#he’s a good husband his just also very Vulcan about it
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Brain supplied me with the image of Sarek in full Vulcan Ambassador gear in like a CVS buying tampons and wine with all the intensity and concentration of diffusing a bomb and the poor clerk that has to ask for his id and I cannot stop laughing
#the elf talks#star trek#he’s a good husband his just also very Vulcan about it#tbh just the image of him in ful Vulcan robes in a cvs is funny enough but I know he was there comparing different tampon brands for A While#as he should onto the best for Amanda
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Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.
#as a note do NOT read the comments on any T'Pol marriage clips on youtube they're full of 'haha women amiright' jokes about#how she's leading Trip on and being a bitch for not choosing him etc - if you become interested in female characters you learn#quickly just how much people still hate women displaying any amount of complexity/doing anything that isn't just falling into a man's arms#even if that hatred doesn't take the form of outright vitriol (aka: 'I feel so sad for Trip bc T'Pol's marrying some other guy')#Trip: T'Pol listen this arranged marriage stuff is no good - you've gotta be free! You have to do what YOU want to do!#T'Pol: -legally seen as property of her husband in the eyes of the law- ...............#<- not dunking on Trip it's just funny how easy it makes it seem - but!! He doesn't know all the facts#as evidenced by him saying T'Pol might 'call off the wedding' to her mother - T'Pol can't legally call off shit#It's also interesting how gender isn't really mentioned in any of the clips I've seen - it's very clear to me that T'Pol has no options#specifically because she's a WOMAN within her culture but that's almost like a quiet undercurrent and not focused on as a main#point of dissatisfaction - which I imagine it 1000% would be for Vulcan women when men have infinitely more freedom#Vulcan Man: I don't wanna marry this lady#Vulcan Law: Ok#Vulcan Woman: I don't wanna marry this guy#Vulcan Law: Noted. So - if you and your lover are willing to risk his life there's a chance (if he wins) that you can get out of marrying#him BUT if your husband kills your lover and still wants to marry you you DOOO have to marry him sorry you just gotta#<- this also makes it incredibly dangerous to in any way warn your legal husband that a kal-if-fee might be incoming#the element of surprise is a HUGE advantage when it comes to winning a fight to the death (which your lover can train for)#Vulcans#T'Pol#T'Pring#star trek#I don't think this is bad necessarily (as a fictional worldbuilding thing) but I wish it were explored more#It's especially interesting because it's an aspect of logical Vulcan society - it's clearly not logical but it's also clearly rooted deeply#in tradition which may mean Vulcan long ago used to have a much more extreme gender bias towards the male population#it just implies a lot that Vulcan has these old laws which are unfair towards women yet they still follow BUT women are treated as equal#citizens OUTSIDE of marriage! Maybe there was a feminist movement before? Is there another brewing? Where are the Vulcan feminists!
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I was thinking about how Spock is intentionally paralleled with Sydney Carton from A Tale of Two Cities in The Wrath of Khan, and now I am unwell!
At the beginning of the movie, Spock famously gives Kirk A Tale of Two Cities as a birthday present. This book was specifically included for its themes of sacrifice and resurrection, which obviously mirror Spock’s decision to give up his life to save the crew. Notably, Kirk’s final lines reference the famous closing of the novel.
Kirk: It is a far, far better thing I do than I have ever done before... a far better resting in place I go to than I have ever known...
Carol: is that a poem?
Kirk: Something Spock was trying to tell me. On my birthday.
So what’s the importance of this line? The famous “far better thing” quote is from the book’s ending when Carton has just sacrificed himself for his beloved Lucie, giving himself up to be executed in place of her husband so that she may find happiness. (Live long and prosper, anyone?)
Interestingly, both Spock and Carton are emotionally repressed characters, and anguish over the depth of their love for the people who uniquely see them for who they are — in this case, Jim and Lucie. While I’d argue that Spock is more at peace with himself and his feelings for Jim after the events of the first movie, the point still stands that Jim is the one to truly understand him in a world that labels him as a cold and calculating being.
I believe that this is what Kirk’s line calling Spock’s soul “the most human I have ever encountered,” is supposed to represent. (Even though I agree with the criticism that it could have been worded better!) Similarly, Lucie is the one to recognize Carton’s inner nature in spite of his aloof facade, begging “I would ask you to believe that [Carton] has a heart he very, very seldom reveals, and that there are deep wounds in it.” (Book 2, Chapter 20.)
When Carton finally admits his love to Lucie, it’s hard not to see the resemblance to Spock’s dilemma in the first movie. You know, that time when Spock, in his heartbreak over something related to Jim (that were not given an explanation for), cries out “Jim! Good-bye my . . . my t’hy’la. This is the last time I will permit myself to think of you or even your name again!” before attempting to purge himself of all feelings in an ancient ritual, and failing because the Vulcan priestess can totally sense that he’s still thinking about Kirk. (Yup, that totally straight time!)
Well, Carton is in a similarly agonizing predicament, because he can’t get his feelings for Lucie to go away. He tells her, “I break down before the knowledge of what I want to say to you” and “I have had the weakness, and have still the weakness, to wish you to know with what a sudden mastery you kindled me, heap of ashes that I am, into fire—a fire, however, inseparable in its nature from myself, quickening nothing, lighting nothing, doing no service, idly burning away.” (Book 2, Chapter 13)
He also expresses that he could never separate his love for her from himself, saying that “Within myself, I shall always be, towards you, what I am now.” (Book 2, Chapter 13) Yeah, I know the fact this mirrors Spock’s famous “I have been and always shall be yours” is probably a coincidence, but I’ll be damned if I don’t mention it.
Finally, Carton expresses his love for her in his willingness to sacrifice himself for her sake: “For you, and for any dear to you, I would do anything. If my career were of that better kind that there was any opportunity or capacity of sacrifice in it, I would embrace any sacrifice for you and for those dear to you… there is a man who would give his life, to keep a life you love beside you!” (Book 2, Chapter 13.) Of course, Carton’s story ends when he sacrifices himself for her, fulfilling this promise. Hmm, now who else does that sound like?
This is definitely not a perfect parallel: Spock doesn’t start out as a lazy alcoholic, although there is an argument to be made that Carton’s low self-worth reflects Spock’s before he went on his conversion therapy fueled journey of self discovery. Additionally, I wouldn’t say that Spock’s love for Kirk is unrequited like Carton’s for Lucie, (as evidenced by many things, but I’ll primarily point to the events of The Motion Picture and The Search for Spock), but you could potentially cast Carol in the role of Darnay, Lucie’s husband.
The most important thing to glean from this is that Spock was very deliberately set up to be the Carton figure, which is interesting given that Carton’s actions are driven by his willingness to do anything to see his beloved be happy and prosper.
#spirk#k/s#the premise#kirk/spock#my post#the wrath of khan#star trek ii: the wrath of khan#star trek the wrath of khan#star trek: the original series#star trek tos#meta#analysis#I have been and always shall be yours#t’hy’la#star trek the motion picture#star trek the motion picture novelization#star trek tmp#james t kirk#tos spock#s’chn t’gai spock#a tale of two cities
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Star Trek II: Wrath Of Khan thoughts:
For this post if I could simply embed the entire movie and just write the word, ‘queer’ I would. Unfortunately you are all stuck with this, happy pride month!
Spoilers for the entire movie will be featured in this post
Going forth:
- I know what the kobayashi maru is so I know they’re not in danger but that’s some good acting Bones
- “‘Physician heal thyself.’” “Is that all you’ve got to say? What about my performance?” “I’m not a drama critic.” Thinking about this pose thinking about this pose thinking about thi-
- “Galloping around the cosmos is a game for the young, Doctor.” He’s feeling something and projecting
- “Aren’t you dead?” That’s certainly a way to greet your husband
- They’re so cute. And sad. And cute.
- tiny guys hehe. The boots got sluttier somehow
- McCoy got him glasses cause he can’t read the book without it and bring up that post that’s saying how Spock and McCoy’s gifts go together but McCoy got the logical thing and Spock got the emotional one
- Don’t quote me on this but the things I would do to that man… I wouldn’t.. but holy shit that outfit is killing me.
- hi checkov
- Carol Marcus? Doesn’t she have Kirk’s-? okay then I won’t spoil that just yet
- Creature in a jar moving under the sand
- BOTANY BAY????? Oh wait a sec I should’ve seen that coming it’s called wrath of khan
- Did they kill Chekov?
- hello Khan. That’s a very long and dramatic reveal he’s kinda hot tho
- Thinking about genetic engineering and augmentation and how they’re illegal but star trek presents cases where people now exist and it’s not the fault of the person that they are what they are so they have to question if an entire person should be illegal because of the actions of others… anyway I don’t wanna get deep into this right now, back to the movie
- Are they going to kill Chekov? (edit: not sure why I’m so fixated on thinking they’re gonna)
- WOW THAT IS CERTAINLY A SWEAT DROP
- brain worms… this sounds recently familiar
- HES READING HIS BOOK WITH THE GLASSES THEY DIDNT NEED TO SHOW HIM DOING THAT BUT THEY DID AND ITS ADORABLE OMG
- The conversation between Savik and Spock is so precious. And it’s in Vulcan. And she says “He’s more human than I expected” and it’s like that’s her commenting on Spock’s husband
- Kirk does not want to do this inspection
- McCoy does a little bounce
- “For everything there is a first time. Wouldn’t you agree, admiral” “mmhhmm” “Would you like a tranquilizer?” *Kirk shakes his head*
- I think this one has a more solid plot. I’m enjoying so far :)
- Does McCoy serve on this ship or is he just following along?
- (Had to stop watching around here because I left for the weekend so these thoughts are potentially a bit different)
- wowah! Cool ship!
- uh oh. Chekov on the monitor with the brain worm!
- khan is kinda- yeahh
- I LOVE SAAVIK! RAHHH! Also apparently Saavik is canonically half Vulcan half Romulan according to the trivia
- I like how Bones is just there :)
- Putting Spock in black… they knew what they were doing
- They’re husbands your honour. Spock knows Kirk wants to take command and isn’t to proud to get in the way of making his wife happy
- “You are my superior officer. You are also my friend. I have been and always shall be yours.” Kissing would have been less romantic
- George Takei’s voice is majestic
- “He tasks me. He tasks me and I shall have him. I’ll chase him round the moons of Nibia and round the Antares maelstrom and round perdition’s flames before I give him up.” Not obsessive at all.. nope this is something completely and totally normal to say about your nemesis
- “Uhura, have Doctor McCoy join us (Kirk and Spock) in my quarters.” Hmmmmm.. gotta inform the whole polycule about the shady government experiment
- lmao BOTH Spock and McCoy know who Carol Marcus is
- oh so terraforming… NEVERMIND REALLY FAST TERRAFORMING
- “Really, Dr. McCoy, you must learn to govern your passions. They will be your undoing.” Flirting, gentlemen?
- How and why does Starfleet continually put Spock and McCoy together? Like this alert would be sent out 24/7
- Spock and his awesome daughter Saavik
- falling
- Kirk with the breast flap down
- such a good moment… such a great moment (sorry for shitty photos)
- Kirk has to put on his little glasses <3
- Kirk does NOT fuck around
- Poor Scotty. He’s got so much emotion about his dead crew mate and the doctor apologizing to him 🥺🥺🥺
- Saavik making up rules to make sure the admiral is safe. Love her.
- “Jim, be careful.” “We will.” MCCOY IS SO BITTER. Like ‘no wishes of luck for me, Spock? Fuck you!’
- The collar on that uniform is silly
- hehe McCoy got scared by a rat. OH HE ALSO GOT SCARED BY A DEAD BODY
- Kirk’s little disappointed “oh my god” as he finds Chekov in the cupboard
- “Suppose they went nowhere.” “Then this’ll be your big chance to get away from it all.” McCoy’s not leaving Kirk, but he still looks like he wants to strangle him sometimes
- Kirk not afraid to punch a bitch
- WAIT THATS KIRKS SON?!? Isn’t it?? I thought David was Carol’s brother. But nope!
- aww dammnit I knew they were still mind controlled :/
- Saavik saving David. Y’know it would be pretty cool if there was something about Saavik, David, and Johanna meeting and maybe serving on a ship of their own.. idk just thoughts.
- ewwww brain worm.
- OH THE ECHOING “KHANNN”
- mmmm Kirk without the jacket. The white turtleneck with sleeves… also McCoy and Saavik are slaying with their turquoise and orange turtlenecks
- “Food the first order of survival.” I bet the fanfic writers had a field day with this one (cause cause it’s a reference to Tarsus IV)
- Imagine this: you’re stuck underground with your husband, your other husbands adopted daughter, your ex, her son (who’s also your son), and your old Russian navigator who’s unconscious and tried to kill you while being mind controlled by a worm which came out of his ear
- David’s got Kirk’s curls <333
- Kirk has a thing for people who look good in blue. Change my damn mind.
- “I don’t believe in a no win scenario.” He immediately calls Spock afterwards cause he’ll never lose with his husbands around
- “You lied.” “I exaggerated.” Yep, he IS that bitch
- Saavik is learning so much from them
- They still just.. let anyone onto the bridge. Like David is just there now
- oh no Scotty! Well McCoy was miraculously there to catch him
- CHEKOV BACK ON THE BRIDGE!
- Once again. Kirk does not fuck around! He just killed those guys
- “To the last I will grapple with thee.” WOW. Okay. Well.
- Khan’s about to terraform this bitch
- McCoy stopping Spock from going into the chamber..
- “You’re not going in there!” “Perhaps you’re right. What is Mr. Scott’s condition?” SIKE BITCH SPOCK JUST FUCKING NERVE PINCHED HIM. McCoy you should’ve been tipped off by the fact he 1. Said you were right and 2. Gave up trying to self sacrifice so easily
- wait why’d Spock connect to McCoy’s psi points and say remember? Remember what?
- I like there’s just a sign that flashes the word ‘radiation’ in red letters
- McCoy and Scotty BEGGING Spock not to do this. Break my fucking heart why don’t you?
- Kirk’s little run to the engine room <3
- I know he’s dying but those boots are so slutty
- Solely watching Kirk’s face is already like watching 10 puppies get killed
- “Don’t grieve, admiral.” Has me crying already. Your closest and longest friend is watching your slow descent into death and you ask him not to grieve you. You want him to know your death meant something. It meant he’d be safe and that is nothing to grieve. I’m going to be sick
- don’t touch me I’m thinking about this
- SAAVIK IS CRYING OMG GIRL ME TOO
- Kirk’s voice breaking.. god. Shatter my fucking heart why don’t you?
- if they play bagpipes at my funeral I’m rising from the dead (violins would be nice though)
- NOO HIS CUTE LITTLE GLASSES BROKE
- “They’re just words.” “But good words. That’s where ideas begin. Maybe you should listen to them.” POP OFF DAVID ! Good line
- SON REVEAL! NOT CLICKBAIT
- There’s 8 minutes left of this. Did they leave this one with Spock dead?
- “He’s really not dead, as long as we remember him.” Good words McCoy. But perhaps maybe you might have some.. assistance remembering him?
- got distracted and drew Kirk but I love the last little Spock narration. Really brave to end a WHOLE MOVIE with one of the best most well known characters being dead
Well that movie did have its pros and… khans
…
See you next time
Masterpost
#star trek#star trek ii: the wrath of khan#the wrath of khan#captain james kirk#james t kirk#khan noonien singh#leonard bones mccoy#doctor mccoy#spock#s'chn t'gai spock#carol marcus#saavik#pavel chekov#hikaru sulu#montgomery scott#I’m sorry but I don’t think I mention Uhura in this one
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about the "snw can't do vulcans" take
One thing I've seen over and over said in the reactions to the sdcc 2024 clip is that "SNW doesn't know how to write vulcans/has a very bioessentialist take on vulcans".... And that *specifically* Henry Alonso Myers cannot write vulcans (even though we have no idea who wrote the clip episode, afaik, i might have missed it, my bad if so). Which I find completely baffling. Every vulcan in SNW has been wildly different than any other background vulcan we have seen in the entire run of the series.
(For one, they aren't giving every vulcan a logical bowlcut. Every other series pretty much insists their haircut is mandated by Surak or something -- even the visual language around them is different. Even though both T'pau and T'pring have interesting hair in TOS, as does amanda, who lives the vulcan way. i digress. i just love vulcans displaying personal expression). But yeah, what vulcans do we see in SNW? I'm gonna skip over spock because people have very strong opinions over 60 years about what makes a good spock characterization that has nothing to do with characterizing vulcans in general. First, T'Pring. Huge improvement in what we see in TOS. She isn't coldhearted. She loves spock. She gets annoyed by her mom and has struggles of her own. She is kickass at her job. She can match Spock in getting out of hijinks with logical thinking. She is smart and pragmatic. She wears beautiful clothes and is interested in building a strong relationship, and is willing to engage in human culture. We also have T'pring's mom. She is on the other end of the spectrum. She is very into traditional values even when it will make her angry and illogical. She is into proper appearances and doesn't go in for indulgence. She is a bit cruel, too, not just because of her prejudices to spock, but to her daughter and her husband. Then we have T'Prings dad. What a joy of a character. He is nothing like a stereotypical vulcan. He wants to try new things. He is fascinated by tastes and experiences. In many ways, though, he embodies IDIC and compassion much better. He also has a childish joy to him. We also have a V'tosh Katur prisoner in Spock Amok. He is extremely prejudiced of spock -- showing that dislike of humans isn't a prejudice linked to the teachings of Surak, but something orthogonal to that. He is extremely punchable and gets punched. its great. We have a background character that works with T'pring. She is there for a brief scene, but i loved that they resisted the temptation to put her in a "vulcan haircut" and gave her something distinct. We have Sybok, who is dating a non-binary pirate. I love that for him, great addition to his character.
