#a n y w a y
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(Star Wars: Crimson Reign #3 - The Archivist)
the concept of jedi as celebrities is so interesting to me, mostly because they're monks of an order whose philosophy is grounded on egoless service and humility. one jedi should be roughly the same as any other when sent on a mission, because the jedi serve the force. there may be slight differences in methodologies, yes, but fundamentally, they're not there to make a name for themselves as anything other than as representatives of the jedi order.
but of COURSE it makes sense that the galaxy would be obsessed with them. a mysterious group of wizards who use flashy swords and make peace through persuasive words and heroic deeds? of course people wrote books about them, watched shows about them, adults gossiped about them, and kids pretended to be them when playing. so the question of how all that knowledge was wiped away within a generation is a good one, and the comic presents a good answer:
(Star Wars: Crimson Reign #3 - The Archivist)
the earnest goodness of the jedi comes across to many as sanctimonious. they're too responsible with their power, too cool and restrained. they don't lash out with anger on behalf of those they love, you know? they don't smile enough, too serious. they're seen as the embodiment of "we have food at home" energy. the reality of the canonical order as gentle and joyful, surprisingly playful and open, isn't sexy enough to redeem their moral authority.
based on my inbox and the way people respond to some of my posts about the jedi, the resentment that this engenders in the population of the GFFA feels very real. there is actual HATRED directed toward this fictional group, irrational and out of all proportion. the comic suggests that people jump to hate those who make them feel guilty and self-conscious, because lashing out absolves yourself of confronting the reason you secretly know you'd be judged and found wanting, and that seems accurate.
i would insert a thousand examples here of the jedi not deserving this reputation, but the canon behavior of the jedi doesn't matter, the galaxy cheered as they died anyway and lots of fans love to hate on them. the mere concept of them and their philosophy is enough to alienate people, and i think that's a shame, but understandable. i'll love them enough to make up for it haha
#jedi order#i know i'm in too deep#but the jedi in canon are consistently less perfect and more human than they're given credit for#their goodness come from dedication and is not innate#they're funny and sexy and wonderful to me#i don't feel judged for being less moral than them. i feel inspired to be better#a n y w a y#sw#sw comics
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me: *shaking victor hugo by the collar* and that's why the BBC series is a disgrace, the musical is okay and takahiro arai's manga is the single greatest adaptation of les misérables. do you like the manga, victor- victor! DO YOU LIKE THE MANGA
victor hugo: *looking at wikipedia* what do you mean Notre Dame fcking burned down
#A N Y W A Y#victor hugo#les miserables#by the way I have Thoughts about notre dame but best not get into that
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bad toman timeline + text posts
#BEST TIMELINE#stuff i made while procrastinating on other stuff#a n y w a y#tokrev#tokyo revengers#bad toman timeline#takemichi hanagaki#kazutora hanemiya#chifuyu matsuno#kazufuyu#hanma shuji#tetta kisaki#haruki hayashida#ryohei hayashi#hajime kokonoi#seishu inui#hakkai shiba#yasuhiro muto#nahoya kawata#naoto tachibana#just setting the mood for whumptober. gonna make all these guys suffer :3c#i don't think a single one of them is happy in this timeline. hakkai is living a lie + mitsuya just disappeared + what happened to yuzuha#koko and inupi are just plain old criminals. that probably isn't gonna solve their issues#smiley either had to get his brother away from toman or accepted for him to stay and either option sucks#and wheres sanzu. is it okay for mucho not to keep an eye on him#also peh and pah got murdered right in that restaurant and we dont even know who did it. but no one stopped it#did mucho and smiley know this would happen? did they watch it happen but did nothing bc they didn't want to die too?#non-leaper takemichi staying in toman after hina's death bc what else is he gonna do#and then there's chifuyu :) i could fill notebooks about bad toman chifuyu angst tbh. and i will
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Self indulgent raven Virgil
#moon draws#sanders sides#virgil sanders#janus sanders#patton sanders#roman sanders#remus sanders#logan sanders#birdgil if you will#a n y w a y#spider virgil is cool#i just associate ravens with my own anxiety and thought this would be cool lol
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so here's my personal theory on how the mal shit is gonna go:
i think mal's been corrupted by shadow, and i think he either doesn't know about it or did it because he felt it was the only way to protect his friends. similar to how he sees money - the more power he has, the more able he is to guarantee that he'll never be in a vulnerable situation (losing those he loves and being unable to do anything) again
either way i think the corruption is more manipulating him than anything. from the way tyril talked this chapter, it sounds like mal has been making a habit of making harsh, risky decisions. we've even kind of seen this when he jumped in front of Valax' glaive. when i saw that i assumed that it was your main LI who does this, but no, it's always mal. i think this is, in part, supposed to show that mal is acting way more reckless than he usually would
the other part is that, obviously, the real reason the shadow didn't hurt him was that he was already shadow corrupted anyway
im not entirely sure what the endgame is yet, but i think that it's the watcher who's responsible for the corruption. i simply don't trust a man who makes his first appearance in Certified Choices Evil Robes, and besides, today's lore tablet pretty much proved that he's taking us in the wrong direction
aerin is going to play a pivotal role in helping mal get rid of the corruption. he's the one person in the world who knows the most about it, and, from his comments about shadow corruption being more complicated than you think, possibly the only one who believes saving mal is possible anyway. also, i mean, he did go through that process
the process to save mal will likely be extremely painful, if aerin's unwillingness to talk about it is any indication
our relationship with aerin will likely influence the outcome, since he will be the key to helping mal. especially since mal has probably been his #1 hater, the main reason aerin would have to care about mal is his attachment to mc. if you don't have a good enough relationship with aerin, maybe the outcome will be different
it will be through this process that we will learn that The Watcher Is Evil, Actually and possibly foil his plans?
