#he would still want to buy things for her instead probably play the role of some rough tough alpha male

[comfortless]

would König ever agree to be a sugar baby? 🤔 most people write him as the rich one in the relationship so I'm curious if the dynamic can be reversed

you’re calling to my weakness of König being taken care of for once here…!! cue König being the absolute worst sugar baby that has ever existed (lovebombing!). implied age gap (König is maybe 24-26 here, reader is anything above), porn mention, masturbation, slightly suggestive but mostly fluff. minors do not interact.

Begrudgingly, a younger König probably would.

He isn’t sure how these relationships even work. There’s plenty of money in his bank accounts, he’s got a decent enough apartment, a car, (some) clothes that aren’t riddled with holes or tears... Hell, there isn’t even really anything that he wants. His curiosity only begins to spike the second his thumb stops its scrolling, lands on a picture of her, and his world comes to a grinding halt.

The woman in the photo is the most gorgeous, sweet creature he has ever lain eyes upon. Just the image of her smiling softly at the camera, her hands placed in her lap whilst she’s seated on a couch is enough to send his heart hammering. She doesn’t look the part of some vapid, cruel thing he had anticipated on a site like this. No, the woman only looks gentle, her eyes are even a little sad… She's all alone, her bed is cold, and König is already hard at the thought of how this could go if he had just a little luck in his corner.

He makes the decision to message her without thinking. It’s late, she probably wouldn’t even see it until morning, and he doubts a woman this cute would want to bother with him anyway.

A polite, articulate: hey do you wanna fuck

Followed by: you don’t even have to pay me XD

He settles for pulling up some porn video with the faces just out of frame, jacks off to the hypothetical of it being she and him one day and falls asleep with his phone on his chest and come stains in his boxers.

There’s nothing about him that’s deserving of this woman’s time nor her response, but he wakes to the chiming of his phone and a sweet message from her anyway. One in which she asks him if he would like to meet for drinks so that they can talk, she clarifies that she will pay, and even tells him that she thinks he’s handsome.

Handsome. Something only his oma had called him when she patted him on the cheek as a boy.

His response is insistent, demanding almost, when he suggests that she come to him, meet immediately that same day. Who cares if it’s only afternoon by the time she arrives, he could go for a beer and a sweet, tight pussy at any hour, doesn’t hold himself back from telling her this either while he grins at his phone like he’s possessed - all teeth and wild eyes.

There’s a part of him that believes this woman will be scared off, stand him up entirely and block his account, but to his surprise, she does actually show up. She’s there before even he arrives, seated in a booth at the back of the bar with his order and her own placed neatly on the table in front of her.

His chest feels too tight when he places himself across from her, all cockiness diminished in light of something he hasn’t felt since he was two feet shorter and more than a decade younger.

He’s fucking petrified.

His to-be-sugar-mommy eases him with her softspoken voice, going over the less than rigid terms of their agreement and praising his looks as well as his ability to handle his alcohol.

She isn’t asking for sex, just someone to care for. She tells him that he’s beautiful, while he feels like a smear on the pavement in comparison to her. And fuck. He isn’t handling his alcohol well at all, he’s just nervous and needs to keep his hands and his mouth busy, because all he wants to do is bend this adorable woman who compares his ugly face to that of an archangel’s over this table and fuck her like a stallion, spit such filth into her hair that no amount of repentance could ever make her feel clean again.

He can’t. He can’t when she suggests in that same cooing voice that she take him shopping for boots that are less scuffed, offers her hand to him as though it’s natural for a lady so ethereal to tether herself to a beast. Her hand is so dainty and cold, whereas he feels like a boiler on the cusp of bursting the second their fingers slot between one another.

His head is a mess of thoughts, memories of being dragged by the collar to attend services with his oma where he never prayed. Shit, maybe he should start, because surely he has someone or something to thank for this, for her.

Their first date becomes the strangest ordeal of his life as she seats him on a bench and helps him to try on boots as though he were only a boy who didn’t yet know how to tie his laces. She even kneels before him and ties them up herself before placing his foot back on the store’s floor; doesn’t even comment on the obvious hole in his sock or the awkward, longing way that he’s staring at her, only presses her chin to his knee and smiles up at him with so much affection he thinks he might actually pass out for a moment. She buys the ones he likes, three pairs of them, and doesn’t even bat an eye at the price.

That’s when he decides it’s all too much: he tells her that he can buy his own stuff, that he doesn’t need her to do it or tie his shoelaces or anything because he’s a man, after all. He should be showering her in flowers and soft dresses, paying for her nails and hair dye.

His lady only laughs and asks if he wants to come home with her, he doesn’t have to stay, just sit with her for a bit. So… he follows her home like a sulking shadow, hovering just behind her lost entirely in his head. He had barked at her like a rabid dog and she still brings him back to her place, strokes her thumb against the back of his hand, offers him little smiles of assurance when he goes completely silent.

He wants to hate it, wants to tell her something dirty and toss a stack of cash her way when she opens her door for him. Instead, he finds his head in her lap while she pets his face, running the tips of her fingers over every scar.

Her compliments are the most ridiculous, beautiful things that he’s ever heard, ranging from outright calling him her angel to telling him that he’s charming, that the scars are pretty… He loves every second spent with her like this, with each soft brush of her fingers as they pet the top of his head down to his neck, the way she hums some pleasing song to him when she massages at his shoulder.

He’s never been pampered or coddled like this before, and it feels good. The boner threatening to tear its way out of his pants isn’t something he’s proud of this time; he only wants this sweet little fairy to feel as comfortable as she’s making him.

Maybe he could do that if she let him pull up her skirt and make love to her: he could be gentle if he tried, play with her hair and her clit while he slowly spears her open until she’s pliant and panting, take it slow until she comes around his cock and her pussy calls him to utterly defile it as well as the rest of her. There wouldn’t be a part of her left untouched.

When she asks to be held instead, he swears he’s getting all of that and then some: she puts herself right in his lap, her chest to his and her legs parted just enough to straddle his hips. Her head tips forward against his shoulder as his fingers dance across her back, squeezing at her hips before smoothing back up her sides. She’s so soft… the most pleasing thing he’s ever touched, smoother than gunmetal and the flat of a blade. The way she smells is even sweeter, like spiced tea and blooming flowers.

She doesn’t even slap him when he bucks upward against her pussy, grinds the throbbing bulge in his pants against the place that she’s warmest. No, she only kisses his cheek and tells him what a wonderful day she’s having, what a gentleman he is even if he knows that part is certainly a lie.

Her breasts are soft in his hands when he finds the courage to squish them, against his cheek when she guides his head down to her. She pets his hair, tells him how she’s always wanted to hold a man like this… that she’s been waiting for someone exactly like him for longer than she even knows.

She even laughs when she asks, “You think that I’m pathetic, don’t you?”

All thoughts of just getting a good fuck out of this woman die someplace beneath his skull. Who would ever even think to call someone so lovely and kind pathetic? He couldn’t imagine it, couldn’t imagine ever doing anything more than protecting her fragile little heart and letting her stroke at him like an overgrown kitten, not anymore.

“Nein… no…”

He swears he could almost see tears in her eyes when she shoots him a glance then. Appreciative, contented tears that he prays she won’t shed. He’s a man, he’s not going to cry, but… fuck, he might if she did right now. Everything feels so doughy and warm, cotton candy and summer rain when his grip around her tightens to pull her in even closer.

She wipes away those unshed tears as she nuzzles against his cheek, slowly rubs her nose there and leaves a trail of kisses up to his temple. His mind is devoid of anything but outright infatuation, some impromptu dedication. He would tell her right now he loved her and know wholeheartedly that he meant it, but love isn’t in the agreement.

His lady only just wants to give herself away for nothing in return, not for a dick to make her cry or his own money layering her pockets; she just wants to pretend he’s her own personal angel, bury him in all the love and gifts she’s never been able to give to anyone else.

He watches her when she falls asleep curled up in his arms, takes in the way she smiles even in dreaming when her soft breaths break up the quiet. He presses his mouth to hers until her eyelids flutter and her breath catches in her little throat. She wakes to the kiss and only reciprocates it with the same softness she’s displayed with every prior action.

Her lips part to take him in, and she doesn’t even moan when he laps into her mouth with a grunt. There’s no lust in this for her: only the most senseless adoration, all love and tenderness, the things he’s yet to properly learn.

She tastes like vanilla and honey, her tongue yields beneath his own… and finally he pulls himself away, staring into her eyes like he might find a treasure there, as if he wasn’t already convinced that every part of her wasn’t something divine and holy.

“Do you have any others?,” he asks, devoid of any trepidation.

There’s not a care in the world of how she might view him. He’s convinced, certain that whatever he’s feeling has to be mutual. There are butterflies fluttering like the gentlest tornado in the pits of his stomach, and just by the wounded look she gives him then he just knows she must feel them too.

“Only you.”

“Gut… gut.”

There’s another kiss, one that is initiated by the both of them and steals all breath from his lungs. It’s not her harboring tears this time, but him who feels the dull sting, separates from her and turns his head away to rub at his face. He knows that he’s the pathetic one now, burdened down with the thought that he’s head over heels for a woman for just treating him as if he deserves anything at all.

Damn her for the way she readily reaches for him to pull him back in, to kiss at the outer corner of his eye and tell him in such a quiet way that she knows… In just a day she’s noticed him more than anyone, given more than anyone.

When he guides her back towards his mouth with a firm hand at the nape of her neck, could he really be faulted for whispering a confession? “Ich bin in dich verliebt,” spoken nearly inaudibly before he shuts her up with his lips over hers.

There’s no need for an answer, he knows the agreement had nothing to do with love. She wouldn’t accept his money in turn, but maybe a heart would suffice. He promises he’ll send her letters each time he’s deployed between mashing his mouth against her own, swears he will come running back to her when those greedy kisses slip down to her jaw. This sweet dove only laughs and squirms in his lap, tells him she would love to see him any time before he shushes her again.

Shouldn’t sweet things like this know not to feed a stray?

[acosmicbee]

Little Dancer

(Heads up! This is the fic based on my poll from a bit ago. If you didn't see it, this fic is going to be darker than the other stuff I've written! Please don't read it if you aren't comfortable! TW: References to underage prostitution, underage alcohol consumption NOTHING WILL BE GRAPHIC BUT IT WILL BE THERE)

You'd always admired the pretty dresses and costumes the grown up ballet dancers got to wear. They were sparkly and shiny and eye catching. Of course, now that you were older, you understood the duel purpose. One was to look beautiful on stage, to play their parts as they twirled and leapt and danced. The other was to attract customers.

You'd lived at the opera house for as long as you could remember, just another orphan taken in who had some semblance of movement. They taught you ballet, but not in the way you longed for. Not like the fancy dance schools nobles could afford to send their children to.

One of the ballerinas who had first taught you, as well as a mix of twenty other boys and girls, had told you one very important lesson. When you were old enough to take clients after shows, if they offered to buy your way out of the opera house and send you to a real ballet school, you should take it. No matter the cost of what they wanted in return.

You could still remember the hurt and pain in her voice, as she had to tell a group of children that 'almost anywhere is better than here'. She had been bought out by a noble a few months later, and just as quickly replaced by another ballerina who continued the dance lessons. You never saw her again.

˖ ݁𖥔🩰˖୨୧˖ ݁🦢𖥔 ݁˖

You both counted down the days and dreaded the coming of your fifteenth birthday. That was the cutoff where the opera directors would 'allow' you to take your first clients after shows. Allow was a bit loose considering they practically forced the ballet dancers into it, taking a cut of whatever the nobles paid to get up close and personal with their favorite dancer.

Soon enough you'd be one of those people, forced to entertain men four times your age with a smile. Forced to sit pretty as they treated you like an object, some pretty little thing to just be ignored. Then, when they needed you, their hands would-!

No. No, you couldn't afford to think like that. You had to tune out the thoughts, the same way you tuned out the sniffles and cries of some of the other people in your bunk room. Thinking too hard was dangerous. It was painful and it was forbidden as far as you were concerned.

Instead, you focused on your makeup in one of the cracked dressing room mirrors, touching up any kind of fault. Today was another performance, each one marking a day closer. From now, and for another week and a half, the opera was doing Swan Lake.

You had a small role, but one still coveted by other dancers. After all, you didn't get paid if you couldn't pass the audition and get a part. You were one of the swans, just another faceless person wearing white, dancing in unison.

You didn't mind though, dancing your best and taking your bows at the end. The second it was over, you dashed off through the wings back towards the bunk room. The dressing rooms would soon be overrun with noblemen who had too much money and too little care for who was over 15 or not.

You had almost made it when a hand grasped your arm. Your breath caught in your throat as you turned, your eyes wide. The man holding you was definitely a nobleman, he was wearing a nice suit and crisp white gloves. He scanned your face before finally releasing your arm. "You did well, little dancer."

All you could do was stutter out a weak 'thank you' as you turned, making your way towards your shared bedroom. The area he'd touched felt like it was on fire and you rubbed it as you finally shut the door behind you. The way he'd looked at you... didn't feel normal. But he was probably just looking for whatever dancer he was sponsoring.

Thinking was dangerous, especially when it came to strange noblemen. Just be happy nothing happened Y/N. Get changed, wash your face and sleep. Nothing happened.

˖ ݁𖥔🩰˖୨୧˖ ݁🦢𖥔 ݁˖

He was there again the next night. Your legs were sore and aching after your bows but you'd still tried your best to be fast as you made your way through the dressing room. He'd caught you yet again, a gloved hand on your wrist as he studied your face.

Whatever he saw had a dark flash of emotion go through his eyes before he finally released you, a dark smile painting his face. "Great work, little dancer."

You could feel how his eyes never left you as you darted off towards your room. Could feel them burning into your back before you ducked around a corner out of view.

It became a pattern. Every night he was there, waiting for you. He easily picked you out from the other white dancers, easily caught your wrist as you tried to make your escape. Every night he'd whisper some kind of praise to you, always calling you 'little dancer'. Every night he'd release you, watching as you ran off before the dressing room filled with more noblemen who would be less willing to let you go.

Eventually Swan Lake came to an end and the next ballet, Giselle, started up. You didn't have a part in it, which was a great misfortune when you started to run out of money rather quickly. You couldn't even afford new ballet slippers, dancing as best as you could in your old ones.

It was sheer luck that when auditions were held for the next ballet after the current one, Cinderella, you managed to get a part. You were cast as one of the fairies the fairy godmother summons, a quick part with only one scene. But, it was your very first solo dance. Your very first performance where you weren't just another face in the crowd.

It would also be your first performance at 15, your first performance where you weren't allowed to hide away from the leering gazes of noblemen. Needless to say the closer you got to opening night, the more and more nauseous you felt.

You spent the daytime during your birthday in rehearsals. The pretty costume you wore as the fairy of spring feeling less and less special by the minute. One of the older dancers, the one playing the prince, offered you a few sips of brandy backstage before the curtain opened.

It dulled your nerves enough that you were able to make it through your solo without puking, twirling around the stage as you counted in your head to the music. Spin then leap then twirl then jump. You focused only on your body and the music, feeling a mix of relieved and terrified once you finished.

You sat in the wings for the rest of the show, nervously rocking back and forth as you waited for bows. The older dancers, ones who'd been taking clients for a long time, shot you pitied looks backstage. They offered you whispered pieces of advice when they had the time.

'They like it when you smile.' 'Stay in your costume, don't wash off your makeup.' 'If they offer you alcohol you drink it. It'll numb the pain.' 'Take any tip they offer you and hide it.' 'If they offer to sponsor you, never turn it down.'

Finally, just as bows finished, the ballerina who had played Cinderella took you aside. She hugged you close for a second before whispering a familiar piece of advice, one you'd never forgotten. "If someone offers to buy your contract with the opera, to take you away from here to a real ballet school or just to be a pretty face in their manor, take it."

You had barely made it into the dressing room, this time unable to escape the crowd of nobles and smog of cigar smoke and the other dancers flirting when a familiar hand caught your wrist. It was the same strange nobleman and he grinned down at you, a hand coming up to cup your face.

