#he really needs someone to juuuust stay by him and also stop him from being stupid

[deliciouskeys]

1 for ZM please

About a month late because this was the hardest ask on that meme I think!

Fanfic/Authors ask meme : Write a scene from [ZM] in another character’s POV

Terror POV for the entire fic: Ever since my dad brought me to this house, I'm trying to figure out what the deal is between him and his friend. They speak in angry tones a lot, but my dad really works to take care of him. They also get in bed and rub on each other, in which case they're not usually angry. My dad's friend seems disabled or something, because my dad wraps him up in a very long shiny leash. Maybe his friend will fall apart if he's not held together by that?-- I haven't seen him without it. He can't even eat on his own, he never goes outside, and he's usually in a bad mood. Like even more than my dad usually is. I'm really not sure what's wrong with him, but I'm having a good time living out here in a house with a yard.

Juuuust kidding lol.

I rewrote the second half (after the time skip asterisks) of chapter 4 (Depression) in HL's POV. It's probably not that different-- I'd like to think I write in such a way that you can tell what both halves of a dialogue are thinking, even if the third person narration is closely aligned with only one. But someone at some point was asking me what HL's gambit really was in that scene. Well here you go, 3.9k words. Not all of it brand new, of course.

~~~

Homelander never expected to find himself in such impossible circumstances. When he first found himself blind and unable to move, all his other senses felt that much sharper, and he was keenly aware of everything around him. But the more time he's spent in this state, the more it feels like he's undergoing mental vertigo. He's left alone for… he's not even sure how long. Time is now measured by how hungry he's gotten, how often he's urinated on the floor beside himself. His days used to be so full, agendas with meetings, appearances, rescues, end to end, 8 am to 8 pm at minimum, weekends included. Other members of the Seven got tired of it, took daily breaks, took long vacations. Maeve couldn't stand being forced to account for her time, and she her schedule was much more sparse than his. Homelander never resented the full agendas. No, what he dreaded was free, unstructured time, dreaded holidays when everyone would stop caring about business. He always felt uncomfortable in his own skin if he had to spend any more time alone in his apartment than the time it took him to get a full night's rest. And for his physiology a full night's rest was, for better or worse, usually only a few hours. So he'd often go on flights while most of the city still slept– he told himself he was patrolling for crime, but really he just didn't want to feel like he had to stay still in any sort of confined space. And now… now that's all he can do– lying on the floor, maybe contorting himself into a sitting position if he's feeling really ambitious. With absolutely nothing to do, nothing to see, no ability to leave, he feels numb. He feels like he's losing his mind, and not in the flashy way– just slowly feeling his sense of self disintegrating. When he was a child he used to be able to converse with himself without looking at a reflection, but that was when he was younger, and not when he was forcibly blinded. Now he only listens to the voice in his head telling him that he was stupid to think he'd be able to free himself, telling him he was going to die without seeing anything again, telling him he may have already gone blind for all he knows.

It must have been at least fifteen days since he was put in this cage, but maybe it's been thirty. He got depressed and stopped trying to keep diligent track of William's comings and goings at some point. He needs to get back to thinking clearly, if he's ever going to escape out of here, but there's nothing left that he wants to think about. He doesn't want to try to think of ways to free himself, because he spent the better part of a week trying all sorts of maneuvers and never made any tangible progress. He doesn't want to think about anything to do with his past life, because every thought is tainted by remembering that higher-ups at Vought were ones who decided to betray him and sacrifice him. Because of what? That he dared to try to act on his own instincts instead of just obeying? That he was too dangerous if he so much as expressed mild disagreement with their tactics? 

So Homelander's thoughts turn to the most basic fixations. Thirst, hunger– those get satisfied periodically, although never in the way he really wants, and he still daydreams about warm milk, other warm, bland, sweet things that could soothe his nerves. His other need has started to gnaw on him day in and day out. At this point, if one of his hands somehow managed to free itself, he'd probably waste precious time jerking himself off before trying to free the rest of his body. He daydreams about being able to shove himself inside something warm and slippery, reminisces about his vigorous nights with Maeve when she still tolerated him, remembers that one precious time with Madelyn. But he can't think himself to completion, it only makes matters worse, and he whines quietly as his painfully hard erection dies down.

His other favorite daydream these days is about being reunited with Ryan. Like the first time he found him, but even more dramatic this time. In these fantasies Ryan would come running, leap into his arms, wrap his arms around his neck, and Homelander would take off into the sky with him, take him someplace safe, away from Vought, away from Butcher's band of misfits, away from the US government. When he thinks about Ryan too long, a lump starts forming in his throat and he starts crying at the unfairness of it all– of being deprived of his son almost as soon as he found out about his existence. He can't open his eyes, but the tears seep out anyway, drip out of the metal plate, dribble down his chin, and he can't even wipe them away.

It should be embarrassing that William returns during one of these bouts of feeling sorry for himself. Homelander can recognize his car from miles away, so he sits up, legs bent, forehead pressed into his knees in a last ditch effort to retain some dignity. But there's nowhere to hide. 

"You alright mate?" he asks, and Homelander genuinely wonders if he means him or his damned dog whose loud breathing is the only sign of anyone else in his vicinity. William must be able to see that Homelander's face is covered in snot and tears. And why should he care or try to hide any of it? Any sense of embarrassment Homelander may have had is long gone. Even in the days of the lab, he was never kept this helpless for this long, and never had so many basic functions tended to by someone else. If William wants to keep him here and clean up after him for the rest of his life, that was certainly his prerogative. 

"Oi, I said, you alright?"

"Oh, fucking fantastic," Homelander says, raising his head had off his knees.

"I'll get you some more water," William says.

Homelander leans back against the unforgiving bars of the cage. The metal William has used to trap him makes him feel weak as he touches it, but it's becoming almost an addictive feeling, the strange diffusion across his muscles that makes them weak, ordinary. Is this what being a normal human feels like? Has he become warped enough that he enjoys feeling like his body's fibers are turning into jelly?

He can hear William refill his bowl of water and set it down next to him. It's a wonder that Butcher hasn't laid out newspapers on the floor for him yet, or maybe some nice sawdust or whatever it is they put in rat cages.

"You want anything else?" William has the nerve to ask.

Why yes, being allowed to feel like a person again would be nice, Homelander thinks. "You can't treat me like a fucking... hamster. You leave me here all day with some water. Nothing to fucking listen to. I'm bored out of my mind. You have a TV in here, but you're just a heartless sadist who won't even turn on some Vought News."

"You know I ain't turning Vought News on," William tells him, as if it's something to be proud of. "Here, you can listen to this."

Homelander feels stupid for being curious for a moment before he hears what must be that painter from TV describing what colors he's about to use. "Motherfucker," he mutters when he hears that William's left the house. 

Today I'm using an 18 by 24 inch double prime pre-stretched canvas, but you use whatever size you'd like.

Is he supposed to feel calm from listening to this infuriatingly self-possessed voice droning on and on about painting techniques?

And I've just covered the entire canvas with a very thin coat of liquid white. The liquid white is just designed to make the canvas wet and to make it slick, it allows us to actually blend color right here on the canvas.

Homelander groans. The slightest allusion to anything that could be remotely sexual wakes his body up, as if it's not in on what dire situation he's in. His body doesn't care. It's begging for an orgasm. Homelander tips back on the floor, desperately trying move his thighs against his cock, but it's not effective. It doesn't help that the painter has moved on to describing the painting techniques and once again, but he's still desperate. Homelander struggles, praying that he can pry his arms apart– sure, the metal wrapping them his forearms together behind his back makes them as limp as noodles, but shouldn't his desperation to touch himself count for something? It doesn't, and Homelander's body finally gives up after getting no physical encouragement.

No, this can't go on like this. He's unable to think straight. Most powerful man on earth and he can't manage to touch himself? He has to get his mind off this infernal fixation.

William comes back in, and although Homelander hasn't spoken to him much in the last few days, he just has to try to extract some information out of him, reorient himself, get back to living in the real world rather than drifting around in his thoughts. If nothing else, he has to better acquaint himself with William, because he clearly underestimated his patience and his cruelty.

"Did they hold a funeral for me yet? I can't even keep track of the days like, this."

He listens to William's breathing change, but he doesn't know if it means he's about to be lied to. "They announced they'll have one. Finally deemed you MIA enough on a classified mission that they're going to have some pomp and circumstance. The whole nation is in mourning. I'm sure Starlight is going to record a new song in your honor."

"Fuck her," Homelander spits out. The fact that she saw him in this pathetic situation, and gets to go back to her dayjob– on his team– makes him that much angrier. "What're you gonna tell Ryan, hm?" he asks. "Or are you not showing him any TV, keeping him captive too. You seem to like that, William. You and Vought."

"Fuck you. I'll tell him the same bullshit the media is going to say. You died overseas on a mission."

And although this should make Homelander feel more hopeless– Vought announcing his funeral means they've really decided he's as good as dead and won't ever return– this gives him a sudden renewed sense of purpose to get out of this confinement and show them all what he's capable of. "You're a sadistic, lying bastard," he mutters, not even sure William's impaired hearing will notice, but he heard.

"And it took you this long to deduce that, mate?"

Homelander can hear that his jailer is grinning ear to ear, clearly pleased with himself. It's a tone he hates, the tone of William when he thinks he's won something. He's won nothing, as far as Homelander is concerned. If he's so proud of being sadistic, and Homelander isn't– not in any particular way–, why aren't their positions reversed if there was any justice in this world?

"You'd be just like me if you had powers," Homelander says. "I guarantee you."

"Whataboutism rubbish. You may well be right," William says. "But I don't have powers and you do, and here we are."

It's a dead end with someone this stubborn and myopic. But Homelander just wants to keep talking. If he can't see, at least talking to someone proves he's not alone– something the voice in his head starts telling him when the house is empty and he only hears William's dog milling about.

"Can I see my son?' he demands, seeing how this tone might work out for him. He has so little that he doesn't really have anything to lose.

"Really? You're going to ask me that? Mate, you're not going to see anything ever again, not if I can help it."

It's an odd sensation, but Homelander can actually feel his eyes rolling despite the metal plate pressed firmly against them. "Fine, can I hear my son?! Jesus Christ. I haven't had contact with him in a year."

Homelander doesn't expect William to agree of course, so his breath hitches when William answers him with a curt "Fine." followed by a child's voice saying "Hello?" 

Homelander's heart skips a beat– it's Ryan's voice, distorted by the phone, maybe sounding older, because God knows he hasn't heard him in a year and that alone make Homelander emotional, that he's missed even more of his childhood. He scrambles to answer, stuttering in his agitation  "Ryan? Ryan, it's your dad, your real dad, don't believe the—"

"Hello?" But of course it was too good to be true. Homelander's shoulders slump as he realizes that he was on mute. 

"You're a fucking monster," he says, sighing, sitting back against the wall and burying his face in his knees again. This is why he stopped talking to William in the first place. It's always frustrating exchanges like these. But this last part was a dirtier trick than usual. Homelander hates that he can feel tears pricking at his eyes yet again. He should be grateful he could hear Ryan was alive and well, but that's a low bar if there ever was one.

"He's doing good, he's in good hands," William assures him, and oh Homelander's hands curl into fists, wanting to punch him full-force. There's be nothing left, and he wouldn't have to hear this patronizing tone anymore.

But as much as he hates talking to William, this is also the most exciting part of his day, and he might as well get all his questions out now that he's deigned to speak to him again and break his short-lived vow of silence. "What are they saying about me online? Can you at least tell me that?" he asks. He's glad he can still pull off an angry, haughty tone despite feeling less and less sure he'll ever be able to get out of this embarrassing imprisonment.

"I don't rightly know, I don't have time to look through Twitterspheres and Reddit threads searching your name. I'm sure it's mostly positive."

Homelander can feel his mouth twist into something that would look ugly on camera but it's just William here, and he has no reasons to disguise his emotions here. "Yeah, and people are just going to forget I exist in another couple of weeks."

"They'll always have the movie franchises to remember you by."

Homelander sniffs in disgust. He never guessed he'd be trapped long enough to even have this conversation. When he was first captured this ragtag band of misfits tried so many different methods to off him, and he thought they were bound to make a mistake somewhere along the way. With William taking him on alone, it seemed even more probable. But William barely touches him nowadays except for what's absolutely necessary– including retightening the wires around his body with annoying regularity so there's little hope of escape.

"Why haven't you even tried to fucking kill me?!" he finally yells. 

"Like I told ya. I want to really hurt you. And you are really fucking hurting like this," Butcher says. "I get to live my life, come home and get to watch you suffer. Don't see any reason to change it."

Homelander would see red if he could see anything. In what universe was any of this fair? What crimes has he committed that deserve being so tortured with boredom and humiliation by turns. He's tired of being talked down to. He's tired of being lectured by someone who clearly has his own demons and issues. He wasn't going to say this, because he wasn't sure of how the conversation would pan out, but at this point Homelander's desperate to get any sort of riled up reaction from William. Anything that increases the chances of William doing something out of the ordinary would increase his chances of escape more than being despondent and doing nothing.

"May I make a personal remark?" he asks.

"Never seen you stop and ask before," William replies, sounding amused but curious.

"Well. People tend to take offense at this one." Homelander pauses one last time, wondering if he's right to play this card now, but at this point he's desperate to shift anything about this terrible setup. "Ever since you undressed me... well, even before that sometimes, but definitely after... you just... reek of wanting to fuck me."

William burst out laughing and for some reason that's one reaction Homelander didn't anticipate in response.

"No I mean it, literally reek. I know it when I smell it. Fucking disgusting, but explains a lot. Wish you'd get it over with already, if that's really what you want, and then let me fucking go on my way."

He pauses but William's still laughing, and it's a sound Homelander hasn't heard before. William isn't faking it. He's actually in rollicking spirits after hearing this, probably because he doesn't believe him. Homelander is at a loss.

"Hurts to hear, I'm sure," he adds but his voice is getting smaller. Is there really nothing he can say to perturb this man?

William finally comes up for air from his convulsive laughing. "Mate... oh my god… Thanks for that, I haven't had that good of a laugh in years."

Homelander can't believe it, all that bitter venom roiling and unable to come up with anything more hurtful. "It's not my fault you're attracted to the man you keep accusing of raping your wife. That's fucked up, I must say," Homelander blurts out, desperate to find something to pique this man, and realizes he's found the magic topic.

