#he would legalize drugs and abortion. hell he would make abortion legal even after the baby is born

[scarycranegame]

mr. frog for democratic nominee

[mariacallous]

For a decade, the husband of Michelle Bulang, a 44-year-old mother of four, made her life hell. He drank and gambled, failing to provide for her or their four children, even as he forbade her to work. He was also regularly abusive “physically, emotionally, verbally, and sexually,” Bulang said, choking back tears. Once, he poured boiling water all over her—her back and legs still bear the scars.

Bulang has since escaped the relationship and not seen her abuser in years, but on paper she is still married to him. The overwhelming power of the Catholic Church in the Philippines means divorce is not legal. That might be about to change. A divorce bill has passed the House of Representatives and faces the Senate, as the power of the church wanes.

“There are two policies which are seen as a litmus test of Catholic influence. The first is abortion, which is forbidden in the Constitution. And the second is divorce,” said Manolo Quezon III, a former speechwriter for Philippine President Benigno “Ninoy” Aquino Jr. There are only two countries in the world where divorce is still not legal—the Vatican City and the Philippines. Other heavily Catholic nations legalized the practice long ago, such as Ireland in 1995 and Spain in 1981. But the lingering influence of the church in a country where nearly 80 percent of the population is Catholic is proverbial.

Yet, from 1917 to 1949, divorce was legal in the Philippines. The right was only abolished in 1949 as U.S. control ended and the anti-clerical legacies of the Philippine Revolution faded. Under the dictatorship of Ferdinand Marcos Sr., the church became a locus for democratic opposition—even as the president was rumored to keep a divorce bill in his desk to brandish at bishops during meetings when he wanted to keep them in line.

The 1986 People Power Revolution that saw the end of Marcos also saw the peak of church authority. The revered Cardinal Jaime Sin, archbishop of Manila, called people to the streets to protest a rigged election. The Philippines faced a potential Tiananmen moment as tanks rolled. But they stopped as nuns praying the rosary knelt in front of the troops and crowds linked their arms behind them. Marcos fell and fled into exile. The new President Corazon “Cory” Aquino, known for her devotion, inaugurated a new constitution that enshrined democracy, banned abortion, and committed to preserving the family.

Those days are fading. “There is a realization that the Philippines is a secular state, and it should not be subscribing to church principles or doctrines, which we respect but not must not control the policymaking processes,” said Rep. Edcel Lagman, who has helped spearhead the divorce bill. On May 22, the bill narrowly passed the House of Representatives with 131 votes in favor, 109 against, and 20 abstaining.

Under the current system, Muslims, who make up about 5 percent of the country’s population, are allowed to divorce. For Christians, their options are to either having their marriage annulled through a civil court, modeled on the Catholic process—reasons including bigamy, psychological incapacity at time of marriage, or use of fraud or threats—or filing for separation—reasons including physical abuse, adultery, abandonment, homosexuality, and drug addiction and alcoholism. The new bill would allow people who currently seek separation for these reasons to now simply seek divorce.

The inadequacies of this system are well understood. It is both extremely expensive and very slow-moving, leaving victims, usually women, trapped in marriages to monsters. Stella Sibonga, a 47-year-old mother of three, has had nothing to do with her husband for decades. Dug out of hiding and marched to the altar after he got an 18-year-old Sibonga pregnant, he took his vows drunk and proceeded to abuse Sibonga and the children she bore. Out of despair, she twice attempted suicide. Later, he tried to kill her and her children with a machete.

In 2005, at age 27, Sibonga left him, and in 2012 she initiated legal proceedings to have her marriage declared null on the grounds of her husband’s “psychological incapacity.” In 2017, a judge ruled in her favor, but the Office of the Solicitor General, charged by the government with upholding marriage, appealed and won in 2019. The case is still ongoing. Sibonga estimates that it has cost her around 300,000 pesos—over $5,000—to pursue the case. This more than most Filipinos will earn in a year. Her experience of the court system is not unusual.

Those who would reform this system smell victory but are treading carefully, keen to reassure the potentially uncertain. “We sympathize with the concern of some of the conservatives as some states have given divorce a bad name. So they don’t want us to have a Las Vegas type of divorce,” said Paul Roxas, an activist with the Divorce Pilipinas Coalition. A recent poll showed that that exactly 50 percent of Filipinos supported divorce among irreconcilably separated couples, with 31 percent opposed and 17 percent undecided.

Navigating the Senate will be tricky. A divorce bill previously passed the House in 2018 but languished in the Senate. So far, at least seven of the Philippines’s 24 senators have are thought to be in favor of the bill. But four have voiced opposition to the bill, and another 8 have previously made statements against divorce. Still, Roxas is optimistic: “A significant proportion of the senators are sort of fence-sitting.” The Divorce Pilipinas Coalition is lobbying hard those they feel are persuadable and has staked out fall back concessions like only allowing people to divorce once in their lifetimes.

Should the bill pass, it will be the fourth big defeat the Catholic Church has faced in 12 years. In 2012, the Philippine government legalized contraception in the face of furious opposition from the church. In 2016, the presidency was won by Rodrigo Duterte, a man who cursed the pope during his campaign. Church condemnations of the man and the extrajudicial killings that took place in his “war on drugs” failed to dent his enormous popular support. And in 2022, the church all but openly opposed the candidacy of Ferdinand “Bongbong” Marcos Jr., son of the former dictator. Nonetheless, backed by Duterte, he romped home to victory.

With each defeat, wariness of church power seems to have faded. “In the Philippines, there is no Catholic vote—in other words, we should not be afraid of any reprisal from the Church during the elections,” Lagman said. Indeed, he claims that private polling shows that congresspeople who endorse the divorce bill actually stand to receive a bump in support.

Father Jerome Secilliano, rector of the EDSA Shrine built to commemorate the People Power protests, says things very different from 1986. “People were already exasperated with the government” when cardinal sin made the call, he says. Now, according to Seciliano, people are “exasperated” with a church they don’t feel is doing enough for them. “Let’s admit it we don’t have the resources to provide for the people,” he said. “We are a poor country, there are so many poor people, and poor people expect too much from you.” Instead, they turn to politicians who can offer patronage, cash, and practical solutions. “And people have more practical needs than the Mass.”

Cultural change is also part of the story. Gone are the days of Seciliano’s boyhood when he would press his forehead to the hand of elders and all heard the Angelus toll at 6 o’clock every evening. “When we talk about LGBT in the 1980s, perhaps people will still believe us. But now it’s 2024—because of the many different opinions offered, it’s now very politically incorrect to even call him homo or gay.” Indeed, the Philippines is already strikingly accepting of homosexuality for a Catholic country, and polling shows that young Filipinos are among the most likely to support the divorce bill.

Not all the cultural change is necessarily inimical to the church. Pentecostal and born-again Christians are making big inroads among the Philippines. Theological differences between Catholics and these groups that once caused bloody wars now fade as these churches make common cause on promoting socially conservative Christian values. One prominent opponent of the divorce bill, Sen. Emmanuel Villanueva, is the son of Eddie Villanueva, a former politician who founded The Jesus Is Lord evangelical megachurch.

Still, it’s not always so simple as that says Joseph Bonifacio, a former pastor with Victory Church, another evangelical megachurch. These non-Catholic churches are less monolithic in their attitudes. “This allows for other voices, including more liberal ones.” A recent statement by the Philippine Council of Evangelical Churches expressed opposition to the divorce bill, stating a preference instead for expanding grounds for annulment to dissolve the marriage. Given that the grounds for annulment are, with some caveats, close the grounds on which the current bill would grant divorce, the differences seem largely cosmetic.

The Catholic Church is trying to regroup. “The church needs to become a church of the poor,” Father Tito Caluag said. As the man who gives the evening Mass on ABS-CBN, the Philippines’s largest media conglomerate, he is perhaps the closest the Catholic Church has to a celebrity priest. Caluag is trying to take on this task himself reorganizing the church’s charitable efforts talking about professionalization, data analysis, and new fundraising that reduces reliance on single ultrawealthy donors. Notably past polls suggest the working poor are among those most likely to support divorce. Yet it is hard not to notice that the interview is taking place in the Village, one of Manila’s ultraexclusive gated neighborhoods. Caluag explains it was donated by a pious socialite, now deceased, and wryly accepts the irony.

Other tensions will be hard to solve, too. The church must also be a listening church, Caluag says, invoking the words of Pope Francis. “And we must genuinely listen. Because I’ve heard young people say we’ve talked our so-and-so, and he listened, but at the end of it all, he said was the same thing like nothing had happened.”

But he remains opposed to divorce—as doctrine requires all Catholic priests must be. For stories like Sibonga’s and Bulang’s, however, the church seems to have few answers.

[meloncubedradpops]

Repo! the Corona Opera: Part Two Fascist Boogaloo

Greetings fellow Repo! fans,

Here is my second installment of a series of three essays where I compare our contemporary times with the movie Repo! the Genetic Opera. My first piece detailed the similarities between the two worlds, and turns out, I have an awful lot to talk about still. I ended my last article by posing the question, "What went wrong in this dystopia to normalize the concept of death due to nonpayment?" No doubt, this movie is incredibly outrageous on many fronts, particularly within the dynamics of the Largo family. As mentioned in the previous piece, I highlighted the pervasiveness of GeneCo's power and influence towards the citizens in the city (is it called city of GeneCo? GeneCo-land? GenCity? An actual city in Italy??). 

People who write stories often bend the rules to make their story compelling. Be it exaggerating social interactions, creating scientifically impossible scenarios, or even allowing the characters to use technology that does not exist yet. I admit the creators of Repo! applied all those tactics and more, which makes the parallels I draw that much more surreal. I want to acknowledge this before I dive deeper because yes, I truly think it would be impossible to have a company who can offer cheap and dirty surgeries with an absence of debilitating class action lawsuits resulting from botched procedures, infection, or their body rejecting the organ transplant. And while I admit Zydrate does not exist, yet, but we do have a long history with opioid abuse. If you asked me when I first watched the movie if I think the Largo family could be a mirror of an ultra wealthy family from real life, I would have politely disagreed with you. But times right now are freaking weird. A single day does not go by where something completely outlandish is blasted all over the news, particularly in the United States. 

In my last essay I pointed out examples where the citizens in GenCity live a life after experiencing a mass extinction event. Besides the technological anachronisms, society and GeneCo have an uncomfortably close relationship with each other. GeneCo is not merely a corporation that offers healthcare and surgeries, it has an unyielding power politically too. I argue that GenCity is ran by a fascist government that is controlled and operated by GeneCo. 

If you're not a person who is super familiar with fascism, basically it's an extremist right wing government philosophy. I find it interesting that in the song "21st Century Cure", Graverobber says: Industrialization has crippled the globe. Although plagues, war, and other hardships existed before industrialization, that paradigm of change accelerated the imbalances between man and nature. Fascism did not exist until after World War I, after all. Between the world war itself and the Spanish Flu of 1918, there was a lot of pain and suffering felt all over the world. Fascists took advantage of vulnerable populations and asserted that their political party is the only correct party, and those who oppose are considered an enemy. Historically fascist governments have blurred the lines between the spheres of what's considered "public" and "private", and often danced harmoniously with business allies in pursuit of profit. As an effect, fascist governments have required citizens to foot the bill of a private company's losses. With enough propaganda, fascist governments will have you believing that this is ultimately for the betterment of everyone. And if you give them enough time, they will normalize terrible acts against humanity that barely make a peep, if the truth even comes to light. 

For the rest of this essay, I will be highlighting examples in the Repo! movie that correspond with characteristics of fascism, using political scientist Dr. Lawrence Britt's The 14 Characteristics Of Fascism, which was published in the spring 2003 issue of Free Inquiry magazine.

The 14 characteristics are:

1. Powerful and Continuing Nationalism: Fascist regimes tend to make constant use of patriotic mottos, slogans, symbols, songs, and other paraphernalia. Flags are seen everywhere, as are flag symbols on clothing and in public displays. 

The world surrounding GeneCo occupies itself with the concept that this incorporated area derives a sense of nationalism, in the absence of much dissent. If you see below, there is an advertisement on the top right corner that says, "Your Birthplace for a new Heredity". GeneCo is not just a company that sells organs and surgeries. It is its own incorporated city. This ad, combined with GeneCo's relentless messaging that not only did this company save humanity, you must conform to the idea that only GeneCo can provide you the experience of feeling clean, safe, and perfect.

2. Disdain for the Recognition of Human Rights Because of fear of enemies and the need for security, the people in fascist regimes are persuaded that human rights can be ignored in certain cases because of "need." The people tend to look the other way or even approve of torture, summary executions, assassinations, long incarcerations of prisoners, etc.

Being able to legally repossess someone's organs because they didn't make their organ payments is about as disdainful as you can get. Nathan has a whole song called "Legal Assassin", and there doesn't appear to be many laws that would at least have the pretense that these repossessions are remotely humane. There are multiple instances in the movie where Nathan approaches a client who is already restrained, panicked, and powerless. From what I can gather from the media in Gencity, GeneCo proliferates the idea that the company would be dysfunctional if people could get financed surgeries and let those payments go to collections. When you're a mega corporation, they let you do it.

3. Identification of Enemies/Scapegoats as a Unifying Cause: The people are rallied into a unifying patriotic frenzy over the need to eliminate a perceived common threat or foe: racial , ethnic or religious minorities; liberals; communists; socialists, terrorists, etc.

While the career of a Graverobber is certainly creepy and macabre, the idea that they could be executed without a jury of their peers is especially strange. After I created my last essay, my friend Veronica pointed out, that per "A Needle Into A Bug", one of the deleted scenes from the movie, that street zydrate is not actually derived from the brains of dead people. He extracts zydrate from bugs that nest inside the craniums of dead people, which in my opinion is a huge distinction. So who is he really stealing from? Is it morally okay to dig up a corpse to get drug goo to sell to junkies? Absolutely not, and the idea is incredibly disrespectful for the dead. And while I am sure there are graverobbers in this world that likely steal things like jewelry from corpses, I still wouldn't justify being executed extrajudicially. 

Further, Graverobber's relationship with the Largo family has me believing even more that GeneCo needs them more than their media campaign can justify. Rotti has access to incredible surveillance of the city, so you would think he would eliminate anyone who enabled Amber Sweet's addiction. My theory is GeneCo knows that street zydrate may result in more surgery sales. However they want to continue making money selling the lab-grown stuff. So the end justifies the means, if we can associate graverobbers and those who use street zydrate as criminals, we can continue believing that "they" are the enemies setting everyone else back.

4. Supremacy of the Military: Even when there are widespread domestic problems, the military is given a disproportionate amount of government funding, and the domestic agenda is neglected. Soldiers and military service are glamorized. AND 12. Obsession with Crime and Punishment: Under fascist regimes, the police are given almost limitless power to enforce laws. The people are often willing to overlook police abuses and even forego civil liberties in the name of patriotism. There is often a national police force with virtually unlimited power in fascist nations.

GeneCo employs a private police force to carry out law enforcement. They patrol around a graveyard, a quasi-public space carved out for those who mourn. And because there is pervasive video surveillance, Rotti can demand that they do his bidding at any time. An example is his order to murder the repo man. We aren't aware of any sort of involvement beyond the borders of GenCity, but even the concept of a graveyard being a warzone is a special kind of hell. 

5. Rampant Sexism- The governments of fascist nations tend to be almost exclusively male-dominated. Under fascist regimes, traditional gender roles are made more rigid. Opposition to abortion is high, as is homophobia and anti-gay legislation and national policy.

Genterns! On the surface, it’s pretty cool that there is a large volume of female medical professionals who are skilled enough to carry out surgeries. However behind the sexy veneer is the reality that Genterns are not set up for success. They are not provided adequate PPE and work under non-sterile conditions. In the "Mark it Up" scene, one is killed by Luigi. Imagine going to medical school for years and years, only to be tasked with the job of organ warehouse worker. Then on one of your shifts you are stabbed to death because the CEO's son bumped into you while you were working. Not only that, but you are also expected to dress proactively for the purpose of selling the GeneCo product and experience.  

6. Controlled Mass Media: Sometimes to media is directly controlled by the government, but in other cases, the media is indirectly controlled by government regulation, or sympathetic media spokespeople and executives. Censorship, especially in war time, is very common. GeneCo has a monopoly on the media of the city. Politics, entertainment, healthcare, you name it, they have a direct stake in, and control over, the media. We do see from time-to-time tabloid clippings of the Largo family. But generally speaking, GeneCo puts a lot of effort in upholding their image. The best evidence is Blind Mag's story. She is a singer who acquired the ability to see after a GeneCo cornea surgery. And while she clocked into work day in and day out, singing and advertising for GeneCo for 17+ years, her departure resulted in Rotti murdering her. But why? Was he afraid of the things she would say? Rotti knew he was terminally ill when she declared her resignation, and yet killing her on stage is somehow less of a scandal?

7. Obsession with National Security: Fear is used as a motivational tool by the government over the masses. Fascist countries use fear as a tactic to keep the masses scared and compliant. The universe of Repo! is one filled with tragedy. Millions of people have died. I would imagine that the series of events that would lead to the creation and success of GeneCo was contingent upon people being scared for their lives. While dealing with the coronavirus, I find myself constantly checking my temperature, keeping my distance from people, and wearing a mask out in public. The human spirit is resilient, which is how we have survived so long. However sociopaths smell our fear and use it against us. The city of GeneCo is surrounded by plots upon plots of graveyards, signifying the carnage left after their public health crisis. I have a strong feeling that GeneCo was able to harness the threat of whatever caused the massive organ failure epidemic and as an effect created a power vacuum. 

8. Religion and Government are Intertwined: Governments in fascist nations tend to use the most common religion in the nation as a tool to manipulate public opinion. Religious rhetoric and terminology is common from government leaders, even when the major tenets of the religion are diametrically opposed to the government's policies or actions.

This one is going to be a reach, particularly because there is an absence of religion in this story. I don't think religion would be on the creator's of Repo!'s purview, and honestly I don't blame them. If you look at the imagery of the story, however, it is very gothic. We have no idea if religion survives, and if it does, to what extent. I would imagine that people still have spiritual needs, and I argue that the GeneCo Opera is an example of how they get that fulfilled. 

"If you want it, baby, GeneCo's got it"

The GeneCo opera is not your typical opera experience. GeneCo specifically tells their customers to "testify". People are singing in unison, praising GeneCo. Clearly GeneCo has taken several human rituals and blended them together to create an over-the-top entertainment experience that seeks to advertise their company behind the testimonials of its patrons. The benefits of the opera for GeneCo, as a fascist entity, are two-fold: have people associate their most nirvana moments with an experience only GeneCo can offer (zydrate and surgery), and distract them with religious-like concerts so they won't question their neighbors being murdered on the streets by that very same company. 

9. Corporate Power is Protected: The industrial and business aristocracy of a fascist nation often are the ones who put the government leaders into power, creating a mutually beneficial business/government relationship and power elite. AND 13. Rampant Cronyism and Corruption: Fascist regimes almost always are governed by groups of friends and associates who appoint each other to government positions and use governmental power and authority to protect their friends from accountability. It is not uncommon in fascist regimes for national resources and even treasures to be appropriated or even outright stolen by government leaders.

Throughout the entire movie, the Largo family is front and center. We know Rotti is terminally ill, and he utilizes his final moments to tie up loose ends in his life. His children feel entitled to his estate and the company of GeneCo. At no point do we see Rotti consult with a board of directors at GeneCo, a private fiduciary firm, or with any government entity. I would describe the company of GeneCo to be a weird combination of an aristocracy, government body, and corporation. His children commit crimes with no recourse or justice. Rotti kills the doctor who tells him he's dying. Luigi kills multiple people throughout the movie. In one of the opening scenes, we see a photograph showing Pavi is cutting off a woman's face. In the credits we see Amber's body guards lying dead on the floor during her press statement. What sort of corruption took place to make these occurrences so prevalent and normalized? 

10. Labor Power is Suppressed: Because the organizing power of labor is the only real threat to a fascist government, labor unions are either eliminated entirely, or are severely suppressed.

