#he was unable to move on after death bc he had no one to pass his skills onto
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sage-nebula · 2 years ago
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me: "it's okay if people are wrong about things, people are allowed to be wrong about things, it's not a big deal."
someone: [refers to any Link other than the one in Ocarina of Time/Majora's Mask as the Hero of Time and/or refers to any Zelda other than the one in Skyward Sword as Hylia's reincarnation]
me: "I am going to gnaw through their arm like a beaver would a tree"
#it's SO ANNOYING it is literally my BIGGEST pet peeve#there is only ONE Hero of Time & that is the one from Ocarina/Majora!#the others are Heroes of DIFFERENT THINGS#and the ONLY Zelda that is a goddess reborn as a mortal is the one in Skyward Sword!#the others are HER DESCENDANTS#Demise cursed ZELDA'S BLOODLINE - ''the blood of the goddess'' means THE CHILDREN & GRANDCHILDREN ETC ETC THAT CAME FROM HER#and fucksake in Wind Waker - the first mainline game to come after Majora's Mask - that Link is SPECIFICALLY dubbed the Hero of WINDS#if you play a NG+ to get the ancient Hylian translated they even specifically say he's NOT the Hero of Time and HAS NO RELATION to him#these games are not hard to understand! why does no one read the effing text!!!#AGH!!!!!!!!#(also the Spirit of the Hero is the unbreakable will - it's not the same person reincarnated again and again)#(the only one that is the ACTUAL same person is Ganon)#(and even then - by the time BotW takes place he's become so corrupted over the cycles that he's not really a *person* anymore)#(but just an entity of pure malice)#i just. it frustrates me so much. this is such a petty thing to get annoyed abt but it ANNOYS ME SO MUCH#anyway#oh also Twilight Princess is the PROOF that the Hero is not reincarnated over & over again#bc the Hero's Shade? THAT'S THE HERO OF TIME#he was unable to move on after death bc he had no one to pass his skills onto#so he persisted until he could teach them to the Hero of Twilight#who very obviously can't be him reincarnated bc HIS SPIRIT IS STILL THERE#AS THE HERO'S SHADE#AGHHHHHHH drives me crazy#i realize this is me being a petty bitch but that's why it's called a PET PEEVE#i KNOW it's stupid but I'm still annoyed#a n y w a y
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feefivefoe · 3 months ago
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Something I think about when it comes to the batfam is what if they remember reader after a long long time? I’m talking 10+ years after leaving the family. Like what would that be like? Reader wouldn’t be a young adult but someone who’s established themselves in a career and most likely moved out of Gotham, got themselves a somewhat better apartment or maybe a small house, maybe gone through therapy and has decided that they are indifferent about the families existence, to the point that reader forgets about them sometimes. Except Jason reader would probably light a candle every birthday and holiday for him
I feel like the angst potential would be like an aged wine. Bruce Wayne forgot about his first born child their entire life, plus 10 years. Maybe the only reason they remember is a Gotham exclusive on the family, a “where are they now?” type story and half the family (Steph, Cas, Damian, Duke) discover reader existed and the other half is reminded of the forgot part of their family. Oh the angst for Jason! His favorite sibling, his friend from before his death, how could he forget them?? How could Bruce forget them??? And oh god it’s been such a long time where are they?? The story said that they couldn’t find a record in Gotham anymore, are they dead? He let them be forgotten, something he couldn’t stand happening to him, and now here he is, perpetuating it. The fight this would cause!! I feel like the fam would turn on Bruce demanding answers that he doesn’t have. Jason goes to readers room and finds nothing. Maybe reader wanted to cover their tracks? Maybe they didn’t want any trace of them in a manor that never cared for them in the first place? Who knows, all the fam knows is that this building feels so much colder now with this revelation.
Meanwhile reader is getting dinner with friends and work colleagues, having a good and fulfilling life, one outside Gotham, outside of the depressing influence of the Wayne’s, rogues, and owls of Gotham (sorry for making this so long!! Hope you’re having a great day!! Love your work!)
No bc how dare you come into my askbox and drop the most beautiful ask I've seen while I'm sick and brain fogged /affectionate
No hate to anybody else who has sent asks, ily all, but this one HIT MY BRAIN SPASMS AKDMELAK-
BECAUSE YOU'RE SO RIGHT???
The longer it goes on, the worse the inevitable realization is for EVERYONE. Including reader. Because while there's no record of them legally, that's just because they're doing too poorly to have records.
Once you leave Gotham and start settling, you have legal documentation that you just need, you know, for life. Your ssn, birth certificate, etc. Documents that Bruce thought he had somewhere, only to find out you had requested them from Alfred when you left home.
Alfred, being the enabler he is and always hoping you'd reconnect with them one day, just gave you legal copies. Or illegal copies that are good enough to pass, idk how that stuff works.
Point is, they can find you.
BUT.
That's after they get past the emotional turmoil that the discovery puts them through. Imagine if one of them is watching the special for laughs, members of the family snickering at how fake and put together they all are on camera, elbowing each other at how prim and proper some of them are.
Then, near the ending, it cuts to a city far away from theirs. Not Bludhaven, which confuses them. The rest of them stayed, at least relatively close. So where-?
"Y/N L/N, formerly known as Y/N Wayne, has not been seen in the public eye for over a decade. While our reporters were unable to make contact, some still can't help but wonder on where this mysterious member of the beloved family-"
*Snap*
That's Jason, snapping the remote in half while staring at the screen.
Where...when...?
Half of them are confused. Three of them are starting to get a dawning realization.
Jason is having probably the biggest traumatic breakdown he's had since coming to terms with his death and resurrection.
Which town was that? Was that their actual home? Is that just stock footage? Did the reporter lie, did they find you? No, they would have shown that. Fucking vultures wouldn't keep the drama to themselves if they had the chance.
Those are thoughts that don't hit until later, honestly. He's too fucking furious to think coherently for a while.
He wants to scream at Bruce, and hit him, and Dick, and Tim, and fuck it, Alfred too a little. (Unfortunately, they probably have lost Alfred by now. The man was already old.)
He wants to both trash and treasure what's left of your room, small enough to make him feel cramped. It's the size of his old apartment bedroom! Fucking moneybags couldn't give his second ever child a better room than this???
There's no diary left behind, or anything that would bring any sense of closure. Actually, the only thing of note is a scattering of ancient newspaper articles badly taped up on the wall, mostly peeling or on the floor by now.
"BATMAN BESTS POLICE ONCE MORE- RIDDLER IN CUSTODY"
"WHAT WE KNOW ABOUT THE BOY WONDER"
"NO MORE JOKES - CLOWN IN CUSTODY"
"BATMAN'S NEWEST SIDEKICK? ROBIN REPLACED!"
"A NEW HERO? NIGHTWING DEBUTS!"
Them. It's articles about all of them. Their hero exploits, at least. None of them past his...expiration date. It looks like his death is what made you stop idolizing your family so much. Honestly, the paper is old enough to make it hard to read anything but the headlines.
There are a few sticky notes amidst the papers. Clumsy, childlike handwriting.
03/16/XXXX
Richard and Mister Wayne saved people from a bank! Bad guys almost blew em up. That's why they had to miss the concert!
07/30/XXXX
Jason couldn't have dinner because the Joker broke out, and they had to stop him again. Stay in jail! My brother is hungry!!!! >:(
XX/XX/XXXX
I hoped Richard was in town because of my birthday...I guess it was superhero stuff. But Jay remembers! Next year?
XX/XX/XXXX
Not next year :( I made a cake with Alfred instead. Gave some to Jay after he patrolled. Not as good as Alfred's yet, but he still ate it!
Notes you wrote to yourself. To hang up, to show you that even if they aren't there for you, your 'family' is full of good people. That they're doing important stuff, and that's why they can't be there for you.
As a child, you hung up a wall to show yourself why you weren't important. Why you didn't matter.
And Jason breaks.
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geralallfandoms · 1 month ago
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hi hi. could i request mark sloan x a reader that survived the plane crash? mark stopped fighting because lexie died, so something with him surviving bc the person he loved did so he has something to fight for would be so good. preferably w a happy ending or fluffy!! other than that up 2 u! love ur writing :)
Another requests yey🕺 omg I love the idea!! Please tell me if you like It , if it's what you expected or if you would like me to change something! I would really love to hear your opinion and if you liked it!!🫂 Tysm, I hope you enjoy it!
REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!
°The selfish man°
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TW: Blood, wounds, plane crash, death, shock, spoiler. (I hope I didn't forget anything)
Song I heard while writing this:
It all happened too soon.
From one moment to the next, laughter turned into screams, happiness into fear, tranquility into silence. In less than a few seconds the path of history had completely changed.
Most of those on that plane were unable to understand in time what had happened. In the blink of an eye, nature surrounded them.
After the great sound of the machines, after the plane fell onto the green grass, after it dragged itself along, taking with it trees and everything else in its path, silence reigned again.
While some were still unconscious, others were already aware of their surroundings.
The sky was the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes. Everything was confusing, and the ringing in your ears prevented you from hearing your surroundings, so you couldn't understand why you were in a forest.
You could see movement at your side, you slowly tilted your head to see how Christina moved things, maybe she was looking for something. You didn't know. You didn't know why you were in the woods, still sitting in an airplane seat.
"Reader! Hey! Hey- can you hear me?! React!" Christina screamed over and over again in your voice. The shock and adrenaline kept her alert and energized, but you couldn't understand her, you couldn't hear her.
After a while, you saw how she simply walked away from you and walked towards Meredith, who was sitting on the floor, a few meters away from where you were.
While everyone else seemed to be 100% sure of where they were or what had happened, you struggled to maintain consciousness.
But the darkness, the whispers telling you to stop fighting, got the better of you, and you decided to relax.
___________________________________________
You wished that the hand touching your shoulder and your face was your mother's, that she had simply come to let you know that breakfast was ready, that in a few minutes they would go to the beach to spend the day.
But when you opened your eyes, the first thing you saw were worried faces. Faces of... your friends?
"Reader...hey hey here I am...do you know who I am? Can you talk?" Dereck asked while holding your face in his hands.
"She's fucking deaf..." Christina said as she pointed to your bloody ears.
You wanted to tell them that you weren't completely deaf, that you could hear them faintly, but that the pain didn't let you think, speak.
Pain?
"We can't get her out of that chair..." The blonde girl said...Meredith?
You tried to understand what they were talking about, and why their faces looked so scared, but you just tried to relax, not panic. Although really, you were terrified of knowing what they were talking about, of looking down at where the pain was coming from.
Tears were pooling in your eyes and all you could think about was Mark. Where was he? What had happened to his seat, which was next to you. What had happened to Lexie, who was in front of you.
Minutes passed, or maybe it was hours? You didn't know. But you were conscious enough to realize that you were still in the airplane seat, with your seatbelt on, that you were in what was left of the plane, that you had an iron rod going through your stomach, that your ears hurt, that you couldn't move or feel your left leg, on the same side that the bar was, you could now tell that night had already fallen, that Meredith, Christina and Derek were near you, with a campfire.
You could now tell that Mark wasn't there. You couldn't see him anywhere.
"Ma-mark..." You said in a whisper, but loud enough for Derek to hear.
"You can't do this to her. You can't do this to your girl. Mark! You have to react. She has a fucking bar running from side to side of her body, she may not feel her legs, but she's awake. She's been awake for four hours, she's fighting. You can't leave her." Derek told Mark, who had refused to leave Lexie alone, who had died in front of him a few minutes ago.
"I can't leave her...Derek please...it's little Lexie..." He said trying not to look where you are.