He hears William approaching but can't move away before he's grabbed by the neck. "Oi, you fucking self-aggrandizing cunt. You mention Becca again, I dare you, I fucking dare you."

And Homelander opts not to say more even though this is what he wanted– contact, violent contact, and William losing his calm and maybe making mistakes in his rage. But he's out of ideas, and he hates how good it feels to be touched when he's had so little contact. His throat bobs under William's grip, and WIlliam releases him, as if somehow guessing that Homelander's getting something pleasant out of it and immediately depriving him of it.

"And you can tell all that just from the way I smell, can you?" he asks, no longer laughing, but sounding unconvinced. Homelander knows what he senses. He shouldn't be surprised his captor's not aware of his own feelings and proclivities.

"I’ve smelled it plenty. You walk into a crowd of fans, there's always a bunch of mouthbreathers drooling over you. Women mostly, but some men too. But I must say William, I didn't see it coming from you."

"Well, it's rich coming from you," William says. "Getting all worked up every time I say you've behaved yourself, or threaten you with something real embarrassing."

Homelander bristles. "That has nothing to do with you," he mumbles. "Whataboutism," he adds vindictively.

"Maybe, but let me just demonstrate. I'll fucking upload a video of you on your knees in your cage, hovering over a bowl of milk, lapping it up like a little cat or whatever the fuck, ass up in the air."

Homelander can feel the color drain from his face, but unfortunately can also feel the instant reaction. He remembers when it happened. He was desperate for something to soothe his nerves. William served him the milk he asked for but made him get into an awkward humiliating position to drink it. Not like William didn't exude a whole cloud of lusting pheromones or whatever it is that Homelander senses. But apparently only he's the one being blamed for getting hard over strange things. 

"Least dignified thing I've ever seen in my life. I'll fucking do it. They can think that's your captivity footage from your overseas classified mission before you ended up 'dead.'"

There's nowhere to hide. Homelander hates it, but he knows his body responds. When he was growing up in the lab, the scolding over masturbation intertwined shame and arousal into a weird mixture in his mind until they were, if not always inseparable, still unfortunately concomitant.

"Yeah, you like being praised and humiliated, you fucking sick cunt." William sounds triumphant, even though none of this seems particularly relevant. Homelander's not attracted to him, at least. And as soon as that thought crosses Homelander's mind, another one follows closely on its heels, and he regrets it. It's so easy to imagine William sucking him off, and his body has been so desperate for release that the thought is suddenly very appealing.

"I'm not the one collecting footage on his phone," Homelander says, trying to sound angry to cover up how shaky he feels, and how obsessed he's immediately gotten with the idea of making William act on his stupid depraved wishes.

"Look at yourself. Your cock is right begging for it."

"Then touch it." Homelander blurts out without thinking, his cock already throbbing, his body so so hopeful that thinking about sex means it's going to happen. He's feeling so disoriented that he doesn't immediately comprehend that William really reached through the bars, really wrapped his calloused hand around his erection. It feels so blissfully wonderful when his hands starts to move that Homelander's moved to tears of gratitude. And yet just as the corners of his mouth turn up, lost in the pleasure of it all, the contact is gone.

"MOTHERFUCKER," Homelander pants. "You're a FUCKING sadist." He bucks his hips seeking contact with anything. He knows there's nothing around him that could really satisfy– he's tried countless times. "Please, William, please don't just..." Homelander can't even get the words out, before he feels the hand again, just one stingy touch this time, only making things worse.

"Fuck," Homelander practically sobs out. When he hears William recede from the cage, he realizes this is it, he's about to be abandoned again, and that he's only armed William with yet another form of torture against him. He moans and weeps, not caring about how pathetic it looks and sounds, not caring if William is filming him again, sick mind that he has. Homelander tries to rub his erection against the floor, jammed between the hard surface and his body, but it never cut it before, and apparently won't cut it now either.

Homelander is reeling with so much unfulfillment that he hardly notices that William leaves the room entirely. His ears finally perk up when he hears something coming from the room William sleeps in. He can't be sure but it sounds like masturbation.

I hope you're thinking of me while you're doing it, you stupid cruel savage, Homelander curses to himself. He's close to shouting it loud. He would, if he thought there was any chance William would come back and finish what he sadistically started.

Homelander has no cards left to play, no relevant secrets. He could try to bargain, information about Vought for … for what exactly? Handjobs? William wasn't going to let him go for anything, he knows that.

[cheetahspy]

Ledger!Joker x Diabetic Reader Headcanons

Warnings: Medical stuff, needles/injections (it’s not very descriptive though), slight NSFW mention (labeled at the bottom)

A/N: Heya! I’ve never posted something like this before haha…Kinda new to it and very nervous so don’t judge me too harshly. I actually write quite often but rarely post it, however I really wanna start trying to put my work out there more. Keyword try. 

Anyway, fun fact about me, I have T1 diabetes. I haven't seen anything about that with J so I decided to make my own headcanons and such :) Sooooo here’s that lol…enjoy??

You had been diagnosed with T1 diabetes three years ago. You hated it. The needles, the upkeep, the blood, the appointments. It’s scary, a living nightmare for you.

You were still in your…adjusting phase, and didn’t like talking about your diabetes to anyone. Joker was no exception

So, naturally, J took matters into his own hands and did his own research, learning as much as he could about diabetes (without you knowing, of course). How it works, the high and low blood sugar levels, how to manage it, he even figured out how the insulin pump that you have operates. 

You were shocked the day he offered to change the infusion set for you and knowing how to do so. He ignored you when you asked him how he knew.

You were hesitant but quick to give in and let him inject the cannula into your stomach. He hugged you from behind as he did so; you melted into his touch and your fears were comforted. From that day on you opened up more and more about your medical life to J and allowed his help. 

He enjoys being the one to inject the cannula and dexcom, however he still forces you to do it yourself at times, as to make sure you aren’t getting too used to being dependent on someone else. You’re a strong and brave bunny, he wants to remind you of that. 

He will tease you about your dexcom and infusion sets, saying you must be part machine. 

“I’m uh, still convinced you’re a cyborg.” “J!!”

He also forces you to stay on a healthy diet and keeps track of your sugar intake carefully. He’s definitely not a hypocrite. He rarely lets you eat junk food, even though you’re allowed to and tried explaining that to him

“The doctors told me it’s okay if I eat sugar now and then, as long as I have the insulin for it. It’s the sugary drinks I need to avoid more.” 

J doesn’t buy it, nor does he trust your doctor's input. “Mmm. Nuh uh. Can’T have my little bunny go falling into a coma, hm?” You know he’s just concerned about you (even if he’d never outright admit it), so overtime you stopped arguing with him and avoided junk food to ease his mind. Just don’t let him catch you eating it behind his back.

J absentmindedly fidgets with your insulin tube. Rubbing along it, flicking it around, twirling it around his finger, even constantly feeling the cannula end of it against your stomach as if to reassure himself you that it’s still on and doing its job. Don’t worry, he’s only accidentally ripped it out once or twice, and he certainly makes it up to you when that happens. 

Having a low, but forgot sugar to combat it? Not to worry! Joker keeps a juice box or two in his suit juuuust for you. He’s even stacked packages of juices in your pantry so you’ll have plenty. (Don’t ask whether he bought or stole them, you already know the answer)

The low blood sugar episodes hit you hard, but you’ve found curling up on J’s lap and cuddling against his chest while sipping on juice is very comforting. He’ll stroke your hair and rub your back, holding you closer whenever you shake and cry.

“Shhhh sh sh sh. It’s nothin’ you haven’t beaten before. It’ll pass, angel.” 

You hate looking at your stomach and seeing the previous holes and scars from constant injections. J will run his thumb over them and kiss each of them to comfort you. 

Whenever you have a headache or any symptoms, J will immediately interrogate you about your blood sugar level

“Not every pain I get is caused by my diabetes.”

“Shuuuuush. What’re levels right now? Let me uh, lemme see your pum-p. Give. Right. Now.” 

If you’re low on insulin and the pharmacist is late to sending you new vials, J will meet with them personally to have a little chat. 

He’ll then come home and plop the bag of new vials theatrically down on the counter. “Tadaaaa! More insulin for my sweet little sugar cube.”

“Oh, thank you J! Wow, they gave me a lot this time…” 

NSFW:

During the ✨devils tango✨, J will occasionally rip the cannula out by accident. He’ll immediately put a pin in your lovemaking session to get you a new one. Even if you insist you could go an hour or two without it, he’s not taking any chances. After all, where’s the fun in sex if your partner is dying from a seizure??

“J, I promise it’s okay! We don’t have to sto-”

“Now now gumdrop. I know you’re, heh, eager for me, but my patient needs her medicine first.” 

You’re grateful you don’t have to deal with your disability alone anymore. Who knew the Clown Prince of Crime could be such a good caretaker?

[vargaslovinghours]

Vargas Playlist Part II (Part I)

Honey I’m Home - GHOST

Final Chapter - Snake City

Empty - Boyinaband & Jaiden Animations

Beauty and the Beast - Disney (covered by Chase Holfelder)

I want you to want me - Cheap Trick (covered by Chase Holfelder)

Toxic - Britney Spears (covered by Casey Beeves)

Devil’s Backbone - The Civil Wars

Stand by You - Rachel Platten

Monster - KIRA (covered by Aruvn)

Kitchen Fork - Jack Conte

The Mind Electric - Miracle Musical

Manipulate - Nathan Sharp

(And more talking under the cut)

Honey I’m Home

Religious imagery and familial rejection and abuse ahoy! I’ve already doodled Scriabin with a moth chained to his hand (and Moth Edgar lol), but he obviously suits the spider just as well. The droning repetition suits Edgar too, especially since it’s centered around repression of thoughts and wants. That vivisection could be a lot of things, “Done by God for all to see” makes me tempted to pin it to Scriabin and Edgar’s separation.

Final Chapter

I mentioned briefly in my first set of tags that I liked this song for juuuust After Scriabin gets his own body. “For a second let’s forget and pretend” feels very much like how they want to act, they want to have what they had even though they never can again - “Never thought we’d come to an end” is the first line! Wanting to hold each other, like nothing happened; especially Edgar, but Scriabin too. I think it could pair well with You Can’t Live Like This as well, they’re trying so hard not to turn that page!

Empty

Like I said the first time I mentioned this song, I’m still a little conflicted including such a personal song, but there are so many weirdly appropriate lines that it feels unavoidable to add it to my list. Since it talks about a voice arriving, it lines up almost perfectly with their relationship before they started being weird about each other, terribly hate filled. “Fill up on water and shame” and “Convince myself I’m in control and it’s not all the voice that makes me sick” especially stick out to me, as well as “empty” as a theme, Edgar’s mindscape is so blank! (Also if you watch the behind the scenes, there’s red yarn which is weird :0)

Beauty and the Beast

Well that’s a bit obvious, isn’t it lol. I only really started to consider it because of the minor key though, the way the tone twists and shifts with the new notes and mixing, ah it’s lovely. I especially like the way “Barely even friends, then somebody bends unexpectedly” hits, they’re always surprising each other! Bittersweet and strange indeed.

I want you to want me

Yet more minor key covers, yay. I was originally going to tie this one to mainfic, most specifically Edgar’s desire to get home from work to see Scriabin heh, but now there’s some interesting new layers with Manual Override, especially Scriabin trying to convince Edgar and himself. Scriabin is Scriabin no matter what though, so he’s always going to push for what he wants, in every context!

Toxic

A bit on the nose perhaps ♪ I think my mind was wandering while I was thinking about Once Again and it landed just long enough on this song to desperately want to give it a relisten, and whoops ♪ For whatever reason, Edgar drinking from “the Devil’s cup” really stood out as a strong image to me, either from his visit to Hell or redirecting those feelings onto Scriabin. Somehow this version really gives the vibe of them fully permeating each other, hateful and desiring and hard to pick apart.

The Devil’s Backbone

On recommendation, I have indeed added this one to my personal playlist! I was surprised, I’m usually so picky with my music but I could not stop listening to it. It fits Edgar/Nny so well! That said, I can see Scriabin stealing a line as well now, “Somewhere between a hangman’s knot and three mouths to feed” with Edgar’s new life situation of Nny’s threat of death and living with Scriabin and Todd. The bridge is still completely Edgar tho, that absolute desperation is so good.

Stand By You

Ngl, I almost cried listening and recontextualizing this one, the line “If your wings are broken, borrow mine so yours can open” just- agh. Also they never got to walk through Hell together so it only half works but I’ll take it! Probably especially relevant to the final chapter of You Can’t Live Like This, their little discussion sitting on the floor, pledging their lives to each other again fdjsalkfdsf

Monster

I can’t but imagine a bouncy Scriabin gloating about how he was made, “Feed me your negativity, talk some more about me ♪” Too bad it’s Monster rather than Demon eh! “I see how you’re going crazy, always thinkin’ ‘bout me” works rather well too, there’s a lot of lines that suit him! He’s so insufferable haha. The bridge is quite good too, “It could’ve been so different between us, then you went and messed everything up.” He’s always blaming Edgar!

Kitchen Fork

I’ve wanted something of Jack Conte’s for a while now, there’s so much chaotic energy in all his songs. I feel like this one and Bloody Nose both really suit Violation, there’s a really lovely disjointed energy, though I think Kitchen Fork works more generally. “Wake from the scar” and “Save us from our own two heads” are both really great lines for Edgar especially, and the rising violins are so unnerving.

The Mind Electric

I drew to this one quite early but it wasn’t until I started thinking about it a bit harder that I realized just how well it works, especially with Diaryfic/Hospitalfic. Much like with Stay, I can imagine this one working well as an animatic, it’s all very evocative of imagery. Would Scriabin be the “Lord” or would the doctors? Hmm. “Doctor, I can’t tell if I’m not me” continues to be a great line for both of them.

Manipulate

Nate needs to stop with making literally every song so adaptable, I can’t keep giving away my heart like this. Another song that switches POV from verse to verse, starting with Edgar and then with Scriabin: “Find somebody else to call your home.” “You stab me in the back and then you make demands! You say it’s only you? I got another plan.” “Maybe you could torture someone else.” “Maybe I don’t have the strength to follow you Hell.” I cry okay. I can’t just list all the lyrics, they’re all too good.