There is Vice Admiral Pasalk, in Una's trial, which Spock hates from his time working with his dad. He is a stickler for the law, but also a vindictive MF, willing to punish Batel despite her doing her job to the best of her abilities despite her personal reservations. There is a Vulcan judge on the panel, who *is* willing to judge in Una's favor, proving that all vulcans aren't voting/thinking in lockstep when adjudicating law, as well. Finally, there is the Vulcan who rejected Chapel's application and then tries to get her back when he hears she met the Kevorkhians -- this vulcan does have the traditional vulcan hairstyle, lol. He is probably the most stereotypically vulcan of the bunch. But yeah... I'm not sure where people are getting that SNW writes/depicts cookie-cutter biologically race determined vulcans when it has written more different types of vulcans than any series other than Enterprise (and that was over the course of 4 seasons...). and I will note most of these vulcans are in episodes Henry Alonso Myers wrote. (although as one of the showrunners along with Akiva Goldsman, they are involved in all the episodes to some capacity). Maybe because they don't like how it characterizes Spock in particular? But Spock is not all Vulcans. Spock is Spock. And I don't even mean it because spock is half-vulcan. I mean it because Spock is one of the most famous characters in the western canon. Everyone has opinions on spock. That has nothing to do with how the show treats Vulcans as a whole. Not to mention the huge amount of things they have sprinkled in about Vulcan culture from all the shows and things they elaborate on, including lots of references to kalifee, the use of telepathy to show connection between family members, sensory differences in smell, temperature, taste, etc, descriptions of their prison system based on rehabilitation, courtship rituals, etc. There have been more interesting takes on mind melds than i have seen on any star trek show. They repeatedly emphasize that Vulcans have strong emotions and what they need to do to control it.
Anyway -- this is why I'm not gonna assume the writers of SNW suddenly got amnesia and forgot everything they knew about Vulcans based on a 5 minute clip. (as with everything, i'll caveat, i could be wrong, and its a bad episode --- but just because it is a bad episode it doesn't invalidate everything they did with vulcans so far. have i mentioned i want to adopt tpring's dad?). ------------
Non-vulcan specific opinions i've also seen and don't want to make a separate post of: Couldn't they use surgery instead of this serum?: I don't know! neither do you, because we haven't seen the episode. I wonder if wherever they are going on mission requires a more thorough camouflage. Or maybe it has something to do with the research Chapel has been doing since s1 e1. I'm very intrigued as to what they possibly could be doing with a lirpa on a mission. Ok but why does snw have so many genetic modification plotlines: Because that is a question SNW has chosen to engage in in a sci-fi manner, through characters like La'an, Chapel, and Una. like it is one of the big recurring themes in the story -- is all genetic therapy doomed to eugenic applications? Is genetic therapy desirable? what things will it be used for? Are the answers we considered 60 years ago the same as they are today, with the advent of CRISPR and adult stem cell treatments? That the serum represents what vulcans are "really like": We don't know why they are in communication with the kerkhovians, who have previously been shown to be uncaring and bureaucratically inflexible aliens. Why are we assuming their serum is what "biological vulcans" really are like, when we know they screwed it up with 1. how long it lasts and 2. with whether it would work on a lanthanite. And previously they screwed up in assuming spock would want to be fully human, and that spock being spock was a mistake. (they are explicitly shown as bad/intransigent aliens in Charades. they aren't neutral helpful aliens, they are unreliable narrators in that way). That newbie Vulcans should just be Romulans: Well, no, Romulans *also* have their own culture, just because it is not the teachings of Surak doesn't mean Romulans also don't have their own inflexible codes of honor, duty, etc that *they* have adopted in order to regulate their society, which are more similar than different from Vulcans. Romulans aren't pre-reform Vulcans. I'm not even sure there is such a thing as "one type" of pre-reform Vulcan. We've never seen pre-reform Vulcans. Surak didn't emerge in a vacuum. Lots to explore here, and would love to explore the implications after seeing the episode. Why is racism against spock genetic: maybe their literalness/pedanticness/lack of a filter is something that comes more naturally. Romulans do have a sect built entirely around Radical Candor, and Vulcans famously "do not lie." Maybe overcoming being overly literal when its not charitable is part of the lesson they learn/struggle with. Also, there are plenty of biological reasons one might suddenly lack a filter/not be thinking clearly/acting out of character that could come with the serum.
There was something else I meant to be doing instead of this. (sleeping, maybe?).... But im just bursting with so much speculation from the clip. My brain has just been spinning with theories.
#snw#star trek#st: snw#star trek strange new worlds#strange new worlds#star trek: strange new worlds#vulcan meta#vulcans
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can you tell us all abt the cassini crew??
Thanks for the question! I don't have a whole lot of 'story' for them per se, I just rotate them in my mind, lol.
Basically, the Cassini is a starfleet exploration ship! Their main job is farting around on the edge of documented space a la the Enterprise and they generally have very little support or direction from head brass.
Overview of the crew under the cut:
Captain Dirk Kelly: A kind of carefree person on the surface, but she struggles with making deep emotional connections (especially romantic) because she spent her early career working on non-FTL ships and thus has lost a lot of time. She is very protective of the crew though! And a lesbian fuckboy, but we don't hold that against her.
First Officer Commander Liolram Avut, head of communications: Dirk's partner in crime (mostly pranks). She cultivates an impression of being the straight man to Dirk's shenanigans, but she's really just better at not being caught. Probably has the highest emotional intelligence of the whole crew.
Lieutenant T'kaal, head of science: A vulcan woman who used star fleet to run away from her parents. She's managed to be the kind of strict with her subordinates that makes them feel like she expects a lot from them and they love her for it. She is married and bonded to Harry Crawford.
Lieutenant Olivier "Nol" Balliol, pilot: A rougeish pilot with a heart of gold. He makes friends easily and is a major romantic for his husband, Adil. He's also besties with Wiz, since they share a console on alpha shift.
Lieutenant Jr. Grade Howell "Wiz" Larson, navigator: Wiz is an android! They don't worry too much about being more 'human', but they do sometimes worry their lack of expressiveness hampers their ability to connect with others. They love wordplay, especially calling themself a philosopher, because they are in love with Sophia.
Dr. Minah Hirschfeld, head medical officer: Frighteningly competent and also just intimidating if a crew member does something stupid and discovers a new allergy. She's friends with T'kaal, and they often eat together and kvetch. When she was younger, she had a lot of guys chasing her, but she fell for Jochem, her husband, almost instantly.
Nurse Adil Balliol: Adil has a more gentle bedside manner than Dr. Hirschfeld (unless you're Nol, in which case he masks his worry with annoyance) and carries himself with a deep confidence. He hates anyone or anything that gets in the way of his job. He joined starfleet when Nol proposed to him during a supplies run, figuring it was his best bet for leaving the colony where he was living. Now he's also very much in love and it was his idea to have a vow renewal ceremony.
Lieutenant Jr. Grade Harry Crawford, botany department: Harry loves plants and his wife SO much. He's also simultaneously a chill person and consumed with anxiety and generally wears his heart on his sleeve.
Lieutenant Jr. Grade Jochem Hirschfeld, engineering: Jochem is a pretty simple guy and is mostly here because of his wife's post; if she were working on a station, he'd be just has happy there. He's also a bit of an airhead, especially when it comes anything not in engineering.
Lieutenant Jr. Grade M'turs, security: One of the two Caitians on board, along with her brother Hserr. She often accompanies science teams as a bodygaurd, and gets on well with T'kaal.
Ensign Sophia 'Fi' Gilmartin, security: One of the newest members of the crew since she joined starfleet after several years working as a human 'companion' - a job that is a kind of combination bodyguard/medic/ambassador. She also has a deep interest in engineering, partially to help Wiz with their upkeep, so she shadows Jochem a lot.
Ensign Hserr, biology department: M'turs' brother and Adil's friend. He also often works on away teams and looks up to T'kaal. He's less talkative than his sister, but generally good-natured. He also has an interest in ancient earth martial arts.
Ensign Kat Wynn, engineering: A gossip and a prankster, which can come off as childish or insensitive at times. She doesn't mean it though!
Ensign Sathia Zh’thyar, communications: An Andorian who was raised in a human colony and Kat's best friend.
There's also the folks not in the crew but closely related to them like T'kaal's vulcan friends T'me and Nava who ended up adopting Kier and Kai after the Cassini found them, as well as their (eventual) children - Lucien Crawford and Melrose Hirschfeld, who both partially grew up on the Cassini.
I do have a couple of stories in the works, but it'll likely be a while before any of them are completed:
Harry and T'kaal getting together. It involves a lot of guts, gore, and chocolate. (plus shorts from the rest of their lives like Luci's birth and Harry's death)
T'kaal and M'turs finding the twins and their adoption by T'me and Nava
Grown up Luci ends up in the mirrorverse bc it's star trek I'm legally obligated and also it's fun
The romcom of Dirk deciding she has to 'get Wiz and Fi together' bc they OBVIOUSLY have crushes. When they have been dating for years at this point
Fi has to save Wiz by disassembling them and hoofing it
Maybe the lead up to Nol and Adil's vow renewal...
#updates#oh man there's a lot of them now huh#star trek au#i am... not tagging them all. executive decision.#lore
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Tuvok:
Ok, first off: real world standards, he's not normal passing. Apart from the ears, he's just too autistic (sorry, "Vulcan" 🙄) to be considered "normal looking". He went to 1990s earth once and Did Not Pass as normal. But in universe, he would on the surface seem like a model Vulcan. And he is, kinda. But he's also so gd weird. (/aff)
Not even gonna get into how badly he wants to be Will Graham because obviously that's there too but we don't have all day. Anyway.
Obvs the emotions struggle is real as it is for any Vulcan worth paying attention to, if only because they were all only ever written by humans.
But also, tangential to him being Will Graham coded (but still separate enough) he is a total mind slut. You know how some characters will go "when I have a problem, I set it on fire" or shit like that? When Tuvok has a problem, he mind melds with it. Homoerotically if it's an option. Dude even got a mind std one time, despite the fact that's not even a thing.
And then whatever the fuck kinda thing he has going on with Janeway. Not even necessarily in a shippy way ("not romantic, not platonic, so devoted the lines blur") but like... not only is he unreasonably loyal to her but he does shit like not only letting her touch him whenever she wants but *deliberately offering her HIS HAND to hold* to comfort her when she needs it (reminder that hand touching is very intimate to Vulcans and can be likened to human kissing) and again, they're never even stated as romantic or anything, they're just friends and yet he is more loyal to her than he is to his own code of ethics.
Obviously part of all of it could be because Janeway (or possibly Kate Mulgrew) is simply Like That, she does do shit like tell her platonic subordinate "then be a good rat and find us the cheese" in a tone that makes me lose it, but it's not all her, Tuvok is also extremely not normal about it. I should submit Janeway too actually, I'll do her next.
Also, afaik Tuvok is the only crew member of Voyager (who makes it back) who had a romantic partner before the ship got lost in the Delta quadrant and remained loyal the entire seven years they were lost. I *think* Samantha Wildman also did but she's a minor character (so she could've been getting it off screen) and she started out pregnant so once born Naomi both kept her busy and was a living reminder of her husband's love. So in that regard, Tuvok is very much not normal but like in the most positive way. He literally didn't cheat on his wife even when his life was in danger (they *were* out there for seven years so of course he hit pon farr eventually) and I think that's really cool of him. But also very not normal.
I'm very tired rn but once the polls come out, simply check out the blog of Bea @bumblingbabooshka (wanna clarify, I'm not him but he is THE Tuvok blogger in my opinion) who has written much on this already.
There's also the whole stuff that happened around his monestary era but I'm not even at that part yet but it must've been wild.
Anyway. Vote Tuvok
Janeway:
- will literally martyr herself at the drop of a hat
- will kill you if she thinks it's what she needs to do for her crew
- will not kill you if she thinks you've got residue humanity after decades as a borg drone even though realistically she really should've (tho ofc we're all glad she didn't)
- will violate your personal rights if she thinks you're not "human" enough and also compare you to a replicator (yes I'm still salty about that. wait what was the question? right, i'll get back on track)
- will say absolutely deranged shit like "then be a good rat and find us the cheese" in the a tone that makes me lose my mind and basically give everyone a crush on her (and also mommy issues) if they spend too long in her vicinity, leading to a very loyal crew
- her solution to having a crush on a fictional character was to delete his wife (very relatable but also very not normal)
- she wanted to watch hot Q on Q sex (possibly for scientific reasons) and looked very disappointed when it was severely underwhelming
- WHO brings a bathtub on a spaceship???
- there's more but y'know
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Death
This post was brought upon by the death of our pastor at church. I don't even know if I'll be able to voice out all my thoughts here about death that I've been thinking for the past couple of days. Probably not.
I'll be the first to say that I do not have the closest relationship with him and I am personally not close to our church and its members. I myself have different beliefs regarding some core beliefs of Christianity and the bible. I think that's why I'm quite surprised myself that his death affected me this much.
He was a good man. I was not close to him but since my mother is very active member of our church, I am familiar with him and his family.
His death was so sudden. Based on the stories I've heard, he went to the church alone to setup a newly bought speaker. Some kids outside then saw him fall and immediately informed some adults of the situation. Someone then on the nearby vulcanizing shop called an ambulance to bring him to the hospital but was pronounced dead on arrival. From what I've heard, the cause of death was head trauma, most likely coming from his fall.
We went to his wake last Saturday. I was not able to hold back my tears when her sister came and broke down in tears.
I guess this just further proves my belief that when it's your time to go, it's time. I've heard from his wife that she initially advised him not to go since setting up the speaker is not urgent, but he still went. Who knows what could've been if our pastor was there with his wife?
But I guess having what ifs in these kinds of scenarios are meaningless. When death comes for you, no is not an answer.
I think a big reason why his passing affected me this much is that for at least about 15 years, he has been at least a constant part of my routine. Going to church weekly, seeing him. He was full of life. Kinda like how Kobe Bryant's death affected me, but this was to a much closer scale because I knew this person and this person knew me. To see someone full of life gone in an instant gives you a surreal, weird feeling.
It made me realize too how much immediate family members must be strong in these times. I couldn't imagine how his wife and daughter felt upon receiving the call that their husband and father was that. The amount of mental fortitude not to break down and go insane at that moment must be immense. Maybe they did break down at that moment, and I won't blame them one bit.
It also got me thinking how tough it is to deal with the aftermath. This hits much closer to home for me since like Gethsie, pastor's daughter, I am an only child. To deal with the aftermath like processing the documents, preparing the wake and burial, and dealing with all the people visiting must be truly difficult. Having to grieve on one hand and having the strength to manage those things in another must take a huge toll on them. I guess their faith in God truly helps them, or as a matter of fact it is the only thing keeping them together now.
It got me asking too, "What would be the better way to die? To die slowly of an illness so that your loved ones can prepare themselves or to go out quickly to save yourself from the suffering?" I don't have the answer right now and I don't even know how I would want my parents to go. It's quite morbid to think about it but for me personally, it's one of those things that I have to emotionally and mentally prepare when that time comes. And I know for a fact that no amount of preparation could prepare me for that.
Pastor's internment would be this upcoming Wednesday, which I would not be able to attend since I'm here at Manila for work.
For all the disagreements I have with the church, I could attest that he was a man of faith. Figuratively and literally offered his life for the church and his beliefs.
He embodied what it truly meant to serve Christ.
Rest in peace, Pastor Hector.
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So I’ve been meaning to get around to this literally forever but I’ve had so much going on and tumblr tends to be a bit of a nightmare scrolling very long posts BUT I finally read this and it was delightful :D
Extended thoughts under the cut so not everyone has to listen to me waffle, lol
-I was grinding my teeth that whole job interview scene. Jason was not missing out. At least where I’m from the questions that lady asked would not have to be answered and aside from being shitty are also just unprofessional as hell? You’re not missing out buddy don’t worry
-Loved the ASL bit (Leo absolutely would turn his hearing aids off to ignore someone that’s annoying him I’m cackling)
I’m now stupidly fond of the thought that even if they do eventually have/adopt a child Leo forever jokingly calls the roomba their firstborn
-“I’m cooking again? Man, I’m both the housewife and the breadwinner. What are you?” Sorry Jason but he’s got a point (this bit made me laugh out loud)
-Always obsessed with Jason just. Calling himself Valdez at every opportunity. He’s completely enamored with being able to call himself that and everything it represents (letting go of his own shitty mom! Connecting to Leo and getting to brag about the fact that they’re married at every opportunity! Having a connection to the mom Leo loved so much who Jason never got to meet!) and he’d never shut up about it
-I loved Leo and Jason taking turns comforting each other. Just in general it being balanced. I feel like Leo gets a lot of comfort (which is great! The boy needs hugs) but Jason usually tends to be taken at his facade of needing to keep it together and so rarely gets held in return which makes me sad, so while I’m not glad he had such a hard time (whose idea was it to have him hold a class on that particular topic, yikes), I’m glad he at least got to be held about it. I just adore mutual hurt/comfort stuff to no end
-Leo and Thalia having what seems like a running joke of her casually pulling knives on him is such menace behavior lmao. Love that for them, they would
-“You really are the best Husband ever.” “I can’t be,” Jason said, “You exist.” -> I’ll just be over there melting into a puddle in case anyone needs me 🥺
-Also their little wedding conversation. Leo being overwhelmed and overstimulated and Jason just being there. I’m <333
-Did not like the glitch situation! Am intrigued but may be happier pretending it never happened because I do like this just being the soft good ending that it (mostly) is
-Not the students knowing they can derail the lesson by making Jason waffle about his husband for half of it, I’m dying
-Penny seems fun! I like the thought of Leo having an apprentice. Out of curiosity: is she a Hephaestus/Vulcan kid?
Festus being curled around Leo like a kid is a lovely image I’m obsessed
-The conclusion is so so lovely. No everything is not magically okay because they’re together. Yes they’re happy but things aren’t always good. And they don’t have to be. They’re both doing the most they can. Still doing meaningful things and changing the world in little ways even if they’re not saving it themselves anymore. I have a variety of thoughts about this but mostly it’s just a really lovely sentiment
-Would love more info on Penny! And I do think extended Grace family sounds like a super interesting concept (maybe they’re a mixed bag where Jason decides some of them he’d rather have in his life than others and that’s something he kind of struggles with because he’s used to feeling like he has to do right by everyone including people he doesn’t like?)
Guys… it’s finally here.
After almost three months of working on it, my largest fic ever is finally finished- currently clocking in at around 15k words!!
This is a collection of short stories about “Domestic life with Leo and Jason” and the beautiful things that come out of that- I give this as my gift to the Valgrace community as a reminder that happy endings can happen, just sometimes we have to create them ourselves.
CW: Swearing, brief talk of homophobia, a little bit of angst sprinkled in for good measure.
Word count: 15,580!!
“Violets and Marigolds”
Married Valgrace AU
Jason sat on the warehouse roof, watching the sun rise. His legs dangled off the side. He felt something brush gently against his ankle, and he saw the sole of Leo’s scuffed-up brown Doc Marten work-boot knock a little against his sneaker in the soft swing of Leo’s legs. The pale golden light of dawn glinted on the windows below them. Jason looked up and smiled at Leo.
Sure, insomnia’s a bitch. But Jason didn’t care when the man he loved was sitting next to him and smiling. He knew that he could get through the sleepless nights and he knew that dawn will always come after, no matter what. Whatever happens, the sun will rise. And Leo would be next to him.