it will be so fucking angsty it's unreal and we'll be fed everything we didn't get in the reunion and more, THIS IS HOW MALMANCERS CAN STILL WIN
the haircut is here to stay 😔
#accidentally posted this on the wrong blog so here it is again#playchoices#blades of light and shadow#bolas#bolas2 spoilers#bolas 2#mal volari#mal x mc#meta#maybe i should create a fag for speculation or some shit#A TAG. A TAG. I MEANT A TAG. FUCK#A N Y W A Y#choices book club#i can reclaim the f word don't cancel me
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Soooo I just started Love is Like a Poison, and it's been a minute since I so misunderstood what a show was going to be.
What I got right: Ryoma is a brilliant lawyer and Haruta is a crook who pushes himself into Ryoma's life.
What I really got wrong: "100th partner" means professional partner, and Ryoma is NOT a lawyer with a very busy sex life who never fell in love with a ~ partner ~
#Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru#look don't ask me why that's what I got from the gifs I saw#i guess the 'be your 100th partner and your 1st lover' got wildly misinterpreted by my brain#and it just stuck anyway#in my defense i did not actually *read* anything about it before starting it#(i am having a great time so far tho)#a n y w a y
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I know we universally dislike how Danganronpa handled Chihiro and "he dresses like a girl because it makes him feel comfortable and less anxious but also he wants to become stronger so that he can shed his anxious feminine self and be a real man" but.
I had less of a problem than maybe I should have.
Because.
That's Ritsu's storyline in Fruits Basket (albeit with less murder). Ritsu dresses as a woman - full Hiyoko style get-up - because it makes him less anxious, because it calms him. His idea is that when he becomes more confident and sure of himself (and feels less like his existence is a blight on the entire world for which he must apologize (hi Mikan)), he will dress in suits and be more manly. In fact, the main character, Tohru, believes he is a woman until it's revealed otherwise, and this is seen as a deep point of shame.
However.
Fruits Basket also gives us Ayame Sohma, who overflows with the most confidence of anyone in the entire series, and who also. is a fashionista. Also occasionally wears women's clothing (a wedding dress, at one point, because his clothing store is to fulfill men's fantasies, and one of them is apparently wearing a wedding dress and getting married). Does not see a problem with stylizing his little brother's clothes as more feminine or putting him in a dress (despite said little brother very much not liking being mistaken for a woman or having people mention how feminine he looks).
Like.
Ayame aggressively does not care about your gender roles ever at any point in time.
And Fruits Basket tells us that this is the person Ritsu wants to emulate.
So like.
I should have a problem with how Danganronpa handled Chihiro.
But I'm also starting to wonder how common a plot point/trope this sort of thing is in Japanese media.