[purplecatghostposts]

If you're still doing the song writing ask thing,,, could I ask for frenmy(or as others call it,, frenreylatta) with 1 or 24? 👉👈 Or just frenmy in general I will appreciate and holde whatever

CANNNN do!!

(Also I’m juuuust now realizing these are song titles I just saw one word and went ‘LETS WRITE A DRABBLE OFF OF THIS’ oops- uh enjoy either way!)

—

For better or for worse, Tommy isn’t always taken completely seriously.

Which is fine. Tommy can brush it off, he might have some “Childish Interests” but he’s a grown adult, he can take a hit or two.

(Tommy doesn’t know why anything has to regarded as childish when anyone can and should enjoy anything and not get shit for it but that’s a whole other can of worms).

But when Tommy says things like, “Grab a soda, it’ll help you see faster!” Nobody thinks twice about it. Which is good, because Tommy didn’t mean to say it at all. There’s certain things Tommy doesn’t like to talk about and his more ‘Inhuman’ attributes is one of them.

Son of “The G-Man” has a few perks after all.

The ability to make his eyes glow and see in the dark, the ability to create- both living and non living things, immortality and the ability to share it with something like a dog he created with his own two hands, and most of all, a connection to Time itself.

Tommy has all of these abilities under control, except for the very latter of the bunch. Because turning on and off your eyes like a flashlight is something he’s been doing as a kid; Immortality he was born with, sharing it came to him in his late twenties; and while difficult, Tommy now has a bit of a knack for creation; but Time? Time is something else entirely. It’s its own entity, and not even his father has much control over it.

And of course, with a difficult entity like Time, Tommy got saddled with the worst ability to have little control over. His father, G-Man, can freeze, suspend, and even travel through it. Tommy can see it, and Time shows him too much.

Tommy does not dream, he Sees. The branches of time are shown right before his eyes whether he likes it or not, and possibilities are laid out. Time is not set in stone- there’s millions of timelines and ways it could go- and when he sleeps, Tommy can see them.

There’s no physical way to stop it without fully mastering it, but Tommy has found that there’s a few things that can make it more pleasant or at the very least, bearable. Low stress or going to sleep happy and content means he usually sees happier timelines. Caffeine, for whatever reason, means that when he sees timelines, it’s at a speed where he doesn’t have to comprehend anything or have to see something he doesn’t want to see. So far, it’s the only two methods he knows, and since he can’t always control how stressful his situation is, Tommy turns to soda.

He means what he says. Soda helps him see faster. He’s just glad that he doesn’t have to explain it to Gordon. His inhuman attributes used to scare other kids off when he was younger, and he knows that Gordon is an adult like him and probably won’t run, but the fear runs deep and Tommy keeps his mouth shut.

Benrey knows, of course. He’s not human either, he understood. But even when Tommy has bad dreams, he doesn’t like to bother other people about it. They’re just dreams, he can handle them.

Until they get personal.

Tommy has been seeing dreams about how it could end for them in Black Mesa for days now, but his intake in soda means he doesn’t really process them. They pass by in a flash and Tommy wakes up and promptly forgets about whatever was shown to him.

But of course, his luck runs out.

Tommy’s leg bounces anxiously as he stares at the broken vending machine. Nothing but water- no caffeine. Water is good for survival- Gordon gulps it down greedily then gawks when Benrey eats the whole bottle in one bite making Tommy laugh- but it means Tommy’s at risk for bad visions. And with the stress of soldiers starting to come at them as well as aliens, he suspects that tonight will not end well.

There’s a tug at his sleeve. Tommy glances down to meet Benrey’s eyes, who studies him silently. He knows something’s up- of course he does- but Tommy smiles like there’s nothing to worry about. Benrey won’t confront him directly- not unless he’s certain it’s really bad- but he has a feeling that Benrey’s still going to try something in his own little way.

“Getting late.” Gordon comments, rubbing his eyes. “We should probably get some rest.”

“Baby Feetman wants a nap?” Benrey grins lazily. Gordon rolls his eyes in response, but doesn’t look all that annoyed. He’s more relaxed than usual, looking less like he’s a twig about to snap and more a river who’s just going with the flow. In fact, Tommy swears Gordon smiles for a second.

“Shut up, you got dark circles under your eyes. You could use it too.”

Benrey rolls his eyes. “Haven’t slept this entire time, don’t intent to start now.”

Both Tommy and Gordon’s attention snaps to him. Benrey almost shrinks under the spotlight, looking utterly confused. “Uh... Care to fill a bro in on what I said wrong..?”

“You haven’t slept?” Gordon’s voice raises.

“Benrey, that’s not good for your health!”

“Jeez fuck- I don’t need to sleep to live, guys.” Benrey cuts in. “Not like you guys. Besides, someone’s gotta keep watch so like, I don’t sleep. S’not a big deal.”

“Benrey, you- you told me that half of your energy to use your abilities comes from sleep.” Tommy says slowly.

“Yeah, and the other half is food. What of it?”

Gordon joins in. “We’ve gotten the bare scraps of food down here. You- you have to be running on empty.”

“Don’t worry about it, Bro-”

“No!” Both Tommy and Gordon shout simultaneously.

Benrey jumps, eyes darting between the two of them and rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh, this isn’t fair, you’re tag teaming me, I deserve someone on my team.”

Dr. Coomer pokes his head from around the corner, Bubby following. “Is something wrong? We heard some shouting!”

“Hey, Coomer, Bubs, you uh, you gotta back me up, they’re bullying me.” Benrey points accusingly at Tommy and Gordon respectively.

Bubby shrugs. “Just do what I did whenever someone bullied me.”

“Somehow I feel like this is going to be bad advice...” Gordon mumbles.

“Set them on fire.”

“Andddd I was right.”

Benrey pretends to consider it for a moment. Gordon rolls his eyes at him, earning a smile from Benrey. “But uh, these two keep yelling at me because I haven’t slept. Tell them to stop.”

Dr. Coomer frowns and Bubby narrows his eyes. Tommy snickers to himself, knowing Benrey isn’t winning this battle.

“You haven’t slept? What the hell do you think you’re doing? Fucking dumbass.”

“Benrey, sleep is an important function we all need to live!”

Benrey groans into his hands. Gordon grins cockily. “Hey, Bubby, Dr. Coomer, mind taking watch tonight while Tommy and I get Benrey to sleep?”

Bubby snorts like it’s obvious. Coomer smiles brightly and nods. “Of course! If anyone tries to come after you in your sleep, we’ll take care of them, if you know what I mean.” Coomer winks, then makes a punching gesture.

Gordon laughs at that. Tommy rather likes when Gordon laughs, his whole body moves with him. It’s wholehearted and genuine and if it were possible, Tommy would love to bottle it and keep it with him.

Tommy’s fully aware that he’s rather smitten with Gordon and Benrey. Benrey’s his best friend and Tommy is fine if it stayed that way, but he’s also felt a certain romantic fondness for him too. Benrey’s not easy to decipher but Tommy has learned he shows he cares in the subtle ways. How Benrey learns to read people and distracts them when they feel down. He’s done it to Tommy himself, and recently, he’s seen a very similar sentiment towards Gordon.

And Gordon wears his heart on his sleeve, which is endearing on its own. Tommy sees the way he acts around Benrey and around himself, and he can’t help but wonder if Gordon might feel the same way he does.

They find a place to camp out and before he knows it, Tommy has Gordon on one side and Benrey on the other. Despite lying on the concrete ground, Tommy doesn’t think he’s ever felt more comfortable in his life. Benrey’s curled up next to him and Gordon is lying on his side with an arm over him and Tommy feels himself get lulled to sleep. He doesn’t want to ever move again.

His dreams are not as kind as his situation. Because Tommy Sees all possible timelines, and one too many of them involve two of the people he cares about most in the world.

Benrey betrays Gordon and gets his hand get cut off. Gordon betrays Benrey and Benrey comes back not looking quite right. Gordon lets Benrey die, Benrey lets Gordon die, Benrey stands on an alien planet and attempts to kill everyone- does kill everyone. Gordon stands on an alien planet and sees Benrey being the thing they have to kill and he doesn’t hesitate.

They tear each other apart, no matter what Tommy says or does. And in a few timelines, their rage is directed towards him, and Tommy’s heart breaks into two.

“Tommy? Tommy, bro, c’mon, you gotta wake up.”

Benrey’s voice pulls him out of it. Tommy sits up, trembling and reaching out blindly. His vision is blurred and all attempts to speak come out as quiet sobs. A pair of hands grab onto his while a second gently touches his shoulder, grounding him to reality.

“Benrey?” It’s deathly quiet but it’s unmistakably Gordon’s. “Benrey- his eyes- is he okay? They’re- they’re gold-!”

“I know, dude, this happens sometimes, he’ll be okay.” Benrey responds, shockingly calm. “Tommy sees bad things sometimes when he goes to sleep and sometimes they’re overwhelming and this happens. Just... Trust me and follow my lead on this?”

A beat. Tommy tries to wipe his eyes but tears keep streaming down his face.

“Okay. I trust you.”

Tommy can’t see but he has a feeling Benrey is smiling a little at that.

Benrey and Gordon both begin to whisper reassurances and ask him what he can feel around him. They talk and talk and talk until eventually, Tommy can finally see them again and the anxiety in his chest is manageable.

“Thank you...” Tommy gives them a weak smile.

“Bad visions?” Benrey guesses. Gordon looks mildly confused but doesn’t ask questions. Tommy nods in response. “You... Wanna share or nah?”

Tommy’s gaze lowers. He sucks in a small breath. “It- it was a lot of bad timelines with you two. And I-...” He hesitated for just a minute but thinking of the timelines again made him push through it. “And I really care about both of you. A lot. In- in a platonic as well as a... A romantic way.”

Silence. Tommy swallowed thickly, not wanting to look at either of them and unsure if he made the wrong choice to tell them or not.

“Oh thank god, I’m not the only one.” Gordon blurted out. He let out a long breath, laughing softly. “I was- fuck, I was really struggling there.”

Benrey cracked a smile. “Cringe Gordon can’t deal with gay feelings? How embarrassing for you. Can’t believe I have gay thoughts for such a loser.” His eyes turn to Tommy and his smile grew. “I guess having gay thoughts for a really cool guy balances it out so it’s chill.”

Tommy couldn’t stop smiling. Was this really happening? Were they really all just on the same page? “R-really?”

Benrey shrugs. “‘M kinda surprised, thought I was obvious.”

“You’re not obvious with anything.” Gordon tells him, rolling his eyes but relaxing his shoulders.

“I...” Tommy let out a laugh. “I- I really care about you both! And- and after we get out of Black Mesa... I want us to stay this close.”

Benrey nodded. “‘Course we will. You’re some of my best bros and how else would I kiss you both goodnight like all bros should?”

Gordon snickered, then cleared his throat. “Hey uh... Have we all just been holding this in the entire time even though we all felt the same-!”

“YES.” Bubby screaming from across the room made all three jump in surprise. Bubby and Coomer were both sitting by the door, Bubby wrapped in Coomer’s arms but he still scowled at the three of them. “You’ve all been pining like a bunch of fucking idiots. Just ask a guy out by setting half a building on fire like a regular person!”

Tommy looked back at the other two and laughed to himself. Soon enough, the three of them were laying down again but this time, Tommy wrapped his arms around one each and held them close to him. In the morning, they could talk more about the three of them and their newly forming relationship, but for now, they deserved to rest.

Gordon’s head rested against Tommy’s shoulder while Benrey clung to him. Tommy felt his eyes get heavier and heavier but he wasn’t as afraid of getting a bad vision. Partly because he had two of the most important people in his life in his arms and he knew that those futures wouldn’t be his, but also partly because even if the visions did get to him, he had support when he woke up.

His own personal paradise. There was a light at the end of the tunnel and Tommy knew that by the end of this, he wanted both of them by his side and in his life for a long time.

—

I don’t know why this turned into a Tommy Lore/Angst Fest BUT hopefully it turned out alright! I hope you liked it! These three are veryyyy soft and it was sure fun to write! Feel free to send in another request if you want!

[jokertrap-ran]

(少女的王座—The Throne of Girl—) Main Story: Chapter 1 Part 10 English Translation

*The Throne of Girl Masterlist. *Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut! *Main Story will be tagged under #Throne of Main

Chapter 1-1 / 1-2 / 1-3 / 1-3B / 1-4 / 1-5 / 1-6 / 1-7 / 1-8 / 1-9 / 1-10 / 1-11 / 1-12 / 1-13

Phone Call from Adrian / Lancelot

I groggily woke up from my sleep in the morning. The bright light from outside filtered through the windows into the room; everything was peaceful and quiet.

MC: Doesn't seem like there are any maids here to wake me up today...

I glanced at the time, ducking my head back under the soft covers.

MC: I feel like there aren't going to be any social events today, so I can sleep in…

Just as I closed my eyes, preparing to return to sleep for a second time, my phone suddenly rang.

MC: …Ugh… Why is someone calling me all so early in the morning?

Snatching up my phone a little reluctantly, I forced my eyes open; my drowsiness dying off real quick when I saw just who was requesting for a video call with me.

MC: ...Alex?

Alex Pepsilia was my younger brother, and the youngest child of the family.

MC: (Pepsilia and Hubrigy have a 4 hour time difference.)

MC: (It's 7AM here now, which means that it's only 3AM over there, right?)

MC: Unless he hasn't slept at all?

I sat up and rubbed my eyes, pressing the answer button.

⊹ ˚✩ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ✩˚ ⊹

Alex: I just knew that you were sleeping in, sis!

MC: Sleeping in is a right that god has bestowed upon us!

Alex: Such a thing didn't exist in the Church's teachings...

MC: Huh… You mean, even God hasn’t said anything like “Make sure to get a good rest everyday and get enough sleep”? Surely there must be something along those lines!

Alex: ... Wasn't it "God's blessing allowed us rest on every seventh day of the week"?

MC: ...Doesn't it mean the same thing?

Alex: No way! They're completely different!

[Alex had been sent to the Vatican to live there for a while, due to his frail and sickly constitution, to pray for God's blessing while he received treatment from the Holy See.]

[And he had become more devout to God upon his consequent return.]

MC: Fine… You’ve caught me red-handed.