They would always have each other.
Jason interlaced his fingers with Leo’s. It was a new day. He didn’t know what it would bring. But he knew he could count on seeing Leo’s face at the end of it, and the start of the next one.
Jason sat down in front of the interviewer.
“Jason Valdez.”
“That’s my name.”
She squinted at the paper and then studied him, “You don’t look like someone whose last name would be something like Valdez.”
Jason stifled a grumble. He hated when people pointed that out. Why couldn’t they keep their nose out of it?
“…Not that it’s any of your business,” Jason said, as calmly and respectfully as he could, “But I took my husband’s last name when I got married.” To emphasise his point, he casually put his hands on the desk in front of him so that his wedding ring was in full view. It was made of a special alloy of both imperial gold and celestial bronze, and carved with intricate designs. Jason loved to show it off.
The interviewer looked at Jason over the top of her thick-framed glasses, “Why?”
“Well…” Jason really didn’t like this woman, but he had to be professional. He decided blunt honesty was the best tactic to shut her up, “I didn’t have the best relationship with my mother. And I’d rather her name wasn’t a part of my identity. My husband, though, I love very much, and I want a piece of him to be with me. Now this job-“
“So, your husband…” The interviewer continued, “Is he any relation to Leo Valdez, the Greek demigod who launched a missile attack on New Rome?”
“You mean the Greek demigod that sacrificed his life to stop Gaea and save the world? Yes, that’s him,” Jason was getting properly annoyed. This was an interview for a job, not a dating profile. She didn’t need to know what went on in his private life.
“But he did launch the attack?”
“He. Was. Possessed.” Jason growled, “By an eidolon. Working for Gaea. He was not in control of his actions. Plus, that was fourteen years ago. Plus, some of Camp Jupiter’s top Praetors themselves saw to it that he was pardoned. His name is cleared, meaning my name is cleared. Now, can we talk about my credentials?”
“I didn’t get the job!” Jason said, dropping his bag by the door and throwing himself onto the couch.
“Oh no!” Leo said, looking up from where he was sitting, cross-legged on the carpet, a collection of sketches and blueprints spread out in front of him.
Jason waved his hand, dismissively, “It’s fine. I didn’t want it anyway. The interviewer gave me a bad vibe.” Jason didn’t mention that Leo’s name had come up in the interview- or that that was the reason why he hadn’t landed the job. It wasn’t Leo’s fault. They knew that living in New Rome might cause some problems, but it was the only decent place to find demigod work, and it wasn’t like Jason was gonna stop being married to Leo.
“How was your day?”
Leo turned back to the mess before him, and started shuffling papers around. “I got a few new commissions in,” He said, “A design for a carseat that massages you. Washing machines with legs. That kinda thing,” He turned back around, “Plus your standard swords, shields, the odd axe. Nothing new there. I’ll head down to the warehouse tomorrow and start working on those.”
“Don’t overwork yourself, amorsito.”
“I’ve had to take on a few extra stuff while you’ve been looking at jobs,” Leo said, “I’m the breadwinner in this household. We gotta pay bills somehow.”
As he talked, he began to fiddle with his hearing aid (He’d needed them ever since the explosion). Jason knew that he only did that when he was really agitated. He switched to ASL.
“Don’t play with that,” Jason signed.
“Sorry,” Leo signed back. He left the device alone and started fidgeting with his wedding ring- twisting it round and round, swapping it between fingers, spinning it on the table. Jason could tell something was wrong.
“What’s up?” He said in English.
“It’s nothing,” Leo replied.
“Querido…” Jason chided, “What is it?”
“It’s nothing… it’s-it’s silly, really. It’s not worth mentioning.”
Jason sat back on the sofa with his arms crossed, a patient expression on his face.
“Okay, fine! It’s just… something you said yesterday kinda… is still on my mind.”
Jason leaned forward, “What did I say, mi estrella?”
“You said… you know how we were talking about you getting a job? And how you wanted to make money to settle down for the future? Like- what did you mean by that, because it seemed like you meant…”
Leo trailed off, not making eye contact with Jason. He bounced his leg up and down so hard that the coffee table next to him was buzzing. He kept on passing his wedding ring between one hand and the other. He reached up to touch his ear again, but then he caught himself and quickly brought his hand down. He kept fidgeting with the ring.
“Do you… do you want kids, Jason?”
Jason was kind of taken aback by the bluntness of the question. He hadn’t meant to broach the whole subject of children to Leo. Not yet. But he’d been lying if he said the answer was anything other than yes, “Well… yeah, eventually. I mean, not right now, obviously, but someday. I’ve always imagined myself as a dad. And with Percy and Annabeth having their baby, and Nico and Will announcing that they’re Trying, it kinda got my head spinning a bit.”
Leo didn’t respond. His eyes were fixed on a spot on the wall in front of him. His leg was jiggling violently now.
“Why? Do you… not want kids?” Jason asked, a little scared to hear the answer.
“I don’t- I don’t know. I mean, I’ve never really seen myself as a dad. I’ve always thought I’d just have my machines. I guess… you don’t think the Roomba is enough, do you?”
Jason shook his head, “No, cariño… I don’t think a Roomba equates to having a child…”
“Why can’t we just be the cool gay uncles? Someone’s gotta do that now that Nico and Will are becoming parents.”
“We can do that, if you want,” Jason said, “But wouldn’t it be so cool to make our family bigger? I get it if you don’t want to bring a child into this world, but we could always adopt- don’t you want to give some poor kid a chance to have the home that you never got?”
There were ways for two male demigods to have biological kids- divine conception and all that. It took a lot of praying and sacrificing to the Gods, but if you were on their good side they’d allow it. That was the route Nico and Will had chosen. It wouldn’t be hard to get their approval- Hera definitely owed them one.
“But we’re demigods,” Leo said, “Life is dangerous for us. I don’t wanna put an innocent kid in harm’s way by inviting it into our lives.”
“I get that,” Jason said, “I really do. But we’re safe in New Rome. Lots of demigods raise families here.”
“I don’t know, Jason…”
“Okay. That’s fine. You don’t have to know everything right now.”
“But… but what if it turns out we want different things? What if I realise, years from now, that “actually no, I definitely don’t want kids” and you realise that “actually yeah, I really do” and then you divorce me for some girl named Tiffany, who has a really weird laugh like a cross between a hyena and a pig but she’s got this really fertile oven and she gives you triplets and I’m left to die alone, only talking to my machines and slowly going crazy? Huh, Jason? What then?”
Jason thought about that for a moment, “But that’s the thing- I don’t want to have kids with Tiffany. The only person I’d ever want to raise a child with is you, mi cielo. That’s who I want on my team. If you don’t want to, then I don’t want to either.”
“So… you’re not gonna leave me for Tiffany?”
“Listen to me, Leo, mi vida.” Jason grabbed Leo’s hand, and Leo’s leg stopped bouncing so much, “Tiffany’s not real. You made her up. And if she was, she sounds like a real bitch. No one compares to you.”
Leo nodded, “Thanks… I-I needed to hear that.”
“Come on,” Jason said, “I’m hungry. Let’s have dinner.”
“I’m cooking again? Man, I’m both the housewife and the breadwinner. What are you?”
The next few interviews were a bust. Eventually, Jason applied for a job as a Roman History professor at NRU.
He shifted in his seat as the interviewer scanned him up and down.
“Wow, I mean… you’re the Jason Grace!” She exclaimed.
“Jason Valdez, actually. I got married.”
“But still… You’re well known across all of New Rome. You slew the Trojan Sea-monster! You toppled the black throne of Kronos and slew the Titan Krios with your bare hands at fifteen! You played a pivotal role in the Second Giant War and helped to defeat Gaea! And again, fought to take down the Triumvirate. You’re an absolute legend!” She looked down at Jason’s resumé, “I don’t even need this. If you want the job, it’s yours.”
“I’d like to be given a fair chance, just like the rest.”
“Noble as ever,” She said, awestruck. She tapped the paper, “Well, this is still impeccable. Top grades at New Rome University. Praetor of the first legion. Pontifex Maximus. Twenty-four years of service in the Fifth Cohort. You’re fluent in Latin, Spanish, Ancient Greek, and American Sign Language. Glowing references from multiple gods. Yeah. You’re hired.”
“Really? Are you sure?”
“I mean, standard interview questions, yadda yadda yadda- why do you want the job?”
“Umm��� well, I’d love to teach. I love being a role model, and supporting young people. And I love Roman History. My husband always jokes about me becoming a Professor.”
“Well you certainly are a role model,” The interviewer said, “Kids look up to you and the rest of the Seven from the Prophecy. You’re heroes to them. It would honestly be a privilege to have you as part of our faculty, and really help the students feel like they can achieve things.”
“That’s… that’s great to hear.”
The interviewer grinned, and stretched out her hand for Jason to shake, “Term starts in September. Welcome to the team.”
“Gah!”
The yelp woke Jason up. He stirred, and saw Leo sitting up in bed, hugging his arms to his chest, drenched in sweat and shivering.
“Leo…?” Jason grumbled. He sat up, and wrapped his arms around Leo’s shoulders. Leo drew in a shaky breath. “What is it?” He made sure to whisper it close to Leo’s good ear, since Leo had taken off his hearing aid before bed.
“N-Nothing… bad dream… go back to sleep.”
Jason moved his arms so that he was now gripping Leo’s shoulders, gently but firmly.
“Mi alma, you’re shaking.”
“…It’s cold.”
“You’re basically a human radiator, Leo. You don’t get cold,” Leo’s skin was hotter than usual, which was saying something. It felt like a toaster that had just been switched off.
Leo stopped digging his nails into his arms and held his hands out in front of him, as if making sure they were really there.
“Did you have another flashback?” Jason asked.
“I… I…”
“The night you died?”
Leo nodded, his breathing was still choked and choppy.
“It’s okay, Leo. You’re alive. You’re here. You’re safe. And I love you, mi vida, mi preciosa vida.”
“I’m… I’m alive,” Leo repeated. He looked again at his hands, studying the lines on his palms, “I’m alive.”
Jason moved again, this time hugging Leo’s middle, squeezing it tightly. Leo let out a sob.
Leo put a hand over his heart, like he needed to remind himself that it was still beating. He closed his eyes, and let out a long breath. He seemed to compose himself a little.
“It’s okay…” Jason whispered, although he wasn’t sure Leo could hear him without his hearing aid- he was completely deaf in his right ear, and had chronic tinnitus in his left, a small side-effect of blowing up.
Leo’s breathing was still irregular and shaky, but Jason could feel his heart slow, and his temperature cool down.
“Leo?” Jason asked, after a while.
“Hmm?”
“Is it me, or… are the night terrors… getting worse?”
Leo hesitated, then nodded. “It’s happening most nights, now. I can usually sleep through them, but…”
“Is it just that night, or…”
“No, mi sol. It’s other stuff. Trauma is trauma-ing.”
Jason unwrapped his arms from Leo’s waist and shuffled forwards, so they were sitting side-by-side, cross-legged on the bed.
“Talk to me, bello.”
Leo looked at Jason in that sad way Jason had come to know. It broke his heart a little every time he saw the pain in Leo’s eyes.
“It’s… it’s hard, mi estrella. My life did end that day. And while I’m so, so happy that I got it back… it’s hard to process what happened. That’s what I think the dreams are for- my brain trying to process it all. But… it’s hard. Because, for a moment, the blood lay still in my veins. My heart stopped beating. It’s hard to imagine busy old me lying dead, but…”
“You haven’t slowed down since then,” Jason observed, “And you never did before that. Your whole life- both of them- you’ve spent them constantly moving, never staying still. If you didn’t even stop in death, then when will you?”
Leo sighed, and fidgeted with the fabric of the bedsheets.
“I think your body is telling you it’s time to rest, amor mio,” Jason told him, “You’ve worked so hard. You deserve a break.”
Leo’s shoulders began to shake with another round of silent tears. He buried his face in Jason’s neck, and Jason wrapped his arms around his body. He had to admit, seeing Leo like this scared him. He was one of the strongest, bravest people he knew- to see him reduced to shaking tears, clawing at invisible scars, weeping, curled in Jason’s arms…
Some horrors in this cruel world were too much to handle. And Jason wasn’t sure how much help his comfort actually gave. He was helpless to fight those inner demons for Leo.
So much for “Respected Roman Warrior”, Jason thought, So much for all the medals, all those titles, all that honour.
The person he loved was sobbing into his chest, and Jason was powerless to stop it. All he could do was stroke Leo’s hair, and tell him everything would be alright. He should be doing more- fighting monsters, killing something- but some monsters you just can’t fight. All Jason could do was hold him.
“… Jason?” Leo whimpered, after a while.
“Yes, mi luna?”
“Are you… are you gonna leave me one day?”
Jason cupped Leo’s face in his strong, calloused hands, holding his everything out in front of him on the bed. He rolled forwards on his knees to kiss his forehead.
“I made a vow, remember?” He whispered, “I stood up in front of all our friends and family, in front of several gods and goddesses, and I promised to be yours forever. And you did the same. Do you remember that?”
Leo looked down so that his nose dug into the heel of Jason’s outstretched hands. “I remember. I know we did, but-”
“Hey! Hey- look at me-“ Jason tilted Leo’s head up, so his brown eyes sparkled in the low light of the street-lamps outside, “Have I ever broken a promise?”
“No…”
“There, then it’s settled. I vowed to love you ‘til I die, and I vowed to keep loving you beyond that. Come what may. And I am nothing if not a man of my word. And I know you are too.”
“I am,” Leo agreed, “I really do love you, Jason.”
“I love you too, amour mio.”
Leo still shivered from the fright of the nightmare. Jason held him close, until Leo eventually began to snore. Jason stayed awake, watching Leo breathe, watching his face twitch as he dreamt, his eyes moving under his lids. They stayed like that until the sun rose.
Another sleepless night- but they were still together at the end of it.
September came, and with it Jason’s first day at work.
Jason unlocked the door to his office and walked inside. It was a small rectangular room- nothing special. But the plaque on the front of his desk read Prof. J. Valdez, embossed in imperial gold lettering. Jason smiled at it.
He walked over to his computer monitor and sat down. He took out his briefcase, and began setting items down on the desk. It took him a while to arrange everything in a way that he wanted, but once he was done he stood back and admired his handiwork.
The framed photo of him and Leo on their wedding day, Leo blushing bright red when Jason had kissed him. The little trinkets Leo had made him over the years. A miniature Festus (deactivated). A Rubik’s cube that shuffled and solved itself periodically. Metal flowers in metal flower pots that actually bloomed whenever Jason walked into the room, and closed up when he left. More pictures of them and their friends. Jason and Leo with Piper hanging out at Camp Half-Blood. Double-dates with Nico and Will in New Rome. All of them with Percy and Annabeth’s new baby taken just after they’d brought her home from the hospital. Jason loved all these things. He loved that he could keep them on his desk, to remind everyone that came into his office that he was in love with Leo Valdez.
Just for good measure, he hung a few more photographs of Leo on the walls, and more little handmade creations on his shelves. He couldn’t help it- Leo always made him around seventy thousand little gadgets every Christmas, birthdays, and random Tuesdays. Their apartment was already filled to bursting with these affectionate little gifts. Did Jason really need fifty new forks? Not necessarily, but they were beautifully crafted and he loved them. His pockets were filled with Leo’s little gizmos, all lovingly made and thoughtfully designed. He wouldn’t trade it for the world.
He got to his lecture hall early, and began setting up, plugging in his laptop and pulling up the powerpoint. He’d created a little “get to know me” slide that new teachers often made- complete with yet more pictures of Leo.
He sat down at his desk and sighed.
Jason studied the tattoo on his arm. SPQR stamped on the skin and twenty-four lines all beneath an eagle symbol. That was nothing new. But fresher ink glistened. Next to the eagle, in iridescent gold was a hammer. Surrounding the symbols, also in gold, were three thinly-drawn concentric circles. Other couples chose different designs, but Jason had wanted this one. The hammer, the symbol of Vulcan, showed his union with Leo, and the merging of their families. If they ever had kids, they would also have those symbols, as they would be a legacy of both Hephaestus and Jupiter. The rings around the symbols represented years of marriage. Leo had a similar tattoo- his hammer in the standard black and his eagle in gold encircled in a thick black ring before the thinner gold ones to show that he married into the legion. The tattoo, of course, had been Leo’s idea.
Students began to drip in.
“Is this Roman History with Professor Valdez?” A student asked.
Jason must have grinned a little too hard, because the kid looked a little freaked out.
“Yes. Yes it is.”
He couldn’t help it. It was one of his favourite things ever, to hear his new name. Sometimes, when he was alone, he’d just say it to himself, over and over “Jason Valdez, Jason Valdez, Jason Valdez, Jason Valdez.” Even after he’d been married to Leo for three years, he never got tired of it. And oh! To hear others say it too made him elated beyond description. That’s one of the reasons why he loved the idea of becoming a teacher. He’d get to be referred to as “Professor Valdez” every day. He’d never get used to it in the best way possible.
Once everyone had settled into their seats, he stood up.
“Hello, everybody! My name is Professor Valdez, and I will be your Roman History teacher for most of your time here.”
“LEONIDAS JAVIER VALDEZ!”
“Uh oh,” Leo muttered. “What is it, amorsito??” He called in a sing-song voice from the other room.
“DON’T YOU AMORSITO ME!! COME HERE!”
Jason knew Leo would be reluctant to move, “Are you sure, mi luna? Can’t you come out here and tell me?”
“COME. HERE.”
Jason heard groaning, and Leo appeared in the door.
“Jason Sebastian Valdez,” Leo said, leaning against the doorframe, trying to act as causal and innocent as possible, “What’s up, amor mio?”
“What the fuck is this???” Jason roared.
He gestured to the room. Every inch of every surface- the bed, the floor, the side tables, the windowsill, the top of the wardrobe- was covered with bits of machinery. Copper wiring, bronze plates, circuit boards, pipes, pistons, batteries, scrap metal, plywood, spanners, screwdrivers, discs, spheres, et cetera, et cetera, et-fucking-cetera.
“What's all this junk doing here?” Jason demanded.
“First of all, chiqui, not junk. Second, a certain, ummm… father-in-law of mine took out the power of my workshop in one of his tantrums. Didn't I tell you?"
"No. Why would he do that?"
"Well, a certain father-in-law of yours pissed him off."
Jason sighed and up at the ceiling, “What did he do this time?”
Leo shrugged. “I dunno. God stuff. And tu padre is taking it out on me!”
Jason tapped his foot in annoyance and surveyed the room, “Did you have to do this in the bedroom?”