"Well done tonight, my little dancer. You were truly a sight to behold." He murmured, stroking your face. His words made your stomach drop. Never before had he referred to you as his, like you were an object to be owned. He gently took your arm, leading you away from the the crowded room of leering gazes to an empty room.

You held your breath, your heart racing. You felt naked in your costume, the pink and green fabric feeling not nearly thick enough to protect you. That was until your eyes widened in shock when instead of trying to undress you or touch you, like the other dancers had warned of, he draped his suit jacket over your trembling shoulders.

"Isn't that better, my little dancer? You're trembling like a dandelion in the wind." He said, settling down onto a plush chair. You just stood there, staring at him as you pulled the jacket closer around yourself. The fabric smelled of fancy cologne, the type you'd heard some of the male dancers lamenting over being nearly three shows worth of pay.

"Come closer, little dancer. It's hard to see your face from so far away when you perform. Every time I've gotten close you dash away like a little bunny." He chuckled. You reluctantly got closer, shivering with how intense his gaze was as it scanned over you. Whatever he saw in your defensive posture and trembling figure he must've liked because his smile widened.

"I have a... proposition for you little dancer. I have already talked to the opera directors about buying your contract." The words made you freeze. He wanted to take you away? You felt sick, even more than before but you had to remember the advice that had been drilled into you. If someone was giving you an out, you were to take it.

"What do you want in return...?" You asked, cursing the way your voice wavered with uncertainty and fear. After all, there was always a price, especially when it came to nobles.

"Smart bunny." He grinned, leaning a little closer to you. "Here's the deal. I'll give you the life you deserve. If you want to continue with dance I'll make sure you have the best lessons, that you can perform at a theatre where no one will ever make you feel unsafe. You'll be a sparkling jewel. In return, you will play the part of my child."

His... child?! That was... unexpected. Most of the deals you'd heard of involved romantic relations, not something like this. You were conflicted between a feeling in your gut telling you it was more complex than that and the lesson that had been drilled into you since you were a child.

In the end, all you could do was nod. This was probably the best deal you were ever going to get, your only escape from a miserable life of entertaining men for money. This was your way out.

It didn't stop your heart from stuttering at the wolfish grin that spread across his face as his eyes gleamed with something darker than happiness. What had you just agreed to...?

˖ ݁𖥔🩰˖୨୧˖ ݁🦢𖥔 ݁˖

You only felt free during your lessons. The man Your father had designed an entire room for you to practice your dancing in. He had costumes custom crafted for you, you outshone all the other dancers when it came to performances.

The second the lessons were over though, you could see the envy in the other dancers's eyes as they watched you enter the carriage he sent to get you. They didn't know what you had to give up for this, what you were still giving up.

He was a strict man, but more than that he was possessive. He liked owning things, owning people. Every maid and butler that worked under him was indebted to him in some way and he held it over their heads like a cruel god. His rules were harsh and his punishments for disobedience were harsher.

He owned a gramophone, something even few nobles could attest to with how new they were. He'd play music and have you dance for him, twirling around your practice room in a private performance.

He could be so harsh, but at the same time he could be so nice. He'd dress you up in the most recent trends, taking you to all the fancy parties he attended. He'd show you off, his precious child, and watch as the other nobles's faces contorted in jealousy when they realized he was the father of such a famous dancer.

You were never allowed to dance with others at these kinds of parties. Never allowed to go to any tea parties you were invited to by other noble children. Never allowed to go anywhere at all without an escort or your father accompanying you.

All you could do was push everything down and smile. After all, thinking was painful, too painful. Thinking about the future hurt just as much as thinking about the past. But sometimes, when you were all alone in your room at night, lying on silk sheets and a soft mattress, you wondered if this place was actually better than the opera house.

[mikachondria]

The Bats favourite barbie movies:

Dick - The Barbie Fairytopia series, entirely based on vibes. Forced each of his siblings to a marathon at least once. He's the biggest Bibble fan. One time his siblings gifted him a Bibble shower curtain and bathmat for his birthday as a joke but he uses both, because 1) he unironically loves it and 2) his siblings always get really exiting when they visit him and see, he hasn't changed them.

Jason - Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper, I will not elaborate. He's also a Princess and the Popstar hater because “They tried to rip off their own movie but somehow lost all the good parts in the process. Like yeah, give us two very privileged white girls in slightly different situations and compare it to the criticism of the social class differences in a monarchy.”

Yes, he gets defensive over it.

Tim - Barbie in the Nutcracker. One time when he was little, his parents couldn't come home on Christmas eve (I'm a Janet and Jack Drake slightly neglectful but still loving parents believer, they didn't forget him, their flight was just cancelled) so he searched up Christmas movies to watch alone. When his parents got home the next day they found him asleep on the sofa and the end credit scene frozen on the TV. They take him to see the real ballet a week later and after that, Barbie and the Nutcracker becomes a comfort movie for him. He thinks it's objectively not the best Barbie movie but the nostalgia just hits him every time he watches it. (When Cass got a role in the nutcracker ballet, he was so excited. She played a rat and loved the role)

Cass - Most people would probably think it would be a ballet related movie like Nutcracker, 12 Dancing Princesses or Swan Lake but it's actually Barbie as the Island Princess. She deeply relates to Ro growing up in isolation, struggling to adjust to society and speaking a language no one else understands, though Ro's story is much more lighthearted than her own. When Ro gets reunited with her mother, Cass cries every time because it reminds her of her own adoption and finally finding her place.

Duke - Barbie and the Diamond castle, again purely the vibes. He's convinced that Alexa and Liana are gay for each other and sees the guys as inconvenient plot devices (“They rode away from the princes on a literal rainbow bridge!”).

Also sometimes uses his powers to ride away on a rainbow bridge himself, just because he thinks it's funny. This is inspired by this post from @jello-jelly-coconut

Steph - Barbie in a Mermaid Tale. Partly vibes, partly because when she was younger, she sometimes wished to have a second life, a second home too just like Merliah, with a father who loved her and her mom instead of being absent/in jail.

She knows the lyrics and dance moves to Queen of the Waves by heart.

She also loves picking the illogical things in the movie apart (“The mermaids breathe underwater so they have to have gills, but they can also breath air, that means they are some mammal-fish hybrids which would make Merliah a hybrid of a hybrid”) but defends it with her life as soon as someone else criticises it because how dare they disrespect her favourite Barbie movie?

Damian - Barbie and the Magic of Pegasus. At first he refuses to watch any Barbie movies with his siblings at all, but agrees after weeks of them asking. He wants to watch something with a dragon but Barbie and Rapunzel is not available on any streaming platform at that time and they have to buy/borrow a physical copy so he settles for the next best thing, a pegasus. He has low expectations.

Then he sees Annika trying to adopt a polar bear cub in the first few minutes of the movie and immediately likes her.

He's hooked till the end and has to admit that he liked the movie.

He still refuses to watch other Barbie movies though, this time with the reason that they wouldn't be as good as Barbie and the Magic of Pegasus anyways so it would be a waste of time.

Barbara - Technically not a movie, but Barbie Life in the Dreamhouse. She always has a tab with the youtube playlist open and will watch episodes when patrol gets boring. One time she forgot to mute herself and got teased by the other batkids but then she started streaming the episodes for them on their phones during stakeouts and they shut up because they got invested. Bruce is not aware of this.

Barbara's favourite character is the closet.

Bruce - He's doesn't have a favourite Barbie movie (it's Barbie and the 12 Dancing Princesses)

Unfortunately I don't know enough about Kate, Luke, etc to assign them a movie but feel free to add to the list

[hopeymchope]

How well do you think Class 78 would handle being recruited into defending Last Defense Academy?

Fun mental exercise. Thanks for the suggestion!

(THIS ANSWER CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR DANGANRONPA 1, BUT NO SPOILERS FOR THE HUNDRED LINE BEYOND THE DEMO)

Makoto Naegi — He wants to believe that he's been recruited for something important, but everything about this is too weird and too fishy. But then he takes basically the same route to get there as Takumi does; when Sirei says that the invaders will go through this school and then destroy their homes, killing all of humanity in the process? That's when he feels like he can't afford to sit back. Because if there's even a chance his family is in danger, he has to fight for them.

Aoi Asahina — Jumps in with both feet on fighting the invaders. She's always been trusting and figures that even if the "last defense for humanity" thing doesn't pan out, then at least she's fighting to protect the rest of her classmates if nothing else.

Sakura Ogami — Has more doubts than Hina but ultimately would rather back Hina up and try to keep her safe, so she buys in and fights for that reason. Still... she's often asking Sirei tough questions and prodding at the edges of the academy, trying to understand what's going on.

Leon Kuwata — Retains healthy skepticism about this whole thing. Extremely hesitant to lay down his life for a cause he doesn't fully understand. Stories like Ultra Despair Hagakure and Danganronpa S have taught us that Leon really tries to approach things rationally. I think that desire for rationality and his overwhelming drive for self-preservation are going to keep him off the battlefield. And unfortunately, he's not going to be doing much good on the inside either. He doesn't have a clue how to investigate the place or have many talents that can serve the team; he's just kind of hanging out.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru — It never takes much to get him to listen to any supposed authority figure. Remember the way he caved in to Monokuma's morning exercises and even started calling him "headmaster"? If someone tells Taka that he has a responsibility to fight and possibly die to protect this place, he's going to do it; "responsibility" is his middle name.

Sayaka Maizono — After an initial freakout where she refuses to fight and just wants to get the hell out, eventually comes to the conclusion that she's probably done harder shit to gain/retain her fame than this, so she caves and fights. After all, if anyone's watching, she's going to need to step up in order to retain her positive standing among the public.

Byakuya Togami — Togami finds it extremely logical that he would be among those asked to be the "last defense for humanity" given his elite status, but he's still HIGHLY doubtful of the whole endeavor. He's not doing it. He will instead be researching the school and trying to figure out what's really going on here.

Kyoko Kirigiri — And speaking of researching the school... Kyoko disappears for extended periods of time while she goes off to investigate the truth behind the entire scenario. How did they actually get transported here, what the hell is Sirei, who are the "higher-ups" giving him orders, what is the true nature of these invaders and the bizarre "hemoanima" powers, etc? It'll be a while before she'll even consider joining any combat; she's VERY busy.

Mondo Owada — Mondo is quick to anger and violence, plus he feels a lot of responsbility to not only the Crazy Diamonds but ALL bikers across Japan. Sure, he's going to start out with threatening Sirei, but won't take much to make him pissed enough at the invaders to finally activate his hemoanima and get out there in the name of defending his homies. And besides, if his "bro" is doing it... he'd better be out there for Taka, too.

Chihiro Fujisaki — Like Hiruko Shizuhara, quickly dives into the computers and records found within the academy. As such, winds up playing a behind-the-scenes support role in the combat rather than actually going out and using a hemoanima. Sees themselves as too "weak" to contribute much in front-line combat anyway.

Hifumi Yamada — As much as he loves the shōnen protagonist vibes of becoming a super-powered anti-alien warrior, Hifumi's not really the kind of person to put himself in that sort of danger. .... At least not until they all learn about the fact that they can be resurrected by the academy's technology if anything happens. And at that point he's like "Well is it really any worse or harder than me staying awake for five days and nights in a row to finish one of my doujhinshis?" So he gives it a shot, hoping this is his chance to be a shōnen hero! Unfortunately, he will soon learn YES, it IS much worse/harder to physically fucking die than he expects. After one experience with that, it's going to be hard to get him back out there again....

Yasuhiro Hagakure — Of course he's not doing this. Come on. He's going to be busy freaking out for a good while, too.

Celestia Ludenberg — And speaking of characters who are absolutely, positively NOT going to be fighting... she might prove useful a few times by providing deceptive strategies to employ against the invaders, but she's not going to be doing anything out there herself.

Toko Fukawa and/or Genocide(r) Syo/Jack — Toko certainly isn't going to want to get out there and is going to be pretty shaken/angered by their forced recruitment, but I think she's eventually going to be overruled by her other half's bloodlust.

Mukuro Ikusaba — Lives for this shit, ofc. First in line to stab herself with a blade to unlock her hemoanima and go to town on invaders.

Junko Enoshima — This one is COMPLICATED. On the one hand, she was probably in the midst of planning her OWN death-dealing despair scenario ala DR1 or UTDP, so now she's of irritated that she got interrupted by someone else's weirdly similar scenario. On the OTHER hand, isn't it delightfully despair-inducing to have her own plans interrupted and pre-emptively ruined like this?? But then, what does she do within the scenario itself? It's certainly not in her nature to go out on the battlefield and fight. But it would probably be incredibly despairful to have to experience a violent death REPEATEDLY at the hands of bizarre, gigantic monsters. But also, wouldn't it be amazing to see the entire world destroyed and see everyone's despair as all their loved ones are slaughtered??? So maybe she shouldn't fight at all and try to ensure the others also fail. But wait; wouldn't it be more satisfying a form of despair if she DID fight the invaders with all she had and ultimately still failed to prevent it when they prove they are stronger than she is??? Then she could not only watch the despair of her classmates, but also experience the despair of her own failure! In the end I think she's going to play both sides a bit by totally supporting Mukuro and telling her to give her all against the invaders, but then she simultaneously will play the role of the fashionista who doesn't want to fight, keeping her own analytical skills out of the equation while she watches the slaughter from inside the academy. And her Ultimate Analyst skills are going to help her to ascertain the whole truth behind what's going on well before anyone else can. Knowing those dark truths first and then not telling anyone, not even her own sister, about what's actually behind all this... having to carry that knowledge alone... how despairful. And how delightful it will be when the rest of her classmates must face the despair-inducing truth...

[biblioflyer]

Nosferatu (2024) takes its Occultism at least as seriously as it’s cinematography.

Exhuming the Spiritual Assumptions

Spoilers ahead (naturally)

One of my guilty pleasures is The Exorcist Files podcast. I don’t really buy into its extremely Catholic spiritual warfare worldview. I am at least a little bit skeptical about the veracity of the stories being recounted. I am both Scully and Mulder on the occult. I find it endlessly fascinating and am very much willing to engage with believers seriously and respectfully but try as I might to develop any sort of consistent religious or spiritual practice, in my core I just don’t exist in the demon haunted world. I believe there are more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in my philosophy but it’s all so very ineffable to me instead of inerrant.

Right off the bat (or as Matt Berry would say: BAT!) that leads me to my first complication, caveat, and interpretation. Namely that the very heavily Catholic informed worldview of the Nosferatu setting may just be the framework that the characters are using to understand what is happening. This being a variation on The Dracula tale more or less played straight, the audience also would tend to bring that assumption with them. However! I think the role of Willem Dafoe’s character is to push back on the reflexive assumption that capital E Evil exists as a supernatural force therefore Christianity is empirically correct.

Nosferatu weaves around a couple of assumptions largely by neither proving nor disproving them. The trope of a Vampire being repelled by the cross for instance is never tested. The people living in proximity to Orlok’s castle clearly believe this but for all we know they are only situationally free of his power because he has no specific desire to hurt them. Same with hallowed ground. The priests and nuns believe Orlok cannot threaten them but is it beyond question that Orlok actually wants to finish off Thomas?

A couple of recurring themes in demonology are legalism and the need for witnesses. Orlok covets Ellen but his mind has become fixated on dissolving her marriage to Thomas and her willingly giving herself over to Orlok. For the most part the Abrahamic religions treat evil as something that must be chosen. A good many millennia of spilled ink, schisms, and even spilled blood has centered around the question of what it really means to choose and the definition of informed consent. For Orlok’s purposes Ellen seems not to have had sufficient agency to properly choose as a legal child in her society but he could court her until she came of age to be legally and metaphysically responsible for her choices. Alternately it’s possible age was irrelevant and he instead simply lacked the means to bring her to him or go to her until he established a connection with an occultist who had the resources to arrange everything.

Regardless, to some degree Ellen must have agency but Orlok can leverage her by threatening her loved ones including Thomas. Once he escaped the castle, Thomas was more useful as leverage alive and given the belief of the exorcists that Orlok still had influence over Thomas, Orlok may even have subtly pushed him to return home to make it easier for Orlok to locate Ellen if she continued to reject his overtures and collected herself enough to shut out Orlok as she had up until Thomas’ departure. Orlok certainly didn’t put a lot of effort into ensuring that Thomas was really dead and one interpretation of Thomas’s experiences with the exorcists is that Orlok would have been aware that Thomas was alive and could track him down in the material world if he really wanted to badly enough.