MC: But I’ve also found out that you’re still not asleep despite it being 3 in the morning!

MC: Shall I… Tell Father and Brother about this matter?

Alex: !!!

Alex: Sis…

MC: Juuuust joking!

MC: Still, it’s so late; why aren’t you asleep?

Alex: I couldn't fall asleep…

Alex: I mean, Father, Brother, you, and even brother Albert went all the way to the Royal Palace in Hubrigy; and in the only one being left behind... 

Alex: The Castle is so big and empty, and no one pays me any mind… There's no way I'll be able to sleep like this!

Alex: Hey sis? When will you be coming back?

MC: I’ve still got to stay here for about another month!

MC: Haa… I want to go home too...

MC: This Palace has such an overwhelming number of rules; I wouldn’t stay here for another day if I could help it!

MC: But it’s currently the Capital’s Social Season, so Brother has been forcing me to participate in Tea Parties, Balls, blah, blah...

MC: He said that he just wanted me to make acquaintances with more royals. Humph! They’re just forcing me to participate in “Blind Dates”, if I had to be blunt about it!

Alex: Ehh!? Then... Do you have anyone you fancy, sis? 

MC: Not. A. Single. One!

Alex: Really? Thank God!

Alex: —Ahem! I mean, hurry and come on back if there isn't anyone you fancy over there!

MC: I have no common topic with them at all. They all either have their eyes growing on the top of their heads or talk about extremely boring things!

Alex: That's right! There's no way those people will ever be worthy of you, sis!

Alex: Hurry and come back sis! You can just live with me just as we've always done, right?

MC: If only Brother was of the same mind as you...

Alex: It'll be fine! Just leave brother Lancelot to me.

Alex: I'll make sure to convince him not to set you up for any "Blind Dates"!

MC: Really?

MC: It would be greatly appreciated if you can persuade Brother to stop dragging me off to these “Blind Dates”!

Alex: Yup! I'll send a message to him in the afternoon saying, "Looks like sis doesn't like aaanyone at all, so hurry and let her come home already"!

MC: Alex… I now stand firm in my belief that you’re the only one who relates to me best in the family!

MC: Even Albert came along with us to the Royal Palace… Only for him to be on the same mindset as Brother, himself! He’s not helping me anymore!

Alex: What? Even brother Albert? Even him…

Alex: I'm sure he must have been coerced by Father and brother Lancelot! Yeah; I'm sure he was!

Alex: Don't blame brother Albert for it, sis...

MC: You’re not wrong… But...

[I sighed. Alex was right. Brother and father must have specially instructed Albert one way or another for him to be so "respectful" of the rules in the Royal Palace."]

Alex: Anyway, just leave brother Lancelot to me and don't worry about it!

Alex: By the way, how's the Royal Palace? It must be way different from Pepsilia, right? Have you gotten used to the place yet?

MC: It’s really very different here. The Capital of Hubrigy is known as the “Heart of the Empire”; and it really deserves its reputation, for it’s way more prosperous compared to us!

MC: I hear that this place houses the largest Amusement Park and Zoo in the entire continent! Not to mention the famous Aquarium which is said to have every single species of marine life on this entire planet!

MC: There are also many delicious street food, gourmet stores, free markets and so on and so forth… Oh yeah! I think there was also a particularly popular Circus around here...

Alex: Ooooo!! Sounds like there are lots of interesting and yummy things there!

Alex: Sis, I… I wanted to go along with you…

MC: Don't worry! There'll be another chance next time!

[Even though I say that… I'm aware that he's always been of frail health…]

[Let's not even mention anything about him coming together with us to Hubrigy; even normal plans for a short trip out always ended as that. Just a plan.]

[The only time he had a successful long-distance trip elsewhere was only after we went to the Vatican and visited the Holy See, to pray for god’s blessing to see the trip through successfully.]

[I looked at the time and saw that it was getting later and later. It was nearing 4AM back in Pepsilia—]

▷Choice: Chat longer with him

MC: Let’s wait for your health to get better, and for you to get stronger. Then, you can come here with me and enjoy yourself as much as you want; how does that sound?

Alex: Sure, sounds great!! It's a promise then! When that time comes… Yes, let's go there together with only us two!

Alex: Let's skip all those boring social events! I'm sure we'll be able to play to our heart's content with just the two of us!

MC: Uwah, hearing you say that makes me a little impatient for that time to come; I can’t wait…!

Alex: Don't worry about it, sis! I won't make you wait long!

MC: Aw, how sweet of you, Alex!

▷Choice: Persuade Alex to go to bed.

MC: But it’s almost 4AM; it’s not good for your health to be up so late!

Alex: I...

Alex: I… want to talk with you a little longer, sis...

MC: You can’t. I’ll be very worried if you don’t hurry and sleep soon...

Alex: ...Alright...

Alex: I'm gonna prepare for bed then. How about you go outside for a change if you're free?

MC: Yeah! I happen to be free later, so I’m absolutely prepared to sneak out and go fishing.

MC: I hear that the Capital is home to a species of fish that can spit out precious chromatic beads, so I’m thinking of trying my luck.

MC: The people here use them as amulets! Rest assured, for this sister of yours is blessed with super good luck! I’ll definitely be able to show it to you!

Alex: I think I've read about that fish in one of the books on the Church's library. I recall that it's pretty hard to catch, and if it proves to be too much trouble for you, then maybe…

MC: Don’t worry, something as simple as fishing won’t pose a problem for me at all! I’m going off to fish now, and as for you~ Hurry and go to sleep!

Alex: Alright, sis!

⊹ ˚✩ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ✩˚ ⊹

Having said that, I waved at Alex through the video call before cutting the line.

MC: (I should change and head out.)

I put the phone in my hand down, hurriedly getting out of bed to wash up and change into a fresh set of clothes.

⊹ ˚✩ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ ✩˚ ⊹

MC: (It’s such a rare occasion to be able to go take a breather outside. I should ask Albert to come along with me while I’m at it!)

I stopped in front of Albert’s room, knocking on his door.

MC: Albert!

MC: ...Albert?

I knocked on the door, but it was unexpectedly quiet within the room.

MC: (Hm? What’s going on? Unless… Did he go somewhere?)

MC: (Where did he go off to so early in the morning? Unless Father of Brother needed him for something?)

MC: (Oh well, it’s just fishing; I can go alone.)

⊹ ˚✩ ━━━━━━━ ∘◦ ♔What’s past, it’s prologue♔ ◦∘ ━━━━━━━ ✩˚ ⊹

Previous Part: (Chapter 1-9) | Next Part: (Chapter 1-11)

[taeyongbestboi]

♡ Four Pink Cheeks //// ♡

Pairing: dancer!jeno x dancer!reader

Genre: fluffffffff!!!!

Synopsis:

You and Jeno have been best friends since both of you were delivered to this world, so you guys are basically attached to the hip. Both of you love dancing and made a great dance duo (and by great I mean amazingly awesome geniuses to be exact).

What would happen next, when the routine you both need to dance requires a gesture a bit more friendly than being friends?

Word count: 1.4k ♡

Warnings: none

Author’s note:

This is the firstttttt ever fic I’ve written that I published (or posted on the internet, whatever you wanna call it), so there’ll be grammatical and spelling errors and since English isn’t my native language and I am still a rookie, self-taught fic writer, I ask you guys to be soft on me (teeheee :D). I know my writing techniques are still far from good, so that’s why I ask you guys to please help me improve and give this fic some love on the way ♡ ☾ ☆

Song based:

—

It’s the night before your evaluation day. You and Jeno decided to join a dance company right after you both finished high school, so here are both of you, practicing your duet routine for the company’s evaluation tomorrow.

“It’s been 6 months and I’m still feeling nauseous...”, you said

Jeno chuckled, “don’t be nervous... it’s just another evaluation. Not a thing we can’t handle.”

True, you both are the best dance duo in the company. Your chemistry’s out of this world. Maybe it’s because you’ve been best friends with Jeno for ages now and also have been each other’s dance partner for quite some time.

Your dance journey with Jeno started when he initiated to create a youtube channel to showcase his dance. And instead of doing it alone, he asked you to be his dance partner as he knows how great your potential in dance were. It all happened just like that.

“Let’s try it one more time, shall we?”

You nod at Jeno, got to your feet and make yourself ready to dance another round of the routine. But before any of you could move to the song, there’s a knock on the door and your coach’s head popped out from behind the door afterwards.

“Still practicing eh, kids?”

You guys gave a slight bow. “Yeah, coach. Would you mind watch our routine and give advices for tomorrow’s evaluation?”, Jeno asked politely

“Alright, let me see it one last time. From the snippets that I saw, you guys are doing such great job though...”, the coach smiled at both of you

“Okay, let’s start.”

With the cue, Jeno got the music start and went to his place in a swift move. Right after the music starts playing, you and Jeno instantly move both of your bodies gracefully.

Contemporary dance is a genre that requires swiftness and ability to express deep emotions. Let alone doing a deux, doing it alone has never been that simple. This routine of yours and Jeno was based on one of Lauv’s genius piece, Enemies. The song’s melody, lyrics and overall vibe should’ve been enough to explain the whole concept. Yes, it was a bout a pair of lovers whom turned into enemies, at one point in their lives. Here, you have to position yourself as Jeno’s source of heartbreak and vice versa.

The routine you both made was indeed intense. With all those emotions indulged in that piece, and this concept you both had in mind that you guys wanted tomorrow stage’s costume to be as simple as possible, requiring you guys to act (no, scratch that), dive into the deux’s role as seamless as possible. You guys have to literally become enemies whom still unable to let go of the affection towards each other that it hurts both of you, for tomorrow’s stage in order to amaze the evaluator.

The music has just hit the last chorus of the song, making the intense choreo became even more tense. Lots of yanking, hair and clothes pulling (limbs as well), flying an throwing here and there, frustrated mimics. Then, the music came to an end and you pull your loose practice t-shirt with your left hand by the collar, while doing a move as if you’re trying to approach Jeno who’s standing on the other side, making it as if someone else’s preventing, holding you back from getting to Jeno.

The music ends, and so was the routine. Both you panted and the coach gave a satisfying clap. And then you and Jeno bowed to the coach, as a form of gratitude.

“As expected, you guys did a wonderful job on your routine...”

Both of you smiled at the compliment

“...but,” the coach continues

“you guys could actually elevate the tense even more, you know? Make it even more spicy...”, he said

You and Jeno exchanged looks. What was he talking about again? You guys telepathily thought.

“How about... you guys kiss in the middle of the routine?”

“YES???”, both of you exclaimed

“Yeah, like... the concept was a whole story of lovers turn to enemies right? The song itself holds a great amount of angst, bring it to the rim guys...”

“But, we’ve just turned 19...”, you pointed out

“Well, you guys are legal already. It doesn’t have to be overly dramatic, just a fast-yet-proper kiss on the lips would do. It’ll elevate the expression of lingering affection between you two even when you both had became enemies...”, the coach suggested even more

Again, you and Jeno turn to look at each other’s eyes, only to blush miserably.

“Alright, coach. We’ll try to add that act to our routine...”, Jeno finally said

You turn your head to him with eyes as big as lollipops, you thought you heard wrong.

“Alright! Do it bravely y/n, Jeno. Keep up the good work!”, the coach stand up, “I think I have to go now. Finish the practice quickly and have some rest. Wish you guys best for tomorrow...”, with that, he smiled and left.

The door clicked close, and you turned to Jeno with a puzzled, defeated look on your face. How are you guys supposed to do that thing???

“Y/n, it’s for the sake of our performance...”

You sighed, body dropped to the wooden floor of the practice room, legs outward, both of your arms propping your body. Your head hung low.

“Well first of all, we’re best friends, Jeno. More, a dance partner for each other. We’ve done crazy, ridiculous things together both for the sake of our routines and not. I have nothing against the idea of kissing you, really...”, you confessed

Jeno decided to join you sitting on the floor. Legs crossed.

“But the thing is I haven’t kissed anyone my whole life...”, you admitted

Jeno looked a bit surprised. He can feel heat sensation creeping from his fingertips to his ears.

“Y/n...”

“Yeah?”

“So do I...”

You feel the exact same sensation as Jeno. Little do you both know, you both turned into a blushing mess right there, right then. You look at the other direction of his face, but from the corner your eye you can see him fidgeting his fingers.

“Umm... is that mean that we’ll be having our firsts...”, you stopped

“... with each other?”

“I-I guess so...”

Did you just catch Jeno stuttering???

You took a deep breath and throw it all out in a loud, heavy sigh.

“Okay then, we agreed to take this challenge right??”, you asked Jeno. He nodded innocently.

“How are we supposed to start it?”, your voice became a little bit softer on the end of the sentence.

“Ehm...”, Jeno cleared his throat, “why don’t we try it once?”, his head was hung low, now his eyes looking at you with a small lift on his chin.

“Yes???”

“Can I kiss you?”, Jeno asked softly yet firmly.

The thought of Jeno kissing you??? Okay he did not have to go all firm like that while asking you that question! Not gonna lie, it did made your heart beats 1000x faster.

“Uh...okay...”, you replied

You swore to God, you can feel your face so hot right now. Bet you looked like a boiled shrimp.

“Stay still, don’t laugh.” Jeno warned

He leaned in, right palm pressed on the floor right besides your left hand that’s propping your body, right arm holding his body’s weight, crossed legs broke out as he lean closer and closer. His brown iris fixed on yours, then your balmed, plump lip. You feel your eyes shutting down, eyelashes batting a few flustered blinks, eyes focused on his lips before completely shutting down. The second your eyes closed, you feel his lips touch yours.

You pursed your lips close together, eyebrows slightly sewed together, tensing on the sensation of your lips’ first encounter with another lips. Jeno, on the other hand, were surprisingly calm and settled. A few seconds in and you started to relax a bit. His lips waited patiently on yours.

The moment you loosen up, he slightly parted his lips, juuuust a bit, to press down your lips between his as he deepened the kiss. His gesture made your lips pucker and move swiftly along his lips. His left hand’s reaching for your cheek, thumb finding its way to rub the corner of your lips.

And after a not-so-brief moment, you guys break free, nose touching each other’s side, eyes fluttering open. Jeno’s hand was still resting on your cheek, not a limb dared to move away.