#musings#danganronpa#chihiro fujisaki#fruits basket#ritsu sohma#ayame sohma#...to be fair ayame gives me some healthy junko vibes#if junko wasn't so aggressively akito in terms of how her actions impact the story#but absolutely ayame's shop is the sort of shop an adult junko would run#a n y w a y
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to celebrate hitting 50k i'm sharing a snippet of the longfic i'm currently working on <3 (thank you v much to both @deepwithintheabyss and @paprikadotmp4 for the encouragement & brainstorming help <3)
still untitled (i've been calling it the "aob dubcon fic" lmao) but i have written a summary:
Jason tries to sell off his first heat to make ends meet for the upcoming winter. When he’s taken by traffickers instead, he’s sure that’s the end of him—until he’s rescued by a mysterious alpha. That “rescue” comes with a price: Jason’s heat hits shortly after, and… one thing leads to another, and now Jason and Tim are bound together by a fledgling mate bond. It’s not the first time Jason’s had to make the best of things, but… he finds it a little bit easier this time, especially as he grows to genuinely like Tim. Unfortunately, just as they're starting to settle into mated life, Tim’s ex-pack starts getting involved, and they don’t exactly approve of Tim’s choice in mate—never mind that it wasn’t really a choice at all.
cws/tags for this snippet: reverse robins, aob dynamics, underage jason (15), first aid, medical inaccuracies (probably; i'm not a doctor, so i'm warning to be safe), hurt/comfort, touch starvation, anxiety, allusions to captivity related ptsd, self-deprecation, brief memories of non-consensual touching
editing to add: this snippet takes place in the 2nd half of chapter 2 <3 (& was originally the second scene for the fic lol)
i have also previously shared a snippet of the scene after this, when jason's heat hits, here.
Tim parks outside of an old apartment building. The brick facade is worn, cracked and peeling in places. Most of the windows are intact at least, though; two of them have lights on, the rest dark.
Tim gets out first, already having rounded the car by the time Jason is swinging his legs out. His hand rests on the door, waiting patiently for Jason to join him on the sidewalk. Then he shuts it. One hand rests on Jason’s back again, a gentle guide inside.
There’s a man at the desk near the front entrance, reading a newspaper. He spares them a brief, bored glance before going back to it.
There’s an out of order sign on the elevator, so they have to take the stairs. It’s just two flights, but by the end, Jason’s slightly out of breath. He’d thought he was in pretty good shape, but—
He guesses spending nearly a week in a small, windowless room hasn’t done him any favors.
Tim stops at a door in the middle of the hall, unlocking it and letting Jason go in first. The main room is all one room; living room transitioning to kitchen, separated by an island counter. Tim guides Jason to the couch, directing him to sit while he gets the first aid kit.
The couch is worn but comfortable, cushions sinking under Jason’s weight, cradling him.
Tim disappears down the hall, and returns a few moments later holding the biggest first aid kit Jason has ever seen. Not that he’s really an expert on the things, but— The one at his house was pretty small.
And mostly empty, honestly.
The coffee table looks comically small under it. It makes Jason’s belly flip with nerves, remembering the feeling of latex covered hands on his body, spreading him open.
He bites his lip.
Tim doesn’t open it, though; instead, he slips into the kitchen. He comes back a moment later, holding a bottle of purple Gatorade. Then, he kneels in front of Jason. It’s—odd. Having an alpha kneel in front of him, voluntarily. Even though Jason knows he doesn’t exactly have any power here, the visual dissonance is—
Odd.
He offers up the bottle. It takes a moment for Jason’s hands to move, but he does take it. His fingers fumble with the cap; he flushed, embarrassed despite himself, but gets it open.
As soon as it touches his lips, his thirst hits him full force. He allows himself two large gulps to wet his throat, and then forces himself to slow down, sipping instead.
When he screws the cap back on, he finds Tim still there. Waiting. He twists his hands around the plastic nervously.
“Alright,” Tim says gently. “Other than the bruise on your side, and the rope burns… are you injured?”
Jason shakes his head, twisting the sleeves of the alpha’s jacket. “Nn-nn. Just some bruises,” he says softly. He pauses. “And, um. I did hit my head once. It still hurts, but— I’m not, like, dizzy or nothin��.”
Tim nods. “Alright,” he says. “I’d like to do a head injury evaluation anyway. I’ll just feel over your skull, and then use a penlight to evaluate your pupil dilation. I’ve got cream for the rope burns, and for the bruise—” Tim hesitates a moment, then continues, “I’ll need to check and make sure nothing is cracked, and there’s no internal bruising.” He pauses again. “As long as there’s nothing serious anywhere else… I have some painkillers you can take, when we eat.”
Jason takes a moment to absorb all of that, and then nods, tipping his head forward obediently.
There’s a part of him screaming at himself not to be so compliant. To kick and claw and scratch and bite and fight, the way he has been for the past week. But he’s— He’s so tired, and sore, and—
The alpha smells so good, and— The smiles he keeps giving Jason melt something inside of him. He wants to keep seeing them. Keep earning them.
Tomorrow that might scare him.