"I know it's not easy but, fuck... I know you're not going to like it but someone has to tell you. She doesn't feel anything anymore, she doesn't suffer anymore, okay? You can let her rest, we'll give her a burial...Mark, it's Reader. Your Reader. She's suffering there, alone, she doesn't know what's going on, she hasn't spoken in four hours, she's disoriented and in shock...you can't do that to your girl..." Derek said before turning around and walking away.
"I'm here..." Mark said, who upon hearing your voice, quickly stood up and approached you. "My girl...you're okay, I'm with you..."
Mark had a bandage on his arm, and one on his torso. Because after thinking about what Derek had told him, he couldn't help but approach where Reader was. Because when he saw her awake, looking at the sky, calm, fighting to remain conscious, he knew he couldn't do that to her.
He knew he couldn't let himself die. He couldn't leave her alone. He knew she was fighting for him and it would be too selfish of him not to do the same
So he turned around and walked over to the others, confessed the pain in his chest and let them help him. He decided to keep fighting for her.
"A-are yo-you...oka-okay?" It was the first complete sentence you had managed to say all day.
Mark couldn't help but smile as he saw how, even in the condition you were in, you cared more about him than yourself.
"I'm fine honey...don't worry. Don't get stressed okay? I'll stay with you..." He said moving your hair from your face while his other hand slowly took yours.
"Thank you...f-for...ke-keep fighting..." You said, caressing his hand.
Mark was speechless.
"I know...I know something's not right...I-I can see it on your face..." You took a deep breath and continued. "I know you...I know th-that you are tired...but you are still here..." You said between ragged breaths, trying to ignore the pain.
"I will never be able to understand how you manage to guess everything... my sweetness, I am so sorry..." Mark said as he approached you until your foreheads were touching. "I've been selfish...but I won't leave...I promise..."
And Mark kept his promise, because days later, when rescue finally arrived, Mark was still with you, watching over your fever, your breathing, feeling every beat of your heart.
Because even though he had lost little Lexie that day, even though darkness and death had clouded his thoughts, he couldn't abandon you. And he never would again.
He never abandoned you. Not when you had to get hearing aids to hear better, or when you had to go to your therapies to regain mobility in your leg. He was always there.
And would be for the rest of his life.
°
°
°
And that's all! I hope you liked it! Remember that I'm delighted to read your opinions!!🫂
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neonoddeye · 2 years ago
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Heart-Stealer | Law x Gn! Reader
A/N: I will be utilizing my all-time favorite trope for this: the “there’s only one bed” trope! Yes, it’s cheesy. No, I do not care. As a side note, I wrote this for an OC I made, but I’m rewriting it bc I know no one would read it if I left it as is.
CONTENT INCLUDES: …sharing a bed (it’s sfw, just cuddling)
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“Are you sure this is okay, Law?” You ask with a crack in your voice. “I can always bug the staff for a new room…”
“It’s fine, y/n-ya”, Law replies, “I’d rather us stick together here.”
“Fair enough,” you sigh, moving your gaze up nervously towards the top of the elevator. Maybe if you hadn’t decided to accompany your captain on a trip at the last possible second, the single-bed hotel room issue would’ve been solved. Alas, the two pirates have a long night ahead of them.
I hope Law doesn’t hear my heart pounding against my chest right now…
It was a very nice hotel room; whether Law actually legally rented it or threatened a few lives for it, you didn’t know. It doesn’t matter, either, as you admire the luxury that lies before you. Nice going, captain, you remarks to yourself. Life has been new and exciting since you joined the heart pirates recently; you’d even go as far as to say it’s the best decision you’ve made in life so far. The only downside is that you’ve properly fallen for the sadistic captain, the surgeon of death, the literal heart stealer. It feels like an unspoken rule to not fall for your pirate captain, especially if he’s notorious and stands above most typical pirates. It’s not like you were trying to catch feelings for Law; he’s an anomaly in the way he makes you stop dead in your tracks, unable to move under his gaze as if he’d bound you with sea prism stone. You didn’t realize you had been lost in thought for a little too long until the man of interest interrupts your thoughts.
“You should take a shower first, y/n-ya,” he offers, placing himself on a smooth, leather swivel chair with a book already in hand.
You perk up upon hearing his voice cut the painful silence, sweet honey in your ears. “‘Kay”, you give Law a small smile before collecting your things.
The shower was, to no surprise, heavenly after having to shower in a metal box underwater for some weeks. After taking off your clothing and jewelry, you allow the deliciously hot water and its steam to envelop you and wash the day’s worries away. After stepping out, you change into a black tank top and plaid sleep shorts and gather your toiletries to finish your nightly routine. Placing yourself at a vanity, you turn to Law behind you.
“Shower’s all yours,” you smile, trying not to linger your gaze too long as Law swings his lengthy figure off the desk and carefully places his book down. You take a deep breath, closing your eyes as you try not to imagine the intimacy of having such a gorgeous man sleep next to you, even if not in a sexual context. To have him close, feel his presence intoxicate you and lull you to sleep like a drug: it’s something you’ve wished upon a star for.
Moments pass as you dry your hair until the bathroom door slides open. revealing Law in just a pair of sweatpants, his signature hat nowhere to be seen, replaced by a wet mop of jet-black hair. For a fleeting moment, you admire the mosaic of tattoos adorning his tanned skin before whipping your head back to focus on your nightly routine, finally placing the hair dryer down beside yourself. You blink a few times, noticing a rosy shade of pink dusting your pale cheeks and eyes wide enough to hold mini hearts. Soon after, you see Law approach you from behind in the mirror, his chest almost grazing your head as he reaches over to unplug the hair dryer, gingerly gathering it to use himself. The faint scent of hotel soap, mild tangerine and white tea float above you and dizzy your already jumbled senses as he walks back to the bathroom. You sit there in mild shock at the tiny gesture, thinking that Law seemed to linger there for a moment longer than needed. No matter what he did, Law was your own personal siren; your one true opponent in a world you once thought you conquered.
After some internal pep talk, you walk over to the bed, propping yourself up on two pillows as you nestle under thin, white blankets with a book in hand. You immediately feel the bed sink, signaling that Law has done the same, presumably with a book covering medicine.
“Uh… what are you reading?” Law cuts into the tension.
“It’s a book on the geography of the new world,” you respond, your nose still in said book (though you’re not entirely paying attention to it, as talking to Law is much more enthralling). “A pirate on the Oro Jackson wrote it. Not an easy find.”
“I can imagine it wasn’t easy. You’re into geography?” Law pries his gaze off his book.
“Not particularly. I just thought the book seemed interesting. Besides, the knowledge could help us.”
“Thanks for the research, but I think we’re good. I trust Bepo as a navigator.” Law gives a ghost of a smile at the last remark, either at the thought of his best friend or the sentiment of you helping him.
“What about you? Another doctor book?” you inquire, scanning the cover of the book in Law’s hands.
“Yeah. This one’s about medicinal herbs, I’m thinking about finding some on the islands we’ll come across.”
“You’re very dedicated to your work,” you compliment your crush with a glimmer in your eyes. Law’s commitment is truly admirable; you adore how intelligent he is.
“I guess,” Law shrugs. He yawns, placing the book on the nightstand beside him. “Mind if I turn the light off? We need to wake up early.”
“I don’t mind,” you say quietly, the beating of your heart becoming a little too loud for your liking as the reality of your situation sets in.
Does he feel even a bit the same way that I do right now?
Law reaches over to turn off the lamp next to him, leaving the light of the full moon to creep through sheer curtains, beautifully illuminating his sharp features. Law lies on his back, decorated arms crossed at his stomach, and you mirror him, even if it’s not the way you typically lie down to sleep. Silence passes, both parties secretly not sleeping a wink.
“Does it ever bother you?” You start, letting your words reverberate into the unfamiliar pitch black room. “It seems like the entire world is watching you. You were already a monster rookie to begin with, and now you’re a damn warlord.”
There’s silence for a few seconds, then you hear Law stir a bit. “You could say the same about yourself. You joined my crew, after all.” 
You smirk, turning your head to the side. Though you can’t see him too well, your heart swells at the thought of your face being so close to his. You silently thank the gods that you’re able to see such a handsome man this close, even with his heavy eyes and messy hair.
“I don’t think about it much. I guess it’s because I’ve been scrutinized all my life that it doesn’t bother me. I did this to myself, after all.”
“I assume you have your own reasons for being a warlord, but I won’t pry,” you respond softly.
“You’ll find out eventually. We have to face it all pretty soon,” Law sighs. “It’ll be a lot to handle.” Whatever baggage he has, you can tell it claws at him, even now.
“We’re pirates, Law, we handle tough situations all the time. I’m… happy to go through it for your sake. I mean, for the sake of the crew.” Way to cover that up at the end.
Law smiles, genuinely, at your last remark, though the darkness covers it and he turns his head to the side so you won’t see. He conceals his feelings most of the time, but when he’s truly thankful, it shows. And for you, he is eternally grateful for.
~
The moonlight of the night before is long forgotten as the morning sun engulfs the hotel room, filling your senses just enough to pull you out of slumber. To your surprise, you’re no longer at one edge of the bed, but in the middle, wrapped in Law’s arms as if you never woke up from your dream. Your eyes widen completely, breath hitching in your throat as you feel Law stir awake and see the same shock in his eyes as soon as they open. You both scramble away from each other, mumbled apologies escaping raspy morning voices as you gather yourselves. 
“I uh,” you start, “did not intend on that. I swear.” Shit, he definitely felt my heartbeat.
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” Law shakes his head awake, trying to understand why it felt so wrong to pry himself away from your warmth. He looks over to see you slightly shivering, clearly at a loss from warmth as well.
He hesitates before his next proposal. “Come here, you’re cold,” he says, extending his arm out. You pause as well, not believing your ears, before slowly bringing yourself back into Law’s chest, his arms gingerly wrapping back around you. You’re both stiff for a few moments, the rhythms of two hearts like taiko drums in the otherwise silent room.
“Is this okay, y/n-ya?” Law whispers into your hair, still stiff against you.
You smile weakly into his skin. “Yeah, it is. Don’t do this for me, though.”
“I’m not.”
Your heart leaps at the confession of Law actually wanting to be this close to you, and your shoulders finally relax into his touch as you allow yourself to relish in his warmth. He follows suit, pulling you a little closer and closing his eyes in serenity. Silence follows again as you both become overwhelmed in the feeling of touch, limbs entangled and gentle grazes of hands on skin sending you both to heaven. It doesn’t take long until you both accidentally succumb to sleep once again, and miss the free breakfast Law had intended to wake up on time for. The extra time together more than makes up for it, though.
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guess-my-next-obsession · 2 years ago
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A Warm Bed
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pairing: joel miller x f!reader
rating: E (18+ only, mature descriptions of death/apocalyptic life, blurry infidelity, unprotected PIV, dirty talk, cum play i guess, unedited/proofread bc I REFUSE)
word count: 3.4k
joel masterlist
It was freezing out today in Boston but you didn’t notice, not with the flames that burned beside you as you hoisted dead child after dead child into the makeshift mass crematorium. Ash turned your hair grey, hiding away it’s natural color until you’d shower it off later on tonight, and even then it would never completely go away, just like the smell of burning flesh would never fully leave your nostrils.
This hadn’t been the life you imagined for yourself as a child before the outbreak. You always thought you’d go into something that helped people—teaching, nursing, maybe even social work—but life couldn’t have turned out more different. Joel, your work partner, assured you once after a particularly tough shift that in a way, you were helping people. You struggled to believe it.
