#he thinks he feels real comfortable
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Y’all remember that one scene where Chad rested his head on gummigoo’s back 🙂
Uhhhhajsnjwkss yeah this is a ship I dunno if it’s got a name but I’ll call it gummichad just here to beg for some gummichad from y’all PLEASE I NEED GUMMICHAD-
#FIGHT ME#I’m becoming obsessed with Chad x gummigoo aghhhsjegakndbw#tadc#gummigoo#tadc chad#hc- Chad rests anywhere on gummigoo whenever he gets the chance#he thinks he feels real comfortable#+ another hc- gummigoo gets flustered real easily depending on the person#Chad x gummigoo#they’re so dumb ❤️#I shall call it#uhhhhhhhh the uhhhhh#I dunno gummichad or something?#ah whatever#gummichad#DOES THIS SHIP EVEN EXIST??#I know there’s the trio ship but how bout these two#I dunno couldn’t find nothing PLEASE I NEED GUMMICHAD#yo if you’re here#this was added later on just wanted to say gummigoo was probably really enjoying that hug
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MARRIAGE COUNSELING W ART PLEASEEEEEEEE GOD THE DEVASTATION THAT TAKES PLACE ON THAT COUCH
i think about it alot. tashi staying with patrick, her injury never happening. your arts college girlfriend and now you're married and it feels fucking stagnant, your relationship. but neither of you wants to give up. neither of you wants to reveal to the other true feelings.
under the cut because this got long and i have a whole au in my hear around this concept
you're only in counseling because of tashi. because shes still in your lives, her and patrick. and she recommended it to art when they were having one of their 'friend' lunches. and now here you are, because of course art took her advice.
he hasn't said anything, though. despite pleading for this. saying he wanted to save your marriage, that he wanted to love you how you should be loved but he didn't know how.
so here you are, on opposite ends of the couch, with the counselor staring at the empty space between you like that in itself is very telling. you suppose it is, in a way. couples who want to stay together should be unified, shouldn't they? you imagine how it would feel, if art had sat next to you. put an arm around you. squeezed you to his side. would you even be able to relax into him? its been so long since you touched eachother that way.
"so im picking up on some distance here," your therapist says. shes a small woman. almost swallowed by her chair. her glasses are perched on her nose as she gazes imperiously at empty space separating you and art. "not just physical either, though thats rather obviously there. but emotional distance. do either of you wanna comment on that?"
you cut a glance at art, expecting him to speak up since this was his idea - well. tashi's. but he just looks down at his lap, quiet. spins his wedding band around his finger.
you feel an anger so intense it pricks your eyes with tears.
"well, i guess you could start with the fact that coming here wasn't even either of our idea. it was his friends."
and now. here art speaks. his head jerks up and she shoots you an annoyed look. "you don't have to say it like that. you always say it like that. her name is tashi and she is my friend. and it was her suggestion, yeah, but it was a good one."
you look at the therapist - janet. raise your eyebrows in arts direction like, get a load of this guy. your legs cross and you start picking at a stray string from the couch.
"first words of the session and its to talk about another woman."
arts inhale is sharp and you can feel his eyes on you but you dont look at him. you can't. you wont. you're right, anyway. he can try to deny it all he wants but you know - you know what you are to him. you know where all your problems stem. you dont need to be here to make any grand discoveries over a fact you've resigned yourself too.
"i see." janet says. "and art having a relationship with this other woman upsets you."
"everything upsets her." art cuts in, sounding tired. his elbow is braced on the arm of the couch and hes chewing on his thumb in one of his nervous gestures. he always did that, as long as you've known him. he was a nail biter, he'd chew his lips raw, he'd nibble on straws, the ends of his pens. he was either lost in thought or agitated. your guess was the latter. "nothing i do makes her happy."
"is this true? are you unhappy with art?"
your skin feels hot. you shift around in your seat. the attention is all on you, and it feels like you've done something wrong, even though you know its literally janets job to ask questions.
"more like i know I'm not what he wants and that makes me...... really fucking sad."
art knees almost knock against yours as he turns his body to face you, giving you his full attention the first time today. you cant meet his eyes still, so you look at the faded spot on his jeans. light blue, like his eyes. you wonder how hes looking at you. cant make yourself look up to see.
"what." he stops. seems to gather some thoughts. tries again, with a steadier tone. "what are you talking about."
you try not to roll your eyes. your arm flings out limply.