Tonight—
His eyes fall closed when Tim’s fingers slide into his curls. The touch is achingly gentle. It feels— It feels good. Nice. Jason can’t help but lean into it. He thinks Tim’s hands linger a little longer than they need to, like he’s indulging Jason’s obvious enjoyment of the touch.
He does pull away eventually. Jason bites back his whine, instead sitting back up against the cushions.
“No bumps,” Tim murmurs. He gets out the penlight next, and cups Jason’s face as he shines a light first in one eye, and then the other. Jason grimaces, hissing a little as he squints. The light aggravates his aching head. “Pupil dilation is normal.” He pockets the light, and strokes Jason’s cheek with his thumb before he pulls away. “Now, I need to check your bruises.”
Jason bites his lip again. The constant worrying is starting to make the top layer of skin break and flake under his teeth. He averts his eyes, rolling the sleeves of the suit jacket up, exposing his hands. Then he pulls his shirt up, bunching it up just beneath his breasts.
His stomach jumps when Tim touches him. Tim pauses, hand hesitating, just barely touching Jason’s skin, and then— He starts to rumble, low and deep.
Jason whines. He doesn’t mean to—but it bursts from him; he can’t stop it, can’t muffle it. It’s a soft, helpless little keen, and the alpha’s rumble gets louder in response. He scoots closer, until he’s between Jason’s knees. His hand settles onto Jason’s skin, curving around his side. His other hand comes to cup Jason’s shoulder, thumb rubbing gentle circles through his clothes.
“It’s alright,” he soothes, the rumble deepening his voice. The sound—
Jason has only vague memories of his father rumbling for him, from when he was much, much smaller. Before working as a henchman had stolen much of his father’s good will. Other than that, Jason has only ever heard alphas rumble on TV. It’s—
It’s a really nice sound.
Against his will, tears fill his eyes, and he raises his hand, pressing his palm over one, like he can force them back inside. Tim’s hand settles against his side, just underneath the bruising. “You’re alright,” the alpha murmurs. “It’s okay to cry, pup.”
Jason sniffs, loud in the quiet. “I—I—”
“Shh, puppy.” Tim’s hand doesn’t leave Jason as he rises, slipping onto the couch beside him. His other hand cups the back of Jason’s head, tugging him forward—Jason’s arms come up automatically, wrapping around Tim’s neck, his shirt falling back over his abdomen. The alpha’s scent drips with comfort and the promise of protection and Jason—
He feels… He feels warm, and safe, and—
A sob rattles through his chest. Tim holds him closer, tighter, his arm winding around Jason’s waist. He buries his nose in Jason’s curls, stroking his skin with his thumb as he rocks him, slowly.
Jason’s chest heaves. His whole body shakes with each sob, so much that Jason is worried he’s going to shake himself apart. Tim’s steady hold feels like all that’s keeping him together.
It’s not just the last few days, it’s— It’s everything, since his Mom got sick and Dad turned to working as henchman and their lives just… fell apart. He’s— Jason’s been on his own for so long. Longer even than he’s been on the streets. Every day has been a fight for survival and Jason—
Honestly, he thought he’d finally lost.
Tim murmurs in his ear. Jason can’t hear a word of what he’s saying, but the tone is low and gentle, and Jason clings to it.
It takes a long time for Jason’s sobs to subside. Jason— He doesn’t know how long exactly. But he does know that when he’s done he feels exhausted. He slumps into Tim’s chest, tremors still running down his spine. His face is sticky. He definitely got snot all over Tim’s nice shirt, and that—
He’s too tired to even worry about Tim’s reaction.
Fingers comb through his hair again, lightly scritching his scalp. He lets out a soft sigh, slumping even more against the alpha’s chest.
Tim hums. He noses at Jason’s temple; a gentle nudge Jason grumbles at. “C’mon, pup,” he murmurs. “I still need to look at your bruises.”
Jason whines—the same plaintive little puppy whine he used to give his mom when he wasn’t ready to get up yet, for one reason or another. It makes Tim huff, amused; the humor reflected in his scent. It’s nice. Really nice.
He noses at Jason’s temple again. “Pup.” His voice is a little more stern. It’s not threatening, though—doesn’t even make Jason’s hackles raise. Tim is still rumbling. Close as they are, it feels like it’s seeping into Jason’s bones. It lessens the ache in him. His skin— His skin has been itchy for years, but. The creepy crawling of it has subsided, for now at least.
He’s comfortable. Jason doesn’t want to move.
He does anyway, sitting back with a scowl on his face. It makes Tim smile—his scowl deepens.
“I’ll be quick,” Tim promises.