Evil’s Prime Directive: Likes, Shares, Subscribes

Which does bring me to witnesses. In Christian demonology specifically while Evil hates Creation generally and Humans in particular, destruction and ruin for its own sake is rarely a primary goal. So while Orlok as an alleged disciple of Belial in life and probable demon incarnated into a body (more on that later) desires to reap Ellen’s soul and brings along an army of plague rats for good measure, there is no point to any of this without survivors to bear witness.

Destroying isn’t enough though, the true objective is to get people to doubt the existence of a just and loving God. According to some like Father Martins of Exorcist Files fame, through a lot of hand waving the real real objective, as dictated by an all powerful God, is to use Evil to remind people that little sins lead to mortal sins and thus they should stay on the straight and narrow and remain under the protection of God.

This is where my inner Crowley would say “And you call me the bad guy!” while Aziraphale throws up his hands and says “It’s ineffable but it must be good, because God is good.” Which is how the formerly henotheistic Israelites and their descendants wind up quietly reintroducing dualism into their monotheism by retconning most of their God’s more wrathful deeds as having actually been the fault of a certain ex-prosecutor turned eldritch terrorist and his gang of personified concepts of wickedness and a few pagan gods who got laid off when their pantheons underwent consolidation and “right sizing.”

Ahem. Sorry. I’m being cheeky, I actually think it’s all very interesting and as a consequence I lose patience with people who don’t understand the history of their beliefs but not because I want to refute them but because how is it not fascinating?

So since Evil’s prime directive is to have someone acknowledge how cool and awesome it is, Orlok wouldn’t view Thomas as a loose end. If Orlok doesn’t need to kill Thomas, then Thomas would be in some sense an accidental missionary. While the Romani hunt vampires and try to warn unwary travelers, their apparent willingness to try to, if not mollify then bait, vampires is useful. Their belief in a supernatural evil and the specific customs they have developed to protect themselves also separate the Romani from more “sophisticated” people whose lack of direct contact with monsters and overt magic cultivates a sense of superiority over superstitious peasants. The maintenance of plausible deniability is also a practice attributed to Evil.

Up to this point I’ve tended to describe Orlok in largely stereotypical demonic terms. The reason being that Orlok presents very different in many respects from more traditional representations of Dracula and even the more bestial depictions of vampires. Orlok himself identifies as “an appetite” when Ellen questions whether he is even capable of love. You are free to read melancholy into this if it suits you to humanize Orlok. I myself view him as a being with very little humanity and is more of a set of base urges with the ability to develop somewhat sophisticated plans to serve those urges but there is little to nothing about him that is able to stray too far from his hungers.

There’s one other scene where I think you could argue Orlok shows a bit of humanity and it’s perversely when he’s being maximally petty. That being when he insists on being addressed as My Lord. As an alleged disciple of Belial, this has a metaphorical meaning and a literal meaning. Belial is an example of one of those concepts that got personified over time as subsequent generations translated the original texts and added their own flourishes. Originally Belial was a description. A slur even. It meant to be worthless. So Orlok in pledging himself to Belial has in some sense given himself a cosmic demotion when his earthly rank was count. Which he would have almost certainly thought was also a divine mantle.

Being a vampire seems like the sort of thing that might seem like a promotion but there’s a lot of suffering that comes with it. More so than the classic Stoker or Anne Rice version. For starters to the extent he is even still the same person, he’s Damned with a capital D and that is portrayed as sucking a lot in the Abrahamic framework. Just the knowledge that they can never be in Heaven or in the presence of God is supposed to be a torment but that tends to get deemphasized because it’s not as relatable a motive for wanting to ruin the world when the audience is flesh and blood and maybe asks uncomfortable questions about global floods and why have a fruit bearing tree if you don’t want people to snack.

So let’s remember why Vampirism sucks in other ways:

There’s an argument to be had about whether he’s a damned ghost haunting his body that hungers for blood as a condition of his continued existence: the feasting upon blood and his other comorbidities being the burdens he must accept for extended life. Life beyond death in an embodied state for humans being a fundamentally unnatural state and thus requiring sacrifice to maintain the equilibrium of nature. So he makes periodic blood sacrifices and in doing so, is alienated from society still further as if being a literal corpse that cannot abide the sun was insufficient.

My own feeling is that the glimpses of Orlok the person may just be the semi petrified remains of the memories in that body, a body being used by an avatar of the Deadly Sin of Gluttony. The vacated body of a former disciple of Belial being a compromised vessel but one that allows more exercise of power over the natural world by virtue of being so alienated from the natural world and obligated by its hungers and nature to confine its activities to a fairly limited range: it can do almost anything it wants towards spreading terror and ruin but can’t take a night off to enjoy a play.

This entity likely being a demon and not being capable of appreciating art or beauty for its own sake. Orlok or the entity wearing his bones didn’t fall in with the wrong crowd and vaguely saunter downward. Traditionally Abrahamic demonology doesn’t allow for demons who are merely just kind of bratty and ask too many questions, blurry lines between good and evil tend to invite a return to henotheism or, gasp, polytheism. A thing other Christians have been accusing those who pray to Saints of for centuries. This is not me implying Catholics are polytheistic mind you, I don’t have any stake in delegitimizing Catholicism and even if I did, treating polytheism as a slur wouldn’t be the hill I’d die on.

A Chronicle of a Dim World but Not Necessarily Pure Darkness

I did say though that I think Christianity was possibly not empirically correct in Nosferatu but rather the framework that everyone involved was interpreting things through. Everyone except Von Franz. Okay I’m just going to refer to him as Willem Dafoe from this point on because he’s such a Willem Dafoe character. He doesn’t automatically assume Ellen is crazy nor does he blame her for anything. His comment about how she could have been a priestess of Isis in another age I think is very revealing about where he draws his ethical lines. I think it’s implicit that he doesn’t think it’s Ellen’s fault a malevolent presence latched onto her when she seemed to have a natural gift for walking the spirit realm in dreams but absent any tutelage or cultural context for managing this ability.

By the Christian paradigm, Ellen has messed up big time and probably irredeemably. Traditionally it’s not good to have dissolved your marriage and pledged yourself to a demonic being whom you then perform a pseudo sex act with. The Abrahamic religions, as traditionally practiced, aren’t very sex positive when it comes to women nor is there much of a concept of spectrums of consent and coercion invalidating sexual and spiritual relations. Traditionally practiced is a phrase doing a lot of work and oversimplifying a lot when it comes to thousands of years and billions of practitioners. Norms obviously varied quite a lot across eras and regions.

Dafoe taking up her cat and staring into the dawn though is rich in hopeful symbolism. Cats got a bit of a bad rep in certain periods due to their tendency to be looked upon fondly by pagans. On the other hand, they were often looked upon fondly by pagans. They’re often portrayed as wise and associated with magic. Plus, and this matters in the context of a plague spread by rats, they eat vermin. If the bodies are piling up, stray cats are on the side of the angels doing their part for humanity one meal at a time.

Given how much Ellen adored her cat, one could say perhaps it’s invested with a measure of spiritual power and is more than just a symbolic surrogate for Ellen. Regardless, I think the context points to Ellen’s sacrifice being both literal and metaphysical. She sacrificed her life and also nullified her sins too. So Van Hellsing, I mean Von Franz may be visually representing a spiritual intercession where Ellen has been snatched away from the Pit.

To get a little Gnostic, Willem Dafoe may be basking in the light of knowledge. He’s seen behind the veil, made testable assumptions, and proven them. Ellen is being taken up to Heaven, Orlok is back in Hell, and Hermes Trismegistus is proud of his star pupil. Although this is truly Ellen’s tale and Ellen’s victory while Willem Dafoe believed in her and kept the well intentioned white knights from getting everyone killed by interfering with an unorthodox solution they’d no doubt object to on the basis that it was super icky. Although in their defense, I consider myself a pretty enlightened 21st century man but I’d probably try to talk my partner out of it and be a bit of a pest if she told me we needed to get divorced so she could shag a demon to death to save not just my life but the lives of untold thousands.

In the finest tradition of horror heroines, Ellen was a hard woman making hard choices and in sacrificing herself she took a groomer demon of pestilence and hunger with her.

And maybe, just maybe I’ve over complicated all of this and it’s just a metaphor for how bad women have it with online dating where the astral plane is the apps and Orlok is a creepy dude who becomes obsessed after an underage girl is nice to him once.

Epilogue: Again, with all due respect to the character, this would have been my humble suggestion for a hidden bonus track on the soundtrack.

[sleepymccoy]

Still thinking about a Star trek TOS Firefly au. So I'm gonna have fun writing it out.

I love the dynamic between Mal, Zoe, and Wash, so that's certainly becoming the triumvirate. Mal > Jim, Zoe > Spock, Wash > Bones. However Wash's job doesn't make sense for Bones so he's going to change to doctor.

Jim was on Tarsus 4 and suffered the same as in canon, famine leads to who lives lottery and he wasn't chosen but survived anyway. I think that makes perfect sense in the Firefly universe too, but I think unlike in trek Kodos is celebrated by the federation in Firefly for making tough choices and leading in a strong way. So he's not on the run, he's a constant background side threat who's still in power. The face of the federation in this version, but not the head of it. You feel me

After Tarsus, Jim and Bones met and became mates. I think Bones moved to a big fancy planet for his wife and child after a bit. In the meant time, we have Spock!

This got massive, have a readmore

Spock is the result of eugenic experiments (there's no aliens in Firefly 😢) like the serenity thing that the og story is about (but generational eugenics not brain poking)(because I want there to be many others, just also in hiding and with their own political factions and opinions) but his resulted in Vulcan-like stuff. I think he's still got the pointy ears and has excessively strong emotions that he's learnt to hide completely cos he was raised in a medical facility by cold scientists instead of parents and love. There's schools of thought about them, some want to integrate, some want them exterminated, some want them to form their own society. The federation stance is these eugenic things don't exist and if you see one kill it because it officially doesn't exist. So Spock is forced into hiding and hasn't really had a chance to form his broader opinion, cos it's academic anyway. They're all hiding now.

So, Spock's escaped (more on that later) and in hiding. He meets Jim and they click, probably meeting in some silly battle. I reckon Spock has ways to get away from the feds that Jim wants to learn, so Jim pushes for them to team up. They spend some time together either on someone else's ship or on a smaller ship just them two.

After a while that comes to an end and they put together a crew and buy a ship together. They hire Sulu and Chekhov who are a criminal team who need to get off this rock very fast please. Chekhov can fly wonderfully and has enough engineering knowledge that they're like hey we maybe don't need someone in the engine room!

Sulu is a jack of all trades. It takes a few months for them to realise how useful he is, he always has a skill they need and always knows someone who'll play as a contact. Absolutely invaluable.

Eventually the engine breaks beyond Chekhov's skill to fix and they've all heard of Scotty. Everyone knows about Scotty. I think this would make a good episode one.

They work Sulu's contacts and find Scotty who is, lo and behold, having a drink with his mate disgraced Doctor McCoy. Spock, immediate dislike, this guy is a doctor. Jim, holy shit! Bones! Why the fuck aren't you emailing me back!?

Turns out Bones has gotten divorced and threw a bit of a fit in a hospital and can't work on a core planet anymore. He agrees to join the crew and Scotty has some issue that forms most of the episode plot and joins too cos hey, crims gotta keep moving

The ep ends with meeting Uhura, who manages a lot of the residual resistance movement's comms. She's the most political of the bunch, but Jim is absolutely in agreement and so chuffed to meet her even tho he's never been too war-y before. Scotty and Sulu already know her. She takes a kind of Inara role on the ship, but she's not companioning, she's boosted the comms in the shuttle and is continuing this work. It's great for her cos she gets to move around and be hard to catch, and it's great for the ship cos it gives them access to loads of underground people who aren't the hated federation

I also think she helped Spock break out back in the day. I'm not sure if she was part of it and they've met, or if she helped run things so she knows Spock but he doesn't know her. She's gonna be their reason for getting accidentally involved in larger things in the story and why they get more altruistic with their jobs. Spock also pulls them into some of the eugenic stuff

I reckon episode two needs some Spock eugenic stuff to happen so that Bones can solidify himself as on team Spock in action even if he has a go at Spock. Cos everyone else follows Jim's orders and Jim is team Spock, so I think Bones needs a chance to prove it. To great danger to himself ofc.

Repeat characters (like in Firefly they have Badger and Saffron who rock up as major non crew characters) are Chapel and Rand. I think Chapel is still on a core planet as a nurse. I would have her join the crew in season two, to look for her missing husband. But in season one she can be an insider informant for the hospital heist episode, which they do mainly for the medical equipment cos Bones has like nothing to treat people with. And maybe Spock has some additional medical needs that Bones needs to learn (Spock hates this)

Rand is like a bit of Saffron energy but less totally untrustworthy. I think she works them for her benefit but in a way where when they meet again they're like hey Janice you're not allowed on the ship but it's great to see you! Like, maybe she hijacks them to get her somewhere or stows away super inconveniently. Or maybe she just steals from them old school style and has a very all's fair in love and war vibe about it. She just doesn't hold any resentment, so it's hard to resent her

If I were to cast this show I'd cast Bones and Jim and women because I think it needs more women, might as well put them in positions of power, and honestly I think Spock's character with the emotional repression and all would change being cast as a woman whereas the others wouldn't. Spock's character in this is gonna be playing into stereotypes and expectation to stay in hiding, and those change as a woman

I've definitely got less tension on board than Firefly. There's no Jayne equivalent making life hard for everyone, but you could write an arc in for Chekhov like that if you wanted to. He could go from disliking the danger Spock and Uhura bring to absolutely admiring them over like two seasons. Could be interesting, but it's not got much to do with trek really

There's no shipboard romance here either. There could be something cool in the Scotty/Uhura that happened later in trek canon. Maybe they've got romantic history, so when she joins the ship there's tension and they just fall into bed together pretty quickly. But I'd only put that in if it added something else to the story, which it might! I'm not actually writing, I'm brainstorming

And similar to what the did in Firefly I think Spock/Bones makes the most sense. Cos we don't need proof that Spock and Jim understand each other, they're captain and first officer. They have each other's back absolutely. And similarly with Jim and Bones, they'd have old loyalty and friendship to draw on. And I think they also just obviously get along. But Spock and Bones could do with some plot prodding along, so I'd do something like the Simon/Kaylee romance where there's tension and clear desire but they're bad at making it happen. There's too much in the way. But it adds reason for Bones to have Spock's back (cos we're coming at at the start of their friendship, not years into their five years mission) and you can occasionally see Spock relaxing the emotional wall with someone other than Jim as he develops more serious a crush

I want to see! The Niska episode where Jim and Spock get nicked and tortured, and Bones goes in to trade for them back. He can only afford one but true to the Empath ep he just trades himself and volunteers for the torture.

I also want to see a Jaynestown style ep where Scotty or Sulu are the hero. I think probably Scotty. He'd be easy to write as selfish in a he only cares about tech kinda way and then to find that he accidentally did this would be funny. He also likes to keep a low profile generally so it's extra hilarious

Hospital heist ep, with Chapel cameo. I don't think anyone's handing Spock over to the feds, but maybe they get caught and Chekhov tries to trade Spock for their freedom? Not in a pre planned malicious, but more that he just doesn't prioritise Spock's safety over everyone else's. He sees it as a last ditch leverage effort, for the greater good. Could be good drama

Saffron style ep with Rand but she steals from them. I do think that's hilarious, showing them be the mark. And I'd let her win, leave them stranded without whatever thing it is she fleeced and having to find a new magical tech engine bit. But hey she left some booze as an apology and made out with Jim so it's not too bad

I really like Firefly

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 6 Tsumihoroboshi pt. 14

It’s gratifying to see that even the VN itself is starting to see my side of things and imply that maybe Satoshi didn’t actually kill his aunt. Of course I’m also willing to buy completely that he totally did that, and I’m a silly man for thinking that, but you know… Nyeh. Suddenly I'm struck with a question/theory that makes no sense whatsoever, but it's an interesting thought for me to consider. Hell with it, I wonder if Hanyuu knows something about the disappearance of Satoshi? I have absolutely no basis for that idea, and honestly I think Ryukishi07 himself probably forgot about him at this point, but still.