"just that this whole thing is a joke, art." and you let out an exasperated laugh, even though nothing is funny. nothing has been funny or light between you two in a long time. "we're only here because the girl you really wanted to marry, told you to get your fucking shit together. you didn't ask us to come here because you wanted to mend something, you're here to please tashi. because if playing a good husband is a role she wants for you - well, you want to play it right, dont you?"
its quiet after that. in the silence you cant help but think about those early days. when you'd been full of love and light and art seemed to be really happy with you. you'd go on dates to the movies, walk through the park together with your hands swinging between you. laugh together and steal kisses whenever you could. you felt high back then.
it didn't even matter that art had a crush on tashi, because hell, you had one too, at the time. but she'd started dating patrick, and they seemed to mesh well together. they were both so intense and passionate. back then, you'd been alot closer to tashi yourself. patrick too. you remember the way she'd rant about how much she fucking hated him, pacing around your room and calling him every name under the sun. and you'd sit there with eager curiosity, and ask her why she didn't end it then. if he makes you so angry, why stay?
and she'd get this faraway look in her eyes. kind of wistful. kind of sad. kind of happy.
"because he makes me feel fucking alive. hes like a - like a drug or something. i cant quit. its addictive, you know?"
that stuck with you. it still sticks with you. you remember being envious of that kind of passion. youe relationship with art had always been so easy. you dont think you'd ever fought by that point. you loved art. you felt safe with art. but were you addicted to him? if you broke up - would you feel withdrawal symptoms?
sometimes you layed awake at night and thought about starting a fight - breaking up for no reason. just to see if he'd fight for you back, if the missing of eachother would be so intense one of you would cave.
but somehow you knew that wouldn't be the case. thats just not how you and art operated. if you got angry, he wouldn't rise to meet you, he'd back down. if you ended things, he wouldn't chase you, he'd let you go.
patrick and tashi were fire and brimstone and you and art was ice and you were....... dirt. solid. walked upon. dependable and not at all exciting.
when art had proposed to you after college graduation it wasn't spur of the moment as it had been with patrick when he'd swept tashi up with a ring and a elopement to vegas. it was talked about and agreed upon and you knew it was coming.
you still said yes.
"you think," and arts voice has a barely concealed tremble to it that makes you look up, finally. you're shocked to see he looks wounded. so many of his expressions you can count on one hand - and this - this wasn't one of them. his eyes are dark, stormy. "you think i dont care about our marriage beyond what someone else has to say about it? you really think that?"
you hate the sliver of guilt you feel, because its not a crazy thing to feel.
"yeah, i really do."
because well, that's the truth of the matter isn't it? you and your husband stare at eachother. and it feels like you're looking at a stranger. not the man who's freckles you used to kiss. who's fears you knew. who's hands you know every callous of, every divot and fingerprint.
"it seems you two have very different views of how the other views this marriage." janet cuts in, sounding curious. she taps her pen against the open notepad on her lap. "art, would you like to chime in on why you wanted to come here? even at the suggestion of someone else?"
art stares at you for a long moment. his face is unreadable to you. his jaw works before his chest expands on an exhale and he looks away.
"i guess i - i just didn't realize how..... stagnant things had gotten until it was pointed out to me. harshly." he winces, and you wonder exactly what tashi had to say to him. you haven't talked to the other woman for some time. contact fizzling out after your marriage to art. he flicks a glance to you, then away again. "im not the best at being aware of shit going on around me." his hand comes up to rub nervously at his neck. "i guess you could say im good at brushing things under the rug. going through the motions. that sort of thing."
janet nods like this makes sense to her. well, great, you think. you know my husband more than i do.
"you're not a fan of confrontation, are you?"
art actually laughs. a genuine one. one that brings a dimple to his cheek and flashes his teeth. you stare at it, like its an exotic animal, and you wont see it again. quickly you catalog the expression in your memory, so you dont forget what he looks like when hes happy.
"yeah, no." he shakes his head. "but I think thats part of the problem. I've obviously let too much shit get put under the rug and now its so full other people are noticing."
you look down at your hands, lips pressed together. your face burns at the knowledge that tashi and by extension - patrick - know your marriage is in shambles. how embarrassing, to be caught lacking in such a momentous way. to come up short and have your husbands friends know about it. you wonder - does he talk about all the ways you make him miserable with them? does patrick shake his head, say, "she's sucking the life out of you, man." does tashi look at him with pity? like hes some poor abused cat that needs to be let in from the rain?
the rain of your marriage.
the rain of you.
you're the storm. you're the problem. you're not enough. art needs fire. you're not even dirt, you're glass. and you can feel yourself breaking.