Jason huffs a little. He leans back against the couch cushions. Tim’s hand is still under his shirt, sliding back over to the injured side as Jason lifts it. He feels— He feels more settled now. Less nervous, though butterflies still flutter between his ribs.
Jason watched Tim’s fingers probe gently around the bruising. The purple has started to fade to a greenish hue, but it still hurts when he prods it. Jason’s quiet, pained noises are soothed with soft rumbles and fingers rubbing his shoulders.
When he’s done, Tim’s hand lingers, laying casually on his waist. Jason’s skin would normally be prickling, but—
It isn’t.
It hasn’t this whole time, any time the alpha touched him.
“I don’t feel any cracks or breaks. Did— Were there any injuries to your back?” He’s no longer rumbling.
Jason misses it already. There’s a part of him that wants to snuggle up to him, see if he can’t coax that rumble back out.
He ignores it; instead shaking his head. “No. They— The, um, the boss said they were supposed to keep me as uninjured as possible. Any punishment had to be careful not to leave a mark.”
Tim hums. He strokes Jason’s skin with his thumb, and then slips his hand from Jason’s waist. It—
Jason finds that he misses it.
Tim leans forward, finally opening the first aid kit. It’s stocked, full of things Jason has names for and things he doesn’t. Tim takes out two things: the first, a small jar, and the second, a bottle of puppy’s Tylenol. Jason—he doesn’t like it, but he can’t really argue with it. Not at his size and weight and everything. They’re pills, at least, and chewable too,
Jason examines them carefully before he takes them, washing away the chalky flavor with the drink he’d been given before.
Tim unscrews the lid of the jar. The cream inside smells herbal, though not unpleasantly so. Jason holds out his arm, relaxing into the couch as the alpha works the cream into his skin.
It’s easy to let his eyes fall half-lidded. Jason is warm and sleepy. The air is thick with protective alpha scent; it soothes his hind-brain, the part that is purely omega, purely pup and longing for the comfort and safety of pack.
A small voice in the back of his mind is screaming, telling him he needs to keep his guard up.
It’s easy to ignore like this. To focus on nothing but gentle hands on his skin and the ambient noise around him; the hum of electricity and the distant noise of outside traffic.
Jason drifts.
He barely registers when the alpha switches arms, coming back up only to croon confusedly when Tim stops touching him. He blinks up at him, and gets a kind smile in return.
“Hush, pup,” the alpha soothes. “I’m going to get us something to eat.”
Jason blinks slowly at him and hums in acknowledgment. Tim gets a blanket from—somewhere, and lays it over him. It’s soft. Jason likes it. He nuzzles into it, into more of the alpha’s scent, and sighs.
He can hear Tim moving around in the kitchen—the clatter of dishware and pans, the bubbling of boiling liquid, the sound of his soft footsteps. He can smell something savory—chicken, he thinks, and garlic.
He drifts again, stirring only when Tim nudges him gently. A steaming bowl of soup is pressed into his hands.
“It’s hot,” Tim warns, a bit unnecessarily.
Jason still burns his tongue on the first mouthful. He doesn’t care. Having the food in front of him has made him realize how ravenous he is. His bowl is empty far too soon, though he’s too stuffed to go back for seconds.
His empty bowl is taken from him, and then Tim returns again. “C’mon, pup,” he murmurs. “I’ve got a spare toothbrush you can use. A spare den, too. I’ll get you some nesting materials and pajamas while you brush your teeth.”
Jason reluctantly leaves the couch and blanket behind, shuffling down the hall and into the bathroom. Tim procures a toothbrush for him, and then leaves.
It’s a relief to brush his teeth.
His captors had done it for him, so rough his gums had bled and ached. They still bleed under Jason’s gentle ministrations, but at least it doesn’t hurt. By the time he’s rinsing his mouth, Tim has returned, a bundle in his arms. He offers it to Jason.
“Clothes,” he says, a little unnecessarily.
Jason takes them, and Tim leaves again, giving him privacy. Jason goes to shut the door and then—
Hesitates.
He doesn’t want it open. But— He doesn’t…
What if he shuts it, and it won’t open again?
He’s. He’s being silly.
There’s no way this apartment has more than one bathroom. Trapping Jason inside here would be dumb, and he doesn’t think this alpha is dumb.
Jason takes a deep breath. He shuts the door.
Except—
He doesn’t. The latch hits the frame and Jason stops. His heart thunders in his ears. His breaths come sharper, quicker. He can’t. He can’t, he can’t, he can’t.
Tears burn in his eyes.
It’s not fair.