“Take your break,” Joel approached you, swatting your hip lightly with the back of his gloved hand as you stood watching the little girl no older than five burn in the pit, unable to take your eyes off the destruction you had a hand in causing. “Hey,” he called firmer, finally pulling your eyes from the scene, “Go take a break.”
“Can’t,” you sighed, pointing behind him at the new truck of arrivals, Joel’s head shaking just enough for you to notice it before he brought his eyes back to yours. You spotted something deeply apologetic in them, Joel having graced you with a rare bit of empathy as he studied you. “Shifts almost over anyways. Let’s just hurry up and get this truck cleared so we can all go home.”
“You’re cryin’,” he pointed out, almost angry.
“It’s the wind,” you snapped back at him as the truck backed up towards the two of you. “Come on.”
You and Joel worked more efficiently than any other duo on cremation duty, Joel’s strength and ability to shut off his emotions at will pairing excellently with your speed and determination to get the job over with. He handled the adults, you the children—it was a system that you had down pat. Two hours and at least six more trucks later, the two of you were off.
Usually, you’d go one way and Joel would go the opposite, the two of you never really interacting with each other outside of work except when you had to. He had Tess for that, and you had…well, you had yourself.
But today, Joel stuck beside you, walking with you as you left the payout line after your shift. He said nothing as he joined you through town, his shoulder grazing yours every now and then as he moved over to let someone pass on the sidewalk.
“Gotta stop and get some bread,” you announced, pointing at the general store you were approaching. Joel nodded, his eyes flickering to you.
“Should stop and get somethin’ to eat myself.” You found his company to be both strange and comforting. Joel always made you feel safe, or at least as safe as someone living in a world this unpredictable and cruel could feel.
Walking inside, he followed you as you perused the aisles, your brain working as quickly as it could to work out the cheapest plan for dinner given the throbbing headache you were dealing with from the fumes and smoke.
“Pasta,” he suggested with a point of his finger, seemingly reading your mind. “Always my go to.”
“I do have some canned tomatoes.” You reached for the loose spaghetti noodles sitting in a plastic bin in the shelf and took a guess at how much you’d need to feed you, not wanting to spend more than you absolutely needed to.
“Why don’t you come over and we can share it,” he suggested, albeit shyly. You gave him a quirked eyebrow and he rolled his eyes. “I’ll split the bill.”
“So Tess eats for free?” You chuckled and shook your head. It wasn’t that you didn’t like Tess, you just resented her for having everything you ever wanted: someone to come home to, someone to make living in this dark world worth all the strife.
“Tess is out on a run,” he informed, his tone betraying him and exposing his loneliness. “Won’t be back for a few days.”
Did he want you to be his mistress? Though you admittedly were desperate for even a semblance of affection, you were no home-wrecker. Especially not Tess’s home.
“Joel, I hope you’re not—“
“I didn’t mean it like that, I just…” He shook his head and mumbled, “Forget it.”
Feeling overwhelmed by your own need for company and the pained look in his eye, you sighed, reaching one hand over to touch his shoulder.
“Sure. Let’s share.”
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“Knock, knock,” you called as you pushed open the door to Joel’s apartment, having only been there once before to his flask that he’d left at work by mistake.
“Come in,” Joel’s indifferent rasp welcomed you.
“Brought some beers, too.” You gave him an unsure smile as you watched him buzz around his kitchen, a pot boiling the pasta from earlier while he tended to the sauce in another pan.
“Thank you,” he gave you a flicker of a smile as you set one of the beers on the counter beside him.
“Got a bottle opener?” You knew the answer to that was clear from the amount of beer bottles in his trash can, but didn’t want to snoop around for it without his consent.
“Yeah,” he left the stove and walked over to a drawer, pulling out the metal tool and handing it over to you so that you could open yours first.
“Ran into your brother on my way over,” you announced, watching as he scoffed and rolled his eyes. “He’s getting in deep with Marlene’s group, huh?”
“I told him to stay far away from all that,” he scolded you as though it was your doing. “Boy don’t listen for shit.”
“Just saw them hanging three Fireflies yesterday,” you lamented with a shake of your head. You weren’t sure if you bought into the group’s ideology, and you especially weren’t a fan of their methods for going about change, but you knew they didn’t deserve to be executed.
“Yeah, well, if you see Tommy up there, do me a favor and keep it to yourself.” Joel walked back to the stove and kept his eyes focused on the food, a silence falling over the two of you for a while.
“Thanks,” you finally spoke as Joel set your plate down in front of you at his tiny dining table before seating himself in front of you.
“You doin’ alright?” he asked in between bites, his eyes now seemingly unable to look anywhere else but directly into yours. You felt flushed at the attention he was showing you, but tried to pay it little mind.
“Yeah, I’m…fine,” you lied. “Just waiting for my own Tess to come along, I guess.”
“Tess and I aren’t Romeo and Juliet for fucks sake,” he lowered his eyes to his plate and spun his fork around to collect the pasta. “Just two people.”
“Yeah, but at least there’s someone,” you argued. “When I go home…it’s just me and my cold bed.”
“Believe it or not, but my bed gets cold too.” There was something in his voice tonight, something that hadn’t ever been there before, or at least not that you’d noticed. Your eyes locked and you felt something stir inside of you that both thrilled you and filled you with immense guilt.
Of course the one person in Boston you wanted to get into bed with was taken.
Not knowing what to say, you let out an airy chuckle and looked down at your nearly empty plate, missing the way Joel eyed you like a man on a mission.
“Look if you’re worried about Tess,” he started, sitting back in his chair and stretching his legs out underneath the table. “Don’t be.”
“Oh yeah? Would Tess say the same?” You lifted your eyes only to be punched in the gut by his rugged handsomeness. Working with him as long as you had had conditioned you to his above-average looks, seeing him dirty and covered in ash everyday made it easier to pretend he was just like every other man in town, but with him clean, sitting in front of you, having just cooked you a meal, and now nearly begging you to consider sharing a bed with him tonight? It wasn’t so easy.
“Tess and I ain’t—,” he started, pausing to let out a soft sigh. “We both have gone outside of this…before. Her more than me, but that’s ‘cause I’m not much for all that.”
“You and Tess are open?” you asked in amused disbelief, having never imagined the couple in their fifties, although neither of them looked too old by any means, spreading their love throughout the zone.
“I didn’t say that.” He tapped his fingers on the table. “Just said it happens.”
“Joel, I don’t want Tess at my door,” you sighed, finding it harder and harder to stick to your morals the longer he stared at you.
“She won’t,” he promised. “Besides, I ain’t asking for—look, I’m just offerin’ a warm bed. That’s all.”
“Just a warm bed?” You hated that that disappointed you.
“Just a warm bed.”
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You knew the minute you curled up next to him that tonight wouldn’t simply be about staying warm together or keeping each other company. The ache between your thighs was incessant as you rested your head on his chest, his natural scent that might have been considered musky pre-outbreak sent you reeling. It had been years since you felt another person’s warmth this way, let alone a man. You found yourself moving closer and closer, tossing your leg over his and hugging your arm around his waist to soothe the building desire for more. Joel didn’t seem to mind.
“Here—“ He shifted onto his side, pulling you flush against his body. Your leg rested over his hip, his thigh planted firmly between yours as he gave you space to bury your face in his neck. “Better?”
“Joel—“ you exhaled shakily, not sure you even wanted to finish the thought. Joel pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, both of you staring at each other in silence for a few tense seconds before he started to lean in. His lips simply grazed yours, not even molding with yours yet, but he managed to pull a needy moan out of you.
“Sweet thing,” he cooed, kissing his way across your chin, his beard scratching at your skin and his lips pressing against your pulse. “How long has it been?”
“Years,” you confessed breathily, your eyes closed as you allowed yourself to enjoy the feeling of his lips against your skin, the heat of his palms as they ran up and down your side, the increase of pressure of his thigh against your core.
“That’s too damn long,” he husked in a mumble as he rolled you onto your back, his warmth never leaving you as he rolled right on top of you.
“You’re sure—“ Your words were interrupted by his hips pressing into yours, the barrier of your clothes doing little to prevent you from feeling him. “Fuck, you’re sure Tess won’t kill me for this?”
“I’m sure,” he soothed, pressing his lips to yours finally, one arm holding him up while his other hand slid up your side, dragging your sweater up with it. “This somethin’ you want?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, lacing your fingers in his salt and pepper waves. “I think it’s something I need.”
“I need you too,” he confessed, sitting back on his ankles so that he could look at you spread out beneath him. Even covered in your dingy, well-worn winter clothes, Joel devoured the sight of you unabashedly, his hands roaming from your sides down to your hips and to your thighs as they spread to give his hips room to fit. “Been imagining’ this for years now.”
“Yeah right,” you chuckled a scoff, rolling your eyes.
“Don’t matter if you think I’m lyin’,” he replied, his hands sliding the hem of your sweater up until he was lifting it over your head. “I know I’m tellin’ the truth.”
You wanted to believe that all these years Joel had harbored a desire for you, but the concept just seemed too unrealistic, too fantastical to be true.
“Look at you,” he praised, hands smoothing over the long-untouched skin of your stomach until he was cupping your breasts through your worn-out bra, his eyes exposing his reverence.
“You’re good at flattery,” you teased as you tried not to let yourself read too much into his praise. Just a warm bed. That’s all this was.
Joel said nothing. Instead, he lowered his lips to your sternum, kissing every inch of you he could reach as he slid your bra straps down your shoulders before reaching underneath your arched back to pop the hooks undone.
He looked like a crazed man as he took in the sight of your bare breasts, a subtle growl slipping from his lips as he leaned down to capture one of your nipples in his mouth, the feeling of his tongue swirling around the sensitive bud causing you to buck your hips up against his.
“Take these off,” he ordered, tugging on your belt loops as he pulled himself away from you to stand up off the bed and strip himself.
You struggled with your jeans as you tried not to miss a moment of watching him shed his layers, your hands shaking as they fought with the rigid denim at your ankles before finally freeing yourself. Joel nearly pounced on you as his eye caught a glimpse of the wet patch on your underwear, his hips fitting between your open thighs as he covered your naked body with his own, his cock prodding at your covered mound as he kissed you breathless.
Nothing about him was graceful, nothing about him was tender, but you didn’t want him any other way. You needed to feel his desire for you, to feel how animalistic your body turned him. His rough palms and scratchy beard burned your skin, and you found yourself hoping you’d feel him for weeks to come.
“Can I taste you?” he asked against your pulse as he littered your neck with tiny marks, society far past caring about scandalous things like that.
“Only if you want,” you answered, having never actually experienced a man going down on you before. Joel sat back on his ankles and gave you a wicked half-smirk, his calloused thumb stroking over your kiss-swollen bottom lip.
“Trust me,” he rasped. “Been thinkin’ about licking you clean since the moment I met you.”
“And yet you never thought to tell me,” you teased, your cheeks heating from his confession.
“You’re at least half my age, sweet thing,” he reasoned as he kissed down your stomach until he was laying between your open thighs. “Never thought you’d want an old man like me in your bed.”
“You need to get your eyes checked, Miller,” you brushed his hair out of his face as he slid your panties off. “You’re beautiful.”
“For an old man?”
“For any man.” Joel turned tender for a moment and met your eyes, his hands that were gripping your thighs now rubbing softly.
“You’re too good for this place,” he murmured as he leaned in, licking a broad strip up your cunt and flicking the tip of his tongue over your clit. Your back arched off the bed from the jolts of pleasure, your reaction earning you another smile.