Leo shrugged again.
“Leo, mi amor, you gotta tidy this- hey, are you listening?”
Leo had turned away.
“Did you just turn off your hearing aid? Are you kidding me?”
No response. Jason tapped Leo on the shoulder and switched to ASL.
“This needs to be tidied up.”
Leo closed his eyes. Jason stamped his feet in frustration. Leo grinned, his eyes still closed.
Jason grabbed Leo’s shirt and pulled him into a quick kiss. Then he put a hand on Leo’s shoulder, and furiously tapped out a message in morse code.
“TIDY. NOW.”
“Umm… No hablo ingles.” Leo said.
Jason tapped out the same message, this time in Spanish.
Leo groaned again, “Fiiiinee,” He grumbled, “You got me. I’ll do it.” He opened his eyes and switched his hearing aid back on.
“What are you building, anyway?”
Leo sighed, “Typical children of Dionysus, god of theatre, to want a door that only opens if you scream “Veronica! open the, open the door please!” with the rage of a thousand daddy issues.”
“…and you can make that?”
“Well, I’m worried they’ll kill me with drain cleaner if I don’t.”
Leo started to shift piles of materials. Jason started to head to the door, then paused and said, “I’m sorry I called your stuff junk. You’re right. It’s not junk.”
“S’okay, bello. I forgive you.”
Jason kissed him on the cheek, then left the room.
Jason booted up the powerpoint and froze. He had forgotten what was on that lesson plan. The name on the title slide hit him like a brick, almost knocking the air from his lungs.
He could do this. It was fine, he could do this.
He stood up in front of the lecture hall and cleared his throat.
“G-Gaius Caesar Augustus Germanicus. A powerful Roman Emperor, known more commonly as C-“ His voice cracked, “… as Cal-“ Jason gripped the edge of the desk, and tried to blink away the sting in his eyes. Flashbacks shot through his mind, but he pushed them away. He swallowed, “Caligula,” He choked out.
Jason could still feel the impression his gladius left in his palm as he gripped it. He could still remember Caligula’s snarl as Jason approached.
“You’re one of those Camp Jupiter brats, aren’t you?”
“I’m Jason Grace,” he said, “Former praetor of the Twelfth Legion. Son of Jupiter. Child of Rome. But I belong to both camps.”
“Good enough,” Caligula growled, advancing slowly towards him, “I’ll hold you responsible for Camp Jupiter’s treason tonight.”
Jason tried to pull himself back to the present.
“He reigned f-from 37AD to 41…” He gripped the desk harder, his knuckles turning white, and forced down the bile that was rising in his throat.
A blur of memories, flashes of swords and fighting.
He remembered parrying Caligula’s spear with his gladius, every move costing him more and more energy. His muscles were weakening. He’d expended so much energy controlling the winds and the lightning.- he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep up the fight.
“Get out of here!” he called to his friends. “Go!”
“Umm… Professor Valdez?” A voice called, “Are you alright? You look-“
Jason’s ears were ringing. His vision was spinning. He blinked, and tried to bring the world into focus. His eyes fixed on something in the haze. A face, on a photograph. It was Leo’s face, in the home-screen of Jason’s laptop. A picture of them on a picnic date last fall. Jason took a deep breath and straightened up.
“Yeah… I’m- I’m fine,” he managed. He turned back to the projector screen, “Ca-Caligula’s empire stretched across-“ suddenly, he stumbled, and steadied himself on the desk. His head swam.
Pain shot up his left thigh. He glanced down, and saw an arrow sprouted from it. Jason grunted and stumbled. Piper yelled in warning as Caligula charged again. He just managed to roll aside. He remembered grabbing at the air, summoning Tempest with what strength he could spare. He rode against Caligula atop the ventus’ back, jousting sword versus spear. Another arrow took him in the upper arm.
He could feel the distinct acidic taste of vomit in his throat. “Ex- excuse me, class,” He blurted out, and rushed out of the hall.
“I told you this isn’t a game!” yelled Caligula. “You don’t walk away from me alive!”
Below, an explosion rocked the ship. The room was cloven further apart. Jason was bleeding from arrows in each limb now, yet raised his sword in defiance all the same. They circled one another on their horses in the cramped space, trading blows. Incitatus kicked at Tempest with his golden-shod front hooves. The ventus responded with bursts of electricity that scorched the stallion’s white flanks. The air was charged with electricity. He jabbed furiously at the Emperor, slashing like a Greek while Caligula stabbed like a Roman.
Through the fighting, he glimpsed Apollo across the room, standing dumbstruck next to Piper.
He managed to make it to the staff toilets and proceeded to dry-heave over the bowl. His pulse throbbed in his veins. His vision was a blur.
Jason had decided. Piper McLean would not die tonight. Apollo, Meg, all the others… they must live too. Keep fighting for what was right.
And then he thought about Leo.
As Caligula and he jousted around the ruins, knowing he was close to death, he thought about his best friend.
He thought about Leo putting his life before Jason’s to complete the prophecy- dying before Jason could stop him. He thought about the Oracle telling him his fate, and his one consolation being that he might re-unite with Leo in Elysium.
But Leo was alive. And Jason wouldn’t see him again.
He thought about that pointed face, those busy eyes, that sparkling smile. He thought about Leo, covered in scratches and scorch-marks. Tiny Leo, with his impish grin and his tooth gap and his excited bouncing. He thought about the Leo he had seen defeating a Primordial Goddess, that determination, the acceptance. He thought about the many hardships Leo had escaped, how he could face anything and pull through. As Jason fought, he thought about that brilliant, annoying, funny, tragic, genius, terrified, beautiful man- the many sides of him forming something wonderful. Something… human.
After growing up nothing but a soldier, meeting Leo had taught him for the first time how to be a person. Be human.
He met Apollo’s eyes across the ruined throne room.
“GO!” He yelled, “Remember!”
Remember what it’s like to be human.
These feelings replayed in Jason’s mind as he was brought back to that night. Everything he thought of in his final moments, before pain shot up from the middle of his chest, and everything went black.
He stayed there, hunched over the basin of the hollow throne, retching and blinking back tears. The memories began to dissipate, and Jason could think clearly again. Eventually, after much gagging, nothing came out. He flushed anyway, and sat back against the wall of the bathroom stall, breathing hard and shaking. With trembling fingers, he fished out his phone and dialled a number. It was demigod-safe… mostly. Leo had found a way to scramble the signal using modern VPN technology, but the longer you used it the more dangerous it got. It was for emergencies only.
The phone rang twice before Leo picked up.
“You’ve reached the line for the Greatest Husband in the Cosmos, how may I help you?”
“H-… H-help…” Jason repeated.
Leo’s tone instantly changed. “Jason? Jason, baby, what’s wrong? Mi vida, talk to me.”
“I… I need…”
Jason heard panicked clattering over the phone.
“Where are you? Stay there, I’ll find you. Are you at work? Are you safe? Jason, come on, say something.”
“I c-c-…. Ca-… I’m…” Jason swallowed, and listened to the sound of Leo on the other end of the phone, cursing in Spanish under his breath, the unmistakable sound of a frustrated ADHD demigod searching for his keys in a cluttered machine shop. It was a very familiar sound to Jason. He knew it well, and that calmed him. He took a deep breath, “I’m- I’m safe. I’m at New Rome University, I’ll meet you out front, l-lemme just…”
“I’ll be there in ten minuites, okay?” Leo said, “Don’t panic, I’m here. I’ve gotta hang up now, but I’m coming, don’t worry. Just… just hang in there, ‘til I can get to you. I’ll be there as quick as I can, you hear?”
“Y-yes. Okay.”
“Love you. See you in ten.”
“Love you.”
Jason watched Leo’s name blink off the screen. He took a few deep breaths, then unlocked the bathroom stall door.
He didn’t remember waking up on that California beach. He didn’t really remember much of the quest that followed.
The first thing that was clear in his mind was Leo’s face at that Santa Monica airport, grinning as he hopped off Festus’ back. He remembered rushing towards him, burying his face in that warm smell of motor oil and woodsmoke. He remembered laughing. He remembered smiling. Nothing else mattered in that moment. They were together at last.
But flashbacks and nightmares of that fight still haunted him.
On his way out to the front entrance, Jason stopped by the reception area and arranged to have a sub cover his class for the rest of the day. Then he walked out, taking in the fresh air.
He watched as Leo’s massive modified vintage Ford pick-up truck pulled into the drop-off zone. The passenger-side door opened to show Leo at the wheel, his face knotted with concern. Jason hopped inside and shut the door, sighing with relief as the air con blasted his face from the dashboard.
Leo seemed to read the situation instantly. He didn’t ask Jason what had happened. He didn’t smother him with soothing words. He just slapped the steering wheel of the truck (which was twice the size of his torso) and said, “Right. Ice cream?”
They ate their ice cream in the back of Leo's pick-up, parked on temple hill, looking out over the city. Leo had a scoop of lemon sorbet in a pot (he couldn’t have ice cream in a cone- it would melt in his hands and drip down the side before he could finish it. He needed a pot to catch the drips). Jason had a strawberry double-cone with white chocolate sprinkles and a flake.
"So..." Leo began.
"Nope," Jason said, "Don't wanna talk about it. Tell me about your machines."
Leo suddenly brightened, "I got this commission in from a mysterious outsider. Those are always the best."
“Oh?” Jason said, turning his head to lick a drip off his ice cream cone.
“It was an order for delivery. The guy was weird. He was a demigod, but he didn’t seem Greek or Roman.”
Jason was dimly aware that children of gods from other pantheons existed, but he didn’t cross paths with them very often.
“Anyway, it’s posing some interesting challenges, working with different metals, using different styles of metalwork. I’m learning a lot.”
“Sounds fun. Tell me more.”
Leo went on about the new techniques he’d discovered, and how it’s been improving his skill. Jason listened. He loved hearing Leo info-dump about his interests. If anything, it took his mind off old emperor booties. He loved the way Leo’s voice changed, his words slurring with eagerness as they spilled out of his mouth, his hands moving animatedly as he talked, flapping when he got excited. He loved how his curly hair bounced as Leo rocked backwards and forwards on the balls of his feet enthusiastically.
Jason bit off the last of the ice cream at the top, leaving only plain waffle-cone left. He wanted to eat it, but gave it to Leo instead to have with his sorbet. They both knew that the cone was the best bit of the ice cream.
They kept talking until the sun went down and the sky became bright with stars. Jason rested his head on Leo’s shoulder and yawned.
“Come on, sleepyhead. Let’s drive you home,” Leo said, nudging him affectionately.
Jason nodded, drowsily.
The car ride home was in comfortable silence. Leo kept his eyes on the road, but snuck glances at Jason sitting sleepily in the passenger seat.
“Thank you,” Jason said, “For turning a shitty day into a wonderful one.”
Jason explained everything that had happened in the lesson, running out and almost throwing up in the bathroom.
Leo listened in patient silence, his gaze locked on the sprawling city streets in front of them
"I'm sorry, Leo..." Jason said, "I'm moaning about almost dying when you actually did die, it's not-"
"Hey. Whoa. No. This isn't a competition. I don't wanna make you feel like you can't talk to me because my pain and sadness is more painful and sad than yours. You're hurting, I help. That's the deal. That's what I vowed to do. And you do the same for me. No matter what that hurt is, we support each other, capiche?"
Jason nodded, "Capiche. You're right. I'm sorry."
“What are you sorry for, mi estrella?” Leo asked, calmly.
“I… I don’t know…” Jason admitted.
“Exactly,” Leo said. And the matter was settled.
They slipped back into sleepy, non-verbal company until they made it back to their apartment.
Leo kept a little stool next to the forges, which was known only as “Jason’s chair”. Jason often sat, watching Leo stoke the flames. He loved to sit there and see him turning over coals with his bare hands, or working away at his desk next to it. Sometimes Jason got out his laptop and wrote lesson plans while Leo worked. Sometimes Jason helped- if just to be a human spark plug. Sometimes he just sat and observed. They would talk, or sing songs, or just work in silence.
“What’re you working on?” Jason asked from his chair.
Leo rubbed the back of his neck, “I’ve just finished the commission by those Dionysus kids. Hope they like it.”
He picked up his drink and sniffed it, obviously checking for drain cleaner. “I’m now working on a self-playing harp to add ambiance to the temple of Apollo,” He glanced at Jason and smiled, “The one that you re-designed on temple hill.”
He turned back to his blueprint, muttering to himself. Jason watched as he drew long lines across the page with his craftsman’s ruler. Leo touched a button on his hearing aid, and turned up a dial on a small radio in front of him on his desk. He’d rigged up his hearing aid to connect to it via bluetooth, so that he could listen to music as he worked.
The doorbell rang, and Leo opened it. He was greeted with a knife to the throat. He grinned.
Jason sat perfectly still on his stool, watching as Leo poured over his notebooks, nodding his head slightly along with the music in his ears. In their silence, he could just about hear the tinny voice of the music coming from the device. It sounded like Taylor Swift. It probably was.
“How’s my favourite sister-in-law?”
“Your reflexes could be sharper,” Thalia said in response, then she lowered her knife and pulled him into a tight hug. When they broke apart, and she saw Jason standing there, she grabbed him and squeezed him so fiercely Jason thought she might crack a rib.
“Food is on the stove,” Leo announced, “Should be ready in about half an hour. If Piper hasn’t already helped herself to it all.”
“When did McLean get here?” Thalia asked.
“She stayed overnight to sleep off the jet-lag,” Jason explained, then he clapped his hands together, “But now we’re all here, should we do presents?”
Leo shook his head, “Nah, man. Food first. Keep ‘em waiting. That’s how my mom did it. I’ll go see to the kitchen, you guys talk or something. It’ll only be another twenty minutes or so, anyway.”
After a very hearty Christmas dinner cooked by the notoriously skilled Chef Leo, they got to work passing round presents.
Leo had organised them into four little piles, and they took turns opening one present each.
Except there was one slight problem-
Jason had about five million more presents than everyone else. All a variety of sizes and shapes, all wrapped in the same bronze (recyclable) wrapping paper.
Leo didn’t seem to think this was an issue (“I may have made you a few more presents than what we agreed was the limit! So what?”), but Thalia and Piper were exchanging glances, worried they’d have to sit there and watch while Jason unwrapped each one individually and was subjected to a long explanation by Leo as to every device’s multiple functions. To make things go a little faster, they agreed to let Jason unwrap five presents per round instead of the usual one.
Was Jason complaining about how thoughtful his husband was? Fuck no. He loved it. He was gonna put a lot of these in his office when he got back to school.
Leo was first in the circle. Thalia got him a collection of various hides from monsters she had slain. Most of them were still fresh. Leo immediately grabbed a notebook and wrote down some ideas for contraptions he could use them in.
Jason was next. Leo had made him: A picture frame that unlocked and opened up into a shaving mirror, one of those ballerina jewellery boxes with a dancing Festus (Jason didn’t wear jewellery), a large polaroid camera that videoed and printed out Leo’s scroll holograms (“scrollograms!”), a key ring embossed with the words “te amo”, and an airbed pump.
“I thought we could try camping!”
“Leo, do we own a tent?”
Leo glanced nervously at a box-shaped present at the bottom of Jason’s pile.
Piper was next. Jason got her tickets to see Chappell Roan for the three of them. She actually teared up and flung herself into his arms. Leo bounced up and down and flapped his hands, squealing excitedly.
Leo had gotten Thalia the same thing he did every year- a bottle of Texas Hot Sauce.
They went round the circle a few more times, until they had a large pile of gifts next to them.
Alongside his animal pelts, Leo received 50 drachmas towards his Eras Tour Fund, a collection of more notebooks, and The Tortured Poets Department on CD from Jason (“So you don’t have to keep streaming it while you work and attract monsters to the workshop.”). He got another 75 to the Eras Tour Fund from Piper, and various tools from his wishlist. She also got him what looked like a dog coat, but it was fifty times the size.
“It’s for Festus!” She explained, “In case he gets cold in the winter!”
Piper received a customised surfboard from Leo, complete with badass (totally safe) modifications. She also got a large set of different-sized hunting knives from Thalia.
Jason got several thousand more gifts from Leo, which took up most of the sofa and the coffee table. Piper got him one of those fluffy oversized “oodies” that were all the rage online. It was blue, with a large superman logo on the front. Jason argued that he didn’t need to be any warmer than he already was, sleeping next to Leo. Somehow he still found himself buried in it anyway, the hood pulled down over his eyes, just enough so he could see. Thalia got him a framed photo of the two of them when Jason was just a baby.
“Where… where did you find this?” He asked, looking at the photograph, stunned.
“I have my ways,” She remarked, nonchalantly.
Piper had got Thalia a new leather jacket.
“Another one?” Jason asked, “You’ve got loads!”
Thalia shrugged, “All my old ones got blood on them.”
Lastly, Jason handed his gift to Thalia. She opened up the small rectangular box, and pulled out a hunting dagger. She unsheathed it, and examined it. It was hammered a little out of shape, and the blade was warped.
“I’m assuming this wasn’t made by the OG Valdez?” She asked, glancing at her brother.
Jason looked a little sheepish. Leo rubbed his back, reassuringly. “Your metalwork’s getting better, chiqui. It’s good! You can’t help the fact that you’re married to one of the best and most advanced weaponsmiths in the Greco-Roman pantheon. But it’s good work.”
Thalia gave him a sisterly kiss on the cheek. “I love it. Thank you.”
Jason gave her a tight, one-armed hug.
“I actually have something else for you,” Thalia said to him.
“Oh?”
“It’s not a gift, exactly just… news.”
“Good news?” Leo asked.
Thalia neither confirmed nor denied this, just said: “I got a call from someone a couple weeks ago. Our cousins. On our mom’s side. I met them a couple of times as a kid but mom blipped off the radar once she was expecting you. They’d found out I was still out there recently and wanted to get back in touch. They didn’t know about you. I didn’t tell them. I said I’ll think about it, but honestly? I want nothing to do with them. I don’t want to be associated with anything to do with Mom, after what she did to you. And anyway, it’ll be a bitch to explain to them why I still look sixteen. But I thought it was only right you should know, in case you were interested in getting to know them.”
Jason was a little speechless. He’d never really considered the fact that he might have extended family out there. Other Graces. He wasn’t sure what to do. That didn’t bother him though. When he wasn’t sure about something, he’d talk it through with Leo. They’d figure it out together.
Family games began. After a rather violent round of charades, cut short by the fire alarm being set off by someone who will remain nameless, they decided on karaoke.