He rests his head against the frame; one hand cradling the bundle of clothes to his chest, the other gripping the doorknob.
God. He’s so fucking pathetic.
He shudders. Takes a deep breath. It shakes on his exhale, a tremor in his chest. It’s fine. He doesn’t have to shut it all the way. He can leave it like this, with the metal latch over the door frame, only the tiniest sliver of hallway visible.
It’s fine.
He’s fine.
Jason strips quickly, clothes falling into a puddle at his feet. He yanks on the pants the alpha provided. They’re a little short at the ankle, and he has to draw the drawstrings all the way out for them to stay up, but. They fit well enough.
The shirt, too, is a little big, hanging off slightly at one shoulder. It doesn’t show his breasts, and hangs down to his mid-thigh, so Jason doesn’t mind.. Both pants and tee are soft on his skin, not scratching like the other set did.
There’s a hamper. Jason drops his old clothes in, though he’d much rather see them in a dumpster somewhere. The jacket—
Jason hadn’t realized how much it had been comforting him until now. Without it, he feels almost naked. Exposed. He wants to put it back on again. He resists the urge, though. Instead, he straightens it as best he can, then folds it in half and lays it on top of the hamper before he exits the bathroom.
Tim isn’t in the living room any more, and Jason stands, nibbling on his lip. Maybe he should go for the door… but. He can’t bring himself to. Instead he stands there, uselessly, until he hears rustling further down the hall.
He approaches tentatively, and finds Tim in the den at the end of the hall.
Tim glances up when he hears Jason approach, and smiles a little. “I was just getting out some nesting materials,” he says, gesturing.
In front of him is a cushioned nest base, held off the ground by a wooden frame. Piled on top of it is—
Jason had been expecting maybe a couple of blankets and some pillows, but—
The blankets are piled tall; the one on top Jason recognizes as the blanket he’d been using on the couch. There are plenty of pillows, too—and padding, for added layers, and cushions, and, it’s… It’s a lot.
Jason’s throat feels a little tight. “Thanks,” he says, voice small.
“Of course, pup,” Tim says gently. He’s pulled his scent in tight now, but when he draws nearer, Jason catches a whiff of safehere and everythingsokay drifting off of him. His hand moves slow enough it would be easy for Jason to avoid it, but. He stays still, letting the alpha brush his knuckles over his cheek.
“Goodnight, pup,” he murmurs. “If you need me, I’ll be just down the hall.”
Jason nods. The alpha’s hand drops, and then he leaves.
The rest of the den… It’s not bare, but it lacks a personal touch. There’s a chest of drawers in the corner closest to the closet; a nightstand by the nest; and curtains hanging over the window. He shuffles further in, leaving the door open behind him.
He leaves the nest alone for now. Instead—
He goes for the closet first, opening the door. It’s bare inside, except for a thin layer of dust. Jason shuts it again. He opens the drawers, as quietly as he can. Empty as well. The den smells— Not stale, it’s definitely been used before, but. He catches the barest hints of alpha scent, and other than that… It just smells clean.
Jason rubs at his eyes.
No more putting it off.
As much as he doesn’t want to… Jason doesn’t shut the door all the way. Instead, just like in the bathroom, he leaves it open the tiniest sliver. Anything more, and he won’t be able to sleep. Anything less—
Panic.
Even the thought makes his heart race.
Jason rubs his face. He hates this. He hates it so much. Fuck. Sometimes it feels like life is just out to get him. Like—someone or something out there wants him to suffer.
Stop it. Plenty of people have it worse than you do, he scolds himself. He’s safe right now, or— He has the illusion of safety, at least. The alpha is being nice. Jason is— He’s not bound up. The door isn’t locked. There are no bars on the window. Tim treated his injuries. Held him when he cried. Gave him food and something to drink and soft clothes.
And he’d given Jason plenty of material to make a nice, comfortable nest to den in. One that might finally satisfy the instincts that have been screaming at him.
Jason takes a breath, and pads over to the nest. The sheer amount of material before him is almost overwhelming, but… He goes through it slowly. He starts with the padding, layering it into the nest base and using the cushions to help give it shape. He tests it as he goes, until he has something that’s plush, but not so much that it will engulf him. He works a nest cover over it. It’s a bit of a struggle to get it on, but Jason manages; only a little winded by the end. What padding and cushions he didn’t use—
He decides to put them in the closet, where they’ll be out of the way.
Blankets next.
Jason sorts through the pile slowly, rubbing each on his cheek. Scenting them. The one he used on the couch is the strongest scented; still thick with the contentment he’d felt in the alpha’s arms, and the protective, comforting scent Tim had drenched the air with.