"that clearly hit a nerve, my dear." janets voice is soft. soothing. she hands you a tissue and you realize you'd begun to cry. "do you want to explain what you're feeling about what art said?"
"i...."
you dab dab dab at your eyes. sniffle. look around the room, trying to collect your thoughts. they feel like flyaway dandelions. you dont know which of them to grasp.
a warm hand settles over yours in your lap and you startle. its arts hand. warm and calloused and tan, covering yours. the gold glint of his wedding ring winks at you, the engraved words etched into them, "my soft epilogue". a shortened version of your favorite qoute i think we deserve a soft epilogue, my love.
at the time, that's what art was to you. your life before him hadn't been easy. being with art had felt like coming home from a long day and falling into a soft bed. it had felt like being able to land after weeks of being made to fly.
you turned your palm up, so he could slide his fingers between yours. he squeezed your hand.
"i think, i. i think i just think - I'm a failure." your bottom lip wobbles. you look at your enterwoven fingers and it makes you so sad that you haven't done the simple gesture of holding your husbands hand in months. "the two most important people in your life are. are so passionate and loud. and i see. i see how happy they make you - and i cant - i cant b-be that for you. we aren't - im not - you dont need me. im not a limb for you how they are. you could extract yourself from me and be. be happier."
your breath shudders out of you.
"you don't need me." you echo.
you wait for him to pull his hand away. this is more than you thought you'd share. some of it you weren't even aware of till the words were spilling from your lips. but they ring true.
without patrick and tashi art would drown. without you..... he'd float just fine.
"and that's important to you." janet says. a statement not a question. "you want to feel needed by art, and you feel as though you aren't. that his needs are met better with his friends than with you."
you nod slowly.
"baby." the word sends a shock through you. not the word itself but how its said. art calls you baby all the time, in a monotonous kind of way. routine. now he says it softly. with feeling. he lets go of your hand in favor of cupping your cheek, still damp with tears, turning your face to his. he looks pained. "of course i need you. i know i haven't been good at showing it. i just - you shut down - after we got married. you've been like a fucking ghost. like you dont want me to touch you. like i could dissappear for all you care and you'd just carry on. i don't know. but i need you, okay? i. need. you."
both hands cup your face, he makes you stare right into him. the conviction in his voice takes your breath away. theres a fire burning there you've thought long put out.
"obviously we have shit to sort out, and we will. but you've got to. you've got to know that. tashi only pushed me to do this because she how - how desperate i was. that's all."
you inhale deeply. exhale. swallow hard. tears cling to your lashes. you reach a hand up to clutch at one of arts wrists. eyes fluttering automatically when you do. you feel grounded again. less like you might float away.
"okay."
"yeah?"
"yeah...." and you smile. it trembles across your lips. but its there. "we'll sort our shit."
art lets out a relieved breath. kisses your forehead, lingering there. the gesture so tender you get emotional again. you want to crawl into his lap, have him wrap you in his arms. you want to feel held by him, like you used to.
"our time is up." janet sets her pen down. smiles. "but i think that was a wonderful first session. i can see the love between you hasn't faded, and that's more i can say for alot of couples who come to see me. keep your chin up."
#ask#poppy fic#i guess?#see its complex right because reader definitely isn't crazy art DID feel some kind of way abt tashi#and still does#but hes in love w us. he is.#its just different. like.#its complicated but its like. art cant allow himself to feel passion because he thinks its too much#and you WANT passion like patrick and tashi have. you want it mixed in with the comfort and stability w art.#but arts self worth is low so hes like. why fight passionately for anything if im not enough im not enough ig#and thats sm he needs to overcome#because its making you feel unwanted#also theres definitely some feelings for patrick and tashi on your side as well#tashi definitely misses you and wishes you would talk to her#so many more thoughts on this#anyway#art donaldson x reader#reader and art just need to FUCK real rawdog real sloppy#art donaldson#challengers x reader#art x reader#failmarriage au
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I'm sorry I let down my guard.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#xue yang#xiao xingchen#God DAMN this scene was brutal. Season 2 episode 2 is almost nothing but misery and anguish#Helena by Nickle Creek does not quite fit the comic's vibe but it is absolutely a Xue Yang song so I linked it.#The change from “Helena don't walk away...(gentle)” to “HELENA. DON'T WALK AWAY (threat)” is fantastic.#And “Don't waste your pretty sympathy - I'll always be just fine”. Xue Yang core.#Okay now for the real meat. Disclaimer first: *I really like XY.* I think he's a great character. I think his actions consistently-#come from a place of deep trauma. While his reactions and actions put him in a villainous role he is still human about his hurt#and what I'm about to say is NOT intended to be a statement of causality or villianize a group of misunderstood people.#So with that said...Man oh man does Xue Yang have a lot of BPD traits. More that just 'character who is chronically manipulative'.#The impulsivity and emotional reactions and seeking stability makes him feel like he needs that control. What other choice is there?#The part that really gets me is how he *wants* to be safe and happy. But his past experiences tell him how thats impossible#He's the kind of person who goes 'if you don't like me then you better hate me for something substantial". All (pos) or All (neg)#''Love me entirely or Hate me. But don't you dare leave me or forget about me.''#Not at all comfortable saying 'BPD coded'. Im not a psychiatrist. Just that he has TRAITS. Feel free to disagree or add your thoughts.#ppl with bpd also are not a monolith and everyone has very different experiences. Xue yang is very complex. People more so.