“KNEE-DEEP IN THE PASSENGER SEAT AND YOU’RE EATING ME OUT-“ Leo and Piper screamed in unison, using the deodorant bottle and the TV remote as fake microphones. They’d moved the coffee table out the way and the two of them were now singing their hearts out in the middle of the living room while Jason and Thalia watched from the couch.
Jason glanced nervously at a vase that was getting dangerously close to Leo’s flailing arms. Maybe Karaoke hadn’t been the best idea.
Piper was yelling furiously into her deodorant bottle, eyes closed, giving her best theatre-kid belt.
Leo was on his knees, screaming at the top of his lungs.
“FUCKED YOU IN THE BATHROOM WHEN WE WENT TO DINNER, YOUR PARENTS AT THE TABLE, YOU WONDER WHY I’M BITTERRRRR- hey! Hey, Jason! Do you think me and Piper should start a band? No, but really? I’ve already picked out our name, we’d be called “Piping Hot!” I think we should do it. Piper? Should we do it?”
“I married that man,” Jason reminded Thalia.
“Y’know, we did ask Chappell Roan if she wanted to join the hunters,” Thalia remarked.
Piper spun around so fast she almost wacked Leo in the face, “Ohh my gods tell me EVERYTHING.”
“This was before I joined,” Thalia said, “And she said no. But she still invites Lady Artemis to her concerts sometimes.”
Piper shoved herself in between the two siblings on the sofa, and began bouncing up and down in excitement as Thalia told stories of all the amazing women who have been asked to join the hunters over the years.
Jason, feeling a little crowded, stood up from the couch and went into the bedroom.
He groaned and rubbed his temples. Soon, he felt hands creep from his waist and hug him around the middle. Leo leaned his warm body into him, and rested his chin on Jason’s shoulder.
“Hmm…You okay?” Leo mumbled.
“Yeah…” Jason stayed in Leo’s embrace for a few seconds, then pulled away, leaning against the dresser.
Leo leaned next to him, sighing and folding his arms.
“You still thinking about what Thalia said? About your cousins?”
“Yeah…” Jason said, again. He turned to him, “What do you think I should do?”
Leo was silent for a few moments. “I dunno…”
“You have family, don’t you?” Jason asked.
Leo’s shoulders tensed slightly. Jason could see his expression become a little guarded, which hardly happened to Jason anymore. But biological family was a touchy subject for both of them. “Yeah. Lots.”
“Do you… ever think about getting back in touch? After everything that’s happened-“
Leo shook his head vigorously, “Nuh-uh. No way. I think it’s safe to say I don’t have the best experience with my extended family. My own cousins? They used to beat me up for being weird and skinny. I don’t owe those people a gods-damned thing.” He looked down, sadly, “And anyway, I tried… once. Chiron told me, after the fight with Gaea, that he called them to tell them I was dead. They just… didn’t care. My Aunt yelled at him for disturbing her and hung up the phone.”
“That’s horrible!”
Leo shrugged, “I don’t need them. I got you guys.” He glanced fondly through the open doorway of their room, over at Piper and Thalia, who were watching Mean Girls on the sofa (they both had a crush on Regina George), “You’re all the family that I need.”
“Still… there’s something to be said for finding your roots. Your blood. Could be a community there.”
Jason had spent his whole life trying to find where he fit. Camp Jupiter, Camp Half-Blood, on the Argo II, in the mortal world. He’d eventually found his place, with Piper and Leo. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t expand his people. His pack. If his relatives genuinely cared about him, and wanted to meet him…
Leo ran his hands through his hair, “Yeah… I get why some people think blood is important. But not for me. I love my mom because she raised me, not because she gave birth to me. You and Piper… you’ve showed me more love and kindness than the people that are s’pposed to take care of me. You’re my family.” He paused, then added, “But hey, I mean… If finding your blood relatives is what you need to do, then do it.”
“Plus,” Jason added, “If we ever have kids… hypothetically speaking… it might be nice for them to know their heritage.”
“It would…” Leo agreed, “But it’s not necessary.”
Jason sighed, “I don’t know why I’m getting all worked up about this. They don’t even know I exist yet. I guess I’ve sort of always had this fantasy of a nice, nuclear family structure. I know it’s stupid, but-“
“No, it’s not stupid!” Leo said, pulling away from the dresser and turning to face him, “If it’s something you want, then it’s something you want. It’s okay to want normalcy. Everyone has their own beliefs about what family should be. Yeah, it’s the template a western society pushes onto us, but that doesn’t make it inherently evil. It’s nice to want to know the people you’re related to. We’re pack animals- it’s in our nature,” he sighed, “Look. All I’m saying is I’ve done the whole “blood relatives” thing, and it didn’t work out for me, so I adjusted to live without it. Thalia didn’t want it either. That’s her choice. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try.”
“But what if they’re shitty, like yours?”
“Then we just say fuck ‘em and we’ll go get ice cream.”
Jason rested his head on Leo’s shoulder, “You’re my favourite husband, did you know that? You’re just the best.”
Leo smiled, “And, if they’re really nice? Then… count yourself lucky, I guess. Not everyone can have that.”
“But you’ll have it,” Jason said, “Any family that is mine is yours now. If I get some shiny new family members then they’ll be yours, too. You might finally be accepted into a big clan of people.”
“That would be kinda nice,” Leo admitted, “But I’ll be happy either way. I’m happy just with you, bello. It is a wonderful dream, don’t get me wrong, and I love that you think it could happen. And I don’t wanna tell you to not get your hopes up, just… I dunno, I guess I find it hard to believe that a wider family like that could accept someone, love them unconditionally just because they share a few genes. But that reflects more about me than it says about you. I think you should go for it.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
Jason nodded to the open doorway, “Come on, let’s go back out there before they decide to make Fetch happen.”
Jason thought fondly back to a conversation they’d had a few years ago, during one of their sessions of sitting together in the workshop.
“Hey, hermoso?”
“Hmm?” Leo looked up from his sketches. Jason still remembered it now. It was summer, and hot. Leo had tied his hair back to keep it out of his face as he worked. His bronze hearing aid glinted in the low evening light. This was back before they were married, and Leo’s engagement ring twitched a little on Leo’s ring finger as he tapped on the desk.
“I-I was thinking… what if I… changed my name?”
Leo had put his pencil down and turned in his chair, so that he was facing Jason.
“What, like, Fernando Grace or something?”
“No, the, er… the last name. In marriage.”
“So… Grace-Valdez? Or… Valdez-Grace?”
Jason shifted on the seat of his stool. Leo’s amber-brown eyes watched him, noting every tender movement, twitch, and mannerism as Jason sat before him.
“Well… how about just Jason Valdez?”
Leo thought for a moment. “You sure Fernando is off the table? Because I think-“
“Leo, I’m serious.”
“Sorry, I’m just uncomfortable with emotions,” Leo said, “That is… wow. It’s a lot to process… You’re really serious? Like, genuinely?”
“Yeah!” I mean… my mom was kind of a… a…”
“A bitch.”
“Yes. That. I’m perfectly fine with letting her name die out. I don’t really want to be associated with her, or-or what she’s done. But I want you to be a part of me. A part of my identity. I want to be a Valdez. If… If you’d let me.”
Leo’s expression was hard to read at first, Jason could see the cogs turning in Leo’s brain, thinking a million thoughts at once, but then he broke into a gigantic smile.
“Oh Jason! Of course! If you’re sure?”
“Yes,” Jason said, reaching out and taking both Leo’s hands in his, “I am sure.”
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [Okay, so I’ve hit my limit for pictures per posts, so I can’t use any more of those cool page dividers I made, so we’ll have to just pretend ;)] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
Jason walked into his office the first day back from Winter Break.
He sat down in his office chair, and booted up the PC monitor. While he was waiting for it to load, he sat back and surveyed everything on his desk. This was his morning ritual: count your blessings, you have a lot more than you used to.
His eyes fixed on a photograph. Him and Leo at the altar on their wedding day.
Thalia stood to the left in her Best Man’s suit. Percy, Nico, Will, and Reyna had all been groomsmen. Piper stood to Leo’s right as his Maid of Honour. Frank had refused to wear the bridesmaid’s dress that Leo had picked out, and instead settled for a dark blue tux that really did kind of suit him. He stood beside Hazel, just behind Piper. The entire Hephaestus cabin had been the bridal party (little Harley had been a very cute flower boy). Even Hephaestus himself was there, and had agreed to walk Leo down the aisle. Jupiter hadn’t shown. Figures. Jason had to admit that he’d hoped his father would be there, but it was wishful thinking. He didn’t dwell on it though- that day had been the happiest day of his life, he wasn’t going to let his deadbeat daddy ruin it for him.
They were married in June- the sacred month dedicated to Juno. In Roman times, this was meant to be good luck and a blessing on your marriage. While both Jason and Leo had a… complicated relationship with the goddess, they tried their best to keep things civil for the sake of the special day.
Jason had worn a traditional Roman toga. It was white with gold embroidery. Leo had, of course, designed that as well. He was amazing with a sewing machine.
Leo wore a well-fitted tuxedo. The fabric was enchanted to flicker red and gold- with flashes of white and blue, like hot flames. He called it “girl-on-fire core”. It was lined with dragon hide on the inside, making it fireproof.
Wreaths of violets and marigolds adorned the wedding arch. Jason held Leo’s calloused hands in his own, feeling the heat coming off of them in waves, like holding a mug of hot chocolate on a cold Christmas day.
Aphrodite stood next to them under the arch, officiating the wedding.
“Do you, Jason Grace, take Leonidas-“
Leo coughed.
“… Leo Valdez, to be your husband- wed in both mortal law and in the eyes of the gods? Do you, in front of all the people gathered here today, pledge to be true and devoted to him, to have and to hold for eternity? From this day forward, do you vow to be with him, for better for worse, for richer, for poorer, forever? In good times and bad, in sickness and in health, do you promise to love and honor him all the days of your life and beyond, never to part, even in death?”
Jason gripped Leo’s hands in his. He knew that the goddess Aphrodite was right next to him, but honestly? He didn’t give a flying fuck about her. And that was coming from the Flying Fuck himself. All he could look at was Leo. Leo was the most beautiful person in that room. He knew that would definitely displease the goddess, but Jason had given his whole life trying to serve the will of the gods. Now, he was creating a new life. With the phenomenal man in front of him.
Jason felt Leo’s fingers tapping against Jason’s palms where their hands were grasped. A familiar rhythm that Jason knew well. Two short taps. Short tap, long tap, two short taps. Three long taps. Three short taps and a long tap. Tap. Long tap, short tap, long tap, long tap. Three long taps. Two short taps, one long tap.
Jason grinned.
“I do.”
Maybe Aphrodite smiled then, Jason didn’t know. He was lost in Leo’s deep eyes, looking at him and him only.
“I really, really do.”
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [ L+J] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
“Shit!” Jason whispered, as the fork fell to the ground with a loud clatter, “Shhh!” He told the fork, which probably didn’t help.
Leo was asleep on the in the living-room. He’d had another nightmare and had woken up in flames, scorching the duvet. After much consolation that no, Jason had not been hurt in the fire and that yes, it was just a dream, he had finally passed out curled in Jason’s arms, watching Frozen II on the sofa. That was at 5am.
It was now midday and Leo was still asleep. It was his day off, so Jason was currently trying to cook his husband breakfast. There was just one small issue…
Jason couldn’t cook.
He fussed about in their little kitchenette that led off their open-plan living/dining space, a Stand-Up Comedy Special on in the background, the volume down low so as not to wake Leo. He’d somehow managed to burn the avocado, meanwhile the hash-browns were still frozen cold in the middle. He was beginning to get super frustrated with this breakfast burrito. Why couldn’t he have just made cereal instead? But he wanted to do something nice for Leo, and thank him for all the times Leo had cooked.
“Fry bacon over medium heat until crispy,” Jason muttered to himself. As soon as he set the skillet down, the outlets sparked, causing the induction hob to short-circuit, the digital display blinking out. Jason tried several times, but it refused to switch back on. “Fine, be that way!” Jason snapped at the hob.
He didn’t really understand why Leo couldn’t just eat the bacon raw. Jason had been raised by wolves after all- he’d done it loads of times and had only gotten sick twice. But Leo loved food, especially good food. It reminded him of home, of his mother, and family gatherings where everyone all sat around the table good-naturedly, united by the meal enough to not yell at each other. Those mealtimes were the only happy memories Leo had of the family that had kicked him out on the streets and ruined his life. It was safe to say the other Valdezes had not been present at their wedding.
Jason thought back to his own upbringing. How his mom had been so drunk and zonked out that she’d forget to feed him and Thalia. Jason had been so hungry, he’d tried to eat a stapler. He knew Leo had had similar experiences on the streets, and, while Leo had never admitted it, that was probably one of the reasons why he was so short and skinny.
He’d gained a lot of weight since Jason had first seen him on that bus, which Jason was proud of. He imagined that he’d been even thinner before. He was glad to see Leo getting better, but part of him was still sad to see the damage it had done.
Jason wished he could cook. Maybe it was some primal wolf urge to look out for the runt of the litter, but also food was a comfort for Leo, and cooking was a love language to him. He wanted more than anything to make him good meals, see his face light up when he made him something.
“I’m not gonna fuck this up this time,” Jason muttered through gritted teeth. The thought of Leo’s proud expression when he showed off his culinary creation kept him going. He decided to light a small fire over the miniature brasier they kept on the countertop for offerings (scraped a bit of bacon and some sliced tomato into it, praying to Edesia, Roman goddess of Banquets for good luck) and decided to fry the bacon the old fashioned way.
Leo woke up at 1pm (Jason was glad he’d gotten at least the recommended eight hours of sleep). Jason immediately set the plate of burritos down on the coffee table in front of him, grinning eagerly.
Leo reached out and took the burrito, looking perplexed. He examined its contents, “You- you made this?”
“Yup.”
“You cooked?”
“Sure did.”
Leo glanced back at their kitchenette, as if checking for explosion marks. He sniffed the tortilla, cautiously. Jason sat on the edge of the armchair next to him, bouncing up and down a little on the cushion. He could almost imagine his tail wagging in anticipation.
Leo bit into the wrap, and his face lit up. “This is actually not bad! You’re getting better.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, querido. Es muy bueno. You can make this for me again.”
Jason beamed, proud of himself.
“Did you spend all morning on this?”
“I did. I wanted to do something special to cheer you up. I’m glad you like it.”
Leo took another bite. “Oh what a joy to wake up to!” He said, “You really are the best Husband ever.”
“I can’t be,” Jason said, “You exist.”
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [ L+J] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
As the students filed out of the lecture hall, Jason turned and saw Leo leaning against the doorframe. He was dressed in his usual suspenders and tool belt, this time over a black button-up shirt. A clean one, which was unlike Leo. He looked surprisingly dashing with his freshly-washed hair and his brown Doc Martens. Several of Jason’s students had stopped to stare at him, whispering behind their hands. Jason watched as Leo produced a bouquet of violets and marigolds from the back pocket of his tool belt.
Jason walked forward and accepted them, then kissed him on the cheek.
“What’s the occasion, mi cielo?” Jason asked.
“No occasion,” Leo said, “I just love you.”
Jason spied a few of his students taking pictures on their phones.
“You better not be posting those online,” Jason told them, “If I get home to find a hoard of monsters raiding our apartment you’re all getting Ds, understand?”
They nodded. He turned back to Leo.
“There’s still some work I’ve gotta finish up,” Jason whispered.
“Me too,” Leo whispered back, “But… can we talk? Later?”
“Oh! Yes, of course,” Jason said. He could feel himself blushing. His students were staring at them, giggling.
Leo noticed them too. He switched to American Sign Language.
“Let’s go to that restaurant we like. I’ll meet you there at 8pm.”
“Fancy!” Jason signed, “Are you sure this isn’t a special occasion?”
Leo smiled. “I just wanna take you out! I have money, I’m allowed to take my husband out on a date! Just don’t be late. I’ll see you there.”
He gave Jason another peck on the cheek. “I gotta run,” He said, “But talk later, okay?”
“Okay!” Jason called, as Leo rushed off.
Jason stood there, agape, for a few seconds, before the excited whispers from the small crowd of students snapped him out of it.
“Gods, I hope that was his husband.” “He’s so skinny!” “I thought children of Hephaestus were supposed to be huge!” “And ugly, but he was kinda cute.” “No, guys, did you see he’s got, like, five million photos of him on his desk-“
Jason cleared his throat, and they stopped abruptly, “Yes, if you’re curious, that was Mr Valdez. No, I will not be taking further questions at this time. Umm… Class dismissed.”
The gaggle of students left, dragging their feet and sneaking glances back at Jason, talking in hushed whispers.
A little dazed, he made his way up to his office and walked inside. Jason realised he was still holding the bouquet of flowers Leo had given him. He walked over to his desk, emptied his half-drunk cup of tea, washed the mug out and filled it up with water (Leo often teased him for drinking tea. He said it made him look like a British Grandpa. But Jason liked it). He plopped the flowers in it, and sat down at his desk to grade papers.
The sun had set in the early january hours when he heard a faint rap on his door. He looked up. Standing nervously in the doorway was one of his quieter students, Joshua.
“Umm… Professor Valdez?” He asked in a small voice.
“What is it, Joshua?”
“Can- can I come in?”
Jason gestured for the kid to sit down in the chair facing his desk.
“I was- I was working on a project for my Greek Studies course, and we had to write about one difference between Roman and Greek society…”
“Yes…?”
“Well, I wanted to write about how Greeks viewed queer identity compared to the Romans? Because they, like, had fundamentally different views on gender and sexuality and it’s super interesting to me. I know you’re a Roman History professor but you’re also one of the only queer teachers I know, and you’re also just a really good teacher in general… I was wondering if you could help me?”
Jason signalled for him to shuffle over to his side of the desk. He pulled up a few websites on his computer, and began talk about examples of different Greek art that depicted men-loving-men relationships.
They talked for a while, but then Joshua interrupted, pointing to one of the photos on Jason’s desk. “Is that your husband?”
Jason picked up the picture and smiled, “Yes. That’s us at a wedding we went to last spring.” It had been Hazel and Frank’s wedding.
“Woah…” he whispered. He paused, then said, “You know, I’ve always looked up to you. I grew up hearing stories about the Seven demigods who sailed on the Argo II. You’re all huge inspirations.”
Jason nodded at the photograph, “I think so too, that’s why I married one.”
“What was it like… all those months sailing, facing all those terrible monsters?”
Jason remembered back to all those times he’d found Leo crying in the engine room, shivering after a particularly viscous monster attack, a nightmare, or another dirt-formed vision of Gaea. Those tearful nights spent consoling him.