We aren't super privy to the machinations that make this city functional. But there is a clear stratification that has sustained itself long enough that healthcare is not a right in this city, and those who can't pay for necessary healthcare can finance it. In a just society, if we have the means to save humanity, we can figure out a way to pay for it. Be it taxes on the most wealthy or other cost-saving measures, if there is a will, there is a way. However if you give a company enough power and money, it will do everything it can to stay on top. The best examples I can think of would be Nathan and Blind Mag's tenuous career at GeneCo. Neither really wanted the job they were given, but they were forced into those positions by Rotti. Had Bling Mag belonged to a entertainment union, would she have had more protections? Would a proper investigation into the murder of Marni result in justice being served, and the opportunity for Nathan to live a better adjusted life? Rotti masterfully manipulates situations that create powerless outcomes for his employees.

11. Disdain for Intellectuals: Fascist nations tend to promote and tolerate open hostility to higher education, and academia. It is not uncommon for professors and other academics to be censored or even arrested. Free expression in the arts is openly attacked, and governments often refuse to fund the arts We don't see any particular evidence that GeneCo is currently hostile to higher education or academia. What we do know is the technologies of this world are akin to something we'd see out of the 20th century. However GeneCo is advanced enough to synthesize usable organs.  In my last essay, I drew parallels to today by highlighting that there may have been a "brain drain" of intellectualism as a result of academics dying from their public health crisis. Outside of the opera house, we don't see many examples of art in this world. Maybe this is what happens when a government stops funding programs it deems frivolous or challenges the status quo?

14. Fraudulent Elections: Sometimes elections in fascist nations are a complete sham. Other times elections are manipulated by smear campaigns against or even assassination of opposition candidates, use of legislation to control voting numbers or political district boundaries, and manipulation of the media. Fascist nations also typically use their judiciaries to manipulate or control elections.

Based off context clues in the movie, we know that there is a group of voting citizens who help determine whether or not a company can repossess financed organs that are passed due on their payments. We don't know who makes these votes, the election process, or anything like that. So it is hard to say if GeneCo goes beyond their media campaign convincing voters to keep repossessions legal. Despite this lack of knowledge, I would argue that GeneCo wields incredible power regarding the course of elections for laws that apply to them. Okay, you want to pass a law to make organ repossession illegal? Fine, we don't have to offer products on a payment plan. The very threat of being able to take away healthcare is something right wing governments loveeee doing. 

Speaking of elections, the United States 2020 general election is approaching. Now that I argued the ways that GeneCo is fascist, I will tie together ideas from both of these essays into a final piece that I hope you will like. If you enjoyed this article, please send it to all your Repo! friends.

[derivativealigner]

I rewatched the second season of South Park and took so many notes that I had to split them into two parts. Like seriously, I took so. many. notes. And pictures this time. I started rewatching just in case I’d find some cool little facts to sprinkle into my fanfic but I went way too far and now there’s a million facts under this cut (including gay stan, a domestic violence psa, and craig fucking dying)

Stan doesn’t like hospitals, he finds them gross and he gets sick 🤮. Also the hospital in South Park is called Hell’s Pass hospital. Early seasons have the name as Hells Pass but it gets fixed later

Cartman has to sing all of Come Sailing Away by Styx if he hears a part of it. After he says this, Kyle sings the first part and Cartman has to sing the rest. Kyle does it again later, which is kinda mean

Cartman’s mom tries to abort Cartman, who is an eight-year-old child and thus cannot be legally aborted. Later, after she slept with Bill Clinton to change the law and make 40th trimester abortions legal, it turns out she meant adoption

Kenny sacrifices himself to turn on the generator to the hospital and save Dr. Mephesto’s life along with others. He says “I’ll fucking do it” then does it and dies, absolute legend

Cartman gets way too into his deputy role. He goes undercover, pretends to be a prostitute, says “Respect my authoritah!” a lot and beats people up with his police stick

Kenny’s brother first appears when Cartman responds to a call about a disturbance at Kenny’s house. Apparently there are like 10 adult family members in the house at that time. Kenny’s dad has a black eye because Kenny’s mom punched him. She says he can’t hold a job

Token sits in the classroom in season 2

Cartman starts hating hippies in this season, like a lot

Chef tells the boys that the right time to do drugs is in college

Ike’s name is Ike Moisha Broflovski and he was born in 1996, making him 2 years old in 1998 when this season aired

This is probably obvious but yeah Kyle and Ike are circumcised

Kyle says family isn’t just blood, it’s who you care about, and he says “That’s why you guys are more than just friends, you’re my family. Except for Cartman.”

Craig’s finally sitting in the classroom in S02E04

None of the boys like dodgeball

Clyde gets a dodgeball to the face and he cries :( and he’s the only one who cries by the way

Pip throws a dodgeball in Kyle’s face and breaks Kyle’s nose

When Kyle’s mom tells the boys about conjoined twin myslexia (which isn’t a real term) and says anyone might’ve absorbed their dead twin in the womb, Stan and Cartman run away screaming but Kenny and Kyle stay to listen. Kenny even leans in to look at the book “Freaks A-Z!” that Mrs. Broflovski is reading from, and when she leaves, Kyle grimaces and Kenny laughs

Stan’s mom (Sharon) calls Kyle’s mom (Sheila) when Stan is all freaked out and trying to put an icepick through his brain, and Sharon tells Sheila to get run over by a truck. Sharon is pretty mean in these early episodes

Mr. Broflovski doesn’t really listen to what Mrs. Broflovski is saying, bad husband >:(

South Park’s team is always called South Park Cows no matter the sport

The school nurse, Nurse Gollum, went to Colorado State University

I just realized Butters exists. I think he appeared before S02E05 but I didn’t notice but yeah he’s there with the dodgeball team, injured

Here’s a picture to make up for my disgusting anti-Butters bias

Kenny’s dodgeball uniform number is 69 obviously. Kyle is 7, Stan is 4, Cartman is 325

Sheila smacks Gerald in the face so hard he falls off his chair, lots of violence perpetrated by women in this show. Remember, don’t do domestic violence no matter your gender, it’s not cool

I realized after this whole Butters thing that I should’ve made more notes about Pip, so I’ll make a note about his anger issues now. When people call him French, he gets angry and throws dodgeballs at them

The boys launch a jelly roll at Ms. Crabtree and make her crash the bus. They do it just for fun

The kids somehow go to China in the school bus

Cartman references Moby Dick, but he probably doesn’t know what he’s talking about

Kevin Stoley gets named in S02E05 and has his first speaking role when he says he has Chinese parents and after Cartman hears it he immediately says something racist. smh cartman, what a problematic fave

Cartman says “I love you guys 😊” but Stan and Kyle just stare at him and he goes 😐 “Eh, screw you guys 😠”

If Jimbo and Ned really fought in Vietnam, they youngest they could’ve been in 1998 is early forties, which means in the latest seasons they would be early sixties. Btw they met in Vietman

Jesus and Pals is a recurring TV show in seasons 1 and 2. Jesus just kind of lives in South Park

I just remembered that Terrance and Phillip are really old in canon, it’s so weird, like how can South Park canon still be changing, it’s been 20 years

Also the early seasons are casually racist who knew

Kenny flashes his ass on a tape the boys send to Jimbo and Ned’s TV show, which airs and at least 12 people see Kenny’s bare naked ass

Cartman really doesn’t like hippies in these early seasons. He throws a chair at Ned and yells, “Take that, hippie!” (Ned is in a catatonic state and did nothing to provoke this)

Jimbo and Ned live together I guess. Jimbo’s gonna take Ned home and show him some hardcore porn to snap him out of his catatonic state, good husband unlike Gerald Broflovski

Saddam Hussein is in hell and has a Canadian accent and is Satan’s lover in S02E06, I guess he died in Canada in the first episode this season but I wasn’t paying much attention since that’s the Terrance and Phillip episode that pissed a bunch of people off in 1998 because the audience wanted to know who Cartman’s dad is instead. It was kind of a boring episode so I understand why everyone was pissed, but it is funny that Matt and Trey did that so I’m not mad about it

Aww look at them!!! We’ve got background Style, the vaguest inkling of Crenny, and Cartman/Cake

I’d take more screenshots but it’s a pain since I’m watching legally and stupid legal websites block screenshots so I have to find youtube videos instead ughhhh piracy is the answer kids

Apparently there’s a huge waterfall and canyon somewhere close to South Park, maybe? At least in Stan’s dream

Mary Kay Bergman was an incredible voice actor. How the hell did she voice all the moms, Wendy, Shelly, principle Victoria, the mayor, Nurse Gollum, and fucking Ms. Crabtree??? Holy shit what a queen

Kenny has some feelings about death. He reimagines the episode where death boops him to death and in his version, he beats death the fuck up, then has ice cream and is happy 😊 But again, this is in Stan’s dream

S02E07 kind of establishes that nobody remembers Kenny dying because when Cartman tells a story where Kenny dies, Kyle questions how Kenny could’ve died then when he also died just a few hours ago when a giant monster took him

rip craig, he falls out the bus and into a canyon

But it’s okay because it was all Stan’s dream so everything in the episode is questionable. Everything after this is no longer a dream

Pip’s parents are dead and he has to go to summer school while everyone else is having a nice summer break

Officer Barbrady and the mayor are having sexual relations, I’m sure this is the most interesting note I’ve made so far. Idk I’m just writing everything down, this is how I enjoy things, I have no off switch

Ew summer bus stop, cursed

Kyle casually sings little tunes every once in a while, how cute

This is pretty obvious but Kenny likes dirty jokes, he laughs when Cartman innocently says he loves Chef’s salty chocolate balls (which are chocolate candy). Nobody else laughs

Cartman says “Screw you guys, I’m going home” or variations of it a lot in this season

So Stan throws up when he likes someone, right? Well, he’s watching an indie movie about two gay cowboys who start making out and he throws up, which is either a terrible homophobic joke or confirmation that Stan’s a little gay. I know which one I prefer

Kyle says Mr. Hankey is his best friend after Stan. Like I know it’s definitely canon that Stan and Kyle are best friends but it’s still nice to see confirmation, it’s very precious. Also Kyle is best friends with literal shit, so cute 😊

Kenny deaths:

S02E02 Kenny sacrifices himself by connecting a generator wire, which electrocutes him but brings power back to a hospital

S02E03 A tree falls on Kenny and crushes him

S02E04 Kenny falls in a grave and the gravestone falls on him

S02E05 The Chinese dodgeball team throws a ball at Kenny and he gets splattered against a wall

S02E06 Two guys pull on Kenny and tear him in half, as in one has the head and one has the legs

S02E07 A big scary monster plucks Kenny out of the school bus and carries him away. Also in Cartman’s fake memory of Fonzi jumping over cars, the motorcycle hits Kenny and crushes him against a brick wall. Kenny gets smashed against walls a lot, doesn’t he?

S02E08 Flashback: Baby Kenny has a firecracker and it explodes, sprinkling little baby Kenny parts everywhere. Later in the episode, current day Kenny dies when a giant firework snake bumps him off a stage and under a fence, which then crushes him.

S02E09 Kenny is playing with a yoyo outside a movie theatre when a bunch of people come outside and trample him to death. They say “Oh my God, I found a penny!” and “You bastard!”

I’ll post part 2 of season 2 in a couple days. I’m having way more fun writing these stupid notes than I thought I would (also gnomes is coming up soon and i am fucking ready for tweek)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #433

“i really wish that you could help, but my head is like a carousel: i’m going ‘round in circles”

Would you rather visit Rome or Spain? Rome. Do you really care what’s going on in celebrities' lives? Depends on the person. If I have a big interest in them, like Mark, then yes, because I care about that person and want to know they're well. Have you ever broke a plate/bowl? Accidentally. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? I don't think so. Can you do a backwards London bridges? Hell no, I'd bust my ass and spine. Are any of your pets “overweight”? Why the quotations? But anyway, no. Has anyone ever bought you a ring? Yeah. What has been the most traumatic experience of your life? Does it still bother you? The breakup with my first real bf. And well yeah, it resulted in PTSD. It sounds so overdramatic, I know, but I'm not even remotely exaggerating. Live a day in my head and tell me it's not actual trauma. If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? God no, not right now. I am not in a position to be married right now. Think back to your most important relationship, was it all your fault it’s over? My damaged side wants to say yes, but I know to be realistic, we both failed in unique areas. He didn't communicate, and I just put too much weight on him. What was your first alcoholic drink? A Mike's Hard Lemonade. What were the first lessons you ever took? Ummm I want to say choir? Did you ever go to a mental hospital? Multiple times. Do you believe that weed should be legalized? Yes. Have you ever had a significant other with a mental disorder? Yes. If you could transform into something, what would that something be? Uhhh idk. Maybe a cat? Out of 10, (10 being really shy) how shy are you? Oh, easily a 10. When was the first moment you discovered love? I actually don't really know the moment I realized I was in love w/ Jason. It was a gradual thing, so no one occasion stands out. What’s the best mistake you’ve ever made? Well, I suppose accepting Jason's Facebook friend request because I thought he was a different Jason. I can't think of many good mistakes I've made... Even the one I mentioned, it's debatable how good that one was. I really do wonder how different my life would be if I declined it. What do you think of frogs? I love frogs! They're so cute and derpy. :') Who did you last worry about and why? My cat, because he was apparently hiding somewhere and Mom couldn't find him. Who did you last feel sorry for and why? Sara, because of health stuff she's dealing with. Is there a name that you can’t stand but it’s the name of a loved one? It sucks, I feel like this burning in my stomach a lot of the time when I hear "Ashley" because that was Jason's girlfriend after me. But I have a sister with the same name. Are you currently looking for a new place to live? I'm not, and I don't think Mom actively is, though we both want to move. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? I don't think I ever have. Well... maybe once? idr Do you believe there’s a devil? No. Have you ever felt an earthquake? No. Have you ever been on an island? Yes, actually. Did you watch the last presidential inauguration? I've never watched one. Have you ever been a fan of The Killers? I don't consider myself a true "fan," no. I only like two songs that I know. Do you have your own lighter (why or why not)? No, because I don't need one? Do you believe in miracles (why or why not)? No. I just don't. Everything has the have a cause and reason. How often do you sleep naked? Never. Are you looking forward to your prom? If you already went, how was it? I went twice, and it was fun. I especially loved having the pictures taken that I regret wiping from the face of the earth. Prom itself was pretty bland each time, like you can't hear shit and they just play awful music, but still. I was a teenager with a very fairytale outlook on love and wanted to just feel like I was in one I guess. Do you prefer Quizno's or Subway and why? I don't think I've ever tried Quizno's, actually. What’s one of your best memories from during a rain storm? I don't know. Why did you need your most recent x-ray and what were the results? It was to see if I broke my foot, I think? If that's the one, then no. I also had my legs x-rayed at some point to see if they could find any damage there because of my extreme weakness in them, but there wasn't. Do people more often mistake you as being younger or older than you are? I actually don't know. Have you ever made out with someone you weren’t dating? No. Do you know anybody who was abused? Yes. Have you ever touched an elephant? No. How many siblings do you have? I have five I "count," but I do have another half-sister on my dad's side that I don't know. I want to, but yeah... it just hasn't happened. Do you get bored of your girlfriend/boyfriend easily? I've never gotten bored of any s/o I've had. Who do you want for president? I voted for Biden. Do you think abortions are horrible? No. Forcing someone to undergo what can easily be considered a traumatic experience is horrible. Do you enjoy drama? Ugh, no. Have you ever had a guinea pig for a pet? I've had a few. Were you/are you popular in school? No. I was very much under the radar and mostly stuck to myself and a small group of friends. What brand clothing do you wear the most? No clue. Have you ever studied any new age or occult religions such as Wicca? Yes, actually, when I was leaning towards Neo-Paganism. I did research into some of its branches, such as Wicca. Are you a wrestling fan? Not at all. I honestly think it's dumb. What’s the longest movie you’ve ever watched? I want to say Troy? It never felt THAT long to me though because I love it. Have you ever been on a subway? No. Do you think spending a ridiculously large amount of money on one designer item is stupid? It sure as hell isn't for me; I lean towards people can spend their hard-earned money on whatever they want, BUT I do feel that they could still spend their money on more important things. Do you find baths relaxing? No, they gross me out. Do you have any hats? I probably still have the hat Dad got me at a Carolina Hurricanes hockey game somewhere, but idk where. Has any part of your house ever been flooded? Not on the interior, no. Have you ever been interested in learning about murderers or murder cases? Not especially. Is there anyone that you’re worried about right now? Who and why? I'm just about praying Sara's new med for her POTS helps. I think me worrying how Jason is doing after his mother's death is gonna be a permanent fixture in the back of my head... If you won a lot of money, would you donate any of it? To what organization would you donate it? Oh, absolutely. I'd have to do some research first, but the Trevor Project comes to mind immediately, as well as ones that protect wildlife, help the mentally ill, fight cancer... Are you a competitive person? What are you most competitive about? Not really, no. I have my areas where I'm more likely to feel it than others, but it's generally mild. I'm not too sure what I'm most competitive about, but maybe outdoing other hunters in WoW since that's my main class that I've played religiously for years. Have you ever adopted a stray animal? Yes. What do you appreciate most about your parent(s)? The fact they somehow still support me even though I'm like... this. I feel like I should've exhausted their faith by now. Do you believe America should legalize drugs? If you think they should legalize only some drugs, which drugs do you think they should legalize? I only support the legalization of weed. What is your biggest turn-off of a person (besides physically)? Arrogance, probably. Or being aggressive/explosive. What song cover do you like better than the original? "Sound of Silence" by Disturbed, for one. That one's easy. If you could find one long-lost friend of the past, who would it be? Megan. I want her to know I forgive her and miss her friendship. What holiday do you enjoy the most? Christmas. (: Were you born in the state you live in? Yep. Have you ever lived in a house that has been broken into? No, but almost. Who do you know that watches the most sports? Probably my dad? Idk. Do you like South Park? Not really. Are you good at bowling? No. Made out for more than 3 minutes? Three minutes is nothin' lmao. Have you ever gone snorkeling or scuba diving? If yes, what’s the coolest thing you’ve seen? No, but I'd love to. What’s your favorite filling in chocolates? Caramel. What do you remember from sex ed class when you were younger? Abstinence was the only option. Heteronormativity. What’s the first instrument you ever played? Ha, a recorder back in elementary school. Have you ever had a friend break up with a bf/gf for you? Essentially. We didn't date, but that's why he broke up with her, because he wanted me instead. Do you see a bright light at the end of your tunnel? I don't like thinking about this. I can only hope there is, but I doubt it a lot. Have you ever waited in line overnight for something? No. Is there such a thing as being too rich or too poor? "Too poor" is very obviously a thing??? "Too rich" is more complicated to me, as I can see both sides to it. Like it's your hard-earned money, but at the same time, is it really necessary at a certain point? Like start donating regularly or something. Do something good. Do you think having an expensive phone is a good investment? Depends on how expensive, I suppose, and what you use it for. What’s your largest bill? Electric, gas, phone, etc. I don't have any of my own bills. It's embarrassing by this age. Do you like your job? I'd like to even have a job... What is your favorite song and why? "False Flags" by Massive Attack, because it's so poetically haunting in its message of how fucked up politics are. Its monotonous tone also adds another layer of sadness to it, like a reminder of how "normal" and bland and unsurprising everything is, no matter how horrible... I could honestly probably write an essay on how I interpret the song, especially if you add in the incredible symbolism of such a simplistic music video. Are you introverted or extroverted? I am very introverted. If you’re married and your spouse cheated on you, would you forgive them? Nope, byeeeee~ Who knows the real you the most? Sara, really. How old is the oldest person you’ve had sexual relations with? He'd be 27 now. Have you been upset the past few days? My PTSD has been kinda vicious the past couple days, especially today. Then earlier at my nephew's b-day party I had to nearly bite my fucking tongue off with that family's political bullshit. My anger really flared up a few times hearing despicable shit, but I think I concealed it fine by just not saying a word. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever thought of doing for a job? Nothing "crazy," really... Who was your first celebrity crush? Jesse McCartney had my young heart, ha ha. When did you last see or speak to someone you dislike? Why do you dislike this person? Today, at my nephew's aforementioned b-day party. I in specific don't like my sister's husband because he's sexist, racist, homophobic, bigoted... I could go on and on. We don't just have "different opinions," we have different morals entirely. When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? I almost always just listen. I don't sing a lot. Can you remember the last time you felt emotional? What was the reason? Today. PTSD is a bitch. What if you were told that your life has to stay exactly as it is right now, and nothing will ever change? How would you feel about that? Quite honestly, I don't think I would want to live anymore. Have you ever been to the hospital for something really serious? I'd consider an OD on cold medicine to be serious, but then again, I experienced almost no effects from it. Idk if I just got fluids fast enough or what, but whatever it was, I'm thankful for. Are you excited for winter? UGGGHHHH BRING IT ONNNNNNN. Have you ever had a moment with someone you like that seemed like a movie moment? Many. What are you listening to right now? "Down In The Park" by Marilyn Manson. What’s your favourite flavour of iced tea? Tea is gross. Have you ever been to a casino? If so, which one(s)? No. Have you ever visited a sex shop? I haven't. Have you ever ridden a bicycle through a busy city? NOOOOOOOO. I could never do that. What’s your favourite place to get pizza? Literally Domino's, lmao. I am so basic. Do you have a lock number or pattern for your phone? No. There sure isn't anything important on it. What’s the most number of people you’ve ever lived with? Five.