“You asking me to—oh—to run away with you, Miller?” you asked between his sloppy laps at your cunt, his tongue feeling better than you could have ever dreamed it up to be.
“I ain’t that crazy,” he husked, voice thick with arousal before he dived back in.
Joel ate you out like a man starved, even though he’d just cooked you the best dinner you’d had in a while. You wanted to run your hands through his hair, to watch him as he shed a layer of himself for you, but you controlled yourself.
“Fuck,” he hummed as his tongue flicked at your swollen bud until your thighs were shaking around his face. “You gonna cum on my tongue, baby?”
Your eyes were squeezed shut but you pried them open to look down at him, nodding furiously. Joel grinned and sucked your clit, the tiny change in pace sending you over the cliffs of bliss without much warning.
“Shit,” you choked out, body shaking and spasming from the first orgasm you’d had in a long time. Joel kept licking at you, but he was soft, gentle, tender.
“You taste like heaven, you know that?” he rasped as he kissed his way up your body until he was sharing your taste with you with his tongue down your throat. You could only mewl and grab at him as he held himself up with one arm and used his other to guide his cock up and down your slick center. “Bet you feel like heaven, too. Can I?”
“Take whatever you need from me, Joel. I’m yours tonight,” you promised, still stuck in a post-climactic haze. Joel moaned as he stuck the tip of his cock inside of you, just enough for you to feel him. “Don’t tease—
“M’not teasin’, just don’t wanna hurt you.” Joel waited a beat before inching in a bit more, his brows screwing up in pleasure. “Also don’t wanna finish as fast as I think I am.”
“I don’t care,” you cooed, drunk on him being only halfway inside of you and still showing up every man you’d ever slept with. “You have all night to impress me.”
“I haven’t already?” he asked, tone hinting at playfulness but it went missed by you as the tip of his cock prodded at something blinding inside of you. “Fuck, that’s it, ain’t it?” He thrust against the spot proudly, a smirk growing on his otherwise wrecked face. “Flutterin’ against me every time I hit it.”
“Joel, fuck,” you whined, gripping him by the neck and pulling him down for a kiss.
He rested on his elbows, your thighs draped high over his waist as he rocked into you deep and purposefully until you were seeing stars.
“So tight,” he panted in your ear. “So warm. Fuck, you are heaven, ain’t ya?”
“Joel, your cock is so fucking—“ He stole every ounce of coherency from you as he sat back on his heels and pressed your thighs against your chest. With an open jaw and blurry vision, you cried out for him, his thrusts growing harder and more brutal with every plea for more that slipped from your lips.
“God damn—“
“Joel, I’m gonna—“
“Come on, baby. Let me have it.” Joel snarled from the exertion it was taking to fuck you into bliss, but he showed no signs of stopping, his firm hands gripping your thighs to keep them pressed to your chest.
“Oh my god,” you slurred as you entered euphoria for the second time, this time being washed over in it like a cleansing. A sinful, lustful, dirty cleansing.
“Yes!” he growled, grinning with pride. “So fuckin’ good for me. Gonna cum, too. That what you want baby?”
You nodded through your daze. “In my mouth.”
“Jesus—“ he choked on his approval and pulled out of you to crawl over to where your head rested on the pillow, his fist stroking his cock all the while. You opened your eyes, stuck your tongue out, and with a smile you pushed him over the edge. He moaned without care for his volume as his cum painted your tongue, face, and chest with every drop of what he had to offer.
“Mm,” you hummed as you cleaned some of the mess off your chest with your finger and sucked it off. Joel crumbled into the bed against you, his lips cheek against your shoulder while he recovered. “That was nice for just a warm bed.”
“Yeah,” he huffed out a chuckle. “I could…give you a warm bed another time…if you’d like.”
“Well, it is going to be a long winter. Might as well stay warm when I can.” You rolled your head to the side to watch him, his eyelashes fluttering against his cheek as he laid there with his eyes closed, half asleep. “Goodnight, Joel. And…thank you.”
No response came, his snores signaling he was already lost in dreamland. With a content sigh, you stood up and walked into his bathroom to clean yourself off and get dressed.
You didn’t stay in the warmth of his bed that night, or any night thereafter, but you did come back. Over and over again, you came back.
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scoobydoodean · 11 months ago
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Hey there, I have SPN Thought Worms i thought you might appreciate: You know how there’s debate wether (in the biblical story) Abraham “failed” God’s test, if it was a blind loyalty test or to see if he’d put his moral and love over unquestioned orders? In the same vein, do you think Dean truly ‘failed’ Death’s test with the ring and carrying out his duties for the day? Like maybe Death actually wanted Dean to be unable to do it bc it proved he had limits or smth? Or did he just get Sam’s soul back despite the apparent failure because he has a massive soft spot for Dean? (relatable tbh). Hope I made myself clear lol, the concept is jumbled-up in my mind, and have a great day!
This is a really interesting question! I also have a feeling I'll have a lot better of an answer when I get to 6.11 on this rewatch and have the entire season fresh on my mind. That said, Death actually says in the end that the goal was for Dean to learn something.
DEATH Today, you got a hard look behind the curtain. Wrecking the natural order's not quite such fun when you have to mop up the mess, is it? This is hard for you, Dean. You throw away your life because you've come to assume that it'll bounce right back into your lap. But the human soul is not a rubber ball. It's vulnerable, impermanent, but stronger than you know. And more valuable than you can imagine. So... I think you've learned something today. (x)
I'd really like to watch through season 6 again to solidify this one for myself, but I have a feeling that this isn't about teaching Dean a personal moral lesson at all. I don't think Death is at all concerned with the fact that the nurse died because the little girl didn't from a moral perspective—he wouldn't have ever given Dean his ring if he was. That isn't why he said "good" when Dean said he would have acted differently if he could go back. We can guess it also isn't just a simple lesson about "bringing each other back" being bad and "letting go", because that'd be pretty hypocritical given Death is going to help Dean anyway with no one forcing his hand (and he tells us Dean has use). It isn't a moral issue Death's addressing. It's a lesson he's giving on the structure of the universe. It's about balance. As Death says cryptically later in the scene:
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I think what Death wanted to get across to Dean is that souls must pass on, and their energy must be allotted to the appropriate areas in time and space. If one person doesn't die, passing their soul on as energy, another person must die so that a certain balance and energy level is maintained in the universe. Death plans to help Dean from the beginning, because "Right now, you're digging at something. The intrepid Detective. I want you to keep digging, Dean."
Death, as a person who can't ultimately involve himself without also disrupting balance, is ultimately hinting at Dean as best he knows how that he wants him to stop Crowley and Cas from sucking a bunch of souls out of Purgatory, creating absolute chaos. But he can't say that, so instead, he gives Dean a lesson. He tells Dean that human souls are extremely valuable, and that they need to go to the places the universe wants them to go and stay there. If they don't—if they are moved on a large scale—something terrible will happen. Death has to expect Dean to extrapolate all of this information, which is not an easy expectation to fulfill.
So I guess to summarize: I don't think Dean failed Death's test, because actually using the ring and experiencing what happened when Dean tried to change things was more of a lesson than a test. The test was how Dean reflected on the lesson after and evaluated his behavior. He passed when he said he'd behave differently if he could go back. Death wanted Dean to understand the idea of balance in the universe depending on where souls go, and how important it is not to disrupt their flow or move them around. Changing things makes bad things happen. When there's just one soul, the impact is small (something Death is willing to let Dean toy with by offering his ring for the day). But what if someone disrupted the flow of many many souls at once?
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yuseirra · 2 months ago
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This isn't totally about 162 so I'll just post this without a read more:
Here I am trying to make sense out of things that don't~ it's times like this I realize I have a brain because I can feel it running frantically on its own in the background like CPU to form an analogy to make it all work together.
It's really confusing...tbh,
By the way, WHY did Kamiki acknowledge Ai was just your normal, ordinary girl if it were to come to this? It's what's helped me build my understanding around this guy, is that idea still relevant? About Kamiki still loving Ai even while seeing her as a person?
At this point, I won't be surprised if the author writes they changed what they originally planned bc they saw the reactions that insisted Kamiki should be a villain, because what's been going on totally contradicts what he's said back there. He DIDN'T have to say it, no one expected the character to make such a statement but he did, was there a point in that? That was the line he's made that sold me the idea that him and Ai could have really been a match as well as Ai's video.
Yeah, it's probably that Kamiki broke down after Ai passed? Because he couldn't bear her presence fading away year after year after her death, so he couldn't accept that and wanted to become closer to her somehow(through this bizzare reasoning he's formed)
So, this motive of his isn't about her popularity or how well she's known to the public, it's more about the way he "feels" about her. Because... Yeah, killing someone who surpasses Ai doesn't really automatically lead to her suddenly being acknowledged more by the public. It's really hard to form that sort of connection, wouldn't it?; and why do something like that during when Ai's still alive? It would have taken place after she's gone away.
Would it really be that he changed only because she left him? That wouldn't be it, could it?; she had his kids!! He could have gone and met them! The fact that she's alive and he could meet her would BE proving her presence and significance. So I do insist on the idea that Hikaru started growing the way he is after Ai's passing.
It does also align with the song's vibes on how he can't bear to live without her and would sacrifice anything, to fill in what's missing and all that. The song also states that he's accepted this sort of fate he is, and that he "wants to get closer to the only Ai"
So yes, it's determined that Fatal is really indeed his song.
In that case though, how DOES doing what he does make him grow closer to her?; Is there something that's made him convinced it'd actually prove to do so and an idea that has some sort of solid base or reality, or is it just him having a vague feeling of twisted closeness towards Ai? Goodness, what's gotten into him?
In an analysis I wrote sometime back, I wrote this must be the way he felt after Ai's death:
He hasn’t been able to move on at all. It’s like he was unable to take a single step forward from the moment Ai died. He’s probably been living with that kind of deep sorrow and despair, thinking he deserves to suffer as punishment, and he might have intentionally kept those feelings alive. That’s why I believe this character would’ve tried to undo the situation. To him, it’s as if time hasn’t passed at all… He just couldn’t accept Ai’s death, so he’d wish, even at the cost of anything, that it hadn’t happened, and maybe he wished he were dead instead of her. Without Ai, as the lyrics say in the song, he can't go on living. He doesn’t even want to live. If there had been any hope of saving her, I think he would’ve clung to it. If such a hope didn't exist, it would’ve been tough for him to hold on to these emotions for so long.
He really could not move on at all, huh...
But would he be worth sympathizing with or deserve some sort of pity if he only results to this... He's the one Ai loves and risked so much for, I really, really wanted that to be the case. Now I just don't know. Ai should smack him back to his senses if it is that he's lost it;
I really should give up on the idea that he wanted to bring Ai back to life at this point (even if that's what he wanted, I guess he's already crossed the line)
But why have lyrics like that in Mephisto, I wonder;; that song really ISN'T Aqua either. It's about wishing the dead back.
Hm.. It could be that he really did want her back but since that's what's impossible, he wanted to become like her by taking lives that he deems as valuable as Ai's and that really was all there is to it.
It'd be.. Sad if the guy Ai loved only amounts to this much though, I can sense his desperation and how significant Ai was to him, she really WAS his everything, but... That's not someone Ai should wish to save. He really should rot with all those lives he's taken(if he's ACTUALLY done so)so I wonder.
This turn of events would make sense and I'd have accepted it in one go if only 153-154 did not exist, so I really have to wonder what the author wants to do with that... Man, he seems too far gone repair,
REALLY!! Maybe he's really possessed and needs to undergo Misogi you know?? Sarutahiko is THE symbol of misogi.. Involves salt and water -_-)
Mephisto and Fatal really turned out to be his song!! I believe so? Because Aqua is not about wanting to meet someone beyond death again?? He's not all about I can't bear to live without you, what should I use to fill in what's missing?