A pair of laugh broke. Having to process and inhale the fact that both of you just kissed your best friends. An interesting experience, really.

With four pink cheeks, a pair of shy laughters, limbs still scattered on the practice room’s floor, Jeno asked...

“Let’s go practice, shall we?”

[maxrev]

OTP Asks - I'm going to be lazy and ask for all of your boys for the following questions: 1, 7, 10, 17, 22, 36, 43. Thank you!

Putting me through my paces here lol. Whew....Thanks though, this was fun! 

From this list here

1. Who wakes up first?

Knox x Kaidan - Knox. He doesn’t sleep much to begin with, so is always up before Kaidan. He can’t understand how someone who is such a stickler for rules, can’t drag himself out of bed an hour before his alarm lol

John x Kaidan - neither. They both roll out of bed around the same time xD

Jon x Kaidan - Jon but primarily because he’s such a light sleeper and often gets up to watch the sun rise over the water on the beach. It’s his favorite part of the day. 

Niall x Kaidan - Kaidan lol. Niall gives Kaidan a run for his money when it comes to sleeping in. He’s a night owl and stays up late at night. He says he does his best work (winks at Kaidan) at night O.o

7. Who comes up with the cheesy pick-up lines?

Knox x Kaidan - definitely Kaidan. Takes Knox forever to realize he even has feelings for Kaidan, then to even act on them. The pickup lines aren’t cheesy on purpose, it’s just Kaidan being...shy and awkward!

John x Kaidan - John without a doubt. In fact, he purposely comes up with THE cheesiest he can think of in order to make Kaidan blush, the crew roll their eyes, and everyone take bets as to what he’ll come up with next ;) His top used one is ‘come here often’ when he ends up in the same place as Kaidan on the ship. The crew mouth the line behind his back because they always know it’s coming!

Jon x Kaidan - hmmm, not sure on this one. Tbh, probably Kaidan just to get a laugh out of Jon as he tends to be too serious at times. 

Niall x Kaidan - Niall for sure. Kaidan has a few but Niall beats him every time for sheer cheesiness and ridiculousness. It’s a point of pride with Niall after a while lol

10. Who sets the other’s ringtone to something loud and obnoxious behind their back?

Knox x Kaidan - neither. Kaidan knows better, so he’s never bothered to try. Knox doesn’t do ringtones. 

John x Kaidan - equal. John loves to drive Kaidan nuts this way. Usually, it’s some truly obnoxious rock music, heavy or classic, or something from a very old sitcom, John finds hilarious but Kaidan doesn’t. So, in retaliation, Kaidan will find something he can get back at John with, usually with Joker’s help!

Jon x Kaidan - Kaidan likes to shake things up for Jon and often it’s something Jack has picked out, so it’s super loud and obnoxious xD

Niall x Kaidan - Oh, Niall for sure. It’s always something to do with bagpipes and loud drums ;)

17. Who carries all the important documents while traveling?

Knox x Kaidan - Knox. Kaidan tries but Knox is uber organized and will NOT relinquish control. 

John x Kaidan - Kaidan. John could care less and Kaidan even goes behind him and makes sure he’s packed everything he needs. More than once, he’s left something important behind. 

Jon x Kaidan - Equal. They’re both pretty on top of things when travelling, so it’s usually whoever scheduled the trip. 

Niall x Kaidan - Niall will deny he’s not organized enough but Kaidan knows better. To make things go smoothly, he gets to the documents they need beforehand just so everything is ready to go and there’s no mix-ups. In fact, he usually puts them somewhere Niall can’t find them just so he doesn’t get his hands on them!

22. Who texts more often?

Knox x Kaidan - Kaidan! He tries not to smother because Knox hates it but it’s a very fine line. Knox is just...busy and forgets. Also, he just doesn’t see the point in it. 

John x Kaidan - Oh John without a doubt. (I have a...lot of ideas for this) But yeah, silly one liners, ridiculous sayings, anything mundane that pops into his head. Kaidan gets it ALL. 

Jon x Kaidan - Fairly equal, though there are times Jon goes dark and then Kaidan worries. 

Niall x Kaidan - close but I think Niall edges him out...juuuust a bit. 

36. Which one is the secret snuggler?

Well, to me, Kaidan is a snuggler in general, so not really secret in any pairing of mine! 

Knox x Kaidan - Surprising no one...Knox! He is the big spoon and on the rare occasions Kaidan wakes up first, it’s to find Knox wrapped around him. He doesn’t do it consciously and only when he’s completely zonked out. He denies it when Kaidan tells him lol

John x Kaidan - equal snugglers. Touch is comforting to them both and John likes wrapping his arms around Kaidan...and his legs…and draping his body over him xD

Jon x Kaidan - Jon is still processing having someone touch him, so definitely Kaidan when Jon feels up to it. 

Niall x Kaidan - Niall because at first, he just kinda flops around the bed, kicks Kaidan a lot when they start sleeping together, hits him over the head. Niall is a bed hog lol. But overtime, he gravitates to the touch of skin on skin, the safety and security of Kaidan and his warmth, though Niall isn’t exactly cold. 

43. What is the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Knox x Kaidan - ooooo. So, Knox is kinda poleaxed on Horizon when he hears Kaidan’s voice, then sees him...then devastated when he walks away. Sure, he gets it and would do the same. Just takes him by surprise to feel that way. Knox wants to be a better person for Kaidan and begins to change in little ways, begins to think WWKD, in many situations - even if he doesn’t always change how he tackles a problem. At least, not right away. 

Kaidan tries to get to know the man behind the mask, understand him better, see why he makes the choices he does and meet him halfway in how they process their decisions. 

John x Kaidan - I think they realize it right away at the book store, so John’s just...relentless in his pursuit but still never pushes. Kaidan has to come to him. For Kaidan, he stops...running away. 

Jon x Kaidan - Jon tries to sabotage any budding feelings the minute he realizes he has them. His self hate is very real, very up front and center and it leads him down a dark path. Thankfully, Kaidan is endlessly patient and understanding, so when they’re finally on the same page, it’s awkward but ultimately healing and chock full of feels. 

Niall x Kaidan - Niall is oblivious for a long time. Kaidan knows he has feelings but refuses to act on them. Think...slooooow burn here. But, when they both realize it and quit circling around each other and missing the mark, they are in complete tandem and their dance is beautiful to behold. 

[scandinaviacroatiaengbergs]

Saturday: Running, Walking, Crepe-ing

[There are some photos from this day, and the Hensinki Central Library, if you scroll a few posts below.]

On Saturday morning, Rowan woke up at 5:00 a.m., which was, of course, not ideal.  I tried to get  him to stay in bed for a while but after a time, I gave up and told him he could play in the living room, if he was silent. That was also the morning that Eric was intending to run the Helsinki half-marathon, if he’d had a good night’s sleep.  Well, he didn’t either, but he did get up at 7 a.m. and Rowan was still out in the living room, playing! He made some really interesting drawings and a list of the places he wanted to go that day.  In kindergarten, they practice “brave spelling,” and I tell you, some of the spellings on the list were braaaave.  He did want to go to the zoo, the aquarium, and the amusement park.   We didn’t end up going to any of those, since we do plan to go to Tivoli Gardens in Copenhagen and the amusement park there, maybe. Rowan did do a pretty good job of playing quietly, honestly, until maybe 8 a.m. (when Cece was still sleeping), when he was playing with some magnetic blocks on the glass coffee table. So, Eric did not end up running the half-marathon, but he did go on an 11.5-mile run – so he basically could’ve done it!  After he got back to the apartment, we did all go out and we walked down to Finlandia Hall, which is where the race ended.  As I mentioned, the weather has been very hot, so much so that the Finnish weather service had an alert for heat danger.  And you know, I thought that was kind of funny at first, but then I also started to worry about the Finns who were running that half-marathon in weather much hotter than they were used to.  They was a really great turnout for the race, but we did actually see someone being carried off by the paramedics juuuust before the finish – poor guy—for heat exhaustion. After we mixed and mingled at the end of the race “corral,” I am not sure the proper word for it, we ended up walking a little farther south to the Helsinki Central Library, which I’d really wanted to see.  I can’t believe I never visited it on our two previous trips.  It is architecturally amazing! Visit the link if you can. It is so swooping, airy, and light in there.  The top floor had the children’s books and play areas, so we spent some time up there, reading and playing. After about an hour, we went out seeking lunch and some shops I’d had on my list to visit (including one record store, which we popped in to), and the first was a lure for the kids’ too, Tingeling Toy Store.  It was super cool! I‘d read about it online.  I also had selected a few clothing shops for children that I was hoping would sell Finnish designers. We went to a few of them, and the first, like Tingeling, was in the Design District of Helsinki, and we got a little map.  If I’d had more time, I definitely would’ve liked to have gone to more stops on their little Design map. The first clothing shop had a very limited range of styles and it happened to be their grand opening party! It was a very tiny shop and they had just relocated to this located from Vantaa, which is where the airport is.  So, they were having a lovely little party—with a gorgeous cake, cupcakes, and fruit—and we got to join right in.  Talk about being in the right place at the right time! From there, we went on to another clothing store and it really had a huge range of toys, too.  It mostly had clothes from Denmark and the UK, though, and all of it was really expensive.  Yet, they had a play area, so that was a win, and Cece spent her time setting up a little tea party.  After that, we started to make our way towards home, and we ended up taking a bus, since we didn’t have it in us to walk the few miles back, not having had lunch and all starting to show the effects of that. So, once we got back to the apartment, Eric and Cece needed to nap in a serious way.  She went right down – and so did sleepy Eric, after his unplanned perhaps jetlag-induced early wake-up followed by the 11-mile run.  Rowan and I quickly pivoted to head out on our next adventure: to the Arabia-Iittala Design Center!  So, I’d planned for us to take the tram, but then I saw that the Design Center was closing at 4 p.m. and it was 3 p.m.  So, I decided I’d take the bull by the horns, or rather, the car by its manual transmission, and go for it!  I’ve driven exactly two manual transmissions in my life: Eric’s old Audi and his more recent Subaru, which we just sold.  I was never excellent at driving either and often burned the clutch or stalled on any incline slightly worth noting.  But, the draw of the Design Center was significant, so I got Rowan all strapped in and then quickly proceeded to stall the car on the first main road I was on.  I quickly regrouped, and did a much better job after that at figuring out where the “engagement point” or whatever it’s called, is.  Rowan made some comments about “what is that awful smell!!!”—about me burning the clutch—but he must’ve fallen asleep like right after that, because the next time I looked back, he was zonked out.  We made it there at 3:45, parked perhaps illegally, and then literally ran to the Design Center.  Turns out they closed at 5:00 – hooray!  So, Rowan managed not to break anything in a store full of glass, though there was one close call, and they even had a Finlayson outlet right in there too, so we saw a Moomin comforter set that we decided Santa might just pick up for Rowan on the way over Finland to New Mexico this coming Christmas.   We got no parking ticket and I did not stall once or burn the clutch once on the drive back in to central Helsinki.  After returning home, the sleeping people woke up and we walked a ton more that evening, culminating in a dinner of crepes and a swim (for the three humans in our family who are not me) at a popular-with-locals beach.  My children swam in their unders, since this was an unplanned outing.  They got to bed late, again, but it is light so late my kids are always confused about what time of day it is.  So, hoping for a really good night’s sleep, everyone turned in – to be ready to head to Moomin World the next day!

[falseroar]

Can You Wake Up? Part 3: Just a Dream

((Links to Part 1: Great Things and Part 2: I’m Sorry, You’re Dying))

Your expression must have answered for you, because Mark moved closer to your bed, pulling up a chair of his own so that he was closer to eye level. “Y/N? What’s wrong?”

You shook your head, ignoring the twinge in your neck as you tried to find the words to even begin to list everything that was wrong here. “I’m not…I’m Y/N, yeah, but I’m not them. That was just a bunch of videos, something you made up, Mark.”

Dark shifted in his chair, as if to get a better look at you. His intense gaze was not making things better. “You know about the Who Killed Markiplier videos.”

“Y-yeah,” you stammered, practically able to feel Mark’s disbelief even if you didn’t understand why he was surprised. You were thrown off by Dark’s stare but you continued, “Why wouldn’t I? I mean, they’re…right there on the first page of his YouTube channel…”

It was hard to just say you were a fan of Markiplier with Dark sitting right there. As much as you might have loved his character, being in the same room as him was…unsettling, like all of a sudden your whole body was sending off alarm bells to just get out of there every time he smiled or his eyes rested on you. Every now and then there would be a ripple in his appearance, a red or blue flash of something else in his dark aura that disappeared before you could really see it.

“Y/N,” Mark said, his voice shaking slightly. “I know your memories are a bit confused right now, you’ve been through a lot the past couple of…but you were the district attorney. You were our–my friend. Don’t you remember any of that?”

“No,” you said, trying to figure out why Mark wasn’t understanding. “I can’t be them, it wasn’t real. Even if it was, all of that took place back in like the 30s or 40s or something, right? I wasn’t even born then!”

You mentioned the year you were born and swore you saw Dark shoot Mark a look as he shifted uneasily in his chair.

“You remember another life,” Dark said, and when you nodded, added, “Dreams from the mirror.”

“No,” you said, feeling a rush of frustration. “They weren’t dreams, that was–is my life. I don’t…I don’t know what’s going on here, if I’m dreaming or what—”

“Y/N, I don’t know what you saw in that mirror, but maybe if you just tried to remember…” Mark trailed off, letting the suggestion rest in the air.

You felt a spike of anger, not something you ever expected to feel toward Mark, not really. A small voice in your head that sounded like you but not quite whispered, Why isn’t he listening? Doesn’t he know what he’s saying?

“Perhaps that dream was more…preferable to your reality,” Dark conceded. “If so, what drove you to break out of the mirror?”

“It��I…” Softly you said, “…It was an accident.”

You didn’t see the shared look between Mark and Dark, the alarm at those all too familiar words.

“The other car came around the corner too fast. I—I think my seatbelt broke, I thought there was something wrong when I buckled it before, but it was supposed to just be a short trip. I went out of the car, I-I-I—” You broke off, your eyes clouding over with the memory of the screeching metal, the crash, the pain, the people who just wouldn’t listen when you tried to move, to prove you were still alive. Or maybe it was just the tears making their way down your cheeks.