[80s-roger]

affair pt3 - Dad!Roger x Fem!Reader

click to one of those if you wanna check:

masterlist ~ part one ~ part two

warnings: none I guess

words: 2,342

note: Sorry for waiting so long! My PC had a problem and now I'm on my phone so there's not the 'keep reading' option! A request is coming soon!

------------ on with the story, there will be part 4!------------

So after your agreement with him getting back with you legally, costed your mental health which is always unstable and never in good condition. You just have him at your house spending time with your only daughter, whom struggled to bring in this world and he knows it, however, he doesn't really care anymore about it, let alone about you. He just apologised to get back to Audrey. He loves her more than anything, you could never doubt it. He doesn't love you but her and that somehow is something.

He's been around you for almost seven months and to have the facts stated, you did sleep together. That was something you were craving for. You wanted to feel his body on you and his kisses on your skin. But there was something missing. You missed a feeling which wasn't mutual. There wasn't any love from him. You would believe he was just using you for pleasure. But then, you would say he's cheating on you again with groupies. After their new album, he was out there promoting the album with Brian. It was unknown to you why Freddie didn't follow. What wasn't unknown to you, was Roger sleeping with groupies in the meanwhile.

It felt good having his presence at this big house but not as good as it was in the past before Audrey was born. He was so in love with you. You've spent almost a decade struggling with your emotions and the instability of them.

After him coming home again, you both had sex four or five months later. It took you a while to get used to his presence again, let alone let him see your soul and your body. You low-key believed he would never ever want to have a bone zone with you after the divorce and after the withdrawal. But now, things got much worse. Your circle has delayed for three months and you had to find out if there was a pregnancy on the way. You were assured after taking the pregnancy test which was positive and it was the last thing you wanted at the moment. You wouldn't be able to bring it up with love and optimism. Your man didn't love you and he didn't know about it. You had to stop that pregnancy even though you were possibly in the third month.

You were in the kitchen, talking to your gynaecologist but you didn't hear Roger coming home after taking Audrey at the kindergarten.

"I can't keep it, I have to stop the pregnancy." You said as the lump on your throat got in the way. It would definitely be a blond beautiful kid with blue eyes. Roger's genes are so strong and it's obvious to Audrey.

"Do you know exactly the month or week you currently are?"

"Must be around twelve weeks. Please tell me something can happen." you were unapologetically intolerant about it. You weren't into making a second child with Roger. He doesn't even love you, stupid girl.

"Please, pay us a visit, it can't be said via telephone... We will see what we can do."

You made the appointment for the day after tomorrow, wishing the abortion would work, without jeopardizing your life.

"What the hell is going on here?" Roger invaded in the kitchen, scaring the crap out of you.

"Jesus, Roger!" you looked at him frightened. "Were you eavesdropping?" you asked at the same tone.

"I came to my home and I heard you talk about a pregnancy wanting to be stopped. I think this has to be discussed with me too." Roger was legit serious, he even blocked the door so you wouldn't leave.

"This has nothing to do with you." you cold-heartedly said, trying to leave the kitchen but he wouldn't let you.

"I think I helped with the fertilization, didn't I?" he ironically asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, I bet you didn't use protection so you'd leave a baby inside me and then you'd never get the hell out of here." him doing it on purpose and you not realising it, stressed you just at the thought of it.

"What makes you think of that? You are so desperate for me." He was so unbothered.

"You're so up to yourself Roger, you're only here because of Audrey. Just because I accepted your apology doesn't mean I trust you again." you defended yourself.

"Audrey is my world and I don't give a shit if you trust me or not, but you're keeping this child." he sounded like he was forcing you.

"You're not going to tell me what to do, this is my body and I make the rules!" you yelled.

"Make the rules when the baby is not inside you!" He yelled back and left the kitchen. "I'm the father of it and you're not doing any abortion." for a moment you hoped he was telling this just because he was afraid it would go unsuccessful and then it would harm you too. Was he worried about you? No, if he was, he wouldn't talk to you this way.

"I will make abortion and you wanna know why?" you forcefully asked ready to attack. "Why?" he questioned, "Because you don't love me, you don't care about me and I had to withdraw our divorce because Audrey wanted your presence and so did you." you were so heartbroken, your mental health was above zero like it's always been.

"So you did me a favour?" he asked.

"Consider it a favour, yeah..." You walked outside, going upstairs and he was following you.

"So you still think I don't love you?" he asked as you were tidying Audrey's room.

"I am sure about it," you answered without looking him.

"If I didn't love you, I wouldn't even attempt sleeping on the same bed with you, let alone have sex. I wouldn't even make the effort talking to you right now. Just because I'm not saying it and you're not hearing it often, doesn't mean I don't love you, y/n." you heard his voice lowering as his speech was coming to an end.

"You cheat on me Roger." you exhaled, finally looking at him devastated. "I've lost my sleep with these thoughts. I've lost my piece since we started dating eight years ago." you shook your head frustrated with your thoughts.

"Then why did you keep up with me from the beginning?" he asked with his arms crossed.

"Because I was blindly in love with you, I didn't care. But look at me now. A second child that's undesirable. I'm not happy, Roger!" you emphasized your last words and he seemed broken.

"I'm sorry what you're going through, but we have to stick together for our kids' sake." he came closer to you, placing your fingers around his.

"No, don't do this. You're only making it worse. You make me feel defeated again." you pulled away at his touch. You were dying for it, but you had to be fully strong.

"So now you are avoiding me? You literally whined before, for not being affectionate towards you." his face characteristics were tough.

"Listen Roger, I only blame myself for loving you and letting you home again! I'm only doing it for our daughter!" you shouted and left the room and he was following you. Voices, still loud.

"Don't pretend like you don't value my presence in this goddamn house!" you felt him moving his hands frantically in the air as you were walking down the stairs. "You're too desperate and depended on me, you make me believe you set it all up."

"Aren't you tired?" you looked back at him.

"Tired of what?" he asked confused.

"Reminding me of how hard I fell for you? How hard it was accepting all these things the press said about you? You cheating on me all this time when I was home raising our child? Ain't what I did enough?" you asked disappointed. He didn't talk neither walk. He was just there standing and watching you getting pale in seconds.

"Y/n, you alright?" he asked concerned, but you couldn't answer. Your sight was getting blurry and his voice was muting.

"I... I think I'm gonna pass out." you hermetically closed your eyes and lost your balance at the stairs. Holding yourself didn't assist.

You fell from the stairs and you can clearly remember your back and head aching from the fall and Roger ran towards you, trying to help you gain your consciousness.

"Y/n! Y/n please, hey, wake up!" he searched for a steady pulse at your wrists but it was unsteady and low. "No, no, don't do this to me, please, y/n! If you listen to me, just move your lips or say something, just do something!" you could hear him speaking fast and nervously to you but you couldn't move. But you could moan or something. All you could do was just a sound with your mouth since you felt really incapable of doing anything else. "We're rushing to the hospital babe!" he tried picking you up to his arms and ran to his car.

You lost your senses throughout the ride to the hospital. The next thing you could remember was hearing him cry. Flashbacks of you going to the hospital regularly for exams during your entire pregnancy due to the early difficulties hit him like a truck. "I can't lose you too." he whimpered next to you as you attempted opening your eyes. Too?

"Has she awoke yet?" you heard a doctor speaking.

"N- no, she hasn't." A frightened Roger could be heard to you while his hand didn't leave yours.

"Maybe the drug was too strong to handle." you could hear them but not respond.

"How's the baby? Did you check the fetus?"

"It's fine... Maybe the lady felt dizzy and she just fainted. Maybe her hematocrit is low, her exams will show it soon. Is there any event that recently happened and it's causing her mental and physical pain?" Doctor asked interested about your health and you really wondered what would Roger say. He's the reason why your health is shit.

"Um she has some emotional instabilities..." his touch distanced from your skin.

"It could be some kind of depression during her pregnancy. Do you have another child?"

"A daughter, she's six."

"Maybe she was going through postpartum depression, there's no other explanation... And she still has that reflex of it." The doctor said and after five minutes of the talk he left and Roger stayed with you.

You opened your eyes after half an hour and you saw Roger's head laying to your bed while his hand grabbed yours like he's protecting you. "Rog..." you quietly said and his head popped up immediately, looking at you scared.

"Babe, you alright?" he asked concerned.

"Yeah, what happened to me, did they tell you?" you asked, itching your head.

"It's probably due to some kind of depression... Did you got after Audrey's birth?" he asked.

"Postpartum depression? Yes, but you didn't know," you told him without hesitating about insulting his ego.

"How didn't I know about it? It's about you," he asked confused.

"Anything about me is unimportant to you," you stated at the door and you could feel him getting angry with your words.

"I'm trying to help right now, but you don't help yourself."

"You were here when your first kid was born but not around during her bring up. You were touring and promoting and I was here, diagnosed with postpartum depression while you were out there ch-"

"Cheating on you, I know. I did cheat on you. But stop bringing this up all the time. Now I'm here." he attempted calming you down.

"Yeah, but your ego still over the heavens."

"Y/n, stop this I'm only doing it for the kids." his tone got higher.

"The next time, make sure you're doing this for me too because I am the one who struggles every second of the day, neither is Audrey nor this!" You shouted pointing at your stomach.

"Y/n you know I have no chill but right now, I'd have left the room. I could have let you there on the floor you know!" he tried to save himself, you attacked him with words.

"Do I own you a thank you for that?" you mocked him and he was furious by now.

"Jesus, y/n stop it!!" he shouted and you finally shut your mouth. You crossed the line even under your condition. He sat back at his chair not saying a word again.

"Whatever happens, I want you to know that I don't want this child," you said out of the blue.

"Why are you saying that?" he asked confused.

"I'm just saying." you turned your body opposite him, avoiding any contact.

"Don't you dare commit suicide. You've attempted it in the past, don't fucking do it. You have a daughter." his voice was threatening.

"She loves you, what's the point." you murmured but he heard it.

"Y/n your depression is really transmitting, I can't help you if you can't help yourself at first. If you attempt it, Audrey is done." he tried to turn you from his side but you moved your body as a sign of leaving me alone.

"Just let me give birth to this kid and let me die, I can't be like this anymore." you whimpered. Your depression has been around for a decade. Could have been more if your family issues count.

"Don't say that. Audrey needs you. I need you." his last words sounded like begging.

"You'll find another groupie, you won't need me as you did during our divorce or even before that." your cold voice hit him again.

"Get some rest, I've had enough of you." he left the room without saying anything else and you were finally ready to let your tears fall down. You struggled to keep them for minutes. Now it's time to cry without hesitation.

taglist: @bohemiansweede @funitrog

[yundaysss]

AAAA hello everyone i’m peep and this is my bb evelyn !! :~) i haven’t tumblr rp’d in like two years so a bitch is gonna be learnin as she goes but i’m soooo excited bc everyone’s muses look dope as hell and everyone seems so cool and UGH y’all i am so Ready ... IOJEQIQJW but yes this is evelyn shes sweet dramatic naive idealistic and just started her dj career and lowkey has a secret child ugh anyway lets mf GO <3

˖ °╰ ⌜ [ MUSE 3, KIM CHUNGHA, TWENTY-THREE, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER ] hey, have you seen EVELYN YUN ? last time i saw them i think they were hanging around THE GOOD ROOM. they can kind of be IDEALISTIC but can also be pretty SUSCEPTIBLE. they’re often caught listening to HERE BY NAMASENDA ! they also tend to remind me of  NEON FAUX FUR, Y2K ERA BUBBLEGUM POP, CHARLIE’S ANGELS, ZENON: GIRL OF THE 21ST CENTURY, POWERPUFF GIRLS ! let me know if you’ve seen them around, they’ve been working at the championship around ONE YEAR and they’re late for their shift ! (  peep , 22 , est , she/her )

STATISTICS  

FULL NAME:  evelyn  yun NICKNAME(S): evie,  eve,  e AGE:  twenty - four GENDER + PRONOUNS:  cis  female + she/her ORIENTATION:  bisexual ZODIAC:  cancer  sun,  leo  moon BIRTHDAY: june  30th,  1996 PLACE OF BIRTH:  syracuse,  new  york LOVE LANGUAGE:  words  of  affirmation,  quality  time OCCUPATION(S):  championship  vinyl  employee  by  day,  aspiring  dj  by  night DRINKING / DRUGS / SMOKING:  yes / yes / sometimes LABEL:  the  loose  cannon / one  who  cannot  control  their  own  emotions  and  may  act  out  as  a  result  of  this TRAITS: (+) idealistic,  good-natured,  reflective,  loyal,  sensitive,  playful,  reliable,  resourceful,  sentimental,  shrewd,  / (-) susceptible,  imprudent,  escapist,  dependent,  naive,  distracted,  moody,  overemotional,  dramatic

BIOGRAPHY

the following biography page contains the following: abortion mention, underage partying.

read at your own risk.  

she was born in the 90′s, in the midst of europop and grunge. and yet, evelyn was born into what she would later feel to be a very boring situation — two scientists working at syracuse university who were on the cusp of their forties. besides her parents, she has one older brother who is seven years his junior, which caused a bit of a power struggle in her childhood. from a very young age, she felt the weight of filling shoes that were too big for her. never seeing her parents fail openly in front of her caused the girl to have an enormous weight of pressure as soon as grades started mattering in middle school. the pressure didn’t just come from her parents, either. as evelyn was coming into her own, her brother was there every step of the way to push her confidence back down. always under the guise of ‘playing around’ and ‘just teasing’, her self worth quickly eroded until he moved out when she was fourteen. 

which lead to the mess that was her high school experience. it wasn’t long before she realized she didn’t have a knack for school and her wilted self worth was convincing her that she never will. eventually, she found comfort in online forums and social network platforms, often friending complete strangers, which later evolved into coming across profiles of people in the nyc underground nightclub scene. from this, these profiles soon became her closest friends and the people she felt truly understood her the most. so of course, by the time she was able to drive, she decided to sneak out on the weekends to new york city and meet these people.

and, truthfully, it wasn’t bad. at first. they were very welcoming and supportive, and always knew where to go to have the chaotic night they all wanted. they helped evelyn score a fake id (though, to their knowledge, she was nineteen, never realizing she was sixteen the whole time) and eventually helped score her smaller drugs like weed. but after having weed and later trying pills, the teenager kept craving more and more, wanting to both escape and feel closer to the music, the people, everything, more more more. which is where things got rough.

first off, it was inevitable that her parents would find out as evelyn was never good with lying. she would tell them she’s going to nyc to network or some bullshit, she would come home the next day clearly looking wrecked, her parents would yell at her, take her car away too. but she’d always find a way back to the city on the weekends. when she wouldn’t come home for days? and even miss days of school? yeah, they were starting to worry the fuck out. also because, evelyn stopped coming home one weekend. she didn’t answer her parents’ messages and truthfully, she felt like she’d be happy never returning back to her old life. which is why she moved in with her club boyfriend at the time at seventeen.

it was a mature decision for sure, but very reckless. and the severity of the situation did not hit her until a year later, when she realized she missed her period. and she wanted to get an abortion, definitely, but honestly a part of her thought maybe this was the plan for her life. that this would give her structure, force her to grow up a bit, and her boyfriend had surprisingly been supportive at this point; the two still being in the honeymoon phase a whole year later. so, at 3:04am on december 3rd, 2014, her beautiful boy charlie was born. and at 8:32pm on july 26th, 2016, her boyfriend left. apparently deciding to spend some time in thailand to ‘figure his shit out’. must be fucking nice.

it stabbed her to her core that this person, who helped define her recent years, was suddenly gone and she had to raise his child all alone at twenty. the bone-crushing pressure she was so successful at escaping for years returned in full again and she wasn’t able to handle it. she decided to contact her ex-boyfriend’s parents, knowing calling her own for advice was not an option and recognizing that the child would grow up in a more emotionally and financially stable environment with them. and since that day, his parents has been charlie’s legal guardians. though, evelyn still makes a trip to the upper east side every weekend to see him.

WANTED CONNECTIONS / OTHER

i have a page HERE with like four ideas but lets def plot and figure out our own thing too ayooo <3 

also lmk if you want me to give you a rundown of the bio since it’s long :~)

[jeanvaljean24601]

Teen Mom: Ranking the Most Insane Feuds of All Time!

From on-camera brawls to social media feuds and legal threats, the cast of Teen Mom and Teen Mom 2 sure know how to go hard. Moments that made you cringe 'cause they were so painful, or smile ear-to-ear. Scenes that were fights, or made you fight back tears.

The franchise really does have it all, and as such, it's become one of the most entertaining in the history of the reality TV genre.

Below, we look back at some of the MTV gang's most explosive feuds, and however you might rank them, this much is undeniable: Way back then. Not so way back then. Last year. Last month. Last week. Probably right now. There is no shortage of beef.

NOTE: We’ve saved the craziest for last, so we suggest that you a deep breath, sit back, grab a hat and hold the f--k onto it …

When Briana DeJesus joined the Teen Mom 2 cast in 2017, she was not welcomed with open arms. In fact, she quickly became persona non grata at her first get-together with the cast - with one exception. Jenelle Evans, Briana said, “is the only one who was acting like her s--t ain’t stink. Plus she was the only one who wasn’t acting fake and choosing sides.” Leah Messer’s response was to “pay no attention to those who try to bring you down … they’re just envious of where you are and how well you’re doing.” As we'll get to in a bit, relations haven't exactly gotten more amicable since.

Maci Bookout and Taylor McKinney's relationship has produced three kids, and they seem very happily married ... most of the time. Like, 85 percent of the time. Bookout alarmed fans with the confession a few years ago that revealed some trouble in paradise: “Eighty-five percent of the time we’re good to go … Fifteen percent is hell. All of our stress and emotions, we take out on each other. When the cameras leave, we’ll drink and freak out. It’s always literally the smallest things. It’s such small stuff but it blows up. It’s not going to go away.” Yikes ... but at least they've had plenty of time to work on things?

So Jenelle has this weird thing about Chelsea -- she accused her of copying her because she made a website for herself after she'd already made her own, because making a website is something totally special and unique. She also kind of accused Chelsea of copying her when she gave birth to Watson the day after Jenelle gave birth to Ensley, which is just wild. On another occasion, Jenelle went off about Chelsea ignoring her older daughter, Aubree, after having Watson, insinuating that she's a bad mother. Chelsea liked a tweet from someone who called Jenelle "pathetic" for bringing up Aubree, which is pretty much the most she's ever participated in this feud.

This one is pretty weird -- one time Babs "jokingly" threatening to "kill Kail" during an Instagram Live session with Jenelle. Lowry was understandably not amused and threatened to quit the show over Barbara's threats. That didn't happen, of course, and it's no longer an issue since Jenelle and her family are no longer on the show, but how bizarre, right?

Brooke Wehr was never a Teen Mom 2 cast member, but due to her mercurial relationship with Jeremy Calvert, her impact was felt just the same. A few years ago, the couple's engagement ended after Brooke accused Jeremy of cheating on her with multiple women, one being a Teen Mom 2 producer, another being her best friend, and a third possibly being his ex-wife Leah Messer. Brooke even shared a screen shot of a text message conversation between Jeremy and the best friend as proof, while Calvert responded in a drunken stupor that yes, maybe he did sleep with Brooke's best friend, but ... only because Wehr slept with some other guy first. Or, as he put it, Brooke was "f-cking his brains out, every day," and he was single, so "my dick was happy to do whatever the f-ck it wanted to do, and it did." Shocking that these two didn't work out ... but neither party was completely off base with their allegations. Just saying. Jeremy and Leah did hook up.