So is this all there is to those songs? They seem too strong to be left at this. I feel it should be displayed in a more obvious and significant way within the story if it's tied this strongly. I'd do that if I were to be a comic writer because it'd be a perfect opportunity to bring a catharsis, but again, who knows? Mhm, I'll just stand back and read a few more chapters.
Seriously why introduce the idea that he was as far as being "noble"? There is no point in that if he results to someone that can kill their own child for some ridiculous reason. And some parts of the lyrics always stood out so much for me... Is it really natural for your average person to say things like embaracing destiny or fallen-ness, reincarnation, forgotten who I lived as, etc? Become someone else? I wonder if there is point to hope, but I do really want some explanations regarding why those whole had to be mentioned.
Will then, till next chapter drops!
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lilarus · 19 days ago
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4, 6 and 16 for sires
1, 10 and 14 for sunny
8, 15 and 18 for haev..
n for sires and mcraak and alsp sunny and all his partners. i love vacations..
📝 whatever this means, for you..
<4
Oh my goodness, so much to write, thank you my king 🫡 I will endeavor to make this second OC Ask of mine good <3
TW: mentions of death, grief, abuse
So this is reallllllllllly long bc I like to yap so I'll hide the rest of it after Sirestia's firsts
Sirestia:
4. First time experiencing grief
OUGH. You know I love these sorts of questions, especially for Sires.
Their first time experiencing grief was when Rastis, their parent, died. They were young when Rastis passed away, but they weren't so young that they didn't know that it wasn't a natural death. Aras, their mother, tried her best to teach them about death and what it meant and that Rastis was with them always, even when they felt nothing around them. Sires understood that this was the way that Aras had to cope because she knew the manner in which her spouse had died.
What makes it hit home just that bit more is that, as a young adult, when they were abused, they forgot about this. Millennia later when they were finally able to process everything (after a breakdown) they realize just how much they lost due to that abuse, and it hits them again.
6. First time they realized their "calling" in life
So, what if I told you they never really experienced this 🤔🫣 They were brought up with care and love and tenderness, then it was stripped away from them, turned into something disgusting, and then were Mer-Made-Weapon, even moreso than they had been under their "family." They did whatever they wanted because they wanted to. So becoming Master Forger for the Dragon Cult? They wanted to have a strong influence over the cult. Being the one to hold trials for higher priesthood in said cult? They could pick and choose best candidates, ones who shouldn't defect. Using their overwhelming strength and abilities to dominate a battlefield? They needed to feel something after coming out to nothing. There's never been any calling for them, but they've found ways to be something that they wanted or needed to. And in current times, that just happens to be a really good parent 🤲
16. First thing they remembered feeling ashamed of
Not being able to help Aras when they were taken from her side... They were old enough, they knew how to fight, they had Hircine's Blessing (which made them a Panther Shifter), but it was too sudden, there was too much, and by the time the overwhelm was done, she was dead and they were far from her. In dreams they had about her death, they almost blamed her for sheltering them, but this was never the case. They blamed themself years later, once they were stronger, more able to take revenge, and unable to get their hands on her killers. They could have- SHOULD HAVE done more...but they didn't...
Misunmar:
1. First big aspiration (i.e. what did they want to be when they grew up?)
So first thing to note, for the readers at home (aka. those who don't already know) Misunmar used they/them in childhood and then moved to he/him in late adolescence and onwards. So to this, when I talk about Sunny's past, I use they/them.
N E Way back to Sunny.
They wanted to be an all powerful deity of love because with the power of love surely they could bring back everyone who'd been taken from their family. They'd bring back Sires's parents, their and Raseyl's birth parents, Miraak's family, Frea's mother, Yllwyn's mother, friends that everyone lost along the way. They wanted the biggest family so full of love and care and warmth.
Of course, though, even with the realization that he was Dibella incarnate, he could never achieve this.
10. First time adopting/taking care of a pet
If Vassani counts then it's from adolescence. I joke. He himself has never had a pet BUT he was tasked to look after some of Sires and Miraak's pets when they went on little adventures outside of Skyrim. He was okay at it but not great, Vassani and Kalyrithia had to help him quite a bit.
I prommy he gets better when his millions of kids ask for pets and he can't find it in his heart to say no.
14. First time facing their fears
So I'm not quite sure that he ever fully realizes them or lets them take control enough to have to face them, basically, he runs away from a lot of them. Or straight up ignores them.
His fear is being left alone, no one to love and no one to love him back. And it's agonizing for him, to watch his beloveds light slowly flicker and fade away. He becomes near obsessive over their old belongings and anything that could remind him of them. All the magics he has couldn't stop them from meeting their end at some stage, even though it prolongs his. So, when his descendents no longer know him as anything but a distant relative, he finally runs away, and further into his fear. He goes to the Second Era.
Haev:
8. First time they took a risk, or the biggest risk they've ever taken
Their biggest risk was letting their mother close enough to them to endanger their family. They only remember fragments and they don't want to remember more, but in those fragments they know that by allowing themself and their sister to dine with their mother they spelled out their doom. It ended with their becoming a vampire and, to their knowledge, their sister's death.
15. First thing they remember feeling proud of
When Sirestia commended their ability to learn thu'um. It was small but they were madly crushing on Sires (honestly who wouldn't) and so it felt like more. They'd learned the remaining words for Unrelenting Force, and the first word for Whirlwind Sprint from the Greybeards, they showed off the power that was packed within their tiny form. And Sires had appreciated it. They couldn't remember any other praise before that and they'd never felt nearly as powerful.
18. First example of real character growth along their journey
It's hard to say where exactly it is because they grow in small doses rather than grand displays of it but it really starts after Sires dies. Or at least that's the most notable instance of it. But the beginning is after they return from Solstheim, months after it actually, when they realize that Sirestia AND Miraak were right about power being more than the physicality that they thought it was. However, Haev has a tendency to yoyo they grow and regress and grow again and regress again. Unfortunately, it's how they learn and how they tend to grow.
N. First road-trip/vacation together
Sirestia and Miraak
For just the two of them, it's in Fourth Era after the kids have all grown up. They venture out to Craglorn, after hearing about ancient ruins that could still be there,. From there they go to Rivenspire, down to Gold Coast, and consider going all the way to the bottom to Tamriel, to Khenarthi's Roost. They're gone for no more than six months as they travel by dragon or even just try their hands at flying themselves (with Dragon Aspect, that I hc has wings). And while you'd think they might travel on the same dragon, they don't. In part, because they don't want to be too heavy for the dragon, and another because they want to race and see who will get to their destination first and neither of them know where they're going. They get back and they have so many souvenirs for the kids.
For them with the family, it's just after Haev and Miraak are back in Skyrim. The group take a tour around the cities, visiting ones Sires had just taken the children to and more that they hadn't stopped by- getting into trouble in some of them too.
Misunmar and all his partners™️
He has too many partners (there's only four of them. at one time. in Fourth Era. but there's on in Second Era) and too many trips he's taken with all of them. All together, in 4E, Sunny and partners will go travel to each of his partners' places of origin or their family's. So they go to Druadach Mountains first, because it is the closest, then to somewhere near Skaven in Hammerfell. And finally to Khenarthi's Roost.
📝. Pick a character: first draft of that character + the final version of that character
Oh gods... Making me decide like this...
I don't even know if I have first drafts of Sirestia anymore. Especially not in writing... Once I find them I will let you know :)
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alumort · 7 months ago
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Ao3
HIYA so i havent been promoting new fics here bc.. i forgor.. but i rlly like this one
exploring nejis mental illness through fic /hj (nejilee exes that later date while shikalee married, polyam moment... but that wont happen until maany chapters go on XD)
Hope you enjoy (if u do id love to read your thoughts on this... ty....)
He was on the battlefield, protecting his cousin from a certain death– fulfilling his role as a Side branch member at last, following his destiny that no matter how hard he tried to fight, Neji knew well it was just bound to happen one day.
He had received the attack for her, no matter what his fate would be. All the boy knew is that it would still be way better than what the Main branch would do to him, had they known that he didn’t die for one of the heiresses…
Neji fell to the ground, body going numb in mere seconds. He could see blood escaping from where the wooden stakes had hit him, and from his mouth– he was dying, and there was nothing to do to avoid it.
“NEJI!” a familiar voice screamed, and he was held in someone's arms– Lee was crying while holding him, lips shaking as he spoke.
But Neji couldn’t hear whatever it was that his boyfriend said, for his ears were ringing too loudly to even let him think; all he knew was that he would die soon, see his father once more after so many years…
And he closed his eyes, awaiting for the sweet peace of death, knowing he could do nothing to avoid his fate. Even if he survived somehow, his Clan wouldn’t allow him to live freely, forcing him to marry a woman he didn’t even know just for appearance’s sake.
Not being able to be with Lee… it was better just to die in his arms, to wait for him on the other side.
His eyes soon saw a bright light, and Neji knew it was time to go. Though his head hurt afterwards, and his eyes seemed to open on their own, as if waking up from a long, long nap. He felt exhausted as hell. The brunet just wanted to go back to sleep once more, so comfortable on his bed that he didn't want to wake up at all; He was tired. Why couldn't he just go and rest for a bit longer? Although his body probably wouldn't allow it, knowing himself. His back hurt a lot.
Much less when the boy could feel two people around him, judging by how little his senses could tell him– a familiar chakra accompanied by someone unknown, though neither of them had any kind of malicious intent.
“Papa, I think he's awake,” he heard one of them say, and only then did the brunet open an eye again, enough to see but to not be affected by the light. “Um– good morning, Neji.”
Another voice chuckled at this, and it wasn’t someone he didn’t know; rather, it was different… Deeper, somehow. Changed.
“Metal, he has been asleep for a decade, I do not think he will–”
And then he saw it– the same face he had fallen in love with, albeit more tired, older… shocked to be able to look at his eyes, as if it was an oddity of sorts.
Lee immediately went towards him, a clear confusion in his face as he analyzed the situation, unable to believe it at all. Neji tried to speak but only a weak cough was able to escape from his lips, and no matter how hard he tried he wasn't able to even lift an arm. His body was too tired, deteriorated for some reason he couldn't understand.
Though, if what Lee had said was true… that would mean he had been in a coma for a long, long time. No wonder his muscles had gotten atrophied due to not being used at all for years.
Of course. Ten years had passed, and he hadn't moved a single millimeter of his body.
“Neji?! You are– you woke up! It has been so long!” his boyfriend said, and Neji could tell he was trying to hold back tears; careful as always, Lee attempted to hold his hands, still not comprehending what was going on but joyful nonetheless. “Oh, Neji, we thought you would never– but you woke up!”
“But– but I told you he would do it!” Metal chimed in with a pout, crossing his arms against his chest.
Now that the brunet could get a better view of his companions, he realized Lee had a beautiful ring on one of his fingers, and that the small boy was… pretty much a copy of him, albeit with some changes. Neji felt his head hurting due to the mix of confusion and shock, and not being able to say anything only agitated him more.
Of course. Life had gone on, an entire decade had passed, and Lee continued with his life. Anyone would have in his place, yet… Neji felt a pang in his heart.
“L… love,” he managed to mumble after long, long seconds, and Lee just… let go of his hands, denying with his head at the mention of the nickname.
Metal was the most confused out of the three now, looking from one adult to the other for answers without saying anything at all.