He ends up using a little over half of the blankets Tim provided. The rest he puts in the closet.
Pillows—
Jason doesn’t use as many of them. He ends up putting most of them in the closet. And then, finally—
His nest is done.
He stands back, surveying his handiwork. He trills with pride, running his hand over the edge. His nest is soft. Cozy. It needs— It needs books. And— His fox. He misses his fox, the one his mom gave him. He kept it— He managed to keep it safe, all this time.
It’s probably gone now. Or ruined.
His eyes sting, and he swipes at them roughly.
Jason is so tired of crying.
He climbs into bed, pulling the blankets over and around him, snuggling down into the pillows. It feels—
Safe.
There’s something missing, though. Jason— He’s not sure what it is, but—
He’ll worry about it in the morning.
#jaytim#timjay#tauriawritesfanfic#aob dubcon fic#i'm so tempted to start posting even tho i usually prefer to wait till its done#ive broken everything into chapters; have a list of tags; wrote a summary...#i do not. have a fucking title tho#most of my titles were brainstormed for the 15k version!! which. hm. i *could* post that separately maybe...?#smth to think about#a n y w a y#hope u enjoy <333#as soon as this fic lets go of the chokehold it has on me i'll get back to like#prompts & the other wips languishing in my docs#(and when i say chokehold i mean i started writing this around like... december 20th?)#(and you can thank abyss for THAT too bc this all spiraled from 8k of a genfic i showed them <3)
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now im not saying anything about whether or not you ~should~ vote for the immigrant-hating palestinian-killer who happens to be a "democrat" but i swear if i see one more post about how "if everyone had just voted! trump never would have gotten in office and we don't want that to happen again!!" i'm gonna go chimp mode
trump didn't even win the popular vote, you idiots. am i the only one who remembers the weeks of protests because of it?
#the queen of trash has spoken#please do not discourse with me i am but a humble farmer#like this is the weirdest piece of copium ever#and maybe it's because votepilled libmaxers have memory-holed themselves#into misremembering one of the biggest issues in our 'democratic' system wherin a small portion that doesn't even represent the population#is allowed to overrule the population in deciding our literal national leader#(because i think recognizing that america is not a democracy would instantly fry some of these folks brains)#but it boggles my gd brain that ppl will eqaute not voting to trump winning to... Everything that's been going on#which don't get me wrong. there were some abhorrent policies introduced during his reign. supreme court justices etcetc#(which don't even get me started on scotus)#but. myfriends. i'm sorry to say this. but we the people didn't want him then either lmao. i made apost about it in 2020 too because these#ppl come out of the woodwork every five years like Fuckin cicadas#and it's the same fucking shit every fucking time.#A N Y W A Y#vote locally if you can; be verbal and active locally; protest dissent and organize locally#but for the love of god. it was eight years ago can we not collectively remember reality 8 years ago?
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i actually take it back. no one should read the tolling bells by @edsbacktattoo bc it will make tears inexplicably come out your eyeballs, even tho you're a strong, independent woman who doesn't show emotional vulnerability for normal mentally well reasons, and this will inevitably lead to a headache, and then you will spend the next several hours complaining to anyone who will listen that you have a headache, did you know i have a headache? my head really hurts, you guys
anyway, definitely don't read this, it may irrevocably alter your immortal soul in a way that is potent and yet indescribable with the words available to you in the english language. (idk about other languages, i haven't tried)
also, it might give you a headache. did i mention that part already? just sayin'
#definitely don't click that link#don't go and have your heart turned to stone#only to find that having it resume beating hurts even worse#-george washington voice- dying is easy young man living is harder#sure let's quote hamilton in a post about ofmd fanfiction let's just accept that's where this life has led us to why not#guys my head rly hurts#and i'm being so brave about it#(no i'm not)#(i'm being a whiny bb and i want someone to bring me four ibuprofen and a juice box)#i think i've lost the thread of these tags#i also might not have slept that long#a n y w a y#blackbonnet#blackbonnet fic#ofmd#ofmd fic
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hi hello i’m here to scream over leathermouth frank again plsineedhelp~🎃
#fuck#i have so much need and very many thoughts#frank pls#LM frank is on another level#i think it’s the energy. the vibe. the bod— uh any way#a n y w a y#leathermouth frank anyone???#frnkiebby#frank iero#mcr#frnkiero#mcrmy#mcr5#frnkie#my chemical romance#my chem#ilhsm
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Next chapter going up shortly! We're getting some final scraps of fluff towards the end of this chapter before we really dive into both the Frank's Trial arc (which obviously includes the ninja shenanigans happening at the same time, though stuff will obviously play out a bit differently) and a more serious arc having to do with Jane's hunt for Derek and Anthony.