Briana hooked up with Luis in a bathroom while she was drunk, and she got pregnant. They tried to make a relationship work, but he cheated on her and was generally just not great. He's never really been around for their daughter, Stella, but he did come back around last year for a bit. Briana even decided to give him another shot -- except this time, she got the clap. So yeah, they're not on the best terms.

Devoin is the father of Briana's first child, Nova, and they haven't gotten along for many, many years. Briana says that Devoin is a deadbeat dad, Devoin says that Briana won't let him be an active father, it's this whole thing. However, things got especially bad last summer when Briana let him take Nova for an overnight visit and he ended up getting drunk while he was with her alone at a pool. More recently, she criticized him for not giving her any money to help with Nova.

This feud has been going on for years, but has taken on many new forms due to ever-changing circumstances and new tensions. The main point of contention for awhile was Javi's relationship with Briana DeJesus, who came on board the cast of Teen Mom 2 in 2017 amid a lot of controversy. Bri and Kail are bitter rivals (more on that later), so it's not surprising that Ms. Lowry would take issue with DeJesus hooking up with her ex ... or proposing to her. Kail was so salty over Javi's new relationship that she even canceled plans to collaborate on a pair of memoirs with Marroquin. android tv boxThese days, the two of them seem to be doing OK for the most part, but of course that could change at any moment.

Jenelle and Leah used to be friendly, but then things changed -- possibly because Leah became so close with Jenelle's mortal enemy, Kailyn Lowry. Jenelle has thrown plenty of jabs at Leah on social media, like the time she claimed CPS removed the twins from Leah's care and that there were more shocking details about all that that no one knows about. She's also criticized Leah for allowing her daughter to wear makeup and short skirts for cheerleading. As for Leah, she doesn't really seem to pay too much attention to anything Jenelle's ever said about her, although she did speak out after David killed Nugget, Jenelle's dog.

There was a time when Jenelle and Farrah were friends, but no more -- to be honest, both ladies seem to have trouble maintaining friendships with anyone. Jenelle has made remarks about Farrah's plastic surgery and her adult entertainment ventures, and Farrah has called Jenelle out on her bad parenting and her horrific taste in men. After Jenelle left David last year, Farrah offered her support, then ultimately decided to block her on social media because it's none of her business.

Jenelle didn't like Cheyenne from the moment MTV announced she was joining the cast of Teen Mom OG because of some tweets she'd made about white people several years ago. But the feud really started last year when Jenelle made a comment about Amber Portwood's assault charges -- Cheyenne tweeted that Jenelle "should be the last person throwing shade." Jenelle told her that she had no clue what she was talking about, then Cheyenne hit back with "Coming from the real racist, dog killer, abuser and honestly the most unstable individual I’ve witnessed.. GREAT STATEMENT.. get custody of ALL your kids and stay out of court before you talk about me." Jenelle tried to come back from that by calling her a "replacement," but Cheyenne said "And you're fired... soooo?" Beautiful.

Mackenzie has often criticized the network that made her a D-list star -- she once blasted both MTV itself and Teen Mom viewers who have been critical of her relationship with Ryan, particularly her decision to let him drive to their wedding while he was so high that he lost consciousness behind the wheel. "It’s easy to show the ‘half truth’ and portray it as a whole," Mackenzie wrote in a lengthy social media tirade. "But that’s ok because regardless of what happens, whether right or wrong, you’re considered scum.” She's also accused MTV of making her and her husband look bad with editing, but we'd argue that Ryan has always made himself look bad just because of who he is as a person. android tv box

Jenelle Evans' relationship with David Eason has been suspect from the start, even to members of their inner circle - and their own families. One of the loudest voices of disapproval of Jenelle is David Eason's sister. Her complaints were nothing new - Jenelle's a bad mom, a violent criminal, a drug addict, etc. But just because Jenelle's heard these criticisms before, that doesn't mean she took them lying down. In a public Facebook exchange that was at once amusing and horrifying, Jenelle tore into Jessica Eason Miller, accusing her of child abuse and hard drug addiction. Jess shot back by accusing Jenelle of going to great lengths to keep her numerous abortions a secret. Needless to say, these sisters-in-law won't be meeting up for cosmos anytime soon.

Following a slew of gossip stories shared by her co-stars a few years ago that she deemed unflattering, the Carolina Hurricane unleased her legal fury ... to widespread mockery. Jenelle sent cease-and-desist letters to a number of her co-stars, including Leah Messer, Chelsea Houska, and Chelsea's father, Randy Houska. She also took legal action against peripheral friends such as Ryan Dolph, and even her own mother, Barbara Evans. It's yet another reminder that Jenelle is not someone you want to mess with. Not because there's any legal merit to what she was alleging, but just because she's certifiably bonkers and when you kick a hornets' nest of that size, you open yourself up to all kinds of mayhem, bedlam and chaos.

Farrah hasn't gotten along with her former co-stars for years, but on one memorable occasion, she hopped on Instagram to allege that Lowell is a closeted pothead and Baltierra is secretly gay. Yes, for real. Catelynn was unable to defend herself as she was in rehab at the time being treated for various emotional issues; Tyler simply dismissed Farrah's claims as the ravings of seriously unstable woman. Probably the best way to conduct one's self in that situation, but they don't always brush it off. Tyler later stirred the pot once more when he said MTV was right to fire Farrah for her porn career, to which Abraham responded with an iconic word salad in the third person. android tv box

Catelynn has also attacked Farrah over the years - who could forget when she called her fellow Teen Mom a "hoe bag," or when she pretended not to know who Farrah was and instead started talking about Farrah Fawcett? What about the time that she charged out during Farrah's reunion fight with Amber yelling "TRASHY BITCH"? And then there was the time that Catelynn posted this just before Farrah's canceled boxing match with Hoopz. Stay classy, everyone!

This was a feud no one saw coming. Apparently Ryan was active on the dating app Tinder, despite the fact that he's, ya know ... married. When Mackenzie found out about this RIGHT AFTER they tied the knot, she was understandably not pleased. Catching your husband swiping and chatting with other chicks after you married him days earlier? Insane. But, instead of taking out her frustrations on Edwards himself, she decided to let loose on a random girl he was chatting with online. Edwards' Tinder Girl was the undisputed victor in this one, destroying Mackenzie's argument simply by stating, “Your husband is the one on Tinder.” Enough said, really. Incredibly, they stayed married, Mackenzie got pregnant ... TWICE. To quote the legendary Kieffer Delp, "You know how choices be."

Jeremy has never been a fan of David and Jenelle -- he spoke out against the homophobic remarks that got David fired, and he got into a spat with Jenelle after she was shown pulling a gun on that guy (he called her a "dumb bitch" in case you forgot). Later, David commented on a photo that Jeremy shared to tell him that he looked "like a bitch," and Jeremy went off on him in a long rant that concluded with "keep f-cking with me and I'll fly my ass to nc and I'll show u what kind of bitch I am pretty boy." So yeah, they don't like each other.

Where do you even start with these three? Ryan and Maci have experienced their share of rough patches over the years as they've struggled to peaceably co-parent their son, Bentley, but in the past, they've always been able to sort out their differences eventually. But then Ryan started doing heroin and brought Mackenzie into the picture, and that's not really the case anymore. Maci thinks that Mackenzie enables Ryan, Mackenzie thinks that Maci stresses Ryan out -- it's a mess. The two ladies have said plenty of nasty things about each other over the years, while Ryan went in and out of jail and rehab. Like we said, it's a mess. Poor Bentley.

Farrah has said a lot of things about the network that made her famous, like that time that she bizarrely claimed that MTV forces stars of the Teen Mom franchise to continue having children, even when they'd prefer not to. Abraham also accused the producers of encouraging Amber Portwood to attack her during their reunion show melee (more on that later), and even claimed she was fired from the network for partaking in "adult" pursuits on the side. Even more amazingly than the fact that she threw around the term "hate crimes" to describe how MTV treated her? The apparent fact that the folks who made her famous are actually willing to continue working with Farrah. Or were, until she finally got fired or quit, depending who you believe. With Farrah, every day is another day in the Post-Truth Era.

Where do we even begin with this. In late summer 2019, a 911 call was placed from Javi's home, following a dispute there. No charges were filed, but the truth came out. You see, Javi had recently gotten engaged to Lauren, with whom he welcomed his second son. Not long after that, he got busted cheating on her, banging one of the members of his CrossFit gym ... IN HIS BATHROOM while Lauren was asleep (or so he thought) IN THEIR HOME. As if that weren't crazy enough, he then called Kailyn to mediate; Kail later put him on blast, claiming he'd been cheating on Lauren back when she was pregnant and chastising him for wanting her to "clean up their mess." Don't worry, Javi posted a cheesy apology on Instagram, for everyone to see, and it was all good with Lauren after like 12 minutes.

There's always been some seriously bad blood between Farrah and Debra -- remember that time that she hit her in the early days of Teen Mom OG? Deb forced Farrah to become a mother when she insisted she wasn't ready, she didn't support her after Sophia's father passed away, and she was just generally awful towards her. Things got so bad between them that at one point, Farrah said that she'd wished that her mother would "just f-cking die already." They've been estranged for a long time now, although Farrah does sometimes allow Deb to see Sophia.

Jenelle Evans and her mother, Barbara, have always had a tumultuous relationship, with Babs unafraid to dish it out as much as she's forced to take it. In previous years, they would fight a lot and trade zingers (such as this classic image), then eventually put it behind them. For a good long while, Jenelle and Babs were at each other's throats more often than not, and the stakes couldn't have been higher. Barbara now has permanent custody of Jenelle's oldest son, Jace, and Jenelle has mostly come to terms with it. Thankfully, they're not fighting so much these days -- yep, they're actually managing to get along. For the moment, anyway.

Things neared a boiling point between Amber Portwood and Matt Baier after he vowed that would never marry her ... because she wouldn’t marry him on the spot in Las Vegas, obviously. “I will not marry her,” he said. “I will not marry her now, ever! I’m not gonna let her [brother] dictate my life. That f—king f—got. She wants to marry her brother. That’s who she wants to marry. F—k her. She just humiliated me on TV. I’m done!” Matt, who was livid at Amber’s reasoning for not eloping in Vegas - her brother Shawn not being present - went on to tell a producer, “I don’t care who you have to give oral pleasure to, keep the Amber and Matt wedding thing off [the air]. She just embarrassed me in front of 12 million people.” We’re pretty sure you did that to yourself, Matt …

As if it wasn't bad enough that Matt Baier offered Catelynn Lowell a Xanax before a press event, casting serious doubt over whether or not he remains drug-free, he ultimately took a lie detector test to prove his faithfulness to Amber Portwood ... and failed. The polygraph revealed that Matt made sexual advances toward other women during his relationship with the Teen Mom star, and that was it for her. "Trash! TRASH! I got you money. I got you deals! And you tried to f--k her! F--K YOU!" Their breakup, which was a long time coming, was not undone despite a stint on Marriage Boot Camp ... though she did meet crew member Andrew Glennon while on the set and went on to have his baby. Matt also got married (seriously) to Jen Conlon. Funny how life works out. h96 max tv box

Perhaps the longest-running feud of the franchise, Chelsea Houska and Adam Lind face off mostly through their lawyers these days, because the derelict of society can't stay out of trouble or pay child support. In recent years, he's failed drug tests with meth in his system, and he's also been arrested more than once for domestic violence. Because of all of that, he's only allowed to see his daughter with Chelsea at a visitation center (which he rarely seems to do), and he gave up his parental rights completely for his other daughter, Paislee.

Amber and Jenelle have never interacted all that much since they were on different shows, but still, Amber felt the need to speak out after one of David's many abuse scandals -- she ranted about it on Instagram, calling him names like "bitch" and "disgusting clown." Jenelle told her to leave her family alone, and she also said "You’re the one who went to jail for domestic violence but you’re sitting here pointing fingers at my husband?" Amber then threatened to beat her up, because of course she did. Their feud was reignited months later when Jenelle started saying that it was unfair that she got fired when Amber got to keep her spot on the show. Amber never responded, but a source did report that “She doesn’t feel the need to get into a feud with Jenelle with everything going on in the world right now."

This feud has been going on for a long, long time, and it started back in the day when Jenelle needed Kailyn to post bail for her, but then she never paid her back. These two have traded insults over the years, and Jenelle was actually low enough to leak the news of Kail's pregnancy with Lux. Since then, they've been making snide remarks about each other on social media, with David even joining in to insult her about things like her weight and her sexuality. Most recently, Jenelle took a break from her newfound body positivity to call Kail "a giant compared to me," and Kailyn hit back by saying that at least she has custody of all of her children. Classic stuff there.

Nathan and Jenelle were terrible together, and things didn't change after they broke up. The big issue was that she didn't waste any time in getting with David, and David has always hated Nathan. Like, a lot. The feeling became mutual after a while, and Nathan started claiming that Kaiser had told him that David was abusive. Nathan once even tweeted photos of some suspicious bruises on Kaiser that he said were from David hitting him with a stick, but Jenelle turned it around, suggesting that Nathan was the abusive one. Nathan has been talking about getting custody of Kaiser for a while now, but of course he has his own issues on top of everything else.

Amber Portwood and Farrah Abraham’s iconic beef may never be topped, at least in terms of how it came to a head on an MTV reunion special with the cameras rolling. It was pretty standard - or at least it was until Farrah said that Amber's then-boyfriend, Matt Baier, looks like a pedophile. With Farrah and her then-boyfriend, Simon Saran, just trolling Matt incessantly, Portwood hit her breaking point off camera. She stormed the stage, trying to fight Farrah, hurling insult after insult at her rival, and even throwing a punch that missed. Baier and Farrah's father, Michael, then got into it physically, forcing security to break it up. Crew members stormed the stage to pull Amber away from Farrah and it was all a mess. An epic, chaotic and glorious mess. h96 tv box

The bad blood from their epic reunion fight lingered long after the dust settled and only worsened in the years since.. Farrah said Gary Shirley should have full custody of Amber’s daughter, and that Amber needs to stop "using me to get attention … I want nothing to do with [her] criminal behavior or lying evil groups of people [she associates] with.” Fast forward to 2019, in the wake of Amber's arrest for assaulting Andrew Glennon (below), Farrah said again: "I do not speak to others who are very vulgar and abusive. I haven’t spoken to her. I feel that children, adults, family members, everyone associated should be treated with care, love. And that’s where the society and the world is going. I really hope that, not only Amber, but I hope Catelynn, I hope Maci… gets some help. They seriously need it." Vintage Farrah word salad.

This feud never really stops, but boy does it take more twists and turns than we can even count. Most notably, Javi started dating Briana, and even proposed to her in 2018, resulting in a lot of bitter feelings from Kailyn. THEN, he broke up with Briana and started dating Lauren Comeau ... who quickly became pregnant with his child, prompting more feelings from both Kailyn and Briana. THEN Kailyn revealed that after his split from Briana, but prior to him impregnating Lauren, Javi tried to bang Kailyn repeatedly. After that, it came out that Javi was actually juggling all three women at the same time. Who has the energy?

One of the best, for obvious reasons. As we mentioned, Bri's was dating Kailyn's ex-husband, Javi Marroquin, a move that effectively drove a dagger into the heart of their friendship - whatever that consisted of. They had a very heated argument at one reunion, and at the next, they wanted to physically fight each other. First, Kail invited Briana for a private chat in a room backstage, but Briana left before things could get bad. Later, when it was time for all the girls to to onstage together, Briana tried to attack Kailyn, but security guards were able to keep them away from each other. They don't do reunions together anymore, but they do get sassy about each other on social media!

There's a lot here, so let's just breeze through, all right? Kailyn met Chris at college, she slept with him when she was still married to Javi, and he ended up impregnating her when the marriage was over. He was never around throughout the pregnancy, and she even said he had another girlfriend, though he did show up for the birth and for a little while after. Kail has said that things went bad a few months later, and she's even claimed that he broke into her house and broke a window in her bedroom at that time. Still, she had a big thing for them, and they hooked up every now and then. Eventually, he got her pregnant again, and she soon got an order of protection against him. Right now, she's nearing the end of that pregnancy, and things don't seem to be much better with Chris.

Nothing funny about this one. On July 5, 2019, Portwood was arrested and charged with two counts of domestic battery and one count of criminal recklessness with a deadly weapon after she struck her boyfriend, Andrew Glennon, in the neck as Glennon held their son James in his arms. She then threatened to commit suicide by overdosing on pills, and used a machete to attempt and break into the room where Glennon was hiding with their son. She was convicted on felony charges of domestic battery and intimdation, and she's currently on probation. Later, audio recordings were released in which Amber could be heard verbally abusing Andrew, and in one she even admitted to punching him in the face. There's no contact between them now, and Amber has been allowed visits with their son. h96 tv box

Where do we even begin? Jenelle and David have always gotten in awful fights, and they've only gotten worse as time has gone on. In the beginning, they argued a lot, but a couple of years ago, she called 911 in hysterics, claiming he pushed her down so hard she thought he'd broken her collarbone. She called again a few months later because she'd locked him outside and he was beating the door down. Last year, she left him for a while after he killed her dog, which resulted in them losing temporary custody of the kids, and she even got a restraining order against him after telling a judge she feared for her life. She went back to him, but things definitely haven't been good -- she recently left him again and threatened to get a restraining order. She didn't, and we guess things are supposed to be OK right now, but it's only a matter of time until things get bad again.

[this-is-freeridge]

The Air Between Us

Chapter Sixteen: Mari escapes with Oscar.

Warning: this fic deals with dark themes, including but not limited to teen pregnancy, rape, drug abuse, murder, abortion, underage drinking and underage sex. Read at your own risk.

Find all other chapters here.

Read the better version here.

Mari didn’t know how long she stood there, paralysed with fear, feet rooted to the floor, but it was long enough for Mallory to force the door open at the exact moment Mari tried to slam it shut. She stumbled back a little from the force but recovered in time to take two large steps back away from them.

“Now,” Mallory growled as she stepped over the threshold and into the Martinez house, “is that any way to treat your mother?”

Mallory was in better condition than when Mari last saw her, though that wasn’t saying much. Her blonde hair had been washed, her clothes too. Her bangs, usually choppy and uneven as she had cut them herself, were straight and fell almost gracefully over her blue eyes.

To the untrained eye, Mallory looked healthy. So did Doyle, with an evenly trimmed five-o’clock shadow and a crisp blue button-down. To an outsider, they looked like a normal family, and that scared Mari more than anything; their ability to blend, to lie, so well.

Mari glanced around, past Mallory’s cold blue eyes and thin but towering frame, desperately searching for some way to escape. There was no way out though, she knew better than that. The only way to go from here was deeper into the house and she wasn’t about to corner herself, nor was she about to lead these people further into her last safe space.

“What are you doing here?” Mari asked weakly, though she was barely able to hear herself over the pounding of her heart and the blood rushing in her ears.

Mallory’s boyfriend, Doyle, pushed past her as he made his way to Mari.

“We missed you,” he smiled the kind of smile that, to someone who didn’t know better, looked genuine and kind. But Mari knew better, and his lecherous gaze betrayed any innocence his words may have held. “But this game of yours has gone on long enough. Your mother and I think it’s time you come home,”

He lunged forward and reached out for Mari but she jumped back before she could be caught in his grasp. The thought of his skin on hers was enough to bring the bile back up to her throat. He would never touch her again, she wouldn’t let him.

A sharp pain shot through her as she collided with a table in her attempt to evade his grip. The framed photos on the table clattered and fell. A crystal vase filled with red and orange flowers toppled over the edge and hit the floor, shattering upon impact.

“I’m not coming back,” she said, remembering she wasn’t alone and feeling a little bolder (as though Ruby or Olivia would be able to stop either of them were they to try anything). “You need to leave,”

They couldn’t hurt her here. This was her territory, her home, her family. They didn’t belong here but she did. She wouldn’t let them make her think otherwise.

“Mari?” Ruby’s voice called. She glanced over her shoulder toward the source of his voice, only to find him stopped at the end of the hall, eyes wide and hands balled into fists at his sides. He was scared.

This was his home and he was scared, because of her. What had she been thinking? Of course, she didn’t belong here. The Martinezes were a family, hell, Freeridge was a family; dysfunctional at times but ultimately ready to protect its own.