Interesting choice of phrase there, “terminal.” Also it sure is a wild coincidence that Rena just so happened to pick that name seemingly out of thin air. Keiichi is such a dork it’s funny sometimes man, “Hey, that’s bioterrorism!” Just absolute gold star writing.

Keiichi recommends that Rena just bring this information to Ooishi, because all of this sounds a lot bigger than two teenagers. Rena has her doubts because despite everyone being fairly confident in the belief that Satoshi probably killed his aunt they instead just pinned it on a random drug addict. Also since the Sonozakis apparently have more power than god you can’t trust the police because they’re being controlled by them, and more than likely have some Oyashiro fanatics amongst their number. Keiichi asks how they can hope to win against such impossible odds.

I don’t know if I mentioned it earlier, but during the scene where Rena talks to Takano, the color on her dialogue changed from pink, to a more light red color. After the discussion with Takano it went from a light red to a darker, but still light red. It’s a very subtle change, kind of an on the nose one, but I like this little gimmick. I love it when media starts using the unique properties of their medium this way. It reminds me a lot of in chapter one: Onikakushi when it played the sound of something being hit it would have the options in the lower portion of the screen move around groggily like it got hit. I wish the modded version kept that, but it’s only in the unmodded version of the VN.

Rena tells Keiichi that because of this information that they have to keep this info from both Mion and Rika, since they’re the heads of two of the three families, they’re probably in on it. Rena then theorizes that if they really are religious fanatics, they’ll probably strike on an important holiday, something like Watanagashi maybe? She also thinks they for some reason have until Watanagashi 1984 to deal with this issue, Rena then has to wrap up the phone call, and the two part ways. Keiichi reflects on how diabolical this plan is, because if they just attacked Rena she could go to the police, but they haven’t so she’s forced to more or less sit on her hands and wait. I’ve mentioned it before, but I do like how this chapter is basically just a reverse Onikakushi, with Rena in the paranoia role.

And so good ol’ Looselips Keiichi decides to confront Mion directly and ask her if she’s involved in a deadly conspiracy.

I like how cocky and sure of himself Keiichi was at the start of the accusation, but as time went on he very quickly came to realize how little of what Rena told him actually makes sense. He really is just easily swayed by a pretty face, Rena did it, and now if you wanted to look at it in a very uncharitable light Mion’s doing it. Again I so very badly want to make fun of him for his buffoonery, but I also got horribly duped and misled so… glass houses I guess. Also I like how Mion just instantly knows that this is entirely something Takano caused.

Given what I know about Takano I wonder why she went to such lengths to do this sort of thing. Was it just for funsies? Love of a good goof? Some sort of built-in defense in case someone tried to place the blame onto her for trying to ascend to godhood using a somewhat known pre-existing curse? Just so she could be accused of that and have people go “oh that wacky Takano and her occultic shenanigans?”

Part of me wants to play it off and act like it was around this part I realized I had fallen for it. But it wasn’t, during most of the rest of the chapter in the back of my mind the explanation that it’s parasites just stuck around. You’d think that with a character like Mion just point blank explaining why the idea that the villagers were trying to be isolationist weirdos doesn’t work would beat itself into my skull, but you'd be wrong.

[sankatsuka]

Tenma Siblings Discussion - How Saki Feels About Tsukasa, A Seflessness that Makes You Feel Undeserving

"But I'm not getting better at all... I'm ALWAYS troubling them, big brother, mom and everyone else...!"

Warnings:

Discusses JP dialogue from Smile of Dreamer, Hinamatsuri, Dazzling Lights, NSNF

HC territory as usual

HFD Tsukasa delusioner

I'm sorry but I was personally uncomfortable with what happened in Hinamatsuri, so this discussion helps justify Saki's behaviour. You may not like it if you thought Saki was entirely justified, sorry again!

In NSNF JP, I found the choice of wording interesting: first thinking about Tsukasa, then their mother, then delegating their father within the "and others".

From how she mentions him first, she seems to instinctively recognize Tsukasa as being the one most affected that she has to miss out. Moreso than their parents who are the ones logistically impacted, which probably shows their parents did a good job of not making her feel like a burden. This small detail and mention of Tsukasa in NSNF, as well as using the same flashback period as Dazzling Lights, implies Saki has always known how much Tsukasa focuses on her and how her wellbeing strongly affects him.

In NSNF, she's shown to be able to generally recall events, but not the strong emotions she experienced in them. So of course she can easily say 'Tsukasa has always cared for her', but it doesn't mean it is properly nailed in. She seemed to show a lack of awareness of this in Hinamatsuri, with how she never thought her forced smile would affect him to such an extent and how she only mentions Tsukasa's loneliness in passing. She also acts rather strangely in Hinamatsuri - she quickly snaps at her brother despite being very well aware of how he will always act in favour of her happiness. We see in unit story that Saki would never get angry at a loved one even if they hurt her (Honami), yet she doesn't think twice before getting angry at Tsukasa.

This is what leads me to HC that perhaps, her feelings towards the part she plays in Tsukasa's happiness are suppressed too. Because she can't just be "okay" to be happy on her own, she also would never be "okay" enough to not make her brother sad. It makes her happy to feel so valued, but with how she is, there's nothing she can do for him in return, not even just be happy and fine. Perhaps this is why she feels urged to have to smile even when she feels like crying from happiness, so she can give something back to her brother. Or even, maybe she cries because she can't do anything for him in return, yet he gives her so much and makes her feel so loved when she feels worthless. There's inevitably that feeling she doesn't deserve him, that perhaps she may even feel like he's going to leave her someday because she can't give anything to him.

You'd think that after being cared for so much, Saki would want to repay it twice as much now that she's able to. But she doesn't, and instead has him doing favours for her (buying her things). It's just easier and feels better to go about your day as if everything's always been normal that way instead of face all the pain from the past and try to make up for it. Plus, feelings in the past don't change that easily - just like how her self-hatred still stays strong enough for her to compose the powerful song in NSNF, her helplessness towards her brother won't just disappear. It instead manifests in turning a blind eye to it and simply continuing the way her past self has: just being carefree and happy and keeping up with trends, just like how she deals with her own self-hatred.

If Saki stops playing the role of the smiling sister, and instead goes all-out to do more for her brother, to return all the love he's shown her - it means having to face that helplessness and how she feels undeserving of Tsukasa's presence in her life. Not only will it make Saki feel less of a sister, it will further ruin their siblinghood when it was built upon such a one-sided foundation. She knows a normal brother isn't supposed to be this way (Smile of Dreamer side story), that everything Tsukasa has done till today truly makes Tsukasa the 'best brother in the world'. But the 'best' is all it will amount to, because thinking anymore beyond that will destroy their bond.

Before it was with the tattered Hina dolls, and now we see Tsukasa going the extra mile again to buy Saki the new Hina dolls. I don't want to think she's naive: it's obvious from first glance Tsukasa spent money to buy all those dolls for her, and she knows from all these years of growing up with him that her brother is always well-intentioned: he will always act for her happiness, Saki knows. But now she has more she has to return for him.

So Saki could have uncharacteristically lost her temper because Tsukasa's actions had exacerbated her suppressed feelings of helplessness towards him. She doesn't want to lose him if he keeps doing more than she can possibly return to him. Saki isn't the type to lose control over her emotions to the point of saying such hurtful things to someone she cares and loves - NSNF demonstrates this that she will keep things inside if she thinks it will hurt other people, even if it's painful. Such a habit doesn't easily die off. That's why this HC suggests that Tsukasa's actions may have triggered her somehow. In the first place, Tsukasa was throwing away something that Saki cherished as a way of appreciating his strong love for her - Tsukasa was belittling her own efforts to return everything he's done for her. If she already doesn't feel anything is enough, it's bound to be triggering.

Her suppressed helplessness and self-hatred does seem to lead her to act irrationally against her own will. She wants her loved ones to be happy, but she also has her own needs of companionship that she can't meet because of the way she was born. There's that contradiction that forces her to keep smiling and make jokes but also want to control others. She rags on herself for being born different, begs people not to leave her no matter what and expresses a desire for everyone to just disappear so she can finally have everything she wants: a world where she isn't left alone (/because no one is there) and everyone (/no one) is happy.

It may have been a budget issue, but the writers also made the choice not to have Tsukasa appear in NSNF Episode 7, despite how he's the one who gave Saki the belief that 'tomorrow will be fun', which is exactly what served as Saki's light in NSNF. And it's strong enough of a feeling that in Hinamatsuri's side story, Saki feels comforted seeing the light from his door at night, which reminds her she won't be alone in the hospital at this time of the year again, and that she can sleep soundly and safely think tomorrow will indeed be fun and not another day of being isolated. Yet he doesn't appear in NSNF to serve as one of the lights in her darkness.

Personally, it seems right to me that he doesn't appear in NSNF. It just feels out of place and ingenuine. I guess it's because I don't feel like any of Tsukasa's bonds feel real because of how he's lacking his own self so much. Saki's own feelings towards him, as I describe here, explain why it doesn't feel real: being too selfless and self-sacrificial makes it difficult for someone to love you back: instead, you become someone they feel they don't deserve. I honestly find it... sad, when it was something he worked so hard for as a child. It makes sense why Tsukasa believes he always makes Saki sad, when it can be possibly true with how he cares far too much about her that it troubles her.

[minevn]

Who all are more then likely to accept a marriage proposal by a ring pop instead of an actual ring? ^^

I lowkey feel like all of them would

Minato: I feel like Minato is more traditional(excluding things like gender roles and all that shit) So he might prefer an actual ring, but also its you and if you really wanted a ring pop instead of an actual ring, then it still counts for him.

Haruto: Would chuckle at you silly antics. Would buy you guys actual rings for the ceremony, BUT instantly puts the actual ring in a box somewhere and wears the ring pop daily. The ring pop will always be your guys ring.

Jun: Laughs and accepts. He'll accept any kind of proposal from you honestly. She might suggest bedazzling your ring pops to give them more personality, maybe eventually making resin ring pops in case the candy goes bad or it ends up chipping or breaking.

Hoshi: Denies at first honestly, but the more he thinks about it, the more he likes the idea. Normal rings are so boring, I think he'd like an exciting ring for you two, even if it's candy. He'll approach you and ask for the ring pop before sliding it on your ring finger, allowing you to do the same.

Habiki: He doesn't care either way. He hasn't really thought about wedding or rings. Doesn't really process the fact that you proposed to him until later that night and he sits up and stares at his ring with shock. He'll smile gently and plop back down, unable to stop himself from smiling wider.

Kage: Probably passes out. Doesn't process the fact it's a ring pop, process the fact that YOU proposed to HIM???? He's so happy. Is confused when he wakes up and sees a ring pop on his finger instead of an actual ring, thinks the proposal was all just a dream and he'll ask you about it, just to pass out again when he realizes you DID propose to him.

Kei: Chuckles, kissing the ring pop and getting some flavor on his lips before kissing you. If the ring pop ring is what you want, then it is what you shall have. Though he'll recommend making fake ones so they don't break or go bad.

Yani: Is so SO happy, doesn't care that it's a ring pop, she's just overjoyed that you proposed to her! Thinks the ring pop is PERFECT. Her ring pop breaks easily though whether it be from her rolling around in her sleep a lot and beating someone up for breathing in your direction. She'll run to you while crying, explaining the broken ring pop and how she still loves you so the broken ring pop means nothing.

Aki: Laughs, this reminds her of something she did to you when you were younger and playing house. Happily accepts the ring and looks at it fondly before kissing it. If it ever breaks, she makes sure to buy ring pops in the exact same color.

[dragonlapis]

I've been thinking about this lately...About if Oriko had a more prominent role in arc 1 and then later onto arc 2...first we gotta focus on arc 1 to make things easier...then we can do arc 2

Instead of the usual Iroha's team ...It could be Kanagi who she meets first and through her she meets the apartment trio...So it would be a team of Iroha, Kanagi, Seika, Leila, and Mito. Shirgue and Hagumu could replace Momoko's gang or we could use the Azalea trio for that...But I would like for Shirgue and Hagumu to be more prominent in this even if they are not teammates...so I'm tied on that-

Shirgue and Hagumu and the Azalea trio both have a lot of potential in this...

As for Oriko...She could have seen the magius in a vision and sent Kirika to go investigate over there while gaining some insight from Kyubey ..Discovering that he doesn't know anything about Kamihama other it being unusual and he can't access for some reason...This would peek her interests some more and decided to go over there to investigate...Once she sets foot in there, she immediately recognized something is very off here and gets another vision...Of Eve ...Eve being somewhere in the city and tells Kirika about it...In return Kirika tells her the usual amount of witches which lines up to the lack of witches in her place. A part of me wants to say the two decided to stay there and ditch school since Oriko decided this is much more important than that and Kirika just does whatever she wants really-

So they'll probably live in an abandoned building or find some place to live...Another part of me wants it where she lives in the same apartment complex where the apartment trio and Iroha is gonna live. Just to have the funny realization they all live in the same area without realizing it.

There's honestly two ways I can see how Oriko playing a role in this ...She and Kirika joins Iroha's team or at very least helps them since she recognizes the danger what the magius could do. Or joins them once she comes up with a plan on how working together with them will benefit them or buys into the idea of magius...I mean looking into the future would be very useful for either party really...or secret third option...She does things on her own as a neutral party.

If you want to have Yuma have a role in this...she could realized something off about Oriko and follows her into Kamihama City...I can see her joining Iroha's team tbh...Another thing could happen is her following Kyoko too...many possibilities...many thoughts

Also if you want it to be completely different...you can switch Iroha with Kuroe...also the promise blood and the rest will still be the same member wise

[bonesandthebees]

Anyway, I’ve talked a lot about Tommy without talking about Him, so let’s do that.

I was expecting Tubbo to be part of his group, but having him be there as just Tomys friend is so funny. It’s also adorable. (And it probably says a thing or two about how stubborn Tomys is, since he probably refused to go without him). Their dynamic very much gives “Your majesty, this is my emotional support best friend”.

Having Jack as a guard is giving me Stars flashbacks. Probably as intended. It’s funny that he is now Tomys guard instead of Wilbur’s. I was not expecting Puffy, but I probably should have. She’s there to make sure Tomys behaves, but she still has a lot of work to do about the etiquette. She also gives me the vibes of someone who deserves a raise.

Side note: did Niki or Quackity come with extra entourage? Like Niki was a baby, but Quackity was similar in age. Or is this unusual? (Also, I love the throne and crown, I’m sure that doesn’t have any ominous relation to certain tags on this fic)

Anyway, Tomys first impression reflects very badly on Sam. As we learn in chapter 3, everyone figures out why Tomys is there. And he’s clearly a bad first choice as a heir. (As in, if Sam were to die right now, Tomys would do terribly compared to Niki or Quackity).

He comes off as just a kid, which he is, but that’s not something you can be in this situation. None of the other kids got to have a normal childhood. On top of that Tomys is kinda a little brat, for a noble child at least, and not in the way those kids are normally brats.

But Sam seems rather fond of him. He’s very patient with him and all his blunders. I think he’s a kind king, but *looks at chapter 3* he’s not the brightest. It becomes very clear, very quickly that Sam did not think this true at all.

Like part of his decision process is wanting to decide something for himself because he’s self aware enough to know Phil is pulling the strings, but not smart enough to actually do it himself. So he brings Tomys and is all secretive, but then he didn’t talk it through with anyone and missed so many implications because he’s just living in his own world. But then he doubles down which is incredibly childish, but he wanted to make a desicion for himself and refuses to acknowledge that it’s backfireing (which is a very worrisome quality to have in a King).

Though I think some of it might just also be actually indecisiveness and wanting to buy himself more time to chose because he clearly doesn’t know who to pick based on how he asked Schlatt. He’s just digging himself a bigger hole and I’m scared he’ll double down further and will pick Tomys in the future just because Phil doesn’t want him to (can you tell I do not like Sam? Very good writing job on that, btw).