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I think it’s so ironic that the Pony Express escapes a lot if not all blame in discussion. I can’t even say I am excused from it but it’s just how hard people circle back to the characters alone without considering the environment they were made to be in.
Why would they design a ship where only two of the rooms lock? Not the bathroom? Not the sleeping quarters? We assume that all the companies in the universe are this shallow and careless to their workers but we explicitly know the Pony Express in extra vile. They are fed processed slop pack they can’t even really cook and the ration of those pack is meager at best. They hired and made people with a plethora of conflicting demeanors and beliefs work together on a mission where cohesion is important if not an outright necessity and punish them for not being happy about it. There’s no social protocols, not chain of command other than Captain’s word/choice and the only way to enforce that is with a literal firearm. They don’t allow them to celebrate freely and even took away leisure activities that would make them less stir crazy. They are only allowed a few hours of sleep despite their being no other real responsibilities or work on the ship, no matter the position or its importance. With any crew, with any level of synergy, this was a powder keg waiting for a spark.
I’m not saying characters that made mistakes didn’t make huge ones, but I think part of the horror is that at least for some (this is targeting Jimathan) those mistakes are partly made by a force of the hand. There’s a running theme of lack of choice and being forced into something and the very nature of how The Pony Express expected them to function plays a big part.
#like even I forget that all actions taken in the game were people trying to remain in protocol outside of Jimmy#Anya couldn’t have jus stolen the scanner and got the gun cause she’s a sensible person and knows she’d be in legal trouble#or get everyone’s credits docked or just hoping that there’s some chain of command for this sort of thing#Daisuke only really acted in accordance to his direct superiors because he’s an intern he wouldn’t know the first thing about protocol or#what to do in any situation. like this is essentially implied to be his first real job#Curly may be the captain but he still has to follow rules and procedures and we see with the letter the Pony Express likely has very shady#and shitty ones. he gives the best not depressing or totalitarian options he can otherwise everything is just his word which aren’t even his#or like him just asserting his position with the gun which he wouldn’t do#Swansea follows the book begrudgingly because he’s trying to stay right and not fall back into who he once was#I feel like it’s not incorporated nearly enough that the environment they were dropped into heavily affected their actions#say there was a single person higher than Curly or a plan of action when a crew member is considered a danger to himself or others#I think it’s fascinating how people will stick to protocol and break when they get scared or to their limit#cause the game shows how normalcy deteriorates and I think discounting what the characters where put through by the company takes a way a#real and scary aspect of what happened to Anya because as a friend Curly didn’t do enough for her at all his comfort was there and he#appreciated but it was a distracted sort of care but as a Captain he didn’t protect her but he’s was a Captain of the Pony Express like what#if they told him to wait to? he still should’ve done something because Anya was actively suffering and Jimmy should’ve been reprimanded but#he’s a captain with orders like the Tulpar isn’t his ship in the same way like#god I wanna explain this in a way that makes sense but the Tulpar is like designed to breed animosity and work on the bare requirements one#needs to get things done that’s not how people work and if anyone deviates or interrupts that it literally has nothing to handle it#it becomes clear that if any social unrest happens why they just say fuck it and give the Captain the gun because if something happens the#blame can easily be placed on the person they put in charge despite what they put them#in charge of like this is just like work place harassment irl because often the perpetrators are not punished but the supervisors for not#stopping them with meetings or cuts or whatever but the environment the company fostered is rarely fixed or blamed#like why was this allowed to occur? and honestly that is because Jimmy did what he did#ask me about this if this is confusing cause I worded it crazy#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#the pony express
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The interesting thing about Jiang Cheng is that he refuses to be his mother's golden child to Wei Wuxian's scapegoat; he actively chooses Wei Wuxian again and again. He defends Wei Wuxian from her until she dies. It's unusual.