Ruben and Geny were amazing parents, protective and caring and Ruby got those traits from them. This home was safe for him, had always been safe for him. Now Mari had let these people invade that safe space, not just her own but Ruby’s too. She had put them all in danger just by coming here, and she had been stupid to think they wouldn’t follow.

“What was that noise?” Ruby asked, not daring take another step forward. “Who are these people?”

“It’s nothing, Ruby,” she said, shooting him a desperate look. Doyle took a step closer to her. “Please just go back to your room,”

Ruby shook his head.

“I’ll call the cops,” Ruby glanced at Mari, and then at the man making his way slowly but surely towards her. Despite being four years younger than his sister, Ruby felt some sort of instinct to protect her rise up inside him - though he was barely five-foot, what could he do? Nothing. But he knew who could. “I’ll call Spooky!”

“Ruby, no!” Mari shot back. She didn’t want to involve Oscar, not yet. When all was said and done (and Mallory and Doyle were gone) she would tell him, but if he knew what was happening right now, well...Mari didn’t think it would end well for Doyle or Oscar, and he couldn’t afford a third strike.

“Mallory?” Another voice chimed in.

Doyle stopped in his tracks.

Mari breathed a sigh of relief; shad never been so happy to hear Geny’s voice.

“What are you doing here?” Geny continued, her words filled with a genuine concern that made Mari feel just a little bit safer, a little bit more at home.

“I’m here for my daughter,” Mallory spat with a bitterness that Mari was sure had been festering for almost twenty years. “She’s been here long enough. It’s time she comes home,”

Like a lioness protecting its cub, brow furrowed, lips pursed, Geny stepped to Mallory. For the first time in maybe forever, Mari thought that Mallory looked small. For the first time, she didn’t look indestructible; she looked human.

“Was that Mari’s choice, or yours?”

“I’m her mother; all her choices are mine to make,”

Geny’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline. “Oh, no they aren’t. Mari is eighteen; she doesn’t need a legal guardian. I understand that you are her mother and I can’t stop you from being in her life, but I can stop you from being in this house. Now, get out before I call the police,”

With visible reluctance, Mallory huffed and grabbed at Doyle.

“Come on,” she said to him before her piercing gaze landed on Mari, “we’ll come back when she���s alone,”

Doyle shot her an almost amused smirk, his beady eyes darkening as he whispered, “You got lucky today, but I’ll be seeing you again soon, sweetheart,”

Dread filled her entire being. Her blood turned to ice as she watched them leave, knowing that this wasn’t the end. After all this time, they had found her; she doubted they would leave without a fight.

The door shut with a slam and the invisible hand that had been wrapped around her throat loosened just enough to let her gasp for air. And then, Geny rushed forward and took Mari into her arms.

It was the first time Geny had held Mari like this; like they were family. It was a good, warm feeling that Mari didn’t want to let go of just yet so she let herself be held, let herself be small and protected.

“Mija,” Geny said with the softest tone as she pulled away, “are you alright?”

To her surprise, Mari nodded, despite her racing heart. Maybe she was still in shock, or maybe her mind was just taking its time catching up to her body, but she felt okay; her eyes burned but no tears fell, her chest heaved but breathing came easy. Right now, Mari was in a blissful state of comfortably numb, and that’s what scared her most.

Shouldn’t she be terrified? Shouldn’t she feel violated and fear for her safety? Probably, but she felt none of that, only tired. Nothing they did could be worse than anything they’d already done to her; there was no point being afraid and there was nowhere left to run.

All she knew was that she was desperate to feel something, to remember that she was alive and she wasn’t alone, but she also knew she wouldn’t find that here. There was only one person who had ever made her feel like that.

Itching to at least speak to Oscar, Mari did her best to pacify Geny’s worries.

“I’m okay,” she said, offering as much of a smile as she could muster, “I mean, I knew Trey called them when I was in hospital. When they turned up, it...it just caught me off guard, that’s all,”

Geny’s face hardened, almost as though she didn’t quite believe her. “I’m calling the police,”

“And tell them what?” She asked, part curiosity and part cynicism, “That my mother is here to get me because I ran away when I was seventeen and came to live with people I’d never met?”

Geny said nothing and Mari almost felt bad for discouraging her. Still, she continued. “They won’t help me, Geny,”

It was a waste of time, Mari knew that better than anyone. She had called the cops on Mallory more times than she could count, for worse things than this, and yet here they were. Her mother and Doyle, they were smart - never left visible bruises, always made sure there was food in the house (even if Mari was never allowed to eat any of it), always had an alibi.

It scared Mari every time she saw it, but Mallory knew exactly how to turn it on, knew exactly how to play the caring parent as easy as flipping a switch in her brain. To the adults of the outside world, Mari was nothing but a delusional kid.

“We’ll talk about this more when your father gets home,” Geny conceded and Mari knew the conversation was over.

As Geny marched past into the kitchen, Mari shuffled on shaky legs over to the sofa. Pulling her phone out of her pocket as she collapsed into the welcoming cushions, she opened her contacts and immediately settled on one; Oscar.

Her thumb hovered over the message icon, but somehow she couldn’t bring herself to tap it. He had just been here, surely it was too soon to ask him to come back and see her. She didn’t want to be desperate and she didn’t want to be annoying, but she didn’t really want to be here right now either, and she definitely didn’t want to be with anyone but him.

Stopping her from overthinking it any longer, the couch dipped beside her as Ruby took a seat.

“Hey,” he said, “I know you told mom you’re okay but…I mean, are you? That guy didn’t look like he was playing around, Mari,”

“I am,” Mari smiled at him and offered a small shake of her head, “I’m sorry you had to see that, but Ruby, please, if they ever come here again don’t try to protect me. They’re dangerous. I won’t risk this family getting hurt,”

This time, Ruby shook his head. “You know we all want you to be safe; that includes mom. This family is your family, Mari. Don’t forget that,”

And then, as if that unlocked whatever it was inside of her that’d been closed off, tears flooded her eyes and she swooped down to wrap her arms around her little brother. He was right; this is her family and Freeridge is where she belonged, where she always should’ve been. 

When tears slowly started to fall, that’s when Mari let go. If she started crying now she knew she wouldn’t stop, not for a while, and she wasn’t ready to deal with that emotional tidal wave just yet. So instead, she let go of Ruby, wiped her eyes and leaned back as she toyed with the idea of texting Oscar.

“And,” Ruby suddenly continued, glancing between the phone in her hand and the conflicted look in her eye, “as your family, you know I only want the best for you, so I gotta ask; is there something going on between you and Spooky?”

The phone tumbled out of Mari’s grip and fell to the floor as she gaped at his words.

“I- what?” She stammered; hadn’t they been careful? Hadn’t she been sure not to let anything slip since Mario found out? Though she supposed it didn’t matter now, not since they had agreed that they were together.

Ruby picked the phone up off the floor and gestured to the screen. “I mean, it’s kinda obvious. You’re always with him and when you aren’t with him, you’re texting him,”

“Spooky and I are…” her sentence trailed off. What were they? A couple? An item? There was something about calling Oscar her boyfriend that seemed so juvenile and so basic when Mari knew that their relationship was much more than that. Besides, she didn’t want the lecture she was sure to get when she told him, so instead, she settled on something a little less definitive. “We’re a…thing, it’s still pretty new. I’d really appreciate it if you could keep this between us, at least for now. I want Ruben and Geny to hear it from me when the time is right,”

Ruby nodded, but Mari could tell that wasn’t the end of it.

“As bad as I’m sure your mom is, Mari you gotta remember that Spooky’s a cholo, okay? He runs a gang, that shits dangerous too. You have to be careful or this thing is only gonna end in blood and heartbreak. For now,” Ruby looked down at the phone and tapped the little green icon beneath Oscar’s name before handing it back to Mari, “you should just talk to him,”

Mari went to protest, but it was already dialling so she sucked in a deep breath and pressed the phone to her ear.

He answered on the second ring. “Yo mami, qué pasa?“

A shaky breath escaped Mari’s lips at the sound of his voice.

“Oscar, hi. I’m sorry, this is gonna sound so stupid,” on the other end of the phone, Oscar shook his head to himself - he wanted to say that she was never stupid for calling him, but he couldn’t will the words to come out so he stayed silent as she continued. “I know you were just here, and I know you’re busy, but do you think you could give me a call when you’re free?”

His brow furrowed a little in concern. “I’m almost done here. Are you good?”

“Yeah,” she lied through her teeth, “I just kinda need you right now,"

For just a second, although he’d never admit it, Oscar’s heart stopped at the sound of Mari’s small, pleading voice. It was a dangerous thought to have, but if she asked, he would drop everything and go to her.

Over the past few months, they had spent a lot of time together; he had not only watched her grow but encouraged her to do so. Despite what anyone may have thought about them, Oscar knew her better than, well, anyone; she was strong and she was resilient, almost to a fault. That girl would bottle up all the trauma in the world if it meant she wouldn’t have to bother someone else - so if she was calling to say that she needed him, then Oscar knew something was wrong.

“I’ll be there as soon as I’m done here,” he said, “give me thirty,”

“Oh, no, you don’t have to-”

“Mariana,” his deep voice boomed, soft but firm. “I’ll be there,”

The line disconnected before she could protest further.

. : ♱ : .

He arrived in twenty, pulling up in his red Impala, the sound of the car door creaking open and slamming shut alerting Mari to his presence.

Ruben hadn’t come home yet, but she made sure to let Geny know that she was going out and would be home late. Geny wanted to argue, wanted her to stay home, but she didn’t. Maybe she decided that Mari deserved a bit of a break, just this once.

Unable to resist the smile that spread across her face as she saw Spooky, leaning against the hood of his car, arms crossed, she ran to him and let him take her in his arms. All of the tension she had been feeling, all of the pain and fear and anger all dissipated as his strong arms squeezed just that little bit tighter around her waist. She could do this all day.

But the sound of Ruby’s voice wouldn’t let her.

“Hey!” He called and Mari turned to see him storming out of the house, she hadn’t even noticed him follow her out. Oscar dropped his hold on her. Mari stepped forward, folding her arms across her chest.

“Ruby?”

“I won’t be long, I just have something to say to Spooky,” there was a determination in Ruby’s eye that was only diluted by the sheer terror that was there as well. Still, he marched to the cholo until he was just before Mari, smartly keeping some distance between them. “I may be scared of you, but Mario isn’t, and I know you got some respect for him. She’s his sister too, so you treat her right. You gotta be ride or die, okay?”

Although she was touched at the sentiment, Mari’s face burned bright red at his words. She spared a glance over her shoulder at Spooky; his eyebrow was raised and he wore a tight-lipped smirk as though he was trying not to laugh (something Mari appreciated). Though he may not have been taking Ruby very seriously, Spooky got the message: don’t fuck this up.

The teen stood before them, chest heaving (from fear, the heat or just talking so much, Mari wasn’t sure of) and waiting for a response.

So Mari nodded and answered for both of them with a quick, “Okay,”

That seemed to appease Ruby as he nodded once and then away, back into the security of the house and away from the gangbanger. The moment he was gone, Spooky threw his head back with a barking laugh.

Mari spun on her heel and stood on her toes so she was just tall enough to throw her arms around his neck. Hands settled on her hips and she leaned into him, her lips spreading into a wide smile as she teased, “Ride or die, right baby?”

Spooky rolled his eyes and he shook his head, but his hand came to rest on the nape of her neck and he pulled her in for a kiss. It was quick, over far too soon for both of them, but they’d have plenty of time to make up for it.

"Just get in the car, mami,” he opened up the door for her and she stepped into the passenger’s seat (and pretended she didn’t notice the light smack on her ass as she passed him).

Mari didn’t say much as they drove, and Oscar knew better than to push her to speak. Instead, he turned up the stereo and rolled down the windows, letting the warm November air run through her hair and carry her voice in the dust behind them as she sang, wildly out of tune but happy, or as close to it as she had been in a while.

The car slowed when they hit a straight stretch of road, just enough so that he could look at her a second longer every now and then. Oscar loved seeing her like this; wild and carefree, exactly how she belonged. Dark curls whipped around her face, occasionally catching on her cherry lip gloss, and she was singing, loud and beautiful, in broken Spanish - a language, she had told him, she’d only learned in high school (and that he had been helping her perfect ever since).

The girl in question didn’t know how long they had been driving, and she didn’t know where they were going but she trusted Oscar enough to get them there. All she focused on was the autumn wind whipping past her face as she leaned out of the car window, watching as the scenery changed with each passing mile. Freeridge’s rundown houses turned into tall buildings; tall buildings dwindled to grass and trees and, if she looked far enough ahead, the ocean, as far as the eye could see.

Oscar parked the car between a small diner and the vast shores of the beach. Mari hadn’t been to the beach in years. As she got out of the car, the smell of saltwater filled her with a certain longing for a time when she was younger, much younger, and the world felt so much kinder. But she knew the truth now, she knew that the world was a dark and cruel place and so she pushed that nostalgia deep, deep down.

“Come on,” Spooky’s voice pulled her from her thoughts as he came up beside her and grabbed her hand, pulling her along before she had a chance to oppose, “let’s eat,”

They sat at a booth by the window and Spooky didn’t comment when Mari would start to disassociate and stare blankly at the expanse of sand and water before them. She had a lot going on, he knew that, but there was more that she hadn’t told him so he would give her some space before asking.

Although it took some time, Mari managed to convince Oscar that she wasn’t very hungry (she argued it was the pregnancy, he argued that’s exactly why she should be eating) and they settled on sharing a boat of fries, though Spooky got a burger and onion rings on the side.

It wasn’t until Spooky left to go to the bathroom and Mari was once more alone with her thoughts that everything came crashing down on her.

How did she get to this point? Matter of fact, how had this day even been real - from finding out she was pregnant, to Oscar finally confessing his feelings and then to Mallory and Doyle showing up? It was all too much. She couldn’t keep going like this, something had to give.

“Hey, ma,” a soft, smooth voice called. Her heart sank. She couldn’t deal with this right now and she silently pleaded for Oscar to come back soon, “What’s a pretty girl like you doin’ here all alone, huh?”

From the corner of her eye, Mari glanced up at him. If he wasn’t coming onto her like this, she may have thought him pretty; dark skin, perfectly groomed beard and short hair in tight curls atop his head. But if his line wasn’t enough to give her bad vibes, then the shade of green on his hoody sure was.

“I’m not alone,” she said, refusing to make eye contact or speak any louder than necessary.

The guy looked around the otherwise deserted diner. “You sure? ‘Cause I ain’t see anyone else here but you and me,”

“And me,” Mari breathed a sigh of relief as Oscar approached the man, ever her saviour. “You wanna back off my girl, Easy?”

“Alright, my bad,” the guy, Easy, said (despite the smirk on his face saying he didn’t at all think it was his bad). He shot Mari a wink and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Hit me up when you’re single, or when you get bored with this fool,”

And then the Prophet turned his back and he left, without a fight. Oscar slid back into the booth, reclaiming his seat before Mari, but he didn’t say anything. His nostrils flared and his lips pressed into a tight frown, Mari could see he was pissed.

All of a sudden he raised his fist and slammed it hard onto the tabletop and, although it wasn’t the first time Mari had experienced one of his outbursts, this one seemed to be the thing that shocked her out of the stupor she had been in all afternoon. Everything she had been feeling - and everything she had been desperate not to - came crashing into her like a tidal wave.

The tears started almost immediately, hot and heavy and too fast for her to stop it. Across from her, Oscar’s face softened and he rushed around to sit beside her. Without any hesitation, he scooped her up into his arms and cradled her to his chest. This may not be what she wanted, but she needed it.

“I can’t,” she sobbed into his chest. It hurt him to hear her like this, her voice so small and broken, each breath sounding like it hurt to take as she gasped in air and struggled to exhale. “I can’t, Oscar, I can’t breathe!”

Winding an arm around her waist, he hoisted her from the seat and let her use him as a crutch for her shaking body as he led them outside.

“I can’t do this,” she whispered, more to herself, as they reached the edge of the sand. “I can’t be a mother, I can’t even be a daughter!”

“Whatever you need to do Mariana, you know I’ll be there with you,” he offered, hoping to soothe at least some of her worries.

Mari shook her head. “They’re here, Oscar. Mallory and Doyle, they just came into the house,”

Oscar was seeing red as he asked, “when?”

“Right after you left,”

“I’m gonna fucking kill him,” he was marching back toward his car before Mari could even respond. She chased after him, reaching out to catch his arm.

“Oscar, wait!” She cried, “I don’t even know where they are now!”

He stopped and turned, a deep scowl tarnishing his features. He shook his head. “I won’t let him get away with what he did to you. Either of them, you know that,”

Heaving a sigh, she toed at the ground and wiped her face, gathering her strength before looking at him again.

“I just don’t want any more violence in my life,” she confessed, and when she looked so beaten down and helpless, who was Oscar to argue with her?

Oscar took a step closer and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He leaned into her, close enough that she could kiss him if she were to stand on the tips of her toes and reach just that extra bit further. And then, as the smell of Corona hit her face, he whispered against her lips, “You know I just wanna keep you safe, mami,”

Mari nodded but she found herself unable to formulate a response. He wanted to keep her safe, Ruby wanted to keep her safe - she couldn’t keep putting everyone at risk just to save her own ass. One of these days she was going to have to figure out how to save herself.

With a heavy sigh and one final whimper, Mari dropped to her knees, falling into the sand as though her body no longer knew how to support itself. Oscar followed, pulling her in so that her legs were crossed over his and she was leaning into him once again.

Mari said softly, "I never asked for any of this. I never wanted you caught up in my mess.”

“I don’t mind being caught,”

She turned to look at him and offered the most genuine smile she could muster.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” she said, and then looked back out into the ocean. “I haven’t been to the beach since I was a kid, before things got really bad with my mom,”

“When did things get really bad?” He asked and maybe it was none of his business (and she had every right to tell him that) but he wanted to know her, every bit.

Mari hummed in thought, a quirk Spooky just discovered but definitely loved. “Around when I was fourteen. I mean she was never great, but that’s when she started using the hard stuff, you know? I remember getting on the bus and waiting...I think hours, for her to pick me up from the bus stop. When she didn’t come, I walked.

“It took even longer than it should’ve because I got lost a few times, but I finally made it back. And so I walked into the living room and there was Mallory, getting rawed by our neighbour while he injected something into her arm, right in front of me. That was the lowest point in our relationship, until she let her boyfriend rape me,”

“Mari, I’m sorry,” Oscar whispered, his hatred for that woman only growing but he controlled his rage; he asked, after all.

She shrugged. “It is what it is, and it just solidified in my mind exactly how much I never want to be like her,”

Eyes trained on Mari, Oscar couldn’t help but notice how beautiful she looked basking in the orange and pink sky as the sun set over the horizon - her skin glowed, her cheeks held a rosier tint and the dim sunlight reflected brightly in her dark hair.

His hands came up to cup her face before tangling in the back of her hair as he pulled her closer to capture her lips in a languid kiss. She kissed him back without hesitation, so he closed his eyes and sighed contentedly into her mouth. His muscles relaxed as he let her take over him; the way her hair felt as it fell between his fingers, the way her lips always tasted like cherries, even without the gloss, the way the curves of her body felt as she pressed against him. This woman was his escape, his saviour as much as he was hers and as she moaned into his mouth and kissed him a little harder, he only thought one thing: he never wanted to lose this.