(2/?)

-🎄

no literally I was trying to figure out a position for tubbo that wasn't 'personal servant' just bc I didn't feel like doing that for this fic, and when I couldn't come up with anything I was like "...it's clingyduo tubbo would come just as his emotional support bestie" and then I thought back to how in historical movies you always hear about nobles having their ladies in waiting/companions/friends showing up with them everywhere like an entourage and I was like huh that would work

lol yeah after stars I'm a bit of a sucker for writing jack manifold as a guard again. he's just so good in that type of role, although I'd say he's going to have a smaller role here than he had in stars (though who knows I also didn't think stars!jack would play a very big role and look how that turned out). and of course tommy needed an adult chaperone so I thought of puffy. she's so tired of this shit.

yes, niki and quackity both came with entourages of their own although I'm not going to mention them bc I can't think of characters they'd be and I don't like throwing ocs into my fics for more than just a few lines here and there. except since niki was brought to the palace so young she essentially came just with her nanny and some guards, and when she was eventually given ladies in waiting they were provided by the palace not by summerdam. quackity was a little older so he showed up with a tutor, guards, and probably a private servant. still working out details on backstory stuff you know how it goes

yeahhh the thing is tommy's immaturity is pretty prevalent right off the bat, and while he's not overly bratty by noble kid standards, by potential future heir to the kingdom standards he's terrible. and it says something about sam's ideas towards leadership that he only just met the kid and has a bit of a soft spot towards him, because he doesn't know tommy. not at all. but he thinks he does.

i'm glad you don't like sam. he's meant to be a very messy character in rose. someone who so clearly wants to be good at this game he's playing but is just so blatantly not which causes problems for everyone else around him

[ficretus]

Knightfall and Pyrrha paradox

Funny thing to me is that Cinder killing Pyrrha makes Knightfall both possible and almost completely impossible. Now I am not saying this from the perspective of "damn, Pyrrha is competition, gonna have to kill her" or "only way to fall in love with someone is to murder someone close to them", more from a perspective of it being the only reason said characters are interacting and will interact.

Jaune would have no reason to interact with Cinder if it didn't happen, or at least, have an interaction that feels personal. Look at Volume 8 and Jaune coming face to face with Salem. Even though she is technically also responsible for everything he went through he gets no interaction beyond helping to fight her.

From Cinder's perspective, Jaune is completely irrelevant. He is neither Ruby nor does he hold Maiden powers. However, due to him getting in her way she is forced to interact with him. Most notably, it might get more personal from her side because Jaune prevented her from getting Winter Maiden power.

Is it possible to get to the similar scenarios without killing Pyrrha? It might be possible, but it's also heavily contrived. Let me run through two scenarios, one in which Pyrrha lives (Ruby intervenes before Cinder can kill Pyrrha) and one in which someone else kills Pyrrha.

PYRRHA LIVES:

For the sake of the argument, Arkos doesn't happen and Jaune only sees Pyrrha as a friend. Now, following the Fall of Beacon, team JNPR and Ruby go to Haven to foil Cinder's next plan. Instead of Jaune being one of the driving forces behind it, he plays more of a passive role. He is worried about Pyrrha because last time she went without him she ended up almost dying. So his primary goal is no longer getting to Cinder, it's being there for Pyrrha and making sure she doesn't do something reckless. Jaune also isn't as hard on himself as he is in canon timeline due to Pyrrha still being alive. Thing that pushed him to his feeling of perceived lack of worth is his survival complex about him living (but seemingly not contributing to anything) while Pyrrha ended up dying. Pyrrha on the other hand is probably against Jaune being there, wanting him to be someplace safe.

They go through various trial and tribulations and eventually get to the Haven (probably easier trip considering they had Pyrrha). They probably still get ambushed by Salem's faction, but matchups would play differently. There is no conceivable reason for Jaune to challenge Cinder on his own. Only reason he did so in canon timeline is the fact she was the one that killed Pyrrha and he considered himself to be worthless, so might as well die trying to buy some time against her. This doesn't happen in this theoretical timeline since Pyrrha would likely be matched against Cinder as her rival. At most I can see Jaune insisting on helping Pyrrha since he is worried she might lose to Cinder again. Even if this does happen, it's completely impersonal rivalry. Jaune dislikes Cinder but he fights her because he is primarily worried about Pyrrha. It never gets to the point he is openly challenging her and her beliefs.

Ironic thing is, if Cinder ever pulls out a spear and tries to kill someone, it's not gonna be Weiss, it's gonna be Jaune. While in canon timeline, for whatever reason, Cinder never attempts to seriously injure or kill Jaune, in this timeline she'd go after him since he is Pyrrha's kryptonite. Assuming Jaune survives this due to Semblance awakening, nothing really changes. Pyrrha remains Cinder's primary rival while Jaune takes more of a Weiss role of being person Cinder hurts to hurt the others. This might lead to some interaction between them down the line, but it lacks the edge their canon timeline counterparts have.

SOMEONE ELSE KILLS PYRRHA:

*spins Salem's factions wheel* and.... it's Emerald. Let's say Emerald at some point hides herself with her Semblance and assassinates Pyrrha. Timeline mostly remains the same as in canon timeline. RNJR embark to stop Cinder's plan at Haven, however, Cinder is no longer Jaune's primary goal, he wants to fight Emerald. So when they meet at Haven, he doesn't challenge Cinder, he goes after Emerald while Ruby has to fight Cinder.

This is probably the worst case scenario. This changes Cinder/Jaune rivalry to something completely impersonal and more akin to rivalry between Jaune and Salem in canon timeline. Yeah, he has to stop her from destroying the world, but that's about it. She is a boss to the person he personally wants to fight.

This not only cuts their rivalry to something completely impersonal, it also removes most of potential interactions between them. Assuming their characterization remains the same, they would still remain literary foils, but that alone is not enough. Take Neo and Jaune for example, they are also foils but the fact is they never interact. Even when lot of Silent Knight shippers speculated they'll have lot of interactions in Ever After it never happened. Because at the end of the day, Neo is character that was introduced as Yang's rival and at that point of the story played a role of avenger coming to kill Ruby. Her interactions in Ever After were always gonna be primarily with Ruby. Knightfall prospects in that theoretical timeline would probably be similar. Yeah, they could interact, but why would they.

____________________________________________________________

What are your thoughts? Is Cinder killing Pyrrha all part of Knightfall Golden Path or is it always gonna remain just another crack ship? Feel free to comment.

[queermania]

Hi I have read Play Crack The Sky and yes I am buying what you're selling here. How would you cast it? Obviously Cas as Derek and Dean as Stiles but does that make Sam Lydia? And who is Allison?

heck yes someone who knows what i'm talking about lol

okay yeah cas would be derek (closeted/even a little unaware, from a big family, feeling suffocated by how he thinks he should honor his family and his father's memory, etc).

dean would be stiles (dead mom. openly bisexual slut. cool persona but actually just so painfully nerdy underneath the bravado and charm).

sorry but sam doesn't get to be in the band. he can be jackson (getting back to his tech crew roots ayyy lol) (him and dean are still obviously gonna be brothers though).

charlie would be scott, probably (dean's best friend. mostly easy-going but willing to call him on his shit).

i am torn on who would be lydia. i want to say it's rowena but i just cannot picture her out of the gowns and in a rock band lmao. maybe it's jo. she can twirl drumsticks instead of knives.

eileen is allison. i don't know how that would work with the whole family business thing though. maybe this is how i finally work mildred into some spn fic. but eileen does fill the role of allison—someone who isn't there from the start but slots right in like she's always been part of their little found family.

victor can be danny. honestly a lot of people could be danny but i like victor so that's who i'm choosing.

hannah or even kelly would be paige. i'm leaning toward kelly for personality reasons.

donna would be erica. jody would be boyd. annddddd i don't know who would be isaac. meg, maybe? i have to think about it.

and then other crew members could include: garth, aaron, ash, pamela, gordon, etc.

unfortunately i have come to the conclusion that crowley and rowena don't really fit in this au which is devastating because i love them.

[sukirichi]

— out of reach | gojo x reader

request: Girllllll I just read your jealous gojo fic and my heart went 📈📈📈📈💥💥💥 youre now one of my fav writers 🙏🧎‍♀️And the spicy parts 😫😫😫 💖 If your asks are still open, could I please request a fic where GOJO has a size kink 🥺🥺🥺 my 5’1 ass is obsessed with that shizzzz 

pov: you’re gojo’s childhood friend and roommate – which leads to utter chaos – or perhaps utter bliss?

warnings: size kink, lots of teasing, lots of cursing, dirty talk, choking (probably not in the way you think), body worship, lots of size difference scenes, slight manhandling, overstimulation, thigh fucking, vaginal sex, unprotected sex (don’t do this irl guys) + unedited fic :D

notes: idk what happened here LMAOOO but i loved writing this one because i’m short as hell too lol. thanks for this request anon, i hope you like it! <3

word count: 10.5k

masterlist ! 

If you’re going to be honest, having Gojo as a roommate is something completely unexpected.

Not only are you two from entirely different worlds – him as a jujutsu sorcerer and you as an average human who can’t see curses – but he’s also just someone who is entirely out of your league. He’s respected and looked up to in his field of work, while half of your co-workers don’t even know your name, much less notice you in function parties where you mostly just nibble on sushi before calling it a day and turning back home.

You and Gojo met in elementary school. You could tell from the way he’s surrounded by servants and stern looking adults, firm hands on his small shoulders, that he was different from everyone else.

Apparently, he comes from one of the three big clans in the jujutsu world or whatever. You honestly don’t care about any of that, because Gojo refuses to act maturely about his role in the clan. You still remember how quiet he was on the first day of school, never smiling and keeping to himself despite your persuasion to eat lunch with him or play with him after school in the courtyard.

You miss that Gojo Satoru – the quiet, serious kid who was far too gentle in his actions yet firm in his words and beliefs. When you were still a little girl, you admired how he seemed older than his age, a wistful look in those azure blue eyes of his that you’ve always loved.

To you, Gojo Satoru was your hero. You’ve always been one of the shortest kids in class, and it didn’t help that you really loved pigtails all the way until middle school that made you an easy target from immature people who’s being hit way too fast by puberty and growing each passing day. You never minded your short stature because really, it’s just height, but you couldn’t ignore how your confidence dwindled each day when they called you several array of nicknames.

Too shy to fight back, you’d laugh it off or force a smile.

Gojo wasn’t having any of it. He’d break his silence and immediately pull you to his side (which only made things worse because Gojo was one of the tallest kids in class, further emphasizing how small you are right next to him) before threatening to smack the kids right in the face.

The threat should be enough to land him detention, but because he’s Gojo Satoru, the golden kid everyone loved, they took his word seriously.

At the age of eleven, you started seeing your best friend as your knight in shining armour. Gojo basked in this, growing protective and always glaring at whoever snickered when you walked past them. Sometimes he even bared his teeth to hiss at them, which was honestly so ridiculous now that you think about, though the message – the threat – always came across loud and clear.

So yeah, you love Gojo, you still do.

Years flew by and the two of you grew apart due to work and also as a part of growing up. You still kept in contact, messaging each other once a month to ask the other how they’re doing. His work kept him extremely busy though, and Gojo didn’t want you involved in the dangers of what he’s doing, so he makes sure to keep a safe distance.

Until six months ago, you hear a banging on your door. You’re just about ready to throw hands because your former roommate moved out to live with her stoner boyfriend, leaving you to shoulder all the bills and responsibilities of maintaining a two man apartment.

A sneer forms on your lips as you swing the door open, a scowl already on your face. You assumed it was your roommate who returned to get the pair of lace panties they left in their room, but instead, your childhood friend stands before you, taller (seriously, how has he not stopped growing?) and definitely a lot hotter than the last time you saw him.

One thing leads to another, and now it feels like there was never such distance between the two of you with how easily you both fell back into a comfortable – yet chaotic – rhythm and routine of being each other’s roommate.

Not that you mind, of course. Gojo’s definitely changed a lot from when you were kids. He’s no longer that stiff or sensitive when it comes to others. In fact, it seems like he loosens up a lot more with age, because you can barely recognize the man living under the same roof with you now.

For one thing, Gojo is loud. Like really talkative, won’t shut the fuck up and speaks like he’s in a screaming contest with someone. It doesn’t matter if you’re taking an important phone call or sleepwalking at three in the morning to pee, Gojo is always creating some sort of ruckus.

You’d never admit it out loud, but you loved it. You love him.

He’s definitely a lot more enthusiastic and fun to be with now that both of you have grown up, or in Gojo’s case, simply aged. His maturity reversed backwards because it feels like you’re taking care of a little kid.

Not only does his body clock is practically non-existent, he’s also horrible when it comes to taking care of himself and being punctual with work.

Fortunately for him, you love him, and you both leave for work at the same time. You always wake up earlier to prepare breakfast so you’d both have energy to start the day – although you highly doubt there’s really anything that depletes his endless source of one.

Sleepily walking through the kitchen with your fist rubbing at your eyes, you rummage through the refrigerator for some eggs when you realize there’s none.

Huh, you think to yourself, scratching your scalp. You’re sure that Gojo went grocery shopping last week since it’s his chore to do the outside stuff like buying groceries and throwing thrash, so where did it go?

You open shelf by shelf, checking each corner and shoving cans aside to look for the tray. With a glare, you stand on your tiptoes to pull the pantry open, only to have your mouth fall aghast because it’s all there – right at the back where you can’t reach it!

Fucking Satoru, you grit your teeth while heaving your body up onto the counter. It’s a struggle because not only are your muscles still half asleep, but because the shelf is right in your face, and if you’re not careful enough, you could hit it right with your face and fall over. Of fucking course you know Satoru did this to make fun of you – and now you retract your statement over your best friend.

It’s all a lie.

He’s a pain in the ass. Why do you even bother cooking for him and letting him live literally just a room away when you know he won’t stop pulling shit like this?

Because, the nagging voice in your head tries to mock, he’s your best friend and you can’t really say no to him. This makes you huff as you carefully pull the tray towards you, hooking two fingers at the edge while your other palm grips at the end of the counter for support. No thanks to your short limbs, you’re practically hogging the shelf by now in an attempt to reach it. You look ridiculous, that’s for sure, and you make a mental note to keep Satoru’s windows open tonight so he freezes to death –

“Aw, cupcake,” a sing-song voice emerges from the other side of the room. “You look so adorable. You should’ve woke me up if you need my help.”

“Fuck off, Satoru,” you flip him off. The man only laughs, the rambunctious sound echoing off the walls. It’s way too early in the morning and he’s already so damn loud; something builds up at the back of your head out of frustration already. His grin only gets wider when you finally got the eggs and clutch it your chest, setting it down on the counter while wiping your sweat away from your face. “Freeloader,” you mutter under your breath, ignoring him when he happily skips over to you.

“Ouch,” he places a palm over his chest, although you both know he’s never really affected by anything. “So what’s for breakfast today? You?”

“You know, I can kick you out anytime I want. I’m being extremely nice even going as far to cook you breakfast before you leave for work, so don’t test my patience.”

“Exactly, my best friend is so kind,” Satoru grows the audacity to rest his arm on your head. This triggers a reflexive response from you; shoulders tensing up and hands curling into fists beside you. “I would totally date her if she wasn’t such a temperamental little devil,” you nearly stab him with a fork with his statement, which he thinks he’s being so sly for but you heard it, and you’re most definitely not pleased with it. “Okay, I’m kidding! I’m going to go shower now!”

You roll your eyes at him and heat the pan over with some oil, muttering under your breath that you’re really going to kick him out soon. As if things couldn’t get worse – as if Satoru couldn’t get any worse – he smacks your backside in the process before darting to the showers.

“Gojo Satoru!”

“Morning, best friend, love ya!”

You were right. He is a pain in the ass.

“You don’t always have to walk me to work.”

“I know.”

“So why’re you still here? I’m not a little kid anymore,” Contrary to your words, you stick closer to Satoru when the morning rush of workers and students begin to crowd the streets. Your best friend notices this with a small smile, his hand resting on the small of your back. “Don’t even try, Satoru.”