This doesn't mean that Wei Wuxian's experience was any less fraught--being hated by a caretaker is awful even if everyone else loves you. But it was an interesting choice by MXTX.
#pallas.rtf#mdzs#this is perhaps because i spent a lot of time on various subreddits#but either golden children don't protect their siblings or the golden children who protect their siblings don't end up posting on reddit#because i've never encountered a clear golden child and scapegoat dynamic like jc & wwx's in real life or in fiction#i suppose that's wuthering heights again--cathy defends heathcliff (until she learns how to be a proper lady)#but i don't know. it's interesting to see jc step in for wwx directly in the novel and then contrast that to wwx comforting jc after jfm#doesn't praise jc for helping to save wwx#i often wonder if wwx was as resentful in the moment or if--like all memories--wwx reframed that interaction after the golden core transfer#the way he talks about jc like he's sooo delicate and breakable that obviously wwx has to comfort him is v. reminiscent of how he acts like#jc almost directly forced wwx to do this mad impossible thing because jc was sad and breaking#if jc read mdzs he'd probably curl up in a miserable little ball#but yeah like... memories are shaped so much by what we think and feel now#all memory is imagination... and wwx was a tormented ghost for 13 years because no one offered him anything#so what would that do to you?#i'm off topic
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Help! I’ve fallen for a rarepair from a show that ended 6 years 1 month and 7 days ago!
And by rarepair I mean there is one singular fic about them where they’re not a side ship or in a collection of smut drabbles
#don’t worry Graham and Jefferson I saw the way you never interacted but were in such similar situations caused by the same woman#all it would have taken was for Graham to get some kind of hint that Jefferson knew and he could have gone to him :.(#gotten the help he needed from someone who actually knew what was going on#JEFFERSON WOULD HAVE FIGURED OUT THE VAULT#HE WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO PUT GRAHAMS HEART BACK#THE COMFORT THEY WOULD GET FROM EACH OTHER#Jefferson having someone who remembers ;~;#Graham having someone who knows he’s not crazy#who could protect him from Regina ;~;#Graham could live with him in his mansion in the woods#with his wolf brother right there#and let’s be real Graham would not have been okay after getting his heart back#like he was literally emotionally numb and being abused for thirty years#everything that happened to him and what he was forced to do would have hit him like a truck the minute it was back in his chest#probably would have had a panic attack immediately#probably the only way he would feel safe is as far from Regina he could get (Jefferson’s mansion in the middle of the woods)#in a locked room and with his wolf brother right there#I just think they could be a really soft friends to lovers okay#ouat#jefferson ouat#graham humbert#huntsman ouat#once upon a time#also I’m not Regina bashing down here I just wish Grahams abuse and trauma was treated better#like there’s no way in hell he would ever forgive her or feel safe around her#he’d probably want her dead#another thing he and Jefferson have in common#but I can imagine him never acting on it and just completely removing himself from the show and living a safe and comfortable cottage-core#life with Jefferson and Grace#and his wolf brother
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hhhhhghgg... jason grace thoughts... [my telekinetic powers make every wall in my house explode]
#jason grace#during the time after the titan war and before the events of the lost hero there was a that period of 3-4 months when leo and piper were#under the influence of the Mist and believed they were spending time with jason. right? yeah okay so#jason is still at camp jupiter but occasionally he has blackouts in which he is sort of present in the wilderness school with leo and piper#when he comes back he thinks theyre just like#weird dreams or whatever#but they feel real and he starts to remember specific moments and behaviors with the two strangers in his dreams#however#by the time jason wakes up on the bus. he obviously has no recollection of his life#or those weird blackouts that happened all the way up to his disappearance#back at camp jupiter. reyna would be there for jason when he blacked out and would bring him to somewhere safe and comfortable#for him to rest until he woke up#and sometimes jason would talk when he was unconscious#it was always indistinguishable but sometimes reyna swore she heard him say names#anyways im completely insane about jasom grace and i am forever attached to this kid
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I will never make this because it would be for an audience of one (me) but ever since reading "If we Were Villains" (story about serious drama kids in college who perform shakespeare and deal with a murder) I have been entertaining the thought of a crack fic crossover with High School Musical The Musical The Series where the staff decides they will no longer put on shakespeare after the tragic accident that happened at Thanksgiving, because Shakespeare plays would only increase the tension and drama. So they hire Ms. Jen who decides their spring play will actually be High School Musical (which exists in the 90s in this universe) and it ruins the vibe so much that everyone gives up on being dark and mysterious because they're universally pissed at Ms Jen for making them learn choreoraphed basketball dancing.
