’s saying at all. He literally has no clue what being “himself” is supposed to be, because he wasn’t even created with a sense of “Ralsei-ness” in the first place. Little wonder, then, that we can’t discern anything about his internal world, when there is nothing there to be discerned.

But before I elaborate any further, I want to talk about a couple of scenes in Deltarune that are just... puzzling. This is relevant, I promise. The first is during the dialogue with Rouxls Kaard before the rematch with K.Round. Ralsei says something interesting in the lead-up to the fight:

Note Susie’s baffled reaction to this. Then not long afterwards, he continues with:

Throwaway joke, right? We laugh because Susie's right - K. Round and its crown do look exactly the same to us, and so Ralsei's dramatic utterances are deflated and lose their impact. We laugh, beat the boss with Susie's help and forget all about it. But here's the thing - if K.Round looks the same to us, and it looks the same to Susie, and presumably by extension the rest of the in-game characters... when why exactly does Ralsei take the time to insist otherwise?

Is he... lying? Our most precious little boy, guilty of perjury? Say it ain't so! :O

The second scene is in chapter 2 - Queen has challenged us to a game of Punch-Out on her absurdly tall arcade machine, and we can talk to the characters before trying to interact with it. Talk to Ralsei, and if you answer "Gaming is my life" to his prompt, he says this:

Most people don't even come across this in their playthrough, so I wouldn't be surprised if it's new to you reading this. But again, note this strange discrepancy between what Ralsei reports is happening and what Susie says is actually happening. It becomes apparent to most people that Kris can affect the tone of their voice when saying what we tell them to, which affects how the response is taken by other characters and gives us a subtle clue about how they actually feel about certain characters or situations.

Are we to assume, then, that Ralsei isn't actually listening to how Kris says things, but only what they're saying? And if that's correct, then... what does that say about him?

Taken at face-value, within the context of the game, neither of these events really make much sense. It just looks like Ralsei is being overly-dramatic, or lying, or perhaps even insensitive to what their friend is trying to tell him, which doesn't quite track with his per-established shallow traits of kind, all-loving and moralistic. It's perplexing and seemingly out-of-character for him. So it might help to consider, in each of these scenarios, who exactly Ralsei is talking to.

Is it Kris and/or Susie? This would make the most sense, but it's actually not that likely, considering the aforementioned discrepencies between his descriptions and Susie's observations. So is it himself? Again, if he can see things the same as everyone else in-game, that wouldn't make much sense, because then he's just saying stuff that... isn't true? Or in the latter example's case, just completely ignoring what Kris is saying, which doesn't seem to entirely gel with what we know about him.

So, who does that leave? Well, the only other person - or should I say entity - who is present for both of those scenes is... us. The player of Deltarune. And that might seem even stranger than the previous options, until you realise what it is he's actually doing - providing flavour text, additional exposition informing us of details that we wouldn't - or shouldn't - be able to make out on a pixelated display with no voice-acting, attempting to give us a richer sense of these events in order to increase our sense of immersion in the game and world of Deltarune. In effect, he's playing the part of a character in a role playing game, doling out “flavour text” that contradicts another character’s experience of the same scenes, and he's doing it entirely for OUR benefit. Not Kris’s, not Susie's – ours.

He tells us that K.Round's crown is different, and that it is in pain from its forced control, to try and increase the stakes of the fight, and to give us a motivation that's not "here's the exact same boss again lul". He responds to Kris's words the way he does, not because he doesn't understand the nuances of their tone, but to try and amp us up for the upcoming challenge, and to validate our choice when we select the dialogue option "Gaming is my life". Because we cannot hear Kris's tone of voice - and Ralsei knows that. To him, Kris's tone literally doesn't matter, because he doesn't believe it matters to us in that exact moment.

And here’s the thing: if not for Susie’s asides immediately contradicting him, we’d likely take what he says here as what’s actually going on. To Ralsei, the reality he and his friends experience is not important – it’s the image of that reality that he’s trying to convey to the player. It’s like he knows he’s part of a game, meant just for us to experience and enjoy, as opposed to a real world filled with real people having real experiences.

And the reason I brought this up is to illustrate what I believe Ralsei to actually be - namely, that he a walking, talking, singing and dancing amalgam of stock JRPG characters and tropes that's trying very hard to present as an actual person, to the point of knowing absolutely nothing about who he even is outside of that. Put in even blunter terms, he's literally a fluffy goat-shaped vehicle to set the player on their journey through the game, to keep them playing and to keep them invested. People looking for deeper aspects of his character come up short and are disappointed because they're looking for something that does not currently exist.

And just so that I'm clear, I do not mean that Ralsei is "acting", or that he's "wearing a mask", because that would imply that there was actually something underneath his "facade" to begin with. No, this is who the Prince of the Dark is - a very convincing fascimile of a person, following his directive to ensure that the story of Deltarune is resolved, and that the game of Deltarune is played to completion. And once you realise that, a lot of things that Ralsei says and does that seemed strange before suddenly make a lot more sense.

As for the why... well, that'll have to wait for another time. But hopefully you can begin to see how my future essays in this series all tie in to this one, because I think you can only really understand those with the framework that this text provides. I hope that my reasoning made sense and wasn't too difficult to follow, but I'll be happy to provide additional information, clarification, or even just discussion on any aspect of this essay... even if we just wind up (respectfully) agreeing to disagree. Would love to hear what people thought about this!

Thanks for reading!