“Neji, I– I never imagined I would speak with you again. I am married, and I have children now,” the taijutsu master replied, looking away. His son observed the situation in silence, looking a bit anxious now. “Shikamaru and I… it just happened. We can still be friends, but that is it.”
He had been expecting it, yet Lee's words didn't hurt less; Neji felt his heart shattering in pieces on the spot, lips trembling– he looked away, not really in the mood to look his now-ex in the eyes anymore. Only wanting to be swallowed by the thin hospital blanket covering his body.
“... fine,” Neji muttered, feeling tears threatening to go out, though he just inhaled to calm himself down and… repress them, as usual.
“I will help you with whatever you need to heal, alright? I probably need to call the nurse… but you will not be alone on this, Neji. I will make sure of that!” Lee added in an attempt to cheer him up, though the brunet wasn't listening anymore.
He felt alone, anyways, with his mind stuck years in the past. Not even his companion's bright smile managed to fill the newfound hole in his heart– and honestly, he just wanted to rest, close his eyes and fall into the same deep slumber he had just gotten out of.
His fate had always been the worst, and it was clearer with every passing day. It would've been better if he had just died during the war– that way, Neji would've never seen Lee moving on without him, he wouldn't be struggling with his lack of movements and newfound weakness.
It was a torture. His boyfriend– ex, was so close yet so far, and the doctors immediately went to help him recover as fast as they could. Sakura personally was supervising his case no matter how complicated being the Hokage and the Head Doctor was at the same time, wanting to heal him as possible.
But it was complicated– he had no reason to heal, after all. So why bother? Neji didn't feel any kind of enthusiasm about getting out of the hospital, knowing well he would be alone again, unable to even walk on his own because of his damaged muscles… he hated how slow he had become, not only in his movements but also in reading.
His brain had forgotten certain words and phrases, and kanji was not an easy task anymore. Neji didn't like going back to the beginning, even if the doctors said it was good for him.
He should've just died. That would've been more merciful, but fate had never been kind. Of course it would keep him alive, solely to play with his feelings… he should've expected it.
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vacantgodling · 2 years ago
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40%. If your character were to come face to face with their darkest fears in a nightmare, what would be the scene?
thank you for asking!! this did take me a bit to answer tho rip,,, i’m gonna do this for the main tcol kiddos bc they have more interesting answers 🌚
forte’s nightmare would be set at his family home in bass landing. it would be quiet; eerily quiet; his small neighborhood is always bursting with sounds whether it be from the forest or the river or the bugs or the sounds of the singing and laughter from townsfolk. just dead silence. he would creep up to his home, on edge but realize that he has no weapons. he decides he’ll make do. he pushes open the door to his home and instead of finding his family dead or alive there’s nothing. there’s just…. lingering tension. everything is perfect too perfect; nothing is out of place. he can’t help but feel like something is wrong yet there isn’t anything he can point to to explain that.
clear is a hard one to have nightmares bc he’s been through so much so much of his worst nightmares are honestly reliving old memories. the one that does terrify him the most is the argument he had with his father when he ran away from home. there was shouting, his mother and siblings cowering in the corner, and his father condemning him for everything he’s ever done wrong in his eyes and for wanting to leave at all and just. feeling the weight of his disappointment makes clear unable to breathe 😞
deux’s nightmares always happen on a cliff. she’s standing there with her older brother, and they’re talking again! she feels happy and like things are going back to normal, and they’re looking over the mountains like they used to as children… until her brother stands. turns his back to her and calls her weak or worthless or anything like that. when she tries to reach for him, the cliff they’re on breaks apart — and depending on the nightmare either she’ll fall into darkness or he will. just depends on how her brain wants to fuck with her! if she falls off the cliff then it’s the fear that if something happens her brother won’t save her. if he falls off the cliff then it’s her fear that he’s right and she’s too weak to save him.
san’s nightmares tend to be repetitive; she’s doing some task over and over again and others are moving forward and winning or completing the task but she’s stuck in this limbo. like for instance she’ll be running a race but the finish line is always so far away. when people pass them, they’ll say oh they’re so slow oh they aren’t as competent as they say they are. so they’ll run faster and harder to try and get there… but nothing changes. she can’t give up though bc that would be worse than this purgatory so eventually she just burns herself out.
piper tbh does not have nightmares at least until after a particular canon event happens and it’s just reliving that moment so i’ll put it under the cut cuz it’s a MAJORRR spoiler
piper’s nightmares are always her reliving keevan’s death over and over. nothing ever changes and she can never save him and it haunts her.
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plushbunbun-blog · 2 years ago
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Video's Last Patient
Video's reference sheet above. Her "short" story below. (WARNING: suicide, death, murder) Video was on a walk like she did any other night, when an addison fell flat on the ground in front of her. Green addison stared in shock at what happened just now but quickly realised she's not looking at a dead body yet. Building was tall, bot seemed not tall enough to kill the suicidal fool. He looked pretty... broken nonetheless. Video, knowing how will it end if she'll leave him, patched him up as fast and as good as she could and took him to her sheltered place (name it home but it's a really small apartment with covered windows).
Vid tried to force some healing food in him but he was unable to swallow. So she fed him some liquid to keep him alive and to let him at least start the healing process.
After two weeks or so, the addison started responding to being fed. Healing sped up from there.
Third week, the addison opens his eyes and tries to talk. Video was fine with him not speaking but once she heard a sound coming out of him she ducked behind a desk, nervously checking if he's moving or not. He got into sitting position while groaning from pain and looked around. Then she heard him speak full sentence for the first time since she brought him here.
"What the hell?". Silence . . . "Who the fuck are you??"
She shuddered, made a weird sound and tried to curl into a smallest ball possible.
"Stop pretending you're not here. Who are you??"
It took a long while and a lot of stuttering from the green addison to answer to any of his questions.
"I'm Video!" She shouted and ducked down again. Addison on the bed was silent for a second.
"I'm . . . I'm Copycat". He said, not sure how to continue the conversation.
But somehow they did.
It took days for Video to get at least a little comfortable around Copycat. But she had to, since Copy couldn't walk on his own yet.
The week passed and the question showed up. Video knew it would eventually come.
"Why did you save me?"
Video didn't know how to answer while not being honest.
"It felt like the right thing to do. You almost fell on me so I wasn't fine after seeing you on the ground, too"
Copy, for the first time since waking up, showed a real and honest expression. It looked like mix of quilt and fear.
"I... didn't know that could happen. I didn't think about it.. " He said silently, almost whispering.
"Why you wanted to end this like that? I don't know what happened in your life but-"
"Exactly. You don't know. So don't try to say you know anything" He cut her and went silent again. Vid was ready for that answer. It wasn't first time someone snapped at her like that.
Later that day she spoke to him again.
"I was a therapist, you know?" She said while giving him food. He looked at her with surprised smile.
"Pff, YOU? How when you look like needing one yourself??" He laughed a little. Vid just smiled politely.
"I did say I was, not that I still am" She looked away, kinda dozing off. Copy stopped laughing and got curious instead.
"What happened then?"
"It's too long of an answer. It doesn't matter anyway.. Not anymore" She answered. Her eyes looked empty while she cleaned the dishes.
It took a really long time to make Copy speak up. But Video wasn't pushy. She gave him time and was giving gentle treatment while sharing some information about herself to gain his trust. Eventually Copycat said what caused him to break.
He murdered someone. He admitted it wasn't a problem that he did it, it wasn't first time. But it was the first time killing someone possibly innocent. And he did it wrong. His victim died in pain and it took a long time before she stopped breathing. It was an order and he was starwing, he couldn't decline. But he couldn't take the last look she gave him. It was haunting, begging look of someone desperate to live.
After long days of insomnia and quilt he just wanted to rest. He broke down into a sobby mess, shaking and apologising over and over. Vid let him cry himself out.
After a few weeks Copycat started slowly getting better. But he still didn't know how to start anew.
"Why you want me to live so much?" He was asking from time to time. Vid couldn't answer how she wanted to and went with some therapy lines. It wasn't working well, but it was better than not saying anything. She couldn't tell him the truth just yet.
Copy eventually started leaving her place, going to store all by himself and resocializing. He looked and felt better and better every new day. But Video started feeling weaker and more dim.
One day, Video asked Copycat over. She asked if she can look into his memories. At first Copy didn't understand, She explained that it's how her ability works. She can take an USB wire from her wrist and plug herself to another Addison and learn about everythng what happened in it's life while her patient goes into a sleeping state.
"It's like watching a movie, but with feeling what you did at the moment" She said. After long thinking, Copy agreed but warned her she might hate him afterwards. She assured him that she would never. Copy lay down on the bed and let Vid do the thing.
When he woke up, he noticed Vid, sitting on the bed, facing away from him.
"How was it?" He asked, not sure what to expect
". . ."
"Video?"
"I... need to go outside" She stuttered and stormed out while covering her face. Copy felt fear, thinking she doesn't want to know him anymore.
He failed to see she was crying.
She came back in the morning, reassuring Copy that she wasn't abandoning him. But she admitted that he can't stay with her forever. So a few days later, he left.
He was coming over to her often. To talk, to share, to hang out. But she was becoming weaker and weaker each time. Even faster since he left. He noticed it and asked her what's wrong, but she didn;t want to tell him. So he just continued to visit her as often as he could.
One day, after being gone for a bit longer, he showed up with a bouquet in his hands and knocked on the door. He wanted to thank her yet again and share some news. But she didn't answer. He knocked again. Still nothing. Growing worried, he tried to open the lock on the door. Turns out the door was open, so he let himself in. She was sitting next to the bed, loosely. Almost falling over. She wasn't breathing. It was the first time he has seen her in a regular shirt. That's when Copycat realised why she was always covering her body with long sleeved hoodies, turtlenecks, gloves and scarves. At first he thought she was cutting herself. But that was worse.
On her fingertips and on her neck were dark, awful marks. They looked like a weird virus you would see only in a horror movies.
She was being eaten alive by a disease, like a human cancer. For possibly years. Knowing there was no cure. He now knew why she saved him. It was so selfish, but it got to him more than any of her other advises.
She wanted HIM to live because SHE was the one who didn't want to die. She wanted her last patient to live on, for her.
That day, Copycat cried more than he did ever before and after in his life. And never tried to take his own life again.
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boyslit · 2 months ago
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sometimes i feel bad about everything i've put Essara through but i have also written 'good' timelines for her. like a taproot, every choice creates a new vein of plot.
but the one that lines her up to be every single tes hero (for the games ive played anyway) 🔽
the vestige reclaims her soul from Molag Bal
through some fuckery is slain and sealed away in a soul stone (I'll be honest here I played a fair bit of ESO a long time ago but for some reason the fuckery in zenimax's account management has prevented me from logging in or even downloading the game so i said fuck u and stopped trying lmfao)
soul stone lays in the hands of a powerful necromancer eventually slain and their stash looted
soul stone ends up in the personal collection of the Imperial City's archmage
passed down to subsequent archmages, and eventually given as an ostentatious gift to one of the Septim princes, Enman
Enman is fooling around with one of the palace clerks, plying her with declarations of love, cheap gifts, anything to draw her to bed with him
a sudden bout of handsiness pushes her into a cabinet and dislodges his precious gifted soulstone. once it clatters to the floor, he can see the light has gone out in it. it's ruined, empty. he's furious
Elatherin is fired from palace work at the prince's decree, and blacklisted from basically any other clerical work. she and her 4 year old daughter move to the the waterfront, unable to afford anywhere else
Essara is born a few months later, and in afew years orphaned with her sister, who join a band of street children who thieve and beg to survive and share their resources
after her sister is arrested, they move to the sewers for safety, have a few fallings out, and the leader tosses her out to make her own way. starving and alone she pickpockets ever-vigilant watch captain Lex and gets arrested
stops speaking after traumatic event and is released to the healer's care. Khajiit looks after her for a long while as Essie recovers, until she's poisoned by an unknown assailant. Essara can't cure her and is unable to keep the alchemical business going afterwards.