#if we were villains is actually genuinely good and has actual literary worth and pulls from shakespeare in an intelligent meaningful way#but unfortunately all i can do is comedy so this is the only fan content i have to offer :(#THE THING IS iwwv is just hsmtmts if it hsmtmts was good and also they committed crimes#they utilize the same parallel of casting choices with real life drama which I love#umm so casting: Meredith would be Sharpay Obvi. I think it would be really funny if James was cast as Ryan bc they hate eachother and would#have to pretend to be siblings working together. And I think ashley tisdale and Lucas Gabreel actually didn't get along when filming#also i love the thought of Ms Jen looking at James and going “i know what you are”#HOWEVER it would be more interesting if james was Chad to Oliver's Troy (which is really just reversing their Romeo and Juliet moment)#bc chad is like nooo don't do theater... stick with me and do basketball... but it would be Coded Subtextually#Unfortunately Wren would be typecast as Gabriella and I don't think that would cause drama bc I don't believe James actually liked her!#I think it was comp het bc she was very sweet and nonthreatening as opposed to Meredith's big flirting energy so she would be a “safe” crus#lets lean into that actually. this gives Wren a chance to have a personality (bc I enjoy this book but it is not good at fleshing out women#So oliver and Wren spend more time together and kind of talk about James a little and Wren is like yeah James is very sweet#and I like him but it feels so hard to get him to feel comfortable with me... i guess he's just closed off and doesn't talk much#we also get to see more of her personality and interests maybe she's like I relate to gabriella because I also like to Read :) feminism#and oliver is like Hmm That Is Not My Experience With Him perhaps our bond is deeper and James does like me Hm#And then Meredith can flirt with him as Sharpay and James gets pissed and in character gets very intense about how Troy can't join THEATER#that's why he's upset and sad bc sharpay represents theater and only that reason and nothing else and he isn't in love with oliver At All#Alexander can be Ryan now since James is Chad (and he's also Gay) and Filippa can be Kenzie bc they're both queer coded#Anyway at rehearsal one day Meredith and James and Oliver are having their fighting over troy moment and then Meredith stops and is like#wait guys. This musical is so freaking stupid. why are we even doing this#and their mutual frustration at their art being turned into a farce is enough to bond them together and they're like#we need to focus on our REAL enemy: ms Jen#and then they hatch a scheme and it's probably like. They dump a bucket of fake blood on her at opening night a la carrie#and then put on their own rebellious production... it still has to be a musical because i like musicals#families with children are in the audience and they're like OK FOLKS! HERE'S ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW!#if we were villains#iwwv#hsmtmts#high school musical the musical the series
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So uh. MelDan ammirite? This (kinda) blew up on Insta and other socmed I use so ig I'mma upload this here too lol
It started as a crackship (and it's still is, I kinda like to jokingly them imagine them pretending to like each other but actually wanting to skin each other alive, a little ooc for both of them, but it's mostly just for fun) but rn I'm exploring the potential ""relationship"" through a more angsty lense.
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#hpma oc#hpma daniel#my art#magic awakened#daniel page#melly anderson#melly anscombe#OK SO#I think that there's many different ways these two could “work”#I could go with a safe route aka transfem!Daniel x Melly all cute and sweet#OOOOR I could make it angsty and potentially one sided#my current idea? Daniel knows Mel is a metamorphmagus and wants her to tell him who she really is#but Mel ofc doesn't really want that for many reasons#she doesn't feel comfortable sharing who she really is bc she doesn't want people to know the real her in general#if she tells Dan he'd pry more and he'd discover WHY she's pretending to be Melly and that's a no no#this frustrates Daniel to no end he's not even sure if Mel even likes him back sometimes#Mel feels bad for deceiving Daniel snd wants to be honest w him but she can't#although I do have somewhat of an idea why Mel would get involved w him like this I'm still trying to figure it out#(she's probably having a comphet phase + she feels lonely af and needs a distraction from everything + to move on from Melissa and Cass)#and maybe also Ivy? she avoids her several reasons despite feeling heartbroken to do so#real question is tho what does Dan even see in her lol#that's def smth I gotta think about lol#but yeah. it's not canon to any of my current universes it's just for some mindless fun
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Two-faced
#beep boop#my art#vox hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#vox#cat vox#npd#actually npd#sketch#For friends who see this (am not putting this in the main thing bc it Vox and i want ppl to b able to reblog it about hazbin vox an go ooh#hes so evil ooh)#But its not meant to be like the friedly bit is a lie and the grumpy bit is real#hes being honest in both cases#hes having narc rage that he knows is illogical so even if hes grumpy and annoyed#it really IS no problem and he DOES love you#hes just also AUGH the world. not catering to me always? fuck my gay baka life#i hope this doesnt make anyone less comfortable talking to me i am just like! showing emotions i have being honest and stuff#not really a vent bc im not upset about it i just think its interesting#and fits vox's presenting tv persona thing he does#but really yall can tell me anything or if you have an issue even if i have narc emotions and feel annoyed or angry#its just a feeling.#Really its no problem at all.