“I wasn’t saying anything.”

“I know that look on your face,” you fiddle with the buttons of your uniform, sighing when Satoru follows you inside the bus after tapping your phone for two seats. It’s not a surprise to you anymore that most of your expenses are spent by him, for him, and he lazily sprawls his long limbs across the seat before you pulling you down right next to him.

As much as you hate this man, especially because he smirks at the attention he’s receiving from women – even men – in the bus, you have to admit he’s warm and smells damn good. You bite the inside of your cheeks, looking around in slight self-consciousness before inching a little closer, just to feel his warmth. He’s comforting – irrationally so – so you set your bag between the both of you to keep your sanity. “If you keep doing this, Principal Yaga might fire your ass because you’re never on time.”

“Trust me, cupcake, he won’t. I’m too valuable for that.”

How you saw that coming – you can’t tell anymore. The bus ride is relatively quiet and eventless, with you dozing off every now and then because you’re never a morning person. Thankfully, Satoru is more respectful this time around, lolling your head until it drops to his shoulder. After that, he snakes his arm around your waist before resting it on your thigh as a way to say you don’t have to head bang every damn second and just sleep.

On any other occasion, you would’ve hated it. You always look so small whenever you’re in Satoru’s presence. It doesn’t help that he’s long and lanky, either, his slender fingers effortlessly caressing your thigh while almost your entire body is flushed next to him. But right now, he’s too warm, too soft, and you’re too tired that for just a little bit, you allow yourself to relax.

A beeping wakes you up a moment later. Opening your eyes, you push yourself off Satoru when you see an old lady reaching for the handles. No one gave up their seats for her even as the bus driver asked her to find a seat lest she’d fall.

“Grandma, here, take my seat—” You’re about to stand up and offer it to her when Satoru tugs you by the wrist. Because of your small, wobbly composure, pulling you to him takes little to no effort. You end up on his lap, sitting on him as if you’re nothing but a small, dainty schoolbag. Satoru is clearly enjoying this because you feel him breathily laugh on the back of your neck, charming – annoyingly so – as he gestures to the now empty spot beside him.

“It’s no worries, Grandma. She’ll be fine,” he gestures to you, patting your head like you’re some puppy. “Please, take a seat. The bus is already moving.”

“Satoru, get off me,” You wriggle yourself from his hold, which only ends up in wasted effort because this big oaf doesn’t even budge. He even bounces you on one of his thighs, and you dig your nails into his arms as a silent plead for him to stop. He ignores this, ignores your small whines and the apparent embarrassment that has you debating whether to punch him or hide yourself in the safety of his uniform.

“She’s a feisty little one, isn’t she?”

The old lady watches the two of you banter, giggling behind her wrinkled hands. “You’re an adorable couple.”

“I think so too!”

“You’re so going to pay for this, Satoru,” you grumble, face planted onto your palms. This is it – the worst day of your life. It’s even worse because despite your protests, you have to admit his lap is actually comfortable. You’ve already known this before after countless times of cuddling with Satoru during movie nights, but its different when you’re both out in public. It feels...oddly intimate and maybe even romantic when he rubs soothing circles at your back, almost as if apologizing for this event. Most of all, you just hate the way something pools beneath your stomach at having him so close to you like this. “This is so embarrassing. I’m practically crushing you with my weight.”

“Please, cupcake, you barely weigh anything. I could easily lift you off with just my finger,” when you elbow him in the chest, Satoru only laughs, raising both hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I’ll stop teasing.”

You give up. No one seems to be paying much attention to any of you anyway, so you sigh, letting yourself hide in the crook of his neck as you watch the city pass through the windows. Your body moves as his chest rises and falls from his breathing, the movement oddly comforting. It’s embarrassing – it really is – but at least the grandma was comfortable until Satoru drops you off near your building.

“You don’t have to walk me all the way there.”

“Why not? You don’t want people to see us together or something?”

“No,” you stare at him from the corner of your eye. It’s no secret Satoru is attractive. This bastard knows it too, judging from the way he confidently and arrogantly swaggers next to you, hands shoved deep in his pockets as he walked with no care in the world. “My co-workers keep asking me for your number every time I tell them we’re not dating. It’s getting annoying at this point how they go Satoru this and Satoru that.”

“Am I hearing it right? Is cupcake jealous?”

“I’m not jealous, I’m disgusted,” you correct, “They don’t know how much of a pain you are to have around. They’re so focused with your looks that they completely overlook the fact you can’t even wash your dirty underwear!”

Satoru frowns at this, pointing his finger to you as if you’ve accused him of a huge crime. “Hey, I wash my underwear.”

“Yeah and last time you did, you mixed it with whites! My work uniform turned a stupid shade of blue! Now I can’t picture the colour of your boxers out of my head and it’s giving me a headache!”

“Wow, Y/N,” the smirk on his face and the sudden drop of nicknames lets you know you’ve said something wrong. Even behind his blindfold, you could tell his eyes are just sparkling with amusement. He’s enjoying this way too much. “I never thought you’d ever picture my boxers. I mean, I don’t mind showing it to you if you ask nicely—”

“Ugh, you’re so hopeless. I’m going to work.”

Gojo laughs when you jog away from him. He catches up with you in a matter of seconds, only having to take a few steps forward before he’s right beside you again. You’re unsure if you should be annoyed it’s so easy for him to always be right next to you, and how he almost always is right next to you while you prefer running away. It muddles with your heart and mind so much you pinch the bridge of your nose, trying not to be swayed by the sickeningly sweet sound of his laughter. “I can’t pick you up later, okay? I might work overtime!” (that’s a lie since Gojo prefers shopping and sightseeing)

Both of you know that’s a lie. Gojo never works overtime. He’s going to work for a few hours and so and call playing around with his students as “on-hand learning” before he goes shopping for stupid souvenirs and wild-flavoured mochis, then end his day by sightseeing and coming back home.

“Wasn’t expecting you to,” you mumble, waving goodbye to him as the office doors close. Slowly, Satoru’s grin and enthusiastic farewell fades into view until nothing but the pale, silver walls of your office greets you.

Funny how you claim to hate this man so much, yet the moment he’s out of sight, everything becomes dull and pointless.

It’s an absolutely shitty day. Your equally shitty boss blames you for something you didn’t even do, all because his incompetent secretary – who you’re sure he’s sleeping with – lost this month’s report and claimed she handed it to you last week when you’re not involved in that kind of work. Logic doesn’t come by them because your boss publicly humiliates and scolds you, calling you all kinds of names until tears are streaming down your face.

You slam the door shut the moment you get home, kicking your shoes off as you head straight to your room. You don’t bother taking your makeup off anymore as you change into a loose shirt and floral cotton shirts, padding to the kitchen after seeing Satoru is well nestled into the couch.

At least someone’s had a good day.

Seeing as the sink is empty, he probably hasn’t eaten dinner. This makes you sigh, because when will he ever learn to look after himself? He’s literally like a child.

Satoru pauses whatever he’s watching before he hovers over you, head tilted to the side as he gazes at you with curiosity. You ignore him and begin to set down some bowls and chopsticks for dinner, all the while Satoru is studying every inch of your tightly pulled face. “Bad day?” he concludes.

“Hmm.”

“Bad day it is then,” he nods to himself. “I can cook dinner, if you want.”

“And have you burn my apartment? No thanks,” you scoff, pushing him aside to retrieve the pans when you see that he’s placed them above again, even after you’ve reminded countless times to just leave it near the holders in the sink. “Ugh, why do you keep putting the pans in this shelf? You know I can’t reach this. I’ve had enough with you pulling pranks on me, and don’t think I’ve forgotten you placed my shampoo above the shower head today, you idiot,” you snarl and hop over the counter again to get the pans, trying your best to fight back the tears that are threatening to fall. “You’re really bothersome, you know that?”

“Then why don’t you kick me out?” he challenges, completely oblivious to how you’re struggling – both physically and emotionally. “You always complain about me being a nuisance here, but you’re not really doing anything to keep me out.”

“Because where else would you go?”

“Technically, I have a room back at the Institute.”

“Yeah, but because you’re so stupid and reckless that you got kicked out of your own home,” you spat out, and you watch as Satoru raises a brow at your statement. Banter is common between the both of you, but something about the intensity of your gaze lets him know you’re serious this time around. “I don’t even know how Yuuji puts up with you. That poor Megumi is right when he says you’re insufferable. You’re good for nothing!”

Satoru scoffs, “Fine, if you hate me that much, why didn’t you just say so earlier? I could easily pack my bags and go since I’m just making everything harder—” Satoru doesn’t get to finish what he’s saying when your hand over the counter that acts as support slips under you, and you fall, legs bent awkwardly while you scream, preparing yourself for the impact. The pan is long forgotten, your only thought was oh my god, so this is how I die.

But it never came, and you keep your eyes shut tight even as warm hands cup your ass. Satoru is breathing hard under you. Finally gaining the courage to crack an eye open, your breath halts when you see that he’s sitting on the floor, with you safely nestled between him.

Satoru has always had pretty eyes, but it’s rare he takes off his blindfold off even when he’s home. This is one of those rare occurrences that he seems like a normal human, dressed in a gray sweatshirt that hands low from his collarbones and magnetic blue eyes staring right back at you. His touch is gentle, almost as if he’s afraid to hurt you, and his voice that is usually loud and teasing comes out breathy and hesitant.

“Are you okay?”

Your gaze drops down to his lips. He’s close, so close, that if you just lean a little closer you could – you snap out of your daze. “Get off me.”

“Cupcake, you’re the one who’s on top of me,” his voice falls an octave lower, eyes flitting down to your clothing – or rather the lack of it – before Satoru takes a deep breath. “Did you really have to wear that?”

“I have the right to wear whatever I want in the comfort of my own home.”

“I wasn’t complaining,” he raised a brow, this time completely in control of himself as he gazes back up at you with a burning gaze. You see nothing but the way one corner of his lips tilt up, almost teasing, and he looks so much like a shit-eater that you feel heat crawl down your spine.

You push yourself off him but your bent foot behind you slips, and you fall forward with your hands clutching his strong shoulders. Satoru catches your leg behind you, drags it forward until your knee is pressed in between one of your warmth, very much still enjoying the way you wriggle away from his hold. He knows his effect on you – but you deny this wholeheartedly.

“Careful, cupcake. This isn’t a slip and slide.”

“I hate you so much,” you bare your teeth at him, slapping his chest until he finally lets go of you. Turning your back to him, you pick up the pan and begin preparing your dinner, muttering curses under your breath as you heat up the stove. “I’m kicking you out tomorrow.”

“Why not now?”

“Eat your damn dinner first.”

Dinner after that is awkward. Although Gojo is someone who can wolf down his meal in three seconds, he takes his time in eating to start conversation with you. Sometimes he asks decent questions like how your day was or he’d talk about something stupid, but he’s quiet the whole time. He even volunteers to do the dishes before retreating to his room, coating the house in silence.

It almost feels like you’re all alone over again.

You’ve gotten so used to him being an utter mess everywhere that when he’s not trying to piss you off and actually giving you the much needed peace, you begin to hate it. Memories of the rude things you’ve said to him a while ago play and in your head, and you bang your head against the wall repeatedly.

How are you supposed to apologize to Satoru now?

The answer doesn’t come until you stare at your walls, wide awake at midnight. The house is still eerily silent and you don’t stop shuffling around your bed in discomfort. Many times, you wished that Satoru would shut up and leave you alone, but now that he’s actually done that, it feels weird. Uncomfortable. It feels wrong.

With a grunt, you kick off the sheets and carefully tread to his room, knocking lightly in case he’s already sleeping. “Satoru?” you call out, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. “Are you awake?”

You’ve seen Satoru angry as kids before, but what would he be like now? Would he still want to be your friend? Would he still annoy you by hiding your things somewhere you can’t reach? Or would he be the who is now out of reach? If he leaves...who’s going to walk you to work? Who’s going to complain he doesn’t want to do groceries but buys you things you don’t ask for but want anyway? Who’s going to keep teasing the living daylights out of you if not him?

All these thoughts claw at the back of your mind until your bottom lip trembles. You hate how weak you feel; how you’re never careful with your words.

You never meant it when you said all that.

Your train of thought is cut off when the door swings open, revealing an equally tired-looking Satoru. At the sight of you peering up at him with glossy eyes, he pushes the door wider and steps closer to you, his large hands cupping your face as he leans down in worry. “Cupcake,” his brows pinch together, “Did something happen? Is something wrong?”

“I just wanted to apologize for everything I said,” you blurt out, “I was just tired from work and my boss was being shitty, so I wasn’t totally myself that time and I’m really sorry I took my anger out on you. I didn’t mean it when I said you’re insufferable and that I’m kicking you out so – yeah,” you breathe out, trailing your gaze downwards to stare at your feet instead. It’s difficult to look him in the eye right now. When you finally gain courage to speak again, it barely comes out as a whimper, your hands delicately tugging at his shirt. “Please stay. I like having my best friend around here.”

Satoru doesn’t answer.

You’re about to look up at him just in case you’ve said something wrong, or worse, he refuses to forgive you, but then – “Yeah, I know you wouldn’t kick me out. You’re too much of a darling to say no to me.”

Sigh. Satoru laughs when he sees your shoulders deflate, absolutely shattered in exhaustion. Hiding your smile to now show him you’re relieved, you punch his chest that really feels like a fly had accidentally flew into him. “Way to ruin the mood, Satoru. And here I thought I could have a serious conversation with you for once.”

“Apology accepted,” he beams, tilting your chin upwards so you could look at him. Even in the darkness of his room, his eyes glow, leaving you hypnotized in its beauty. “Plus, I think I’m the one who should apologize. You’re right; I haven’t been the best roommate and I am a freeloader,” he scratches the side of his head in thought. “But I do buy you food all the time though.”

“Yeah, with my money,” you counter, but you don’t really care anymore at this point. You’re beyond elated you’re both fine now, and you shyly gesture to his big, warm bed that suddenly looks so comfortable. “Can I stay here for tonight?”

“You want Satoru’s bear hug?”

“Yes, I do.” There’s no hesitation in your words and you don’t complain anymore when he easily picks you up like a ragdoll using only one arm. He’s surprisingly gentle when he places you both down on the bed, sheets warm and soft as it blankets over you.

It would be perfect – except it’s so damn awkward.

Gojo’s long limbs are everywhere. Your face is pressed into his chest, both your legs tangled together. His arm is sprawled over the curve of your hip, his hand nearly grazing your ass that’s barely covered by the thin material of your shorts, but if he shifts, he’ll end up cupping the back of your thighs which is equally uncomfortable.

He seems to be stuck in the same position because you’re so small, and your knees are grazing his groin. Had he known you’re going to sleep with him, he would’ve worn underwear or even boxers under his sweatpants.

He’s never told you before, but he prefers to sleep in the nude. Satoru only picked up the nearest pair of pants when he heard you knock, and even then, he didn’t have the time to wear a shirt.

Your breath is hot on his skin and he’s so sensitive and aware of all your movements. Satoru clears his throat awkwardly, shifting until his arm lightly holds your back instead, but then he pulls away as if he’s touched fire when he’d unknowingly fiddled with your bra clasp instead. It’s so painfully awkward that Satoru chuckles above you, while you scrunch your nose, silently praying to the heavens above that he won’t hear how loud your heart is beating right now.

“Why is it so hot in your own room?”

“Maybe it’s time you get me an AC.”

“You wish, Satoru,” you mumble beneath him, making yourself as comfortable as you can with your cheek resting on his bicep. It’s not the softest pillow considering he’s pretty muscular, but he’s warm and smells like mint spice nevertheless. “You’re really not going to put on a shirt?”

Satoru sighs, a long and loud one that is extended for dramatic purposes. Suddenly, he pushes your knee off of him, grimacing and thanking the darkness that you can’t see how much he’s struggling right now. “Cupcake, this is hard for me as much as it is for you. You’re barely wearing anything.”

“Since when have you cared about what I wear?”