“Y/N,” Mark said softly, moving to put a hand on your shoulder to comfort you.

Again Dark grabbed his wrist, but you were the one who felt another flash of anger, stronger this time. The voice in the back of your head, the one calm part of you that wasn’t freaking out over all of this, spoke again: Don’t let them do this.

You sat up so that you could look them both straight on as you yelled, “It wasn’t a dream!”

“Y/N—” They both started to speak, but you were shaking now.

“Believe it or not, but someone telling me that my whole life, that everyone and everything I know and love isn’t real is not helping! Even if all of that stuff I can barely remember did happen, then that means you two are the last people I should ever trust!” You felt the tremor run through your body as what they were saying sank in. “It means one of you is a friggin demon wearing a friend’s face who trapped me in that mirror! Meanwhile, the other one’s the idiot who started all of this instead of just asking for help and who’s now walking around in that friend’s actual body!”

There it was. Because, if they were right, then that meant this wasn’t your Mark, the one you knew, loved, and at times wanted to throw into the ocean. This was Markiplier, Actor Mark, whatever you wanted to call him. The man who ruined so many lives in just three days, including, if they were right, your own.

But of course, none of this was real. Right?

“Wait, barely remember?” Mark asked, once he had recovered from your outburst. “So that means you remember something?”

“Really? That’s what you took from that?” You shook your head, ignoring the now familiar twinge in your neck as you tried to wipe away the tears. “I don’t know, earlier I thought I saw…It was just a mess of stuff, none of it made sense.”

Dark spoke, his soft, cajoling voice setting you back on your edge. “Y/N, please, tell us. It might help to talk about what you saw.”

He’s manipulating you, the voice in your head said, pointing out the obvious. But he’s right, you need to tell them.

“I saw you, and Mark, in the house from Who Killed Markiplier. Not, not together, I mean…” You paused, taking a moment to try and gather your thoughts. “It was different things, one after the other. One minute I saw the colonel crying, and then it’s Wilford, laughing. I saw…It looked like you, Mark, but its eyes were wrong, and its smile…”

Mark looked confused, so you tried to explain. “It looked like that thing from Tumblr a while back, when you changed your profile pic and did the whole mask thing.”

He looked even more confused now. “…What? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He was doing this now? “Seriously, Mark, you know what I’m talking about. All those weird posts when you were coming home from tour, right after you said Dark and Wilford were dead.”

Dark gave Mark the most outraged, affronted look he could muster. “You did what?”

“That was a joke,” Mark said hastily before he tried to turn the attention back to you. “But I really don’t know what you’re talking about. Still, you remember us and the colonel, so that’s a good start—”

This again. Before you could interrupt him yourself, the door to the infirmary burst open and slammed into the wall behind it as Wilford Warfstache barreled into the room.

“Y/N! There you are, you scamp!”

No one had time to react, and Mark and Dark certainly could not have stopped Wilford before he bounded across the room and leapt onto the bed next you, throwing an arm around your shoulders. Thank God he didn’t sit on the other side where all the wires and tubes were.

He grinned at you, his eyes practically shining above that ridiculous pink mustache, and you couldn’t help but grin back even if you still felt like crying. Maybe his smile was that infectious, or maybe it was just a relief to have some kind of distraction from what you were thinking right now.

“How did you know they were here?” Mark asked, rising from his chair. Opposite him, Dark also seemed to be bracing himself for something. “Wilford, do you…do you remember Y/N?”

“Do I?!” Wilford chuckled, giving your shoulder a squeeze. “Best unpaid intern I ever had! Until they went and ran off before I could give them their college credit! How have you been, Y/N?”

“Uh…” You hesitated, aware that both of the others just visibly relaxed. “Could be dead, so…”

“Brilliant!” Wilford looked at Mark as if just realizing he was here. “Why, if it isn’t the handsome, world-famous Markiplier! Back for another interview?”

“Oh, God no.”

“Mark was just stopping by to check on our friend here, Wil,” Dark said, eyeing the other ego carefully. “He won’t be spending the night.”

“Says who?” Mark said, but you were barely listening.

Wilford Warfstache was a crazy, dangerous man, you knew that. He killed people like it meant nothing, because to him it didn’t mean anything. It was all just a joke. If Mark and Dark were right, although you still believed this was just some dream or nightmare, then he was the man who had shot you.

But leaning against him now, you felt peaceful, to the point your eyelids began to droop, your body giving in to the desire to just go back to sleep.

You saw him again, gun in hand, facing the detective who had his back to the door. You reached out, unheard over the shouting, and felt your whole body jolt with the gunshot. You remembered the colonel, holding your body as tears dripped down his cheeks, repeating the same words over and over again.

“I’m so sorry. It was an accident,” he whispered in your ear.

“What did you just say?” Dark said.

“Left a red sock in the station wash, turned everything pink!” Wilford declared. “Poor Y/N got blamed for it, but I think it made all our clothes fabulous! Let me tell you about the time we took the Jims out for some investigative reporting…”

You fell asleep at some point in his story to the sound of his laughter rumbling through his chest where your head lay. While Wilford did not stop in telling one wildly false tale after another, his grip around your shoulders tightened just a bit, as if some small part of him was afraid you might disappear again.

((End of Part 3. Thank you again for reading! Juuuust out of curiosity, if you all were given the choice of getting out of here with Mark or staying in the Ego house at this point, what would you choose? 

Link to Part 4: Warning Signs

Tagging @silver-owl413 @determinedrevolutionary @cherrybomb-jaguar

Also super sorry to the person who messaged me earlier to be tagged, whose username I forgot to write down before I replied. I promise I didn’t forget you, I just have no clue what I’m doing.))

[imbeccablee]

Title: The Long Run

Summary: It’s Izuku and Ochako’s anniversary and Ochako has a BIG surprise.

ao3

Ochako considered herself to be a careful girl. She wasn’t one to take life-changing risks, nor was she one to rush head first into a problem. She could plan, strategize, pick her battles, just like many others she knew. She may not be as analytical as Deku, or as knowledgeable as Iida, but she was a cautious person who could learn from her environment.

Basically, she knew to take precautions for situations that required it. Like her friends, she was careful. Both she and Deku were.

Which is why the little positive symbol on the tiny, insignificant piece of plastic Ochako held in her hand absolutely stumped her.

Now that Ochako’s class had all graduated and went on to become sidekicks (and in some cases, actual up and coming heroes) in multiple different hero agencies around the globe, getting together regularly had become rather difficult. Many of her classmates had decided to stay in Japan like herself, if only because Japan was home, but some had gotten opportunities in different countries. They would come home when they could, but the life of a sidekick/hero is a busy one.

Still, the ones that stayed local were sometimes able to catch a break, and Ochako was able to have some much needed catch up time with her old schoolmates. If only the weight in her stomach‒both metaphorical and literal‒would go away enough for her to enjoy it.

“Say, Ochako… You’ve been really quiet this morning. Something wrong?” Tsuyu broke Ochako’s line of thought, effectively stopping her from spiralling back into the hole of worry and stress that had frequently surrounded her as of late.

“Huh? Oh, oh yeah, I’m fine. Just a bit preoccupied, is all,” Ochako evaded, and tried to come up with a reasonable excuse. “C-Cuz, you know, Deku and I’s anniversary is comin’ up soon, aaand I wanna make this one very special.” Yeah okay, that works.

“Ooooo, special you say?” Mina purrs and leans toward Ochako. Her lips curled into a promiscuous smirk that made Ochako’s face burn with the implications.

“Oh, you know what I mean, Mina!” Ochako waves the other girl away and sips at her latte with a pout. Mina only giggled and returned to her drink as well.

The outing between the three carried on, the other two talking about the current happenings of their lives. Ochako mostly listened, enjoying the stories her friends gave her. It’s nice, just getting to catch up like this. It’s been too long, and Ochako says as such.

Mina nodded in agreement. “Yeah, who knew heroing could take up so much of one’s time?”

“How do you and Midoriya do it, Ochako?” Tsuyu asked. “You two must barely see each other, even with working for the same agency.”

Ochako shrugged. “We make time. It can be hard, but we try.” She smiled, and the other two share a knowing look. “It's… It’s pretty easy to find time when you're… Well, y-you know.”

The two nodded. “Yeah we know,” Tsuyu said.

“You’re so lucky, Ochako!” Mina exclaimed. She leaned over the table and grabbed onto Ochako’s forearm. “To have the man you’ve been crushing over since your first year in high school! And for so long! It’s near impossible! Unthinkable! It’s like we’re in some shounen manga!”

Ochako laughed. “Yeah, yeah, I’m… I’m a pretty lucky girl, to have him…” Wonder how long that will last, with this new development. Ochako shook her head at the sudden pessimism. No, she shouldn’t be thinking like that. Deku loves her, has told her so many, many times over their many years together. Something as small… okay, it’s not small, it’s a pretty big thing to just drop on him, but either way, this won’t change a thing between them. It’ll be fine.

“Ochako?” Tsuyu once again brings her back to the conversation. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

They can help, is what she thought, and Ochako makes her decision. “Actually… There is something that happened…”

She revealed her secret and the remaining part of the minute is spent in silence. Tsuyu and Mina openly stared at her with what is plain shock on their faces, and Ochako suddenly felt that this was the wrong course of action.

“You’re… You’re kidding. You’re… You’re….” Mina trailed off.

“When are you telling him?” Tsuyu asked, touching her chin with a single finger.

Ochako rubbed her arm and looked to the side. “I wasn’t sure. I wasn’t even planning on telling you two right now, it just happened. I mean… I-I guess… I could tell him tomorrow? On our anniversary? ‘Cause he said he had this huge dinner planned out for us to celebrate.”

“That’d be a good time,” Mina agreed and leaned over the table again to put her hand on Ochako’s shoulder. “Hey. It’s gonna be okay. Okay?” She smiled. “He loves you. He’s gonna be absolutely ecstatic.” Tsuyu grinned and nodded.

Ochako let out a relieved breath and nodded as well. “Yeah. Yeah, he will!” She put a hand on Mina’s and smiled gratefully at both of her friends. “Thank you both so much.”

“Anytime, Ochako!” Mina said and hummed as she grinned toothily at the other girl. Tsuyu hummed as well, her eyes closed as she smiled.

“Well. I’ll see you both later,” Ochako said as she stood. “I’ve gotta prepare myself for tomorrow.”

“Of course, of course! Bye Ochako!”

The next day rolls around and Ochako found herself dolled up, hungry, and completely without a plan for how to break the news. The anxiety taking up the remaining part of her belly is something she hadn’t felt since the very beginning of their relationship. It’s probably the most unwelcome thing at the moment.

Ochako took a deep breath. Okay, okay. It’s gonna be fine, see? Calm down. He loves you. He loves you. This won’t change that. It’s okay. Ochako knows this. She knows this. It’s something that Deku has ingrained into her through their many years together. He loves her. He wants to be with her. Nothing on this earth could change that, he’s said. And still…

Ochako shook her head and slapped her cheeks with her hands. No, it’s going to be fine. You’ll tell him, he’ll cry, and everything will be okay. He’ll love both you and it with all of his heart because that’s what Deku does, he loves and loves and loves with no remorse or quarrel because he’s such a good frickin’ person and oh god what did you do to deserve him.

“Nothing,” Ochako answered herself, clasping her hands tightly to her chest. Her heart aches with all of the things she feels about him, the most prominent being the pure, unadulterated love she’s felt since their graduation. “You’ve done nothing to deserve him, but here we are, about to celebrate your anniversary with him. If he’s stayed here for this long, then he’s here to stay.” Ochako breathes out a slow breath and straightens from where she’d hunched her back. As she did, someone knocked on the door.

Grabbing her purse and slipping into her heels, Ochako walked to and opened the door. Deku stood there in an expensive-looking three piece suit with his hair slicked back. She smiled. He really knew how to dress up well.

“Good evening, Ochako,” Deku said, grinning, and Ochako giggled at his seriousness.

“Hello to you too, Deku.”

“You ready?”

“Yep!” She took his offered arm and they ventured out of her apartment.

They arrived at the restaurant in record time, and was seated in the near center of the dining area. Quiet music came from a ways away as a pianist played classical. The lighting was dimmed enough to fit the mood, but bright enough that one could see. The other diners were just as dressed up as Deku and Ochako were, and they were conversing quietly with their partners. It created a soft hum throughout the restaurant that only added to the mood. It was nice.

“Nice place,” Ochako commented quietly over the table.

Deku hummed in agreement. “Yeah, it is. I was hoping you’d like it. Kacchan had once taken Kirishima here and had told me that it was…” He coughed. “‘Less than shitty.’”

Ochako laughed. “Yeah, that sounds like Bakugou.”

“But anyway, I wanted tonight to be extra special…” He grabbed the hand that rested on the table and smiled at her. Her heart clenched at the adoration plain on his face. “You mean the world to me, Ochako, and I need you to know that. I would do anything to ensure you remained happy and okay forever and I…” He swallowed and looked at their intertwined hands. His thumb stroked the back of her hand for a few moments before he looked back up at her. “I’m just so in love with you, Uraraka Ochako.”

Ochako squeezed Deku’s hand and smiled so wide her cheeks hurt. “I’m so in love with you too, Deku.”

They stared at each other with identical smiles before their waitress came over to ask about their drinks not long after.

The evening went on as if it were a normal date between the two. They talked, laughed, ate. Ochako nearly forgot the main thing she had needed to tell him. For once, the intrusive thoughts she received frequently nowadays aided her.

She took in and let out a deep breath. She can do it. It’ll be okay.

“Hey… Deku…” Ochako began as the waitress set down in front of both her and Deku a beautiful piece of cake. It was picturesque, as if someone had drawn it, but also as if nothing would have been able to capture its beauty. Ochako didn’t think she’d ever had such a beautiful desert. Even the fresh strawberry atop of it looked unreal.

“Y-Yeah, Ochako?” Deku looked as nervous as Ochako felt, which was weird, considering. Why would he be so nervous? He glanced down at her piece of cake and then back at her multiple times. What was wrong?

“Are you okay?” Ochako asked, only prolonging the inevitability of her reveal.

“What? Oh-Oh, yeah, yeah, I’m fine, just.” He paused. “Juuuust, not wanting to, uh, end the date, I guess, heh. I want to keep spending time with you.” He smiled, and it was genuine, but the way sweat slid down the side of his face and the drumming of his fingers on the table still made Ochako suspicious.