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you know, i just wanna say that if were gonna put any word up on the high shelf, 'nazi' should probably be one of them. very heavy word that people throw around way too lightly, i think
#also literally anything relating to hitler#i love my good friend [redacted] but every few months he posts that one meme about steven universe trying to redeem hitler#and it. feels so bad to me for reasons i cant put into words#like. people have gotten way too comfortable with stuff about the holocaust i think#my post#people throw around nazi accusations and comparisons so much and i. hate it#there are real nazis out there. right now. maybe dont accuse randos online of it because they said an opinion you dont like
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random but I've been thinking about it for a while and decided to update pronouns in my bio (they/he instead of just they/them)... main reason is i've been "accidentally" called he a few times and was like hey.. this doesnt feel too bad actually🤔 testing it out...
#im still!! nonbinary#but pronouns =/= gender identity (i.e. he/him =/= male)#my gender is... im a guy. but with no gender (bc gender is not real to me#like i do not subscribe... i opt out... i do not participate#but i still like presenting masc... i call myself transmasc for clarity but yea. no gender guy#they/them is still a safe bet#*the safest bet#i will still be v happy to be called they/them... i think those r the most comfortable#bc i rly like that it fits w how i feel abt not subscribing to gender#but i also get euphoria from perceived as masc so yeah... testing!!!#i think i feel confident enough to do this now#talk tag
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I'm going to draw Taffy ship art tomorrow solely out of spite.
And perhaps post it in the server.
If I'm feeling extra petty.
#you cannot demean the one being I actually feel comfortable like. being this way with. and just think I'm going to be okay with that.#like him being fictional doesn't take away how much I care about him. you even acknowledged that before. why does it change now?#I actually feel comfortable caring about him BECAUSE I know he can't and WOULDN'T do anything to hurt me#not just can't. I know he WOULDN'T. he wouldn't WANT to hurt me. fuck you for so clearly wanting to.#just because I don't care about you.#I'm going to care about that man so hard it'll make him real and then it'll fucking kill him#just to spite you#you know what?#Nicky isn't the only person I'll say I love anymore#I'll say I love Taffy too fuck you#I love Taffy more than I ever loved you and you can suck it#I'll probably change my mind on that by tomorrow but for now I fucking LOVE Taffy#and y'know what I'm going to draw the most sickeningly sweet ship art of us tomorrow even if it kills me
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hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this
#the reason rsa doesn't have overblots is because they understand the joy and whimsy of life and friendship btw#LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students &#school from if ANYONE had reached out to riddle and was like 'hey are you alright i heard xyz and i wanted to let you know...' ESPECIALLY#since TREY LITERALLY TELLS US 'oh well here's the lowdown on her trauma this is Probably what is causing this'#or if someone sat down to tell leona 'hey! i'm rooting for you in ur magift(?) game! you're my fav player!!' AND LET HIM FEEL NOTICED#or if someone approached azul as an Equal to try to stop his plans. as a friend even. BEYOND A BUSINESS TRANSACTION#or if ANYBODY BUT ESPECIALLY KALIM was like 'jamil i think you should follow your passions and do something you enjoy today!!' or AT LEAST#let him know he was appreciated as a person NOT JUST FOR HIS WORK#'i know you're doing a lot today but i just wanted to thank you for how much Effort you put into this and..' etc etc etc#ERM.. IF ANYONE TREATED VIL LIKE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CELEBRITY??? or even 'hey i loved you in this film i was wondering if we could#do a play together or something..!!' AND LET HER TRY A TYPE OF CHARACTER SHE NEVER GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE. and sing her praises.#if anyone reached out to idia beyond a 'hey the teacher said to come to class'/'get out of your bed and come to our housewarden meeting'#or even. IF ORTHO HIMSELF was like. 'you know it's not your fault... you didn't cause all of this. not really' OR SOMETHING#or if malleus ever got to experience a small firsthand loss AND WAS COMFORTED THROUGH IT. not just quick fix via magic. not replacing. just#GRIEVING SOMETHING??????? and wasn't feared by literally everyone#um. maybe the real twisted part is that all of this tragedy was easily preventable if we had a support system in place.#but idk. twst is a highschool. there's no support in real high school either. i'd probably overblot too if i could ajdjrjfinfdndjd#twst#chatter#LONG RAMBLE SORRY#yes overblots are essential to the plot. but also. do you know how frustrating it is watching the blot build up and sitting in silence.#I'M SORRY IK IF SOMETHING LIKE THIS WAS HAPPENING TO A GUY I JUST MET I WOULD PROBABLY NOT NOTICE.. but of it was my Friend or Housewarden..#I'D ASK BRO.... I'D ASK ... UGHHHHHUUUHHHH#not that anyone would notice if *I* was about to lose it tbh#speaks volumes about our society o think#OKAY NOW I'M DONE FOR REAL