Taglist: @robinsdolan @lostgirl219@kseniainneverland @ravengreystone@weediskindabad @moistdollerbills @javoqetal@kenzie44469 @goddessate@blackdepressoexpresso @classyputa @babygirl-htx @wonderlandlovelove @cacapoodlepoo @agent-femmefatale @elliesshitofablog@daydreamer0307 @lucyfuh @harduy @elizabeth-santana-98 @lonelyyblues

[nightcoremoon]

I scroll through tumblr and it's post after post after post of human rights abuses and "please donate to blah blah blah fund"

I honestly gotta say if I wasn't trapped in a prison of a dozen individual financial, physical, emotional, and psychological issues that all conflict and stack on top of each other, I'd just say fuck it and start doing actual shit that matters and achieves results. starting fires in locations holding lots of paper regarding legal stuff, investing in portable magnetic equipment to fry hard drives, disabling vehicles, stealing drugs and planting them elsewhere, investing in molotov cocktails to throw into crowds of nazis and homophobes and ice agents, making fake pipe or gas bombs to plant at republican rallies and inciting evacuations, amassing an arsenal of assault rifles to incite panic in the fascist overlords' safe spaces, destroy the anti-homeless spikes on city sidewalks, bring down a sledgehammer on the abortion propaganda, stick socks in republican car gas fuel valves and set them on fire, brick windows. fuck it, I'd kill members of the presidential cabinet if it was for the greater good. just... inhibiting all of that evil any way that I can.

there's a fucking reason why only progressives are killed. Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, John F Kennedy, Gandhi. good has standards. evil does not. superman throws lex luthor in jail a million times but every time luthor makes a bigger scheme that kills more innocents but ~superman doesn't kill because if he kills then he's just as bad~ BULLSHIT. letting evil men live to kill more innocents is just killing the innocents yourself. fuck you if you think that killing nazis is ~just as bad~ as killing jews. evil humans kill people for things that they're born as: black, muslim, gay... killing an evil human for the choices they make is incomparable.

frank castle, richard zelazny, ezio auditore... they're killers. and they'd be heroes if they were real. but they're not, because the people who claim to be good don't have the balls to do anything other than make signs and give a few dollars. they're lazy, selfish, spineless cowards more obsessed with focusing on their own lives than about making radical changes to this hell world sculpted for us by whatever you wanna call it. illuminati? freemasons? bilderburgs? whatever. it's complicity, empty shameless pats on the back for helping despite never doing a fucking thing. bigots aren't swayed by logic. they aren't swayed by nickels and dimes. they aren't swayed by any compassionate heartfelt speeches about the inherent goodness of man. they aren't swayed by thoughts and prayers and boyscouts holding hands to sing kumbaya. the intelligent bigots hate from a distance and seek information, like I did when I matured to an adult. the irredeemable garbage, the idiots, the inbred degenerate hateful unchangeable unswayable evil masses just need to be exterminated. they have to be afraid to exist as we're afraid to exist. but that'll never happen.

everyone wants to change the world but no one wants to die? close, gerard. many people want to die because of the tyranny, the hate, and the evil around us. nobody wants to kill. nobody wants to harm, to disrupt, to bother, to inhibit at all in any way shape or meaningful form. it's because we're conditioned by Them, by those powers that be, to fall in line like good little boys and girls. our signs and paltry donations are just distractions. they keep us complacent with the illusion that we're doing anything. but behind closed doors they're just making a new aids, a new gestapo, a new atom bomb, a new swine flu, a new ebola, a new weapon to use on us who don't fit their narrow view of the world.

none of us are willing to step out of line and do actual damage to their machines. nobody has the desire to put spanners in the cogs. nobody wants to bust nazi heads open and hospitalize them and then unplug their life support and leave a card that says "we aren't afraid to stand up for ourselves anymore" written in the blood of the nazi pig they slaughtered on that gurney. nobody wants to do that who has the capability to. only those of us victimized by all of these manufactured mental illnesses given to the poor through the chemicals in all the generic brand food, and then can't get into a college and get a degree to get a lottery raffle for a decent paying job where we can afford to do anything to help out those less fortunate than us, or aren't just carbon copy cookie cutter cishet white christians, we're the only ones who would even consider that as an option, and we can't because we all have mental illnesses that we can't afford to medicate or otherwise take care of and even if we could that's all tainted because the medical community doesn't want us fixed because then they lose profits. they don't give a shit about the hippocratic oath since only the rich can get into health anyway. we're just fucked any way you look at it.

and now pointing it out I'm probably gonna be put on a federal watch list and the FBI's hacker community will just filter my IP address through specific channels to ensure nobody sees this post because it doesn't show up on anybody's dashboard. that or they'll just plant cocaine in my car and pull me over next time I go to work then shoot me 5 times in the back and I'll go down as a statistic all because I dared to say on my private blogging website "man wouldn't it be cool if vigilantism existed in the real world and not just comic books and cartoons" since literal nazis are ruling the world now.

and you know what? either I'll die talking about fighting for the cause, I'll fade into obscurity having done nothing, or they'll activate some kill switch and make me commit suicide, or kidnap me and sell me in the black market. there is zero positive outcome here. the world is just evil and no amount of prayer or memes will ever fix it. it's irreparably broken. we can only stay alive long enough to hopefully help one person, keep ourselves happy and sane, and hope that there's an afterlife of some sort where we can actually live a life free of fear and hate. but that's just a fairytale pipe dream. we'll just die and that'll be the end of it. too fucking bad the gluttonous avaricious hateful swine running this shitshow have made it so I can't even enjoy the blink I'll have on this speck of mud encrusted with the virus of humanity.

...

Ha Ha I Am Just Kidding, Mr Federal Agency Spying On Me Because They Paid Off Yahoo, These Are Just Lyrics For A Punk Metal Band I Am Forming, I Have No Desire To Revolt At All. I Am Being Ironic And Joking. :) :) :) Everything Is Just Fine.

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 190

Trey

"Hold up." Devin says looking around the table. "Trey did you cook this?"

"No." I say scrunching up my face.

He looks at Chris. "Did you cook this?"

"Naw, we just sat down and started eating. Trey, why we sat down here?"

"Cause it was food."

Devin wasn't leaving it alone. "Your mama not here, Cammie not taking the time, and MiMi ass don't do nothing."

"Sevyn?"

"She went out this morning." Chris shrugs. "With Cammie."

We sit there for a few seconds still eating. It didn't bother me how the food got here. The fact was that it was here and I was eating it. Nothing complicated. Devin grabs a piece of toast from the plate in front of us.

"Daddy?" Lane says walking in the kitchen. He sees me and gets excited. "Hey."

"Good morning, son." I say returning the excitement.

He comes over looking at my plate. "What's that?"

"A strawberry." I say giving it to him.

"I'll be back, Bae." someone yells then comes in the kitchen.

"Oh." I say suddenly remembering. "Kain."

Chris scrunches up his face. "You cooked this breakfast?"

"There's a problem with a nigga cooking breakfast? I cook for my family every morning."

"But you a drug dealer. They do that?" I smirk.

He chuckles. "Do they Devil?"

Devin scrunches his face. "I'm a clean ass nigga. I don't know what they do."

"Boe." Kain says making a face. "What's up, Lane?"

"My cousin here?" Lane says paying Kain attention. "Way her at? Naya!"

There's a loud noise in the dining room then running. Man, that's trouble. Lane and Shani. She is a fucking ratchet ass girl in the making. She curses, she pinches, she bites, she cries, she makes pouting I’m sorry faces. Lane brings the bad out of most kids but that little girl don't need help being bad.

"Lane. Hey Lane." she says hugging him.

"Cousin." he says pushing her off him. "Way you Mommy?"

They disappear. Kain leaves out of the kitchen as well. My phone goes off. I stare at Cammie's face until it says missed call. Chris looks at the phone with a frown on his face. He remains quiet. It starts ringing again. I slowly pick it up.

"Morning." I say.

"You sound dry, Tremaine. What are you doing?"

I stuff my mouth. "Eating."

"You cooked?"

I chuckle. "No, really. Let's be serious."

"I miss you. Are you coming to watch me dance?"

"No, wife."

"Why not?" she whines.

I change the call to video. She answers it right away. When the video loads she is sitting on the floor in front of the mirror with people dancing behind her. Cammie is one of those people that is beautiful first thing in the morning without doing anything to her face. When she does it am over the top beauty. She sitting in front of this camera with no make up, sweat, and her hair tied back.

"You look beautiful."

"Eww." She says covering the camera. "I look like a sweaty ragdoll."

I chuckle. "Lane here. Talk to your mama."

He looks at the phone with a long face then he looks at me. "No. I said that."

"The pineapple?" I say giving it to him.

"He took the time to slice the pineapple." Chris says staring at the pineapple.

Lane puts the phone down the run away. "Naya!"

"My sister there already?" Cammie says.

"Yeah. He thug cooks."

Cammie laughs. "Yeah, I know. He does it every morning."

Mommy wobbles into the room. "I still can't get used to walking in the room with y'all ass sitting there casually. Hey."

"I didn't know you were pregnant."

"I'm not!" she says offended.

I frown picking up the phone. "Oh."

She laughs really hard. "Just kidding. I am. My baby daddy can make a spread right? Got it looking professional. He was having fun with all the damn fresh food y'all got up in here. Oh guess what. Twins!"

"That's why you so big." Devin says.

"Oh shoot. Dee, I thought you were a cute celebrity sitting up there."

"Cute?" Devin says making a face. "Fuck I look like?"

"Cute." Chris laughs.

I look back at the phone. "What's so cute about twins?"

"No, Dee is cute. Twins aren't cute." Mommy says walking her belly around the counter. "I'm wish twins on you. It's either the 2nd born or the third."

"That bitch not even having twins." Cammie says. "Maine, I have to go back and dance. Love you."

"Love you." I say staring at her. I wanted to tell her no but I didn't.

"Anyway, twins?" she says rubbing her belly.

I frown. "I'm confused. You asking me?"

"Yes, I was lying before. It's a girl." she says making the ball in her stomach move. She didn't look as big. "She likes to sit with her butt on my stomach and lungs so I can't eat so much. Girls. Already a self-conscious bitch. Don't want us getting fat."

"I would take whatever if it's a girl involved. Then we done."

"At 3 or 4? Hell I'm surprised you got Cammie to have one." Mommy says giggling.

I frown. "She wanted kids."

"Who? Miss conceited? Bitch, ain't never wanted to lose that perfect body. Whqt she doing right now? Exercising. Call it dance... Still keeping that figure right."

"Cammie, don't act like she didn't want kids." Chris frowns.

"Let me ask my mama." I say taking out my phone. "I don't think I ever asked."

Mama answers right now the first ring. "Good morning, Tremaine."

"Must be some new old saggy balls in your life."

"They only about 25. Still perky."

I chuckle. "And full of STI's. Nasty."

She laughs really hard. "Tremaine on the phone. Talking about nuts. You know I always knew he liked bags in his mouth."

"The fuck?" I say trying to stay serious.

"Rose? Tremaine, your cousin said hey. Rose said to tell Lane to call her."

"I'm not because he gonna be talking about going to Virginia and Cammie not having it."

Ma laughs really hard. "We going to a garage sale the church having. I should have got some stuff from my basement. Yeah, that old dresser. I thought it would go back in the other room. It's too big. Whatever."

"April."

"Tremaine!"

"Cammie wanted kids?"

She sucks her teeth. "Ask your wife."

"Before she had Lane?"

"No, Tremaine, she didn't."

I suck my teeth. "So why she kept em?"

April laughs. "Thank God you didn't ask your wife. Start an argument if you want. He talking about why she kept his son."

"Not like that."

"How else is it Tremaine? What does it matter now? She wasn't getting an abortion."

I nod. "Oh, yeah, you right."

"Give me that."

"No coffee." I say moving it from him. "Go call Rose."

"I don't know." he lies.

I give him the phone. "Here."

He grabs the coffee cup then cuts his eyes at me. I watch him while he sips the coffee with caution. I don't know why I allowed him to do it after I said no. He takes two sips then he grabs the phone. He sits down on the stool instead of getting down.

"April?" he says.

"Say what?" April snaps looking at the phone. "Girl, Lane said my name like that. Sounding like a grown man. Good morning, handsome."

He slides the coffee towards him. "Hey, Nanma."

"But I was just April."

"No, sir." I say taking the cup from Lane.

He screams. I can deal with his screaming. I'm not dealing with explaining to Cammie that her son high off of coffee because I don't know how to say no to a 2 year old. He puts his head on the table but doesn't cry. Bad ass. I look over at Mommy and Devin. She puts her hand on his chest. It wasn't a simple hand on the chest. It was a hand on the chest then caress to his arm. She walks out of the kitchen. I look at Chris. He was looking down at his food. I guess he missed that. As I'm looking away he holds his head up with a smirk on his face. I nod my head. He starts laughing. Devin was just sitting there quiet.

"Something we should know about?" I ask.

"Hell no." Devin says grabbing a muffin. "That ain't me in this life. I hurt my baby too much. That girl..." he looks around. "She ain't no Cammie. Watch her."

Chris frowns. "That means?"

"She likes to flirt and thinks it funny for her fucking man to get jealous. It's a fucking game they play. I ain't in it."

"Okay." I retort.

"She like dark skin men. Sorry Chris." Devin chuckles. "You will see."

"No the fuck we won't." I say.

Caden starts screaming in the monitor. I look at it. He went from quiet to highly upset. Lane was the first to react. He jumps down from the stool running out of the kitchen. I don't know what the hell he think he is going to do. I stuff my mouth then look in the fridge for some bags of milk. I check the date then fix a bottle. I'm on Daddy Duty.

   Sevyn

Cammie smiles at me. "That's cute. Are you getting it?"

"No. Let me tell you what I'm thinking."

"It sounds negative." she says covering her ears.

I pin her arms to her side. "You better listen. I'm supposed to be going to Chicago next week. I'm thinking of talking Chris out of following me there then when his jealous ass try to pop up on me I have like this really cute setup for him. Like clothes, shoes, whatever, whatever. What do you think?"

"Girl, Chris ass gonna ruin it by thinking its for some other nigga."

"Fuck my jealous ass boyfriend."

Cammie giggles. "I don't know what kinda shit you on but I'm married."

I frown then laugh. "Cammie shut the fuck up."

"Am I in this conversation?" MiMi asks.

"No." I snap. "I told you we not fucking cool."

She rolls her eyes. "Make the setup Chris specific. Like have some shit up there that he knows is especially for him. Like some monogrammed shit or something. Something he can't mistake as shit for another man."

"Whatever." I say. "Cammie I got an idea."

"Bitch you better not." I say.

"Cammie. I can customize it for just Chris. Like buy something and get his name on it."

MiMi giggles then answers her phone. "Hey, My King. Use Cammie's milk. I had two full bottles already. You fed her both of them? And she wants more? Oh... Oh. I thought. Okay I got you. Oh no. Bitch, bye."

"I think that's a good idea, Amber. How did you come up with that?"

"Cause she a piece of shit. I want to do something for Devin. Like I want him to know I appreciate how he turned his life around. He making legal money and he so proud of himself."

Cammie giggles. Her bitch ass on the phone again with Trey. Like damn, what's the sudden change? I look at MiMi. She was looking at Cammie as well. I need her to look at me so that we can talk shit about Cammie with her eyes. I never too much heard MiMi talk real shit about Cammie. Even when they weren't talking she was more mad about the fact that they not talking. MiMi finally cuts her eyes at me. I start laughing at the face she gives me.

"You bitches come on." Cammie says walking away.

"So what's this sudden call Tremaine every 10 minutes? Bitch he home. Call him when we dancing our asses off. Call him while changing. Call him while walking to the car. What the hell you calling him so much for?"

Cammie rolls her eyes getting an attitude. "I got to have a reason for calling my husband?"

"Bitch, he home!" MiMi snaps.

Cammie giggles. "I'm trying to be a wife and a Mother. I called to check on Caden just now cause its feeding time and my breast aren't there. You think I'm calling him too much?"

"Yes." MiMi says.

"No." I say.

"Amber, call Chris and ask him if I'm call Trey too much."

I cut my eyes at her. "And look suspicious?"

"Chris knows how to be discreet." she says confident.

"Whatever." I say calling Chris.

He doesn't answer. I go to tell them but he calls back.

"Beautiful." he says.

"What are you doing?"

He chuckles. "Lane and Nia... Naya. Whatever this girl name playing bumper cars with these powerwheels. Yall stop!"

"Oh. So Trey not around?"

"No." He says. "I'm about to get your daddy, Lane! I'm bout to get him cause he just says no bitch when I tell him something. Bad ass motherfucker."

I chuckle. "Ask Trey is Cammie calling him too much. Like you know don't ask like that."

He starts whispering. "Yo."

"Yeah."

"Lane and that little girl playing bumper cars with those power cars."

"Nigga." Trey snaps not whispering. "Tell them to stop."

"He said no bitch."

Trey sucks his teeth. "He should have. You sound like a bitch. He two. Snatch his ass out the car and tell him to come to me."

Chris chuckles. "You sound like Cammie. She rubbed off on you. Aye, she don't normally call you that much. You ain't acting like it bother you."

"It don't. Why would it? Nigga stop stalling and go get that kid before they hurt themselves."

"Aight." He says walking away.

I look at Cammie. She was smiling. I roll my eyes. MiMi sucks her teeth.

"So gone." MiMi says.

"Lane." Chris says. "No come here. Little nigga."

I laugh at his voice. "Chris what is going on?"

He facetimes me. Lane was out of the car running around the yard. I laugh then cover my mouth showing Cammie. He would stop running then stand there waiting for Chris to walk close then take off again.

"Daylan!" Cammie says. Lane falls trying to look around.

I give Cammie the phone. "Gameover."

"You go put those cars up right now. I told you the next time you do that you are not playing with them. Tell Nia I am not playing with her ass."

"Nia!" Lane yells running away.

Chris chuckles. "He said you in trouble Naya. Mommy gonna pop us."

"What she say?" Cammie snaps.

"She pouting and sitting in the car."

"That's not what I told her to do. Chris that is a child's way of saying they don't care. Tell her to put that car up before I get those thighs."

He walks across the yard. "Cammie said put that car up before she gets those thighs."

"No." Nia says driving away.

"Where Lane?" Trey asks.

"I told Cammie." Chris says.

Trey chuckles. "Of course."

"Hey, Baby." Cammie says.

"Eww." I say snatching my phone then hanging up.

Cammie laughs walking away. "Bitch."

[multishipperlove]

More from this lovely sastiel AU (shhh, I know I’m the only one who cares about this) bc I wrote this months ago, when I also posted the first thing, but meh... I’ll never complete anything written in my LIFE so might as well post my ramblings here.  Complete backstories for this AU under the cut: 

Sam and Cas meet at a support meeting for single dads or single parents in general. Claire is four, Jack just turned three a few days ago.

Sam and Jack – Sam met Jack's mother, Kelly, while they were both still at the beginning of their college careers. Jess had just died, leaving Sam grieving and not quite as emotionally stable as he would have liked. Due to this, and some other problems (drug use? Sam and Kelly both getting their fixes from Ruby, Sam sobers up after the whole pregnancy thing, realizing he's slowly loosing control. It takes time and a shit ton of effort, regular AA meetings, but he's probably never been as proud of himself as he's after “getting over” his addiction. He's aware that Kelly might not have made it), their relationship never really became serious, always being an on-off sort of thing. The pregnancy was definitely not planned. They talked about it, a lot, considering what possibilities they had and what they wanted to do. In the end, they made the decision to get an abortion. They agreed to split the costs and that Sam would drive her, as well give her all the support he could, emotional and otherwise. But the morning he arrived to take her to the clinic, she was gone. The only thing left was a letter, telling him she'd changed her mind and not to come looking for her. Nevertheless, Sam was worried sick and wanted to find her, if for nothing else than to offer child support or something. He took the letter to the police, but was told they couldn't do anything since she'd gone away willingly. During the next couple of days, weeks and months he kept trying to contact her, but kept running into dead ends. Eventually, he decided to stop trying.

About two and a half years later, when he was almost done with law school, she suddenly returned. One Saturday evening he opened the door to see her with a crying toddler on her hip, looking completely exhausted and Sam quickly realizes that she's probably also still using, or using again. She all but drops the baby off with him, telling him it's all too much and if he keeps screaming, she might hurt him. Before he can even ask for the little guy's name, she's gone.

The next few days are a blur and an eternity at the same time. He finds an envelope in the box she dropped off, containing some important papers and Jack's birth certificate. Jack is also the name stitched into the baby blanket the toddler won't let go off, and seeing the shaky stitching, Sam's pretty sure that Kelly did that herself. The next morning he goes shopping, and after that he drags Jack to every person who thinks might be able to help him. There's so much he needs to worry about, custody, whether the boy's going to stay with him or not, what the legal situation is, if the child is well, if he can even afford a damn kid because he still has six months of law school left and god knows it's not getting easier after that. It's Tuesday when he realizes he hasn't even called his brother yet, or any of his friends, and after dialling his brother's number with shaking fingers he has his first breakdown. But Jack has just fallen asleep in the new crib in his bedroom, so he tries to keep it quiet. Luckily, Dean already knows about the whole story with Kelly and seeing how freaked his little brother is, he manages to stay calm. He tells their “uncle” Bobby, the man who took them in after John threw them out, and asks for a few days off to help Sam get settled. Or find an adoption agency, whatever he needs. Bobby feels like he wants to yell at Sam for not calling sooner and tells Dean to get going.