“No seriously, something’s wrong. What is it?”

Deku shook his head and took a breath to calm down. “I’m serious, Ochako, I’m fine, just-” He swallowed. “Eat your cake?”

Ochako sighed and nodded. “Fine, fine, if that’s what you want.” Her fork slid into the cake easily and the cake tasted just as delectable as it looked. Indescribable, the taste of it. A single slice would hardly be enough to satisfy her. But anyway, back at the matter at hand.

She rested her hand on the table, fork still clutched, and stared at the cake. “Anyway, uh, Deku?”

“Yes, Ochako?” He stared intently at the cake as well.

“I have, um… Something to tell you…” She looked up.

“Oh?” He met her eyes in surprise. “What is it?”

“Nothing, just… Okay, it’s not nothing, but….” She gulped, closed her eyes, and opened her mouth. “I’m pregnant.”

His silence was what she expected, but it didn’t stop her heart from beating as hard as it did against her ribcage. She kept her eyes squeezed shut and let him process what she said, a constant mantra of he loves you he loves you he loves you repeating through her head. It’ll be fine, it’ll be fine, he loves you, it’ll be fine.

“Y… You… You’re…” He finally stuttered. “Y-You’re… hah….”

Ochako felt a pressure behind her eyes as tears began to accumulate and she opened them slowly. The picture she saw was also what she expected, but once again, did not stop the anxious beating of her heart.

Deku had tears freely falling from his eyes as he stared starstruck at Ochako. He looked like he couldn’t believe what she was saying, and looked genuinely at a loss for words. Ochako’s own tears gathered and blurred her vision. C’mon, say something, anything, please!

“You’re… Y-You’re pregnant… It’s.. It’s mine? Right?”

Ochako nodded quickly, to assure him. “Yes, yes, it’s all yours. There’s nobody else’s it could be.” He let out a watery laugh and wiped at his eyes quickly. “What… What do you think…?”

“What do I think? Oh, Ochako, you don’t even know.” He laughed again, looking ecstatic and Ochako felt her heart swell. “It, oh man, it makes this whole evening ten times more worth it. This-This makes things so much easier, I…”

“Easier? What do you…?” Ochako tilted her head in confusion. “The-The cake, continue eating.” His smile and laughter pulled her in, and she did. She didn’t know what it would accomplish, but there was a small inkling in the back of her head that made her tear up further. He watched her eat the cake excitedly, his mouth covered by both of his hands. There were still tears in his eyes, but it was obvious that they were happy ones, good ones, the kind that you only get when something extremely fantastic has happened to you.

The thought that she could have made him so happy as to cry makes her tears fall as well and he begins to fret over that, laughing as he does because he must also realize that they are just two big messes that are too in love for their own good.

In the middle of her telling him that she’s fine, there’s a glint from below her. Her eyes flit down and see the light from above bouncing off something small. Her heart leaps into her throat and she paws at it with her fork. She sticks the mouthful of cake passed her lips and lo and behold, she tastes metal. After a moment of cleaning it off with her tongue, she retrieves it from her mouth as elegantly as she can and stares at the small ring of gold in her palm. Her other hand comes up and covers her mouth, and the tears continue.

She looked up in disbelief and when she does, Deku breaks again. He laughs and cries, and when she asks if he means it, he nods and she breaks again as well.

They both get up at the same time and collide against each other beside their table. They hug each other tightly, and Ochako nearly sobs, “I thou-I thought you would, like, like, be so upset, or something! I-I thought you-you’d stop seeing me, or-or stop loving me, but you’re so so happy and I just-!”

Deku pulled away and cupped her cheeks with his hands. His thumbs brush away her tears and he laughs as she hiccups past them. “Nothing could ever make me stop loving you, Ochako. Sweetie, sweetie, you-you’re stuck with me. There’s no getting rid of me. Not now, and not ever. Honey, baby, Ochako, I’m in it for the long run.” Ochako half sobs, half laughs and nods along. He laughs as well and stares fully into her shining eyes. Once again, Ochako’s chest aches with the amount of love and affection that completely radiates from him. “Ochako, Ochako, will you-will you keep fighting by my side as we climb the hero ranks? Would you keep patching me up after every fight? Would you allow me to clean you up as well? Would-Would you?” His voice caught and began to shake as he continued asking her to marry him. “Would you continue to keep my bed warm? Would you continue joining me for dinner? Would you? Would you please-?” He huffed out a watery laugh. “Would you please allow me to be the father of your child?”

“You-you already are,” Ochako whispers, and Deku lets out another sob before he wraps himself around her again. Distantly there is clapping, but all Ochako can see and hear and feel is Deku, Deku, Deku, and the cold that is the ring as it slides onto her finger, and that’s all she really cares about. Because, to quote what he’d said, she was stuck with him, and he was stuck with her as well. She, too, was in it for the long run, and all that that included.

Izuocha Week Day One: Firsts

First kid/First marriage/First proposal/First embarrassingly emotional and romantic moment in public, take your pick

[chimericarchitect]

Two to Tango

(( In which Saness tries to be sneaky about helping her friend-not-friend and it backfires spectacularly when An0n gets directly involved, resulting in the death of Eri. ))

Eri: You lean on the railing, looking out over the night. The ocean is dark, and relatively calm. Over in the other direction, the city is more properly lit up. You guess it looks nice. It doesn't really help your mood, though. The Angel moves up from where it was resting, curls around your body, head up into your hand. You gently pet it, while it whispers to you, and you just keep looking out into the night.

Your phone buzzes, and you look to it. Oh, god. You text with one hand. While you're dealing with Sol, another notification pops up. Saness. She...  Oh fuck.

Saness: Nothing better than a little breaking-and-entering to make someone forgive your earlier transgressions, right? You're kinda scared to appear on the cliff though, because he might try to shoot you... Even appearing here in the ground level of the lighthouse, you've got a thick barrier of protective unseen psi around your person, and you've used your disguise amulet to look like a cat. There's nothing weird about a cat using a transportalizer, surely. An0n told you that they're the one who gave Eri the angel, and that they fed from his sanity... Eri will heal, supposedly, but you can't just abandon your friends, even if he doesn't see you as one.

Eri: You put your phone away angrily. It's fine, it's fine. She stopped responding, so she got the message, Sol and Kar are fine as well, you can help them out soon. Why did this go this way, god dammit. The Angel rubs against your hand, and it reassures you. It's alright, you're fine, you're a prince, these issues will be far below you soon enough. 

You've had enough sightseeing. You tell the Angel that you're going back inside, and it stays curled around you just a moment longer before slinking off to give you space. It'll be alright, always waiting for its Prince. You smile, then head on down. You'll get something to eat, maybe.

Saness: It takes you a moment to work up the nerve to ascend, listening for Eri or sounds of outrage. Upon hearing nothing, you go, though it takes effort to keep your footfalls quiet in a lighthouse stairwell; you only look like a cat to others and are actually a normal troll walking in an upright position. 

Eri: Down here, and it's time to look through your fridge. What garbage can you get out of here tonight.

Okay, fine, you'll go with that, that doesn't look too old. Pizza out, a few slices put onto a plate, shoved into a microwave. You lean against your counter, and just wait, listening to the hum of the machine.

Saness: Up the stairs, all the way to the kitchen, and you know he's there. The sound of shuffling and the ping of a microwave promises such. What should you do? You peer around carefully to watch him, heart a wild thing in your chest. You have the flower anon gave you to cure him.  Wait.  Why are you a cat?  Cats can't talk, or do things like convince people to put flowers in their mouths. .....  You have a picture of An0n.  You could just as easily look like him. 

Eri: Ding! It's done. Open it up, get out your now heated meal, and walk over to sit down and get on that. It's quiet. It's far too quiet. You should do something, like put some music on, or something. ... Are you alone? You think you're alone.

Saness: And then An0n in troll form walks boldly into the kitchen, leaning cockily against the doorframe and wearing a fiendish grin. Holy fuck, you're sweating.

The Magic An0n: > Seduce Eri. Do it.

Eri: You're not alone. "Wasn't expectin' you to come around so soon."

Saness: Your grin widens as though the two of you were sharing a joke, and you oh-so-slowly lift a finger in front of your sharp maw in a shushing motion.

Eri: You give a little head tilt, but remain silent. What's going on with him?

Saness: Oh god, don't be suspicious. You stand upright off the wall and take a step forward, using your bracer to blink out of reality and back into it only a few feet away from Eri. You're guessing; you've never met An0n, but if you were a spooky chaos-and-mischief entity, you would totally pop in an out of existence to startle people. In your palm is the four-petaled flower, though you have yet to present it to Eri. When you do, it is with a flourish.

Eri: A gift, it seems. Or a trick. Almost certainly a trick. He really thinks you're going to fall for that? You laugh, and stand, having a final bite of pizza before you walk to lean on the counter again. "Are we going to, uh.. talk about what happened last time?"

Saness: You roll your borrowed cyan eyes, incorporating a tilt of your head into the motion so that when your gaze comes to rest on Eri again, you can disappear and dramatically port comfortably in front of him, using your psi to sit with one leg hooked over the other in the air, just slightly overhead. Your arms are crossed like you are bored.

Eri: God, he's trying to get to you by not saying shit. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. "Look, I'm- I'm sorry about doin' that to you, it was sudden, an' you clearly weren't comfortable. But I, uh. Still think what I did back then, I guess."

Saness: Oh god no, he's talking to you about something An0n would know and you would not. Which is a lot of things, come to think of it. Your eyes narrow over your smile as though you were considering his words, though in fact you are fumbling.

Eri: "So, uh, I hope maybe we can work somethin' out for that, if you're comfortable."

Saness: You grin wider, slowly, as though your actions is in response to his question (to which you have no context), and you present the blue flower once more, uncurling your fingers around it for him to take from your palm, head tilted forward juuuust slightly.

Eri: You look down at the flower, and... something about this seems off. He was offering this before you brought it up, so is he just ignoring you? Why is it blue, when everything involving An0n has been monochrome before now? "What is this, An0n?"

The Magic An0n: > Technically, An0n's eyes are blue, and everything he accents with is blue.

Eri: >That's true, but the rat wasn't.

The Magic An0n: > At least on his blog, the rat wasn't.

Karkat: > Rats don’t come in blue Eri.

The Magic An0n: > Also that.

Saness: Not that it matters, really. You feel the walls of the trap closing around you and decide that now is probably a good time to call this all off. One last gambit. You close your hand around the flower before floating down to stand on the ground. What would a chaos god do when scorned? You have no idea. "You won't accept my gift, then?" You definitely don't sound like An0n, but you're banking on ~chaos magic~ being a thing. For your part, you don't sound like yourself, at least. Or, you're trying not to.

Karkat: > Roll for deception.

The Magic An0n: > From the corner of the kitchen, a black rat lounges. It appears to be watching. It's eyes glow blue.

Eri: That is absolutely not his voice. Alarm bells start properly going off in your head. Didn't talk before now, when he's always so wordy and wanting to get in a few words to rib at you. Coming by without warning, when he would either allude to doing it first, or asking. Disappearing and reappearing, when normally he wisps around like he's made of darkness. What's going on? You do a roll for perception.

Saness: > Time to die.

Eri: Your roll is low. You tell yourself it's fine. It's him, things are just weird at the moment. You're on edge because of Saness, and Sol, and Kar, and even though he's acting so weird, it must be him. Maybe something was going on you didn't know about. You deflate a bit, look away. "I'm... fuck, I'm sorry, An0n. I'm just on edge at the moment."

Saness: You don't know what to say. You can't properly impersonate someone you don't know, and you know Eri will not be so forgiving if he finds out that it's you here. Not that he's intent to forgive you anyway. You're just going to have to accept this as mission failure, flower hidden by your hand returned to your 'dex, cyan eyes watchful on Eri. You just need to make an appropriate escape.

The Magic An0n: The rat sits on the counter's edge like a person, feet dangling, ankles crossed, staring eerily at the pair with burning cyan eyes. He's behind Eri, but Saness could easily spot him.

Eri: "...Yeah, I get it. I should have just accepted it. But I know you. That would obviously do something weird. Yes, yes, not bad, just weird."

Saness: Oh fuck. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck. Though you notice An0n (whose appearance in the room sends a panicked chill down your spine), you keep your attention rather fixed on Eri. Wouldn't want him turning around right now! An0n could give you away any number of ways, and you are forced to trust that they won't just... ruin you. The game must go on. "Not everything I do is bad, or weird. Maybe I'll come around again later to give you my gift, when you're feeling more... interesting." There. A jab. Just a teeny insult to assert yourself.

Eri: "Oh come the fuck on, I'm plenty interesting. You've made me plenty interesting." Just to prove what you mean, you let your horns spark a little with violet psi. "You're not even going to tell me what the gift is?"

Saness: "Now where's the fun in that?"

The Magic An0n: The rat hops down from the counter, and it's a cat before its paws hit the floor. A soft, quiet landing. Casual, graceful padding towards Eri's legs, sitting on his haunches just out of sight behind the seadweller's legs. He's absolutely riling Saness up intentionally. That cheshire grin sure looks at place and surreal on a cat's face, all at once.

Eri: "You want fun? We could go to the arena again, that was a lot of fun."

Saness: Sweating intensifies beneath the veneer of An0n, for you could not possibly provide this arena and you know An0n is being a fuck to mess with you. Maybe they're going to toss you under the bus anyway; you are at once the obstacle in the road and the driver of the bus poised to run yourself over, of which you are very well aware. "Not the curious sort, are you. How disappointing." Can you goad him into anything? You doubt it. You doubt everything. You stick your hands in your pockets, unblinking, intent in your gaze.

Eri: "I was already askin', you can't call me curious for shit." He's trying to fuck with you, you get that now, you won't let him. Instead, you move, turning to head towards the cage where that rat he gave you is.

The Magic An0n: An0n also looks towards the cage. While Saness cannot provide, he can.

Saness: You are completely clueless toward the significance of the rat in the cage, turning your attention coolly and calmly toward Eri as he heads that way even as you remain certain that maintaining such an elevated pulse for such an extended period of time is bad for your health. "You don't even want to try it? Clinging to the tested, when what I'm offering you could be so much better."