“I’m a man, Y/N,” is what he reasons with, “You’re lucky it’s me. Had it been someone else and you crawled into their bed wearing these—” Satoru pinches the waistband of your shorts, and you squeal in protest, only making him laugh afterwards before he lets it go and the material snaps back at your skin, “—poor excuse of what you call shorts, I can’t guarantee they’ll give you a peaceful night.”

You know exactly what he’s trying to hint at. Still, it’s hard to believe that Satoru is capable of seeing you that way.

It’s not that you feel you’re unattractive. You know you’re pretty and have been out on many dates, but it’s easy to feel that you’re not sexy when you have the height of a thirteen year old and you’ve been constantly chastised about it.

Satoru’s not-compliment compliment has your heart skipping a beat, and you scoff in response. “Shut up,” you warn lamely, “I want to sleep.”

“Then let’s sleep, cupcake.” You don’t know if it’s because you’re utterly exhausted that you doze off seconds later or if Satoru’s words just held power in them, but soon all thoughts of anything unwanted drifts out the window, his arms keeping you close, completely safe and sound until the worst nightmares couldn’t even come close.

Hot. It’s extremely hot.

You crack an eye open to try and find the source of this uncomfortable heat, but you freeze when you realize you can’t feel your muscles from the chin down. Panic rises in your throat once you see the current predicament you’re in, and a scream rips through your throat so loud that the birds outside scurry away in a flurry.

You’re wrapped in Satoru’s blanket and comforter, rendering you unable to move because of how he’d treated you like a burrito wrap. Even your toes are captured inside this hell, and only your head is able to wriggle side to side.

“Satoru!”

The culprit comes out of the shower a split second later, his hair dripping wet and only a towel hanging low from his lips. If you weren’t so hell-bent on killing him, you would’ve been speechless at the way water drips from his hair down to the curves of his abs, going down down down into a place only your darkest imaginations could take you.

Satoru bends over in laughter as he whips out his phone, jumping from angle to angle and side to side to take photos of you. “Fuck,” he howls, slapping his thigh while you snarl in an attempt to break free. “You’re a lot cuter than I thought you’d be.”

“Satoru! Get me out of here!”

“No, this is way too gold. I’m sending these to my students.”

“Satoru, I’m serious!” The devil incarnate himself falls deaf to your please.

Maybe it’s because the violent intent has coursed through your veins so strongly that a surge of energy and strength overcomes you, and soon, you’ve rolled out of the blanket. The fresh air nipping at your heated skin is most welcomed, but right now, you had a mission to fulfil: obliterate Gojo Satoru.

The platinum haired man is still laughing to himself, too distracted in scrolling through the best photos to send to his students that he doesn’t notice you escaping and zooming straight right at him.

The momentum is enough to catch him off guard until you end up on top of him, short arms clawing your way through to snatch his phone. Satoru yelps when his phone lands out into the living room and your hands come down to choke him. You don’t have plans to kill him, but you want to hurt him enough to remind him you’re not someone he can fuck with.

You’ve just about had enough of this man and you’re so sick of him!

Satoru yells out a “Hey!” when you let out a battle cry, using your legs to kick him back when he tries to sit up. Your plan backfires when your hands slip down his wet skin and you fall face forwards, hands barely touching the ground for support when your lips come crashing down on his.

He stills underneath you. It takes a moment for you to realize that holy shit, you’re kissing him and his lips are so soft that has you scrambling back, but Satoru doesn’t let you.

His large hand comes up at the back of your neck to pull you forward. The sudden movement makes you gasp, and Satoru slips his tongue inside when you do so. You no longer remember how you got here or try to make sense of what’s going on, because he feels so good, tastes so good that you bury your nails in his hair while he ravishes your mouth.

You’re so tiny that his hand cups your entire buttcheek almost possessively, a low growl emanating deep in his throat when your tongue eagerly intertwines with his. Satoru tastes like heaven and everything about the kiss is sloppy – tongue clashing with one another and teeth nibbling at the other’s lips. It’s clear both of you can’t get enough of one another as you moan in his mouth, shamelessly grinding on his crotch, suddenly thankful that you’re always wearing thin clothes when you feel him harden underneath you.

“Fuck, baby,” he pulls away to breathe, a string of saliva connecting the both of you. “Yeah, just like that,” There’s something empowering about the way he pants at your ministrations, especially when you roll your hips faster across his erection. “Keep going, baby, you’re doing – fuck – so well.”

You smirk at his praises, latching your teeth on his neck to suck marks on them. Satoru groans at the same time you muffle your moans through his skin, his hands sliding under your shirt to tug the cups of your bra down. You nearly lose it when he pinches your nipple, bolts of electricity running down your spine at the contact. A moan breaks through your lips just as you come right there and then, the wetness of your sudden orgasm barely hidden in your flimsy underwear.

“Feel good?” he teases and drags your shirt down to the other side, but the post-nut clarity hits. And when it does, it hits hard.

Fuck. You just came from Satoru’s simple touches, and he’s so unsatisfied, still painfully hard underneath you but nothing but panic and regret washes over you like a strong tidal wave. Suddenly, you grow lightheaded as you push yourself off him, fixing your bra while ignoring the confused and hurt look on his face.

“I gotta go to work,” you run out the room, feeling your body tremble as Satoru runs after you. “Make yourself breakfast. I’ll eat on the way out.”

“Y/N, wait!”

You know you’ve just ruined everything – that nothing will ever be the same after that – but you’re scared, utterly and remorsefully so, that you slam the door right in his face as if you don’t have any idea how much you broke him.

You’ll never forget the way Satoru’s face fell when you left.

Just as you thought, nothing is the same after that. The tension is so thick around the apartment you make an effort and go out of your way just to avoid him and the apartment completely.

It’s cowardly – you know this much – but do you ever try to fix the friendship you cherish but shattered completely? You don’t. You don’t because it only crashes down onto you now that maybe your feelings for him aren’t just platonic, after all. It’s even worse because you touch yourself at the thought of him filling you up when he’s asleep, all because you want him so bad and the mere presence of him has your brain malfunctioning.

It isn’t entirely sexual either. Yes, you want to fuck him badly, but it scares you down to the core even more because you want so much more than that.

Now you understand why you always say he’s a bother but never asked him to leave. It’s because you like him, actually romantically interested in him. It makes sense now why you always felt so annoyed whenever your co-workers asked for his number, or how you’re immediately pissed off when Satoru talks about this hot woman he saw at work. You always chalk it up to an excuse you just hate how he can’t keep in his pants, but it isn’t true at all.

It’s because you actually like him – and you’re at a loss on what to do or how to deal with it.

The next few days feels like hell. Satoru isn’t stupid; he knows you’re avoiding him. He stops teasing you eventually and even buys takeout all the time when you lock yourself up in your room right after work, refusing to cook dinner or even eat all so you’d be spared the torture of looking at him.

He’d knock at your door and ask you to eat, but other than that, he’s respected your distance.

You feel like the most terrible person on earth. You don’t miss the way dark circles line under his eyes or how he’s lost his spark, barely even speaking to you when you’ve come or about to leave for work.

You’re alone the whole ride, as well, and it only dawns on you how lonely you are when Satoru isn’t always annoying you all the time.

But it doesn’t make sense. Why is he so bothered by it? Didn’t he regret it? It’s painfully clear you’re not Satoru’s type. You’ve seen the women he dated before, and you’re not close to them so why does he seem like he’s struggling with this as well? Or maybe...he’s just sad that his friend is avoiding him.

Yeah, that has to be it.

Satoru is a man. He was probably turned on at that time, but after giving some thought about it, he probably wants to keep his distance too. He’d be insane if he ever actually wants to date you – his best friend out of all people – because he’s Gojo Satoru and he could literally have everyone else.

You don’t care that you’re a coward.

You don’t care that Satoru is sad to see you this way.

You don’t care because you know he’ll reject you, you know he’ll be weirded if you admit your feelings for him. To him, you’re like his little sister. There’s just no way you two would work out. For now, you have to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. You just need some time to get over your feelings for him, and when you’re confident you won’t fall for him again, you’ll mend your friendship.

You just need time.

“So, Y/N, you still don’t want to give us your friend’s number?”

“Yeah, Y/N, you should share it,” your co-worker encourages by jabbing her shoulder to yours. It’s a lazy Friday night and the staff went out for dinner. You don’t usually come to these hangouts since dinner with Satoru is always much more fun, but he’s the last person you want to think about now, so you happily join them. Now, though, you’re starting to regret ever coming here. “If he’s really single like you said, then it shouldn’t be a big deal to ask for it.”

“Well, since you want it so badly, why don’t you ask him directly for it instead?” you snap, feeling anger begin to trickle. All you wanted was just one day where you don’t have to think of him, but of course they had to bring him up. It’s also annoying how they can never seem to get the message across that you don’t want them dating him. “Why do I have to be the messenger?”

“We haven’t seen him much. Doesn’t he always walk you to work?”

“He’s been busy with his job, that’s all.” And also because I’m avoiding him – so now he’s avoiding me too.

“He’s a teacher, right?”

“Oh, come on, guys, don’t be so dense,” your senpai chugged her drink rather loudly, catching the attention of your nosy co-workers who wouldn’t stop pestering you for his number. “Look at how uncomfortable she looks. It’s obvious she doesn’t want you guys to be involved with her friend for a reason. Think of how weird it is for her too if ever her co-worker and best friend dated. She’s going to feel like a third wheel.”

“I’m not—”

“That makes sense,” your co-worker nodded beside you, “Are you sure you just don’t like him though?”

“Ew, why would I?” the food began to taste bitter through your lies, “He may be tall and attractive, but as his roommate, I’ve seen his ugly side. Satoru is a complete slob and can’t even cook to save his life.”

“I don’t mind cooking for him all the time if I were to be his little housewife.”

“That’s never gonna happen,” your words came out harsher than it was, and you laugh it off with a wave of your hand when your co-workers’ eyes widened. “I’ve been living with him for six months and he’s never brought anyone home or told me he’s going on a date. I told you already, he’s a no strings attached kind of guy. He’s nothing but a one night stand.”

“You have to admit he’s still sexy though.”

Right. You hide your groan through another shot because there’s no way of convincing them otherwise. As much as you hate to admit, you’re actually jealous on how freely they could talk about him like that, but then again, it’s not like you and Satoru were dating – or would ever date, for that matter.

They start to leave one by one when it starts to get late, leaving only you who’s still desperate to avoid Satoru. Nothing prepares you for when the sky darkens and a storm comes pouring just as you’ve left the closing shop, the rain drenching and soaking your clothes through and through. Running under the nearest tree for shelter, you shiver. It’s cold – way too cold – and curse yourself for not bringing a darned umbrella.

The nearest bus stop is like what, fifteen to twenty minutes away? Your teeth are chattering and your legs are shaking, and you fumble through your phone as you dial a number you know by heart before you even realize what you’re doing. “S-Satoru?”

“Y/N,” the surprise is unmasked in his voice, something shuffling in the background before it falls silent. “Is everything okay?”

“Uhm, are you busy right now? It’s fine if you are, I’m just—”

“I’m training with Yuuji, but what is it?”

“Listen, I,” you inhale sharply when coldness bursts through your body, making you shiver and press yourself closer to tree to get away from the rain. Above you, thunder crackles before the rain grows heavier and angrier. “I forgot to bring an umbrella and I’m absolutely soaked right now. The nearest bus stop is fifteen minutes away and all the buildings here look so shady—”

“I’ll be on my way. Text me where you are,” You nod and thank him, too cold and numb to realize you’ve just broken days of silence. You lose track of time under there, hugging yourself until your lips turn blue. It doesn’t take long before Satoru shows up minutes later, his hair equally drenched and sticking flat to his eyes free from his blindfold while he pants, hand on his knees. “Thank goodness you’re safe. I rushed here so fast I forgot to bring an umbrella.”

After seeing Satoru drenched like that, something snaps within you. He doesn’t seem bothered by the fact the rain is unforgiving as it slaps the pavement, and your heart breaks when you see that he’s more concerned for you – even after you’ve given him the silent treatment. “You idiot! Now you’re soaking wet too, you’re going to get sick!”

“Highly unlikely,” he shrugs. “Come on, let’s get you home.”

“But what about—” Satoru suddenly carries you before draping his coat over your head, running until he found a cab to hail. He immediately asks the driver to turn up the heater while you tremble on top of him, not caring anymore that you’re sticking so close to him for heat.

Satoru doesn’t let you go all the way inside the apartment. He sets you down on the couch where you take off your wet clothes in haste, too cold with teeth chattering that you silently take the hoodie and boxers Satoru offers you, making sure to keep his gaze averted the whole time. Once fully dressed, you snuggle back into the sofa’s comfort, stiffening when the couch dips beside you.

Not a moment later, Satoru towel-dries your hair, leaving your mouth and throat dry with guilt. Even after you’ve unnecessarily been a bitch to him, he’s still so kind with you.

“Thank you for coming.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“Satoru...” you twiddle with your thumbs just as he starts to ruffle the towel in your hair, making sure to squeeze water out of the strands as he dries it. “About what happened the other day—”

“It didn’t happen if you don’t want it to,” his voice is cold’ monotonous and so emotionless you’re rendered speechless. “You can forget about it.”

“I...”

“You regret it, right?” he’s done with drying your hair, and he stands up to place the wet towels in the sink as you watch him stride all the way there. He’s changed his clothes too; looking comfortable in a plain white shirt and some grey sweatpants, looking every bit the domestic boyfriend you’ve always wanted but can never have. “It’s fine. We can forget about it and go back to normal,” to emphasize his point, Satoru winks at you, though it does nothing but make your heart sink.

“What if I don’t want to forget it?” your voice is small; hesitant and wavering with fear. “What if...the only reason I pulled away is because I wanted more of you?”

Satoru’s back freezes as he sets the towel aside. At this point, your heart is pulsing on your tongue, and you dig your nails onto your thighs when Satoru sits down next to you, right next to you. He’s silent the whole time; eyes calculatedly piercing through yours. Your breath hitches when his hands that are burning hot against your cold skin cups your jaw before his thumb runs across your lips, his eyes turning dark at your reactions.

“And what if I said I felt the same way?”

“I,” you gasp, closing your eyes because it all feels so surreal. “I like you, Satoru. I like you a lot and I—” he doesn’t let you finish. Soon, you find yourself in his lap with his hands cupping your cheeks while he smashes his lips onto yours.

Satoru is absolutely feral. He’s breathing hard and almost angry, even, with the way his teeth are biting down to nibble on your lips. You moan when he drags you closer, your clothed centre rubbing on his thigh with delicious friction. “You have no idea,” he rasps down on your lips, “how much I’ve fucking liked you ever since we were kids,” Satoru pushes his hoodie aside, revealing your sweet neck to him, and he doesn’t waste his time in sucking and abusing the poor flesh so he can mark you as his. “I’ve always wanted you, Y/N, it’s always you, always you.”

You fist his hoodie when Satoru sinks his teeth down into the juncture of your neck, his hands curious and exploring every inch of your body. He knows you’re naked underneath his clothes, but it’s a different thing when he actually feels your breasts right on his palm. Satoru tweaks the hardened bud in his fingers, growling when you moan at the contact and use his thigh to get off.

“You—” you gasp as you expose your neck to him, wild and needy as you keep rubbing your heat over his thigh. “—talk way too fucking much,” you scold, finally pushing his lips away from your neck. Satoru chuckles at your eagerness but you silence him by flinging his boxers off of your body and somewhere far away, exposing your heat slick with arousal right in front of him. His pupils blow in excitement, hands coming up to grab at your hips, but his attention is taken away when you nibble on his ear to whisper, “Shut up and fuck me.”

The simple command is enough to make his patience snap. In a flash, you’re pinned underneath him, whining and moaning when his finger meets no resistance as he slips it inside. “You’re that needy, huh?” he laughs even louder when you lose it, humping yourself on his finger because it’s not enough.

“Satoru,” you beg, clutching his bicep when he adds another finger in. “More.”

His fingers are so long, hitting places that your small ones could never reach. He begins to scissor his way in, his fingers deliciously rubbing against your velvety walls while pumping them inside and out in a speed that causes you to squelch around him.