Essara is jailed due to some legal snafu with the business and Jo'qorra's death, ends up in the 'secret' jail cell the Emperor and blades are trying to escape to, and thus is she snared by fate to become the Champion of Cyrodiil
manages to rescue a mage from Vaermina's clutches which he had gotten there through his own idiocy
builds up the dark brotherhood, saves it from another infiltration attempt and then retires. just wants a quiet life
settles in Anvil, marries, has a couple children. things are nice for a while! they go visit her friend in the mountains who's a powerful mage and has offered to train her son in use of magic
she's also the granddaughter of Vaermina, and Vaermina is still pissed about losing one of her cattle. she's ordered to bring Essara before the prince, and Vaermina curses her to a sleep of unspecified length
anguished, the granddaughter and Essara's family store her sleeping body in a mausoleum guarded by atronachs to keep her safe. there's no telling when she'll awaken.
she doesn't awaken until it's time to get arrested at the skyrim border for the TESV: Skyrim plot :D
of course she doesn't know 200 years have passed and is pissed that they're arresting the champion of the oblivion crisis, the emperor will hear about this! they're like. did u bump ur head lady
and then the dragon roast happens and shes like well im not gonna die here so she skedaddles and despite her best efforts still ends up obligated to save skyrim from dragons bc somehow she has dragon blood. who knew? not her!
she's annoyed to the max about all this bc all she fucking wanted was to live a quiet life after all that oblivion shit with her family but no! but maybe she can build some kind of life here in skyrim. there's so many war orphans who need nurtured, and she picks up a couple that pluck at her heart
this is also the timeline where instead of just infiltrating Elenwen's party she seduces her to get at the info. for fun and for ghey shit u know
maybe i should post that one, its very poignant
but anyway. looking forward to TESVI whenever they deign to work on it and finish it so i can put my evil little fingers into the strings of fate and pull them to call on our Heroine once more >:}
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worriedvision · 3 years ago
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So I'm cropping out the rest of the ask BC I wouldn't be comfortable with writing it, however I have an idea for this! Gender neutral reader. A bit of violence is mentioned, but there is no blood or gore.
“Are you being serious? Another mission? When did we last have a proper date, Ajax?” You go off on him, hearing about his explanation as to why he had been a no show for yet another date. The two of you had been working hard, but the difference between yourself and your boyfriend was the fact that you at least had enough time in the day, or on your day off, to work on hobbies. Ajax, however, had been dedicated to the Fatui, for a reason that you didn’t fully understand. Sure, he really liked a good fight, but surely he had other aspects to his person? After all, why else would he be interested in someone like you, a mere shop worker who put in more effort than anyone else? The way you both got together started when you managed to settle debt problems, and your way of standing up for yourself was refreshing for Tartaglia. 
“Oh, not this again...” Tartaglia groans out, running a hand down his face before gritting his teeth together. “We’ve had this discussion many times, _. How many times do I have to remind you that you’re not the main priority in my life? Work comes first.” He roars out at the end, prompting some people outside to look over in concern. 
“Work isn’t the only aspect to life, Ajax!” You retort, arms flailing at the frustration of your boyfriends unnatural dedication to work. “You’re going to burn out if you-”
“I’m not you, you know?” Ajax crosses his arms, closing his eyes to attempt to ground himself. “You know, sometimes I wished I took up the chance to date-”
“Oh, and now you’re bringing up that fatui agent who was making lots of flirty comments to you the one time we managed to go on a date recently? I wouldn’t even call that a date, considering they whisked you away for work!” You sigh out, nails digging into your palms as you’re beginning to get paranoid about what the fatui agent may or may not have done to him.
“Well I actually have something in common with them, _! We don’t have anything to bond over, seriously. Sometimes I want to take you on a mission with me, but I know you’d be unable to hold your ground.” Tartaglia explains, getting more soft as he’s realising that this might be the end of the relationship. If he wasn’t careful with his words, you’d be gone forever.
“...Have you been planning my death, Ajax? Is that why you started dating me after I settled those debts?”  You blankly ask, finding it unsettling how long it took Ajax to even look at you after contemplating something.  When he still doesn’t say a word, you leave, not another word escaping you. 
--
A few days pass after that argument, and you know deep down that the relationship would have never worked out with him. Really, he would have been more attracted to a fatui agent who knew how to stand for themselves not only mentally, but physically. 
Which is why you’re hating the idea of transporting these goods to a neighbouring nation. Taking a deep breath, you can only hope your god is watching over you, making sure of your safety. Unfortunately, treasure hoarders see your cart of goods, and they ambush you. Initially, they were hesitant to move in - they knew you as someone who had connections to the Fatui. However, after they see how utterly defeated you looked, they assumed these connections were long gone. 
So, they go in. 
You didn’t stand a chance, even despite the fact none of the treasure hoarders were using their weapons. They kick you to the ground, and they rob you off everything on your person, another set of treasure hoarders dragging the cart away to their base and laughing at your pathetic attempts to block the kicks as you’re crumpled on the ground. In a moment of what you could only assume to be stupidity, you revert to attacking, weakly swinging at the treasure hoarders. Your weak spots now exposed to them. After a few more attacks, you pass out. 
The last thing you hear is a frantic set of footsteps, eyes closing as you can only hear the muffled slashes as you enter a deep sleep.
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elius-learns-to-write · 3 years ago
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hi! omg i luv ur blog 💘 can i request/suggest (kinda angsty but then fluffy) where r has trouble sleeping and a lot of nightmares/anxiety & mother!nat is there to comfort her? 🥺 like the whole team is super understanding and comforting but especially nat (bc we love mom nat around here!) anyways thanks so much ily bestie!
Hey Bestie! thank you so much for being patient and for supporting my blog! I know this has been in my inbox for so long but still! here it is. Sending my love to you <3 i have just realised that there is not a lot of comfort in here oops.
warning: this does include details of death and blood so keep that in mind if you read this <3
It’s Okay
You had always gotten nervous in public spaces 
Or at night when you couldn’t sleep
Or when you didn’t know all of the details of a plan 
Or when it was 3am and you were too scared to sleep
The point is you always seemed to have 100 thoughts plaguing your mind 
“Y/n sweetie I’m gonna need you to concentrate on my voice okay?” Wanda's voice waded through the watery noise in your head. You knew she was right and that logically there was no reason to be so upset, but you just couldn’t help it. It had all started after the group had decided to not tell you about the meal they had planned at this fancy restaurant that Tony wanted to try and of course this had sent you into a spiral and you were now very very aware of every possible outcome. “Come on kid, you’re alright, breathe slowly” Tony tried, or was it Steve maybe it was Bruce. When you got like this, voices sounded the same and nothing felt real. You couldn’t breathe and that was your main worry.
The team had gotten used to it and always reassured you that it was okay 
They didn’t mind and would always be there
And no matter how much you appreciated all of the support there was 1 person the team always knew to call
Natasha
Crash, thud, bang. The noise coming from outside the room had woken you from the sleep you had allowed your brain to indulge in for once. Whenever you did this though your mind would be over run with the horrors of life and death. 
Peeling the covers off of you, you slowly crept from out of the bed. Where was the rest of the team? Had they woken up? You hadn’t heard anyone else get up but in your hazy state of mind shrugged it off as them just being deep sleepers. Something you would later regret telling yourself. 
As your hand pulled the handle of your room down to open it you heard another noise. Laughter? Hesitating you looked around in the hope of finding a clock but as your eyes frantically moved in an effort of finding one the floor seemed to start to sway beneath your feet. Soon the darkness engulfed you.
For the second time that night your body jolted forward and you gasped for air, the dryness of your mouth hitting you like a punch to the gut. When was the last time you had a drink? Where did the laughter go? Why had you passed out? So many questions and yet it felt like you were trapped in an endless game of hide and go run with a twist, you didn’t know who you were running from and how much time you had before they found you. 
Before you could even begin to think logically again the loud twang of metal hitting the ground sounded from down the hall. Slowly stepping outside the room you had woken up in which you had realised wasn’t your own, you guessed you had been in Steve’s bedroom which was odd given that he wasn’t in there. Maybe he was out helping Bucky with his nightmares? 
Bare feet slapping against the cold marble floor of the tower you tried to navigate your way through the dark to wherever the team had gone. The sounds of machines whirring stopped you, the lights must be getting turned on. Sure enough, bright white light blinded you, spreading through the faster Pietro could run. Blinking away the pain and blind spots from your eyes you were met with big red letters painted on the floor.
 ‘The crowds will come and flood your world, yet you will remain empty and incomplete’ the red bleeding off into a winding path that would probably lead to whoever had wormed their way here. Even with this in mind the words seemed to swim through your mind; you had always felt empty even when your life was full but you never told anyone but Natasha and she would never tell anyone your secrets she had promised. She wasn’t like that. Repeating that phrase like a prayer that would save you, you followed the red wet paint. 
Red can signify many things: energy, passion, lust and the one you should have paid more attention to. Danger. 
Instead of being faced with some psycho who broke in all you were greeted with was the horrifying image of your family dead on the floor. Blood trickled out of anything it could noses, ears, mouths. Eyes open with a stare of pure terror. A scream tore its way though your throat. The familiar metallic substance flooding your senses. 
Knees crashing to the ground as you sobbed and sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. Because when you have nothing, when all you have is gone, what can you do but cry yourself a river and let your soul float away on the memories of simpler times? 
You knew your knees would bruise from the mpact but you didn’t care. You didn’t deserve to go through this painlessly after what they had gone through in their last moments. 
A creak made itself heard above the sound of your cries, head slowly lifting to see what it was, damaging your throat further when you saw the lifeless bodies of the avengers sitting up and staring back at you. Salty tears streaming even quicker as you tried to scramble away. Slipping on nothing. Suddenly the lights shut off again. You didn’t move. You didn’t scream. You didn’t even breathe. 
“Wake up y/n”. What?
It had been Nat that woke you up from the nightmare
Even though the whole team had been aware of what was happening all they could do was watch in horror as your body writhed in fear
After making your way to Nat’s room where you knew you would spend the night
Unable to brave it alone
You finally found it in yourself to talk
“You were all dead” you croaked from the cocoon of blankets the redhead had wrapped you in. sitting down next to you and wrapping her arms around your body, you found yourself desperate for the comfort of her hugs. “We don’t have to talk about it right now, just know that I will never ever abandon you. How could I leave my little sunflower to fend for themselves? You give me a reason to be better and I will never leave you. Nor will anyone on this team for that matter” she spoke softly, as if cooing a terrified animal out of their hiding spot. You had and always will have a family as long as you have Natasha. She would make sure of it. And soon you drifted off into a peaceful slumber to the sound of her sweet hums. “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray, you’ll never know dear, how much I love you. So please don’t take my sunshine away”.
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theconfusedartist · 1 year ago
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I was given questions!!!! I SHALL ANSWER
Ok so @zero-saito the twins I mentioned were after Desmond and Alex officially became a couple (to Desmond, to Alex it was affirmation that Desmond was his fiancée), Desmond got pregnant with the twins soon after his 25th birthday.