Eri: "I know you'll come up with something different. And combat chaos is always good, right?" Of course, you need to go up to the bedroom, since that's where the cage is, since that's where you last put it down.

The Magic An0n: Oh boy. The cat rises to pad along after him.

Saness: You're going to follow him with a sinking sense of dread, because the jig is almost up and you have yet to convince him to put this darn plant in his mouth. What can you even say? Nothing.

Eri: You arrive up here, heading over to the cage immediately, looking into it at the little rat fella. From the other set of stairs, the one you didn't just use, the head of an Angel peers.

Saness: Oh fuck, what is that? Luckily Eri didn't just see the incredibly surprised expression on your borrowed face when you glance over the angel.

The Magic An0n: Soft padding of a cat. He waits for Saness to arrive, then moves to her, climbing up her illusion to rest blended into the shoulder, as if it were solid. Cyan eyes close to mere slits, watching in silence, closed-mouth still curved up wide.

Eri: The Angel looks back at Saness. It says nothing, and does not move. You reach into the cage, retrieving the rat, watching it for a while as it scurries around your hand. "Ready to fight again, An0n?"

The Magic An0n: "Quite," he says, right up by the head of the illusion so it sounds natural, regardless of Saness's feelings or response.

Saness: !!!!! This is very bad. Your expression is one of natural alarm, eyebrows lifted slightly on a face too shocked for any real expression. You probably look very neutral, beyond An0n's smoky-dark eyebrows.

Eri: You nod to yourself, take a deep breath, and squeeze.

The Magic An0n The rat squeals its pain, then white blood coats Eri's fingers as usual. Likely gruesome to Saness.  Of course, after that, no one is here at all. All three bodies, where they stand, are now suspended in a void of black. 

----------

Sollux: You arrive at the ground level of the lighthouse with your matesprit filled with dread and foreboding just moments afterward. You're practically dragging him to go up the stairs with you. Unfortunately, you will find nothing.

----------

The Magic An0n: World of black where they can only see each other. Feel free to respond to that sudden change before I start the reveal of location.

Eri: For you, this is expected. You turn back towards An0n.

Saness: You are stunned, frightened, and very much rigid with that same neutral expression of shock. This is not what you'd intended at all. Arena? Arena? You're no fighter. Your cyan stare looks over Eri impassively from head to toe. Good job, Saness. Really nailed it this time.

The Magic An0n: The floating "trolls" fund themselves landing in a soft thump on their feet on the ground. It feels hard and only mildly forgiving, and moments afterward, the light radiates outward. The ground is dark earth, with scattered sprouts of grass. In front of them, trees, trees so tall they block out the sun with their combined branches even in this clearing. It's a forest. Animals gather at the perimeter, pastel-pale with white eyes.

An0n stands up on Saness's illusion's shoulder and stretches in a curl, revealing himself.

"You should have listened to her~" he teases, almond-shaped cyan eyes locked on Eri. "She was trying to save you."

A kick backwards with the cat foot, and the entire illusion's head dissolves into black smoke. He jumps onto the ground with sinking impact for the distance, straightening himself on four paws. Saness's entire illusion melts away in that smoke, revealing the limeblood for what she is. A giggle, and An0n starts bounding off between them, behind them. When they turn around, they'll find themselves faced with a triangular opening in a mossy cliff face, thirty feet tall at its peak and fifteen wide at the base. Clawmarks around the edges and the ground indicate that something very large lives here, and the small black cat bounds in. Nothing about this situation implies that he should be followed.

Eri: You don't think to follow him anyway, considering you don't watch which way he goes. No, you're too busy staring at An0n-- Saness-- first with wide eyes, then, for just a fraction of a second, a feeling of deep hurt and betrayal, before it's washed away with pure anger, and you sneer. "YOU!"

Saness: It seems that you are having a technical malfunction, too utterly wrecked to really react when An0n leaps away and dissolves your disguise. You racked up the cost with your gambling, and now you have to foot the bill. Betrayal, again. This time though, you knew what you were doing. "Me."

The Magic An0n: A loud noise comes from the cavern. There's bigger things to worry about at the moment.

Eri: "You-- You fuckin'--" You look over, just for a moment, at the noise.

Saness: You turn to see that claw-scraped cavern, distracted from Eri in that instant.

The Magic An0n: Heavy footsteps from within start making their way out, not loud but easily felt by the trolls at the mouth.

Eri: Again, for a moment, you turn back to her. "I'll deal with you in a moment. Stay out of my damn way." And so, you turn and start storming towards the cave.

Saness: Gulp. Those tremors belong to something big, but it's Eri's motion that makes you snap to reality, following him immediately. "Wait!! You want to fight it in an enclosed space??"

The Magic An0n: Giant cyan eyes burn out from the darkness, and a roar sounds to warn Eri to stay back. The arena is the clearing. Stepping halfway out of the opening is a massive dragon, cyan eyes and ebony black scales. The wings are folded, but by it's movements, it's easy to see that this beast is specifically a wyvern. Large claws connected to heavy wings step forward and curve into the dirt, just the right size for the clawmarks in the stone. Its mouth opens, white-blue flames in its throat. It's wearing glasses, clearly, it's An0n.

"Perhaps the two of you together can try this beast on for size, hmm?"

When the black smoke dissolves away, a white dragon is left behind with the blue flames, and it roars.

Eri: Your steps stop once the beast comes into view, and you instinctively retrieve your cutlass from your Sylladex, entering a fighting stance. You're not afraid. You can do this. A fight's chaos, but you're a tactician. You can do this.

Saness: Together? Is An0n mad?? You're all about teamwork, but Eri... He won't work with you. Not before, and not now. You're not a fighter, you're not, but you trot up to be parallel with Eri, a few feet away for maneuverability, and change your specibus to Make-Believe-Kind. Your other weapons are useless here, but you can't sit back and do nothing.

The Magic An0n: A distance away, An0n manifests as his typical Chu form, floating pleasantly on his tail to watch the hell that's about to go down. Hope Saness has good reaction time with those barriers, because they're both about to get bathed in flames.

Eri: You don't have enough time to dodge out of the way. You still do, of course, but things get very hot for you. Yeah you're burning.

Saness: It would be over pretty quickly for you if you weren't quick with your barriers, because you are not agile and not a trained combatant. Eri can't burn when you're building walls for the both of you though. You'll stay closer next time to keep the heat off, so to speak, since he seems a little singed. "Sorry!"

Eri: You're too busy crying out in pain to respond to Saness, but you eventually get back onto your feet, and just try and charge this thing with your sword in hand.

The Magic An0n: It comes forward and tries to swipe at Eri with a large claw from its forelimb. It sees and recognizes the Sharp thing as a shiny. Its scales are too sturdy for the sword to have any effect, Eri will soon find. At best, he'll be able to damage the wing membrane or some delicate facial features.

Saness: Fuck, okay. It's going to be an on-off game with your barriers with an attack strategy like that; they have to come up to block things and go down to allow him to strike. You take to the sky so as to split up the target range and (sorry dragon) play interference by yanking viciously on its claws to derail the swipe into the soil. There is no barrier on Eri presently.

Eri: You hit scale, and it does pretty much nothing, and you end up hit by a claw. It doesn't cut you too bad, but it does pierce, and send you flying back, hitting the ground hard, and losing your sword.

Saness: Wow, he still managed to be hit by the claw even as you'd moved it off course. Maybe you moved it into his dodge, who knows. What you do know is that apparently Eri is shit at fighting, because he looks like a damned mess. The barrier goes back over him while he recovers and you focus on bodily shoving the dragon around. "Hey!"

The Magic An0n: The dragon is distracted successfully! It tries to reach out and snap at Saness with its teeth. Nom!

Eri: Okay, you're injured, and mad, and god dammit. You get to your feet again, shakily, and clutching your chest.

Saness: You yelp when jaws snap against your barrier, reshaping it to have sharp spikes of force protruding from it. Bleed, fool. Biting is rude!

The Magic An0n: Exactly one spike gets inside its mouth, and pearly white blood flows from that new wound between its teeth. The scales are tougher, and this just makes it mad. It rears back and spreads its wings, looks like it's about to fly after her. Right now, she's the bigger threat.

Eri: You need to do something, here. You equip a much better weapon, and with Ahab's Crosshairs in your hands, you open fire on the beast.

Saness: > RIP Saness The Magic An0n: The force of the weapon sends the beast toppling into the cliff face. It's not injured, but it's clear that Ahab's force is enough to send it reeling. Target changed. Eri is now the bigger threat. It lunges forward, throwing its tail like a scorpion's sting to hit the weapon.

Saness: > Oh wait, there was a barrier on Eri. Wouldn't it have blasted him too before breaking through? > Saness, two for two.

Eri: You essentially just fired at a wall right in front of you. You're blown back, whole front hurt from the explosion, and you're on the ground injured when the tail comes. It hits you dead on. Something inside you cracks.

Saness: The familiar sound of Ahab’s firing and the sharp mental ache of your barrier being destroyed stuns you for a moment, makes you lose altitude and prevents you from acting when the dragon lashes out at Eri. You can see the strike hit home, see him laying there bleeding. That could be a corpse. Right now. He might be a corpse. He could be dead, right now, and it would be your fault. You panic. No no no! What are you doing?? You slam into the dragon with your psi, using sharp edges to shred at its wings. "Come on!!"

The Magic An0n: The dragon is distracted by the pain of its wings shredding. It flaps them, spraying white-hot pearly blood at her, then turns away from the prey to screech, grounded from the damage. Successful interference of body eating, it is now standing over Eri's body.

Eri: You are currently not in a position to get up, what with all the pain you're in. Honestly, everything is a blur. Did your glasses get knocked off?

Saness: Okay, not enough to really do anything, but at least the dragon isn't- isn't attacking Eri.

But Eri isn't moving. Maybe the dragon doesn't need to attack him anymore.

"Come on!!" you repeat, scared and teary. Tears don't help, coward. You slice at the dragon's face with your psi, aiming for that maw opened in a screech, prying at the jaws to keep that mouth open. If Eri would only get up, and fire into that mouth... You don't want to believe that he could be dead.

The Magic An0n: It snarls and shakes its head viciously, drool splattering. How strong is Saness's barrier? Because the soft peeps coming from inside the cave seem to refuel the dragon's rage, and it's lunging after her, trying to crush the barrier holding its jaws open with impressive power.

Eri: You try to get up, find out that's really painful, and proceed to K.O.

Saness: !! Eri moved! Even if you were strong enough to hold the dragon's jaw open (probably not for any extended period of time), that movement is enough to distract you, and the barrier shatters in that sharp mouth. Another yelp as you lose several feet of altitude, again, dizzy with the effect of that blow.

The Magic An0n: Teeth click together loudly and it cries at her, trying to fly but failing thanks to tattered membranes, it does not lift. Instead, it tries to slap Saness out of the air with long fingerbones.

Saness: You manage to throw up a barrier in time to prevent yourself from taking damage, but the swipe brings you down to the soil, grounding you. You need to get to Eri, so you grab those fingerbones in your barrier and attempt to engage a crocodile death roll with the dragon.

Eri: Zzzz.

The Magic An0n: The dragon does not roll with her psi, and instead those fingerbones break. Instantly, it tries to bite. Animal that it is, it's not afraid of trying to bite the limbs off to survive, even if that would mean death later.

Saness: Oh god, you feel immediately sickened, releasing the dragon and darting farther away from Eri, hoping to lure the dragon and distract it while you lift Eri in your psi. You just have to grab him and then you can both leave, that's all you have to do. Come on, surely An0n sees that you've both lost! Do they seriously intend to kill you??

The Magic An0n: An0n is watching in delight the whole time. The blood though, the scent of burning blood attracts it. With broken fingers and an injured mouth, it decides that Saness isn't worth chasing. It turns back to Eri instead. Throwing a heavy claw down on the troll's chest with enough strength to shatter his ribcage, it curves its head around to get its teeth under his head, lifts its claw, then sucks his whole torso in before picking him up. Gonna do the bird thing to swallow him whole by lifting him up in the air.  This is a good time for Saness to try pulling him out, cause he'll get bitten in half in an attempt to keep the prey.

Eri: Welp. You don't got much more to contribute here.

Saness: To have smashed Eri in that manner was to smash your psi that held him as well, and you fumble helplessly as the dragon consumes your friend-not-friend, staggering in place. You are now momentarily frozen in horror.

The Magic An0n: Swallow! Down the troll goes effortlessly. If he wasn't dead from the chest smash, he will be momentarily. The dragon turns to Saness now. It looks ready to go eat her, too.

Saness: You can't just leave Eri.

But he's dead.

But you can't just leave him-

But he's dead!

But-

You watched the dragon eat him.

You turn your gaze away from the dragon and up to An0n where he floats, defeated and weary, too stunned for tears. Is this what they wanted? This isn't just chaos, it's so much worse.

The Magic An0n: In her defeat, the dragon closes in, about to clamp its jaws around her torso sideways. Right before the teeth make impact, the dragon freezes like stone. Three baby peepers make concerned noises at the mouth of the cave.

Saness: You stagger backwards out of the stony mouth, part of your mind screaming about how you almost let yourself die, but the rest of you is sad and wretched and awful. You deserve it, if Eri remains dead. Will he remain dead? You don't know. Would An0n really kill him? You don't know. A glance at the frozen dragon, then up to An0n, and then you're sullenly making your way around the rigid reptile in order to better see the source of the peeping concern. Babies? Baby dragons?

The Magic An0n: They are indeed baby dragons. They run out to their frozen mother, before they too freeze. An0n comes to a drop on top of the dragon's head, the mother, who begins to disintegrate slowly into the air like magic from her highest point.

"I think it's about time I sent you back."

Saness: "What? Wait, what about Eri?"

An0n has your undivided attention, some modicum of clarity returning to you for being addressed, and for the promise of going back, hope and dread warring across your features.

The Magic An0n: An answer is not provided. Instead. He floats again once the head beneath him disintegrates, and the baby dragons turn to dust too. Eri's body crumples to the ground where the dragon's stomach was, clear damages to his clothes and flesh from the highly acidic environment in combination with the burns and lacerations he'd already received. Before Saness can even go to him though, An0n's voice echoes through her very soul.

"Go back."

She doesn't get a choice, for when she blinks next, she'll find herself standing in the middle of the hive she'd built for herself and Ringleader.