“It… it was hard, especially seeing as we were just teenagers. But at least we had each other.”
Joshua looked at the Rubik’s cube with its self-shuffling sides, “Woah. Did he get you that?”
“He made it, actually. He is one of the best mechanics in the western hemisphere, after all.“
Jason picked it up, fondly, turning it over in his fingers.
The conversation carried on, drifting (as all good conversations do) to Sappho and her poetry. It wasn’t until Jason checked the clock that he realised the time.
“Shit, I gotta meet the Mister for dinner in fifteen minutes. Sorry, Joshua.”
He scribbled down the titles of a few books the kid could borrow from the library, and shouldered his bag. Joshua thanked him and left.
Jason picked up his keys and went to turn off the light. Before he left, he turned and looked at the flowers in the cup. Violets and marigolds. The same flowers they’d had at their wedding. Purple and orange, like the colours of Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter. Leo had an appreciation for a good metaphor.
He turned out the light and left his office, locking the door behind him.
They were one of the first Greco-Roman couples to get married since the camps discovered each other. Their wedding had been a celebration of the merging of both sides. It was becoming more and more commonplace now, but they were in the early stages of creating new traditions between these partnerships.
Jason had always tried to do things a little differently. He’d never liked it when he was told he had to uphold all these “Roman Values” in order to be perfect. He didn’t want to have to fit in a mould. That’s one of the countless reasons why he loved Leo so much. Leo wasn’t perfect. He didn’t try to be. He faked smiles and confidence for survival, but he never stopped being so unapologetically himself while doing it. And when Jason was around him, he couldn’t care less about what people thought he should be. Leo made him a better person because of that.
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [ L+J] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
Jason thought back to their wedding day again.
He remembered their first dance, to the song “Fast Car” by Tracy Chapman. Jason stumbled over his feet a little as they danced. Later that night, Leo had torn up the dance floor doing the Macarena. Jason wondered how Leo had managed to go all night without bursting into flames.
Much parties and drinking ensued. Jason was swamped with guests, congratulating him. He made polite conversation with them all, and was so distracted he didn’t even realise that Leo had left the room.
He felt a quick surge of panic as he searched for him, but it soon subsided when he saw Leo out on the balcony of the wedding venue, looking out at the city. He’d taken off his jacket and it was folded on the rail next to him.
The relief gave way to concern, though, when he saw that Leo was on fire.
Jason walked over to him and leaned on the balcony railing next to him, just out of reach of the flames, “Long day?” He asked, trying not to show the worry in his voice.
“Good day,” Leo replied, smiling at him. Jason instantly relaxed.
“Sorry I left- just had to get away from the crowds and cool off,” Leo nodded at the suit jacket, flames licking his face, “That’s the last time I wear something with heat-suppressing polymers. I had to, for safety and all, but man… it was so stuffy. I felt like I couldn’t breathe.” Leo’s chest crackled quietly with the fire in the cool evening air, “Anyway, I needed to decompress. Let some of it out. “
“Understandable. It’s an emotional night.”
“I’m just so incredibly happy, Jason,” Leo said, “It’s hard to keep contained.”
Looking at Leo, Jason felt little zzzts of electricity buzzing through his hair. Yeah, he understood.
“Socialisation is exhausting,” Leo admitted, “Especially when you’re masking. Especially at an intense event like this. But don’t think I’m upset. I’m not. Just a little… overstimulated.”
Jason smiled, “I understand. Take all the time you need. Soon, though, we’ll be off on our honeymoon. Just you and I, alone together.”
Leo closed his eyes at the pleasure of the thought, “That would be nice.”
“Gods, I’m eager to get out of this toga. It’s itchy as heck.”
They exchanged a quick side-eye.
Jason sidled a little closer, careful to keep the fabric of his clothes out of reach of the flames. “I wish I could kiss you,” he said, frowning at the red fire brushing against Leo’s cheek.
“Hold your pegasi, lightning boy! We’re spending the rest of our lives together- there’ll be plenty of opportunities for you to kiss me, don’t you worry.”
“I guess you’re right,” Jason replied.
Leo softened, “Your company’s enough for me, amor mio. That’s all I need.”
Jason looked back at the open doorway, at the party in the venue behind them. “Well I should probably get back in there. They’ll be wondering where we are. If anyone asks, I’ll tell them you’re constipated.”
“How very dignified of you.”
Jason looked into Leo’s eyes, his brown irises turning orange in the glittering fire that wreathed his face, “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Jason went back into the building, looking back at his husband and smiling. Then he proceeded to rejoin the party.
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [ L+J] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
Leo was waiting for him outside the restaurant. He now wore a black suit jacket over his black shirt and suspenders. Jason knew that it had been stolen from his wardrobe. Leo didn’t own many suits.
He’d chosen a table for two under the awning outside the restaurant. Jason kissed him on the cheek when he saw him and sat down across from him. A waitress came over and took their drinks order.
“Umm… Tea, please. Earl Grey.”
“Earl Grey?” Leo said, “That even sounds like a British Grandpa.”
Jason ignored him, “Milk, two sugars please.”
“Hey, whatever floats your trireme, man. And can I have the umm… the umm…” Leo clicked his fingers and scrunched up his face in concentration, “Come on, English!! The… frothy… cow… juice…”
“The what?”
Leo mimed a complicated charade of drinking a certain beverage, which Jason attempted to decipher.
“A… milkshake?”
Leo snapped his fingers and pointed at Jason, “Yes. That. See? I knew I married you for a reason.”
Jason shook his head in disbelief, “I apologise for… whatever that was,” He said to the waitress, “English isn’t his first language.”
“Shut up Valdez," Leo said.
Jason smiled.
The waitress flashed them her customer-service grin and left with their orders. Jason turned to Leo, his perfect Leo, sitting there across the restaurant table just looking perfect. Jason beamed at him.
"What?" Leo asked, upon seeing the cheesy expression on Jason's face.
"Nothing..." Jason said, "So what is it you wanted to talk about?"
Leo ran his hands through his hair. Even after all these years, he still knew how to take the breath out of Jason’s lungs.
“Umm… well, I was thinking hard about that conversation we had a couple months ago, I just haven’t been able to get it out of my mind since…”
“Leo, we’ve had a lot of conversations in the last couple months-“
“The one about having kids! I’ve been thinking…”
“Yes…?” Jason said, dreading what might come next.
“And I’ve decided,” Leo said, twisting the ring around his finger.
Jason held his breath.
“I wanna do it. I want to start a family. At some point. In the future. Not right now, but at some point.”
Jason actually jumped up from his seat. He hugged Leo.
“Oh, Leo, that’s so good to hear!!!”
“Yeah, well… I love you. And I guess, as the son of the God of Creation… I want to create something. With you. Something more than just a Roomba,” he sighed, “I’m not good with organic life forms, but that’s what we do, isn’t it? We face challenges together. We don’t always do things in our comfort zone, but ultimately we risk it for what it’s worth at the end… I dunno, I’m getting cheesy.”
Jason smiled, “I love your cheesiness, Leo.”
Just then, the waitress came back with their drinks and took their dinner orders. Once she left, Jason turned back to Leo.
“You know,” Jason joked, “Since I actually didn’t die fighting Caligula, I’ve always wondered what the Sibyl meant by I will “three letters, starts with D”. I’m guessing, since we re-united after the fight it meant things would eventually lead to “Dad”.”
“Or you’ve been dead this whole time, and this is a delusional Elysium dream,” Leo said in a monotone voice.
“Wh-what?” Jason hurriedly scanned Leo’s face for any sign of a joke, but for some reason he couldn’t quite meet his eyes. They were distorted somehow, like trying to see a monster through the Mist. Fog swirled around the two of them, so Jason lost sight of their surroundings, only Leo’s weirdly blank face. He caught a flash of Leo laughing- a burst between the freakily deadpan expression Leo wore. It was like something had glitched.
Suddenly, the room brightened. They were back in the restaurant, and Leo was looking at him with a curious expression, his brow knotted slightly in concern.
“I didn’t say anything,” Leo said.
“You… You said…” Jason tried to think back to their previous conversation, but his memory of it was somehow distant- like a wound closing from ambrosia.
Leo cocked his head to one side, “You sure you’re alright, Jase?”
Jason blinked, “I’m- I’m fine.” He shook his head, trying to clear the confusion. “Long day. Just a little sleep-deprived. Probably hallucinating. What were we talking about, again?”
“Baby names,” Leo reminded him.
“Oh, right.”
“I think Leo Jr is a very strong name for a child,” Leo said, “Imagine, “Leonidas Valdez the Second! Badass Warrior Mechanic!”
“But what if it’s a girl?”
Leo paused for a few seconds, then said “I was thinking… I could name her after my mom?”
Jason frowned, “Names have power though. While I love the sentiment, I don’t think naming your kid after someone who died young is a very good idea.”
Leo sighed, “You’re right.”
“But it’s a lovely thought, though.”
“Yeah…”
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Jason walked into class the next morning.
“Hey, Professor! How’s your twink?”
“He’s not my-“ Jason began, “Well, yes, he is kind of a twink. And he is mine. What’s your point?”
The students laughed.
Jason turned to the projector screen and began to talk, when a student interrupted him.
“Tell us more about your husband, Professor!”
Jason knew this trap. They were trying to de-rail the lesson, get Jason talking about something else and forget to set the homework. If they thought they were gonna get away with not having to learn about Roman History for half a lesson they were wrong. Jason wasn’t gonna fall for their games and tricks.
But oh! He was a sucker for talking about Leo. As much as he wanted to resist, he found himself sinking into a ramble about his husband’s amazingness.
“I mean, he’s only the best thing to come from Huston, Texas. Like, ever. And that includes Beyoncé.”
The entire lecture hall gave a collective gasp of shock.
“You’re not serious, sir?” A student in the front row whispered.
“I am. And I don’t say that lightly either,” Jason may have been raised by wolves, but even he understood Beyoncé’s reverence. “I very much respect Queen Bey and what she does. You know she’s actually a minor goddess now?”
“Really? The gods made her one?” Another student heckled.
Jason shook his head, “No, not the gods. Much like how the Roman Emperors survived for thousands of years because of how much they were worshipped by their subjects, Beyoncé’s cult following has helped her ascend to goddesshood too.”
“Woah…”
“I’d be surprised if the Eras Tour doesn’t do the same thing for Taylor Swift. My husband loves her. We wanna get tickets, but that would mean our kids will never be able to afford to go to college, so… it’s still open for negotiation.”
A student raised his hand, “What other celebrities became gods from their worship?”
“Well,” Jason said, leaning back on his desk, “Have you ever heard of a band called the Beatles?”
Once the lesson had ended, Jason was approached by one of his students. It was Joshua, the kid he’d helped with homework.
“I- I just wanted to thank you for your help, Professor. On the essay. I got a really high grade and I passed my class!”
Jason grinned, “That’s great to hear! I don’t wanna give too much away but I have a feeling you’ll do very well in this class, too.” He tapped the side of his nose, like he was telling some big secret.
Joshua still looked a little nervous, like he had something more to say but wasn’t sure if he should.
“Is everything alright, Joshua?” Jason asked, giving him his kindest smile.
“It’s just… umm… I wanted to thank you for being my favourite teacher. You’re such an inspiring role model… my- my parents, they d-don’t really like the sort of stuff I’m studying… the sort of stuff I was writing that essay about. They’re traditional, see? All about upholding Good Roman Values. But you, being so open about who you are, and about your husband… from someone as heroic and influential as yourself… it meant a lot to me.”
Before Jason knew what was happening, Joshua gave him a quick, tight hug. “Thank you,” the kid whispered. Then he shouldered his backpack, and left the lecture hall.
Jason may or may not have cried a little.
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Jason pushed a button, and a large metal door opened inwards onto Leo’s warehouse. He stepped inside, his footsteps echoing on the hard concrete floor. From the cavernous ceiling hung car engines, machine parts, and large automatons. All around him were cluttered racks, standing shelves, and an assortment of other storage solutions. Jason wove his way through the labyrinthine pathways forged from kicked-aside projects. He was carrying a large take-out bag from the Greek Restaurant across the street from campus. Despite the large open space, there wasn’t much room to walk, so he picked his way apprehensively through the mess, nervous that he might step either on some prized masterpiece, or something explosive.
He spotted Leo’s apprentice, Penny, working the forges in the back of the gigantic space. She was hammering out a sheet of stygian iron, her mousy-blonde hair tied messily out of the way. She wore large welder’s goggles, and oversized Dragon-hide gloves.
He gingerly stepped over machinery and made his way over to her, greeting her with a nod. She stopped hammering, and pushed her goggles onto her head with a gloved finger.
“Where’s your Jedi Master?” Jason asked.
She set her hammer down on a nearby workbench and glanced expectantly at his take-out bag. He reached in, brought out a greasy Tupperware box, un-popped the lid, and handed her one of the dolmades. Her expression didn’t waver, she continued to stare at the bag. Jason rolled his eyes and begrudgingly gave her another one. This seemed to satisfy her. “He’s up on the roof,” she said, popping the stuffed vine leaf into her mouth.
He thanked her, and made his way up the metal spiral staircase that led to the roof.
He found Leo sitting on the roof’s edge, facing away from him. Festus sat next to him on his hind legs, his large metal tail wrapped around him like a cat. They both turned when Jason came up. He walked over to them, patted the dragon’s bronze jaw affectionately, and sat down next to Leo, putting the take-out bag between them. He began to dish out the food. Leo raised an eyebrow at the missing dolmades.
“I had to bribe Penny to tell me where you were,” Jason admitted.
Leo chuckled and shook his head in disbelief. His dark curls bounced in the golden light of the setting sun. “That girl has learned well. Never waste an opportunity to swindle free food.”
“Oh, I see. You taught her that.”
They laughed, kicking their dangling feet off the concrete warehouse walls.
“So how was your day?” Leo asked.
Jason scratched Festus’ chin, absent-mindedly. He thought about Joshua, and about the other kids in his class. He thought about how proud he was of the papers he graded. He thought about the bright young minds. Jason had grown up fighting in the legion. He’d faced untold horrors in order to save the world. So had Leo. And they still were saving it in their own way. By passing his knowledge onto the next generation, he felt safe knowing that the future was in their hands. By teaching his students about demigod life, about Roman History, and also teaching them that it was okay for a tough Roman soldier to love another man, he felt like he was still doing all he could to protect the world, but he’d found a less life-threatening way to do it.
“My day was good,” He told him, “What about yours?”
As Leo talked about his latest commissions, Jason looked around him. He remembered how much Leo had saved up to be able to afford to buy this place. But he needed a place to keep Festus (Terminus had been very particular about where the dragon had been allowed to stay, since he technically counted as a weapon). It had meant their honeymoon was spent in some discount resort in the south of Mexico with a low budget hotel room, drinking cheap wine. Jason wouldn’t have traded it for the world.
Leo really did love his machine shop. It had been a dream of his to own one since as long as Jason had known him. He knew that part of that was guilt for burning down the one his mom owned in Texas, that had been in his family for three generations. But Jason could see by the way Leo treated the space that he kept it working to honour his mom. And although Jason had never met Esperanza, he could feel her spirit in the air in this place.
He wondered if she’d be happy for her son that they’d found each other. Jason thought she would. She’d be so proud of Leo- how could she not? Leo was the best thing that had ever happened to Jason. He’d fought tooth and nail to save the world, and now they were living happily in New Rome.
Are we happy? A little voice in the back of Jason’s head said. They still had troubles and hardships ahead of them. Leo still struggled to sleep with the nightmares. Jason still couldn’t say Caligula’s name. People still looked down on Jason for dating the Greek who fired on New Rome. People still gave Jason shit for taking the last name of the man he loved. Queer kids in Jason’s class still struggled to be accepted by their parents. Wars were still happening. Demigods still died. Things might look completely different for them in a few years time. They could be drafted into another fight. They could lose each other. Again.
But they had found their little pocket of peace. The place and time where they could stay. And be happy. Because yes, they were happy.
He sat, side-by side with Leo, looking out at the sunset going from orange to purple to black. He wrapped his arm around his husband’s shoulders. The love of his life. His everything.
He was happy. Despite everything, he was happy. Jason was happy going to work every day, facing whatever there was to be faced, knowing he would come home to Leo at the end.
Jason looked into Leo’s eyes. Leo’s sparkling, dazzling eyes. The freshly-born stars reflected in them as the sky darkened to night. He watched them twinkle in those pupils as they shifted, busily scanning the sky for gods know what. He knew that he was happy, too. They had each other.
Sometimes the fates could be kind that way.
Jason sat on the warehouse roof, watching the stars come out. And he knew, right then and there, that whatever happened, everything was gonna be okay.
- ⚡️ - 💍 - 🔥 - [ L+J] - 🔥 - 💍 - ⚡️ -
Fuuuucckkk this took me ages to write but ohhh my gods-
This is now my longest fic ever and I’ve been obsessed with it for months.
Footnotes/Things I wanna talk about:
One day I realised “Hey, wait! I can make them get married!” And two months and 15K words later (I started writing this on Jason’s bday) here we are.
Penny, Leo’s apprentice- would you wanna see more from her? I know fics with ocs don’t do as well, but it will still mostly focus on Valgrace. I love the idea of talking about my otps from an outsider POV, I can expand on more lore for this universe, and be able to show them just being adorable and cute and fluffy together. Maybe while Leo and Jason are thinking more seriously about kids, Leo tries out his fatherly chops on his apprentice?
No we are not gonna mention Jason’s little “glitch in the matrix” moment back there. Nothing happened, what are you even talking about? [unless you think that would make a good fic to expand upon, I’d be prepared to take a dark route] Just pretend I added that in to explain away any plot-holes.
The “Jason wants to get in touch with his bio family and Leo’s a little sceptical” plot is something I’ve wanted to write about for a while. Particularly as Jason’s whole arc is about finding a place. They’re “The Lost Trio” because each of them are trying to find something. Jason’s trying to find who he is and where he belongs. Leo’s prepared to just settle for any place that won’t shun him for who he is. I fully believe that Leo is perfectly happy just the two of them, whereas Jason’s still on that journey of “what if there’s more of me out there?”. And Leo being Leo, he’d obviously help Jason with that, but he’d remind Jason that he would be loved no matter what, with or without a bio family.
Should I expand on that topic, write a conclusion? I left it a little open-ended and up to the imagination (and bc this fic is already 9k words long as I’m writing this and there are too many plotlines) but it would be something fun to follow up on, maybe giving it it’s own time to properly shine, and get down to the nitty gritty stuff. If the family is good to Jason, Leo would be happy for him but still a little bitter that he never got that chance. If the family is bad to Jason, Jason would struggle with what that means for him (he did a little bit of this in canon when he saw his mom’s ghost in BoO) and Leo would empathise with him, and reassure them that they’re still a family just as them.