Elijah and Alex already knew each other, Dana was his surrogate aunt, and things were actually calming down for Desmond bc Alex enjoyed killing any Abstergo agents that came after him and Desmond (the last time Gentek was making moves on their surveillance on Alex, Desmond hunted them all down to the last two men--the commander and a grunt. And warned them that if either of them were to just be "following orders," he would kill them quickly and painfully) made sure that any Gentek or BlackWatch goons that came after him were dealt with. Stealthily. And they would only know what happened when he would deliver their heads on their doorstep without getting caught.
Desmond was originally planning on buying the motorcycle piece by piece and then building it from the ground up (which he did bc he didn't want to be in a car sales database) but still needed his license, so Alex helped him forge one in the Gentek labs.
Alex put his name down as "Destiny Mercer" (he would've put Desiree, but that's Desmond's middle name, and they thought it was too risky) and then labeled him as one of his next of kin. Desmond didn't agree to that, but Alex was like, "He can't divorce me if he doesn't have the certificate!". Desmond was just really happy to be able to drive, so Alex got away with that and introduced Desmond as his husband whenever he got the chance, and when Desmond protests, he's like, "FINE! We're actually fiancées."
Desmond doesn't protest that, so Alex just flaunts that.
As for Abstergo, they don't know that Desmond is a PoE, but they do know that he's important bc multiple PoE have mentioned him. The most telling part for them is when they found Altaïr's library in Masyaf, Altaïr was still alive just in hibernation mode, and when Daniel panicked and shot at the apple causing it to self-destruct while Altaïr was still holding onto it--he called out for Desmond.
Due to Altaïr being in a state of death and the apple body destroyed, Desmond also entered a state of death as well, before his memories were rebooted along with Altaïr's. However, all memories of Altaïr's life after 1190 were corrupted, and he was unable to process them.
Desmond, who was at the time only like 14, ended up passing out with the bullet marks on his body and falling down a ravine as it had been during his training. Ezio saw the entire thing play out, and later on, so did Aveline and Connor.
Wait, back to the twins, so Desmond was pregnant with them when the outbreak started, and despite this still was doing assassin activities and doing his best to support Alex--especially during the time Alex was infected with the parasite.
I guess I should also explain about Elijah, too? Desmond wad pregnant with triplets (whom Juno, Aita, and Minerva planned to possess later on down the line, they quite literally manipulated his body for this purpose) only for hin to get into an accident while hitchhiking and had a really early birth on the side of the road, with only Altaïr able to support him. Desmond calls Elijah his "little miracle" and spoils him rotten. Altaïr is the proud (and incredibly concerned?? Like holy shit Desmond that was a LOT to go through) second Dad and older brother to Elijah, who keeps Desmond on track as a parent.
Abstergo knows about Elijah but considers him unimportant as Desmond had taken Elijah to a clinic when he was (around 4-5ish) and they took a DNA test, only for it to claim that Desmond wasn't even biologically related to him. This is due to Desmond being a PoE and the fact that Elijah is a chimera. (Also, I know this article says the other baby has to die early, but Elijah had been born at like close to 5 months and Desmond's PoE body helped this process along as the other two children had already perished and Elijah was very weak from the accident)
Alex, while virused up, infected Desmond with Blacklight as well as the womb. It was ABSOLUTELY a breach of trust, but it ended up being beneficial as Desmond was in critical condition after being injured by the Leader Hunter that kidnapped Dana (bro was trying so hard to help but it just did not end well). Abstergo doesn't know that Desmond is a PoE when they kidnap him, but eventually Lucy finds out and marks it in her notes.
And I guesstimate this being off topic but! I love Lucy, I really thought she was a badass. She's a triple agent. She lost faith in the Assassin order after Bill all bust abandoned her to work as a mole, but she hated the Templars for their methods especially after seeing what happened to Subject 14, 15, and 16. Lucy did try to get Clay out of Abstergo, but Bill was willing to let Clay die if it meant he could mine as much information out of him as possible. Lucy did her best to play the Templars and convince them that Clay should be released as a sleeper agent (as Daniel had) and that he would be able to lead them to their next subject: Desmond Miles.
However, Clay manages to overhear this and believes that Lucy has betrayed him. Feeling cornered, Clay turns to drastic measures and tries to escape on his own, only to find out that the windows are false and they're just giant pictures posted onto brick walls. The subject room is deep underground, and although Clay was able to find a way out through the bathroom, only to realize this was a trap as well.
Panicking and hysterical, Clay begins to cut into his arms and legs to draw all the symbols, and Warren just watches it all go down. Eventually, Lucy sees what's going on in the cameras and tries to stop the bleeding, but he's too far gone, so he puts Clay back into the animus in an attempt to preserve him digitally. This works, but Clay encrypts his files into the framework of the animus and enters a state of hibernation until Desmond comes along, where his code is unable to be accessed.
Lucy, by the time Desmond is brought along, is fed up with the Templars and the assassins. She wants out, but she knows that she needs a trump card in case anyone tries to come after her, which is why she decides to get Desmond on her side. The Mentor's son or no, she already knows that no one is coming for them. The sixth day when Vidic plays the 'assassins' coming for Desmond is all a ruse to get his hopes up and break his spirits.
It doesn't work simply because Desmond knows his father, too. No one is coming for them.
I hope I answered the questions well enough!!! I loved getting the questions too, ask me anything you want to know I'll answer!
anyways this is tumblr and I actually do live in the wild west of America. I WILL talk about my protocreed au
So, to start off, Alex sees Desmond and Elijah while he's grabbing something at the university of New York in Manhattan, and actually catches a glimpse of Desmond eating a glass plate and a metal cup. He's so fucking confused and fascinated that he starts stalking him out of a scientific desire to study him.
Why is Desmond eating glass and metal you may ask? He is a piece of eden and his body needs nutrients in order to sustain itself. More specifically, he's three apples. Altaïr's apple was his 'body' which is why he looks so much like him, Ezio's apple was the 'voice' that allows him to properly speak to people through time, Connor and Aveline had the 'brain' apple which allows them to directly configure and control his abilities and memory.
Yes, Aveline and Connor get married in this AU. It should've happened in canon, and just bc ubi decided to drop their storyline, it doesn't mean I have to.
So, back on track, Elijah and Desmond are traveling together bc Desmond was absolutely ecstatic to learn he was having a child, and they decided to go to Manhattan after the 'Daniel incident' in Vermont. Alex manages to track Desmond down after two months working at Bad Weather and decides to just. Watch him.
And also get into a shit ton of bar fights, bc you can't tell me that Alex wasn't using his fighting moves in game before everything happened, you can't.
Most of the other employees that work at Bad Weather don't want to deal with Alex because, as previously stated he gets into a lot a bar fights and actually manages to win them, and Desmond is a good enough fighter that he can handle him. The interesting part is that Alex never tries to involve Desmond in his fights but he does let him pull him off people without attacking, like he would attack other bartenders, so they just let Desmond handle him.
Desmond is...conflicted on Alex bc on one hand, the man is stalking him and is persistent about it too, but also doesn't run away screaming when he realizes that Alex has seen him eating food that shouldn't be consumable by humans and will break a bunch of shit so people don't realize why so many dishes go missing in a week. But on the other hand, Alex is quite open about wanting to pin him to a lab table and seeing what makes him tick, which is fucking creepy. But he also??? Fights off any Abstergo agents when they're watching him in the bar (and later on he discreetly kills them) so its a really fucking mixed bag for Desmond.
This is kinda long. I'll stop here, but like I wanted there to be a reason Alex is so interested in Desmond before and after his death and rebirth, and I kinda wanted to lean into the fact that Dr. Mercer was absolutely a freak.
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wygolvillage · 3 years ago
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unlike what seems like a lot of people (since i see this in fanfiction sort of frequently when i have the whim to read) i dont think theres one set “belmont estate” where the family lived, i actually think their place of residence and mode of living changed over the generations
pre-sonia: before they were vampire hunters they were just regular hunters and sort of well-off. in a pretty secluded mountain village, sonia’s grandfather owned a mansion (iirc this was mentioned in the Manual Backstory(tm)) filled with the family’s hunting trophies mounted on the walls. large, cozy, and cabin-esque. this mansion was destroyed in a monster raid on the village shortly before sonia lead her charge on the castle.
trevor era: sonia briefly settled in a smaller village following her victory, to raise her son (not alucard’s in my hcs though bc i dont like it. they were just friends). during trevor’s childhood, he and his mother were required to leave the country since sonia had Abilities (vaguely described as “being able to detect supernatural monsters” so i always hc she had prophetic visions) that those in power saw as threatening and unnatural. knowing what happened to alucards mother, sonia feared being accused as a witch, so she acquiesced. their living conditions while in exile were less consistent but not outright terrible. following the exile sonia secluded herself and her son a lot more, preferring to stay away from prying eyes.
christopher era: since trevor took after his mothers sensibilities, the belmont family stuck with small, woodsy cabins a large-ish distance from nearby settlements, even when invited back into the country. though trevor earned back some respect for the belmont family, they were still feared by many. christopher followed suit, living in a little house in the mountains with his wife and son, soleiyu, though he wasnt as isolated as trevor was later in life.
simon era, juste era, richter era (pre-sotn): simon was at first mostly the same as his predecessors, but following his near-death in cv2 he gained a new outlook on life and feared to waste it in solemn solitude. he moved to one of the villages that had welcomed him during his quest, aljiba, as his victories had gained more respect for the bloodline he felt more assured doing so compared to his ancestors and their rightful caution. through the next few generations, the belmonts stayed there, this being the village where juste, maxim and lydie grew up and where richter and annette lived, too. despite their legendary status, they lead frugal lives, even though they probably could have afforded a mansion. i also think that juste and richter both spent large portions of their childhood being sent to a slightly further away church-based... academy? thing? to ensure their skills were ship shape.
richter era (post-sotn): after losing his connection to the whip in the aftermath of his possession, he entrusted it to alucard to find a new heir, who was in the area while maria was trying to domesticate him (lol)- alucard would eventually pass it on to the morrises, of course, after having crafted the alucard spear to compliment its power. richter, on the other hand... his role was over. he and annette (srry im not an annette divorce truther i think its more interesting if they stay together and the various ways that dracula tried to tempt them to evil and how annette could resist it but richter couldnt and- thats an essay for another day) just kind of left, with richter unable to face the land he had grown up in steeped in legend and legacy. they traveled aimlessly until they happened upon an idyllic valley between two difficult to cross mountain ranges, nearby the sea, and lived there while richter found the peace his turmoiled heart so needed. this is the place that would eventually become wygol, where ooe took place
ooe era: i think following richter moving to that valley, so did other belmont descendants, seeking comfortable obscurity and a hiding place after their bloodline had fallen to ruin. the once scattered family tree mostly ended up reuniting around this area and populating the area, creating a lot of the human structures like the monastery and the church in oblivion ridge (the description for that area also said its the abandoned site of harvest festivals, and i hc that thats why). around this time, nikolai established wygol as an official town. it was unknown to him that this was where the belmonts were in hiding, but barlowe also chose this place as the site for eccesia’s main headquarters due to the distance from others so he could secretly perform his experiments without being questioned by locals, since the existing belmont population was pretty scarce even in the area’s golden years as that hiding place. as dracula grew closer to resurrection, though, monsters began flooding the area, a sign of his return, and most of the belmonts left once more, leaving wygol (and ecclesia) as one of the last places still actively inhabited in the remote valley. the belmonts that left mostly just incorporated themselves into “normal society”, abandoning their old names and family history.
and it mostly stays the same from there since thats where the legacy kind of ends... though i think julius was born in america and wygol would be abandoned by modern day (its the lost village from dawn)
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