Later, after being called to come back in by a doctor, Sam's told that Jack shows some symptoms that could come from drug consume during the pregnancy. However, without Kelly there to tell them what she took, they can't be sure and will just have to see how Jack develops. Cue Sam's second breakdown. After that, Sam notices that Jack is a bit slow at times, needing more time to understand things than other kids, and doesn't do well in social situations. He's a clingy kid, and at first very shy. Later he gets over that a bit but still remains socially awkward and too naïve for his own good at times. “I was almost sober for nine months, it was hell!”  “'Almost'?!”

After about six months of living with the kid, Sam wouldn't give him up for anything. He's fully accepted his responsibility of being a parent and loves Jack with all his heart. Jack often asks for his mother, but with time it becomes less. Sam has a feeling that it's not the first time she's dropped him off somewhere without coming back for a while. He picks up his studies again, after having taken a leave for a few months, his professors/boss thankfully being understanding, and things seem to get back to normal. Bobby and Dean are already attached to Jack as well.

Then, in the middle of the day this time, Kelly is suddenly back. And she demands that Sam lets Jack go with her. Sam refuses, naturally, and tries to talk to her at first. About how much better Jack is doing in a stable home, how he'll need special care with some things that Sam will be able to provide once he's found a job, and how much he loves the kid. But Kelly starts to get hysterical, and eventually he's forced to throw her out. She threatens him, telling him she'll take it to court and that Jack is legally hers. As soon as he hears that Sam panics, suddenly realizing that he never did, in fact, look into the legal situation. Which is beyond stupid since he's a lawyer. So he rings up an old friend who went into family law and who knows about his situation, asking him for advice. At least until he can make an appointment with someone else, because right now he's desperate. When the first letter from Kelly's lawyer arrives, Sam's prepared.

The custody battle takes years, and Kelly refuses to give up. It's still going by the time Sam finds himself at the first support meeting, and he's still afraid that he'll have to give Jack up despite knowing that it would be ridiculous and that no judge would give Kelly sole custody after what she's done. He also tries not to take Jack to court appointments with him, knowing it's not fair on the little boy. He's offered Kelly early on that she can come and visit them though. So far, she hasn't.

One day his baby sitter calls in sick, or with an emergency of their own, and Sam isn't able to get a replacement in time for the court date. Not knowing how to help himself, but remembering that one of the other parents in the support group (a remarkable hot parent, but he tries not to think about that because what the fuck Sam, that guy lost his wife not too long ago) gave him their number to set up a playdate, he eventually calls Cas. Cas is more than happy to help out. Since Sam and him are both new in town, new in the support group, and their kids are almost the same age, he'd been hoping to hear from the man. If he can help out, all the better.

Sam doesn't know that, of course, and feels incredibly guilty for dropping Jack off at the other man's house. Once he gets back from the appointment, obviously exhausted and mentally drained, Cas even invites him to stay for dinner (since he just got done anyway, and oh, what a coincidence, he made too much). Sam keeps thanking him during the dinner and promises to make it up to Cas, maybe with a coffee or two when he's got the time. Neither of them is aware of the accidental flirting, like the exhausted idiots they are.

Cas and Claire – Castiel Jimmy Novak married what he thought to be the love of his live, Amelia Everett, when he was 18, because they were both from conservative families. And living together, out of wedlock, is a sin. They even bought a house, getting them several hundred thousand dollar of debt. And for a while, they were happy. Cas got a job as an accountant (he's good with numbers) and Amelia agreed to stay home and take care of the household. She was never really happy with that though, and things quickly started to go south when she wanted to take a job as well. Cas, as the head of the household, didn't want to feel like he couldn't take care of his family, and this was only one of the issues which kept coming up in their fights. But being the good Christians that they are, they wanted to make things work out and were willing to work on their marriage as well, even if it wasn't perfect. Their efforts were renewed once Amelia realized she was pregnant, and they were happy once more. Head over heels, actually. But Cas' blind faith as well as his blind obedience when it came to his own father or his boss still worried his wife, and she knew it wouldn't last.

And just like she had expected, about a year after Claire was born, everything took a turn for the worse again. Cas started to get more aggressive, yelling at her or even the kid when something didn't go his way, demanding obedience from her and dragging them around as if they were his property. She knew it wasn't right, and her friends kept telling her that it was abusive, and that her husband had some serious problems. Nonetheless, she stood by him. Until about another year later, when he started yelling at Claire, yelling at a two year old, at the table because she'd dared to reach for the food before they'd said praise. Trying to stay calm she'd gotten up, gathered her daughter and told Cas that she was leaving. He'd tried to stop her, of course, but he had never gotten physical. Which she was thankful for, otherwise she wasn't sure if she'd made it out that night. She knew her husband was going through a crisis, but that was no excuse for the way he'd been acting. She was able to stay at a friends house at first and told Cas that, if he ever wanted to see her and their daughter again, he'd need to change.

That was the first time Cas realized just how much he'd fucked up. He had known before, kind of, always feeling guilty after treating her like shit. He'd thought of his own mother, and how he'd sworn that he wouldn't become his father. Apparently, he'd failed in that regard. A few days later he called his family, to tell them what happened, only to learn that Amelia had now been shunned by her parents for being a disgrace of a wife and that both her parents and his parents were on his side. After a heated discussion with his father, that he didn't want their support and that he deserved what she'd done, that he was glad that she'd gotten Claire out of the house as well, he really decided to make a difference. First, he moved out of the house so Amelia and Claire could move back in. He got a small apartment and send every penny he could spare to his wife and child. And he started therapy, knowing full well (after already having gone through a bunch of psychology books as a teenager) that he wouldn't be able to break his own cycle of abusive behaviour without help. It took a lot of time, and several set backs, but eventually Amelia started to trust him again. At least she knew he was trying. Six months after Claire's third birthday, they agreed that he could move back in with them. The day before he did, Amelia was killed in a car accident.

Once again, Cas' entire world was shattered and this time he was the only one left to pick up the pieces. His family had turned away from him after he'd gone off at his father, and he'd never managed to find friends where he lived. Claire had always been a handful, and he had no idea how to raise a child on his own. For the first couple of months he stayed in the house with her, only going to work and to therapy, which helped him over the worst. Then he got a job offer in a different city, and the pay he was being offered was just too good to pass it up. So they packed their things, he promised Dr. Churley to find a new therapist, and off they went. Finding a therapist wasn't easy, but at least he found some support groups which he was sure would get him over the first couple of months. One that dealt with anger issues (though he mostly had that under control by now), one for depression, one for survivors of child abuse and... and one for single parents. And he thought why the hell not, he could need all the help he could get at the moment. At least one of these groups had to be good, and maybe even one good group would be enough.

When he got to know a certain Sam Winchester at his first group meeting, he was convinced that it had been the right decision. (Maybe later, Cas introduces him to the group for child abuse survivors as well because he realizes that Sam's got issues too)

Also, they'll both freak out a bit about being attracted to each other. Mutual Pining, naturally, with both of them thinking the other is straight.

Cas has issues because of his faith, Sam has issues because his bisexuality was one of the reasons he and his brother had to leave home. When John caught him kissing another guy in his room when they were supposed to be doing their homework, he'd freaked out. It had been one of the worst beatings Sam had ever gotten from his father, and that was saying something. Dean had found him at their secret hiding spot, still bleeding and trying hard not to cry his eyes out. For a moment, Sam had been afraid of his brother's reaction as well, but Dean had only hugged him and promised him he'd be save now. Then he'd loaded him into the Impala and driven them to Bobby, who'd already been waiting with open arms. Beyond a few overheard phone calls which mostly consisted of yelling, that was pretty much the last thing Sam had ever heard from his father.

[morbid-n-macabre]

Robert Blake. This case is not as cut and dry as i originally thought.

Robert "Bobby" Blake was a child actor who played one of the little rascals. He has talked a lot about his father, apparently young Bobby was the one supporting his whole family and though that was his father's doing, dad greatly resented him for it. There was physical abuse aplenty in that home. He moved out at the age of 16 and supported himself from then on. As an adult he did something very difficult- he successfully transitioned from child to adult star. Robert starred in several movies and won an Emmy for his role on the 70's hit tv show Beretta- during this role he also gained the reputation of a hot head. I'm not much of a fan but I gotta admit he's an amazing actor- the problem is you never know when he's acting and when he's not.

Robert was first married to Sondra Kerr in 1961. The couple had 2 children, a son and a daughter named Noah and Delinah Blake. Sondra has reported that Robert was very abusive towards her. They divorced in 1983.

It wasn't until the late 90's when Robert met a younger woman by the name of Bonnie (or Bonny) Lee Bakley. I never speak ill of the dead in my posts, but in this case it's important to tell what kind of person Bonnie really was- it's very relevant that the woman had quite a few enemies. Bonnie's "business" was scamming people. She would place personal ads or respond to ads she read, sweet talk the men she was writing to, and send them Pornography. Bonnie would write a single letter, copy it by hand, and send it to many different men. She'd pretend to be someone other than herself, she kept different mailboxes all over the country. She gave these men sob stories, told them how badly she needed money for this or that tragedy. She made promises to these men, told them she'd come to see them if they'd help her through her problem, financially. Maybe she'd say her car was broke down; or that her kid was sick- she always needed money. Then she'd turn around and blackmail these men with anything she could use against them. If she believed a man was wealthy enough, she actually did meet him- hell some she married. One woman who came forward says Bonnie married her grandfather and took him for 80K. Then she stole the grand daughter's identity and began scamming men using her name- on top of that she absolutely destroyed this woman's credit. Bonnie did this to several women, she kept several different drivers licenses on her. Some men made her beneficiary of their life insurance, others cut their families out of their will and added Bonnie. This is how she supported herself, in the pre internet era she made 300K a year doing this! Bonnie had been in serious legal trouble for her scams, arrested multiple times for drugs, writing checks, and fraud. But her real ambitions went much further than scamming lonely men through the mail. She wanted to be rich and she thought the way to do this was to trap a celebrity. She was known to stalk older celebs, targeted big names such as Frankie Valli, Dean Martin, Gary Busey, among others. She badly wanted to be a part of Hollywood; her close friends say that her goal was to get knocked up by a celeb, and she did just that. More than once, she claimed. The first time was the infamous Jerry Lee. She said he fathered her 3rd child- Jerry's sister says she believes her brother paid Bonnie a settlement. It was determined through a DNA test that this girl did not even belong to Jerry. Later, when she was sleeping with Robert, she was also with Marlon Brando's son, Christian.

Bonnie met Christian Brando while he was in prison for manslaughter- he shot and killed his sister's boyfriend. Bonnie began writing him, chatting him up, sending him porn. When Christian was released, the two dated. Christian thought he and Bonnie were in an exclusive relationship. He was wrong- Bonnie was also sleeping with Robert Blake.

Bonnie told Robert she was on birth control, she could not get pregnant. This was a blatant lie- a friend would later admit she was actually undergoing fertility treatment. When Bonnie became pregnant she told both men that the baby was theirs. Robert did not want another child at all, especially with a woman who had purposely tried to trap him- he knew what she'd done to Jerry Lee. He was pissed, he wanted her to abort the baby. Bonnie originally agreed, but then refused. All along she allowed Christian to believed the child was his, and when the little girl was born Bonnie named her Christian Shannon Brando. Christian bonded with the baby he believed was his. A DNA test was not given until later when Robert saw a picture of the child and he realized she looked just like him. DNA proved that Robert was the father, and baby Christian Shannon Brando was renamed Rose Lenore Sophia Blake- Rosie for short. Christian Brando was understandably pissed, he Is quoted for telling Bonnie, "You're lucky somebody ain't out there to put a bullet in your head".

Once Robert knew Rosie was his, he would've done any and every thing in his power to keep her near. Though it doesn't appear he even liked the woman, Robert married Bonnie- obviously a marriage of convenience. There was an air tight prenup in which Bonnie agreed to give up her "business" of scamming men.

Just a few months after they wed, Bonnie was dead.

May 4th of 2001. On this night, Robert took Bonnie to dinner at his favorite fancy Italian restaurant, Vitello's. After they had eaten, the couple walked out to the car. Robert claims he left Bonnie sitting in the passenger seat of his car after he realized he'd forgotten his gun inside the restaurant. When he returned to the car, Bonnie was bleeding profusely. Though Robert said he thought she'd been beaten up, she'd been shot. She was gurgling when Robert found her; by the time the ambulance reached her she was dead. Bonnie was 44 years old.

By all accounts Robert ran around like a chicken with his head cut off- he went to a nearby residence to ask for help, he then ran back to the restaurant for help. He was screaming, crying, even vomiting- just hysterical. Some say this was his best acting yet.

During a search of Robert's home, Police found 12K cash inside one of his dressers. There was also a box of bullets just like the ones that killed Bonnie- in the 100 count box exactly 3 were missing. That's exactly the amount of bullets that was used in the murder.

Robert did have motive, all the motive in the world. The star had found that Bonnie was still scamming people, which he absolutely despised. Friends say he was very afraid that Rosie was destined to have a horrible life if Bonnie raised her, that she'd become a scam artist like her mother- he expressed concern that Rosie would become a prostitute. But there really wasn't any concrete evidence against the star. It was all circumstantial- like why did he take the woman he hated out to dinner? Why not park closer to the restaurant? His leaving a gun in the restaurant while his wife was shot made him look so guilty. He told police that he was packing heat because there had been threats against Bonnie's life, that there had been attempts to kill her. There was some gunshot residue on him when police tested him that night, and a friend of Bonnie's said that right before her death Bonnie confided she was afraid Robert was going to kill her. Still, he may never have been charged with the murder at all had a couple of stuntmen named Robert Hambleton and Gary McLarty not told police that Robert had tried to hire them to kill Bonnie- and there was proof that Robert had called them. The year after Bonnie's death, Robert was arrested for her premeditated murder.

Of course Robert was wealthy, he could afford the best defense money could buy. We all know that goes a long way in a murder trial. The defense team managed to discredit the stuntmen. About that gunshot residue- I'm not a forensics kind of girl, I enjoy the psychology of murder. But this is how i heard this explained: There was very little gunshot residue on Robert that night- just 5 gunshot particles. But the gun that was used to kill Bonnie, a German WW2 handgun found in a dumpster near the scene, was old and left a lot more residue than usual. The weapon was tested and found to leave 2,440 residue particles when fired twice. So while there was a bit of residue, it wasn't a red herring. The defense claimed that the residue found on Robert that night could've been from handling a different gun, he was a gun enthusiast who had a license to carry. Prosecution claimed he must've gotten rid of it somehow, wiped it off or something.

It's more than likely that some of the jurors thought he probably did it, there just wasn't enough evidence to find him guilty of capital murder- especially in a death penalty case. In March of 2005, Robert was found not guilty of Bonnie's murder.

Just months after the murder trial was over, not unlike OJ, Robert was promptly taken to civil court where it is much easier to be found guilty. In November of '05, Robert was found liable for his wife's wrongful death, he was ordered to pay Bonnie's children 30 Mil- an appeal knocked that figure down to 15 million. After all the lawyer fees and paying Bonnie's family, he was bankrupt. Robert was poor for the first time in his life, depressed, cooped up in his small dwelling where he became a hermit- he spoke to no one. Rosie, who is 18 today, was reportedly raised by Delinah Blake, Robert's adult daughter. They have had zero contact with their father. The latest news on Robert Blake was last year when he filed for a marriage license to marry a long time friend, 55 y/o Pamela Hudak. There's no news on whether the two actually did wed.

Whatever Bonnie did in life does not make her deserving of this ending. Very few people deserve that. I do apologize for trashing her, but it's important to realize how many enemies she had. While Robert had plenty of motive, he wasn't the only one- she had quite a few victims herself. My opinion on this case has changed considerably since i began researching this. If you asked me last week what i thought of Robert Blake, I'd have said guilty. I'm not so sure now. If he did do it, which is very possible, I believe he paid someone. I don't believe he physically pulled the trigger. I do not blame the jury- I doubt I'd have convicted him with the death penalty on the table, either. If they'd have tried him without the death penalty option, he may have been convicted. Maybe he'll make a death bed confession some day. Though that's unlikely- he's too narcissistic. If Christian Brando had a part in this, It's unlikely we will ever know. He's already deceased- as are both stuntmen.

What do you think?

[cksmart-world]

The Completely Unnecessary News Analysis

By Christopher Smart

December 26, 2019

BLESS THE INLAND PORT PROTESTERS

We live in a country where you won't get arrested for protesting. Well, not exactly. Protests are as American as tea bags and when elected officials screw up or sell out, it's our right, our duty even, to protest. And that brings us to the proposed Inland Port in Salt Lake City — where trucks and trains from all over would bring freight to a sea of warehouses and then shipped elsewhere by more trucks and trains. Last summer, a group of folks who didn't cotton to the idea of a lot more traffic and a lot more air pollution, among other things, including a heavy-handed state government, decided to make their displeasure known. A protest at City Hall ended up at the Salt Lake Chamber across the street, where the Inland Port Authority was to meet. Cops came and all hell broke loose. In the end, 10 protesters were charged with felonies and four with misdemeanors. Last week, Salt Lake City police, after a review, said their officers did nothing wrong — of course not. And that's the price of protesting, particularly on private property. The D.A. is going to make an example of the “Inland Port 10,” who are now staring down the barrel of the criminal justice system. And they're going to need a lot more than your prayers. As for you would-be protesters out there — watch your six, freedom isn't free.

TILTING AT REALITY

OK, this is serious. Our commander in chief has blown the whistle on the proliferation of windmills. They are a clear and present danger. (We couldn't possibly make this up.) Windmills are unreliable, cause cancer and kill birds. "I never understood wind," Trump said. "You know, I know windmills very much. I've studied it better than anybody I know. It's very expensive. They're made in China and Germany mostly..." he said in a recent speech. Fortunately, the president has made time in his busy schedule to highlight these urgent matters, like those water-saving toilets that “you have to flush 10 or 15 times.” And dishwashers — what happened to dishwashers? “Women tell me,” Trump said, that their water-saving dishwashers are terrible. But those issues pale in comparison to windmills. "I told the story about the woman,” Trump told his rapt audience, “she wants to watch television and she says to her husband, 'Is the wind blowing? I'd love to watch a show tonight, darling. The wind hasn't blown for three days. I can't watch television, darling. Darling, please, tell the wind to blow.'" It's all true, of course, but what about those damn blenders?

DREAMING OF A GREEN SKI SEASON

Soon, you won't have to drive up the canyons to go skiing. Gondolas could whisk you from Starbucks to Alta, Snowbird, Brighton, Solitude, Park City or Deer Valley, according to a story in The Salt Lake Tribune. No more traffic jams, no more parking headaches. The proposal is the long awaited solution to the inconvenience of crawling up the canyon in your car needing to go potty. All those nice folks who make money from skiing want to get more people up the canyons in order to make more money and the automobile is getting in the way. Just think, we could get 10 times the amount of skiers and boarders on the slopes. CA-CHING. Think of the profits. Think of the stats SKI UTAH can boast: 27 bazillion skier-days in a single season. Of course, there will be those grouchy old people who say putting more and more people on the mountain diminishes the sport and all the good stuff that goes with it. But those poor backward folks are only thinking of the experience. That's so selfish. They should be considering profit margins, return on investment and all those greenbacks. Just ask the Utah Travel Council, which is supported by your tax dollars, after all. You won't get any thank yous, of course, but you can take heart knowing that you helped make skiing so much more crowded and profitable. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what they call success.

EVANGELICALS IN A HOLY TWIT

Last week, Mark Galli, the outgoing editor of  the magazine “Christianity Today,” editorialized that Donald Trump should be removed from office because he is “a near perfect example of a human being who is morally lost and confused” and has “no loyalty to the Creator of the Ten Commandments.” Jesus, Mary and Joseph. It sent shock waves through the evangelical community. Nonetheless, many of them continue to see Trump as Heaven sent. At the same time, others, including Catholics, Protestants, Jews, Muslims, heathens and pagans have wondered why, after all Trump's lying, bamboozling and extracurricular fornicating could they possibly hold that view, while also praising Jesus of Nazareth as the Savior. A new NPR-PBS poll found 75 percent of white evangelical Christians approved of Trump, compared with 42 percent of adults overall. Some see Trump evangelicals as hypocrites. But those Trumpers seem unfazed on account of The Donald bestowed upon them two anti-abortion Supreme Court justices and promised them religious freedom (the ability to legally discriminate against gay and trans people). What else really matters. Thank you, Lord.