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inarticulate waffle about dan and boundaries below the cut as to not clog up the dash
dan's attempts at gently setting and reminding his audience of his boundaries is so fascinating. he really did try to have a mutual understanding/respect with people who watched his videos and also followed him on social media of like...letting dinof not be too personal and have some kind of separation betwee dan and dinof (good example: "there are several things in my life that are none of the internet's business" vyou)
this video in particular is interesting because he goes on to talk about being back on dailybooth (which was really personal and intimate) how people should check his out, but it's like he assumes there's the understanding that he's not going to talk about the things on his db on youtube?
like he was way more kind about it than the lawless internet culture warranted and i hate that sometimes there's this picture painted of him that he's always been angry and defensive at his subscribers. i also think it's easy for people who joined the fandom after 2013ish to think he's always had that bubbling resentment but he really did try to be nice about keeping his personal life private (and not just his sexuality but even things like the whole adrian ordeal or people literally commenting/harassing his ex gfs social media)
idk it's easy to assume the angry dinof persona is the genuine dan, especially when you don't see him in other mediums like liveshows or videos of him interacting with fans or even the gaming channel where he doesn't have such a guard up and unmasks a bit. but god he just really is gentle and kind and has spent his career trying to stay that way with the people who support him, despite the reception and consistent disrespect back at him.
this doesn't really have a point other than i don't think he gets enough credit for staying as kind as he is (and i mean real dan, not dystopia daily dan) and still being willing to have the kind of unique bond with his audience that he's always been infamous for (which also is astounding how they've both managed to walk that line so well considering other creators being either too close or too blocked off from their fanbase).
idk it's just interesting how he's trying to say a lot without saying a lot and how this 18 year old kid really hoped for the best in people despite everything. dan has stayed a genuinely a lovely person when most people at this point would have become far more jaded and that's beyond impressive.
#it's also kind of a reminder why maybe he's back to being dinof on youtube right now#its safer after coming back from a long hiatus and he can have that armor#even if we dont love it and kind of hope the real dan makes an appearance soon we know he's still there and i think that says a lot#i dont think anyone here actually doubts the real dan is underneath the persona#especially seeing him irl this past year he's still the warmest most comforting person#idk how to tag this other than feeling soft for dan hour
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it’s so beautiful to me that what triggers anya’s memory of her past isn’t some big national secret or something inherently tied to the politics of her family or even her social class, it’s just a simple sensory detail of sitting in a carriage on a hot day and catching sight of a boy running after them
#anastasia broadway#anastasia musical#anastasia#dimya#i mean i get that this is the whole point of iacot alksdfj#but like#it's just a small thing?? and that feels so much more honest??#idk#also like#i know she has Been Through It but the narrative is so gentle to her#like this is just such a kind and gentle way to be reintroduced to who you used to be you know??#even though the song ends on a sad note it's still a very safe and comforting environment#a boy talking about a hot summer day and it turns out you were there too#and then we can get into the fact that the way he tells stories is exactly what she needed to unlock her memory#bc he uses sensory memories and specific details in the same way we remember childhood#like we don't think about the Overall Things going on at the time but we remember the way the food smelled or the texture of the clothes etc#and that's a much more interesting and Real story to me than anything else they could have done#letting this girl who has survived and endured so much have a moment to just. be. and letting her think about ribbons and a boy#which is why when ppl try to make her a figure either sympathizing with or against the revolution it doesn't work for me#bc it's not a show about revolution it's a show about a girl remembering the way her nanna smells when she hugs her#and in this context. that matters more#idk it's a story for the girls!!!!!#for the girls who don't remember everything but they remember their grandma's perfume and the way the carpet felt under her feet!!
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