It’s absolutely lewd how you’re eagerly spread out before him, but your head is clouded with lust, no longer hindered by shyness out of your need to cum. Your chest is rising heavily, his thumb now rubbing against your clit as he coaxes you to cum. “Tell me what you want, baby,” he kisses your cheeks, eyelids, nose, anywhere but your lips, his voice so gentle and innocent as if he’s not knuckle deep inside you. “Tell me how you want me.”

“Inside,” you whine, gasping when he brushes against a really sensitive spot that has you clamping down on him. “‘Toru, fuck, just fuck me.”

“Beg for it,” he smiles against your skin, relentless and harsh as he keeps pushing inside you. You feel him everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Another finger adds in until you’re dripping enough on his palm and staining the couch, but neither of you care. “I said, beg for it.”

“No,” you hold back, nearly crying out when he pulls your fingers out of you. That sudden emptiness is back again, but you don’t want to beg. You’ve never begged another man before, and this won’t be the first time you’ll be doing so either. You refuse to let him have the upper hand despite the crystal clear fact you’re already soaking wet for him, but because you’re stubborn, you only fumble with his sweatpants to spring his cock free.

He’s already dripping with pre-cum from the slit, his cock hard and angry. Despite his arousal, Satoru stops you from going further, using only one hand to trap both your wrists. “Beg for it,” he demands again, his other fist already pumping down on his shaft.

You nearly cry at the sight. Both of you are aware that Satoru is capable of pleasuring himself, but it’s not that easy for you. Your small, dainty fingers will never be parallel to the pleasure his long cock could give you. All you had to do was beg for it. He’s right there, within reach, if only you’d just –

Impatient for your answer, Satoru takes you by the hips and discards your hoodie in the process, sinking you down his cock, inch by delicious inch. You don’t hold back from the sensual and high-pitched moan that leaves your lips. He’s long, and the tip of his cock just about brushes your cervix when he bottoms out. He feels so good, so warm and huge and filling you up right where you want him to be. Your head falls down on his shoulder as you begin to roll your hips, but Satoru has had enough.

“Fuck, look at you,” he presses on the bulge of his cock visible through your abdomen. “You’re so fucking small – how do you take me so well? I could ruin you. Do you want that? Do you want me to ruin you?”

“Yes, yes, fuck.”

“You think you can just leave me hanging like that, huh?” he slaps your ass, eliciting another moan from you and making you clench around his cock. Satoru falters for a moment. Before you can react, he stands up, your legs wrapped around his waist with nothing but his tip hitting inside you. “You’ve been so fucking mean – leaving me wanting you like that and ignoring me for days. Do you think you deserve this, huh?” Satoru kicks his door open at the same time he loosens his hold around your ass, making you slide down his length the next second.

“Oh, fuck,” you cry out just as Satoru begins to bounce you, your breasts following the motion of him fucking deep into you. “Fuck, Toru, that’s too—”

He’s so eager to fuck you, to make a mess out of you and have you losing your mind over his cock that he doesn’t even wait until you’re both on the bed. You no longer register when your back hits the pillow, or how your arms are frozen when he pins it above your head.

“You’re so beautiful,” he praises as he watches you clench around him. You’re so small and his eyes zero in on the way your abdomen bulges then flattens again every time he pounds into you, rolling his hips in a way that has you screaming and thighs quaking. “Beautiful, beautiful, perfect,” the moment his hands grip at your hips to pin you down, you know he’s not going to stop. And you don’t want him to.

Satoru latches his lips around your right breast, gently grazing his teeth over it while his other hand pinches and rolls the pebbled nipple between his fingers. He feels so good – and you’re crying already by the time you wrap your legs around him to pull him closer.

The room is filled with the smell of sex, the sound of skin slapping against skin combined with his breathy grunts and your moans like heaven on his ears. Satoru wants you to feel how much he loves you – how much he adores you – and the pace he sets is torturous. He snaps his hips against yours and presses down on the bulge of his cock through your belly, chuckling when you tighten more around him.

Your head lols to the side, tears falling down your pretty face because of how rough he’s being. But you don’t complain, not when he’s filling you in so deep and he’s kissing you everywhere, touching you everywhere, making you feel nothing else and nobody else but him.

“You’re amazing,” he rasps, watching the way your tight cunt sucks him in greedily as if you don’t want him to go anywhere else. “You take me in so well – you really want me to destroy you, huh?”

“Satoru, please,” you finally plead, “I-I’m cumming, I want you, I need you, oh,” you squeal when he finally lets your arms free. You look so precious, so innocent, and he doesn’t let up his pace. He plants his feet into the ground and his strokes begin to grow sloppy, your tight walls encouraging him to go faster, go deeper.

If possible, Satoru is only even more fuelled with the way you look so precious and innocent in that moment. His touch is gentle in comparison to the way he’s mercilessly plowing into you, using his thumb to wipe away the tears streaming down your cheeks. He knows he’s too big for you, that much is obvious from how much you’re already overstimulated just by his size, but your nails sink down on the flesh of his ass as a silent plead for more.

“Fuuuuck, I’m so close!”

“Yeah?” He fondled your clit, loving the sight of your small body creaming down on his cock. “Come for me, sweet girl. I want to feel you coming on my cock. Come on, tell me you’re mine. You’re made me for aren’t you?”

“Yes, Satoru, fuck,” you squeal, throwing your head back for a second when he keeps hitting your g-spot that has you seeing stars. Your toes curl and your hands fist the sheets behind you as he keeps impaling you with his cock right then and there.

You looked perfect; so perfect to him that he’s basically using you for his own pleasure at this moment. Your orgasm hits you like a tidal wave, back arching and nipples brushing against his chest.

In that moment, you grow needy to have him even closer, tilting up to blindly search for his lips. Satoru complies; leaning down and leaving open mouthed breathy kisses that’s a mix of you moaning and crying around him, while he struggles to do so when he’s cursing at the feeling of you coating his cock with your juices. Satoru looks down at your tiny frame trapped in his arms, his voice husky as he groans once he saw both of your arousal absolutely leaking out of your wet cunt.

He’s so close but you’re already over the edge, scratching at his back at the overstimulation. You’re still so sensitive from when you came and Satoru doesn’t slow one down one bit. He loses his rhythm as his thrusts go sloppy, and Satoru buries his face in your neck as his cock twitches inside you until he bursts with his cum leaking out of your hole.

Satoru’s arms give out beneath you, his chest colliding with yours but not enough that he’s crushing you with his weight. You’re both breathing hard and panting, his dick softening inside you.

He pulls back a moment later to slide out his sensitive cock, wincing while he watches pools of cum gather in your pussy before it drips out. It isn’t until he’s witnessing the mess he’s made he realizes how you’ve been so good for him; taking him all the way in despite your quivering frame. It dawns on him now just how tiny you are when he pulls you close to him; you’re practically hanging off his chest with how small your body is.

He wonders how you’re able to fit all of him, but he’s grateful nevertheless. Satoru shows his appreciation by peppering kisses all over your face, his hand snaking down to caress your inner thighs.

“Hmm,” you moan into the kiss, jolting when his knuckles brush against your sensitive clit. “Satoru, no,” you whine while pushing his hand away, and he shushes you with another kiss. “’M too sensitive, please...”

“It’s fine, cupcake, it’s fine,” his nickname for you is back again, and you lean closer to him just as he begins to massage your sore legs. “You did so well for me, cupcake, you know that? You’re such a good girl for me,” too fucked out to have a comprehensive answer, you only nod in response, spreading your legs open again and ignoring the warm stickiness between your thighs as Satoru kneads your abused flesh. You feel him kiss your temple before he leaves to get a towel and cleans you up. Meanwhile, you’re so tired you’re about to doze out in his bed.

“Hey,” he soothes, bundling you up in his arms until you’re tucked in the safety of his body. So small, he coos inside his head, watching as you fold yourself even smaller while your eyes flutter. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” you sigh into his shoulder, “I feel good. Thank you.”

Satoru doesn’t really know what you’re thanking him for. He feels like he’s the one who’s mostly indebted to you after everything you’ve done for him. You’ve already fallen asleep before he gets the chance to tell you how he feels, so Satoru only covers you both under his blanket, making sure there’s no more space between you out of fear you’ll distance yourself from him again.

But he doesn’t have to worry about that because you’re right next to him, and you’re never out of reach.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Some Game HC's I have about Riddler:

BTAS Riddler loves playing DnD both as a player (always a caster) and as the DM. He is a game developer in the 90's so you bet your ass he was the fliperama kid. Everyday he went to the local game station (and later started exploring and looking for different ones all across Gotham) with only one coin. He played once against a player in a winning streak beting coins and he always won and would accept bets from challengers. He was abble to play all day with only one coin because he never lost a bet.

Gotham Riddler is another DnD nerd and a gamer. But I think he had more money growing up than BTAS Riddler and actually played games in a gameboy. He got a summer job so he could buy more games than Mario and Pokemon. Also I'm sorry but Gotham Riddler never played DnD, that man was born to be a DM and is likely the one DM that didn't became one because it's harder to find a DM than a party so you DM once and now that's your fate.

Arkham Riddler plays Magic The Gathering. He also plays DnD and he is the insufurable player that goes out of the way to create the most OP characthers completly full of combos and makes everything boring for everyone else because he slays too hard. He is insuferable playing Magic as well but at least he is being insuferable against his adversaries. He lost his original deck after being arrested the first time and somehow it ended on young Barbara Gordon's hands. The small time period were pre teen Barbara was the biggest Magic nerd and forced a confused Jim to play was probably the worst thing Riddler ever did to comissioner Gordon and that includes killing his co-workers and friends. Later Barbara went to play it with Jason and Tim (who she isn't dating cause ew), Bernard joined at some point.

The last DnD player is Unburied Riddler who is the opposite to Arkham: he always plays as a bard and he is the biggest follower of the rule of cool/the wonders of RP ever. He knows the rule book upside down but he never really followed the rules, he just sweet talks the DM and the tabble into letting him role for his insane plans to the point that after he basically forced Barbara and Bruce to play with him (Barbara asked Montoya to DM) no one on the tabble even knew what bardic inspiration actually did until Alfred heard them playing and as a closeted DnD nerd got incrisingly distressed by Eddie's "gameplay style". Since then Montoya joined the tabble as a paladim and Alfred is the DM. Instead of analysing what to pick to upgrade his characther Eddie spends all the time trying to find ways to sweet talk Alfred (the hardest DM to bullshit ever) into letting him do his thing. Right now his best trick is to make Bruce either join or get excited for the result because Alfred has a soft spot for his son Master Bruce.

Zero Year Riddler for all his cool persona is a nerd and not only he colects all different editions of War (yes the boardgame, the ancient Greece one is his favorite) but he plays competitive Pokemon (both online and the card game). While he is a good Pokemon player he did lose to an incredible good 12yo and he cried a whole day before trying to extract revenge. Unfortunaly for Ed the kid was from Metropolis and there was a change, small as it was, that Superman could get involved and Eddie isn't really one to get his ass beat by Superman.

Still on the card games BTAA Riddler plays Yu-Gi-Oh. He somehow understands the rules and is good on it. Miss Tuesday used to make fun of him for it until Autum acidentaly introduced her to Bakugan. If you play Bakugan you can't make fun of other people's card game choices. BTAA Riddler also plays Pokemon Go, he started because he thought it was hip and cool (he isn't even that old, he is like 30 but he just wants to be cool with the teens that badly already) and kept going because he really likes to take random pictures of pokemon on normal day things, he also loves shinny hunting. He does it on the actual game as well. He never actually played the whole Pokemon story, he just shinny hunts a lot and stops playing after he catched enough cool shinnies. He has some of the first one to capture the shinng videos and a shinny hunting secret twitter.

[Not a Riddler one but BTAS Joker also plays Yu-Gi-Oh because one has to be mad to understand all the different invocation rules (I say that as a former Yu-Gi-Oh nerd). Harley also plays Yu-Gi-Oh on BTAS but she downplays her talents to let Joker win when she is actually insanely good at it.]

[chainsawctopus]

Do you have Asa or any part 2 character's headcanons?

I loooooove the part 2 gang, and I've posted a bunch of hcs for them on Twitter a month ago! I'll copy and paste it all here

Warning, it's mostly Yoshida because my god I'm insane about him and I apologize

-Octopi are intelligent creatures so Yoshida's contract with the octopus devil is for him to get good grades because it doesnt want to work with a dumb human

-Yoshida ONLY drinks iced coffee, he can tolerate room temp but never hot

-Yoshida really likes cold food in general

-As a kid, Asa knew running while holding scissors is bad so she never did it because she knew she'd trip with them, but in grade school she probably tripped and got hurt anyway from a nearby classmate holding scissors

-Yoshida likes lemon lime sodas because I like lemon lime sodas no other reason it's just true

-Nayuta is a selective mute, but she and Denji click so well that he immediately knows if she needs anything even if she doesnt say or sign anything

-As reckless as he is sometimes, Denji is still very good at taking care of Nayuta, he learned a lot from Aki and from taking care of all the dogs. THIS I'm quite sure is basically canon, even just from the small glimpse of them together in ch97

-If CSM took place in modern times, Yoru is SHIT at video games and Asa is average (hi, not part of the original twt thread, I just remembered that csm doesn't take place THAT long ago and that Denji and Power literally bought a video game console with... Aki's money... So yeah the modern times part was a little dumb of me, but it still applies to some of the hcs ahead)

-Denji spams buttons in fighting games and Yoshida has combos memorized, but somehow he still loses to Denji sometimes

-Yuko is better than all of them and is probably a speedrunning champion

-If all four (five w yoru) of them played games together, Denji and Asa would be at each other's throats while Yoshida and Yuko silently keep playing and win in the end

-Yoru:"I WANT TO KEEP PLAYING!"

Asa:"YORU IT'S BEEN HOURS, IT'S MY TURN TO PLAY ALREADY"

-Remember the doom & acnh thing back then? Yeah Yoru is the one buying acnh and Yuko is the one buying doom

-Yoshida is a rhythm gamer and has spent hundreds of hours on his favs, BUT HE REFUSES TO TRY OSU.

-Denji unironically likes cbat

-Yuko would secretly be one of those popular vocaloid producers that make songs with really dark themes

-Asa listens to her songs a lot without knowing it's Yuko

-Oopsie I just made a fanfic prompt by accident lol feel free to steal the idea

That's the original thread! Here's a couple more hcs I have though, mostly just lgbtq hcs:

-Yuko is nonbinary (in the same way she can't understand people, she can't understand gender roles and all that dumb shit cishets push)

-Related to that last part, Yuko is autistic! It was genuinely my first thought when I read the "I don't understand people" line in 105, I love her so dearly (also I'm also a nonbinary autistic so I'm projecting a little)

-Yoshida is gay and grey aromantic (grayromantic?? Forgot the term) (Also projecting except I'm bi instead of gay, u can tell I love projecting onto my scrimblos)

-Yukoasa are bi4les! Asa is bi but is sapphic leaning after the interaction that is ch104 JSJSKFJDJ she really thought man, men aren't worth it and just visited yuko

-Asa is transfem!! Idk I just saw the flashbacks she had and how she had short hair at one point and I was like hmm and my transfem moots agreed (That post blew up a little actually and some people genuinely thought I was weird or that I was stereotyping cause of the short hair, so I don't talk about this hc that often. I genuinely would've headcanoned her as transfem before I even saw the short hair though, I love hitting csm characters with the transification beam.)

-Speaking of, Yoshida is transmasc! He's a reincarnation of Togata from Fire Punch that was able to successfully transition (socially at least), and he binds! This is one of my fav hcs cause god I love Togata and Yoshida's eerieness in part 1 is really EXTREMELY similar to Togata, and they both have really similar features like black eyes and hair, the fringe between their eyes, the mole under their lip, AND THE WAY THEY SMILE??? I genuinely no joke think Yoshida was meant to be a nod to Togata back when Fujimoto drew him in part 1

-Back to the videogames thing, Asa would be 1st in Mario Kart then fuck up last minute right before she reaches the finish line, and she ends up in last place. My girl trips at the worst time even in video games 💀

Okaaaay brain empty now, hope you enjoyed all these hcs!!