Post Script

Well, that just about does it for another Christmas Holiday here at Smart Bomb, where the staff continues to puzzle over the Three Kings of the Orient who brought gifts to the Baby Jesus in the manger — and why He took up carpentry before starting Christianity. But maybe it's best not to over-think these things. Speaking of spirituality, Baba Ram Das (real name Richard Alpert) has died at age 88. He and Timothy Leary helped popularize LSD in the 1960s as an avenue to greater consciousness. Ram Das was a guiding light for Wilson and the band, too. Among other things, he wrote a best seller in 1971 called “Be Here Now.” Ram Das then traveled to India to find true enlightenment without drugs and returned to this country some years later as a New Age guru. No Santa for him, but he died contented — it's that inner peace thing. Despite Trump's massive tax cuts it looks like most Santas didn't have a lot of extra cash this season. Billionaire Santas and corporate Santas do have a lot more, but don't believe in the spirit of giving so much. (The top 91 corporations in this country paid no federal tax at all.) Once again Trickle Down Economics is proven to be nothing more than a fable that won't go away, kinda like the Three Kings.

All right Wilson, since the band is practically three sheets to the wind anyway, why not unfurl the spinnaker and sail us out into the New Year: We were born before the wind / Also younger than the sun / Ere the bonnie boat was won / As we sailed into the mystic / Hark, now hear the sailors cry / Smell the sea and feel the sky / Let your soul and spirit fly into the mystic...

[go-redgirl]

McConnell, Kaine To Introduce Bipartisan Senate Bill To Raise The Federal Smoking Age to 21: OPINION:  They Can’t Seem To Pass Any ‘Real’ Worth-while Legislation In A ‘Bipartisan’ Way So, They Pass  A Little ‘Weak Legislation’ Just For The Record To Fool The American Citizens That They Are Working In A Bipartisan Way. They Really Believe We Are That Gullible.

-------------------------------------------------

INDIVIDUALS/COMMENTS/POSTS:

What differences will it make when it is not illegal for young teenagers to smoke? I am not aware of any punishment if a child smoke a cigarette. It is not even prohibited . 1 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:40:29 PM by SMGFan [ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan Why is there a Federal smoking age?

2 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:41:02 PM by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.) [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan Why don’t they pass a Bill to build a complete wall?

3 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:43:20 PM by Paladin2 [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan How will a bill that limits buying TOBACCO curb VAPING??

They are two totally separate things

4 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:43:24 PM by canuck_conservative [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: BenLurkin See what they have done in the U.K.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-7023631/Smoking-children-plummeted-35-cigarettes-banned-till-points.html

5 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:43:29 PM by SMGFan ("God love ya! What am I talking about") [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan

Where would we be without a benevolent government to save us from ourselves?

6 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:43:40 PM by mrmeyer (You can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him. Robert Heinlein) [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan

My smoking campaign is.. if they can choose a gender other than thier scientific one.. why can’t they choose to smoke?

7 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:43:58 PM by momincombatboots (Do you know anyone who isnÂ’t a socialist after 65? Freedom exchanged for cash and control.)

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To: SMGFan If you aren’t responsible enough to drink or smoke... WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ALLOWED TO VOTE?

8 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:44:09 PM by HamiltonJay

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To: SMGFan

And the voting age to 16.....SMH.....

9 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:44:27 PM by Ndorfin (Kitties,titties, and fiddies)

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To: SMGFan

UK banned displays. No one prohibit under age smoke, only underage purchasing.

Of course a girl may get an abortion at 12 .

10 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:45:56 PM by SMGFan ("God love ya! What am I talking about")

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To: All This is a totalitarian move. I’m against smoking, but only a totalitarian government should do. Make smoking illegal or leave it alone.

11 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:46:14 PM by Retvet (Retvet) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: SMGFan

Of course a girl may get an abortion at 12. ...without parental consent.

And of course any kid 18 and older can legally buy and smoke marijuana in certain Dem states.

12 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:48:33 PM by Obadiah [ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: SMGFan

So an American military member can vote, fight, and die for their country, but they can’t have a drink or smoke a cigarette? I remember when 18 was the legal drinking age, and you had to be 21 to vote. My mother used to send us kids to the corner grocery store to buy her cigarettes for her and my father. Back then, a pack of Camel’s was 25 cents.

13 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:48:39 PM by mass55th ("Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway." ~~ John Wayne) The same Mitch McConnell who wouldn’t bring Kate’s Law up for a vote?

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To: SMGFan

Nannystate RINO bullcrap.

15 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:49:21 PM by Vaquero ( Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: BenLurkin

Children 2 to 7 smoke in Indonesia in this 2011 story

https://abcnews.go.com/Health/age-children-smoking-indonesia/story?id=14464140 From Age 2 to 7: Why Are Children Smoking in Indonesia?

16 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:49:36 PM by SMGFan ("God love ya! What am I talking about") -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: BenLurkin

Why is there a Federal smoking age? Also, my first thought.

Why do we even have states anymore? The Nanny government in Washington has all covered.

17 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:49:54 PM by Pontiac (The welfare state must fail because it is contrary to human nature and diminishes the human spirit) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: Paladin2 Yeah, Isn’t it great to see McConnell really doing something important?

18 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:49:57 PM by A strike (Import third world become third world) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: BenLurkin Get out of here government!

19 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:51:03 PM by Bonemaker (invictus maneo) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To: SMGFan

What about the epidemic of illegal people and drugs into our country over an unsecure border?

20 posted on 5/20/2019, 3:51:28 PM by 1Old Pro

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #85

“so you can throw me to the wolves; tomorrow i will come back, leader of the whole pack.”

when was the last time you saw the person you like?   february what are you listening to?   markiplier playing "scp containment breach."  going on a nostalgia binge. would you take back your last boyfriend/girlfriend?   nope.  tyler wasn't for me. are there certain things that can’t be joked about with you?   rape and abortion. have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend?   no. would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn?   i'd be fucking pissed.  not out of jealousy, but because it's lustful and just generally disgusting. your last ex calls wanting to hangout, what do you say?   probably "stop fucking harassing me." do you have a friend named ashley?   no, but that's my older sister's name. are you an aunt or an uncle?   yep. did you use to watch blues clues?   of course. are you a twilight fan?   i never was. when’s the last time you threw up?   couple weeks ago.  one of my pills makes me sick sometimes. do you stutter when you get nervous?   terribly. what is your favorite superhero movie?   "ghost rider," if you count him. do you think that aliens exist?   no. do you own a pair of converses?   i've got a few. do you regret your last relationship?   i sure do. do you plan on having children in the future?   currently, no.  i really don't think i'm capable of raising another human being efficiently. when did you last go to the doctor and what for?   i went to my therapy appointment a few days ago. are you socially awkward?   agonizingly would you rather watch a comedy movie or horror movie?   horror if you could choose to be any mythical character, which would you choose?   dragon what is your favorite animal and why?   meerkats.  they're adorable, unspeakably brave and loyal, and so curious. do you find yourself on youtube a lot?   it's always open. what is something that reminds you of your childhood?   dinosaurs what show do you miss coming on television?   "meerkat manor" :( have you ever tried opening your eyes under water?   yeah.  don't like doing it though. have you ever been admitted to the hospital?   five times. do you have a hint of obsessive compulsive disorder?   a bit.  i used to have baaad repetitive thought cycles when i was younger. do you use any acne medication?   nah.  i don't really get acne anymore. if you’re offered a trip to either hawaii or alaska which would you choose?   alaska what cause (feminism, gay rights, abortion, etc) are you most passionate about?   the pro-life movement how much money have you saved by shop lifting?   what the fuck?!  i don't shoplift to begin with.  wtf. do you hate when couples are like “i love you” after dating for about 2 days?   it's ignorant as fuck to say, yes.  those are dangerous fucking words. have you ever run away?   yes. ever been attacked by a dog?   no.  my little sister has, though.  i'm pretty sure she still has the scar. ever had an out-of-body experience?   no. ever considered acupuncture?   noooo. do you prefer gory horror films or the psychological ones?   PSYCHOLOGICAL do you have a favorite youtuber? or do you not watch much youtube?   rhett&link + markplier are my literal babes. who do you text the most? or do you like to text at all?   sara. do you like ronnie james dio?   \m/, motherfucker. ever given a tattoo before? would you like to?   no.  i have tremors, so that'd be a terrible idea. have you ever had a pet bird?   no. do you have any siblings that you never seen before?   one half-sister, yes. have you ever heard a song that made you cry?   most notably johnny cash's version of "hurt."  the first time i listened to it, i couldn't help but cry.  like i know it's a cover, but his version just personifies pain. do you like the show “that 70s show”?   it's probably like my second-favorite show.  it's fucking hysterical. has your house ever been broken in to?   thank god no.  the bloods tried to break into our old house though while my older sister and her old best friend were home alone.  they were terrified. do you listen to blink-182?   some of their songs are great, sure.  i like a couple. do you listen to nirvana?   sometimes. what thumb do you use to hit the space bar with?   my right. do you like regular or chocolate milk better?   chocolate growing up, did you listen to country music?   not usually by will, but i did regardless.  my older sister usually controlled the radio and such.  if i wanted to listen to music on my own time, it was usually mainstream pop. do you have a gazebo at your house?   no do you like tomatoes?   nooo. what type of waffles do you like? (plain, blueberry etc..)   plain do you like chicken or beef better? or do you not eat meat?   i prefer chicken. did america really put a man on the moon?   yes. have you ever dated outside of your race?   for less than a day. were you born in a hospital, or somewhere else?   in a hospital. who is your favorite male singer?   patrick stump from fall out boy. do you listen to any acoustic bands, or singers?   not specifically. what is your birthstone?   amethyst do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?   just go to the drive-thru.  i mean, isn't that the point of a fast food restaurant, to get food quickly and easily? do you like chinese food over pizza?   nope. if someone you know offered you pot, what would you say?   well first, i'd say no, and two, i'd most likely dissociate from that person.  i in no way get involved with drugs. have you ever been to a strip club?   hell no. how was/is the food in the cafeteria at your school?   some were actually pretty decent, others were hellish. what is your favorite song?   "do i wanna know?" by the arctic monkeys what do you think of the name courtney?   i like it. do you have a wild side?   not really, honestly. ever gone boating all day?   i've been on a boat while fishing most of the day, but not like, all day. what is your favorite thing about going to your grandma’s house?   honestly?  nothing.  i don't even get along with my grandma. do you like eggs?   only if they're scrambled and cheesy. who are your heroes?   mark fischbach and my mom. do you know who rodney atkins is?   i live in the south, buddy.  take a guess. are you tall?   no. when is the last time you wore a dress?   my sister's wedding. what is the last alcoholic beverage you’ve had?   a strawberry smirnoff. do you know someone that smiles ALL the time?   no.  that'd be freaky. who is the hottest person alive?   link neal, boys and girls. are you ready for summer?   hell no.  i hate everything about summer. do you like the sun or do you like snow better?   snow!! don’t you love pancakes?   hell ye boi. quick name a country singer:   tim mcgraw.  the only one i sincerely like. who did you last have an alcoholic drink with?   family. ever had fruit pizza?   ew, no.  fruit doesn't belong on pizza. do you know anyone named caleb?   i'm acquainted with one.  he's cool. how many friends do you have on facebook?   around 110, i think a little more? what was on the last sandwich you ate?   peanut butter. what sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school?   the same stuff i listen to now: heavy metal.  i went through a phase where i listened to even heavier, more emo-styled bands, though. what is your favorite thai dish?   never tried any. how many contacts do you have in your phone?   i think like 15, lol. when was the last time you made out with somebody?   around a year and a half. what month of the year was your mother born?   august. how many apps do you have on your phone?   only four.  my phone doesn't have a lot of memory. have you ever dated a smoker? if not, would you?   i haven't, and no, i honestly wouldn't. would you rather travel to japan or scotland?   hmmmm... i THINK japan, but i'm honestly unsure. what is your mother’s first name?   donna. do you share a middle name with any of your siblings?   yes. have there ever been any bushfires/wildfires in your area?   it's possible i guess, but i don't think so. how would you label your sexual orientation?   heterosexual do you consider your goals easily achievable or are they pretty grand?   eh, kinda in-between... my only real goal is to be a photographer, but the photography industry is SUPER competitive. what’s your favorite vegetable?   broccoli is yummy.  especially with cheese. would you rather eat italian or indian food?   italian have you ever missed a flight?   no. can you name five adjectives describing you?   passionate, shy, sleepy, nervous, and loyal. do you prefer long or short hair on the opposite sex?   a bit long. what is your favorite soda?   mountain dew what is your opinion on legalizing drugs?   you are honestly naive if you believe that's a good idea.  no offense. do you like country music?   no. have you ever done something illegal more than once?   yes. if you could marry any celebrity, who would it be?   mark fischbach omg can you swim?   yes. what are your fears?   pregnancy/childbirth, closed spaces, being alone in the end, long-legged spiders, the ocean, whale sharks, maggots/larvae, other things... do you shave your arms even though it supposedly grows back thick?   no. do you ever get too lazy to clean up your pet’s pee and leave it for your parents to do it?   i clean my dog's pee because he's my responsibility.  if cali pees, i tell mom.  bentley, i tell nicole. what insects or bugs do you fear most?   rhino beetles and wasps do you think weed is just as bad as cigarettes?   it's fact that it's worse.  it has more carcinogens. don’t you just love free samples?   obviously. are you someone’s best friend?   no. have you ever used alternative medicine or old-fashioned remedies?   i don't think so. what color and style is your hair?   it's red, but with overgrown roots. do you wear glasses?   yeah. do you want kids?   no.  there's just no way i'd be able to properly take care of a kid. what if you were in a fire and you could only save one object, what would it be?   i'm guessing family and pets are already safe?  then in that case, my laptop. what if you could ask god any one question, what would it be?   "why do people who aren't sure whether or not they believe in you go to hell?" what if you found a suitcase full of $1,000,000, what would you do?   honestly, i'd look for identification.  i just couldn't take that much money with a good conscience. what if you had to choose, would you give up your sight or your hearing?   sight.  i couldn't live in total silence. what if you saw a robbery, would you report it?   obviously??? what if you were given a chance to go to the moon, would you go? why or why not?  no.  i don't want to be in space that long. what if your friend could not have a child, would you carry her child for her?   honestly, no. my 1st job was:   game stop sales clerk favorite dog breed:   hmmm.  i really really like akita inus.  papillons, too. assuming you had the cash to make it happen, what would your ideal living situation be at this point in your life (i.e. with who, where, under what circumstances, etc.)?  how does your ideal compare to your current situation?   i don't have anyone i'd like to live with besides who i do now, but i know i'd really like a wood house in the woods by a waterfall.  it'd be different from where i live now, definitely.  we live right beside a road that leads to a small town. if someone were to travel to your city (assuming they have never been there before), what would you tell them to visit? is your city (or the closest larger city to you) a big tourist area at all?  lmao there's nothing to really visit.  and no. if, as a parent of a teenager, you knew that your teenage daughter was having sex/thinking about having sex, would you put her on birth control pills? do you agree or disagree with those who say that placing teenagers on the pill encourages promiscuous sex? if you’re on the pill, how old were you when you went on it? if you’re not, have you ever considered taking it?   i'd be pretty heavily trying to influence her to not have sex as a teen, but if that's what she really wanted, yes, i'd put her on the pill.  i don't believe it encourages promiscuous sex, no.  i was put on the pill when i was like... maybe 16, but only due to severe period cramps. what is the worst example of poverty you have seen in person? does this make you feel guilty at all (say, for throwing out food that you didn’t finish)?   the saddest thing i saw, actually recently, was a pregnant woman with her husband in the pouring rain with just a small umbrella and a sign.  can't remember what it said, honestly, but it was depressing.  and of course i feel guilty. do you look at sex as a special thing that is shared with someone you love, or do you treat sex more casually? if you are a virgin, are you waiting for the right person to come along, or do you have religious/moral reasons to wait?   it is 100% something special you share with hopefully one person.  and i'm waiting for both reasons. do you unfriend people on facebook who post endless status updates or seem to be begging for attention? what about family members or coworkers – are you comfortable accepting their friend requests?  is there anything on your facebook that could potentially cause trouble for you if someone were to see it?   if you're fishing for attention, hell yes i do.  i don't put up with that.  and i take invites from family, yes.  but i guess my use of profanity could cause some nasty looks from some of my family, particularly my grandma. when you have a significant other, are you honest about everything with that person, or do you think that there are some things better left unsaid? do you want your significant other to be willing to tell you anything and everything as well?   i'm entirely open.  and yes. grossest memory:   that one time my late lizard pooped aaall over my hands and shirt.  i nearly puked. what do you think of "abstinence"?   it's the safest option for everyone. don’t you just hate preachers?   uhhh, nooo...? does a mango smoothie sound good to you now?  omgggg yaaaas what’s something that you find trashy?  very short shorts.  cover your ass, please. crayons or markers?   crayons would you rather receive roses or sunflowers?   roses. do you like to stay in your pajamas all day long?   honestly, i'm always in my pajamas unless i have to go somewhere. mints or chewing gum?   gum. at one point of your life, have you been obsessed with dinosaurs or robots?   dinosaurs, yes.  i was obsessed as a kid.  i still think they're cool. have you ever been in a car accident?   yes. are you afraid of stink bugs?   yeah, they look freaky. are you interested in anime?  somewhat, sure. name your favorite cartoon.   pokemon are you afraid of the dentist?   nah. do you believe in abortion?  no. have you ever tried jolly rancher candy canes?   YUUUUM, yes ;v; do you go hunting?   no. what is your biggest accomplishment in life so far?   recovering. do documentaries bore you?   if they're about animals, no. are you usually happy or sad most of the time?  happy, as of the late. (: are you afraid of spiders?   most, yes. what is your most prized possession?  the plaque i have for graduating in the very top percentage of my class. do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?  closed. have you ever peed in the woods?   no. ever used a gun?   no. who would you like to see in concert?  METALLICA, PLSSSSSS what’s your second favorite color?   pink do you know any african spiritual songs?   no. what kind of stuff do you like on your hot dogs?   mustard and ketchup. what’s one thing that’s happened to you that has made you a stronger person?   jason breaking up with me. what’s one thing that’s happened to you in your life that made you feel weak?   again, jason leaving. who do you think has had the largest influence on the person you are today?   myself? what is one thing you feel your life is missing?   adventure, definitely.  action. which blink-182 song do you think is the most depressing?   that i know?  "i miss you." what color lights are on your christmas tree?   we use colorful ones every year. are there hurricanes where you live?   yep. have you ever been to a rehab center?   i guess that depends on what you mean by "rehab center."  never a place exclusively to get off drugs, no.  but the mental hospitals i've been to doubled as detox centers.  which was remarkably stupid.  you don't treat mental illness patients the same as patients going through detox??? what’s your favorite flavor of ramen?   i don't like ramen. have you ever been given an ink blot test? if so, what did you see in it?   in a therapy thing, yes actually.  and i mean, lots of things?  i was shown various things. are you friends with someone who is a stoner?   no.  wait, yes actually.  but we don't really talk much anymore. do you like playing shooting games at the arcade?   nah. how long have you lived in the house you live in?   only like two months. where did you lose your virginity, if you have?   n/a what color car(s) do your parents drive?   i think dad's is black, mom's is white. what are your views on getting rid of the penny?   i don't really care. which asian country would you most like to visit?   japan have you ever had a nosebleed?   hasn't everyone at one point or another? do you have bangs?   no. have you ever kissed someone underneath mistletoe?   i don't think so. do you have a weak stomach?   no. which website do you spend the most time on?   youtube.  it's always open/i'm always listening to something, usually let's plays. have you ever kissed someone of a different race?   he kissed me, i didn't kiss him. do you read fanfiction? if so, what fandoms?   no, actually. would you go back to your ex if he/she asked you?   tyler, definitely not.  jason, not right away.  he'd definitely have to prove himself to me again. do you like stars, or hearts better?   hearts mickey mouse, or winnie the pooh?   pooh! where is the best place to get ice cream?   coldstone, brother.