I like to cite my sources, so here is the article I found about Ancient Greek wedding traditions in case you’re curious/need inspiration. It was an interesting rabbit-hole.
Also, a lot of this was inspired by @lavenderfairiez’s fic “All I wanted was you” so pls check that out.
Thank you to @xixovart for helping me with the Spanish. I am White As Fuck and British, and I get most of what I know of Latin American culture from In The Heights, so I apologise if I’ve gotten things wrong (I also used google translate for some).
I found I ended up making Jason speak Spanish a lot more than Leo- I feel like Jason is definitely more of an “endearing pet names” kinda guy, wheras Leo is the “fucking ruthless character assassinations” kinda guy. I also have this hc that Jason absolutely LOVES to speak Spanish to Leo, and does it at every opportunity. He thinks of it as “Leo’s language” and adores the fact that he can speak it now, because him and Leo are together, and that makes him so fucking happy.
Jason thinks Leo is just the best thing to ever happen to existence, and I love that.
Lot o’ thoughts about wedding vows, and the theme of promises for Valgrace and PJO in general. I’ve already made a post about it here
Leo is autisic. I feel like that had to be said bc it fuels a lot of my writing choices for this fic. Also I love it. Jason is so accommodating for his needs. They both look after each other and I love that for them.
I have WAY more where that came from. I have a timeline, a backstory, and, like, ten other fic ideas set in that universe. I have AUs of this AU. I have concept art. I have headcanons.
Please let me know what bits of this you enjoyed best, so that I can get a good idea of what to write next.
Page dividers made by me. I spent ages on them and I’m really proud of them so I might reblog with a few close-ups.
Tagging my usual fanfic/Valgrace peeps: @ottpopfic @ginnyluna @groverapologist @echo-stimmingrose @demigod-shenanigans @keefessketchbook @sleepyycapybara @imnoturfriend-im-a-swiftie13 @euryvices @123letsgobestie @kaleidoskuls @fairytalesociology @four-leafed-queer-gal @child-of-helios @green-tea217 @puzzled-pegasus @ollieisanerd @twomanyfandomshelp @lokiwiiiiiii @yoshuko-ew @keefessketchbook @frankzhang-appreciation-posts @frayna-of-the-hollow @via-rant @daonedaonlyskh @hadeslegacyhephgirl @siimplyapril @pjowasmy1stfandom
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, to everyone in the Valgrace community- any hcs or posts that inspired me. You guys are just the best.
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QUICK update on the end of tng season 1 since i didn't have time last night. yesterday i watched "we'll always have paris" and then last night we also caught "conspiracy" and "the neutral zone."
we'll always have paris: NOT as bad as i feared. i did think picard making eyes at his ex for 20 minutes while her husband was dying in sickbay was kind of shitty of both of them but i REALLY liked the time distortion. it was soooo spooky and cool the elevator thing genuinely wigged me the fuck out
EVERY time picard tells data to stop talking i want to kill him <3
i'm surprised beverly didn't have a moment at the end where picard like offered her a kind word or something to help her with her Problems this episode but actually all she did was tell deanna she didn't want to talk about it and that was the end. ik it's doing her dirty but i actually respect her for that. none of anybody's business. i wish she'd stop crushing on picard though i feel like she could do better
anyway data's big moment at the end was very cool. i trust him so much he's my best friend
conspiracy: bugs bad. ohhh my god i can't believe none of you warned me
anyway it's weird because this should have been the season finale, given that it was brought up multiple times previously. or maybe only one time?
also love and light captain picard is the DUMBEST bitch on the face of this earth or galaxy or whatever. what part of KEEP IT A SECRET did he not understand...first he told deanna dnt hen will and then his ENTIRE bridge crew and then he went to confront the bad guys directly! yes it worked out for him but sir what the fucj
i did like that starfleet guys were basically getting hullened. killjoys i miss you. liked it less that there were BUGS.
i LOVED the riker fakeout but unfortunately i was hiding my eyes during that part because again, bugs
were walker and wesley's dad and picard like the three musketeers of tos...was this the implication...man that sucks. i would have actually been interested in that relationship if they had bothered to comment on it at all
VERY exciting to see a vulcan again!! so unfortunate that he was hullened.
anyway, for the buildup it got the actual resolution felt anticlimactic and very easily solved and it WASN'T EVEN. the season finale. whatever, tng
the neutral zone: WE'RE SO BACK. i like how this whole episode was an excuse for the romulans to be like lol we're back. that's an extremely bad and dumb premise but good for them
love that worf is anti-romulan. sorry about your parents king
those frozen bitches made me so mad. well just that one guy. i wanted picard to give him the business so bad. like when mike threw that fork in the bear. i don't even like picard and i would have been cheering him on. unfortunately he did not yell at the capitalist. even when the capitalist SNUCK ONTO THE BRIDGE.
guy with a southern accent did a good job. too good. don't like that
i felt the worst for the blonde woman bc she didn't ask for this but picard to will was like i need you to keep these people under control and he didn't and then he said to deanna i need to to keep these people undercontrol and then love and light she just hung out with this lady all episode. then when he was like (to security) gyet this man off the bridge they just stopped and stared at the romulans. what are we fucking doing on this ship
anyway even for all that data was right to revive them i can't believe so many people were incredulous that he wanted to do the compassionate thing and rescue a derelict vessel with human beings aboard. i thought starfleet was all about that shit?? jesus christ
anyway we are about to do "the child" and the summary looks bad so pray. pray.
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apologies if you’ve talked abt this before but have you read any of the voyager novels and if so do you recommend any/what were your thoughts? i like reading the star trek pocket novels for funsies but mostly only see ppl talking about the tos/tng/ds9 ones so i’m not sure where to start. thanks!
I highly recommend 'String Theory' - I'll tell you right now that I don't usually actually READ Star Trek Novels; I just find ones where Tuvok is mentioned a lot and then search the novel for words like 'Tuvok' and 'Vulcan' and read those bits. However, 'String Theory' was different in that I found myself actually invested and reading parts of the story that didn't concern Tuvok! I thought the characterization was very good. It also has this scene which I drew fanart of:
'Catalyst of Sorrows' is another one where I began just searching for instances of Tuvok but actually started paying attention to the story. However, I've read much less of it than 'String Theory'. That being said, I do want to get around to reading more one of these days! I don't think this would count as a VOY novel though because I think Tuvok is the only Voyager character in it? The other characters that I noticed/remember were Sisko, Selar, and Uhura. I like 'The Incident at Arbuk' I found the aliens cute and funny, my husband joked that they were 'antpilled beetlecels' and I remember smiling a lot while I was reading it - I remember Neelix's characterization being very fun! I've always liked his early season edge and I wished they'd stuck with it more - where he's a bit more devious and irritated by Voyager's crew. This is one I'd definitely like to read fully, even more so than 'Catalyst of Sorrows' since I like the goofier parts of Star Trek! It's another one I'd recommend! I'm also interested in (despite it being serious) 'A Pocket Full of Lies' because of the Janeway-Tuvok interactions. I don't know anything else about that novel so I can't tell you if the overall story or characterizations are good, I just know that the Janeway-Tuvok storyline within it seems heartbreaking! Uhh 'Pathways' is one I think is pretty popular but I've only read Tuvok's part in that and the writing didn't make me want to read the others'. From what I read it feels like there might be a healthy dose of 90's-Writing[tm] where it's sort of boring and kind of sexist. (But again, I haven't read all of it so that's not a definitive statement!) Those are all the ones that've stuck out to me so far! I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help!
#Q&A#emilinqa#I don't think I'd ever read a star trek novel that didn't have Tuvok in it and I haven't read ANY cover to cover#so I'm not the best consultant v_v <- me bowing my head in apology#WELL I'd probably read about Michael or T'Pring#but all of the novels I've come across with T'Pring in them make her evil so v_v
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Sorry - should have said "essentially this poll." This was... I dunno, time has lost all meaning, right around the time that California eased off mask restrictions, whenever that was. Last year? Two years ago. ??
So this is pretty much the only picture I can find that is supposedly of both Harve and Carole Bennet. Her professional name is Carole Patricia Oettinger but that doesn't bring up any pictures either.
Harve Bennett may be more recognizable in these pictures though:
Harve Bennett was one of the writers and producers of Star Trek 2 - 5. His IMDB page. He was involved with Star Trek the motion picture but in a smaller role. Credits for Carole are hard to come by. She was primarily a casting agent if I recall correctly but if memory also serves the other way around she did also work, uncredited, on the production. I'm fairly certain I've run into pictures of her doing work on the set. Just can't find them.
She eventually left Hollywood and went into a different profession and ended up in my hometown. And we live close enough together to at least once have ended up at the same shopping center together.
And as she is going back to her car, she sees mine next to it:
And she gets a kick out of my License plate, the powered by dilithium stick on, and the Vulcan Salute magnet which has since come off.
Which is fine. I'm still trying to get things like dog food and reciepts in order anyway and I enjoy trekkies getting a kick. So I slow down to give the couple time to laugh about it and appreciate it and after they walk off I'll move on. No problemo.
But then she comes and knocks on my passenger window. And I'm having my paranoid moment and social anxiety and mask worry and trying to make a machine work under pressure so it takes me a few minutes but I roll down the window and she says hi. And I say hi. And she says she loves the car and asks if I like Star Trek and I say I'm a trekkie.
Then she asks me which my favorite movie is. And I say that's tough. It's hard to pick a favorite. And she urges me to anyway. So I say that If I had to, it would be The Voyage Home. And she stares at me blankly. So I say, number four. Still blank. So I say the one with the whales and she smiles big. And only at that point does she say her and her ex-husband made them and do I know who Harve Bennett is? That's her ex.
And I recognize the name because I had just watched some theory or other about how all the original star trek movies were essentially an argument between Rodenberry and Shatner on one side and Bennett and Nimoy on the other, pretty much swapping movies back and forth and that's a large portion of why the evens are good and the odds not as much.
So it's a big wow. That's so cool. Which she agrees, it is very cool.
And then she goes back to her car with her new guy and they drive off.
Which leaves me in my car thinking that's very cool... but what the hell do I do with that??
As far as I've heard she's still alive and still living here. But, you know, probably no chance I'll ever run into her again. Or if I do it will be in my wife's truck which is covered in Star Wars decals. So...
Yeah.
It was cool and also very weird and very brief and I still don't know what to do with all that.
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S3 EP14 (Whom Gods Destroy) in what way?- nevermind probably the killing way. Okay. Well-
Just go:
- “A medicine with which the federation hopes to eliminate mental illness for all time.” WHAT. That is certainly a way to start an episode
- Cory is either going to die or is not actually a doctor. Well according to Marta I’m right about the latter
- they fucking knocked Spock out! (His named autocorrected to spoon lol)
- oh wait so the ‘cure for mental illness’ thing was REAL?
- goddamn why’s he stand like that
- Scott and McCoy are so confused
- Stigmatizing mental illness by showing that all characters who have it are violent. I get this is set in a prison but this is the only time they show any explicitly mentally ill characters and it’s to show that until there is a ‘fix’ they should be locked away for the safety of the public, which is not a good message to put onto tv. That is my problem with this episode, it’s spreading of stigmas and stereotypes.
- McCoy immediately saying that something’s wrong, ‘that’s not my boyfriend’
- Garth’s fashion sense is… awful
- getting distracted by Kirk’s ass
- oh my god that’s the first time anyone’s really threatened to harm Spock (edit: that’s a lie. That’s just a lie)
- Making the group of inmates all noticeably alien to make them seem like separate or fictional beings
- This argument? Live Spock reaction:
- “What is your reaction, Mr. Spock?” “Well, I find it [the dancing], uh, mildly interesting and somewhat nostalgic, if I understand the use of that word.” “Nostalgic?” “Yes, it is somewhat reminiscent of the dances that Vulcan children do in nursery school. Of course, the children are not so… well-coordinated.” Spock danced as a kid
- Kirk does not want her. Also he’s gay and one of his husbands is right there.
- “A dream that made Mr Spock and me brothers.” I think this is the first time Kirk and Spock refer to each other as anything other than friends… fascinating
- “Blind! Truly blind. Captain Kirk is your commanding officer, and you are his subordinate. And that is all.” Yeah but they’re husbands. Also this feeds into more of the ‘Kirk is designed to be a lonely character’ thing. He can’t even have a connection to his first officer :(
- damn they didn’t even let him infodump
- “No, thank you, I prefer to join Mr. Spock.” Yeah you would
- THEY HAVE AN ELECTRIC CHAIR ?!?
- I think the governor character is a stand in for McCoy, but they decided, ‘I guess we’ve tortured him enough’
- He’s sleepy
- And they’re kissing (edit: not sure who this is referring to)
- It’s always about getting to a control room and taking down a force field and never about kissing your boyfriend
- Spock coming to Kirk’s rescue? He finally got his knight in shining armour moment
- That’s not Kirk dammnit. He would never let Spock stay- oh wait it was Spock who was the imposter. Okay but where’s Spock
- Kirk’s little curl <3
- Kirk gets fucking shot. Second time he’s been knocked out this episode
- “You could serve as human sacrifice, for example.” “No, I wouldn’t enjoy that at all.” I love when they write Kirk as polite but obviously he’s got that Spock/McCoy sass rubbed off on him
- Kirk must be so disoriented. He got shot with a phaser and wakes up being held in a very uncomfortable position. Then he’s getting dragged places and beat up again.
- WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS EPISODE. No. No. What the fuck. They just made her choke on gas and then blew her up. This is horrifying. I swear some of these episodes are on the level on horror movies
- It’s funny how Scott and McCoy are getting along (and running the ship together)
- oh okay Spock’s just been chilling
- DOUBLE NERVE PINCH
- OKAY Spock ACTUALLY gets to save his husband in distress this time by being the knight in shining armour
- Once again Spock does not solely abide by pure unemotional logic, he does not fuck around, but he does find out. He’ll get you.
- THEY DID NOT PULL A ‘which is the real Kirk’ ON SPOCK
- which ones got the bigger ass- who said that (edit: I do not remember writing that but it’s genuinely the best thing I’ve written)
- HE DECIDES TO WAIT. HOT GIRL SHIT
- Spock isn’t turned on at all during this fight
- HOT GIRL SHIT IS SHOOTING THE INTRUDER PRETENDING TO BE YOUR BOYFRIEND WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT
- The thing that turns on and off the force field is literally a switch that says on and off and is labelled ‘force field power’
- yay they win or smt
- ‘Why’d it take you so long to know it was me?’ ‘Well in simple words, captain. I didn’t want to shoot my fucking boyfriend.’
They cured mental illness… We’re done for tonight.
Masterpost
Teleplay by Lee Erwin
Story by Lee Erwin & Jerry Sohl
#star trek#star trek tos#star trek the original series#spock#s'chn t'gai spock#tos spock#leonard bones mccoy#tos bones#tos mccoy#captain james kirk#james t kirk#tos kirk#montgomery scott#tos scotty
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Shipping Experiment– Spock
Pairing: Spock x reader (gender neutral)
Warnings: involuntary drunkenness
Words: 3686
A/N: I got this idea when I stumbled upon a BTS picture of the AOS movie productions. Then I discussed it with @cleversturmhond and decided it had to be written. I know the pic is for AOS but can be read for TOS as well.
Please do not repost my work on other sites or platforms!
-
Being an Ensign usually meant that you couldn’t go on many away missions. So it was always something very special for you to get chosen. You only hoped that your husband had no saying in it because you wanted to be chosen because of your skills and not the fact that you were married to the Chief Science Officer and First Officer of the ship. On the other hand, if it had been Spock’s idea to take you on the mission, it probably had a logical reason, after all he always claimed that he did not make emotional decisions while on duty. Maybe you could ask him later on who had had the idea to allow you to come to the mission.
For a reason you were surprised to learn that the aliens that lived on the planet were very friendly because so far you had usually only heard stories of how the landing party had been almost killed or abducted by the inhabitants of the planet. The natives even invited you for dinner and the Captain immediately agreed. You on the other hand didn’t know if it was such a good idea to just eat foreign food, what if it was poisonous for you? Sure, Kirk claimed that the alien’s physiology was not that different from your own but it still was no guarantee that the food would not hold and unpleasant surprises.
Unfortunately, the meal tasted a bit bland but otherwise it was very good and you ate a lot, probably more than usual. They even served some kind of ‘dessert’, just that it consisted of a bitter drink. After the meal, you were allowed to watch some kind of welcome dance the natives did for you and also encouraged all of you to dance as well. To your surprise, even Spock joined them a bit later, but probably only because four of your hosts were pulling on his arms and trying to get him up and on the dance floor. With determined steps he came over to you, offering you his hand
“Do you mind?”
“I’d love to” you said, taking his hand and placing the other hand on his shoulder. When you had first seen what a skillful dancer he was, you almost couldn’t believe it. Even less that he had never taken dance lessons in secret and just seemed to be a whiz kid, like at everything else. Not that you minded though, it was something you loved about him, how good he was at everything or how quickly he learned if something was indeed new for him. You amused yourself very much and also Spock seemed to do so. But then you saw him smile at you and in shock you let go of him “What’s wrong’” you asked.
“What are you referring to?”
“Your smile, you just smiled”
“I do not believe I did. You must have imagined it”
“Yeah sure, let’s just deny it all as if it was a shame” you said, gently taking hold of him again to continue your dance. Probably you would have just forgotten about it, if his smile had not etched itself into your memory and made it hard to be forgotten. And it wasn’t just his smile, suddenly, he also leaned his forehead against yours and pulled you closer, letting out a small sigh. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Your definition of ‘okay’ is unclear” he muttered
“I want to know if you’re feeling as usual. Or if you think that something’s off”
“Nothing is ‘off’. I simply enjoy having you close”
“Well I take that as a compliment” you pecked his cheek. While some of the other crewmembers seemed to have had enough, Spock was still twirling you around, even more energetic than before. And at times you could have sworn to see a big smile on his face. Finally, the Captain approached you
“I didn’t know dancing made you that happy”
“What are you trying to say?”
“That you’re grinning like a Cheshire cat” Spock raised an eyebrow
“You are referring to the animal from Alice in Wonderland”
“Yeah. You have something of him right now”
“Is it true?’” he asked looking at you
“Yeah you have been smiling at times But that’s okay. As long as it means you’re feeling happy that’s perfect”
“I would not call it ‘perfect’. I do not like not being in control of my emotions” you had stopped dancing by now
“So what are we gonna do? Do you want to go back to the ship?”