So enjoy this moment, this calmness, this fluff. Then buckle your seatbelts, please keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times, cause we are going on a RIDEEEEEEE
#the red thread#it is coming#frank's trial and ninjas and elektra shenanigans#and then some shit with stick obviously and boy do i have some fucking PLANS for that FUCKFACE MCIHATEHIM#(aka fandom catharsis cause we all want it)#along with jane having healed just enough to really start chasing after derek and then anthony#anyway you get a serious discussion with Karen and also some fluff with Matt cause we all deserve it he deserves it give that boy a hug#before shit goes down cause uh#yeah#A N Y W A Y#who's foreshadowing i'm not foreshadowing#in this house We Hate Stick hours are 24 hours a day 7 days a week we do not take holidays
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[id: fanart of Pinocchio from Dimension 20’s Neverafter. Pinocchio is a wooden marionette doll with a broken off nose, dressed in a bright red shirt with a white ruff and three buttons. His limbs show off the texture of the wood, and his feet are flat ovals while his hands have gloves covering them. He’s hanging in an uncomfortable position by red strings, one of his arms is pulled straight back, the strings attached at the wrist making his hands limp. His legs bend at the knee but one of his feet is twisted the wrong way around. His eyes are small dots, and the wood grain knots at the eyes, giving him a worried, harrowed appearance. His strings are red, and they connect to a slightly open doorway, or perhaps a slightly open book, that only opens to a redness that matches the strings. Surrounding him are the words, “Pinocchio was a young wooden boy who was completely free and able to have fun. End id]
He’s just a kid :(
Rosamund | Ylfa
#neverafter#d20#dimension 20#nva#neverafter pinocchio#pinocchio nva#d20 pinocchio#i dont know if i have an idea for the rest of the group#pib i might…. its not really a fleshed out idea#but the thing about gerards i feel like the emotion id want to convey….not the gobe i’m trying to draw with#i also struggled thinking of what kind of words i wanted to put here: the ive got no strings song was tempting#i didnt really wanna do a disney song tho- so this is actually the thing timothy writes in his book that disappears in ep 7#a n y w a y#i couldnt get the ears to look good so they got nixed which is a shame because i love drawing cartoony stick out ears#ears just arent scary i suppose
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sequence of events
step 1: see EA for baldurs gate 3 and decide to wait until full game is out before playing
step 2: see the little vampire man. assume you will hate him because he is a pompous little shit
step 3: start playing game, and be mean to little vampire man. little vampire man loves this and bangs you immediately
step 4: realize little vampire mans story aligns very closely to some of your own experiences in life and fall head over heels
step 5: fall into a deep pit of despair as your waking thoughts are consumed by little vampire man
step 6: begin reading fanfic
step 7: begin writing fanfic
step 8: while writing fanfic realize you never really let yourself wrestle with your experiences that align closely to little vampire mans and start losing all your weekends to working through feelings thanks to little vampire man
step 9: realize you cannot draw little vampire man in any way that will be satisfactory
step 10: ????? we are at step 10 (edit to add: if you'd like to join me in hell, this blog is for posting my fanart, links to fanfiction, and has a reasonable drip feed of bg3 art of 4 posts a day from my queue)
#i didnt mean to get to this place#did you see neil newbon has a new medusa tattoo#watched him cry talking about how important the character has been to him#a n y w a y#bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion
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and like let it be know that my annoyance about this is that people who use goth/metalhead/alternative as some kinda label for things it should not be added to is that it's been heavily sexualized and people are such fucking freaks and i can't even try to count how many times i've been treated like some sexed up object by people for being alternative. Like men have come up to me and asked me if i'm kinky bc i'm "one of those" etc
#that's not really relevant in the conversation of people being sad that ghost isn't metal bc they don't like actual metal BUT it's relevant#in the conversation of people labeling themselves and things as GOTH when they're not#A N Y W A Y#nice weather we're having huh gang
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jeremy dooley, letsplay ↳ unknown video
#jeremy dooley#achievement hunter#letsplay#unknown video#aestheticsyoutubers#aesthetics#youtube aesthetic#youtube#i tried finding the video for this and i just wanna say something#anyone who's like 'message for content source' can fuck right the fuck off#just fucking put it in the tags?? like the rest of us?????#it's literally not that fucking hard?????#a n y w a y#on a scale of one to fuck off i'm gonna tell you where you need to be
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