“Perhaps that would be a good solution. Then I can extend my meditation period”
“And leave poor (Y/N) all alone down here?” Kirk said, patting your back.
“Or I can just leave with him” you said “I kinda am getting tired from all the dancing”
“I apologize” Spock said “If you wish to accompany me back to the ship you are welcome to do so”
“Perfect” also Jim gave a nod and so your husband and you left the place after bidding your hosts goodbye and requested to be transported back to the ship. On the way to your shared quarters, Spock took your hand and squeezed it. You checked the time “It’s only 2014 hours. Would you like to do something?”
“If you do not mind I would like to engage in meditation for some time”
“Right, you said that you’d do that. I’ll just be reading something then”
-
Two hours later, Spock was still in the bathroom for meditation. But unless most times he was talking to himself. With a sigh you got up and stopped in front of the door. Of course you knew he didn’t like to be disturbed and that meditation was private to Vulcans. Yet you gently knocked at the locked door.
“Are you okay?” you asked with a quiet voice but got now answer “Spock?”
“Yes”
“Sorry for disturbing you but you were talking and I wanted to see if you’re alright”
“I am” he said “Test Object Leonard... Time: 1.28 seconds”
“What are you doing?” you asked, entering the code to open the door. You didn’t know what to say when you saw what he was doing. He had rid himself of his meditation robes and was standing at the sink in underwear, a dozen or more of origami swans or folded boats, made from toilet paper were sitting on top of the sink. In his hand, he held your lip balm, which he obviously had used to write something on the mirror “Oh Spock” you said, not sure if it was a good idea to laugh “What’s this?”
“I want to find out how long it takes until the figures are soaked with water and unfold”
“Oh well… uh” you only knew one thing. This was not normal behavior for your husband “What about your robes?” he looked at the pile of clothes, something else atypical because usually he carefully folded and put his clothes away unless he put it in the laundry box (and even for in there he did fold them a little).
“I took them off so they will not get wet”
“Well okay” you moved closer and watched, how he launched a swan called Sulu and noted that it was soaked within 1.31 seconds before noting name and the time on the mirror “Come on, you can drown more toilet paper tomorrow”
“I do not drown it. It is an experiment”
“You still can continue it tomorrow”
“Then the conditions might be different”
“Shouldn’t something be tested under different conditions?” he looked at you then turned back to his ‘experiment’, putting the next thing into the water, this time a boat called Sulu. You had the impression that he had each a swan and a boat that were named after someone of the crew. When you checked the list, you saw that also your name was at the top of the list, making you smile. “Come” you said “You can finish tomorrow. I think you have enough data for today” you pointed at the mirror
“I am not done yet”
“We continue tomorrow. I’ll help you” he looked at you
“Then I can get started with the report now”
“Or we go to bed. It’s late”
“I usually write my reports at around that time”
“Yeah but usually don’t soak toilet paper figures in the sink either. Let’s go” he looked at you
“No!” he said, rather fiercely, making you wince
“Spock!” you insisted “I don’t know what’s wrong with you but you are not alright right now. So let me get you to bed or I’ll call McCoy”
“He will be off duty by now” he grabbed the next swan but you took hold of his wrist.
“I can just call med bay. I bet you’d hate someone else looking at you even more”
“I do not need a doctor, I am fine”
“Don’t you usually not use the word fine because it has no logical definition just like ‘okay’?”
“It does, I only tried to make it clear to you by using your vernacular” still he started a lecture of the different meanings of the two words, depending on the context. You sighed and gently tried to lead him away from the sink and to your surprise and relief he complied. As long as he was talking, you could get him back to your bed room and hand him his sleeping shirt which he put on without further ado. But then he was done with his explanation and the started behaving like a kid again, refusing to but on his pajama trousers and insisted he had to continue his experiment.
“No you don’t. If you go back into the bathroom, I’ll throw all your boats and swans into the toilet and flush them” he stared at you and his mouth fell open slightly. You couldn’t hide a grin
“I will make new ones” he said and left for the bathroom
“No!” you shouted and wrapped your hands around his waist, trying to stop him. But since he was stronger than you, due to his Vulcan heritage, he managed to walk to the bathroom anyways. So you let go of him and went to the intercom instead, contacting Med bay that they came to have a look. After all it was possible that his state could be dangerous. You were quite certain it had to do with something that happened on the planet, probably something he ate or drank. When you ended the communication, you saw that Spock wasn’t in the bathroom anymore. He also wasn’t in the bedroom either “Spock?” you called but you got no answer. His figures were still standing on the sink but you noticed that his lute was gone. With a sigh you started the computer on the desk “Computer, where is Commander Spock?” you asked, not wanting to search him. Besides, he could be everywhere.
“Commander Spock currently is in recreation room 3 on deck 5”
“Oh” you said and left your quarters hurrying there as fast as you could. The scene you saw did shock you but you still had to pull back to not start laughing. It was even worse than what you had seen in the bathroom in your quarters. Spock was still only wearing his nightshirts, boxers and was sitting on one of the tables, seeming to be tuning his lute. And of course he was not alone in the rec room and almost everyone was staring at him or you “Spock!” you hissed as you slowly approached him “What are you doing, honey?” you placed a hand on his arm
“I am not making honey” you rolled your eyes
“I can see that. It wasn’t a question. I meant you by honey”
“Why?”
“You’re not in a state to discuss this. Come, let’s go back. You still have your experiment to finish”
“I am off duty” he said trying out his lute again.
“Well then we just go to bed. Or are you hungry again? Just let’s get you out of here. People are watching” you said quietly. At that, his head shot up and he glared at the people in question and they were quick to look away or pretend to focus on something else. You sighed “Come on. We can come back when you put pants on” he looked down his legs “Yes, you’re only wearing underwear”
“That is not underwear” he gestured at his shirt
“Yeah. But this” you pointed at his boxers. Come” you offered him your hand but he slapped it away, putting a foot on his table and started to play on the lute.
“I would like to play you a song”
“You can do this when I’m in bed. Because I’m very tired” you faked a yawn “Then you can help me fall asleep. How does that sound?”
“As if you think my song is boring” he pouted and you shook your head.
“That’s not what I meant. But it is very calming. And it’s been a long day. Are you not tired?”
“I am Vulcan”
“That doesn’t answer the question” he didn’t say anything and you sighed “Fine” you pulled your hand back and gave a nod, walking over to the intercom to contact Med Bay again because the doctor had to come here and not your quarters. You probably didn’t’ have the strength (or will) to bring your husband back to his quarters. When you were done, you also contacted the Captain to tell him what was going on and to let him know that maybe Spock wouldn’t come to work tomorrow
“What do you mean by ‘behaving odd’? Is it a Spocksih odd we’re used of him or odd odd?”
“Odd odd. Unless he’s sitting on the tables in rec room just wearing his boxers and playing his lute each day”
“No, you’re right that is odd. When did he start behaving like that?”
“I don’t know. He went mediating when we returned. But maybe his smiles on the planet already had to do with his situation”
“Did you let McCoy know?”
“He’s got off, so I contacted Med Bay”
“Very well. Do you need help?”
“Are you already back?”
“Yeah, we all are by now”
“Oh okay. But no, I called for a doctor he’ll help me to bring Spock back home”
“Perfect” you turned around to your husband
“Oh fuck”
“What? What is he doing now?”
“No idea”
“How do you mean that?”
“Because he’s gone. He’s not here anymore”
“Do you need help searching him?”
“Only if you don’t mind”
“My friend and First Officer is running around the ship drunk and half naked. Of course I can make time to search him”
“Good” you quickly discussed where you would go looking (respectively that you’d ask the computer for his location again) before contacting Med Bay yet another time to let them know that you had lost your husband again. Then you went to the next computer to hear his location. As it seemed he currently wasn’t in a room but was still underway to wherever he was heading. That was if he had a place he wanted to go. As you followed his path, you stopped to ask a computer again and when you heard where Spock was, you sped up even more. He had gone to the Pharmacology lab and in his state you had no idea what he’d do and he could get himself killed if he did something wrong. When you arrived at the lab, two people of sickbay were already there, talking to your husband. “What’s going on?” you asked, taking your husband’s hand.
“Your explanations made me realized that something is indeed wrong with me. I was trying to find something against it” he gestured at two small vials in front of
“Did he take anything?”
“No, luckily not” the nurse said while the doctor ran a scanner over Spock
“Is he okay?”
“No” Spock replied, making you squeeze his hand. To your surprise he pulled you closer until your head was resting against his chest. Suddenly he let out a yelp and when you looked up you saw how the doctor had injected a hypo into Spock’s neck. At the same time as your husband you asked what it was and were told that it something that would help him calm down a bit. The nurse then continued explaining that everything was alright so far and he just seemed drunk. So you should just take him back to your quarters and let them know in case something happened. With a grin you shook your head.
“What did you do huh?” you nudged his arm, making him glance down at you
“I did not take anything”
“On the planet. But you couldn’t know. We all didn’t. Now let’s get you to bed and tomorrow everything will be better” also Kirk now arrived in the lab and was asking what was going on, whereupon he received a briefing from the doctor.
“And he’s fine now?”
“He’s always been fine. But (Y/N) should keep an eye on him, just in case. But I don’t think something will happen. I’d take some blood but I have the impression that in his state he will not allow it”
“What if you wait until the sedative you gave him works?”
“Of course we could but as far as I can see he’s fine. Just not used to being drunk. I only thought we could find out what put him in that state. Maybe we’ll have to take some blood if he gets worse which he shouldn’t”
“Okay, that’s great to hear” you said with a nod and when you saw, how your husband slightly slackened you took hold of his arm
“It’s starting wo work” the nurse commented and you tried to lead him back to your shared quarters which you only could when also Kirk took hold of him and helped you. Together you more or less dragged Spock back to your quarters and after asking if you could manage, the Captain left you. Spock pulled you to the bed, sat down on its edge and after you were in his lap, he embraced you tightly.
“Careful” you muttered “Don’t forget how strong you are and your thousand lectures about how you could snap all my bones just like that” he didn’t reply but nuzzled the side of your neck. “How about you let me get ready for bed and then we can lie down and cuddle until we fall asleep?” again he did nothing so you let out a sigh “Aren’t you tired?”
“Not very much. However, I wish to hold you longer”
“You can also do that when we’re trying to fall asleep?” now his arms disappeared and you got up, getting out of your clothes, when you heard the bathroom door close. “Please just don’t continue your experiment” you muttered as you put on a top for in the bed. You sat down on the bed, taking out a PADD to read an article before Spock returned but again he stayed in the bathroom. After fifteen minutes you put your device aside and knocked at the door but got no answer, so you opened it. You had to cover your mouth to not burst out laughing. He was cuddling his robes he had discarded earlier against his chest and was fast asleep on the bathroom floor. Of course you knew that you wouldn’t be able to bring him back to bed so you returned to your bedroom, got your blanket and spread it over him. For a while you stood there, looking down at him and considering if you should join him or spend the night in bed before you sighed and grabbed your pillow to lie down beside him as well.
-
It was one of the first times in your marriage that you woke up before Spock. But knowing he’d probably be awake any time, you waited for him with breakfast. When he appeared in the door frame you had to bite back a chuckle because you had never seen him so disheveled.
“Morning” you greeted, putting your PADD aside
“Morning, (Y/N)” he replied with a nod. “I cannot find a logical explanation why I have woken up in the bathroom”
“Because you fell asleep there. Bam, logic” you got up and walked to the replicator “Water or tea?”
“Then I cannot recall why I would have chosen the bathroom floor as suitable place to spend the night”
“Oh well I can’t answer that either. But I might have an idea”
“That is?” he asked, walking to the bed to put the blanket on it, of course folding it neatly before taking a new uniform from his wardrobe.
“You don’t remember?”
“I am not certain I understand what you are referring to”
“Well” you grinned, getting your own breakfast, “I guess I’d better tell you before Kirk surprises you with made up stories about your half-naked adventures in the rec room. Come to think of it, you might want to make sure he doesn’t find the video”
“Which video?” if he hadn’t been shocked before he definitely was now. The intercom beeped and Spock answered it
“How’re you doing, druggie?”
“I do not understand your reference”
“You don’t remember? Pity, I’d love to see your face. I could tell you everything but I guess that (Y/N) knows a few more details. In fact I’d love to hear the whole story. Anyways, I just called to let you know I pulled a few strings to let you take off this morning, Spock”
“I do not see…”
“And I don’t care. I won’t let you come to the bridge. Oh and Bone’s awaiting you in Med Bay he said” the call ended and Spock looked at you as if he was lost.
“It seems there something you should tell me”
“Yeah” you gestured at his chair “I know Vulcan got nerves of steel, not anatomically, but you might better sit before I start”
-
Taglist: @softsapphicideals
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Ok so a completely impartial opinion on the „Which primarch is best in bed" topic from a person who doesn't feel attraction to ANY of these Bois
Lion- 5/10. AND THAT IS NOT A BAD SCORE. Lion does what he needs to do and nothing more. His partner is always okay, he is always okay, nothing exceptional, but nothing to complain about. Perfect middle ground.
Fulgrim: 9/10. Hear me out here for a sec. Fulgrim would be perfect but he is overwhelming as fuck. If someone just wants to have a nice and wholesome vanilla time, Fulgrim will probably always bring some kinky bullshit to the table.
Perturabo: 4/10. Perty doesn't give a fuck about you. He's probably not even sexually attracted to anyone. Having said that, he's building sex toys for Fulgrim.
Jaghatai: 7/10. The Khan FUCKS. I would imagine it like Khal Drogo in the Song of Ice and Fire books. Nothing actually kinky per se, just like... Really rough vanilla. Which is great for some, not so good for others.
Leman: 7/10. Probably same as Jaghatai but more Viking flavor and he will lift his partner just to display his power.
Rogal: nope/10. Rogal is ace. Period. Leave him alone and let him build things in peace.
Konrad: The Night Haunter is a 3/10. KONRAD is an 8/10. When we are talking about Konrad as the sociopathic murderbatman, then no. No one wants that. But if we are talking about Konrad as the tactical leader, terror tactics user and justice enthusiast... Then yes. 8/10. He would be amazing. But same problem as Fulgrim.
Sanguinius: NOPE/10. Sanguinius. Is also. Ace. And all the blood angels too. (It's canon) He was too good for you anyway
Ferrus: 3/10. Ferrus is the stereotypical man. He only thinks about himself, his partner is never satisfied, never experiments, and his hands are cold.
Angron: 5/10. Would be the same as Ferrus, BUT he actually lasts long enough to do something.
Roboute Guilliman: 7/10. The opposite of Fulgrim. He is AMAZING and vanilla and cuddles, and nothing else. But hey. He's a good guy. Husband material.
Mortarion: 2/10. Stinky. Selfish. Probably lost the ability to enjoy it because of all the toxic gases he's been huffing.
Magnus: 8/10. Look. In my headcanon, Magnus is demisexual. It's very logical if you think about it. So he is rarely attracted to anyone. But when he IS. OOOOH BOY. He did his reading. And he's a shapeshifter. What else could you want? Only problem: Probably tries to use warp fuckery in bed like that one scene in Watchmen. Homeboy out here cloning himself so he can rail you while he's studying in the other room.
Horus: 8/10: Same as Roboute, only more willing to experiment.
Lorgar: 2/10. No. Just no. Never. In no universe. Stop.
Vulcan: 10/10. Yes. Just yes. Always. In every universe. He is amazing at cuddles, gives great hugs, but is also kinky and will support your kinks. Concerned about your well being and always asks for consent on everything. Best man.
Corvus: 9.5/10. Same as Vulcan, only he's probably a bit less cuddly. Sorry Corax, you get second.
Alpharius and Omegon only have sex with you so they can steal your wallet and identity. If you're okay with that, they are a solid 7/10.
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Tuvok:
Ok, first off: real world standards, he's not normal passing. Apart from the ears, he's just too autistic (sorry, "Vulcan" 🙄) to be considered "normal looking". He went to 1990s earth once and Did Not Pass as normal. But in universe, he would on the surface seem like a model Vulcan. And he is, kinda. But he's also so gd weird. (/aff)
Not even gonna get into how badly he wants to be Will Graham because obviously that's there too but we don't have all day. Anyway.
Obvs the emotions struggle is real as it is for any Vulcan worth paying attention to, if only because they were all only ever written by humans.
But also, tangential to him being Will Graham coded (but still separate enough) he is a total mind slut. You know how some characters will go "when I have a problem, I set it on fire" or shit like that? When Tuvok has a problem, he mind melds with it. Homoerotically if it's an option. Dude even got a mind std one time, despite the fact that's not even a thing.
And then whatever the fuck kinda thing he has going on with Janeway. Not even necessarily in a shippy way ("not romantic, not platonic, so devoted the lines blur") but like... not only is he unreasonably loyal to her but he does shit like not only letting her touch him whenever she wants but *deliberately offering her HIS HAND to hold* to comfort her when she needs it (reminder that hand touching is very intimate to Vulcans and can be likened to human kissing) and again, they're never even stated as romantic or anything, they're just friends and yet he is more loyal to her than he is to his own code of ethics.
Obviously part of all of it could be because Janeway (or possibly Kate Mulgrew) is simply Like That, she does do shit like tell her platonic subordinate "then be a good rat and find us the cheese" in a tone that makes me lose it, but it's not all her, Tuvok is also extremely not normal about it. I should submit Janeway too actually, I'll do her next.
Also, afaik Tuvok is the only crew member of Voyager (who makes it back) who had a romantic partner before the ship got lost in the Delta quadrant and remained loyal the entire seven years they were lost. I *think* Samantha Wildman also did but she's a minor character (so she could've been getting it off screen) and she started out pregnant so once born Naomi both kept her busy and was a living reminder of her husband's love. So in that regard, Tuvok is very much not normal but like in the most positive way. He literally didn't cheat on his wife even when his life was in danger (they *were* out there for seven years so of course he hit pon farr eventually) and I think that's really cool of him. But also very not normal.
I'm very tired rn but once the polls come out, simply check out the blog of Bea bumblingbabooshka (wanna clarify, I'm not him but he is THE Tuvok blogger in my opinion) who has written much on this already.
There's also the whole stuff that happened around his monestary era but I'm not even at that part yet but it must've been wild.
Anyway. Vote Tuvok
Jekyll:
he can't remember the last time he slept. he hates himself so much he literally used mad science to create an entire ass guy to blame his problems on but accidentally made it so he can never be truly happy because uh oh! the silly magic mountain dew turned that into a man! now he can't fuck! whoa!
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